Spn fanfic prompt: Ghostfacers, Ed & Harry, discover that Sam & Dean are "dead serial killers" so they resolve to hunt the ghosts of the Winchesters.
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still thinking about aro!dean btw. thinking about that passage in john’s journal where he laments that at dean’s age, he had a wife and kids while dean is a hunter. and like. do you think john ever told him that? i imagine he did, set the scene, he’s drunk and dean has been pulling his boots off before bed since he was seven years old and now he’s in his twenties, still that boy taking care of his father, and john is apologizing for once. for how dean didn’t get the chance for what he had (except even now, all this mourning is framed around dean, but it’s not about dean, it’s about john, what he lost and can’t get back) and dean is listening to his father tell him he should’ve had a wife, should’ve had kids, should’ve had a house and the whole nine yards.
because more than the rest of the world telling dean what he should have, should want, his father crying to him that he ruined it all is gonna dig it’s claws into his head the most.
maybe john doesn’t even remember it in the morning. dean does.
so now that hangs over him, too. every feeling of ‘this isn’t quite right, isn’t what I’m comfortable with’ has to contend with the knowledge that his dad felt guilt he couldn’t have it. (compound that with sam’s request at the end of s5, and of course he ends up on lisa’s doorstep. it’s what they thought he wanted, so they told him to take it once he was free, but in doing so, culled his freedom down to a backyard and a shared bed with someone he barely knows and tries to love the way he should.)
and most importantly of all, obviously, I’m thinking about dean getting older. about how the weight of his father never really falls off, but he gets better at carrying it. and he can say to himself, he’s long past the point where he should’ve gotten all that stuff in order anyway. might as well work with what he’s got. (while what he’s got makes him happier than the life john imagined he stole ever could have.) new freedom that comes with aging out of expectation, in a way. a space to build his own life. and so one day, when dean the age john was when he wrote about it in his journal, he’s doesn’t feel like he missed out on anything at all.
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Btw if my Wynonna Earp spamming has inspired anyone to start watching (all 4 seasons are on Netflix, at least in the US), please be prepared for…let’s call it camp. Not sure if it counts as camp when I don’t think it was on purpose, but that’s what I’m calling it. The CGI is BAD. It gets a little better as the show goes on, but I’m warning you now. Sometimes the actors outside the main cast are……..less than stellar. (But the main cast is very good! Don’t worry!!) Sometimes the writing will unintentionally make you laugh, and there are some plot holes that never get resolved. BUT WITH ALL THAT BEING SAID: your payoff will be hilarity, kickass women who don’t fall into two stereotypical personalities, loving found family that will die for each other (and often make horrible deals with dark entities to save each other), and happy endings. It’s worth it!!!
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I think the whole structure of "Troll Romance" as a concept is probably the reason why so many folks who were intense Homestuck fans ended up being some flavor of LGBTQ or another - because the most intense fans really liked the whole Troll culture and there is a very clear mapping between a lot of queer concepts of identity and the fandom sanitized version of queer culture.
but ultimately it was really just a webcomic that started with some funny programming gags and then we all sunk cost fallacied ourselves into thinking it was good through the creator's overambitious phase, pretentious phase, and mostly only broke when it became clear how much the author hated what his art had become
honestly even without the particulars of andrew homestuck's descent into madness(?), i think the sunk cost fallacy can explain like 90% of long-term fandom participation tbh. just look at the people (queer people even!) who are still harry potter fans in year of our lord 2023.
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Felicia Day voice-acted for Queen Wealhtheow in a read-aloud of Maria Dahavana Headley's translation of Beowulf.
This is a painting of Wealhtheow from an illustrated edition of Beowulf... circa 1908
...and Charlie is a complete Ren Faire nerd who LARPs SPECIFICALLY as the queen of a viking/anglo-saxon-esque kingdom.
The amount of SHEER BRAINROT this gives me.
Is it just a straight past-lives situation at this point? Were they always fated to find each other again?
What's more fucked-up(complimentary)? That in their next lives, the major characters of Beowulf still found each other, and although they are still cursed, still monstrous, Wealhtheow is a friend and ally to Grendel and his Mother? That she doesn't know that she's living out her past life through LARPing and other fantasy, just as they're living out their past lives through a very real, inescapable and fatal curse?
Or that it was the same way the first time? We don't know much about Wealhtheow's early life. She was foreign-born, either married to Hrothgar* in a political union or, depending on who you believe, given to him as a slave as part of a peace treaty (I'm not sure if people in that culture/time would have even considered these to be separate concepts). We don't know anything about where Grendel and his Mother were prior to the events of Beowulf, either, except that Grendel's Mother seems to have ruled here Mere (swamp) for a ~100 years, but also that the pair had wandered the wilderness and outer edges of society together since time immemorial.
Its not impossible that Grendel and his Mother, in their travels, could have saved the life of a foreign princess- become her friend, or her ally.
There are some theories that Wealhtheow may have been from what is now England. If we choose to mix folklore with utter disregard for academia or timestream, that puts her in the place (the culture of the Britons) and time (~500s a.d.) that King Arthur was said to have lived in**. Going by Arthuriana, their relationship with Mysterious, Sword-Bearing Water Women was MUCH friendlier than the Scandinavian cultures featured in Beowulf.
*will need to make a whole other post abt that guy
**spn aside, the Arthur/Beowulf thing is FASCINATING and I need to write something with it at some point
They could have been friends. Its not impossible. Their story could have begun the same as it did in spn...
It ended differently the first time (THE FIRST TIME. SPN WASNT THE FIRST TIME. FUCK!!!!). Still in tragedy, just a different kind, a slower kind. Did Grendel or his Mother see Wealhtheow at Heorot after she was married/given/captured? Did Wealhtheow see them? Did they speak, or part in silence, knowing that they were now on opposite sides of an impassable boundary?
Did Wealhtheow hold back tears as she saw Grendel's arm, and later his head, and learned what had happened to his Mother?
Did she remember her friends?
.....FUCKKKKKKK
Charlie has almost definitely read Beowulf, but I don't know if Sam & Dean ever told her (any version of her) about the Mark of Cain situation. Did she recognize them in the text? Did she recognize herself?
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