#they could have even tested the waters by slow rolling their own website for a year with $1 a month for exclusives

[apocalypticgargoyle]

𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙀𝙉𝘿. ҂ 𝙙𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙢

request:

Hi!! Idk if you’re taking requests rn lol but I was wondering if you can write a clay imagine? It can be smut or anything lol

pairing: dream x fm!reader

warnings: nsfw (18+ minors dni), smut, calling dream clay, cliche apocalypse au, blood, kinda sad ngl

word count: ~3000

links: ao3

a/n: Hi everyone. I have no idea what this is, but if you like it let me know! I was struggling with coming up with something for dream but here we are on a crackpot tangent. N E WAY, thank you for all your support and requests! Have a great week and happy reading ♡ ᵍᵉⁿᵉ

Soapy bubbles clung to your arms as you pressed your hands into the hot water, sighing as you reached the bottom of the sink. You didn’t care about the murky discoloration of the water from the stack of dishes you had just polished off. You attempted to let the stress of your day roll off your shoulders to mix into that same water. Call it a baptism, but the solace you got standing before the sink, pouring your emotions into the dark, louring water was comparable to nothing. The radio buzzed with slight static as the station attempted to break through the heavy interference.

That was until three long pulses echoed over the station, making your skin crawl as if an unseen force were intruding on your alone time. You stood up straighter, water dripping down your arms and splashing on the linoleum floor beneath you as you listened to the grizzled news broadcaster read from an obviously unedited announcement. The world outside of your apartment seemed to still, silence echoing through the streets where shrilling sirens lived only moments before.

“Breaking news… NASA has just verified that the mystery asteroid is, in fact, in danger of crashing into the Earth… As of this moment-” His voice cut out, your radio buzzing into static. In a panicked effort, you vaulted across your kitchen, slipping on the dishwater in the process as you tumbled to the ground. Before the pain could set in, you climbed to your feet, smacking your hand atop of the radio. It finally crackled back to life as you twisted at the dials feverishly. “... three days. To repeat, there is a countdown on the NASA website… take shelter when the time nears.”

Your ears rang alongside the three pulses to indicate the message was over. You were in denial, figuring there was no way this asteroid was actually going to obliterate the Earth. Surely, it was a joke. Everyone had been making memes of the space rock since it was picked up on NASA’s radar a month prior. Surely, this was just a test.

You waited for the city to come back to life, but everything remained still. After everything you’d all been through in the last year, an asteroid was going to be the end.

A sharp and urgent knock hammered against your door, making you jump a few feet in the air. Before you could move to see who it was, the person was already through the threshold. You peered around the corner of the kitchen and down the hall, your gaze meeting a pair of dark green irises. Clay’s towering figure stalked toward you, his eyes brimming with tears and panic. He pulled you into his embrace rather hurriedly, as if he’d been itching to wrap around you before he broke down.

The hint of cologne clouding the air around the two of you suggested that he was on his way out. As your hands followed their muscle memory to grip onto his clothes, he dug his face into the crook of your neck. It was becoming clear that even if you weren’t responding to your best friend’s need, he was going to take it from you.

He pulled away from you slightly. Your mind had gone completely silent as he looked at you, his attention struggling to focus on one part of your face. Your body felt numb and your tongue had gone dry. His gaze traveled towards the ground and he stepped back slightly, worry spreading across his features as he clamped his hand around your forearm.

“Why are you bleeding? What happened?” His voice cracked slightly as he dug into the drawer beside you to find a towel. You furrowed your brows before finally catching sight of the blood seeping from your arm and between his fingers. His hand was large enough that it nearly served as its own bandage.

He tugged you behind him towards your bathroom. “I fell…” You mumbled, your mind now racing with questions. Why couldn’t you feel the cut? Or his hands? He pushed you upwards to sit on the bathroom counter, his crimson hands shaking slightly as he rinsed them off. Your fingers tightened around the towel holding your wound together. As he focused on the task before him, he seemed to calm down ever so slightly. He rolled his head on his shoulders and took a deep breath to steady himself as fished through your First Aid kit.

“I was on my way to Nick’s and I heard the news. I’m…” He brought his arm up slightly to brush away a few tears against his shoulder. He pulled open a package with his teeth. You watched him carefully as he worked to clean you up. His blond locks hung over his eyes, curling around his ears and twisting about as he focused and you could almost hear his mother’s voice telling him he needed a haircut.

Your chest ached. “Clay, I think I’m having some kind of a breakdown,” you mumbled, your own eyes prickling with tears as he looked up at you quickly. Usually, you were the one that kept it together. It had been like that since the two of you were teenagers. Despite the fact that Clay’s tall, muscular stature gave off the appearance of an intimidating being. In actuality he always let his emotions get the best of him, leaving you in charge of being the rational one.

But as he patched up your arm and struggled not to fall apart, the reality was settling in to weigh heavily on your shoulders.

He began to talk softly to you---much like you usually did for him---making sure his touches were delicate and slow. While his hands were coarse from years of football and building decks with his dad in the summers when the two of you were younger, they were so tender when dealing with you. He cradled you as if you would break at the slightest flex of his finger.

“Why didn’t you just go to Nick’s?” You asked him once he’d finished bandaging your arm and had begun rewashing his hands. The scarlet water in the sink looked almost surreal after you’d been staring so long at the caliginous dishwater. He rested his hands on the edge of the sink, his eyes flashing up to look at himself in the mirror before chewing on the inside of his cheek.

Your hand traveled up his arm, his skin warm beneath your touch as you tugged on his bicep to bring him closer to you. He moved to wrap you in his embrace once again, his breath melding into your hair as his fingers closed around the fabric of your shirt. “I’d rather spend the end of the world with you,” he barely whispered, pressing a kiss to your shoulder softly.

You pulled away from him gently, his forehead moving to rest against your own. One of his hands moved to brush into your hair, his fingers finding purchase against your neck. The familiar smell of smoky vanilla and sage seeped into your mind at his closeness. You thought about your first kiss shared in “the name of science,” after you turned fourteen. Clay had been so awkward in his body at that time; his hair shaggy, stretch marks along his knees from his growth spurt, and a growing realization that you were in fact, a member of the opposite sex.

The Clay before you, even in his state of anguish and anxiety, stood with a cockiness that that Clay couldn’t have even dreamt of. His thumb glossed over your jaw, his eyes cast down as if his mind was wreaking havoc on his movements. Cautiously, you leaned towards him, sealing the space between the two of you as your lips pressed against his. The air of catastrophe seemed to dissipate around you as he pulled you tighter against him. The taste of mint and a faint whisper of fruit from the gum he always chewed blended against your tongue. Your arms moved to wrap around his waist, wanting him pressed to you as close as he could be.

He wrapped his hands around your thighs, pulling you up and into his arms as he made his way to your bedroom. As your back hit the mattress, Clay’s lips were back on yours, your fingers slipping beneath the hem of his shirt to tug the fabric over his head. You sighed as he hesitated before nipping at the skin of your collarbones, his tongue ghosting against any mark that formed on your skin from his teeth. You drove your hands into his hair, your fingers locking around the slight curls forming. He pushed your shirt off and you wiggled out of your sweatpants.

His hips dug into yours, the friction bringing a lazy smile to your face as you bit your lip. You tugged on his hair, making him moan into your ear to mix with his motions. “I want you, Clay,” you stated, your voice falling from your lips in a slightly deeper tone, your breathing uneven with passion. He moved to look into your eyes, pausing for a moment before his hand slid between your waistband and your hip to remove your underpants. It was clear that even as the timer clicked away the minutes the two of you had together, you wanted to savor him. If the world ended now as the two of you were in each other’s embrace, you would be fulfilled.

He smirked slightly at your words, his lips finding your neck once again. “You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to hear that,” he moaned, pressing a kiss behind your ear. He slunk down to press his lips against your stomach, moving slowly up your body to bury his face in your hair, grinding his hips against yours. You fought not to roll your eyes as you hooked your fingers through his belt loops, pulling his pants off. He pressed his lips against yours, humming into the kiss as you wrapped your leg around one of his. You slipped your tongue into his mouth, grinding against him.

As Clay pushed himself into you, your whole body relaxed as if he were made for you. He dug his face into the crook of your neck, letting you adjust to him. You hummed slightly, taking your bottom lip between your teeth as he began to move. He gripped the edge of the mattress beside your head as he leaned his weight on his forearm, the angle bringing your thigh to rest against his side. You wrapped your arm around his shoulder, bringing your hips up to move with his. “You’re so beautiful…” he mumbled, his lips brushing against your collarbones again as his thrusts into you became deeper.

You began to feel every inch of him in you as his hips ground against yours. Clay’s lips left yours to press against your jaw and your ear, one of his hands interlocking with yours, binding the two of you further together in the act. It was his carefulness of your forearm that sent a shock wave through your body as you were bitterly reminded that instead of a lifetime of cherishing moments like this, the two of you were cursed into his disaster arc.

His hand pressed into the mattress, fingers curling around the sheets as you pulled him down to you again, his lips melding to yours. You groaned, finding your sweet spot as he did so, making him pick up his pace. His other hand pressed against the side of your neck, bringing your skin closer to his lips as he pressed open mouth kisses to the landscape of your neck, thrusting into you and making the tension in your body tighten with pleasure. Your arms moved to wrap around Clay’s torso, pressing your lips against his shoulder as he moved. Your toes curled as you finally reached your orgasm, calling out his name and feeling him release as well, riding out your pleasure.

As you laid beside him, he played with your fingers, the quietness between the two of you nearly comforting. There was almost the question of “what now” hanging in the air.

A knock came at your door once again, your heart dropping slightly at who the person could be. You shot a look to Clay before pulling on one of the discarded shirts and your shorts from earlier. Your apartment was cold after being in bed with Clay, the air nipping at your skin and sending a shiver down your skin. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed the billboard beside your window had the countdown displayed in heavy red numbers. You swallowed your uneasiness and opened your door.

Nick stood before you, his eyebrows slightly perked at---what you could only assume---your unkempt appearance. He wet his lips briefly. “Dream’s here right?” He asked, peering over your head a bit. You silently opened your door completely, letting him inside. Clay came out of your bedroom, tugging a hoodie over his head that he had previously shoved in one of your drawers. As Nick eyed him, it seemed like he’d forgotten whatever serious matter he needed Clay for. Instead of the skittish expression, Nick’s face twisted into a knowingly smug quip.

Clay ran his fingers through his hair, moving down the hallway and into your kitchen. “What’s up?” He queried Nick. You followed the two of them as Nick began to ramble about the end of the world.

Your chest tightened at his words as you took a seat at your kitchen counter. Clay uncapped a beer, leaning on the marble across from you. “There’s a bunker nearby. It belongs to some random old guy but I know some people who can get us a spot,” Nick muttered almost as if he were worried your neighbors would hear and sabotage his plans. He looked between the two of you quickly. “I think it’s worth a shot.”

You watched Clay closely as he thought, his expression nearly blank due to his somberness. You could practically hear the clock ticking away outside as the red light began to seep into your apartment. Clay chewed the inside of his cheek. “What do you think?” He asked, suddenly breaking the deafening silence and turning to you. “I wanna go where you go.” He looked almost like a child as he said this, but you were grateful he wanted to be with you in the end.

You tore your eyes from him, focusing on the ring forming in your sink from the dishwater that you hadn’t had the opportunity to drain. Your mind raced with the possibility that Nick was offering. “What’s the worst that can happen? We’re dying anyway, right?” You responded wearily.

And that’s how you found yourself packed into an underground shelter, Clay’s body pressed against yours as nameless people crowded the dense area. Nick huddled against the two of you, the asteroid’s timer serving as a foreboding heartbeat as it reminded you all that these were the last moments of your life. Clay’s arm tightened around your shoulders as you buried your face in the softness of his sweatshirt. Your legs were going numb from sitting on the ground with your knees folded to your chest, but you didn’t dare move from his grasp. Nick’s side dug into your own as he attempted to shrug away from the hysterical woman beside him whispering to herself.

Only the mumbling of prayers and lamenting sobs broke up the lulling music playing over a small Ham radio resting on a bookshelf in the corner. The tune reminded you of an eerie scene in a movie from the ‘60s. As the song faded, a newscaster began to discuss the timer, wishing that everyone was with loved ones and had spent the last of their money.

And then the final ten seconds came. Your fingers threaded with Clay’s as he pressed a lasting kiss to your forehead.

“... Nine. Eight…”

Nick leaned into you. The two of you had never really been close, but on your journey to the bunker, he'd become a companion to you just as much as he was Clay's.

“... Seven. Six…”

You let your mind travel to your past, prom in particular. When Clay shut the skirt of your dress in his passenger door by accident. You were so mad at him for finding humor in the situation.

“... Five. Four…”

You thought about the week prior when you were considering skipping a lecture because you were tired. What you wouldn’t give to go back to the simplicity of problems like that.

“... Three. Two…”

You hugged Clay tighter to you, hoping that if you both got blasted into whatever kind of eternity was waiting, you’d land at the same time.

“... One.”

Everyone seemed to hold their breath, even the newscaster. The silence was painful as you all waited.

Clay and Nick moved quickly, looking around the room. You furrowed your brows at them, your grip tightening around the front of Clay’s sweater. “Do you hear that?” Clay stated, his voice coming out rushed. Nick nodded, watching as the rest of the men in the bunker began to talk amongst themselves. You couldn’t hear anything, worry settling.

“What?” You asked, barely above a whisper.

Clay pushed himself to sit up away from the wall, dragging you up with him. “How can you not hear that?” He urged mildly. Fear began to pick at your nerves as you noticed the same reactions filling the shelter. Nick stood up, following some of the other guys who heard whatever they were talking about. Clay slipped from your grasp. “I’ll be right back,” he muttered and you grabbed his hand. His eyes flashed a different color as he looked at you.

A few of the women followed the group, attempting to get their companion’s attention before one of them opened the shelter door.

#dream x fem!reader #dream x reader #dream x you #dream smut #apocalypse #college au #dream fluff #dreamwastaken x reader #dreamwastaken scenario #dreamwastaken fluff #dreamwastaken au #tw angst

[jewish-space-laser]

ok i have an idea for a cbl blurb? could u do a blurb from harry’s pov from the night where he got drunk and how he felt when he saw yn and stuff? ik it already happened but i think seeing it from his viewpoint would be interesting!

Could be Lethal - Part Three (Harry’s POV)

“And every time I’ve held a rose, It seems I only felt the thorns, And so it goes, and so it goes, And so will you soon I suppose...”

– And So It Goes, Billie Joel

HELLO EVERYONE! It’s been months since I’ve posted anything on here, but I randomly got the motivation to pick this up last week. I apologize in advance for my rusty writing skills! This ask has literally been sitting in my inbox for 10 months, so posting it actually feels quite cleansing. Anyway, here is a (long) blurb full of angst, angst, and you guessed it, angst! I hope you love Harry’s take of that night as much as I do. I love you all muchly, thank you for your ongoing love and support <3 xoxoxoxoxoxoxooox Tile

(3.8k word)

You and Harry were friends, with a capital ‘F’. Yeah, you’ve been sleeping in his bed for the past two months, and maybe your entire nervous system goes into hyperdrive when you’re in the same room, but that’s normal, right?

or

The one where you and Harry have an arrangement… of the cuddling sort.

 See the CBL masterlist here!

WARNING: Detailed descriptions of heavy drinking

~~~

It was bullshit. It was all bullshit. 

Harry was miserable. He knew it, his friends knew it, his family knew it… it seemed the only person who wasn’t picking up on his desperation was you. 

You were a complete enigma to him. Sometimes, you were the warmest, most open person he’d ever met, indulging him with interesting conversations, stupid jokes, and even the occassional existential discussion. It was always difficult for Harry to truly open up to a person, having been jaded time and time again by people who weren’t able to look past his famous exterior. 

That’s what makes it so much harder, he thinks. Knowing you properly, you knowing him properly. It made the moments where you were closed off harsher, colder, more difficult to read. 

Since you left his house two days prior, he had done just about anything he could to take his mind off of you. He loved thinking about you, but he also hated thinking about you. It was tortuous and circular and he just wanted a brief moment of emotional respite. 

No, he didn’t want respite, he needed it. 

So he watched all three Lord of the Rings movies in a row, tested out a new stir fry recipe, spent way too much money online shopping, and even scrolled through the Humane Society website in a moment of weakness. But none of it mattered, because even if he could distract himself for a moment, you were still there, lingering in the peripherals of his mind like a song stuck in his head. 

It was dizzying and mind-boggling, and Harry was at a loss for what to do. So when Sunday morning rolled around and it still felt like his lungs were being crushed into a ball, he started drinking. 

It was only 8:00AM, but he bypassed the coffee cabinet and went straight to the fridge, pulling out a chilled bottle of champagne. The pop of the cork was as loud as a gunshot, but Harry didn’t even flinch, hardly registering the sound of it hitting the floor across the room as he rushed the bottle to his lips. 

Bubbles fizzed past his tongue and dripped down his chin, sliding down his bare chest before puddling on the floor. He had to squeeze his eyes shut tightly at the burn of the carbonation, but each gulp sent pleasant tingles over his skin. 

For the first time in ages, his mind felt numb. He didn’t necessarily feel good, but he didn’t feel miserable anymore, and that’s what mattered. He could close his eyes without seeing your smile flash in his head, he could listen to music without immediately relating the lyrics to you, and after his second bottle of wine, he was even able to brew a cup of coffee without thinking of you. 

Okay, maybe he thought of you a little. 

At some point, he passed out on the couch, cartons of Vietnamese takeout sitting cold on his coffee table. When his eyes finally blinked open, the sun had already started to set.

“Fuck,” he muttered to himself. There was a familiar ache pulsing behind his eyes, and he groaned loudly into his empty house. It never used to feel empty, but now you’d come and gone, and it was too late. You’d left your mark on his house and his coffee and his heart… so he drank more. 

There was no more wine, so he started in on his collection of hard liquor, expensive bottles lined on top of his cupboards. Normally they were reserved for when he had guests over, but this fell into the realm of desperation. His sunken eyes scanned the glass bottles before settling on the cheapest of them, an unopened Maker’s Mark. It would do. 

He was pouring a healthy sized glass of the whisky, and then suddenly he wasn’t. His heavy eyes blinked in confusion as he stared across the bar at the bartender, who was raising his eyebrows expectantly. 

“That’ll be thirty-five pounds, mate,” the bartender said, “got roped into buying the first round, eh?”

“Yeah,” Harry grunted, glancing over his shoulder to see Thomas and Jessie watching him from a booth. 

He doesn’t remember leaving his house, let alone coming to the pub with his friends. In fact, if he tried to think about it, his memory of the entire day felt fragmented, like pieces of a puzzle that didn’t quite fit together. 

In his mind, this was a success. A full day gone without thinking about you or talking to you or seeing you. The clock behind the bar read 00:43 in red neon numbers. He took one of the shots quickly, signing the bill and taking the remaining five back to his friends. 

“Harry mate, we told you we’re not getting pissed tonight,” Thomas groaned, “what’d you get six shots for?”

“What kind are they?” Jessie asked, wrinkling their nose. 

“I dunno,” Harry shrugged, setting the tray down directly in front of himself. His vision swayed to and fro, but he still managed to down another shot, disregarding the concerned look his friends shared. “It’s rum. If you don’t want any, that’s fine.”

“It’s a Sunday, mate,” Thomas reminded him gently.

“We’re at a pub, aren’t we?” Harry slurred. “Supposed to get drunk here.”

“You asked us to come here,” Jessie said slowly, “said you needed to talk to us about something.”

Harry blinked at them slowly, swaying slightly in his seat. He didn’t remember any of this. 

“Actually, he said he needed a drink,” Thomas corrected, “I didn’t realize he meant twenty drinks.”

Another shot burned down his throat, and then everything was cold. 

“Harry.”

His head was pounding. Every limb felt heavy. He couldn’t bear to open his eyes, already overwhelmed by the echo of Thomas’s voice reverberating off of the tile floors. 

“Harry.”

He knew that somebody was trying to get his attention, but he just couldn’t. The alcohol had done its job for most of the day, keeping his brain muddled down and diluted just to spare him the pain of remembering. But now, it backfired, trapping him inside his own head with no way out, with nothing to do but remember. He could hear people talking in the background, but couldn’t make out what they were saying. It was as if he was underwater, slipping further and further down with each painful clench of his heart.

He felt a hand press against his arm, and jerked away, causing his stomach to twist. He didn’t want to be here anymore, and he certainly didn’t want to be bothered. 

“G’way, Thomas,” he managed to grunt. 

“It’s me.”

Your voice was clear as crystal to him, but he knew it couldn’t be real. You had left him, after all.

The image of you driving away from his house was burned into his memory, playing over and over again in slow motion. If he thought hard enough, he could even remember the way your body had felt beneath his, whining and squirming and gasping, just like he’d always dreamed about. He could remember the sunken expression on your face the next morning, the heavy silence of the car ride to the coffee shop. He could remember how he’d hoped, so badly, that you’d finally talk about it, this unspoken connection that could no longer be denied. Most of all, he remembers the way his heart dropped when you told him that you didn’t remember any of it.

Another gentle brush, this time along his hairline, and he managed to open his eyes just a sliver. 

You looked amazing. Well, there were circles under your eyes, you were wearing your pajamas and slippers, and you were frowning in concern, but to Harry, you were the most beautiful thing. 

 “You’re here… y’really here….” he sighed. 

You were crouched in front of him, holding a plastic cup of water, and all he wanted to do was pull you into his chest. You looked sleepy and cosy, just like you always did when you stayed over. Before he could reach out to pull you close, you were putting the rim of the cup against his bottom lip.

He took it, grateful for the relief it provided his dry mouth. For the first time since he came to, he took in his surroundings. He was in a single stall bathroom, curled on the floor next to the toilet. The walls were an ugly pale yellow, while the floors were white, making the streaks of dirt and grime more noticeable than ever. Thomas was leaning against the sink across the room, watching you as you tried to get him to finish the cup. 

“Y’look so pretty, always look so good,” Harry slurred, “just wanna snuggle, like we always do.”

He loved the way your mouth dropped open. Everything about you was endearing, really. He watched as you twisted your head to say something to Thomas, water sloshing around in the cup when you nodded your head quickly. Thomas left immediately after, but Harry hardly even noticed. 

When you turned back around to face him, he felt blinded. Despite the dark circles under your eyes, they’re bright and they pierce through him just like always. He loves the color of your skin and the shape of your nose and the little crease that forms between your eyebrows when you’re anxious. He thinks he could probably paint you with his eyes closed. 

Warmth licked across his skin when you brushed your fingertips against his forehead, tucking a stray lock of hair back into place. Harry leaned into your touch, unwilling to let the moment pass too quickly. 

“Can you try taking a sip of water, H?” You tilted your head. “For me?”

He could have laughed, had he not been so nauseated. He would do anything for you normally, but he really did feel awful. “G’na make me sick,” he insisted, wrinkling his nose at the cup in your hand. Even though he could hardly focus, his eyes zeroed in on the faded X scrawled in sharpie on the back of your hand, a souvenir from your night out at TAVERN. He had a matching mark on his hand, and he dreaded the moment the ink would wash off fully. Just another thing forgotten.

He just wanted you.  

He hadn’t meant to say it out loud, but the look on your face told him that it had slipped out. There was no way he regretted it though, not with you right in front of him. Not in this state of mind. 

“It’s gonna make you feel better, and then we can go home,” you urged softly, scooting a tiny bit closer to him.

Home. When he thought of home, he thought about mornings in his house, sunlight filtering in through the blinds and leaving shadowed stripes across your skin. Home was the way you squinted your eyes tighter together right before waking up. Home was you at his kitchen table, going off at him about not doing his dishes. 

“Y’coming home w’me?” He managed to say. Your eyes softened.

“Only if you drink this whole cup,” you lifted it up to him once again, gingerly tilting his head up with a finger on his chin. Even though he felt like his stomach would combust if tried to swallow anything, he allowed you to help him drink some water. Some sloshed messily onto his shirt, but it felt sobering. You met his eyes for a moment, “is that good?”

“I’d do anything for you.”

If you asked him to drink water, he would drink water. He would drink an entire ocean of water. It was achingly clear to literally everybody but you. He could tattoo your name over his heart and you still wouldn’t see.

You gulped loudly, but didn’t say a word, simply prompting him to take another sip of water. He wished more than anything that you’d say something. Make some kind of facial expression. He just wanted a signal, a sign, that you felt anything towards him; disgust, affection, pity. 

He was sure you must pity him. 

Harry drank the rest of the water, cheeks burning as he asked you for a refill. He was still drunk, but the fog had cleared enough for him to sit up straight without feeling like he was going to hurl. He watched you refill the cup in the sink that looked like it hadn’t been cleaned in decades, but that was honestly the least of his concerns. 

“Y’must think I’m pathetic,” he grumbled, squeezing his eyes shut and tilting his head back against the wall. “Can’t lose you.”

“You haven’t lost me,” he heard you say quietly.

But it felt like he had. Because even though you were friends, it wouldn’t be the same if he couldn’t fall asleep to the sound of your soft exhales. It wouldn’t be the same if he couldn’t feel that rush of excitement when you sneakily texted him under the table on nights out. Having you at a distance could never be enough. 

“Harry…” you sighed, rubbing your eyes, “why did you drink so much tonight?”

If your obliviousness hadn’t been so devastating, he would have laughed. How could you sit here with him, look into his eyes, and not see that his heart was entirely in your hands? How could he explain anything to you if you hadn’t already seen it?

So he wouldn’t try. Not right now. 

He mustered up the strength to push up onto his knees, managing to stand up fully with your steady grip on his arms. He took one shaky step as his head spun, and felt your arms snake around his waist to keep him balanced. Without even thinking about it, he wrapped his arm over your shoulder, reveling in the feeling of having you so close as you helped him out of the toilet. 

You brought him to a stop in the main room by the bar, and he couldn’t help but bury his nose into the top of your head. You smelled just like you always did. It had only been a few nights, but your scent was already fading on his bedsheets. 

“Y’smell like lavender,” he hummed, squeezing your arm lightly, “s’like you’re tryin; t’torture me…. So pretty.”

It really was torture, having you hold onto him as you both walked out of the pub. You were distracting, with your warm skin and soft hands. Each step was difficult; his feet were heavy as anvils and he just wanted to curl up right here on the sidewalk. 

Just as he was considering plopping down on the pavement, he heard the familiar beep of your car opening. He closed his eyes once he was sat in the passenger seat, feeling you fuss over his seatbelt. He flinched slightly when you slid a cold water bottle between his knees.

Harry blinked, and then suddenly you were buckled in behind the steering wheel, poking his arm and peering at him with tired eyes. “Can you stay awake for me, H? Just till we get to your house, okay?”

“Y’coming to my house?”

You were so good to him, all the time. By the looks of your attire, you were ready to be in bed hours ago, yet here you were, patient as ever.

“Yes, I’m taking you home,” you said through a yawn. 

“Miss having you at my house,” Harry exhaled. He didn’t even know what he was saying really, just the same thoughts and memories circling through his mind like planets around the sun, all them centered on you. “My sheets don’t smell like you anymore.”

Suddenly, he felt hot all over. His trousers were too scratchy against his skin, his palms felt clammy, and the longer you stayed silent on the other side of the car, his stomach started turning. In an effort to cool off and calm down, he let his head fall against the window, the cool glass soothing his skin. 

Drunk or not, he was trying to tell you how he feels, he was constantly trying to tell you how he feels… and you didn’t say a word. You never did. It was so frustrating that he found himself biting back tears. 

Finally, after what felt like hours, you cleared your throat. “You can’t…” your voice cracked, “you can’t say things like that, Harry. It hurts me when you say things like that.”

“I don’t wanna hurt you,” Harry managed to say. “But it’s the truth.”

He was so confused. How on earth could you be hurting when he was sitting here with his arms wide open? Was he so repulsive that the mere thought of being with him caused you pain, somehow?

He was too drunk for this. 

Luckily, you seemed to be on the wavelength. “Let’s just… not talk,” you said, shoulders slumped. 

Harry was feeling awfully dejected himself. He’d spent the last few days trying to cope with his complicated feelings, and now he was back at square one. Every time he thought he knew where the two of you stood, you would say something vague and he would start all over. Your relationship was like a house of cards; delicate, fragile, and knocked to the ground with the slightest shift, the tiniest gust of wind. 

The headache started out small, but by the time you pulled your car into Harry’s driveway, he was feeling like he might keel over. Somehow, he was simultaneously drunk and hungover. If he was going to make it up the stairs to his room, he was going to need something in his stomach, and water that wasn’t from a pub bathroom.

It was humiliating enough that he’d needed you to help him from the car, but upon entering his house, he nearly kicked his shoe through the living room window, grumbling about toast. He knew he’d been less than impressive tonight, but perhaps this was what you needed -- seeing him at rock bottom -- to finally open up and have a real conversation about what you could be. 

When he woke up in the morning, he would be sober, and he would be ready. He would make you coffee like he always does, and maybe he’d even run out and pick up fresh pastries.

“Want some toast,” he said, though he was fairly certain he’d said it once already. 

You were standing in front of him, toes just inches apart, and it felt instinctive to place his hands on your waist and pull you in. The silk pajama top you were wearing was cool against his hands, but he could feel the heat of your skin underneath, the frantic thumping of your heart against your ribcage tickling his fingertips.

Your hands were on his shoulders to keep him steady, but he was suddenly feeling more sober than he had all night. All day, really. 

Harry slid his hands further behind you, locking together behind your back. Having you close felt incredible. It hadn’t even been three days since he last saw you, yet every atom in his body was craving your touch.

“You, um,” he felt your shaky whale against his collar bone, “you have to let go of me if you want me to make you toast.”

Letting go of you felt physically impossible, so instead, Harry dipped his head down and rested his forehead against yours. The anticipation was excruciating as he waited for you to do what you always did: sink into his arms, wrap yourself around him, soothe him to sleep with the weight of your head on his chest.

Fissures cracked through his heart when you pushed him back, taking a single step back that may as well have been a mile. Suddenly, the air all around him felt cold, the room felt darker, the silence felt louder. He took a deep breath in, but still felt like he was suffocating.

“Do you really not remember?”

He needed to know. He had done everything in his power to think about anything else, but had somehow ended up here, standing face to face with you. He wonders if this is how it was supposed to be, if throwing you together over and over again was the universe’s ultimate plan, if all of this misery would be worth it in the end. 

He’d experienced heartbreak before, but this was something else. And when you choked out, “Harry, please don’t make me say it,” in the smallest voice he’d ever heard you use, he knew that he could write millions of records about the pain of this moment, and still never do it justice.

“You remember, don’t you?”

All you did was nod your head once, but he suddenly felt drained. Maybe it was the full day of heavy, reckless drinking… or maybe it was the realization that things really might not work out. He still wanted to try, though. Even though you’d left the other day, there were countless other times you had stayed. For months you’d been coming over in secret, coming out of your shell and showing him how amazing you really were. That had to count for something; there had to be a reason. 

Coffee. He would make coffee in the morning and the two of you would fix everything. 

“Should we head to bed? ‘S getting kind of late, y’must be exhausted.”

You really did look tired, your eyes rimmed with red from yawning over and over, back hunched and shoulders slumped. He was feeling knackered himself, and was more than ready for this night to be over.

“Actually… I think I’m gonna head back home,” you gulped. Harry felt like he’d been slapped, but he couldn’t move. He couldn’t speak. It’s as if you’d turned to sand; there one moment and slipping through his fingers the next.

“You don’t want to stay?” Harry tried to keep his voice even, but even he could hear how it wavered. He clenched his jaw to keep from crying.

“I just… have to go home,” you said, looking everywhere but at him. 

He waited for you to say something else, but instead watched as you hoisted your purse further up onto your shoulder and walked out the door. Shell shocked, he stood there frozen, even as your headlights disappeared down the street. 

A long breath blew past his lips as he finally moved to lock his front door, any hope of you walking back through it dashed by the way you’d walked out for a second time. 

Harry likely would have benefited from a glass of water and pain medication, but with a buzzing brain and a shattered heart, all he could manage was to pass out on the couch fully clothed, dreaming about what might have been if you had just stayed.  

~~~

As always, let me know what you think! I love talking to you <3 xoxoxoxox Tile

[joheun-saram]

To Make a Power Couple (knj) | 02

Chapter 2 - Pizza and Life Chats

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Summary- Namjoon and Y/N go on their first date, and Namjoon is whipped.

word count- 5k

pairing- idol!namjoon x ceo!reader

rating- pg13 for now

genre- series, slow burn, fluff eventual smut, strangers2lovers

warnings- mentions of hangovers and panic attacks, tooth-rottingly fluffy

a.n- okay here’s the second part! I wrote this up fairly quickly (don’t expect this to be the norm!). This part I wanted to kind of address the stress of overworking as a young adult (GUILTY 🙋🏻‍♀️) so sorry if it gets a little serious at parts. I also wanted to switch it up so it’s from Namjoon’s perspective. I hope you enjoy it. SOFT JOON BEING A BIG OLD SOFTY.

Feedback much appreciated! 💕

taglist - @beach-bitch-bitch-beach​, @sassyuniversitytacopeanut 

-

Namjoon woke up startled as his phone alarm rang. He was groggy and his splitting headache made him nauseous. “I’m never going to drink again”, he mumbled. He groaned as he got off the couch he had crashed on the night before, trying not to trip over Taehyung who seemed to be dozing happily on the floor as he made his way to his room. He hadn’t stayed at the dorms in a while, preferring the quiet solitary of his own apartment nowadays, and with his hangover in full swing he felt like he was walking through a stranger's house. 

Last month was hell. He had procrastinated on his songs and none of the vocal guides were even halfway done before the due date. Everytime he tried to finish a song a new one would pop up in his head and he would start on that, leading to a hard drive full of files labelled “finish soon” and “draft”, and a notebook full of scratched out scribbles. It was like his brain had decided to abandon him, deciding it had had enough of his perpetual melancholy. He had felt drained and burnt out, a husk with no creative juices left. Luckily, Yoongi and a few of the producers had taken pity on his stressed out state and lent a hand so he had been able to finish the bare minimum three days ago - before the label pressured him further. He was never more grateful for a small break.

In all honesty, he needed a way to jumpstart his brain, and get out of the routine of home, practice, meetings, studio, home. Sometimes, he almost wished he didn’t have the success he had so he could go out and let loose a little - a club, a party, anything. But the last time he went somewhere like that he got swarmed and the police had to be involved. He couldn’t risk that, not after the trouble Big Hit went to threaten media outlets a year and a half ago, when he was caught with what they called a hickey, but was actually a stress rash. 

As he brushed his teeth today, he smiled at the mirror. Last month may have been terrible, but last night was one of the best he’d had in the past year. 

When he had heard Bang PD’s team talk about how they were attending the charity gala as he met them for notes on his songs, he was intrigued. He had read about this non-profit in the paper before. They seemed to be helping bridge the gap between people through communication and that spoke to him. So much so that he had scrolled through their website multiple times, reading testimonials and almost memorizing the mission statement. They wanted to help kids learn English for free so they could communicate globally. He really liked the idea. It was hard for him to learn the language as a kid and he knew that the only reason he became as fluent as he is from the tutors his parents paid for and his obsession with American television and music. Although he doesn’t need the tutoring anymore, he does enjoy talking to the in-house tutor at the company, John, from time to time and improving his skills. The fact that this company wanted to add a John to every school in Korea starting from the rural areas, made Namjoon want to meet the man behind the movement. Little did he know, he’d be meeting the girl who’d shift his idea of the ideal.

He had never been more glad to have convinced his company to let him and the boys attend an event. He had initially suggested it as a way to break the mundane before their comeback practices started and network while supporting a cause he liked. Two days ago, he wouldn’t have guessed it would be an actual fun night leading to him nursing a headache.

He spent the next hour reliving last night as he showered and caught up on the news. He also read the messages he sent last night over a hundred times and had butterflies each time. Wasn’t he too old for butterflies? He wanted to message you again but everytime he tried, he ended up overthinking it. Everything sounded forced or cheesy, and it was worse than any writer’s block. He threw his phone on the bed in frustration watching it bounce and land on the floor, before he grabbed it and pocketed it. Hopping around to get rid of his nerves, he decided to take a break from rereading the thread he already had memorized and check in with everyone. If his hangover was this bad he can’t imagine theirs.

Making his way back to the living room he found Taehyung now sitting on the floor, sleep still very evident on his features as he yawned and groaned. On the couch next to him sat Yoongi, holding an iced americano and staring into space. The rest were missing but he could hear a blender annoyingly whizzing in the kitchen.

“How’re you guys feeling this morning?” He asked as he sat across from Yoongi.

“This is why I don’t drink. Why did no one stop me?” Taehyung whined as he rose from the floor to leave, massaging his head. 

“We tried. You were very excited to try all the disgustingly sweet drinks the hot bartender was making for you.” Yoongi replied with a sigh. “How was your date, Namjoon? You glad I forced you to go to the bar to talk to her?” he snickered, sipping his coffee before exhaling loudly in contentment.

“Honestly, I owe you big time. She was… amazing. I don’t think I’ve talked to someone that comfortably in a while” Namjoon sighed wistfully.

“I’ll add cupid to my resume,” he deadpanned. “Is she tolerating you for another date?”

“Yeah. We’re getting dinner on Tuesday, but I want to message her now. Argh!” He ran his hands over his face in frustration. “What do I even say? ‘Hi I’m the guy who was too scared to kiss you all night so you had to do it for him, what’s your favourite colour?’” Namjoon was annoyed at himself. It’s bad enough that he was having writer’s block in his music, did he have to have it for something as simple as texting too? This was ridiculous.

“Or you could just ask her how’s her hangover today. Jeez. Do I have to draft each of your messages? Stop being a dumbass and text the person you like.” Yoongi scoffed, clearly over Namjoon’s sudden and uncharacteristic insecurities.

Namjoon gave a resigned sigh as he reached for his phone and wrote out exactly what Yoongi suggested. Hey, he was his hyung for a reason - he had a full 6 months of life experience on him.

Namjoon: Hey! Hope your hangover is not too bad today.

As soon as the message was sent, he started getting nervous. Tapping his foot incessantly while staring at his phone, willing it to buzz, annoying Yoongi enough to leave him alone on the couch in the process.

Y/N: Hi to you too! I actually don’t get hangovers so I’m doing great lol. What about you?

Namjoon: What do you mean you don’t get hangovers?

Y/N: I don’t know. Can’t get dehydrated if you’re always dehydrated!

Namjoon: That… makes no sense. Do I need to start reminding you to drink water?

Y/N: Only if you’re better than this app on my phone…

Namjoon: I can guarantee you I’m better than any app on this planet.

Y/N: Wow. Big claims! We’ll have to put it to the test I suppose.

Y/N: You never told me how you’re feeling. Oh and how’s Taehyung? Is he okay?

Namjoon: He’s doing fine. Made a pact to never drink again and if i’m being honest, I’m going to join him. I am shocked that your head is not exploding as well.

The messages continued easily after that, filled with updates of each other’s activities, playful flirting and even photos of dinner. By the time Monday rolled around, you had been messaging each other constantly, with no end to the conversation in sight and the only long pauses being when you were both asleep or working. It seemed like you would never run out things to talk about. Namjoon hadn’t messaged someone this frequently since he got out of his last relationship. It felt nice to relay his mundane day to day events to someone and he found himself excited to hear about your mundane, like how you decided to mix two different types of bad coffee blends to make a shockingly worse one. He was surprised again at how fast he felt comfortable around you. It was even starting to scare him a little - he only knew you for three days and it felt like he had known you forever! What was this weird spell you had on him?

The conversation Monday, however, was fairly sparse, and Namjoon was eager to set up plans for the next day, so that night he decided to call you.

After the first three rings, he was overthinking his decision. Maybe it was too soon to call? Maybe you didn’t like talking on the phone? What if it went to voicemail? Would he have to leave a message? What would he say? His inner monologue was quickly halted at the sound of your voice.

“Hello, this is Y/N” you sounded distant, almost too formal. He felt nervous.

“Hi… uh... this is Namjoon. Is this a bad time?”

“Oh Namjoon! Sorry I didn’t check who called when I picked up!” Relief washed over him at the change of your tone. “Sorry one sec can you hold on.” he heard you say as your voice got mumbled. He waited while he heard you talk to someone about proposals and deadlines. Were you still at work? He checked his watch - it was 10 pm. He didn’t know whether to be impressed by your work ethic or worried that you were overworking.

“Hi sorry about that! How are you?” He relaxed at your airy tone and smiled.

“I’m good. Are you still at work?”

“Yeah it’s only like 7 so it’s no big deal. I usually leave around 8” Were you serious?

“Y/N… It’s 10:04…” He was shocked at how nonchalant you sounded, and suddenly he had his answer - he was worried, not impressed. He had known you for three days and already you were setting his caretaker alarm off. He wanted to scold you for being careless and overworking, like he’s used to doing for the boys, but he knew it was too soon. He doesn’t even know why he’s feeling that way all of a sudden and tried to suppress his protective instincts.

“No it’s not! It’s…” He could hear your voice going further away as he imagined you moving the phone in front of you to check the time. “Oh shit you’re right. What the hell? Okay sorry I’m gonna put you on hold again.” Before he could say anything he heard your voice again, distant again but loud. “Oh my god. Guys, it’s 10pm. Go home! Why did nobody tell me? No it doesn’t matter we can do that tomorrow. Please go home. Pack up now! You too Siwon, don’t worry I’ll go home after I get off the phone. See you!” He smiled at the sternness of your tone - it reminded him of a teacher dismissing class.

“Sorry about that. I didn’t realize I overworked my team. Had to send the troops home” you laughed and Namjoon felt his heart flutter. 

“I don’t wanna keep you from going home. I can call you back once you get there” he offered. He felt bad that you were staying in an empty office on his account.

“Oh don’t worry about it. It was a lie to get Siwon off my back. I’m probably gonna be here till like 1 or something. I still have to get this done” you said matter-of-factly, like it was the most normal thing in the world. He knew that tone fairly well, having used it multiple times himself when he locked himself in his studio, running on nothing but coffee and energy bars.

“Okay I know we’ve only just met and we have our first date tomorrow, but do you want some company?” He asked before he could stop himself. The line was silent for a bit, and he felt self conscious, scared that he had overstepped and driven you away. Before he could check his phone to see if you had hung up you spoke.

“It’d be pretty boring for you to watch me just type away. Are you sure? It’s pretty late.” He was sure his cheeks would hurt from how wide he smiled.

“It’s not a problem at all. I was going to work tonight too.” He wasn’t. “We can just work together. I’ll bring food. Did you eat yet?” his words tumbled over each other.

“How very college of you.” He could hear you giggling on the line. “Now that I think about it - I’m starving.”

“Okay text me the address, I’ll be there soon.”

He had never been this excited to pretend to work.

  ____________________________

He spotted you as he walked through the doors of the 13th floor, pepperoni pizza in hand. You were sitting at a long desk near the middle of the room. He was surprised as he expected you in an office, but he found you typing away at your desktop. Your hair was tied up in a bun and you were dressed in an oversized beige t-shirt, eyebrows furrowed head bopping to the hip hop track playing through the speakers. You seemed to be in your own little world. He felt like he was spying on you as he leaned against the door watching but he also liked seeing how you acted when you thought no one was watching. He was about to announce his presence when the track changed to a Childish Gambino one and you whooped and started to rap along.

You were now fully head banging and rapping the verse at the top of your lungs. He would be impressed by your fairly good amateur skills if he didn’t find the entire scene so endearing. His heart was doing somersaults as he watched you now fully engrossed in the song, typing forgotten as you got up and started to pretend you were on stage, an imaginary mic in your hand asking haters if they “eatin’ though”. You looked so adorable that he couldn’t help but squeal a little “cute!”

That’s when you saw him, eyes wide. He felt a little bad when he saw how embarrassed you looked, immediately stopping and slapping a hand to your mouth before bursting out in nervous laughter. He could write a whole album with that laugh. Oh he was so whipped, he thought to himself as he made his way to you.

“You know you’re not half bad!” He exclaimed as he set the pizza on the table, pulling a chair next to yours and settling down.

“Do you think your fake compliments will save you from the fact that you were spying on me?” you asked, crossing your hands across your chest, pretending to scowl but failing to.

“First, real compliment. Second, would pizza save me?” He opened the box and proudly smiled, loving the way your eyes lit up as you reached for a slice.

“Yes it will!” you exclaimed as you took your first bite, lightly moaning at the taste. “But erase that memory from your brain please.”

“Nope. Never. It was the cutest thing I’ve ever seen and I’m going to save it forever” he said as he also started on his slice. You pouted up at him, cheeks puffed and it took all the self-control he had to not kiss it off your face. He hadn’t felt this way in so long, it was like you were his first crush. Trying to control his pulse, he asked “What are you working on so late?”

“Oh I have a proposal due for a meeting tomorrow at noon and I’m only halfway through it.” you frowned wistfully at the screen as if willing it to type on its own.

“Can I help?” He asked, knowing fully well that he couldn’t. He just had an overwhelming urge to make that frown disappear.

“You being here is help enough,” you smiled sincerely as you looked at him and he felt his heart explode, a blush creeping on his cheeks as he smiled bashfully. “What are you working on?”

“I have a few songs I have to finish the lyrics for. Been procrastinating” he rubbed the back of his neck as he pulled out the notebook from his back pocket.

“Can I help?” you echoed his question to which he echoed your response grinning. He wasn’t lying though. Even though he had planned to not really work, as the night progressed he found the change from his usual writing spot inspiring. Sitting next to you, the sound of the keyboard clicking was soothing leading to words pouring out of him. He filled pages as he stole glances at you concentrating on your proposal, tongue peeking from between your lips, still bobbing to the music which was now playing from your airpods instead of the speakers. He smiled at the sight, before focusing on his notebook.

After about an hour or so of hard work, he finished three songs that he had allotted himself the whole week to do. This was the most productive hour he had all month. Antsy for a break, he looked over at you and found you staring at him, a hand under your chin. As he met your gaze you smiled.

“You’re really hot when you concentrate. Has anyone ever told you that?” you commented. He was taken aback by your remark, heart fluttering at your smirking face. Not missing his chance and spurred on by the comment, he scooted closer in one sweep till your knees touched and you were face to face.

“You’re one to talk. I couldn’t stop looking at you this past hour.” Gazing into your eyes, he was amused to see your smirk disappear as it was now your turn to be shocked. He reached out and tucked a stray hair behind your ear letting his hand linger, enjoying the way you sighed as he did. “Can I make good on my promise now?” He whispered, his face centimeters away, looking at your lips. The way you bit your lower lip made him want to take you there and then. The desk looked big enough. Hell, even if it wasn’t he could make it work.

“Promise?” you whispered as he watched your eyes flutter to his lips.

“To kiss you first...” Too impatient to wait for your answer, he brought his lips to yours, relishing how soft they felt under his own. He was thrilled at you returning the kiss, deepening it as you grabbed the collar of his shirt to bring him closer just like you did after the party. He was beginning to think this was your signature move, and he’d be lying if he said it didn’t immensely turn him on. He moved his hand cupping your face to rest on your neck and he could feel your heartbeat mimicking his. He put his other hand around your waist pulling you closer, wanting to be as close to you as he could get. He traced his tongue over your lips, his head cloudy with endorphins as you opened your mouth inviting him in. He had never tasted something so euphoric, his tongue exploring yours in a rush.

He could feel you pushing forward as he leaned back and allowed you to straddle his lap, your legs on either side of the chair. As soon as you were on his lap, he pulled you closer, both arms around on your hips, your chest flushed with his. He kissed the side of your mouth as he made his way down your jaw to your neck. You smelt like vanilla mixed with a fresh flower garden, and he was sure this smell was better than any drug in the world. He could hear your breathy moans as he sucked where your neck met your collarbone, licking to soothe it before moving further. He wanted to taste all of you. Your hands were in his hair and each tug made him groan into you, making him harder. He could kiss you like this forever. He wanted to save this moment so he could come back to it and relive it. He traced his hands up and down your sides, moving under your shirt but remaining on your waist, enjoying the feel of your soft skin.

“Namjoon… Namjoon... slow down” he heard you say breathlessly as he felt a slight push. He looked up at you, your eyes half lidded and lusty as you grabbed his face and brought it to yours. You were sending him mixed signals, but he didn’t care as long as he could keep kissing you.

“We have to slow down or I’m going to want to fuck you right here.” You whined as you both came back up for air, but you kissed him again nevertheless. Hearing you say that made him want to do anything in his power to make that happen.

“I don’t mind, baby,” he said against your lips, kissing you with urgency, biting your lower lip and pulling it gently to elicit another moan from you. To his disappointment, you seemed to have better self-control than him as you pushed him back, both of you panting as you struggled to catch your breath. He moved his hand back to your hips tracing little circles, feeling comforted by you smoothing his hair you had pulled earlier.

“There are cameras here. I’d rather not make a sex tape on our first date.” You giggled as you pointed to the black sphere in the corner of the room. He had never hated the obsession buildings had for security more, but the crudeness of your comment made him laugh. He had almost forgotten this was your first date, it felt like he had kissed you a thousand times before. You tasted like the relief of an awning in the middle of a summer downpour.

“I think we need to cool down,” you say as you climb off of his lap. “Let’s go.”

He followed you as you led him to the little kitchenette near the end of the room, unable to resist the urge to wrap his hands around your waist in a back hug. He knew he was being too clingy for a first date, but the way you giggled and put your hands over his gave him assurance.

“Lemonade, coke, or water,” you asked as you peered into the fridge.

“You.” He smirked kissing your neck, feeling bold off of the high from your makeout session. 

“Joon!” you pretended to sound scandalized as you turned in his arms, smiling warmly. The nickname made his heart swell. It added a familiarity that he didn’t know he missed from you.

“You haven’t called me Joon before. I like it” he smiled as he pecked your lips.

“Hey! We are cooling down! No kissing! Now pick” you chided and Namjoon couldn’t help but wonder if you were this assertive in bed too, a million scenarios playing in his head. Okay, you were right, he needed to cool down.

“I’ll just have water, thanks,” he said as he grabbed the bottle you passed him, opening and gulping half of it. He hadn’t realized how thirsty he was for something other than you. You both made your way to the tables, sitting across from each other.

“So did you finish your proposal?” He asked trying to cool himself but failing as he noticed you running the cold water bottle against your neck, the beads of condensation dripping on your shirt. He cleared his throat as he tried to focus his attention on your eyes, a mantra of stay focused playing in his head.

“Yes! Finally! It’s perfect.” you smiled proudly and somehow he felt a wave of pride too. “What about you? Made any progress?”

“Actually yes. I kind of finished my entire week’s writing in that one hour” he was still amazed by his own progress.

“Okay, Mr Overachiever” you joked and he chuckled.

“To be honest, I didn’t think I’d be able to write anything, but I don’t know your presence is kind of soothing. It helped me focus.” Watching your smile grow wide, he continued, “I’ve been having pretty severe burnout this past month and it has just been hard to put down my thoughts, even non-lyrical ones.” He fidgeted with the water bottle as he looked at it, avoiding eye contact.

He didn’t know why he was telling you this. He recalled when he told you about his struggles as a leader during your first conversation. Somehow being around you led him to vomit out his feelings. It was… unlike him. Namjoon was usually not this honest on dates, or relationships, as much as he would hate to admit it. That’s the reason he broke off his last one. He felt bad lying to her about a busy schedule when he just wanted to be alone. She would have understood, she was kind and thoughtful, but it just felt easier to lie and not put the effort in to explain his thoughts. Even when they broke up, he lied and told her that it was because he couldn’t handle being in a relationship at the moment, when in reality things had cooled off a while ago and he felt guilty as his feelings faded.

He felt your hand reach out and grab one of his, intertwining your fingers. He felt comforted by the gesture as you rubbed your thumb across him before you spoke two words that warmed his heart. “I understand.”

“You know it’s hard to work at full speed all the time. It’s okay to not be at a hundred all the time. The valleys feed the peaks” you continued. It was a simple remark, but it sounded surprisingly poetic to him. He hadn’t felt this understood outside of the boys for a long time. It was refreshing. It was terrifying. He resisted his natural urge to run and hide.

“Are you speaking from experience?” he asked, needing to divert the attention away from his own vulnerabilities.

“Yeah. I had it pretty tough a couple of years ago. Too much pressure from myself, too many expectations. Led to too many vices and panic attacks” you shrugged as you continued and he squeezed your hand to comfort you. “It creeps up from time to time but my therapist and I have it handled” He looked at you in awe. You hadn’t given him a throwaway answer or switched the limelight back at him. You wasted no time in being as vulnerable as him, if not more. He knew at that moment that regardless of where this thing went, he wanted you to know you better.

“Thank you for being honest.” He brought your hand to his lips and kissed it gently. It was an intimate gesture but he wanted you to know how much he appreciated your words - how much he appreciated you - in that moment. You both sat in comfortable silence for a little while, playing with each other’s hands that were still intertwined, till one of you yawned loudly causing the other to giggle. With the weight of the conversation lifting, you both fell back into playful banter as you decided to pack up and call it a night.

“Do you want me to walk you to your car?” Namjoon asked, wanting to drag the night on longer despite it already being almost 2 am.

“Don’t judge me but I actually don’t know how to drive. I was just going to cab back.” he saw you giggle bashfully as you pulled your backpack over your shoulders.

“Oh, no judgment here! Me neither” he laughed. Why does everyone think it is such a big deal to not drive? It’s better for the environment! “Do you want to take one together? I don’t really want you to ride alone this late.” He rubbed the back of his neck, hoping he didn’t come off as if he was trying to dictate what you did.

“I’d really like that,” you said as you walked towards the elevators. He held your hand as you both got on, liking the way you moved closer to him at that. 

In the cab you both sat closer than necessary, his arm wrapped around you as you both made plans for your scheduled date later that day, trying not to doze off. When the cab stopped all too soon at your apartment, he kissed you gently as he told you how much he enjoyed your company.

That night laying in bed, his heart felt full as he read your goodnight message. He was sure of it now. He really wanted you in his life.

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#bts fic #bts x reader #bts fanfic #bts rm scenario #bts scenarios #bts #bangtan #bangtan sonyeondan #namjoon x you #namjoon x reader #namjoon fluff #bts rm #bts namjoon #rm x reader #rm fluff #usersuhdays

[cognitivefunk]

Alright. So this was a prompt for a large orc male/lithe elf male on the AI Dungeon website. The AI has a tendency to mimic the way you write, but it’s not perfect, so this is my heavily edited “remastered” version. Please take the warning seriously, otherwise I hope you enjoy~ Also, I’m sorry in advance. 

Title: Don’t Bite Off More Than You Can Chew POV: Second person, male reader  Rating: Explicit, 18+, R18 Warnings: Dubcon bordering noncon, plot what plat, smut, size difference, written to make you feel a little uncomfortable, asphyxiation, deep throating Word Count: 2,498

You had just finished bathing, preparing yourself for a long night. Your current job wasn’t glamourous, but you managed to get through the week without much hassle. It had been a few months since you began working in a whorehouse as a prostitute to pay off a debt you owed the owner after a deal had gone south. Today, your boss has sent you to the private rooms at the back of the building to serve a customer's requests. It was always a surprise who you would be serving, but you had resigned yourself to your duties. Tonight's customer's name is Ongrash. You enter the lavish room wearing nothing but a pair of lacy lingerie bottoms and white high heel shoes. The soft clicking of your shoes alerted the man of your presence. You close the door and turn around to greet your suitor. Seated on the bed is a tall, muscular orc man with very masculine facial features and a hairy chest. He is sitting with his legs open wide, wearing nothing but a loincloth that leaves very little to the imagination.

The orc begins to beckon you toward him with a smile as he gently rubs the tent forming in his loincloth, eager to have his way with your body. You approach the orc slowly, as you have no choice but to obey his commands. As you approach him, he grabs your wrist and grips it firmly in a bruising manner. He leans forward, his face pressing against yours as he whispers, "Oh, I’m going to have a lot of fun with you tonight, little one."

You jerk forward, pulled by the orc's strong grasp. His hot breath splays across your cheek and you shiver in anticipation, lips curling into a sultry smile. You had noticed his name on the placard outside the room and mulled over whether to call him by name or by a sexier title. You decide on the former, figuring he was the type of man to get off on hearing his own name. "But of course, Ongrash. I will be your pet for the night," you coo, crawling onto the large orc man's lap slowly, whilst sensually locking eyes with the beast of a man.  His cock strains against his loincloth as you grind against him, before he grunts, a primal sound fitting for such a beast.

"Feeling impatient?" you ask, trailing delicate fingers up his broad chest and across his strong shoulders. You lean forward, flattening your tongue and drag it up the side of the orc's neck, stopping to leave love bites along your path. You push down the churning sensation that threatened to bubble up in your stomach from the smell of him. He wasn't dirty, per say, but there was something very ...abrasive about his scent. Rolling your hips forward, you can feel his massive cock straining against the loincloth. It curved and pressed up against your ass. You made sure your movements were nice and slow, feeling adventurous as you riled him up.  "Let me help you with that," you whisper, as you reach down and unbuckle his belt. You pull the leather belt from the loops, and quickly wrap it around the orc's thick, muscular wrists.

"How does it feel? To be tied up by a filthy little thing, as small as me?" you coo, wearing a wicked, yet sensual grin as you tie the strong leather around the orc's wrists, effectively binding him. "Does it feel good?" You were sure he could break out of it if he really wanted to, admiring the rippling muscles, flexing under the strain of the makeshift binds. He was quiet, but there was a tension in the air, and you made mental note that he may not be the type to be into that sort of play. You caress his hands in yours gently, smoothing over the mistake. "That is...unless you want to take the lead," your voice trails off at the end of your sentence.

Ongrash growls, grabbing you by the hips with his large hands as he lifts you up, turning your body towards him which causes you to tilt sideways.

Laughter fills the air as you let him lift you. You were light in his hands, and you noted how easy it was for him to maneuver you without breaking a sweat. You were going to have a fun night. Changing pace, whilst keeping the pleasure of your client into consideration, you slip out of his grasp and slide off his lap to settle between his legs. You come face to face with his erection, the only thing concealing it being the jagged piece of cloth. "What do we have here?" you tease, pulling the loincloth down to reveal the remarkably veiny, throbbing cock of the man before you. You lick your lips, fluttering your lashes up at the orc.  

"It looks like a certain slave wanted to see if his new master was as big as everyone said he was..." the orc snorted, grinning down at you with an expression that did nothing to mask his malice.

"And my, my. You don't disappoint," you reply, a little awestruck at his size. You were going to have to prepare before even thinking of fitting him inside of you. You open your mouth wide, using your tongue to cushion the bottom of his shaft as you wrapped your lips around what you could manage to fit inside. It was massive, but you were determined to give him a good time. You pull back, with a sucking motion, using your hands to stroke the base of his cock.  You smile up at him, before doing it again. And again. And again. You breathe through the motion to avoid getting too tired out, before you feel his hand at the back of your head.

You loosen your jaw, feeling the man's fingers threading through your silken hair. A single one of his hands was nearly the size of your entire head and he could easily break your skull if he used his full force or gripped you in anger. But danger was part of the thrill, you told yourself. You let him guide your head, taking in a deep breath through your nose as he thrust his hips forward, pushing his cock towards the back of your throat. You had practiced enough to dull your gag reflex, but it still made the corners of your eyes tear up.  He groans, feeling the tip of his head nearing its intended destination. His hand grips at your skull as he holds you tightly against him, feeling the contractions of your throat constricting around his cock, pulling him in deeper.

You swallow around him, allowing your throat to massage the cock enveloped in your mouth. You raise your eyes to watch the orc give into his pleasure, his eyebrows knitting together, focused. It made you swell with pride that you were doing so well for your client. You breathe carefully between thrusts, drool beginning to pool and drip down your chin as the man continues to deep throat you. His nails dug into your scalp, tugging at your hair with a pleasurable strain.  He spoke no words, suddenly gripping your head tighter before immediately thrusting deeply, forcing his length down your throat.

As he pushed further in, your nose was nearly nestled in his pubic hair. The gargantuan size of his manhood was starting to make it difficult to breathe as he pushed it as far as it would go. You tapped on his thigh, hoping to get his attention so you could pull back and breathe. He was holding your head in place as the tears spilled over your eyes, streaming down your cheeks. Your face was red from the lack of air.  You could hear his heavy panting as he continued to hold you down, your knees bit into the ground below, barely able to keep your balance as he fucked your mouth.

Reaching up, you grab at the hands on your head, trying to loosen his grip with an urgency that was growing in you. The room was starting to dim around the edges of your vision, and you didn't know how much more you could take before passing out. His cock twitched in your throat, pressing down on your windpipe with its weight. You hum loudly to get his attention, inadvertently sending a shock-wave of vibrations around his aching member.  He begins to thrust in your mouth with more force, slowly at first as if testing the waters. But before long he began to fuck your face without restraint, his hands felt like lead on your skull as he held you firmly in place.

Your dig your nails into his muscular forearms, both for balance and to try to push him off of you. It was exhilarating, nevertheless. Your heart was racing; you could hear the blood rushing in your ears and the choking noises you made as he ravished your throat. Your voice was going to be hoarse from the abuse your throat was taking. The drool from your chin dripped onto the floor below and you shakily tried to breathe as much as possible through your nose. The orc was far too large to be manhandling you like this without causing some damage. Determined, you grip him with more strength, trying to puncture his skin with your nails as you push back against him.  He was too strong and heavy to fight free from.

As his rhythm increased, so did the force of his thrusts. You fell backwards in what felt like slow motion, letting out a startled scream as you felt him rapidly thrusting inside your mouth.

'No you big oaf,' you thought to yourself as he followed suit, straddling your head as you lay sprawled out on the floor, ramming his cock into your mouth. Your scream, while painful for you, was only bringing more pleasure to the orc. You knew better than to bite down, caring more about your life than the money this would bring in. You hoped you were getting tipped after this was over. In your new position, he was able to push all the way in to the hilt, smothering your nose against his musk. You choked on his cock, saliva pouring down your chin at this point.  His hand wound around your hair, tugging and pulling on the strands, whacking his knuckles against the top of your head with each thrust.

The wet smacking noises mixed with your garbled choking noises from were the only sounds in the room.

You were dizzy, the room was spinning as continued to smack against your head. A part of you was thankful, as the pain from his ruthless tugging was the only thing keeping you conscious as you struggled to breathe, praying he would be done soon so you could fill your lungs with sweet, sweet air.  As though your prayers had been answered, he slammed into you hard, his member pulsating as it forced itself deep into your throat. You could feel his thick liquid coating your throat, filling your mouth with his essence.

You sputtered as the liquid shot down your throat, the volume of it forcing up and out of your nose and mouth. You did your best to swallow what you could as he slowly pulled out of your mouth and you collapsed fully onto the ground, coughing wetly and gasping for air. Cum dripped down your mouth and splattered against your chest, painting you in his seed. Your lungs burned with every breath and you wiped at your nose.  You heard the ruffles and shushes of his loincloth as he put it back on. You reached for a discarded cloth on the ground to wipe your face with, hoping to rid your nose of the disgustingly thick ejaculate.

You breathe a small sigh of relief, as he seemed to be satisfied with just a blowjob after the vaguely frightening ordeal had passed. You were worried he may actually break you with his lack of self-control. After all, he was using your body not out of love, but out of exchange of pleasure for coin. You put on your best smile, cleaning up and putting on a show, trailing your index finger through the cum he spilled on your chest and licking off the excess like it was the best thing you had ever tasted. "You sure know how to treat a guy, huh?" you teased, your voice husky and raw.

He grunted, thrusting his hips forward, "My belt, slave," he commanded. It would seem he wasn't a man of many words.

Walking toward the orc, you unwrap the belt from his wrists that had popped open long ago, pressing your body against his as you carefully looped it around his hips, securing his loincloth through the loops. You smile up at him, batting your long lashes. "So...about that payment?”

The orc looks down at you, his eyes obscured by his bushy brows. He grunts, a deep sound that could almost be called a laugh.

You flash him a dazzling smile, leaning up on the tip of your toes to press a kiss affectionately against his shoulder.  "It was wonderful. Thank you," you say, leaning back to look into his eyes.

The orc looks at you, his face showing nothing but lust and desire.

Your smile falters for a moment, hoping you hadn't reignited his flame. You titter into your hand gracefully, giving him a rehearsed bashful look. "You'll have to pay double if you want to go for a second round, big boy."

He lets out a hearty laugh, his body slumping forward. Your smile falters again, as you come face to face with the orc, looking into those dead eyes and catching a glimpse of something else there. Something darker.  Something hungrier.

His laugh reverberated in your chest like rolling thunder and you swallowed thickly, the taste of his essence still thickly coating your tongue. Your face shifted back into your polite, subservient role, but your body was tense under his hungry gaze. His eyes burned into you, and you couldn't help but wince as he ran his finger down your cheek. "I'll be back," he says, his voice gruff and heavy with lust.

Your eyes fell shut as he stroked his finger down your cheek and you let out a shaky breath. You didn't want to seem unprofessional, but the orc was as rough as he was massive and you would have to clear your schedule for him if he did indeed intend to make good on his statement. A part of you was turned on at the thought of being destroyed by his cock, but the rational part was afraid of the recovery that would follow shortly thereafter.

With a heavy groan, the orc withdrew from you. "I'll be back," he says again, walking past you and out through the front door.

#usagiwrites #smut #oc I guess #I took out the character descriptors to leave more to the imagination #tbh the way the elf is described makes me think of Link from BoTW lolol #I am so sorry for this creation

[littlebitlizbit]

The Two Year Miracle

Tinker...  Where do I begin? With his spirit, his sass? His grumble meow, or his cooing purr? The crook at the top of his long broken tail, or his blown out oracle eye? There are so many feelings and emotions that his name brings up, and I hope that I have the words to get them out right...

So right, where do I begin? I guess at the beginning. 

About two and a half years ago my household lost one of our cats to old age. Our other cat, Rufus, was never a huge fan of his late sibling, but he was still used to anothers cat’s company. I wanted to bring him in a new friend, but knew that financially it would be a stretch. I have a rare genetic disorder that gets in the way of full time work, and vet bills, especially for older cats, tend to add up... but still, Ruffie needed a companion.        I started to look online at some of the various animal rescues around the lower mainland, and stumbled across Katie’s Place. It is a no kill cat rescue, that offers a unique option for those looking to adopt.      It’s called the Permanent Foster Program. This program exists to get the most in need cats into a household asap. It applies to the senior cat’s, in Kate’s Place care, that have non life threatening issues. The hardest part about adopting out older cats is people’s concerns over vet bills, and this is where Katie’s place differs from most shelters... They work with vets who continue to see the cats for the remainder of their lives, and Katie’s Place covers any fees or medication costs.           I started looking through their cats available for adoption gallery, and finding out which ones were available for the PM program. There were at least three that could have been a good fit, so a friend and I headed out on one of their open house days to meet the candidates.            I remember thinking how smart of a set up they had, to house the rescues in a comfortable way. You pass through a safety gate and into a comfortably lit portable, with rooms running down either side of the hall, each with an connected covered patio. Instantly we were greeted by the “hall cats.” We entered the first room, that comfortably housed about 6 rescues. One of the PF cats was sleeping in her bed, and she perked up as I put my arm near her bed. She was a beauty white fluffy girl, who was sweet, but wasn’t a fan of other cats, so not the best fit. As we popped in and out of the rooms, I had my eye out for one named Smigeon, a black fluffy guy who sounded chill on the website. He was in one of the rooms towards the back, on the porch, a volunteer informed me. On the way through to him, my eye was draw to this miserable looking cat, with very obvious sight issues. He was bald and covered in scabs, raising his paw cautiously in front of himself from on top of a cage within a cage. There was something about him... but not wanting to startle him, I let him be, and continued through the door to find Smigeon snoozing utop a cat tree. He instantly rolled over and gave me the sweetest look and started purring at my pets. I was sold, and went to tell the woman in charge that I would like to take him. As I was petting some cats nearby her and another volunteer, I overheard the volunteer tearfully say “I don’t want him to die in here.” I went over and asked what was up, and was told that Smigeon came in with another cat, but this other cat was super sick, and had a stomach tumour, and wasn’t expected to last more than two weeks. I called home and asked my partner if he trusted me, and he said yes. I told him we were getting two cats. Turns out the mostly blind scabby guy was Smigeon’s old house mate. I knew that I could give him so much love in the time he had left, and though it would hurt, resigned myself to this short term guy. I was told to really have a think about it overnight, and was there the moment they opened the next day with carriers ready to bring them home.        It was as if this scabby cat, this Tinker, knew we were coming for him. He was off of his smaller cage, and at the mouth of his big one with his paw outstretched towards me the moment I walked in. My friend helped cage up Smigeon while I got Tinker into his. Smige fell asleep in his cage on the way home, while Tinker, sat half in his cage, half on my lap, staring either at me or out the window. He could see a bit...but not much. 

And then the boys were home.

Smigeon pranced around the house like he was the happiest prince. He LOVED water, like would let the tap drip on his head he loved it so much (even tried to jump into the bath with me once.) Rufus was wary of Smigeon, there were a couple hisses, but for the most part didn’t seem to mind him.      Tinker was another story... the poor guy walked into walls and chairs, but could see at least a little bit and had great hearing. Rufus was mesmerized by him. Like he could tell that something was wrong with this guy, so wasn’t aggressive in the least bit. If Tinker hissed, Ruffie would just quietly sniff near him, and give him space.       That first night, all the cats were on the bed. Tinker couldn’t jump up on his own, so I made him a set of makeshift stairs, that he ended up being really good with. He then marched, with all the grumpy sass of an old man, onto my chest, and promptly curled himself around my neck, falling almost instantly and deeply asleep. I knew then and there that this cat had my heart, in a way that I’d never experienced before. 

Sure, I’ve had some great cats, amazing cats, sweet silly cats. One of my favourite cats growing up was exceptional, Taz. He was a rescue, a smushed faced himalayan persian, who would jump from the floor up to my stomach then from stomach to shoulder and perch there. He’d give me kisses and hugs, sat on my lap every meal and whenever I was on a couch. He slept at my feet and used to love to sit on my chest and just stare at me, purring. He was the cat that made me fall in love with grumpy old man cats... but he has long since passed and I didn’t think I’d ever get that lucky again. 

I was wrong. 

As the days went by, Tinker thrived. Him and Rufus seemed to be bonding exceptionally fast, and he would devour any food that was put in front of him. He loved fresh water, and would drink loudly while padding the floor, and then would put his paw right into his mug. Oh yes, he drank out of a Batman mug, he wouldn’t drink out of a bowl, but the mug was his jam.         Smigeon, our clean, other than being older, bill of health kitty, on the other hand, was not doing well. No matter what I’d put down for him food wise, he wouldn’t eat. Not even fresh cooked meat or bacon. I started to “baby bird” him and would fill a thick syringe up with moist food, and feed him that way. He ate a tiny bit of dry food one day, and he’d drink tons of water. After a week I brought him and Tinker in for a check up, since Tinker’s skin condition didn’t seem to be getting any better, and Smigeon was getting weaker. Turns out Tinker, and now my house, had ringworm. But poor Smidge, the vet wanted to keep overnight, to see if he’d improve after being on an IV. I was called the next day by the vet, Dr.Gold, who told me that they did some more tests on Smigeon, and it turned out that his entire body was riddled with tumours. He was weak and in pain and the vet said there was nothing they could do, and that we needed to let him go. I rushed out in time to hold him, give him lots of loves and pets, as he crossed the rainbow bridge in my arms. It was hard, and unexpected, but I’m thankful that he at least got to have a final couple of weeks in a loving home. 

           He and Smigeon did not come from a safe/loving home. Tinker had scarring that showed not only a once broken tail, but also ribs. Some of his teeth were broken, and he wasn’t born blind, but one of his eye was completely blown out. Both cats were surrendered after a raid, completely matted and dehydrated. It boils my blood to think that some people can be so cruel...             Back home, now Rufus had contracted ringworm, and both Tinker and him had to be quarantined in the spare room, while we disinfected the entire house. Tinker was on cold meds, as well as ringworm meds, and it took me a few times to figure out the best way to administer it. He would go full on feral if I tried to pinch his mouth open at all, but the liquid meds seemed to be the easiest, while I held him with my arms and legs. Both boys had to get bathed once every 2  to 3 days for about two months, and we had to completely disinfect their room a couple of times a day.                     During this time I would go, in my massive Batman onesie, and just lay down with them. Rufus was never big on pets and cuddles, but everytime Tinker would march straight up my chest, and lay claim to the real estate around my neck. My guess is that my breath on him from there was comforting, like he knew he was safe... The two boys became inseparable in that time, and Ruffie actually started to want tactile love. Rufus had never liked to sleep near any other cats, but the two of then now cuddled almost constantly. 

         Finally, after getting the final check/ok from the vets, the boys quarantine was over. (Funny side story, during that visit Tiker needed to have bloodwork done... I could hear him yowling down the hall, and when they brought him back in the vet tech was wearing a fully padded suit, and plastic neck and face guard. She basically threw him at me...poor feral guy, but was calm the second he was back in my arms) Tinker was the first out of the room, slowly but surely relishing in his new freedom. Rufus was a little more cautious upon exiting the room, but cautious is kind of his default. 

     Slowly but surely more of Tinker’s personality started to come out, as he blossomed. We’d now had him for about three months, and he was showing no signs of slowing down...in fact quite the opposite. After watching him one morning accurately swat at and chase a fly, I realized how good his hearing was. The pet store near me sold these crinkle balls, that made the slightest noise while being batted around. As soon as I dropped it for him, a new Tinker was unleashed. He chased and batted around that thing with the energy and accuracy of a kitten. I couldn’t believe it. Neither could the vet. On his next check up they were pleased at his weight gain, and the fact that his fur was starting to grow back in (the exact same shade as Rufus, who knew!?). His tumour wasn’t growing, but it also wasn’t shrinking, so he was put on some pain meds to make him a little more comfortable. He became even more active after that. It’s funny, he would sing, literally sing and coo to his crinkle ball wherever he would catch it and carry it around in his mouth all proud like. If he’d lose it under some furniture, we’d have to go on our hands and knees around the house to see what he lost it under, because he would cry if he couldn’t find it. Finally I bought him a pack of 12 online, so that if he lost it, we could just pop him out another. Well that didn’t work out.... turns out this one crinkle ball in particular was his baby, and no matter what, we couldn’t trick him into a different one.

As winter started to melt into spring, and we started to let Tinker out into the front yard. It’s completely fenced in, and I'd sit with him while he explored, sniffing everything he could, with a lust for life.           When I was home (Which was most of the time) he would be my constant shadow. I sew, as well as make jewelry, and whenever, wherever I had a project on the go, Tinker would be right there beside me. I ended up getting him these vintage stools covered in padded fabric, and he would snooze lazily on them beside me as I worked away, occasionally waking up for some fresh water and head pets. Him and Rufus were still super close, cuddling for hours every day, an absolute first for Ruffie. He adopted a small Batman stuffy of mine, and started cuddling with it daily. The days that I had to go to work, he would give me sass all morning (if I put on makeup that seemed to be the give away that I was going out) and then come trotting to the door, as fast as he could, upon arriving back home. He did this hilarious thing when he was upset with me for going out... he’d crawl onto the bed and start biting the blanket. The first time he did it I thought he was stuck or something, but then I tried to pull the blanket away, and he grumble meowed. He would do it anytime I had to go out of town (The longest I was ever away was three nights) and usually when I’d come home from work. It turned out to be like a game of tug of war for him. 

 Before I knew it, a whole year had gone by with this little miracle. I was falling more and more in love with him as time went on, all the while painfully aware that every moment with him was a gift. He started to get a bit more grumbly, and eventually started developing mouth ulcers, apparently something common in cats with stomach cancer. During a check up the vet said it might be time to let him go, but he was still super active. Still eating and drinking a ton, still purred when getting love, and still played actively with his crinkle ball. We decided to treat the ulcers as best we could, and upped his CBD dose. The vet said that if the ulcers didn’t shrink with this treatment, that it might be time to let him go. I knew his lust for life, but alo didn’t want him to suffer. I remember getting him home, and telling him that I would fight for his life as long as he did. I know that cats can’t understand our language, but I feel like some of them are really excellent at picking up intent. He would always look me square in the eye, with whatever vision he had left, and seemed to be intently listening. He would talk back often too, it was pretty incredible.              That week he upped his active factor... Played more than usual, wanted to go outside more, cuddled a ton, and was just an overall super happy to be alive cat. I sent the vet videos of him from that week, and she couldn’t believe it. She agreed that this was a cat who still had living to do, so ulcer meds got added to the pain med list, and he kept on going. 

I started working from home, and that really pleased Tinker, though he became even more bonded to me than I thought possible. It got to the point where I'd open the bathroom door, and there he’d be, sitting like a patient dog, waiting to crawl back into my lap. He took his meds like a champ, and just like that, we were passing the two year mark of bringing him home.

Things with him were mostly great, but he was starting to slow down little by little.

 He started to pee on the floor once in awhile, around the litter box, rather than in it. He prefered to do his business outside, but if someone wasn’t around to take him out, he would let his displeasure be known this way. He started coming and asking for his pain meds at the exact time he was supposed to get them, if not a little earlier. He was getting slower and slower, and I knew that the time was near. I started to build up this steel wall of protection around my heart, because everytime I thought of life without him, I’d feel this overwhelming sense of loss, and couldn’t stop from crying uncontrollably. We took things a day at a time, and things were mostly normal, other than him getting a little slower. A couple of days after my birthday he was playing with his crinkle ball. The next day he didn’t eat much, but still drank a ton and went outside. The next day he didn’t eat anything, but still drank and went outside, albeit slowly. Three days after playing with his crinkle ball he had trouble standing. I looked him in the eyes and could see that my little miracle, the grumpy old man of my life, the cat love of my life, was done. I called the vet, and found out that our favourite Doctor was just getting home from Japan that night. The receptionist booked him in to be put to sleep the next day and I hoped, selfishly, that our she could make it in.            I was with him 24/7 that final week, and spent the last 48 hours on the floor with him. The morning of his appointment i brought him onto my chest, one final time onto the bed. He fell fast asleep, and I got to just feel his warmth and breath for about 4 hours. Finally, but way too soon, it was time. My friend picked me up, and we drove him out, as we had for multiple check ups, him wrapped in a towel on my lap. The wall of protection around my heart was suffering terrible fissures, but I knew that I had to be strong for him. I did my best not to cry or allow my energy to get upset, so as not to upset him. Thankfully Dr.Gold, our favourite vet, was able to make it in. She set aside a room fo us for an hour, dimmed the lights, and had a beautiful hand knit blanket for him. Remembering what he was like that last time he got poked with a needle, I asked them if I could go in the back with him to have the IV put in, and they were kind enough to just do it all right in the room. He didn’t even squawk when they administered it, which just solidified for us how done he was. We were offered more time with him, but I knew he was done, and every moment with him now was a selfish one. He closed his eyes for pets, then looked at me one final time, as the rainbow bridge opened in front of him. 

Afterwards I felt strangely numb, but also calm. I did what I had set out to do, two years previous, and was given so much more than I ever could have hoped for. As I’m typing this I’m crying, and have had to take multiple breaks. Knowing that such a special relationship is over, in these forms, has been harder than I’d care to admit. Being prepared to lose him from the get go hasn’t made grieving any easier. Greif is such a funny thing, that comes for you when you’re least expecting it. I’m bursting into tears much more than I’m comfortable with, but I know things will get easier with time. I’ll never stop missing him, but will always be forever grateful for every single bonus day we had together. 

      Rufus is doing ok now, though he is grieving too. His tail had a droop to it, and was yeowling the nights away... So I did what I did the last time he lost a sibling... He now has a new PF brother, Clue. I may not have much money, or energy, but I saw first hand the difference love and affection can have on a life. Clue is an all black fluffy guy, just like Smigeon was, and has asthma. He’s drooly and sweet, and him and Rufus have already started sleeping on the couch together. There is no way that Tinker could ever be replaced. That’s a hole in my soul that I don’t think will ever fully heal...but knowing that I’m making a difference in another life helps.  There are so many animals in need of loving homes, and not enough homes to house them. If you can, please consider adopting from our local shelter or animal rescue. I get the impulse for wanting a certain breed, but going to a breeder or a pet store is unnecessary. Just as many pure breeds cycle through rescues as not, so if you’re patient you can become the furrever home to the pet of your dreams, for a fraction of the price, and every fee paid to a rescue ensures that they can continue to help more animals.

My time with Tinker taught me to really appreciate life, and see things to be thankful for with crystal like clarity. He’s taught me compassion and patience on a new level, and gave me a lifetime's worth of cat love memories. 

Think of all that your next rescue could teach you, and start looking. Nothing would make me happier than if this story can inspire you to open your heart, and home. It can be hard, it can be painful, but I promise you, it’s worth it.  Please consider donating to Katie’s Place if you have the means. Or your own local animal rescue. http://katiesplaceshelter.com/ Thank you.

Love always,

Elizabeth xoxo

#animal rescue #adoptdontshop #testimonial #catlove #silver lining

[ezekieltheking]

Summary: You have come down with a cold and the king insists on taking care of his fair maiden. 

Author’s Notes: This is an excerpt from my King Ezekiel X OC fanfic which I have yet to finish or share on any website. From Chapter 6. The OC is named Amelia and she was a botanist with a background in homeopathic medicine. She was recruited into the Kingdom as the camp’s doctor. Mention of Dr. Carson is made, the character from Hilltop who was treating Maggie in the TV show during season 7 and 8.

Genre: Fluff (like always)

Featured Characters: Reader, King Ezekiel, Shiva

Playlist

The next morning, you wake up to a strange feeling. Your throat was dry and itchy while your nose was clogged. You didn’t want to believe you were sick; it’d been years since you’d caught a cold. You felt a bit better after brushing your teeth and washing your face, but the icky feeling continued to linger. Eventually, you drag yourself to the cafeteria for lunch. Per usual, you find an empty table to sit by yourself.

“Is this seat taken?” You hear Ezekiel ask. You shake your head without looking at him. Quietly, he sits across from you. “How did you rest?”

“Fine.” Again, you stare at your food.

“Amelia, look at me.” You do as you’re told. “You look ill. What happened out there?”

You shrug. “I guess I caught something.”

“You should be resting.”

“I’ve already slept. Dr. Carson is supposed to test me today, anyway, so I have to be there.”

“He will understand. Besides, it’s imperative to not spread the illness.”

“You make it sound like I have tuberculosis.”

“My apologies.”

“What are you going to do about it, anyway, keep me quarantined?” You offer a weak, playful smile.

“More or less.” You couldn’t tell if he was playing back with you. After finishing your meal, he tells you to follow him. He takes you through many hallways until he stops in front of a closed door. He opens it and gestures for you to enter first.

You noticed how regal the room appeared. “This is your room?” You ask.

“Yes. Is it to your liking?”

“What does it matter?”

“You’re going to be staying here. You’ve befallen the treacheries of the common cold and you need to be taken care of.”

“I can’t imagine you do this with everyone in The Kingdom who fall ill.” You respond coyly.

He walks up to you. “Only for the one I find most special.” You back up until you hit the bed. He follows.

A breath hitches in your throat. “You’re going to take care of me?” He nods. His hand reaches up to caress your cheek. Almost instinctively, you let yourself rest in his palm. He leans down and tenderly places a kiss on your forehead.

“Now, stay here and get some rest. I will bring Shiva to keep you company.”

“More like claw my face off.” You whisper raspily. You figured he didn’t hear you, but he chuckled as he left the room.

After leaving you alone in the room, you weren’t sure what to do. Did he really expect you to stay and slip under his covers? You bite your lip as you contemplate what to do. You had the two other options of either going home or finding another guest room. You glide your hands over his satin-like covers. He invited you into his room, his personal space. You imagine him unwinding at night; his shoulders relaxing, him undressing. Quickly, you shake the thoughts, wondering if they were inappropriate, but then you wonder if he’d ever thought of you that way too. You finally decide to get into the bed.

You tried to stay awake for him, but you couldn't help but fall asleep. He was right and you knew it, your body needed rest. It was late in the evening when you woke up again. You were probably going to sleep until the next morning if it wasn’t for Shiva’s roar. The orange light of the sun setting blanketed the room through the windows. Shiva got up, stretched her legs and laid back down on her own make-shift bed. She watched as you got out of bed and made your way toward her. Your steps were quiet and slow, wanting not to startle her. As you got closer, you noticed that she was chained to the wall. The leash connected to it was long enough for her to walk around a bit, but not enough for her to reach you on the bed. Gently, you called out her name to let her know you could trust her. You bend down and let her sniff your hand before petting her head. After a few moments, she started to make a type of purring sound. You took that as a good sign. You propped yourself up against the wall and began petting her stomach. You laughed as she rolled onto her back, asking for more. Eventually, you felt comfortable enough to detach the leash from her collar. She moved closer and laid her head upon your thigh. It was heavier than you thought; like having a six year old child sit on your lap.

The door suddenly opens. Ezekiel peeks his head in and frowns as he finds the bed empty. He walks further in, only to see you and Shiva together. He could feel his heart expanding from the scene before him. At this point, you were drifting in and out of sleep. It took you a moment to notice that he was in the room.

“I’m stuck. She’s been cutting off my blood circulation for about a half hour.” You joke with Ezekiel.

He smiles at you, then whistles to Shiva. “Come, Shiva. Come, here.” Immediately, she picks her head up from your lap. Just as fast, you feel the blood rushing down your leg. Ezekiel calls again, snapping his fingers. Shiva gets up and goes to him. She rubs her face on his leg as he pets her. “I like seeing you two together. I’m glad you aren’t afraid of her anymore.”

“Yeah, we had a talk. It was all just a misunderstanding.” You joke with him.

“It's nice to see your spirits up as well. How are you feeling?”

“A bit better.” You respond. He walks up to you and offers his hand. He pulls you up and walks you to his bed.

“I am glad to hear this. I talked to Dr. Carson and he’s fine taking over your job until you get better.”

“Thank you for talking to him.”

“You’re welcome. Well, I hope you are hungry. I was able to get the cook to make you a bowl of soup. We’ve had an abundance of tomatoes harvested from the garden, so he made tomato soup. I hope that is pleasing.”

You nod. “Well you’re in luck, because tomato soup is my favorite kind.” Ezekiel goes back into the hall to bring in the tray. He sets it on your lap before taking a seat next to you. “Thank you, Ezekiel, really.”

He nods. “Anything for the fairest maiden in the kingdom.”

“Don’t you get tired of talking like that? I know you weren’t raised in the 11th century.”

“No.” He states simply. “Well, sometimes.”

“It's just me you’re talking to. If you want to talk like Ezekiel and save the King, you can.” He doesn’t respond but acknowledges your words. “And also stop watching me while I eat.”

He plays offence. “I’m only making sure you eat everything.”

“You don’t have to worry about that, I will.” You laugh.

He took your empty bowl and told you that he wouldn’t be back until later. You chalked it up to kingly duties and even teased him a bit about it. You found yourself becoming more and more comfortable around him.

******

You wake up worse than the morning before. All of the symptoms came back and they came back strong. Your tongue was dry from breathing through your mouth all night. You spot a glass of water on the nightstand and reach for it, but your body wouldn’t move. You try again, but it was as if you were being pulled back. Looking down, you find an arm wrapped around your waist. You turn around, tracing the arm back to its owner. Last night when you fell asleep, Ezekiel wasn’t there, but he must have come in later.

Ezekiel is still asleep. You’d never seen him look so peaceful. It's now a memory forever etched in your brain. A tickle in your throat reminds you of the water. Gently, you slide out from under his arm. You take the glass and leave the room without waking him or Shiva. He’s probably going to scold you later for breaking his quarantine rule, but you needed to get into your stash and make some tea. After grabbing a couple of lemons and packets of sugar from the cafeteria, you head to your office.

You were on your second cup by the time you found yourself in front of Ezekiel’s door. You were about to knock, but thought twice, not wanting to wake him up. It proved to be a hopeless cause when you opened the door because he was already sitting up in bed.

“Where did you go?” He asks in a raspy voice. You were hoping he hadn’t caught your cold and that it was just his very attractive morning voice.

“I needed to make myself some tea. My throat was very dry.” You hold up your mug. “When did you get up?”

“A few minutes ago.” He replies while patting the side of the bed you slept in not even an hour ago. Immediately, you walk over to him. He slides back down under the covers and watches as you do the same. You weren’t sure what to do once in the bed. Should you two cuddle like before? You settled on laying on your stomach while propping yourself up on a pillow. He held his head in his hand as he laid on his side next to you. “Where are your thoughts, Amelia.”

#the walking dead #twd #king ezekiel #carzekiel #twd fanfiction #fanficiton #fanfic #imagines #oneshots #king ezekiel imagine #the kingdom #king ezekiel x reader #king ezekiel fanfiction

[nanonaturalist]

Yo! I’m an Anthropology student but I’m super fascinated with entomology n’ the like. Any tips for how to self study entomology/get started? How did you become the bug lover you are today?

Sup! I am a HUGE animal lover. Like, I don’t think you understand how much I love animals. Back when google image search was this crazy new thing, I would google things like “puffer fish” and literally start crying from how cute and precious they were. I don’t remember ever not liking bugs. I was bringing in caterpillars when my age was single digits, which I named and kept in shoe boxes, and who would invariably wander out and make a random cocoon somewhere.

STORY TIME! (what? you wanted a short answer? Sorry!)

… (actually check out this post from a while back [link] about tips for getting started, it was written for a high school student but most of the things I mention are good for all ages)…

Thing is, this was the point in history when you needed to use a card catalog to look a book up in the library. No idea what I’m talking about? That’s how long ago this was. If there was a book about bugs in the school book order form, I would ask for it (and sometimes I’d get one), but that was the full extent of my knowledge pool for things that we weren’t directly taught about in school. In 4th grade, we had a unit on marine animals (with the most amazing field trip on a research boat ever, omg the scuba divers brought up things for us to touch, and we got to look at plankton in the microscope eeeeeee!), and it was like I was reborn. I memorized everything we learned, including the taxonomy of cnidaria (jellies, anemones, corals) and strange eating habits of echinoderms (starfish, urchins). I got REAL into this stuff, to the point where 4 years later, I told anybody who asked me that when I grew up, I was going to get a PhD in Marine Biology.

There was just one problem. You can’t get a degree in any kind of animal biology without doing dissections or killing things. Remember, I’m an animal Lover with a capital L. I wanted to be a vegetarian starting at age 4 (parents said no, but I picked meat out of everything until I made it official at 12). So I gave up on biology real quick. Flash forward about ten years to 2006. I had graduated from college (with a psychology degree that cost me $70,000), was working soul-sucking jobs, and needed a hobby. But wait, DIGITAL CAMERAS ARE A THING! WOW! So I picked up “crappy nature photography” as a hobby. And what did I take pictures of with my First Ever Digital Camera when I bought one that summer?

I found this longhorn beetle on the hood of my car at a rest stop somewhere in the middle of nowhere, Missouri. But back in 2006… What are you going to do with pictures of bugs when you have no background in biology? I posted some on LiveJournal, and that was that. What kind of bug was it? I couldn’t even tell you that it was a beetle at that point. And when I was going through my old photos more recently, I couldn’t even remember seeing it.

I still took photos of basically everything I saw, but nothing ever really happened with them.

Who are these? At the time (photos are from 2006 to 2009), the most I could have told you was “dragonfly, wasp, spider, caddisfly larva.” Which is pretty good, I guess, but I didn’t even realize how much diversity I was missing out on by not going any deeper. 

Me + Slugs: Left - Banana Slug in Redwood National Forest, CA (2008); Center and Right - Chocolate Arion Slug at my apartment in Redmond, WA (2006)

Time passes, nature photos are taken. I will take photos of any bug I see, but I don’t intentionally seek them out and I never know what any of them are. Now flash forward to 2013, when I moved from Seattle, WA to Austin, TX. 

My mind was blown. The bugs were huge, strange, and EVERYWHERE. I NEEDED TO KNOW WHAT THEY WERE! But… It was still hard. At this point, looking things up on the internet was just what you did, but … what was I supposed to look up? “Giant screaming thing in my potted plant that looks like a leaf?” “Pile of handsnails?” I took pictures, shared them on Facebook (nobody used Livejournal anymore!), and went about my day. 

At this point, I had gone back to college to study engineering (I moved to Austin for grad school), and somehow ended up watching a lot of youtube. SciShow got me onto VlogBrothers, which got me onto The Brain Scoop (@thebrainscoop), which got me onto tumblr *waves*. And I was thinking some hard thoughts about what I actually wanted to do when I grew up because I was tired of soul-sucking jobs. Hey, I love museums (that’s actually where most of my science knowledge came from), so I started thinking about careers in science museums, and I followed UT’s collection page on Facebook. One day in 2015, they shared an event for a Bioblitz, sponsored by several groups associated with UT and Texas Parks and Wildlfie. What’s a Bioblitz? I had no idea. So I clicked. 

Basically, you take as many pictures of living things as you can. There were subject matter experts who would lead you on hikes and tell you what things were and how you can tell them apart (WAIT, WHAT?!?). The event required that you download this new nature app called iNaturalist (@inaturalist), which is where you would post the photos you took. With the data you posted from the app, other users of the website would identify your photos, and the state park we were at would use that data to create species checklists to track what occurred there. Your iNat account kept a permanent log of all of your observations. I tend to be extremely skeptical/resistant to new technologies and being told to do things, so at first I wanted to know what was wrong with the way I took photos NOW, I didn’t need some stupid website telling me what to do.

But then I started testing it out before the event.

Two of my first iNat observations (both butterflies). Left: Henry’s Elfin caterpillar; Right: American Lady butterfly. Links to iNat observations.

I had no idea where to start with identifying either of these, and the Henry’s Elfin caterpillar took me a few years to ID myself. But the American Lady? People told me what it was within hours of me posting it. Within hours.

About a week later, the Bioblitz happened. It was perfect. For the first time in my life, I was surrounded by people who were just like me. They wanted to go on long slow walks through nature, turning over logs and walking directly into ponds and poking at insects, all while taking photos of things and identifying them. I was spending the weekend with real life biologists and I was learning everything I could. And the things I saw?

HOLY CARP. Texas has dung beetles?! (top left) Parasitic wasps REALLY DO THAT? (braconid wasp cocoons on inchworm caterpillar, top right) Diving beetles?! (water scavenger beetle, bottom left) Giant fishing spiders?! (bottom right)

This event was the moment I “got started” with entomology. I regularly used iNaturalist, and in the process of trying to identify my observations with BugGuide.net [link], I quickly began to learn some of the “basics.” For example, stink bugs are a thing. So are green lacewings. And there are a LOT more kinds of spiders than orbweavers and wolf spiders (who knew?). I was so smitten with iNaturalist that I professed my love for all to read on tumblr [link] (all being… 3 people?). I used iNaturalist regularly, but still, unless I was on a bioblitz, I didn’t seek things out. I mentioned I was a grad student, right?

Then 2016 rolls around. I’ve had enough of school and drop master out of my program. I get a Real Engineering Job and Buy a House with a Yard. I started my new job when I was finishing up my thesis (probably not the best idea…) and so my back yard took on a life of its own. By the time I had finished my thesis, the grass was hip height, and the HOA had no rules about what my back yard had to look like, so I just never mowed it. And the bugs… oh man, the bugs. The bugs were good. By January 2017, I was getting more confident in my Bug Knowledge, and I was using iNaturalist every week. I had joined clubs centered around nature (Texas Master Naturalists and Travis Audubon). I signed up for a birding trip in Malawi. Then in April, I found a pile of butterfly eggs and a chrysalis. And the guy leading the Malawi trip (one of the directors at Travis Audubon) asked me to do an insect table at their outreach event. Then City Nature Challenge 2017 happened (and I am *very* competitive). And… uh… I guess I just never looked back?

The thing to remember here is: the more I learn, the more I realize I don’t know. What I love about iNaturalist is that I can create a time capsule showing what I did and didn’t know at the time. And what I didn’t know is… really amazing. I taught the entomology class for my Master Naturalist chapter’s training course this year, and I told the people in the class that one year ago, I didn’t know any of the things I was going to talk to them about. I know it sounds like I’m putting on a commercial for iNaturalist (which is actually exactly what I’m doing, I love that website), but besides the curiosity about nature that I had to begin with, iNaturalist is the single most important thing that has enabled me to nurture and grow my love for our invertebrate friends.

Through my use of iNaturalist, I have met real people and made real friendships. Many of the people I meet are professionally biologists, but there are just as many randos like me who crawled out of the internet to hang out with nature freaks. One of the great things about this community is there is no elitism, and even professional entomologists are just as willing to admit they have no idea what something is and will listen to me explain what I know, as they are to explain something I don’t know and answer my questions. The people I have met are absolutely awesome, and the general attitude people on iNat (online and in person) tend to have has really rubbed off on me. If someone I’m talking to doesn’t know something that tends to be commonly known (example: my coworker is a gardener, but hadn’t heard about the ant/aphid relationship), oh boy, it’s awesome, let me TELL YOU about ANTS fighting off PREDATORS so they can DRINK APHID PEE!!!

Above: Crematogaster ants farming keeled treehopper nymphs on sunflower SO THEY CAN DRINK THEIR PEE

One of the best things you can do to get more into entomology is to just be observant. Look. Notice patterns. Pay attention to relationships between “higher” and “lower” organisms. When you travel, look there too. What is different from home? What’s similar?

The other best thing: meet people. Find groups/clubs for people into nature. Go on hikes with entomologists. Go to “nature days” events (these are always geared towards kids, but ADULTS ARE WELCOME!). A lot of nature clubs and organizations are heavy on the retiree demographic, which means the meetings may not be easy to learn about online. I actually joined the Austin Butterfly Forum after hearing about it from the people I was sitting next to at a Travis Audubon event (Victor Emanuel’s autobiography had just published and he kicked off his book tour with a live interview in Austin), and I’ve met several new friends through ABF. 

I don’t even know how to explain it, but naturalists are a totally different flavor than any other person I’ve known. It’s like, there are other people who would rather be crawling through the swamp in 105°F weather for 8 hours straight than sit and watch TV? There are other people who will skip two meals and stay up until 2 am to get really good bug pictures? I mean, I can’t describe what it feels like to be slowly picking through the deserts of west Texas with 15 other people, when one of them yells, “SNAKE!” and suddenly EVERYBODY RUNS TOWARDS THE SNAKE AND IMPATIENTLY WAITS THEIR TURN TO HOLD HIM. 

I know this is long and maybe not entirely what you were expecting, @marichuu, but want to make sure that anybody reading this knows that if you like nature, even if you don’t know very much about it now, there are a ton of people like me and those weirdos up there who are so excited to share the world with you that you can’t even imagine it now. Want to stay online because you’re nervous about meeting new people? That’s great! Tons of us are online! But if you’re ready to put yourself out there and meet people in person, chances are, they’re awesome and will love answering your questions (and if they’re not awesome tell me and I’ll YELL AT THEM FOR YOU YOU DESERVE BETTER). 

Anyway. Bugs are awesome and I hope they think you are just as awesome. Also anthropology is super neat and there’s a lot of intersections with entomology [link] that you can look at from an interesting angle.

Posted June 4, 2018

#asks #informational #how to #teach yourself entomology #entomology #inaturalist #inat #citizen science #insect photography #nature photography #tl;dr #wall of text #tmi #nanonaturalist's life story #resources #bioblitz #naturalists #master naturalists #audubon

[mianaac-blog]

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Follow along with your regular conditioner. Mouthwash’s anti-fungal Houses aid prevent dandruff-leading to yeast from expanding. Here are a few myths about mouthwash that just aren’t accurate. Aspirin consists of exactly the same Lively ingredient (salicylic acid) as numerous medicated dandruff shampoos. Continue to keep flaking in Test by crushing two aspirins to a great powder and adding it to the normal volume of shampoo you use every time you wash your hair. The catechins in environmentally friendly tea are very good for burning Extra fat, as they free of charge Unwanted fat from Unwanted fat cells. They also battle free of charge radicals and end ailments. You could suppose the likelihood of erectile dysfunction increases with age, but this isn't the situation. Getting older will not essentially suggest you happen to be… A stiff neck results from slowed circulation and lymph stream to muscle mass tissues. Use distinction hydrotherapy—A fast blast of scorching, then cold water—to obtain the blood pumping once again. During the shower, to start with operate scorching water in excess of your neck for 20 seconds to enhance blood flow, then swap to cold for 10 seconds to constrict blood circulation. Dandruff reduction may very well be no farther away than your fridge, When you've got lemons readily available (which it is best to, given that they have many helpful makes use of!) Just therapeutic massage two tablespoons lemon juice into your scalp and rinse with h2o. Erectile dysfunction (ED) is commonly called impotence. It’s a affliction during which a person can’t accomplish or maintain an erection in the course of sexual efficiency. could be useful. Twenty-6 out of 35 men got a hundred and fifty to two hundred mg per day for 3 months. They knowledgeable significantly improved sexual function. This herb has long been shown to boost Electricity and decrease fatigue. A lot more scientific tests are needed to be aware of action and make sure safety. Then steep yourself in a very warm tub to loosen up your muscles plus your mind. In bed, rest your head with a lavender-loaded pillow—the fragrance induces sleepiness. (Reward: Cherries may also help prevent gout attacks.) This has prompted many people to explore ways to heal acne naturally at home. The web is crammed with suggestions, but do natural treatments basically function? Tea tree oil is yet another way to get rid of dandruff at home. Adhere to the Guidance provided under to treat dandruff at home effortlessly: Always request the advice of one's health practitioner or other capable wellbeing provider ahead of starting any new food plan or treatment method and with any inquiries you might have concerning a health care situation. When you've got or suspect that you've a health care problem, immediately contact your wellness treatment provider. Inexperienced tea has antimicrobial and antioxidant compounds which can help fight acne. To obtain its outcomes, utilize a cooled cup of inexperienced tea like a deal with clean or lay the bag about the impacted region. Figure out the 8 surefire techniques to get rid of acne when and for all. Chamomile can help lessen inflammation from acne. Inside of a blender or coffee grinder, Incorporate the contents of the chamomile tea bag with plenty of h2o to variety a paste, and use that to acne.

5 Easy Facts About natural treatments Described

Dehydroepiandrosterone (DHEA) is often a natural hormone produced by your adrenal glands. It may be converted to both equally estrogen and testosterone in the body. Scientists make the dietary dietary supplement from wild yam and soy. There are not any scientific studies Discovering the benefits of ingesting environmentally friendly tea With regards to acne, but applying it on to the skin has actually been proven to aid. Summary: Hormones that happen to be released through situations of strain could make acne even worse. Lessening anxiety may well support boost acne. Should you snore typically when on your back again, place a tennis ball in the shirt pocket Lower from an outdated T-shirt and sew it on the midback of your tight pajama top. Exfoliation is believed to enhance acne by getting rid of the pores and skin cells that clog up pores. It is also considered to help make acne treatments for that pores and skin more effective by permitting them to penetrate further, once the topmost layer of pores and skin is eradicated. You may as well obtain aloe gel from overall health-foods suppliers—just be sure it’s pure aloe, without any extra substances. Standard ED treatments include prescription medications, vacuum pumps, implants, and medical procedures, but a lot of Males like natural selections. Study has found that some natural alternatives can improve ED indications. Read on to learn about natural alternatives that have investigate to back them up. Orange peel is another dandruff treatment which can be experimented with at home. Read through the best way to use orange peel pack for dandruff elimination under: Swallow one to 2 teaspoons of sugar. The dry granules promote and reset the irritated nerve that is certainly creating the spasms in the diaphragm. Any coarse material, including salt, can work inside a pinch, but sugar tastes finest. (Discover 6 things your hiccups are trying to tell you.)  These so-termed probiotics contend with and swap the reeking microbes. (In addition they make you prettier—check it out!) The lemon-yogurt combo promptly neutralizes odor and lasts twelve to 24 several hours. The risks of acupuncture are very low if furnished by a certified acupuncturist. Acupuncture shows assure for managing ED, but a lot more reports are needed. Tea tree oil is An important oil which will have Rewards for pores and skin, hair and nails. Allow me to share fourteen realistic methods to use tea tree oil safely and… These with kidney problems really should consult with a overall health treatment practitioner right before using magnesium. (Here i will discuss three extra natural remedies on your headache.) This has prompted Many individuals to explore the best way to remedy acne naturally at home. The online market place is filled with ideas, but do natural treatments essentially operate?

home treatments Options

The gallbladder is tiny, but has the critical position of storing bile for the liver. A lot of cholesterol can result in gallstones, then loads of pain. Learn how home remedies can alleviate gallbladder agony. Coconut oil is often a style of fat which includes numerous health benefits. This post seems to be with the proof to determine irrespective of whether coconut oil can be very good on your… is the main-ever strategy that tackles the basis reason for pretty much each individual important ailment and well being condition. Get the copy currently!) appears to be most effective for people with high lipids inside their blood and metabolic syndrome. This herb is thought to own anti-inflammatory motion, improve lung functionality, and enhance blood flow in other diseases — all characteristics that may minimize ED. Mint may also help get rid of pore-clogging oil. To assist crystal clear acne right before it commences, mix two tablespoons of finely chopped clean mint with two tablespoons Each individual of plain yogurt and oatmeal (utilize a blender to pulverize the oatmeal to powder). Common ED treatments include prescription prescription drugs, vacuum pumps, implants, and surgery, but quite a few Males favor natural selections. Investigate has observed that some natural alternatives can boost ED indicators. Please read on to understand natural choices that have investigate to back again them up. Erectile dysfunction (ED) is usually referred to as impotence. It’s a problem through which a person can’t obtain or retain an erection throughout sexual performance. All these dandruff treatments could make the dandruff disappear, but aloe vera doubles as an itch-fighter. Quit oneself from scratching by massaging aloe vera into your scalp ahead of shampooing. To accomplish your registration be sure to enter the verification code you received with your mobile. Should you have not obtained the verification code, be sure to SMS REWARDME to 9223347100 Add boiling drinking water plus a teaspoon of natural and organic raw honey, an immunity booster that also coats distressing throat tissues. Breathe within the therapeutic vapor to open up sinuses, and sip a cupful two or 3 times day-to-day to combat the bug. (To create a standard sizzling toddy, incorporate a fifty percent shot of brandy.) Skip the shampoo and go correct to rinsing. Baking soda reduces overactive fungi that can cause dandruff. Your hair may well get dried out at the beginning, but after a couple of weeks your scalp will commence developing natural oils, leaving your hair softer and freed from flakes. Take a look at these other ingenious uses for baking soda. The enteric coating prevents capsules from opening within the belly and rising discomfort by leading to heartburn and indigestion. The peppermint releases and goes to operate lower while in the gastrointestinal tract, wherever gasoline-plagued folks need to have it most. (See what your gas is attempting to let you know.) It’s finest to established a particular time slot as part of your day to your physical exercise plan, so you don't skip it because of the justification which you don’t have ample time. Skip the dandruff shampoo and try these homemade dandruff treatments to banish These pesky white flakes.

natural cures Secrets

To cleanse skin, most Females desire the water strategy: Use warm drinking water to loosen Filth and clogged pores. Utilize a dime-sized bit of cleanser, then rinse with amazing or lukewarm water. The wellness great things about ginger root have been touted for hundreds of years, but now We have now scientific proof of its curative Homes. Several slices of Uncooked ginger root in boiling water might assist soothe a cough or sore throat. Honey has a number of antibacterial and antimicrobial Qualities. Consuming honey in tea with lemon can simplicity sore throat ache. Study implies that honey is a good cough suppressant, way too. Cigarette smoking will make your skin glimpse more mature and contributes to wrinkles. Smoking narrows the small blood vessels inside the outermost levels of skin, which decreases blood circulation and tends to make skin paler. This also depletes the skin of oxygen and nutrients that are important to skin wellness. “Make an at-home deal with mask using oatmeal,” implies Dr. Shah. “Oatmeal is usually a helpful natural ingredient as it functions as a humectant so it can help your skin retain moisture.” To whip one particular up Blend ½ cup hot water (not boiling) with 1/three cup oatmeal. Having said that, toners of these days are certainly not your mother's toners of a couple many years in the past. They're much much more gentle, full of antioxidants and skin brighteners and could make even the driest skin glimpse vibrant. Obtaining proper rest and peace can be crucial for fat loss. via steptoremedies.com is, not receiving ample high quality sleep has an effect on your starvation and fullness hormones, negatively variations the way in which One's body break down resources, and improvements how your genetics effect Your whole body mass index (BMI). Even though there isn't any substitute for your care provided by a fantastic medical professional, some very productive remedies can be acquired and not using a prescription. You'll be able to find out more about home remedies from this informative article. Aging is an unavoidable part of everyday living. So, here are some tips for all of the Adult males available who would like to glimpse a decade younger than their true age.  read more suggests Ladies exfoliate each day. "This when-a-week matter is nonsense. But, I believe It's important to know your skin. You'll want to never ever appear pink or irritated—you'll want to look far better after you scrub." If you'd like a cheerful skin, then cucumber is the answer. You could transform your complexion by applying a paste of cucumber mixed with raw milk. It can just take quarter-hour for cucumber juice to seep into your skin then wash off with refreshing water. It also can help in soothing and softening your skin. Water is essential to balanced residing. Learn the home remedies that can hold you from getting to be dehydrated. You’ve been performing it for ages, but do you truly know how frequently you must clean your hair? The answer may possibly shock you.

For many years, experts weren't sure if donning a mask was efficient at blocking the distribute of viruses. Nonetheless, new research advise they…

How Much You Need To Expect You'll Pay For A Good beauty tips

garlic ingested to perhaps lessen cholesterol and blood pressure, address fungal bacterial infections and colds "CAM", this means "complementary and choice medicine", will not be also investigated as typical medicine, which undergoes rigorous study ahead of release to the public.[203] Funding for research can be sparse which makes it tough to do additional study for efficiency of CAM.[204] Most funding for CAM is funded by governing administration companies. Because of its several names the sphere has been criticized for intense rebranding of What exactly are effectively the identical methods.[sixteen] Issues with definition[edit] These ten home remedies for sleeplessness can help you get back on target with a great night's snooze. See the best way to rest better Using these home remedies. Getting more mature isn't exciting, specially when the symptoms of perimenopause or menopause hit. You could potentially test these powerful menopause natural remedies, but amongst the best natural remedies is workout. It’s vital that the exercise routine regime has a mixture of cardio and bodyweight schooling. dong quai for women and ginseng for guys and ladies, ingested to boost standard well being and stamina – On this software, they're referred to as tonics. Other tonics contain eleuthero and rhodiola. Bond. “I suggest influenced folks rub a bit of papaya fruit around the white patches. Enable it dry and afterwards apply yet again. See the juice penetrates the skin. As well as this, drink papaya juice each day. Papaya will help in reviving the melanin cells. Continue using this procedure and you may understand noticeable consequences.” As you’re acquiring correct care, you can look at productive home remedies for gout suffering. Attempt adding cherries to the food plan—refreshing, frozen, or dried. They help reduce inflammation and gout flare-ups simply because they consist of anthocyanin. Seek to eat fifteen to twenty cherries daily. Your not long ago seen things and featured tips › See or edit your searching record If it is discovered to become reasonably Secure and productive, It will probably be recognized. But assertions, speculation, and testimonies don't substitute for evidence. Alternative remedies should be subjected to scientific screening no less arduous than that necessary for typical treatment options.[3] In India, Ayurvedic medication has very advanced formulation with 30 or maybe more components, such as a sizable amount of elements which have gone through "alchemical processing", decided on to balance dosha.[seventy eight] Wouldn't it be terrific to possess a Stay-in doctor/therapist/coach to are likely to your every day aches and pains? ( Some herbs, for instance cannabis and coca, are outright banned in most nations around the world although coca is authorized in a lot of the South American international locations where by it is actually grown. The Cannabis plant is employed being an herbal medicine, and therefore is lawful in a few areas of the planet. any option cancer remedy is bogus by definition. There will never be an alternative most cancers cure. Why? Because if anything seemed midway promising, then mainstream oncology would scrutinize it, and when there is everything to it, it will turn into mainstream Pretty much quickly and very quickly.

About home remedies

Mullein’s soothing properties may well aid heal bronchial respiratory bacterial infections. The leaves are commonly added to cough formulation. The home remedies that We've got collected aren't risky substitute therapies practiced versus your medical professional's objections. Alternatively they are Risk-free, functional steps you can utilize to assist treat more than one hundred common health conditions. See our list of remedies, A-Z. Due to its several names the field has been criticized for extreme rebranding of Exactly what are essentially exactly the same procedures: the moment one particular title is declared synonymous with quackery, a new identify is picked.[sixteen] Common drugs[edit] Try out some respiration exercise routines. This can pressure your brain to deal with the exercising and will assist you to fail to remember whatsoever it's which is stressing you out. A lot of people have looked to St. John's wort being an herbal option to prescription medicines for anxiety and melancholy. St. John's Wort: Herbal Remedies will show you if this herb has what it's going to take To ease melancholy. Mint or pudina is a common function in Indian drinks and dishes for the duration of summers. The cooling properties of the brilliant environmentally friendly leaves are incredibly famous. Mint leaves also are added to ... If you have oily skin, your skin demands further awareness over the winter time. Winter season creams are large in oils and you cannot steer clear of them. Here are several ways to control oily skin in winters. Although all of our herbal remedies can have magnificent final results, some herbs look to get far more attention than Other individuals. Underneath are links to many of the preferred herbs in health and fitness-food items suppliers and supermarkets: Generally speaking Guidelines for Methodologies on Exploration and Analysis of Standard Drugs, published in 2000 by the whole world Wellbeing Firm (WHO), complementary and substitute medication ended up outlined as a broad list of health care tactics that are not Component of that place's personal tradition and they are not built-in into your dominant overall health care technique.[12][thirteen] But don't be afraid to also use an acne products if you want it. Occasionally the acne would not disappear wholly by 'natural' signifies it doesn't matter what you need to do, particularly if you happen to be younger, considering that your hormones can just be also out of stability at that age. Then, according to the Guild “the herbalist, with all your involvement, ought to establish an integrated herbal program that addresses your particular overall health demands and problems.” genuine acupuncture treatment options have been no simpler than sham acupuncture remedies. There was, nevertheless, proof that equally true acupuncture and sham acupuncture had been simpler than no treatment, Which acupuncture generally is a useful health supplement to other varieties of standard therapy for very low back ache.[156] They quoted one of those experts, Steven Salzberg, a genome researcher and computational biologist with the University of Maryland, as stating "Certainly one of our fears is the fact NIH is funding pseudoscience." They noted that the vast majority of reports ended up determined by essential misunderstandings of physiology and ailment, and experienced revealed little or no result.[155] This info is only for informational needs. It's not Meant to Deliver Health care Information. Neither the Editors of Consumer Guideline (R), Publications Worldwide, Ltd., the creator nor publisher take duty for just about any possible outcomes from any treatment, method, workout, dietary modification, motion or application of medication which ends up from looking at or adhering to the information contained During this data. The publication of the information and facts isn't going to constitute the apply of drugs, and this information and facts won't change the advice within your medical doctor or other well being care supplier. Ahead of enterprise any system of treatment method, the reader will have to search for the advice in their medical professional or other health and fitness care provider.

Facts About skin care Revealed

Wintertime time is synonymous to your season of dryness. The lack of humidity and the imbalance in temperature - chilly outside and warm indoors - make our hair dry, frizzy and unmanageable. Peel masks are usually gel-like in regularity, and comprise acids or exfoliating agents that can help exfoliate the skin, together with other ingredients to hydrate, discourage wrinkles, or address uneven skin tone. Blend the combination with milk product and utilize it on the facial area. Depart the paste to dry for just one hour and rinse it using basic drinking water.  It lifts away the dry skin, giving a fresh new lively glimpse to the skin. Cosmetics can be also explained through the Bodily composition of your product or service. Cosmetics is usually liquid or cream emulsions; powders, the two pressed and loose; dispersions; and anhydrous creams or sticks. Beneath the EU cosmetic regulation, makers, retailers, and importers of cosmetics in Europe might be specified as "Liable Man or woman".[seventy four] This new standing indicates which the responsible particular person has the legal legal responsibility making sure that the cosmetics and types they manufacture or offer adjust to The existing beauty restrictions and norms. Healthline and our companions may receive a portion of revenues should you come up with a buy employing a connection earlier mentioned. [20] Making use of the appropriate brush to use a specific merchandise lets the product to Mix into the skin smoothly and evenly. You can definitely let the wand fly so it lengthens without creating a large number—the mascara will just hit the card! Your lashes will go from barely-there to complete and thick in seconds."—Jeannine Morris, Beauty Sweet Place Long several hours at perform, then searching and having issues arranged for the festive period might be tiring. I'd suggest you make this fantastic eye wash which is able to make you are feeling refreshed right away. Choose iced spring drinking water in a bowl and incorporate some drops of rose drinking water, two-3 drops of honey and immerse just one eye into it. Looking for improved fairness and pigmentation control? Desire to brighten your skin and fade the marks on it? The array of facial kits and skin care sets on Amazon India allows you to refresh and rejuvenate your complexion from your comfort and ease of the home. All you might want to do is pick the best package for your preferences. From each day cleansing solutions to kits that hydrate and sooth your skin, you can find facial kits for all skin sorts. Look through from the well known facial kits from brand names like VLCC, Shahnaz Husain, Lotus Herbals and even more to locate a skin care Remedy for your needs. Flaunt Attractive Skin, Pick out Home Facial Kits On the web Swallow 1 to 2 teaspoons of sugar. The dry granules encourage and reset the irritated nerve which is producing the spasms of the diaphragm. Any coarse material, for example salt, can perform inside of a pinch, but sugar preferences best. (Uncover six items your hiccups try to show you.)  Contouring is built to give form to a region of your experience. The goal is to improve the natural shading about the experience to give the illusion of a more defined facial framework which may be altered to preference. Brighter skin coloured make-up merchandise are used to 'spotlight' locations which can be planned to draw notice to or to become caught in the light, Whilst darker shades are employed to create a shadow. Tea's tannins eliminate germs and close the pores within your toes, keeping feet dry lengthier; bacteria have a tendency to prosper in moist environments. You will see results in a few days to weekly. One particular caution: Do the soak only Whenever your ft are freed from cuts. Dead skin cells can steal the glow from the skin. Standard exfoliation is very important to eliminate dead skin cells. Know a variety of strategies to take away useless skin cells.

healthy habbits - An Overview

"For The perfect lunch, a quarter from the plate could be taken up by lean protein, A different quarter could well be crammed with very low-GI or wholegrain carbs, and also the remaining fifty percent would be crammed with salad or veggies."

For yummy recipe strategies, may possibly we recommend signing up for the BuzzFeed Food stuff publication? Here's fifteen stuff you may discover if you are doing. Genetic pre-disposition may possibly result in harmful outcomes, but healthy dwelling could avert adverse conditions like alopecia. Taking care within your hair is as important as almost every other part of the body. As you often go over other body parts your hair are subjected to a lot of air pollution, Dust and substances. Currently, we're summing up each one of these hair procedure ideas and providing you with twenty methods for healthy hair. Healthy Routine #four: Raise Non-Physical exercise Actual physical Activity Your each day exercise session is very important. But for those who go to the gymnasium for one hour and commit the remainder of the working day sitting inside of a chair or laying within the sofa, you happen to be possibly undertaking extra damage than fantastic if you workout. A lot of people who struggle with their overall health or excess weight say they've tried each and every diet program or foodstuff system beneath the Solar, without any very long-term good results. Make your own personal sauces rather then applying bottled or sachet versions - as an example, using fresh new tomatoes as your foundation coupled with herbs and spices. twelve. Check out to lift your coronary heart rate for your sustained period of time every day. Tap to Engage in GIF Tap to Enjoy GIF Take a look at the ends of your respective hair. For those who detect a strand of hair that splits into two or even more areas or is weakened at the tip, you probably have split ends. The only real way to remove them will be to trim your hair prior to it splits all the more. Thanks! Yes No Not Useful seventeen Practical eighty five If you prefer wrapping a towel close to your hair to dry, check out a considerable microfiber towel rather. Test A different reply... And the more antibiotics you take, the more you operate the potential risk of building up a resistance into the antibiotics, which means they will be a lot less effective down the line if you could truly will need them. Midback-level – hair that is at regarding the very same stage because the widest Section of one's ribcage and upper body area Very first we slip in compact methods, like after we're operating at the rear of one particular early morning and haven't got time to Prepare dinner egg whites so we gobble a handful of doughnuts in the vehicle. Or our child has a school party so we can't fit in our evening jog. Or we have to deliver function house so we don't have time to halt with the health and fitness center. Will not brush or contact your hair roughly even though it truly is damp, and you'll want to use plenty of conditioner. A number of people realize that retaining their hair inside a braid also will help retain it from finding breaking. Use conditioner that matches your hair variety, length, and procedure problems. A good rule of thumb is usually to issue every time you shampoo your hair, although really processed or dyed hair possibly requirements a little bit more enjoy than natural hair.

5 Easy Facts About hair care Described

Some scientists think that laughter really may be the top medication, mainly because it can assist you sense improved and minimize tension. To start with we slip in modest ways, like once we're running behind a person morning and do not have time and energy to cook egg whites so we gobble two or three doughnuts in the car. Or our kid has a faculty celebration so we will not fit in our night jog. Or we must provide function residence so we don't have time to stop for the fitness center. You've got to have the ability to self-mirror to discover In case you have any repetitive behaviors which you do without having a rational drive.​ Try out to break the habit by sitting down down for the kitchen area or dining desk for the duration of every single meal. For even better success, go to the table when you're ingesting, together with if you're snacking. This is a quite simple technique, pour some almond oil in a bowl and warmth it for 40 seconds. Then evenly distribute on the hair. Leave it for half-hour and afterwards rinse Typically with shampoo and conditioner applying cold water./ https://www.facebook.com/steptoremedies/ Coloured or dealt with hair probably desires a shampoo which is fortified with extracts or amino acids, due to the fact treating your hair is basically harming it. Applying this artificial manner of drying procedure is likely to make your hair extra brittle and dry. Should you have no time and energy to let your hair air dry, then use blow-dryer sparingly and you should definitely make use of a heat environment instead of a scorching setting./p You are going to find out how to develop a overall body that's lean, powerful and flexible. If you don't belong to the gymnasium or require aid discovering exercising classes, think about using a fun and straightforward on the internet exercise session to find the exercise you would like. And inside of a working day or two at most that comprehensive program begins to feel oppressive. Sticking with every single improve starts to feel extremely hard. "Packaged foods are typically larger in Excess fat, salt and sugar than foods cooked from scratch, when missing nutrients and fibre," she claims. . So we determine the one way to be successful will be to adopt a complicated, comprehensive application of diet plan and work out that requires sizeable modifications. Do not waste your time and effort adopting the most recent fashionable diet plan or the current Physical fitness trend. No matter how amazing the program, go all in so you're incredibly unlikely to persist with it. Remember to touch upon your preferred healthy practices within the reviews down below. Also share any extra healthy practices you really feel are crucial to healthy residing in the remarks down below. It really is much too easy to try to eat takeaway if there is very little while in the fridge or place with each other a thing naughty when It truly is stuffed with unhealthy foods.

healthy diet - An Overview

The essential system of fat loss is to produce a calorie deficit in the human body by eating much less energy having a well balanced diet chart. A minimum of 1200-1800 calorie is the basic necessity of your body and decreasing calorie ingestion down below that could sign the brain to slow down metabolism and the body will get started conserving fat and extract Strength from muscles alternatively. For those who’re even now tempted, why not make your own personal, that way you understand precisely what’s likely into them. Savoury muffins are more healthy – try out our sweet potato and cheddar muffins. Prepare ahead It can be incredibly very easy to inadvertently eat in excess of you need and also to undervalue portions. Find out how. Iodine deficiency during pregnancy leads to even now births, abortions and cretinism hence use iodized salt within your foods. Seen fats are those who are divided from their pure sources which include ghee/butter from milk, cooking oils from oil bearing seeds and nuts. It is not difficult to watch their consumption. Retail store new fruits and vegetables like strawberries, lettuce, herbs, and mushrooms inside a clear fridge in a temperature of 40° File or under. Use oral rehydration Alternative (ORS) in conjunction with zinc pill to prevent and Command dehydration during diarrhea episodes. Even though Liquor in moderation has coronary heart Rewards, greater intakes can lead to a wide range of health problems. Even average ingesting impairs your capability to generate and may boost the possibility of specified cancers. Lots of people, such as pregnant Gals and individuals who have certain professional medical circumstances, must stay away from alcohol entirely. Proteins are essential for increasing muscle mass mass, and the ideal lower saturated Fats normal resources of protein are egg whites and low-Fats dairy. Along with the handful of of us who do do well to lose some fat by surviving a restrictive diet, will never have any clue on how to keep up it so that they don’t return to their preceding size. Keep the salt ingestion to less than 5 grams every day as it can help to stop hypertension, and cuts down the risk of heart disease. Prefer iodized salt. Food stuff additives The prolonged-phrase consequences of consuming a combination of various additives in our food stuff are currently not known... Meals for toddlers - tucker talk recommendations In advance of 6 months, breastmilk or formulation is the only real meals and drink that the infant needs... Feeding on a diversified, very well-well balanced diet indicates having a range of foods from each of your five foods groups everyday, while in the proposed amounts.

[hannahindie]

Breathe - Part 2

Pairing: Dean x Reader Series Warnings: Fatal illness, character death, blood, canon violence, language, eventual smut, kidnapping. Word Count: 2,083 Square Filled: Fatal Illness Summary: A year earlier, the reader finds out exactly what’s going on and has to make a difficult decision. That decision affects her present day life with Sam and Dean, and she has to decide what to do; keep herself at arm’s length, or let Dean in. A/N: This is the second part of my SPN Angst Bingo Card, hosted by @spnangstbingo. It will be seven parts, and the schedule has already been posted. It will post twice a week (Monday and Friday) until it wraps up. **Disclaimer for this particular chapter: I don’t know much about cancer. My life has been affected by it way too often, but the information I wrote here I got from the Mayo clinic website. I may be taking some liberty with it, simply because I don’t have super in depth experience. I apologize ahead of time if it isn’t 100% accurate.

It was beta’d by the ever fantastic and my writing soulmate @trexrambling: “This ending was damn straight perfection, Han.”

My beautiful twinny, @pinknerdpanda: “I need MORE!”

And my dear, sweet angel baby @masksandtruths: “ Damn it, you are breaking my heart....again.”

Thanks to all three for helping a girl out so that her words make sense. I owe a lot to all of you.

As always, tags are at the bottom. If you’d like to be added, please let me know.

One Year Earlier…

Growing up, I watched my parents hunt. Their parents were hunters, and their parents’ parents were hunters...it is just what my family does. Well, what it did. I don’t have a large family, and hunting doesn’t really promote a flourishing family tree.

I saw my parents die. I watched the larger than life werewolf tear them apart, I heard my father scream for me and watched as he threw his gun as close to me as he could get it before its yellowed teeth clamped down on his throat. I stared at my hands as they grabbed the gun, as if they belonged to another person while they wrapped around the cool metal and pearl handle and squeezed the trigger. I remember being carried from the woods and placed in the backseat of a stranger’s car, the fear that had wrapped around my heart turning into a numbness that lingered for years after the fact.

So the feeling that is coursing through me now in this too sterile room, the rubbing alcohol burning my nostrils, is familiar. It’s familiar and terrifying and I’m not sure what I’m more afraid of; the fear itself, or the numbness that I know is coming.

“You have what is called small cell lung cancer, or SCLC.” She pulls an x-ray from a manila envelope and places it on the display. I don’t know much about human anatomy, but I’m pretty sure my chest shouldn’t look like it does. “As you can see, you have a pretty significant tumor in your right lung, and it has grown into the space between your lungs and your heart. If you look here-” she points to two darker areas- “there are separate parts to the tumor, in two different lobes.”

I know she’s speaking English, and that so far she’s keeping it pretty simple, but I can’t help but look at her like she just babbled at me in Ancient Greek. “So...what...what does that mean?”

She turns off the light to the display and pulls a stool over next to me, “It means that, out of the four stages that you can possibly have, yours is a IIIB. Each stage has different features that qualify it...right now, yours meets all three features. It has also spread to the lymph nodes near the carina, which is where your windpipe splits into the left and right bronchi and in the space between your lungs.”

This sounds bad, and of course it’s bad, it’s lung cancer, but I’m only thirty. How does this happen? I take a shaky breath in an attempt to steady my voice, “Is there any good news at all? Because right now it feels like you basically just handed me my death certificate.”

“Honestly, I don’t have much, and I’m sorry. The good part of all of this is that it’s in the limited stage, which means it’s only in the one lung and the lymph nodes affected are on the same side. It also hasn’t spread to any other organs. That is incredibly lucky, because only about one out of three people catch it this early.” Her small smile falters, and I brace myself for the other side of this shit sandwich. “However, the five year survival rate of small cell lung cancer compared to non-small cell...it’s drastically lower.”

“How much lower?”

“Ms. Y/LN, I need you to keep in mind that these survival rates are only an estimate, they can’t predict what will happen to any individual person-”

“How much lower?”

“The five year relative survival rate for stage III SCLC is about eight percent. But we can treat it, we have options. They are limited, but they are options, and there has been some success.”

The rest of the conversation is a blur. She hands me pamphlets and offers me a glass of water, displaying a kindness I'm sure she's gotten down to a science in this line of work. I know what she’s saying is important, she’s listing medicines and writing scripts and explaining that we can get chemotherapy started right away, but I don’t hear it. There is talk of procedures that will make it easier to breathe, but right now it’s taking everything I have to force myself to keep going, to focus on the air coming in and going out. Her words are fading into the background as the same thought keeps screaming, drowning out everything else.

I am dying.

Now…

Every so often, Dean’s eyes flick up to the rearview mirror. They don’t linger; it’s almost as if he’s checking to make sure I’m still in the back of the car. He hasn’t mentioned what happened back at the hotel, and I’m hoping he forgets about it. However, as I watch his eyes flick up to the mirror again, I know he won’t.

I scoot up and lean on the back of the seat, “So, uh, Sam, what’s up with this ghost, anyway?”

I see Sam’s massive shoulders shift slightly as he shrugs, “It’s pretty straight forward. The hotel actually used to be a mansion owned by a doctor, who was married with eight children. The doctor was well known and seemed to be liked by everyone in town, and honestly his life was pretty normal until his children started dying suddenly. Like clockwork, the children became horribly sick, in order from youngest to oldest, and within three weeks all eight of them had died. Rumor was that the wife had something to do with it, but at the time there was no way to prove it. Shortly after the last funeral, the doctor didn’t show up to open his practice, which was very unusual. His nurse called the police, and when they arrived, the front door was open. The doctor had been killed, and his wife was nowhere to be found. To this day, no one knows what prompted the deaths of the children, or why the doctor was killed. No one ever found her.”

I settle back into the seat and look out the window at the scenery passing in a blur, “That’s uplifting.”

“Well, you asked.”

I don't answer, and the car falls silent aside from the rock music playing softly in the background. I quietly flip my bag open and shuffle through the books and papers, searching for the little box that so far has given me life. My fingertips rest on the Altoid can and I flip it open, grabbing a pill and a mint at the same time. Can't be too careful when it comes to covering up my lies.

“Hey, can I get one of those mints?” Dean's hand pops over the back of the seat and I lock eyes with him in the mirror. He's testing me; like Sam, he's catching on.

“Sure.” I drop one in his hand, popping the actual pill into my mouth as I smile and snap the tin closed. His eyes narrow for just a second, then his gaze drops back to the road.

I'm tired. My head drops back onto the cool leather seat and I let my eyes slip shut. My chest hurts, and it feels like someone is sitting on my sternum. I concentrate on breathing, careful to make it sound normal, like I'm not struggling to get enough air. I wonder how long this is going to drag on, how much more time I have.

The car begins to slow and I open my eyes as we pull into a gas station. Dean immediately goes for the gas pump so, before he has a chance to settle his sights back on me, I walk quickly into the convenience store.

“What's going on?” I jump and nearly drop the bag of Combos I am contemplating, then glare at the guilty party.

“Jesus, Sam! Can you not? And what do you mean, ‘What’s going on’?”

He crosses his arms and tilts his head, “You and Dean have been weird. What happened before we left the motel?”

I roll my eyes as I make my way towards the drinks, “Nothing happened. And could you define weird? Because the only interaction we've had since we left the hotel was him asking me for a mint.”

“Exactly!” Sam gestures wildly, his voice still loud even though I can tell he's trying to whisper. “You guys talk all the time. Music, movies, food. You're like the female version of Dean. You guys haven't spoken the entire time. It's weird.”

I grab a Coke, then turn to face Sam. He's looking at me expectantly, and I sigh, “Nothing happened. I'm just tired, and I'm sure he's tired, and that's it. We left the room like ten seconds after you, there wasn't time for anything to happen. Cool your jets, would you? It's fine.” I walk towards the counter, “They've got some organic snacks over by the chips, make sure you get some so you aren't cranky later.”

I grab a couple other snacks as I make my way to the counter, pay, then walk outside and toss Dean one of my last-second purchases.

“Oooo, teriyaki lime jerky. Someone knows the way to my heart.” He pulls the nozzle from the tank and it clunks into place on the pump. “What did I do to deserve you?”

I shrug and lean against the car, “I am truly a gift. You should probably appreciate me more.”

Suddenly, he's directly in front of me, his moss green eyes burning into mine, and then his hand is on my waist. He's close, so close I can smell the shampoo he used this morning and the faint mix of toothpaste and the motel coffee he called breakfast. “I would like very much to show that appreciation.” He smiles, and for a second I am tempted. Oh, am I tempted.

“Dean, we’ve talked about this-”

He tilts his head, and his eyes do that squinty thing he does when he’s thinking about what to say. What I want to do is reach up and smooth the worry wrinkle between his brows, trace the little crinkles at the corners of his eyes, but instead I hold my ground. Barely, but it’s held.

“No, you talked about this...and I let it go, because I mean...you’re right. Our lives,” he scoffs, “our lives are fucked up. People like us die young and we die bloody. And if we are lucky enough to live to the ripe old age of sixty, we also live long enough to see everyone we love killed. And it sucks, God, it sucks, but it is what it is. But I’m tired of that, alright? This-” he gestures between us- “this is worth it. You can’t tell me you don’t feel it. You can’t tell me that you haven’t felt it since Omaha.”

Omaha. Low blow, Winchester.

“Is this really the time to discuss this? As lovely as this gas pump is, this isn’t exactly a romantic way to bring it up.” He is still staring at me, his mouth set in a determined line, and for a moment I want to tell him to quit making that face, that his lips look better when he smiles because they’re full and pink and beautiful, but that would not help this situation. Instead, I sigh, “Omaha was a mistake, Dean. It was fun, but...it was a mistake.” His hand drops from my waist and I would take all the cancer in the world if it meant I never had to see that look on his face again. If I thought my chest hurt before, it is nothing compared to what it feels like now.

His tongue darts out and wets his lips, the bottom one catching between his teeth as he stares at me. It looks like he’s going to argue with me, and there’s a little part of me that is begging him to fight for it, for us, to convince me that my plan is garbage, but instead he walks away. He’s opening the driver’s side door by the time Sam gets to the car and looks at me quizzically.

“You okay?”

I clear my throat, “Oh, yea, I’m fine.” I climb into the backseat and settle in against the door. The car starts with an echoing roar, and he accelerates out of the lot faster than is necessary.

For the rest of the drive, his eyes never look up into the rearview mirror.

Read part 3 HERE.

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#spn angst bingo #breathe part 2 #dean winchester #dean x reader #angst #so much angst

[lady-divine-writes]

Klaine one-shot - “A Highland Groom” (Rated PG13)

Kurt, the son of the Highland Chief of the Clan MacKenzie, is traded to a Lowland Baron to secure peace between the clans. Kurt, with his father ill and his freedom stolen, is less than thrilled with this arrangement, especially when he sees his new husband for the first time. (3808 words)

Notes: This is a re-write. This is kind of Harlequin style - emphasis on the drama and less on historical accuracy, though I did consult clan maps, clan websites, historical map sites, and dialect guides in an attempt to be as close as possible. Also, I wrote the dialogue to give readers a taste of the accent without tripping over it. I hope it works :)

Read on AO3.

Kurt steers his midnight Friesian, Elliott, up and over the crest of the final knoll, following his course at a slow walk, not eager to arrive at his destination. He knows not how a man, about to become a groom, should feel as he journeys to the home of his would-be husband, but Kurt, dressed in his ceremonial tartan and sash, perched in a new leather saddle (apparently a wedding gift from his betrothed), fears he may be sick. This illness began as a twinge in his stomach as he traveled farther and farther from his father’s castle - as he watched it become a spot in the distance, watched it disappear behind the green Highland hills - only to develop into a vile nausea, making him unable to sleep comfortably at night, causing him to eat very little, and filling his mouth with the tang of constant acid that rose up his throat and burned away at his tongue. After that, eating became but a chore, as he hadn’t a taste for anything.

The air feels cooler on this part of the continent than in the land he called home. It hangs heavy with the icy water that kisses the shore not a day’s ride from this overlook. The grass laid out beneath his horse’s hooves is remarkably green here – dense and luxurious, like a fine plush blanket he could sink into. Not like the short, lime green grass from where he comes.

Not like in the Highlands.

The loch further on feeds the flora here. The trees grow taller; the heather thicker, beholding a startling violet coloration to their petals; the soil richer, more fertile, bursting to give life to seed and animal alike. It is not in the nature of water to travel to high ground, so perhaps the Lowland barbarians have this felicity in their corner, but Kurt’s father always said that living in the Highlands put them closer to God.

And even though Kurt may not necessarily believe in the man, he needs God to watch over him now, more than ever.

The thought of Kurt’s father brings a grim set to his face and tears to his eyes, tears he would show no one, but as he travels alone, he allows a scarce few to fall.

Kurt didn’t want to leave his Da with no one to care for him – no wife to tend to him, no other children to bring him comfort. Being advanced in years and with his heart paining him, Kurt fears that his Da has naught but one or two winters left. It seems asinine that at this tenuous time in his sire’s life, Kurt is being sent away. This union wasn’t by any choice of Kurt’s. The whole matter had been decided before Kurt even heard rumor of it, in secret conferences held behind closed doors. But when the day came to depart, Kurt showed his sire no frown nor worry. He put on a strong face, stood straight and tall, and mounted his stallion with pride, taking off for the Lowlands with all the bearing he could muster.

The bearing befitting a lord.

But days later, here he sits atop his horse, a shiver of fright taking over where the chill of the cold left off. The animal beneath him treads without command, over land where many of Kurt’s kin fought and died during dark times, during the war between the clans - their precious blood spilt, heads lobbed off and skewered on spikes, lined up along this very ridge as a warning to those who would follow.

Too much blood has fed this grass. It is time for this feud to be done before another terrible battle starts, for day after day, raid after raid, there seems to be one looming just beyond the horizon.

In theory, this wedding between him and … God above! Kurt doesn’t even know the man’s name! … should end the conflict, seal the bond between the clans, wash away the blood, and make these lands safe again for his people. But they aren’t safe for the moment, and regardless of Kurt’s upcoming nuptials, much of the Lowlands is considered forbidden, which is why Kurt’s escort - two armed men of his father’s choosing - made the journey with him as far as the border, and from there Kurt was left to ride the remainder alone.

Tis considered an act of good faith for Kurt to continue his journey unescorted and unarmed.

Kurt sees it as foolish, but, yet again, he had no say, and now that he is on his own, entering the tree line of an unknown and savage country, Kurt feels uneasy, on edge, picturing assassins behind every trunk, poised in the branches, ready to take his life - either out of revenge or for a purse of gold, it matters not.

Kurt wraps the leather reins around his hands to keep him steady, but it helps for little when he trembles down to his bones.

Kurt stays on the alert, but his mind wanders a trifle, for he cannot help wondering what manner of beast his father has shackled him to – some scoundrel, a preening wretch who will rank Kurt twelfth after his band of ready whores. Or maybe a toothless, decrepit old man, twisted and infirm, wanting to get a swain for his bed before he hurries off to meet his maker.

His father knows and chose not to tell, which imbues Kurt with not an inch of confidence.

But his father loves him. He would not pick unwisely for him … unless he had no choice.

Maybe the matter lay less in his father’s hands than Kurt realizes.

Though his new husband may turn out to be unfavorable, Kurt has to admit the land out here is splendid. The more of it he sees, the more that he thanks the angels who guard him that he will have this to escape to, these gorgeous rolling hills and acres of blessed beauty to ride his horse over from sun up to sun down, as he expects to entertain his new lord little if he has any say in the matter.

His body may be traded for peace, but not his heart. That belongs to him and him alone.

Past midday, the trees ahead of him part, and there it stands – the castle of the Baron Colquhoun.

Kurt’s horse comes to an unbidden halt as his master’s legs tighten around him. Kurt can hardly breathe in its presence, and at once, he wants to turn his stallion around and ride full speed for home.

This vision his eyes hold is not of a castle. It is a ruin – a haphazard heap of rock and stone piled one on top the other, creating a mass that rises high and tilts in such a treacherous way that Kurt fears for the lives of those within. It seems fit overall more for livestock than it does for a chief and his clan, but even then only by a fraction, and only in a case of dire need. This ancient stronghold might actually be held upright by wishes and prayers instead of by any competent mortar, which Kurt finds commendable since he has not faith enough in anything to keep such a structure erect. Kurt’s shock at this monstrosity is overwhelmed only by his confusion. Surely his father didn’t mean for Kurt to live here. He would not stand for his son and heir being forced to make due with such detestable accommodations, not at any price. This must be some trick, a test of Kurt’s loyalty, to see if he will go through with the marriage. And when he has made good on his promise, his new lord and husband will spirit him away to their true home for having proven himself a worthy spouse.

Or, Kurt’s life could be over, this rundown shambles his prison until the day he dies and rots within its crumbling walls, which may be sooner than he expected. Then they shall entomb him here, simply wait until the place collapses with his cadaver inside, swallowing him whole.

Kurt’s body becomes leaden, immovable as iron as he stares upon his new home, the want to cry, to curse, to scream suddenly an abundant need, but he dare not. He will do nothing to disgrace his sire or his people by behaving like a brat – unmannered and spoilt. He will ride down to the gates of his appointed hell with his head held high, march through to the hall, and confront the man who would so shamefully pass himself off as a noble and provide this for his husband as insult.

Kurt fixes a stern expression to his face and keeps a weather-eye cast ahead, past the castle, out toward the horizon. He occupies his mind as he approaches, doing everything in his power not to stare at the stark grey towers marring the soothing periwinkle blue of the sky above with their jagged turrets, unkept and broken, a disgrace to the Colquhoun name, not to mention his own.

Ah, but the Colquhoun name will soon be his own, and he refuses to see it dishonored. He will find this Baron Colquhoun and make his intentions known. This folly ends tonight – Kurt will see to it. He will demand it done, have this place returned to its former glory – if ever there was any to begin with - or else he cannot rightly call himself his father’s son.

As Kurt rides nearer the seemingly abandoned wreck of a castle, he can see it is in a greater state of decay than he perceived from afar, the entirety of the fortress slowly being engulfed by the land it stands upon. The stones at the base show cracks that Kurt suspects run straight through to the foundation. He grimaces. The cellars must leak unendingly, and flood during the rainy season, the walls crawling with poisonous black mold from floor to ceiling. He finds evidence to that in the moat, which has barely a drop of water in it, filled to the brim with dark, stagnant mud.

It’s an effective deterrent in Kurt’s case. It would be enough to keep him away.

“Oh, Elliott,” Kurt says into the neck of his beloved horse. “Why have I been doomed to live in this forsaken place? What tis it I’ve done to anger the universe so?”

Kurt searches for a sentry on the wall to announce his arrival, or for any lookout on the watch tower who will at least command the drawbridge be lowered, but there is none – not a single human being on the grounds without or within. He leads Elliott around the outskirts of the outer wall, in search of a way inside. There seems to be none – no way across the moat, no niche for him to enter should he make it there, and not a person anywhere to send up a call. He discovers on his second pass, as he comes back around, a narrow plank, brown as the mud beneath it, with width enough for a single man to make a way across if they turn their body sideways and slide foot after foot. Kurt looks down at his bright white shirt and immaculate tartan, and sighs. He dismounts his horse.

He sees no way that he won’t end up in the moat, as good as his luck’s been lately.

Kurt walks up to the plank hovering a mere inch above the foul bog. The end has been rammed into the earth of this bank and looks secure, though he cannot see the end on the opposite bank. He puts a cautious foot to the wood. The plank waggles to and fro till Kurt steadies it. He slides a bit forward, then adds a second foot behind, listing like a boat during a storm, eyes wide and fearful till his stomach cramps with his efforts to make it stop. He takes in a deep breath of relief as he finds his balance, reluctant to move from the position he had struggled so hard for. But he knows he must.

Go back or go forward, and he knows he cannot go back.

“I am Kurt MacKenzie of the Clan MacKenzie, Highland born son of the Chief, and I will conquer this crossing …” He forces his left foot forward, sliding it across the board. “I will conquer this castle …” He brings his right foot to follow. “I will conquer this baron and take my place by his side …” Kurt grunts as he slides further. There is no bright sun at this hour of day to burn Kurt’s fair skin, yet he sweats beneath his shirt, starting at the shoulder that bears the weight of his tartan sash, perspiration running down his back and gathering at his hips. The plank gives an abrupt lurch and Kurt heaves forward, knees knocking together as he goes rigid, becoming one with the wood to keep from losing his footing. He repeats his mantra over again, hoping that the words give him the strength to make it across.

“I am Kurt MacKenzie … of the Clan MacKenzie … Highland born son of the Chief … and I will conquer this crossing … I will conquer this castle … I will conquer this baron and take my place by his side …”

Kurt sees the bank within reach of his leg - just another step and he should be able to make it with only his leather shoes sacrificed to the effort.

“That’s … ugh … the first reparation … oompf! … this baron will need … umf … to make,” Kurt mutters, “for not … having the common decency … to-aaaaaaah!”

An eardrum-splitting squeal rends the air as behind Kurt something like the form of a large, grime-soaked pig bounds from the moat and up onto the plank, bowing it in the center, dragging it below the level of the mud. Kurt feels his foot dip under and he scrambles for the bank, barely making it before the animal dives back into the moat and paddles for shore. The plank snaps back with a resounding dull twang, vibrations sending droplets of muck jettisoning Kurt’s way. When the disturbance fades, Kurt glances down at his clothes and exhales with a prayer of thanks that he managed to avoid the shower of dirt relatively unscathed.

A few tiny spots. Nothing that cannot be blotted out, he thinks as he straightens his sleeves. He stands up straight and feels his drenched foot squish into his shoe. That, however, is unaccepta—

The moment of silence is torn to shreds as a larger, more human-esque creature emerges from the mud, breaching out of the moat and reaching for the pig, flailing to grab at it and missing it by a hair.

“Shite!” the mud man bellows, watching the animal scrabble onto the land and bolt away. “That be the third fuckin’ time this …” The man shakes his head like a hound, clearing the mud from his ears, sending it raining Kurt’s way. Kurt flattens himself as close to the castle wall as he can manage without actually touching it to avoid a second spray.

“Watch yerself!” Kurt barks.

The man turns his head to look at Kurt, a scowl on his face that transforms into a wicked grin when he notices the pristinely-dressed man standing in a recess, shielding his fine clothing from the sludge ever-present around them.

“Come ag’in?” the man says, his body sinking below the surface of the mud with his folded arms on the wood plank holding his head and shoulders above.

“Take care, ye. I’m to be lord of this …” Kurt looks around at the weathered stone behind him and almost whimpers with despair, “castle, and I have no need to be tackled free of my senses by the likes of ye.”

It wasn’t normally in Kurt’s nature to behave like a pretentious snob. At home, he did his best to remain humble, and was beloved by his clan because of it – because aside from his occasional high-maintenance, he was a kind and compassionate man, a trait his father attributed with pride to Kurt’s poor deceased mother. But Kurt’s father had warned him about the men of the Lowlands, how they take all for themselves and care nothing for others. He warned Kurt and he reminded Kurt that he was a lord, even if he was to carry that title in the Lowlands. Kurt had to show the scum of the earth bastards that lived there that he wouldn’t be pushed around.

The man in the moat smiles at Kurt’s scolding, rising from the mud as if he were born of it.

“Forgive my state of undress, my lord, as I were chasing down a boar what’s been plaguing the lambs.” The man stood more fully, revealing a shirt that had been once white, slathered in mud and most likely dung.

Had he once been wearing a proper kilt or stockings, they were lost to him now.

His shirt helps little in keeping him modest.

Kurt averts his eyes with an irritated and affronted gasp.

“Could ye possibly be possessed of somethin’ to cover yer nethers?” he snaps.

“Why?” the man asks, opening his arms wide, causing the shirt to rise up his thighs a sliver, almost exposing him to God and country. “I’ve nothin’ that ye have not beheld before.”

“Nay, just in smaller quantity, I wager.”

Kurt expects the man to be furious at this jab at his endowments, but it only makes the knave’s smirk brighter.

“Ooo,” he coos, approaching as Kurt turns his head to face away, negotiating the narrow plank as though he has done it dozens of times before. “That’s quite a mouth on ye.”

“Not that ye’ll ever know,” Kurt hisses, backing a blind step away. “And careful, swine. My tartan be worth ten of ye.”

“Is that so?”

“Aye,” Kurt says with an emphatic nod as the man closes in. “Ten of ye, yer kin, and all of yer filthy possessions combined.”

“And are ye sure of that?” the man asks, his voice soft … and almost inviting.

“Oh, of that I be quite sure,” Kurt returns icily, cursing himself when his voice shakes. The man looks to say something back when a third voice enters the fray.

“Have ye caught it yet?” the feminine voice from above yells down to the mud-covered man below.

“Nay, Elspeth,” the man hollers back, his eyes not removed from Kurt’s blushing face. “Not yet.”

Kurt looks upward to catch sight of the woman, though mainly to hide his blazing cheeks, and he hears the man in front of him chuckle. His laugh is a smooth, melodic sound that carries with it heat – a heat that hits those places Kurt keeps carefully hidden, especially from the likes of bastards like this.

“Mind ye, make haste, lad,” the woman replies. “We’ve got company arrivin’ … oh …” The woman – leaning halfway out of a high window - spies Kurt huddled against the wall. The window cuts her at the mid-thigh, and when she leans forward, Kurt fears she will topple out. She smiles warmly at him, bobbing him an elegant, if awkward, curtsy. “Oh, m’lord. You’re here. And I see ye have a’ready met.”

Now that he has full view of her, Kurt remembers this woman. He recalls her accompanying the emissary who visited his father’s estate to arrange his match (he realizes that, of course, in retrospect). She seemed a pleasant enough woman, though at the time finely dressed, which is why when she looks down upon him, wearing what appears to be a drab pewter shift, her hair covered in a cap stained off-white with age, she is nigh unrecognizable.

“Aye, we have,” Kurt sniffs. “If tis of import that I meet your gamekeeper before my intended, then I guess I shoulda be glad. Shall I be meeting the kitchen staff next?”

The portly woman looks at Kurt agog, the air around them still as she begins to understand his words, and then she laughs, hearty and from her belly, as if Kurt had finished telling the bawdiest tale she has ever heard in her life.

“M’lord,” she says, lifting her apron to her eyes to wipe away her amused tears, “ye’ve got yerself a feisty one there, lord. Ye keep an eye on that one - dressed like a prince, but with the wit of the devil, he has.”

Kurt takes his turn to gawk, for he hasn’t a single notion what she’s talking about. Lord? She’s not addressing him. Had his betrothed walked on to the scene without his knowing? Kurt turns his head in search of him, but no one else can he see. Just the woman above him, and the rogue before him, moving toward Kurt, stalking him like prey, keeping a keen eye locked to Kurt’s surprised face.

“Nay,” the insufferable man says. “Ye have it wrong. I be not the gamekeeper. I be the man yer gonna marry.”

Kurt stares back into the man’s golden eyes - golden as the wheat that blanketed the knoll out yonder, shining like the sun in the blue sky above, and beautiful as the day is long. But that will not protect him from Kurt’s ire as he readies to tear into the man for his ludicrous claim, preparing to promise him the flogging of his life. But for all his inappropriate swagger, Kurt can see no lie in this man’s eyes, and it steals his bravery away.

“Wh-what?” Kurt asks, breathless when he prayed he wouldn’t be, but he can’t help it. Those eyes hold him prisoner.

They know more than they’re telling.

“Aye,” the woman says from the window, dismissing both men with another laugh. “Ye be in the presence of Blaine, Chief of the Clan Colquhoun, Laird of Loch Lomond.”

Kurt looks at the man covered in mud - the man whose shirt clings to him in sinful, tempting ways; the smile on his smug face nearly splitting his face in two. He looks like a demon, with gleaming white teeth and shining eyes, muscular limbs on full display, sun-kissed skin covered in mud except for a spot at his neck that glitters with a silver chain hanging askew, the crest of a noble plastered against his collarbone.

Holy hell, Kurt thinks. Tis him to be certain – Kurt’s soon-to-be husband.

“Oh … sh-shite,” Kurt breathes, and the man before him laughs so loudly, it makes Kurt’s ears ring. If there is a God up there in all the heavens, Kurt thinks, rolling his eyes back with a low groan, please strike me dead where I stand.

#klaine fanfiction #klaine fic #klaine #frankie writes

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #477

“hell doesn’t want them  /  hell doesn’t need them  /  hell doesn’t love them”

Which breed of dog do you find most scary? I'm not scared of them personally, but the sheer potential of the Tibetan mastiff is terrifying. I mean the thing hunts bears. What’s the secret to your success? What success? Do you keep any photos in your wallet? Yes, of some of my nieces and nephews. I need to organize my wallet and get all of them... Would you ever wear a white tuxedo? Eek, I think white wouldn't look good on me. I'd wear a black one, though. Do you prefer brown or white bread? Brown/wheat. Have you ever spent an entire day in bed? Ohhhh yes. I did that for years, literally until yesterday. I used to do everything in my bed. Now I've finally moved into the spare room when I'm on my laptop. Don’t you just find it annoying when people get too much plastic surgery? No? Do what you want with your body, boo. Whose birthday is next, out of all the people you know? My boyfriend's. Do you have embarrassing parents? Dad can be embarrassing. What’s something that really matters to you? My mental health. Tell me something interesting about one of your close relatives: Uhhh. I'm blanking. I'm not really close to my extended family. Do you like the smell of freshly-mown grass? NO NO NO I HATE IT. If given the opportunity, would you employ a monkey-servant? Absofuckinglutely not. That's horrible animal abuse. Do you get a lot of earwax (don’t be shy)? Yes. It's partially why I got wax adhered to my eardrums: I was pushing too much back with using q-tips too much. Do you find green eyes attractive? Very. Who depends on you the most? My pets. Would you ever donate a kidney to anyone, and who? My mother comes to mind absolutely instantly, given she only has one kidney. Can you really be racist to a white person? It's possible to be racist towards any race... I've never understood this question. What was the first website you made an account on? I want to say Neopets. Do you listen to any podcasts? No. I'd love to listen to Mark, Bob, and Wade's, I'm just so bad with keeping up with podcasts. I've tried. Do you prefer long or short surveys? Long ones, if you couldn't tell. I combine surveys for a reason: I'd be spamming the FUCK out this place otherwise. Do you enjoy making YouTube videos or just watching? Watching. I miss making them honestly, but I just don't have the motivation to dedicate to even a short project. When I edited videos, I was VERY slow at it, and I just don't wanna invest the time anymore. Do you think vlogging in public is scary? I would be MORTIIFED. I don't know how some people can do it so confidently. Would you want to be in a collab channel on YouTube? I could see myself having a gaming channel where I was either with a friend or s/o. It'd be fun, like chilling on the couch and just chatting while playing. Not trying to be funny or anything, just... chillin'. Some people (myself included) enjoy that content. Have you been to an escape room? Was it a success? I haven't, but it'd be cool. Have you ever recorded a cover of a song? No. Do you prefer hoodies or sweaters more during the autumn? Hoodies. What's the best Halloween costume you had as a kid? I don't remember. Does family come to your home for the holidays, or do you go to theirs? We go to my older sister's place. Have you been diagnosed with CoVid-19 since the pandemic began? Not yet, but I'm getting tested Friday. How often do your pets have to visit the vet? Venus, essentially never unless she has a serious issue. Reptile doctors aren't very available here. Roman has only been to the vet once to get neutered. And I think his shots? How many times have you been in the hospital in your lifetime thus far? A good number of times. Cheese-Itz. Cheese Balls, Goldfish, or Cheetos? Ohhh, I think I have to go with Goldfish, but I like them all, save or Cheese Balls. Have you ever made your own trail mix before? What did you put in it? No. What is your favorite thing to eat alongside peanut butter? Chocolate. Do your pets sleep on the furniture or in their own pet beds? Venus is obviously in her terrarium, usually sleeping behind her water bowl. Roman always sleeps in my bed snuggling me. :') If you have dogs, how often do you take them for walks? We don't have a dog. Does anything on your body cause you chronic pain? Any chronic illnesses? Yes, my legs. I have chronic mental illnesses for sure. What is your favorite Thanksgiving food? Just rolls, ha ha. I'm not a fan of Thanksgiving food in general. Would you prefer cake or pie as a birthday treat? Cake; I don't like pie. What is something annoying about the person you like/love? Nothing he does really annoys me. What is something that makes you feel old? My knees and energy level in general, ha ha. And how early I can go to sleep nowadays. When's the last time you experienced a panic attack? Over what? Hm... I don't like to abuse the term panic attack, so I'm not entirely sure. I'm definitely familiar with them, but shit's gotta be pretty extreme for me to consider it a genuine panic attack and not an anxiety attack. Which professions do you feel deserve the highest amount of pay? Probably surgeons. Do you donate to a specific charity or cause on an annual basis? No, but I desperately wish I could. :/ What's the highest amount of money you received in a card? I want to say $300? My paternal grandpa was way, WAY too generous. Like seriously, I think the dude met my sisters and me ONCE. I really do wish I'd taken up Dad's offers to go to Michigan with him before he passed away. I only turned it down because he didn't have WiFi, which is a horrible, selfish excuse. I wanted to know him better. Did you get any scholarships or grants towards your education? I think? Have you ever wondered what your pets are saying to you? Roman? ALL the time, especially because when I talk to him, he usually answers in his own kind of meow. It's adorable. Have you ever had to turn someone in before? For what? No. Describe a time where one of your parents embarrassed you. Oh my goddddd. When Dad was helping me take care of my laptop when it was broken, he was consistently SO rude to the employees, convinced they were trying to scam him into paying more money. Which they certainly weren't. I wanted to DIE when we were in that store. Do you prefer grapes, raisins, or prunes? Grapes. The other two are gross. Have you ever had a party when your parents weren't home? No. What is something that irks you about your sibling(s)? Nothing. They're wonderful women. If you get married, will you take your spouse's last name? Yes, please get rid of my last name. Do you still eat Lunchables as an adult? Hell yeah, man. What's your favorite comfort food? Ice cream. If you had to work in a store, which would you choose, and why? An actually good pet store. Not a chain one that gets their pets from breeding farms and doesn't know jack shit about the animals. You won't ever see me adopt a pet, especially a reptile, from places like PetSmart and Petco. They are so goddamn ignorant. Hell, I'd probably be willing to work with people if I was an employee in a proper pet store, because I'd be so excited about the animals and helping them get adopted into homes that will suit and treat them well. If you were a teacher, which subject would you teach? English or science. Do you spend a lot of time outdoors in the summer? Hell no, I HATE summer. Do you have a desk in your room? Not my bedroom, no, but in the spare room/my "office," I do. I've finally moved into there to get out of my bed except for sleeping. I'll tell you, my back sure hurts, though. What did your favorite backpack in high school look like? Yo, I had the COOLEST Ouija board backpack. The zipper was even a planchette. Do you wear band tees? Of course. Frosting: chocolate or vanilla? Chocolateeeee. Ice cream: chocolate or vanilla? Depends on my mood. Do you drink protein shakes? No, I can't stand the taste. What is the highest name-brand thing you own? Nothing unrealistically expensive. What color GameBoy did you have as a kid? Red. What was your favorite GameBoy game? Man, I can't pick! My sisters and I had a whole lot. Do you have a PayPal account? No. Would you be interested in building a water feature for a garden? If *I* wasn't the one building it, sure, ha ha. A koi pond would be amazing. Do you consider the letter "Y" a consonant or a vowel? I see it as a consonant, but I know it can be a vowel. Pick a side, Y. Would you rather wear a tie or a bowtie? Hm, idk. Which birds are most common around your neighbourhood? Sparrows or robins? Idk. Are you the kind of person to look at accident sites, when passing them by? Admittedly, yes. Morbid curiosity is real. Have you ever seen a polydactyl cat? Only online. Are there any languages you could try to work out what some words mean? A good deal of German, probably. What is your dearest stuffed animal that you own? Why is that? My stuffed moose Brownie, which I got from Cabela's in Ohio. I cuddled him every night as a kid for MANY years. He's on my shelf now. <3 Have you ever had to try to pronounce words that have letters with umlauts? That's common in German, so. Are you more an Eeyore, a Piglet, or a Tigger? I'm Eeyore and Piglet's child. Name something awesome from another culture that is not part of yours: I'm not educated enough on other cultures to answer this, sadly. What are you grateful for NOT having? Various health conditions. What do you think is the most interesting sea creature? Man-o-wars. I mean c'mon, they have no brain. Do you currently own any teddy bears? Yeah, stored away. Have you ever caught fireflies? All the time as a little kid! My sisters and I loved that. Do you know anyone who has changed their first name? Not legally (to my knowledge), but I have a number of trans friends who have. Do you know anyone who has been on life support, and survived? No. At least, I don't think so. Do your parents have a strong relationship together? Holy fuck no. What was the last necklace you wore? It was my bottlecap one with the Halo of the Sun from Silent Hill 3 as the center. If there was such a thing as a mental health first aid kit, what would you want to be in it? Can it only be physical items? If that's the case, gimme a bit of candy, some money for a tattoo, a Mountain Dew, a new meerkat plushie to cuddle, a weighted blanket... Stuff like that.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''the devil's rejects'' by rob zombie

[prompt-master]

Ice Ice Baby

Anon asked: hi! Ohmygosh, ive just read every single one of your bmc fics, I love them so much! If you’re not too busy, could I request a fic where Michael gets sick from falling in a cold lake or something? Thank you so much

Flattery…will get you everywhere my friend.

–

It was a fucking disaster. Maybe if Jeremy had listened to him for once, just once, in his damn life. But no, it was a different kind of mountain dew so of course it’d be ok! Don’t listen to Did-All-The-Necessary-Reach Michael Mell, why would you fucking do that?

And even worse? It was cold, unbearably so. Michael’s face felt numb and bitter even though he was running. He had a thick winter jacket one that he was struggling to put his hood up for, he didn’t have time to put on gloves, a scarf, or a hat. He just threw on a coat, some boots, and booked it out his front door. He was still in his Metroid pajamas, his numb fingers barely able to hit call on Jeremy’s contact. He cringed whenever the Bluetooth headphones he was wearing immediately went to voicemail. He wanted to throw his phone. What a dumbass.

Jeremy had messaged him not to long ago: can’t control it, at the hideout.

Fuck. Michael shouldn’t have left him alone. Michael didn’t even want to leave him alone. No it was because his mom so desperatly needed him to help out with the cooking. Now his friend was probably possessed and doing who knows what in the woods. The hideout refers to an old hangout spot the two used to go to in their middle school years. It was a dinky little wooden bridge surrounded by dead forest and a lake. During the winter they used to test fate and walk across the lake. Michael had almost forgotten all about it.

“You have reached the voicemail box of-”

“Fucking hell Jer”

Michael hissed at his hands, skin cracking in the cold. If it was this bad for him who was in a rush, he wondered what Jeremy was wearing, who wasn’t even in control? The SQUIP could be having Jeremy sitting in a pile of snow in nothing by a t-shirt and shorts.

Michael shoved his phone into his pocket, ducking into the woods along the memorized path he and Jer carved out years ago. Years before a stupid computer chip got in the way.

“Jeremy!”

Silence, aside from Michael’s harsh breathing and footsteps. He almost wanted to take his coat off from all the heat getting to him.

“Jer! Answer me!”

He neared the bridge now, grabbing onto the splintering railing and pulling himself up, the bridge twisting and creaking with his weight. He held himself over the edge of the bridge, arms shaking holding him up, as if he were about to throw up. God this was so much stress. He could barely breath from the cold and the running and the anxiety. He took a moment to collect hinself, hoping to hear his best friends voice. But he didn’t.

He lifted his head again, another gulp being pulled into his lungs, “Jeremy!”

His eyes scaled the white forest, looking for Jeremy. He ended up finding a trail of footprints that weren’t his own. More calculated and calm. He followed them, until he saw Jeremy staring at him from the ice, just below the bridge.

Michael almost dropped with relief, arching himself back over the edge, “Jer…who am I talking to? Please tell me it’s you pal cuz I am so not in the mood for stopping another technology take over.”

Jeremy’s expression was cold, he looked across the features of the bridge then back to Michael, “You ruined my plans before.”

Michael glared, clutching the Red in his inner coat pocket, “And you ruined Jeremy’s life.”

“I question your definition of ruined.” His tone was blunt, yet teasing, “I should be thanking you really.”

Michael didn’t like the sound of that, “…Why?”

“Well you told Jeremy the website you got all your…valuble SQUIP Intel from. And now, poof, all gone. Meaning the only threat left to SQUIPS…” his eyes trailed back up to Michael, unwavering.

“…What are you doing here though?”

A smirk crossed Jeremy’s face, he stepped back from the bridge, “luring you in of course!”

“Wha-”

The SQUIP could tell in an instant that the support of the bridge was weak, and with one throw of a rock the whole thing came tumbling down, dragging Michael down into ice with it.

With bitter cold instantly snapping and biting at his skin, Michael was thrown into a directionless heap in the water. Up or down was nothing to him, and the panic pounding in his chest did nothing to stop the chilling thought that he could die. The way his mind slowed down was so different from the highs he was used to, this was an uncomfortable numbing force that was pushing pressure against his eyes and sapping away all ability to move. He could hear nothing but a ringing noise, and the last thing he saw was a hand reaching out for him.

“Michael! Michael!”

The shock of seeing Michael drop through ice was enough to snap Jeremy back into control of his own body. He couldn’t believe what he was looking at it. He shook his numb hands, shaking from the static running through them, and stumbled over to the hole Michael disappeared into.

He took fearful gulps of air, “Oh god…oh man I don’t- what do I do?”

He ignored the SQUIP mocking him in the back of his head, and blindly reached his hand into the murky water, gasping at the sharp embrace like ants. He reached in until his cheek was pressed against the water and he felt something brush against his fingertips. He instantly latched onto the heavy mass and pulled Michael out of the water.

He gasped and held his completely numb arm to his chest, trying to calm his rising panic, “M…Michael…oh god Michael…!”

He ran over to Michael, scrambling to grab him. He was so incredibly cold. Jeremy almost went into a full panicked state when he grabbed onto Michael’s arms. He let out a dry sob, cried “shit..!” And rolled Michael onto his back. His head rolled dead to the side, eyes open a sliver only showing the whites.

“No..no please…oh fuck Michael please” he shook him by the shoulders, watching Michael’s cold face move with it.

Panic was setting more and more in now, holding onto his heart. In the corner of his eye he saw the SQUIP, standing over him and Michael with their cold eyes glowing down. They watched Jeremy lightly smack his friends face again and again, begging him to stay alive.

With a deep shaky breath Jeremy left his hand pressed against Michael’s face, his skin was so unnaturally cold and now he was laying in the snow-

“…Are you going to check if he’s breathing or are you just going to keep crying?”

Jeremy looked up at the SQUIP in shock, pure unblinking shock.

“Don’t get me wrong,” the SQUIP started, reading Jeremy’s mind, “I’m only helping because you just put your DNA all over him and I’d rather not have a host accused of murder.”

Jeremy pursed his lips together and held his hand over Michael’s face. He held his breath, nearly feeling faint until he recgoznied the warm breaths against his freezing skin. He nearly collapsed from relief, and laid on Michael’s chest, listening to the wheezing breaths he was pulling in.

He let himself feel suddenly exhausted, breathing out a “he’s okay…”

But he was still unconscious and numbingly cold. Pressing his hand against his face, Jeremy thought his hand was gonna stick to the skin. Michael’s head rolled limply, his mouth parted slighted. Jeremy pulled Michael closer to himself, wrapping his arms around him tightly. He looked up at the SQUIP and felt a furious anger and disgust, but held it down in favor of helping Michael. He needed him this time.

“Wise decision Jeremiah.”

Jeremy took a deep breath to calm himself, “What do I do? He’s…he’s so cold”

“You need to get him warmed up, but not too quickly. It would probably be ideal to just bring him to a hospital in a car”

Jeremy frowned, “…But I can’t drive”

“I can.”

It was a terrible idea and honestly Michael was going to kill him for it when he found out, but he lifted Michael into his back and dragged him all the way back to his house and into his cruiser. Thing is, Michael always keeps his keys on him. So not only was Jeremy illegally driving but he was illegally driving in a friends car. Maybe he should just call an ambulance- no no. His parents are home and he can’t wait out in the snow. He couldn’t deal with Mrs Mell right now, she’d probably stab him in the throat or something. After all it is entirely his fault.

Jeremy was tense, white knuckled and wide eyed. Every now and then he’d glance at Michael, shivering in the passenger seat, only to get scolded by the SQUIP.

“Eyes on the road” he kept saying.

But Michael looked awful. He’d stripped the boy of his hoodie, he couldn’t bring himself to take off Michael’s pants and he wasn’t wearing a shirt under the hoodie anyway. Melted snow dripped down his brow from his hair, he was so still and silent aside from thin breaths.

“Eyes on the road.”

But Michael looked awful-

“Eyes on the road.”

But Michael was dying right next to him and he was going to be too late.

“Eyes on the road Jeremy!” His hands lost control, turning the wheel sharply to the left. Jeremy felt his breath catch in his throat, eyes darting from Michael to the highbeams blinding him, suddenly aware of all the honking behind him. The car swerved back where it belonged, Jeremy had been drifting out of the lane.

Once he realized he was safe he slumped over, letting out a breath.

“Jeremy you are driving illegally and if you prefer not to be caught I suggest you pay more attention”

Jeremy glanced up, his hands were still being controlled by the SQUIP, “…Can you just…”

He never thought he’d ask the SQUIP for help twice in one day.

“Can you keep doing it like this?”

“…If I must. But keep your eyes on the road nonetheless, I can only see what you and other SQUIPS can see.”

Jeremy nodded, only sparing another quick glance at his friend.

“Please please hang in there Michael”

———– “How did this happen again?”

Jeremy looked at his feet, noticing how one of the floor tiles were the wrong color.

“We were…uh…messing around on the ice. Just being yknow, stupid.” He pulled at his sleeves, stretching them out.

“Son you’re plenty old enough to know how dangerous that is-”

“I know I know I’m really sorry can I just…see him again?”

The man sighed, “Fine, be more careful next time. He could have died”

Jeremy gave a low whisper, “I know.”

Stepping into the room Jeremy could see nothing but Michael, he had been in the hospital for a few hours now. He already looked better, warmer. Jeremy sat by his side with his gameboy out, hoping to be there when he woke up.

And he was. But the problem was Michael also had a fever.

Now that Michael wasn’t dying though he was allowed to go home despite the fever, they prescribed some fever reducers and sent him on his way.

Jeremy had his dad come and pick him up, he’d explain how he got here to Michael later. In the backseat of the car Jeremy couldn’t keep his eyes off of Michael’s flushed face.

Michael groaned, sinking into his hoodie as if he was still cold, but leaned his head against the glass window as if he was hot.

“Mr. Heere,” Jeremy cringed, Michael’s voice sounded awful, “Do I have to go home? My mom is gonna kill me…”

“She’s just worried sport, can’t blame her. I know the feeling.” Mr. Heere gave a quick glance back at Jeremy.

“I’ll try and see if you can spend the night, but you gotta face her eventually.” He smiled back and flexed his arm, “Gotta take it like a man!”

Michael dryly laughed. The next second his expression was serious, peering into Jeremy’s worried eyes, “I’m fine Jer.”

“…but-”

“I’m fine.” Michael looked out the window again. The car ride was silent.

Michael ended up being able to sleep over. Because of Jeremy’s insistence he was laying in his best friends bed. Michael groaned, laying a hand over his hot sweaty forehead, his eyes were lost and dazed. He glanced over at Jeremy who had just walked back into the room carrying a glass of water for Michael.

“You ok? I’m not gonna die you know.”

Jeremy frowned and pressed the glass into Michael’s hand, “I’m still worried though, you almost did die after all”

Michael laughed, “it’s ok dude” he pressed the glass to his lips, taking gulps of water down. He finished the glass without even realizing it, he pulled the glass away and smiled shyly at Jeremy.

“You have a pretty bad fever you know” it was 102 last they’d checked. “What do I do if it gets higher”

“It won’t.”

“You don’t know that” Jeremy stood up, grabbing the glass. “I’m gonna refill your water-”

Michael grabbed his wrist as he turned away, “hey.”

Jeremy turned, his face void of any readable expression, but Michael knew.

“It’s not your fault.”

Jeremy shut his eyes, took a deep breath, and let it go. He nodded and wiggled out of Michael’s grip, “okay.”

For now the best he could do was help Michael feel better, then he could cope with the guilt.

#bmc #be more chill #boyf riends #fan fic

[the-record-newspaper]

Wilkes reacts to COVID-19

From Record Staff Reports

With schools called off statewide in North Carolina for at least two weeks, Wilkes County Schools will offer breakfasts and lunches for children ages 1 through 18.

The meals started being offered on Tuesday, March 17. Meals may be picked up at the school site in the car line with the exception being Wilkes Early College High School, which is on the campus of Wilkes Community College.

Breakfasts will be served from 7:30 a.m. until 8:30 a.m. and lunch will be served from 11:30 a.m. until 12:30 p.m.

This information was released Monday afternoon following a minimal two-week school cancellations which was announced over the weekend.

On Tuesday The Governor closed dinning rooms in restaurants limiting food services to only take out and deliver. He assured that grocery stores would remain open, but urged citizens not to hoard and to leave items for people who can’t afford to stockpile food and other commodities.

Wilkes County has suddenly become a different world.

If you’ve been to the grocery store recently, you’ve bound to have noticed the toilet paper section.

It’s basically empty.

Why?

Folks across Wilkes, the state and the country are hoarding such items including hand sanitizers and bottled water it seems in case there is a mass mandated quarantine to halt or slow the spread of COVID-19.

But…toilet paper?

The New York Times quoted Health Secretary Alex M. Azar II as saying, “Toilet paper is not an effective way to prevent getting the coronavirus, but they’re selling out.”

Although there may be humor in that statement, local, state and national officials are not taking the threat of the spread of COVID-19 lightly.

And as of Sunday afternoon, the virus was knocking at Wilkes’ door with one confirmed case in Watauga County and possible cases under investigation in Yadkin County.

Although there have been talk of COVID-19 already being in Wilkes, no such report had been substantiated.

The Tribune in Elkin reported that there are two persons under investigation who have been tested for the corona virus, or COVID-19 as of Friday at 12:30 p.m. in Yadkin County. These individuals have been informed about the virus and how it is spread and are self-monitoring while waiting test results, according to a news release from Yadkin County Human Services Agency.

WBTV, a Charlotte-based television station, reported that a Boone-based staff member of the international relief charity Samaritan’s Purse tested positive for the coronavirus shortly after returning from an overseas trip.

According to the company, the employee returned nine days ago from countries “considered to be at lower risk at the time of travel.”

The staff member didn’t return to work and self-quarantined upon their return home. They were tested at their home by the Watauga County Health Department.

“We are working in full cooperation with the local health department in identifying other staff who may have been in contact with the employee who has tested positive, and though we can’t know for sure whether their contact was prior to or after the virus was contracted, each of these employees has also self-quarantined,” the organization said. The organization said it is reducing staff on its Boone headquarters and Wilkes campus effective immediately and moving many employees to work-from-home status, the WBTV report stated.

In Wilkes, and across North Carolina, schools are cancelled, MerleFest has been cancelled as well as many church services and most any other event where people usually gather in significant numbers.

As of Tuesday there have been 32 confirmed cases reported statewide. The counties which reported confirmed cases are: 14 in Wake County; four in Mecklenburg; two apiece in Hartnett, Johnston and Forsyth counties; and one apiece in Durham, Brunswick, Craven, Chatham, Cabarrus, Onslow, Wayne, Brunswick, Craven, and Watauga counties

***

According to the website for Centers for Disease Control and Prevention you should call your doctor if you think you have been exposed to COVID-19 and develop a fever and symptoms, such as cough or difficulty breathing.

Watch for symptoms.

Reported illnesses have ranged from mild symptoms to severe illness and death for confirmed coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19) cases.

The following symptoms may appear 2-14 days after exposure.*

·         Fever

·         Cough

·         Shortness of breath

*This is based on what has been seen previously as the incubation period of MERS-CoV viruses.

If you develop emergency warning signs for COVID-19 get medical attention immediately. Emergency warning signs include*:

·         Difficulty breathing or shortness of breath

·         Persistent pain or pressure in the chest

·         New confusion or inability to arouse

·         Bluish lips or face

*This list is not all inclusive. Please consult your medical provider for any other symptoms that are severe or concerning.

***

Record Editor Jerry Lankford asked some of his Facebook friends their thoughts on the virus. Here’s what they said:

Ashley Osborne Jones: “I’m not afraid. I am not stocking up on anything. I don’t live in fear. I have faith that I will be OK. If not I have already on hand two weeks worth of food and supplies.”

Melissa Triplett: “I’m not afraid. ‘Fear not, for I am with you, be not dismayed, for I am your God, I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:103.’”

Rebecca Davis: “I could stand to shed some pounds. So with what food we have it will make do. We have growing grandchildren to feed in the home. They love to eat cereal. So milk, cereal, bread, peanut butter, jelly and eggs.”

Leslie Michelle Rivera-Cruz: “Not afraid at all. I’m only afraid of the consequences of fear.”

William M. Harden: “I’m not afraid but it’s because I have done my research on it. At the same time I’m not recklessly acting like it’s no big deal. I’m a young healthy man, but not everyone has my immune system. Not afraid of catching it (is very likely at some point) but am concerned for the elderly/youth/immune compromised that will have a harder time fighting it off. Stay educated and don’t panic you guys, it will only make the situation worse.”

Kellene Wells Bock: “I have a healthy respect for the virus but I’m not afraid. I think the steps being taken now should keep it to manageable status in the U.S. Not stocking up on anything because I don’t foresee steps taken in foreign countries being necessary in the U.S. (if people will just be smart) so we should be able to get what we need, once shelves get restocked.”

Anne Privette Johnson: “As an elderly woman with underlying health concerns Mom plans to stick close to the house. I made sure her prescriptions were filled and we have all her OTC meds. We keep toilet paper and paper towels on hand. I checked the pantry and inventoried cleaning supplies. We were in pretty good shape, so I picked up just a few things we needed. With schools closed I will be here more. I bought some breakfast items and sandwich fixings. I guess I didn’t stock up - just the normal grocery shopping. Prayers for everyone.”

Andy Rhodes: “I’m more afraid of main stream media hype than Covid19. Get your info from the CDC, not the nightly news frenzy of doom and gloom. Will I get Covid19, probably so, I am a nurse in a health care setting, am I worried? A little, but I’m confident all will be OK.” 

Alayna Taylor Harden:  “I’m far more bothered by/afraid of the hysteria than the actual virus. I know it’s a threat to certain people in our communities (and I say this as someone who has a compromised immune system and small kids), but this is far beyond reasonable precautions. The fact that sheer panic has been manufactured by the media is a very scary thing on its own.” 

Lisa De Maio Brewer: “This is a very concerning virus. We've never seen anything like this in our lifetime. If we do not take it seriously, we will face the sad consequences. Seek wisdom!”

Terrie Byrd:  “Yes I'm self quarantined due to my immune system not functioning properly. I'm both immune deficient and immune compromised. What I have in terms of antibodies fighting germs comes from 1,000 to 1,500 people in the form of plasma which I need to live. This is serious folks. Even with infusions, we  are not protected from COVID 19. Please take care of yourself and follow the CDC guidelines. It's not a joke. It's real and it's here. Stay ahead of the curve. God bless us all. I'm in no way panicking, just being vigilant and exercising caution.”

Rita Roman: “I've been preparing for this for years and years.... food and water...oops forgot about the toilet paper. I'm staying motivated and happy. P.S. Just got off a cruise last Sunday. Everyone is staying in touch via Facebook. No one is sick. Living my life!!!”

Cheryl Shumate: “Well I’m 63 yrs old and yes I’m taking this very seriously. I have diabetes and an immune deficiency disorder along with several other problems. I’m staying in away from people as much as I can. I’m not one that bought 100 rolls of TP but I would like to have gotten a bottle of hand sanitizer for when I am out. Thinking of all the elderly we have in our county. I do pray daily for our nation and watch CDC updates.”

Jill Minton Woodie: “I remember when I was a young girl hearing a preacher talking about a pandemic that would affect the entire World and there would be thousands of people die from it. I really hadn’t thought of this message until this pandemic. This is very serious and I’m afraid it is going to get a lot worse. It is no joking matter. We are dealing with a virus that the mortality rate is 10 times worse than the flu, no medicine or vaccine. Also, a person can have the virus and show no symptoms and that is why we need to stay home. The United States don’t have enough ventilators to handle this crisis. We all have got to work together and help stop the spread of this virus. People if at all possible stay home and use common sense that the LORD gave you. GOD HELP US.”

So far, there have been no reports of business closures in Wilkes due to the virus.

Tyson Foods has released its virus-related policy:

The company announced that it is only allowing visitors considered essential into its offices and facilities. The determination of who is essential will be made by Enterprise Leadership Team (ELT) members.

Tyson Foods also announced changes impacting hourly employees, including:

• relaxing attendance policies in processing plants by eliminating punitive effect for missing work due to illness;

• waiving the five-consecutive day waiting period for short term disability benefits;

• waiving the co-pay, co-insurance and deductible for doctor visits for COVID-19 testing as well as eliminating pre-approval or preauthorization steps;

• waiving co-pays for use of telemedicine;

• relaxing refill limits for 30 day prescriptions of maintenance medication.

Many corporate Tyson employees will work remotely through March 27.

Management will determine which business personnel will be asked to continue working in the corporate offices while others operate from home.

Late last month, Tyson Foods suspended all international business travel on commercial carriers. Effective immediately, all U.S. commercial business travel has also been suspended. Exceptions must be approved by an (ELT) member.

The company encouraged Tyson personnel to avoid personal travel via cruise ships, airplanes and other common carriers.

“Depending on where you travel, you may be subject to self-quarantine for 14 days when you return. You should consider this and your ability to work remotely before traveling.”

The CDC says “currently there is no evidence to support transmission of COVID-19 associated with food.”

In addition, the U.S. Department of Agriculture reported, “There is no evidence at this time to suggest that the Coronavirus is a foodborne pathogen.”

The USDA also said, “We are not aware of any reports at this time of human illnesses that suggest COVID-19 can be transmitted by food or food packaging.”

Tyson has an internal coronavirus page with access to videos and information about the virus, as well as the company’s efforts to address it. 

Schools Closed

Wilkes County Schools will be closed for at least two weeks.

This comes as a directive from N.C. Gov. Roy Cooper who ordered all K-12 public schools in North Carolina to close for a minimum of two weeks in response to COVID-19. The executive order also bans gatherings of more than 100 people.

Cooper stated: “We do not have the luxury of a wait-and-see approach. These are hard decisions but they are necessary so we can learn more about the virus,” Cooper said. “We do not want any regrets in the rearview mirror, and I am guided by one objective – doing what we must to keep people from getting sick and to make sure that those who do can get excellent care.”

Wilkes County School Superintendent Mark Byrd in a recorded message sent out Sunday.

Byrd stated, “Monday, March 16 will be a required teacher workday. Bus drivers, teacher assistants and child nutrition workers should not report to work until you have further information.

“Parents will be contacted early this week by your child’s school with information about how you can help your child focus on learning during this two-week window. Our website and social media will be updated with information about what students can do to obtain meal service during this closure, beginning Tuesday, March 17.”

Wilkes Community College

All classes on all campuses of Wilkes Community   College have been cancelled for a week.

The college website states: Wilkes Community   College is adjusting its class schedule in accordance with guidance from state and local officials to proactively limit the spread of COVID-19.WCC will cancel all classes (Curriculum, Workforce Development, Career and College Readiness) for the week of March 16-22, 2020. Cancelled classes include all classes regardless of delivery method, including online, on-campus, and off-campus. All WCC facilities will be closed to students including Wilkes Campus, Ashe Campus, Alleghany Center, and Herring Hall.All full-time college employees should report to work on Monday, March 16, unless they are in self-quarantine.On March 23, the college plans to shift to a modified schedule with most classes transitioning to an online, hybrid, or otherwise adjusted format.An update will be provided by Friday, March 20 regarding the following week of classes and campus activities.

MerleFest 2020 Cancelled

For following is a press release posted by MerleFest officials at 4 p.m., on Friday, March 13:

In response to directives from North Carolina Governor Roy Cooper and growing concerns about the spread of the novel coronavirus (COVID-19), Wilkes County officials have cancelled all mass gatherings of more than 100 people in Wilkes County through the end of April. Therefore, MerleFest 2020 has been cancelled. While this decision is disappointing for all of us, we fully support the directive from our county officials. The health, safety, and well-being of all involved with MerleFest is, and always will be, our primary concern.

As you all know, MerleFest serves as the largest fundraising event in support of the students of Wilkes Community College. The WCC Foundation, which plans and manages the festival each year, has already incurred significant costs in the lead up to MerleFest 2020.

We need your help. We are calling on all our loyal MerleFest fans and supporters to help alleviate the financial burden this puts on the college in this unprecedented moment of crisis. Please consider converting your festival purchase this year to a 100 percent tax deductible donation. This will help sustain the mission of MerleFest and its impact on WCC students.

We will be offering three options for those who have purchased MerleFest 2020 tickets through the official MerleFest ticketing system:

Option 1: Convert your purchase to a donation. Convert your festival purchase to a 100 percent tax deductible contribution to the WCC Foundation to help sustain the mission of MerleFest and its impact on WCC students.

Option 2: Roll your tickets forward. Ticket holders may roll purchases over to MerleFest 2021. This option allows fans to retain the same seat, package, parking, ticket, etc. at 2020 prices. The dates for next year’s festival are April 29 – May 2, 2021. Please consider the roll forward option in support of the festival.

Option 3: Refund. If for any reason, you feel that neither option 1 nor 2 is appropriate for you, we can certainly offer you a refund for your ticket order. All refunds must be requested by April 15. We will refund everything except service charges which are non-refundable.

IMPORTANT: All ticket holders must contact the MerleFest box office between March 16 and April 15 to confirm the option you are choosing. Failure to contact the box office by April 15 will result in an automatic roll forward of your tickets to 2021. You can contact the MerleFest box office Monday-Thursday 12 p.m.-5 p.m. and Friday 11 a.m.-3 p.m. Here are four ways to contact us:

Email: [email protected]

Mail: MerleFest Tickets, P.O.  Box 120, Wilkesboro, NC 28697

Phone: [phone]

Visit our box office located in the Walker Center at Wilkes Community College, Wilkesboro, NC

We ask for your patience while we work through the transition process. We will add staff to handle your requests as quickly as possible, but it will just take time. Thank you for your support and we look forward to seeing you at MerleFest in April of 2021! 

MerleFest, a four-day Americana music festival was set to run from Thursday, April 23, to Sunday, April 26, on the campus of Wilkes Community College in Wilkesboro. The event draws upwards to 80,000 participants from all over the country and the world each year and pumps million of dollars into the local economy and is WCC biggest fundraiser. 

The Walker Center, also on the college campus, cancelled its  Haggard Brothers with Special Guest Emi Sunshine concert that was scheduled for Friday, March 13. Center officials says they’re going to try to reschedule the event.

YMCA

Starting Monday and running through at least March 29, Wilkes Family YMCA in Wilkesboro and all other facilities of the YMCA are closed due to the coronavirus.

It was stated in a press release: “After much thoughtful consideration for the health of our members, staff and community as a whole, the YMCA of Northwest North Carolina will temporarily close all facilities. As we navigate these challenges ahead, please know that we never make a decision to close Y facilities in haste.”

N.C. Courts

Chief Justice Beasley Announces Judicial Branch Response to COVID-19 (Coronavirus)Effective Monday, March 16, superior court and district court proceedings will be rescheduled for at least 30 days, with some exceptions.

In an order entered today (Friday, March 13), the Chief Justice has directed that local courts postpone most cases in district and superior court for at least 30 days. While the work of the courts must continue and courthouses remain open, the first priority of the court system must be the health and safety of the public and of the employees who serve them.

“We must be proactive in taking steps to prioritize the health and safety of our fellow North Carolinians while also maintaining the integrity of our judicial system,” said Chief Justice Beasley. “Today’s order will allow us to drastically reduce the exposure caused by crowded sessions of court, which often bring hundreds of people at a time into our courthouses.”

Although the superior courts and district courts remain open, effective Monday, March 16, superior court and district court proceedings will be rescheduled for at least 30 days, with some exceptions. These exceptions include (see more in the Supreme Court Order)

the proceeding will be conducted remotely;

the proceeding is necessary to preserve the right to due process of law (e.g. a first appearance or bond hearing, the appointment of counsel for an indigent defendant, a probation hearing, a probable cause hearing, etc.);

the proceeding is for the purpose of obtaining emergency relief (e.g. a domestic violence protection order, temporary restraining order, juvenile custody order, judicial consent to juvenile medical treatment order, civil commitment order, etc.); or the senior resident superior court judge, chief business court judge, or chief district court judge determines that the proceeding can be conducted under conditions that protect the health and safety of all participants.

This emergency directive does not apply to any proceeding in which a jury has already been empaneled or to any grand juries already empaneled. It also does not prohibit a judge or other judicial officer from exercising any in chambers or ex parte jurisdiction conferred by law upon that judge or judicial officer, as provided by law.

Additionally, the superior courts and district courts are encouraged to liberally grant additional accommodations to parties, witnesses, attorneys, and others with business before the courts who are at high risk of severe illness from COVID-19.  

All counties will post a notice at all court facilities directing any person who has likely been exposed to COVID-19 to not enter the courthouse. Any person who has likely been exposed and has business before the courts should contact the clerk of superior court’s office by telephone or other remote means for further instruction.

As the courts work to postpone thousands of cases, court officials will notify parties and their attorneys of new hearing and trial dates.  

The Judicial Branch will be providing continuous updated information and answers to frequently asked questions on our website, NCcourts.gov. The public is encouraged to visit NCcourts.gov as a first resort to determine if a question can be answered without calling the local courthouse.

Sports and Field Trips

Also on Thursday, March 12, Wilkes County Schools released the following announcement:

“Effective March 12. 2020, Wilkes County Schools will suspend all field trips and will reevaluate this in early April. Wilkes County Schools will follow the recommendation of the NCHSAA (North Carolina High School Athletic Association)

and suspend the Spring Sports Season at the conclusion of tonight’s games (Thursday, March 12, 2020). This decision impacts practices as well as scheduled games for both middle and high schools.

Per the Governor’s recommendation, all gatherings of more than 100 people should be postponed. The governor did not recommend school closings at this time.

Again, we appreciate your understanding as we make decisions to ensure the safety of our students and our staff.”

Other cancellations

VFW: The Welcome Home Vietnam Veterans day, scheduled for Saturday, March 28, at VFW Post 1142 in North Wilkesboro, has been cancelled due to health concerns.

The post also cancelled its popular Saturday night dances until further notice.

The Veterans Coffee Call, that has been held the second Tuesday of each month, has been cancelled until further notice.

Shinetopia, a  benefit concert, cook-off and bike show scheduled April 18 in North Wilkesboro has been cancelled. 

Wilkes Senior Resources has cancelled all instructor-led classes until further notice, effective immediately. The center remains open for individual exercises and other individual activities.

Wilkes-Yadkin Home Builders Association’s annual raffle drawing set for March 19, at the Wilkesboro Civic Center, has been postponed. The drawing, which raises funds for the Joe Faw Scholarship and SkillsUSA, will be held at a later date.

***

But back to the hoarding hysteria

Apparently it has become somewhat out of hand.

One local business manager was heard saying that law enforcement had to be on hand as guards when trucks hauling restock items arrive at their store, and added that thefts of items were becoming more commonplace.

Another manager told about how some were taking advantage of the situation and buying up the most sought after goods and attempting to pirate them on the internet. They were allegedly caught and stopped.

According to one internet report a bottle of hand sanitizer bought for $8 at a drug store sold the same day for $138 on a website.

And there are cases of downright rudeness.

“Some people act like it’s my own personal fault that we’re out of certain items,” another manager said.

[littlebitlizbit]

Tinker... Where do I begin? With his spirit, his sass? His grumble meow, or his cooing purr? The crook at the top of his long broken tail, or his blown out oracle eye? There are so many feelings and emotions that his name brings up, and I hope that I have the words to get them out right...

So right, where do I begin? I guess at the beginning.

About two and a half years ago my household lost one of our cats to old age. Our other cat, Rufus, was never a huge fan of his late sibling, but he was still used to anothers cat’s company. I wanted to bring him in a new friend, but knew that financially it would be a stretch. I have a rare genetic disorder that gets in the way of full time work, and vet bills, especially for older cats, tend to add up... but still, Ruffie needed a companion.

I started to look online at some of the various animal rescues around the lower mainland, and stumbled across Katie’s Place. It is a no kill cat rescue, that offers a unique option for those looking to adopt.

It’s called the Permanent Foster Program. This program exists to get the most in need cats into a household asap. It applies to the senior cat’s, in Kate’s Place care, that have non life threatening issues. The hardest part about adopting out older cats is people’s concerns over vet bills, and this is where Katie’s place differs from most shelters... They work with vets who continue to see the cats for the remainder of their lives, and Katie’s Place covers any fees or medication costs.

I started looking through their cats available for adoption gallery, and finding out which ones were available for the PM program. There were at least three that could have been a good fit, so a friend and I headed out on one of their open house days to meet the candidates.

I remember thinking how smart of a set up they had, to house the rescues in a comfortable way. You pass through a safety gate and into a comfortably lit portable, with rooms running down either side of the hall, each with an connected covered patio. Instantly we were greeted by the “hall cats.” We entered the first room, that comfortably housed about 6 rescues. One of the PF cats was sleeping in her bed, and she perked up as I put my arm near her bed. She was a beauty white fluffy girl, who was sweet, but wasn’t a fan of other cats, so not the best fit. As we popped in and out of the rooms, I had my eye out for one named Smigeon, a black fluffy guy who sounded chill on the website. He was in one of the rooms towards the back, on the porch, a volunteer informed me. On the way through to him, my eye was draw to this miserable looking cat, with very obvious sight issues. He was bald and covered in scabs, raising his paw cautiously in front of himself from on top of a cage within a cage. There was something about him... but not wanting to startle him, I let him be, and continued through the door to find Smigeon snoozing utop a cat tree. He instantly rolled over and gave me the sweetest look and started purring at my pets. I was sold, and went to tell the woman in charge that I would like to take him. As I was petting some cats nearby her and another volunteer, I overheard the volunteer tearfully say “I don’t want him to die in here.” I went over and asked what was up, and was told that Smigeon came in with another cat, but this other cat was super sick, and had a stomach tumour, and wasn’t expected to last more than two weeks. I called home and asked my partner if he trusted me, and he said yes. I told him we were getting two cats. Turns out the mostly blind scabby guy was Smigeon’s old house mate. I knew that I could give him so much love in the time he had left, and though it would hurt, resigned myself to this short term guy. I was told to really have a think about it overnight, and was there the moment they opened the next day with carriers ready to bring them home.

It was as if this scabby cat, this Tinker, knew we were coming for him. He was off of his smaller cage, and at the mouth of his big one with his paw outstretched towards me the moment I walked in. My friend helped cage up Smigeon while I got Tinker into his. Smige fell asleep in his cage on the way home, while Tinker, sat half in his cage, half on my lap, staring either at me or out the window. He could see a bit...but not much.

And then the boys were home.

Smigeon pranced around the house like he was the happiest prince. He LOVED water, like would let the tap drip on his head he loved it so much (even tried to jump into the bath with me once.) Rufus was wary of Smigeon, there were a couple hisses, but for the most part didn’t seem to mind him.

Tinker was another story... the poor guy walked into walls and chairs, but could see at least a little bit and had great hearing. Rufus was mesmerized by him. Like he could tell that something was wrong with this guy, so wasn’t aggressive in the least bit. If Tinker hissed, Ruffie would just quietly sniff near him, and give him space.

That first night, all the cats were on the bed. Tinker couldn’t jump up on his own, so I made him a set of makeshift stairs, that he ended up being really good with. He then marched, with all the grumpy sass of an old man, onto my chest, and promptly curled himself around my neck, falling almost instantly and deeply asleep. I knew then and there that this cat had my heart, in a way that I’d never experienced before.

Sure, I’ve had some great cats, amazing cats, sweet silly cats. One of my favourite cats growing up was exceptional, Taz. He was a rescue, a smushed faced himalayan persian, who would jump from the floor up to my stomach then from stomach to shoulder and perch there. He’d give me kisses and hugs, sat on my lap every meal and whenever I was on a couch. He slept at my feet and used to love to sit on my chest and just stare at me, purring. He was the cat that made me fall in love with grumpy old man cats... but he has long since passed and I didn’t think I’d ever get that lucky again.

I was wrong.

As the days went by, Tinker thrived. Him and Rufus seemed to be bonding exceptionally fast, and he would devour any food that was put in front of him. He loved fresh water, and would drink loudly while padding the floor, and then would put his paw right into his mug. Oh yes, he drank out of a Batman mug, he wouldn’t drink out of a bowl, but the mug was his jam.

Smigeon, our clean, other than being older, bill of health kitty, on the other hand, was not doing well. No matter what I’d put down for him food wise, he wouldn’t eat. Not even fresh cooked meat or bacon. I started to “baby bird” him and would fill a thick syringe up with moist food, and feed him that way. He ate a tiny bit of dry food one day, and he’d drink tons of water. After a week I brought him and Tinker in for a check up, since Tinker’s skin condition didn’t seem to be getting any better, and Smigeon was getting weaker. Turns out Tinker, and now my house, had ringworm. But poor Smidge, the vet wanted to keep overnight, to see if he’d improve after being on an IV. I was called the next day by the vet, Dr.Gold, who told me that they did some more tests on Smigeon, and it turned out that his entire body was riddled with tumours. He was weak and in pain and the vet said there was nothing they could do, and that we needed to let him go. I rushed out in time to hold him, give him lots of loves and pets, as he crossed the rainbow bridge in my arms. It was hard, and unexpected, but I’m thankful that he at least got to have a final couple of weeks in a loving home.

He and Smigeon did not come from a safe/loving home. Tinker had scarring that showed not only a once broken tail, but also ribs. Some of his teeth were broken, and he wasn’t born blind, but one of his eye was completely blown out. Both cats were surrendered after a raid, completely matted and dehydrated. It boils my blood to think that some people can be so cruel...

Back home, now Rufus had contracted ringworm, and both Tinker and him had to be quarantined in the spare room, while we disinfected the entire house. Tinker was on cold meds, as well as ringworm meds, and it took me a few times to figure out the best way to administer it. He would go full on feral if I tried to pinch his mouth open at all, but the liquid meds seemed to be the easiest, while I held him with my arms and legs. Both boys had to get bathed once every 2 to 3 days for about two months, and we had to completely disinfect their room a couple of times a day.

During this time I would go, in my massive Batman onesie, and just lay down with them. Rufus was never big on pets and cuddles, but everytime Tinker would march straight up my chest, and lay claim to the real estate around my neck. My guess is that my breath on him from there was comforting, like he knew he was safe... The two boys became inseparable in that time, and Ruffie actually started to want tactile love. Rufus had never liked to sleep near any other cats, but the two of then now cuddled almost constantly.

Finally, after getting the final check/ok from the vets, the boys quarantine was over. (Funny side story, during that visit Tiker needed to have bloodwork done... I could hear him yowling down the hall, and when they brought him back in the vet tech was wearing a fully padded suit, and plastic neck and face guard. She basically threw him at me...poor feral guy, but was calm the second he was back in my arms) Tinker was the first out of the room, slowly but surely relishing in his new freedom. Rufus was a little more cautious upon exiting the room, but cautious is kind of his default.

Slowly but surely more of Tinker’s personality started to come out, as he blossomed. We’d now had him for about three months, and he was showing no signs of slowing down...in fact quite the opposite. After watching him one morning accurately swat at and chase a fly, I realized how good his hearing was. The pet store near me sold these crinkle balls, that made the slightest noise while being batted around. As soon as I dropped it for him, a new Tinker was unleashed. He chased and batted around that thing with the energy and accuracy of a kitten. I couldn’t believe it. Neither could the vet. On his next check up they were pleased at his weight gain, and the fact that his fur was starting to grow back in (the exact same shade as Rufus, who knew!?). His tumour wasn’t growing, but it also wasn’t shrinking, so he was put on some pain meds to make him a little more comfortable. He became even more active after that. It’s funny, he would sing, literally sing and coo to his crinkle ball wherever he would catch it and carry it around in his mouth all proud like. If he’d lose it under some furniture, we’d have to go on our hands and knees around the house to see what he lost it under, because he would cry if he couldn’t find it. Finally I bought him a pack of 12 online, so that if he lost it, we could just pop him out another. Well that didn’t work out.... turns out this one crinkle ball in particular was his baby, and no matter what, we couldn’t trick him into a different one.

As winter started to melt into spring, and we started to let Tinker out into the front yard. It’s completely fenced in, and I'd sit with him while he explored, sniffing everything he could, with a lust for life.

When I was home (Which was most of the time) he would be my constant shadow. I sew, as well as make jewelry, and whenever, wherever I had a project on the go, Tinker would be right there beside me. I ended up getting him these vintage stools covered in padded fabric, and he would snooze lazily on them beside me as I worked away, occasionally waking up for some fresh water and head pets. Him and Rufus were still super close, cuddling for hours every day, an absolute first for Ruffie. He adopted a small Batman stuffy of mine, and started cuddling with it daily. The days that I had to go to work, he would give me sass all morning (if I put on makeup that seemed to be the give away that I was going out) and then come trotting to the door, as fast as he could, upon arriving back home. He did this hilarious thing when he was upset with me for going out... he’d crawl onto the bed and start biting the blanket. The first time he did it I thought he was stuck or something, but then I tried to pull the blanket away, and he grumble meowed. He would do it anytime I had to go out of town (The longest I was ever away was three nights) and usually when I’d come home from work. It turned out to be like a game of tug of war for him.

Before I knew it, a whole year had gone by with this little miracle. I was falling more and more in love with him as time went on, all the while painfully aware that every moment with him was a gift. He started to get a bit more grumbly, and eventually started developing mouth ulcers, apparently something common in cats with stomach cancer. During a check up the vet said it might be time to let him go, but he was still super active. Still eating and drinking a ton, still purred when getting love, and still played actively with his crinkle ball. We decided to treat the ulcers as best we could, and upped his CBD dose. The vet said that if the ulcers didn’t shrink with this treatment, that it might be time to let him go. I knew his lust for life, but alo didn’t want him to suffer. I remember getting him home, and telling him that I would fight for his life as long as he did. I know that cats can’t understand our language, but I feel like some of them are really excellent at picking up intent. He would always look me square in the eye, with whatever vision he had left, and seemed to be intently listening. He would talk back often too, it was pretty incredible.

That week he upped his active factor... Played more than usual, wanted to go outside more, cuddled a ton, and was just an overall super happy to be alive cat. I sent the vet videos of him from that week, and she couldn’t believe it. She agreed that this was a cat who still had living to do, so ulcer meds got added to the pain med list, and he kept on going.

I started working from home, and that really pleased Tinker, though he became even more bonded to me than I thought possible. It got to the point where I'd open the bathroom door, and there he’d be, sitting like a patient dog, waiting to crawl back into my lap. He took his meds like a champ, and just like that, we were passing the two year mark of bringing him home.

Things with him were mostly great, but he was starting to slow down little by little.

He started to pee on the floor once in awhile, around the litter box, rather than in it. He prefered to do his business outside, but if someone wasn’t around to take him out, he would let his displeasure be known this way. He started coming and asking for his pain meds at the exact time he was supposed to get them, if not a little earlier. He was getting slower and slower, and I knew that the time was near. I started to build up this steel wall of protection around my heart, because everytime I thought of life without him, I’d feel this overwhelming sense of loss, and couldn’t stop from crying uncontrollably. We took things a day at a time, and things were mostly normal, other than him getting a little slower. A couple of days after my birthday he was playing with his crinkle ball. The next day he didn’t eat much, but still drank a ton and went outside. The next day he didn’t eat anything, but still drank and went outside, albeit slowly. Three days after playing with his crinkle ball he had trouble standing. I looked him in the eyes and could see that my little miracle, the grumpy old man of my life, the cat love of my life, was done. I called the vet, and found out that our favourite Doctor was just getting home from Japan that night. The receptionist booked him in to be put to sleep the next day and I hoped, selfishly, that our she could make it in.

I was with him 24/7 that final week, and spent the last 48 hours on the floor with him. The morning of his appointment i brought him onto my chest, one final time onto the bed. He fell fast asleep, and I got to just feel his warmth and breath for about 4 hours. Finally, but way too soon, it was time. My friend picked me up, and we drove him out, as we had for multiple check ups, him wrapped in a towel on my lap. The wall of protection around my heart was suffering terrible fissures, but I knew that I had to be strong for him. I did my best not to cry or allow my energy to get upset, so as not to upset him. Thankfully Dr.Gold, our favourite vet, was able to make it in. She set aside a room fo us for an hour, dimmed the lights, and had a beautiful hand knit blanket for him. Remembering what he was like that last time he got poked with a needle, I asked them if I could go in the back with him to have the IV put in, and they were kind enough to just do it all right in the room. He didn’t even squawk when they administered it, which just solidified for us how done he was. We were offered more time with him, but I knew he was done, and every moment with him now was a selfish one. He closed his eyes for pets, then looked at me one final time, as the rainbow bridge opened in front of him.

Afterwards I felt strangely numb, but also calm. I did what I had set out to do, two years previous, and was given so much more than I ever could have hoped for. As I’m typing this I’m crying, and have had to take multiple breaks. Knowing that such a special relationship is over, in these forms, has been harder than I’d care to admit. Being prepared to lose him from the get go hasn’t made grieving any easier. Greif is such a funny thing, that comes for you when you’re least expecting it. I’m bursting into tears much more than I’m comfortable with, but I know things will get easier with time. I’ll never stop missing him, but will always be forever grateful for every single bonus day we had together.

Rufus is doing ok now, though he is grieving too. His tail had a droop to it, and was yeowling the nights away... So I did what I did the last time he lost a sibling... He now has a new PF brother, Clue. I may not have much money, or energy, but I saw first hand the difference love and affection can have on a life. Clue is an all black fluffy guy, just like Smigeon was, and has asthma. He’s drooly and sweet, and him and Rufus have already started sleeping on the couch together. There is no way that Tinker could ever be replaced. That’s a hole in my soul that I don’t think will ever fully heal...but knowing that I’m making a difference in another life helps.

There are so many animals in need of loving homes, and not enough homes to house them. If you can, please consider adopting from our local shelter or animal rescue. I get the impulse for wanting a certain breed, but going to a breeder or a pet store is unnecessary. Just as many pure breeds cycle through rescues as not, so if you’re patient you can become the furrever home to the pet of your dreams, for a fraction of the price, and every fee paid to a rescue ensures that they can continue to help more animals.

My time with Tinker taught me to really appreciate life, and see things to be thankful for with crystal like clarity. He’s taught me compassion and patience on a new level, and gave me a lifetime's worth of cat love memories.

Think of all that your next rescue could teach you, and start looking. Nothing would make me happier than if this story can inspire you to open your heart, and home. It can be hard, it can be painful, but I promise you, it’s worth it.

Please consider donating to Katie’s Place if you have the means. Or your own local animal rescue.

http://katiesplaceshelter.com/

Thank you.

Love always,

Elizabeth xoxo

[android-for-life]

"Wi-Fi woes got you down? Google Nest is here to help"

As the product lead for connectivity at Google Nest, I’m a complete Wi-Fi geek. I love helping people solve their home Wi-Fi problems and get the most out of their routers -- and that includes my own family. I have two teenage sons attending high school remotely, while I’m currently working from my dining table. Suffice it to say I’m a fan of anything that gives my home Wi-Fi a boost.

Luckily, we’re rolling out a software update to make both Nest Wifi and Google Wifi work even more smoothly today. This update will improve overall network performance on slow internet connections, which means your Wi-Fi will better support multiple video calls, gaming sessions and more simultaneously. It includes general security and stability improvements and will also improve device connection speeds on wireless networks and optimizations so your devices move to faster Wi-Fi radio channels. Our priority device feature is also getting smarter, so you can rest assured Wi-Fi traffic will be prioritized to the device you choose. This means you can make sure your work laptop is getting the strongest Wi-Fi available, as opposed to the kids’ YouTube sessions. And the best part is these updates will be pushed automatically, no action required on your end. 

Of course, no Wi-Fi is infallible, and I know how frustrating it can be when it isn’t working the way you expect. No matter what router you’re using, here are a few tips to help you troubleshoot: 

If your TV is always buffering:

Remove  barriers: If you’re still using an old black box router, don’t hide it in drawers or behind furniture – this compromises its usefulness and weakens your Wi-Fi signal. Metal (like a filing cabinet) and water (like an aquarium) are the biggest offenders.

Reboot your router: Most people are familiar with this tip, but don’t actually know why they’re doing it. If you’re noticing network congestion, rebooting  cleans up stale software buffers and forces the reconnection of your devices. 

Run a speed test: Is your problem your Wi-Fi range? Get close to your router and run a speed test, then try again from farther away. If it’s slower the second time, you may have a dead zone. If you can, try moving your router out into the open or closer to the potential dead zone to see if that helps. You can find a free speed test at speedtest.net. 

If the whole family is online at once:

Know how much speed you need: Most video calls require 5 Mbps of consistent speed, but the reality is a bit more nuanced.  Because you’re receiving video from the internet (download) and sending video as well (upload), you’ll want to make sure that your upload speed is a good, consistent 5 Mbps as well. Conduct a speed test during a busy time of day when you’ve had a bad video call. If you have less than 5 Mbps DL (downlink) or UL (uplink), you might consider placing a...

...Call to your Internet Service Provider: If it feels like your Wi-Fi gets bogged down during the work day, but otherwise works fine, your issue could be your ISP.  If you’ve already run a speed test and spent time rebooting your router and modem, it may be time to work with your ISP to solve the problem. If your ISP modem is really old, it might be time for an upgrade.  Buying one yourself rather than getting it from your ISP might save you up to $10 a month. Check your ISP’s website for compatible modems before you purchase one, then call your ISP to get it added to their network.

If your home has dead zones:

Upgrade your router: Especially if it’s more than five years old There were substantial changes in Wi-Fi standards in the U.S. back in 2015, allowing higher radio power and therefore better coverage from routers made in 2016 or later. 

Consider a mesh network: A mesh network is a group of routers (actually Wi-Fi access points) that wirelessly communicate with each other to create a single, connected Wi-Fi network over a large area. We created Nest Wifi as a mesh system because having multiple points work together to create a seamless, single network. While network strength varies depending on things like the size of your house and your ISP, the idea is that this system provides consistently strong coverage for all connected devices throughout your home. 

We all rely on Wi-Fi, and when it doesn’t work, it’s a source of frustration untold.  Hopefully these tips help keep you connected, whether you’re working, streaming, gaming or binge-watching.

Source : The Official Google Blog via Source information

#jeprog

[rinnnyxr]

Pet Peeves commercials slow internet talking during a movie people that eat of off your plate line cutters pop out YouTube ads people who talk over you wobbly tables auto-correct scratching on a chalk board movie spoilers copycats no wifi jealous friends left on seen being ignored fake friends chewing people who sing out loud people spitting while they talk slow walkers hearing people pop their knuckles people that smoke

Quarantine | bold everything that you have done while being bored baked a new recipe tried your hand at art had a group face time call slept past 3 pm gardened went on a run finished a show in a week cleaned your room almost broke out of social isolation scrolled through your camera roll ran out of snacks started doing a new workout routine wore nothing but pj’s called the same person 3 times in a day spent too much money online shopping learned tiktok dances got paranoid about a cough or sneeze had a screen time above 8 hours slept into the afternoon wrote a song or poem cut your hair

In 2020 so far got into a relationship won an award got a new phone made a new friend got out of a toxic relationship removed toxic friends turned a year older passed drivers test gave birth welcomed a new family member moved houses moved to a different place traveled to another country made happy memories got into a sports team

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I’m an Aries I like popular things I often like stuff that people never heard of I’m lowkey a perfectionist I try to make others happy even when I’m hurting I’m a Taurus I prefer quiet and chill places I have ambition I know a lot of good music and tv shows I’m a Gemini I joke a lot as a coping mechanism I know everything about everyone but I always stay quiet I have a million ideas and things I want to do I’m a Cancer I have a lot of fictional ships I try to see everyone’s point of view I have logical intelligence I have emotional intelligence I’m a Leo People told me before that I give interesting replies when texting I’m hard to get to know I try my best I’m a Virgo I pretend I don’t care but I always care a lot I’m indecisive I’m determined I notice a LOT of things about a person just at first glance I’m a Libra I act clueless but I’m actually extremely smart I thrive on validation from the people I love I’m able to make anything pretty or fun I’m a Scorpio I contemplate the meaning of life often I’m super sensitive to my surrounding I relate to villains in media often I’m a Sagittarius I prefer creative over logical subjects I can talk about almost anything I put up with a lot but once I’m angered I go off hard I’m a Capricorn I use my passions to express my feelings I’m self-conscious I’m also self-assured at the same time I crave comfort and security I’m an Aquarius I’m skeptical I have weird beliefs I always check up on my friends I value intelligence and personality over appearance I’m a Pisces I spend too much time online I have super weird dreams I can sense fakeness and I strongly dislike it

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I’m smart I always know the latest news I always talk to my friends I’m tech-savvy I’m a perfectionist I love memes I stay up all night I want everyone to just chill I’m humorous I’m moody af I’m always bored I’m not bothered by the quarantine I re-watch series out of boredom I’m full of energy I’m annoying I love sugar I spam about my quarantine on social media I have a tiktok account I enjoy rainy weather I never work out I procrastinate a lot I’m really antisocial My hands are soft I want love and attention I’m chilling right now I’m innocent I don’t like watching the news I know someone named Sarah I know someone named Grace I know someone named Cody I know someone named Claire I know someone named Chloe I know someone named Joseph I know someone named Caden I know someone named Isaac I know someone named Bryan I know someone named Faith I know someone named Shannon I know someone named Anne I know someone named Ethan I know someone named Ashley I know someone named John I know someone named Russel I know someone named Megan I know someone named James

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I have pet turtles. I want a puppy. I’m listening to music. I think Justin Timberlake is weird… I wish I had ice-cream. I would like to see Madonna live. I use to be a Myspace whore. I hate Facebook. I live in an apartment. I’m letting my hair grow. I think everyone should have long hair. ^ even guys. I don’t have hardwood floors in my house. The fire alarm went off this week. I’m wearing sweatpants. I’m wearing a ring. I don’t own an iPod. I have an iPhone. ^ It’s pink! Nicki Minaj use to be better than she is now. I love Ariana Grande. I have a Twitter. I have a website. I’ve been called a hippie. My mom is my best friend. My dad and I are getting closer…. My parents are getting separated. I never been on a plane. I live with someone. ^ my boyfriend. I’ve been in a relationship for longer than a year. Going on 6 years to be exact. My parents keep asking me when I’ll get married. I don’t think I’ll have kids, ever. I’m a college student. I got a new job this year. I had pasta today. I had pizza today. I didn’t eat breakfast. Flo from the Progressive commercials doesn’t annoy me. I hate that commercial with the sad puppies on it… ^ I’ve been emotional and cried while it’s on…. I have 1 sister. I’ve had blonde hair. I’ve had highlighted hair. I’ve had red hair. I’ve had teal hair. I’m trying to get my natural hair color back.. My natural hair color is brown…. Eyebrows are VERY important. I haven’t got my haircut in like a year…. I have trust issues. Bolding surveys relax me. I own a survey taking blog. I want Chinese food. I wish I was Asian. I’m white.. I have brown eyes. I’m pale. ^ I like being pale. I have a blanket on. I currently getting over a cold. I can’t stand rude people. I live in a big city. I grew up in a small town. I like Amanda Bynes before & after she went crazy. I also love Lindsay Lohan. I love Lindsay Lohan - Rumors. I’m allergic to cats. I wanna go to zoo! I watched The Hunger Games movie this week. I don’t apologize unless I feel I need too. I hold grudges. I’m not very optimistic. “I made it through the wilderness…” ^ I know what song this is from. I wish I could live a day in opposite sex. Freaky Friday was a great movie. Titanic is one of my favorite movies. I always wanted my own heart of the ocean necklace. I have a Pandora bracelet. ^ I never wear it……. My favorite color is yellow. I hate red roses. I love avocados. Salads are great! People tell me I should be a model. ^ I think they are crazy. I use to have big dreams… ^ until reality kicked in. I don’t own anything Chanel. The Illuminati is real. ^ & they are watching us. Pickles are great! I hate pancakes. I hate half my family. I have bitches for aunts. I like to meditate. I sometimes feel like the Matrix is real… I still don’t understand how the world was created… I’m not very religious. ^ but I believe in Heaven. I wish I was an x-men. This survey is soo random. My favorite number is 3. I was born in March. I’ve never taken Molly. Mileys Cyrus is cool. I think Britney Spears seems sweet. Beyonce seems like a bitch… ^ so does Katy Perry. …..ugh Lady Gaga….. It’s raining right now. It’s night time right now. I don’t have to work tomorrow. I have no plans for tomorrow. I need to do laundry. I’m in-love. I don’t have any tattoos. I’ve never been to the gym. I smile at strangers. I have a lot of empty water bottles in my room.. I’ve probably going to take another survey. I’m wearing socks. My nails aren’t painted. It’s hot in my house right now. I love the band The Pretty Reckless. ^ I’ve met them! I kinda wanna cut my hair short. ^ but I know I will hate it a week later. I never been to a rave. I could be on Bad Girls Club. ^ because, I have a temper. I wannabe skinnier. I’m happy over all.