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#the touch starved and touch averse

lambsouvlaki · 4 months

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Jason gives the best hugs. It’s like if a weighted blanket was a person and also loved you. You are the burrito and he is the tortilla. Those arms are so big and strong and his jacket is nice and warm and perfect for snuggling under. If you’re short enough he’ll put his chin on your head and keep you tucked away nice and safe.

#jason todd #red hood #dc #jason todd x reader #fluff #he is touch averse so not many people know this #but he is also touch starved #and dying to get to hold you #grumpy dog energy

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fumifooms · 1 year

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Analysis of Laios’ succubus and theories on what it means - deep dive on Laios’ desires in human connections

Laios’ succubus is a very odd incident. I have some particular interpretations of why it was Marcille, and why things went down the way they did.

We know that a succubus shows what one desires, stated in canon as “an alluring form”; yes often in a romantic or sexual sense, as seen with Chilchuck’s succubus being entirely set on looks and seduction, meanwhile Marcille’s does have a focus on chivalrous noble demeanor as well, showing romantic behavior and personality. BUT with Izutsumi we also see that the liaison doesn’t have to be romantic or sexual at all, either, in Izutsumi’s case it’s a familial bond she craves. So perhaps we can say that the succubus exploits a desire based on connection, in whichever form that takes. Marcille wants an emotional connection foremost(which is also reflected in how it’s a character she knows very well and not a stranger. Perhaps romantic.), Chilchuck wants pleasure(a simple pleasure not unlike alcohol, perhaps such a connection is free of the more risky or unpleasant parts of a relationship, he doesn’t have to worry or to think and can just let himself go. Sexual.), Izutsumi wants a mother figure that can offer her warmth and comfort with who she doesn’t have to be tough (Familial), and I believe Laios’ is platonic and centered on his desire to have people with who he belongs and can be himself with…

But Laios’ case is more complex, it has layers. The thing is, even if Laios wanted to have someone able to turn him into a monster—which it didn’t even have to be, could straight up have just been a monster with such powers—, it didn’t have to be someone he knew. You could say the succubus wanted to disarm Laios’ suspicions with someone he knew and that was nearby, but the succubus seem very direct in every other case, simply appearing with someone’s greatest appearance even though both Marcille and Chilchuck were fully on guard and the succubi knew it. "Believability" isn’t an important factor. No, his succubus being someone he knew was important. It being Marcille was important.

There’s a TLDR at the end of this if you want to cut it short. For everyone else, strap in everyone, if you don’t know me hi I’m Fumi and I made this 3k words long analysis and theorizing bc I am autistic much like the character in question and I think this is both fascinating and has a lot to say. In this I offer both platonic and romantic reasonings and I do go rather in depth in Laios’ psychology and relationships to dissect what ever could this damn cryptic event MEAN. Spoilers for the succubus chapters obviously and also the last few arcs of the series so… Spoilers for the series as a whole!

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So attraction wise it’s kinda unsure where Laios stands. He does sort of logically list off aesthetically pleasing traits of the orc’s wives, but besides that… Not really, or he never voices it anyways. He and Marcille never share like “omg you’re pretty” moments or anything. Senshi gets more compliments than either of them through the series lmfao. Maybe Laios is asexual, maybe he simply doesn’t show outwardly his attraction much or even maybe isn’t self-aware about it, regardless… Laios HAS implied preference for Marcille’s looks in the past. With the orcs, he said that “tallmen like long ears”. Laios’ shapeshifter of Marcille has her hair down just like her succubus, which by Kui is explained to be because she had it down when she revived Falin and it really marked him, though it could also be interesting to see it as his mental image of her as her most authentic self, I’ve seen it theorized that it’s a preference too but I think that’s disproven. But of course the most damning evidence itself… The succubus scene. It could have been anyone else in the party, certainly Senshi shares Laios’ interest in monsters much more already. We shouldn’t discredit the way Laios was blushing madly once she revealed she was a monster, that made her more attractive to Laios for sure, but he still wouldn’t have reacted that way if it was just anyone. The contexts are very different, but we can compare it to how Laios reacted when Lycion turned into a wolf man in front of him for instance. Laios certainly doesn’t act that way with Izutsumi- and it’s confirmed like a page later that he does see Izutsumi as a monster already. AND!! Laios starts blushing madly BEFORE she says that she can turn him into a monster- and we can safely assume that the blush isn’t out of simple fluster but out of desire/infatuation since he clearly wants her to bite him in the next page and his blush does not relent at all.

There’s something we could say about Laios’ liking of Marcille being born out of companionship rather than aesthetic attraction, on familiarity and intimacy. As members of the same party they’ve spent a lot of time together and we’ve seen that Laios trusts in her and relies on her for her skillset and avice. If Laios’ interest in her developped more naturally and gradually, valuing the familiar bond they have, I don’t see why he’d be acting all blushy and lovesick every time they interact or whatever, which is the explanation I have for Marcille genuinely being Laios’ most alluring form but him not freezing at the sight of it. That could also be a reason why he physically rejects succubus!Marcille instinctively, because something about her feels off or different (which is sorta the most direct interpretation of the scene, since Laios’ first thought is that it can’t be Marcille and must be a monster).

[Edited in: Oh my god. The picture above is the last page of the dullahan chapter, chapter 57, a chapter that centers around Laios and Marcille’s relationship through flashbacks as Laios is on the brink of death and sees his life flashing before his eyes (he remembers how they first met, etc, which is also interesting to note that on the brink of death he reminisces about her the most). The last page of that chapter, more or less the thesis of the chapter in which we see Laios opens up about the real reason he and Falin go dungeon diving to her after them having a rough meeting but she turns out to also have an interest in dungeons, has Laios go "she starts out frowning but she ends up smiling! Wether its’s about eating monsters or about me :)”. That chapter is the one right before th succubus chapters. Laios’ most alluring form wasn’t “just” Marcille, it’s a SMILING Marcille. Which is why the succubus had such a weird and off demeanor right away (which gets knocked off once it doesn’t work and becomes a more Marcille-like Marcille)! It was only focused on smiling because it was the angle it was working from.

Oh my god it makes sense. It’s a direct narrative link, it’s as explicitly put with its story structure without Kui just stating it, besides, you know, the many times Laios says how precious her smile is to him. He’s like “I love her smile” and right next chapter the succubus is like “yes this is what he likes seeing most”. But… This also does mean that the focus might be less romantic, like Marcille’s significance doesn’t diminish, but then the alluring form might be less about her and more about the smile itself. About having a friend who looks at him like that, about someone who smiles after eating monster dishes or surpassing obstacles together… Or it can actually be so much more romantic. Like, maybe the smiling Marcille doesn’t work is because well, it’s not like Marcille, she wouldn’t just be smiling like that and behave like that (esp since his musing is about how her smiles are sort of “earned”, that she doesn’t smile right away but it’s sort of like a rewarding sight when she does). So then the most alluring form of Marcille doesn’t work because she doesn’t convincingly BEHAVE like her. His most alluring form isn’t a Marcille-lookalike, it’s her as a whole. More on the succubus shifting/switching in its approach later.]

Anyways.

Where was I. Ah yes, “It could have been anyone else in the party, certainly Senshi shares Laios’ interest in monsters much more already.” But then that’s the point isn’t it. I think Laios’ succubus being Marcille is because his wish isn’t so much focused on her, or on becoming a monster, but on not being alone. On being understood. On having others finally share his interest. On not only becoming a monster, but having someone to share that with. A trusted friend, a companion, or a lover, it matters little in my interpretation, the bedrock of it stays the same. And this is why it’d be someone he already knew instead of someone new, because it’d defeat the point, and it was maybe Marcille because she’s the most vocal about finding monsters disgusting: it’d have finally been a shift in her that she now liked monsters. And again this brings back to when he talks about her smile, when he says that she starts out unhappy with eating monsters, but ends up smiling by the end of it. Her smile itself represents that though first impression or reflexive dislike, someone can turn around and end up liking it anyways, it’s hope for his interests to be liked and perhaps for him to be lovable as well, that it’s possible to be accepted.

But I do think it would be a mistake to say that there’s absolutely no romantic interest, that it’s plainly platonic or another kind of interest misplaced and idealized in her. What we saw with the other succubus is that they 100% act in ways that the person desires, sure Izutsumi’s start attacking after a while, but that was after pushing them over the edge, and succubus Marcille wasn’t being agressive nor did she have a reason to be (even when she could have with Laios’ choking, she didn’t turn to violence, so she was 100% still in seduction mode). Ultimately the goal of the succubus is to make physical contact to be able to suck their essence, but the way they go about achieving that is tailored to the individual’s desire, Marcille’s kissed her hand and Izutsumi’s offered a hug. The succubus can identify and embody complex desires, often subconscious ones, shown with Izutsumi’s. They go straight to it without complex subterfuge either. Chilchuck’s succubi were very direct because that’s what he wanted, Marcille’s was courtly because that’s what she wanted, Izutsumi’s offered motherly comfort and affection because that’s what she wanted, and Laios’ is Marcille attempting to kiss him. Let that sink in.

Laios why are you choking the supposed key to your heart?

Ok so the theory that Laios’ desire is to have a deeper companionship from an existing companion is pretty tame and surface level I’d say, but strap in… The way Laios reacted violently to Marcille trying to kiss him is VERY interesting. The first thing he thinks about is that she isn’t Marcille so she must be a succubus, then confusion at to why it’s her. He’s even afraid of what the others would think, feeling… Shame? With how he imagines Marcille would be horrified that he likes her that way. Fear of rejection?

But no no, what interests me is the shift that the succubus makes. It seemed very confident at first, went straight in, but when overpowered shifted the direction it was going in- shifted from a desire for Marcille to a desire for a monster Marcille and whatever deeper desire that hides. But??? Succubi did not make mistakes as to what someone wanted thus far, possibly that has never ever happened before by human records. Could the succubus truly have miscalculated what Laios desires? It’d be hard to imagine that the succubus would misunderstand what type of companionship someone wished for or what approach to take, since it’s done complex cases before too, Izutsumi being very much in denial before it & at first. In Izutsumi’s case, even with her complex feelings over it and her two souls desiring different things, the succubus did not miss its mark, and ultimately it was having a second soul for who the succubus wasn’t alluring that allowed her not to be frozen to the spot. But with Laios the succubus fully switches strategy.

The thing is that succubi don’t usually need to switch strategies, because the form and approach they take always work and always leave the victim frozen. Izutsumi bypassed this because of her two souls, but was still frozen and struggling to reject the succubus at first. And yet? Laios did. A succubus’ victim is supposed to be instantly frozen, and yet Laios acts on instinct and defensively agressive as soon as his reaction time allows. And well, it’s hard to really come to a logical conclusion as to why, since we have no idea of what rules can override a succubus’ temptation besides multiple souls… C’mon regular Marcille can’t be the winged lion/kenksuke’s desire bc of the loose hair being Laios’ mind-Marcille we’ve gone over this /hj Although, since it’s confirmed that the winged lion was watching with the dream Laios gets induced right after, maybe he’s what allowed Laios to be moving? It’s possible that it’d have frozen him otherwise, even if Laios with his full rationale wouldn’t have accepted the kiss faced with supernatural allure he might have gotten paralysis from being overwhelmed, similarly to how if Chilchuck had his full rationale he wouldn’t allow a woman like his succubus to kiss him (he’s always stayed faithful to his wife even after 4 years of separation, give the guy his earned credit). Getting somewhat offtopic, but something to say about how if that’s the case once again the theme of ‘irrational desire you crave vs what you truly want/need’ that is present throughout the manga would be reflected.

My best guess however on why Laios reacted so quickly and forcefully is: trauma. The more recent arcs with Laios suggest that Laios has deep-seated trauma over humans. He dislikes humans as a whole, that was like, pretty much stated, though perhaps exaggerated. As a kid he fantasized about monsters wiping out human towns. We know Laios has been ostracized for most of his life by others, in his village and in the military, and beyond social rejection it’s shown he got beaten in group too and it was implied that it happened regularly. But damn, disliking humans to the point of wanting to be a monster and murderous genocidal reclusive envies and all of that stuff? That is massive trauma, massive identity & belonging issues and hint at massive trust issues.

So then, the negative reaction could be because of Laios’ deep trauma with humans. Because of trauma getting activated, not due to a miscalculation on the succubus’ part but due to a contradicting dislike of the desire that makes the form inherently and straight out of the gate un-alluring, Laios’ repression being so strong that he’s able to affect his own desires in that way, or an instinctive defense response to the trigger (a human). Even though Laios hides it well, once again recent arcs (and some other moments) make it clear that Laios still has some innate dislike of humans, which in canon is a term that all races like elves fit in. He has a bias against them, perhaps even an innate distrust of them. Who knows how aware he is of it, or how much control and will he has over it. What if Laios reacting agressively to it was his defense mode tied to this kicking in, a survival and security instinct, stopping any possibility of Laios wanting a romantic relationship with a human? Any chance of that human getting close and being hurt by it, either rejected or stabbed in the back? It’d then make sense if Laios is unaware and doesn’t understand his attraction to Marcille then, if it’s a sort of self-made blockage, denial. And that’d make full sense with how, when Marcille is suddenly a monster, then all of Laios’ reluctance is gone and he’s fully enthralled, all that it took was taking away that one blockage for Laios to be utterly charmed. It takes away the trigger element, humans, and replaces it for something safer. A desire for connections, but connections with people that are ‘safe’, people who also don’t fit in with society, who are part of his interest in monsters, who would accept and understand him. I think that Laios does desire human connections, specifically, but can’t allow himself to pursue them either from conscious or unconscious trauma, so though he does desire it he can’t accept that he does/can’t accept the relationship even if it’s handed to him on a silver platter.

Conclusion

The succubus’ shift could then be either that it switched from one wish, a wish for Marcille, to another, a wish for companionship in monster-liking, or that it stayed on the same fundamental wish, but had to improvise with the new information (that Laios is human-averse)(not bc it didn’t exist previously but bc it wasn’t manifested) to take out of the equation the thing that was holding Laios back (from giving in).

But well, the fact that the rest of the party is included does lean towards the former, but in any case that doesn’t erase all I’ve spoken about, all about how Marcille is 100% the focus of this whole thing. It could still be a bit of both. But it is interesting that he worries about the party’s reaction to seeing his succubus being Marcille, and when she shifts into monster Marcille he *still* worries about the others: “b-but what about the others?” He’s a mess, with his most alluring form seducing him, and he still has a shred of resistance in him to question how the others would react, and it’s only when she says that they’re already monsters too that he truly gives in. Is he really so afraid of ostracization? Of losing the people he cares about due to judgement? Then the mention of the others in the party can simply be something the succubus added on top to unlock another “blockage”, the same way she added Marcille being a monster on top of the basic premise of Marcille; Take out the immediate dismissal of humans first, and then the fear of loss and judgement from other friends so Laios can finally stop worrying and give in. That worry/framing I’d say makes the latter more credible, because it’s not the premise of the alluring form but an extra.

In the end, like the recent arcs kind of spell out, the thing central to Laios’ character is less so a love for monsters and moreso a dislike for humans, and this is what this puts on full display.

Laios’ most alluring form is Marcille, a human that doesn’t understand his interests and thus him, and regardless of everything else that Marcille is, that is so traumatic to him that all of his being immediately rejects it.

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Thanks for coming to my ted talk! I’ve spent so much time thinking about this and wording and rewording this same train of thought, also it’s the end of my college semester and I’m going crazy

Tldr: My personal fav theory for Laios’ succubus is that Laios really values Marcille’s smile a ton like it’s often mentioned, and that’s what his most alluring form centers on. I’ve got a ton of different interpretation on the why it’d go for a kiss? Since it tailors its approach to the person’s desires, but obviously something goes wrong with Laios’, which is really interesting because even with Izutsumi who resists because she has 2 souls so one part of her can always remain unaffected, the succubus hit bullseye on her most alluring forms. But regardless of that, I think his desire for Marcille (either her or what she represents, wether as a platonic ideal or something else) isn’t wrong/untrue perse, but that Laios has such a complex with humans and intimacy and connecting with others that his defense mode kicks in and that’s when the succubus has to shift into a different, safer desire: one that doesn’t involve humans but that still shows connections and acceptance and belonging. Also Laios realizes that it isn’t Marcille when she goes in for the kiss, which if his allure for her is based on familiarity since they’re friends and all could make sense that it’d break him away from it, or since it’s a liking based on familiarity he doesn’t freeze, or maybe it’s because the winged lion has its eye on him. I think that’s so much more likely with how Kui makes even her jokes be character moments or at least consistent, and also with the tension of the scene, than just the scene being a gag about how Marcille doesn’t mean much to Laios actually.

I think there’s a lot to be said about why Marcille is special to Laios, why her smile means something to him, etc, and I don’t think saying Marcille is special to him is exaggeration or reaching at all. Laios, Marcille and Falin are the golden trio, she’s the deuteragonist, she’s the only other character in the main party whose goal in going back for Falin is Falin and who has a bond with her and Laios outside of being coworkers, in post-canon they live together, happily, in the anime’s ending they’re emphased on by dining out all three together... I could go on. Marcille has the benefit of being very trusted by Laios, not only with the time they’ve spent together but how she was Falin’s friends first, the person he himself feels so protective of and has been so consistently ostracized throughout her life. Marcille represents a positive odd one out that’s like, the good example of "humanity can be good and safe and warm actually". Which is a big reason why imo Marcille is like, the secondary protag and with Falin they form the golden trio. She’s central to the story in many ways including making Laios see that humanity is worth saving and sticking with, but that’s a topic for another analysis. One such reason is how his first meeting with her went: it started really badly but ended with her coming around and unexpectedly sharing their interest in dungeons, which made him and Falin open up about the real reason they go dungeon diving, perhaps for the first time. There is just so much that goes into it but Laios seems generally very expectant of rejection: in the climax chapters after he transformed back as a human and was hiding out in the woods, pre-canon in an extra where we see him battling himself on if he should suggest eating monsters or not. But another one, the one I truly want to bring up in this post, is how genuine Marcille is! And funnily enough, how dramatic she is, and how her elf ears change position depending on her emotions. Like, let me compare her affectionately to a dog for a second, but dogs move their ears and use whole body language to communicate, and I think that part of Marcille, really strong emoting, with her ears and body language on top of her often dramatic facial expressions, reassure him. Like ok, maybe he can’t tell when Shuro and Kabru would lie to him, but Marcille? She wears her heart on her sleeve and her feelings on her whole self. And that takes away some of the stress and trauma he has with humans, explains why her smiles would “put him at ease”, doesn’t it?

I don’t remember wether I’ve mentioned this somewhere or just in my reblog linked at the end of the post, but while at first I thought the succubus going for a kiss on the lips heavily implied a romantic desire in Laios, now I have a couple different theories on why the succubus would have gone for that approach. I think the most likely is that, if the principal allure of his succubus is her smile, the succubus is like "as long as he sees her face right up until i can suck up his blood and he passes out I’ll be gucci", so it’s not about the kiss but about him seeing her face all the while until the very last moment, so he stays charmed.

Btw chapter 34 explores Laios’ relationship with touch too imo, and we see that he is uncomfortable with touch to some degree, very unsure and hesitant and tense. I feel like it’s something more shown in a bigger picture sense with his whole struggles with humans and extras, than just in any one page so go reread the beginning of that chapter if you want I’d say, but putting a page below as example anyways. I think it’s notable that it’s a character moment shared with Marcille too, she acts sort of like a bridge to humanity with social propriety and being extroverted in many cases. In the chapter Chil and Marcille point out how awkward he is with touch, but he learns to be casual/comfy enough about touch to do healing magic with her (something that was also enforced through him having to practice magic on Marcille turned to stone, he got a lot of touch exposure and magic practice done in those days. Dammit Laios, MArcille and touch is worthy of a whole analysis of its own). She’s just like, his human comfort zone, even if they aren’t that close at least at first, besides Falin he has literally like no friends and I think that itself shows how he doesn’t fit in well socially and that it’s a significant struggle for him. But yes what I was saying here is I believe there’s setup for him recoiling from touch like he did with the succubus (due to an instinctive aversion to touch made especially intense due to the succubus’ oddness and forwardness).

I have even more theories and rambling on details on the succubus here in a reblog, but unless I want to put in some pictures of Laios repressing himself around others and such I don’t think I’ll be touching this post again in a while

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #dunmeshi #laios touden #scene analysis #character analysis #analysis #chapter 60 succubus #spoilers #dungeon meshi manga spoilers #marcille donato #autistic king of trauma laios #-points at him- that’s me!… That’s me!!#laimar #but this isn't laimar truthism #polished this up since it's been like what six months #looked upthe dates it's been nine months... Whew #something something 'the reason you're both touch starved and touch averse is you spent so long without human touch that you interpret any #touch as a threat'

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nburkhardt · 7 months

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Saw a prompt and couldn’t let it go, so enjoy! 🥰 (no dialogue because I can’t figure that part out)

Steve has always craved touch even though he never got it.

His parents found out his unique ability at a young age when Steve touched his aunt and she immediately fell to the floor dead. Just from his skin touching hers. After that he wasn’t allowed any sort of touch, his parents warned anyone and everyone to avoid touching him. Near everyone in town knows, knows to avoid touch with him; stays away from him.

Steve manages, as much as someone can with deadly powers.

He figured out how to get his own comfort from plush toys and once he figured out when others touch his clothes first, nothing happens. He figures wearing sleeves and pants and gloves will always be his best options.

Still touch-starved though.

He has friends, but no one wants to get super close. Too afraid to accidentally touch. His parents leave often, also too afraid of his ability.

Eddie was told by his Uncle Wayne that he was special.

That when he was five, he was in a terrible car accident that should’ve killed him. It did kill his mom, but the emts and doctors were shocked that Eddie was fine. He was hurt, sure, but completely fine otherwise.

So, he grew to be little reckless. Lives on the edge and found out at sixteen that he can’t die. After several visits with specialists, it was officially confirmed.

He’s able to get hurt, pretty badly sometimes. But besides that, he can’t die. Which scares him just a bit but not enough to stop living life on the edge.

Steve leaves his hometown as soon as he can with only his things and a plan to get as far away as he can from all the people who are afraid of him.

He’s also afraid, so afraid that he’s not only touch-starved but also a little touch averse now. Doesn’t want anyone to die just by simply touching him. He might want touch, but will always be afraid.

They meet by chance, but mostly because of Eddie being a reckless idiot and his friends daring him to try running across very busy traffic. Which, as the daredevil he is, Eddie attempts to do it.

He’s only stopped by Steve freaking out at seeing it. For once, Steve acts before his brain catches up with him. Just throws his gloveless hand and grabs hold on Eddie’s arm to force him to stop moving.

Eddie jerks back and for a split second, feels a warmth before it fades. He’s taken back, annoyed at being stopped but also very confused. Most people that live here, know him. Know that he can get hurt but can’t die.

So this random person grabbing hold of his arm is new.

The touch registers in Steve’s head minutes later, as Eddie stares at him. He immediately lets go with wide eyes and panicking. But instead of the guy dropping dead, he’s still standing.

Eventually they’ll talk, they’ll learn each other’s abilities and someday in the future learn to love each other.

Sooo, I can’t figure out how to work out dialogue into this. Or really flesh out their abilities. But it’s a thing! If you want to take this and pick it apart, you’re definitely welcome to do so! (If you do tag me!)

Permanent tag list:

@spectrum-spectre @itsfreakingbats @mysticcrownshipper @artiststarme @thereindeerlady @justforthedead89 @ronniescontinuum @freyaforestafay @littlewildflowerkitten @gregre369 @zerokrox-blog @flustratedcas @carlprocastinator1000 @marvelmwah @solliesolesito @navnae @i-less-than-three-you @grimmfitzz @estrellami-1 @cartercaptainofthemoon @strangersteddierthings

#steddie #Steve Harrington #Eddie Munson #stranger things #nburkhardt writes #Steve x eddie #steddie au #touch starved steve harrington #but ALSO #touch averse Steve Harrington #reckless Eddie Munson #Eddie’s totally a daredevil you can’t tell me otherwise #it’s sorta x-men related but also very much not

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unicornpopcorn14 · 1 month

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Do you ever stop and think of how Chuuya's life before the PM was one of constant violence and brutality?

And how he might have been touch-averse early on in his life for how every touch he's known was vicious and barbaric?

Do you ever think about how this might be Chuuya's first experience of actual, gentle touch since he'd been picked up by the sheep??

Do you ever consider that the reason he looks so shocked aside from his ability getting swept away, is because this isn't a chokehold or a preparation to attack, but a mere hold?

Do you ever think about how No Longer Human might have taught him that gentle touch can be just as powerful as violent ones??

Oh, by the way,

Do you ever stop and consider that the reason Chuuya was reeling every time him and Dazai closed proximity isn't only because he doesn't stand Dazai but also because he absolutely hates the contact?

Do you ever think of how Dazai might have known how much Chuuya wasn't used to gentle touch and tormented him by doing shit like this just so he can see Chuuya's visceral reactions every time?

Do you ever imagine Chuuya trying to get used to gentle touch and even try to initiate some as payback?

And how he's come to appreciate and embrace it by doing so?

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kendallroygf · 1 year

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no bc all previous intimate kenstewy moments have been stewy being the one to reach out to ken both physically and figuratively (there’s a friend card here if you want to play it etc) but you’re telling me…that kendall roy who generally has an aversion to touch. rests his head on stewy’s shoulder!!! with a smile on his face…so basically you’re telling me he creates further intimacy on his own volition. with stewy. with his best friend called stewy. insane

#succession #like this is not a drill !!!! he’s playing the friend card. kenstewy is sooo real. insane issue #also like yeah. he has an aversion to touch but he’s generally also very touch starved and asks for touch with ppl he’s comfortable with #like shiv rava roman etc . so ur telling me stewy who’s he had a tumultuous relationship w for the last year is someone kendall still #considers to be safe comfortable etc. kenstew so real i love gay sex !!!#kenstewy #p

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nagichi-boop · 1 year

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I have seen occasional discussions on whether Donnie is touch averse or touch seeking and I think the answer is both, depending on the situation. If it’s contact he initiates, he is okay with it. If it’s contact he doesn’t initiate, he is either somewhat okay with it or very uncomfortable with it, even if it’s his family.

Some gifs to highlight what I mean:

Depending on the situation, his mood, who initiates, etc, he will react differently to physical contact. So I don’t think it’s as black and white as he hates touch or loves it - it’s situational.

#part of this is projection cuz I’m the same but also I just see it throughout the series #personally my headcanon is he’s touch starved and touch averse - he often wants hugs and such but on his terms only #any other time it just makes him uncomfortable #it’s a curse I relate to lol #donatello hamato #rottmnt donnie #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt #rottmnt headcanons #nagichi headcanons #character analysis #analysis

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toastedjeans · 4 months

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This was originally meant to be just platonic but i couldn't help myself so.. here you go, pepstavo enjoyers

Tw for blood and injuries

It was finally done. That wretched tower was no more, and everyone had made it out alive, without sustaining any significant injuries. Well, at least not during their escape. The battle atop the tower had left everyone a little battered and bruised, some moreso than others. Nonetheless, nobody was lethally wounded.

Peppino, Gustavo and Brick made their way back to the pizzeria, with the smaller one riding atop his newly acquired giant rat, while the other insisted on walking back. Even after he was offered to be carried on the rodent's back, he refused, claiming that he was alright, despite his limping and pained expression he tried to hide. He had ran and fought the whole day, had been burned, struck by lightning, squashed into pizza boxes, stuffed in barrels and rolled around, and much, much more. Multiple times. All the while breaking through countless lines of enemies under immense time constraints. He was utterly exhausted, but wouldn't let himself show any weakness. He didn't need anyone's pity, nor their mockery.

When the establishment came closer into view, Peppino stopped for a second, almost stumbling over in shock. A bit of debris from the tower had seemingly been thrown all the way over here, hitting a part of his beloved restaurant and leaving behind a huge hole in the wall. Broken glass and wood was strewn about on the floor, dust and small rocks all over the place. He couldn't believe his eyes. As much as the sight devastated him, it made him significantly more furious. The whole point of bringing that tower down was to save his pizzeria from destruction, and now part of it had been destroyed anyway. It didn't even matter in the end. He would love nothing more in this moment than to find Pizzahead, just so he could kick his face in once more until he was fully unrecognizable.

Gustavo turned to look at his friend, noticing his sour expression as he stood at the broken wall, leaning against it. He could only assume what must be going through his head at the moment. After all, he knew how much the pizzeria meant to his friend.

Hopping off of his trusty steed, the small man made his way over to the other.

"Are you okay, Pep?"

Peppino's hands formed into tight fists, his jaw clenched, but then he simply sighed. It wasn't worth it to get worked up about this now. As he looked at the chaotic state his establishment was in, he quietly stepped inside, his aching leg making itself apparent again. He forcefully shut one eye, a small tear threatening to fall down his face, which he wiped away with his arm.

Gustavo followed his friend inside, a worried look on his face as he watched him, painfully slowly, bending down to pick up a few broken off pieces of a table. He wasn't going to do what he thought he would, was he?

Peppino winced as he struggled to get up again, holding his hand against his back in an attempt to stabilize himself. He ignored the pain spreading throughout his whole body, making his way over to the counter and placing the debris he gathered on it. His friend approached slowly, with Brick close by, sniffing around the wreckage in hopes of finding something to nibble on. He let out a short sneeze.

Gustavo watched as his fellow chef went to fetch a broom from the nearby closet, already sweeping up the floor. Or, at least as much as his aching body would let him.

"Peppino, come on", he started, "I know how much you love your pizzeria, but don't you wanna take a break first?" His voice was quiet and gentle, yet a little firm.

He shook his head, letting out a sigh, "I can't, Gus. You know I can't." He didn't even look at his friend, trying to push past him. "I have to fix all this", he gestured into the room, "and the debts aren't gonna pay themselves."

Gustavo sighed as he watched his friend struggle to move, his limping seemingly getting worse. He knew how stubborn he could get, something that sometimes could be a blessing, but it was mostly a curse.

"Of course they aren't, but-"

Just then, Peppino's leg gave in, and he fell to his knees, letting out a strained grunt. The other man quickly rushed to his side, carefully placing his hands on both his shoulders.

"You need to take care of yourself first."

Finally, he brought himself to look at the smaller one, exhaustion clearly evident in his eyes. His body trembled lightly, slowly losing more and more strength and energy.

"And if you aren't doing well", Gustavo continued, retreating his arms, "the pizzeria is gonna suffer from it. You know that."

But Peppino was persistent. With shaking hands, he pushed his friend aside once more, trying to stand up again. He couldn't give in just yet, not in front of Gustavo. He was supposed to be the strong one, the one in charge. What would he think of him if he just let himself show how weak he actually was? Not that he cared too much about what his friend thought of him, or at least he didn't admit that he did. The only thing he didn't want was to disappoint him, destroy this image of himself for him. He couldn't risk Gustavo seeing who and what he truly was, or at least to what extent. He was pathetic, an anxious wreck.

Of course, the other knew him well, flaws, insecurities and all. But sometimes, he couldn't help but worry that the only person he truly cared about would leave him behind after witnessing him in a state of vulnerability. Just like everybody else in his past would.

"This is all I have, Gustavo", he managed to push out, "I've handled that damn tower, I can handle a measly hole in the wall."

Gustavo's face fell, knowing how much he tended to push himself to the brink of his limits. Whether it was to ensure every customer's satisfaction, or to meet deadlines, he always tried to give his all, and even more. And if anything didn't meet his self-imposed high standards, it wasn't good enough. He wasn't good enough. Everything had to be perfect. And by extension, he had to be perfect. It was no wonder the man was chronically stressed.

When Peppino managed to stand up again, his body was shaking even harder than before. Preparing to take a step, he sharply inhaled and threatened to fall to the ground again, if Gustavo hadn't immediately reacted and caught him. Despite his small stature, he firmly held onto the taller one's body with ease, clicking his tongue to get his pet's attention. The rat looked up from the rubble, a small piece of cheese in its mouth, before trotting over to the two men with an affirmative squeak.

"Look, I know you could handle it.", he said as he laid his friend down onto Brick's back, who let out a quick huff, not used to carrying this much weight.

"If this was any other day, it would be fine. But look at you, you can barely even stand."

"Stop patronizing me." Peppino grumbled quietly, turning his head away from his friend in shame. He hated being this vulnerable, this weak.

Gustavo exhaled quietly, patting Brick's side to signal that they were going to leave, and started walking beside his furry companion. Despite them only knowing each other since the beginning of this whole tower debacle, they perfectly understood the other, as if they'd been a team for years. Like a loyal dog, the abnormally large rodent stayed by his side, following him to wherever he would lead them.

"I'm not patronizing you. You're my friend, Peppino. I care about you."

His friend was quiet for a few moments, still averting his eyes. He only muttered a few weak protests in response, which the other didn't quite catch. But perhaps that had been for the best. A continued argument would just wear them out even more, and he didn't want things to become heated between them. Especially not when they both desperately needed rest.

---

The front door opened, and the group of three stepped into the cozy little apartment. Gustavo was lucky his landlord didn't see them walk in, he did not have the capacity to argue about the presence of an enormous rat in his living quarters right now. Having pets wasn't allowed, much less a rodent of this size. Hopefully he could persuade them that it was his new service animal or something similar.

Brick cautiously sniffed around the room, making himself familiar with the new place. He walked over to the small couch in the middle of the living room, plopping down in front of it, as if trying to hint at something. The man who still lay atop his back let out a short grunt at the sudden stop.

After locking the door and getting a few supplies, Gustavo quickly joined his visitors, helping his friend relocate from one surface to the other. As warm and fuzzy as Brick was, it was finally nice to sit on something that wasn't living and breathing. At least the couch wouldn't complain about his weight. Verbally, that is.

Peppino's eyelids twitched when Gustavo lifted his arm to examine it. There were only minor cuts and bruises, nothing too severe that needed immediate medical attention. Still, the touch stung a bit. When he moved on down to his hand, carefully hovering over his knuckles, Peppino could feel his cheeks warm up a little. He instinctively pulled his arm back to his side, avoiding the other's gaze once more while pouting. His friend just looked at him with a mix of confusion and slight disappointment, before releasing a quiet sigh. He was fully aware of his friend's aversion to touch, especially his hands and face. And of course he didn't want to push things or make him uncomfortable, but it would certainly make it harder to check for injuries, let alone tend to them. Then again, he could have asked before touching him.

"Pino?" Gustavo's voice was quiet, and he patiently waited for his friend to look back at him. Sure enough, Peppino's head turned ever so slightly, ever so slowly, until their eyes finally met. As was so often the case, his brow was furrowed in general unease. It wasn't that he was uncomfortable in the other man's presence, far from it. He just hated being seen in the state he was in at the moment.

"Would you let me take a look at your leg?", the other finally asked, to which he crossed his arms in protest, huffing for further emphasis.

"It's fine! You're just wasting your time!" Even if the volume of his voice returned momentarily, he wasn't able to hide the way it sounded so strained. Yes, it hurt, his whole body did, but he would get through it. He had to.

Gustavo's expression fell a little, but he didn't want to give up just yet. It could be something serious, after all.

"At least show it to me. Please."

The bigger man hesitated, wringing his hands together. The concern in his friend's small eyes made his stubbornness waver little by little, and he finally released a breath he had been holding in. With slow and careful movements, he removed his boots and placed them next to the couch. Rolling up his pant leg, he sucked in a quick breath as the fabric brushed against his skin, slowly revealing what he had hidden from his best friend.

The cut on his lower leg was deep, the blood around it half dried. A thin crust had already formed on the sides. How he had gotten such a nasty wound without his pants ripping was beyond him, but at least the fabric seemed to have stopped the blood flow well enough. Fresh red liquid started to spill out of the gash once more, slowly running down Peppino's leg, which had begun to tremble.

Gustavo's eyes widened, his pulse quickened. He couldn't let his friend suffer with a wound like that. Something had to be done, and he would be the one to do it.

Without a word, he stood up from the couch to get some warm water, took some supplies, and sat down on the floor next to his friend. He gave the other man a hesitant look as he reached out to place his shaking hand on his knee. Peppino's brow furrowed with guilt and embarrassment, and even if the feeling of Gustavo's skin on his made his throat narrow and his chest heavy, he slowly gave him a short nod, allowing him to tend to his wounds.

Gustavo's hands were slow and gentle as he cleaned the big cut. The warm water felt nice on Peppino's skin, even if everything else was unpleasant and stung, making him wince in pain. Every so often, his friend would retreat his arms and glance up to check on him, to make sure he's as comfortable as he could be in a situation like this. He would give him an apologetic look before continuing to treat his injury, right before he did something he knew would be a little more painful. Brick had positioned himself on the couch, right next to the injured man, occasionally nudging his hand with his snout and offering comfort and distraction. Peppino was still wary about the huge rodent, but soon enough he found himself scratching Brick behind his ears and patting his back, while his best friend continued to tend to him. As much as he didn't like rats, this particular one seemed to slowly grow on him.

Peppino would never admit it, but it felt surprisingly nice to be taken care of for once. Usually he did everything by himself, very rarely accepting help from others. It wasn't that he didn't trust anyone else or that he was selfish. Although, sometimes he could be. But most of the time, he didn't want to burden anyone. Especially not people he was close with.

Gustavo was a dear friend to him, maybe even his only friend, always by his side, always supporting him. Even now, after he hadn't been honest with him, he continued to care for him, continued to stay with him. He just... couldn't understand why. Why would he continue to be his friend, when all he did was weigh him down, hold him back, burden him with his problems?

His face fell. He continued to pet the rat's soft fur, lost in thought. He didn't deserve to be treated with such patience and compassion. Why would he? All he did was complain and whine about his debt, and hide behind his constant anxiety. He wasn't good for anything.

And yet. The way Gustavo took care of him, the way he kept glancing back at him to ensure his comfort, the way his gentle hands felt against his skin. It felt strange, yet nice. Unfamiliar, yet warm and inviting. It made his skin crawl and his chest flutter, and it left him craving more. More of his touch, more of his warmth, more of his proximity. It made him feel lighter, more at ease, something he didn't even know he could feel like.

Gustavo's work was nearly done, he just finished wrapping the leg in bandages, careful to apply just enough, but not too much pressure. After all, he didn't want his friend and coworker to endure even more pain than he already did. He let out a sigh, his own exhaustion slowly catching up to him, and glanced up to Peppino. His cheeks seemed flushed, but it was hard to tell in the dim light of dusk. He wore a melancholic expression on his face, his eyes focused on the animal next to him, not quite realizing his treatment was over yet. As they wandered over and met with Gustavo's, the man's face remained still for a second, then flushed deeper, and he cleared his throat while turning his head away.

"I- uh... Thanks. For that..." Peppino managed to stutter, his voice barely audible. His face was still turned away, and he had crossed his arms over his chest, but his shoulders were hunched forward, as if he wanted to make himself smaller. His uninjured leg bounced with nervousness as Gustavo stood up from the ground and gave him a smile and a light chuckle, preparing to move Peppino's boots towards the front door. His friend held himself a little tighter, rubbing his arms as if he was cold. He still felt the lingering warmth of Gustavo's touch, or perhaps it was just the blood flowing through his leg, or the applied bandages. Either way, he couldn't help but yearn for more of this feeling, more of these sensations. More of Gustavo.

He shook his head. Ridiculous. He was a grown man, damn it! How could the closeness to another human being make him so... weak? It was ridiculous. He was ridiculous.

Gustavo returned to the other man's side with a big blanket and several pillows under his arms. He placed the biggest pillow on one side of the couch, fluffing it up for good measure, but stopped in his tracks when he noticed Peppino intently watching him, his arms held up to his chest.

"Are you okay with sleeping on the couch? I mean, I can lend you my bed too if-"

"N-no, I'm fine! It's. It's fine, I can- I can sleep here. No worries!" He waved his hands in front of himself, then formed an O-shape with his finger and thumb, forcing a nervous grin. Gustavo just smiled as he held back a giggle, his friend reminding him of the logo on his own pizza boxes. He sure could be cute when he was flustered.

After a moment of awkward silence, they both settled into their respective beds. Peppino finally managed to lay down, his leg cushioned by small, yet surprisingly soft pillows. The couch itself wasn't the most comfortable, but it beat the old and worn down mattress he usually slept on by miles. The blanket was so thick and warm, and it smelled so fresh too. This was certainly different, and a huge upgrade compared to his normal sleeping situation. He already wasn't sure if he would even be able to go back to his own bed after spending a night here. Or several nights. Or however long it took until he could walk without falling flat on his face. He hoped it wasn't too long. After all, he didn't want to take advantage of Gustavo's hospitality like this. It just didn't feel right.

"Oh, and Pino?", his host's voice nearly made him jump, he turned his head towards where it came from, "If you need anything... I'm right here. My door is open for you, okay?"

Peppino hesitated, then nodded and gave back a quick hum in agreement. He watched as Gustavo smiled at him, slowly turning around and disappearing into his own room again, and he sighed. He held his hand up to his face, forming it into a fist a few times, then brushed his thumb against his index finger. His brow furrowed once again. Why did it feel so nice when it was his touch, yet so... normal, almost dull when it was his own? Why was his smile so contagious, his laugh so magical? And why didn't he notice it until now? Has it always been that way, and he just didn't pay enough attention to him before? Should he tell Gustavo how he made him feel, or would he be mad at him, or even worse, disgusted or weirded out by him?

He felt a small nudge against his elbow, followed by a short sneeze. It was already dark, but he could still easily recognize Brick's face staring up at him from the floor, his big eyes focused on him. Peppino let out a slightly annoyed sigh, letting his fingers wander through the rat's warm fur. A delighted squeak escaped the rodent, and the man reluctantly continued to pet it, his previous thoughts pushed to the back of his mind, momentarily forgotten.

He'd have time to figure things out in the morning as well. The exhaustion finally caught up to him. For now he could rest.

#toast writing #pizza tower #peppino spaghetti #gustavo pizza tower #brick pizza tower #gustavo and brick #pepstavo #cw blood #cw injury #anyway i hc peppino to be ace and somewhere on the aro spectrum #like. he hasn't experienced romantic attraction before and it confuses him #that AND he's incredibly touch starved. but also touch averse #what do you mean I'm projecting no i would never #old man yearning hours <3

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helsex · 1 month

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Ex probably gets extremely overwhelmed by hugs and physical affection . They've been touch starved so long they can't remember if they actually like it or not so every time someone makes physical contact they just get increasingly more upset and frustrated at the fact that they both hate it and need more desperately

#evil x #touch averse and touch starved autistic 💥#helsex.txt

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promptsforyourwhumpfic · 1 year

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Whump Prompt #1135

How does everyone react when A, who is renowned for being touch-averse, actually initiates touch?

Maybe they give B a quick hug/pat on the back/hold their hand without realising. (Maybe A is going off to fight, or maybe they’re very sick/injured/scared.)

Do the friends/family immediately call A out in a playful way? Or do they remain quiet so A doesn’t become aware of what they’re doing? Maybe they’re proud of how far A has come, as in the past simply going near A caused them to take a step back.

#whump #writing prompts #angst #touch aversion #touch starved #writing #prompts #injury #illness #delirium #family dynamics #team as family

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transfemzedaph · 26 days

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joel is weird abt pda. he will joke about kissing & holding hands and like all those kinda things. and he will do them in public. But Only if theyre jokes. bc he hates being vulnerable. so he wont do serious affection in public.

#original post tag #sometimes he doesnt even do it at all i think. joel/etho touch averse boyfriends.#<- joels touch starved also and he knows it. and ethos touch starved but he doesnt know it #jdhjsdgdh

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meraki24601 · 8 months

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Not Sick: Part 2

Whumptober day 2! Woohoo! I chose thermometer.

Part 1

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Something was poking the inside of Whumpee’s mouth. Not the way they wanted to wake up.

“No. I told you to hold that still.” A voice groaned as a hand pushed Whumpee’s jaw closed, pressing the object firmly into their mouth and below their tongue. “Don’t whine at me. If you had told me you were sick sooner, we could have caught this before it got so bad.”

The hand on Whumpee's face was cool. Their skin felt like it was burning. Every part of them ached, pulling a moan from their ashy throat.

A loud beeping made Whumpee flinch, and the hand drew away, taking the object with it. They missed the comfort immediately. Whumpee couldn't stop the slight lean in the direction it had gone. They needed it back. Please, don't leave them like that.

Music flowed over Whumpee, releasing the tension holding them under.

The voice was humming a familiar tune. The song's name was on the tip of their tongue, but Whumpee couldn't seem to grasp it. Instead, they allowed their eyes to flutter open, squinting against the light coming in from the open window.

Caretaker was standing next to Whumpee's desk, observing the object in their hand and taking notes. Their brow was furrowed in that funny way that made Whumpee want to remind them of their future wrinkles. But… their mouth was quirked up in a soft, lopsided smile. It was new. They were humming so softly. Obviously trying not to disturb Whumpee while providing some small comfort since they hummed louder every time Whumpee took a deep breath. This was new. This was odd and… new.

Whumpee gasped as their throbbing head clenched around their focus. Their hand shook as they dragged it out from under the blanket wrapped around them to grip at their forehead. The only thing that kept them from crying out was Caretaker whispering gently, "Yeah, I know. I'll get some more medicine once the stores open, but you're going to have to hang on until then, and… You're awake."

Flinching slightly at the rough change in Caretaker's voice, they looked over at their roommate. A frown had taken over their expression, and they looked mad. Whumpee wanted to apologize immediately. If stores weren't even open, it must have been really early. Caretaker had no reason to be standing in their room taking care of them when Whumpee had been nothing but rude the past couple of days. They wanted to thank them for being kind. Maybe even ask for some water since they honestly couldn't remember the last time they were able to keep some down. "Not sick."

"Really? Hmm. Guess we need to get a new thermometer since this one says you have a 102° (39°C) fever." Caretaker tossed the thermometer on the desk. "Tell you what, if you can sit up on your own, I'll believe you. Even though you've been basically unconscious for the past two days."

Now that was a bad idea. Too late now, though.

Whumpee tried. They shook and shivered. They moaned with each wave of hurt. When Caretaker started to apologize and take back their words, Whumpee ignored them. They made it up to their elbows, head too heavy to hold above their pillows before Caretaker intervened.

Caretaker's arms wrapped around Whumpee, taking on their weight as Whumpee dropped in surprise. A hand shifted to lift Whumpee's head to Caretaker's shoulder. Whumpee waited for the panic to take over, but it didn't come.

"I'm sorry, Whumpee. I know, I'll let you go in just a second. Let me shift your pillows so you can rest on them. I'll stop touching you, I promise. Just let me help you for a moment."

Whumpee turned their head so they were buried against Caretaker's cool throat.

Fear didn't come until Caretaker released them in a more upright position against their pillows. Why had that felt so good? Nobody touches Whumpee. They didn't want them to. What was this fever doing to them? Their chest tightened. What moisture they had in their mouth caught and triggered a deep cough that didn't stop.

"I'm sorry, Whumpee. Just stay still. I'll get you some water." Caretaker sounded on the brink of tears as they rushed out the door.

They didn't see Whumpee's hand reaching after them. They were gone before Whumpee choked out a desperate plea for them to stay.

Part 3

#whumptober2023 #no.2 #thermometer #oc #writing #sickfic #fever #caretaker #whumpee #touch starved #touch aversion

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ceo-of-sloppy-men · 9 months

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Being touch-starved and touch-averse is so fucking funny. Like, "yes, I love hugs... please don't hug me."

#every time without fail if someone touches me i recoil #i'm a walking joke of the gods #ceo's ramblings #mini vent #touch averse #touch starved #life is a cruel joke

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the-herdier · 9 months

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