#still wish i could go to powwows though

[pjthedaft]

heeheehoohoo upon further research i have discovered that there ARE indigenous vendors in my city!! there is a little gift shop not that far from my apartment, and there’s a stall in a market a bus ride or two away. once i move out of this stinky apartment and have some money to spare, i’m spending it all on a new hand drum, moccasins, and some medicines. yayayayayayayayayayayayayay!!!

#still wish i could go to powwows though #i miss dancing #but the nearest one is 40 minutes out of the city #and i have no transportation #sucks bc it’s happening on the rez i grew up on :( #oh well #a win is a win

[mothguillotine]

I.

Everyone in the group was pretty upset with Glenn after he brought the new guy back. While you didn't exactly agree with Andrea shoving a gun in the new guys face, it made sense why she did it. The walkers, who were surprisingly calm for once, were now not so calm and were banging against the glass front of the store that the group was in.

Upon closer inspection of Rick, you realized that he was dressed up as a cop. Sense the begging of the apocalypse you hadn't seen a police officer, not one that was dressed up like one at least. After the loud series of events that led the cop straight to your group, you could only hope that that was the worst part of your day. Evidently, you were proven wrong when Merle started shooting from the rooftop at the dead.

"Oh no. Is that Dixon?" Andrea asks.

On the way up to where the idiot was, you could also hear yelling along with the shooting. You had known before this that Merle was pretty unstable. He was high most of the time and racist towards Morales , his family, Glenn, T-Dog, and Jacqui on multiple occasions. To say the least, you wished he would just die already.

"Man, you wasting bullets we ain't even got!" yelled T-Dog.

Then all hell broke loose. Merle was throwing racist insults towards Morales and T-Dog. Then Merle was on top of T-Dog, beating the ever-loving shit out of him.

"Merle, calm your crazy racist ass down!" you yelled, knowing that he most likely would either ignore the comment or he would target you. But eventually, he stops holding a pistol to T-Dog.

"Yeah! All right! We're gonna have ourselves a little powwow, huh? Talk about who's in charge. I vote for me. Anybody else? Huh? Democracy time, y'all. Show of hands, huh? All in favor? Huh? Come on. Let's see 'em. Oh, come on. All in favor? Yeah. That's good. Now that means I'm the boss, right? Yeah. Anybody else? Hmm? Anybody?" Merle says, trying to gain control of the group. Ultimately, most of the group was forced to raise their hand in favor, which was short-lived. Rick, not much sooner, hits Merle over the head, then handcuffs him to the roof.

"Girly tell Officer Friendly over here to let me go." Merle says, directing the conversation over to you.

"Listen Merle, I know that boss man put me in charge of you, but this whole racial tirade is over. If you can't learn how to work with the group, then you deserve to be handcuffed to a roof. Got it?" you told him, knowing that he would, in fact, not understand.

"You bitch didn' even deserve to be put in charge of me,'' Merle yelled at you. "Not even good enough to fuck."

You walked away. It took all of your will power to, but you did. Rick then went on about finding a way out of this mess that he and Glenn had gotten the group into.

Later while Glenn and Morales look in the sewers for a way out you go over to Rick to find him speaking to Andrea.

"Sorry for the gun in your face." Andera says apologizing to Rick.

"You did kinda deserve it though," you say quickly adding "no offence though."

"If I get us out, would that make up for it?" asks Rick.

"Not completely," you say.

"But it would be a start." adds Andrea after.

Andrea and Rick then talk about Andrea's gun, and how she doesn't know how to use it

"So you have no idea if your wife and son are alive?" you ask.

He then tells you about the picture albums and clothes that were taken from the house.

"You think I shouldn't be so hopeful." he says.

"It's not that," you say "I admire your hopefulness, but you weren't around for the start of this when people would just take anything that they could find."

You liked that he hadn't given up on his family, but you knew that if you weren't with your younger siblings when this started. You wouldn't have held hope for them to still be alive.

"I have to hold on to the hope that they still are," he says "because if they aren't, I wouldn't know what to do."

"The people who I still have are back at camp, my younger siblings." you tell him "I wouldn't know what to do either if they were gone."

When Glenn and Morales come back with the news that you all have been dreading. You feel more anxious to get out of there than before. So there the group was back standing on the rooftop.

“Okay so what’s the plan,” you ask no one in particular.

“You see that construction site, with the trucks?” Rick says pointing over to the abandoned construction site.

“Yeah, kinda hard to miss.” you say.

No sooner than an hour later you were in the street with Rick and Glenn. The smell of human remains was almost too much. While you thought Ricks idea was a little stupid no one else was coming up with any so you were stuck with it.

And when you thought shit couldn’t get any worse, you heard thunder. At this point there was no “turning back” you could only hope that it was a ways off from where the three of you were walking. But that hope was short lived when you felt the rain hit your skin. You could visibly see the guts washing off of you, you knew it was only a matter of time till one smelled you and took a bite.

“The smell's washing off.” Glenn says concerned, “Isn't it? Is it washing off?”

“No, it's not.” Rick says, but then he notices a geek walking towards him “Well, maybe.”

“Oh, shit,” you say after nearly being biten by one, “I knew this plan was stupid!”

“Run!” Rick yells as we all start running to the fence.

You take the metal pipe you brought along with you and start swinging it at the dead that come to close. You kill a few before you are able to make it to the fence.

Once the three of you are there you throw over your weapons and start climbing. Once Glenn finds the keys to the truck all three of you pile into the truck and leave.

“Oh my God. Oh my God. They're all over that place.” Glenn says freaking out.

“You need to draw them away. Those roll-up doors at the front of the store… That area? That's what I need cleared. Raise your friends. Tell them to get down there and be ready.” Rick explains.

“And I'm drawing the geeks away how? I… I missed that part.” asks Glenn.

“Noise.” Rick states.

“Okay and what do I do?” you ask Rick.

“I need you to stay with me to make sure they are all in the truck and safe,” Rick says, “can you do that?”

“Yeah, absolutely.” you tell him.

Soon enough Glenn and Rick find a red sports car. You and Glenn watch Ricks back while he hotwires the car.

“Hey, Sherif. Where did you learn how to hotwire? I thought you were a cop?” you enquire.

“That is a story for another time.” Rick says.

Once Rick is done and the car starts so does the alarm. You honestly forgot how loud things can be. Hiding from the dead meant you needed to be quiet and setting off car alarms was about as far away from quiet as you could get.

“Okay let's get back to camp.” says Glenn.

After Glenn distracts the geeks from the store, you and Rick go to pick up the rest of the group. You help them get in with all the supplies that they had ended up grabbing.

“Where is Merle?” you ask, nobody answers, “T where is he?”

“I dropped the damn key.” he tells you.

“Oh shit.” you say knowing that both Shane and Daryl were not going to be happy with you.

“Where’s Glenn?” Andrea asks after looking around.

“Best not to dwell on it. Merle got left behind.” says Moreles, “Nobody's gonna be sad he didn't come back��� Except maybe Daryl.”

“Daryl?” Rick asks.

“His brother.” Morales tells him.

“He is gonna be so pissed off at me,” you say, “I told him that I would watch Merle and make sure he doesn’t get into trouble.”

“Who?” asks Rick, “His brother?”

“No the person in charge at camp,” you tell him, “he told me he didn’t feel comfortable with us taking him, but I pushed.”

Rick looks at you with a questioning gaze.

“I thought we needed the extra man-power.” you told him, it was a lie. You just wanted Merle away from the camp. Away from Jesse.

You then hear Glenns car speed past you.

“Whoo-Hoo!” Glenn yells.

“At least someone is having a good day.” says Morels.

On the way back to camp all you can think about is how mad Daryl is gonna be with you. Daryl might be the nicer one of the two Dixions, but that doesn’t mean that you two are friends. You would also have to explain to Jesse why Merle wasn’t with you and that conversation was not gonna go over smoothly. And then there's the whole concern of Shane telling you to watch Merle. You were dreading going back.

When you pulled into the camp though seeing your little family was worth it enough. Jesse was holding Gracie in his arms and you could see Adi standing a few feet back. You ran towards them prepared to squeeze the life out of them.

“How was the trip?” asked Jesse.

“Well, to say the least, it was eventful.” you tell him, “How was Adi?”

“She barely talked when you were gone.” he tells you.

When the most surprising thing happened. Carl ran up to Rick and started calling him dad. To you it was obvious that Shane and Lori were sleeping together, so this was gonna be awkward.

Later that night after everything was settled down with Rick rejoining his family you all sat next to the campfire.

Dale: Have you given any thought to Daryl Dixon? He won't be happy to hear his brother was left behind.

T-Dog: I'll tell him. I dropped the key. It's on me.

“No I was responsible for him,” you said, “I should tell him”

“I cuffed him. That makes it mine.” Rick tells the group, but mostly directs it at you and T-Dog.

“Guys, it's not a competition. I don't mean to bring race or sex into this, but it might sound better coming from a white man.” Glenn tells the group.

“I did what I did. Hell if I'm gonna hide from him.” says T-Dog.

“We could lie.” Amy suggests.

“Or tell the truth. Merle was out of control. Something had to be done or he'd have gotten us killed. Your husband did what was necessary. And if Merle got left behind, it is nobody's fault but Merle's.” Andera replied to her sister.

“And that's what we tell Daryl? I don't see a rational discussion to be had from that, do you? Word to the wise… We're gonna have our hands full when he gets back from his hunt.” Dale says to everyone.

“Dale is right Daryl is gonna be majorly pissed off.” you tell the group.

“I was scared and I ran. I'm not ashamed of it.” T-Dog says.

“We were all scared. We all ran. What's your point?” Andrea ratonaizes.

“I stopped long enough to chain that door. Staircase is narrow. Maybe half a dozen geeks can squeeze against it at any one time. It's not enough to break through that… Not that chain, not that padlock. My point… Dixon's alive and he's still up there, handcuffed on that roof. That's on us.” T-Dog says obviously feeling guilty about leaving Merle up there.

Later that night after most of the others went to bed you finally had time to talk with Jesse. You knew Jesse was gonna be upset with you but you had no idea how upset he truly was gonna be.

“I can’t believe that you would just leave him up on a roof.” Jesse snapped.

“You honestly believe that I would just leave him up there?” you ask him.

“Yeah, I do. You are always telling me to stop hanging out with him!” he yells at you.

“You know what Jesse, Merle was a no good drug addict. Not only was he sexist, he was also racist and a neo-Nazi!” you yell back at him, “You are goddamn right I didn’t want you hanging around him!”

“Just because Mom and Dad sent us down here to stay with you doesn’t mean you get to control my life!” he yells at you before storming off.

You couldn’t blame Jesse for wanting an older man to look up to, but you would be damned if that man would be Merle of all people.

The next morning was spent doing chores and after that teaching Adi how to read.

“Okay, we are gonna try again.” you tell her.

“Mm-k” Adi groaned.

“You know what? Why don’t we take a break?” you tell her after noticing her visible frustration.

“Go play with Carl and Sophia, but make sure you stay close to camp. Okay?” you ask her.

“Okay!” she says now excited she gets to skip your daily reading sesion.

“Is she having trouble learning?” asks Carol.

“Yeah but I think-” you start to explain but are interrupted by screaming.

“Mom?!” yells Carl.

“Carl?!” Lori yells back.

Everyone starts running to where the screaming was coming from. When you get there you see the obvious sign of distress. There is a walker eating a deer with two arrows in it. You realize that Adi is standing much too close to the walker for your liking so you pull her back. Then everyone with a weapon starts attacking it. Honestly it's pretty insuficiente because nobody is attacking the head yet. When Dale cuts the head off with an axe the commotion is over and it starts to calm.

“It’s the first one we've had up here,” says Dale, “they never come this far up the mountain.”

“Well, they're running out of food in the city, that's what.” Jim explains.

Then everyone hears noises coming from the woods. Knowing that there is a possibility of the noises coming from another geek you put Adi behind you knowing she will be safe. What comes out of the woods is objectively more scary than a walker, it's Daryl Dixion. The person you have been dreading talking to for the last 2 days.

“Son of a bitch. That's my deer! Look at it. All gnawed on by this… filthy, disease-bearing, motherless poxy bastard!” he exclaims before kicking the body.

You can already tell that this is gonna go down bad. He is already upset enough for the day excluding knowing about Merle.

“Calm down, son. That's not helping.” Dale tells Daryl.

“What do you know about it, old man? Why don't you take that stupid hat and go back to "on golden pond"? I've been tracking this deer for miles.” Daryl explains, “Gonna drag it back to camp, cook us up some venison. What do you think? Do you think we can cut around this chewed up part right here?”

“I would not risk that.” Shane tells Daryl, he is upset about that.

“That's a damn shame. I got some squirrel… about a dozen or so. That'll have to do.” Daryl says, then the head moves.

“Oh god.” Amy says, before throwing up in her mouth.

“Come on, people. What the hell?” Daryl shoots it with one of his arrows, “ It's gotta be the brain. Don't y'all know nothing?”

After that Rick tells Daryl about Merle. He takes it worse than you initially thought.

“Hold on. Let me process this. You're saying you handcuffed my brother to a roof and you left him there?!” Daryl yells at Rick.

“Yeah,” Rick simply says.

Then Daryl pulls a knife out on Rick, but before he is able to do any damage Shane puts him in a choke hold.

“Choke hold’s illegal.” Daryl tells Shane after struggling to get out from under him.

“You can file a complaint.” Shane responds to Daryl, “Come on, man. We’ll keep this up all day.”

“I'd like to have a calm discussion on this topic. Do you think we can manage that? Do you think we can manage that?” Rick asks Daryl who is currently under Shane.

“Hmm?” Shane asks Daryl.

“Mmm. Yeah.” Daryl decides and Shane let’s him go.

“What I did was not on a whim.” Rick explains, “Your brother does not work and play well with others.”

“It's not Rick's fault. I had the key. I dropped it.” T-Dog tells Daryl.

“Yeah, and I was supposed to be in charge of him.” you say owning up to both of yours mistakes.

“You couldn't pick it up?” He asks T-Dog.

“Well, I dropped it in a drain.” Daryl tells T-Dog.

“If it's supposed to make me feel better, it don't.” Daryl argued with T-Dog.

“Well, maybe this will. Look, I chained the door to the roof… So the geeks couldn't get at him… With a padlock. It's gotta count for something.” T-Dog says to Daryl to make himself look less guilty.

“Hell with all y'all! Just tell me where he is so that I can go get him.” Daryl yells at the group.

“He'll show you.” Lori says then looks back at Rick, “Isn't that right?”

“I'm going back.” Rick tells Daryl.

“If you're going so am I.” you tell Rick.

“(Y/N), no.” Jesse tells you.

“Listen, Merle was my responsibility.” you tell Jesse, “Shane didn’t even want Merle going, for this exact reason. He is a loose canon and I push for him.”

“That doesn’t mean you just get to leave Gracie.” Jesse tells you.

“I’m not leaving Gracie. Or Adi.” you tell him, “I fully intend to come back to camp.”

“(Y/N) it’s not safe,” he tells you, “I will go.”

“Absolutely not.” you tell him, “You are going to stay here with Gracie and Adi and keep them safe.”

“This is bullshit!” Jesse yells before storming off.

Later that day you were preparing to leave with Daryl and Rick.

“You know the way. You've been there before… In and out, no problem.” Rick says, trying to convince Glenn to come with us, “You said so yourself. It's not fair of me to ask… I know that, but I'd feel a lot better with you along. I know she would too.”

“That's just great. Now you're gonna risk four people, huh?” Shane asks, obviously upset about the whole ordeal.

“Five.” T-Dog says.

After much arguing with the rest of the group on why you should leave. Rick finally got his ass in the truck and drove off with the other 4 of you. When you finally arrived back to the city the group had a difficult decision to make.

“Merle first or guns?” Rick asks the group, more so towards Glenn.

“Merle! We ain't even having this conversation.” Daryl yells at the group.

“We are. You know the geography. It's your call.” he says to Glenn.

“Merle's closest. The guns would mean doubling back. Merle first.” Glenn tells the group.

So the group heads off towards the department store you were locked inside just yesterday, but when you reach the roof you see something unexpected. A hand. More specifically Merle's hand. Only Merle's hand.

“No!” yells, Daryl, “No! No!”

<Previous Part/Next Part>

Masterlist

#Daryl Dixon x reader #Daryl Dixon #The Walking Dead #fanfiction #reader #y/n

[the-headbop-wraith]

3_45 _ The Past is Gone

  Nothing of Kingsman Mechanic’s appeared out of place. A few lights poured clarity across the work floor, but the other rooms and the storage chamber remained inactive. On the main floor, the white and black hound scurried this and that way, struggling to untangle the erratic path.

 Arthur raised his legs as Mystery padded by. The dog took a sharp left and continued, first checking the flatbed the intruder skipped over, and then roving toward vehicles parked in stations. Mystery came upon a large and swollen duffle bag, laying beside a supply cart. He pawed at the clunky thing, nipping at the zipper on the side.

 Lewis prodded at the sack, shifting it one way then the other cautiously. It was hard and chunky, likely some sort of equipment. The question though, did he bring this in or was he taking it?

 A bark form Mystery assured that there was nothing hazardous. Lewis tugged the zipper and tilted his skull.

 “You should’ve barbequed the guy,” Vivi grumbled. She moved in beside Lewis and peered over his shoulder. “Skinned and then barbequed.”

 “A bit excessive.” Lewis angled his skull up and peered across the room, to Arthur. “Turned him inside out, and then barbequed.”

 “Now you’re talking.” She leaned down and touched his hand. “It’ll be okay. Uncle cares a lot about you, but he needs some time to adjust.”

 Lewis rasped. “He needs time to adjust.” He didn’t bother to zip up the bag, and stood. “First thing he does is put a hole right through me. Who does that?”

 “A protective parent?” Vivi posed. She leaned around Lewis’ side, staring up at him. “Arthur’ll be fine, he’s sore but it’s all aches. He told me nothing in his shoulder was torn or cracked, which is a marvel.” She pushed him by the lower back, coaxing the tall spirit on his way.

 Two hours following the intruder’s retreat, Uncle Lance was on his second pot of coffee. In that time, Vivi did her best to reconstruct the events of what transpired all that time in the past, wherein an ‘accident’ occurred. There remained crevices that she could not put description into, due to Lance’s inexperience to the actuals of the Mystery Skulls paranormal investigation. And also, that Lewis’ did not merely loose his footing on some slippery rocks. It wasn’t a good time to bring in the influencing force, or place the ideal that it’s compulsion was strong, if not impossible to fight away. Despite the skewed memory, Vivi was the only candidate to elaborate the details. Lewis was adamant about that.

 For the most part, Lance seemed to take it all in as well as anticipated. He did need some time alone to think, and really grapple with what he was seeing. Beyond the revelation that Lewis wasn’t gone – not entirely there, either – the shock that supernatural creatures existed out there, entities that occurred not far from his home base.

 As for the intruder in the mask, the trail led outside and down the road. Mystery lost it on the sidewalk, prompting Vivi’s speculation that he got into a vehicle and departed. She returned to Kingsman and checked on Arthur, while Lewis accompanied Mystery in the next search. The motivation and intent of the assault. The bag offered some insight.

 “Good news, we figured out what the guy was here for,” Vivi proclaimed, in a strong dramatic whisper.

 “And there. I didn’t drop you off someplace. High.” Lewis set the bag down at Arthur’s feet. A look of ‘what the fu—' crossed Vivi’s face when she directed her eyes to Lewis. “You… don’t seem as appreciative as you should be.”

 “Lew!”

 Arthur fixed the soggy bag of water against his neck. “Sorry. Not surprised, is all. This is the furthest anyone’s got with getting away. At least, that I know of.”

 Vivi was aghast. “This has happened before?”

 “Not like this.” He flecked his hand upward. “If someone breaks in, they jack shit that’s easy to access. Grab’n go. We store special components upstairs, things that get legs real easy. Whatever’s pricey and small, easy to miss, gets locked up. Only one other guys has the keys, aside from Uncle and me.” He sighed. “Not that this would do anyone any good.” With his hand, he rifled through the duffle. Some folders were crammed in, among the shell and arm shapes.

 Lewis shifted and looked away, his thumb stroked the underside of his cheek bone. “Then, could it have been someone working here? One of the grease monkeys?”

 Mystery yapped and gave his head a shake, ears flopping.

 “Not… likely,” Arthur drawled out. “These models are shells, nothing useful has been incorporated into them. It’s possible the guy grabbed and jammed, if he was in a hurry. But you didn’t run into him upstairs, not in that tiny corridor. So, he was already on his way out.”

 The four hung quiet a moment, debating on the assessment. Lewis broke the silence, “So, what does that mean?”

 Arthur shrugged. “I’ll go upstairs and check, make sure nothing else is missing. You lost the trail?”

 Mystery borked and spun in circles. Got in a car and zoomed.

 “And what sort of car?”

 Mystery tapped his front paws, raising one and flattening his ears down. “Mhh….”

 Lewis and Vivi exchanged a look. Vivi said, “Hangs around a car garage?”

 “Can’t distinguish between the different models?” Lewis finished.

 Mystery snorted and left them, ears twisted back and muzzled crinkled. All this oil smells the same.

 Lewis gestured to Vivi. “There’s not a lot to work with.”

 “No.” She turned to Arthur. “Let’s get you upstairs so you can lie down.” Vivi leaned down and took Arthur’s upper arm. Lewis took the bag up and moved aside, while Vivi hefted Arthur off the box. “We can ask Uncle Lance about the cameras later.”

 “I’m fine,” Arthur insisted, though he let Vivi aid him in getting upright. Lewis stood by, hand open as if he wanted to assist but wouldn’t move towards Arthur. “Think I was mostly stunned. Good thing these boxes were empty. Anyway, the cameras wouldn’t be much help. Aside from proving the guy was a jerk.”

 “Always the optimist,” Lewis crackled. “I doubt they’ll come back around.”

 “You sound real proud of yourself,” Vivi quipped, through a grin.

 “I really wish you’d seen them. It was like they saw a ghost.” Lewis’ skull swiveled on his collar, and he wound his shoulders around to face the stout figure approaching them.

 Lance gave his face a firm rub, before searching the group over. “Don’t mean tu break up teh powwow. Your gunna be okay, Art?”

 Arthur grimaced and pulled on the edge of his vest. “I’ve been worse.”

 A steely expression crossed Lance’s face, but he didn’t respond on that. “Yuh. Sure. Um, I want to head on over to my place, sleep this off. Might take the rest of the day off.” He pointed to Arthur. “And you’re not comin’ in either.”

 “I already had the day off….”

 “The whole week, then.”

 “Uncle,” he groaned, stretching awkwardly around Vivi to facepalm.

 “No. M’words final. You. Ghost Pepper.”

 Lewis eye sockets surged with those fuchsia flames. “It’s Lewis, Uncle Lance. Lew-Is.”

 Lance swept his arm. “C’mere. I want a word with you.”

 A low rattle burned through Lewis. “Juro si este va a ser un tema recurrente….”

 Lance led the way through the work floor, and into the dim corridor entrance. The shorter man stood with his arms crossed, glaring at Lewis and trying to look as imposing as he could muster without standing on his toes. Lewis met the stance, crossing his arms tightly over his chest.

 “Vivi talked with you.”

 “She talked with me,” Lance acknowledged, with a nod. “N’it was a good conversation. A lot tu take in. There’s a lot tu… tangle mah thoughts ‘round.” He glanced a little beyond Lewis’ shoulder. “I try not tu pry into your kids… Arthur and Viv-vi’s going on’s. I trusted… ‘em, despite whut happened to m’boy. Tu yu.”

 Lewis creaked back and looked away.

 Lance went on, “I thought stayin’ busy an’ doin’ their thing was right. But now, I dunno if that was what bein’ best for ‘em. She told me what ya’ll been preoccupied with, but there bein’ more she ain’t willing tu give over. All this time, I thought yu were out on the road, unmasking kooky loonies playin’ pretend. Fakes doin’ shenanigans for publicity, tryin’ to shirk a profit.”

 For a minute the two stood, quiet and contemplative on the crossroads. It was not total silence, a steady thrum persisted from Lewis. Like a heartbeat, Lance was not eager to address.

 “And what’s this about Arthur comin’ home, with his arm all beat tu heck?” Lance snarled. “First, he loses it. Now it’s cursed, and he can’t – he can’t furbish a replacement to make use. Keep it functional for more than… a couple months! Yu’re adults, and ya’ll got yur business tu work through, but do yu lot got yur priorities squared?”

 Lewis frowned. “You’d have to take that up with the boss lady.”

 Lance pressed his hands to his face and took a deep breath. “Yu and I are talkin’ it now.” He pried his hands from his face and held his palms together, against his nose.

 For the first time, Lewis realized Lance’s hands were quaking. It was subtle, maybe he didn’t realize it. The stillness hung between them, while Lance struggled to get his bearings.

 “Somethin’ happened between you an’ Art, I’ve seen enough tu conclude that.” Lance sighed. “Yu won’t e-Lab-or-ate on it, an’ that’s all right. It’s your business. But yu should know I am downright upset I wasn’t told about this.”

 Lewis tilted his skull. “About… what?”

 “About what?” he exploded. “About… everything! All of this! I deserved tu know something, any small scrap that wasn’t a lie! A bit of the truth, that’s all I ask. I can’t be there for Arthur,if he’s hidin’ away!” Lance threw his arms up gesturing nothing in particular, his breath came labored and his brow beaded with droplets. “About yu! I should’ve in the least, been told yu’d… resurfaced, or sumthin’! Whatever y’all call it. Do your parents kn—?”

 “NO!” For the first time Lewis’ features snapped from gnawing fury, to wide eyed horror. “No-no! They can’t! And you can’t tell them!”

 Perplexed and alarmed, Lance eased back. “Okay. I got it.” The light of the corridor fluttered, the embers in Lewis’ skull flashed.

 “They can’t know about me, about what I—  About what happened. Please, Uncle Lance,” Lewis rasped, the remnants of his speech drew on a rustling surge. The spirit clasped his hands together. “There’s only one thing I will ever-ever ask of you, and it’s that you never speak about what you saw here with anyone, save for Vii and Artie. Please! Don’t do that! I’m begging!”

 There was something else that Lewis wasn’t saying, he could scarcely make it out in those gleaming eyes. But the utter desperation and remorse reverberating in that ‘voice’, he couldn’t bear to ask and witness the rush of agony. Lance didn’t understand, but the topic pained Lewis in some undefined way. Or, it could’ve been a trick of the light.

Lance took another step back, hitting the wall behind him. “I hear ya, they won’t… Yu have mah word.” The skull retained its defensive countenance, and he struggled to overlay what a living Lewis might’ve looked like right now.

 “They uh… they’re likely waiting on yu. Art and Vii,,” Lance took a work rag from his belt and swept it across his face.. “Lewis, listen. I want to— You’ve always been a good kid.” How did he say this? “I worry abou’ ‘em, and I’m worrin’ more now thinking about… all this. You can’t, I mean – I know I can’t— I don’t want what happen….” There wasn’t a good way to deliver the request, so he gave up in a long-winded sigh.

 “I’m headed off now.” Lance moved down the corridor, but only got three steps before he about-faced and marched back. “I did’t park out front.” He inched by Lewis and made it another five steps, then swung back. “It was good seein’ yu again. Yu gunna be around an’—” Before he finished, a flash of flames engulfed the figure and in the curling ash remained nothing but a faint outline. In short time, as Lance’s eyes readjusted, the murky impression faded.

 “I’ll take that as a no….”

  __

  In the time that Lance took Lewis aside for a short exchange, Arthur had relocated upstairs to his work room where he currently perused through his personal gear and spare parts. When Vivi made certain Arthur would take it easy and not stress, she left to pick up some food for the evening. Given everything that went down, neither was inspired to head back to her apartment and try getting back on track. Work, even casual work stuff, could wait.

 “None of the work gear got mucked with,” Arthur mentioned offhand, when Lewis materialized in a plume of heat in the doorway. He lay reclined on the sofa, his head resting on Mystery’s back while his legs sat propped by the arm rest. “Dunno how long the guy was working, since closing. Arms are easy to build, for the most part. But that paranormal stuff is kinda pricey.”

 He leaned his head up to see Lewis better, when the spirit glided over behind the couch. The skull and death suit, any number of reasons why. Could’ve forgotten in all the chaos, or didn’t care. “How you holdin’ up?”

 “Fantastic,” Lewis wheezed. “I have one fear now.”

 That didn’t sound good. Arthur pondered if he should tease the subject further, but given the vibrant tension smoldering around Lewis he decided any other day might work better. He adjusted the new ice bag on his forehead and shut his eyes.

 “Why didn’t you just, y’know, disappear? You’re good at that.” He opened his eyes and winced. Lewis was leaning on the couch, glaring down at him.

 “Wasn’t really keen on leaving you in the care of your Uncle, regardless of good intentions.” Lewis lifted one arm from the couch and touched the locket thudding on his chest. “Did not expect him to go full Ash Williams with handling threats. Where’s Vivi?”

 Mystery woofed.

 “You should get some rest while you can,” Lewis offered. “It’d be safe now.”

 Something in Lewis’ tone made Arthur leery. “You gunna keep an eye on me?”

 “I won’t go anywhere without telling you.”

 Mystery twisted his body around enough to nuzzle Arthur’s hair.

 “I have a sneaky suspicion I should keep an eye on you.” The glare subsided, but Lewis still seemed peeved. Arthur edged a little away from the spirit, pulling his body more over onto the coffee table. “You’re not planning on going anywhere. Are you?”

 “Absolutely not.”

 “Damn it Lewis, I can’t tell if you think you’re being subtle or an ass. Knock it off.” Lewis expression shifted no miniscule way, aside from the faint waver of his burning eyes. Was it possible they looked much hotter than usual? “I’ll update security, put some better locks on the doors – not that it ever stopped thugs from breaking in before.” That’s why Lance had the shotgun. “We can’t go any further. We shouldn’t. And I’m ‘bout done with this.”

 “How ‘bout I find this guy anyway?” Lewis stood away from the couch. “A little more inspiration, to assure they won’t even dream of setting foot here, ever again.”

 Arthur got off the couch and went over to the boxes of gear, digging through the packing. “What is this fixation you have with revenge? What you’ll wind up doing is, draw too much attention to us. In our hometown no less. Get a grip!”

 “My frien—” Lewis let his tone sputter out not too gracefully, and backtracked on the sentence. “You get creamed, I got shot up – I think I’m entitled to invoke a lil retribution.”

 Arthur pulled out some equipment and set it carefully aside. Damn, it was tedious doing anything one handed. “You scared him off. That was enough!”

 Mystery was glancing back and forth between the two. Where the hell was Vivi?

 “It’s not enough,” Lewis hissed. “We’re in a fine fix on account of that-that… delincuente. And I will make certain he never comes back! What are you looking for?”

 Arthur dumped one of the energy readers. “Where the heck is Vivi?”

 Lewis crossed his arms. “She’d tots be on board with this scheme, and you know it.” Arthur deflated over the box.

 “Shit, you’re right.” Lewis leaned over him.

 “Tell me what you’re looking for, Arthur.”

 Arthur cowered under the shadow. “I’ll tell you one thing, it has nothing to do with you.” Lewis’ eyes burned brighter.

 “You’re lying to me, aren’t you?”

 Arthur snapped his fingers. “Shoot! Damn. Can’t get one by you, can I?”

 Mystery rolled his eyes and face palmed. He bled, for this?

 It was not long later that Vivi was standing in the doorway with groceries, beholding as Lewis and Arthur went at each other. She had NO IDEA what was going on, it was the midpoint of some consecutive theme, bouncing around the argument that Arthur was being too passive. For Arthur’s credit, he looked like he was trying to haul Lewis up by the lapels of his death suit. It was quite the sight to walk in on. The scarce traces of embers bristled around the room, and Mystery was trying to keep them from alighting on anything flammable. Anything flammable seemed to be everything.

 “—you let that thing into my home. Practically invited it!” Lewis screeched.

 “What home?” Arthur snarled. “The mansion?”

 “I don’t recall owning costal real estate!”

 Vivi took a breath and raised her voice. “Hey, you guys gunna be okay?”

 Lewis and Arthur simultaneous spat, “NO!”

 She turned to Galahad, bundled in her scarf. “At least they agree on something.”

 “You don’t own anything!” Arthur rebuked. “You just haunt some place and—” Lewis pointed down at Arthur.

 “Don’t you dare go there, Kingsman.”

 In a mad dash, Vivi left Galahad to Mystery and shoved herself between the two, breaking Arthur’s grip on Lewis. “Enough! The both of you can just take two big boy steps away.” Lewis reversed a step due to her full body shoving, but he held his glower on Arthur. “All right, listen! We all had an arguably fucked up evening, but we are not doing this tonight! Both of you! That’ll be enough!” She gave Lewis a harder shove, to dislodge him fully.

 “You never had a temper like this!” Arthur snapped back, while Mystery tugged him away by the back of his vest. “The littlest things piss you off. How am I supposed to work around you when you got all these… these barriers, everywhere!” He stamped his foot.

 “I’ve been somewhat overheated since my ultimately demise,” Lewis grated, “but I have been trying very-very hard to be very-very-VERRRY patient. All the same, you make that so difficult.”

 At least he wasn’t resisting her asserted relocation. “And we are so proud of you,” Vivi snapped. “You’ve been working so hard, hasn’t he Arthur?” She glanced back

 Arthur blinked. “Are YOU kidding me!”

 “Oh my lor—  Hasn’t! He! ARR! THUR!”

 Arthur slapped his face. “FINE! The bare minimal, what’s the bare minimal? You didn’t roast Uncle, like you almost roasted me and Vii! I’m so ecstatic! Ya get a Gold Star!”

 Lewis shifted against her palms, but seemed to calm down and eased out of leaning. The embers still lingering around the room snuffed out, leaving only the kindling scent. “Yeaah,” Lewis hummed.

 There was no way to oppose that. He wouldn’t admit Arthur was right, but he did have a point. It was a lot to deal with, and not a lot of time allocated to process. Though, it wasn’t just getting shot a dozen times and dealing with Uncle Lance all in the same hour; then, the expectation of carrying on, like nothing happened – all of it scorched him. He was a little more than irritated, and he was… afraid. Afraid, when he didn’t reach Arthur in time, and frustrated he didn’t have the foresight to restrain the intruder; more than that, fretful and unsatisfied by what was left. None of this he could convey practically, yet he… he couldn’t hide it either. There was a lot he couldn’t really conceal, ignore, or repress. He could do better, but it was... hard. They didn’t know how hard this was.

 The other three went quiet, as well. Arthur hadn’t dropped his hyper-lazer scowl, as if expecting some form of reckless objection – though Lewis was fresh out of those. One of Vivi’s arms remained braced across his chest, though her full-bodied leaning had regressed by multitudes. In the beats preluding his lockets dull thrum, the tension began to ebb.

 At last, Lewis broke the silence, “That… would’ve been excessive, yes? He meant well, after all.” The fluorescent light flickered, like the flutter of a heartbeat. “Though not gonna lie,” he hissed, “I was on the fence about socking him.”

 Vivi smacked her head against his chest and gave a muffled scream. You could have not said anything!

 “It was getting a strong debate. I mean, he shot me like four times.”

 “It was fifteen— Wait, I missed that.” Mystery released Arthur’s shirt, and he nearly toppled forward. “Okay. I’m…. I wanna understand, Lew. You and me, and Vivi, we have to talk about this. I don’t want you to do this.”

 Vivi brought her gaze up to Lewis. “What? Wait… what is he talking about?” It dawned on her the next second, who could possibly be deserving of a nasty visit. “Artie,” she groaned, “C’mon….”

 “Not helping,” he growled.

 “Fine,” Lewis grated, ember eyes flashing. “Have it your way.”

 Arthur glared, unconvinced. “Lew.”

 “Give me the benefit of the doubt,” Lewis beseeched. Without jeopardizing his gaze, he brought a hand up and touched the locket. “I didn’t really believe further involvement on my part was necessary. I’m just… I need some time to think. To… get a grip.”

 “Like literally,” Arthur huffed. He cleared his throat and tottered back, when Vivi delivered a scathing glare of her own. “Fine! Done. I’ll sleep better knowing I didn’t have a hand in someone else’s ultimately demise.” He gave Lewis a sharp look, before spinning away.

 Lewis stood to the side, gazing off as if he didn’t know what to do now or where to relocate. Vivi pointed a finger, directly into his bleached skull face – warning. His glower did deepen, as she left him to collect the bags left at the threshold.

 “Vivi,” his voice was distorted, echoey. “I’m heading back down to look around. When you get the chance, would you come meet me?”

 A note of shock crossed Arthur’s features, but upon the direct request the alarm faded. Vivi handed over the bags.

 “Sure,” she replied. She plucked Galahad up and set him on the couch, beside Arthur. To Arthur, she whispered, “I’ll keep an eye on him.”

 “You both are making me so nervous.”

 “I won’t be gone long.” She kissed Arthur on the forehead, and set another bag of drinks beside him. “Try and relax, please?”

 Arthur took a breath and sighed. “I’ll give you three, before I start losin’ my mind.” He snared Galahad, before he could begin chewing at the supplies.

 Before leaving, she charged Mystery with looking after Arthur. She wasn’t confident Arthur was fully out of the woods yet, despite Lewis’ assurance.

 The workspace of the garage seemed infinitely more barren and silent, once all the excitement had aired out completely. Uncle Lance would’ve under normal circumstance shut down the lights through the entire building, save for the upper floor. As she crossed the floor, she was almost afraid the place was utterly abandoned. Not that this would matter to her, but Arthur’s distress was cause for concern. The argument between he and Lewis was nearly lost on her, but given the day it didn’t take much to deduce her living friends hesitation.

 When she rounded the sportscar, Vivi uttered a squeak of relief. “I thought maybe you’d already taken off.”

 Lewis actually maintained his solidity and rotated his skull, then his shoulders, but only a margin. “No. I was thinking.” He was examining the space beside the toolcart, where they located the bag of Arthur’s crafts. A number of orbs bobbed around Lewis, while he contemplated.

 “Personally, I would prefer you go after this guy,” she admitted. She stepped up alongside Lewis, and gave the area a brief but mortal search. “But what would that solve?” Vivi wasn’t certain if he was aware the living guise was not restored yet, or if his focus was out of whack.

 “Not a lot, I suppose,” he uttered, voice rustling. “I might head over to your apartment, and rest there for a bit.”

 She meant to say, ‘You don’t have to, unless you want’. But what came out was, “I don’t think you should.”

 “I’ll be well enough. So will Art,” Lewis replied. His skull adjusted, lifting a little higher than anticipated above his crisp white collar. “He and I… well, you saw.” There was something else indistinct to that tone, but it was choppy and a trial to translate. “I’ve never seen him so mad before. Not even on a botched assignment.”

 Arthur had many fears, both grand or miniscule threats to his personal being. There were methods to supersede the private terrors which confronted him.

 “You gunna be all right?” she posed, while reaching out to his hand. But stopped herself.

 “The concern is appreciated, though I don’t think… well, I wouldn’t be in any peril.” Lewis turned fully to Vivi and set his hands on either of her shoulders, he leaned down and set the upper edge of his jaw against her bangs. An endearing skeleton kiss.

 Vivi couldn’t help but giggle. “We’ll come by and check on you in the morning.” As Lewis backed away, his shape and color drained out beneath the blazing illumination of the lamps above.

 “By then, we should have cooled down.” With a surge of embers, Lewis vanished entirely. His words continued to ring out, however, “No dejes Arthur to worry. He can do with taking better care of himself, for a change.”

 Uncertain if Lewis was still present or not, Vivi went ahead and left the area. She called, “I’ll remind him, like usual. It’s a task easier said than done.” The atmosphere was completely palpable, when Lewis abandoned the area completely. Likely due to the anticipation, the sensation of being observed from afar evaporated. She had her suspicions, but she wanted to take Lewis’ word on the matter.

 The lights too emptied out of the open airspace of the work floor, when she snapped the switches off. Her course from the entry corridor and to the ascending steps was very lonely, her perception becoming constrained with each set of lamps clicked off. A penetrating silence moved through her, while an overbearing draft kneaded her muscles. Her hand traced the wall with her ascent, each step calculated, cautious should Galahad have made his way down the steps on the behest of his most favorite person.

 When she reached the private workroom, she found Arthur already fast asleep. That was good, she reckoned. Both for his bruised body, and the emotional expulsion. Arthur was entirely out cold, his good arm curled beneath his cheek and the muscles in his face relaxed – she could scarcely make out his breathing, until she closed in further. Nestled against his neck, a small ball of puff and metal.

 Across Arthur’s folded legs lay Mystery, his bright eyes observed Vivi as she approached. On the ground beside the couch, rested a few crumpled wrappers of junk food and an open can of coffee drink; the caffeine no match to physical or mental exhaustion.

 “Tomorrow might not be better than today,” Vivi hummed. She took a rumpled blanket from the couches back and lay it around her friends. “But it’ll deliver us further away. The only constant is that days are relentless, whether we want them or not. Take us on a journey, and though we never can return to once ways.”

 She climbed onto the couch, close beside Mystery so she could lean over and scratch his neck. “There’s a place awaiting us, ready to receive the person we became. Indifferent to the changes, next year only wants to see us arrive. Scars aside, hurt and disappointment, blessings all the same. When we arrive, there will be no resentment. Celebrate who we are, and mourn the loss of who we once were. There is no turning back, and no regret, if our steps are steadfast. Survival is an artform, and I’m a masterful composer. The colors I use on my canvas will never dull. No matter how far we travel down the road, at my core I am complete.

 Mystery arched his head up and licked at her hand.

 “If I wasn’t, my world would crumble. Without you, the bridges fail. And the peril will never end, without you. Without you, there’s no place like home. No where to go. Without you I’d lose my way, caught up in the shadows of long-lost days.”

 In the stillness of the small workroom, Vivi drifted off into a deep slumber. Perhaps assisted, perhaps not. One aspect was for certain, as it became a certainty that Vivi was well and asleep, the light of the room doused completely. The door creaked on its hinges, as an imposing silhouette eased back trailing a rose tinged vapor of light.

#mystery skulls #ghost #mystery skulls animated #msa #fanfic #fanfiction #mystery skulls fanfic #mystery skulls fanfiction #msa lewis #msa vivi #msa arthur #msa mystery #msa lance #ghost pepper

[solari-writes-things]

Breathe

requested by: @supervalcsi

THIS IS SO CUTE BUT SO SAD IM HERE FOR IT. This also has potential for a multi part thing. Not sure. It’s a hard maybe.

Prompt:

#43: How long have you been standing there?

#46: Why aren’t you afraid of me?

Happy Lowman x Reader

WARNINGS: language, violence, alluded harassment

gif isn’t mine, credited below!

SoA Tag List: @chibsytelford​ |  @thebookishfeminist​ | @crimsonheart01​ |  @tsumethedrifter​ |  @sazafraz​ |  @kind-wolf​​ (if you wish to be included, please message me or comment below)

Revolt rippled away through your body, a hand clasped over your chest as you tried to even out your heartbeat.

You were forced into a situation that you had to eject yourself from. It wasn’t by your own doing, and that just made your lungs feel like they were doing flips in your chest.

Just breathe, you’ll be fine... you had been telling yourself that since you had retreated to the bathroom in the establishment. You were at a small bar with Happy, whom had asked you to accompany him for a drink in privacy since he had decided to take an interest in you about a month ago. He didn’t mind paying for drinks out of pocket, if it meant getting to know you a little better. The idea seemed thrilling, all things considered. He was mysterious, an interesting character that you had noticed stalking around the clubhouse.

You had thought about every situation about how this could go. Everything in your head had played out fine, with the exception of this.

You didn’t anticipate breathing scum to be traversing the bar. Someone who was watching you closely until your company had stood up for just a moment to take a call in the quiet. When they approached, you stated that you were accounted for and went about your business. But when they kept pushing, you became more and more adamant until you stood up and charged off.

You were hunched over one of the bathroom sinks, moving your eyes up so you stared at yourself evenly in the mirror. You focused on your heart rate, listening to it slow in your ears. You inhale slowly, exhaling for a few seconds before sucking it up and fixing your disheveled hair.

You dust yourself off, checking to make sure there was no scuffs in your outfit. Even with what had occurred, you wanted to be presentable for the SAMCRO member. He was taking time out of his day for you, and you were here for him. Even if you both had to relocate, or find something new to do, it wasn’t going to get done while you were hiding in the restroom.

So taking one more confident breath in, you hum to yourself in affirmation before turning on your heels and pushing the bathroom door open with a little more gusto than you had anticipated. Your eyes surfed the crowd, trying to pinpoint both Happy and the scum who tried to chat you up. 

Only to see that both of them were gone.

So you excuse yourself through a crowd, side stepping around the folk who were forming small powwows to chat away with one another. You make your way to the bar, where Hap and you had taken your seats for the night and signal over the bartender.

He shuffles over to you once he tops off a couple draft beers, eyeing you evenly to make your request.

Instead, you hit him with a question. “Did you see where the guy I was sitting with?”

“He paid his tab and left without saying anything,” the bartender replied, picking up an empty glass and wiping it down with a rag.

You nod your head, averting your eyes as you thought about what could have warranted him retreating. “Alright. Thanks.”

The bartender gives a brief nod before moving to attend to someone who had signaled him near the end of the bar.

You let out a defeated sigh, adjusting your bag on your shoulder before pushing your way toward the door. You didn’t think that Happy would be the kind of person to remove himself while you were away. Not unless the club had requested his presence.

Your head begins to file through the possibilities of what could have happened, and when your hand rested on the door is when the chips began to fall in place for you. Your mind circled back around to when you left the bathroom to rejoin Hap, noting once again that the harasser had been missing from the bar in the mere few minutes you were gone.

Shit.

You hurry out of the door, looking around for any sign of what could have happened. The neighborhood that the two of you were in was remote. Aside from the crowd lingering outside of the bar, it was desolate. No cars rolling down the street, nobody adventuring past a few feet from the front door. You scan the street, remembering Happy had parked his bike rather close to your car.

There it stood, camouflaged in the surrounding darkness. The only thing that stood out about it was the white anarchy symbol on the front.

He hadn’t left the area.

So you adjust your bag once more and search for any signs. You begin to walk further down the sidewalk, focusing on the noise around you to see when the bar music would begin to drop off. Once the muffled noise faded from earshot, you shot your head up to look for anything Happy could remotely hide behind so he wasn’t in view. Alleys, dumpsters, anything that he could obstruct the view of his face.

You move just a few feet down before you hear whimpering, the tone familiar to the one that cursed your ears just fifteen minutes before. You hear his whining muffle, and a few sharp blows to a body.

That had to have been Happy. Nothing else made sense.

You quickly and quietly jog up to the opening of an alley, turning to your right. However, what you saw caused you to pause at the entrance and watch.

Happy had beaten the man till he was nothing but blood and tears, their face swollen and their arms constricting around their body to shrivel away from the biker. Happy was standing up straight, staring down at the pathetic display in front of him.

You only reacted, though, when Happy reached into the back of his jeans and brandished the gun that you knew he kept on his person.

“Hap, wait!” you immediately bark, causing him to reel his head toward you suddenly. He didn’t hear you approaching, and the sudden sound of your voice had startled him.

“How long have you been standing there?” is all that he asked, barrel of his gun still aimed down at the man he had followed out of the bar.

“Long enough,” is your response. “Hap, if you fire that thing, everyone within a three mile radius will hear. I just want to get back to spending time together, okay? Please put down the gun, you made your point.”

“No, I haven’t,” he replied, his face serious.

“Happy, yes you have. Look at him,” you gesture to the man, who had essentially lay in the fetal position with his back against the wall. His eyes were wide, staring down the barrel of the pistol that had been held up at him.

Happy’s gaze moved back to the man, his lip curling up in disgust at the sight. However, he disarmed the pistol and tucked it in the back of his jeans once again. He didn’t let the man off easily, though, his now leather clad hands gripping at the front of his shirt and roughly lifting him upright. He slammed their back against the wall, which caused a yelp that was almost loud enough to be heard.

“Come sniffing around again, I’ll finish what I fucking started,” Happy sneered and shoved the guy toward the entrance of the alleyway.

You moved out of the way as he stumbled back into the open, watching as he limped off in the opposite direction of the bar. You exhale softly, your eyes moving back to study Happy.

Only now were you able to see small details that were different. He had stray flecks of red on his SAMCRO shirt, but his black hoodie was seemingly untouched in the darkness. You observed him closely as he peeled off of his gloves and shoved them into his back pocket.

You were aiming to be the first one to break the silence, but Happy seemed to beat you to the punch.

“Why aren’t you afraid of me?” he questioned, interlocking the two ends of his dark hoodie. He pulled the zipper up, straightening his posture the higher it raised. Once it was zipped, his eyes met with yours and he tucked his hands into his pockets.

He was right. Even seeing the bloodthirsty animosity in his eyes, you weren’t afraid. In fact, you were more allured to him than before. Most people would cower at the raw emotion you saw. However, you more focused on the aspect of him listening to you to lower the gun. Strangely endeared that he would go out of his way to make sure scum like that wouldn’t offend again.

“Why would I be afraid of someone who was trying to defend me?” you ask simply, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Because I was about to kill him if you didn’t stop me,” he stated.

The matter-of-fact tone in his voice sent a small chill down your spine, but not one that would prompt you to run. The fact that he knew what he was capable of, and elected to ignore his base instincts to cater to yours was something to behold.

“I, honestly, thought you would have. Even if I said something,” you admitted.

“Who’s to say I won’t?” Happy chides. “I’m just not here for him. I came to be with you, so I’m gonna stick to my guns.”

You let out an exasperated chuckle, shaking your head at the remark you assumed had been something along the lines of sarcasm. Until the tone of his voice clicked in your head.

“Wait, how’re you going to do that?” you ask him.

Happy reaches into his jeans, gripping something in his pockets. He brandishes a wad of cash, but then turned it to reveal a California Driver’s License had been hidden inside.

You sigh heavily, pinching the bridge of your nose. “Okay, I don’t need to know anymore. Can we just figure out where else to go?”

Happy shoves the wad back in his pocket before nodding his head. “Yeah. You choose this time.”

#happy lowman #soa #sons #sons of anarchy #sons of anarchy imagine #samcro #solari writes things

[writingamongtheroses-archive]

I finally finished the story inspired by this post, although this is probably going to burst into a whole new WIP idea.

When Ket feels Ada’s presence back in the world, he immediately hunts down where it’s coming from. The human witch had been a bitch in life, the demon certainly didn’t want to see what she could do as a free soul.

He tracks her down and starts laughing when he sees her.

Unintentionally or not, Ada has bound herself to a porcelain doll. A child’s toy. The cherry on top is that children had actually found her. The Chatwood siblings are easy prey. The eldest two, Lilac and Lynx, are teenage twins with opposing natures and argue too easily. The youngest, Fawn, is nothing more than a little girl.

Ket laughs and forgets that little children are perceptive.

He makes his entrance. Bleeds the world into a monochrome shadow while the kids are walking down the path. It’s good to exercise his power without Ada trying to punch him in the eye. He enters the scene with loud cackling and fire and stars, the whole shebang. Conning kids starts with a good show, after all. He isn’t disappointed by the reactions.

Lilac and Lynx are sharing frightened, confused looks, not sure how to react to this, but the prey animal parts of their brains are screaming to run. But both are shielding their little sister- not like it’s working. Fawn is glaring at him, angling Ada so she can glare as well. He introduces himself grandly, preparing-

“Ada sa...says not to trust him.”

And the show is crashing on the words of a stuttering little girl. Lilac turns to the littlest one here, Lynx keeping his eyes on him. Good strategy.

"Is he bad?"

"Y...y...yes." It takes her a few tries to get the word out. And while most people would assume the stutter is from fear, Ket can see the anger in her gaze. Ada has probably already filled her in. She takes a deep breath in, holds it for a minute, then lets it out. "He's a drama king-"

"Hey!"

She ignores him. "And a liar. And a demon." She speaks each word calmly and clearly, in an attempt to avoid stuttering. "Don't... don't make a deal with him. It's bad."

"Okay, so how do we get out?"

Fawn cranes her head, listening to Ada. Ket can't hear her, but it's clear that she can. She points in a random direction when she's done with her little powwow. "We...we-e're in a bubble."

"Okay, cool." Lynx turns with Fawn and Ada still glaring at him. He scoops up his little sister and they start walking.

"Wha- Hey, wait!" Ket starts following. "What about a deal?!" Even as he says it, he knows they'll refuse.

For now.

He waits them out and takes this opportunity to learn weaknesses.

Lynx and Lilac are easy. Thanks to the influence of teachers who thought they knew best and parents in a struggling marriage, they have been turned into the stereotypical twin set. Lynx is the popular sports player who slacks off. Lilac is the brainy loner who works a bit too hard. They argue because they have been divided and the other, in their eyes, outshines them, although they have been arguing less.

As for Fawn…

She's seven.

She's doing normal seven-year-old stuff. Like coloring and playing dress-up and baking. She's the one who talks to their grandmother Velma the most. She and Velma have tea parties together and watch TV, taking turns between soap operas and cartoons.

The three of them do spend time together. They like to go adventure in the woods, usually with a picnic.

Ada is always there though.

Weeks of watching pass before the first one breaks. Much to nobody's surprise, it's Lynx. He accidentally ruins Lilac's book and they dissolve into an argument. It’s a ‘meathead’ comment that sets him off and sends him running. He wants to be like Lilac- to have a future and not peak in high school like he believes he is. Ket only has to dangle those wishes to get Lynx to agree.

But Ket has forgotten an important fact.

Little children are perceptive. They haven’t had the years’ worth of forced ignorance like older kids and adults. 

So when Fawn sees her brother grinning at her, forcefully polite in his request to see Ada, she realizes everything wrong. She stammers out an excuse, edging out of the room, before running for Lilac. Ket realizes too late. Fawn hides in the attic and Lilac leads him in a cat and mouse game, only to hit him over the head with a frying pan.

In pain, Ket calls off the deal and leaves the body so Lynx can take it back.

He’s left to wait for his next opportunity, watching even more.

Lilac helps Lynx finds a balance between sports and studying, even though it’s summer. Fawn encouraged her and him to talk it out- oh.

Oh.

Isn’t this interesting?

Ket shelves the information away and waits for his next opportunity. And, because it’s honestly funny, he pops in every now and then. Keep them on their feet.

It’s Lilac, next. She finds out that her GPA is a point too low to allow her into her dream school. She stresses herself out, furiously trying to find some solution. She avoids sleep and burns herself low and late into the night. She makes the deal with an exhausted sigh.

It’s funny how neither of them expected him to abuse the loopholes.

He possesses Lilac. Learning from last time, he locks Fawn in her room before she can start screaming. Drunk off of the victory, he grabs Ada and hurries downstairs to build a fire in the fireplace, Lilac desperately pleading all the way. Lynx interrupts and puts two and two together when he sees the fire in the middle of the day and Ada without Fawn.

He grabs Ada and leads Ket in a chase around the house. Lilac’s body is exhausted and all too easy to crash. He calls off the deal again. Annoyed and tired, he watches as Lynx comforts Lilac and the two comfort the sobbing Fawn, scared out of her mind the entire possession.

Ada is scared too.

He can sense it.

It takes even longer to wait. This time, he makes sure to not show up to relax them. It's a rainy week when he finally gets his chance. Both of the twins are on edge for some reason or another and it makes them snap at each other. Fawn is tired of them fighting.

He shows up once before, catches her off guard and without Ada. He makes a show out of his power. Fawn refuses, of course. He was expecting it, of course. Little children are made of sterner stuff. But they’re still human.

The next day, Lynx and Lilac have the mother of all arguments. Fawn bursts into tears when they say that they hate each other and runs upstairs. Ada tries to comfort her but she throws the doll on her bed before hiding upstairs. Ket finds her.

“G-Go...go away.”

“I can make them stop, kid.”

It takes only a bit more pushing for Fawn to agree. He’s not sure why she’s so surprised when he possesses her. Learning from experience, he locks her deep within her own mind. Ada howls at him when he comes in.

He scurries out the front door and hurries to the town lake, far from the cabin where Velma lives. It’s sunset when he gets there. Lilac and Lynx are not as wise, it’ll take them a while to figure it out. And it’ll be too late. Ada screams desperately for Fawn, Fawn screams desperately for Ada.

That doesn’t stop him from summoning a flame.

Ada is left a wreck of burnt china and smoldering fabric, the ghost forcefully pushed to the other side. Fawn sobs from inside her mind. “Well, that’s done,” Ket says cheerfully. “Pleasure doing business with you, kid.” Loud yells alert him to the calvary finally arriving. “Well, looks like time’s up!”

He leaves.

He doesn’t call the deal off.

Lynx and Lilac find Fawn unconscious on the beach. She wakes up and sobs out apologues. The older two try to calm her. They also try their best to ignore the wreck of a doll a few feet away.

The Chatwood siblings bury Ada on the beach. They stay out for the rest of their summer. They go home.

Ket can’t help but watch. His deal with Fawn allows him a front-row seat into her mind. She has nightmares and never forgets about him. How sweet!

It also allows him, years later, to find out that she’s back.

“Hello, Fawn,” he says, early twenties Fawn scrabbling desperately at the hand around her throat. “I’ve missed you.”

#story #life #wip #writblr

[elopez7228]

Scenic Route 6/47

Read on AO3 : https://archiveofourown.org/works/18268208/chapters/43229774 

Start over : https://elopez7228.tumblr.com/post/620919089893933056/scenic-route-0147

“Why name her BB8?”

“She was the eighth of a litter—we tried to call her anything else but that’s all she would respond to, so BB8 stuck,”

Rey was happy to give the dog a few scratches. The big ball of affection didn’t hesitate to throw an old tennis ball at her feet, along with a sock, a rubber duck, and even a fork she had pilfered from the kitchen in place of a stick.

The duck squeaked as she grabbed it, and Rey burst into a laugh of pure joy. How could she have been so mistrustful of an old woman who owned such an adorable dog?

“Why did your brother leave you his dog?”

“She was injured by a hit-and-run and I rushed her to the vet, but he eventually had to leave her to get back to his professional obligations at the time. It hurt him to leave her behind but we both knew she was in good hands. Since then I’ve been looking for an opportunity to take her back, but I’m in no shape to make the journey myself anymore.”

Rey said nothing as she watched the charming dog go round and round on the carpet as she waited for Rey to play with her some more. Leia put down her steaming teacup.

“So, Rose sent you, right? Are you close friends?”

“Not at all, actually. I just happened to be at her café at the right time. We talked a bit, I mentioned my travels and my personal life, and she said you have a job to give me,” Rey chuckled, going a little red.

“I was worried it was a con—drugs, guns, something illegal. But everything’s alright, I love BB8. I’d love to take her on the route with me, she’ll be good company. Always a good idea to have a dog when travelling solo. “

“Well, I’m not sure she’ll be an effective guard dog, you know,” Leia smiled.

“Oh, no worries, her presence is enough, at worst she’ll be more bark than bite! How urgently would I have to take her to San Francisco?”

“She’s already six months late, a few more weeks wouldn’t matter…are you comfortable with the detour?”

Rey tucked a lock of hair behind her ear as she adjusted her topknot, ruminating on her response.

“I wanted to go up to Yellowstone National Park, and then Montana. Take a trek, do some rafting or some horse riding, something like that. I also wanted to check out some ghost towns, see a rodeo, maybe a powwow? Then make my way down to Idaho and Nevada. Take my time, you know. Would that be a problem for BB8?”

“Not as long as she makes it back to Luke—my brother—in one piece,” Leia waved a hand dismissively, “I’m sure it’s going to be a lovely trip. I wish I was your age so I could go globetrotting too,”

Rey laughed, glancing from one photo to another. “Weren’t you in the army? I’m sure you traveled a lot…on that note, Rose mentioned a car?”

Leia got up and motioned for Rey to follow her. “Yes, it too belonged to my brother. You’ll need to take it to California too, and it’s not doing quite as well as our friend BB8. I’m afraid it’s not exactly the most recent make and model,”

Rey followed Leia outside the house. They were taking a walk, it seemed. BB8 trotted along happily, occasionally snapping at the insects circling in the plants. It sat in a five by five plot of land in the middle of the garden on the other side of the house. Rey had mistaken it for a supplementary garbage disposal unit. An oldsmobile cruiser—exactly like the ones that at one point had been the very height of the 70s. It screamed vintage, from the boxy silhouette to the oversized bonnet which was as long as the boot itself.  The car had been white at some point, though the paint had certainly faded. It was complete with brown accents and a classic wood motif on the side, which made Rey cringe. She turned to Leia with a disapproving look.

“You have got to be joking here.  I thought your brother left you this hunk of junk to dispose of at some junkyard, not to give right back to him,”

“Well then,” Leia huffed, “all the more reason to do it, right? You know me, if he wanted to make a trash compactor out of me I really want to see his face when this baby shows up in his driveway again.”

Rey wasn’t sure if Leia was about to make a huge mistake. “This thing surely isn’t functioning anymore, is it? You’d make more money selling it to a junkyard than letting it collect dust in your garden.” Rey looked around again, “You could plant a lovely vegetable garden or whatnot instead, I’m sure you have a green thumb,”

“It was my husband’s,” Leia said wistfully, and Rey realized that she wasn’t kidding. “It was his pride and joy, he would fix it up himself back in the day. He loved that thing so much. And the life we had, all the crazy things we would do in that car…I didn’t have the heart to scrap it, it would be like killing him all over again.”

“He died? I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you—“

“It’s fine,” Leia said, running her hand across the side panel in a gentle caress. “You had no way of knowing. He and my brother went the whole nine yards in this thing. It’ll get back to him somehow,”

“Alright, fine,” Rey conceded, “I understand, I’ll take the hunk of junk and the dog to San Francisco, no worries.  Do you have the papers as well?”

“Yes, they’re inside, let’s head back,”

After reviewing the vehicle registration and the owner’s manual (all of which were still up to date, not that she would have bet so) and following multiple assurances and other formalities, Rey found herself feeling something new inside. This would give her the solo road trip she always wanted, and an adorable dog to keep her company, in literally the most vintage American car she could have ever imagined.  She had always been a good driver and a car person, so she looked forward to driving a proper stick shift. It had been a good while since she last drove one and it only added to the excitement of the trip. Against all odds and expectations, Rey was actually quite a clever and resourceful  mechanic, thank you very much. She knew how to change the tires and the oil, and how to identify the source of most engine trouble. Simple things, really, but things that she would almost certainly have to do with this car. As for the rest of it, she would definitely have to invest in a good pair of sunglasses and a very wide-brimmed hat because the interior wasn’t air-conditioned at all. And water. Lots and lots of water. Maybe even a jerry or two of motor oil and petrol. And an emergency kit in case she really did get a flat tire. She was finally beginning to get goosebumps about this. Nevertheless, one detail remained to be settled.

“Pardon me if I’m being too frank Leia, but Rose mentioned some compensation, is that right?”

Leia was currently reassembling a dossier full of documents that Rey had decided not to take. She put it down gently. “Yes, I’ll be providing you with 500 dollars up front for your services. That should also cover the gaz change. Luke will give you the rest once he’s sure that BB8 is safe and sound.”

One thousand dollars wouldn’t cover all Rey’s costs, what with meals and motels and extra gaz. But she could make do, considering that a few days ago she was looking at spending twice as much just to loan a car. It would work out. It didn’t have to be a job per se, it could be…community service, absolutely.

Rey nodded, and Leia closed the dossier with a soft click.

“I’ll leave tomorrow then,” Rey said, deep in thought, “It’ll give me a whole day to make some purchases for the rest of the trip. Would you mind if I took the car? It could be a test drive as well…”

The afternoon was filled with what could only be called intense shopping. Her list consisted of mechanic’s tools, camping gear, sunblock, ration packs, a first-aid kit, dog biscuits, and even a cheap mountable stereo. She then purchased several CDs for the long road ahead, including a three disc deluxe album of the one and only KYLO & THE KNIGHTS OF REN, which she would no doubt regret impulse-buying later.

The car was at best dusty and stale, despite the little tree-shaped air freshener hanging from the front mirror. Too little too late to undo a decade’s worth of rotting in Leia Skywalker’s garden.  Rey took it upon herself to take it to a carwash and have it cleaned from the inside out. There was no telling what they would find. Earlier she had found a toy in between the back seats—a shiny red racecar that she’d shoved into the GB.

Getting ready took up most of her afternoon. She packed the car up with all her supplies and even made a little “doggie corner” for BB8 in the back seat. It was complete with a crochet blanket in case she got cold, a food bowl, her squeaky rubber duck, a tennis ball, and a single shoe. Everything was ready by the time that Leia called them back inside for dinner.

It was as though Rey was at her own grandmother’s house, despite the fact that she had only really known the woman for a couple of hours. She came back into the cottage to find a steaming bowl of spaghetti waiting for her. After a long day’s work, it was truly heaven.

“So, do you know Rose well, then?” Rey managed to ask after she had finished stuffing her face and regaining her strength.

Leia took a while to respond, prompting Rey to wonder what was so hard about the question. Finally, Leia raised her eyes after a long moment of reflection. “She and I both operate in a charity organization based out of Denver. That’s how I know her.”

“Oh! What kind of charity? meals for the poor or something?”

“Not exactly…”

Rey waited politely for an explanation but Leia seemed reluctant to answer. She pressed on, “Well? Come on now, surely you could elaborate a little?”

“It’s called Earth Soldiers,” Leia responded suddenly. She wasn’t smiling anymore, much to Rey’s surprise. “You could call us a group of…hardcore environmental rights activists.”

“So like GreenPeace? Protesting power plants-and chaining  yourself to property sort of activists?”

“Sure, you can think of it like that if you want,”

Rey was all full belly and drooping eyelids by then; she failed to notice the tension building in the room.

“But isn’t that dangerous at your age? Can you still attend the happenings or whatever they are?” Rey continued.

Leia’s gaze hardened imperceptibly. “I’ve spent my whole life fighting and I want to go down swinging,” she replied.

“Ah, I see. I imagined that after a life as full as yours you would have liked to take a break, but everyone is different, I guess,”

In response Leia simply began picking up her own empty plate so that she could start attending to the dishes. Rey tried her best to help by drying the dishes afterward and putting them away. Later, after spending a few minutes on her phone, Rey yawned loudly and excused herself for the night.

“Sorry, I should probably get to bed. May I set up the camping tent in the garden?”

“Just set up in the living room, that way you won’t get cold or have to take down a tent tomorrow. And you won’t have to hear the drunk ravings of the neighbors next door,”

“Alright, BB8 and I will leave after breakfast in the morning, goodnight Leia,”

“Good night, young lady.”

Rey rested her head on her new inflatable camping pillow, curled up snugly in her brand new sleeping bag. The carpeted floor would do for now. She was going to have to get used to sleeping on the floor soon. BB8 curled up into a ball too, sleeping on the couch after realizing that her dinner bowl was nowhere to be found (it was still in the car). Rey fell into a deep sleep. This was the first night she had not been anxious about the future, barring of course the night she was too drunk to remember—that didn’t count.

Late into the night, a coyote wandered the sleeping trailer park, an unfortunate shrew in its jaws.

Much further away, in the heart of Denver, Ben Solo performed another concert at Howl at the Moon, and Rose left the night shift at the Night Owl Café to her sister, Paige.

Their next door neighbor George Watto had started his nightly ramblings no later than three in the morning, eventually falling asleep at his own front door, fully dressed and armed with a beer bottle like a true American hero. In the quiet little cottage next door, Rey slept soundly in the living room while Leia found no sleep in the bedroom next to it.

Tomorrow, she would send that girl off to Luke in San Francisco. It was too late to go back. After years of careful political maneuvering, her entire life’s work hinged on the whims of a random British tourist who decided to vacation here of all places. What if they discovered her little honey pot scheme? What if they laid a hand on…

It was somewhere in the middle of this tiring web of entirely disquieting thoughts that Leia Skywalker fell into a short and fitful slumber.

#Reylo #fanfiction #Modern AU #Scenic route

[master-sass-blast]

Strong as Stone --Part Twenty-Seven

*crawls out of the week* Oof. I’m tired.

Welcome back to the madhouse! This is your resident goblin speaking, here to update you on some news for Strong as Stone!

First: After taking some time and consideration, I’ve decided that this is the last update where we’ll be seeing Trump. I know that he’s wearing on some of you, and he’s wearing on me too, so this is his last hurrah. After this chapter, there’ll be a mention of his impeachment (necessary for some upcoming plot stuff) and then that’ll be it. (Warning: He goes out with a bang. This is Trump, after all.)

Second: After this update, we’re going to take some time for the some serious F L U F F. After a wonderful little plot powwow with @ginghampearlsnsweettea (idk why Tumblr won’t let me tag you :P), I realized that I was going ham on the political blech and the angst. So, yeah. Fluff break coming up. PREPARE YOURSELVES!!!

Third: I actually need your guys’s help for this bit. I do have kids planned for Okoye and M’Baku in the future, but I don’t know how many to give them. I come from a small family, and I tend to lean on what I know, but I’m curious to know what you guys think is a good number. Tell me what you think in my asks, dms, or my inbox on AO3.

Okay, onto the main stuff:

Last time, we saw hints of HYRDA’s involvement in stealing vibranium from Wakanda. Fortunately for our favorite General, the intrepid Agent Everett Ross is on the case. Unfortunately for him, it looks like his brother --General Thaddeus Ross--is involved somehow.

This time, I experimented with a new style of writing. Instead of having Okoye do all the narrating/having the narrator narrate from her perspective, we’re getting glimpses at what O’Chenga, Ayo, Aneka, and M’Baku have been dealing with during a dinner/hang out with the couples (M’Baku and Okoye and Ayo, Aneka, and O’Chenga).

Rating: M for political blech, Trump being Trump, and strong/misogynistic language.

Pairings: M’Baku x Okoye and Ayo x Aneka x OC.

@the-last-hair-bender, @skysynclair19

As constant as your struggles may seem, make sure you take time to support your friends and hear their frustrations as well.

Many of us often travel the same current in the river and share many of the same struggles. We ought to take care to not forget it.

“This has been a long time overdue.”

“Agreed.” Okoye smiled as she flipped over a few steaks on a large skillet. “I can’t wait to hear everything we’ve missed with the festival work and the missions.”

O’Chenga and M’Baku exchanged a long, exasperated look before M’Baku went back to dicing up several large potatoes and O’Chenga went back to prepping legumes, vegetables, and greens for the main vegetarian dish. “I wish there was something light hearted to report,” O’Chenga started as he chopped up a large eggplant. “Unfortunately...”

<<<

“Nephew. I would speak with you.”

O’Chenga grimaced as he watched Elder F’Tendi sweep into the throne room of the Great Lodge as though he was the Chief and his nephew, M’Baku, were his subordinate. Hanuman, what fuels this man? It can’t be common sense, since he clearly forwent that long ago. “I would advise you to address your Chief with due courtesy, Elder F’Tendi. This is not your throne room you step foot in.”

F’Tendi stopped to eye him coldly, then bowed slowly, mockingly. “My Chief. May I council with you?”

“And what if I say no?” M’Baku asked, cocking his head to the side.

“It would be in your interests to not. I am here to speak with you about Dewani.”

“Escort him out,” M’Baku said without hesitation.

O’Chenga smirked as he watched the guards move in to usher F’Tendi away from his friend. Serves you right.

“I hope you know what kind of company she keeps. There are rumors that she’s been caught associating with the Wild Ones.”

M’Baku lurched forward, snarling through tightly clenched teeth. “I will hear no more of your baseless accusations!”

O’Chenga leaped forward, catching his friend’s shoulder with one hand and motioning to the guards with the other. “Escort him out. Now!”

>>>

Okoye frowned. “Wait. Wild Ones? I don’t think I’ve heard of them before.”

“They are a... dark cult in the Jabari tribe. They worship the demon Ravana, one of Hanuman’s enemies,” M’Baku said with a scowl.

And F’Tendi is trying accuse Dewani of associating them to discredit her before the trial for his abuse starts, Okoye surmised. Wonderful. “Well, at least there can’t be any validity to the claim. Honestly, why would he even try to swing that far?” She froze when M’Baku didn’t immediately affirm her assertions. Bast, no. “Is there validity to his claims?”

M’Baku sucked a breath through his teeth. “It’s... complicated.”

<<<

M’Baku pinched the bridge of his nose. Hanuman, give me patience. “Dewani, you realize how this looks, right?”

His baby sister rolled her eyes. “Yes, I’m not an idiot, M’Baku! I know this looks bad.”

As soon as his uncle had left the lodge, he’d immediately taken O’Chenga and tracked down his sister. There might not be laws against homosexuality, but there were laws against associating with the cult of Ravana. M’Baku’s uncle had incredible sway with the traditionalists of the tribe, who were already wary of Dewani because of her liberal views and relationship with Princess Shuri. The last thing his sister needed was a legitimate chink in her armor.

But this? This was arguably worse.

“So, you admit to having ventured into the cult’s territory, and you refuse to tell us why?” O’Chenga repeated, confusion evident in his tone and expression.

“I was visiting a friend,” Dewani said, waving her hand dismissively.

M’Baku groaned and rubbed his temples. Hanuman, give me the strength to not whack my sister upside the back of her thick head. “Dewani, I need you to take this seriously. F’Tendi could legitimately have you banished from the tribe on these grounds alone, and there would be nothing I could do to stop him!”

“Trust me, I am taking this seriously!”

“No, you’re not!”

“Yes, I am!”

M’Baku forced himself to take a deep breath. When you agreed to raise her, that meant raising her through everything, including moments like this. Be patient. Seek to understand, not to be understood. “Okay, then I’m not seeing it. Help me understand how you’re taking this seriously.”

Dewani shrugged as she flounced away, evidently done with the conversation. “When the time comes, you’ll see it.”

M’Baku gave into petty temptation and smacked the palm of his hand against his forehead. Hanuman dammit.

>>>

Okoye grimaced as she put the steaks on a plate to rest and covered them with foil to keep them warm. That’s about as disastrous as it gets. “She wouldn’t even give you an answer?”

“No! She refused to reveal anything.”

“Which is highly unlike Dewani,” O’Chenga added as he stirred a mixture of eggplant, legumes, sweet potatoes, leafy greens, and goat’s cheese in a skillet.

Okoye nodded, well aware of the teenager’s reputation for boldness and zeal. “No kidding. Were you able to get any hint as to what she was doing in the cult territory?”

“No.” M’Baku’s mouth twisted into a troubled frown. “I can’t fathom that she was actually worshiping demons; Dewani is a devoted follower of Hanuman, and I think she’d sooner die than tarnish Olufemi’s legacy as a priestess. Unfortunately, I doubt it will matter in the eyes of the traditionalists.”

“She’ll be guilty by association,” Okoye concluded. She sucked a breath through her teeth and placed a comforting kiss on her lover’s shoulder. “Do you want me to try and talk to her?”

“You’re welcome to try, but I doubt you’ll get anything out of her.”

O’Chenga shook his head as he added some minced garlic and sea salt to the vegetable mixture. “You definitely won’t.” He grinned jovially after a moment and nodded his head in M’Baku’s direction. “She’s his sister, after all. Their skulls are the same thickness.”

M’Baku shook his head as everyone else laughed. “My friend, the comedian.”

O’Chenga bowed halfway as he transferred the vegetable mixture into a bowl. “I’m here all night. How’s the lawsuit going?”

Okoye rolled her eyes as Ayo and Aneka groaned. “Well, I wasn’t in the United States when this happened, but I think the incident speaks for the situation quite nicely.”

<<<

“Ayo! Ayo! Get your ass out here!”

Ayo smirked as her girlfriend called for her from the bedroom. She’s so cute when she’s impatient. “Calm your tits.”

“I will not! It’s the President! He’s commenting on Okoye’s lawsuit!”

Ayo practically sprinted out of the bathroom, still wrapped in the towel she’d used to dry off after her shower. “Wait, what?”

Aneka was sitting on the edge of the bed, remote in hand and dressed in her pajamas and a scowl. She was glaring at the image of the man in charge of running the United States on their flat screen TV. “They gave a preview before the commercial break. You’re not going to believe this.”

“Frankly, I think it’s unfathomably unjust of the Wakandans to promote this kind of hatred towards the leader of another country,” Trump said in a recording from a press conference. “I fail to understand how they could’ve blown such a minor misunderstanding so far out of proportion.”

Ayo’s jaw dropped. Minor misunderstanding? I was there! He hit my best friend on the ass! What’s there to misunderstand?

“This kind of behavior is going to be the end of the world. Before you know it, we won’t be able to brush shoulders with women without them crying ‘rape!’ The Wakandans are complicit in the disenfranchisement of men everywhere, and I won’t stand for it!”

“Is this scripted?” Aneka asked, brow furrowing. “He’s using multi-syllabic words, and I can’t fathom that he actually knows any on his own.”

It doesn’t matter, Ayo thought as she watched the pitiful excuse for a man gesture stupidly with his hands. This is a nightmare.

“This lawsuit is nothing but a scam being pushed by a government held down by women, and I’m not going to let them take America down with them!”

Ayo sank down onto the mattress next to her girlfriend. This can’t be real. Someone’s going to stop him.

“I won’t be paying any ‘damages!’ America won’t be paying any damages!”

Aneka gripped onto Ayo’s hand.

Ayo clenched her girlfriend’s hand back just as tightly.

“Instead, Wakanda is going to be paying damages to us! The damages for with-holding vibranium, and the damages for trying to start an anti-male campaign to further their own agendas against the free world! You have my word as the President, I’m not going to let anyone fuck with America!”

Ayo realized Aneka was shaking and put her arm around her girlfriend’s shoulders. “It’s okay.”

“We’re a great country--”

“He’s an idiot; don’t let him get to you.”

--and we’ll always be a great country!”

Ayo grimaced at the sight of a single tear tracing it’s way down Aneka’s cheek. She brushed it away with a kiss, then took the remote out of Aneka’s limp hands and turned the TV off. “That’s enough of that.”

>>>

Okoye grimaced as she took in M’Baku’s and O’Chenga’s shocked expressions. “Before you ask, yes, he really said all of that. I had a meeting with my attorney the very next day to discuss what we’d be doing next.”

“What can you do next, in the face of that?” O’Chenga said in a shell-shocked voice.

“Not much,” Okoye muttered. “You just sort of have to wait for the idiot to hang himself.”

M’Baku’s hand found hers under the table and gave it a comforting squeeze. “Is there anything good that’s come out of the past few weeks?”

“Well--” Aneka paused as she took a sip of water “--there is, actually. It’s kind of a roundabout story, though.”

<<<

“Why do Americans make their coffee so sweet?”

“Well, actually, it’s likely due to the processing most of their foods go through and the melting pot effect of so many merged cultures. Each immigration group had their own way of preparing food and drinks, and when you stack that all together you’re bound to end up with some bastardized versions of bastardized versions of recipes. Plus, sugar and fatty foods were less expensive in America, so most immigrant families would try to replicate the way the wealthy ate back home.” Aneka felt a rush of warmth run from the top of her head to the tips of her toes at the soft smile Ayo favored her with. “What? It’s true.”

Ayo simply shook her head and continued sipping at her coffee. “You’re cute when you’re nerdy.”

Aneka opened her mouth to reply, but was distracted by a flash of gray-blond hair outside the window. “He’s here.” She watched as Agent Ross walked into the shop and up to the counter, then frowned when he kept ordering for nearly a solid minute. “What all is he getting? This is supposed to be a quick meet up.”

Ayo shushed her gently. “You’ll see.”

Agent Ross walked up to their table and sat down with a grimace. “You’ll have to forgive me for being hasty about this, but my brother’s expecting me to meet him in less than twenty minutes.” He set another thumb drive on the table. “I followed up on the leads that Jhanvi sent me. I was able to find the shipment of vibranium you’ve been looking for. Some HYDRA agents captured it after S.H.I.E.L.D. fell.”

“Good,” Aneka said. “Where is it?”

“That’s the sticky part. The shipment’s in my brother’s name. I can’t touch it without him finding out.”

Oh. Not good. Aneka picked up the thumb drive. “So, this is...”

Everett smiled grimly. “I was able to stick a tracking device on the container. Tell Princess Shuri it contains the link up to the device. She’ll know what to do with it.”

“Thank you, Agent Ross,” Ayo said. “We’ll be sure to follow up on the shipment, keep you clear of this.”

“I appreciate it.” He glanced at his watch, then stood with an apologetic wince. “I’m sorry for rushing out, but I really need to go.”

Aneka watched as he walked out, picking up a heavy paper bag of food as he went. “Was he getting food for him and his brother?”

“Doubtful.”

“It’s the only explanation that makes sense.”

The corner of Ayo’s mouth turned up and she nodded out the window. “Watch.”

Aneka watched as Agent Ross crossed the street, then stopped to hand off the bag to a homeless mother and her children. She smiled.

The news about the shipment was less than ideal. It’d be near impossible to slip the vibranium out of General Ross’s hands without him realizing that it was them.

But, with allies as kind and aware of the world around them as Agent Ross, she felt like they had a good shot.

Ayo tapped on the table with her now empty cup. “Come on. We need to get the drive to the Princess.”

>>>

“He sounds like an honorable man,” O’Chenga said as he sat back in his seat.

Okoye nodded in agreement. “He is. He fought the Border tribe with us, helped take down the ships trying to carry weapons out of the country.”

Ayo drained half her beer. “I don’t know about the rest of you, but I need a vacation. All the missions and bad news has seriously worn me out.”

“I think we’ll get a break soon,” Aneka said brightly. “I can feel something coming. Something good.”

“Well, if you’re trying to give me ideas for tonight--”

Okoye chuckled as she watched Aneka swat at Ayo, but she couldn’t help but feel her best friend’s weariness in equal measure.

The past year had been exhausting. It seemed like they kept moving from one disaster to another without a good break from it all.

Okoye let her head rest on M’Baku’s shoulders as she listened to her friends argue back and forth. Bast, please let an end to all the drama come soon.

#sass writes #black panther fanfiction #okoye x m'baku #ayo x aneka x oc #polyamorous relationship #trying some new writing styles for this update #don't think i'll use it too much but it was fun #i can't wait to write some GOOD fluff #the story needs some #wakanda forever

[tricksandtales]

Chapter 12: A Family Affair

Chapter 12: A Family Affair

This is my family. I found it, all on my own. It's little, and broken, but still good. Yeah, still good. -  Lilo & Stitch

----------------------------

 Sam had spent his night cooped up in the library, just as Dean had said. Cas had not reappeared as he was now on the hunt for a potential earth-bound angel, so Riley and Dean had played video games and drank beer for the rest of the night, then headed to their separate beds.

 Riley had slept fairly well until the early hours of the morning when she’d woken, chilled. It had been unseasonably warm until this point. But apparently fall had decided it was finally here, and the bunker was having a hard time catching up. She had dragged what flimsy covers there were on her bed over her, cocooned herself up and tried to sleep for a few more hours.

 When she finally dragged herself out of bed and entered the kitchen in her pjs, pink pants and black tank top with the words ‘angel’ done in rhinestones (Riley thought this pair oddly fitting), she found Sam and Dean, both fully dressed. It was surprisingly early for them to be so put together, but maybe they were cold too. She shivered again, ‘so cold.’

 They’d both muttered good mornings, though Sam’s was much more upbeat. “You found something?” She asked, figuring it had to be the reason he was happy.

 Sam gave her his half jerky smile, “Yes and no. I think there’s a way to communicate with Michael.”

“That’s a last resort.” Dean frowned down at his cereal, voice still gruff from sleep. So they hadn’t been awake long, but got ready quickly. A hunt maybe?

 “But we I found something better. According to the lore, there’s a tracking spell we can try. Much like Dean’s amulet.”

 “Amulet?” Riley asked, voice muffled by the fridge as she rooted around for the milk.

 “Something I’ve had forever, it was a gift from Sammy.” Dean answered, hand touching something through his shirt.

 “I thought it was protective charm.” Sam offered. “But we found out later it was super powerful charm that was supposed to burn hot in God's presence. We still have no idea why it could do that. But it eventually did, once Chuck allowed himself to be found.”

 Dean mumbled something around a bite of his food. It was probably something unpleasant, based on Sam’s glare.

 “So, you can use this amulet to find the prophet?” Riley asked.

 “Not that one.” Sam answered, “But I think something like it can be made. With some assistance. We need ingredients, and then we need a powerful witch.”

 Dean snorted, “Luckily, or unluckily, we know one of those.”  

 Sam went on to inform Riley that they had called a powwow for that afternoon to discuss what they needed, and how to get those things. In the meantime, they were calling in reinforcements. So the morning was meant to research and get ready, while they waited for their friends arrival.  

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 It was still cold by the time Riley had gotten ready and headed to the main room. Still a few hours left before Sam said the others were scheduled to arrive. It had given her a nice excuse for a long hot shower. At least the water heater in the bunker was large and strong, so she didn’t have to worry about running out. This was especially important considering the amount of time she’d realized it took Sam to get ready in the morning. That boy spent so much time washing his hair. And Riley was envious of the sheer number of products he had.

 Riley ran a hand through her own hair. Unless she was meeting clients or going to court, she spent very little time doing anything with it. Mostly it just air dried into soft waves. It gave her an effortless look. Which was in right now, or so she reasoned. Mostly she didn’t want to take the time to worry about. Preferring to focus more on other things.

 Based on the temperature, Riley had dressed in layers. Dark jeans, a blue flannel shirt with a crimson colored hoody over it, zipped most of the way up. She’d also donned fuzzy socks, with allowed her to pad silently down the halls. Thus the boys didn’t notice her at first when Riley wandered out, laptop under her arm. “Is it just me or is it freezing in here?” Their heads jerked up at her voice, slightly startled.

 Sam and Jack were at the table. Both looking at her for a moment before Sam gathered his wits to respond. “It is an old building, sometimes takes time to warm up.”

 It took her a moment for Riley to realize Sam and Jack weren’t the only ones present, and her gaze landed on Gabriel, who was sitting in a chair against the wall, legs thrown over the side. Their gazes met for a moment and Riley blushed. She hadn’t seen him since her apartment. Her fingers absently rubbed the mark on her wrist. His eyes dropped to her wrist and he gave her lopsided smile.

 “How are you all not wearing anything heavier?” She asked, turning her attention to the others. Gabriel was the only one in a jacket, but he normally wore it, so it probably had nothing to do with the temperature. She glanced again at the angel, wishing she could steal his jacket. She could still remember the feeling of waking up and finding it wrapped around her.

 “I don’t get cold.” Jack said pleasantly. Sam just shrugged.

 “Mm. Well, I’m hoping it warms up soon.” She shivered. “Otherwise I’m gonna need to get a winter coat. And it’s only the beginning of October.” She sat down at the table across of Sam. “Where are Dean and Cas?”

 “Beer run.” Jack supplied.

 “It’s early, even for Dean.”

 Sam smiled, “He’s prepping for Charlie.” At Riley’s odd look his smile grew into a grin, “He and our Charlie used to be really close. He’s hoping alt world Charlie will be enough like ours that they can be friends. Beer is supposed to butter her up.”

 “I liked Charlie.” Jack piped up. “She was a good fighter.”

 “In the other world.” Sam murmured, answering Riley’s unspoken question. Changing gears Sam motion to the books in front of him, “We’ve made good progress with the spell and I think I’ve gotten the ingredient list. With Jack back, we’ve got the whole hunter network working on this. Ketch and Charlie are heading this way to help us. Cas and Gabriel are going to get Jody and her crew. Plus mom’s coming back. Rowena’s on standby for when we get everything together.”

 “Dean thought we would need more beer, and pie.” Jack added. “He likes pie. I like apple pie. I have not tried other flavors.”

 “We can fix that, Jack.” Riley murmured, “Slowly.”

 “Everyone should be here within the next four hours.” Sam said, a half laugh at Jack’s enthusiasm over pie. Which seemed to almost match Dean’s.

 “Ah. So what’s our game plan?”

 “Hang out, read up on the leads on ingredients. Map out travel routes.”

 “Where do you want me?” Riley asked. Gabriel made a sound of amusement from his perch. Riley sighed, knowing that he was thinking something dirty.

 Sam glared at him assuming the same, “You don’t have to be here yet.” Gabriel only shrugged in response. “Riley, if you want to look for articles and things on this.” He slid her a piece of paper with a couple things on it.

 She raised a brow, “These are ingredients….” She trailed off her question.

 “Yeah.” Sam said, offhandedly, no longer paying her any attention as he was engrossed in his own laptop again. Sam had a habit of falling into the lore and forgetting about the world around him. Jack just smiled and turned back to his computer, though from the look of it, the kid was playing some sort of game and not researching.

 “Okay.” She opened her laptop. She pulled up several news sites and google. Because google was a girl’s best friend. Her list was weird. Apparently, water from where a rainbow falls was a thing. And the water of the four rivers – both waters needed to be blessed by a holy man. Riley glanced over at the much longer list in front of Sam: a human baby's first laugh, fire which has been cried by the Earth, wax which has been made from bees that have gathered pollen from the Garden of Eden, a quill made of feathers from five angels (given freely), various herbs and flowers, and a scroll- with papyrus gathered in the Holy land and wood from an ancient tree. No blood at least….. oh wait, blood of a prior prophet made into ink. Ick. Riley turned to her search, wondering how all the ingredients would be put together into a spell. Clearly some form of writing on the scroll, but how did that then turn into an amulet? Not her department, she decided.

 Quiet settled over the room.

 Riley continued to shiver, though it was hardly noticeable. But it was distracting to her. About five minutes into her search she considered getting up to get a blanket. But before she could actually move she felt something warm drape over her shoulders.

 Riley swung her gaze up to find Gabriel settling into the chair next to her, kicking his feet up on the table, leaning back, eyes closed. His obvious movements were a good distraction, because neither Sam or Jack noticed that Gabriel was no longer wearing his jacket, and that it now was settled over Riley’s shoulders. Instead they’d zeroed in on him for a moment before letting their gazes drop back to their respective laptops.

 The jacket was warm and still smelled like him. As the boys were currently not paying her any mind, Riley took a moment to raise her hands and bring the jacket fuller around herself. It also gave her the opportunity to breath in the scent that lingered.

 For some reason, Riley had become oddly attached to the jacket. It was probably because Gabriel seemed to always offer it as a form of comfort. A thoughtful act meant that he was aware of her and was actively interested in seeing to her needs. It was really nice and gave Riley this tummy turning feeling of happiness.

 In her head, Riley sent him a quiet thank you, and turned back to her computer. ‘You’re getting better at that, sugar.’ She startled a bit at the voice in her head. Hoping he hadn’t heard anything she’d been thinking before. No need for him to know her crush was growing.

 ‘So it does work this way.’ She thought back at him. Because she was definitely not going to call it praying. That was just too weird.

 ‘Bet I could make you pray to me. I’d be happy to fly us somewhere and prove it.’ His eyes were still closed, he was still leaning back, not giving any sign of movement except for the smirk on his lips.  

 ‘Stop it. I’m supposed to be working.’ She thought back. ‘And who’s to say you wouldn’t be praying my name.’ This was getting dangerously close to flirting.

 Who was she kidding, this was definitely flirting.

 ‘I’m willing to take that bet.’

 ‘Not tonight fly-boy.’

 ‘Does that mean some other night?’

 “Oh shut up.” She replied, out loud. Both Jack and Sam turned to stare at her. “Sorry. Internal monologue.” They gave her odd looks but turned back to their computers.

 ‘Very believable, tootsie pop.’

 ‘Those names are getting worse and worse. Can’t you just settle on one?’

 ‘I find myself with a fondness for Rye. Especially when you call me Whiskey.’ She glanced up and found his eyes half lidded, watching her. There was something in his gaze she couldn’t name, but it caused her toes to curl. Riley dropped her gaze and blushed, eyes staring straight down at her keyboard, refusing to engage further. She might say something she’d regret. Scratch that, no she’d probably not regret it. But it was way to soon to be admitting feelings.

 ‘Come on sugar, not going to say anything?’ There was amusement behind the thought. ‘Trickster got your tongue?’

 ‘Trying to decide how serious you are.’ She sent back. Then she closed her eyes and thought of what it would be like to kiss him. She pictured it clearly in her mind, painting the taste of his lips and the feel of her fingers tracing the smoothness of his cheek. She may not want to put words to her feelings yet, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t hint at it.

 Though she wondered if visuals were actual able to transfer through this form of link. Maybe not, as she found silence when she finally let the vision of them fade away.

 It took him a full minute to reply, ‘Oh Rye, you are playing a dangerous game.’ His thoughts were no longer amused, there was something deliciously dangerous and heated now.

 Riley jerked at the sound of the door. Almost guilty. Though she had nothing to feel guilty for.

 Still, it appeared that their little game was over, as the arrival of Dean and Castiel with the beer stopped further thought of flirting. “Aren’t you a sad looking bunch?” Dean said descending the stairs. “Let’s drink.” He hoisted a six pack.

 Gabriel’s eyes were still on her, though they were once again crinkled with amusement. But he made no move to reengage.

 ----------------------

 Despite Dean’s declaration, they did not turn away from their research.

 Instead they kept going, with Dean grabbing a chair and a book. And it was sooner than later that the Bunker began to fill with people Riley had only heard about.

 First came Ketch and Charlie. Ketch was exactly what Riley expected. Charlie was…. Not. Riley knew this was not the same Charlie from the brother’s stories, but it was hard not to compare the two. She thought it must be like meeting identical twins. Then Mary Winchester arrived. Surprisingly Mary threw her arms around Riley in a hug. “Hi.” Riley said, voice muffled against Mary’s shoulder. Mary pulled back, and farmed Riley’s face with her hands. “You’re a cute thing. Dean’s told me all about you.” Mary was more affectionate that Riley had thought her to be. But then, Mary was a mother.

 “I hope good things?” Riley chuckled. Mary just smiled and went on to hug her boys, though Riley thought it strange that Sam seemed to somewhat avoid contact with Mary. And only hugged her long enough not to appear odd. Riley wondered what the full story was. She hadn’t gotten that yet.

 There was general chitchat all around, as both Castiel and Gabriel left, returning with Jody, another woman, and three younger girls. The other woman smiled widely, and hugged Riley. “Donna.” She introduced herself, “Sherriff Donna Hanscum.” The other girls were introduced as Alex, Claire, and Patience. They were not the huggy type.

 Jody hugged her though, and this hug Riley was expecting, and looking forward too. Jody was a friend, and Riley’s first real lifeline in this world. “I’m so glad to see you.” Jody said warmly.

 Eventually Sam cleared his throat and drew everyone’s attention. He motioned the table and everyone took seat, turning to him. “Okay, so think we can find the new prophet with a spell. But the ingredients are not exactly run of the mill.”

 “When are they ever?” Ketch murmured, his accent strong with his derision.

 Sam continued like he hadn’t heard Ketch, “We’re spitting the list up by area. And we’ll split off into groups, go get what we can, come back, and if we need to regroup, we’ll regroup.” Sam started handing out list he’d been making. “Let’s talk about two of these first. Hawaii.” Everyone perked up at that. Usually the team went to small towns and dark alleys, not tropical islands. “So the water from where rainbows fall is actually a misnomer, it’s literally rainbow falls. A waterfall in Hilo, Hawaii called Waiānuenue, which translates to rainbow falls. It falls into a small pool that flows over a natural lava cave.” He nodded to Riley as the information had come from her, “According to the lore,” he added, “the lava cave is the mythological home to Hina, an ancient Hawaiian goddess. So, whoever goes, be careful. We’ve met pagan gods before, not all of them nice.”

 Dean sent a pointed glare at Gabriel, who waved his hand dismissively.

 Sam continued, “As to the tears of the earth, the lore actually says this refers to Volcanos. In ancient times, Volcanos were thought to be caused by the earth crying. And in fact, in Hawaii there are small bits of molten lava that cool quickly and solidify into glass particles shaped like tear drops. They’re referred to as Pele’s tears, who is the goddess of volcanos.”

 “So whoever goes to Hawaii might have to face off with two pagan goddesses.” Charlie said thoughtfully. “Could be fun.”

 “Some of the others are simple. A baby’s first laugh.”

 “I can get that.” Alex said, “From the hospital.”

 “The feathers.” Sam said.

 Dean looked over at Castiel. “Cas, can you get several of the angels to give them?”

 “Angel’s feathers are very precious. It is not a simple as it sounds.” Castiel said. “But I will ask.”

 “Rowena’s probably got access to most of the herbs.” Sam added, “But we ought to get fresh, just in case.”

 “That sounds like a job for us.” Jody offered, indicating herself and Donna. “So we don’t have to go too far afield.”

 “The scroll is harder.” Sam said, “We need to make papyrus. It’s time consuming, but we need the reeds first.”

 “Cas?” Dean asked.

 “I will get them.”

 “If you do, I can work on making the scroll.” Mary offered.

 “The ancient tree refers to redwoods.”

 “Oooh. Cali.” Claire said. “I’ll volunteer for that.”

 “The blood.” Sam sighed, “Won’t be hard to get, just unpleasant.”

 “I will do it.” Ketch offered. Not surprisingly, no one else volunteered.

 “Now the other water. It’s a biblical reference. In Genesis, the Bible talks about four rivers flowing out of the garden. The first two are the Tigris and the Euphrates. No one can agree on the other two.”

 “They don’t exist on any maps.” Gabriel said. “But you get water from the riverhead in Eden.”

 “Which goes along with the wax.” Sam added.

 “I can go.” Gabriel offered.

 “Modern day Syria.” Castiel said. “I obtained fruit from there recently. There are djinn.”

 “Eh.” Gabriel said, “No problem.”

 “Then we need that water and the other blessed.” Sam said.

 “Father Luca might be willing.” Dean said.

 “A quick trip to Malta.” Sam said sarcastically. “But yes, he’d probably bless it for us.”

 “What did you guys do before angels?” Claire said half sarcastically.

 “We drove.” Dean muttered.

 With the lists split up, the team started to discuss routes and travel plans. Dean broke out the beer and snacks.

 The angels took off after the list had been divided up. Riley had felt a moment’s sadness as Gabriel departed, but knew they all had things they needed to do. Still, she wished they could talk. They hadn’t had a chance to spend any time together since Boston. And she hoped she hadn’t taken the whole mental flirting thing too far.

Everyone else had stayed at the bunker overnight, and in the morning they’d all headed out to start collecting the ingredients.

Castiel had popped back in the morning to grab and then drop off Mary and Charlie in Hawaii, Jody, Donna and Alex at their homes. Then he headed to heaven to ask about the feathers and on to get the papyrus. Claire and Patience headed to California by car. Ketch had headed to get the blood.

Sam and Dean were going to hold down the fort.

----------------------------

Finding herself useless at this point, Riley went shopping with Jack. The kid kind of loved shopping. There were lots of distracting things. And families. He really liked to watch the families. So she’d taken him to the mall.

He needed clothes anyway. He didn’t quite fit in Sam or Dean’s hand-me-downs. And the boys didn’t know much about fashion other than suits and flannel, so she didn’t trust them to take Jack shopping. She giggled, ‘okay, have to retract that. I should give them more credit. Sam and Dean can dress up pretty damn well when they want to. And Dean could probably make a paper bag look good….. but not the point.’  

While Jack was trying on a few pairs of pants and shirt, she was looking through the beauty section. Sighing, Riley popped the top on allegedly coconut scented shampoo and sniffed. She’d been running low on some of her toiletries and took the opportunity to try something new. The department store she was in had a decent variety of things.

The coconut stuff was placed back on the shelf as she moved on. She grabbed one that didn’t have a scent name but seemed to be a salon shampoo with a green label. She opened it and sniffed, grinning. It smelled like skittles. Gabriel would love it. “Not that I’m shopping with him in mind or anything.” She muttered to herself. Yet she found herself putting the skittled shampoo into her basket.

After checking on the kid and changing out one size shirt for another for him, she wandered through the women’s clothing. Spying a rack of tank tops, Riley began perusing. She laughed when she came across a cute black one. It read ‘sweet as sugar’ in gold lettering, with lollipops on either side. Grabbing her size, she shoved in into her basket before she could think about it too hard.

‘I’m going a bit overboard.’ She sighed. But she didn’t put it back.

Jack finished by the time she wandered back the men’s section. He added two pairs of pants and a couple of the shirts to the basket. “Can we look at video games.” He sounded so excited that Riley caved.

“I’ll meet you at the game store.” She said with a smile. He hugged her quick, then turned and hurried off toward the mall entrance. Riley felt a wave of affection, Jack was like a little brother. She had come to care for him. And seeing him acting like a normal kid made her heart happy. Sometimes, secretly, she’d wish he and the Winchesters could just be happy for once. She’d come to care for them all so much and for the rest of the team.

Standing in the middle of the store, she thought of the speech from Lilo & Stitch: ‘This is my family. I found it, all on my own. It's little, and broken, but still good. Yeah, still good.’

 It took her a moment to shake the feels away. But she did and paid for her basket worth of things, and then headed to meet Jack.

[avengerofyourheart]

Mess is Mine (Tony Stark x reader)

Hey, guys. I’ve been sitting on this finished fic for almost a month, which is rare for me, but I think it’s time to post. It’s nice to read it with fresh eyes and give it a polish before posting. I really hope you all like this.

____________________________________________________

Mess is Mine (Tony Stark x reader)

Characters: reader, Tony, Steve, Clint, Sam, JARVIS.

Summary: After a mission goes awry, Tony’s response causes a rift between the two of you until an unexpected late night encounter causes you to see a different side of Tony. (events occur around the beginning of Iron Man 3, some dialogue is borrowed)

Warnings: angst, fluff, mentions of anxiety, home invasion and violence (mild). 

Word Count: 2630

Tags are at the bottom.

A/N: This fic is inspired by the song Mess is Mine by Vance Joy and that line of Tony’s in IM3. Special thanks to my love, my darling @sebseyesandbuckysthighs for the Tony expertise and willingness to share her firsthand anxiety knowledge. I suffer from high functioning anxiety myself, but rarely have full-on attacks. However, the reader’s cause for anxiety and OCD is my own. I wish I had taken the same action afterward, though. I hope this is a comfort to some. Roo, you are my mess and I am yours. I love you. 

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Exiting the Quinjet like a bat outta hell, you were fuming. Steve tried to reason with you, but you didn’t even hear the words he spoke before he stepped aside with a look of fear in his eyes. All you needed was to get to Tony so that you could slap that smug grin off his carefully manscaped face. The man was insufferable. And wrong.

_____________

The mission was going smoothly so far, when suddenly all hell broke loose with HYDRA agents surrounding you, Steve, and Tony. Every level of the compound had been cleared from the top down until Tony blasted open the thick steel door to the basement, believed to be full of documents, experimental serums, and other sensitive HYDRA information. Which was all true, according to intel, but what had been missed in surveillance was the two other hidden doors to the basement that had spilled out the bad guys behind you and now you had no exit strategy.

There was a moment of a stalemate: Steve with his shield, Tony in his suit with blasters up at the ready, and you with a pistol in each hand, just behind them. The HYDRA agents—at least twenty— each had a gun trained on the three of you. Even as Avengers, you were outmatched and were backed up against a wall. Sam and Clint were on their way from the jet, but at least 5 minutes out. A lot can happen in 5 minutes. Attempting to keep panic at bay, you thought it through. There was really only one solution.

You holstered your weapons and stepped around your fellow Avengers with hands raised.

“Y/N, what the hell are you doing?!?” Steve loudly whispered.

You took a few steps forward toward the armed enemy.

“Get back here, Y/N!” barked Tony, probably meant as an order but you just turned your head and sent him a wink.

“Hey, fellas,” you grinned, addressing the twenty men all clad in heavy black battle gear. “Look, I don’t want to start anything here, so if you could just let us pass, that’d be great.”

The agent closest to you smiled underneath his helmet, “Is that right, sweetheart?”

He took a step forward to tell you how wrong you were, you would guess, but as he did, he also lowered his gun slightly and was now within reach. In that split moment, you grabbed the barrel of his rifle and pulled, putting him off-balance. You took advantage of that and kicked his legs out from under him and fired his own weapon at his colleagues, taking down 5 of the men in seconds. Steve and Tony jumped into action, taking on the rest of the men as you continued to attacked the still-surprised agents. Within two minutes the floor was littered with unconscious men and the three Avengers stood tall, chests heaving with effort.

Tony attached an explosive to the wall next to the basement door and set it for two minutes. It would’ve been nice to get the intel, but considering this twist of events, best case scenario was that HYDRA couldn’t have it either. The two of you ran through the compound, Tony flying ahead, as you counted down in your head.

39….38…37….

Breaking through the door to outside, Sam and Clint reached your location headed toward you.

“Go!! Go!! Get to the jet!” Steve yelled.

The two men stumbled and changed direction, seconds later the blast you could feel in your rib cage. You were at a safe distance, though, as you continued to run. You broke through the trees with the Quinjet in sight. All of you boarded, Clint reached the pilot seat to start the jet. You braced your hands on your knees, catching your breath. Facing Steve and Tony, you smiled, hand up for a victory high-five. The two men shook their heads, faces serious.

“What was that, Y/N?!? You could have been killed! I can’t…” Tony had retracted his helmet, showing his angry expression.

“You could have warned us first, Y/N,” Steve offered in a stern tone.

“Are you kidding me? We had seconds before they were going to open fire and you wanted a powwow first? I did what needed to be done! Those doofus HYDRA goons only know how to follow orders, no original thought, so I gave them something else to focus on. They always underestimate a woman. And it worked, didn’t it?” you said defiantly, arms crossed over your chest.

“It was reckless and stupid!” yelled Tony.

You scoffed, “That’s rich, coming from you.”

His eyes grew wide, jaw slack as he walked away a few steps. “That’s it. I’m done. You’re benched until further notice.”

“What?!? You can’t do that! Steve…”

“Steve may be the boss, but I’m the bankroll. And if I decide someone shouldn’t be on MY jet then it doesn’t take off. End of discussion.” At that word, Tony replaced his helmet and flew off instead of joining the team in the jet. He rarely did that, careful about the suit’s power and long flights were draining for him but apparently he preferred it to arguing with you.

Speechless, you turned to Steve.

“Hey, he has a point. Maybe you should take a step back,” he conceded, walking further into the jet.

“Unbelievable!” you said, exasperated.

______________

The ride home had been tense, to say the least. You had hours to yourself to fume and come up with arguments and comebacks, especially since everyone was afraid to approach you.

Now you were storming through the Malibu mansion the Avengers temporarily called home, making a beeline for Tony’s lab. Reaching the glass door, you could see him with his back to you, tinkering with something on a table. You placed your hand on the fingerprint scanner for entry and you were met with a red light of denial. Rubbing your hand on your pants to dry it, you tried again. Red light.

“JARVIS, let me in!”

“My apologies, Ms. Y/L/N, but Mr. Stark has asked me to delete your access to the lab.”

“He what?!?” you screamed, banging a flat hand on the glass. “Tony!!”

He turned toward you, having heard his name despite the muffled sound through the glass.

“Open this door right now!”

He cupped his hand to his ear, mouthing the words WHAT? I CAN’T HEAR YOU.

“That would hold more water if you hadn’t RESPONDED TO YOUR NAME 5 SECONDS AGO. What’re you gonna do, hide out in your little Boys Club with a sign out front that says ‘No Girls Allowed’?  “

He considered it, stroking his chin. “Pretty much,” he blurted, wiggling his fingers as he put his back to you.

“Ugh, you are SUCH A CHILD. Have fun sleeping alone tonight!!” you threatened before stomping away to your room.

Unbeknownst to the rest of the team, you and Tony had been seeing each other casually for a few months. Nothing too serious, but it seemed to be headed that way until this mission brought it all to a halt. You thought he liked your fiery spirit and occasional tendency for dramatics, but apparently that was now being used against you.

You didn’t see him for two days. He was holed up in his lab and you were consumed with rage which you attempted to burn out in the gym. After 48 hours, though, you were just tired. Tired of being angry, tired after hours at the gym, and tired because sleep was eluding you from all the one-sided conversations in your head.

Around 1am you had made some chamomile tea and settled into a comfy chair just off the kitchen with the lights off, hoping to become drowsy. 15 minutes later your eyes were growing heavy when you heard footsteps approach. Opening the fridge, the light spilled out illuminating Tony in a tank top and sweats, his shoulders sagging. You could tell he was tired and upset, too. Setting down your tea, you stood and approached slowly.

“Tony,” you spoke.

He jumped at your voice, grabbing a bottle of ketchup to “defend” himself, before he relaxed. “Y/N. You scared the hell out of me.”

You rounded the counter toward him, trying to offer an open, non-confrontational expression, “I don’t want to fight, but we need to talk about…”

“Y/N! I can’t right now, I’m sorry, I…”

“What, you don’t have the time right now? It’s the middle of the night and I’m done letting you avoid me! You can’t just drop a command and bench me without even..”

“Yes I can! You don’t just go up against 20 armed men and put yourself in danger like that. I won’t let you.”

An angry burst of laughter escaped your lips, “You must be joking. You literally flew a bomb into a hole in the sky and I don’t remember you asking for anyone’s permission first. You almost died!! I watched you fall, I mean…”

“Y/N…please….” Tony began to walk slowly toward the seating area, avoiding your gaze.

“Please what? You don’t get to bogart all the stupid and reckless in the world, I did what I had to do and that’s exactly what you did in New York. I get that, so why…”

“Please stop!!” Tony had finally turned your way and you could see the change in him. He was pale with a light sheen of sweat on his skin, eyes wide as he struggled to breathe. You knew that look.

Concern took over, “Tony. Talk to me, what’s happening?”

He clutched the arm of the couch as if his legs would no longer support him. You came to his side, putting an arm around his waist as you guided him to the couch and he sat.

You knelt beside him, “Tony. Tell me what you need. How can I help?” You didn’t want to impose or make it worse.

He grasped your hand and squeezed it tight.

“Tony, look at me,” when he didn’t respond, you lightly put a finger under his chin to turn his face toward you. “Tony, where are you?”

A few labored breaths and he finally answered, “Home.”

“Good and is there an immediate threat right now? Besides my fiery temper?” you asked with a hint of humor.

He finally met your eye, seeing a softness there, “No.”

“Okay. Breathe with me,” you placed Tony’s hand on your upper chest above your heart as you inhaled and exhaled slowly. Tony focused on your breathing and slowly started to mirror it with his own.

A few more minutes and the worst seemed to have passed. Tony’s head fell back on the couch as he rubbed his face, exhausted.

You spoke first, “Why didn’t you tell me you’ve been having anxiety attacks?”

He dropped his hand from his face and looked at you, “I didn’t even realize that’s what was happening until recently. I thought I was just dying.”

You gave a smile, brushing a lock of hair from his sweaty forehead.

“Wait, how did you know?”

“About what was happening just now? I’ve had them for years.”

“What? You never mentioned it,” he said, cocking his head.

“Well, I guess we’re even then, huh?” you joked. “They started when I was 14 or so. Someone broke into the family home one night and made off with some jewelry and electronics, all while we blissfully slept. Waking up the next morning knowing a stranger had been there and that our safe haven had been breeched, I felt…violated.  I didn’t feel safe anymore. I started resisting going to bed and hated being alone at night. I would compulsively check windows and doors to make sure they were locked. I think I slept on my parents’ floor a few times. It just wasn’t getting any better, in fact, it got worse whenever I felt like I couldn’t control anything.”

Tony brought your hand up to his lips, nuzzling it against his stubbled cheek.

“So my mom suggested I take some self-defense classes, you know, take back some control. I excelled and had my blackbelt by the age of 17 which is when I considered law enforcement. Instead, I went to college and applied for the FBI before graduation and that led to SHIELD, which led to the Avengers and then led me to you.”

He offered a wide, generous smile then, “You’re the best.”

You pressed a kiss to his lips, laying your hand on his chest.

“But me? I’m a piping hot mess. Nothing’s been the same since New York. You experience things, and then they’re over and you still can’t explain them? God’s, aliens, other dimensions...I’m just a man in a can. The only reason I haven’t cracked up is because I’ve got you. Or I hope I’ve got you. But honey…I can’t sleep. I go to my lab and I do what I know. I tinker. The threat IS imminent with how often we’re out on missions. And I have to protect the one thing I can’t live without. That’s you. I didn’t want to ruin a good thing by dumping all this on you.”

“Hey, this whole mess?” your hand waving to indicate all of Tony, “This mess is MINE. You are all mine. You’ve definitely got me. And I’ve got you. I love you. You don’t have to carry this alone.”

“Thank you,” he whispered, offering a teary smile. Until the cockiness returned. “You know…that’s the first time you’ve said that, you know. The ‘L word’. “

“You caught that, huh? Thoughts on the subject?” you teased, nervous about your confession.

He stared off into the distance, as if in deep deliberation, “I’m thinking…”

“Tony!” you shouted, giving him a playful shove.

He laughed, pulling you into his lap, “There’s nothing to think about. I love you, too, Y/N.”

“Well, good,” you said in relief, bending down for a long, lingering kiss. When you pulled back, he kept you close.

“So how do you do it? How do you deal?”

You sighed, “Practice. I’ve found certain skills that can lessen, if not prevent, an attack when I feel it coming on. Meditation for one…breathing exercises…yoga…”

“Ah, so that’s why you’re so bendy,” he wiggled his eyebrows at you.

“Mmhmm. You’re welcome,” you grinned with a wink, before getting serious again. “Really, though, I can’t say I’m glad that anxiety has been such an unwanted companion through most of my life, but it’s brought me to where I am now. There’s so much these days that is out of our control, especially now. But we can choose how we respond to it and I’m right here with you to figure it out.”

He captured your lips then for a kiss, his facial hair tickling your chin. “Maybe you could -kiss- show me -kiss- some of those -kiss- bendy moves right now.”

Tony shifted so you were lying on the couch, him settling between your legs.

“Right here?”

“Why not? It’s my house.”

You laughed, “I’m game. But seriously, that whole benched thing is not…”

He silenced you with a kiss, “We’ll talk about it tomorrow.”

“Yeah, we will,” you promised, lifting his tank top over his head.

You took a moment to marvel in his beauty, electro magnet and all, as you ran your hands over his sculpted abs. It took a lot for you both to get here, but now you just wanted to savor the moment. You were in love with the Billionaire not-so-Playboy-anymore Philanthropist who also happens to be a mess. But he was YOUR beautiful mess, you thought, as he proved his love to you right then and there on the living room couch.

_________________________________________________

So? Any thoughts are appreciated!! This was actually the first Tony fic I wrote but have since published one and I feel like I have a better handle on writing him now. I hope to do more Tony fics in the future. Also, I love Pepper Potts but I wish she had been more sympathetic in IM3. That’s kinda why I wanted to write this. Send me your feedback in any form you want: message, ask, reblog, reply, whatever. I love you guys!! :)

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[hatnews3-blog]

The Walking Dead Recap: What You Don't Know Will Hurt You

Psst — can you keep a secret? Yeah, me, neither. So the following recap of Sunday’s episode of The Walking Dead includes two big reveals, one even more surprising than the other, and details the turn of events that seems destined to bring crashing down Rick’s bridge over troubled water. Now that you’ve been forewarned, do you still want to proceed? Read on, then.

‘THANK YOU… FOR YOU’ | After “Warning Signs” began with a zombified Justin rising to join the ranks of the undead, we flashed to the morning after, at which point Rick got up early to leave a fresh-picked tomato fit for the cover of Bon Appetit at what I assume was Carl’s grave (not that Carl could possibly appreciate its magnificence — that was one hot tomato). Upon returning home, Rick thanked Michonne for all of her hard work on the charter and beyond, then, with a twinkle in his eye, asked her to put aside that work. “You want me to stop creating the foundations of a new civilization?” she asked. “I can think of another way to build for the future,” he replied. Yup, they were gonna try to get pregnant. Which, honestly, seemed like a pretty bad idea, considering that at that moment, Maggie and her delivery of food were being held up by Jed and a bunch of hostile Saviors who were out looking for Justin — aaand thinking that maybe “the widow” was behind the string of recent disappearances. Jed even went so far as to steal a tomato. (And seriously, special props to the show’s tomato stylist — those things are gorgeous!) Only moments after the situation was defused by Laura, who I never dreamed I’d kinda like, Maggie spotted down the road — what are the odds? — the walkerized Justin!

Back in Alexandria, all hell was breaking loose. In other words, Rick Grimes was on all fours playing horsey-race down the hallway with Judith as a part of the family fun day that he and Michonne had to promise the moppet to get her to see Siddiq about her cough. Alas, the trio had just begun the reading-The-Wizard-of-Oz portion of their day when word reached Rick that Justin wasn’t just dead, he’d been murdered. Quicker than you could say “panic,” the Saviors at base camp for the bridge project were looking ready to riot. First Alden, then Carol tried to break it up, but that was easier said than done. Jed, clearly Season 9’s answer to Jared, up and dared her to just shoot him already rather than make him wait to get it in the back. In no time, fingers were being pointed at likely suspects. Daryl, for one. “Garbage lady,” for another. For a second, it looked like the Saviors were willing to go through Gabriel to attack Anne. Luckily, that was when Rick rode in to lay down the law. As soon as the crowd dispersed, Rick questioned Gabriel, who insisted that he’d been with his new lover for the duration of the previous evening.

‘I LIED TO HIM… FOR YOU’ | Next, Rick was approached by Alden, who suggested that, if at least a few key Saviors had guns, they wouldn’t be so scared. No dice, so Alden turned to Maggie. “You trust me, don’t you?” he asked. “How about trusting a few other people who’ve made a change?” Ultimately, Rick agreed to think about it — after he solved Justin’s murder. Which, given how much like an arrow wound the deceased’s chest injury looked, he might have already done. “Go ahead,” said Daryl when Rick sidled up for an uncomfortable interrogation. “Ask.” When Rick did just that, Daryl said that he could prove that he was innocent — because “if I’d-a killed him, I’d-a killed him in plain sight.” Again, Rick made his sales pitch, arguing that the future belonged to all of them now. Not Glenn, Daryl pointed out. Not Abraham or Sasha. Cornered, Rick admitted that he’d wanted to slaughter the Saviors, too. “But killing each other when the world already belongs to the dead, it’s not the way, not anymore.” Furthermore, if Daryl would try — just try — to play nice, maybe people could see what was possible. It might even turn out to be one of the best decisions he’d made since “not killing a guy who left your brother on a rooftop to die.”

Meanwhile, Gabriel, feeling conflicted about lying to Rick about being with Anne all night, asked his girlfriend if she’d seen anything when they were apart. “You think I’m hiding something?” she replied. And his silence spoke as large a volume as her answering a question with a question. While that romance was hitting a rough patch, Maggie and Cyndie were among the pairs out looking for walkers in the woods (lest anyone besides Aaron lose an arm to a sneak attack). When they spotted a couple of zombies loitering around, Cyndie revealed that there was a house nearby — she knew because her family had lived in the area before Oceanside — and suggested that maybe the walkers were being drawn to it. Lo and behold, a bunch of the undead were trapped in the residence, and their argh-ing was attracting more of their kind. There wasn’t a whole lot to this, aside from it giving Daryl and Cyndie another chance to bond when he arrived suddenly and saved her from walkers who broke out of the house faster than expected. The real point of the side jaunt was that Daryl’s rescue party shouldn’t have arrived before Bea and Arat’s. (If you could remember who Bea was at this point, good on you!)

‘I JUST WANTED TO END IT BEFORE IT BEGINS’ | Soon, the search party found Bea knocked out but not Arat. Did everybody notice that Bea’s weapon looked like it could have made the same kind of hole in Justin as an arrow? Daryl certainly did. Anyway, since the Savior’s gear was left behind, Maggie deduced that whoever had whacked Bea now had Arat. At a subsequent bigwigs’ powwow, Carol reported that the Saviors thought that Arat was on watch overnight. If the main characters didn’t find her by dawn, Rick would lose his worker bees, and the unfinished bridge would come tumbling down when the waters rose again. Before they set off to look for the missing person, Jerry had an important question: When they found the guilty party, who’d decide their fate? And what about the punishment? “Is it gonna be a Gregory or a Negan?” Later, searching the woods with Rick, Carol admitted that she’d badly wanted to shoot Jed. What’s more, she was sure that the disaster they’d narrowly averted that day wasn’t going to stay, you know, averted. In response, Rick confessed that there was a point in every day when he just wanted to go finish off Negan. “But then I remember everyone we’ve lost… and I know I need to honor them — to build life, not take it, because it’s us or the dead, and every life counts now.”

Searching for Arat with Daryl, Maggie wished that she could see things Rick’s way. She even acknowledged that “what [he’s] doing is right for the future. It’s better for Hershel.” Just then, they found another Savior who’d been offed like Justin, and Columbo — sorry, I mean Daryl — announced, “I know who took Arat.” While the twosome set off like a post-apocalyptic Hardy Boy and Nancy Drew, Anne snuck back to the Heaps. There, she took out a hidden radio and, having spotted the chopper the night before, made a call. “What do you have, an A or a B?” asked the man who replied. “I paid my share,” she insisted. But when it became apparent that that wasn’t going to get her what she wanted — presumably, a ride out of danger? — she asked what it would take. “An A,” the guy answered (and suddenly, I remembered that, when Jadis had held Rick hostage, it had been in a container marked A). No sooner had Anne said she’d have an A tomorrow than Gabriel appeared and demanded the truth. Turned out, she’d been trading people for supplies for the Scavengers. That was what she’d been going to do with Rick and Gabriel. Now, given her spot at the top of the murder-suspects list, she was giving up on the new leaf she’d turned over and wanted out. “There’s another place that’s far from here,” she said, “but if we go together, we can get there.”

‘IT’S OVER’ | Though Gabriel took Anne’s hand, he couldn’t agree to her terms: Don’t tell anyone, and help her with “one small part of the deal.” He’d have to tell Rick. “And all this time,” she said, “I thought you were a B.” With that, she knocked him out. As if trying to have an even worse night than Gabriel, Carol got herself grabbed in the woods by Jed, who held a knife to her throat and threatened to Ginsu her if Rick didn’t hand over his gun. See, the Saviors are “vamoosing out of your little pet project,” he explained, and they needed protection for the trip home. “You do this, there’s no going back,” Rick warned. Trouble was, there had been no going back for Jed and the Saviors once they’d lost Justin (who must have been much more delightful at the Sanctuary than he ever was outside of it). As will happen when a fool threatens Carol, she turned the tables, stabbing Jed with her own knife. “Why not just take me out?” he cried, defeated. “‘Cause every life counts,” Carol spat as if the words left an aftertaste in her mouth.

Finally, Maggie escorted Daryl to the place where Cyndie’d once lived. There, they found Cyndie, Bea and another Oceansider menacing Arat — not without cause. The Saviors had murdered Cyndie’s mother, her 11-year-old brother, Bea’s husband, countless others. “We’ve all done things,” Arat protested. After the war, Cyndie continued, she and her fellow Oceansiders had gone along with Rick’s plan for unification because they didn’t think they had a choice. Then Maggie had hung Gregory. “You showed us the way,” Cyndie told the Hilltop’s leader. “It was time.” For a moment, it appeared that Maggie and Daryl might intervene on Arat’s behalf. Then, Cyndie recalled how Arat had smiled when killing her kid brother. And what was it that the Savior had said? “No exceptions.” So Maggie and Daryl turned and walked away, leaving Arat to be murdered while screaming that she’d changed. The following day, as the Saviors all left behind the bridge project, Maggie told Daryl that Cyndie had shown her the way, too. “We gave Rick’s way a chance,” she said. “It’s time to see Negan.”

So, what did you think of “Warning Signs”? Did you guess who was killing the Saviors? Do you suspect that the people Anne’s trading with are using her victims as lab rats in hopes of curing zombie-ism? Hit the comments.

Source: https://tvline.com/2018/10/21/the-walking-dead-recap-season-9-episode-3-oceanside-killing-saviors/

[apsbicepstraining]

Meet The Women Who Would Rather Have A Perfect Body Than Sex

Sex is an essential part of a caring rapport. When one or both parties decide that they no longer wishes to get wise on, such relationships can often come apart. In report, virility is quoted as the weigh length 1 reasons for long-term couples break up.

Whilst it is normal to go through dry incantations, most pairs are willing to throw in a little bit additional endeavor in the bedroom to get happens steamy again. Even though it’s inevitable that they will have less sexuality as such relationships goes on, it shouldn’t stop entirely. Appearances are more important than ever in 2017, and several beings go to extreme sections in order is still in peak physical representation. Nonetheless, it is about to change that there are a number of parties out there who are now relinquishing adultery for the perfect torso. Logic might prescribe that the fitter “you think youre”, the more masculinity you will have, but the University of North Carolina has been demonstrated that extreme hire governments can kill a person’s sex drive. What’s more is the fact that it happens practically instantaneously. For obvious rationales, expending too much age at the gym reason beings to become too tired to get frisky in the bedroom. But situations of extreme work authority likewise ground an under-functioning pituitary gland, which translates into low levels of testosterone and estrogen. Women, including with regard to, are susceptible to the side effects of applying too much. We required a certain period of being flab for our reproduction systems to function. Without it, we’re unable to have children, and this leads to the absence of a sex drive. Four female fitness maniacs lately opened up about how the gym has affected their lust lives, and their rebuttals are offending to say the least. After reading about its own experience, you’ll be forgiving yourself for having that additional cheat daytime … Twenty-five year old-fashioned Nikki Harvey demonstrates that whilst her hard core utilization government has improved her cheerfulnes and wellbeing, it is unable to lead to the end of her long-term relation with her 26 -year-old partner Jordan Burgess, a personal lecturer. “In the autumn of 2014, I was a length 16, liquor, smoking, living off junk food and generally fairly sorry, ” Harvey said. “One night I obligated Jordan and we swiftly became an item.” “He’s a rugby musician and he caught me exclaiming to myself in my bedroom when I couldn’t will be incorporated into my width 14 expends. He told me anyone can veering “peoples lives” around and encouraged me to get health and take up fitness and bodybuilding.” “I signed up for a 14 -week intensive pulpit, pushing me harder than I ever dreamed possible. I cherished every second. Every gram of folly heavines was stripped from my organization- better than any faddy diet.”

“I now prepares every morning at 5:30 am for two hours, then do an hour’s cardio every evening.” “It rightfully impacts on my concept. I haven’t been participating in a appointment darknes with Jordan since January, and my libido has vanished.” “Right now I have zero sex drive so Jordan and I haven’t well-developed fervor for 2 month. Jordan hates it, but he knows it’s not because I don’t fancy him. I enjoy my read so much better that two months ago I quit my job to do it full time.” “In April I came second in the UK Bodybuilding and Fitness Federation National Finals and is eligible for three international championships.” “My libido might be gone, but I seem most effective and am now so much better healthier. I plainly hopes that Jordan will stick by me without sex.” Unlike Harvey , nonetheless, the next interviewee has stopped having relation wholly and believes that her brand-new behavior is worthwhile … Gabriella Prior, who is just 22 years old, said that she has not had fornication in over 18 months. She last-place got it on around the time that she started her gruelling fitness regiman, and now she wishes being fit to having a good fornication life. “At the commencement of 2016, I did almost no exert. I went out boozing, experienced lazy weekends, had admirers and a health perversion life, ” she said. “I wasn’t depressed, but I felt like I didn’t have any hobbies.” “One morning, on a impulse, I decided to join the nearby House of Pain boxing gym. I was uneasy, but when I left I was so full of energy, I couldn’t just waiting do it again.” “Exercising is nows like anti-retroviral remedies to me. Within weeks. I was improving twice a span for two hours each age, five or six days per week. I still do that now.” “It’s 100 percentage endeavor civilize with sums, sparring and cardio. Boxing isn’t a sporting you do by halves. I is also difficult to tie my shoe laces after I have finished a hearing, let alone should be considered fornication. I used to have admirers, but they moved their course.” “Now I don’t have time to meet humen. I have recognized I don’t need a relationship or copulation to be happy. I cost freedom and fitness more than I theorized possible. My relation life now is a dim and remote memory.” “I hope that if I ever want to, I can reduce the strength of my training and then get my libido back. But I’m not inconvenienced now.” “I’ve had a couple of short-lived circumstances since I started improving but rapidly I’ve been ceased since they are ideology I was carrying, as I did not want to have sex all the time.” “I have been crowned Miss Fitness Inspiration UK, which entails more to me than any period of sex.” It’s no secret that some people have far higher sex drives than others. Prior to get fit, the next daughter interviewed was get down and soiled almost every night of the week. Now she’s not had fornication in months … The at commencing from a relationship is exciting, and it’s often when couples have the most immorality. Scrutinizing your partner’s party and getting to know their likes and furies is extremely important if such relationships got to go last-place. So it simply discerned sense that 25 -year-old Milly Mahoney’s partner, 26 -year-old Manny Tankov, knew prevented when her libido pitched after she reached the gym after previously having sexuality almost every night of the week. Her extreme dedication to fitness is now putting a real strain on their relationship. “I recollect understanding a friend’s washboard gut on vacation three years ago and thinking, ‘ I want that.’ I’d done a little bit of legislating before, but knew I had to punched the heaviness to get the body I missed. So I met a gym.” “Five or six days a week I detect as hard as I can for two hours, to the point of fatigue. When Manny comes on to me, relation is the latest region I pray as I’m subdued. I push away his hands. He’s visibly thwarted and takes a few minutes to calm down.” “Before I started improving I would have sex at the very least five days a week, which seems strange now. I’m likewise obsessive about my diet, weighing every last gram of protein or carbs- which means we do not absorb takeaways together or have appointment nighttimes in eateries. I’ve been with Manny for 18 months and he understands how much I affection working out- it was my physique that first allured him.” “I’m training for a bikini dissension, and we haven’t had copulation for 2 month. I guess it’s a little bit like giving up boozing for a few months – you recognise how much better “youre feeling”, then when it comes to the end of the month, you wonder if you actually implore a concoction at all anymore.” “I experience phenomenal and is so great. No quantity of perversion outdistances that.” Whilst sex is an important part of a relationship, it’s not the only thing which saves two beings together. You could have the best adultery of their own lives with being, but be unable to hold a respectable exchange with them … Stacey Boyce securely is therefore of the view that her join can stand the test of her extreme fitness sovereignty, although she is acknowledged that if often leaves her just tired to even snuggle with her traitor. Building as a powwow administrator in a city 50 miles from her home was essential for her dawns start at 5 am so she can reached the gym, and she often mentions herself going to sleep after midnight- which has resulted in there’s no time for infidelity. “I have been qualifying really hard down at the gym since 2014. While I affection it and wouldn’t change a rubbish, it gets harder each year. I’m in the gym most day of the week, and my diet is so closely detected, it has become totally addictive for me.” “I have been with my husband, Mark, for six years old, and thankfully he also works in the fitness construct. He understands the course I am, to a certain extent, but the strain on our relationship is massive.” “Before I started with all the gym specified, it was totally different between the two of us. We would have sex at the very least three times a week. Now, sometimes we don’t talk for days- and having copulation even once a few months is a push.” “My libido is non-existent. I know I’m asking a lot from my organisation by promoting massive onus and sometimes I can’t even nuzzle. Every single muscle in my being soreness, clearing copulation exclusively out of the question.” “I’m wearied all the time, and when I’m speaking hard, I have hard pecs instead of tit, so clearly don’t ordeal at all attractive or feminine.” “I get so concentrate on myself, perpetually checking my loading, calibrating constitution flab, weighing nutrient and training for endless hours. I know it’s mighty selfish to behave in this way. But that’s how I became a 2015 British UK Ultimate Physiques Bikini Champion.” “Of course, masculinity is natural and fascinating. But if you are in a fond and understanding occasion, the sin can wait.” Personally, I’d be willing to sacrifice the amount of season I spent in the gym to the purposes of a relationship. After all , no rapport is without accommodation, and abundance of people who reached the gym are still able to have health virility lives. What do you think of these women? Would you be willing to give up gluttony in the work of the perfect being?

The post Meet The Women Who Would Rather Have A Perfect Body Than Sex appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

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[child-of-feathersandwings-blog]

Appropriation and Me

I’m sorry for this, but I have to rant, and vent this out, cause I’m tired of seeing this everywhere I look and no one actually understands how this works, or what it actually means, and It’s driving me up the wall. This and the fact that it’s literally on everything, like what next if I take a shit the wrong way I’m gonna get in trouble cause that’s how someone else does it in another culture and I can’t do that, cause that’s what it’s turning into. And hate me all you wish, but holy hell in a hand basket this has to stop. So if you wanna see my rant below, go for it, but it’s a rant, it’s my opinion on it, and if you got something to say, be civil. 

PS: examples used are due to personal connection

Dear god the amount of explaining and concepts and ideologies behind this one thing is enough to blow someones brains out worse than a 16 gauge shotgun goes through rabbits. In other words, it just blows my mind. Now don’t get me wrong there are just some things one shouldn’t do, which is disrespect a culture, be it the colour of their skin, their religion, or just something that is specific to that culture. It’s just wrong to do. If you don’t know anything about a culture, just walk away from it, leave it alone, no touchy the culture. However there is a very real misconception about what is appropriation and what isn’t. Cultural Appropriation:  The unacknowledged or inappropriate adoption of the customs, practices, ideas, etc. of one people or society by members of another. Now I don’t see anywhere in that definition from the Oxford Dictionary  where it states that using something from another culture is the problem. The problem is not the use of what is being appropriated, but not giving credit where credit is due, and not understanding its origins and how its is to be used. Again if you do not know about the culture, stay away from it. Then again, other things like terms and words that are used to describe certain things, it depends all on context of what you are using. For example, Smudging is specifically a Native American term so using smoke cleansing would be more appropriate, but a dream catcher, though having roots in Native American tradition and practice, is a literal term for the object described. It catches dreams, therefore it is a dream-catcher. You can make it out of sticks and twine, add some trinkets and say “hocus pocus, sleepy brain focus, bad dreams are bad and good dreams are good, and only good dreams can enter my minds neighbourhood” (literally an on the spot rhyme) its still being asked to catch bad dreams and thus its intent is to... catch dreams, making it a... dream catcher. you can call it by 50 other names and its still a bloody dream catcher. Having one or making one, does not make it a bad thing, calling it what it is, is not a bad thing. Saying you have no idea what its used for or the background behind it you just like it cause its pretty makes it a bad thing. Art is another one, especially for tattoos, there are styles and designs that have a very specific style to them, notably, Tribal, Hawaiian, Native American, etc. Now here’s the thing, Hawaiian, Native American and a few others, have a very specific design aspect and you can always tell when its done the right way, and the wrong way. Tribal, is a term used for a specific style of design, much like traditional and new wave, it can also be used to describe a Tribes own style of design. Mandala is another one with the same concept, it is a term for a specific design style but also used as a traditional sacred design. With both Mandala and Tribal, you can always tell when the design has been done properly to portray its correct heritage and meaning or when the artist has produced it from their own concept using the style it is named for. Using these art styles is neither wrong and should not be considered wrong for the person to have. If a person were to get say a Hawaiian tattoo in the specific style of Hawaiian tattoo design and was disrespectful towards its meaning, then its wrong, if its a bold lined with little dots and a gem wolf, done in a tribal style of the artists own hand, its neither disrespectful nor is it appropriating a culture, it is what it is. Be upset when its disrespectful, not when a person knows what it is they’re doing. If someone goes out and gets/makes one of those jingle dresses (I don’t know the name, I’m sorry, I just call them jingle dresses cause they jingle) that Native women and men wear while dancing, cause they like the look and cause of the sound, be mad and say something, not because they use a term from another culture, not because they own something from another culture, or do something or wear something. If you don’t know if they know anything about it, ask don’t just assume they are doing it because they are privileged and trying to take it. Some cultures, would rather we learn about them by doing. For example, the First Nations tribes of Canada, you can take a class and learn the culture and languages, partake in powwows, I even asked a Black foot lady (that’s the name of the tribe) if she could show me how to say see you again in Black foot, so I could speak to her in her language, and she was very happy that I asked. The Asian culture for a long time took a large interest in Anne of Green Gables enough to visit PEI and learn more about the history of the island and its culture. Many people that I know take classes from Japanese teachers to learn not only the language, but the culture also, and frequently speak and follow aspects of the culture. Most people of these cultures, don’t actually mind others learning about and using terms and languages from their culture as long as we are respecting where it’s originally from. So stop getting hurt over someone using a term, or having something from another culture, or doing something similar, they may know exactly what they’re doing. So a bit of advice, ask questions or shut up, and stop being a bunch of whiny brats who get hurt over everything. There are worse things in this world, like child abuse and molestation and animal abuse. 

#appropriation #cultural appropriation #personal rant #sorry for the rant #rant over #rant #be respectful #not disrespectful #learn the culture first #know what you're doing #stop whining #grow up #there are worse things

[apsbicepstraining]

Meet The Women Who Would Rather Have A Perfect Body Than Sex

Sex is an essential part of a caring rapport. When one or both parties decide that they no longer wishes to get wise on, such relationships can often come apart. In report, virility is quoted as the weigh length 1 reasons for long-term couples break up.

Whilst it is normal to go through dry incantations, most pairs are willing to throw in a little bit additional endeavor in the bedroom to get happens steamy again. Even though it’s inevitable that they will have less sexuality as such relationships goes on, it shouldn’t stop entirely. Appearances are more important than ever in 2017, and several beings go to extreme sections in order is still in peak physical representation. Nonetheless, it is about to change that there are a number of parties out there who are now relinquishing adultery for the perfect torso. Logic might prescribe that the fitter “you think youre”, the more masculinity you will have, but the University of North Carolina has been demonstrated that extreme hire governments can kill a person’s sex drive. What’s more is the fact that it happens practically instantaneously. For obvious rationales, expending too much age at the gym reason beings to become too tired to get frisky in the bedroom. But situations of extreme work authority likewise ground an under-functioning pituitary gland, which translates into low levels of testosterone and estrogen. Women, including with regard to, are susceptible to the side effects of applying too much. We required a certain period of being flab for our reproduction systems to function. Without it, we’re unable to have children, and this leads to the absence of a sex drive. Four female fitness maniacs lately opened up about how the gym has affected their lust lives, and their rebuttals are offending to say the least. After reading about its own experience, you’ll be forgiving yourself for having that additional cheat daytime … Twenty-five year old-fashioned Nikki Harvey demonstrates that whilst her hard core utilization government has improved her cheerfulnes and wellbeing, it is unable to lead to the end of her long-term relation with her 26 -year-old partner Jordan Burgess, a personal lecturer. “In the autumn of 2014, I was a length 16, liquor, smoking, living off junk food and generally fairly sorry, ” Harvey said. “One night I obligated Jordan and we swiftly became an item.” “He’s a rugby musician and he caught me exclaiming to myself in my bedroom when I couldn’t will be incorporated into my width 14 expends. He told me anyone can veering “peoples lives” around and encouraged me to get health and take up fitness and bodybuilding.” “I signed up for a 14 -week intensive pulpit, pushing me harder than I ever dreamed possible. I cherished every second. Every gram of folly heavines was stripped from my organization- better than any faddy diet.”

“I now prepares every morning at 5:30 am for two hours, then do an hour’s cardio every evening.” “It rightfully impacts on my concept. I haven’t been participating in a appointment darknes with Jordan since January, and my libido has vanished.” “Right now I have zero sex drive so Jordan and I haven’t well-developed fervor for 2 month. Jordan hates it, but he knows it’s not because I don’t fancy him. I enjoy my read so much better that two months ago I quit my job to do it full time.” “In April I came second in the UK Bodybuilding and Fitness Federation National Finals and is eligible for three international championships.” “My libido might be gone, but I seem most effective and am now so much better healthier. I plainly hopes that Jordan will stick by me without sex.” Unlike Harvey , nonetheless, the next interviewee has stopped having relation wholly and believes that her brand-new behavior is worthwhile … Gabriella Prior, who is just 22 years old, said that she has not had fornication in over 18 months. She last-place got it on around the time that she started her gruelling fitness regiman, and now she wishes being fit to having a good fornication life. “At the commencement of 2016, I did almost no exert. I went out boozing, experienced lazy weekends, had admirers and a health perversion life, ” she said. “I wasn’t depressed, but I felt like I didn’t have any hobbies.” “One morning, on a impulse, I decided to join the nearby House of Pain boxing gym. I was uneasy, but when I left I was so full of energy, I couldn’t just waiting do it again.” “Exercising is nows like anti-retroviral remedies to me. Within weeks. I was improving twice a span for two hours each age, five or six days per week. I still do that now.” “It’s 100 percentage endeavor civilize with sums, sparring and cardio. Boxing isn’t a sporting you do by halves. I is also difficult to tie my shoe laces after I have finished a hearing, let alone should be considered fornication. I used to have admirers, but they moved their course.” “Now I don’t have time to meet humen. I have recognized I don’t need a relationship or copulation to be happy. I cost freedom and fitness more than I theorized possible. My relation life now is a dim and remote memory.” “I hope that if I ever want to, I can reduce the strength of my training and then get my libido back. But I’m not inconvenienced now.” “I’ve had a couple of short-lived circumstances since I started improving but rapidly I’ve been ceased since they are ideology I was carrying, as I did not want to have sex all the time.” “I have been crowned Miss Fitness Inspiration UK, which entails more to me than any period of sex.” It’s no secret that some people have far higher sex drives than others. Prior to get fit, the next daughter interviewed was get down and soiled almost every night of the week. Now she’s not had fornication in months … The at commencing from a relationship is exciting, and it’s often when couples have the most immorality. Scrutinizing your partner’s party and getting to know their likes and furies is extremely important if such relationships got to go last-place. So it simply discerned sense that 25 -year-old Milly Mahoney’s partner, 26 -year-old Manny Tankov, knew prevented when her libido pitched after she reached the gym after previously having sexuality almost every night of the week. Her extreme dedication to fitness is now putting a real strain on their relationship. “I recollect understanding a friend’s washboard gut on vacation three years ago and thinking, ‘ I want that.’ I’d done a little bit of legislating before, but knew I had to punched the heaviness to get the body I missed. So I met a gym.” “Five or six days a week I detect as hard as I can for two hours, to the point of fatigue. When Manny comes on to me, relation is the latest region I pray as I’m subdued. I push away his hands. He’s visibly thwarted and takes a few minutes to calm down.” “Before I started improving I would have sex at the very least five days a week, which seems strange now. I’m likewise obsessive about my diet, weighing every last gram of protein or carbs- which means we do not absorb takeaways together or have appointment nighttimes in eateries. I’ve been with Manny for 18 months and he understands how much I affection working out- it was my physique that first allured him.” “I’m training for a bikini dissension, and we haven’t had copulation for 2 month. I guess it’s a little bit like giving up boozing for a few months – you recognise how much better “youre feeling”, then when it comes to the end of the month, you wonder if you actually implore a concoction at all anymore.” “I experience phenomenal and is so great. No quantity of perversion outdistances that.” Whilst sex is an important part of a relationship, it’s not the only thing which saves two beings together. You could have the best adultery of their own lives with being, but be unable to hold a respectable exchange with them … Stacey Boyce securely is therefore of the view that her join can stand the test of her extreme fitness sovereignty, although she is acknowledged that if often leaves her just tired to even snuggle with her traitor. Building as a powwow administrator in a city 50 miles from her home was essential for her dawns start at 5 am so she can reached the gym, and she often mentions herself going to sleep after midnight- which has resulted in there’s no time for infidelity. “I have been qualifying really hard down at the gym since 2014. While I affection it and wouldn’t change a rubbish, it gets harder each year. I’m in the gym most day of the week, and my diet is so closely detected, it has become totally addictive for me.” “I have been with my husband, Mark, for six years old, and thankfully he also works in the fitness construct. He understands the course I am, to a certain extent, but the strain on our relationship is massive.” “Before I started with all the gym specified, it was totally different between the two of us. We would have sex at the very least three times a week. Now, sometimes we don’t talk for days- and having copulation even once a few months is a push.” “My libido is non-existent. I know I’m asking a lot from my organisation by promoting massive onus and sometimes I can’t even nuzzle. Every single muscle in my being soreness, clearing copulation exclusively out of the question.” “I’m wearied all the time, and when I’m speaking hard, I have hard pecs instead of tit, so clearly don’t ordeal at all attractive or feminine.” “I get so concentrate on myself, perpetually checking my loading, calibrating constitution flab, weighing nutrient and training for endless hours. I know it’s mighty selfish to behave in this way. But that’s how I became a 2015 British UK Ultimate Physiques Bikini Champion.” “Of course, masculinity is natural and fascinating. But if you are in a fond and understanding occasion, the sin can wait.” Personally, I’d be willing to sacrifice the amount of season I spent in the gym to the purposes of a relationship. After all , no rapport is without accommodation, and abundance of people who reached the gym are still able to have health virility lives. What do you think of these women? Would you be willing to give up gluttony in the work of the perfect being?

The post Meet The Women Who Would Rather Have A Perfect Body Than Sex appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

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[apsbicepstraining]

Meet The Women Who Would Rather Have A Perfect Body Than Sex

Sex is an essential part of a caring rapport. When one or both parties decide that they no longer wishes to get wise on, such relationships can often come apart. In report, virility is quoted as the weigh length 1 reasons for long-term couples break up.

Whilst it is normal to go through dry incantations, most pairs are willing to throw in a little bit additional endeavor in the bedroom to get happens steamy again. Even though it’s inevitable that they will have less sexuality as such relationships goes on, it shouldn’t stop entirely. Appearances are more important than ever in 2017, and several beings go to extreme sections in order is still in peak physical representation. Nonetheless, it is about to change that there are a number of parties out there who are now relinquishing adultery for the perfect torso. Logic might prescribe that the fitter “you think youre”, the more masculinity you will have, but the University of North Carolina has been demonstrated that extreme hire governments can kill a person’s sex drive. What’s more is the fact that it happens practically instantaneously. For obvious rationales, expending too much age at the gym reason beings to become too tired to get frisky in the bedroom. But situations of extreme work authority likewise ground an under-functioning pituitary gland, which translates into low levels of testosterone and estrogen. Women, including with regard to, are susceptible to the side effects of applying too much. We required a certain period of being flab for our reproduction systems to function. Without it, we’re unable to have children, and this leads to the absence of a sex drive. Four female fitness maniacs lately opened up about how the gym has affected their lust lives, and their rebuttals are offending to say the least. After reading about its own experience, you’ll be forgiving yourself for having that additional cheat daytime … Twenty-five year old-fashioned Nikki Harvey demonstrates that whilst her hard core utilization government has improved her cheerfulnes and wellbeing, it is unable to lead to the end of her long-term relation with her 26 -year-old partner Jordan Burgess, a personal lecturer. “In the autumn of 2014, I was a length 16, liquor, smoking, living off junk food and generally fairly sorry, ” Harvey said. “One night I obligated Jordan and we swiftly became an item.” “He’s a rugby musician and he caught me exclaiming to myself in my bedroom when I couldn’t will be incorporated into my width 14 expends. He told me anyone can veering “peoples lives” around and encouraged me to get health and take up fitness and bodybuilding.” “I signed up for a 14 -week intensive pulpit, pushing me harder than I ever dreamed possible. I cherished every second. Every gram of folly heavines was stripped from my organization- better than any faddy diet.”

“I now prepares every morning at 5:30 am for two hours, then do an hour’s cardio every evening.” “It rightfully impacts on my concept. I haven’t been participating in a appointment darknes with Jordan since January, and my libido has vanished.” “Right now I have zero sex drive so Jordan and I haven’t well-developed fervor for 2 month. Jordan hates it, but he knows it’s not because I don’t fancy him. I enjoy my read so much better that two months ago I quit my job to do it full time.” “In April I came second in the UK Bodybuilding and Fitness Federation National Finals and is eligible for three international championships.” “My libido might be gone, but I seem most effective and am now so much better healthier. I plainly hopes that Jordan will stick by me without sex.” Unlike Harvey , nonetheless, the next interviewee has stopped having relation wholly and believes that her brand-new behavior is worthwhile … Gabriella Prior, who is just 22 years old, said that she has not had fornication in over 18 months. She last-place got it on around the time that she started her gruelling fitness regiman, and now she wishes being fit to having a good fornication life. “At the commencement of 2016, I did almost no exert. I went out boozing, experienced lazy weekends, had admirers and a health perversion life, ” she said. “I wasn’t depressed, but I felt like I didn’t have any hobbies.” “One morning, on a impulse, I decided to join the nearby House of Pain boxing gym. I was uneasy, but when I left I was so full of energy, I couldn’t just waiting do it again.” “Exercising is nows like anti-retroviral remedies to me. Within weeks. I was improving twice a span for two hours each age, five or six days per week. I still do that now.” “It’s 100 percentage endeavor civilize with sums, sparring and cardio. Boxing isn’t a sporting you do by halves. I is also difficult to tie my shoe laces after I have finished a hearing, let alone should be considered fornication. I used to have admirers, but they moved their course.” “Now I don’t have time to meet humen. I have recognized I don’t need a relationship or copulation to be happy. I cost freedom and fitness more than I theorized possible. My relation life now is a dim and remote memory.” “I hope that if I ever want to, I can reduce the strength of my training and then get my libido back. But I’m not inconvenienced now.” “I’ve had a couple of short-lived circumstances since I started improving but rapidly I’ve been ceased since they are ideology I was carrying, as I did not want to have sex all the time.” “I have been crowned Miss Fitness Inspiration UK, which entails more to me than any period of sex.” It’s no secret that some people have far higher sex drives than others. Prior to get fit, the next daughter interviewed was get down and soiled almost every night of the week. Now she’s not had fornication in months … The at commencing from a relationship is exciting, and it’s often when couples have the most immorality. Scrutinizing your partner’s party and getting to know their likes and furies is extremely important if such relationships got to go last-place. So it simply discerned sense that 25 -year-old Milly Mahoney’s partner, 26 -year-old Manny Tankov, knew prevented when her libido pitched after she reached the gym after previously having sexuality almost every night of the week. Her extreme dedication to fitness is now putting a real strain on their relationship. “I recollect understanding a friend’s washboard gut on vacation three years ago and thinking, ‘ I want that.’ I’d done a little bit of legislating before, but knew I had to punched the heaviness to get the body I missed. So I met a gym.” “Five or six days a week I detect as hard as I can for two hours, to the point of fatigue. When Manny comes on to me, relation is the latest region I pray as I’m subdued. I push away his hands. He’s visibly thwarted and takes a few minutes to calm down.” “Before I started improving I would have sex at the very least five days a week, which seems strange now. I’m likewise obsessive about my diet, weighing every last gram of protein or carbs- which means we do not absorb takeaways together or have appointment nighttimes in eateries. I’ve been with Manny for 18 months and he understands how much I affection working out- it was my physique that first allured him.” “I’m training for a bikini dissension, and we haven’t had copulation for 2 month. I guess it’s a little bit like giving up boozing for a few months – you recognise how much better “youre feeling”, then when it comes to the end of the month, you wonder if you actually implore a concoction at all anymore.” “I experience phenomenal and is so great. No quantity of perversion outdistances that.” Whilst sex is an important part of a relationship, it’s not the only thing which saves two beings together. You could have the best adultery of their own lives with being, but be unable to hold a respectable exchange with them … Stacey Boyce securely is therefore of the view that her join can stand the test of her extreme fitness sovereignty, although she is acknowledged that if often leaves her just tired to even snuggle with her traitor. Building as a powwow administrator in a city 50 miles from her home was essential for her dawns start at 5 am so she can reached the gym, and she often mentions herself going to sleep after midnight- which has resulted in there’s no time for infidelity. “I have been qualifying really hard down at the gym since 2014. While I affection it and wouldn’t change a rubbish, it gets harder each year. I’m in the gym most day of the week, and my diet is so closely detected, it has become totally addictive for me.” “I have been with my husband, Mark, for six years old, and thankfully he also works in the fitness construct. He understands the course I am, to a certain extent, but the strain on our relationship is massive.” “Before I started with all the gym specified, it was totally different between the two of us. We would have sex at the very least three times a week. Now, sometimes we don’t talk for days- and having copulation even once a few months is a push.” “My libido is non-existent. I know I’m asking a lot from my organisation by promoting massive onus and sometimes I can’t even nuzzle. Every single muscle in my being soreness, clearing copulation exclusively out of the question.” “I’m wearied all the time, and when I’m speaking hard, I have hard pecs instead of tit, so clearly don’t ordeal at all attractive or feminine.” “I get so concentrate on myself, perpetually checking my loading, calibrating constitution flab, weighing nutrient and training for endless hours. I know it’s mighty selfish to behave in this way. But that’s how I became a 2015 British UK Ultimate Physiques Bikini Champion.” “Of course, masculinity is natural and fascinating. But if you are in a fond and understanding occasion, the sin can wait.” Personally, I’d be willing to sacrifice the amount of season I spent in the gym to the purposes of a relationship. After all , no rapport is without accommodation, and abundance of people who reached the gym are still able to have health virility lives. What do you think of these women? Would you be willing to give up gluttony in the work of the perfect being?

The post Meet The Women Who Would Rather Have A Perfect Body Than Sex appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

from WordPress http://ift.tt/2z4FYhP via IFTTT

#IFTTT #WordPress