#today was a struggle

[baronessblixen]

Hi ! The doodle art you reblogged with Mulder kissing Scully is so perfect ! Do you think you could write a fic about this ?

I'm not entirely sure but I think the art is THIS POST. It took a life of its own anyway. It's a fluffy post-ep for "Chimera".

Fictober Day 28 | Tagging @today-in-fic @xffictober2022 | Wc: 1,088

Yes, Honey

Mulder unlocks the door to Scully’s apartment, stepping inside with a huge smile. It falls away when he realizes that Scully isn’t standing there waiting for him. For some reason he expected her to be as excited to see him as he is to see her. Instead, there’s only quiet and no Scully. Maybe he should have called her first, reminding her that he had plans to come over once he was back in town.

“Honey, I’m home,” he says, taking off his coat. That must get a reaction out of her. The words sound wrong even to his own ears. He’s made the joke once before. But that was before they were a couple. It reminds him of the domesticity he briefly tasted in Vermont during the Adderly case. It clings to him like day’s old aftershave.

“Scully?” He asks, this time with worry in his voice. She wouldn’t have gone out, knowing he was coming over. Would she? He doesn’t even take off his shoes as he walks through her apartment. She’s not in the kitchen, the living room, or the bathroom. That leaves her bedroom. It’s only late afternoon – she can’t be asleep, can she? The door is ajar and Mulder pushes it open, a smile breaking out on his face.

There she is. She’s in her bed, sleeping diagonally with a book by her side to keep her company.

“Hey, sleepyhead,” Mulder whispers, touching her shoulder gently.

“Hmm, let me sleep,” she mumbles, only half-awake.

“You’re not at all happy to see me?”

“You left me alone on that stakeout,” she says, peeking at him with sleepy eyes. “I had to take two showers, Mulder. Two.”

“I’m sad I missed both of them.”

“It was cold and it was lonely,” she complains and Mulder can’t help but smile at her. She must have put her hair up in a bun after her shower, but a strand has rebelliously snuck out. He tucks it behind her ear, happiness flooding him.

When Ellen asked him about his significant other, he considered telling her about Scully. What difference would it have made? He does have someone. He has Scully. But what she is to him can’t be compromised into two little words or a simple definition.

“The showers were cold and lonely?”

“The stakeout, Mulder.” She crawls out from under the covers, stretching. She yawns and Mulder watches her, amazed that he gets to be here with her. There was no question where he was going to go after landing. And not just because he left his coat with her. Though that makes it the perfect excuse. If she’s going to throw him out, he can just pretend he came for his coat. The way she’s smiling at him, though, he thinks he’s going to get lucky tonight. In more ways than one.

“I missed you,” he admits. “On the case. Working without you is… it’s not the same.”

“Did anything happen?” She asks him.

“Why do you ask?”

“I don’t know,” she says, touching his face. “You look… different.”

“I leave you for a couple of days and you no longer recognize me.” She playfully rolls her eyes at him while her finger journeys over his face, following its contours. “It’s me, Scully.”

“I know it’s you,” she says. “I may have missed you too.” He loves this new version of Scully. It must have always been hidden underneath her suits and her fierceness. Every once in a while, he got glimpses of it. Now he gets the whole thing. A new side of Scully he can’t get enough of.

“Not as much as I missed you.”

“Didn’t know it was a contest,” she says, pinching his nose. He laughs at her and he can no longer just sit here with his hands by his side. He has to kiss her. So he leans forward and does precisely that. She’s as hungry for him as he is for her. She’s pulling him towards her by his sweater and just as he’s about to lie on top of her, she pushes him away.

“What?” He asks, confusion written all over his face. He wipes his mouth, staring at her.

“Why are you still wearing shoes?”

“How did you even notice that? I was worried when I didn’t see you and forgot to take them off,” he says, grumbling. Cockblocked by his own shoes. While he takes them off, Scully gets up from the bed and he groans in frustration. So much for their making-out session.

“I fell asleep,” she said. “Have you eaten? I haven’t eaten yet. How about pizza? What do you wanna eat?” She asks him, watching him with her hands on her hips. She’s wearing casual clothes, his favorite outfit on her. Unless she’s not wearing anything. That will always trump everything.

“You,” he says with a grin, reaching for her. She squeals as he pulls her to him. She crashes into his chest, and both of them laugh.

“I’d like something substantial first.”

“You are substantial to me,” he says, proving his point by holding her face, kissing her everywhere he can reach. Her forehead, her cheek, an ear. He wants all of her. She smells like her shampoo and tastes like herself. He can’t get enough of her. He’s been craving her ever since their first kiss.

He bites gently into her nose, making her giggle harder. The corner of her mouth and she stills in his arms. He can feel her smile against his own lips; taste it, too. He kisses it right off of her, making her moan into his mouth. What Ellen said to him rings through his mind as Scully tugs on his shirt, her hands searching for skin she can touch. This is what he wants. She is a refuge for him. Just as she hopes he’s the same for her. Whether they have the classic, standard run-of-the-mill marriage or not. It’s them.

“You’re thinking too much,” Scully says, teasing his lips with her tongue.

“That’s not something you accuse me of very often, Scully.”

“You owe me dinner, Mulder,” she says, continuing to chase his mouth.

“Anything you want,” he says. Yes, honey, is what he thinks.

“Right now,” she says, pressing a kiss to his jaw. “I want you.”

“What happened to substantial food?”

“Later,” she says, shutting him up with her mouth. “You whetted my appetite. And you owe me this, too.”

Yes, honey, he thinks again, gladly letting her have her way with him.

#fictober2022 #today was a struggle #but can't quit this close to the finish line #msr #xf fanfic #my writing #my fic

[wiggz89]

30 Days of Positivity - Day 7

Today was really tough. I was overwhelmed with too much work to do at work, but I managed to get through it in the end.

On a positive note, I've started to learn another song on bass, and I've nailed the first part!

#personal #bass #sorry this one is so dull #today was a struggle

[panstarry]

my final from last semester that i made into a zine. cooked this one up in a couple hours before the critique (the ink was still wet!), so it's very raw and kind of sloppy but the sentiment is there. i love you trans people of color. we are the backbone of this community 🌟

#pan draws #pan designs #zine #risograph #i'm not gonna lie i don't love how this one turned out OTL and i think the wording is not done but well... a deadline is a deadline #i'll probably touch it up and rewrite it in the future but who's to say.. i need to stew on how to articulate my feelings coherently #anyway my transness is so closely tied to my experience as a person of color. the current political climate is so fucking ass to exist in #but more than anything i am pissed off at white punks & leftists & trans people that refuse to have meaningful solidarity with us. #so yeah anyway. i was stuck on this one forever and only really got anywhere with it after attending 2 punk noise shows in a row where they #actually used their fucking platform to do like. anything. our struggles are connected you need to careeeee YOU HAVE TO CARE........ ok bye #tdov #trans day of visibility #<- i was sitting on uploading this for a while so the stars kind of aligned for it to be today huh.... happy tdov i love you

[cherrytea556]

Heteronormativity and Amatonormativity go hand in hand. You give the opposite sex one compliment then somehow people think you have a crush on them. Talk about complimentless ig.

#aromantic #aro #asexual #ace #aroace #aromantic asexual #aro struggles #ace struggles #aroace stuggles #I called one guy pretty and people assumed i had a crush on him #complimented him on his haircut today iswtg if this repeats again #amatonormativity #heteronormativity

[adarlingmess]

onryo.

#Guess who decided to step out of their comfort zone and experimented today? #I did!!! please pet my head I struggled with the colors so much 😭 #blue eye samurai #mizu #blue eye samurai mizu #onryo #fanart #art #digital art #painting #digital painting #illustration #digital illustration

[todayontumblr]

Thursday, January 4.

Existential Ben Affleck.

Well it's January 4, after all—indeed it cannot be anything else. And nothing quite distills the suffocating existential weight quite like another image of Ben Affleck trying, and failing, to carry out the most menial tasks of the day. There is a little Ben Affleck in all of us.   So once you're done staring at the sad, widening pool of coffee at your feet, come celebrate this gaping abyss of a month with a series of Affleck-inspired gazes into the void.

@batfleckgifs

#today on tumblr #ben affleck #up against it #ben affleck is on the struggle bus #ben affleck coffee #ben affleck smoking.jpg #dunkin donuts #donuts #spillage #misfortune #existentialism #existential dread #existential crisis #existential thoughts #the void

[madootles]

consumed with the urge to draw with ed holding cat. that's all

edit: metal arm wrong side bc canvas flip

#the legs look so fucked to me so cropped version first #edward elric #cat #I cannot explain #is it not self explanatory #probably bad to post this at 1 am my time but my impatience has always been strong and today is no different #fma #fma03 #fullmetal alchemist #fmab #I really struggled with this and I still don't completely love it but I wanted to post something #it's been about a year since I first got BACK into fma #still into it lolol #fan art #anyway life updates... nothing really #I have been listening to hozier's new album for weeks and I saw him in concert which was awesome! #today I saw the PJO trailer and it brought me happiness #sketch #proportions are so fucked like I love edward's build but it really is hard for me to nail down #hope someone enjoys!

[beescake]

i am in love with your sollux i think

sollux love party :]

if you’re interested heres some of my personal fondness thoughts on him.. big warning for the mega long read ahead aye

as we alr know sollux's rejection of participation somewhat mirrors dave's rejection of heroism, but even without getting cooked to completion i still find sollux's character v compelling beyond the fourth wall

as someone who doesnt get a pinch of that Protagonist Sparkle to begin with, he can openly say he wants to leave anytime…. and unlike dave, he actually Can leave the scene anytime. but he can never be truly Free from the story via permanent character death like the other trolls.

his irrelevancy is indeed relevant - he’s there so u can point him out.

while his image is intended to be a relic of past internet subculture, his role is not only about hehehaha being a Chad or a 2000s cyberforum 2²chan haxxor ragequit gamebro.

his continued existence also happens to add a Bit to the overarching themes of homestuck! a Bit that gives him longer-lasting thematic relevance compared to the trolls who could’ve had more character potential but didnt get to survive beyond the main story.

the Bit in question:

his defiance contributes to the illusion of agency (treating characters = people with autonomy). he’s “aware” of it, and that recognition is worth noting enough to forcibly keep him alive as both reward and punishment.

considering how his personality & classpect is designed its definitely a very haha thing for hussie to do LOL. he’s made to be op asf so he's resigned to doing dirty work, gradually deteriorating along the way but never truly dying. as fans have mentioned before, him openly rejecting involvement after a while of grim tolerance is like if the sim u were controlling suddenly stopped, looked up and gave u the finger while u were step six into the walkthrough for Every Possible Sim Death Animation.

but since he’s just a sim… the more he hates it, the more you keep him around. if ur sim started complaining abt your whimsical household storyline you’d definitely keep that little fuck.

but yeah i like that sollux is just idling. the significance of his presence being that one dude who's always reliably Somewhere, root core Unchanged, no individual ambitions (possibly due to fear of consequence?), and design-wise: a staple representative product of his time.

compared to dirk's character, who has aged phenomenally well into the present (themes of control + AR + artificial intelligence, clearer exploration around navigating relationships/sexuality, infinite possibilities of self-splinterhood and trait inheritance), sollux's potential is really... contained. bitter. defeatist. limiting and frustrating in the way old tech is.

the world continues moving on to shinier, brighter, more advanced automated things - minimalist and metaverse or whatever but sollux is still here 🧍‍♂️ going woohoo redblue 3d. (tho personally i imagine his vibe similar to what the kids call cassette futurism on pinterest mixed w more grimy grunge insectoid influences eheh)

conceptually-speaking,

at the foundation of it all, the rapid pace of modern development was built off the understanding of ppl like sollux in the past, who were There actively at work while the dough was still beginning to rise

thats one of the cool things abt the idea of trolls preceding humans! the idea that trolls like sollux excelled back when lots of basic shit still needed to be discovered, building structures like networks and codes from scratch, and humans will eventually inherit and reinvent that knowledge in ways that become so optimized it makes the old manual effort seem archaic, slow, and labour-intensive.

but despite information/resources/shortcuts being more accessible now, much of the new highly-anticipated stuff released on trend still end up unfinished, inefficient, or expiring quickly due to cutting corners under severe capitalistic pressures

meanwhile, some of the old stuff frm past generations of thorough, exploratory and perfectionistic development still remains working, complete, and ever so sturdy.

those things continue to exist, just outside our periphery with either:

zero purpose left for modern needs (outdated/obsolete)

or

far too important to replace or destroy, bcs of its surprisingly essential and circumstantial usefulness in one niche specific area.

which are honestly? both points that sum up sollux pree well.

dramatic ending sorry. anw are u still on the fence or are u Sick abt him like me </3

#ask #anon #sollux captor #homestuck #hs2 spoilers #2023 #vioart #hs2 sollux explaining girls and bitches to john: 🗣️🗣️🗣️ #mr foods‚ setting up the visuals: LMAO ok pause. cool story bro theyre all gone its just u n ur sandwich bro. #now that i think abt it sol's kind of a toaster? awkwardly takes up countertop space #lacks the versatility and sociability of an air fryer/pressure cooker. unwashed and littered w crumbs! #but sometimes the clear‚ frank simplicity of the toaster is a temporary lifesaver for ppl who struggle w low appetite / decision fatigue #or ppl who just have a habit of eating toast for breakfast LOL #and eh ¯\ _(ツ)_/¯ even if u dont feel like toasting today thats ok he's still gonna be sitting there 👍👍 #a funnyman..... i curse him in my pan but root for him in my biscuit 🫶

[chitinleg]

got him off-balance!

#my art #ds9 #star trek deep space nine #julian bashir #elim garak #garashir #watercolor #image desc in alt text #i normally post on mondays but. today im breaking my pattern! getting a little silly. getting a little wild. garashir jumpscare #“tumblr user chitinleg garak would neot easily let himself be swooped off his feet into a hug like that” yes i know BUT! #look at his expression. look at how his arms r pinned. he didnt let this happen LMAO julian just surprised him. grabby huggy human behavior #if you look really closely you can see the tiniest frown in the world on Garak's face. because he's like “EEP !” #cant see bashirs face at all in this only his body but i think we can all imagine that whatevers going thru his head. he needs this hug bad #ALSO. for anyone wondering what the fucked up shadow is that starts at the juncture of the teal sleeve-cap where its set into the armhole #the jumpsuits have a bit of a fold of extra fabric (called an Action Pleat) there which allows for a little more maneuverability of the bod #AND creates a really sleek and flat back panel #because you can see the fabric twists along the side arent grabbing the flat back fabric theyre grabbing the fabric folded beneath it #often times i think about drawing out a dissection of kiras first uniform and this voy era one for other artists to use. bc god knows #i struggled at first to find full body references #they like to shoot ds9 very close to peoples heads. and the camera is so blurry. they smeared butter on that thing. god bless

[randanopterix]

Company issued motorbike

#disco elysium #mars art #Kim Kitsuragi #manifesting situations where Kim gets to Go Fast #the artists struggle is knowing Kim would be very diligent about his gear #but drawing him without it because he would be unrecognizable in it #so just imagine he was feeling crazy today

[u3pxx]

harriet is still the same height but instead she wears those disco platform shoes so she just towers over everything i think

#i struggled so hard drawing harry today i wish i could draw her face better right neow but ach orz #harriet du bois #fem kim kitsuragi #sunnysidedisco #i am so severely art blocked that this took me so many redraws and it took so long too and its not even *that* clean and polished 😔 #this doesnt need to be in the main tag LOL i think i need a dedicated tag for the fem versions but idk what to name it yet hmmmm #genderbend #<- blacklisting purposes #sunnysidedraws #described #id in alt text #disco femlysium

[dvnieldraws]

carnations [q!frubbo]

#my art #artists on tumblr #art #artist #qsmp #tubbo #qsmp art #qsmp tubbo #qsmp tubbo fanart #q!tubbo #qsmp fred #fred qsmp #q!fred #frubbo #qsmp frubbo #penpalduo #excuse the fact that this is ass! i was struggling but i went insane today so i had to draw the #< them lol #ill draw smtg way better and nicer later hopefully. lol. #ALSO carnations mean new love. maybe. idk lol #i think they do at least!

[originalartblog]

Kunikida's 2nd lesson in handling skk: do not leave them alone unattended.

ps: they were already there when they got to their destination.

thank you @ticklinglady for brainstorming the idea with me!!

#i need an entire series of kunikida struggling to deal with two entire adult children #bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bsd fanart #bsd kunikida #bsd yosano #bsd dazai #bsd chuuya #bsd ranpo #bsd kunikida doppo #bsd yosano akiko #bsd dazai osamu #bsd nakahara chuuya #soukoku #skk #nawy's comics #ada!chuuya #ada!skk #when i finished this yesterday i had forgotten what would happen in today's episode #this is just a ranpo in a car kind of day #by publishing this now am i going to get drowned under the new episode hype or #with an edit now because i am booboo the fool and forgot to credit where credit is due

[wardingshout]

Viridian trainers for day 5 of spesilverweek! they are my most beloved but Lance is a cursed character who is impossible to draw or portray in any way to me

#idk what's up with him but I have smth like 20 different scrapped things that contains these 3 #and yet I almost always finish my doodles of just Yellow and Silver.... sorry Lance #he's such a funny guy to me esp as part of this trio I'm sorry I always give up on you #anyway yeah no I'm so late bc I wasn't happy with this so I wanted to draw smth else but I was doing chwismas today and was too tired #so I stayed up late doing nothing... #I so badly wanted to shit on Green's dumb cape too (affectionate) #spesilverweek #pokespe #pokespe silver #my art #pokespe yellow #pokespe lance #I'm just gonna tag everyone like that I guess #anyway I feel like having a Viridian trainers prompt was a gift to my soul but I rly struggled I'm so sorry guys one day... #pokemon

[aro-bird]

Okay, for aro awareness week, I need you all to start recognizing that:

NOT EVERYONE IN THE ARO COMMUNITY IS FROM THE UNITED STATES OR EUROPE.

Please, when we're having discussions about aphobia, allonormativity amatonormativity, and other issues for the love of god STOP PRETENDING THAT WE DON'T EXIST AND LISTEN TO US!

We aren't just your token aros that exist in the other side of the world just for you to prove that we are everywhere or whatever point you're trying to make, we are living, breathing human beings and members of the aro community and we deserve respect and to be remembered not as a point in your discourse but as equals.

I am sick and tired of people just assuming that everyone in the community is either from the United States or Europe and only centering those voices in the discussion. We exist too.

#mayaposts #aro #aromatic #aro awareness week #aromantic awareness week #aro awareness week 2024 #aroallo #aroace #arospec #filipino aro #asian aro #poc aro #sorry this came about after someone replied to me saying that not everyone can afford necessities with one income and that rent is too #expensive these days with ''just move to less expensive cities like amsterdam or london and get a full time job'' and it PISSED ME OFF #mind you it was a discussion on why aroaces (who may not have partners or roommates) struggle in today's economy #the other person was not only dismissive of the op who was explaining the frustrations of needing to work multiple jobs to stay afloat #but also trying to just dismiss the struggles of single income people (in this case non-partnering aroaces) #and the implication that we should just ''move out of london and amsterdam and get a full time job'' to be able to afford rent #is such a privileged european/american take #sorry im ranting now lol im just peeved off #i dont even know if the other person was aroace at all tbh but whatever

[jamiesfootball]

Times I feel like writing:

10 minutes before falling asleep

in the shower

20 minutes before I have to go to work

when there is a cat asleep on top of me and moving is illegal

at work

in meetings

in traffic

#writing struggles #today's first struggle is cat