#tw: ghosts | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sortofanobsession · 1 year

Text

Will o’ the Wisp - Ch. 3 (Umbrella Academy WIP)

Author’s Note: Wow, this is long overdue but I finally got time to go over plot summaries, transcripts, etc. so that I wouldn't totally screw everything up hopefully. But I'm still here. Still trying, just dealing with a lot on my plate. Unbeta’d.

Please see chapter 1 for explanation of characters and character name details for Viktor. (again I am willing to take suggestions on this)

Minors DNI

So as it goes, Y/N = your name. Y/N/N = your nickname. Reader pronouns She/Her.

Tag Requests are Open just message me.

Primary Pairing: Diego Hargreeves x Female!Reader

Series Masterlist

Chapter 2, Chapter 4

Word count: 4k+

Content Warning: Canon typical neglect, manipulation, violence, death, depression, anxiety, fear, mentions torture

Chapter 3: Bail and Boiler Rooms

The faint glowing orb hovers just beyond Diego as he approaches a crime scene. She continues to follow him until he is busted by Patch. The image of him being tazed made her laugh, or she probably laughed. The Wisp couldn't exactly make verbal noises, and her body wasn't really her main focus. It was safe at the academy. She watches Patch take his radio and fake badge. With a sigh, Y/N didn’t let the orb fade as she pulled back most of her consciousness. She kept enough of her mind there to keep to the periphery of wherever her brother was. She was vaguely aware of how he’d seem to furrow his brow and glance in the light’s direction as he was moved. But she would shift the positioning every time and refocus on what she was doing in her primary form.

She didn’t need him drawing attention to the fact she was basically sneaking around, especially once at the precinct. She was basically trespassing. But it was technically not illegal. She knew physically she wasn’t trespassing, physically her body was at the academy. No one could prove what the lights were. Not like they could catch her. The Wisp technically didn’t have a corporeal form, especially when it was just a small fraction of her powers. She makes quick work of changing out of her pajamas and grabs her coat as she slips on her shoes. She doesn’t bother sneaking out like she would have done as a child. Her father wasn’t there to scold her. She glanced at Grace up in her little alcove as she made her way to the door. Allison and Luther wouldn’t care if she left. She didn’t need to leave a note or make excuses. She knew they cared for her, in their own way, but what did it matter in the long run? She was rarely there anyway. And really, was she even really mentally there now? If Grace or Pogo had noticed, she’d have told them, but they didn’t. It was like everyone was off in their own little worlds. Ones that were almost foreign to her now. She makes her way to the police station. She ignores the staring and hushed whispers. Especially when the glow around her seems to intensify for a moment as she lets the orb that had been watching over Diego fade and her powers settle into her form. She forced a sweet smile on her face at the double-take she got as she approached the desk sergeant on duty.

“Umm, hi, I’m here to collect my idiot brother, Diego Hargreeves. Detective Patch-”

“Is right here,” a voice calls as the detective approached. “Wasn’t aware anyone made a call to his family to collect him.”

“They didn’t,” Y/N states. “I try to keep tabs on my siblings, and I’m not normally in town, but-”

“Y/N, right?” Patch says as she gestures for Y/N to follow her.

“Yeah,” the last of the Hargreeves nodded.

“Not exactly the sibling I figured would be the one to bail him out,” Patch admits.

“Sometimes I surprise even myself,” Y/N mumbles.

“I read the book, you know,” Patch tells her as they approach the hallway to the holding cells. Patch doesn’t miss the way the glow around Diego’s sister flickers, and dims momentarily, as the glowing form lets out a dry chuckle. “Then I’m not surprised you think it’s odd I’m here.”

“Maybe,” Patch nods. “But family, Hargreeves or not, are often the ones to collect their wayward siblings from lock up. From what it sounds like, you’re not unfamiliar with the process.”

Y/N snorts a laugh again. “I’m sure some poor desk sergeant or even hospital has my number stamped on a file for Klaus.”

“Always frustrating when they won't even help themselves, let alone let you help them,” Patch says somewhat vaguely as she signs a paper and gestures to an officer towards the holding cells. She waits until the guard opens the cell and calls Diego out. The glowing Hargreeves didn’t move into the hallway, instead choosing the lean on the wall beside the entryway. She can feel the exhaustion of the day deep in her bones. The strain of keeping the Wisp contained and dimmed to limit the awkwardness to those around her wasn’t helping. She takes a few seconds to mentally prep for dealing with whatever would come out of Diego’s mouth when he finds out she was there. She silently waits while her brother and the detective have a short talk. She pushes off the wall when she hears them approach. She steps closer to the hallway as they come into view.

Patch gestures to Diego and tells her, “Well, this one is your problem now.”

“Thanks, Detective,” the female Hargreeves nods. The detective leaves the siblings for what is bound to be an awkward reunion.

“I knew it!” Diego shouted when Patch was gone. Ignoring the way her shoulders immediately stiffen as she crosses her arms over her chest. “I knew I saw that demon light of yours.”

“Rude to say to the only sibling that bothered to bail you out,” Y/N grit her teeth and shook her head at his tone. “Your welcome, by the way.” Trying to mentally remind herself what Five had said, they needed to work together.

“I didn’t ask for you to bail me out,” Diego seethes.

“And I didn’t ask if you cared,” she glares at him. “Because wow, shocker, you don’t. But Grace does, so again, you’re welcome.”

“They would have let me go in the morning,” Diego states.

“And…you know what, yeah, they probably would have. But I told Five I would try, and-” She stops and rubs at her temples. She missed the confused look Diego gave her before he schooled his features. He had no idea that Five had asked her to do anything outside of what he’d told all of them. Let alone anything having to do with Diego. He eyed her cautiously as she continued. “It has been a very long day, and I forgot how exhausting trying to actually care for everyone is.”

“I didn’t-”

“I know, Diego, okay?” He watched as her shoulders dropped as she spoke. She looked tired. “I get it. You don’t need help. You don’t want help, especially from me,” she said, her tone almost as blue as the Wisp’s glow.

“That’s not–” he started to argue.

“Can we just go home?” She asks before flinching at her own choice of words. The academy wasn’t home anymore. Hadn’t been for years. And why was she asking him? Why did she even want to go back? Everyone she was used to caring for was gone. The ones that used to actually want her around or seek her out weren’t there. Not even Vanya said goodbye. Five was back, but he didn’t seem to have time for her. Ben’s statue was still broken and a painful reminder that no one was going to need her during the night. And she knew her siblings still felt unnerved by the Wisp these days. Or really at who she had become. What had changed? Nothing really.

Diego watched as her brow furrowed, and she seemed to be arguing with herself. “Hold on-”

“You can go home,” she says as she turns on her heels, she was too tired to argue with him anymore. “I’m going to go back to the academy. Try not to get arrested again. I would like to get a few hours of sleep.”

She manages to catch a bit of sleep, but it was far from decent. And left pretty much to herself, she sat on the bed, back to the wall, and sent out her orbs. Pulling back one by one as she figured out where her siblings were. But something at the back of her mind still pushed her. So she pulls her focus back into her own body and goes to where she knows Diego lives. She uses her Wisp as a distraction as she enters the gym and sneaks her way into the boiler room he stays in.

She is surprised when Luther finds her first. "Huh, not the brother I expected to see here," she states.

"You here to see if he killed dad too?" Luther asks.

“What? No.” She shakes her head. "I'm here because he’s a self-destructive idiot who is going to get himself arrested again."

"For murder?" He asks for clarification. “Wait, again?”

“Yes again. And no, for impersonating a cop. As lovely as his detective friend is, I’m not sure she’ll be as happy to see me in such a short time span, even if it is to bail his ass out and get him out of her hair.”

“You bailed him out?” Luther says, shocked. “Diego. You bailed Diego out of jail.”

“I bail out Klaus all the time,” she states.

“But you like Klaus, and this is Diego we’re talking about.”

“You wouldn’t if called upon?” She tries to make this less about her.

“He called you to bail him out?” He asks in utter disbelief. Diego hated her almost as much as he hated him.

“Of course not, no one called me-” She realizes her slip-up as Luther’s eyebrow raises.

“Wait, no one called you to bail him out, and you did?”

“He’s still our brother, Luther,” her voice a bit quieter than it had been when she adds, “Even if he hates me.”

“But how did you…wait, you didn’t-” Luther starts, but she is quick to change to the topic.

"Luther, do you really think he had something to do with our father's death?"

Again Luther goes to say something about the previous topic but remembers this was why he was there in the first place."Well, someone had to have done it, and Diego hated him and keeps insisting it was just heart failure."

"Because that is what the coroner’s report said. Pogo would have talked to the coroner as well. If this is some big cover-up by Diego, do you really think he’d have that power? He didn’t even have the power to not get arrested by Patch like yesterday. And for the record, we all hated Dad for something," she states.

"That's not true," Luther says.”Are you really defending Diego right now? You?”

"Luther, you are the only one that thinks that there was any good to Reginald Hargreeves. And I cannot imagine why even you think that. Luther, he left you on the moon, alone, for how long? He put you somewhere even I couldn’t find you. And I tried. Doesn’t that upset you?” She wanted to grab him by his oversized shoulders and shake him, but that seemed ridiculous, so she continued to argue her point. “Look at what he did to us, Luther. He pushed and encouraged Allison to rely on her powers so much that she now is struggling not to use them after they cost her her marriage and custody of her kid. He was downright cruel to Klaus, locking him alone in a dark crypt filled with ghosts until he passed out. He spent so many nights in my room just to survive the nightmares and hell our father made him endure. I spent so much of my life being his personal nightlight, and I will never forget those nights. Or regret them. Same for Ben. And look at Vanya. He treated Vanya terribly like she was no one. No, that implies he saw any of us as people. We were weapons, Luther. Tools. He used us. And do you even know what he did to me? I mean I know what he did to the others because I would watch it all. Just like I did yesterday. I send tiny little pieces of me out there,” she gestures to the world outside of them. “To look after all of you. Do you want to know why? Because Reginald Hargreeves pushed me to it. Got under my skin so that if I don’t know what is going on, then I’m weak. That if you, or them, get hurt it’s my fault for ignoring my gifts. I know he was doing it to not only keep tabs on everyone, to spy. And that wasn’t even half of what he did. Sometimes he pushed just to see how many Wisps I could create, control, and put myself into, knowing full well it not only left my actual body vulnerable, risked stretching myself so thin I might forget to breathe. He knew it messed with my head, my senses. Do you know how overwhelming it is to have your senses being attacked from every direction from multiple perspectives and your mind has to somehow process it all simultaneously while still attempting to fight and protect yourself? It was like my brain was on fire. It was overwhelming, and it hurt. But he still pushed. He’d tell me to move between them faster. Focus better. Fight harder." She shook her head. "And he still expected me to be at breakfast the next morning like my mind hadn't been broken apart and forced back together. Like my senses weren't screaming, overwhelmed, and overstimulated until I thought my head or sometimes my whole body would just explode. I know you cared for him, Luther, but most of us stopped caring for the sake of our sanity. I did. I know V did. And I’m pretty sure Diego did too."

"But you didn't kill him," Luther states.

"No, I didn't,” she replies, her tone even and sure. “Do you need my alibi?"

"No," Luther says. “Even if you let your emotions get the best of you sometimes, you’d have walked away, like in the courtyard. I mean, you haven’t killed Diego yet. That’s saying something. And Diego, well, I wouldn’t put it past him.”

"I haven’t killed you either, and the two of you destroyed Ben’s statue,” she counters.

“It was an accident,” he argues, “And I didn’t want any of that to happen. I just wanted Dad to have a memorial. Someone killed him, and no one seems to care but me!”

“The worst part of all of this is I do care, Luther. I do. I keep telling myself I shouldn’t, but I do. I just don’t see it, Luther. I’m sorry, but do you think dad would really go that easy? Like, without even the slightest fight? No defensive wounds? Diego is trained, but do you really think any of us are that good? This is the man that trained us beyond the point of exhaustion. That wanted us to keep training and fighting even after Ben died.” She turns to the massive form of her brother and made sure he was listening. “Did you stop to think that Dad didn’t want anyone to have his monocle? Maybe he did something with it. That he didn’t want to give Klaus the chance to sell it or give Diego the satisfaction of breaking it? Or maybe he lost it. He was old. I don’t know, Luther. Maybe it was someone, but there has to be an explanation that isn’t Diego killing him. As much of a pain in the ass I think Diego is, I don't think he did. And even if he was going to, which again, I don't think he would, it would have been as soon as you were on the moon and no longer in his way. I don’t think he’d have had the patience to wait this long."

“Well, I’m still going to look around,” Luther says.

“Don’t let me stop you,” she waved him off.

They settle into awkward silence. She had just trauma-dumped their childhood like she was recapping Vanya’s book and then practically spelled out the pain she didn’t let anyone see. It was almost to much for Luther’s mind to handle. So he focused on what he was there to do in the first place. He could deal with his sister later, right? She was never one he needed to worry about. She could fight like the best of them. Gave as good as she got. Sure, he knew she took the losses of their siblings hard. That was clear from the cold blue tone of her once-warm glow. But she would always seem to rally. She kept going. That was just how she was. Most of them were. He tried to shake off any doubt he had while he looks around. Though he did glance over at her as she sits down and summons a Wisp orb. The eerie blue was like the stories Pogo had originally told. Like its namesake. Her namesake. He goes back to looking as she starts shifting it between her hands as if it was a toy, a distraction. He was genuinely glad she had been using it when a knife darted through the air toward him, and she knocks it out of the air with the orb.

"Hey!" Luther shouts.

"I could smell you," Diego tells Luther as he makes his way down the stairs. "And she's about as subtle as a strobe light."

“You could have killed me,” Luther says with a glare.

“If I wanted you dead,” Diego replies, “You'd be dead.”

"Lovely to see you too, brother,” she says, not even bothering to stand up. “I see you managed to stay off the police radar since I left.” “You little-” Diego spat. “You never let me finish what I was saying. And why are you still spying on me? Dad’s dead. You don’t need to fill him in on what I do anymore.”

"Oh please," she chuckles. "As if it was just you. Klaus knows I check in on him. A lot. Luther didn’t seem to care when I told him.” Luther opened his mouth to point out he hadn’t actually said anything like that, but she kept going. “And Klaus was with you. You just happened to be doing the more stupid thing between you two." She was absolutely not going to admit she was watching out for him, more so than the others. She’d take that to her grave if she had to.

"I'm trying to figure out what is going on in this town. It can't be a-"

"Even if it isn't what do you think you can do about it? You're not a cop, Diego. Impersonating one will not end well. I bailed you out once already.”

“I DIDN’T ASK YOU TO!” Diego actually shouts. Because she still wasn’t listening to him. It’s the same argument, just a different day. Luther actually flinched as the normally blue glow around her shifted to a heated red. Even her eyes started to change. But unlike before, or really any time he’d seen her eyes change, the Wisp was nowhere in sight. It was just her. He was starting to think when she said it made her feel like she might explode earlier, she wasn’t exaggerating. He was honestly glad her ire was at least not focused on him anymore. It was focused on Diego. He was starting to wonder how these two survived being at each other's throats all the time. Then again, Luther had also just heard her defend Diego.

"I KNOW BECAUSE YOU HATE ME! I GET IT!" She screamed.

Diego started seeing red at that point, and it wasn’t just his sister’s heated powers. “YOU STILL AREN’T LISTENING! YOU NEVER DO! YOU-”

“Enough!” Luther says. “Whatever this is about, it can wait. Because you keep screaming at each other, one of two things is going to happen. One, people in the gym are going to notice and we all get kicked out. Or two, the Wisp is going set off the sprinklers, or melt something at least.”

Neither Luther nor Diego missed the way the light around her nearly vanished. The rapid shift in lighting meant it took a second for their eyes to adjust. It was like someone threw a bucket of cold water on a campfire on a dark night.

“Why are you even here?” Diego asks. “Both of you.”

“Why didn't you tell me?” Luther asks.

“Tell you what?” Diego counters, annoyed at the vague nature of the question.

“That you were fighting the night that Dad died,” Luther clarifies. “I checked with the guys out there.”

“Well, I shouldn't have to prove my innocence to you…” Diego states then glances at their sister. “Or anyone else in this family.”

“Yeah,” Luther admits. “You're right. But, I just thought that…”

“Yeah. I know what you thought.”

“Do you think I would bail you out if I thought you killed Dad?” She asks once Luther is finished talking. She pulls her jacket tighter around her as the chill of such a temperature shift sets in. “Do you still have that little faith in me?” Her brothers both look at her. “Especially after Five asked me to talk to you.”

“Is that what all this is about, something Five saw?” Luther asks.

“What did Five ask you to do?” Diego asks, it's been a constant question in the back of his mind since she’d bailed him out and had mentioned him.

“To get you to help him, to help us,” she admits.

“Is that why you’re being nice to him,” Luther gestures to Diego. “Because Five asked you to? That actually makes a lot more sense than-”

“You’re both assholes,” she tells them through clenched teeth before storming out.

“What just happened?” Diego looks at Luther.

“Did she ever tell you that using her powers made her feel like her brain was on fire and that she might explode? Or that when she splits off into different Wisps, I guess it’s like having her brain scrambled and then trying to force it back into the shell?”

“What?” Diego just stares at him like he’d grown a second head.

“Yeah, that was news to me too,” Luther says before going to follow her out.

"Told you he didn't do it." Y/N says when Luther finally catches up to her.

"So is it because of Five you’re defending him or what?"

"Yes and no. Yes, Five asked me to try and get everyone on the same page. Five thinks he might need our help. I’m not sure what for, but I guess I’m team prep. And no, because Diego might be an asshole, but he is still our brother, Luther. You’re still my brother, too."

“Do you usually use your powers to follow the others around?” Luther asks.

“Not usually, or at least for a while, I didn’t. I do it from time to time just to make sure everyone’s okay.”

“Even me?” Luther finally just asks.

“Well, I couldn’t reach the moon if that’s what you wanted to know. I mean, I’m not as powerful as the sun. Space is a bit too much for me. But before that, maybe once or twice, outside of Dad’s demands. You’re still my brother, and if I have to live with these stupid powers making me glow like a neon sign, I might as well use them to my advantage.”

“Two things. One, you said it hurts to do that, to split off and have all that stuff coming at your brain, so maybe don’t push. Phones exist, you know that, right?” Luther says. “Two, seems like an invasion of privacy.”

“Please don’t lecture me. I don’t do it much these days like that’s the first time since Vanya’s book came out I’ve followed anyone but Klaus.”

“Why Klaus?”

“Because someone has to. He needs someone to look after him, and we all know he isn’t going to do it himself.”

“Maybe you coddle him too much.”

“You find your brother passed out in a drunk tank, or worse, unconscious on a dirty mattress in a flop house with no one around that cares, and try not to worry.”

“He’s that bad?” Luther asks.

“Yes, Luther. He can get that bad, and sometimes I don’t blame him. If I could take something, a drug, anything, that could make the Wisp vanish and not start glowing like the Vegas strip for a few hours, I would, but I can’t. If I could just leave the Wisp at home and go about my day, I would, but I can’t.”

“You tried that, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, and the only way I can manage that distance is if I split my consciousness, and that’s more of a headache than any hangover.”

“Like your brains on fire, I got that.” Luther grumbles. “You’re not the only one that sticks out in a crowd now.”

“I know, big guy, I know.”

“But maybe just give your brain a break. You don’t have to fry your brain because of us.”

She let out a sad laugh. “I’ll try, but being back at the academy, it’s like nothing changed. I just want to know that everyone is fine. And it's dumb because Diego is right. I started it because Dad made me. I don’t have to do this anymore. But my brain won't let it go. Like I can’t sleep.”

“Maybe we work on that,” Luther states.

“Maybe,” she sighs.

#the umbrella academy x reader #diego hargreeves x female!reader #diego hargreeves x reader #diego hargreeves x you #diego hargreeves x y/n #female!reader #tw: neglect #tw: child neglect #tw: abuse #tw: mentions of death #tw: ghosts #tw: manipulation #tw: depression #tw: violence #tw: physical pain #tw: torture

5 notes · View notes

torchwood-99 · 2 years

Video

Monster Girl

A homage to terrifying women in horror

Movie Clips

Midsommar

Clash of the Titans

Carrie

The Grudge

The Ring

The Woman in Black

Voice Over

Monster Girl

(Poem by Me)

#Horror #my writing #Midsommar #Us #Clash of the Titans #Carrie #The Grudge #The Ring #The Woman in Black #twigger warning #scary #hopefully #tw: horror #tw: ghosts

25 notes · View notes

tiffonacid · 1 year

Text

ghost/human angsty bad ending prompt [tw: memory loss, death by illness]

A ghost who falls in love with someone in their old, old house. However, there’s asbestos* or some sort of similar issue that has grown in the house a long time after the ghost died, and neither are aware of it. The living person starts losing their memories, forgetting things from the simple to entire people. The living person dies due to the illness and becomes another ghost to haunt the house, all the while the original ghost is forced to grapple with the fact that their loved one doesn’t remember them, never will, and it’s all their fault (in their mind, at least) because they were the thing that kept their love there.

*based on a story I heard yeaaaaars ago about a family who started having mental troubles due to living in an infested house (including forgetting things like where they parked their car in the grocery lot and how to get home)

don't remember when or where I heard it, but it stuck with me. looked up if asbestos actually caused memory loss and google said "not directly" so ??

#writing prompt #ghost #tw: death #tw: ghosts #tw: illness #tw: angst #angst #if I need to add more tw tags *please* tell me #tw: loss #tw: grief #ship prompt #tw: guilt #tw: memory loss #story prompt #dementia #tw: dementia #angst prompt #likely inaccurate to how this stuff works uhh #trying to be Very careful about the tws hdhdhfbdn

4 notes · View notes

amusementmidway · 1 year

Text

My son, my FNaF OC, Charles Afton. Twin to Charlotte Afton who I'll inevitably end up rambling about endlessly.

#tw: wounds #tw: ghosts #tw: blood #blood tw #tw blood #tw wounds #fnaf OC #blorbo from my mind #OC #five nights at freddys OC #five night's at freddy's OC #i was listening to the Ballad of Jane Doe so i had brainrot #for real tho Ballad of Jane Doe Slaps

4 notes · View notes

artnrandomness · 2 years

Text

Day 7-Ghost (should've posted this yesterday)

"Ever since Dib had died the moment everyone realized that he wasn't even crazy to begin with, the whole town feared the possibility of his ghost coming to haunt them. They were right the moment it happen, but his ghost didn't just haunt them; Zim and the Membranes were his hauntees, but not more than his remorseful and already traumitized sister, Gaz. Now forever scared with guilt and regret, Gaz is forced to live with the vengeful sadistic wrath of the ghost of her brother."

Based on a recent Invader Zim idea I just had.

#zimtober2022 #zimtober22 #tw: death #tw: ghosts #tw: trauma #invader zim gaz #invader zim dib #invader zim #original idea #my art

4 notes · View notes

plasmaberri · 2 years

Photo

The day is here - and what an interesting one. Dave agreed to go with, yet left immediately as he was not the father. Not to mention the entire hospital was staffed with ghosts - one of Rhosyn’s big fears.

#not so berry gen 2 #the sims 4 #sims generation challenge #sims 4 generations #sims 4 gameplay #not so berry rose #not so berry yellow #tw: pregnancy #tw: hospital #tw: labor #tw: birth #tw: death #tw: ghosts #tw: ghost #tw: pregnant

2 notes · View notes

myriadsystem · 2 years

Text

Any systems out there that have maybe advice or anecdotes about non-corporeal alters, please if you feel comfortable sharing im in a tight spot and could use guidance:

So, I am a ghost. When we were little our hosts had always been human, during our teen years i co-hosted with a human. During our late teens/early 20s i was considered less of a co-host and more of just only being out when we interacted with our abuser, and the human co-host became the only host for a while. Since then that human is no longer host and isnt able to be considered co-host anymore (atleast not for the forseeable future until we get therapy and can unpack some stuff for her) and the role of host falls solely on me. The ghosty hostess with the mostess 😎

So basically tl;dr the first part, ive been in the body fairly often before but its only the last few months i have been here all the time with 'just me' (obv not including random switches/lurking but like i mean in a sense of the body primarily belonging only to me without a break.)

The body deals with a l o t of chronic pain.

Basically i had some thoughts recently where i couldnt tell if i could feel the body pains more these days just because i dont have a co-host/have someone to take it from me when its overwhelming, or because im becoming more connected with the idea of having physicality? Or the pain is just worse/increased because whatever is causing the pain hasnt been medically adressed and my condition has decreased. I have recently stopped taking my uh, 🍀 medication due to financial reasons and since not having it the body just feels worse and worse every day, i honestly didnt realise just how much it was doing for me in regards to just like. Allowing me to go for a tiny 10min slow paced walk without wishing to scream and howl in pain with every step. To let me function, essentially, on a physical pain management scale.

The last two ideas stress me out. I still feel like a ghost, not to get too personal but my ghost form wasnt formed out of a near death experience it was out of a need to have certain words and events 'go through me,' and a deep connected sense of lonelyness and abandonment like those things and people and places who are gone and forgotten. And i carry much trauma related to those feelings which i will not be going into detail about here. But the thought that i have been in this body so long by myself, and have over the last few years found friends and connections to other physical people i want to be around, couldve caused/be causing me to slowly become less ghost and more physically real? That scares and worries me. I still very much feel like i need to be ghost to stop us getting hurt in that way. I worry if i become corporeal, it will be easy for other people to hurt us in that same way again. I worry if i am corporeal that i will have to deal with the bodys physical pains much more intensely than i already do if i am so connected to it, and that i cannot do what i do best to allow painful things to pass through me. Like im made of nothing but smoke because i essentially am. Thats my entire reason for being. I worry if this is the case and im becoming a more physical embodiment of my former self that its out of my control and i dont get a choice. Because i would chose to stay ghost if i could.

The other option is also scary. The body is only 24 years old dude. It shouldnt hurt this much all the time over comparatively small tasks. Or no tasks. It shouldnt hurt this much just to be 'alive'. And if it is because the condition has progressed since the last time i was aware of the body for real and ive gotten worse? Thats almost too much to think about. How quickly is it progressing? Why cant i do anything to stop it? Why wont doctors do anything to stop it, or atleast identify it so i can work on managing it myself? Ive only ever split once (personally i mean not as a system) and the poor entity is full of medical trauma. It makes it so hard to keep going to doctors to keep begging them to take me seriously when they never do. Its so much pain and effort (let alone money) and exhaustion just to get to a doctor. Not even a specialist just a gp. Only for them to tell me every time that i brush my hair and dress nicely and usually wear makeup and i couldn't possibly be struggling in any way, especially physically. Its too much effort, more effort than its worth for that. So i dont really go to a doctor any more, but i need to, i need just one of them to take me fucking seriously. Because i have no good way of knowing if this pain seems so new and intense to me because im more 'real' (physical) than i ever was, or because there is more pain.

Both options suck

So yeah idk any ghostly entities or fluid/non-corporeal/shadow type alters, do you have advice how to tell if you might be becoming physical? Or those of you who used to be floaty who did transition into a more 'sturdy' being, what did it feel like? When did you know you werent the concept of see-through anymore? Do you prefer not having a graspable form? How has this change benefited your sys?

Idk i have a lot of questions just any sort of advice might be helpful here bc im having a rough time lately managing physical body pain in relation to the literal reason i exist and if i still exist like that.

#thats so fkn long im so sorry i so rarely post actual longform stuff on here but ive been thinking about lots lately #plus this is my blog i get to talk about my stuff here. this is my blog i have to keep reminding myself the social rules ive built myself #do not have to apply here. i can be a nuisance on my own damn blog if i wish #im also sorry idk how to do a readmore tho #i tried. i do not know if it will work its the first one ive done and i am on mobile app so im just reslly sorry if it doesnt work #and you get this huge text wall comin at ya #thats a lot of personal stuff i fe a bit weord abt posting so much private stuff openly but i needed to get these thoughts out #in a way where i can maybe get advice without judgement and not just a one sided journaling entry #personal #did #osdd #tw: death mention #tw: abuse mention #tw: drug mention #endos dni #tw: split mention #? idk what to tag as trigger warnings theres a lot of heavy implied stuff here but no actual real details i think #tw: ghosts #gross fuck you if you expect me to tw my fucking self but also. like i get it. i get not everyones cool with ghosts #bc theyre so often linked with deathy concepts #tw: trauma #tw: trauma mention #again not specifically with detail but i just dont wanna upset unprepared folks #next question for myself. if i click dont allow reblogs can people still reply? we will find tf out i suppose #if youre 'endo' you will be immediately blocked upon my finding this out or if youre just a dick about this post or my situation in general #im in a bad place. i have zero fucking tolerance for any kind of hate or even criticism right now. friendly discussions please only #im happy for you to share your stories if you think it relates or you might have insight into my situation #and im asking for advice so unless its very obviously unsolicited or unapplicable to situations like this(airy alters becoming less airy)#please feel free to share whatever you think might help or work within context #system

2 notes · View notes

harveyb-wabbit92 · 2 years

Text

Ghost! Subway bosses haunted Rails au: how it began.

(Ok so is now a thing I guess,) So Ingo and Emmet died there was an explosion in one of the subway tunnels that collapse on top of the train killing everyone inside, the tunnel was too unstable to clear out, so the city had it closed and boarded up and turned the tunnel into a memorial to the Twins and the souls that were lost that day.

However, rumors soon started circulating about the accident, not being an accident, apparently some trainer who was pissed that they lost against the Twins one too many times planned the explosion, Not long after this started sightings of strange apparitions wandering the Gear Station at night were reported in the abandoned tunnels.

Witness swearing it was one of the Trevithick twins! Now the subway became popular again... for a whole different reason, As groups of urban explorers and amateur ghost hunters would break in and try to sneak into the crumbling tunnel intending to catch a glimpse of the spectral conductor.

That's where you come in dear reader, you were never one to believe in such tales.(Shocking considering you were Morty's cousin and all.) You were a realist; a lady of science! And as far as you were concerned ghosts were only a type of Pokémon.

So your theory is that it was just a ghost or psychic type Pokémon that was being used by the city's tourists association to garner more cash flow into the subway. Now that the battle trains were completely obsolete. They tried to keep them running, but it just wasn't the same without their poster boys Ingo and Emmet running the show. So the battle trains were retired and the gear station became a regular subway station.

You were dared by your friends to spend the night in the station and prove it was just as you said; a Pokémon causing the hauntings, So you got to the station 15 minutes before it closed, and hid in the women's washrooms by putting up caution tape and an out of Order sign on one of the stall doors, You stepped inside the stall sat on top of the toilet and waited, ten minutes later the washroom lights went off. You heard the announcement on the P.A. that the station was now closed and to leave.

You heard the guards doing their rounds, one of them came into the woman's room, you watched their feet from the gap under the stall; checking each one before stopping at yours. You held your breath as they stood there for a few moments.

They tried the door to make sure it was really locked then turned around and left, you relaxed and stepped off the toilet, and left the washroom and looked around the dimly lit and empty station, it had a more eerie feeling to it, the shadows felt as if they waiting for you to get closer so it can swallow you whole.

You shuddered suddenly second guessing your decision...Like you were totally trespassing on public property! that's like, what? a 1000 dollar fine and a week in jail?? and not to mention that'll show up permanently on your record that you were arrested!

You nervously spared a glance towards the exit one last time before turning on your flashlight walking down the stairs towards the tunnels...Not realizing you were being watched and followed.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Emmet: "Hey, can't you hear me? you can't be here!" Emmet winced as the y/hc woman walked through him completely oblivious to his presence as the ghostly conductor tried desperately to get her attention.

He saw her hiding out in the washrooms at first he though it was just another ghost not realizing they were dead, he saw her sneak out after the security guard did his rounds, Emmet had called out to her, but the woman seem to ignore him.

Needless to say, Emmet was shocked to learn that she was alive when his hand went through her shoulder, he started following her as she walked down the stairs, Emmet knew he had to make her leave, before it noticed her nosing around!

Emmet looked around for something to throw and scare her away, but got distracted when he saw the woman hop off the platform and walk down the tunnel. "Don't go down that way! wait up!" he hovered after her not realizing how much his unlife was about to change after this night....

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Ingo: "Ma'am, I must insist that that you leave!" Ingo huffed as he followed after the woman trespassing in the station, He kept trying to grab her arm or blocking her way but it was in vain as the woman passed right through him every time, Ingo let out a frustrated growl... all those horror movies Emmet liked to watch lied!

According to them the living should at least feel his presence when he's nearby, but so far no ones acknowledged him once! And that's a big problem! Especially since the situation will become dire if he doesn't get this woman out of the station... before It knows she's here!

Ingo followed the woman down the stair towards the green line platform, the black clad conductor still tried to get her attention as she jumped off the platform and onto the tracks “Arc’s sake!” he hissed following after her, not realizing how much things were about to change for him tonight.

#pokemon fanfiction #pokemon x reader #Submas #ghost subway masters #fem reader #subway boss emmet x reader #subway boss emmet #subway boss ingo x reader #subway boss ingo #monster x human #tw: death #tw: ghosts #haunted rails au

61 notes · View notes