#this is gonna be pure crack

[ghost-bxrd]

Stony silence rings from the other end of the line, but Jason knows Bruce is listening. Listening and running through several possibilities of how someone could have gotten this number while simultaneously tracking the call signal.

This is gonna be fucking gold.

Time to sell it.

“Dad,” he sobs, pitching his voice until it breaks, teeth chattering exaggeratedly, “Dad, please, I’m scared, I-“ Jason cuts himself off with a scream and another series of sobs, “Please, I can’t— it’s locked! Please, no, Dad, it’s locked—“

A sharp intake of breath, the dull thump of something heavy colliding unexpectedly.

“Dad!” Jason cries, calling upon every single drama class he’s ever had, “Please… please- it’s almost to zero- please, I’m sorry, please, please, it hurts so much-“

Bruce breaks.

“Jason, Jason, hold on Jaylad, hold on, I will find-“

Jason smashes the phone against the marble dress of the creepy angel standing guard over his grave. The pieces vanish into the wet grass, like an occult offering eaten by Gotham’s soil.

Then Jason turns and walks away with a gleeful little smile.

But not without flipping the stupid angel off one last time.

— Grave Pretender sneak peek

#snippet #silly little one shot #this is gonna be pure crack #and comedy #jason todd #batfamily #bruce wayne #dick grayson #batfam #robin #tim drake #fic #fic rec #fanfiction #sneak peek #preview #red hood #Batman #Nightwing #batdad #pranks #pranks that go too far

[hal-in-the-family]

Are the machine-likes being told that they have no soul?

...Been there, done that.

#the part time ufo (jobski) #dash commentary #UFO DIDN'T GET PAID ENOUGH FOR THIS (crack - part time ufo) #((Well technically Jobski IS actually a living being but they were lied to about being purely machine since ever.)) #((Slowly inching back here. though maybe I'm gonna need a refresher on my own stuff))

[todayisafridaynight]

STOP I OVERPLAYED ODE TO JOY WHILE LEARNING PIANO 😭😭😭😭😭

However! I am happy to share and am so glad you see the vision. Sorry In Advance to you and all your followers for the spam but here is a (mostly corrupted) office tour (please note the "Mine Power"-brand gym equipment):

P.S. I recall really liking The Wings of the Kirin, please enjoy!

EVERYONE OVERPLAYED ODE TO JOY GROWING UP IT CAME WITH YOUR PARENTS FORCING YOU TO LEARN THE PIANO LERKJALEKJ

BUT OH MY GOD NO DON'T APOLOGIZE THIS IS LITERALLY PERFECT I thank you again for my life this is so important to me you have no idea

#fave #snap chats #'parents' more like my mom. #BUT YEAH I PLAYED ODE TO JOY ALL THE TIME GROWING UP TOO ITS WHY I HAD A STROKE AT THE END OF Y7 VLKALVJLK #getting the sims just to make mines apartment brb. fr tho why the fuck dont i have the sims thats Architecture Simulator #but more importantly i have a sick obsession with having the layout to buildings #i havent posted any of them but i have a bunch of sketches of various rooms/buildings in the RGG series #i dont imagine many people would want to see those so thats why i have them hoarded #obvi i ref them when drawing stuff but theyre also just fun to draw.... #THIS type of stuff is BEYOND valuable to me tho this is my crack. my cocaine even. i live for shit like this #my dad used to be involved with architecture and real estate so i'm gonna blame him for that #BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY im saving all of these theyre so so so important to me i cant thank you enough #im sure others will greatly appreciate these as well #even if it's a bit 'corrupted' i can definitely DEFINITELY salvage these #im going to laugh if he has his own gym equipment brand. is that what his company's done this entire time #was his 'research' just gettin fuckin yolked Cant Believe This #i wonder if mine has a bedroom somewhere though i cant imagine it being in the same room as the piano. unless rich people do that. #theres just so much dead space in that area aside from the piano and it looks like to be a pretty sizeable room.. PURELY just The Piano Roo #like its fuckin luigis mansion over here. not impossible i guess. very strange thing to have. esp if its connected to the GYM #its not even in connected to the main part of the office where you can realistically be like 'lets go into the next room for piano' #you gotta cut through the gym first bro what the fuck is this #but what are those closet-esque bits behind the piano? unless im blind. what purpose would you have to put a closet in a piano room #if its sheet music you keep that under the chair or something #even through the mesh it still looks like those lead to a skinny hallway... idk im rambling #ill study these more in depth later BUT THANK YOU AGAIN #OH BUT i'm about halfway through the movie so far and im def enjoyin it ! #i always like it in crime shows/movies where the answer seems Obvious at first but then as the case goes on its like #Oh God Wait. Hold On Let's Double Check #again i'm halfway through the movie but i always love it when i feel uncertain about the situation ☠️☠️ #it's just fun watching all the pieces come together so yeah im def enjoyin !

[racke7]

So, a long while back I found an author with some interesting world-building ideas. They'd maybe slip into "crack"-territory a bit too often for me to recommend it, but like... I didn't really mind it that much? And they'd written a LOT, so I was running high on that "fics to read"-energy.

Then, a few weeks ago, I came across a scene and-... And it made me start thinking about "the underlying values" of the author. Not in the sense of "they're secretly a Republican" (thank god), but in the sense of an (in hindsight) hilariously blatant feeling of heteronormativity.

Yeah, they didn't write X character as gay, but that's no need to point fingers (canon doesn't call him gay, so it's fine). And okay, maybe they created a crack-ship for one of their fics that they got heavily invested in and are now reusing, but like... it's convenient for plot-reasons so knock yourself out? And maybe leaning heavily on "women are mysterious" for cracky dad-jokes is in bad taste, but it's a cracky kind of scene?

But... it just keeps coming. They've basically gone out of their way to create ships everywhere, and they're all straight? And it's constantly played as a "and they make each other better people" as if they need romance to become such. The people who aren't in relationships are being pushed to become romantically involved (because it will make them better people), and the narrative thinks that this is reasonable and well-meaning (despite the threat of a literal war at their doorstep).

Combined with some comments from the author about being very dismissive about people who don't think marriage is important, because they actually "can't get married" and are crying sour-grapes about "not wanting to get married"?

And then on top of that, the reoccurring harem-plots? Where one dude gets lots of girls, with maybe a tiny little bit of Les-Yay thrown into the mix?

It made me sit back and really look at their stories, and... it's kind of painful? Like, I was curious about their fics, and now it's just-... How can I trust them to write interesting things, if their feelings on "romance" (which often plays an integral part in their stories) is the single most boring vanilla-ass shit that I've ever encountered (from someone who wasn't an insane Republican)?

#i won't name names - but like... it's frustrating to see so much interesting world-building thrown in the trash #all bcs the author doesn't want to question their own culture and the influences it has on them. #i'm not gonna say ''gay is better'' but like... at least those ''look how gay we are lol'' aren't pushing an agenda we see EVERYWHERE ELSE #and that's kind of the important part. that they question SOMETHING about how society functions. instead of quoting hollywood-bs back at me #i still won't read them (for the same reason i avoid ''pure crack''-fics) but like plz stop making literally EVERYONE straight #plz have them go ''i could imagine falling in love - but i have a career to focus on - so maybe later'' #plz have them get into relationships that MAKE THEM WORSE. enablers and obsessions and just regularly toxic mayhem #plz have them go ''i could be straight - but i'm just gonna trans my gender first so that it becomes gay'' #plz have them be DIFFERENT from other characters in the same fic. instead of having every relationship be the same. #writing #fandom #rants #personal stuff #gender #sexuality

[coreius]

Tag drop 1.

#[ ooc. ] you can call me anytime. i'll put you on hold. i like to watch the line blink. #[ ic. ] you experience things. then they're over and you still can't explain 'em? gods. aliens. dimensions. i'm just a man in a can. #[ answered: ooc. ] you have reached the life model decoy of tony stark. leave a message. / it's urgent. / so leave it urgently. #[ answered: ic. ] sir. agent coulson of s.h.i.e.l.d. is on the line. / i'm not in. i'm actually out. #[ psa. ] obviously you can quote me on that. 'cause i just said it. #[ saved. ] what am i even tripping for? everything's gonna work out exactly the way it's supposed to. i love you 3000. #[ memes / prompts. ] if there's one thing I've proven it's that you can count on me to pleasure myself. #[ crack. ] i don't want to harp on this but did you like the custom rabbit? / ... did i like it? / nailed it. right? #[ et cetera. ] actually he's the boss. i just pay for everything and design everything. and make everyone look cooler. #[ self promotion. ] you know; it's moments like these when i realize what a superhero i am. #[ other promotions. ] i told you: i don’t want to join your super-secret boy band. #[ visage. ] 'mr. stark displays compulsive behavior.' in my defense. that was last week. #[ robert downey jr. ] i take some pride in representing myself exactly how i would like to have my son remember me to his kids. #[ meta. ] i should put it in a lockbox and drop it to the bottom of the lake and go to bed. / but would you be able to rest? #[ mini study. ] you start with something pure. exciting. then come the mistakes. the compromises. we create our own demons. #[ essence. ] it's not about me. it's not about you either. it's about legacy. the legacy left behind for future generations.

[secret-bug-pain-blog]

half the time we write things it's because we look at the selection of What's Available For X Thing and because it sucks ass, we go "FINE, we'll do it ourself" and that's at its core why we write for bug fables

#we mean no offense to the vast majority of bug fables writers #but we are REALLY tired of cracking open the ao3 tag and literally the first line its 'he would not fucking say that' #we do whumpy stuff bc we enjoy it! however we really really feel that our characterization needs to Work #because if it DOESN'T match the characterization then why tf are we writing for these characters #we have One Specific Work that we dislike specifically bc we feel it falls too much into the trap of like #making the whumper and whumpee basically just The Same Personalities #we are still gonna post it ofc but we dont like it that much and we're only delaying until art gets done #we are always improving! blessing and a curse in one compact package #bc it means unfortunately some stuff we make will suck #misc. #my posts #writing #bug fables #anyways if we cannot nail down mothivas personality in a satisfying enough way to make her seem In Character #when shes a whumpee in a situation where shes highly predisposed to start fawning #then we will die. and then we'll have to do it better next time bc like fuck if we're giving up #so we're gonna make her act more like an asshole in the beginning bc thats how she Acts under stress #and then have that abrupt fakey turn to fawning in presence of an authority figure #hopefully this turns out right bc if it doesnt we Will die and it Will be this that kills us #smth smth we can't just get into and make content for things that are Purely Good its got to suck a bit #so we can get off our ass enough to go 'you're a fucking idiot and im writing this myself'

[meadowlarkx]

every day i see good and fun posts and like them to rb later and by the time later arrives reblogs have been turned off :(

#anyway i was gonna tag that fluid sexuality post abt how my friend who ided as lesbian like #had a sexy dream abt a guy #simply texted the guy and started hooking up with him #and i am like still retroactively in awe (this was months ago) at how easy every part of this was for her #it needn't be hard! it can just be seeking out what you like! #thinking of all the time i once spent soul searching alone trying to taxonomise myself right bc what if i just 'wanted to' be into girls #the most miserable time!! and for what? #my roommate is in dnd in the other room and i just heard her (character) say the words 'there's nothing impure about sex' lmao. #gods r truly speaking ON-TOPIC #also i wish i could reblog the yaoi/yuri world lhod post bc it cracks me up but i guess it was a post too good for this world too pure #my posts

[kxllerblond]

ok i admit it fine i haven't watched lala land because i know it's going to remind of a silly goofy pining hEALING clark who has managed to allow himself to be vulnerable and experience natural loss without going apeshit and im barely holding onto his evil nasty villain shit as it is ok there i sAID IT!!!

#listen he is in his healing era technically so honestly buckle up #he's always gonna be a little gray man who does bloody little murder and tax fraud things but dont be surprised if you see him like #dipping more into Good side of things or see the soft showing thru the cracks ok #sorry besties Hurt and Purely Mean era clark was like. 2016-2021 you just missed it #(;shitpost) #even just watching silly little edits is dangerous because then my mind starts to wander besties #hi welcome to my blog we will be exploring themes of loss of innocence. coming back wrong. and then slowly picking up the pieces even #though they cut ur hand and you know you'll never be able to put them back how they were 100% :')

[betawooper]

bro this trans sen oneshot chapter is going to be a million words long when im finished with it

#just impulsively decided to write her girl dream scene and thats already 1.6k #this is like 1/4 of the whole thing #brooooo its gonna be so long #its gonna be pure serotonin but its gonna be so longggggggg #seriously though i am enjoying it #and how clueless tanjirou seems to be during the entirety of it #he sees sen freak the fuck out about getting her egg cracked and is like 'thats rough buddy but i literally cant help you' #i also just realized that this oneshot would technically be mitsuris second official appearance #its just the dream version of her but sens got her pretty accurate to her normal disposition #i love mitsuri #i want to hug her #kny plot rewrite

[sunnibits]

I am feeling soft about Stizzy again on this night my friends

#also steddyhands in general but like. stizzy is so so good #I know this is gonna sound weird. but I think it’s very pure but also in a not pure at all way #like. ok here’s my thought #yes izzy hates stede with an utter passion yes he tried to kill him like twice or three times BUT #I still feel like stizzy is WAY healthier and like more lighthearted and fun as a potential idea versus like. the Izzy/Ed part of steddyhand #if that makes sense?? #like murder attempts we can get over but I feel like Ed and Izzy are both so toxically codependent that they rlly just need to go their #separate ways #but like stizzy on the other hand?? #pure guilt-free fun. nothing to worry about. silly crack ship but not rlly a crack ship #enemies to lovers goodness. #such delights. #anyways that got deep but I love them <3 they are so funny to me

[kleftiko]

❦ HOW TO GIVE HEAD

cw: mature, sexual content, blowjobs, swearing

here are the tips i give my friends so that they get 10/10 sloppy top ratings

"baby~" you coo from beside him on the couch.

the corner of choso's lips lift slightly in response, but his eyes still focus on the screen of his phone.

"babe~" you call again. "cho~"

although your voice is the most beautiful sound he's ever heard in his life, your boyfriend grants you mercy and finally answers you.

"yes, baby?" he asks softly, eyes not leaving his phone but the small smile still on his face. he can't see the beautiful, but maniacal, grin on your lips.

"teach me how to give a blowjob~"

the tendons in his hand tighten, nearly cracking the poor device between his fingers. besides his entire body going rigid, his eyes lock onto yours, only to nearly lose himself in the look of lust in your gaze.

"y-you can't just ask that shit with a smile on your face!" your boyfriend sputters, cheeks and neck blooming with a harsh blush.

"but who else am i supposed to ask?" your question is just too pure and innocent for the look in your face, and yet, choso can't help but fall victim to you.

"fine, just-fine." he takes a tense breath before saying "sit."

with a little too much enthusiasm, you kneel on the floor between his legs, hands gently resting atop your thighs. you look like a doll to him, so eager to please and so pretty that his cock would twitch even if he didn't know what was going to happen next.

he runs a hand over his face.

"fuck, baby, don't look so eager." his deep voice is muffled behind his fingers.

you giggle. "can't help it."

"'kay, now—um—fuck." choso pinches his nose for a second, gathering his own courage to say, "you're gonna need, like, a lot of spit." while he speaks, your fingers dance across the waistband of his sweatpants, littering his v-line with goosebumps as you free his half hard cock from his boxers.

"it needs to be messy, yea?" you look up at him and lick your lips, coating them with a shine that.

he nods silently, jaw clenched.

"t-then, you're gonna wanna -fuck!" you don't let him finish when you take a lick against his tip. the rough texture of your tongue dulled by the coating of saliva you gathered across it. as you continue to pleasure him, he lets out a low groan of satisfaction, his grip tightening on the edge of the couch. the intensity in his eyes tells you that he's enjoying every moment, encouraging you to take him further down your throat.

"fuck." he whines, taking note of your comfortability, just like always. "breath through your nose."

your head bobs up, taking a breath through your nose now that your throat is clear. swirling the tip of his cock with your tongue, you tease him with slow, deliberate strokes. his hips buck involuntarily, a desperate plea for more. the taste of his precum on your tongue only fuels your desire to please him further.

"the tip-the tip, baby." your tongue pays special attention to the slit at the top of his pretty dick that's leaking absurd amounts of precum, and your boyfriend squeaked out a small, "yes, fuck."

as you continue to focus on pleasuring him, you eagerly comply with his request, intensifying your attention on the sensitive tip of his throbbing member. the combination of his desperate pleas and the taste of his precum drives you to further explore and satisfy him, ensuring his pleasure remains at the forefront of your mind.

"b-balls."

your manicured hands cup his balls. you gently massage and caress them, feeling their weight in your palms. the soft moans escaping his lips encourage you to continue, as you use the pads of your fingers and palms to fondle them.

"oh fuck."

it feels like a shame to waste your nails, so with one of them abandoning your boyfriend's sensitive balls, it creeps up to his v-line. You trace teasing circles along his v-line, feeling the shivers of anticipation ripple through his body. the combination of your delicate touch and the sensation of your nails grazing his skin heightens his arousal, making him tremble with desire.

the combination of all your minstrastions causes choso to buck against you, whimpering out obscenities as he jumbles out a warning of going to cum.

"fuck!" he whimpers as your lips release him.

spurts of cum fly into the air, landing in splats across choso's thighs, pants, and your hands as you lazily jerk him off.

the fucked out expression on his face and the mess he made of himself all because of your doing just made you crave him even more, so with one last move, you gave his angry, red, tip a soft lick, nearly causing him to cry in ecstasy.

when he calmed down, he gave you a look.

"you've done this before."

#jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kaisen choso #choso kamo x you #choso kamo smut #kamo choso x reader #choso kamo x reader #kamo choso smut #choso smut #choso x reader

[fairy-angel222]

step daddy toji fucking you after inspecting your pussy to make sure you aren’t fucking any boys ^^

Step daddy! Toji makes sure his girl is all sweet n innocent f’ him. Putting her on a strict no boys rule that she follows obediently. After all, all she needs is her daddy.

When she comes home from college he smiles widely, placing a sweet kiss to her lips when her arms barely wrap around his torso in a hug.

His lips trail down to your ear with a hum, asking you about your day and school. The man rubbing loving circles on your thigh as you ranted about your day.

“And you didn’t let any boys touch you right?”

“Nuh uh, only you can touch.”

Your words make him smirk, especially as it’s accompanied by a smile and the bat of your lashes.

“Good girl,” he lifted you off his lap, setting you down on your back before letting your legs fall onto his shoulders. “But daddy’s gotta see for himself yeah?”

You nodded, Toji flipping up your skirt to kiss up the inside of your thighs. Pressing his lips lightly to your clit through the fabric of your panties. You shivered at his touch, hips arching into him with a small whimper.

Toji discarded your underwear, groaning at the sight of your folds sticky with your wetness. Using his fingers to spread them apart for strings of slick to still connect both sides together.

His cock twitched, hardening in his pants when he brought his face down to lick a long stripe up your slit. Large hands holding you into him tightly when he began to eat you out. Tongue swirling your sweet taste into his mouth making you moan loudly.

His finger prodded at your hold, a satisfied grin making its way to his face when he concluded that you really were his good girl. So nice n’ tight.

“See d-daddy? All yours— nngfh, all f’ you,” you mewled, Toji bullying his fat fingers into your tight pussy. Curling them up while sucking on your clit.

“Mmm, such a good girl baby. Keeping her so nice n’ wet f’ me.” He breathed, tongue skillfully working your heat until you’re letting out shaky cries, smaller hands gripping his hair tightly.

Your eyes pooled with tears as you’re taken impossibly closer to the edge. Toji speeding up the pace of his fingers while flicking the sensitive bud harshly with his tongue.

Your back arched with the curl of your toes, hips jerking away from his hot mouth with a choked mewl. Feeling your wetness traveling down your ass and onto the couch below you, making a mess between your thighs as he sloppily lapped it all up.

“Nngfh— daddy, so good— feels so good.” You moan, Toji’s grip on your thighs tightening when your legs began to shake. The large man keeping them locked around his head as he buried his face deeper, preventing you from absentmindedly running away from him with a low growl.

“That’s it baby, take it all yeah? Just stay there like a good girl and take it f’me. Don’t run from daddy.” You nodded with a whimper, unable to help the way your body jerked away from his writhing tongue. “S-sorry,” you squeak out, Toji’s eyes darkening when he glanced up at you.

His hand landed meanly onto your clit, cock throbbing at the cracked scream that left your mouth as you cried so adorably. Letting out little babbles in the nearing of your orgasm.

“Daddy— nngh, daddy ‘m so close. So, so, so close. ‘M gonna cum d-daddy— ‘m gonna ahh—” you came with a high pitched cry. Gushing uncontrollably onto his tongue as you were held down firmly. Unable to escape the overstimulation when he continued licking at your clit.

“So fucking sweet, gonna stuff that pretty pussy so full of my cock. Deserves it for staying so pure for her daddy.”

Your pussy clenched at his words. Toji flipping you onto your hands on knees, cock freed from its confines as your needy pussy dripped messily. The pink heart shaped butt plug sat snug inside you as you whined. “P-please daddy— put it in.” Moving your supple hips from side to side in want.

“You’re so greedy baby, want daddy’s cock that badly huh? I see you even kept my gift in all day.” he hummed, spreading your soft ass in admiration of the toy’s shimmer under the light. Toji grabbed hold of the end, slowly twisting it out of you before thrusting it back in. The sensation pulling a string of breathy moans past your lips as your hands trembled underneath you.

“P-please.. need it so bad.”

“Your wish is my command baby.” Toji’s cock rubbed up and down your soaked folds. Prodding at the small hole with a groan, hands finding their way onto your hips when he bottomed out inside you. Your tight pussy stretching to accommodate his girth with a loud mewl. Feeling his hips land flush against the underside of your thighs.

Toji’s hips wasted no time in slamming into you, his hand trailing up the deep arch of your back before twisting into your hair. Pulling you up against him with a grunt. “Shit baby, so fucking snug f’ daddy. Pussy’s gripping me like she needs me— doesn’t want to ever let me go isn’t that right?”

You nodded with heavy breaths, glassy eyes blurring your vision as you moaned loudly. The sound of Toji’s skin on yours echoing throughout the room lewdy. “D-daddyy— ahh, feels son perfect. Love your cock so.. haah— so much,” your voice went up a pitch, Toji’s tip poking at your g spot as his cock glided against slippery walls.

His hand snaked around your neck, squeezing the sides tightly as he rammed up into you, fucking his cock deep into you till it bulged lightly against the skin of your belly.

“My good girl, taking daddy’s cock so well,” he praised, tightening his grip on your neck before kissing your cheek softly, allowing your head to fall back onto his shoulder as his cock pierced your insides deep. “C’mon baby, tell me. Who owns this pretty pussy?”

“Y-you. You do daddy.”

“Hmm, and who’s allowed to touch you here baby. Allowed to fuck you like this.”

“You. Only y-you— ahhh.” Your body trembled as you neared your high, Toji’s breath hot on your skin as his breathing sped up. “And should my baby ever let some dirty boy touch my pussy?”

“N-no, she shouldn’t. And, nngh— she won’t. I belong to y-you.”

“Good.” He bent you back down, broad chest still flush against your back when he groaned. The position allowing him to rock your body at whatever speed he liked, cock pressing against the tear shaped plug with each thrust.

You let out a whiny cry, his cock drenched in your slick as he rolled his hips into you. “Daddy, ‘m close. G-gonna cum.”

“Gonna make a mess f’ me just like daddy taught you to?”

“Uh huh, ‘m always so messy f’ you,” you let a string of cry-like moans drip from your tongue, teary eyes rolling back with the shake of your body. Lips parted in a broken sob of pleasure as you fell apart.

“That’s it baby. There we fucking go- look so damn pretty like this.” He grinned widely when you babbled dumbly, chest heaving in pants as you squirted onto his cock. Drenching his thighs in the juices of your sopping pussy.

“F-fuck,” Toji cursed, thrusts getting sloppy as he slowed his pace. Lodging his cock completely inside you as he twitched within your walls. “Gonna fill you up real nice.” He dragged out, cum eventually pumping into you in thick spurts, painting your insides in the sticky white substance.

He pulled out of you, seed seeping out of your pussy when you clenched at the new found emptiness. Toji’s cock leaving a small gape as your hole fluttered in longing for him to come back in.

You sighed in content, Toji kissing you gently with a smirk. “Did so well baby.” Running his thumb along your plump bottom lip, “how about daddy run you a bath so we can sit n’ relax together hmm?”

You nodded in agreement, burying your face into his chest with a hum. “Sounds.. nice.” Your tired eyes struggling to stay open when a small smile graced your face. “Love you daddy.”

“Love you too sweet girl.”

#jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #toji fushiguro x reader smut #toji x reader smut #toji fushiguro smut #toji fushiguro x reader #toji smut #toji x reader #toji fushiguro #toji fushigro x reader

[atlasishere]

I feel like people need to actually stop me from creating so many crossovers

This is about my bungo stray dogs and the magnus archives crossover

#bungou stray dogs #the magnus archives #atlas talks #atlas speaks #it originally gonna be pure crack with some plot but then I decided to add some angst #and now I am sad over them

[rafeandonlyrafe]

easter day

words: 1.3k

warnings: 18+ only, smut, dad!rafe, mom!reader, fluffy and cute, talk of pregnancy, p in v sex

“when are they getting here?” rafe questions, hands on your hips, leaning over your shoulder to look at the counter where you're finishing frosting the sugar cookies with various pastel colors.

“uhh…” you glance at the clock. “any minute now.” you set down the piping bag as you finish the last detail and turn to look at rafe, changing your voice to a whisper. “are all the eggs hidden?”

“yup.” he nods. “and i already told harper that the small blue ones are for her brother so to let him get the easy ones. the easter bunny told me specifically.”

“smart.” you chuckle, letting rafe pull you in and press your lips together.

“i do just have one complaint.” rafe says, hands moving from your hips to grip your bum. 

“and what would that be?” you look at your husband, one eyebrow raised.

“this dress.” rafe shakes his head. “you look too good in it, you're practically begging me to put a third kid in you.”

“not until elijah is two, remember?” you remind rafe.

“he's 18 months, that's practically two!” rafe lies through his teeth, his grin turning mischievous, knowing just how big of a difference six months can make in a baby's development.

“ill tell you what…” you run your hands up rafes chest. “why don't we sneak away when my parents get here? you know they act like we don't exist anyways.”

you can't blame them, harper just turned 5 and is a handful, which is only added to by elijah. while he's an angel, he's still a toddler and will get into anything and everything if you turn your back for even a minute.

“sounds perfect.” rafe gives you another kiss as harper runs into the kitchen, elijah still distracted in the corner in his bouncer.

“mommy!” she squeals, launching herself at you. you pick her up and easily turn her so she's on your hip. “mommy, mommy.” she continues. “the easter bunny came! i saw eggs in the backyard!”

“oh, yay!” you bounce her slightly as elijah giggles, reacting to harper's excitement. rafe heads to the bouncer and lifts him out.

“and look, mama made cookies.” you show her the frosted sugar cookie eggs and baby chicks. “and i left a couple unfrosted for you to do with grandma and grandpa!”

harper lets out another squeal and wiggles excitedly. “elijah, gammy and gamps are coming over!”

rafe chuckles at her mispronunciation. it started when she was first learning to talk and their names haven't changed since, even elijah calling them their nicknames.

there's a knock at the door and harper wiggles out of your arms to run towards the front, quickly followed by you and rafe, who unabashedly checks you out as harper opens the door to your parents.

“harper!” your mom steps in, wrapping her in a big hug, completing it with pressing kisses all over her face.

“and there's my little man.” your dad takes elijah from rafes arms, whose happy to give him up, itching to get that alone time with you.

you quickly usher your parents in, showing them the unfrosted cookies and other activities to keep your kids attention. 

“rafe and i are gonna go finish their easter baskets.” in truth you've had their baskets finished for a week now, but there's no reason for them to know that.

“okay, that's fine dear.” your mom says, barely glancing to you as harper grabs a butter knife covered in pink frosting.

you grab your husband's hand, and he practically sprints up the stairs, pulling you right along with him into your bedroom.

“god, you knew this would happen didn't you?” rafe questions, hands gripping at your dress, pulling it up as he backs you up towards your bed, keeping the door slightly cracked so you can hear if anyone comes up the stairs. “you know i can't resist this dress.”

you keep your sundresses at the front of your closet, wearing them whenever you find a reason to, purely because of how rafe reacts to them.

“stop talking and hurry up.” you chastise rafe, fingers swiftly undoing the buttons of his crisp shirt until your hands can delve in and feel his muscles.

“yes, ma’am.” rafe smirks, lowering you onto the bed as his lips find yours again, fingers coming to your underwear to feel the wet spot that has started to form. his fingers swipe over the material until you’re moaning quietly, eyes shut.

“god, need to get inside you.” rafe groans, standing to undo his shorts and grab a condom from the nightstand as you take your underwear off, tossing them in the general direction of your hamper. 

you use the moment of silence to listen, seeing if you can hear anything coming from downstairs, but all seems to be calm as rafe pulls your hips to the edge of the bed, lining up his cock with your entrance.

rafe sinks in slowly with a low groan as you gasp, gripping the bed sheets. its been far too long since you’ve been able to have a moment alone like this.

“so good, mama.” rafe wraps your legs around his hips as he begins to move, thrusting in and out of you, thumb already rubbing over your clit, knowing you both need to cum and get downstairs as soon as possible.

“yeah, feels good.” you whine, covering your mouth with your palm as you let out noises, rafe always able to get the sounds out of you even when you should be quiet.

rafe moves faster, cock pushing at your walls, stretching you open for his length.

“shit.” rafe groans. “we need to convince your parents or aunt wheezie to take them for a weekend.”

“mmm, that’s exactly what we need.” you nod. you know that you’d probably end up pregnant again if you had an uninterrupted weekend with rafe, you already feel the urge to reach down and pull the condom off of him, but the thought of dealing with elijah at his current age while pregnant has your mind clearing quickly.

“or we can start sending elijah to daycare once a week.” rafe says, glad that the conversation is helping quell his orgasm somewhat, not wanting to burst inside of you too early.

“fuck, whatever it takes to get more of this.” you push at rafes stomach. he takes a step back as you flip over on the bed, toes touching the floor as you turn onto your stomach.

“god, i wanna marry you all over again.” rafe pushes quickly back insides, thrusts now speeding up as his hands grip your ass, squeezing it and watching the way it jiggles with every thrust.

you push your hand below your body to touch your clit, rubbing it in pace with rafes cock pushing inside of you, pressing your face into the mattress to drown out your noises.

“gonna cum, baby.” rafe warns, cock swelling inside of you before hes releasing with one more deep thrust, triggering your own orgasm as your body shakes.

rafe pulls out, flipping your dress back down over your ass just in case someone sneaks upstairs as he discards of the condom and redresses before heading back to you, helping you turn over to sit on the edge of the bed.

“i love you.” rafe coos, pressing kisses to the top of your head as you lean against him.

“i love you too.” you take his hand in his. “and we should get back downstairs before they get suspicious.”

“absolutely.” rafe nods, following you out the bedroom and down the stairs, leaning in to whisper in your ear when he sees everyone is still occupied with frosting cookies, a smear of orange frosting across harpers nose. “and don’t think i forgot that you aren’t wearing panties anymore.”

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[hunnieknight]

"The Rooster's Little Chick" (+Art)

You are Pulcinella's precious grandchild. The Rooster brings you-the little chick- out of the coop to his field, and of course, he regrets it. A continue from this

GN! Reader, all Harbinger except Signora and Scaramouche, timeline after signora's funeral and before Sumeru event, mention of Signora's death and Scara's betrayal, reader is called using 'Master' by Pulcinella's underlings, age-gap , bit of comedic/crack, hints of yandere, borderline possessive, implied stalking and obsessive behaviour.

Note : Pulcinella able to control cryo in this hc. I DO NOT SPEAK RUSSIAN

Series II Series III

_________

Hatching

Pulcinella thought you both can bond together as grandpa-grandchild after this meeting. So he just asked you to pick him up while making sure you got his fatui emblem and his feather so you can get past the soldiers.

Pulcinella thought since you are so normal and regular, he can let the other Harbingers see you eye-to-eye.

Boy, for years working with them...he should've known.

You caught their eyes at first glance, but not because they are smitten, their dirty side of sick curiosity and pure dominance is what drove them to you.

What? you think because you are Pulcinella's precious grandchild they gonna treat you better? No no no, you are merely a blood child from their co-worker. They are going to treat you nicely only in front of your grandpa. Behind him? You are a little plaything, little baby chicken away from its protective rooster.

But Pulcinella knows. He knows his co-workers are psychos.

So as a good grandpa, he didn't hesitate to THREATEN the others if they hurt you in any way possible. Showed off his cryo power, he will make sure being frozen to death is the kindest mercy they will ever get if you got hurt.

First Chirp

It "tamed" the others, but not enough to make them back off. They are all curious and truth-seeker at heart.

Pulcinella never gave them your name, Keeping his mouth shut and only calling you "child" or "kid" whenever the others were with him. He makes sure the only information they know about you is you are his grandchild.

Once they eavesdrop and heard how you are "an adult and can take care of yourselves around his co-workers". You can bet those who eavesdrop just giggle and smirk hearing your statement.

But one day a mistake happened, after a meeting, when Childe is the first one to leave the room, his eyes widened in excitement to see you waiting outside the meeting room.

Gloved hands fidgeting with the bag with a Pyro Agent sharing his warmth with you using his pyro delusion. Your head is tucked under the cover of a fluffy hat with Pulcinella's feather, your mouth is hidden behind a scarf, and your red nose and cheek caused by the harsh cold of Snezhaya make you more eye-catching and interesting to him.

The Agent has spilt your name accidentally whilst Childe approaches you. "Master {Name}, would you like me to bring you a spare coat instead?". Both of you didn't realise Childe coming closer, Childe's heart jumped out of his chest after learning your name.

"So your name is {Name}!!!" Childe's loud voice booms around the hall into the meeting room where everyone's still packing their stuff. He smirked towards the meeting room door aaaanddd- "Childe..." there you go. He can't see it but he felt the disappointment in Pulcinella's eyes, hidden by his glasses.

Pulcinella who still standing by the door frame can feel the excitement from the meeting room. His sharp eyes stared at Childe who still smirking and slowly approaching you who froze at the loud call of your name. Now they know your name.

First Flap

Their behaviours are like a paradox. Whatever their doing is always the opposite of their reason. Are you... supposed to feel afraid because they are your grandpa's co-workers...or you supposed to feel frightened because they are THE HARBINGERS.

Huh? What do you mean they are invading your personal time? They just want to make sure there is no betrayal -like one from their own- from Pulcinella's side you know? Just to be safe.

They are not being pushy, they just want their co-worker's sweet grandchild to be safe. They just recently lost someone too not that they care ofc.

Hiding you away is unnecessary and telling you to not pick him up again has shown to be a futile attempt. When your grandpa told you to not go to the Palace, he found you being pampered in the palace hall by Childe who casually just said he invited you to the Palace. He didn't invite you, he stole you. Pulcinella tried to put one or three agents to cover you, but knowing his co-worker, they will not hesitate to deck Pulcinella's soldier just to get to you.

Sometimes you are just a toy. Finding where you are hiding is now a favourite game of theirs, where are you after meeting? Will you be outside the door waiting for your grandpa? Will you be in his office instead all tucked up warming yourself? Will you be in the garden hidden by the white bushes? Or you are in the library busy with books?.

A little chicken hid away in this harsh cold field. The Rooster? Of course, wouldn't hesitate to claw the "eagles" who trying to scoop you up.

Childe felt like he is the most worthy of you. You are not far off from his age and he feels like he has the responsibility of taking care of you as a payment to Pulcinella for taking care of his family. He is the only Harbingers who can interact with you outside the Palace but not for long. Considering he is a debt collector which forces him to travel, of course, he made sure to bring you a souvenir from any nation he visited.

Dottore is one of Harbingers who actively seeking you out. But not directly, he will order his underlings to check if you are in the Palace by yourself. If yes, he will tell them to whisk you away to his lab keeping you to himself. Often ended with Pulcinella having to directly pick you up from Dottore and checked your body for any injuries. Considering he is more hands-on in his experiment.

Pantalone and Sandrone have different approaches. You often found presents sent to your home. From a very fancy scarf and pieces of jewellery to some toys and plushies to really high-quality gadgets. Your grandpa often told you to just throw it away in fear they put some kind of tracking or camera to spy on you.

Columbina is also one of the hands-on when it comes to you. She often whisks you away after meeting, knowing you will be waiting for your grandpa. Of course, she has to race with Childe, seeing Childe just shot up from his seat whenever Pierro ended the meeting. Funny how instead of your own grandpa, it's his co-workers who are more excited to play with you.

Huh, Arlecchino just passed by you, completely ignoring you besides a simple glance. Is she not interested in you? Well, that is good, you heard from Childe she dislikes the businessmen Pulcinella and Pantalone. Either way, you can relax around- Huh...is it you or it seem like you see Fatuis agents a lot in your area now?

Speaking of Pierro and Capitano, they both are so conflicted with themselves. They know that compared to you, they are ANCIENT. The age gap and the generation gap are vast. They will have a crisis because it is their workmate's grandchild. Aren't they supposed to be your second grandpa instead? No no no, that won't do at all. They need to make sure they will be the second in command to take care of you if Pulcinella is away.

PULCINELLA DOES NOT TRUST ANYONE AT ALL.

#harbingers x reader #genshin x gender neutral reader #genshin x reader #imaginedraw #genshin art #genshin imagines #lol how do i tag these #omg this is taking a long time wtf #genshin x male reader #childe x reader #pantalone x reader #im tired to tag everyone #dottore x reader #columbina x reader

[crimsonbubble]

Nah, but imagine the reader being a Colonel all serious and shii-

And Ghost is just like:

"Just one chance bro pleassseee😩"

"Let me be a barracks bunny only for this mfker😩😩😩"

cw. suggestive/crack fic, gn!reader, colonel!reader, very slight abuse of power, simon has a praise kink *not proofread, just pure horny

[I love reading cod men using their rank against reader,, BUT READER USING TJEIR RANK AGAISNT COD MEN???? SIGN ME THE FUCK UP 💳💥💳💥💳💥]

unhinged ghost would absolutely love to be your personal barracks bunny

ghost literally doing the absolute most when he knows that you're gonna be stopping by the base

ofc you catch onto him

he's being so oblivious to his own secrecy

calling him into your office just to see him again

doesn't even matter what you say to him, he'll hang off of every word like a moth to a flame

praising him with stuff like;

"ya did well today, simon."

"atta boy, there we go."

giving him a firm pat on the back as you pass him in the hallway

only you are allowed to call him simon, he nearly ripped a recruits arm off after they teased him about it

making him run little errands for you, just so you can praise him and see his eyes go wide and sparkly

being paired up with him for a mission and ghost is losing himself

he's all but two seconds away from just ripping his mask off and kissing you

does all the heavy lifting, meaning he's killing everyone for you

imagine a mission going slightly awry and having to hide away for a quick second til things calmed down

just grabbing his hand and tugging him into a random dark room

being forced to stand so close together, your scent is making him dizzy

patting his cheek to bring him back down to earth and saying "can't have you leavin' me just yet, still got a mission on hand."

ghost merely nodding and going along with you

but on the inside, he's screaming and tearing his pants off

would be on his knees for you in a fraction of a second

literally loves being a recipient of your praises yet he denies having a praise kink

#bubbly speaks <3 #ash answers #bubbly writes <3 #cod x reader #cod mw22 #cod mwii #cod smut #cod x reader smut #simon ghost riley #cod modern warfare #cod mw2 #cod x you #cod x y/n #cod x gn!reader #simon riley #simon riley smut #simon riley x reader #simon ghost x reader #ghost smut #ghost x reader #ghost x you #ghost x y/n