#that caitie could’ve done it

[theloveinc]

(warning: makes no sense, you’re kinda mean, gn)

-

Bakugo is a little bit in love with you.

Well, he likes to think it’s not love so much as it is just a ginormous, fantastic, debilitating crush. But it could be love, eventually. If, one day, you let it be.

Right now, you’re just friends. Good friends, ones who study together. Ones who do more than that, sit in the cafeteria and eat together, maybe even walk home together after, too. And it’s slow going, but it’s going. A little mundane, but far more than he’s ever before hoped for, which he knows because there’s a part of him that has already decided that he’d do anything for you and let you do anything to him.

So Bakugo knows how he feels (he knows a lot about things when it comes to you)... and that, in itself, is enough. 

Especially, when you get questioned:

“Isn’t he a little…” a person asks one day, hesitates, almost as if they’re scared for you when they say it, their eyes flitting between you both, “mean?”

“Mean?“ you ask, eyes wide.

They nod, “he gets mad all the time.”

Bakugo feels his blood start to simmer, his heart begin to race, and he has to clench both his fists and his jaw to stop himself from committing an act just short of violence. Or even worse, one that scares you off.

But on the other side of the table, you just stare at his assailant; blinking like they’re dumb, like the whole thing doesn’t matter, and like they didn’t just insult him in a way that he wants to forget but he’s sure he’ll dwell on for a long time to come. Because truth is, he’s mean and he knows it, but not how to spare the people around him from facing the brunt of it. 

And that… is what feels bad.

You, on the other hand, don’t seem to mind, replying to the question like it’s easy, like the words aren’t true when it’s very apparent they are. In any other case, to any other person, would be. He can feel his chest prickle.

“Not at all,” the words are confident, comforting, surprising, and you turn to face him with a pretty smile. “Watch this: 

“Hey, Bakugo,” you get real close to his face, close enough that he can almost count your eyelashes, see the trust in your irises, the humor, and it’s another thing he finds that he loves. “Fuck you.”

The words don’t really sting, the blood in cheeks cools… and he can’t help but admit that he’s just a little bit proud of himself when he smiles easy, too. The curl in his lip humorous, your very own inside joke.

“Fuck you right back.”

You grin, and for some reason, Bakugo feels safe.

#bakugo #don't read this #me writing things that only make sense to me #sdlkfjajsdfaksdjadjka hate that lowkey #but whatever #this was actually supposed to be about like. bakugo being proud of himself for like being in love with u such that when u bully him he #enjoys it #or something #but that got lost in the draft bc I lost the mood going to class #and bc I realized I’m not the same person who wrote my other drabble #about bakugo thinking it’s hot when ur mad #that caitie could’ve done it #anyway was gonna scrap this but I figure I just need to stop caring about whether the moral of the story is comprehensible or not #so . sorry #caitie post

[fxingdead]

It absolutely hilariously disgusting to me how a women can come out about their sexual assault and have the man admit it, yet you guys still refuse to believe her.

He admitted to it. He admitted to touching her and not asking consent. He admitted to assuming that this drunk girl he had only met a day ago was ok with him putting his hand up her shirt and touching her boobs in a room full of people. He admitted to it all yet you still try and deny it. Try and find excuses and reasons to support him and defend him, if you still wanna watch him go for it at this point! don’t invalidate someones story just so you can feel comfortable watching that person. Own up to the truth that your an asshole who doesn’t actually care about victims and just want to watch his stupid little YouTube videos and stream.

He hasn’t even fully addressed the issue at hand instead tiptoeing his way around and finding distractions for you guys so you don’t actually focus on the situation at hand. Picking bits and pieces she left out or was inconsistent on to make you guys not trust her. What does a man who wasn’t even there during the assault have anything to do with this? Why are you calling this guy who didn’t even see what fucking happened? It’s so incredibly irrelevant to the actual problem! You put your hand under her shirt and start touching her boobs in a room full of people, and instead of apologizing and addressing the fact that what you had done is wrong you are saying making excuses. It’s not that difficult to just fucking apologize.

“Well he was drunk” and? So was caiti and she didn’t start fucking touching his tits, now did she? I’ve been a little drunk before, never have I touched someone’s tits because of it. Even if he was seriously out of it wouldn’t he have just apologized for it? instead of trying to make excuses to why he’s a good guy! Just makes him like a bigger prick. Like he seriously could’ve just said “I’m sorry I was drunk but I seriously shouldn’t have touched you without your consent, it was wrong for me to assume that you would be ok with it and I am terribly sorry that I have cause you harm.” Is that such a difficult thing to ask or say? It’s not. take accountability instead of making pointless excuses to distract people from the actual topic.

Fuck georgenotfound

Fuck George Davidson

#mcyt #dsmp #relatable #mental health #support victims #fuck georgenotfound #caitibugzz #georgenotfound #fuck gnf #gnf #gnf mcyt #mcytumblr #sexualassault #support caitibugz #support caiti #silence is not consent #survivors #george davidson

[adorethedistance]

He’s An Idiot - Mat Barzal x Reader

Hockey Masterlist

Warnings: Swearing (?), angst, anxiety/panic

Words: 2063

Summary: When Mat unceremoniously reveals he’s had a girlfriend for two months without telling you, something goes terribly wrong as you turn toward a good friend for comfort.

A/n: Hi. this is old. and self indulgent. and garbage. Please enjoy!

How I ended up in the passenger’s seat of Tito’s car in an almost completely empty parking garage, is a story that will be a lot funnier in retrospect than in the moment.

Tonight the Isles were playing the Flyers, an ‘easy win’ according to Mat, and it was to a certain degree. The score finished 3-2 Isles and in a celebratory haze I barrelled through the Coliseum to greet my best friend. I congratulated the baby Isles and their elders alike as they came out to greet their respective parties.

The younger guys had an assortment of friends to meet them; the older guys were met with bright smiles from their wives and children. Mat, Tito, and I were kind of in that middle range where you’re no longer living the bachelor life and trying to pursue serious relationships, but not quite entering the engagement process either. The arrival of the younger Isles ushered them into the middle category, and the prospect of Mat looking into something serious excited me to say the least.

I’m fully head over heels for my best friend. And that’s why it hurt so bad tonight when he didn’t even spare me a single glance as he was rushing over to bear hug this girl who I was surprised to find out wasn’t a supermodel. She was absolutely gorgeous by all conventional beauty standards. Hell, I’d pick her too.

As he effortlessly lifted her from the ground to spin around in excitement, I figured maybe they’re just super close friends. Mat and I are as close as close gets, and he’s done that to me a fair amount of times. ‘It’s no big deal’ is what I told myself. That is, until I watched him lean down to passionately kiss this girl on the lips. My heart sinks to the deepest pit of my stomach; it feels like a javelin has landed right in the center of my chest. Mat and I tell each other everything, how come I didn’t have the slightest clue that this girl existed until right this very moment?

I must’ve not been hiding my heartbreak well, as Tito approached me like I was a wild horse that’s easily spooked. He gently placed a hand on my shoulder blade, careful not to scare me, but I jumped anyway. I was hoping he wouldn’t realize what was going on, but the sympathetic look in his eyes told me that there was no use in trying to deny it.

“You guys played a great game tonight.” My head whipped around to find that it’s Mat’s girl who’s complimenting Tito, and my sadness slowly became something resembling panic. Mat smiled dumbly at the beautiful girl and I surprised myself with my ability to speak without letting my voice crack.

“Who’s this?” I asked and Mat looked at me in amusement and confusion before his face dropped slightly.

“Did I not tell you about Caitlyn?” Caitlyn. “I could’ve sworn I did.”

“Um, no. You didn’t,” I laughed awkwardly. Don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry.

“Oh, well, this is my girlfriend. Y/n, Caitlyn. Caitlyn, Y/n.” Girlfriend.

“I’m Caitlyn.”

“Y/n.” She giggled adorably at our additions to the redundancy.

“Girlfriend?” Tito asked, but not nearly as surprised as I was.

“Yeah, we decided to make it official on our one month anniversary.” Anniversary.

“You’ve been together for a month?”

“Two, actually.” Two?! I decided I deperately wanted to get the fuck out of dodge, and made an effort to try and draw the conversation to a close.

“We should probably get going since I gotta get home to feed Luna. It was nice meeting you, Caitlyn.” I was ready to go and ushering Mat to do the same, but he just looked at me in mild shock.

“Oh, fuck, I completely forgot I was giving you a ride.”

“Oh.” Ouch.

“Beau, can you take Y/n home? Caitie and I were gonna go back to my place.” Tito gave Mat a look that, had I been in my right state of mind, I could’ve figured out; he agreed nonetheless. At that, Mat and Caitlyn went to leave; Caitlyn called out a polite ‘nice to meet you’ behind her as they left.

He didn’t even turn around to say goodbye.

I felt like there was a holed burned into the center of my chest by radioactive acid. Tito noticed my state of shock and sympathetically took my hand to lead me out of the rink.

My trance wasn’t broken until we had reached Tito’s car; it wasn’t until Beau uttered a soft “hey, hey woah” and pulled me in for a hug that I even noticed I was crying. It wasn’t a sob, or even a weep. Just a numb, empty stare and a stream of tears rolling down the expanse of my cheeks.

“I didn’t even know she existed until tonight, and they’ve been dating for two months?”

“I knew he was talking to someone but, because I thought you already knew, I didn’t bring it up because I didn’t want you to feel bad. I’m so sorry.”

“You don’t need to be sorry. You didn’t know.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” I pondered the offer for a moment before nodding a heartfelt ‘yes’. Beau opened the door for me to climb into the passenger seat and instead of turning on the car and driving away, we sat there for ‘as long as I needed’ as Beau put it.

So that’s how I ended up in the passenger’s seat of Tito’s car in an almost completely empty parking garage.

We’ve been sitting here for a solid hour, just the two of us, although it’s mostly just me talking and Beau doing anything he can to comfort me. He’s known about my thing for Mat for a little while now, and though we’re not as close and Mat and I are, after tonight’s incident, I’d say we’re on the way to becoming really good friends. If not, that’d be awkward since I’ve spent the last 30 minutes crying off my mascara onto his game-day dress shirt.

“I just feel like such an idiot for falling for him. And now he loves someone else and I have no other option but to find a way to live with that if I still want to have some kind of relationship with him.” I’m fiddling with my phone to distract myself from crying. It’s somewhat working, but every now and then I feel more and more of my guard crumble. I open my messages to my conversation with Mat before the game, and reread the very clear ‘you’re taking me home after the game right?’ and ‘ya just get an Uber and then I’ll drive you back’. He probably said the exact same thing to Caitlyn after, forgetting about me in the process.

“You’re not an idiot. If anything, he’s an idiot for not seeing the beautiful girl right in front of him.”

“...It just-” my voice cracks as a fresh wave of tears blur my vision “It just really fucking sucks that I have to accept that I’ll never be good enough for him. Like, I feel a certain way with him that I don’t feel with anyone else. I think I’m in love with him, Beau. And now that he has a girlfriend there’s no chance in hell I could ever tell him that.”

Swoosh

Confused by the sound effect of my phone that had the volume cranked up in the arena, I look down at the illuminated screen and feel that familiar burning in my chest.

“No. No no no no no, NO!” I sit upright in my seat and immediately begin typing, the keyboard click sound effects rapidly firing beneath my fingertips. After a very clear DO NOT PLAY THAT text, I hit play on the audio recording I’d just sent to Mathew.

‘-sucks that I have to accept that I’ll never be good enough for him. Like, I feel a certain way with him that I don’t feel with anyone else. I think I’m in love with him, Beau. And now that he has a girlfriend there’s n-’

Is the only sound that fills the dormant vehicle. Beau looks just as horrified as I feel, and I begin hyperventilating.

Please Mathew I am begging you do not listen to that audio

Please don’t play that audio

I know Mat, and I know that no amount of pleading texts will stop him from listening to that audio. If anything, my stark reaction might encourage him to listen to it. When I look up and meet Beau’s eyes, I immediately start bawling, wailing as if I’d just watched my cat Luna get bulldozed in the street. That’s it. It’s over. As soon as he hears that message, he’s going to distance himself from me and then he’ll be gone for good.

“He’s gonna listen to it- he’s gonna listen to that an-” I choke on my words as my own sobs suffocate me and Tito simply holds me as tight as he can without hurting me. He keeps my head pressed tightly against his chest, cradling my face as we both suspend our disbelief of the inevitable. My thoughts continue to spiral and I can physically feel all of my anxiety congregating at the forefront of my mind.

“I’m such a fuck up, Beau. I don’t know what to do.”

“You’re not a fuck up.” I’m surprised he could understand a word I’m saying based on how strangled my words are by my sobs. “Shhh. You’re okay. It’s gonna be okay. You know Barzy, he…” His trailing off in uncertainty is the straw that breaks my back and I feel the world around me collapse. I can’t ever face him again.

“What am I going to do?”

“We’ll figure something out, okay?”

“He’s going to listen to it. I’ll never be able to face him again.”

__________________________

Rolando is here with your food, my phone pings.

Three days later and I’m laying in bed staring at the ceiling, numb, as tears slide down my temples.

He’s listened to it. I know he has. There’s no way in hell he hasn’t. Mathew Barzal is a nosy son of a bitch and I’d be a fool to think for one second that he wouldn’t listen to an audio message that was sent with a pleading ‘please don’t listen’ text attached. Truth be told I didn’t think he’d wait this long to form a reply.

I mean, how hard is it to send a quick ‘I’m sorry but I’m not in love with you and I’m in a serious committed relationship’ text?

The anxiety that’s been brewing inside me for the last few days has been more than enough to keep me from leaving the house. I’ve isolated myself in totality, only accepting the occasional FaceTime from Beau where he’d call just to ensure I was alive.

At this point, the exhaustion of laying around and doing nothing has consumed me beyond the ability of addressing my basic necessities. I’d neglected myself for a good chunk of these last few days; rather than letting myself continue to starve, I figured I’d order myself some pity sushi. Because a 3PM dinner is better than no dinner.

Mustering the strength to roll out of bed, I trudge my way through my pad to the front door. A brown paper bag of sushi and my favorite drink sits prettily on my doorstep, and I sigh at the realization that I finally have food.

I look up to find Rolando as he walks away to thank him for his service, but my throat closes at the sight of Mat being a mere ten feet away from my front door. He smiles at me with a soft smile that indicates no sign of having learned that I’m in love with him. It’s the same one he gave me when I invited him to my work one day and he got to see me in my element. It’s the same one he gave me when I picked him up from the airport for the very first time. And it’s the same one he gave Caitlyn when his two worlds collided as the two of us met.

“Hey, Mat.”

“Hey… Can we talk?”

***

A/n: I know this is low quality but I wanted to get something out before I start classes up really soon. hope yall like it 

#NHL imagine #NHL hockey #NHL x reader #Mat Barzal #Mat Barzal fanfiction #Mat Barzal fanfic #Mat Barzal fic #Mat Barzal writing #Mat Barzal imagine #Mat Barzal oneshot #Mat Barzal one shot #Mat Barzal fluff #Mat Barzal smut #Mat Barzal angst #Mat Barzal x reader #Mat Barzal x y/n #Mathew Barzal #Mathew Barzal fanfiction #Mathew Barzal fanfic #Mathew Barzal fic #Mathew Barzal writing #Mathew Barzal imagine #Mathew Barzal oneshot #Mathew Barzal one shot #Mathew Barzal x reader #Mathew Barzal x y/n #Mathew Barzal fluff #Mathew Barzal smut #Mathew Barzal angst

[ins0mnia-an0nym0us-au]

my thoughts on Legends of Tomorrow 6x05 [SPOILER WARNING]

im late i know

astra was ready to be a productive member of society & john just left her out there to do it herself? COLD

but also we could've like. stolen the dog from the racist neighbor. the puppy deserves a better owner

isn't astra technically like 13yrs old? at least she didn't get a real childhood so she's probably emotionally stunted. y'all should be really working on that...

okay. caity lotz serves the gays every single time she directs. we appreciate an ally

can we all agree its great to get more clone trauma brought back up in our faces - cuz that wasn't explored enough. i'm not being sarcastic either. the same with wtf was sara doing with the neck snapping??? sara??? honey??? u okay???

LET ME JUST REMIND EVERYONE

ava = turned into a binder *nerd* zari = turned into a fliphone nate = turned into a wheel of cheese behrad = turned into a LIT candle spooner = turned into FORK

goddammit legends. i love you so much. but also i missed astra? okay. so im happy she's back. caity lotz directed another banger.

THEORY TIME: bishop knew that if sara got free there was a high chance she'd kill him if pushed far enough. so like. what better way to ensure survival than a reset button attached to either one of them if the other dies? not an actual button but like. idk how it'd be done. but one of them dies - boom back to the start but just on that planet? idk. he could just have clones.

#dc legends of tomorrow #legends of tomorrow #spoilers #tv shows #dc #sara lance #ava sharpe #spooner cruz #behrad tarazi #zari tarazi #constantine #astra logue #nate heywood #avalance #im also hating zari x john less

[angrypedestrian]

THE TIME IDIOTS EPISODE 704 TITLED “Cirque du Stupid” MY THOUGHTS:

Not gonna lie I originally wrote that out as episode 503, just to show you where my brain is at currently

Anyways rip isn’t here jax isn’t here stein isn’t here snart isn’t here what’s the GODDAMN point

welcome back to dc’s legends of tomorrow during the last episode these bullet blondes were having an orgy

obvs the tarazis take turns with a strict schedule and sensory deprivation technology

KILL THE RACIST MAN ZARI

KILL HIM WITH YOUR WIND POWERS LIKE ZARI 1.0 DID BY TAKING THE AIR OUT OF THEIR LUNGS

an aside, behrad looking great in that hat

i realize i have not given out a Neal McDonough Memorial Can Get It Award yet this season!! A grave error and travesty on my part

Yeah it just goes to Shayan

also, these wigs? for legends standards? not as bad as they normally are!

well done costume department

these idiots are truly the dumbest people alive

speaking of idiots, the astra/spooner/gideon triangle rises again!!

i’m pretty sure this lady on the train is adam’s girlfriend? if i’m right, good for him!! she seems great and he seems like a very supportive partner and their dog is real cute

lol where is nic bishop did he get another job and can’t play every guest character this season?

i do not like this credit sequence any better than the last two year’s, it’s just a different kind of bad

the gang makes bath tub gin and kills all of Chicago

is jared padalecki singlehandedly funding walker? that can be the only way it has gotten a second season

gideon i love you

gideon learning that her knowledge just makes her come across as gay

which....yep all tracks

aw i’m glad behrad gets to have a good time jamming

zari i know you are grieving, but please fuck this man, i think everyone would be into it

once again, why does olivia need to do an american accent. there is literally no reason

haHA PHIL SPECTOR IS ROTTING IN HELL AND DON’T YOU FORGET IT

this money cgi....peak of technology....effervescent

actually i take it back, the Memorial Award goes to Shayan’s hair

...and also eddie and zari’s sexual chemistry

eddie no!!!!!

one of you blonde ladies be fucking useful!!!

ONE OF YOU BLONDE LADIES BE FUCKING USEFUL

what do you mean BUT HOW sara FIGURE IT OUT YOU FUCKED IT UP

KILL THEM ZARI

mushroom john from the afterlife being like do NOT fuck this man IN MY HOUSE

zari: i do what i want you’re dead mushroom man and we were never exclusive

john: yeah fair...can i watch

zari:...maybe

we’re putting on a show everyone!!!! everyone loves a show!!!

yeah that’s right ladies zari is going to make you be USEFUL

this man’s underbite is how you know he is a Bad Man

KILL HIM ASTRA

EVERYONE KILL THE MEN

astra take that jaunty beret and shove it down that man’s throat

zari does not need your affirmation gary

i am uncomfortable with nate and gary openly discussing being bottoms like this

this time i mean it i am fucking suing for emotional damages

warner brothers rearming those snipers as we speak

but also drag his ass gary

adam’s girlfriend already quarantined and is living in Vancouver bring her on the ship and make her a regular! the more the merrier!!

GALS and PALS

what’s better than this just gals being pals

hell yeah get every penny’s worth of the million dollars you’re paying amy an episode

you are paying her a million dollars an episode right?

RIGHT????

yeah of course she knows the fucking words spooner she knows everything she’s a fucking AI supercomputer from the FUTURE

she knows the whole timeline!!!!! that was like....a whole thing very recently for you all

zari you look great girl!! eddie doesn’t care!! he still wants to bang you!!

i do like that they’re really making jes and caity earn their salaries this year lol

where’s p!nk i know y’all could’ve gotten her if you tried

KILL HIM GIDEON

question did this man already have this stupid haircut or did phil make him get it. they seem equally likely

gar bear being here to talk means he is also a willing hole, and that’s beautiful

MY GIRL

It’s zari!!!!!!!!!!

YAYYYYYYYYY

Next week: ZARI FUCKING TOMAZ also yay we finally get to see matt again!

#legends of tomorrow #legends of tomorrow spoilers #the time idiots #my thoughts as i have them

[margoshansons]

Is it just me or does it feel like Ava is getting more screentime than Charlie? Even though this storyline is about Charlie. We got Ava talking about being a clone again (which is very unoriginal for DC) but we barely know what Charlies life as a fate was like. Yes Maissie had scheduling conflicts but they should have taken that into acount before maling the season about her.

TBH, I don’t think Phil gives a shit at all. I think they had a completely different idea of how this season was gonna go and then Crisis happened and they probably got their budget cut. 

Or they didn’t want to go the traditional route of exploring the ramifications of Space Time after Crisis and just decided to create their own idea. 

You’re absolutely right! I haven’t seen Maisie as much as I would like to and I think they honestly wasted the whole ‘Loom of Fate’ storyline. It sucks because I’m really into Greek Mythology and they could’ve done it in a much better way. 

I think Phil was facing a lot of issues with production and schedules. Especially after forcing Brandon and Courtney to leave. Legends is one of those shows that is a good jumping off point for several actors, or a nice way to get an actor’s name out there again. Caity wanted to start directing, and then Maisie had some scheduling conflicts, so he had to find the main character of the show again.

(even though it’s always been Sara and if Melissa Benoist can direct herself, I don’t see why they needed to have Caity physically absent for those episodes)

Unfortunately with Brandon gone and Caity directing, that leaves Ava as a default second because she’s the closest thing they have to a captain. 

It’s no accident that a lot of the original Legends aren’t there anymore. It’s becoming a way for the CW to place their own original superheroes in the spotlight. It’s not an accident that Sara is getting less screentime, nor Mick having an entire C plot regarding his daughter. 

Even Nate, who would be the third oldest left, has been getting less and less screentime. Phil and the producers are clearly trying to make Legends a more original show, almost divorcing it from the arrowverse entirely. 

So yeah anon, I’m upset about it too. They clearly just wanted to push this season out instead of coming up with something that works in tandem with the rest of the arrowverse. 

I think if they had kept Astra as a villain I would be enjoying this more, cause I was really excited at the end of season 4 to see all the encores, and what exactly Astra’s plan was. Now that we know it was just to torture John Constantine....there’s nothing there anymore. 

They tried to do too much by incorporating the Fates and it’s just gonna be another storyline they’re gonna brush over after the season’s over. Like Nora as a fairy godmother or Zari as a totem wielder.

#legends of tomorrow #Anonymous

[janetbrown711]

“Just because you don’t see the problem doesn’t mean something isn’t wrong.” Huey Dewey Louie webby

Huey woke up with a headache and his body aching from all over. He rubbed his forehead as he sat up to see if he could remember anything that happened the previous night, but he came up with no answers. He looked around his room and shuddered as he felt a chill go down his spine.

It had been two weeks since that terrible fever dream of Webby. It still lingered and haunted him, but he knew he really couldn't do anything about it. This was his life now.

She was his life now.

"Clari, have you seen my phone?" Huey asked upon not seeing it on his dresser as usual.

"It kept blowing up last night so I put it away so you could stay focused," she replied from the shower.

Right.

"Can I have it back?" He sheeped.

"After I look through who's been texting you," she said.

"But that won't be for awhile. You're going out today, right?" Huey got up and stretched.

"Yes, but if you love me, you'll manage," she said in her 'I'm just teasing' tone. Huey sighed and went out to the kitchen where he started to make himself some breakfast. Clarisse emerged from the shower ten minutes later with her hair blow dried and all ready to go out.

"Leaving already?" Huey asked.

"Thanks for breakfast," she stole a piece of his toast and kissed him on the cheek.

"That uh-" Huey tried to correct.

"Ah, ah, ah. I'm too busy to hear it. See you at Gander's at six," she kissed him again and ran out. Huey rubbed his face and restarted his breakfast. He never remembered feeling this tired ever before in his life. Guess that was adulthood. And drinking probably. He still couldn't place why on earth his joints would be so stiff today though. He thought he had a good night with Clarisse last night. Maybe he got into a fight? Seemed unlikely, but Clarisse has said it happened before.

Still. Something was off.

As he tried to recall any bit of detail from the night he heard a knock at the door, which was really, really unusual. He almost never got visitors nowadays. They were banging o. the door so loudly too. It made his headache even worse. He shushed the door as he walked over and opened it.

"Hello..?" He mumbled, rubbing his face.

"Huey..." it was Webby. Almost exactly like how she was a week ago. Huey rolled his eyes.

"Great. You again," he crossed his arms.

"Huey, I- what? I-i haven't been here," she gripped her bag.

"So you're real?" He looked her up and down.

"I could ask the same of you," Webby let herself in.

"Hey, I didn't say-" Huey tried to stop her.

"You didn't need to," Webby brushed him aside before looking around the room and gasping.

"This is so much worse than Dewey could've ever described it," she whispered to herself.

"Webby, what're you doing here?" Huey crossed his arms. She looked him up and down and she looked as though she were on the verge of tears.

"Huey where the hell have you been? What have you been doing?" She asked with earnest.

"I've been fine, I'll have you know," he suddenly got defensive. He didn't know why though. He knew this wasn't... well... normal.

"Huey... take a look at yourself here. You look absolutely terrible. You have a giant bruise on your forehead, you look like you haven't slept in days, your shirt has the weirdest stains on it, and you and your apartment reek of booze. What happened?" She grabbed his hand but he jerked away. He didn't answer. He hadn't noticed the bruise. Maybe he did get into a fight.

But with who...

"Huey... talk to me... to us... please," Webby pleaded.

"Why do you care all of the sudden?" Huey snapped.

"Huey, you missed Christmas a-and New Years, and Spring Break. You even missed your birthday. What the hell has been going on here?!" Webby snapped right back. Huey stopped. That definitely, one hundred percent, was not like him at all.

He remembered the holiday season. Lots of eggnog. Clarisse got him strange presents. He just got her earrings. New years was a hot mess. He forgot the whole say for awhile.

His birthday though.

He never would've forgotten his birthday. He hadn't seen his brothers in a year he shouldn't have-

He hadn't seen his brothers in a year.

He hadn't seen his brothers in a year.

"Huey? Y-you okay?" Webby asked much more quietly than before. He felt light headed. Like he was going to pass out. He stumbled back, fumbling past bottles on the ground. He caught himself on a countertop in the kitchen.

He hadn't seen his brothers in a year.

"Huey? Are you okay?" Webby asked, her hand hovering over his shoulder but she didn't dare to touch him.

"I'm fine. Nothing's wrong. I'm fine," there was the defensiveness again. It was like he lost control of his speech and he was now nothing more than a ragdoll controlled by someone else.

“Huey..." her tone was so soft and comforting, but he didn't dare to nuzzle into it and listen. He shook his head.

"Me and Clarisse have been having a perfectly good time. She's been showing me around and we've been having a great time. There's nothing wrong with staying home with her for the holidays," Huey defended his actions.

"But it isn't like you," Webby exasperated.

"Well this is me now! Whether you approve of it, or not!" He shouted. Webby stepped back, cowering. Her face looked hurt, like a wounded animal. She shook herself out if it though.

"Just because you don’t see the problem doesn’t mean something isn’t wrong," she straightened herself out.

"I-i know who you really are Huey, and this sure isn't it. You need to tell me what's going on. You texted us, all of us last night, about how you wanted me to come over and talk when we all were asking why you didn't come home for your guy's birthday. Please... i deserve to know what's going on," she spoke so gentile and quietly, so... opposite of what he had been hearing for forever... it was like honey for the soul. She touched his arm lightly but he jerked away again, involuntarily throwing himself into the wall. He fell down and started to cry.

"Huey! I-I'm so sorry!" She went to him again.

Sorry.

Sorry.

Oh, he missed that word.

He missed that word like he missed lazy days in a summer afternoon.

Soon he couldn't keep it in anymore and he bawled. His whole body trembled as his whole body gave in to the sobs. He felt Webby hold him gently and soothingly. She didn't grasp him tightly or snap at him. She hugged him and rubbed his back and told him it was okay.

It was okay.

Oh god, how he missed that feeling.

That feeling of just... calm and hope and peace and just... everything being alright and not having to fear upsetting anyone and just... being... okay.

Eventually his tears ceased and he was able to be taken to his couch so he could talk again.

"Do you want to tell me what's been going on? It's okay if you don't, I'll still be here. Dewey isn't far if you'd prefer to talk to him," she offered.

"No... if i don't tell you now, i don't know of i ever will," Huey took in a deep breath. Webby nodded and waited for him to be ready.

"Her... her name is Clarisse. Met her shortly after the Turaco situation. I had just broke up with Caity so i-i was feeling pretty alone s-so i agreed to go out. God, that feels like forever ago..." he chuckled as he wiped away tears streaming down his face. Webby offered a tissue but he shook his head.

"She introduced me to... so many different things and I knew so little about her, she fascinated me. I-I felt like I needed to stay- to know her better. A-and soon enough she was dragging me into all these things i didnt think i-i was ready for- a-and now I'm here and m-my whole body aches a-and i can't remember anything that happened at all l-last night a-and i just don't know what t-to do because I'm her everything now a-and sh-she says she-she'd die without me- a-and... a-and," Huey choked on his sobbings, shaking his head uncontrollably.

"Huey... I... am so, so sorry that ever happened to you. Nobody should have to deal with what you're going through," Webby wiped away her own tears.

"No," he shook his head, "it's my own fault. I said yes, she isn't to blame."

"Huey, listen to me and you listen good," she tilted his chin lightly.

"Nobody has the right to force into things you aren't okay with and no one should ever threaten you or yourself if you want to break up, okay?" She said. He couldn't speak again, so he slowly nodded instead.

"Can I hug you?" She asked. He nodded. She hugged him in a way that was so familiar, it brought him back home. He embraced it tightly, not wanting to let go at all.

"Huey, we need to get you out of here as soon as possible, you understand?" Webby said.

"I-i can't just leave her-"

"Huey, for your own good, you need to," Webby looked him in the eyes and he knew it was true. He was just... scared. She always had so many friends. And they were everywhere. He didn't know how she did it. Heck... she'd probably notice Webby was here and accuse him of cheating again.

"She'll know you've been here," he added.

"She can't hurt you anymore if you come home with me. It'll be okay. I'm a trained spy. She can't hurt you if you just come with me," Webby smiled reassuringly. Huey was still hesitant to believe it.

"I-i can't... I'm sorry... i can't," he closed his eyes and turned away.

"Huey, please. It's killing me to see you this way," she begged.

"I can't undo what she's done. Like you said I-I'm not myself. I'm a sloppy, good for nothing drunk," the words were heavy on his tongue.

"Huey... i know you. You're a hard, determined worker who never gives up on any one or anything and life by the book. You are incredibly loyal and loving, and you're always looking out for your little brothers, even when they don't ask you to. You are a huge dork who loves to read and write and explore and learn. You love your family and your family loves you. Please Huey... come home," Webby begged and pleaded a final time. Huey sniffled.

Could he really do this? It wasn't something he truly pondered before. It never felt possible. He felt like she would kill him if she found out. Well... she would find out no matter what he did. Was running away really the best option?

Huey turned and looked at Webby. She was looking at him in a way he hadn't ever seen Clarisse look at him.

It was a look of love. Familial, sure, but love. She cared about him and his wellbeing.

Clarisse...

Clarisse... not as much.

"Okay..." Huey spoke.

"O-okay?" Webby didn't seem to believe it.

"Y-yeah," he sniffled and laughed a bit. He didn't know why he did, but he did. Worry melted away from Webby's body and she hugged him once more.

"I'm so glad to hear that. Trust me when I say everyone at home missed you so so so much! We were all worried sick," she let go, "you need to get packing. We have to leave before she comes back."

"Right... yeah..." he got up from the couch. Once webby was standing he hugged her again.

"Thank you so, so, so much Webby. I promise I won't let you down," he said.

"You can never let us down. We all love you very, very much Huey. Don't forget that."

"I won't."

#huey duck #webby vanderquack #my fics #tw mature #mature #clarisse eider #ducktales #abuse #emotional abuse #tw: alcholism #tw: alchohol mention #part 1 #technically part 2 #adult ducks

[haledamage]

Pairing: Female Cousland/Nathaniel Howe

Story Summary: Cathain Cousland had been in love with Nathaniel Howe for as long as she can remember. It doesn’t take long after they reunite in Amaranthine to realize she still is.

Chapter Summary: The party makes it to Blackmarsh and regret it almost immediately.

Hey, so I posted this on Friday as a text post, but for some reason tumblr decided to hide it from everyone and make it not show up in the tags. So I’m posting it again like this in the hopes that it won’t be invisible. Text under the cut if you’d prefer to read here instead of ao3

Cait was awoken the next morning by Byron’s sloppy puppy kisses on his triumphant return to camp. He climbed all over her, tail wagging furiously, until she was able to push him away enough to sit up.

She rubbed his ears as he nuzzled at the poultice on her forehead. “Hey, buddy. Did you finish your mission from Nathaniel?” He barked happily and she laughed. “Good boy. Who’s my fierce Grey Warden? Who’s the best pup in Ferelden?” Byron rolled over on his back so she could pet his belly. “That’s right! It’s you!”

He wouldn’t leave her side all morning. She had to eat breakfast, change into clean clothes, and buckle her armor back on with Byron’s shoulder pressed hard against her hip. He didn’t back off until they were on the road again, and even then only far enough that they wouldn’t trip over each other.

They walked at a slower pace today than the day before, wary of another ambush, but the conversation flowed easily enough. It wasn’t much different than her travels before; different faces (except Oghren), but the camaraderie was familiar. Last time she’d traveled in a group this small, though, had been after Lothering, and she missed the comparative safety of a larger group. At least this time her friends mostly got along. Compared to trying to travel with Alistair and Morrigan at each other’s throats, being Commander of the Grey was a walk in the park.

“You know, Oghren,” said Anders cheerfully, “maybe we should get you a shield. While it’s only the four of us, you might be more useful as a meat shield than… whatever you call it that you normally do.”

“You know, Anders,” Oghren said, less cheerfully, “maybe we should get you a set of armor so you won’t fall apart like a wet paper bag if a darkspawn walks too close to you.”

“Maybe we should get Nate a sword,” Anders added.

Oghren giggled. “Heh heh, do you think he knows which end to hold?”

“Would you like to find out?” Nathaniel growled.

“Nah,” Oghren was laughing so hard now he stumbled, almost collapsing to the road. “Wouldn’t want to make the Commander jealous.”

They were still a day out from the Blackmarsh, and even though it was early afternoon the sky grew darker with every step. It felt heavy, like a storm was coming, but the darkening sky remained cloudless. The ground started to feel softer, springy under Cathain’s boots, and the air smelled of still water and rotting vegetation and something sour that stood out from the normal marsh scents.

Cait stepped up to the front of the group, where Nathaniel had taken the lead. He had his bow in hand, sharp eyes on the thickening woodland for anything amiss. She waited until he glanced her way until she said anything; he looked liable to jump at the slightest provocation.

“What do you remember of Blackmarsh?” She asked quietly. Something in the air made her want to whisper.

“Ghost stories,” he replied in the same hushed tone. “Tales Adria and your Nan used to tell us to keep us out of it. I never really thought there was anything to them until now.”

“Is that why I could never convince you or Thomas to come exploring with me? You were scared of ghosts?” A bird exploded out from a nearby bush, startled out of hiding by their passage. Cait gasped and reached for her blades, her heart hammering against her ribs.

Nathaniel steadied her with a hand on her shoulder. His laughter was warm in her ear. “Yes, how silly of us, to be scared of ghosts. Would that we all had your fortitude.”

“I’m just saying,” Cait said. She stepped away from him reluctantly, trying to ignore the prickle of Oghren’s and Anders’ stares on the back of her neck. “Going to explore a spooky swamp would have been an excellent excuse to have two or three days alone.”

“Then you should have led with that then,” Nathaniel practically purred at her, “or left your friends at home now.”

Cait stared at him slack-jawed. “You are a cruel and wicked tease and I hate you,” she told him with no real heat behind it.

His laugh pushed back the encroaching darkness a little.

——-

It was two hours past full dark when they finally stopped to rest, though it had been dark long before the sun had set. The gibbous moon hung large and nearly full in the sky, but none of its light seemed to make it down to their little fire.

They set up camp in silence, the shroud over Blackmarsh stifling conversation as quickly as it started. Cathain hoped they wouldn’t be there long, that they wouldn’t need to spend a night in the swamp itself. The shadow of the marsh felt like a living thing, like icy fingers on her neck. She found herself twitching at the smallest breeze, as if even the air and trees were her enemies, and saw the same niggling fear in her companions’ eyes.

Once the stew was started, Cait turned to find a place to sit down and nearly ran right into Anders. He grabbed her shoulders to keep her from falling into the fire, looking startled for only a moment before his face rearranged itself into a familiar sly grin. “Throwing yourself at me already, Cait? What will the others think?”

When she didn’t push him away immediately, still trying to regain her balance, Anders stepped a little closer. He grabbed her chin in one long-fingered hand and gently but firmly forced her eyes to his. Those eyes didn’t hold any of the smile still painted across his face, and he studied her shrewdly, almost clinically.

“Are you going to kiss me, mage?” Cait whispered, because it’s what she knew he wanted her to say.

“Only if you beg for it, Commander.” He stared at her for another long moment before abruptly releasing her as if it had never happened. “Looks like you’re mostly recovered from your incident yesterday. How’s your head?”

“Attached. Bit of a headache, but I can function through it.” She stood where he had released her for a second, getting her bearings. Just when she thought she had a handle on who Anders was, he did something like that. She shook herself and sat down on the nearest seat by the fire. “You could’ve just asked, you know. You didn’t have to get all handsy.”

“You’d just lie. You’re lying about it right now, in fact. Besides, how could I miss out on the look on his face?” Anders nodded behind her. Cait followed his gaze to Nathaniel, who was past the edge of camp gathering firewood. He was too far away to hear them talking, most likely, and he was frozen just outside the light from the fire. The look on his face was… complicated. “Your boyfriend looks like he’s about to have an aneurysm.”

“He’s not my–” Cait started, an old habit, but Anders interrupted with a scoff.

“He wants to be. You want him to be. I’m not stupid, Cait, despite appearances.”

“It’s not like that. It’s never been anything… official.” She thought back to summers past, sneaking into his room after everyone was asleep and back to her own bed before dawn, stealing moments in shadowed alcoves.

Cait pried her eyes away from Nate back to the fire. She wrung her hands in her lap, suddenly restless. “His father would never have approved.”

“His father isn’t around anymore, if I recall.” He popped a piece of dried fruit into his mouth. “Just something to think about.”

“What’s something to think about?” Nathaniel asked gruffly as he joined them by the fire.

“I’m trying to convince our stubborn and illustrious leader to take tonight off,” Anders lied easily. He threw a piece of fruit at Nathaniel, who plucked it out of the air and threw it back. It hit Anders in the forehead. “Ow!”

Nate sat down across the fire from them. “Is your head still bothering you, Caitie?”

“It’s tolerable. Really. You all worry too much.” It was worse than she let on, a sharp spiking pain that increased in the bright glow of the fire, but she could tune it out enough to do her job so she wasn’t quite lying. Still, she was happy to latch onto the lie Anders offered. “And I already told you, Anders, I am not a child, and I don’t appreciate being treated like one.”

“I’ll make you a deal,” he sighed as if they actually had been having this argument for a while. He was a frighteningly good actor. “I’ll let you take a shift tonight, under the condition that you take first watch with Nathaniel instead of a watch on your own. You still get to be useful and I don’t have to worry that the concussion you still have - and I can see it in your eyes no matter how pig-headed you try to be - will cause you to lose focus while you’re alone.”

Oh. So that was his game. Cait felt backed into a corner. “I… deal,” she said through clenched teeth. “But for the record, I am fine.”

Dinner that night was a somber affair, the darkness so thick Cathain couldn’t see anything past their little circle of tents. Even Oghren was remarkably sober and silent, two things she’d never seen from him before. He went to bed immediately after he was done eating and, after more waggled eyebrows and pointed looks, so did Anders. Bryon settled at her feet with a weary boof.

As soon as they were gone, Nathaniel came around the fire to sit next to her. Byron put his head in his lap and he absently scratched the dog’s ears. “What is with him tonight?” He asked quietly, nodding toward Anders’ tent.

“He fancies himself as a matchmaker, apparently.” Cait sighed, too tired to try and come up with a convincing lie. “I guess they don’t teach subtlety in the Circle tower.”

“He’s about thirteen years late on that,” he chuckled. “I was under the impression that he knew that.”

Cait ignored the accusation in his tone, and said, “I think he’s read too many of those romance books Delilah liked to read. He’s disappointed I haven’t fallen helplessly into your arms.”

“I think I remember those books,” Nathaniel murmured, smile warm in the deep darkness. His voice shook with barely contained laughter. “Aren’t I supposed to be wearing a billowy shirt with the breeze fluttering through the hair on my chest? Perhaps while reciting poetry or staring longingly at the ocean?”

“You have chest hair now? Mmm, that’s new.” Cait pushed that image out of her head, lovely as it was. “I think the billowing shirt is supposed to be under your armor, which I remove with my dainty and trembling fingers. Probably while wearing a clinging silk dress.”

“Hmm, dainty, trembling, and helpless. If I had to pick three words to describe you…”

Cait covered her face with her hands to stifle her giggles. “I’ve never been very good at playing the damsel.”

“Aye,” Nathaniel chuckled, caught up in her laughter, “but I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

Cathain felt her face flush, pleased and embarrassed in equal measure. She started to undo her braid so she wouldn’t fidget, unplaiting it and combing it straight with her fingers. “Your accent’s gone a bit Marcher,” she said, to change the subject a little and fill the oppressive quiet.

“Has it? I suppose it makes sense, but I never noticed.” He scratched at his jaw, running his fingers over the layer of stubble accumulated from two days on the road. It seemed like the same nervous not-fidgeting that she was doing, and drew a fond smile to her lips.

“I like it. It's…” it helps remind me of how much time has passed, it makes you sound less like your father, it does interesting things to the butterflies in my stomach when you say my name “nice.”

He didn’t say anything in response. Instead, he just stared at her in the flickering firelight, looking like he was trying to solve a puzzle and the answer was written somewhere on her face.

Cait tried to stare back for a while, but the intensity and curiosity in his gaze left her flustered, so she turned back to the fire instead, trying and failing to see past it into the woods around them. The night may as well have been a wall of black stone; neither light nor sound nor wind penetrated it at all.

She gasped as Nathaniel’s warm, calloused fingers touched her cheek. Her hair had fallen into her face now that it was freed from its plait, and he pushed it gently back behind her ear.

“I’ve never seen your hair this long before,” he said softly. Cait could barely hear him over the pounding of her heart.

“I… haven’t had much opportunity to cut it.” Her face felt hot again and she had trouble meeting his eyes.

“I like it.” Nathaniel traced his finger along her jaw, leaving a trail of fire in its wake. “It’s nice.”

“You stop that,” Cait said, flustered. She pushed his hand away resolutely, but he didn’t let her back away entirely, catching her hand between his. He still had his archery gloves on and she still had her fingerless ones. The contrast between cool leather and warm skin was… intriguing.

“‘Shy’ isn’t a word I’d use to describe you either,” he said with a sweet smile.

“We are supposed to be working.” Cathain couldn’t look at him, but she didn’t try to pull her hand back. “I have enough trouble concentrating with this blighted headache, I don’t need you being…” she couldn’t think of a word, so she just waved her free hand in his direction, where he sat too close and entirely too pleased with himself, her mabari asleep halfway in his lap.

“Okay, okay. No more flirting tonight.” Nathaniel still sounded far too amused with himself. He released her hand, but didn’t stop staring. “It seems I’m a bit rusty anyway.”

Cait crossed her arms over her chest. “Right. I’m sure you didn’t have Marcher girls throwing themselves at you,” she said, and was surprised at the amount of bitterness she heard in her own voice.

Nate started to say something and she cut him off. She stood up abruptly and put a few steps of space between them. She said in a rush, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean… I’m just being grumpy. It’s none of my business anyway. I’m going to go walk perimeter for a bit, make sure nothing’s trying to sneak up on us.”

She stepped out of the light of the fire and into the solid night before he had a chance to reply.

——-

Cathain was awake just before dawn. It was a pretty normal occurrence for her - especially out on the road - and she was dressed and ready in time to join Anders in silence as the sun rose at the end of his watch shift. It didn’t do much to brighten the gloom of the Blackmarsh; even with the sun fully up, their camp was surrounded by deep twilight, but it at least pushed back some of the oppressiveness of the night.

Her headache hadn’t gone away. It settled as a dull throbbing behind her right eye. Anders gave her another once over, thankfully less hands-on without an audience, but couldn’t find any evidence of lingering injury. Most likely, it was an adverse reaction to the Blackmarsh itself; with luck, their business there would be done today and her head would clear as they left it behind.

She managed to do a passable job of avoiding Nathaniel for the most part, keeping conversation strictly on professional terms. The darkness helped; none of them had much energy to spend on conversation with the weight of the marsh pressing them down.

It gave her a lot of time to think. Too much time to think. She hadn’t really thought much about what Nate might have gotten up to in the Free Marches outside of training. He’d always been very serious, even as a boy, preferring quiet and solitude over the taverns his brother Thomas frequented or the balls and parties Delilah enjoyed.

But… well, 8 years was a long time. They had agreed not to wait for each other; they hadn’t known if or when he’d ever return to Ferelden, if she’d ever get the opportunity to join him up north. He hadn’t wanted to leave her with just 'someday’.

But she had waited. She was still waiting. Had he?

Cait’s feeling on the matter shifted wildly as they walked. Sometimes she was resigned: it didn’t matter what had happened before, it was in the past. Sometimes she felt possessive; she wanted to shove him against a tree and put her mouth and hands on him until he couldn’t remember any touch but hers. Sometimes, more than she would care to admit, she felt self-conscious. She wondered what kind of women he would have met in the Free Marches. Women like in the romance books they’d talked about, fair and dainty, with long flowing hair and soft hands that had never touched a sword.

She wore her hair down instead of braiding it back up. She hoped he’d comment, but he didn’t. All he did was stare; every time she looked his way, she found that he’d already been looking at her.

Around midday, they reached the swamp proper and progress slowed to a crawl. The mud sucked at their boots, the trees clawed at their hair and clothes, and every instinct Cait had screamed Run! Leave! Get out while you can!

She wished she was surprised when they found the first Fade tear.

“I hate the Fade,” she muttered vehemently. She crossed her arms defensively across her chest, tense for trouble as Anders did the Mage Thing, inspecting and hopefully repairing the rip in reality.

“What should we expect?” Nathaniel asked softly. He walked up to stand next to her as they watched Anders.

Cathain felt the weight of his hand on her back, one small point of connection. She didn’t move away. “If we’re lucky, just demons. If we’re unlucky, demons and weird shit. If we’re really unlucky, we get knocked unconscious and our spirits are sent into the Fade, where we have to deal with weird shit at the whims of a demon.”

“I feel like there’s a story there. Maybe you can tell it to me over drinks sometime.” His voice was very close, but she refused to look and see just how close he was. Distraction could be fatal right now, and Nathaniel Howe was nothing if not a tall, blue-eyed distraction.

She did feel warm and a bit giddy at the suggestion, though. She found her voice enough to say, “Okay. I’d like that.”

——-

Their second attempt at working together in combat went better. It helped that blighted werewolves were not subtle creatures. It helped also that they had expected to be attacked for days, since the darkness set in.

Cait and Oghren made a point to stay apart, harrowing the same enemy from opposing sides so one of them was always flanking. It gave room for Nathaniel and Anders to sling arrows and spells with impunity, and Bryon stood back to stop anything that tried to approach them.

“Did they bite or scratch any of you?” Cait asked once the last werewolf fell. She inspected the bodies as if they held a clue to the Blackmarsh’s mystery. They remained enigmatic. “We’re immune to the taint, but not the werewolf curse.”

“We’re all fine, Caitie,” Nathaniel said, tense and alert for more enemies. “I don’t think we should dally here.”

He was right, of course, and they moved on as quickly as they could. Cait really hoped Kristoff hadn’t actually come here. She’d really like to find a living person at the end of one of these wild goose chases for a change.

She wasn’t so lucky. Kristoff’s camp was only recently abandoned. A few days, maybe a week at most. Long enough for dust and debris to settle in his cot, for the embers of his fire to burn out, but his tent still stood and the things within it - notes, a chest with a few simple belongings, a couple days’ worth of food - hadn’t been reclaimed by nature or predator.

Cait tucked his notes carefully into her bag and sighed. “I’m sorry, Kristoff.”

Nathaniel’s hand found her shoulder again, gave her a warm squeeze. “We might still find him.”

“Yeah,” said Anders, sounding much less optimistic than Nate. “Maybe he found what he was looking for and left. Maybe he’s back at Vigil’s Keep right now wondering where you are.”

She touched Nate’s hand briefly before she stepped out of his reach. “Your optimism is noted and appreciated. I hope it serves you for a very long time.”

The town that had once been here was clearly abandoned, the buildings long since rotted away to skeletons and husks. It did not, however, feel empty. It felt as alive as if the entire population had just stepped out for lunch. Which, Cait supposed, was what the ghost stories said. That they all disappeared one day but their spirits still lingered.

She kept looking over her shoulder as they walked, catching flashes of light and movement in the corner of her eye. She tried to convince herself it was the trees or the sun glinting off the water, but there was no wind to blow through the bare branches of the trees, and the sun was hidden behind deep clouds and didn’t reach the still lakes.

Everything in this marsh was creepier than the last. A huge, mostly intact dragon skull. An ominous ring of tall stones with a pedestal in the center, untouched by the ravages of time. A scavenger hunt leading to a proposal, a glimpse into the lives and love of people long gone.

Cait held the ring in the palm of her hand. The gold was still untarnished, the green stone set in it clear and bright. “I wonder if she would have said yes,” she mused.

Nathaniel’s voice was soft, contemplative. “Maybe they’re still together, wherever they are.”

“You are such a romantic,” Cait murmured, much more fondly than she’d intended.

“One of us has to be.”

Cait slipped the ring on her finger. It fit. She stared at it, fascinated. It made her feel strange in a way she couldn’t quite understand. Like catching a glimpse of herself in another life.

She caught Nate watching her and removed the ring and shoved it in her pocket, embarrassed.

Not much farther along the trail, they found a body of a Grey Warden - and something much, much worse. They were like giant grubs or maggots with almost human-like faces. If humans had mandibles like a spider and too many malicious, beady black eyes. They were in her blood, clearly darkspawn, but the pitch was wrong. Not the warm hum of her fellow Wardens or the buzzing undercurrent of normal darkspawn, but a high pitched whine that sent chills across her skin.

One of them tackled her, much faster than they should be. She got a dagger up into its mouth, stopping its mandibles from clamping down on her arm. Oghren brought his axe down on it, bisecting it in one blow and only barely stopping short of getting her as well.

In the wake of these… monsters came something even worse, because that was apparently the kind of day Cait was going to have. A hurlock approached them and, like the one that had almost killed Varel, introduced himself. The First.

He spoke haltingly, with a mouth not made for human languages. Of a Mother, of The Children, of big problems about to fall on the heads of those Cait had sworn to protect.

She drew her blades and The First raised his hands and Cait discovered that her day could actually still get worse.

She stared up at the hazy, grey-brown sky, at the Black City always in the distance, and said with every ounce of rage in her soul, “I. Hate. The Fade.”

“Are you sure you’re not a mage?” Anders asked, looking more comfortable than any of the rest of them. Maybe mages were more used to traveling the Fade outside of dreams. He leaned against a barrel that appeared to be floating a foot off the ground. “Because you must have some sort of psychic powers.”

“Yeah, it’s called 'deja vu,’ Cait grumbled. She put a hand on Oghren’s shoulder to steady him as he silently freaked out. She wondered if the Fade looked different to dwarves, since they couldn’t come here in dreams like others could. She wondered if he was the first dwarf to ever walk in the Fade. She’d ask him about it later, once they had stone under their feet again.

"So we just… need to find the demon at the center of this and kill it?” Nathaniel asked, wary but surprisingly composed all things considered. “Or find The First?”

“There’s usually a trick to it,” Anders said. “Something like… the exit’s through a small hole and you need to turn into a mouse to escape. Or you have to find the demon and convince them that sending you home is their idea.”

“Or we can just go join that mob over there,” Cait pointed toward a gathering of spirit villagers, torches and pitchforks at the ready. “The demon’s probably keeping them there too.”

They walked through the town of Blackmarsh-That-Was, the buildings tall and clean, chickens and townsfolk alike ignoring their passage. No children, that was weird. Down an alley, Cait saw a man being dragged off by unseen hands; that was weirder.

And weirdest of all, the one inciting the mob was a Fade spirit.

That’s what he had to be. Cait remembered Wynne’s tales of the spirit of Faith that had saved her life and of other spirits that represented positive traits - charity, valor, compassion. As this spirit clearly was not human and also didn’t resemble any demon she’d ever met, she felt comfortable with the assumption.

She hoped he was what he appeared to be, but… well, worst case scenario they were still trapped here. Best case, they made a new friend and they all got out of here alive. She’d take her chances.

#nathaniel howe #cousland/nathaniel howe #dragon age #dragon age awakening #dragon age fic #cait cousland #cait/nate #rhi writes #cait and nate have the opposite problem of kai and aloth #in that they keep wanting to blurt out FEELINGS and have to remind themselves they've only been reunited a month #I hope people can see this one #I thought it very strange that literally no one even acknowledged it before #shoulda known it was tumblr bs

[helloamhere]

Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen’s epic bromance makes up for most of the assfuckery that the films put their characters through. Theyre so cute and wholesome and I love them. But god the films could be SO GOOD if they focused on the main chore characters and their relationships (not who they’re screwing just their bonds with each other) rather than trying to throw all these BIG NAMES into the film. And I’m still bitter that JLaw became THE FACE of the franchise by shes hot and blonde and FAMOUS

Have you ever read Caity Weaver’s profile of Patrick Stewart? Delightful if I can look past my searing jealousy about getting to take a Brooklyn walk with Patrick Stewart!! omg, the pivot to jlaw as the center was so obvious and so weird in that series. They didn’t even sustain it! They tried to make it a crisis of identity and personal emotions about her physicality right, which like I could’ve gotten behind if they had done a better job but they already had SUCH A BETTER STORY with the larger philosophical conflict! So bitter with you!!  WHEN will Hollywood/or whatever/ ever realize that some of us are in it for the “raggedy found family tries very hard to be good even though they don’t know what good means”! 

#cherik anon! #cherik distress #so many xmen feelings #sigh

[canaryatlaw]

alright well today was pretty good, all things said. I’m obviously still dealing with some of the fallout from yesterday’s events (or event I suppose) but I’ve been trying not to dwell on it because what’s done is done and there’s not much I can do about it now. It’s just annoying because I really don’t care about no longer actually having the job as I just feel hurt that it happened and I was deemed not good enough, even if I know there were other forces at work here I can’t help but think I must’ve fucked something up and like, that’s really hard to hear when I’d been working my ass off for weeks to do the best I can.....I don’t want to dwell on it though, it won’t help anything and just get me more worked up. anyway, today. I woke up at like 10:30ish (10:32 I believe) and got up to go to the bathroom but also checked my phone because I had a sense I would have a message (I always know) regarding hanging out and I did, I was still kinda sleepy though so I said give me till 11, but then I couldn’t fall back asleep and just ended up playing with kitty for a while before getting up. so I went to meet Jess at the usual place for brunch. I didn’t grab a hat for some reason and it was snowing quite a bit (like the clumps of falling snowflakes were rather large) so my hair ended up being like, wet by the time I got there lol. we don’t usually end up going around this time so for the first time ever we had to actually wait, but it was only like ten minutes and I just increasingly took candy from their bowl and put it in my jacket pocket the longer I stood there 😂 and then we got to sit at a booth where we always are and the waitress was legit just like “the usual?” and we just laughed and said yes, because we have gotten to that point where they know our orders perfectly. so we ate and talked and all that good stuff before going back to my place where we started with a few episodes of Sabrina but then stopped after one was particularly creepy and frankly disturbing (the sleep demon one) so we then marathoned the rest of the episodes of the Korean competition show that created the band that we’re now apparently fans of, and it was at least rather entertaining, I will give it that, and from what I’ve seen there’s more footage of them having to do ridiculous tasks that will also be entertaining so I can be down with that. After surmising that sadly we cannot get taco bell to deliver to us (it’s cold, okay) we ended up going with pasta from a place that also let us get soda because if I didn’t get some caffeine I was gonna pass out on the couch 😂 later of course it did occur to me that I could’ve just used some caffeine gum, but oh well. Once we finished the reality show we watched a few clips of them doing ridiculous tasks that were entertaining before finally getting around to watching last week’s Supergirl being that we are getting a new episode tomorrow that we’re presumably watching so we needed to be caught up. It was.....not great. Honestly they are just going SO HARD on the anti-alien narrative that is a honestly a great parallel to our current political climate but like, it’s getting to the point where it’s somewhat disconcerting to watch because you can tell they’re trying to get you to at least somewhat sympathize with the anti-alien people and like.....for me that’s so far out of bounds for what could be considered okay and I feel like it’s really not helping anything going on in reality right now. It’s not doing anything productive, it’s just kinda stoking the flames and getting people riled up, and I don’t like that, so I’m really not crazy about this season so far and I don’t know if that’s gonna change anytime soon. sigh. after Supergirl Jess headed home and I decided to watch Crazy Ex-Girlfriend that somehow always ends up at the bottom of my recorded list so I’m like, 3 weeks behind on it, and I started on the oldest one. that show is just like....it’s just exactly my life lol and honestly all the lawyer stuff kinda made me sad for the moment but it passed rather quickly. and after that I started getting ready for bed. a few other notes on things throughout the day, it occurred to me that HVFF San Jose is rapidly approaching and I no idea whatsoever what I was going to cosplay, I had been planning on doing a ton of Sara Lance cosplays this year at different cons (like all the outfits she wears) but since Caity’s been not doing as many cons I haven’t wanted to really do them without her there. but, Katie Cassidy is going to be there, and I mean, if Sara is out of the running my next favorite would of course be District Attorney Laurel Lance, because I just like her so much and have apparently become a stan of her in Caity’s absence. so all that to say that I’m doing the white suit look from 7x02. I already have white pants, and I was able to get a white blazer that looks like hers (they had the exact one of the arrow fashion site but it was, you know, $695 so I decided to go with a knock off instead) for pretty cheap, and I figured out the shirt she was wearing under it because she uses it in another scene later on (they’ve repeated a few of her shirts lately) and was able to find one close to that fairly easily, and I already have the wig so it works. I still have to figure out what my cosplay will be for the other day, Jess is rooting for me to dress as a bulletproof coffee mug to harass Brandon which honestly is not a terrible idea, but we’ll see. Alright friends, I think that’s all I got for now. Church in the morning, attending the 10 am and in with the babies for the 11:30. Since they moved the service times again (it’s because they’re trying to accommodate as many people as possible by trying to make the times such that there’s a more even spread of people at each one, but it’s still kind of irritating) I get half an hour less sleep on Sundays, but for now anyway it looks like I’ll have at least a few days to sleep in, so that’s not that big of a deal for now anyway. Should be good, and yeah I’m good to go now. Goodnight my loves. Hope you had an awesome Saturday.

#daily journal #November 2018 #Jess tag

[abberryyang]

Thing I never get is for people who believe Sara's best time was being Canary and that she is the true Black Canary is how Sara says that The Canary was never that positive for her. An assassin is last thing BC is. There is just completely disconnect in my mind.

The Canary was never positive for her - ever.

And a lot of people can’t stand that, especially the fans who loved her character in that duration of her storyline. Listen, I don’t blame them for saying, “hey, this is when I loved the character” but they need to acknowledge that Sara hated herself during that time. Sara created orphans, widows, and was completely numb to it - a lot of this development, as a character, is completely done through exposition rather than flashbacks or just us seeing her do the actions. 

Even on the island, Sara took advantage of the Crazy Scientists infatuation for her, just so she could be safe, while she experimented on the other prisoners - as long as it meant keeping herself safe. Sara even gave away Slade, Shado, and Oliver’s location if it meant she would be safe - there is really no reason why anyone should like her character at this point in time. And honestly, that scene with the pilot was sooo forced, just so we could have Sara take in Sin, when they could’ve easily done a storyline for Laurel to adopt Sin. It just, wow.

Sometimes, I wonder if Sara really loved Nyssa or if she used Sara to ensure her safety from Ra’s. Of course, it may have developed to actual love later, but the amount of times Sara has left Nyssa “just because” VS just staying with her because Sara loves her. I just, wow, I can’t. Listen, I love Nyssara, but that is fucking problematic and is never addressed.

Sara is the definition of survival over morals. Sara has always been a character who’s motivation is her own needs, wants, and desires. A lot of times, we as an audience, along with all the characters, can’t tell when Sara is even telling the truth or a lie - she is a pathological liar when we meet her on the island and when we see her interact with her family and Oliver!

Honestly, as much as I love Sara, she is a completely selfish sister, who never deserved Laurel’s forgiveness and got it anyways. If it wasn’t for Laurel’s love of Sara, I would never, ever, like her until she moved over to Legends.

The main reason why people love Sara is because of Caity Lotz and what she brings to the character. Caity is a spunky girl, who is a tiny bad ass, with an innocent look to her, and she demands that her character is written with the justice that she always deserved but never got on Arrow. 

I just wish the development on Legends addressed her problematic behavior on Arrow, and how she’s changed from that - otherwise, she just seems like an entirely new character.

#anon asks #abberry answers #abberry rants #anti sara lance #caity lotz #anti nyssara #arrow

[tehkatie]

Okay I’m about to go on a tv show rant that no one will care about but I have to get this off my chest lol. Felicity Smoak will not die in Arrow (at least until the very end) and there’s so many reasons why not.

First, if they were going to kill her they one hundred percent could’ve done it in season 4 with a few little storyline changes. They had introduced Curtis who could’ve simply been an easter egg sort of character with his name like Felicity started out as in her first episode which was supposed to be her only one. He’s tech savvy just like Felicity and he totally could have replaced her space in Team Arrow. Okay maybe not replaced but stepped in definitely.

Second, it could’ve been used for emotional turmoil with Oliver. This show actually hated seeing my son happy so they could’ve used this as a catalyst to break him again. It would’ve been bad too because Felicity held a big part in helping him get back the humanity he lost in his five years of hell. Think of how many times he wanted to give up and she just wouldn’t allow him to do that. Yes Diggle tried but he was never as good at it as Felicity because he had his own baggage. So does Felicity but not as bad as either one of them.

Third, they could’ve switched Laurel’s death with hers. This would’ve been a way to make comic purists happy but let’s be real it would’ve been at the sacrifice of the entire show. Let me explain. Felicity dying could’ve made Oliver shelve the idea of love and all that entails what better person to break him out of that than seemingly the first woman he ever loved (even if he did cheat on her a shit ton). After Felicity dying they could’ve used what was left of season four to show Oliver avenging Felicity and then in season five they could’ve done a soft rebuild to Oliver and Laurel. But Stephen Amell and Katie Cassidy have as much chemistry as me with a cardboard box. Using her for this much of an emotional storyline would’ve have fell flat on its face let’s be real. I would’ve quit the show and I’m sure many others would’ve too.

Five, Sara. Felicity dying could’ve made Oliver kick Laurel off the team as a way of trying to protect her. I’ve brought up this point to my friend who I watch the show with and she’s asked me why not Thea? Thea can manage. Thea would not have let him kick her off it just would not have happened. Kicking Laurel off could’ve opened the door for Sara to come back in as Black Canary. They’d already brought her back and I’m pretty sure she didn’t leave for LOT yet. Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong. Anyway, Stephen Amell and Caity Lotz had enough chemistry for me to buy an emotionally charged storyline with them. And it would’ve again been a way of doing the Green Arrow/Black Canary relationship with it being one hundred percent their own.

Six, Dinah Drake and Black Siren. You could not make me even sort of believe that Oliver will end up with Dinah. Just absolutely not. They have no romantic chemistry for me in any way, shape, or form. Just no. I also can’t buy Oliver with new Laurel because once again Katie Cassidy and Stephen Amell have no chemistry romantic or otherwise and I can’t even fathom why she was cast in this role like just no. I don’t hate OG Laurel or new Laurel, I hate the way Katie portrays her. Point is Dinah or new Laurel are just not options to be honest. If they tried to do something with either I’d quit the show and again many other people would to.

And finally seven, killing Felicity now would be the suicide of the entire show. People say it already is but that’s not true for me. Well not after their rebuild in season five and relationship in season six. There’s no forced drama between them finally and that’s great. But I digress. It’d be the end, yes, because of shippers.

I can’t tell you how many people I know that stopped watching The Vampire Diaries After Nina Dobrev left. Fans I know of her and Damon, her and Stefan, Katherine and Damon, and Katherine and Stefan all tried to quit once they knew their endgames weren’t going to happen. They only tuned in because they thought season seven would be the last and they’d bring Nina back for the final episodes. It happened but not until a lucky shortened season eight. Season eight would not have happened without the viewership that they got in hopes that seven would be the final season. I digress because this is about Arrow.

That would be what would happen if Felicity died now. People would try to quit but since characters in this show have a way of not staying dead they would tune in for season seven again hoping it’d be the last and Emily Bett Rickards would come back for the final episodes of the series. They’d get another season and it’d likely be the actual end.

But anyway, I don’t know about anybody else but after everything that’s happened in these six seasons I could not buy Oliver with anyone else. In seasons four and five there could’ve been options but now absolutely not. Oliver and Felicity are endgame. I’m not the type of shipper that would be pissed at the show if at the end of the series they killed Felicity. Ultimately I know now that their endgame but I could still see her dying. She likely won’t but I would be able to understand if she did. But only if season six was redubbed the final season. I could see a flash forward to an older Oliver and an older William standing in front of Felicity’s grave and that’s how they end the relationship. Or even an older Felicity and William at Oliver’s grave. I could one hundred percent see Oliver finally sacrificing his life to save the ones he loves. He’s been talked out of it countless times but they could always introduce his biggest foe where there’s finally no choice but to die. Point is, he won’t be with anyone else now. Oliver has been in love with Felicity for nearly five years. Any other relationship for him now would be far too rushed especially if we only get lucky with maybe one to two more seasons.

Oliver and Felicity weren’t the intended endgame but because of the explosive chemistry that Stephen Amell and Emily Bett Rickards have they will be. People can disagree with me for sure but it won’t make my opinion change. I’m an expert at knowing endgame couples. Every couple I’ve called as endgame in every show I’ve watched on The CW has been correct. This one is too.

#katie af #tv show rants with me lol #arrow #olicity #arrow spoilers

[valeriemperez]

Hi Tati! I'm new in the fandom but I saw someone saying on twitter that the IW/WA fandom is quiet asf during this hiatus. The person said that during the last hiatus we were more active, we were out there advocating for Iris/WA in EP's/writers mentions, we were trying to get CP be nominated for awards and now seems like everyone gone. I don't know if it's true bc I was not here last hiatus and if this is true I'm very sad. You have that impression too? Thank you and sorry for my bad English.

I am not a fan of comparing in that way, but I will say: Candice is actually nominated for a Teen Choice award of her own this year (unlike last year), so there’s a perfect opportunity for you to get active if you’re worried. Just tweet “My #ChoiceActionTVActress is @candicekp #TheFlash” ten times day no matter where you live and vote here ten times a day if you’re in the US. 

We also have #CandicePattonWeek on Twitter, which just requires one tweet a day from you using these categories. You can @ Candice and send some to @flashtvwriters as well. 

And don’t forget about the EOnline TV Scoop awards. “Runnin’ Home To You” is in 2nd place here, Barry and Iris are in 9th places for best couple and 6th place for sexiest moment here, Candice herself is in 15th place for Best Drama Actress here, and you can vote for “Iris and HR switched places” here. Vote as much as you want for all of them.

Outside of things we can currently tweet about or vote for? Candice is nominated for a Saturn Award for the first time ever, “Runnin’ Home To You” will probably be nominated for an Emmy, and she’s doing more photoshoots than she was last hiatus. We’re never gonna be an army-like fandom the way some other CW shows are, but we don’t have to be as long as everyone who wants to participate in promoting Candice on social media does it in whatever way they can. Take Candice’s advice and don’t have to compare yourself to others as long as you’re doing what you can; honor your pace instead. ;)

@ “lois lane type” anon: 

I have thought long and hard about exactly the kind of question you presented, and as embarrassed as I feel asking it myself (because of who I am and not the question itself), I think it’s incredibly important to do. So yes, I will absolutely ask that of the producers as soon as I get the opportunity. Your last part could even be included in the question too, it butters them up like, “How does it feel to have accomplished _____ with your choices? And do you realize what an impact that decision has made on _____?” Hopefully that’s clear to you, haha.

I hope the tca’s are rigged in Candice and WA’s favor this year 😂

It’s already a miracle that they nominated her! And since Caity was nominated too, it would be fun to see the girls go together.

Oh, I want a LOT of Irisco stuff. It’d be funny if Iris and Cisco share a comical scene in regards to Cindy and Iris would be like “You idiot!” but at the same time, give him words of encouragement. LOL!

Aww, I would love that. Let’s hope it happens!

WA is secure. You don’t write a narrative at how Barry and Iris will always find each other, you don’t get a song specifically written for this couple, you don’t have them in multiverse and they are married (exception of musical where Iris was with Mo**l), you don’t give this couple two marriage proposals and you don’t have all this foreshadowing of Bart or children for this couple for them to say hey let’s give SB a shot. That makes no sense. SB are embarrassing themselves tbh.

Agreed, but it’s their time and they’re free to embarrass themselves as they wish lmao.

The writers aren’t interested in SB. They’ve had plenty of opportunities to explore them. During S1 while Iris was with Eddie. Barry could’ve hooked up w Caitlin in S2 instead of Patty. They could’ve done an AU SB on Earth 2 instead of married WA. Barry could’ve married or been dating Caitlin during FlashPoint instead of pursuing Iris. Hell even w Savitar. They could’ve had a Savitar/Killer Frost romance easily. They’ve passed on every chance to explore SB. They aren’t interested period.

Yup, they’ve have not shown any interest in pursuing romantic SB. Or in couple-swapping of any kind, for that matter. 

#the flash for ts #iris west defense squad #anonymous #tatiana's thoughts #more asks under the cut #long post for ts

[salemspoint-blog]

❝ I’ve been a saint, I’ve been the truth, I’ve been the lie. ❞

» Natalie Mercer » Thirty » Hunter » Deputy at Salem's Point Police Department » Caity Lotz

Physical Appearance —

Life on the run leaves no time for fashion or shopping. Natalie used to dress to the tens when she had previously lived in Salem. Always putting her best foot forward but since her Aunt’s return to her life and her decision to live under the shadows she started to dress simply. A simple shirt and some jeans were everything she was able to pack in her backpack, and it became her regular outfit. Her hair is always braided or in a pony tail, rarely does she let it down. Natalie never says more than she needs to. Rarely does she let someone in. She had a solid wall around herself and though she believes that there is nothing good left in her she does show compassion to people in her own way. When she talks to someone she is always listening to them and wanting to help them to the best way that she can. Her regrets and mistakes eat her alive but she is a silent person and if she was burning she would be the last one to point that out and would tolerate the pain. The anger has managed to shape Nat into someone that is short with her words and tends to express no emotions. She used to smoke whenever she was tense or stressed, it was the tell that gave her away but now that it is a constant state, she classifies herself as a smoker.

Personality Traits —

♦ Discreet, observant and resourceful ♢ Abrasive, destructive and determined

Biography —

Only a few people get to be left behind and disappear themselves. Natalie Mercer happened to just win that lottery. When she was eight years old she saw the last of her parents. It had been so simple and comical in the dark twisted way. They had just left to go get some groceries and never came back. Her aunt didn’t even hesitate to pronounce them dead. For the years coming up Natalie believed that was because nothing good happened in town. It wouldn’t be till much later that she would actually understand what had taken place. Eight years old she saw her entire life be packed up in a couple of gym bags and two boxes. The woman was then shipped off to Colorado with her aunt and other hunters. It should be noted that Natalie had always been the odd ball out. Even when she was young she had befriended the werewolves next door and promised them that no harm would happen to them if they didn’t hurt anyone. The brown hair girl never saw why there had to be hate towards what someone was and not what they had done. That was a trait that her aunt was not okay with. In fact, it was the one trait that she tried to claw out of Natalie with violence, physical and verbal abuse.

At a young age the woman took advantage of the young brunette and would often starve her and other times push her to murder whoever they captured. Whenever she asked about her parent’s whereabouts Natalie was isolated out of the camp for days. Natalie had believed that those days would come to an end when she didn’t get the blessing after all her parents were missing and no one gave a kid a blessing without their parents. That small hope that Natalie had been holding onto ended up coming crashing down on her when she turned seventeen, that was when her aunt requested that the blessing for her kids be placed on Natalie, after all, Natalie’s aunt wasn’t able to have kids so she was making damn certain that her legacy stood the test of time. So when the witches granted it Natalie stopped being some orphan that had been taking in. Instead, her aunt started to look at the brunette as property. As an investment that she did her best to protect with the constant training, sending her on hunts that she lacked experience, and pushing her to her limits.

Soon Natalie realized how to handle the situation. Natalie became everything her aunt wanted only in front of her. Behind closed doors, she was sick with herself, she did her best to not kill anyone that hadn’t committed a wrong, but at times she wasn’t able to choose. The guilt drove her to shut down. Even after her aunt murdered a childhood friend that managed to get bitten the hunter didn’t dream about crossing her. Natalie believed that this was normal after all this was the only family she had ever known. The hunter did not want to appear to be selfish. Her aunt could’ve tossed her aside and not want anything to do with her. But instead, she took in the complication that was Natalie and fed and bed her. That was until she met an older male in her early college years. The two were never supposed to be a thing. Everything about their relationship screamed that it would end up in flames. He had been honest and told her what he was from the start as she was. Honestly had never been a downfall of theirs. Just ask quickly as she met him she trusted him. Both were aware of how fucked up each others family was but she brought him home. For the first time standing up against her aunt and defying her. Their relationship was the first time that she was actually able to breathe again but it would be short-lived compared to the pain that was soon to come. Her aunt guilt tripped Natalie on going on a hunting trip that Natalie still wasn’t prepare for, not to mention she had just had finals and was not at her best. The hunter almost died in the hands of a vampire, she should’ve died was what everyone said but out of nowhere, she came back. When she came back home, she came back to an empty house, her boyfriend was gone. Without a note or an explanation.

The break up was the second emotional pang that she wished she could erase. Half the time she had been worried that something had happened. Then the other half she wished something did happen to him. Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, soon she realized that she had to close that chapter of her life. She joined the police academy which ended up being allowed only if Natalie ended up staying with a family friend. A friend that her aunt had trusted would make her into the ruthless hunter that her parents had once been. It never managed to become a reality because the family friend ended up being more like a brother to Natalie than a friend of her aunt. He was more than aware of the abuse that Natalie had suffered but neither of them ever talked about it. Besides the town was always throwing grenades at her for her to even contemplate being more ruthless than she was. During one of the curses, Natalie managed to discharge her gun ending the life of an innocent person. She placed herself on desk duty for the longest time till friends reached out and pulled her out. Then there had been the whole getting kidnapped incident. All these took place while she started to get close to someone else.

As a hunter, she took part in the hunter community right away. After all, she had connections with most of them and kept in touch. No one ever did see her second guess her kills or even regret being a hunter. Natalie didn’t go around telling people what they were doing wrong, she kept things to herself. But always was there when she was needed and never hesitated to have her blade cut deep into the monsters. A co-worker and fellow hunter soon were able to give her an update about her family. There was a lead that her parents had not died – instead, they had been bitten and ran away cause they knew their family would kill them. So they left Natalie behind and now they had two other daughters and a family within the same pack that she had once befriend when she had been younger. Her aunt ended up being proven right once again – she shouldn’t have dug around because the next thing that she could recall was being surrounded by three werewolves. It would be easy to plea self-defense but what she did to them was everything her aunt had taught her. That line that she had refused to cross all those years had been crossed that line. It wouldn’t go unnoticed, especially since her aunt managed to stumble upon the scene. Natalie didn’t know how to grasp the reality that her parents had been alive all these years and never thought to check up on her. That they had assumed that she would hate them like she had been taught versus giving her a chance. And now she had blood on her hands, she had become everything her aunt had demanded. She was not able to actually process the situation because her aunt’s grin ended up being plastered throughout her head. Her words echoing in her head. That provoked Natalie to turn to the witch and ask him to erase their memories. Saying that would be the last time he saw her. For whatever reason, he decided to agree and it was done.

The next months she had nightmares but turned to her new relationship to get rid of them. Natalie had foolishly thought that a memory wipe would be enough to bury her skeletons but life quickly reminded her of reality. Five years ago – during one of her patrol walks she was taken. The ride back to Colorado was a complete haze and the next image that she being back in that same hole when she had been 15. Quickly she lost track of the days and her entire focus was to survive the next obstacle her aunt could possibly think. When she was finally released she had realized months had passed by. It had felt longer and yet it had just been 120 days. It became obvious that she wouldn’t be able to leave. Her aunt managed to blackmail her into staying with the fact that there was a pack of werewolves that wanted Natalie’s head on a silver plate. It was not till Mikael, her nineteen-year-old childhood friend, managed to break down her door and plea to her to stop her aunt from killing his girlfriend that was a werewolf.

For a couple of days, the hunter was not going to do anything. After all, this was just the circle of life. This was a lesson that he had to learn in order to prevent any future pain. But after a bottle of tequila, she found herself thinking otherwise. That night she ended up turning against the hunters and protected Mikael’s girlfriend, which led to her becoming an enemy and being attacked. Natalie barely escaped the fight alive. She would’ve ended up dead if Mikael hadn’t called her ex into saving her. Which was an action that was going to change the course of Natalie’s life forever? At the same time her own family was going up in flames so was Lucas’s. One of his elders ended up confronting Natalie about her ex’s accident and things became violent when Natalie refused to answer anything which managed for Natalie to become physically violent with an elder. At the end of the day the entire apartment ended up being damaged and Natalie delivered the final stab to the witch. It was during that confrontation that she learned that her ex-had healed her that night that Mikael had called him. Natalie was in deep water with an entire pack wanting her dead, her former fellow hunters, and now her ex’s coven did too.

With the hot-headed individual that Natalie was, she told them all to come at her. Her ex, on the other hand, had another solution. He managed to propose to Natalie. Portraying the entire thing as a business deal, one where his family would get off his back about the future and his nasty habit of always protecting Natalie and one where the supernatural would think twice before going after her. Around this time Mikael ended up disappearing into thin air. Another thing that marriage to a witch would give was giving her access to tools that she didn’t have. Natalie tried to locate Mikael with her hunter skills but nothing worked. Instead, she ended up running into Jeremiah Ainsworth who managed to confess to Natalie that no one had looked for her after she disappeared and that they had all acted as if she had never existed. That the guy had moved on – it was the first time she had seen Jeremiah be so honest, and he confessed it was because he had also seen his own version play out the same. So after weeks of yelling at each other Natalie gave in and got married in private. For an entire day, Natalie and her ex-didn’t banter or become petty with each other. For one day Natalie wore a beautiful white gown. And it felt similar to the days when they had been each other’s best versions of each other.

For two years Natalie did the marriage thing. Natalie knew she couldn’t leave because of the enemies that she had managed to make outside. But every passing day that she didn’t hear from Mikael she worried more and more. Till the point where she couldn’t stay still anymore. Not like that was the only reason that she picked up her bags and left. Her husband’s family demanded too much from Natalie, things that she knew she would not be able to give. On top of that, her aunt had located her and managed to draw her out by threatening to kill Clark’s baby sister that had managed to get triggered. Natalie didn’t believe her but showed up to the location and there enough was Cammy being tortured to the fullest. The sight of the smaller Clark being abused by the same hands that she had, was enough for Natalie to let go of any fight and give into her aunt’s demands. So a deal was made with the devil – her life for Cammy’s, and Natalie accepted the terms after all she was given little choice but to leave and follow her aunt wherever she wanted.

But as soon as Natalie was able to escape from her aunt she did. And ever since then she has been on the run, with the help of Zeke she has been able to be one step ahead of her aunt and both have been working to locate Mikael. Interesting turn of events since she would have never probably trusted Zeke before and now he is the one that she is the closest with. It was during this time that she dyed her hair blonde, as a symbol of change. During the past three years, Natalie wasn’t able to be a law enforcement because her aunt knew all the connections and how to get info so she with the help of her previous friends she became a hire for kill during the mornings and a hunter at night, traveling throughout the country and killing supernatural beasts. There were moments when she needed help and would call Zeke to come and help her out. With the three years, she managed to go from an adequate hunter to a specialist. It was during this time that she would help people deal with their supernatural troubles for the exchange of money and food. The woman that had once dreamed about a family got used to living in a studio apartment and living on a paycheck.

The woman excelled at her hunter skills. She put all her focused on her hunting cause if she was going to be hunted for killing, then she was going to kill as many as she could. Though the blonde managed to make it into her own job she started to just haunt those that hunted others for no reason. She never checked on Salem because she didn’t want to be reminded of the people that she had managed to hurt. Her ex-was someone that she had hoped would’ve moved on and created a better life for himself. She never planned to go back but she started to get short and strange calls from Zeke, that allowed her to know that something was up. Then Natalie got a phone call that Clark’s sister was back in Salem and it was only a matter of time before her aunt came, so she decided to make the one phone call to Zeke to let him know she was coming back home.

#natalie mercer #takenf #c.hunter #caity lotz

[angrypedestrian]

THE TIME IDIOTS EPISODE 601 TITLED “It has been zero episodes since we did something fucked up with Gary” MY THOUGHTS:

Previously on The CW Presents Warner Brothers Characters We Don’t Care About BUT ALSO You Can’t Make Them Canonically Gay: I dunno, Tala got some kittens? They seem real cute. ZARLIE KISSED?????

How have you all been? Exhausted? Yeah same

Been a long year, and our reward....is this

I tried out the beta new post maker thing and they do NOT let you do nestled bullet points and I realize this because I am the only person who almost exclusively uses tumblr on desktop but I do not care! I need the nestled bullets!!!! So many of my stupid jokes are bullet point based!!

i NEED them for EMPHASIS

I would also like to thank NBC and The CW for really coming together so that I can watch my two favorite smooth brain shows back to back: LOT and Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist, perhaps our nation’s MOST smooth brained show

which is saying something. but they really put the work in to hold the title week in and week out and it must be respected

Anyways welcome back I am already so tired of everyone and everything related to this shit show, much like television’s dominic purcell

rip to him i truly hope the writers absolutely torture him this year

Lol he got the previously on of course

=( charlie thanks for the REMINDER show

can’t make anyone canonically gay who isn’t a new character but we can show a full frame shot of a bong

equality

“and several punks” gideon I know you don’t care for subcultures but you def know these people’s names you’re basically a god

WOW CAN’T BELIEVE I HATE THIS INTRO EVEN MORE NOW BUT I DO

i know this is an unpopular opinion but I don’t care!!! it sucks!!!

Zari noooooo you love him. You’re gonna love him

and luckily this show is silly and believes in love and will be the one relationship where john’s lover isn’t murdered or sent to hell or ruined or....insert some sort of befalling here

i like this

i will not entrench on @zaritarazi‘s beat re: mick and references to him fucking, that’s her domain please see her blog for that analysis

Yes I will be bringing back the Neal McDonough Memorial Can Get It Award and this week they will be going to the punk outfits obviously they are only rivaled by the western outfits

Oh boy legends uncanny ability to get the worst historical renactors continues

except for obama, that one was good

though the guy can do a good vocal impersonation i’ll give him that. but his chin is too weak

you can’t give us footage of charlie like this

MISS YOU

lolllllllllll homoromativity

this is what you get. you get sucked into a spaceship

a lesson for us all

zari’s bi bob is truly fantastic. well done everyone

god i wish i could’ve been in the room when phil and co came up with this nonsense

okay okay we need something to pitch to the network so we can keep our jobs wait i fucking GOT IT ALIENS

keto:....yeah sure fine why not

a binder is always a cry for help you know that girl

the checklist did make me laugh out loud

well that swing a dead cat line is some casual biphobia but ava is a lesbian what do you expect etc...

BUT LOLLLL like supergirl is gonna take your calls.

....can we get dreamer over on this show? that would be fun i would like that

zari 1 and 2.0 both openly loving men’s asses....you love to see

“I’M AN ASTROLOGER YOU NEED AN ASTRONOMER”

this is the stupidest thing i’ve ever heard put in the pantheon of top 10 lines ever spoken by any character

ava’s crushing realization that they are unfortunately experts vs. nate’s unending enthusiasm to be an expert

Behrad i love you so much and would never want to be near you if you were a real person

this large buff man seems very familiar but i can’t figure out why

well that’s this episode’s cgi budget

tho i am curious if they’ve finally gotten more money now that arrow and black lightning are over

caity fighting that alien: now that’s what i call...acting

alright she does have a point that being an Avenger is stupid

no good has ever come from that

we can afford an alien AND mick’s gun, wow yeah we do got a budget this year boys!!!

holy shit these alien looks are fantastic

now phil don’t sped all that money in one place

rip 2 dick hardbody he died like how he lived: hard

but for real these prosthetics actually look? good????

zari....what is your knowledge base of alistar crowley that you can say anything about him is common knowledge. genuinely curious here

hey, where IS gary. adam’s a regular this year right? i need that big doofy smile in my life!!

oh no....garold

..........

GAROLD????

to be serious for a moment: his story line has actually been really fascinating, whether that has been purposeful or not has yet to be determined, but it’s there!

...i love that the show IMMEDIATELY makes me retract everything I say as soon as I say it by making him an alien WHAT

this is so fucking stupid and not good

and i KNOW you decided this like the day before you started shooting but not a great excuse!

nate and ava IS ftm mtf friend solidarity no i will never elaborate

i have known spooner for 2 seconds and if anything happens to her i will kill all of you and then myself

AN EMMY FOR TALA AN EMMY JUST FOR HOW SHE SAID CHRYSALIS

subsequently: AN EMMY FOR ADAM

the alien boss’s name is kayla???

honestly that is incredible

welp it has been 35 minutes and we have our first bondage of the season. is that a record? it might be

when will phil’s reign of terror end

also yep 22nd century communications technology can just be wrapped in some copper wire and hacked just fine

that tracks sure

honestly how is the flash still on

also gary couldn’t have found you a better weapon other than that clunky ass pipe?

Behrad sounding as suspicious as humanly possible when saying that they are time travelers and this is their time ship

very reassuring behrad well done

wow she’s only been here for like 5 minutes and she already has to drink goo??

and john has not drunk one goo yet????

cruel

omg that ugly ass ring is going to save her. the power of love truly

for real tho it’s ugly as hell ava better ask for a better one

ngl i missed that whole scene after she broke the ice door bc i was texting my girlfriend about the gary as an alien thing

she also thinks it is stupid

because it really is

Anyways at least John and Zari are in love

john loves zari, zari loves her phone, and his dick

astra loves tormenting john

the circle of life

god astra i wish you could detach yourself from these morons, you deserve many fantastic snakeskin clothing items and not whatever nonsense you are going to endure next

the only true throughline for this entire show is gideon only wanting to torment humans, she is the only character i will ever respect

truly just.....did not think a single thing through with gary’s storyline yeah?

we all deserve better than this, but ESPECIALLY adam

Next week: Goo!!!!! And Behrad in a little hat

#legends of tomorrow #legends of tomorrow spoilers #welcome back to the liveblog literally no one asked for #you're welcome everyone #the time idiots #my thoughts as i have them

[cjjingram]

Do u sense that Katie cassidy feels any sense of envy to her DC ladies. Candice Patton plays the female plan A endgame, what she was supposed to be. EBR usurped her in every way and Caity Lotz made it even harder for KC to be BC and now she headlines her own show where she gets rave reviews something KC didn't really get on arrow. On top of all that , her BC has been replaced by an actress who has been getting positive feedback in her less than 10 epis so far. KC is probably shades of green.

If I were her I’d be pissed at the writers for fucking up her character but, then again, I would’ve asked to be written off at the end of season 1.

Look, Colin Donnell has gone on record more than once about the fact that he had a seven year contract (three with Arrow and four with an eye on a spin off) and they had discussed with him the possibility of turning him into Doctor Mid-Nite.  When it became obvious that the chemistry wasn’t there with Amell and KC and the romantic triangle was hurting the show, they went to Colin and asked to break his contract. Amell was the star, KC was the first one hired with a rock solid contract, so he had to go. He could’ve fought it but, instead, he bowed out gracefully even though, according to him, it scared the shit out of him. He said when he got his seven year contract he was so happy because it meant he’d have steady work for seven years then, all of the sudden, he was unemployed and thinking he would never work again. A week later he was on Broadway.

Had I been KC and seen how they were writing my character, seen the bad reviews of my performance, I would’ve told those guys to keep Tommy and kill me off. It would’ve saved her character and opened her up other opportunities. She could’ve come back in flashbacks and still been a major part of the show only as a noble and beloved martyr. 

I honestly think that KC has ruined her career with Laurel. This character and the bad writing hatchet job they did on her will haunt her forever. A great actor once said that they never remember the awards, only the flops. Which stands out more in your mind; Cuba Gooding Jr’s Oscar winning role or all the stupid B movies he’s done since then? Do you remember Russell Crowe more for his acting chops or for the fact that he hit a guy with his phone? 

Like Marc Antony said in Julius Caesar Act 3 Scene 2, “The evil that men do lives after them;The good is oft interrèd with their bones.So let it be with Caesar.”

Black Canary may very well be the smartest move she’s made since accepting that role when you think about it. KC isn’t a great actress and she has very limited range but she plays a good villain.  She likes being the mean girl and every actor will tell you that the villain is always the meatier role. Maybe Black Siren will actually fix her career, who knows?