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#they can do so much better i hate it here
waldau · 3 days
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how they take care of you — seventeen | 2,531 words | hurt/comfort, fluff
i didn't know i liked writing ot13 this much!
gender neutral reader. warnings: reader is stressed out/tired/scared/ill/sad? y'know, the usual spectrum of negative human emotions?
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seungcheol
gets so concerned when he hears a hitch in your voice when you greet him that he drops whatever he’s doing and rushes to you. doesn’t matter if he’s on a call or if he’s doing some important paperwork, he’s all yours now.
gives you a big, comforting hug that tries to shield you from everything but him. kisses your head to try and ground you.
doesn’t make you talk if you don’t want to, but he insists that you don’t keep it in for too long because it’s only going to hurt you in the end. lasts only for a while before asking if there's someone that needs some talking to for making you feel this sad.
tries to do anything in his power to see you smile, even if it's momentary. shows you a funny picture of his favourite child (mingyu) to cheer you up. asks if you feel okay enough to walk kkuma with him, because she needs some time with her other favourite person (you).
“you know i love you, right? that's never changing.”
jeonghan
is proud to be the person that becomes your comfort when something doesn’t go right, or when you’ve had a bad day.
immediately bottles up any jokes he’s about to make and wipes away your tears, stops only when you bat his hands away. even if he doesn’t want to let go of you, he respects your boundaries.
when you're feeling a bit better, he pulls you down into the sofa and cuddles with you, and is content whether you choose to tell him what’s on your mind, or if you want to be silent and fiddle with his shirt instead.
kisses your forehead and looks into your eyes when he promises you that it’s just one bad day, and that he’s always here for all the others. links pinkies with you because he knows how much it means to you, even if it may seem childish.
will resort to tickling you to make the last traces of your sadness vanish, and asks if there’s anything else he can do to make you smile.
joshua
comes to pick you up from work because he has a free day, and realizes something’s wrong the moment you greet him hello without even looking at his face for more than two seconds.
doesn’t make a big deal out of it, though. takes your stuff from you and greets you softly. opens the door for you and buckles your seat belt. asks you if it’s okay that he’s not taking you home first, because there’s some place else he wants to take you.
dismisses any concerns you have about not looking “good enough” to go out, because you look absolutely gorgeous at any time of the day, and he’d never lie about something like this to you. lets you choose whatever music you want as he weaves through the traffic on the streets, telling you about his day.
parks the car and gets out to hold your hand in his as he guides you over to the many stalls, asking you to pick whatever you want to eat. sits next to you on one of the benches overlooking the river, your legs swinging as you lean into his side and enjoy your meal. is glad he could take care of you like this because you needed it.
“trust me when i say whatever happened is not your fault, okay, sweetheart?”
junhui
is more confident in his actions than his words, because he can immediately notice the little changes in your behaviour: your tired smile, and the way you’re kind of curled in on yourself, as if trying to take up less space.
gives you a long hug with lots of cheek kisses and pulls you into the kitchen to show you what he’s working on: a dish that coincidentally happens to be your comfort food. it’s your favourite, especially when jun makes it in his own style.
this six foot man becomes small as he tries to do anything to make you smile. hates that you’re even feeling this way. throws random pickup lines at you to see which one gets you to crack and slap his arm and tell him to stop (he won’t, because he loves you too much).
offers to feed you dinner once it’s ready and makes random airplane noises that bring out a giggle from you. watches as you eat slowly and is glad when he sees your bowl is empty. doesn’t resist your offer of feeding him dinner once you’re done.
hides under the blankets with you and watches cat videos till your eyes shut from exhaustion and his arm hurts from holding up the phone from so long. cuddles with you and doesn’t let go even when you halfheartedly complain about how warm it is.
soonyoung
becomes so gentle that it pulls you out of your dullness a bit, makes you wonder where your usually hyperactive boyfriend is.
doesn’t baby you because he knows you don’t like it, but he makes sure you get everything you need. calls his mother to ask her the exact recipe for this soup she used to feed him when he used to get ill. stays by your side even when you have a raging fever and you’re worried he’s going to catch it if he kisses your cheek one more time.
doesn’t complain even once when you wake him up because of how uncomfortable you’re feeling. what else is he there for, if he can’t take care of the person he loves the most? wraps himself along with you in your blanket even if it’s hot enough that he can just melt.
is your hype man when you finally get better enough to start moving around the house by yourself. watches you with the biggest smile on his face that he will not tamp down when he sees you eating the soup he made, and almost cries with joy when you ask him for a second serving.
doesn’t blame you one bit when he catches the same bug a week later, because you’re there to take care of him through it, and because he loves you too much for it to be an issue.
wonwoo
gently pulls you into his chest the moment he sees your tear-streaked cheeks, and rests his head on yours. doesn’t ask you what’s wrong because he feels it’s more important to make you feel better.
doesn’t care that your tears are leaving behind a spot on his shirt, and shushes you for even pointing it out. in fact he wants you to do that so that you can run out of tears and he can take care of you properly.
gives you his hoodie to wear because it’s oversized on you, and he loves seeing you in it just as much as you love wearing it.
makes you wrap your arms around his waist from behind and cling onto him while he goes about the house finishing his share of chores. does yours without asking if he senses you’re too drained out to do them.
absolutely needs you by his side regardless of what he’s doing, whether it’s playing a game or brushing his teeth. offers to read you a book if you’re having trouble falling asleep. tells you he loves you in the lowest voice possible when he sees you finally asleep against his chest, breathing evened out.
jihoon
might not very verbal, but when it comes to you, he knows exactly what to do to make things better.
knows you’re in his studio when the door shuts, but you don’t greet him. decides to finish some edits on the song he’s working on before he turns to you, only to find you lying on the sofa facing away from him.
genuinely sad to hear you had a bad day. he got through today only because of all the encouraging texts you sent him. decides the least he can do is return the favour.
wraps you in your favourite blanket that he always keeps at the studio for when you visit. holds your hand regardless of whether you want to talk or not. offers to order food to the studio so that he can make sure you’re not hungry.
very thankful that you came to him because you were feeling down, and he very much wants to call it a day and take you home so that he can cuddle with you and make your day just a bit better.
seokmin
his mood almost always mirrors yours, so when he sees you so exhausted and down, his heart genuinely hurts.
not a confrontational person, but he’s willing to fight whatever made you sad, even if it was a table you stubbed your toe on. happy that it brings a smile to your face even if he didn’t actually fight anything.
have you seen his arms? wraps them around you till you push him off with a bit of a smile on your face. he then decides he wants to use them to bake something for you. you’re the better baker between the two of you and since he’s got loads of time today, he decides he wants to learn something that he can make the next time you’re away and he doesn’t have to feel that lonely.
is your own personal jukebox. belts out whatever song you want, and does a mini infinite aju nice in the comfort of your kitchen, making you jump while the oven works, till you’re tired and actually smiling.
“it’ll be okay, i promise. i love you.”
mingyu
hates that you had a nightmare but is thankful that he was sleeping right next to you when it happened.
the biggest cuddle bug you’ll ever see you in your life. when you wake him up with a shaky voice, he immediately blinks out of his sleep and holds you in his arms. he’ll hug you and keep hugging you till he can drain your sadness even just a little.
doesn’t matter how late it is; if you can’t go back to sleep, he’ll pull you to the kitchen and make his ramen just for you. makes you help him chop some ingredients and stir the broth so that you feel involved. keeps purposely bumping into you every time you cross paths and takes a kiss as payment.
finds some cheesy, slow music to dance to and gently pulls you all over the kitchen, twirling you and even bending you as the song ends. loves hearing your laugh when he pulls you back up.
“i hope you dream of me when you sleep again. i love you.”
minghao
words aren’t necessary when he can just take care of you the way you always deserve to be taken care of.
actually gets upset (a little) when you apologize for crying in front of him. who else will make you feel better when you’re down if not for him? makes you promise never to feel nervous to be emotional around him.
runs a bath for you and makes your favourite food. when you’re done with dinner and feeling a bit better, he takes you to bed and cuddles with you, wanting you to focus on his breathing so you can calm yourself. he whispers endearments into your ear. also makes sure you know how proud he is of you for getting through today.
would give you the entire world if he could, but when you tell him the only thing you want is him, he promises you he’s never going anywhere, no matter what happens.
“i’m so lucky to call myself yours, my love. always.”
seungkwan
he can never stand seeing his loved ones sad, so when he sees you, he needs to find a way to make your smile get back to your face.
sees your lips wobble when you say hello to him, and he eventually coaxes the issue out of you: your friends had ditched a get-together you’d been planning at the last minute, and they didn’t even have the decency to apologize for it. he feels extremely angry on your behalf and is ready to curse. doesn’t do it only because it won’t help you.
thinks about what he can do to make you happy. asks if he can take you out on a drive tonight so you can watch the stars with him. when you regretfully decline the offer, he asks if you want to create a blanket fort and watch movies or go to sleep.
it’s not long before he’s constructing a blanket fort for the first time in his life thanks to some youtube tutorials. he’s upset when it collapses right in the middle of constructing it, but he realizes he’d build it a hundred times more if it meant you’d laugh the way you just did.
sets up snacks and your favourite drinks after a while. keeps apologizing to you on behalf of your so-called friends till you tell him to stop. promises that he’s always going to be with you, and that you don’t have to be sad when you’re with him. falls asleep with you in his arms, and a smile on your face, snacks and movies forgotten.
hansol
feels bad the moment he sees you try to mask the sadness on your face with a smile.
better with actions than words, so he kisses your forehead and trails you around the house while you try to relax from the day you had. if you’re really sad, he lets you just rest your head against his collarbone and breathe till you feel better.
“you’ve got this, and you’ve got me, okay? i’m right here.”
has a bunch of handmade coupons for whenever you feel sad. each coupon has the same four options: eat, talk, watch a movie, sleep. does whatever you choose, whether it’s only one or all four.
another one who has no problem with prolonged eye contact. he looks at you till you understand that he loves you more than he can say and that he’s always there for you when you feel like this.
chan
always used to being babied by his older brothers, so he feels happy to get a chance to take care of you. just doesn’t like the fact that you’re sad, because you deserve to be anything but.
very transparent with his affection for you. he whispers “i love you” into your hair when you ask him for a hug, shouts it across the living room when you come out to get some water, and holds your hand under the table during dinner even if it’s inconvenient.
if you’re really down, and don’t feel like talking, he bundles you into a blanket and puts you on the sofa and sits close to you, so that you have your space but he’s close enough if you need him.
sits with you while you work and watches intently even if he doesn’t understand much of what you’re doing. ready to go to the store and get you anything you’re craving, regardless of how late it is.
“i love looking after you, okay? don’t ever feel bad about telling me what’s troubling you.”
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taglist: @bookyeom @wootify @strnsvt @cloudycaramel @thepoopdokyeomtouched
@minnieminshi @nonononranghaee @hrts4hanniehae @viewvuu @bewoyewo
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cosmicpearlz · 3 days
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my love is mine, all mine
summary: a glimpse into how wonderful your relationship with jude is and how you guys complete each other.
pairing: jude bellingham x reader
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~one~
“i’m jude bellingham,” you attempt to mock his deep voice, while trying to contain your laugh. jude playfully glares at you with his arms crossed against his chest.
“you’re not funny.”
“i am so. you know you wanna laugh,” you replied, smiling brightly in his face. it instantly makes him crack a soft smile but he didn’t want to give you the satisfaction of winning.
“no.”
“guys, he’s smiling! he knows i’m funny,” you poked his side while smiling even harder. the camera crew around you guys laugh at the way the two of you got distracted with poking each other and slapping the other person’s hand away.
“you guys have to stay on task. start asking the questions!”
“right right, sorry. i’m jude and that’s y/n,” you waved to the camera as jude introduced you.
“we’re here to see who loves the other person more.”
“no. try again.”
“we’re actually here to basically talk about our relationship. is that better?” jude looks at you with a smile and shakes his head.
“whatever you say m’love. do you wanna ask the first question?”
~two~
wining the match by a landslide had taken so much stress off of jude. he played the hardest he’s ever played. the fans from the opposite team giving him and his teammates an obnoxious amount of hate, only encouraged him harder. alas, he can breathe and loosen his shoulders.
jude looks across the pitch to find you with his family. his brother was the first to notice him looking and smiled at him. jude waves him over and jobe gets the hint, tapping everyone else to follow him across the pitch.
meeting in the middle, jude hugs jobe first. pulling him into a bear hug, causing the younger boy to laugh. moving on, he goes to hug his mom and dad. you stand over to the side giving them a little bit of privacy. you’ve never been the one to get in the way of his family, knowing how close they all were. not that they would’ve minded because they fully expected you and jude to get married, with how long you guys had been together. they seen you as a part of them.
“baby, why are you standing so far? c’mere,” jude pulls away from his mom and dad, immediately looking for you. he holds his arms out, prompting you to rush into his arms.
“congratulations my love. i’m so proud of you,” you whispered into his chest. jude wraps his arms tighter around you and lifts you up, loosen one arm to hook your legs around his waist. your arms find their place around his neck comfortably.
“thank you for being here.”
“i’d travel across the moon for you.”
“i’ll travel across the galaxy for you,” jude replies, while looking deeply into your eyes. you smiled and raised a hand to rest on his cheek. he leans his head further into your touch.
“must you always have to one up me?”
“yes. i would give you the world if i could.”
“luckily for you, you are my world and you’re already all mine,” your eyes gazing from his eyes to his lips. with one arm around your back and the other around one of your thighs that rested on his waist, he smirks.
“and you’re all mine,” jude leans his head closer to you, connecting your lips together. a sweet kiss that never fails to spark a burning desire within you. you pull away before the kiss can get too graphic with you guys still being in a public place.
“i love you so much.”
“i love you too darling,” jude places a quick kiss to your head and hugs your body close to him.
completely forgetting he absolutely still had the mic attached to his jersey. the private moment will be a trending topic for the next morning for sure.
~three~
“i’m ready to shake my ass on this yacht!” you jokingly said, causing jobe to make a face of disgust.
“ew i prefer you didn’t. don’t wanna see what you nasties do on your free time.”
“i prefer you do. actually, can i have a private dance?” everyone around jude groaned and walked away quickly to get on the boat. leaving the two of you to walk by yourselves.
“keep it in your pants bellingham,” you push his chest with a knowing smirk.
“i can’t. it literally has a mind of its own when it comes to you,” it was your turn to make a face mixed with disgust and disappointment.
“you are a perv. stop being nasty,” you pointed at him and walked away from him.
jude starts chasing you, knowing you wouldn’t even have the chance to go far because of his longer legs. he caught you in no time and picks you up, making you yelp in the process, along with nonstop laughter.
“you know you like my nastiness. stop pretending you don’t,” he whispered in your ear and placed a kiss on your neck.
“i do. just maybe not in front of your brother and friends,” you replied with, in between your constant giggles.
~four~
football season was finally over. real madrid winning the final cup had been a dream of jude’s and it came true. you guys took a trip back to england to visit his family and spend time with them. unfortunately, the time zone was messing with your sleep. finding yourself restless, you looked to your boyfriend and gaze over his sleeping figure.
“jude,” you poked his shoulder with a whisper. the sleeping boy didn’t move an inch.
“babe,” you shook his shoulder a little harder and jude hummed softly to you in acknowledgment. still he wasn’t fully awake.
“i can’t sleep.”
“darling it’s like three in the morning,” the roughness of his sleep voice stirred up something within you. curse your boyfriend for being so hot even when he’s half asleep.
“i know, i’m sorry. i just can’t sleep.”
jude sits up and rubs at his sleepy eyes. the moon light from the window shining on his face within the dark room.
“what do you want me to do exactly?”
“stay up with me until i fall asleep?”
the silence was loud as you guys studied each other’s faces in the dark. jude sends a small smile to you and gets fully out of bed. he holds his hand out for you to take and leads you to the kitchen. quiet footsteps pattering around the wood floors.
“let’s have some tea then.”
“okay.”
you sit on the stool by the countertop as you watched jude prepare two cups of tea. he knew exactly how you liked your tea. nothing in it but the tea bag and hot water. he thought it was weird but never mentioned it to you.
“here you go m’love,” sliding the hot tea cup to you and placing himself in the seat next to yours.
“thank you baby. i’m sorry i woke you.”
“it’s not a problem. is anything else wrong or you just really couldn’t sleep?”
“no, i just couldn’t sleep,” you pout, making the boy quietly laugh. he lifts one of your legs into his lap, rubbing the bare skin with his free hand before taking a sip of his own tea.
“well luckily i’m really good boyfriend.”
“oh really?”
“mmhm. who else would wake up at the ass crack of dawn?”
“you have a point bellingham,” you sip your tea to hide your incoming smile. “have i ever told you i love you?”
“hmm, you might have mentioned it once or twice.”
“once or twice? woah, you gotta give me more credit babe.”
“where’s the fun in that sweetheart?” you give him a dead straight look, while jude quietly laughs some more.
“i’m kidding. i love you more,” jude leans over and captures your lips in a kiss. moving to then place kisses all over your face, laughter now spreading out in you.
“not possible. i love you wayyy more.”
“ugh as if.”
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Commonly asked questions
How do I submit songs? Submissions are currently closed. When it opens up again, I'll post a message here stating rules and which specific info I require. If you don't supply that info along with the song, your message will be deleted.
I submitted a song when we were allowed. When will it appear? :) There's waaay over two thousand songs in my askbox. 😅 And I'm very slow at posting submitted songs because it takes an oddly more amount of time and energy than you'd think, that's why it's easier for me to go with the songs I already have. Please have a bit more patience, hopefully it'll be posted soon enough! 💖
I don't like the genres posted recently. 🤷‍♀️ I mean, you can tell me what genres there's a lack of and I'll try put more effort into adding more of them.
I don't like the poll options. 🤷‍♀️
Will there be an "Indifferent" option? No. People bitched and very rudely demanded it when the blog was new and it left a very sour taste. Also we're 250+ songs in, it's kinda meh to add it now, but I definitely understand why you want it because some songs are really hard to define if you feel anything at all about them. (also you know people would just click indifferent to see the results instead of listening to the song lol) If I were to ever add more options, it would be love/hate.
How do I vote on a song if I feel indifferent about it? Indifferent = don't like it ig. 🤷‍♀️ Remember, I'm not asking you if you LOVE!!!!!! the song, or if you want to buy it. Liking can be as good as only a "meh, it's ok / decent enough to run in the background". Disliking can be being indifferent instead of outright hating it, when it's so neutral to you that it doesn't give you any positive feelings. It is only a minute long clip that I'm asking you to form an opinion about after all; you can change your mind either way when you hear the full version. Sometimes songs have to grow on you!
How do you pick the songs used in the polls? Mostly like this:
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I have a huge mp3 hoarding archive so the submitted songs are easier for me to pick if they're already in my possession. 😅 Songs that aren't in my collection (tagged as #new to admin :D lol. sometimes i search out songs specifically for the poll that are tagged this as well) requires a bit more effort to download/listen to/edit but i have discovered a couple of great new gems so don't think i don't appreciate them!
How do I search for a specific artist/song that you've posted? All artists are tagged a day or so after the song reveal. Don't forget to use the hashtag symbol when searching or tumblr will give you all sorts of odd results!!!! (or none at all, lol) Please also remember that tumblr finds simple easy tasks extremely difficult, so only search for an artist with the easiest type of spelling, like #beyonce instead of #beyoncé. All artists and songs are added to the Complete Song List once their showdown poll is finished, for a quick search of what's been posted.
The audio quality is too poor for my taste!! 😡 sad </3
This is just for you. 💖
Why are all the songs of such vast variating quality? ....i mean, you didn't think I've bought all the tens of thousands of songs in my music library, did you...? Pirating songs gives you variations of quality, hell even my own cd rips have variations. It's easier to get better quality files now than it was back in the days, kiddos, so yeah some songs in the archives needs to be updated with new files. I have some very ancient mp3's that are in really low sound, that i've instead downloaded newer versions of in better quality for the polls but y'all still give me shit about it because the artist have remastered the track to unrecognition or whatever so there's just no pleasing some people i guess lmao. 😂
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Do you like all the songs you've posted? No, lol. All the songs that are in my archive are songs I've at least liked enough once upon a time to save them, even if I'm not actively listening to them much anymore. Everything tagged as #new to admin :D are new songs to me that I may or may not like, regardless if they're submitted or if I've scouted them out myself only for the polls. :) Songs that I hate so much that I can't stand them are very few, and I won't waste time on adding them!
Did you change the song in the poll?? No. Maybe you clicked on the wrong one if I posted them too close together or maybe (most likely) tumblr has screwed something up for you. Some songs don't even show at times because it's tumblr being tumblr, just wait it out for a few minutes and tumblr will eventually remember to play the audio. So far there's only one song that I had to re-upload because tumblr killed the file. I can change the clip to better audio or to another part of the same song, but I never replace it to a different one once it's out there for you to vote on, I don't see the point of doing that.
Why are some polls audio files and other video files? Again: tumblr being tumblr. They won't allow some songs to be uploaded as audio, but using them in videos is ok. I hate the audio-as-video format and it requires even more effort from me so I'm not doing it on purpose. :)
I don't remember if I've heard this song before or not. If you know you've heard it, like if you're a fan or a hater or the song has been constantly played on the radio, you know it. (this is why the phrasing has been changed again in the latest polls) If you don't remember it, or just vaguely, or just a specific tiny part used in a meme/tiktok video, choose first time. The only thing that matters is the yes or no, knowing it or not is just an added fun but don't take it too seriously. :) Look at it sort of like "old fan/casual listener/hater vs new listener".
The part of the song that you posted SUCKS!!!! You should have just posted this one specific famous part for people to vote yes! "don't post the actual song in this song poll" ...................................like, no. not gonna post just the meme-bits or the drops or the whatever. Yeah i saw all the comments how you all clicked dislike on "Out of Touch" because you voted before you got to the chorus 😂 That's an honest opinion about the song lol, because a song is more than just a catchy chorus or a big drop. But yeah, sometimes one verse of a song would've maybe been better to post instead of that other verse, I'm with you on that.
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I queued this song to see what it is but it's still stated as being Anonymous for me! Reblogs, drafts and queues will only show you what's there at the time, like a screenshot. It won't update automatically. All your reblogs, drafts and queued posts from when the poll is active will only show up as Anonymous songs. Always go back to the original post to see the song reveal. If the info isn't there, then give me a day or two to update the post because most likely things are too busy irl. 💖
I voted wrong/voted before I recognized the song! Will you change my vote? No, I'm not recounting anything wth. 😅
I'm embarrassed. I like the song but I don't want others to know that I do. I promise you that nobody but you can see how you've voted. Not me or your mutuals. Only you see what you've voted on. It's ok to like bad songs, and it's ok to like good songs by bad people. Don't let others shame you for that.
How do I vote on this cover/remix that was posted instead of the original? If you feel like this version is close to the original that you like, vote yes. If you don't feel like this version does the original song justice, vote no, even if it hurts.
This song that I don't know samples another song that I do know. How do I vote? I don't consider samples being used as being the same song, so pick first time. Unlike covers/remixes, the original song that has been sampled might show up at a later time, if it hasn't already been on here before.
How does so many people not know this song!!? Everyone is not your age/not from your country and your experience is not universal. 🤷‍♀️ That being said, I too get wtf-moments sometimes because some songs really do get wacky results, so, yeah 😂
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Have you ever thought about-- Yes.
I demand you give me a rickroll!!!!!! Ask things nicely instead of demanding things from me. (This is the most common demand I've gotten, sigh. Thanks to those of you who have at least asked nicely and/or with a sense of humour!)
Please do a rickroll? It's already been posted in a bonus poll. It might show up in a "real" poll in years from now if this poll blog is still active but as of now it was added to a tumblr meme post where it was better suited.
I'm gonna ignore that submissions are closed and send you song suggestions anyway!!!! They will be deleted because they're not asked for atm. Unless you're the artist. Exceptions can be made in that case. :)
This poll blog doesn't respect my requirement to know who the artists are before I listen to their songs because of my need - that is very important that everyone else needs to acknowledge and follow - to know if a person is of a good moral standing according to my own views!! 😡 There's other poll blogs better suited for you. Not everything online has to be adjusted to fit *your* particular needs. 🤷‍♀️ (YES i've actually gotten this demand way too often. Sigh.)
Why was my reblog hidden from the notes where I spew hatred over an artist?! You are censoring me!!!! Did you mention the artist by name, or other obvious spoilers? Don't post spoilers. 🤷‍♀️
You hid this other comment I made with no spoilers!!!!! Sometimes comments show in dashboard mode but not in app mode and vice versa, or not even in the notifications. Haven't we already established that tumblr finds easy stuff extremely difficult? Also, sometimes you and I don't share an opinion of what a spoiler means. To all of you who have claimed an artist's name isn't a spoiler, yeah it's kind of a big one. As for the artist mentioning their own name or the song title in the song, you only hear that once you listen to the clip. Knowing it before even clicking to play the music is a spoiler.
Why have you turned off replies? I want to say things without reblogging!! I mean 🤷‍♀️ I'm sure you know why. Replies and anons have been turned off from the very beginning. The few times replies actually have been turned on, it's been stated as such and been very temporarily, like when we've discussed music in some post.
Turn on anon!!! I'm to shy to say thing off-anon! I mostly reply to things privately, or this blog would be nothing but q&a. Anons are off for a reason. Abuse and death threats are to be associated with the sender's account for all to see. I'm always nice to nice people so there's no need to worry about sending me questions or tagging me in things. :) 💖
I demand you to-- Pay me. :)
Shut up and take the abuse thrown at you personally because you're just a poll blog! You are aware that the poll blogs on tumblr aren't actually run by bots, right? Don't be an obnoxious twat. (and ughh yes, this too has been said to me several times. Sigh.)
I want you to add this song I want RIGHT NOW and/or i WANT these other options added now! Rich people can always break all the rules, just like irl. Just give me the $$$$ 😘
I don't like this song because I don't understand the language. Please only post English songs. Ok well, I mean, you can always learn other languages. 🤷‍♀️ Just like how I learned English.
If anyone feels targeted by these last questions without me meaning to, I'm sorry. These actually are the most common questions and comments and demands I've gotten in my askbox. Especially when the blog was new and people Demanded Their Rights to have me adjust everything to suit them. Don't feel like you can't state your thoughts in reblogs or in messages because as long as you're not being rude to me, my attitude on some answers isn't targeted at you, only at them. 💖 Remember to just have fun with the polls and hopefully you and/or your mutuals discover new music!
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End Game 2
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No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, stalking, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: Your gaming buddy asks to meet up but it doesn’t go exactly as planned.
Characters: Andy Barber
Note: we're here to boo Andrew.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.
I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖
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“So, you’re coming?” Jacob’s voice quavers with excitement. You can’t imagine how he’d sound if you said no. You hate letting people down, it seems to be all you've ever done.
“Uh, yeah,” you say as you steer around the track; opting for some MarioKart over Minecraft that night, “boss says it’s no problem to get the days off. Just have to make it up after. Is... Is everything still good on your end?” 
“Oh yeah, sure thing,” he assures buoyantly, “I can’t wait. Did you still wanna split the airBnB?” 
“Actually, I got a place to stay for the night then I’ll take the early bus back,” you explain as Princess Peach knocks you off the track, “argh!” 
“Right, that’s good,” he says, “good to know you won’t be stranded out there.” 
“Mhm,” you use your boost to catch up to Peach and get your revenge. You don’t mention that Kara will be with you at the con. You just want to be sure this isn’t something wonky. “It’ll be nice to get out of town. My grandma will probably be happy to have the place to herself.” 
“Yeah,” he scoffs, “what’s her problem anyway?” 
“Just the way she is. She likes her space,” you shrug, “I don’t know, I don’t think she expected to be raising her granddaughter...” 
“Ah, yeah, I guess that would be stressful,” he says, “still, seems like you’re not too bad to be around. Got a job, go to school, all that. Think my dad would love it if I put in half as much effort.” 
“Yeah? You make him sound like a hard ass.” 
“Can be. Lawyer, so kinda his schtick,” he chuckles. 
“Oo, fancy,” you snort. Maybe if either of your parents had been lawyers, you wouldn’t be living off your grandma’s resent.  
“I guess. Never really see him that much...” he grumbles. 
“Hm, well, no winning, is there?” You mutter. 
“Not really,” he sighs and hisses, “ugh, Toad!” 
You chuckle and cross the finish line. A respectable second. You wait for him to finish and stifle a yawn. 
“Tired?” He asks. 
“Little.” 
“Me too, long day,” he groans, “neck’s killing me.” 
“Oh, what’d you do--” 
“You know, I’m-- an idiot. Was messing around on my bike.” 
“Of course,” you snicker, “well, if you don’t mind, I’m gonna sign off. I don’t wanna keep my grandma up and my head’s starting to go.” 
“Sure, I gotta get up early anyway,” he sounds less than enthused. “Good night.” 
“You too.” 
“Tomorrow?” 
“Can’t, work. Day after?” 
“Okay, I’ll make it work,” he confirms, “I’m excited about meeting up. Aren’t you?” 
“Yep,” you try not to show your doubt. You’re still not really sure about everything. 
“Can’t wait,” he rasps and the silt in his tone makes you shiver. 
“Yeah, er, bye then,” you hit end session and take off your headset, your ears tender and a bit sweaty. Even if it is awkward, at least you’ll get to hang with Kara for a bit. You haven’t seen her since grad. 
🎮
You’re already exhausted and you’re not even inside yet. The line for the convention is bustling and your excitement keeps you going as you and Kara gab away and move with the slow crawl. The sun beams down and has you sweating, though you could easily blame that on your nerves too. 
“So, this Jacob... is he cute?” She winks. 
“Kara,” you roll your eyes, “it’s not like that. Really. We just game.” 
“Oh yeah. But do you want it to be more?” She teases. 
“You know I’m not really into all that. I don’t have room for a boyfriend in my life.” 
“So boring. Never change, girlie,” she nudges you playfully. “But really, that’s smart. Calvin is too much. I’m thinking of cutting him loose.” 
“Again?” You squint. 
“Not my fault he keeps coming back,” she giggles. 
You peer around, searching out a familiar face amid the ocean of strangers. You haven’t seen Jacob yet. You’re almost hoping he doesn’t show up. Then again, why wouldn’t he? He paid for you to be here. The reminder of the fact strikes guilt in your chest. 
You pause as your eyes catch another pair, further back in the queue. An older man with a beard. He stands out among the crowd. He wears a tidy button-up where most wear graphic tees or cosplay attire. He stares for a moment before he turns away and looks down, probably at whatever kid dragged him there. 
“Well, what are you going to do if he sees you and falls in love?” Kara asks. 
“Whatever,” you roll your eyes. 
“If he’s a nerd like you, how could he not?” 
“Hey,” you frown. 
“What? You’re like the sexy gamer girl type. Isn’t that what dudes want?” She shrugs. “Let me see his pic again. He’s a skinny little thing. He’d definitely be into you.” 
“Urgh, stop,” you cross your arms. 
“Sorry, I’m only playing. You just seem so nervous, I’m trying to loosen you up.” 
“I know,” you puff, “it’s just... I should’ve just said no. This is stupid. I don’t know why I even agreed.” 
“To get out of that shithole,” she snips. “Why do you think I hauled ass the minute I popped by grad cap on?” 
“Mm, yeah, I just hope... do you think he really wants that? Maybe I gave him the wrong idea. Oh, Kar, I really didn’t mean to lead him on.” 
“No, no, I’m sure it’s nothing you did if he does. I mean, he’s probably a virgin so...” 
“That’s mean,” you pout. 
“What, so are you,” she laughs. 
“Exactly,” you shake your head and drop your arms, a buzz jittering your skirt pocket.  
You look down at yourself as you slide your phone free. That was probably a bold choice but it’s so damn hot out. Besides, your Pikachu tee is loose enough to counteract the denim sheath. You turn the screen up, shading it with your hand as you read. 
‘Sorry, not going to make it. Something came up. 🙁' 
You frown and reread the message. Really? You came all the way here, took time off of work, and he’s flaking? 
“What’s up?” Kara asks as she clicks her manicured nails impatiently and stands on her toes, trying to see past the bodies ahead. 
“He just cancelled,” you mutter and type in your reply. 
‘Oh no. Hope it’s nothing bad. Maybe another time.’ 
You hit send and drop your shoulders. You’re surprised how disappointed you are. More so about the wasted effort than anything. Even if you are a bit relieved, it’s shitty. 
“Ah, bullshit!” Kara sneers, “what the hell? What did he say?” She reaches for your phone and you hold it out of her grasp. “That fucker.” 
“It’s probably not his fault. Shit happens.” 
“Babe, you’re gonna settle for a lot of nonsense if you keep that attitude. I’d be friggin pissed if I was you. He brings you all the way here and now he’s too good for you. I bet he saw some cute girl in line and she smiled at him once so now he’s ditching,” she scowls, “I hate boys.” 
“I’m sure... it’s nothing,” you say glumly as your phone vibes again. 
‘I’m real sorry. I hope you still have a good time. Take lots of pictures.’ 
You don’t respond. You lock your phone and put it back in your pocket. It never feels good to be stood up. Even then. 
“You know what, screw him,” Kara snarls, “let’s go in there and buy you the cutest plushie you can find. Hell, maybe you can find an even cuter guy.” 
“Kar,” you warn her. 
“Fine, just the plushie. Maybe two,” she trills, “forget that loser.” 
🎮
The chaos of the convention wipes away the dark cloud over you. You’re almost thankful that Jacob gave you the opportunity to catch up with Kara. You didn’t realise how much you missed her. It’s perfect day where you can forget about your grandmother and your lame job and everything else. 
You rush around from booth to booth. You look at fanart, handmade figures, and stuffies. You’re mindful of your wallet and how empty it really is. You’ll get one thing and a snack. That’s all you can afford.  
As the hours roll by, your early morning bus ride and time spent standing out in the hot sun catch up to you. You feel your muscles starting to ache and your eyelids turning fuzzy. You yawn as you shuffle behind Kara as she waits in line to get a signature from the one D-list celeb she’s heard of. You’d get one too but it’s way too expensive. 
“Hey,” you rub your cheek, “mind if I sit and wait? I wanna grab a soft pretzel anyway.” 
“Sure,” she agrees easily, “looks like it’s gonna be a while.” 
“Want me to bring you a drink or something?” You offer. 
“Nah, just text me where you are so I can find you,” she says. 
You leave her reluctantly. You’d rather not be wandering alone through the hordes but your feet are killing you and your stomach’s been roaring for the last hour. You stand in line for the pretzel stall and get yours with cinnamon sugar and syrup. Messy but delicious. 
You find a table in the corner and settle in. You put your phone beside the napkin and tear apart the doughy goodness. Your phone lights up with a notification from the merge game you like to play and you see several other icons; missed messages. 
You focus on your snack, savouring each bite, as your eyes drift around the crowded centre. You can barely see some of the booths as hordes cluster around. Some cosplayers bat at each other with toy swords as children fight over the arcade machines. You’re overwhelmed by the sheer amount of activity all around. 
You put your head down trying to block out the lights and noise. You feel yourself getting overstimulated. It’s like when you’re in the lecture hall and suddenly you can hear every sniff, sneeze, and keystroke. You close your eyes as you wipe your fingertips on the edge of the napkin, only half-finished your pretzel. 
“Looks good,” a deep voice cuts through the blaring din. 
As you recognise the timbre, your heart squeezes and the world pinpoints at the centre of your skull. You open your eyes and slowly raise your head. You blink dumbly at the unfamiliar man stood in front of you. You think you’ve seen him before, or at least he sticks out from the typical convention attendee. 
It isn’t that he’s too old, there’s lots of older geeks hanging around but they have neckbeards and greasy combovers. His hair is tidy and his beard trimmed close. His clothing also lacks the typical Dorito dust or anime character. You remember, he was outside in the line. 
“Uh, hello?” You utter. 
“Sorry I’m late,” he says as he pulls out the chair across from you. He sits as your insides plunge. You know his voice. 
“Jacob?” You murmur in shock. How? Why? This isn’t the stringy teenager you met online. 
He nods, his jaw tensing, and he crosses an arm over the table, pointing to your half-eaten pretzel, “what’d you get on yours? I can’t decide between sweet or savoury.” 
“Who... are you?” You croak, head spinning as your eyes prick. You knew something was weird. You knew you weren’t talking to Jacob or whoever that boy was in the pictures. 
He takes a breath and lets it out slowly. As his chest deflates, you do too. He’s older than you, bigger than you, and by the looks of him, a lot better off. Why the hell would he be chatting with you? Why would he lie to you? 
“You’re right. I’m not Jacob,” he confesses, the colour draining from his face. He steeples his fingers and considers his next words carefully. You sit back and hug yourself defensively. This is fucked. “My name is Andy, Jacob is my son.” 
“Your son?” You eke out, “why-- why would you lie?” 
He cringes and takes another breath, “he was my son,” he corrects himself, “he... passed.” 
You feel like you’ve been struck. Your mouth falls open, stunned. Not only did he hide behind his son’s photos, but his dead son’s. Oh, god. You feel sick. No, you feel stupid. 
“Look, please, just hear me out. I just—it wasn’t meant to go on this long. When I first lied to you, it was supposed to be that one time. I was... I was lost. I just lost Jacob and I was going through his things. I started playing because I missed him. I wanted to feel like he was still there--” 
“No, no, you got on discord and you started talking to me. As him!” Your voice shakes and your eyes tinge. “That’s not just missing him.” 
“I know, you’re right. I lied but... I got lonely playing by myself so yes, I went onto that discord. You were nice. You didn’t call me a noob or whatever. And... and after work, looking forward to hearing your voice, it got me through a lot of pain. Being alone in that house after so long, I couldn’t cope--” 
“So you lied to me?” You stand and snatch your phone, nauseous to the core, “you manipulated me. How do you know—if you had just been you that I would’ve been any different? If you just wanted to play games, to be friends--” 
“I was scared--” 
“I don’t care if you were scared,” you hiss as you stomp forward. “You’re an adult.” 
He stands and blocks your path. You recoil, put off by his height. He’s a lot bigger on his feet. 
“Please, move or... I’ll scream,” you breathe. 
“You don’t have to do that. Just hear me out,” he pleads. 
“I don’t want to hear anything else from you, Jacob. Or Andy. Or whoever you really are,” you sneer, “move.” 
He shudders and hangs his head. He makes himself seem small as his shoulders round and he backs out of your way. You bite down and march past him.  
You need to get to a bathroom. Now. You’re going to spew up your guts. More important, you need to get yourself together before you go find Kara. She can’t know this happened. It’s too embarrassing. 
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mrm0rgansw0man · 3 days
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hi !! can i have a more angsty arthur fic of the reader admiring him from afar and wanting to give him all the love he’s deserving of but feels she doesn’t have the chance to ? :)))) happy ending would be nice maybe arthur reads a note of hers !
god i love writing angst. LETS DO THISSS
hope you enjoy!! Xx @risingtripletaurus
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I can let you down, I can make you Hurt.
Bitter, freezing cold. That was all you felt. Just the cold and the ache in your heart. Your whole chest ached, from the cold or from the emotions you were feeling you didn't know.
This whole Blackwater fucked up mess was just what you needed. You had already been struggling, being new to the gang and trying to help out and earn your keep. And, not only that, but Arthur Morgan hated you. You were sure of it, you had no clue what you did to offend him but just until right before this mess he started pulling away from you.
He was always friendlier with all the women of the camp, but you and him had taken a liking to each other. But one day, it just stopped. The hellos. The cups of coffee he'd bring you every morning. The shared cigarettes. The random talks, it was so nice. You'd be lying if you said you hadn't fallen for him. You though he could be falling for you too, but looks like you were wrong. You knew it was too good to be true.
"You're so down." Charles said simply. You looked up at him, not even having noticed he came into the cabin you had been sitting in.
"I can practically feel it in the air around you." He continued. Your eyes flit away from him and back to the floor. You watched a few snowflakes melt into your boots.
"Why do you care?" You asked quietly. "I'm sure you've got much better things to worry about than my problems."
Charles shrugged. "Just wanted you to know I'm here if you want to talk. I'm not doing much lately, cause of this hand. So I've noticed more."
Tears welled in your eyes. You blinked them away before you thought Charles could notice. But he still did.
"I've never seen you like this before. I'm worried about you, (Name)." Charles said. His voice more stern now. "Ask anyone, it feels like and looks like, no offense, that the life has been drained out of you."
"It's jus' the cold..." You mumbled. "I'm fine Charles.."
"You know, I was sitting in this cabin with you for hours. You didn't move once. You didn't even know I was here, did you? And Abigail came in to try and talk to you, but it was like you were in a whole different world."
Uh oh. Fuck. He's got you there. You didn't even know Charles had come in, let alone Abigail.
"Have you ever had to love someone from a distance Charles?" You asked weakly. You finally lifted your head enough to meet his eyes.
"No." Charles said with a sigh. "But I can't imagine it's a great feeling."
"It's not." You said with a sniffle. "Not at all."
"Can I ask who it is?" Charles asked you cautiously.
You let out a choked cry. You took a few deep shaky breaths, trying to keep yourself together. It was getting harder and harder by the second. God dammit Charles why do you have to care?
"Arthur." You whispered, wiping away the few tears that managed to escape your eyes. "It's Arthur."
Charles didn't say anything, he only nodded. So you kept talking.
"He was so kind to me when I first started riding with you. We got on real well too." You said, finally starting to weep. Who cares anyways? "I started falling for him. Quick and hard, and could you blame me?"
"No, I was convinced he was sweet on you." Charles admitted. Though all it did was send more tears floding out of your eyes.
"He'd bring me coffee in the mornings. We'd talk. He always said Hi to me at the very least when we crossed paths." You said softly. "And he made sure I was eatin'- I mean you know how I was when I first got here."
"Always sick and thin as paper." Charles said grimly, having been on of the few people that helped take care of you during that hard time.
"Neither of us sleep very well, he'd come find me or I'd go find him. We had such nice talks on those nights, he opened up to me. Like really, really opened up to me. And I opened up to him too." You continued, your cries becoming harder and your voice rising.
"I don't know what I did!" You cried. "But one day it all just stopped! He wouldn't talk to me, he hasn't even looked me in the eyes Charles! I don't know what's wrong with me! I just want to love him!"
"Oh (Name)..." Charles started, but you cut him off.
"He deserves so much Charles!" You sobbed. "He is such a good man, no matter what he says when he looks in the mirror! I just want to love him, he doesn't even need to love me back! Do you know how pathetic that is? How disgustingly pathetic I am to love him like this!?"
You inhaled and exhaled at a frantic pace, running your hands over your tear soaked face. It was too much. You couldn't breathe. You wrapped your arms around yout face and buried yourself in your knees. Charles rushed to your side, kneeling down next to you. He placed both his hands on your shoulders and just stayed there, giving you something to hang onto. Keeping you grounded.
You finally lifted your head and met Charles's eyes, only to find them already locked on you.
"I just want to love him. T-that is all I w-want." You managed to get out between sobs. "And now I've lost m-my chance! I can't keep going like this Charles! He's- he's been through so much. That poor man has suffered and s-suffered and I just want t-to make him feel like he deserves something!"
"Arthur-"
"Needs me! And I need him to need me because look how badly I need him! If he doesn't love me the-then what am I supposed to do?!"
You broke apart, sobbing harder than you were before. Probably harder than you have ever cried in your life. Charles caught you, and he wrapped his arms around you. He let you sob and scream into his chest until you couldn't breathe.
"I just want a chance I just want a chance! I want to know what I did wrong!" Was all you could say, over and over again. Charles rocked you back and fourth, letting you cry yourself out. It took at least an hour, but eventually your cries had lulled to a stop.
Once your breath had returned to normal, Charles spoke.
"I'm going to go get Miss Roberts and Miss Gaskill. They'll take care of you. I'm going to talk to Arthur, don't you worry about this for another second." Charles said soothingly. It was all you could do to nod a yes at him. He pulled away from you, but right as he was about to reach the door you called out for him.
"Why are you being so kind to me?" You asked horsely. Charles looked back at you and gave you a small smile.
"First of all, I like you. Quite a bit, your a good person (Name)." He said simply. "And secondly, you haven't moved from that spot for over a day and you haven't even noticed. Someone needed to do something."
And with that, he left. You sat in silence until Abigail and Mary-Beth showed up. They tried to talk with you but you didn't have the strength to even reply to them. They accepted this, and helped you to your room and laid you down in your cot.
You laid there for what felt like hours, completely lost in thought.
"Glad to see your feelin' better, Miss." Arthur said, handing you a tin cup filled with scalding hot coffee. You took it gratefully.
"Thank you, Mr. Morgan." You said with a smile. "I've got to say I'm liking your company more and more each morning you visit me."
"Oh don't be too flattered, your jus' the only one up as early as me." Arthur said with a smirk, playfully elbowing you in the side. You chucked and hoped Arthur didn't see the blush spreading across your face.
"Well a girl can dream!" You said, that same flirty smirk crossing your face.
"Arthur! I need to talk to you!" Dutch called.
Arthur groaned in annoyance. He turned to leave, but at the last moment he turned back. He grabbed your hand and squeezed it.
"Meet me at the campfire tonight. We never get t' talk without gettin' bothered." Arthur said. You nodded your head happily as he turned to leave, running of to do whatever the hell Dutch wanted him for.
You felt yourself smiling at the memory, even if it was just a weak one.
That night at the campfire was the first of many, you two met every night you could. And that was when you truly began to fall for Arthur, those nights by the burnt out campfire. The last night it happened, you told him about your life before joining the gang, and why you were so sick when you first arrived.
"No one in my family was right." You said with a deep sigh. "My daddy hung himself in our living room right before my mama had me. And since then she just never had any happy in her head."
"Jesus.." Arthur mumbled. "Was your Mama good t'you, at least?"
"Pfft, no!" You said with a laugh. You took another swig of whiskey from the bottle Arthur stole from Pearson for you. "Beat me halfway to hell every other day. I think she had some disease. Think I might have it too, honest to god."
"D'ya really think that?" Arthur asked, taking a swig of his own whiskey bottle.
"I jus' get so low sometimes.. Not enough happy in my own head." You said sadly. "Not something I can really help, but it happens. Part of the reason I was so sick when I first got here, that and being out in the elements."
"What a woman you are, Miss. (Name)!" Arthur said with a laugh. "Survivin' yer' Mama, survivin' runnin' away into the wild, and survivn' yourself!"
Arthur and you spent a lot of time talking about your past life that night, so much time you had finished that whole bottle of whiskey. Bittersweet tears filled your eyes as you remembered what happened next.
You stood up from the ground, and wobbled your way over Arthur and poked him in the chest.
"Tell me, Mr. Morgan!" You slurred. "What have you survivedddd?"
"Oh sweetheart, we ain't got time for that tonight." He said, shaking his head at your drunken boldness.
"Pleaseeee Arthurr??" You whined, a wrong step sending you tumbling down into his lap. He wrapped his arms around you instinctively, and you smiled happily. It was a giddy childlike smile that Arthur would never forget.
Arthur had no idea what possessed him to do so, but he gulped down the last of his whiskey and started talking.
"My mama died when I was real young..." Arthur said, his voice going quiet. "My daddy was a thief, a petty one at that.. Wasn't even a real father. He wasn't good t'me at all. The lawmen got him when I was jus' eleven."
" 'M so sorry Arthur..." You said, wrapping your arms around him and hugging him tight. He rested his chin on your head and returned the hug, god it was so nice to be held like this. To be able to feel freely.
Arthur had no clue why he was so drawn to you from the very start, but ever since he first laid his eyes on you he couldn't get enough. He knew he was a goner, but he'd be lying if he said the thought didn't terrify him. Hell, sitting here like this with you terrified him! But even with the fear in the back of his mind, he could feel the whiskey clouding his thoughts and what little remained of the walls he so constantly put up crumbling.
Arthur went on about his family for a bit, and then told you all about getting taken on by Dutch and Hosea. He told you about what a deliquent he was, told you about when they brought John in. And Miss. Tilly. Then he told you all about a girl named Mary Linton, and about the love they used to share. You listened intently to every word, even in your drunken state. You prayed to whatever god above that you remembered this all tomorrow.
"I had a boy once." Arthur said, after a long stretch of silence. "His name was Issac. He passed on, though."
"Oh Arthur." You whispered, finding his hand and holding it tight. "I'm so sorry!"
"Some bastards killed him 'nd his Mama. Eliza." Arthur said, his voice breaking. "Shot 'em. All for a measly ten dollars."
"What is wrong with this world.." You murmred. Arthur just shook his head.
"I wasn't there f'him much. I shoulda been a better father to my little boy..." Arthur mumbled, his words starting to slur. "I was good to them when I was 'round, but that doesn't make up for nothin'. I'm a horrible person, (Name)."
You sat up, moving your legs around Arthur so you were straddling him. You grabbed his face in your hands, forcing him to look you in the eyes.
"Did you love his Mama? Did you treat her well?" You asked fiercely.
Arthur nodded his head frantically. The change in you startled him.
"Did you play with your boy? Did you hold him? Did you tell him stories, or sing him to sleep?" You pressed on, even with the tears forming in Arthur's eyes.
"Y-Yes!" Arthur said, stumbling over his words. "He was small, but he still liked to run. He liked being held-"
Arthur stopped, a strangled cry escaping his throat. You took your hands off of Arthur's face and wrapped both of your arms around his neck. He wrapped his arms back around you, burying his face in your hair and neck. Arthur thought that he should want to leave, but he realized he'd rather be buried alive then leave your arms right now.
"His favorite was 'Hush Little Baby'" Arthur said softly, you could feel the tears falling from his eyes now. "I was so happy to sing it to him the last time I...."
You sat up- which scared the wits out of Abigail and Mary-Beth-and covered your eyes. Trying to block out the image of what came soon after that.
The comfort you brought Arthur. The way he held your face in his hands. The kiss, so passionate. You both tasted of lust, whiskey, and pain. It was a fiery mix of emotions that sent you both stumbling into his cot and ripping off each other's clothes.
And then he wanted nothing to do with you.
"Honey? What's wrong?!" Abigail said, she wrapped her arm around you and Mary-Beth took your hands off of your face and held them.
Charles had given them a brief explanation of what had happened, but they were anxious for him to get back. They wanted to know what Arthur had to do with you being in an absolute state. They sent each other worried glances.
"When will Charles be back?" You asked with a sniffle. You leaned into Abigail and held Mary-Beth's hands tighter.
"Shouldn't be much longer, I promise honey." Abigail said.
"Want to tell us what's wrong?" Mary-Beth asked softly, she was testing the waters.
You looked between your two friends, and smiled weakly. God, you loved them so much.
"Okay."
»»———-  ———-««
"Arthur? Are you here?" Charles called out before going right into Arthur's room.
Charles found Arthur sitting on the edge of his cot. He was reading a letter.
"What is it, Charles?" Arthur said, still not looking up from the paper in his hands. Arthur didn't even seem like he was listening to Charles.
"Put that down. I need to talk to you." Charles said, his voice becoming more serious.
Arthur re-read the words written on the paper one last time before looking up at Charles.
'Arthur, please tell me whatever I did. I just want to talk to you again. Please, just talk to me whenever you read this. Your true friend, (Name)'
"You know, (Name) isn't doing good. She's been sitting in the corner of her room, curled up. Not moving, not talking. Nothing." Charles said simply.
Arthur's eyes widened, but he didn't say anything. Charles continued.
"I sat there with her for hours, and she didn't move a muscle. I watched Abigail come in and try and talk to her, but it was like she was talking to a wall." Charles said. "And that was after Molly had tried to talk to her for hours the night before. She's the one who came and got me."
"Is..is she alright?" Arthur asked, his nerves evident in his voice. He knew this was his fault. He could feel it in his bones. Oh god, he was a fucking idiot,
"No! She's not alright!" Charles snapped. "She barely even looks human! When I finally got through to her all she could do was cry! And she was crying about you!"
"No.." Arthur said softly. "Where is she now? I need to go see her-"
"You can go see her when we're done here." Charles said sternly. "Arthur, did you know she was in love with you?"
Arthur ran a hand over his face. Oh great, now he'd really done it.
'I'm such a piece of shit..' Arthur thought to himself. 'God.. Oh my god..'
"No." Arthur said. "I jus' thought... I don't know what I thought! I jus' didn't think she loved me."
"I just want to love him. He doesn't even need to love me back." Charles said with a sigh. "That's what she said to me, while she was sobbing so hard she couldn't breathe. And then 'I just want a chance! I want to know what I did wrong!'"
"I get yer' point!" Arthur shouted. "Jesus christ..."
"She's broken. Between having to be here, the whole mess in Blackwater and you completely disregarding her, she is broken." Charles said.
"I KNOW GOD DAMMIT I GET IT!" Arthur shouted, standing up from his cot. Charles stood firm, crossing his arms over his chest. He had said his part, now it was Arthur's turn to speak.
"Does.. Does she really love me?" Arthur asked weakly, taking off his hat and running his hands through his hair. Charles nodded. " I thought she was just' sweet on me a little bit, I thought I was jus' sweet on her.."
"Do you feel different now?" Charles asked. When he joined this gang, he never expected this would be the role he took on. Oh well.
Arthur stilled for a moment. He knew how he felt about you. But how could he even say it out loud, knowing how love had turned out for him in the past?
Mary had to leave him. Her father hated him because of his life as an outlaw.
His love for Eliza and his child only got them shot.
How could he condemn you, someone who has suffered and suffered, to a life with him? He wanted nothing more than to make you feel loved, protected, and cared for. He wanted to hold you like he did that night, to keep you close. To kiss away all your pain and never let you feel like you don't deserve it. Because you deserved the world, Arthur just didn't think he could give it to you.
And he was scared. He was so scared, so instead of being a decent fucking human he ran. And now look at what he did to you. Sent you right back to that dark part of your mind where you never wanted to be stuck in again.
"Yes." Arthur said finally. "But, how could I even try anythin' with her? I don't want nothin' happening to her cause of me! She deserves so much more than I can give her!"
"Arthur, I don't think you understand." Charles said with a deep sigh. "She doesn't want more! She isn't expecting anything of you! All she wants is. you."
"Why does this matter to you anyways! Who are you, t'come in here and talk t'me about this!" Arthur spat. "You have no right-"
"Yes I do!" Charles said, his voice rising. "I took care of (Name) when she first joined us, so I'll continue to take care of her now! She can't function! She needs you, Arthur! And I have a feeling you need her too."
Arthur stood there, glaring at Charles. He didn't know what to say. He wanted to scream foul things at him, for getting into his head like that. But he also wanted to thank him. For being there for you while he failed miserably.
"Figure it out. And then you go see her." Charles said coolly. "Don't go see her like this, she's not strong enough."
Charles left, Arthur's cold stare practically ushering them out the door. Arthur stood there for a few more moments, not really knowing what to do with himself. Charles had sent his mind reeling.
He knows what he wants to do. He wants to go to you, hold you, kiss you, tell you how sorry he is. Tell you that he loved you so much but he got scared, and instead of facing it like a man he ran like a boy. He never wanted to hurt you, but look how bad you were hurting now!
You loved him. And he loved you, but Arthur ran away and now would you ever be able to forgive him? He hadn't even told you he loved you! Arthur was sure he had already ruined everything. Not to mention the two of you slept together, which Arthur didn't even know if you knew it happned or not you were both so god damn drunk!
Arthur sat down and sighed. He took out the letter you left for him to find. He read it again, only this time he stopped over a certain line.
"Just talk to me."
It echoed in his mind. Arthur could practically hear your voice, begging him to talk to you. And he knew what he had to do. Arthur folded the letter up and placed it neatly in his pocket, before placing his hat back on his head. He made a beeline for the hut you were staying in with Molly.
»»———-  ———-««
You had just finished telling your sob story to Abigail and Mary-Beth when Charles returned, not even giving them a moment to react.
You didn't even look up at him when he came back, feeling so weak having to relive what happened with Arthur yet again.
"He's coming. I don't know when, he needed to collect himself. But he'll be here to see you, (Name)." Charles said softly. You nodded, reminding yourself to go and thank him properly when you were better.
"Miss Roberts, Miss Gaskill, please stay with her until Arthur gets here." Charles asked them. Of course they agreed. And then Charles left, god he needed a drink.
Abigail and Mary-Beth stay there with you, wrapped up in blankets in your cot. It was a comforting couple of minutes of silence before Arthur practically broke the door down and rushed into your room. Abigial and Mary-Beth said some hurried goodbyes to you before rushing out of the room.
You knew Arthur was there, but you couldn't look at him. You continued to lay down on your cot, wrapped up in blankets and facing the wall.
Arthur looked at you for a few moments, before taking a deep breath and starting to speak.
"(Name)" Arthur said softly. "Can I uh.. May I sit with you?"
You rolled over slowly, and forced yourself to meet Arthur's eyes. They looked just as broken as yours did when you looked in the mirror. You nodded yes weakly, and Arthur sat down on your cot next to you. He placed a hand on your shoulder, and you closed your eyes. Arthur saw the tears flowing from them.
"I'm so sorry honey." Arthur said with a shaky sigh. "I should never have pushed you away like that."
"You fucked me." You spat, opening your eyes to look at him. "You fucked me! And then you wouldn't even look me in the eyes!"
"You know!?" Arthur gasped, completely shocked. He didn't think you were sober enough to remember what happened that night.
"I OPENED UP TO YOU ARTHUR!" You yelled, finding the strength in your anger to sit up in your bed. "I GOT CLOSE TO YOU- I LET YOU IN! YOU KNOW THINGS ABOUT ME KNOW ONE ELSE DOES!"
Before you even knew what you were doing, you got up and started pounding your fists against Arthur's back. He was caught off guard, so you got a couple solid punches in before he turned around and grabbed you by the wrists.
"You FUCKED ME! AND THEN YOU THREW ME TO THE SIDE LIKE SOME WHORE! YOU MADE ME LOVE YOU! AND ALL FOR WHAT!? ALL FOR WHAT ARTHUR MORGAN!? IS THAT ALL YOU WANTED FROM ME FROM THE START!?" You cried, not knowing when the shouting stopped and your tears began.
You fought to get your wrists out of Arthur's grasp. But he wouldn't let you go. In fact he held on to you tighter, pulling you firm against his chest. He wrapped his arms around you tight and without even knowing what he was doing started peppering your head with kisses.
You punched, you sobbed, you screamed, you fought like a bat outta hell trying to get out of his grasp. But Arthur wouldn't let you go. He took every hit, every foul name and every insult.
Eventually, your thrashing stopped. Your sobs turned into small shaky breathes, and instead of punching him your arms were wrapped around his neck and you crawled into his lap. Arthur started rocking you back and fourth, and was whispering comforting things in your ear.
"I didn't know you remembered.." Arthur said softly. "Honey.. I thought I took advantage of you. I didn't think you'd wanna sleep with me if you were sober."
Arthur felt you softly shaking your head, but you didn't speak. So Arthur kept talking.
"I never woulda' acted how I did if I had known you remembered that night." Arthur whispered. "And, I can't lie to ya' honey. I was afraid. I didn't feel worthy of somthin' like what we had going on. I wasn't thinkin' right- actually I don't think I was thinkin' at all."
"Do you love me?" You asked, your voice a broken whisper. "Arthur I have loved you from the first moment I saw you. You know just as well as I do that there is some type of connection between us that we didn't even spark ourselves. Everyone saw it happen before their very eyes."
Arthur looked down at you, and you were looking up at him already. You looked like a scared little girl, and it broke Arthur's heart. How could he have done this to you?
Arthur swallowed thickly. It was now or never. He was afraid, but his fear meant nothing. Nothing mattered when it came to you. Arthur couldn't bare to lose you, especially not like this.
"Yes." Arthur breathed out, a small chuckle leaving him. "God, I love you so much. Please forgive me f'being such a goddamn moron-"
Before Arthur could continue, you grabbed Arthur by his coat collar and pulled him down into a passionate kiss. Arthur moved his hands to cup your face, using his thumbs to wipe the tears that fell from your closed eyes.
You kissed until the both of you needed to pull away for air, and then Arthur kissed you again. He never thought he'd be able to feel your soft and loving lips against his own ever again, so he made sure to savor every moment.
Once you had both caught your breath, Arthur sat there. He held your face in his hands. The love in his eyes sent a blush to your cold and tear stained face.
"I love you (Name) (Last-name)." Arthur said, placing a gentle kiss to your forehead. "S'much. More than you'll ever know. More than I'll ever be able to show ya' sweetheart."
You let out an airy laugh, and for the first time in a long time you felt like you could breathe. Your chest wasn't heavy anymore and it felt like your heart was actually beating.
"But I sure as hell will try. Like you said, there is somethin' between us that's not even we could control." Arthur said softly. The smile on his face sent butterflies to your stomach. " 'M so sorry I made you feel so horrible. I'll do everythin' I can to make this right. To make us right, honey."
"It's okay.." You whispered. "It's not entirely your fault, y'know I'm sick anyway-"
"Which is another reason why I shoulda' been smarter!" Arthur said, his voice soft still but also firm. He pulled you into another hug. "I need to keep the happy inside your head."
"You remember that?" You gasped. You were deeply touched that he had remembered something so small.
"I'd have to be dead to forget any of the talks I've had with you sweetheart." Arthur said, his tone nothing but truthful. You smiled into his chest, his words made you feel like you were floating on a cloud.
You both sat there in a comfortable silence, Arthur gently rubbing your back and rocking you back and fourth. You had your eyes closed, listening to the steady beat of his heart. Arthur noticed a shift in your breathing, and he knew you had fallen asleep.
As quietly and comfortably as he could, Arthur shifted so that you were both laying down again. Arthur wrapped you up in a blanket and let out a content sigh. This felt so right. So perfect. He was still scared, but he couldn't let it keep him from you. It was better to be afraid with you, so you could learn and grow together, instead of pushing himself away and hurting the both of you.
"I'm gonna give you the world, my sweet girl. Jus' you wait and see.." Arthur whispered. He planted a kiss on the top of your head, before drifting off himself.
»»———-  ———-««
a/n: i hope you guys enjoy this! ive literally spent all my free time on it the past few days lol i got wayyy to invested into this, but are we suprised at this point??? Xx
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orphiclovers · 5 hours
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Actually I'm not done talking about yoohankim's awful digital footprint pre-scenarios. Kim Dokja gets a lot of flack for being chronically online and cringe and that's fair enough but let's just acknowledge that neither Yoo Joonghyuk or Han Sooyoung are ANY better.
For Han Sooyoung it's obvious. Despite having her own sucessful webnovel, presumably with fans who support her, she gets obsessed with her one hater who thinks she is a plagiarist, finds the "original" novel where this guy was the only commenter on every chapter, and instead of reading her own comments she spends her time reading HIS and imagining he's saying that about her writing. She does this for years. DERANGED BEHAVIOUR. Pre-scenarios Han Sooyoung has no excuse to be acting this crazy. Sent to internet jail for being weird online.
1863rd Han Sooyoung. Automatically get a pass to act unhinged bc after going through the apocalypse that's just expected and also the only person she talks to for 13 years is Kim Dokja and a creepy old man who calls her god, BUT. That being said she's a perfectly average and healthy internet user! Spends literally every waking moment writing a shitty webnovel so hard pieces of her soul chip away and infuse in it, sure, but she doesn't bother anyone, just does her own thing, posts the chapters and occasionally chats with her one commenter. The most normal one here. Somehow.
Kim Dokja. Big fan of a webnovel and can get intense about it sometimes, starts fights online defending his fave character, recommends the same novel so much he gets banned from forums, whatever. WE'VE ALL BEEN THERE IS WHAT IM SAYING. This is nothing too crazy, only about the level of an average fandom superfan. Uses his real name online which is certainly a choice but some people do that in real life too. Giving him a pass, I was also a cringey emo teen on the internet once. (and im still cringe and emo)
Yoo Joonghyuk as seen in Yoo Mia side story. Absolutely glued to his phone. He checks it while eating breakfast, while in the car being driven to work, while literally walking down the street so that Yoo Mia has to tell him to put it away and hold her hand! He is basically addicted to reading hate comments about himself. In his narration he mentions that there are only a few regulars in the forums he lurks in and that he recognizes all their usernames, accidentally revealing that he's in too deep and officially lost in the sauce. Even his manager tells him he should stop reading the comments because they clearly upset him, but he justifies it to himself by thinking quote, "If someone has a grudge against him, he just needs to be prepared to face that hatred. Then everything is under his control."  That last line especially is such a cope, and reveals that this behavior is another one of his desperate attempts to feel in control of his life, and as pathetic as that is and as much as I feel sympathy this is being weird online and I'm sending him to Internet jail.
Bonus round: Secretive Plotter. Need I say anything. Absolutely glued to his phone AGAIN, no it doesn't make it better that sometimes it's his kkomas instead of him. Canonically has a bound book of every single comment Kim Dokja ever left on WOS, printed out, which is more freak mode than even Han Sooyoung went. Straight to jail.
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ryomens-vixen · 9 hours
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Yandere Toji Headcanons
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CW: Yandere shit. 🤷🏾‍♀️
Word Count: bitch idk I was just typing 💀
Author's note: Honestly I don't know where this came from I just sat here and realized on don't feed y'all enough so here you go.
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Yandere Toji the type of ngga to show up to your job demanding that you put that pussy on him one more time and he'll "leave you alone".
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to find out you're on a date- and come crash it. Immediately. I'm talking about he's showing the fuck out embarrassing you, trying to beat upp your date.
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to be outside your house dry humping the front door and begging for you to let him in because he "just wanna talk".
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to call you from a payphone just to be panting on the other end, then hang up.
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to get fed up with you playing are to get and rejecting him- so much that he's willing to risk you calling the police on him for breaking into your house.
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to hold you hostage in your own home until you give him another chance at a relationship with you
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to choke his dick with a pair of your unwashed panties and jerk in with them just so he can have to scent on your pussy on his thick, meaty cock.
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to put his nut in your shampoo bottle so you can have a piece of him with you whenever he's not around.
Yandere Toji would definitely make you eat his ass if given the opportunity too.
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to beat his meat to the memory of your voice... And he cums a lot.
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to eat your pussy while your sleeping because he was craving a "late night snack"
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to show up to your job, dick in hand, hearts in eyes and be begging you to let him rip that pencil skirt and stockings apart because in his words it's keeping him from HIS pussy.
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to make you cockwarm him during your online meetings... He says it makes him feel closer to you.
Speaking of cockwarming Yandere Toji the type of ngga to make you cockwarm him while your two sleep and not with your pussy- but with dat ass he loves how tight and snug it feels it's like your suffocating his cock and he loves it.
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to blow smoke up your coochie so "she" can get high with him.
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to tell you that you don't deserve his nut after hurting him so much- then proceeds to nut in you anyways.
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to get your car towed just so you can't go to work, you wants to keep you on his dick 25/8 and how the fuck can he do that if you're at work?
Yandere Toji the type of ngga act "nice" in front of your parents, but sluts you out in their own house. Making you choke and gag on his dick the whole time you're there.
Yandere Toji the type of ngga to off anyone you try to get with after him because you and him are soulmates, body, soul and mind... Especially body, nobody's dick will ever be better than his and you know it.
Yandere Toji breaks ALL the condoms at this point there is no use in buying any with how rough he is with you. It's almost like he's hate fucking you every time y'all have sex.
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Tags: @littlemochabunni @blkkizzat @arlerts-angel @ramonathinks @nkogneatho @tonycries @connorsui @honeeslust @halosdiary @hoshigaby @screampied @rinhaler @buttercupblu @triangularz
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estellan0vella · 1 day
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I'll Be Right Here ❀ Toji Masterlist HFBU
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You’re home alone, and the house is quiet. Toji left for work early this morning, promising to be back by dinner. The clock ticks softly on the wall, and the faint hum of the refrigerator is the only sound filling the room. You’ve been feeling fine today, just a little tired, but that’s not unusual.
You sit on the couch with a book in hand, trying to lose yourself in the story. The sun streams through the window, casting a warm glow on the room. You glance at your phone, checking for any messages from Toji. There’s nothing new, so you put it back down and return to your book.
Suddenly, a strange feeling washes over you. It’s hard to describe, but you know this sensation all too well. It’s the aura that precedes a seizure. Your heart races, and you feel a wave of anxiety crash over you. You try to focus on your breathing, grounding yourself in the present moment, but the feeling intensifies.
You reach for your phone again, trying to call Toji, but your hands are shaking too much to dial the number. Panic sets in as you realize what’s happening. You need to get to a safe place, somewhere you won’t hurt yourself if you fall.
You manage to get off the couch and stumble toward the bedroom. Each step feels heavier than the last, and your vision begins to blur. You make it to the bed and sit down, feeling the room spin around you. Your thoughts are jumbled, and it’s getting harder to think clearly.
You lie down, trying to get into a position where you won’t hurt yourself. The seizure hits you hard, and everything goes dark.
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When you come to, you’re disoriented and confused. Your body feels heavy, and your head is pounding. You’re not sure how much time has passed, but the sun is lower in the sky, casting long shadows across the room. You blink a few times, trying to clear the fog from your mind.
You hear the front door open and close, followed by the sound of footsteps. Toji’s voice calls out, “I’m home!”
You want to respond, to let him know you’re here, but your throat feels dry, and you can’t seem to form the words. You hear him moving through the house, and then his footsteps quicken as he comes down the hallway.
He appears in the doorway, and the moment he sees you, his expression shifts from casual to concerned. “Hey,” he says softly, coming to your side. “What happened?”
You manage to whisper, “Seizure.”
Toji’s face tightens with worry, and he gently lifts you into a sitting position, supporting your back with one strong arm. “Are you okay?” he asks, his voice laced with concern.
You nod weakly, though you’re not entirely sure if you are. “Just… tired.”
He wraps his arms around you, holding you close. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t here,” he murmurs into your hair. “I should have been here.”
You lean into his embrace, feeling the warmth and strength of his body. “It’s not your fault,” you say softly. “You can’t be here all the time.”
Toji’s hold tightens, and he kisses the top of your head. “I know, but I hate that you had to go through this alone.”
He helps you lie back down and covers you with a blanket. “Just rest,” he says gently. “I’ll take care of everything.”
You close your eyes, feeling the exhaustion from the seizure pulling you back into sleep. Toji stays by your side, his presence a comforting anchor in the storm of your mind. You know he’ll be there when you wake up, ready to help you through whatever comes next.
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When you wake again, it’s dark outside. The room is dimly lit by the soft glow of a lamp on the bedside table. Toji is sitting in a chair beside the bed, his eyes fixed on you. He looks relieved when he sees you’re awake.
“Hey,” he says quietly. “How are you feeling?”
You take a moment to assess yourself. The headache has dulled to a manageable throb, and the heaviness in your limbs has lessened. “Better,” you reply, your voice still a little shaky. “Tired, but better.”
Toji nods and reaches out to hold your hand. “I made some soup. Do you think you can eat something?”
You nod, realizing you’re hungry. He helps you sit up again, propping pillows behind your back for support. Then he leaves the room for a moment and returns with a tray holding a bowl of steaming soup and a glass of water.
He sits beside you on the bed, carefully spoon-feeding you the soup. It’s warm and comforting, and you feel a little stronger with each bite. Toji’s presence is reassuring, and you’re grateful for his patience and care.
As you finish the soup, you glance at him and see the worry still etched on his face. “I’m okay,” you assure him. “Really. It’s just part of having epilepsy.”
He sighs and sets the tray aside, then takes your hand in both of his. “I know, but I hate seeing you like this. I wish I could do more.”
“You’re doing everything you can,” you tell him. “Just being here helps more than you know.”
Toji looks at you, his eyes softening. “I love you,” he says quietly. “And I’m here for you, no matter what.”
You smile, feeling a surge of warmth in your chest. “I love you too, Toji.”
He leans in and kisses you gently, his lips soft against yours. “Get some rest,” he says when he pulls back. “I’ll be right here.”
You lie back down, feeling more at ease. Toji stays beside you, his hand holding yours as you drift off to sleep. You know there will be more challenges ahead, but with Toji by your side, you feel ready to face them. His love and support give you the strength to keep going, even on the hardest days.
And as you fall asleep, you’re grateful for the man who stands by you, no matter what.
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itsaspectrumcomic · 3 days
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Hi! 🐑🐑 anon here! thanks so much for the sheep :)))
I’m typing on my phone rn so I can type much better. Thank you for the advice!!! So here’s my Argentina thing:
I go to school here (7th grade) and we have breaks betweeen every class!!! 5-15 minute breaks! It’s illegal to not have them! It’s amazing!
i get to choose my lunch every day! I choose, I buy, and I can eat almost anywhere! I always eat the same thing (caprese roll) cuz autism and vegetarianism
speaking of which, we can eat in any of the breaks! We decide! It’s awesome!!!
no dress code! No awful suffocating polo shirts! With the worst fabric made! Just whatever I want to wear! Every day!!!
if I can’t do something, I’m allowed to not do it! I don’t have to do gym! I can sit it out! Gym is rlly hard for me bcuz I remember one day in my life when I could run for more than a minute without doubling over gasping at the end. Also, I hate it.
Not school related things now:
everyone uses their hands to talk! So I don’t get weird looks for my stimming!!! It’s incredible!!!!!
this is a ginormous one for me: THEY ARE SO BLUNT HERE. They use body language, which I can read well, and they just say what they mean! It’s such a relief!!! I can trust them!!! I don’t have to try doubly hard to figure out what they’re saying!!!! ITS SO SO SO AWESOME!!!!
also: a down point is that the greeting is usually a hug. But for some reason, here, hugs are better! They give me tons of warning bcuz I know when they’re gonna do it so I can prepare! Everyone talks with their body and it’s so much easier to understand!
Back to school real quick, we address the teachers by first names!!! No titles that seem to just distance us from ppl supposed to help us!!!
yeah, there are asshoels, but mainly, people are so nice! But in a genuine way! Not in a stupid social cues way! They are genuinely happy to see you, and if they aren’t, you know! No passive aggressive, no sarcasm (I like sarcasm sometimes but it can be annoying), just actual words!!!
wveeyone gets accommodations! The gym thing, are you tired? Or did you break your hand? Whatever! You can sit out! Do you need to doodle in class? There’s no, “do you have a (professionally diagnosed) learning disability? No? Then no.” Just yes! Sure! I love your doodles! Can u draw something for me?
Anyway, that was a lot. I’m actually fascinated in this and obsessed so thx so much for letting me info dump in your inbox!!!! Hope it’s interesting! There’s more, which I’ll add later!
-🐑🐏
Hi 🐑🐑! That all sounds great! I'm glad you've had such a positive experience there ☺️ I wish I could have got out of gym, I always found it so difficult and my PE teachers could be pretty mean 😔
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pitchsidestories · 2 days
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woso fanfics masterlist
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🌹II Lucy Bronze Masterlist
🌹II Alexia Putellas Masterlist
🌹II Alessia Russo Masterlist
🌹II Leah Williamson Masterlist
Arsenal
II Kyra Cooney-Cross x Reader
Girls like girls like boys do
A night at the Natural History Museum
II Laia Codina x Reader
Don’t Be So Hard on Yourself
II Kim Little x Reader
Just a little crush
II Katie McCabe x Reader
Arsenal Book Club
Dublin Girls
II Laura Wienroither x Reader
Pumpkins & Picnics
II Lotte Wubben-Moy x Reader
Dear Reader
II Lia Wälti x Reader
Autumn Leaves
The Beautiful Game
AS Roma
II Valentina Giacinti x Reader
To Rome with Love
Barcelona
II Ona Batlle x Reader
eras of us (1), (2)
II Aitana Bonmatí x Reader
God, it's brutal out here
The favourite (coming soon)
II Mariona Caldentey x Reader
like daylight
II Cata Coll x Reader
underneath your clothes
II Caroline Graham Hansen x Reader
the three musketeers
II Patri Guijarro x Reader
Secrets
II Mapi León x Reader
If I was a man
How You Get the Girl
II Fridolina Rolfö x Reader
New Year's Eve Party (1)
II Irene Paredes x Reader
familia
II Keira Walsh x Reader
and they were roommates
Bayern Munich
II Georgia Stanway x Reader
lost and found
Chelsea
II Millie Bright x Reader
Carve your name into my bedpost
II Niamh Charles x Reader
I loved you in secret
II Erin Cuthbert x Reader
A kiss from my enemy
II Sam Kerr x Reader
Better latte than never
II Zećira Mušović x Reader
The Princess Diaries
Eintracht Frankfurt
II Laura Freigang x Reader
one kiss is all it takes
II Sara Doorsoun x Reader
part of me wants forever
Manchester City
II Kerstin Casparij x Reader
Blue Hearts
II Lauren Hemp x Reader
Loving her is red (Referee's Version)
II Alanna Kennedy x Reader
You belong with me
II Leïla Ouahabi x Reader
New Year's Eve Party (4)
breathe
II Jill Roord x Reader
Because we were in screaming color
Nothing's New
Manchester United
II Mary Earps x Reader
There is light at the end of the tunnel
Other clubs
II Jenni Hermoso x Reader
Big Reputation
II Élisa De Almeida x Reader
we'll always have Paris
II Hayley Raso x Reader
It only hurts this much right now
II Grace Clinton x Reader
cheerleader
New Romantics
II Jen Beattie x Reader
Girlfriend Material
II Ana Maria Crnogorčević x Reader
Hate that I love you (coming soon)
Retired players
II Ali Krieger x Reader
Welcome to New York
You can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare
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angellesword · 15 hours
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BAGGAGE | JJK (03)
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Summary: Drowning in debt and blood, Jeon Jungkook knows he's better off alone, lest he brings people down with him.
But one drunken night changes everything.
In a blink of an eye, Jungkook found himself drowning not only in debt and blood, but also in dirty diapers and judgmental stares from you, a.k.a his long-lost love and the guardian of the son he didn't even know existed.
Genre and warnings: best friends to lovers, co-parenting, idiots in love, mutual pining, angst, fluff, implied smut, kissing, minor character death, slight getting back together, drama
Pairing: dad! Jungkook x mom!Reader
Word Count: 2.1k
←Previous Chapter (02) | Next Chapter (04) →
****
Eight Years Ago; 2015
There was a small food cart on the outskirts of Incheon where two best friends frequent.
“Oi, shithead. You’ve been fucking staring at your food for twenty-two minutes already. What the fuck is wrong with you? ”
Jungkook whined, complaining about how creepy it was that his best friend knew how long he looked at his food and how you spit out three profanities in one sentence.
“Shut up.” your face turned red, embarrassed that your habit of knowing the exact time was showing. You developed this meticulousness back when you were writing your thesis paper. Time was precious. Thanks fuck you were done with it.
You graduated today. You and Jungkook were currently eating noodles to celebrate. Your best friend initially demanded that you cook his favorite crab spring roll, but your hands were tied. The graduation ceremony took forever to finish; your professors and friends even pulled you to celebrate after.
You were not a killjoy, but you didn’t want to end this day without seeing your best friend, so you quietly ditched the party and sought Jungkook’s company instead.
“You really came to see me. What a good girl you are.” Jungkook cooed when he saw you waiting at his doorstep. “ Here, your graduation gift.”
“HA!?” You were dumbfounded upon seeing his present. “You got me a choker?!”
“Of course! You are so busy these days. I got you a collar so you wouldn’t forget who you belong to.” Jungkook said in jest to conceal his selfishness. He wished you could spend more time with him, not just fleeting moments like eating spicy noodles in a small food cart, which he didn’t even like.
“Why the fuck did you order it if you don’t like spicy noodles!?” A vein popped into your head.
Jungkook groaned, “You know how much I hate upsetting a pretty lady.”
The ‘pretty lady’ Jungkook was referring to was an old lady called Louisa, the owner of the ADA--the food cart. This place was near your high school alma mater. You and Jungkook still went here despite graduating high school many years ago.
Jungkook usually ordered the shop’s best-seller crab spring rolls, which inspired you to make your version of said food. You remembered begging Louisa to teach you how to make it, but the lady couldn’t just give away her family’s recipe. She taught you the basics, and that was where you started until you got Jungkook’s approval.
Content with your version, Jungkook no longer ordered spring rolls whenever you two ate at ADA. He preferred their crab noodles, but only spicy foods were left now since you arrived late. Jungkook refused to change stalls because he adored Louisa.
“You’re really something.” You bought a can of milk for Jungkook to counter the spiciness of his noodles.
Jungkook pinched your cheeks in appreciation. He was happy that he managed to take a few bites and ignore the old man across the street who was singing out of tune.
Natsume was what the old man called himself. He had been doing his business across ADA for a long time. The only reason he wasn’t shooed away was that his performance wasn’t a song at all. He was making up random tunes while expressing what the ‘future’ of some people would be like.
In short, he was a fortune teller, and all his ‘predictions’ apparently came true.
Jungkook didn’t dare believe him. He got particularly annoyed at Natsume when he predicted his future and yours. He sang, “Fall out, fall out, you two will have a fallout. One so nasty it will break your hearts, with no hopes of returning ~.”
Jungkook still cringed every time he remembered that. He looked at you, ready to ridicule the fortune teller in front of you.
Who would have thought this was the start of the fortune teller’s prediction coming true? You shouldn’t have opened your mouth, but you did, saying, “Jungkook, what are your plans for the future?”
You were influenced by the main topic at the graduation party earlier. Everyone you knew was planning their future. You feared Jungkook wasn’t doing the same—that he wouldn’t belong.
“Haven’t I told you already? Jimin-hyung and I are committed to our business.”
Your jaw automatically ticked upon hearing Jimin’s name. You never really hated anyone, but Jimin might be the exception. Jimin was why Jungkook dropped out of university. He coaxed Jungkook into emptying his bank account for Bighit, their Business Process Outsourcing venture.
Now Jungkook was broke, only relying on his small interest in Port Mafia.
“How about school? Don’t you plan on going—”
“No.” Jungkook ruthlessly cut you off. The move didn’t deter you from speaking your mind, though.
“Why not? You only need to finish two semesters to graduate. It’s a pity you’re settling with just this.”
“Just what?” Jungkook raised his brow, irritation flaring up. He had a hunch of what you were implying.
Sure enough, you swallowed hard to cover your nervousness. “With this…I mean…dropouts are…” You struggled to find the right words to say.
Jungkook huffed, supplying the words for you. “…are what? Stupid? Lazy? Unambitious? Or a waste of time?”
“Oi, don’t put words into my mouth.” You hissed, getting pissed off too.
“But that’s what you wanted to say, right? You think lowly of me. You’re just like the rest of them.”
Jungkook heard all kinds of snide remarks when he dropped out of university. His adviser even called him a lost cause— that he would never be successful if he didn’t finish school.
  Bullshit.
Jungkook felt acid crawling up to his throat. “People like you think you’re above everyone just cause you have a degree, right? Arrogant.”
You lost your composure because of how hurtful he was being.
“So what if I’m arrogant!?” You dropped your chopsticks, no longer in the mood to eat. “I’ve earned a degree. I’m finished with my commitment, unlike you, who quit and only settled with faking smiles and licking the butt holes of people richer than you!”
“You--!” Jungkook clenched his fist. He always knew his best friend had a sharp mouth. You said things that made sense, but damn, they hurt. This wasn’t the first time you said something biting, but it was the first time you had hurt Jungkook’s feelings.
It was too late when you realized what you had said. Jungkook’s eyes were already red. You knew Jungkook hated fake pleasantries and wooing greedy businessmen, yet you used those things as a weapon to hurt him.
Truly a low blow.
“Screw you.” Jungkook spat before storming off.
Feeling defeated, you didn’t run after him, deciding to just go home alone and leave Jungkook to cool off.
But the following day, you found yourself standing in front of Jungkook’s apartment. The thing about you was you couldn’t bear fighting for real with your best friend. Bickering with him was fine, but you’d rather die than really hurt Jungkook.
You rang the doorbell. It was early in the morning. 4am. Every second that passed knowing you and Jungkook were not okay was like a stab in your heart.
Surely, Jungkook had calmed down. If he hadn’t, you would accept any kind of punishment. You just wanted to see him.
“Come on.” You pressed the doorbell once again. It never took Jungkook two rings to open the door for you, so you seriously considered breaking in.
But to your delight, the door swung open before you could do something stupid.
“What is it?” Stone cold voice hit you on the face.
A lot. You wanted to convey many things, such as apologizing and saying Jungkook had misunderstood your point. However, looking at your best friend’s still angry face left you no choice but to lower your eyes. Your heart felt like it was pricked by thousands of needles.
You knew you were in the wrong. You could only raise the paper bag you were holding.
“I made crab spring rolls. Do you want them?”
“What makes you think I want them?” Jungkook crossed his arms, which caused you to swallow hard.
You bit your lip too, looking at Jungkook despite your guilt. “You’re right, you might not want them anymore, but I can only bring this hoping you’d accept my apology and also...also to—”
You weren’t planning to bring this up while still outside Jungkook’s home, but you couldn’t bear to look at his angry face anymore.
You voiced out your trump card. Your last resort. “—to ask you if you’re willing to guide me on investing at Bighit?”
As expected, Jungkook was shocked. His lips parted wide. “Why? You don’t mind licking butt holes with me?”
“Oh, for Fuck’s sake!” You pushed the paper bag into Jungkook’s chest. “I was wrong, okay? I’m an arrogant devil. ”
You craned your neck, purposely showing off the choker adorning your neck.
Fire danced in Jungkook’s eyes. He lowered the paper bag to cover the bulge in his sweatpants.
Fucking hell, you’re so hot. Jungkook scolded himself, forced to contour his expression to neutral.
“Then what are you waiting for? Come in.”
Needless to say, you left Jungkook’s apartment feeling grateful that you had a choker to cover some obvious bite marks.
Present, 2023:
“Pwetty lady! Spring yoll! Bin-bin! Want!” A certain someone was banging the top of ADA’s table, almost as if he couldn’t wait for even one more second.
“Hey, kiddo. You already ate seven pieces.” You folded your arms across your chest, your brows furrowing at the small child sitting before you.
The said the child pouted his lips, his eyes losing their sparks.
Jungkook’s sparkling eyes were still vivid in your mind, probably because you had just finished reminiscing about what had happened five years ago. As a result, you couldn’t help but associate this kid with your former best friend.
You always thought that Jungkook’s eyes could replace the stars. It was your weakness. Those eyes made you want to dig your heart out and give it to Jungkook for free. The universe knew about this, so why must you suffer it the second time?
Why did Soobin, the kid in front of you, have to have the same sparkly eyes as Jungkook?
“Spring roll! Want!” They even had the same favorite food.
You scoffed. Like father like son, huh?
“A brat dares to make demands when he can’t pronounce the words right? Spring yoll, my ass.” You mocked the kid.
Soobin ignored you. He continued banging on the table.
“Spring yoll! Bin-bin! Want! Spring yoll!”
“Okay, fine. I’ll buy you more. Just you wait, young master.” You playfully rolled your eyes, giving in to the request of your adoptive son.
“Is it that good?” You took one piece of spring roll. It had been many years since you last tasted this. Back then, you’d rather have Jungkook eat them all.
“Good! Very good!” Soobin stuffed another piece inside his mouth, clearly enjoying it.
The kid was right. The crab spring roll was delicious. It tasted the same way it did five years ago. You unconsciously gripped your phone, fixing your gaze on the screen as if waiting for a New Year’s miracle.
But it never came.
Last night, you met up with Jungkook, hoping to talk to him. Unexpectedly, Jungkook was drunk.
Now that he was sober, you thought he would call.
What wishful thinking.
“But nothing’s changed.” You thought to yourself as you looked around the place. ADA was still open for business; its famous spring rolls were still loved by many. Even Natsume was still singing across the street. The only difference was that you couldn’t hear the old man singing.
ADA expanded its business. They now had alfresco dining. You chose to eat inside the restaurant, afraid Soobin would catch a cold.
Everything stayed the same except for people. Back then, you went to ADA with your best friend. Years later, you went to ADA with your former best friend’s kid.
You could only swallow the bitterness down your stomach.
“Full! Wanna go home! Sleep!” Soobin said after eating the last piece of spring roll.
You hummed, “We’ll go home in a while. Count one to one hundred first.”
Soobin threw dirty looks at you as if to say, “This young master doesn’t know how to count!” You laughed a little. Of course, he couldn’t count up to a hundred yet. He was still so young.
So young.
But someone had already missed a few years of Soobin’s life.
You looked at your phone again.
Still no call.
“Alright, Bin-bin. Let’s go home.”
At last, you and your son left the food shop. As you two walked out, the horrible singing voice of the fortune teller reached your ears.
His lyrics were as nasty as before. Soobin covered his ears in annoyance, asking you to walk faster as he didn’t want to hear Natsume sing:
ring, ring, ring
the phone rings
the boy saw black
and the girl saw red
ring, ring, ring
the phone rings
how cruel it is
to have you waiting
for someone who can’t
 even
breathe.
****
←Previous Chapter (02) | Next Chapter (04) →
A/N: comments motivate me to write. leave some if you can ~~ ❤️
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End Game 4
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No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, stalking, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: Your gaming buddy asks to meet up but it doesn’t go exactly as planned.
Characters: Andy Barber
Note: I'm a sleepy babay.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.
I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖
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There’s a finality to the tap of your thumb. You hold the block button for a moment before you let it go. The window pops up asking if you’re sure. Yes. Certain. This is just a mistake and when you’re older and wiser, you’ll be thankful you made it. If you even remember it. 
You lay back and put your phone down. Done. Over. No more Jacob. No Andy.  
Maybe you’ll go back and see Kara again, or she can come here, even if she hates this town. You can at least be thankful that it reconnected you two, and you have to be grateful to learn a hard lesson. Don’t mess with strangers online. You’re better off alone. 
You close your eyes. You’re exhausted. Mentally, emotionally, and yes, physically. Who knew scooping ice cream could be so much work? 
When you wake up, you’re sore and still groggy. The sun peers in at you brightly in the slat between the curtains. You groan and hide under the pillow. Your shift starts at noon. You can’t spend all morning doing nothing or the whole day is wasted. 
You drag yourself out of bed. Your grandma is still asleep. You’re sure she was up until dawn with her latest haul from the used book store. You clean up the cluster of wrappers around her chair and tidy up the kitchen, dumping the old coffee and brewing a new pot. 
You go to grab your phone and pause as you see an unusual notification. Your email? Huh. You don’t really use that besides for school. You open it up, thinking it might be about enrolment. No. It’s him. Andy. Holy moly. 
You scroll up and down, skimming the blocks of text. Oh god. You hit delete. You’re not reading all that. You said what needed to be said. 
You have your coffee and load the machine for whenever your mother gets out of bed. You eat and wash up, catching up on some Youtube before you make yourself get your uniform on. You head out, walking to work to enjoy the sunshine, and key in between tying on your apron and chatting with Gavin, the high schooler who does half-shifts every now and then.  
He leaves at four and you have your complimentary cone just after five. Peanut butter chocolate; classic. You eat at the window as you watch the mostly empty street. Your phone vibrates and you slide it out, hoping to take advantage of the lull. 
WhatsApp request? No way. The shammy recruiters always want a piece of you. At least you never fell for that. 
You bite into the cone and your phone suddenly blows up with Insta notifications. Bots! Ugh. So annoying. Every new follower is faceless with some generated name. You mute the notifications and put your cell away. You really are a boring person. 
As you look up, tires crush over a patch of gravel and your barely catch a glimpse of the car as it rolls just around the corner. You feel like you’ve missed something. Maybe your grandma is right about you always having your nose buried in a screen. Who is she to talk? She lives in her novels. 
Your shift ends at eight. You lock up and stop by the convenience store down the block. Nothing special, just a tray of carbonara you can shove in the nuke. As you pay at the counter, the door chimes to signal another customer. You accept your meagre meal as the other patron strides into the aisle. You don’t look over as you go directly for the door. You’re starving for more than a scoop. 
Your footsteps seem to echo through the dull streets. The frozen meal makes your hand hurt as your other holds your cell phone close. You text Kara as you finally get through the essay she wrote about Calvin’s latest antics. You wish you could convince her to play something. You feel aimless without an analog stick under your thumb. 
There’s a scuff, close behind you, loud enough to make you jump. You fumble with your phone and glance over your shoulder. You don’t see anything but the thick oak outside Luella’s. Ugh. Alright, you need to eat and lay down. It hasn’t been a busy day but still a long one. 
You pass through your grandma’s front door. She’s where she always is, in her chair, but something’s off. Something’s different. The smell of pollen hangs in the air and a pot stands on the coffee table with several white orchids tall in the soil. You frown. The last time you got her flowers, she didn’t even put them in a vase. 
“Oh, those are pretty,” you say. 
“Mph, not mine,” she grumbles, not looking up. 
“Not... who’s...” 
“Delivery man said your name. I didn’t read the card. I’m not a snoop.” 
You nod, thankful at least that she isn’t nosy. You go to the table and examine the pot. Who would send you flowers? 
You take the card off the tall pronged stick and open the envelope. You slide out the paper and unfold it. 
‘I know I’ve told you a million times, so I’ll show you how sorry I am instead. Yours always, Andy.’ 
You nearly drop your handful. Your eyes flick up to the pot and you have to stop yourself from pushing it off the table. What the hell? How... how does he know where you live? You never even mentioned what town you’re from. He only knows your college and it’s so small, he wouldn’t have heard of it. 
It’s enough to unsettle you. That he knows where you live is bad enough but the flowers themselves make a point. It’s not over. He’s not walking away but what else can you say to make him? Didn’t he get it? You think were pretty nice considering. 
“You got some boy?” Your grandma raises her eyes from the page. You can’t remember the last time she even bothered looking at you. 
“Not exactly,” you tuck the card away and put it in your pocket. “I’m going to make my dinner.” 
“Eh,” she grumbles, “fine. Get them flowers somewhere else. They stink.” 
You lift the vase, hugging it around the pot, and carry it from the room. You balance it against your hip and go into the kitchen. You use your free hand to pull open the freezer and put the pasta inside. You’re not so hungry anymore. 
🎮
The irises are pretty. The pot they came in is fancy, probably expensive. It underlines once more the gap between you and the real Jacob. Between you and Andy.
It only reminds you of how ridiculous you must have sounded. So, you just can’t understand why he’s doing this? Why is he still trying? For you? A girl with dwindling hopes of even finishing her low-tier college degree. 
You try to forget. You don’t have a shift that day but you can’t just sit around. Usually, you would. You’d hole up in your bedroom and play video games. Not anymore. He ruined that. You’re disappointed you’re letting him. 
You got down to the library for a while and wander around. There’s nothing there you’re very interested in. They still haven’t got the latest release in the series you’d read in high school. Oh well, you’ll wait around until one day you learn the fate of those revolutionary spies. 
You walk the main strip of the town. It isn’t very extensive. There’s a coffee shop and the used bookstore which also carries hobby supplies. There’s the same diner that’s been there since you were a kid and the interchangeable business that open and close year after year. 
There’s a vibe in your pocket. It’s not Kara. Another WhatsApp request, more Insta bots, and Discord. You haven’t been on the server in ages. You couldn’t keep up with all the channels and most of it was arguing about mining strategies. 
It’s Andy. Frig. You should’ve blocked him there too. You just hadn’t thought of it. 
‘Did you like the flowers?’ 
You don’t answer but he’ll see that you read it. It isn’t long before he’s typing. 
‘I am still very sorry. I wish you’d talk to me. Hear me out.’ 
Hear him out? He said everything. His son is dead and he lied to you. That’s not anything you can hash out. 
‘I know you’re not working today. I’ll make a new world and we can chat there.’ 
No. That’s not going to happen. Over. O-V-E-R. It’s done. You’re not going to be like Kara. When you cut the cord, it’s snipped. 
You won’t answer. That’s just bait. He’ll keep nibbling if you do that. You press the chat settings and block. That’s better, you can’t breathe. 
You put your phone on silent and back in your pocket. You wish you had the money to try the sushi place. It won’t last long in the bodunk town so you probably won’t ever get to. Oh well. Back on campus, they sell decent California rolls at the cafeteria. Decent, not necessarily good. 
You go home. To your grandma’s house. It doesn’t always feel like home. You know she’s counting the days until you leave. You are too. 
You wish you were brave enough to apologise. To say sorry your mom and dad didn’t want you. That she got stuck with you. It feels like saying it out loud would be worse. Just wallow in the unspoken resent, one day you won’t ever come back and maybe then you can both be happy. 
In your room, you don’t know what to do with yourself. Your Switch taunts you from across the room. You want to mine or race or even scare yourself with some Hellblade. You can’t. More Youtube. More wasted time. That’s what people like you do; people from small towns with no one who loves them and no money; waste time. 
The mindless videos help you relax but not forget. You just can’t get rid of the little tickle at the back of your head. There’s a tinge of shame that remains and a sliver of guilt. It will go. It has to, one day. 
You catch yourself staring at the orchid. You can smell it. You want to throw it away but that feels rude. Even if Andy would never know, even if you shouldn’t care. He hurt you, didn’t he? He lied. Well, you could give it to Mahalia next door, she loves flowers. 
You lay in indecision. You don’t want to do anything but lay there. Now that you’re still, you have no strength. Your day off is chipped away in your laziness.  
The next day awaits you with another shift at the booth. And the day after and the day after. 
Your fourth day in a row and you get a new Discord message. You know even before you open it, even by the blank avatar and nondescript username. It’s him. Just leave me alone. Let it go. Let me forget. 
‘I know you don’t want to hear from me but I need you to hear me. I can’t stop thinking of you and what happened. I can do better. Please, let me apologise.’ 
Blocked. Again.
Work. Again.  
You’re half asleep as you fill cones with soft serve. You smile and swallow yawns, faking it for the hyper children and cheerful couples. 
When it slows, you work on cleaning the freezer, switching out empty containers with ones from the deep freeze. As you check the soft serve, there’s a tap on the open walk-up window. Oh shoot. You should’ve been paying better attention. 
You turn back to greet the next customer but as you approach the window, your chest deflates. Frozen, like the tubs around you. You stare at Andy as he smiles at you. He wears a short-sleeve button up with blue, grey, and white stripes. His hair blows in the soft breeze. 
“Do you have butterscotch ripple?” He asks brightly. 
You blink and hesitate. You don’t know what to do. How did he get here? How did he find you? Why is he here? 
You reach for the window and before he can stop you, you shut it. You lock it from the inside and step back. His face falls and his brow arches as he stands straight. He says your name, his voice muffled by the glass, and puts his palm to the barrier. 
“Please,” he begs. 
You shake your head and turn your back to him. If your manager was here, you’d be in shit. That’s a no-no. Never turn away a customer, only shut the window when you lock up. 
You ignore him and go back to tidying. There could be a line up out there but you don’t care. Your hands are shaking and it’s not just the temperature.
You just can’t believe he’s there. You can’t believe he won’t just give up. You don’t want to believe it because you’re afraid. You’re terrified and he seems entirely clueless about how scary he’s being. 
Flowers are one thing but showing up at your job? That’s a flaming red flag that even you can see. Not only because you told him plainly that you don’t want to talk to him again, but because he’s a grown man. Fortysomething and he can’t take a hint. Why would a man his age want to talk to someone as young as you? That’s another red flag on its own. As if catfishing you wasn’t enough. 
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vintagelacerosette · 3 days
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Wednesday tag game
Hiii darling angelpies! I am here on timeish 😆
I was tagged by these dazzling sweethearts Nosho @creepkinginc Mel @gardenerian Evie @energievie Deanna @deedala Kat @ mybrainismelted Julia @blue-disco-lights Al @spookygingerr Jessica @guinguin1984
How did you get into the fandom?
Like a lot of us 😆 I saw a fan edit of Mickey & Ian on YouTube (I can't find it again even when I've searched my history 😭) I was kinda in between fandoms at the time with Malex from Roswell New Mexico but they were broken up at the time & buddie lol.
But then I was shot through the heart when I went through the gallavich tag & it felt like home 🥰
How long have you been here?
I was lurking at the end of 2021 & the first official time I contributed to this darling fandom in Feb 2022 with gallacrafts 💝
What's the first fandom channel you found? (youtube, reddit, tumblr, insta, twitter, FB, other?)
Here on tumblr babeeeyy
What's your favourite now?
Still tumblr but I wish I was better on discord 😅 I get overwhelmed & don't wanna talk over ppl 😔
Which mutual have you known the longest in the fandom?
Oh my goodness I had no idea but my longest mutual is the always spectacular Calli @callivich 🥰🩵💙 woooww!!
Which tumblerinos did you have your first fandom crush(es) on and wanted to get to know?
Y'all have to understand you are all unbelievably swoon worthy & there's only so many ppl I can tag in one post (damn you tagging limit 😣)
Ok, so definitely have a big crush on Deena @suzy-queued & to see smitten feeling is mutual got me
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GIF by theresaphoenixinmyboot
Alice @darthvaders-wife Jane @captainjowl Mitch @psychicskulldamage when we became mutuals I squealed bc how much talent??
Jenna @ianrightsonly & Kay @goodkwuestion their fics changed me
Also, Benja @svltburn | Nosho | Vey @look-i-love-u Macy @heymacy Julissa @heymrspatel Jo @jomilky Harvey @mikhailoisbaby Georgia @iansw0rld Molly @deathclassic Stas @messedwithmandy Howl @howlinchickhowl Michelle @michellemisfit | Deanna | LJ @ofalltheginjoints Sam @sam-loves-seb Face @ burninface | Calli | AJ @ clingymickey Mills @gallavichsbitch Leah @whatwouldmickeydo
Also Jay!! You've left but gave me butterflies 🦋
Pls I kind hate this question! I've come to the conclusion I have a crush on you all OK?? 😭
This is why I make y'all Valentine's
First gallavich fan fic you read (or that blew you away that you remember)?
By the magnificent Kay The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Ian Gallagher!!! OH MY GOSH JUST THINKING ABOUT THIS FIC MAKES ME FEEL ELATED & FERAL!!! It's my favourite piece of written work & I need my non gallavich ppl to read it so I can scream into their faces how much I love it 🥰🩷🩷🩷
First fan art that blew your mind?
Seriously, Deena's gallacrafts & art always take my breath away!!! Like the artistry & creativity?? I wanna get to your level 🥰
It's three dimensional & has twinkling lights ✨️ I was astounded & my jaw literally dropped 😍
All of Alice's art especially my commissioned art 🩷
Also, Mitch's comic I stared at it forever like Ian's eyes reflecting Mick's booty 🍑👀
Fanfic trope that you were sure wasn't for you but now you low key (or high key) love?
I have read some pretty freaky & nasty fic bc of curiosity, so I nothing really gave me icks in tropes, but in writing style, I got turned around with Jen @wehangout with second person POV. You're so talented that I really enjoyed them when I would nope out before 😆
What surprised you most about this fandom?
Everything surprised me about this fandom bc it was my first one!! 😆 I didn't really know how to do tumblr & didn't really get how to interact. So I used tumblr like a sticker book, then came learning tags & so ppl reached out to me which helped me gain confidence haha
This is kinda a golden standard fandom. So welcoming, loving & encouraging!! If I ever dabble in another fandom, imma have a high standard bc I've been spoiled by y'all! ILY
Moment in the show (or YT vids if you're one of those) that you fell in hyperfixation with gallavich?
It was the "I'm fucking gay" scene to the "Guess what we've been doing daddy" The way he humps the car with all that conviction & screaming "he fucking loves it".
Everything clicked & I was like "Damn I love this fictional man." He is my favourite character of all time & this ship is my OTP & GOAT.
Also I love this edit too. It gives me chills
youtube
Ian or Mickey?
Mickey, but holy shit I love them both
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Which gallagher or milkovich are you?
I took a page from @/guinguin1984 & did some quizzes & I got Fiona Ian Fiona Debbie not of them feel right ahaha
I guess Fiona bc I had her twice 😅
Consider yourself tagged if I have a crush on you or mentioned you. Also tagging these sunshines & if you wanna do it too, have at it 💛🥰
@lingy910y @mickittotheman @doshiart @crossmydna @y0itsbri @7x10mickey @whatthebodygraspsnot @ms-moonlight-inn @mmmichyyy @sickness-health-all-that-shit @kiinard @transmickey @gallawitchxx @sleepyheadgallavich @rereadanon @whaticameherefor @darlingian @andthatisnotfake @ian-galagher @francesrose3
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thatfuckinjester · 2 days
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hello i'm sad and making it everyone's problem
thanks to @cirrus-ghoulette for organizing whumpmonth!! also i'm using @wrathofrats beautiful dividers!!
Day Six: Phobia
oh and btw there's like flashbacks to phantom's past as a human here but he himself doesn't remember any of it, like it's just because i felt like it
TW: hospitals, death, abuse, threats, vomit/throwing up, running away, kinda suicide attempt. please if i missed something tell me
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"Phantom?" Someone, the others said his name is Omega, called.
Phantom was sitting in the waiting room of the infirmary, his hands trembling from reasons he can't explain, doesn't know.
"Phantom?" The giant ghoul called again, titling his head sideway to look at him from more than just the corner of his eyes.
Phantom didn't want to respond, or maybe he just couldn't.
He felt sick.
"Phantom?" Again. He can't do it, he just can't.
He was just a kid. Or well, as much as you can be a kid when you're twelve.
The waiting room of the hospital was crowded. He didn't like when there were that many people around him.
But he made a promise, he had to keep it.
His hands are trembling in his lap. Is it wrong that he wished he wasn't so young out of nowhere? That maybe he could understand why he woke up to screaming? That maybe he'll understand why they're at the hospital now? Usually they won't allow him to get away with skipping school. Why ate they here?
He looks back at his lap.
His hands keep trembling when Mother stands up, Father keeps walking around aimlessly, knocking into people and getting mad.
He saw them mad before, but he doesn't understand this.
"xxxxxxx" Someone called him, he can't look up.
"xxxxxxx" Again with his name. He refuse to look up.
Maybe it's because he knows what's going on, what's going to come out of Father's mouth.
Maybe it's because he made a promise to always protect his little sibling.
Maybe it's because he failed.
"xxxxp- -Tom?"
Phantom finally looks at Omega, the giant ghoul at his eye level, something unfamiliar on his face.
"Are you okay?" He asked softly, and how didn't phantom noticed his hand holding his face softly?
Phantom shrugged, and then just because he felt bad for all of whatever this is gave a smile, "Why wouldn't I be okay?"
"..." Omega didn't answer, instead he stood up and stretched his arms out, Phantom kinda missed his touch but it's okay, it doesn't matter much.
"Do you really want to work here? You know that you don't have to, right?"
"Well if I'm a quint, shouldn't I?"
"You're sweet. What if you try something else for a little bit? Just to see if you'll like something else better?"
"But-"
"Don't worry, it's okay," And Omega's smile was maybe everything Phantom ever hoped for.
"I know exactly who could use another set of hands."
Ifrit is nice, talks a lot, Phantom likes it.
Ifrit is easy to understand. He's the day. It's pretty nice because Phantom isn't that different than him, but still is.
Phantom likes to think of himself more like the night type. Or maybe he just hasn't slept for way too long again.
"I like da way ya work." Ifrit said, he always say those stupid things that make Phantom happy.
"I think dat today ya're ready to see da furnace, what do ya say?"
"Yeah," Phantom said, and maybe it wasn't that enthusiastic, so he nodded as well just to get the point across.
He would love to see the furnace.
"Ya're cute ya know? Really." Ifrit smiled, Phantom hoped his tail wasn't wagging behind him. Or at least not enough for Ifrit to notice.
"Wha'd'ya say we go out there hm? We can come back 'fore the strom if we hurry."
"Yeah. Let's go." Phantom said, knowing well that Ifrit already noticed his tail, maybe he can pass it as enthusiasm to see the furnace.
But thinking back, maybe he wasn't ready.
Maybe it was just-
Fire.
There's something addicting to it,
xxxxxxx hates it.
They were sitting somewhere in the forest, Father going around, mumbling stuff to himself, everything that used to belong to his little sibling was burnt, the smell making xxxxxxx want to vomit.
Father kicked it all, jets of fire flying around before fading away.
He's so sick.
"Get in the car." Father said, already walking ahead. He couldn't say no, there was no other way back home.
The car drive is quite.
xxxxxxx doesn't even know why he decided to speak, but he had to.
"Are you mad at me?" He asked, Father's faced twitched.
"No." He answered in a tone that obviously meant yes. xxxxxxx swallowed around the lump in his throat.
"It's all good xxxxxxx! Of course I stayed with you, the fucking fuck up! What fo you think? Do you think I'm mad at you?" The car kept speeding.
"I can just crash us hear, what do you think? Would you go to hell kr heaven if you die? You killed...." And he just kept speeding up more and more and more and-
Phantom vomited at the smell of burning. Ifrit looked so sad, Phantom never ever meant to make him sad, to disappoint.
So he rans.
He rans and rans, he speeds up similarity to how a car would.
Phantom liked how comforting it was in the greenhouse, the smell of everything was just else. Better.
And he definitely didn't lay down there, behind a table, and just looked at the sky as the drip-drip-drip of the rain was getting stronger and stronger.
Phantom likes the rain.
He doesn't know why he's so terrified of everything around him, why just sitting in the infirmary hurt him, why just smelling something burnt made him so sick. He doesn't know why he's so wrong.
He likes the rain, it's nice, comforting, quite.
At least it's not storming. He doesn't know really what it is that he have against storms because his whole body is scarred with lighting like shapes.
Maybe there's just... Something is so very wrong with him.
He isn't supposed to walk around at night like that, all fake confidence. But does it matters? Does anything matter?
It's supposed to rain, to storm, they said, xxxxxxx hopes it will. He wishes it, prays to whoever is willing to listen.
And maybe laying in the middle of a road is the worst decision he's made, but what can even happen? He has no house to return to, he already wrote the letter, it's left on the table so maybe when his parents notice that he's gone they'll read it.
He left it unmarked, only a few words in there, nothing that will really say where he is, what he's doing, or why.
Just that when they will wake up they won't see him again.
Just that he's really sorry for the letter.
xxxxxxx closed his eyes, the warm road under him kind of rumbling, the sky night whipped in a blast of light from the lightning and he's already dreaming.
And when the thunder reaches his ears..
Phantom whines.
Fuck. Fuck it all.
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tripleglitchwriting · 23 hours
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My earthspark Season 2a thoughts
Warning: SPOILERS FOR THE WHOLE THING!!! And a lot of rambling. And negative thoughts.
As much as i hate to admit it, I was kind of disappointed. It’s not that it was bad, I did still enjoy it, but I feel like there was so much missed opportunity.
The show wasn’t well advertised for, especially season 2. I have a feeling Hazbro doesn’t really care much for it. I think the team that works on the show is great! They’re obviously very talented, passionate, and hardworking, but (so far) season 2 saw a definite downgrade from season 1.
The animation is the first thing that comes to mind. While it is still tv show quality, when compared to season 1 in some parts it feels clankier and less polished. Though I don’t know much about 3D animation other than it’s hard, so I suppose I can’t really critique something I have no practice in.
Then I come to the characters. Here I see the seasons biggest flaw. Starscream’s character arc got completely obliterated, (though they did at least mention his interaction with Hashtag) Nightshade got sidelined compared to the other terrans, and Breakdowns character arc also got the boot.
Breakdown interacted with Bumblebee once, and it was in the finale while they were fighting in the background. If it were just this plotline that got pushed off, I would be fine with it. It’s hard to fit in every single character thread in 9 episodes while also introducing new things. Except it wasn’t just this.
In season 1 they set up the perfect redemption arc for Starscream. Him finally meeting someone that actually listens to him, Megatron’s past abuse and Starscream feelings about his subsequent redemption, it was really interesting to see! But then he pulled a Steeljaw and decided to make New Cybertron. Character wise, sure, I can see why he would want to do that. However, it totally disregards his past interactions. We don’t even know how he found out about the titan, there are so many missing pieces.
Then there’s Cosmos. I think Cosmos is great! I think it’s cool that his voice is Weird Al! I was so excited to get to the next episode and see him take Robbie’s offer to join team Terran and the autobots… and then we don’t see him again. They even set up a potential conflict with Megatron being redeemed! And then nothing! My theory is they couldn’t afford weird al for another episode. Maybe he’ll be back in 2b?
Personally, I don’t like the chaos terrans. It’s an interesting concept, and it isn’t executed as poorly as it could’ve been, but they just fell below the bar for me.
Aftermath has one character trait and it’s hitting things. For the start of his character, that’s fine! Having him only see value in destruction is an interesting foil to Jawbreaker and the rest of the terrans. However, even after the episode with him and Jawbreaker, he doesn’t change. He steals the cave water (which, by the way, how do they get fuel now???? Does it come back???) and goes back to being terrible. I can see what they were trying to do with him, it’s cool having a character that was made to be evil go up against characters who try and Steven universe anybody that shows a hint of the possibility to change. But there’s just nothing interesting about Aftermath. They don’t even dive into his relationship with Breakdown that much after his debut episode.
And then there’s Spitfire. I have mixed feelings about her. On one hand, shes pretty much the shape the hedgehog of transformers. She’s the mean edgy version of an already established ‘good’ character who is designed to be better than said already established good character. On its own that’s pretty overdone, and so is the body switch troupe. It’s a good hook but super predictable. She’s more interesting than Aftermath, at least she has a reason to stay evil, but she just feels like a plot device to create conflict rather than an actual well-formed character. Maybe that’s what she is? On the other hand, her debut episode is really well directed! It was some fantastic shots and combat sequences! I absolutely love what they did with that! The fact she nearly killed Wheeljack was really surprising (in a good way) to me! It even played to Wheeljack character by having him be the first to figure her out!
A good amount of the episodes were as well directed as episode 6. They have a lot of good moments! Some I even laughed out loud at! It may just be the fact only half the season is out, but really 2a felt a bit empty. We got no new characters other than Cosmos (who had like 10 lines and then dipped) the chaos terrans, and the fairmiestero. There were a lot of missed opportunities in that department and in the department of pre existing characters.
Nothing new about Megatron (though I did enjoy the part we got to explore cybertronian culture with the polyhex tournament!) and no comebacks of older characters (where is prowl).
I thought the quintesson lore was pretty interesting though! They will probably be the villains of 2b. I still have hope for the series. They could right a lot of wrongs with the next part of season 2. I sincerely hope these loose ends get tied up.
I’m tired, I have more to say but the energy to type it all out is not there. I also didn’t proofread this so sorry if it’s just rambling and spelling mistakes haha.
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request a prompt (nsfw edition [ii])
we did it babes. we hit 444; and its all thanks to y’all! have a look at what mamaz has prepared for you this time ;).
note: I will only be doing 15 total of these prompts this time around. you can send as many as you like (during the last special, a lot of people requested the same number for the same person, and I imagine it’s going to be pretty similar this time around, which is why I will be picking 15 — more than likely, yours will be picked simply going off of the statistics of last time) and after one day, I will close off the reqs. have fun y’all!
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oh, and you may notice that this time around, there’s two different lists. that is because one is for dialogue prompts, and the other is general nsfw prompts — just like with the last special, you can mix and match these prompts together (meaning, you can mix a general and a dialogue together if you wish; and there’s some new dialogue prompts here too) I just wanted to spice it up a bit!
↳ dialogue prompts.
1. “forget the bed… let’s do it right here.”
2. “here, let me show you how to do it.”
3. “home is too far away. no one’s going to see us here."
4. “I don’t have to be inside you to make you feel good…”
5. “I think you deserve a treat.”
6. “I want to see those pretty little lips wrapped around my cock.”
7. “I want you to fill me.”
8. “I wanna fuck you right up against the window.”
9. “If I’d known how much you liked to be watched I would’ve invited him/her/them sooner.”
10. “if we get caught, I’m blaming you.”
11. “if you don’t like my teasing, then why are you moaning?”
12. “is this sofa strong enough for both of us?"
13. “I’ll do anything you want me to do to you, but you have to say it out loud.”
14. “just sit back and let me give you a show.”
15. “keep doing that, and I’ll cum in no time.”
16. “lay back and touch yourself. I want to watch.”
17. “leave your hand there, sweetheart, it feels good."
18. “let’s do it in the bathroom, you can be as messy as you want.”
19. “let’s sneak in and do it there.”
20. “looks like someone wants to be a dad/mom.”
21. “make sure I won’t be able to walk tomorrow.”
22. “my cum’s dripping out, let me push it back in you.”
23. “someone’s happy to see me."
24. “stop undressing me with your eyes and start using your teeth.”
25. “swallow. all of it.”
26. “that’s a nice way to start a day”
↳ general prompts.
a. breeding
b. sixty-nine
c. face-sitting
d. overstimulation
f. edging
g. lingerie
h. daddy kink
i. threesome
j. with an audience
k. risky places
l. degradation
m. bondage
n. throat-fucking
o. spanking
p. thigh-riding
q. consensual somnophilia
r. slow and soft
s. first time
t. cock warming
u. mirror sex
v. corruption/training
w. phone sex
x. mutual masturbation
y. aphrodisiac
z. hate sex
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note: y’all don’t have to read this note here if you don’t want to, I just want to explain myself a little better. the reason I’m only going to be choosing 15 prompts is because I learned through my last special that if I try to complete every single one I get, I only stress myself out and put pressure on myself. and I want to iterate that the pressure and stress I feel is not on you all; y’all babes have been super duper patient with me (which I appreciate so very much, like, you have no idea) but I put pressure on myself. something that I have only learned very recently is that, as a writer, it’s very important to know your limits — both creativity wise and responsibility rise. (I’m also still behind on the prompts from the last special) my utmost goal is bring y’all the most top-notch, high quality, amazingly yummy fics, and it’s really difficult for me to do that when I put a shit ton of pressure on myself. trust me babes, I’d love nothing more than to write every single request you babes put in. but it’s just not possible for me; my limits don’t allow me to. I really hope this doesn’t cause any inconvenience for y’all. thank you so much for listening to me, babes <3 and for always supporting me. stay sexy, babes~
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