#sorry this was a ramble and a half but yeah idk how much thought the fandom has put into it

[glowinggreeneyes-e]

do you ever think about what Havers felt when being promoted to Captain?

like there was a significant amount of time where that was his rank, his title, his authority; people referred to him as ‘Captain’; and he had to sit with the fact he was called by the name of the man he loved, hundreds or thousands of miles away, with the only peace of mind being that his Captain was safe.

did he flinch every time someone called ‘Captain Havers’ or did it bring him some comfort, like the taking of a last name in marriage? did he suppress a smile at memory of his Captain’s name on his tongue? did it feel like belonging? or did the War all blur into one, eventually forgetting how much comfort and love the word once brought?

and when he was promoted to Major, of course, of course, there was the pride and responsibility of serving, leading men, life-and-death decisions, and strategising on saving lives.

but was there a loss at the one thing connecting him back home to his Captain? a renewed guilt for leaving and then surpassing his beloved? did he wonder what James was up to, at home, as a man far below his equal in the eyes of society and the Army?

were they ever going to be seen as equal to each other or, indeed, to other men?

#something something metaphors for homosexuality and autism something something parallels and love something #sorry this was a ramble and a half but yeah idk how much thought the fandom has put into it #I could be rehashing old meta #pls add to this as well if I’ve forgotten shit #meta #bbc ghosts #capvers #caphavers #havers #captain #my post #if they were allowed to love they would’ve been equal in each others eyes and that’s all that mattered

[egberts]

girls wake up there's a new worm bike playlist in progress

alana said the new one is way more funky, I've noticed a lot of punk bands are piggy dippin in a funk/punk sound more than a pop/punk sound and honestly? I'm so obsessed.

#its only like half done but ive already had it on repeat for 2 months #truly a I love this song! oh yeah i added it ass playlist #ever since going public with the worm bikes i am more conscious of how incohesive these playlists are #i can have songs bordering on e boy trap music noise alongside what is basically a pop song alongside screamo #but the point was never to have a cohesive sound or vibe. it was to collect new music in one place #and it does that effectively for me even if not everyone who seeks them out has the same taste #also a seperate thought to make these tags extra long: some of them ARE more cohesive and that's the funny part #you can tell my moods of the time or what i was seeking in song. one of them is full of songs about cutting off abusive parents and #simultaneously songs about being happy having a good time healing and starting over #like in a convoluted way that is cohesive and poetic #idk just weird to look back and be able to identify periods of my life with the music i collected now that theres so much of it #wish i could hard copy it but some of these songs are so obscure i feel like it's unrealistic #but i do want to have copies of my VIP list #okay sorry for the long ass rambling tags byyyyeeee

[sapsolais]

i love nimona

#i'm going 2 ramble here in the tags ok. okay? ok #god. look. i went into this movie thinking 'yeah yeah obv trans allegory woohoo' thinkin that's great! but #idk. i thought it would be something that could be brushed aside or sanitized easily maybe. y'know? like passed off as another kids movie #and i thought maybe other trans folks could relate 2 the movie and i was like ok that's cool let's watch it and. it was just #that one scene. #everyone talked abt how they cried and how it really Hit and i didn't get it until then #at the statue #i cried. a lot. and i never do that w media and i don't mean that to be edgy or whatever kssdfkjg but just #oh fuck #they Get It #that part. it reached into my soul and grabbed that core part of me and Tugged. #it Hurt and i felt it. the exhaustion. ready to give up. the cry nimona let out. i cried because i got it. and then i cried harder because #i'd give anything for a ballister in my life #my thoughts are 'they got us in the second half ngl' basically KSDJHFKSJDHFKSD #first half of the movie? great! but second half? oh. oh it punches u in the face over and over and gets better and better #it's so. SO good. god. i don't know when everything clicked 4 me i don't think it was a singular moment but. man. oh man #i need to rewatch that immediately #instantly a favorite. shit #it's so unapologetically nimona. it's so Itself and it's not sorry and i love it and it feels so special and i'm holding it so close #there's 2 much to gush about in these tags there's not enough space but just know. i am Insane about this #sap says #god. fuck

[lovebugism]

hi bug!! for your shy!reader requests, idk if you’re going smutty w them but if you ARE: I love the concept of reader being generally pretty quiet, which extends to r’s sex life bc they’ve never thought to b otherwise… enter Hawkins’ own loudmouth DM who takes it upon himself to coax every noise out of reader that he can 💖🫡

ty for requesting! here's my first attempt at smut on here since 2023 :D — eddie teaches his quiet gf how to be louder in the bedroom (shy!fem!r, smut 18+)

Eddie’s face appears from beneath the covers — pale cheeks flushed, chestnut hair wild. He’s still got his ringed fingers wrapped ‘round your thighs, clutching you with the same intensity he’d had when his face was shoved between them. 

He blinks at you with chocolate eyes and drags his tongue across his lip. His pink mouth is softly swollen with use and glittering with your honey. “Is this okay?” he slurs between labored pants.

You lift your swimmy head from the pillow and peer at him through the valley of your breasts, rising and falling with each deep breath. You nod until the words catch up to you. “Yeah. Yeah, it’s— it’s good,” you answer breathlessly, though you don’t think that describes the half of it.

There aren’t enough words in the English language you could string together to describe how he makes you feel. How good he is with his tongue. How you’re throbbing clit still pounds like a heartbeat for more of him.

“Okay. Good,” he huffs with a lazy nod. 

His fingers fidget around your thighs when he shifts on the mattress, wincing slightly when his sensitive cock ruts against it. “I just… I wanted to make sure, you know? ‘Cause you weren’t… You weren’t really… Saying anything.”

He forces out a chuckle to keep the honeyed mood light while horror floods your features. Your eyes soften around the edges with worry. “What was I… What was I supposed to say?” you squeak.

“Nothing!” he answers quickly, eyes going wide when he senses your panic. “It’s just… Most— Most people moan when they feel good and stuff…” His lip quirks in a lopsided smile before a laugh sputters from them. “I mean, you’ve heard me. I’m fucking loud.”

He is. He’s more than loud, actually — full of gruff moans, pretty whimpers, and neverending praise. He never leaves you with an ounce of worry when you’re with him ‘cause he’s constantly rambling about how good you feel.

“Fuck, baby, that’s good— Oh, shit,” he babbled while he fucked your mouth, some minutes ago now. He whimpered after, high-pitched and faraway.“Gonna make me cum— so fucking hard— in your pretty little throat. Fuck, angel. Fuck—”

You writhe on the mattress, feeling suddenly uncomfortable in your own skin. 

You become acutely hyperaware of how bare you are below him, with his face mere inches from your glistening pussy and his chocolate eyes swimming with warmth. You feel more naked than you already are. Totally fucking see-through.

“Sorry,” you murmur sheepishly. “I just… I guess, I’m just quiet. I don’t know.”

Eddie smiles like he isn’t wearing your slick all over his chin. “That’s okay,” he assures with an innocuous twinkle in his eye. “But you don’t have to be. You know that, right?”

You blink at him until you realize the question isn’t rhetorical. 

His smile falls into a mischievous smirk when you nod. 

“Be as loud as you want for me, yeah? Make all the noise you want…”

—————

He’s a menace.

Eddie Munson is a total fucking menace.

He doesn’t eat your pussy like it’s the last thing he’ll ever do. No, he takes his good and well time with you — like he plans on doing this, and only this, for the rest of his life. 

Your inner thighs are slick with saliva. His spit drips down your ass, along with your honey, as his tongue laps mercilessly at your cunt. Slowly, gently, agonizingly. It’s like he can’t help but be so sloppy. Like he can’t help but drool all over your pussy ‘cause he loves it so damn much.

“Eddie, please,” you whine through heavy pants, clammy hands cradling your knees to keep them spread for him. “I wanna cum, Eddie. Please, I wanna cum.”

If he’s doing all this to get you talking, well, it’s fucking working.

His mouth smacks when it parts from your sensitive clit. The delicate button is as swollen as his lips are now. His pretty face is utterly blissed out — mouth rosy, eyes lidded, cheeks flushed. Like he’s found heaven in your pussy.

“Shit,” he huffs with a crooked smile, still a bit breathless. “You taste too good… Got me all distracted… Wasn’t tryin’ to tease you, babe, I swear.”

He pulls back the sticky hood of your cunt with a ringed hand. You keen when his thumb rolls over your throbbing clit. “Fuck, Eds,” you gasp — back arched, head thrown back.

“Need it that bad, huh?” He chuckles quietly when your hips buck into his hand, desperate for more. 

“Please, Eds,” you beg with your eyes squeezed shut. Tears burn in the very corners of them, stinging like you might cry at how good he’s making you feel. At how badly you want him to make you cum.

Spit dribbles from his pursed mouth onto your already slick pussy. He rubs it in with guitar string-calloused fingers, and your toes curl into the sheets. “Wanna cum?” he slurs, blinking slowly at your trembling form with pretty button eyes. “Wanna cream on my tongue?”

You whine at the vulgarity of his words — and at the lightning strike that rushes down your spine when his merciless fingers graze your pulsing clit. Swallowing down a sob, you nod rapidly against the pillow.

Eddie kisses your pussy like he would your mouth. Your honey clings to him when he pulls away, smirking up at you with glittering lips. “Then keep talking for me, yeah?”

#published by bug #eddie munson x reader #stranger things x reader #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #stranger things imagine #eddie munson imagine #stranger things fanfic #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things fic #stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fic #st drabbles #eddie spaghetti drabble

[kurosstuff]

Can I just say- I 100% believe exorcists? Are "tools" in a way-

Also note may not make to much sense since I'm like half asleep writing this

Gonna be rambling♡ sorry

I mean- their fighting machines. Killing machines. Doesn't matter if their angels are not. We KNOW winners and angels in general are the passive types. The pure types. But like everything their needs to be a guard in place. Protectors of that very innocence.

To preserve that naive innocent pure beings. The winners brought forgiven of the "small" sins they did in the mortal realm. Considering it a .. easy mistake. Everyone makes mistakes right?

But not angels.

At least that's what their told. That's what excorists in particular are told. They themself commit a sin. Murder- slaughtering in such a cruel inhumane way for beings so pure- an impression of sorts.

I always wondered. How come they have masks resembling demons? What if its to hide behind it. Hide the sins their doing? I mean. Angels can not sin. Excorsists are angels- heaven born(as I believe they'd be) made to be the ones to slaughter. To commit horrible cruel things.

What if its just to show what their created to be similar too? As a mockery of sorts?

Like their committing a sin. Yet- their still pure? Like showing the complete opposite of them while wearing the mask that looked like demons.

We see vaggie always on edge(rightfully so) and the only one she isn't? Chsrlie(ofc) but ehat if that's all they all knew

Violence. Being cruel. The ones who speak and we see most of- vaggie and lute? Are both rude and their automatic thought most times is violence. To handle matters with fists(or whatever) instead of speaking it our most cases.

Like when vaggie fell? Lute was cruel. Ripped her apart with no remorse. But wouldn't that also make her in trouble too? In a logical sense. Like. She was cruel to a THEN angel before she fell. Wouldn't that have been a sin as well?

Or is rules different for the beings made to be neither pure or sinful. Is that why their allowed in heaven? Allowed to stay above with the winners?

Their teacher Adam a crude rude man. The first man- who thinks of himself most cases- ego to big but hiding behind that is a hurt man. Who lost both his wives to the same man. The very same man who he had a whole army of his daughters to kill the sinners. As if a act a revenge.

And as we have seen glimpses of- kinda? Idk angels are impressionable like that of a toddler mimicking and forming themself to fit thst of a parent or a figure above tjat they see all the time.

So the excorsists are filled with hate. Burning hate - rage filled against the sinners below. Demons in general. Which in hindsight is odd.

Why would they bother be mad. Be pissed. Be filled with such a hateful thing when their in a place opposite of thst? In a stress free place. Adam even said it himself they don't HAVE to worry for stress(I forgot the exact thing he said but yeah-)

So. Their tools. Made to be unfeeling other then hate for the beings that made them have a purpose. To kill.

Idk if any of thos made sense it's 3 am I'm half a asleep and I let my mind wander once again♡♡

#hazbin hotel #hazbin lute #hazbin hotel lute #hazbin hotel exorcists #hazbin vaggie #hazbin hotel vaggie #hazbin hotel heaven #hazbin hotel headcanon

[sakasakiii]

hi!!! how long does an average panel of one of your comics take??

i love your work so much!! it got me into silmblr hehe

HI NONNIE!!! thank u sooooso much for checking in and for ur lovely ask! it means a lot to hear that my silly ol scribbles were what introduced u to the glorious landscape that is the tolkien fandom! on tumblr no less!! i hope you stay a real long time, and have a blast while you're at it 💖💖

now onto your question! that's some good food for thought uhhhh i can try to estimate?? its been a while but i shld have some rough ideas abt each that i can share! the time frame each comic/panel takes is highly dependent on WHAT kind of comic it is. i hv two kinds of comics I usually do: 1) full-length, and 2) goofy/4koma.

i have a few full-length comics laying about in my archive, but my most recent one/best example is Ghosts which was around uh.... 7 pages excluding the bonus panels! in terms of the process, i usually divide it into 5 stages:

Drafting: this is either the fastest stage OR the slowest depending entirely whether i know what im doing LMAO,, if i have a set idea for what i want to happen, i might get drafts done in a few hours, but if i flounder, it can take a few days 🤔

Lineart: relatively simple enough once i hv the draft down, so id say anything ranging from an hour to half a day if theres nothing else going on irl

Block colouring (main actors): there are DEFINITELY easier and more professional ways to do this with mass-selection and the lasso fill/bucket tool, but idk how to do that on SAI (my art program) so i colour everything by hand HAHA which makes the process longer.... half a day to a day?

Shading: THE WORST!!! definintely my least favourite bc i find it tedious due to all the details/prettification of elves that i am legally obliged to pour into this stage 😭😭 as a result, it can take days!!!

Background + Lighting + Final Rendering: similar to the previous stage haha it just depends on how much effort i wanna put into the final product looking nice. roughly a few days? it kind of meshes with stage 4 anyways haha

just for fun, i hope this process gif for page 6 can illustrate that 👇

these are just rough estimates, bc all in all, the time it takes so finish a page is really dependent on how free I am hahaha. Also, I usually work on full-length comics like Ghost which have more than one page all at once, which means I drafted all 7 pages at once, then did the lineart for all 7 pages at once, coloured at once, shaded rendered bla bla bla 😚 iirc, i think it took me 11 days in total to finish Ghosts before the end of June last year!

For goofy/4-koma, its usually just one page with less detailed/more cartoonish/chibi character styles so it takes a day or two days at most! again, it all boils down to how free i am hehe

YEAH SORRY THIS ENDED UP BEING AN INFO DUMP but thank you so much again for asking and letting me ramble! <3 i ended up having a lot of fun looking back on my drafts n thinking back on my processes.... theres defininitely room for improvement, but thats another worry for another day heheh 😎

#rin replies #anon asks #silmarillion #yeah sorry again this turned into a yap fest 💃💃 #i never knew all those wips wld come in handy but maybe its a good thing i like sending myself things hehe #cannot reiterate enough how much i HATE colouring :(((( #thank you again for ur kind message nonnie <33 #silm #silm comic #wip #behind the scenes stuff

[gods-favorite-autistic]

Grease ROTPL finale spoilers below

I have thoughts and questions

Jumping for fucking joy when Nancy slapped Mr Daniels and said “she is a child” LIKE YES QUEEN

Nancy this episode slayed so much like from assaulting predators to supporting the gays in the span of less than an hour you go girl

Speaking of supporting the gays the coming out scene was so amazing and it Hurt

Frenchie and Betty Rizzo were so great this episode and the siblings energy with Jane and Gil was unmatched

Watching Gil with another girl hurt but like I get it so much

If they do get another season I am excited to see how the whole Pink Ladies date T-Birds thing comes around cause like rn Hazel and Cynthia are both dating non T-Birds (not to mention Hazel’s dating a soc)

I think we can all agree on one thing and it’s that the girl from Lydia’s summer scout or whatever is gonna catch these hands

Jane Nancy and Cynthia were so real in the first song like yeah get his ass

Susan I was rooting for you we were all rooting for you

Buddy finally made the right choice and now he’s a fucking homeless high school dropout-

Somebody give this poor boy a break

The Zuko name drop at the end fucking floored me

I need to know what happened between Zuko (I’m assuming Danny’s older brother?) and Jane to make her this mad

Also btw the whole writing it down thing for the coming out scene was cute and all but I would really like to know what Nancy wrote on the paper

Also something Nancy said in that scene caught my eye so imma just rant for a bit

In the part where Nancy’s trying to guess what’s making Cynthia upset she’s says something like “did you talk to your mom?” Which brings up two questions for me

What happened with Cynthia’s mom that would make Cynthia upset if they talked (from what we see of the scenes at Cynthia’s place it seems like she’s doesn’t live with them but she’s obviously not dead so something happened there$

How does Nancy know about whatever happened between Cynthia and her mom (basically like did she hear it through town gossip, is it like common knowledge for the town, or did Cynthia tell her in which case I wanna see that scene)

Also another thing that stood out to me (because she is my favorite character) was that in the church Cynthia kept doing the like 🙏 peace be with you thing and yeah it could’ve just been her being nervous and stuff but she also does the like touch cross thing (idk what it’s called) when Jane is talking to Mr. Daniels as almost like a subconscious thing so I’m wondering if that’s possibly a thing or if I’m just grasping at straws for a Cynthia backstory

I’m really hoping if we get a season two that they flesh out Olivia Nancy and Cynthia’s backstories cuz like we know Jane’s pretty much and we get little snippets of the other three but nothing really solid

Idk kinda like the T-Birds episode except with the girls

Anyways sorry for rambling (and spending like half the time talking about Cynthia) but yeah that’s it

#tw cursing #cw cursing #rise of the pink ladies #nancy rotpl #olivia rotpl #rotpl spoilers #lydia rotpl #hazel rotpl #cynthia rotpl #rotpl #jane facciano #cynthia zdunowski #olivia valdovinos #nancy nakagawa #tw all caps #cw all caps #grease: rise of the pink ladies #grease rotpl

[riddlerosehearts]

Okay now EYE must ask you - how are you liking BG3??? How far are you?? Tell me about your Tav!!!! (Please and thank you <3)

hi!! 💖 i only started the game a few days ago and it was an impulse decision i made after having previously told a friend of mine that i definitely wanted to play it but that it'd probably take me a while to get around to it (and, because i thought i wouldn't play anytime soon i hadn't really been trying to avoid spoilers). but, i have the PC version and while it generally runs just fine, my computer is kind of slow and the game is so big that it took hours to download and install. so i kind of went ahead and started to come up with a whole character idea during that time LOL. sorry if my explanations of things get a bit too rambly/disorganized. i'm actually not very far in the game at all yet, i've been spending a ton of time doing stuff in the druids grove and i'm supposed to go find halsin but i haven't even gotten karlach in my party yet! i've recruited all the main companions except for her but i am excited to meet her. gonna put the rest of this under a cut for length.

my only background with DND is that i listened to the first campaign of the adventure zone and i've watched the legends of vox machina show. i also have a friend who's super into her own DND campaign and another friend who's told me a lot about dimension 20, specifically fantasy high--and i've considered trying it out for her but haven't gotten around to it yet! i think she actually told me the same thing about the episode lengths making it easier to get into than critical role, because i had tried critical role and it was just so long that i couldn't stick with it. but, yeah, i've also looked at the forgotten realms wiki a bit but i've never actually played DND. i have played skyrim and final fantasy 14 and some other similar RPGs with customizable blank-slate protagonists, and in those types of games i always have to make OCs to roleplay as--usually i'll think up a basic idea to start with and then flesh the character out as i get into the game. they're never really self-inserts but i do often project onto them a little.

so, in games like these my first character is usually an elf that specializes in elemental/destructive magic. idk why, that's just what i've always liked. in ff14 i started out as a black mage without knowing it was the hardest class to play LMAO. soooo i went into this planning to create a high elf sorcerer, but as i started writing out ideas and thinking about what to do, i ended up creating a half-high elf bard. they're transmasc/nonbinary and in my head they use he/they pronouns, but i picked the nb option in the character creator and that causes npcs to actually use they/them in dialogue which i think is so cool. i love that the character creator is so inclusive in regards to gender.

anyway, i named them elenion, which is something i took from the lord of the rings universe because i'm a huge nerd. in LOTR it's an elvish word that basically means "of the stars". here's a couple screenshots i took when i first started. let's just ignore the fact that this hairstyle clips into elf ears (and also that the face preset is from a mod i downloaded).

i didn't really give him a tragic backstory or even the most interesting story haha--i'm wanting to do something bigger and angstier with another character on a second playthrough when i'm more familiar with the lore and world of the game. and i'll probably also end up changing or expanding on some things about this character later, but for now i just kind of made a normal guy with normal problems. i had this idea that his father, a human who attracted the attention of a beautiful elf woman, was also a bard and was a very successful musician in his youth. so elenion has always shared his father's passion and dreamed of being like him, being able to effortlessly tell incredible tales and inspire crowds of people through song, but no matter how much he studies and practices he never feels good enough. if he seems confident it's usually just because he's gotten really good at faking it. he's also pretty reserved and often avoids having to talk about himself by asking a lot of questions. see, i kind of wanted to specifically find a way to not roleplay the usual sort of loud, flirty, goofy bard, lol. not that i dislike those kinds of characters or anything though!

however, bards are meant to be super charismatic, witty, and persuasive and of course the game strongly encourages that with the dialogue options and skill bonuses you get. so my way of explaining this is to have elenion be a bit like raine from the owl house, in that they may be shy, but they're very firm in their ideals and are no pushover when it comes to protecting themself or their allies. they're clever and have a snarky side to them, and they're genuinely friendly and caring in a way that gives them a sense of quiet charisma. which reminds me that one of the spells i gave them at the start was sleep, and it's made me imagine that when they were a kid they tried calming a crying baby by playing a lullaby on their lute and accidentally ended up casting their first spell.

oh, and, i also wasn't really sure at first where in the world i wanted elenion to come from but i decided on something pretty quickly after getting multiple of those dialogue options suggesting that the protagonist is baldurian! i pictured them growing up in a somewhat small town with their family but moving to baldur's gate as an adult, hoping that if they left the comfort of their home and started to journey out into the world a little they'd eventually find their spark and become the bard they wanted to be. unfortunately they've had little luck so far because even after all this time they can't see that maybe their whole fixation on trying to be just like their father and achieve the exact same kind of success that he had is holding them back. the fact that their father died the year after they moved away hasn't helped either. and now, in the middle of traveling to a historical site that they'd wanted to see in person and use as inspiration for a song, they've been abducted by mindflayers and are struggling with the massive upheaval that this has brought into their relatively mundane life.

so. yeah. my tav for this first playthrough may not be the most unique or exciting character but i like him! i like figuring out what kind of choices he'll make and thinking up new ideas for what he likes and how he sees the world. also, i find it funny how in your reply to my ask you said you thought you'd be into gale but then you fell for astarion--because i thought that i'd be all over the edgy, brooding, snarky vampire man, but it turns out gale is so charming and funny that i'm probably going to romance him first. i'm also pretty intrigued by shadowheart and wyll but i'm so early in the game that i can't even say who i think my overall favorite companion will be because they all seem so interesting!! even karlach despite the fact that i haven't actually met her yet, i've seen a bunch of cool gifsets of her and my brother told me he's been romancing her on his playthrough. i really need to go find her soon.

i'm sure you can tell from everything i wrote here that i am definitely enjoying the game LOL. i can already tell that there's just so many different things to do and see, that i will both need and want to do a lot of different playthroughs and that it's going to be something that sticks with me. nothing wrong with using guides and walkthroughs btw! i do it too because i'm worried about missing too many things and have the world's worst sense of direction even with a minimap. honestly i probably need to look up some guides for certain mechanics that i don't feel like i've really figured out yet. there's a sarcophagus trap in the ruins early in the game that got me SO stuck and got my whole party wiped and then i looked up a video and found out you could turn off the whole trap system by pushing a switch... i felt so stupid askjdfgf.

anyway, i think this got to be way too long of a reply so i will stop here! but if you ever wanna tell me more about your tav or anything definitely feel free to and i hope you're having an awesome day!

#asks #nerdalmighty #i hope all of this actually makes some kind of sense lol #i'm really not a great writer but i just think coming up with OCs with fleshed out personalities #and trying to get into their heads makes games like this more fun #and also ty for the ask!! 💖 #baldur's gate 3

[unclassedguy]

The Details of Genderbend Naoya Au:

*yap incoming*

Just a collection of my thought process and ramblings about this collection of drawings to scratch the itch in my brain.

General ramblings:

This is not a fleshed out au. There isn't much of a storyline and I don't exactly know if I will ever make one.

The au doesn't follow the jjk canon apart from some general things like Toji leaving Megumi and Tsumiki etc.

The ‘story’ follows Naoya Zenin after an accident that should have killed him instead leaves him unscathed. That is, until he wakes up the next day with a girl's body, a kogane companion, and the ability to see strange creatures (cursed spirits) and people who should have been long dead.

Bro is basically now part of a culling game-esque event involving people who were saved from death like him, those who died long ago and were resurrected, and creatures that should have never entered the living realm. Some people such as him with bad karma for their actions, are given certain handicaps and/or punishments when they're brought back from death. Hence girl-Naoya.

But, by destroying the souls of beings with even more bad karma than you, you can gain points that will give you access to abilities (cursed techniques) or lessen your own punishment or handicap.

The Kogane function the same here as they do in canon.

Basically, this is me drawing fem Naoya with a bunch of extra steps 💀

Drawing one:

A lot of the ‘story’ of this au just happened randomly as I was doodling, Kenjaku and Takaba running Naoya over being part of that.

I wanted to draw Naoya reacting to him becoming a girl for the shits and giggle, yk, the sillies

And before I knew it I had Naoya getting run over by a truck 💀

The reason Takaba is the driver is because of that one scene in Kenjaku vs Takaba, Kenjaku is in the passenger's seat just because.

There is no reason as to what they're singing besides me wanting them to have been distracted by something goofy 

You might have noticed Naoya is holding something. Idk what it is though 

Its like….a wand…a club…? It's based off his first form as a cursed spirit, the one where he looks like a worm

Yes, his shirt does indeed say “why women deserve less”. It's based on that one fanart of him reading a book with the same title. 

Drawing two:

The first thing I thought of when I imagined Naoya going on a ‘quest’ to become a man again was that ant carrying a bindle.

(It gives pathetic energy, which i enjoy giving my Naoya drawings)

This is actually my first time drawing Hana, I actually like drawing her

I'm so sorry to people who like Nobara and Maki, I can't draw them that well 😭😭😭

I'm thinking Hana/Angel are trying to fix whatever is going on with the souls of the deceased/players, and are thus gathering allies (though they also want to defeat a certain king of curses even in this au as well 👀)

Naoya ends up joining her, Maki, and Nobara as allies (no one is happy about this)

They will put him in his place, especially Maki.

(I wonder what would happen if he met Yuki…)

Naoya and Hana is a combination I didn't think I'd ever draw interacting tbh 💀

But for some reason that's what ended up happening

Other thoughts:

It's so cute how the kogane have different designs sometimes based on who they belong to. It reminds me of the crows in kny.

I wonder if they're meant to represent something about each player???

For example, the one we see with Naoya when we're first introduced to his curse form has a skull like face, which we later see on Naoya's second curse form.

His looks so crusty and I love it

I rlly wanted it to be his companion in this au

Honestly, I was thinking Naoya upon turning into a girl would try everything he could to make himself look more traditionally masculine

But I still wanted to draw him in a skirt, you know, because

So…uh…yeah 👍

His ass doesn't even want to be a woman, but let's be fr, he be styling his hair in the mirror or some shit thinking things like ‘if only every woman paid half as much attention to how she holds herself as me!’ Thinking he's giving everyone a good example or something 💀

Stfu Naoya 

I have a third addition to this collection of drawings in the works. It'll probably be up in a few days, depending on if I have time to work on it or not. This will probably be the last piece of this au for a while.

Part 1 , Part 2 Edit: Part 3

#naoya zenin #naoya #jjk naoya #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk au #genderbend

[lotusmi]

Hi!! I’ll send u an ask them if that’s what u prefer. I know these things have been asked and said already and every blog on tumblr and beyond has replied to messages like this but I would appreciate your advice.

I won’t give a backstory but take my word that I’ve been part of this community for years, my entire adolescent life. I’ve not put my 100% into anything growing up because of the whole idea that “it’ll change” or “I’ll shift to my DR any day now” I haven’t even studied for my finals and my first is in a couple weeks or so. Recently I’ve been into Edward art and his teachings on YouTube. I’ve read Neville before but Edward I just prefer to read and listen to because I find his voice relaxing and idk I just prefer it. But I am struggling. Idk how to apply the law. My goal is to enter the void, or shift overnight or whatever and just wake up in my ideal reality with everything laid out and I know it’s possible but idk how to get there. I know the second i apply Edwards/Neville’s teachings and work it’ll happen instantly but idk how. Affirming doesn’t do much for me, I could affirm 10k times a day and it won’t do anything. I could believe that today is the day and flip intrusive thoughts that it isn’t and still not get anywhere. I just don’t understand, I feel super lost and confused about all of this and even when I try to start from the beginning I just can’t. I know it’s possible but I just don’t know what to do. I feel as tho even if I know it’s mine and ik it exists because imagination is reality, there’s still the other half that’s like “I want it so badly.” I think what makes it worse is me being scared, scared of failing exams or whatever and facing the consequences in the 3D. Ugh I feel like a mess!!

I try to have a routine which is; think of my dream life > think like my ideal self would (memories mainly) > just live like it’s real. It’s hard to stay in that state tho so…idk im rambling sorry. I just don’t know how to move forward and any guidance will help. Idk if there’s something I specifically need to read or hear or do but yeah

Hi angel, I would recommend you reading this success stor from a person who were procrastinating for 4 years! And also this one, from one anon of mine, who manifested waking up in Dubai, she revised all her life!

The thing is, if you want something, assume and persist, persist in being, knowing it is done, decide to do it for yourself, and then do it. You are in control, you are God, so if you really want, assume you have it and persist in being without thinking so much about time, because it will be reflected, it has to be refleted. So don't give up!

[maranull]

OMG!!!!A FELLOW MARIKA LOVER!!!!!

I needed someone to ramble about Marika for so long. Bruh she's like one of the best female characters I've seen in a while

But when I first got into the fandom, it's like people are VERY bad towards Marika and what they said about her is how she's *insert a crazy amount of slurs offensive towards a woman*

She's very prominent to the story and they thought she was responsible for everything, stay with me on this. I understand she's responsible MAJORLY, but not ENTIRELY

They have a whole cast of characters and they decided to hate on one woman for idk all the bad things? It's like blaming the rock because someone throws it at you

Hello, hello!

She is! I didn't like her that much at first, but then I looked a bit more into her lore and later actions and she got me. Very complex and honestly just a really fun character to think about! And write! Oh, I love writing her.

I think I missed the blatant hate, but it doesn't surprise me. Those folks are just an insta block for me anyway, so even if I saw them, I have forgotten them :P. I did got the one dimensional takes on her though, but those are generally chill or used to make jokes.

She is basically fully responsible for like 70-80% of the story before the Shattering, but yeah, after (and sometime before) it you have so many other forces making plays while she's straight up crucified.

But I do get the hate, tbh? What I don't get is why folks needed/need to vocalise it. Basic fandom etiquette, we don't tag hate on character's tags. Back on the hate, she did conquered half a continent and put in power an bigoted theocracy, she did enslave a whole species (trolls) and she did commit genocide fucking twice (fire giants & ancient dragons). Like, I get why folks might hate her, especially with the whole genocide thing. She's undeniable a villain in this story.

I just think she's more than that. Cause she did all that, right? She destroyed so much and build as much. But when Godwyn and Ranni "die", she goes and tears it all down. Like, can you imagine? Literal eons upon eons of killing, burning and then building and creating over the ashes and corpses. And she throws literally everything away in grief. This is the main thing that I love about her. She is this cruel and ruthless Goddess, but she gradually loves her kids. I honestly think that the beginning of her plotting against the Greater Will was when she was forced to toss her Omen kids in the sewers. Is she hard on them? Yeah. They are demigods and they have so much shit to deal with just by being that. But she loves them in her own way.

Am I mixing headcanon with canon? Probably, yeah. But I don't care. I don't generally like villains, Imma keep the one I do close and if I have to ignore canon to do so, I will.

Also I'm sorry, I'm very tired (it's long past this "old" hag's bedtime :P). I hope this is understandable in some way. But yay! Marika love! &lt;3

#elden ring #asks #queen marika the eternal #before anyone goes moral police about the genocide thing #i'm half armenian #i'm well aware what a genocide is irl and the results of such a destruction #but the thing is that elden ring is fiction while the 1915-17 massacres were very much not

[d0d0-b0i]

(SPOILER FILLED) alrighty, time for some more cohesive thoughts on prime for me (since my last one was written directly after finishing it and now its had time to sit in my brain) (long post btw, i ramble @w@)

overall, i very much enjoyed it! the animation had me positively salivating over the fact that its /actually/ using animation techniques and not just. moving characters from A to B without the time for proper stylization. the overall plot was enjoyable and i am excited to see what the rest of the season will offer.

the fact that it is only one-third of the whole season also makes me a lot more forgiving about certain flaws i found at first, like only showing three worlds and not giving the characters a lot of time to breathe. theres the very high likelihood that such a thing actually will happen, and we might even see more places and worlds, which is an exciting thought! nonetheless, going in i did not know this as i was sleep deprived and had forgotten how many episodes the season has, so i felt a little bit salty, ngl.

Devon Mack does a very good job as sonic, and it makes me feel warm inside hearing his portrayal! every actor does a great job honestly, and it truly feels like they all understand the respective character they voice act(especially considering they have to acclimate the character /and/ voice for each new world. very talented!). the eggman voice actor could use some rerecords at times honestly;; but he does a good enough job that i only notice it sometimes; and he is fun to listen to regardless, and is just a subjective thought of mine.

the different universes also intrigue me! :D i really enjoyed the first one the jungle one was interesting and had beautiful flora models, but it is with this one that a problem of mine arises (but ill get to that later). the waterworld was also interesting, but kind of boring worldwise, since its just. water. (i get that its a pirate world and thats fine! i just cant give a good description of my feelings besides just. water. yknow?)

ive seen that a lot of people think rouge shouldve been the captain in the third world and. honestly. yeah. i think we might get to see why later on? but idk. i hope they have a reason that makes sense as to why she isnt, like if the worlds stick around and dont fuse back, shed be the next captain? weh! (i do love knuckles in a captains outfit though, so bonus points for that!)

now. i only have a few “criticisms”, and although some can be attributed to not being intended for me(and i will therefore not include cus. duh), there is one thing i just cannot let slip by.

(CRITIQUE START) the issue i have is that it feels so empty. new yolk (i refuse the yoke) is populated, but later episodes only really reuse the same five models roughly multiple times and i think had at most like 30? of them at the same time, and obviously could not have had more due to budget and such (which is understandable, but that still doesnt mean i cant point it out).

the jungle episodes! THE JUNGLE EPISODES?? ONLY HAD 5?? CHARACTERS MINUS SONIC (froggy counts) AT ALL TIMES?? and even the flashbacks only show those, probably so as not to imply death but like. come on. not even a few background characters at all? am i meant to believe they will all die out anyway simply by being the last people on this earth? im sorry i just cant get over this. you can make sean mcloughlin, mr jacksepticeye, get a cameo and his own personal character model, BUT CANNOT EVEN FILL A JUNGLE WITH PEOPLE?? did i miss something? if theyd shown even /one/ bg character once in a single frame in the flashbacks, id forgive it but i. cannot. im sorry. im nitpicking but come on! this is like the only issue i have. you only have 11 of the original characters in the first place (sonic. tails. knuckles. amy. rouge. big. froggy. shadow. eggman. orbot. cubot.), and then half of them are pretty much gone most of the time.

i just. its so empty? DO NOT GET ME WRONG I HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS. I DEEPLY ENJOY THIS SHOW! I LOVE THE CHARACTERS WEVE GOTTEN TO SEE !!! THAT DOES NOT MEAN I CANNOT COMPLAIN ABOUT SOMETHING I HAD TROUBLE PROCESSING. if its gonna be a show about sonic and his friendships. where the fuck are the rest of them? is all we’re gonna get homages to their characters? (jungle knuckles was just sticks. come on now. just put her in shes already canon to the mainline games now) sega, if youre going to make a show about his friendships, why wont you let his friends be there? why can you only license 11 of your characters to the show? please make me eat my words.

and yeah you could say that the reasons others arent there (in-canon, not because of legal issues) is because they werent hit close-up with the prism shatter, but neither was big? he was shown to be down by the hills when it exploded, and i dont know if that counts considering that orbot and cubot arent even in any episode besides the first one, and they werent visible in the blast, i do not know what the blast radius would be to affect anything else. eugh. idk man. this is like the ONE issue i have, and its so small it feels meaningless. yeah yeah the budget the tight grip on characters yadda yadda i get the reasons behind it but it still affects the endgoal and i should be allowed to point it out.                                                                                                                     (CRITIQUE OVER)

that being said. i am in love with the character designs! especially a big fan of sonics gloves and shoes in the pirate world. i fuck w/ that very much <3

anyway, thats it. show good. binge it if possible! we need netflix to know that we like this. and maybe theyll realize that one episode per week for this show would be perfect (im looking at you episode recaps)

#sonic prime #sonic prime spoilers #if i come off as neg at the crit part. sorry not sorry! its a small thing but it just bothers me for some reason #i am open to explanations or attempts at making me understand because i am very stupid <3 #anyway i respect the creators very clearly doing their best #theres a lot of love and labor put into this and that is very clear #the direction has intent and is going somewhere and i respect it a lot 👍 #and i am excited to see where it goes #anyway give me your thoughts if you have any and wanna share! i love hearing others out :D

[dowagersqueen]

Hi! I was rewatching ep. 7 and I was really wondering if Aemond is indeed riding Vhagar at the end, just the day after he got his eye slashed out, I'd love to know your thoughts on it if that was the case, to me it's hard to believe Alicent would even let him do it with such a fresh and serious wound like that, they had to have a conversation beforehand, how did she end up agreeing? would she ask Aegon and Helaena to keep an eye on him on the way? OR there's a possibility he might not even be riding Vhagar at the end after all? Because I remember asking myself how they got Vhagar to go all the way from Pentos to Driftmark without her rider, so maybe she would feel Aemond leaving and she just followed him to King's Landing? The first option seems more interesting to me though. And another unrelated thing, do you think Aegon may have comforted Aemond after the incident, or tried to at least?, I can see him feeling guilty for not being there when it happened but idk if he'd be able to externalize that into and apology or something, I wish we had got to see how their relationship evolved after this episode to how it is when they're adults. Anyway, sorry for the rambling! I hope you're well!

hi !!!! 

good questions!!! 

so firstly, i don’t think it would have been possible for aemond to ride vaghar so soon after his injury. in fact, aemond was probably being nursed until his injury was close to healing because the wound could get infected and the infection could kill him. corlys barely survives the fever. so there is no way aemond could have ridden vaghar at the end of episode 7. 

even if he was in any condition to ride her, which is a complex subject centering on how an eyewound like that could affect aemond (vaghar can ride without directions but aemond’s body would still be affected by the effort to be on vaghar), alicent would have not allowed him near vaghar until she wa sure he was at the very least close to healing. 

we probably don’t get to see it much but people died much easier during those times and alicent is quite the doting mother so i’m sure she was worried about him a lot. 

and i don’t think helaena or aegon were riding their dragons either. yeah, it would be fun, but even rhaenyra at their age makes the journey to driftmark on ship. 

would have been amazing to see aegon and helaena on their respective dragons though. and i bet that when aemond’s eye healed and he could ride vaghar again, alicent definitely asked aegon to look after him and he and helaena went to ride with him the first few times. would have been amazing to witness such a boding moment, of these three kids riding the skies on their dragons. 

secondly, i do think something happened there. i actually wished someone asked tgc or that tgc himself could have talked about this because to me it’s such a crucial moment in both aemond and aegon’s journeys. maybe one day someone will ask him to elaborate on this. 

but yeah, something happened after driftmark. something clicked in all of their heads and the dynamic changed. i’m not saying aegon suddenly realized all wrongdoings and showed his brother a lot of love because that’s not aegon’s style at all, but he understood, just like his mother said, that this is not a game. this is serious. aemond, his brother, lost an eye and his father did nothing about it. even more than that, his half sister asked for his little brother to be interrogated. 

and suddenly, all the bullying and the pranks and the mocking he did with the strongs @ aemond wasn’t anymore just aegon getting sweed validation by singling out aemond, it had actual horrible consequences. 

i think he definitely felt guilty because even in the driftmark scene aegon looked quite freaked out about what happened, but i don’t think aegon fully processed what happened while it was happening. i think the picture slowly came to him from that moment until he started watching aemond struggle with his new disability, by having his wound nursed and having to relearn some skills that aegon already knew he had. 

i don’t know if aegon ever said sorry for how he made fun of aemond, i don’t think they’re the type to have an easy time expressing their positive emotions to one another, both aemond and aegon, but they do it in other ways and one of the ways is aegon immediately standing for aemond at the feast. 

rhys has talked about this before in the context of his and alicent’s relationship and i think it fits to a degree here too: iit’s partially the trauma, partially the time they live in, but while they don’t know how to say “i love you / i care for you / etc” to each other, they find ways to show it to each other, EVEN negative ways of showing it to each other. 

it’s all about them not being able to be emotionally vulnerable with each other for different reasons. aegon has a whole bag of issues and for aemond... he’s been showed too many times that weakness = bad and due to the mocking and all, i don’t think he can easily be very open with aegon.

that being said i do think they both have love for each other

#asks #aegon ii targaryen #aemond targaryen

[cubedmango]

hi!! i just wanted to let you know that i started reading cherry magic in july last year after seeing the anime announced on toyota-sensei's twitter! i couldn't even rlly translate the announcement myself without the help of google translate LMAO but her illustration of them looked so sweet i had to snoop around. more than half a year later. i am no longer normal and my brain is fully rotted over and i think of those two nearly every waking moment!! your art, along with so many others feeds me and your translations are So Appreciated thank you for doing gods work. i usually don't get super involved in fandom or w/e other than consuming fanart or fics so the fact i find myself actually drawing them is so new to me...idk cherry magic really is so refreshing and it's just nice as an adult to see a mature relationship between two working adults. there are callbacks to childhood or childlike behaviors or interests sprinkled throughout the manga's dialogue and i always appreciated how they weren't seen as embarrassing or immature to embrace or learn from as an adult, but encouraged or seen as a valuable part of balancing work, life, and love. idk it's def one of the more subtle and less expanded upon parts of it but i love how adachi's and kurosawa's love of manga, though seen as a children's activity (from how kurosawa thought people saw it) was actually one of their first mutual hobbies. it's also interesting to see how many things about kurosawa's psyche are remnants of ideas probably for a lack of better wording, were taught to him from an early age. his self-image, how he tries to uphold certain societal standards, etc etc. im glad he found refuge in adachi that way. im sorry for rambling for so long but i've just been thinking about these two so much ldks

anon pls u never have to apologize for rambling abt my fav guys of all time, u should actually talk w me about them more i want to hear ur thoughts !! the eng speaking fandom isnt that big (or at least i dont get to interact w a lot of ppl personally) but its fun making art and doing the translations for my blorbos so im happy other ppl enjoy it too 🥺

and yess everything u said abt the childlike/immature stuff krdc enjoy like the fact that their interest in manga and stuff is never made fun of or anything (which would be ironic anyway since theyre In a manga themselves fdkjskf) but actually one of the things that gets them closer is So good augh?? (also spoilers for the radio drama if u havent seen it yet, but to me one of the best changes they made was changing the port scenes setting to an anime con instead like Yeah!! theyre little nerd guys of course theyd attend a con!!!! that plus how they both like watching animated movies and playing games too like its a very specific thing to Me but that relatability w stuff i do myself makes them both feel a lot more human? if that makes sense)

also w kurosawas whole deal its Definitely a longterm thing hes had for a while, and in canon its mostly been his friendships/relationships that affected him (probs the most clear in ch45 my beloved) but from the way the meeting w his parents went theres for sure a lot of parental/family pressure involved too?? this is going into hc territory but i have like a whole Thing brewing in my head about kurosawas and maris relations w their parents and how that affected their self image and all growing up too and i rlly wanna make stuff for it someday (idk if anyone would be interested but id probably do it regardless so fkdjksjfk)

#the full idea actually is for a whole mari spinoff as like a fic or smth bc i care her immensely . but that is ambitious even for me lol #i have Thoughts about these siblings though like their issues intrigue me so bad. so much wrong w them i need to pick apart #and similarly w adachi being a child of divorce like! thats got to have influenced him right. i Have To Know #i think about these charas a normal amount as u can tell 👍 #my answer

[livingfictionsystem]

So, my adhd/autistic freind has a grandmother with NPD who was extremely abusive towards her family, but i’m worried about my friends ableism towards other people with npd. she’s not met very many but she’s under the very common impression that everyone with npd is an abuser and an asshole, and idk if should get involved because her family was so hurt by someone with npd, but at the same time i’m worried about the way she’d behave if she met another person with npd in the future. do you have any advice?

Oooof.

Sparrow here. I'm sorry about your friend's family, sounds like some real generational trauma going on there.

Anecdotal storytime, sorry if this is rambly.

I did, a couple years ago, have a pretty big grudge against Borderline folks. My most recent abuser, Rowan, had borderline. We were on a pedestal, yknow, until we weren't. Same with my cohost's ex, AJ. A shitty ex-metamor of mine has BPD. I was straight up sick of pwBPD.

I know a lot about psychology but even I had this unfair anecdotal stereotype of someone locking themselves in the bathroom and hating you/needing you until you were stressed enough to give them what they wanted.

I knew *I* had some kinda serious disorder and was looking into bipolar when the highly ironic suggestion of Borderline hit me right in the face. And I mean I was TEXTBOOK, still am. I was in denial for a WHILE. The last thing I wanted was to see any reflection of my abuser in me. And people around me didn't really disparage NPD because they already had Xanthe's glittery, spotlight-hogging, self-aggrandizing self and thought they were p cool, but even people I was close with would take jabs at Bordies and I'd laugh along with them. I kept doing intense research just to prove it wrong in me and ended up proving it more and more right.

Then finally, I saw some positive examples. One of my besties in the outerworld has Borderline. Bojack Horseman, of all things, really helped me accept it in myself. I joined some online support groups. I see how loving we are, how creative, how most of us make fun of our own mood swings and our sui-ideation. How protective we are, how our impulsivity ends up with some really cool experiences and connections.

Now I've accepted it. But it would've been a lot harder of a road if I didn't have positive examples. And yknow Borderline is p much a half sibling to Narcissism.

Xanthe and Jasper were my great examples of NPD. Their hyper-independence, how that manipulative side can be used to talk friends out of spirals or abusive relationships, how they make sure everyone who benefits them has some sort of give-and-take even if they have to pull strings to do it, the intense insecurity and self-loathing under the arrogant facade. And omg are they masters at social chess, which is awesome when my tactless ass is floundering in turmoil and people wanna cancel me by proxy.

It's really only gonna be positive rep that does it for some people. Maybe your friend has a fave character that actually fits the NPD profile. (Alastor from Hazbin gives me NPD vibes p hard tbh.) Tons of creatives have it, like literally being self-absorbed is part of being famous lol. If you've got good examples to work with, it becomes a Lot easier.

Even better if you've got someone willing to poke fun at their disorder and educate. I can also always drop more NPD stories/memes/resources for you to have in your arsenal. And even just educating about other traumagenic disorders like BPD and DID and stuff may help other disorders by proxy, the same logic does apply.

But your friend may never accept it. And that would suck. But people want to blame a set of stereotypes rather than the casual cruelty of the universe. It's up to you whether that becomes a topic that you two just can't talk about or if it ends a friendship tbh.

But yeah sorry for the ramble, I hoped the more raw experience might help the perspective. Lmk if you have any specific scenarios or anything!

-Sparrow 🧷

#narcissistic personality disorder #npd #borderline personality disorder #bpd #stigma #cluster b #ask #psychology nerd to the rescue #anon

[aftout]

Sorry for SU posting on main I’m aware that it’s, like, a show and a half when it comes to thinking critically about media but with its recent resurgence on certain platforms I’ve been pondering like a bitch over one topic specifically and it’s just??

I love, love Rose Quartz’s character. It’s a hot take I know but I truly love what the series did with her, as rushed as it was at times. Rose is so important to me because she is what Steven Universe is all about: growth, forgiveness, and change.

There’s the obvious: she went from presenting herself as a diamond to presenting herself as a quartz. She changed her name. She moved from homeworld to Earth. She went from surrounding herself with the other diamonds and their colonies to surrounding herself with humans and the crystal gems. But even outside of all the things that are presented to you surface level, her entire existence and personality revolves around changing.

The earliest stage of her that we see in the show is, iirc, the dream sequence where Stevonnie is in her position (on that abandoned command center) with Connie’s mom replicating Yellow Diamond. Rose was, at that point, a literal child. Though not in consecutive order, we see how Rose goes from a spoiled, overly emotional, and even abused kid to this levelheaded, grown woman. And that is literally what the show is all about. I keep saying this over and over again but she is so integral to SU’s overarching theme. She’s imperfect, both as a gem and also as a person, but like? She persists and moves forward. She’s so human.

Even in context of design, her quartz form looks substantially more humane than most of the other gems do. She mingles with humanity constantly and even goes as far as to give birth to a (mostly) human son. She is messy. The rubble of it all means a lot to me because I feel like SU did a good job at portraying just how ugly trauma can be. We really see this in Future, where Steven has an onscreen meltdown and finally cracks under several seasons’ and a movie’s worth of trials and tribulations. It’s really interesting to me because I feel like, in that story arc, we really see that he is his mother’s son.

I don’t think it’s outlandish to say that SU does touch on themes about generational trauma. Rose has her baggage from her days as a diamond, and clearly though she tried her best to grow and break the cycle, there were a few bumps and bruises that got passed down onto Steven. He then goes on his own journey to heal and break the cycle himself. Hell, both of their stories even end with them leaving Greg and the Crystal Gems behind; and though Steven doesn’t sacrifice himself in the way that Rose did, there is still that feeling of moving on and accepting the next stage of life: whether it be finally allowing oneself to grow up or, well, die.

These themes of growing up are found in the Spinel debacle, as well. Rebecca Sugar themself said that a lot of Spinel’s character was based off of this situation they found themself in where they left a toy rabbit they had in the garden, forgot about it, and then found it again six months later. They described it as “wondering how they could be so careless over something they thought they loved so much.” It’s rough because, unlike Sugar’s stuffed rabbit, Spinel is sentient. But even then, throughout the movie she is described as Pink’s toy. Symbolically she captures what it’s like to grow out of toys you once loved as a child. And then, at the end, she is taken in by the other diamonds to reminisce over who Pink once was; much like how parents may keep old stuffed animals their kids owned as a memory.

Idk. At this point I’m fully rambling (I had better points when I was talking to myself about this and making myself cry), but I just. Yeah. Rose is such a wonderful character to me. Her humanity and imperfection means a lot. I think it’s cool to have such a nuanced character be shown in children’s media, and seeing her development is genuinely fascinating. I think she really shows that beauty isn’t necessarily found in one’s pain, but in the strength they withhold to power through it. Does that make any sense? Idk.

#long post #again sorry for su posting on main but this has been plaguing me for a while now. i only just really figured out what it was i wanted to— #—say. su was a very flawed show; but it did still have an important impact. #lol kinda like rose herself. life imitates art.