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#so maybe i pathetically feel a little less alone
sexybabystevie · 2 years
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how you know things are bad - i deeply miss dean winchester
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seattlesellie · 11 months
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don’t cross the line
pairing: ellie williams x reader
warnings: smut (mdni), cheating, angst, mutual masturbation, just morally wrong, mentions of alcohol
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Parties in Jackson fucking suck.
It’s not like youve ever been at a different party, but still. You’ve read about them in the little magazines from the old days you found on patrols. Small blurbs about meaningless celebrities, a concept you barely even understood, drinking themselves to oblivion. Paparazzi pictures of young starlets in black limousines, rappers getting coked up in dark bathrooms. You never really got it. Parties in Jackson were like a parallel universe.
“They must have made that up” you told Dina, your best friend and trusty patrol partner. “Nope” she shrugged. “Heard that Paris Hilton girl was really like that.”
Paris hilton would have hated Jackson parties. A bunch of old people, and a handful of young ones, dancing around to the beat of an old country song, if you could even call that a beat.
You could have responded with a simple “No thanks” when Jesse had invited you to tonights party. You could have told him you were tired, busy, sick, he would have left you alone - But you didn’t, alas, this is how you found yourself here. Alone, in an old barn, listening to the batshit insane, drunk ramblings of an old fart named Seth.
“Ripped that fella’s throat with just one move” Seth mumbled, laughing stupidly at his own words.
“Go — got him real good n’dirty, I tell ya”
Whoever said “respect the elderly” clearly never met Seth. His breath reeked of whiskey and cigarettes that he traded for food and supplies, and my god, he was standing so close you could see the veins in his yellow tinted eyeballs. You really were too polite for your own good, you thought to yourself, because Ellie would have shoved him away already.
Ellie.
You felt like slapping yourself in the face. What the hell does she have to do with this? Why can’t you just let it fucking go already? It truly was desperate, and pathetic, and borderline immoral, the amount you spent thinking about that girl.
So what if she used to be your best friend. So what if she was the first girl who ever made you feel something, even if it was too late. She has a girlfriend, and she’s not thinking about you, she doesn’t care, maybe never has, probably never will. She left you for her, with that useless excuse of “Cat doesn’t like it when we hang out” followed by a pathetic “We can do it in secret, though.”, when she saw your eyes turn glossy and your breath hitch up. Fuck her, and fuck those memories. Fuck all the nights you spent together telling each other your deepest and darkest desires, and especially fuck that time you almost-
“Hey”
You'd recognize that voice anywhere.
A royal blue flannel button up shirt appeared at the corner of your eye.
“Mind if I steal her for a sec, Seth?”
She sounded raspy, laced with that velvety layer her voice had adorned whenever she had a sip or more of Whiskey. When you drank together for the first time, at the ripe age of sixteen, next to a big bonfire and the ever so familiar scent of pine lacing your sense of smell, you told her that she sounds different when she’s drunk. More mature, somehow. Less fidgety, slower, sultrier. She replayed that sentence over and over again in her head. “Sultry”, she whispered to herself. “I sound sultry.”
Seth cleared his throat, a deep cough escaping his lungs.
“Of course, pretty girl like her shouldn’t be around me for too long, might start acting all wild!” The old man threw his hands in the air, and disappeared somewhere in the scarce crowd.
Your heartbeat was faster than normal, but that’s not new. Not when she was around, anyways.
Ellie stood by your side, hands crossed over her chest. She had a glass of Rum in her hand, not Whiskey. Funny.
“You’re a Rum type of girl now?” you questioned, never meeting her gaze. If you bothered to look to your side, you would have noticed she was staring.
“Fame’s changed me, I guess” She responded, mixing the fluid in her glass.
One week ago, Ellie went on patrol. One week ago, Ellie killed more infected in one go than anyone else had in years. She was the town’s hero, the infected slayer. Cat even made her a badge. She wasn’t wearing it now.
“Cat or fame?” you quietly mumbled under your breath.
You weren’t spectacularly brave with your words, but one glass of presumably expired white wine made a simple girl go very far.
“Hah. Funny” she scoffed dryly, earning her Rum another pointless swirl.
“You’re the towns hero, I’m the towns comedian, we’re both pretty famous, i’d say.”
Ellie’s gaze was fixed on the wall. She squinted her eyebrows slightly, humming in response. You looked over at her, for just a second, noticing the dim light reflecting in her eyes. She was a sight to behold, the most beautiful girl you’ve ever seen. You wish she knew that. You wish you could be the one to tell her.
You inhaled deeply, and it came out so shaky that when you exhaled you were terrified she heard the tremor in your body.
“Thank’s for the save, by the way” you said quietly, apologetic. You even smiled politely, which was absolutely for nothing, because she wasn’t looking at you, avoiding your gaze like the plague.
It’s not like Ellie and you didn’t talk since that night she told you she couldn’t see you anymore. It’s been two whole years. You had to talk, you had to communicate somehow, even if it was through polite smiles and dry conversations during shared patrols. Hell, you even went to Cat’s birthday party you somehow were invited to. Dina was practically on her knees begging you to come with her, and who could say no to Dina when she looked at them with those puppy eyes that could tug at a monsters heartstrings?
“Yeah, no problem. That man’s a fucking dickhead” Ellie scoffed, leaned against the bar and crossed her legs.
“Where’s Cat?” you questioned. Are you sure you only had one glass of wine?
“She’s not here” Ellie responded dryly, seemingly annoyed at your question. She almost tsk’d when you asked. She didn’t look surprised by your rude antics, maybe you got like this more often than you thought. How about that time you told her you’re surprised Cat didn’t pack her a sandwich with a sticker on it’s wrapper during patrol?
“I can tell… why?” you inquired. Your own voice was deeper too, it almost matched hers.
“Didn’t wanna come” Ellie said, stuffing a hand inside her pocket. She was uncomfortable, clearly, and wanted, needed, to make you shut up. It’s not because your presence annoyed her, It’s because she knew she was wrong. She knew she fucked up when she ditched you, and if only you knew how it was eating her alive every day. She had to do it, because in her eyes, she would have done something much worse if she hadn’t.
Being around you when she wasn’t with Cat was hard enough, because she knew she could never have you, that you’d never want her. Not if you knew. You were too smart, and too good, to ever want to be with her. Cat was easy, she didn’t ask too many questions. She’d lay there for Ellie when Ellie told her to, and she would agree to stop a conversation when it got too personal. When Ellie cried at night, and woke up sweating, she didn’t ask why. She let it go, and Ellie knew you never would have. You’d fucking hate her if you knew. She could have saved the world — and she didn’t. He didn’t let her. The wounds she had were too deep, they were clawing and tugging at her skin from the inside. Ellie was a tortured soul, and you didn’t deserve that. That’s why she left, and maybe, that’s why she was here right now.
“That’s too bad” you mumbled quietly. You did your best to make it sound genuine, and you failed miserably.
Ellie scoffed.
“Yeah”
You shifted slightly, and walked over to stand right in front of her. You met her eyes for the first time. Those stupid, beautiful emerald eyes.
Ellie looked down, and looked up at you. She swallowed deeply.
“Anyways” you sighed. “Think I’m gonna go”
“Already?” she questioned, slamming her Rum filled glass on the bar counter.
“Yeah, I’m cold and it sucks in here, so” you said, and smiled politely. It really was freezing, and talking to her like this was painful enough.
“Let me walk you” she blurted.
What?
“Huh?” walk you where? the door? you knew where it was.
She tugged at the loose string on the bottom of her button up. It was ironed, where did Ellie find and iron? Did Maria do it for her? Town hero perks?
“Let me walk you home” she repeated, her voice carrying a touch of insistence. Once again, you found yourself captivated by her burning gaze, those eyes that seemed to hold secrets yet to be unveiled.
“I can walk home alone, Ellie” You huffed, ever the stubborn.
“No” she exclaimed.
“Maria said it’s been pretty dangerous”
“I can have my own back, you know, I’m not an idiot” You scoffed. You knew she didn’t think you were an idiot, why did she have to walk you home?
“I know that — Just wanna make sure you’re safe”
“Gosh, Ellie thank you! thank you!” You said in the most high pitched voice you could fathom. “The town’s hero is at it again, everybody!” You exclaimed, slightly raising your voice, earning both of you a few curious looks from the townspeople.
Ellie wasn’t embarrassed. She was just annoyed. And she wanted to slap you in the face for being so stubborn.
She grasped your arm with an unexpected forcefulness, pulling you along as she swiftly guided you outside. In the process, you accidentally bumped into a few people, hastily muttering a string of apologetic "sorry" and "excuse me" as you hurriedly tried to navigate through the crowd. You attempted to resist her firm grip, trying to free yourself with a burst of strength, but you found yourself overpowered by her determination.
Once she managed to pull you outside, she finally released her grip on your arm, allowing you a brief respite from her firm hold.
“You are not walking me anywhere, Williams” you scoffed. What made her think you needed her help?
“You’ve always been so fucking stubborn” she turned to face you. Her hands were on her hips. Her face wore the same expression she did when you went on your first patrol together, when you insisted on going left, even though she knew you had to go right.
“I’m walking now” you stepped away, and started walking. “And if you followed me — you wouldn’t be walking me home, you’d be stalking me” you exclaimed as you backed away.
Ellie quickly followed your pace, her boots stomping on the snow covered ground.
“You are”
Step
“So fucking annoying”
This was the longest conversation you’ve had with Ellie in two whole years. It felt like nothing’s changed, except for everything.
The following ten minutes were torturous. You were walking fast, Ellie right behind you. No words were exchanged between you, the silence enveloping the crisp air as you both walked in silence. Your attention turned inward, focusing on the sensation of the cold air filling your lungs with each breath, and the soft sound of Ellie's boots pressing against the creaking snow beneath her.
You finally arrived at your place. It’s grey exterior blanketed in a pristine layer of snow. Every inch of its structure was adorned with a delicate coat of white.
You turned around to face her.
Ellie’s skin appeared slightly flushed, with a rosy tinge highlighting her cheeks, and her nose bore a noticeable reddish hue, hinting at the crisp winter air. She didn’t say a word.
You took a deep breath. She looked cold.
“Want me to make you some tea?” you questioned. You didn’t mean to let her in, and she didn’t expect you to ask. She looked surprised, her eyebrows turned slightly upwards.
“M’fine” Ellie insisted, her voice resolute despite the chill in the air. She sought warmth by tucking her hands deep into the pockets of her dark green coat.
“Jesus, Ellie — Just come inside” you urged, the concern evident in your voice.
“If walking you was stalking wouldn’t coming in be breaking and entering?” she inquired, a sarcastic tone lacing her words.
“Just —“ you uttered, your voice trailing off as you reached for the doorknob, slowly opening the door.
“Come inside”
"Fine," Ellie relented, her resolve wavering as she decided to follow in your footsteps.
The house welcomed you with its cozy warmth, though slightly disorganized in its appearance. Yet, amidst the subtle chaos, it remained a comforting sanctuary, always your safe space. Being there brought a sense of solace, as if the troubles of the outside world faded away. And with Ellie's presence by your side, an inexplicable tingling sensation spread through your being.
You proceeded to heat up some water, carefully attending to the task of preparing tea, a familiar ritual.
Ellie never knew where to sit, or where to stand, so there she was, examining every single one of your movements. The air felt thick, like you could cut the tension with a switchblade.
"Your house looks different," she murmured in a low voice, leaning against the cream-colored wall.
“Bad different?” You questioned, taking out two mugs from the cupboard.
“No, just… more stuff” she murmured.
"Well," you uttered as you gently placed the teabag into the awaiting mug. “You haven’t been here in a while, so”
Ellie hummed in response, and bit her lower lip.
“You’ve kind of changed too.” you murmured.
“Tattoos looking bigger. And you look more tired. Plus, your shirt looks ironed, so maybe you even… showered? Woah.” you teased.
“Fuck, you really are funny huh?” she said, crossing her arms.
“Always were a sucker for my jokes” you responded with a sly smile.
She didn’t mean to say what she said next, because that was like opening a pandora’s box. Or, more like, the gates to hell.
“This is the longest conversation we’ve had in years” Ellie murmured. You handed her the green colored mug, your finger brushing her’s for a second. You both flinched.
“Mhm” you took a sip from your tea. It was still so hot, it burned your tongue.
“And who’s fault is that?” You questioned, raising your eyes to meet her burning gaze. It was incredibly impulsive.
Ellie rolled her eyes. She looked baffled.
“You still don’t get it, do you? She questioned.
“Get what? that your girlfriend doesn’t like me? trust me Ellie, I get that, crystal clear.” You smiled, as you slammed your mug on the counter.
“I’m not doing this right now” she declared, her tone firm and resolute.
Oh, did that sentence burn through you.
“I think you are” you stepped forward to face her. She looked terrified, like a lost puppy. Not so “town’s hero” now. Thank god she wasn’t wearing Cat’s badge, because she would have looked ridiculous.
“I’m not” she said quietly, looking at the floor beneath her.
You felt the ever so familiar lump forming in your throat. She owed you.
“Tell me what it is exactly that I don’t get” you spat. The pent up anger from all these years finally just fucking bursted. She left you. She left you for her, your best fucking friend.
“It’s just funny how she didn’t give a shit about Jesse, or Dina, or anybody! Just fucking me, right? I’m the fucking problem?” you blurted. Your voice was shaky, filled with rage. The tears in your eyes started forming. You didn’t even know how much you were holding it inside of you, it all overflowed, at 2AM, right in your kitchen. Right where she told you she couldn’t see you anymore.
Ellie was frozen, her mouth parted slightly. She was flushed, and it showed. It wasn’t the cold weather anymore, it was you. She didn’t expect this to happen so fast. She came inside for some fucking tea.
That’s when you shoved her. And she didn’t even fucking move.
“Don’t fucking do this to me” she begged. Her voice was desperate, and shaky, and what the fuck was she hiding?
You found yourselves standing uncomfortably close to each other, the proximity palpable. The warmth of her breath gently grazed your forehead, creating a tantalizing sensation that sent a shiver down your spine.
She took a deep breath.
“What I did was bad. But — fuck, Jesse and Dina never slept over, you know that?”
The room fell quiet.
“So?” you whispered. You couldn’t even look at her.
“Don’t do this” she begged. Her eyes were glossy. She looked as if she was about to cry, too. Her chest was pressed up against yours.
“I’m not doing anything” you mumbled quietly. Her body was so warm. You felt like you were about to have a heart attack, and Ellie felt like she already did.
“If I would have stayed… I would have done something… so much worse” she whispered. Her hands were trembling.
“What would you have done?” you whispered against her. Dangerously close now. You could feel her unsteady heartbeat.
“You know” she whispered back. You saw the vein on her neck, how beautifully spattered the freckles on her skin were, like a constellation.
“Please” you begged.
That’s all it took.
Almost.
"No," she whispered, her voice barely audible. The proximity between your lips was almost intimate, an agonizingly close distance.
“Please” you begged.
Her eyes were dark, breaths unsteady and fast, like she just ran a marathon. Her chest was rising up and down. She’s dreamt of this moment, for so fucking long. But she couldn’t. She couldn’t fuck more people up. She’s done more than enough.
“You don’t know what you fucking do to me” She whispered against your skin. Her eyes were shut closed. If she didn’t see, maybe it would’ve been less wrong. If she didn’t see, maybe Cat wouldn’t either. She could go home, kiss her girlfriend good night. Walk away. But there you were, pressed up against her, making her head spin like a carousel, fogging her brain with your scent, and your lips, and all of the times she pictured you like this, helpless and begging. She never looked at Cat how she looked at you. Cat never made her feel like she could faint at any given moment. Cat was safe, she was a sunny day. You were a thunderstorm, a cloud, soaking her up. When Ellie said she would have done something so much worse, she meant that.
Cat was right when she told her to stay away, she always was. When Ellie begged Cat to stop her ramblings, Cat told her she looks at you like she’s hungry. That it’s disgusting, that she wishes it was her. She was crying, and begging, and she was right. That’s why Ellie knocked on your door that way. One person she could save.
Ellie’s hands were firmly pressed up against the wall, locking you in.
“You dont know…” she whispered.
You whimpered silently at her words. You were aching everywhere, you just needed her to do something.
“Show me” you said, and it came out more as a plead. You were begging her.
Ellie leaned in, drawing her face closer to yours, and your lips delicately brushed against each other. The electrifying touch sent a shiver down your spine, evoking a soft, involuntary moan that escaped your lips. It went straight to her heart, and then slipped right to her cunt.
Her lips were plump against yours. Just barely touching.
She delicately brushed her lips against yours, causing a gentle collision that sent a jolt of electricity through both of you. A shaky breath escaped her mouth.
“Ellie…” you whispered. Ellie, just do it. you can’t take it anymore.
She abruptly slammed her hands against the wall, causing it to tremor ever so slightly. The suddenness of the action startled you, making you jump in response.
“Shit” she huffed.
And her lips weren’t against yours anymore, neither was she.
Ellie backed away. She couldn’t.
Your lips quivered, and there it was. Her precious thunderstorm erupting.
The tears came out hot, and sticky. They ran all over your cheeks. You let out a quiet sob. Ellie was staring, her breaths uneven and her mouth agape. She almost did what shes been dreaming of doing since the moment she saw you. Almost.
your legs betrayed you, giving out completely. You crumbled down onto the floor, unable to stand any longer. With tears welling up in your eyes, you instinctively curled up, bringing your head between your legs as you tried to suppress the sobs that threatened to consume you.
It was a truly pathetic sight, Ellie towering over your quivering body. It’s been two whole years, and you missed her every single day that passed. It was gnawing at you. Seeing them hand in hand, kissing on the street, making out behind the dumpster. Thinking of Ellie hugging her at night, caressing her skin, touching her everywhere, telling her she loves her, fucking her, tasting her and not you. It should have been you. But it couldn’t be.
If only you knew that when Ellie was between her thighs, you were the only one she thought of. If only you knew Ellie had to bite her lip till it bled to stop from screaming your name. That’s why Ellie always turned off the lights, That’s why Ellie shoved Cat’s face down on the bed with her entire palm when she took her from behind. That’s why she always closed her eyes.
Her body gave up on her, too.
She sat on the cold concrete floor, trying to steady her breaths.
“Look at me” she commanded. It was breathy, and shaky, more of a plea than a real command.
You wiped your tears.
“I can’t” you whispered.
“Please” she begged.
You mustered the strength to lift your face, raising your gaze to meet hers.
“I think about you all the time” you blurted.
She huffed in response. Your soft voice was killing her. She couldn’t even respond. She just watched.
“Ellie…” you whined. The distance between you was torturous. There was so much space, and at the same time, no space at all. You could still feel her lips brushing against yours. You wished you could taste her. She yearned for that even more. She felt like something was chaining her down to the floor, holding her captive.
What you did next, is something Ellie had buried deep inside her darkest fantasies.
You delicately caressed your smooth neckline, doe eyes burning through her’s.
Ellie swallowed deeply.
“What are you doing?” she mumbled, lower than a whisper. Her voice was raspy, and her pupils were blown out. She was imagining, for sure, hallucinating, intoxicated by the picture of you being pressed up against her. It couldn’t be real.
“I need you” you whimpered.
She almost crawled right to you right then and there. Her knees were spread open in front of you. Her breath hitched in her throat. Her heart felt like it was leaping out of her chest.
“You cant” she insisted. It felt like she tried to convince herself, and not you. You couldn’t. There’s no way.
“I want you” you whispered, lowering your hand to caress your breasts.
Something took over you. Being pent up with frustration for years birthed such a desperate sight, she couldn’t fathom it.
She grunted in response. Do that again and she’d lose her fucking mind.
You cupped your breast.
Ellie threw her head against the wall. She forgot how to breathe. Her nostrils were flared, and she almost slapped herself in order to convince her that this was real. This was happening.
“Holy shit” she wheezed.
“Please” you begged, and squeezed your breast forcefully. Your nippled hardened against the material, so you gave them a twist, sending a bolt of electricity right through your clothed cunt.
Ellie’s mouth was agape. She was transfixed, mesmerized. Her cheeks grew more red by the second. It was so fucking wrong, she almost told you to stop, but she couldn’t. Her voice felt dry and her brain was buzzing. Her ex best friend was so desperate for her she couldn’t even help herself.
The image of Cat went through her head. Cat seeing, walking in. Cat trembling and crying, telling her she told her so. Cat screaming at her that she’s an awful person, that she hurt her, That she should burn in hell.
Then, you took your shirt off.
And Cat was gone.
Her eyes were darting from your tits to your needy eyes. You were giving her that look she only saw in her dreams. That desperate, pathetic twinkle in your eye. She saw a girl look like that in an old porno she found. Ever since, that picture of your face replacing the actresses burned through her memory. She knew it was for her, you were showing her, but she looked like she wasn’t supposed to see, a peeping tom, a pervert. Her cunt twitched inside her tight black boxers. Cat never made her cunt feel like this.
The dainty lace bra adorned your body. you looked like an angel, eyes red from crying, cheeks still wet, chest rising up and down. She wanted to ruin you.
You stopped for a second, looked for a sign to keep going.
The room was silent, the only noises that muttered were your soft whimpers and Ellie’s harsh, uneven breaths.
“Take it off” she whispered. You almost couldn’t believe she said that. You nodded pathetically. She always knew you’d be like this. She imagined you nodding your head frantically, kneeling beneath her and undoing her belt, way too many times she wouldn’t dare to admit. Her heavy breaths were a confession to all of her sins.
You unclasped your bra, your tits spilling out of it with a sigh of relief.
Ellie was hypnotized, fully staring. She remembered the first tine she saw you in a bikini. Jesse noticed she was staring, and he gave her some advice. “Look at the ground or the sky, pretend there’s something super interesting going on there”
She didn’t need to pretend now.
“Fuck” she grunted, feeling her cunt twitch inside her briefs. Her mouth was agape, she wanted those nipples between her teeth. Her tongue slightly moved involuntarily inside her mouth, imitating the kitten licks she’d give your tits if she could. It was truly pathetic. Thank god you couldn’t see. Her fists were clenched, and she was forcing her feet onto the ground. If she pretended something was pulling her in, she wouldn’t crawl towards you and take you like she always wanted.
You toyed with your nipples, rolling them between your fingers, almost as if you read her mind.
“Spit on ‘em” Ellie demanded desperately.
“Ellie…” You whimpered, her voice was making you grow wetter by the second. If you took your pants off, she could see the wet patch that soaked through your panties, making them almost sheer. You were almost embarrassed, but it was too late now.
“Do it” she commanded.
“Do it for me” Ellie begged. She brought a hand up to cup at her perky clothed breast. She imagined it was you, your tits between her fingers. She wanted to squeeze the fat, take it in, spit on it, latch her mouth onto your nipples, slap them as you ride her thigh, or her face, or her whatever the fuck you wanted.
The saliva ran down your chest, droplets flowing at an incredibly slow pace, each and every one of them teasing Ellie, mocking her. Almost there, almost reaching your sensitive nipples. When it finally did, Ellie was breathing so heavy she almost wheezed.
You rubbed the spit all over your tits, glazing your nipples with the liquid, coating them shiny with your saliva - all for her. You were staring at ellie with your mouth open. You moaned at the sensation, making Ellie shift and slightly slide off the wall. She was gone.
“Feels so good” you whined.
“Fucking shit” She huffed. She bucked her hips, searching for that friction. She didn’t do it yet, but oh she will.
“Mhhm” you hummed, a high pitched moan escaping your lips.
Ellie almost went cross eyed.
“Need you, please” You whispered while massaging your breasts. You were squeezing the fat harshly, almost punishing yourself for being such a dirty, desperate girl.
“Show me” She begged, in between breaths.
“Show me how bad - shit”
You cupped your cunt, your hand feeling warm over it. Your clit twitched. Ellie let out a moan so deep, you almost came right then and there, all over your panties.
You circled your clit through your pants, teasing Ellie without even realizing. I can do it, and you can’t! It felt like you were mocking her.
“Take that shit off — fuck” she huffed. Her hand was resting on her thigh, pinching it. Stay down. Don’t crawl, don’t fuck, don’t cheat.
In a matter of six seconds, your pants were on the floor. You crossed your legs together in embarrassment. What if she saw how wet you were?
“Spread” She commanded.
You looked at her stupidity.
“Spread ‘em, please” Ellie begged.
You spread your legs slowly, revealing your soaked white cotton panties to Ellie. Her eyes rolled back at the sight.
“Fucking shit” she grunted.
Her hand met her own cunt and gave it a stinging slap, followed by a desperate grunt. She moved her veiny hand up and down, almost grabbing her pussy. She felt perverted, and sickly, and so, so good. The friction of her hand on her cunt was followed by a string of deep moans, chanting your name like a prayer. She didn’t even know how bad she needed it.
“Wider” She commanded.
You spread your legs so wide your thighs almost hurt. When Ellie saw that wet spot, she lost it.
“So wet” she whispered in disbelief.
“Show me that pussy” She whimpered.
“Show me that fucking pussy”
You moved your panties to the side, the cold air hitting your clit making you flinch. You swore you could cum just from clenching in and out, listening to the obscenities leaving her mouth.
“Holy shit” She moaned, and cupped her cunt forcefully.
“So pretty” she whispered. It was even prettier than she thought, glistening folds and a little puffy button poking out. She needed to see inside, everywhere.
“Spread it with your fingers” She grunted. You parted your lips with your pointer finger and your thumb, wide open for her. She saw how bad you were clenching, begging for something inside. Your puffy clit moved with every pull.
“Wanna fuck you so bad” she groaned, it was killing her.
“Need to see you Ellie, please, please” you begged.
With that whine leaving your mouth, Ellie unzipped her jeans, and pulled down her boxers slowly, revealing you of the most beautiful sight youve ever seen in your life.
Her thighs were creamy, a mound of soft, dark hair adorning her pubis. Her slick was shining on her milky inner thighs from the boxer briefs she took off slightly brushing on them. She was so wet, it almost glistened like a far away star, deep in the galaxy. Her mouth was parted and she looked famished.
Tiny droplets of sweat were shining on her forehead, making her hair stick to her face. She was a panting, desperate mess.
You couldn’t help but slide your hand up your thigh, and started running your fingers through your glistening folds. Finally. “Oh god, Ellie” you moaned. You wished those were her fingers, if you could, if you only could.
Ellie moaned like a porn star at the sight. You thought she might tease herself, might play with her cunt before doing something. She proved you wrong.
She slid two long fingers inside her aching hole, squelching sounds filling the air. She pumped them in and out, fucking herself like a madwoman. Her hungry eyes were fixated on your fingers caressing your needy cunt. Her mouth was watering, borderline drooling, soft “ah!”s escaping her lips.
You circled your clit slowly, and felt your lower stomach leap at the contact. You lapped your slick with your middle finger, and sucked on it. It was obscene. Ellie’s cunt twitched. She almost came.
“Good girl” She groaned at the sight.
“Faster” She commanded, a deep moan escaping her lips.
You fastened your pace, and she was looking you directly in the eyes while pumping her fingers inside her cunt. With every pump, you could see a milky cream coating her fingers, the sight alone made your puffy clit ache with pleasure.
It was so wrong, and obscene, and pathetic, and you almost came.
“Fucking shit — fuck yourself, show me, fuck yourself” She whimpered, fastening her pace as well. The moans that left her mouth were deep, bursting from the inside of her soul.
Her fucking ex best friend.
“E — Ellie m’close” you whined, inserting a finger inside your soaking hole.
“Can see how fucking tight you are - fuck”
“Faster, do it f’me baby faster” She groaned.
The harmony of your moans intertwined, creating an intoxicating symphony.
“Ellie — gonna cum, fuck” You babbled, drool running down your chin. You were so close, eyes rolling to the back of your Ellie filled brain.
“Please fuck me, please fuck me”
“Cu — Fuck, shit, m’cuming” Ellie grunted.
“Say my fucking name” She demanded, her words coming out so sloppy and ridiculous.
“Ellie — Ellie! Please!”
Ellie almost screamed. She wanted to tell you to come for her, wanted to hear the noises youd make, see your face twist and the screams of her name, but she couldn’t help herself, the sight of your desperate cunt and the look on your face, so stupid, so cumdrunk, so pathetic, begging her to fuck you - brought her to the edge. It errupted inside of her like a volcano, pumping and squeezing on her fingers. She rode her orgasm until it tickled and hurt.
When you came, Ellie almost shed a tear.
This wasn’t just wrong.
This was vile.
She pulled up her pants up and left without saying a word, too embarrassed to look you in the face.
When she got home, Cat was sound asleep on her bed. She gave her a delicate kiss on the cheek, and whispered;
“I’m so sorry”
2K notes · View notes
moonit3 · 7 months
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THE PERFECT LOVER!
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➥ warnings/notices: yandere, violence, obsession, codependency, blood, murder, gender neutral reader but you are into guys only, axel is a little sh*t at first but then becomes a yandere, reader’s ingenuity, implied depression, slow burn, stalking, obsession.
➥ yandere! rent-a-boyfriend x gn! reader
➥ synopsis: desperate to be loved after rejections and being stand up numerous times, you hire a rent-a-boyfriend to delude yourself that someone actually loves you.
➥ a/n: with the poll done, here the post choose by you guys! for the story, i think i got this idea from the rent-a-girlfriend manga? but the story is pretty boring and don’t lead to anywhere as every character dumb ^ ^ , so i have decided to write something based on this plot with yandere, blood and some violence. this piece won’t have any smut on it, sorry. this work is longer than my others, aware.
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➥ like every start of the weekend, you are left to be alone at a friday night that you believed to be the day that you were going to meet your soulmate, but that was wrong. turns out the guy isn’t coming up for this second date as he texted, sorry. but you aren’t as attractive as I thought you would be!, resulting in you paying the drink you ordered was you were waiting for him to show up and walking back home.
➥ arriving home, you just throw yourself into the bed, ignoring the cute clothes and makeup you put on to impress that idiot, that doesn’t matter with the tears already flowing down to your chest. why this keep happening to you? all people you know or see in the streets are happily living their lives with someone at their side, even having children after years of being together. but you, you didn’t even got to the second phase of dating nor a boyfriend, all guys would just ghost you after the first date (if they even bother to show up).
➥ could it be that you are destined to be alone? your heart is breaking piece by piece with every failure that lead you to a final attempt in order to make you feel less lonely, a rent-a-partner dating site. it’s really bad that you are hiring someone to pretend to be your love, your are paying them to make up for your loneliness. you are quite pathetic, right?
➥ scrolling at the numerous pages full of candidates, you came across one that easily called your attention. axel, auburn hair with freckles all over his face and of course, a cute smile! the picture itself made you blush and already imagine the millions scenarios with him. a picnic at the park, maybe a shopping date where he buys you the jewelry you always wanted or even holding your hands! stay chill, [name]. he is a rent-a-boyfriend, not a real one, he is getting paid for it.
➥ and you did hire him for a completely service next day, your heart start beating faster and you couldn’t help but spend some hours preparing the perfect set of clothes to impress axel. something that is both casual, yet classy to give him the impression that you aren’t desperate for this nor that you never had a properly relationship before, nah, you are just trying to forget about your exe (at least that what you’ve told in your bio).
➥ once the day finally arrives, you put the best clothes from your wardrobe and waits for axel to show up at the cafe where the date will be set. sitting next to the glass window, taking a sip your favorite drink, he arrives. the redhead boy sit in front of you with that smile on the face, already acting and analyzing you from head and toes, oh god. he is even handsome in person!
➥ the date start so good! he is truly a gentleman with his manner and his acting is amazing, the way he holds your hand at every moment and how he pays attention in whatever you are talking is more than enough to make you blush. you feel lucky to have hired a guy like him, he truly makes the experience feels to real that you ended paying him more just to stay a little longer than you planned at first, and of course, he made it worth it.
➥ when his job was done, axel walked you back home despite not having do it, but he did and even hold your hand in the way. he said it’s to protect you from any possible danger or guy that might try to flirt with you, making you blush more and more (his plan is working!). once you got home, he kissed your forehead and waited until you got inside to leave with that smile of his, happy that everything is working out perfectly.
➥ to you, he is the perfect boyfriend that you always wish to have since the very moment you learn about romance, that’s why you are going to hire him more. and to axel, you are more than willingly to pay more than usual just to him pretending to be your boyfriend, aren’t you a little silly? you must be really lonely to have hired him from that stupid site, but he isn’t complaining, after all, you are the one paying him.
➥ then more and more dates happen, axel pretending to be your boyfriend while you began to truly falling in love with him, completely forgetting that he is just with you for the money and ranks of the enterprise he is part of, yet it’s easy to notice that you believe that axel is in love with you, that he will stop being a rent-a-boyfriend to become your real boyfriend. so you propose it to him after many dates, only to be rejected.
➥ his laughs are tormenting your mind and his words are unforgettable. you really thought that i loved you? you are so funny, [name] and quite pathetic too. do you really thought that i would stay with you if wasn’t the amount of money you spend on me? you are delusional for thinking that you are worth of my love. with that, you ended the contract with axel and leaves him immediately with tears ruining your makeup and clothes. he expected that you would apologize to him, but no, you blocked him from your social medias and deleted the photos that you posted with him. despite being his highest paying client, axel moved on to others clients and you moved on to find someone else.
➥ a couple of weeks passed and he couldn’t stop thinking about you at all. the expression you gave him whatever he would surprise you, the small gifts you gave him that he always wanted and the kisses you two share when it was his time to leave. why is thinking about it? you were just a client like everyone else, but why you are in his mind? he needs to stop thinking about you. so he began taking even more to job in an attempt to forget you.
➥ it was working until he catch a glimpse of you during one his job, you are serving tables at a expensive restaurant that his date asked to come and there are visible marks of dark undertones beneath your eyes. did something happened to you? he wants to ask it, but that would ruin the date and he won’t get his payment, so he keeps to himself and tries to pay attention on the woman that hired him.
➥ at some point of the date, he excused himself to go the bathroom, where he got hear some faint sounds coming from the kitchen and of course, he wanted to check it. there, he saw you hugging another coworker of yours in tears and your voice broken him, the way you spoke to your friend about being stupid enough to think that you are worth of love and how you are never going to fall in love again. axel knew that he did hurt you, but never expected it to hurt you so much to make you feel horrible…he needed to apologize.
➥ after his date, axel wait for you at the back doors and as expected, you were there, but weren’t alone. there is another guy standing next to you, someone he recall to be another waiter of the restaurant, someone who is too close of you with a arm around your waist. you replaced him? no, you can’t do it. axel began to talk, at least try, about his mistake and how he will repay for all the things you did for him, he even knee on the ground to ask for your forgiveness for his acts.
➥ it’s embarrassing that he is asking forgiveness from someone he treated like trash, but axel has to do it to beg for your forgiveness and to get back together with him, this time to become a real couple til their last breath on earth. i know that i was an idiot, a fucking horrible person and that y-you deserve someone better than me, but i promise that i have changed to be someone better just for you! let me become your boyfriend, a real one this time and then we get married one day , have a family if you want and grown old together. and he spoken even more til he loses his voice.
➥ you didn’t speak, not able to talk for hearing so much of axel’s rambling, but you did slap him harder. he is acting like he is the victim in this situation and that made you yell at him for a couple of minutes til you were done. the emotion you put in your voice made axel cry of guilt and once you left him along your friend, the redhead began rethinking about the ‘relationship’ you two shared weeks ago. it was so perfect and he ruined that.
➥ after that, axel began stalking you in his free time and leaving gifts for you in your doorsteps, hoping that you would accept his handwriting notes full of apologies and money, only to be left devastated when you didn’t even bother open the letter and throw it away in the trash. but he didn’t give up, no, he still has hope to change your heart and accept him once again.
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@moonit3 writings
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islesnucks · 2 months
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𝓿𝓸𝓲𝓬𝓮𝓶𝓪𝓲𝓵 - Mathew Barzal x Reader
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Summary: what started as an accidentall voicemial to your ex boyfriend ended up becoming routine and maybe even more TW: none that i can think of
Word count: 3.9k A/N: completely made up game schedule btw
Masterlist Add yoruself to the taglist if you wanna be notified when i post the fic!
-
“Hey, it’s Mat.” His voice echoed through the phone, so familiar yet strangely distant now. You’d heard him speak in interviews, but this was different. He was addressing you, or at least the voicemail version of you. “I can’t answer right now, so you know what to do.”
You didn’t know what to do. Calling your ex-boyfriend, the one you had broken up with months ago, wasn’t something you had exactly planned. Yet, when the acceptance email for the program you had worked tirelessly for arrived, the one he had witnessed you pour your heart into, he was the person you wanted to share it with. So that’s what you were doing, trying no to overthink it before nerves got the best of you.
“Mat, hi. This is so random—H-how are you?” Thank God he didn’t answer, you were a stuttering mess leaving a voicemail imagine if it had been him on the other end instead. “I got in! Into the program I mean. I don’t know why, but I wanted to tell you. You helped me so much before—” you cut yourself again. It didn’t feel right to mention the break up like that, but what could you say? Before I broke up with you? Before I stumbled out of your apartment leaving you behind without an explanation?
“Fuck it. I can’t do this.” You pulled your phone away from your ear and touched the red dot.
That’s it. He didn’t need to know, he probably wouldn’t even care. Who would want their ex to call to tell them they were doing great? That maybe after all the breakup was worth it because they had gotten into the program they had neglected their relationship for? Too long, right?
A second later, realization struck like lightning – you had ended the call before deleting the voicemail. It had been sent.
“Oh no, no, no!” you exclaimed, eyes widening in horror. There was no turning back. Mat would undoubtedly hear you stumbling over your words. Why couldn’t you have just left well enough alone? The last thing he needed was you barging back into his life with a pathetic voicemail about something he likely moved on from. ‘He probably already despises me after how everything unfolded, and now this’ you thought.
You were wrong, because no longer than 5 minutes after everything had gone down your phone was buzzing in your hand, Mat’s contact bright in the center as he now waited for you to pick up for a change.
“Mat.” you picked up.
“Hey. You called me?” He sounded confused, for very obvious reasons. Nevertheless it was nice to hear his voice now directed at you.
“Yeah, right. I left you a voicemail.” You rolled your eyes. At least you sounded less nervous than earlier on the voicemail, but it was not less embarrassing.
Mat’s voice came through, cool and collected. “Oh, sorry, I didn’t check. I just saw the missed call and, you know.”
“Sure, sure.” you replied, trying to sound half as calm as he seemed to be with the whole situation.
“Do you want me to hear it or …” his offer hovered in the air.
“No! I mean, I can tell you.” You cringed at the thought of him hearing your rambling voicemail. “So, I called because I just got the mail. I got into the program!”
“Shut up! That’s great! Congratulations!” Mat’s excitement burst through the line. Your heart melted a little. After everything that had happened he sounded genuinely happy for you.
“Thank you, Maty.”
Mat’s tone softened. “You deserve it, after all the hard work you put into it. I knew you’d get it.”
You chuckled, the tension easing. “I know, I know. You told me like a million times. I was just insecure.”
For a second you let yourself imagine this was under other circumstances. You were still together and he was calling you right after practice or from another city in one of his roadies. He’d come back home eventually and hug you so tight you wouldn’t be able to breath, probably lift you up and spin you around a little. You wouldn’t be able to stop laughing and-
“I know …” Mat’s response brought you back to reality. The reality in which he wouldn’t knock on your door with his arms wide open.
His tone carried an easy understanding. He definitely knew about your insecurities. They played a huge role on why your relationship was the way it was right now: nonexistent.
“So that’s what the voicemail said?” He broke the silence.
“Yeah, basically. But you know, all giddy and stuff. Really embarrassing.”
Mat’s laughter grew louder, and you could practically see him shaking his head. “Oh, really? Well, now I have to hear it.”
“No, no, no.” you protested, your embarrassment deepening. “Seriously, don’t Barzal. I know where you live.”
But Mat insisted, his curiosity piqued. “Come on! Embrace the cringe. It can’t be that bad.”
He ended the call before you could object anymore, only to call you back a minute later. Mat’s laughter erupted again as soon as you picked up, and you couldn’t help but join in, the shared humor dissipating the lingering awkwardness. If you closed your eyes you could almost picture him with that scrunched up nose as he laughed.
“The ‘fuck it, i can’t do this’ was the best part by far.”
-
The familiar buzz of the MSG postgame show filled the cozy confines of your living room as Mat’s name flashed brightly on your phone, catching you off guard. Shannon and Hickey were in full praise mode, replaying Mat’s epic goal on loop, and there he was, the main attraction, waiting on the other end of the line for you to pick up.
You fumbled for your phone, a grin tugging at the corners of your lips as you swiped to answer. “Hey, I didn’t expect your call.” you remarked, the commentator’s voices still ringing in your ears.
“Bad timing?” Mat’s voice crackled through the phone, a hint of breathlessness underscoring his words – probably still riding the adrenaline high from the ice.
“No, no. It’s just that a second ago you were on my screen falling all over the ice.” you teased, imagining his less-than-graceful moments on the rink.
“I don’t fall that much!” he argued, sounding mildly offended.
“You do, but you also score, so it’s forgiven. Congrats on your almost hatty, by the way.” You chuckled, knowing how much he loathed falling a goal short. Always so hard on himself. 
Mat scoffed, clearly annoyed at missing the mark. “So, you watched tonight?”
“Obviously, I watch every game I can catch.” you replied, the excitement of the game still coursing through your veins. The thrill of watching Mat succeed, even from a distance, even after all that happened, was undeniable.
“You should come, you know. I’m sure the girls would love to see you.” Mat suggested, his voice tinged with a hint of longing.
“I don’t know, Mat. It’s not my place anymore.” you hesitated, letting the uncertainty hang in the air. You had to change the subject before your mind started spiraling.  “Anyway, why did you call?”
“Oh, right. I listened to your voicemail again!”
“So you called to tell me you haven’t actually deleted it like you promised?”
“I heard it right before the game and got 2 goals and 2 assists. I think it’ll become my new pregame ritual, honestly.” Mat admitted, his voice softer now, laced with a hint of nostalgia. Why had he chosen to hear it? That’s something he would save for himself for now. The shared memories of your past flitted between you, unspoken but palpable.
“Really? Want me to send embarrassing voicemails before every game?”
“I’d love it. Yes, please.” Mat replied with a laugh, the warmth of his laughter washing over you like a comforting embrace. The playful banter held a certain intimacy, a bridge between past flames and the uncharted territory of what lay ahead.
The banter flowed seamlessly, a blend of shared history and the current moment. The familiarity was comforting, but the unspoken complexities of your past lingered in the air, a delicate tension.
-
NYI vs. TBL - November 5th
“Hey, Barzy. I don’t know if you were joking or not but here’s your pregame embarrassing voicemail as solicited. You weren’t serious, right? Well fuck it, enjoy it or ignore me whatever.”
NYI vs. CGY - November 7th
“Just walked past that coffee shop where we had our third or fourth date I think. Remember how you choked over your latte when I lied and said I loved the Rangers?”
NYI vs. SEA - November 9th
“Hey, you won’t believe who I just saw. That guy that lives in the building across the street, the one that has your face tattooed on his left arm. He asked about you, told me to wish you good luck. So good luck from him … and from me. Good luck tonight.”
NYI vs. VAN - November 11th
“Hi! Your sister told me your family is going tonight, so send them a kiss from me, ok? … I-I keep in touch with her, I don’t know if you knew that or like maybe I should’ve told you? Are you ok with that? I’m sorry I just assumed you would be. Anyway, good luck! Say hi from me! Or don’t if you don’t want to-”
NYI vs. NYR - November 16th
“Dude. Rangers tonight. Don’t mess it up. May have bet on you guys with a guy from work, I don’t wanna have to pay for his lunch tomorrow. Please. Good luck, 13.”
NYI vs. PIT - November 18th
“Shit, shit, shit. Hope you can hear this before the game. I’m still getting used to the program’s schedule and all of that, I’m kind of a mess right now. Anyway, good luck!”
NYI vs. DET - November 20th
“Maty, hi! I know this is kind of dumb because I saw you like 10 minutes ago and I’m in the building but still thought I should leave the voicemail just in case. (Come on!) Ok I have to go, Sydney has a tone of gossip to catch me up on. Good luck!”
NYI vs. DAL - November 23th
“Hello Mr Barzal, I won’t be able to watch tonight, but still good luck! Even if you don’t win, I hope you score a goal, make an assist. That 8 game point streak you have going on is insane. I think I’ll start charging you for this if they are working so well.Good luck Barzy!”
NYI vs. STL - November 26th
“Hey! First of all, good luck! Second, I left my scarf at the Lee’s last night. It’s red, I was wearing it when you picked me up. Grace said Anders would give it to you tonight. Maybe we can meet for coffee tomorrow so you can give it back? Anyway, good luck!”
NYI vs. CHI - November 28th
“13, hello! I don’t have anything funny to tell you today so just good luck! Love you- shit, sorry. Habit I guess. Bye.”
NYI vs. NYR - November 30th
“You have zero new voicemails. To record a new personal greeting press one-”
-
You tried everything to get your mind off it, but it wasn’t working. The cup of tea was now cold in your hand and you couldn’t even pretend to care what was going on in the movie you had playing on your tv. The game had ended an hour ago but it was on replay in your mind.
It was silly to think it was your fault. You couldn’t influence the score of the match, the 5-1 loss against the Rangers wasn’t on you. However the outcome would’ve been different if their starplayer hadn’t been taking stupid penalties, losing the puck, causing turnovers. That could be on you partially.
The bell ringing caught you by surprise, almost dropping the cold tea. You got up to answer, even though you had a feeling you knew who was waiting by your building’s door.
“Hello?”
“It’s me.” The familiar voice needed no introduction.
“Mat? What are you doing here?” 
“Buzz me in.” he requests, and you could practically hear the determination in his tone. With a resigned sigh, you pressed the buzzer, knowing full well he wouldn’t leave until he got what he came for.
A few moments later, a knock sounded at the door, and you found yourself face to face with him. Determination was bright in his eyes, your heart started racing.
“What’s going on?” He rolled his eyes, clearly not impressed by your attempt at pretending not to know why he’s there.
“You didn’t leave a voicemail.” Mat strided in without waiting for an invitation, and the unspoken tension was palpable.
“Right, that. I guess I forgot. Sorry.” you lied, trying to sound convincing but knowing there’s no use, he’d know. You closed the door behind him almost instinctively, as if shutting out the forthcoming emotional storm that’s about to break in your apartment.
“You’ve been sending me a voicemail before every single game for the past month.” he remarked, his gaze keenly picking up on your avoidance. Frustration started to take over. He already had been in this position before, begging you for explanations and all you did was look away. “Please, don’t shut me out. Not again.”
“I got confused, okay? Why are we doing this? I’m your ex-girlfriend, I broke up with you, Mat. And now I’m going to your games and sending you voicemails every game? What even is this?”
At some point you started walking all over the living room, the distress was clear. Mat was better at hiding it, he stood still by the door like he had been since he walked in, but you could see his hands fidgeting. Neither of you had a clear head to take on what was about to come, chaos was inevitable.
“I don’t know, but I thought you liked this. I thought it was like an inside joke, our own thing.”
“It was that. But you’re not supposed to have that with your ex.” you said, trying to emphasize the last word for him, as if a reminder of your status would help the situation in any way. 
“We’re friends?” He furrowed his brows, and, had it not been for the situation you were in, you would’ve laughed at the way even he sounded so unsure of what he was saying.
“Mat, come on. It’s confusing, I know I was getting confused. It started with the voicemails, which was already something, but then we’re talking every day, I’m going to your games again and team’s gatherings, we’re hanging out again. I said ‘I love you’ on my last one!” You finally looked at him, baring it all. There was only one solution in your mind and it had to be taken no matter the pain it would undoubtedly cost you. “I think it’s better if we stop.”
There was a moment of silence, he looked at you as if trying to read through the wall you were hiding behind. Trying to decipher if it was you speaking or your insecurities had taken over again. Most importantly, trying to figure out if this time he had what it took to get to you before he lost you.
“I don’t want it to stop.” he said, determination clear in his voice. In a second he closed the gap between you. The proximity caught you off guard, you couldn’t remember the last time you were this close. “Tell me you don’t feel anything.” It sounded almost like a beg, but he didn’t care.
“We broke up.” you insisted, trying to sound all resolute.
“You broke up with me.” he corrected you, his gaze holding steady, slicing through your defenses.
“We weren’t working, Mat! We could barely see each other, and when we did, we were too tired or stressed. We fought a lot. We broke up.” It sounded almost childish the way you stubbornly persisted on it, like you needed to reassure yourself more than him how things had played out last time.
“Couples fight sometimes; it’s normal. I was stressed about the playoffs, and you were stressed about getting into the program. It was a bad moment, yes, but that’s over.”
“Other problems are gonna come up.”
“We can face them together, we fight and make up. That’s it, that’s how couples work.”
You paused for a second, it made no sense to keep on repeating yourself. It seemed like he had a solution for every obstacle you presented. He had come here for answers, it was time to give them to him even if you were answering older already forgotten questions.
“I was scared, Mat. I was scared and insecure, and it felt like I was ruining it all.” Tears start rolling down your face and there’s nothing he wants more than to hug you, keep you close to his chest, push the pain away; but he knows he shouldn’t. You’re finally letting down your guard, telling him what he’s been dying to hear for months; he has to give you space to be vulnerable. “I thought it was better to break things up before they got really nasty.” your voice wobbled.
“I get it, I really do. But you could’ve told me and I should’ve been more present, not left you alone to deal with our problems. We could’ve tried to make it work. ” He looked deep into your eyes, his own reflecting a mix of understanding and unwavering love. “I know I loved you more than enough to work through it.”
“I’m so sorry. I’m sorry about how I ended things, and I’m sorry about the voicemail and all the mess I’ve caused.” You tried to walk away from him, the proximity being too much, but he caught your arm making you face him once again.
Tears started streaming down his face as you tried to grapple with the weight of your own decisions. He looked you in the eyes, the determination from earlier is still there, even behind the tears those glossy eyes told you he wasn’t gonna leave in silence like last time. This time he had to leave it all out, even if he ended up hurt in the process.
“When you first called me I was too nervous to answer so I let it go to voicemail. I think even then I knew it wasn’t over for me, I knew hearing your voice would bring it all back.” You winced, acutely aware of the emotional turmoil you’ve caused. What you didn’t know was he wasn’t worried about pain coming back; what worried him was all the love he had for you and had pushed away after the break up coming back and once again not having where to put it.
“But then I wanted to hear you, the real you, not the voicemail, so I called you. I cannot tell you how happy it made me to hear you, like my heart was beating again after months of numbness. And you were telling me this great news, when you got that acceptance letter you wanted to tell me.” he continued, and you released a heavy breath, a half-smile forming on your face. He was right, the first person you wanted to share your triumph with was him, you hadn’t thought much about it back then but no it was so clear.
“I replayed your voicemail before the game that first time because I wanted to hear your voice. I didn’t realize how much I missed it until I heard you over the phone earlier that day, and all I wanted was to hear you again talking to me.” he confessed, a mixture of vulnerability and longing in his words. “At first I thought maybe I was making it up, you know? Maybe it was just my unresolved feelings, maybe there was nothing going on. But you called me first and then you kept on sending the voicemails. Things were going back to the way they were before. It felt like I was me again, like we were us again.”
Mat smiled thinking how everyone could notice; his friends, his teammates, his family, everyone could see the old Mat was back. He told them off, too afraid to consider you were all he was missing because he knew he didn’t have you back, not yet.
His hand gently cupped your face, sending a shiver down your spine. Closing your eyes, you leaned into his touch. You missed it, there was no denying it anymore. You missed it all too much—his touch, his voice, his energy, his very presence. Him.
“You said ‘I love you’ on the last voicemail. I replayed it like 20 times at least, just to hear those three words. From you, to me.” The weight of those three words hung in the air between the two of you after so long, it was electrifying. Your heart raced; he was about to say it, and you yearned to hear it.
“I love you.” he declared, and there was no ambiguity this time. It wasn’t a recall of your words; this time, it was his confession to you.
“Maty…” was all you managed to say; his nickname laden with tenderness and echoes of old fears that still lingered.
“I want this. I want you even if I can only see you two times a week and even if half that time you are studying or working or stressing over both. I want to be there with you. I want to fight and make up. I want all of it, the messy and ugly included.”
“I love you.” you finally whispered.
It was over. He loved you, you loved him, and there was nothing left to say.
In that breath-holding moment, he leaned down, his lips finally touching yours. It’s not just a kiss; it’s a wild ride through forgiveness, longing, and the silent agreement to dive back into the messy and the beautiful, hand in hand. He was smiling into the kiss, so were you. The taste of salt from their tears lingered, mingling with the sweetness of the moment. The kiss spoke of second chances and the magic of beginnings, a promise to rewrite the story that had once unraveled.
You pulled away, breathless and teary-eyed, yet a radiant joy painted across your faces. You laughed, a melody of relief and newfound hope. One of his hands was on your back as the other traveled from your face to the back of your head, pulling you against his chest. Your arms hugged his torso tight.
“I love you.” he mumbled against your head before placing a kiss on top.
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NYI vs. MTL - December 1st
“Hey! Good luck tonight babe-”
“I don’t think it counts if I’m literally next to you when you record it.”
“Shush. Who’s the voicemail expert here? Me. Anyway, as I was saying before you interrupted me: good luck tonight, I love you.”
“I love you too.”
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soooooo it’s here! hope you like it! like and reblogs are always appreciated!
it felt so good to write again and to share it too, hope i have more time this year to write more stuff
taglist:
@glassdanse @2manytabsopen @barbienoturbby @sweetlittlegingy @mcsteamylove98 @ttylfedora @chieflawyerpastatoad @iwantahockeyhimbo @fallinallincurls @jordiee95 @heatherawoowoo @barzysreputation @farabeezers @4ambagelbites @matwith1t @audryaho @maximoff-xmen @astrydis @joelsfarabees @bitchforbarzy @deloughrey @brias1201 @besthockeyfics @ya-pucking-nerd @hoiyheadharpies @mckenna4 @rosesvioletshardy @hockeyunits @siriusly-parker @ilyasorokinn @lam-ila @boqvistsbabe @theycallmecassie @ephemeral371 @hal3ynicol3 @angelblooddevil @besthockeyfics @beauvertime @picked-off-by-barzal @1316 @cherrygirl1229 @lunabean @random-readers-world @poufsouffle21 @barzysbaby @matbarzal13 @alwaysclassyeagle @wanbach23 @evaggreendaily
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madame-fear · 9 months
Note
You can write headcanons about Lucerys, Jacaerys, Aemond and Aegon when is pregnant wife gets hurt (maybe she falls or bumps into something or someone)
𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐃 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐒 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐀 𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐆𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐓!𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐒 𝐇𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐒│𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒
— pairing : aegon targaryen ii x pregnant!reader, aemond targaryen x pregnant!reader, jacaerys velaryon x pregnant!reader, lucerys velaryon x pregnant!reader.
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ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ Aegon Targaryen II :
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: ̗̀➛ Aegon would just go hysterical when he finds out you got harmed while being pregnant with his child.
: ̗̀➛ You might be the first woman he ever truly loved. The one that comforted him in every occassion, that truly understands him, supports him - and now, you are with his child. It would be too much for him if anything was to ever happen to you, or your child.
: ̗̀➛ If anyone was the cause of your injuries, being a bit hysterical, he would be absolutely ruthless. Without hesitating, he would probably just smash the persons head either against a wall, or against a table, just like he did with Lucerys when he returned to King’s Landing and they all fought.
: ̗̀➛ ^^ And saying he would only get this phsyically aggresive with the person is truly an understatement. Just expect him to make the persons life a living hell, and then he would go to you like a worried little puppy.
: ̗̀➛ Aegon could have just overreacted a little bit, as you turned out to be okay, but he can’t just act careless when something happens to you. Sweet boy would just praise you a bit too much, rambling about how worried he was. Please just hold this pathetic man in your arms and tell him you are, and will always be okay.
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ Aemond Targaryen :
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: ̗̀➛ This boy is a bit more reserved when it comes to showing his emotions. I think Aemond would just keep a straight, stern expression even if he’s panicking on the inside.
: ̗̀➛ First things first. When he meets the maester and you in your chamber because you are getting your health checked, Aemond would surely speak to the maester first and hear what he has to say about your accident.
: ̗̀➛ You did get a bit harmed, some bruises, but nothing too serious that could potentially harm you or the child. So, you could definitely notice him release a deep huff of relief, and his body would become a bit less 'stiff'.
: ̗̀➛ Afterwards, when you finally get to be alone together, Aemond would just tell you to be more careful. Not because he thinks you’re clumsy, or because he’s scolding you - but rather, because he can’t bear the thought of losing the possibility of forming a family with you, the love of his life. Aem just cares too much, and has his own ways of showing his love.
: ̗̀➛ Either way, he will just stay by your side, comforting you for the little fright you got. Tons of kisses and smooches, plus sweet whispers of how good of a mother you will be.
: ̗̀➛ However, if someone bumped, or even worse, pushed you, fear not. Vhagar will take good care of it, without you having to even find out what happened, or worrying about anything. Do expect to have him as your little private stalker, following you around or keeping an eye on you everywhere just to make sure you will always be okay, without you knowing.
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ Jacaerys Velaryon :
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: ̗̀➛ Jace will bomb you with questions as soon as he hears you got hurt while being pregnant. Concerned questions that... Overwhelm you a bit. Unlike Aemond, none of the two Velaryon boys would bother in hiding their worry over your health.
: ̗̀➛ Questions like: are you okay? What happened? Did you fall with something? Did someone bump into you? Are you feeling dizzy? Has a maester seen you already? What did the maester say? Is the babe alright?
: ̗̀➛ He just asks too much, to the point you can barely respond to his questions properly. But, you understand. Much like Aemond, ever since he found out you were to be parents together, he became even more overprotective of you than usual.
: ̗̀➛ Jace would immediatly take hold of your hands and sit by your side while you await for the maester to arrive, and he will attentively listen to you answering his questions.
: ̗̀➛ Of course, the babe was alright and so were you. Luckily there was no harm made. Either way, if someone bumped into you instead of you falling, Jace needs to know who it was just in case that person did it on purpose.
: ̗̀➛ ^ gods, his face would literally twitch in anger at the thought of it.
: ̗̀➛ And if someone did bump into you on purpose? Jace wouldnt be reluctant in finding them, and getting physical. But of course, after spending time by your side with a relieved, content expression on his face.
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ Lucerys Velaryon :
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: ̗̀➛ The second Luke is informed that you hurt yourself, sweet boy would immediatly drop whatever thing he is doing just to rush to stay by your side, holding your hand and filling your face with concerned kisses.
: ̗̀➛ The idea of being the father to your children is something he can’t get enough of; so knowing you either fell/bumped into someone just leaves him at the verge of a panic attack.
: ̗̀➛ Will ask you a thousand of times if you’re okay, how are you feeling, and will also make sure to bring the best maesters to check on your and the child’s wellbeing.
: ̗̀➛ Of course, nothing bad happened. It was just a clumsy little moment, and both you and the babe are doing more than excellent. Literally, it was just a little spook.
: ̗̀➛ Either way, Lucerys will insist on staying by your side and just showering you and your precious little baby with his endless love.
: ̗̀➛ Basically, you’re his top priority. No matter what the situation was, Luke will always make sure to check on both of your wellbeing first, before having a talk about being more careful around you with whomever bumped into you (if, for example, you bumped into someone).
: ̗̀➛ Little love dragon would be EXTREMELY concerned the moment he finds out you got hurt, but oh, his face will turn into a relieved and joyful one when both of his treasures are alright. Maybe will also turn a bit more overprotective than he already is. As long as you are alright, he would pay no mind to the rest of the world. Luke would just rather stay with you, and your child. 💜💙
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♡ taglist : ♡
@damatheirin @jacesvelaryons @jjamieberry @anemicroyalcore @countsmoon @tickle-euphoria @beeebo234 @manuholland6 @capellaadara @kyuupidwrites @tchatso @dopepersonacloudllama @phantasyy @tasty-nutella @mstxdes @valeriecash @cookielovesbook-akie @zzz000eee @bellarkeselection @feliuuuksks @visenyacore @hannaroktj @hopelesswritergall @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @dragon430
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scruus · 10 months
Text
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★̶̲ [ 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 ]
✎ sub afab howl + dom amab reader notes: masturbation, dirty thoughts, self degradation, sprinkle of exhibitionism, howl being a slut; nobody ask me how and where this came from just no. Also tell me if u guys want a part 2.
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Howl softly moans in the quiet lavender smelling air surrounding him. Filthy sounds of squelching and groaning were accompanying his lonely self in the room.
It wasn’t a good idea you know. Legs wide apart, slick running down his glistening hole and his clit all puffy. This was actually very bad. You could come in at any moment right now.
What if you were with a group of friends? like you were sometimes when you get drunk at your office parties. They could walk in on to their friend’s boyfriend fingering himself on the living room couch. Spread open like some hungry whore and offering up a view to everyone?
You would maybe then fuck him in front of everyone? Bounce him on your thick cock and show everyone how his sweet little cunt swallows you all up. Letting everyone see how you breed his hole until his tummy bulges and the cum gushes out of his abused hole and he just moans like a needy bitch, pleading for more.
Or you could come home alone? All tired, angry, stressed. So frustrated with your work and deadlines. Maybe seeing him like this would make you take your anger out on him. Fuck him so hard he loses his voice next day and he gets reduced to a moaning slut.
You wont even be gentle to him. Treating him like a ragdoll and just tearing him open without any prep. Your tip probing his cervix and his entire body spasming as he cums again and again and again. In so deep, your balls slap against his pussy lips. Roughing him up until he can’t even think. Break him apart.
“ffuck….”, howl softly whimpers. He rarely swears unless it’s something that riles him up. And these thoughts are definitely doing that. So pathetic, he mocks himself.
All these scenario running through his pretty little mind as he plunges his fingers deep. In and out trying to hit that spot inside which you always find in less than a second. Obviously you did! After all you had explored each nook and cranny of his beautiful body.
His slender waist and that soft beautiful stomach which you always pepper down with kisses. His pink perky nipples which you love to suck on and bite with your teeth. His cute soft moans that you adore when you kiss along his jaw and down his neck. And his hair? Oh his hair…. Soft and so luscious. You love smelling it every morning when he wakes up cuddled in your arms.
And you also love to pull on it when you raw dog him from behind. Watching that ass jiggle up and down and your cum covered cock just sliding inside of him so easily. His glassy eyes staring up at you with hearts as he babbles “kiss me” nonsensically. He remembered how hard he came that night. Just squirting so much that a huge patch of the bed was wet.
His pussy takes you in so well, it has to, he doesn’t care if he has to force it in. He loves having your cock deep inside his warm walls. Just ramming into him like a fucking machine and making him feel all dizzy and weak.
“oh oh fuck oh a-am close”, howl’s eyes flutter shut as his fingers pick up pace and the coil in his stomach tightens. His toes curl and his hand moves down to clench at the sofa. Shit shit shit, he will cum but the thought saddens him that it will be an orgasm without your dick inside him.
Rambling your name, his moans get desperate. Oh god he was so close. He wants your hands on you. Wants to feel the burn of his pretty cunt trying to take in your shaft. Even though he has fucked you so many times, his pussy still can’t acknowledge the fact that you are so fucking huge and he loves that.
I guess being a wizard comes with its perks.
And just before he can scream your name and rush to a climax. The door of his apartment clicks open and enters a tired yet happy figure he was yearning to see all day.
“Honey you won’t believe what happ-“, you stop dead in your tracks. Eyes wide open as you stare at your lover seated on the gray couch of your living room. The TV’s light shining on him but the sound muted.
His fingers were buried between his fleshy folds and his tender, plushy thighs had his fluids running down. “H-howl…..don’t tell me you were masturbating in the living room?”, you croak, astonished at just how fucking horny your boyfriend is.
Howl chuckles out a giggle, eyes hooded with lust as a wet tongue swipes across his bottom lip. He takes out his fingers from his hole and spreads his pussy lips apart. Showing off his cute cunt and the gaping hole he wished you would just fill in right now.
“I was waiting for you”, he grins before beckoning you with his clean set of fingers. “Wanna fuck this whorish cunt up? Huh Daddy?”
Part 2?
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mrswint3rs · 4 months
Note
I can't write well but just an idea that I find hot. Totally didn't imagen that.
After the end of RE5. He survived barely. Injured pretty badly but recovering.
Reader taking such good care of him. Since he can't properly do it himself.
Maybe reader could help him relax ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
~horny for Wesker anon
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In a Time of Need
a/n- im in love with this idea oml ty anon.
pairings- Albert Wesker x Gn! reader
NSFW WARNING:
contains- oral sex (m!receiving), handjob, edging, Wesker refers to himself as ‘master’ once, riding Wesker while he’s immobile (consensually), praise/degrading, and use of pet names as always 𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
In his weaker state, Wesker is now a shadow of his former self. He's a broken man who has lost everything. He relies on you to take care of him, to feed him, and to keep him comfortable. You're the one who keeps him alive and protects him. You're the one who has the power to make his life better or worse. You have him entirely in your hands.
It used to be the other way around.
He's been reduced to a mere specimen and can't even protest that. He's completely silent, with the only sound being the heavy pumping of his heart. There's a feeling of hopelessness and self-pity surrounding him.
He won’t admit it, but he’s grateful for your presence. Despite how rough he treated you before, and how often he belittled you. You stuck by his side. Even more so when he was as pathetic like this You never seemed to think any less of him.
No matter the failure or wrongdoings, you held Wesker in high regard. You looked up to him as a superior being.
Even now, as you have to be the one to nurse him. Constantly tending to his slow healing wounds and practically spoon feeding him.
Wesker was never one to accept weakness and having to rely on someone else for basic things like eating and sleeping is infuriating for him. He doesn't understand how this has happened and doesn't want to admit that he is weak and vulnerable. He still has his pride and isn't ready to accept the fact that he needs someone to take care of him. He struggles against it every chance he gets, but deep down he understands he has no other options but to comply.
Daily, you have to tend to his bandages and open cuts to prevent further problems like infection.
Cleaning Wesker's wounds is no easy task. They are deep and painful and he doesn't like you touching or inspecting them. He's in so much pain, it's hard for him to even breathe. He clenches his jaw and squeezes his eyes shut, but not enough to hide the pain he's in. He curses softly each time you touch him, his wounds raw and red, but slowly healing under the care and attention of your hands.
“Sorry…” You offer a timid apology as you carefully change the gauze, a slight tremble in your hands betraying your concern that you may inadvertently cause discomfort to him.
"It didn't hurt that much." Wesker peers down at you with a mixture of frustration and sadness in his eyes. "Just finish up quickly."
You finish cleaning the wound and apply a fresh bandage to it. Wesker stays silent and stoic as you work, but you know he's in pain and only tolerating this. He's still glaring at you and even if you're doing your best to avoid hurting him, your final touches are making him flinch a little.
"Are you finished?" he grumbles under his breath. You can tell he's trying not to make a fuss, but he clearly wants to be done with this.
You give a reassuring nod in response as you tape up the loose ends. “Are you hungry still?” you ask cautiously. “Need anything before bed?”
"No." he says firmly, not willing to show any neediness or rely on you for anything else.
Part of him did want to be alone, but being around you made him feel slightly better.
Maybe because of your constant need to dote on him. He may have changed but you didn’t. In a sense, you were still basically his lap dog. It fed into that unquenchable thirst for control that he had. You did everything in your power to please him without a second thought.
You could see clear as day how much he was suffering. More than just external wounds inflicted pain.
The poor man was cooped up in bed, unable to accomplish any of the ideals he had thoroughly planned and tried for. Of course you could tell he was stressed. Anyone would be. For Wesker, that stress was eating him alive. He could hardly face you, utterly embarrassed at the state he was forced into. It wasn’t supposed to turn out this way. He wasn’t supposed to sink so low.
But, you knew exactly what was needed to boost him back up, at least somewhat close to his norm.
As you finish cleaning up, you decide to let your hand roam. Avoiding the injured areas of skin, you delicately slide your hand between his leg. Your soft palm trails the inside of his thighs and his tired eyes flicker to you in surprise. “I don’t want another useless massage.” he cuts in.
“I was thinking of doing a little bit more than that for you today.” you counter in a question like statement. “I think certain areas may be feeling neglected lately.”
Wesker picks up on the innuendo, his mood shifting immediately as you state your suggestion.
“Oh?” his thin lips start to curve into that all knowing grin. “Well then, be my guest.”
He certainly wasn’t going to deny you. The man hadn’t been touched for way longer than he anticipated. He was far too busy for things like this.
He almost forgot how good it could feel.
As your hand glides over his hardening length through the tight fabric of his pants, he jerks on impulse, letting out a throaty groan. He was way more sensitive than you anticipated, but you weren’t complaining.
You slowly stroke him through the material and its enough to send him into shock. The heat pools between his legs at the contact of your hands, the discomfort of his injuries fade into nothing.
To your convenience, he lifts as best he can, letting you strip him of his coverings. His cock stands tall and proud, the vein leading from tip to base steadily twitching.
He watches your every move as you spit into the center of your hand.
His eyes snap shut as you then use it to pump your hand, caressing the whole length, soft and breathy moans pour from his lips at his sensitivity.
“Fuck…just like that. Don’t you dare stop.” he barks out an order, yet he can’t sound as stern with you as usual. Not when you ball your palm over the tip, twisting and squeezing your way around.
He can hardly sit still, as much as he tries.
When your mouth comes into play, kissing softly down his happy trail. Your lip’s envelop him into your warm welcoming hole, his hand entangles in your hair.
The way you flick your tongue as you go is enough to kill him.
His whole body tenses. You take him all the way into your throat without cause for concern, slobbering all sloppy all over the base of his cock as you hold it there.
Wesker feels himself about to cum already. But so do you. So you part ways as fast as you can as you feel that pulsing, leaving him unfinished.
Or so he thought that’s what you were doing until you began to pull your own pants down.
His hands remove themselves from your locks, resting at his side as he waits for whatever it is you were planning. His eyes, half slit, watch your every step, looking you up and down as you strip for him. He tried his best to be patient, but he needed that release. More than anything.
“Come here,” he commands firmly, the frustration evident in his tone. “Now.” You would never deny him, not that you planned on it.
You straddle him, careful not to do any harm.
Sitting now on his lap, you position his hardness between the plush of your thighs. Your hands start to stroke him again, but the rough grip of your wrist forces you to a halt. “Ride.” he orders, leaving no room for leniency. He wanted it. Now.
The look in his eyes was almost pleading, but he’d never been the type to beg. He would have his way no matter the cost.
You position so your thighs rest on either side of his. He was wet enough from the saliva of your mouth, slipping into your tight hole with ease. He grits his teeth, grunting slightly as you slowly sink down on him.
The head of his cock reaches your untouched depths, making you squeeze tighter against him. “Such a good little toy for me,” he groans, hands gripping your hips. “Please your master. Don’t make me tell you again. Ride.”
You press your hands to his midriff to steady your balance. Slowly you slide back up, almost pulling him out. You were sucking him in too tightly to let go, even if you tried.
Either way, Wesker forces you back down with what little strength he had. “Faster.” he shouts, and you don’t hesitate.
You bounce on his cock, walls suffocatingly massaging his length inside. His head lulls back as things pick up pace, hands tightening their hold on you.
His hips move along with yours, the best they can. He was desperately chasing his high. After you stopped him mid release prior, he was feeling extra needy. He refused to allow that to happen more than once.
He slams into you at an ungodly pace, you can hardly keep your eyes open. He splits you open on his cock with no regard for your pleasure, only focused on his own.
You were the one who offered to be used, after all.
“You’re going to take every drop of my precious seed. Do you understand?” he growls almost incoherent, lost in the pleasure.
You plead yes, that you understand.
“Say it aloud. Tell me what you are to me.”
You try to gather your thoughts. He didn’t cease his assault, shaking you with every rough thrust. “Y-your cum slut..” you mewl out, hoping your decided answer was satisfactory enough.
“hnng- yes,” he moans out deeply. “My good little slut. I’m going to fill you up and you’re just going to let me.”
He bullies into you rapidly, forcing out your cries as he milks himself in your insides.
He doesn’t slow as he cums in spurts, coating your walls with his white fluids. He continues to stuff it deeper into you as he goes, draining everything he has into you.
It pools out on top of him, leaking messily onto the bed.
Wesker relaxes his hold, no longer feeling so tense and worked up. He collapses back onto the bed, a sweaty panting mess, leaving you to sit and warm his cock.
“You’re going to give yourself to me everytime i request, from now on.”
Much to your surprise, Wesker pulls you down against him, chest to chest. He was never once affectionate towards you before. But now here he is, face burrowed in the crook of your neck.
His hands comfortingly play with your hair, lightly scratching at your scalp.
You melt into him, completely basking in the aftermath and enjoying his rare, gentle touch.
“You’re sleeping here tonight,” he states matter of factly. “You did quite well for me. I think you’re deserving of some extra attention.”
mlist
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firelilyfox · 2 months
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Nightmares & Soft Words
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Dune : Paul Atreides x female reader
Warnings : fluff / mention of loosing someone / mention of war / teasing
You had a nightmare & Paul comforts you
(English is not my first language so please excuse spelling and grammatical mistakes)
Words : 1033
______________________________
Your breathing is shallow as you wake up in the middle of the night because of another horrible dream. Beside you lays Paul who is still peacefully sleeping. His dark curls have managed to fall all over his beautiful face and you resist the urge to touch it to remind you that you are back in reality. Weeks have passed since you were able to sleep peacefully. Too much worries and sorrows filled your mind with fear.
Fear to loose Paul. Fear to see all your friends die. Fear that this brutal war will never end. 
But you haven’t told him about any of that. Paul has such a big responsibility to carry around, that the thought alone telling him about your stupid litte nightmares was pathetic. He deserves to rest and not have to think about his girlfriend being anxious about something that hasn’t even happened yet. 
You take a last look at him and deciding to go for a litte walk through the halls of your underground home. The massive, old stonewalls always seemed to calm you down since you were a little kid. You imagined all the stories that they had been witnessed and all of the Fremen that were here before. 
Every footstep of yours sends a little echo through the empty hallways and while you let your thoughts run free, you somehow find your way to the waters of the souls that died for the greater good. Normally this place would make people sad, but for the Fremen it is a great honor to still be a part of the remaining for eternity. 
The torches on the walls flickers and their light is reflected by the water, wich made the big hall looked warm and gloomy. Before you could take a seat near the water, something catches your attention. Paul was leaning against a wall right behind you. The look on his face made you nervous. 
„Why are you up? Did something happen?“ 
He comes towards you with a frown. „That’s what I should ask you, Y/N. What are you doing here in the middle of the night?“ 
„Oh it’s nothing. I-I just needed fresh air“, you shrugged. 
Paul shakes his head with a smile of disbelief. „You are terrible at lying, love.“ He puts his arms around you and pulls you closer to him. You let him, but still trying to avoid direct eye contact. You are more than sure about the fact, that Paul would be able to see all the horrible things you dreamed about in less than a second. So you just leaned against his touch and trying your best to put on an effortlessly smile for him. 
„Really it’s nothing. Maybe I ate something wrong or haven’t drank enough. We should go back to bed.“ You are trying to get out of his grip, but instead you can feel it tightened around your waist. 
„I won’t let you go anywhere now, until you told me the truth. You seem upset and I will be dammed if I let you go back to sleep like that.“ Paul puts his finger under your chin to force you softly to look at him. That’s when you start to tear up a little. „Talk to me, love.“ 
You sigh. „I had a nightmare again.“ 
His thumb softly wipes away a tear that was rolling down your cheek. „You haven’t told me you were haunted by nightmares before.“ 
„I didn’t want to stress you about something pathetic like that. With all that is going on with the war and the revolution right now … and the Fremen seeing you as their leader … there is no room for something irrelevant like that.“ 
Paul shuts you up with a soft kiss on the lips. Your hands grabbing the thin fabric of his shirt to hold him close to you. 
„Never say something like that again or I’m forced to use the voice on you to get rid of that stupid idea that your nightmares are irrelevant or that there is no room for you coming to me with your problems.“ His words were determining but his voice sounded so very soft, that your heart melted a bit. „I couldn’t possibly do any of this … crazy Lisan al Gaib stuff without knowing that you are alright by my side.“ 
You couldn’t hold back a little smile. „You are very good at finding the right words, Usul.“ 
You using his Fedaykin-Name always had the impact of lightens up his gaze. It reminds him, that you two are very much equal and that he is a part of something worth fighting for. 
„Now tell me what this nightmares are about.“ 
And you did. You told him everything while going back to your room and he hold your hand the entire time. The words came out like a waterfall but now that you hear them out loud, they not seemed so scary anymore. You felt the moment the tension left your body when the two of you got back to bed, lying next to each other so close that no nightmare can come between. 
„If you ever have thoughts like that you need to tell me, love. It is unbearable to me if I can’t be sure, that you and that pretty little head of yours are doing okay.“ He tapped his finger against your forehead. „Do you understand?“ 
„I do understand. But for now…“ You say while you sit up again and take a seat on his lap with spread legs. Paul leaned back on his forearms, admiring you as if there is nothing more beautiful in this world. And to him, there is none. „For now my head is doing more than just okay.“ 
He gives you a little smirk. „That’s good to know. Maybe there is a way we could make your body feel the same way.“ Paul grabs your hips and you start kissing him passionately while your fingers run through his hair. A dark sound escapes his throat as you are slowly moving your hips to create pressure to his growing length between your legs. 
„We should figure out how good you can make me feel, Muad’Dib.“ 
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tcfactory · 3 months
Text
A smile for the master
Okay, what if white lotus Luo Binghe and OG Shen Qingqiu body swap.
The fake cultivation manual does make Luo Binghe qi deviate. Relatively early too, he's still in his white lotus phase. This qi deviation just coincides with one of Shen Qingqiu's many, many deviations and, by some freak twist of luck, swaps their bodies.
The only people who know about this are Yue Qingyuan, Mu Qingfang and the people directly involved, because they can't let word get out about the body swap. Unlike all the regular shenanigans (amnesia, de-aging, animal transformations, etc.) Mu Qingfang has no idea how to approach fixing this. He can't even tell if it is possible to fix it or not. This is such a one-in-a-million thing that there's no precedent.
So for the time being Luo Binghe in Shen Qingqiu's body will be confined to the bamboo house, under some supervision, with the excuse that Shen Qingqiu is still under danger of another qi deviation. And Shen Qingqiu gets to go out and pretend to be Binghe.
He's meant to move into the bamboo house to 'assist his shizun in his recovery' (yeah, right, like anyone would believe that), but the first thing he does once everyone leaves them alone that evening is grab a few things in a qiankun pouch and prepares to leave.
"Where is shizun going?"
"Wipe that pathetic look off my face! I'm sleeping in the woodshed."
"But shizun doesn't have to! This disciple will sleep in the side room, I-"
"I don't care where you sleep in my house. But I'm not sleeping under the same roof as a man, and you currently qualify as such."
It's such a strange thing to say that it sticks with Binghe - does his shizun genuinely feel safer in the woodshed than in the same house with his own body??? - but he is still disoriented and in so much pain that he doesn't have it in him to argue. Mu-shishu said it was not unusual for a severe qi deviation to cause pain, but he hopes it will fade quickly.
The pain doesn't fade by morning. It stays a persistent, sharp ache in his joints that seems to sap the strength from his limbs. Binghe thinks he can cheer himself up by cooking breakfast in shizun's kitchen, but his hands shake and his fingers refuse to bend right. He still scrapes together two servings of palatable congee, which gets him an unreadable look from his returning shizun. You'd think Binghe would be able to read the man's expressions on his own face better, but all he can say for certain is that his face has never made that expression before.
"Shizun, how do you stop the shaking?" Binghe asks tentatively. Shen Qingqiu made tea and brought over a few dry biscuits that looked completely unappetizing to Binghe. He planned to pointedly ignore them in favor of his own, much better food, except he has eaten two spoonfuls of congee and he's suddenly feeling sick. Something on his face must be showing because Shen Qingqiu snatches his bowl away and pushes the biscuits to him instead.
"Eat one, slowly, with the tea. It will help you keep the food down." In Luo Binghe's body his shizun has no problem eating both portions while Binghe nibbles on the biscuit. It's bitter from the herbs, but it does help. "Haven't you learned how to channel qi to stabilize your body? Useless little beast." After a moment his eyes grow wide and he hastily holds up a hand. "Don't try it with my body! The last thing we need is for you to have another qi deviation."
"Even this useless one knows how to direct and circulate his qi, shizun." Binghe tries to pout - it has never worked on his shizun, but maybe he will be more receptive of such tactics when it's his own face - but finds that the muscles of his face are not working as they should.
"Not with my meridians you don't. I thought even the lowliest of outer disciples have heard by now that my cultivation base is ruined." He squints up at Binghe and his glare is no less formidable on a different face. "Little beast. What are you trying to do with my face?"
Binghe has, in fact, reached up and is trying to feel out why he can't move part of his face as he should. "This... is there a scar here?" He's not familiar enough with scars to be sure, but he can feel the slightly different texture of the skin with his fingers as it curves around his cheek and jaw. Strange, he's sure he would have noticed before if his shizun had such a big scar on his face.
Shen Qingqiu slaps his hand away.
"A mule kicked me in the face when I was a child. They put an ointment on it at the time, so it healed well enough that it's no longer visible."
Not visible, but still present. Later, after Shen Qingqiu leaves for Luo Binghe's classes, he stands in front of the bronze mirror to test the range of his expressions and suddenly understands why Shen Qingqiu prefers to hide the lower half of his face behind a fan. The scar tissue tugs on the muscles of his face and makes the way one corner of his mouth moves rather ghastly.
It's not the only scar he has. It takes Binghe until the afternoon to work up the courage to take a bath and he can't help to look at his shizun's body then. The history written into the man's skin is distressing to say the least. Cuts and whip marks, all etched in deep, and burns, so many burns. The most horrifying is on one of his thighs, the muscle and skin deformed where it was burned deep; Binghe has seen kitchen accidents before and this has the look of boiling oil, but it's position and size both speak of intentionality. He can't even imagine what shizun has done to be injured there, so close to an intimate area.
And the crowning jewel of all scars, the one that raises the most questions in Binghe's mind, is the slave brand. Qiu, it reads on the left side of his chest, still clearly legible despite obvious signs that someone tried to ruin it with deep cuts; the character just ate even deeper into the flesh to retain its shape.
He's standing in front of the bronze mirror, staring numbly at the brand while the water goes cold next to him, only snapping out of his stupor when the front door slams open, then closed, then his shizun calls for him. "In here, shizun!"
Shen Qingqiu is in a good mood - the body he's in is strong and healthy, despite everything, and unlike that dolt of a little beast, he knows exactly how to get out of chores - so he doesn't immediately snap at Binghe when he finds him inspecting his body. "It would have been too much of a blessing to expect you to not undress and poke at my flesh the moment you were left alone."
"I just wanted a bath." The face he currently wears doesn't lend itself to his usual tactics, so he simply... doesn't try. It makes him much more tolerable in Shen Qingqiu's eyes. "Begging shizun's forgiveness, I expected him to take longer with this disciple's daily chores."
"Unlike you, I don't have the personality of a doormat. I've done the chores for you and Yingying and then tricked one of your shixiongs into insulting Ming Fan, so he got saddled with the rest." He says it like it's the easiest thing in the world and there's a disapproving edge to it. See, little beast? His eyes say. Why don't you do it this way, it's so easy.
"I don't know what shizun expects from me," Binghe finally says, his frustrations overflowing. "I want nothing more than to cultivate in peace! I used every trick I have ever learned to make the bullies go away, but it only made things worse!" He claws at the slave mark, as if he could rip it from the skin and hand it to Shen Qingqiu. "I thought shizun to be a rich master who would not understand, but shizun has come from a background as lowly as this one's! Shizun should understand! Shizun should-!"
"Shut up. You don't know anything about me." There is no real anger in those words, but Binghe immediately shuts up. Shen Qingqiu regards him with something calculating, until he finally comes to a decision of sorts. He closes his eyes, schools his features and when he opens them again the picture of innocence looks up at Binghe, a harmless white sheep who could do no harm.
It's almost as good as when Binghe does it.
"What did you say your mother's job was?" The moment is gone and Shen Qingqiu arranges his features back into something more comfortable and Binghe, still reeling, answers on autopilot.
"This one's elderly mother was a lowly washerwoman."
"An elderly woman, of a low, but stable position, with no ambitions left in life and no power to protect her son." Shen Qingqiu exhales slowly. "She taught you to smile, hasn't she? To be good and docile to avoid trouble."
"Yes!" Finally, it feels like they are going somewhere, they have found common ground. "My mother taught me that no matter what grief or grudge settles in my heart, I should always-"
"Have a smile for the master," Shen Qingqiu finishes for him. He looks annoyed, but not angry - at least not at Binghe. "Go take that bath." He reheats the water with the touch of his hand and a careful application of qi. "This master has essays to grade."
The hot water is a blessing, but Binghe still hurries to get clean and get dressed again. Shizun, true to his word, is grading essays at the table when Binghe returns. Binghe fidgets with nothing to do while his shizun works, so eventually Shen Qingqiu chases him off to make tea so he can work in peace.
Binghe is just returning when the sect leader arrives. "Qingqiu-shidi, Luo-shizi. I hope everything is going all right so far?"
"Good timing," Shen Qingqiu looks up from the essays with a wolfish expression that makes Binghe's face look almost scary. "Qi-ge, think fast: smile for the master-"
"-Snarl for the wolves-" Yue Qingyuan answers without thinking, something sharp and dark glinting in his usually soft eyes. This minute slip in his mask scares Binghe more than the worst of his shizun's temper.
"-knife for the rivals." Unexpectedly, Shang Qinghua pops his head out from behind the wide bulk of the sect leader. "Why are we reciting the Urchins' Laws?"
Shen Qingqiu narrows his eyes at his shidi. "Where this one grew up we said rocks for the rivals, but the sentiment is the same." He gestures for Binghe, who stands frozen in Shen Qingqiu's body, to serve the tea. "What is Shang-shidi doing here?"
"I might have, ah. Overheard? Overheard the situation and I might know an herb that can remedy it. Liu Qingge is already on his way to get it, so it's only a matter of days!" He rubs the back of his neck. "I just wanted to be here when zhangmen-shixiong tells shixiong the good news."
"That's acceptable." Shen Qingqiu takes a sip from his tea, then pushes the essays away in favor of an empty sheet. "Then Shang-shidi can stay and help us remedy a serious shortcoming in disciple Luo's education. It would seem he only learned to smile and never to snarl, leaving him with the appearance of an unfortunately spineless disposition."
"I see." All three adults look at Luo Binghe with pity, even the one currently wearing his body. He takes a big gulp of his tea to get away from their staring and almost chokes from the overwhelming bitter taste.
"It's fine, shizi! I think there are no better people to teach disciple Luo these lessons, so he will learn them in no time!" Shang Qinghua hurries to reassure him.
"That's not- thanking shishu for his encouraging words! It's just this tea is unexpectedly bitter."
The lords all look puzzled. "Bitter? Has Shen-shidi acquired a new blend?"
"As if you could tell," Shen Qingqiu huffs dismissively and takes another sip of his tea. "I don't taste anything wrong with it."
They all turn to Shang Qinghua, who takes a sip and immediately makes a noise of disgust.
"It's been severely over-steeped," he declares, pushing the cup away.
"Interesting." Shen Qingqiu drinks the rest of his tea and shakes his head. "Disciple Luo can't taste bitterness, so he doesn't know when he over steeps the tea."
"This one can taste bitterness, shizun! Mu-shishu's cold medicine-"
"-doesn't count. Even zhangmen-shixiong can tell it's bitter and he has almost completely lost his sense of taste when we were children."
The sect leader has a soft, awkward look on his face and Shang Qinghua stifles a laugh behind his sleeve. "Can confirm! Yue-shixiong once drank an entire undiluted bottle of chili oil on a bet when we were disciples. Luo-shizi is in good company."
Good company indeed. It's strange and a little frightening to see the three untouchable immortal masters acting so human, but Binghe rubs the scar on his face and thinks of masks. The same way Binghe puts on the mask of a meek little lamb every morning, the peak lords put on their own masks each day.
In the fifteen days it takes for Liu-shishu to get the herbs and return, they teach Binghe how to navigate the power plays of the sect in the way only those not born into power know:
A smile for the master (be pleasant and meek and uninteresting in the face of those who can hurt you without consequence, because it's boring to bully docile and uninteresting servants. Bide your time and only plot where they can't see it).
Yue Qingyuan smiles, because he has risen above the rest. Nobody would dare to trample him, so he can wear a smile if he wants; it makes him more approachable. Luo Binghe smiles at him and the sect leader winks back; this comes the easiest to him.
A snarl for the wolves (do not let your peers trample you. You are roughly of equal standing and power, so fight for what you deserve. If someone with only slightly higher standing tries to strike against you and you can get away with it, bite the hand that struck you, so they would think twice before they try again).
Shen Qingqiu was born a wolf and will likely die one, too broken and battered to become a prized, pampered hound. He snarls at the world and wants Binghe to snarl back at him, to show him that he has the determination to make it through. (Urchins who don't learn to bare their teeth when they should all die, trampled in the dirt, and Binghe suspects that his shizun has seen it happen enough times that he has hardened his heart against it.) It comes frighteningly easy, once he tries, and he makes sure to restrain himself so he doesn't become a mirror of his bitter shizun.
A knife for the rivals (be ruthless and deadly to the outsiders who come to harm you and yours. Set aside internal strife in the face of outside threat and sharpen your fangs together; the only good enemy is a dead one).
Binghe doesn't know what to think of Shang Qinghua at first. The An Ding lord has his own flavor of pathetic (it's not quite the same as smiling, he thinks), but Binghe is not a fool. If the sect leader is the smile and his shizun the snarl, then Shang Qinghua is the knife, and his cultivated helplessness is the perfect disguise for his sharp edge.
Out of all three of them, he decides that Shang Qinghua scares him the most.
The day after they are switched back Luo Binghe returns to the bamboo house to report to his shizun.
"So early today, little beast." Shen Qingqiu doesn't look up from the novel he's reading, sprawled carelessly over the couch. Binghe knows that this crack in his shizun's peerless facade is only there for him to see because he has lived in his body for two weeks and knows exactly how much agony he is in day in day out (Binghe did some much less dignified sprawling when he was wearing that body, that's for sure), but it still makes him feel honored, in a way. He's in on a secret none of the other disciples are and it makes him feel... special.
"Ming-shixiong had an unfortunate incident with a hive of wasps and forgot to assign his shidis extra chores."
Shen Qingqiu glances at him over the edge of his book. "Where in the hells have you found wasps this time of the year?"
"I could not say. Shizun will have to ask Shang-shishu."
The set of Shen Qingqiu's mouth shifts. It's not a smile, but it's as close as the man gets and Luo Binghe's heart soars when he sees it. His shizun stands with mesmerizing feline grace and plucks a manual off from his shelf. "Catch." Binghe scrambles to catch the manual, his eyes going wide when he recognizes his shizun's calligraphy. The book is bound in an old cover to make it look used, but the pages and the contents are all brand new. "This master has noticed that disciple Luo's current manual is unsuitable for his cultivation. This one will be a better fit."
"Thank you, shizun!" He turns to walk into the side room, planning to pretend that he belongs here ('sometimes if you are confident enough, you can make others think that you belong somewhere you have no business being', Shang Qinghua said), but he stops dead when his shizun calls after him.
"Where do you think you are going, little beast?"
"To my room, shizun." He brazenly meets Shen Qingqiu's narrowed eyes and carefully gauges the man's mood. He's not angry yet. "This disciple has no place in the dorms, but he got to thinking: wouldn't it reflect badly on our peak and our peak lord if word got out that one of the Qing Jing disciples sleeps in the woodshed? This one is not a man, so he thought shizun would have no opposition against him taking the unused side room in exchange for performing extra chores around the house."
Shen Qingqiu approaches him with an aura like a fierce storm, but Luo Binghe stands his ground. The man wanted him to snarl back; it was time to test the practice of that theory.
"Luo Binghe has done a lot of thinking in the day since we last met."
"Of course. This disciple had years of thoughtlessness to make up for."
Shen Qingqiu exhales sharply; a silent laugh. "Luo Binghe might not be a man yet, but he will grow up to be one. Why should I tolerate his presence?"
"This one might become a man, but only if shizun can't mold him into something better."
"Insolent little beast!" He expects the smack with the fan. It smarts like always and it's likely going to leave a bruise. He doesn't expect the hand on his head, not petting, but... acknowledging. "Go to your room."
Binghe can't restrain the smile that spreads over his face. It earns him another smack, lighter this time, but it's worth it. He sets the new manual down on the bed and starts brewing tea for his shizun, lighting a timer talisman so he doesn't seep the leaves too long.
It took him to walk a mile in his shizun's boots in the most convoluted way possible, but he has finally done it: he found common ground with his master. It could only get better from now.
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hyyukas · 5 months
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cutie!hyuka <3
smut mdni
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warnings: the dom & sub dynamic is a bit less prominent in this drabble, Kai's a virgin and reader is not, readers gender is not talked about and neither is their specific genitalia, dacryphilia ? praise, penetration, friends to ? big dick Kai, belly bulge, I don't really like how this turned out just because I fussed over it so much :/
your best friend was a virgin. huening kai was a virgin. he told you so himself, with flushed cheeks and teary eyes from embarrassment. he looked so deliciously pathetic you almost felt some sympathy for him. the only thing that was stopping you from feeling that sympathy was the sudden and overwhelming urge to fuck him into the couch.
and he was just so appreciative that you'd help him out, like the sweet best friend you'd always been.
kai was breathless after you pulled away from his lips and started kissing down his throat. every sensation felt like euphoria to him. his skin under your fingertips burned like nothing else ever had. every time your lips touched him he felt like he was being transported to heaven. nothing could ever beat this feeling.
"y/n. . ." kai whimpered as your knee brushed against his crotch. you chuckled against the skin of his neck, grinning like a cheshire cat when you felt his hips lift up in order to feel more of you.
"gotta be patient baby" you whispered in his ear whilst your hands continued to run all over his body, gripping and groping places you knew he'd keen for more of. and just as you expected your words were met with eager nods and cute little whimpers.
god he looked so pretty. his brown eyes filled with lust pleading up at you, begging for you to just touch him already. and his glossy lips that were parted just right, they were practically demanding to be kissed until bruised.
"so fucking beautiful. . ."
you'd never really felt this way about your best friend before. he'd always just been huening kai to you, huening kai your goofy best friend. but now as you stared at each other, hips pressed desperately against one anothers, you couldn't help the way your heart fluttered. (or maybe it was just the horniness getting to you)
"please, need you to touch me. . . it hurts" Kai mewled out and started to squeeze the flesh of your plush thighs, hands feeling anywhere they could reach. you shivered under his touch and quickly gave in, pulling his sweats down along with his boxers which he gladly helped kick off.
it was a little perverted but after having those words whispered in your ear and a kiss pressed right below your jaw you couldn't help but hurry along with your movements, you'd never tell Kai but you were desperate to have him.
to say you were stunned when your eyes landed on Kai's dick was an understatement. he was fucking massive. you unconsciously bit your lip and felt yourself clench around nothing, would it even fit ?
you shamelessly stared down at his crotch, thirsty eyes drinking up his fat mushroom tip that just looked so yummy. you could only imagine how heavenly it would feel to have him poking that good spot inside of you. "fuck. . . you're so big Kai"
your words alone had him twitching against his stomach, he swore he could come right then and there. but he decided to hold out once he noticed you pulling down your trousers and undergarments.
the next few minutes were a blur. there was so much teasing and touching that it made Kai's mind numb, all he could do was sit there prettily and huff out high pitched mewls into the crook of your neck whilst you did what you wanted with him (which was mostly just fondling and worshiping everything above his hips) but you made sure to bring him out of his daze once you started bouncing up and down on his cock.
it was loud to say the least, your ass smacking against the meat of his thighs every time you came back down, the sound of slick and sticky skin rubbing against each other, and of course the sound of both of your whimpers and moans mingling in the air. you wouldn't blame your neighbours if they came knocking at your door tomorrow.
Kai's head rolled back against the sofa and his lips parted in a silent moan, the way you were squeezing so tight had him borderline delirious, god why hadn't he done this sooner ? he cursed himself in his mind and prayed to god that his dick was good enough to have you coming back for more, now that he'd felt your velvety insides there was absolutely no way you could have an innocent friendship anymore.
"you're making me feel so fucking good" you groaned out in-between curses and moans. he was rubbing up against you so well, his fat cock stretching out your greedy hole which was more than pleased to swallow all of him.
he stared up at you, hips bucking and quivering once he saw how blissful your face was, he had no doubt he probably looked the same. " 'm so close, gonna come. . ." Kai whimpered and scrunched the cushions between his balled up fists.
you took note of his words, how he twitched inside of you and slowed your movements, taking to grinding yourself against him instead.
"not yet, baby. you've been so good for me, just a little longer yeah ?"
your halt in bouncing and your words had him shaking his head and whining out. "can't ! you feel too good, please don't stop !" at this point your languid movements were bringing tears to his eyes, his delicate lashes clumping together with the liquid, but he knew you liked that.
he knew because of the way he felt you flutter around him. and because of the way you let out a gutteral moan, lifting your body to start jumping up and down on him again.
"shit, your dick is absolutely perfect,, can practically feel you in my stomach." you whispered before slamming your lips onto Kai's and letting your mouths swallow each other's shameless sounds.
the last straw for Kai was when you grabbed his hand and pressed it against the bottom of your stomach, making him grope the small bulge he was creating. he let out a choked wail and bit down on your lip, stomach twisting in pleasure as he spilled inside of you. he knew for sure you would be doing this again.
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tag list is open ! @cinnikoi @zzstar @mini-mews
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melrodrigo · 11 months
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I really love puppy love omg 😭😭 what about when puppy like reader gets really injured by someone and ends up in the clinic and tries to hide it so that wednesday wont notice? Its up to you if you wanna write it!
ty babe! i’m glad you like it
i might’ve gone a little overboard and wrote more than i thought i would, enjoy!
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Okay. Maybe picking a fight with a 6’2 giant wasn’t your brightest idea.
It started in fencing class, you making your way towards Enid, for a pair exercise. Wednesday wasn’t in class today, opting instead to sneak out and work on the hyde case, she had mentioned briefly.
“Yeah dude, Wednesday is sooo into me. I can feel it. She’s been giving me so many signals.” You hear as you walk past Xavier and his hoard of friends.
You can’t help the sudden tug in your heart, and the small voice in your head that said maybe he was right.
Wednesday had been spending a lot of time with Xavier lately, but she had claimed it was for the hyde case. It didn’t help the swell of jealousy that surged through you whenever you saw them though.
Stupid feelings. Why are you jealous anyway? It’s not like you and Wednesday are together.
A voice cuts you out of your thoughts, “Totally dude, and when you finally hit that, you gotta tell me alll the details alright?”
Your face scrunches in disgust, hands on both sides of your body starting to clench into fists.
“You know I will. I swear, she’s all over me. Next time we’re alone together, it’s on.” Xavier replies, drawing an emphasis on the last word.
Nope, that’s it.
You turn sharply and bring your clenched fists up to your face, resembling the stance of a boxer.
It probably looked a little funny, since you were what, a million feet shorter than him? But you honestly couldn’t have cared less in the moment.
“Don’t you dare talk about her like that.” You hiss, eyes hard and unforgiving.
Xavier stays quiet for a moment, then let’s out a loud laugh.
“And what are you going to do about it, huh? Wednesday’s not here to protect your ass this time.” He drawls, smirk on his crusty thin lips.
He leans in, too close for comfort and whispers, “Wednesday would never give you the light of day. You’re so pathetically in love with her, all of us can see it. But Wednesday’s in love with me.”
He pauses for a moment, like he’s trying to think of something good to say.
“And when we finally fuck, i’ll be sure to send you some photo evidence.”
That does it. You snap, lunging forward and grabbing his hair, pulling harshly.
“Ow! Get off of me!”
It’s hard to remember what happens next, you’re so lost in the fury and rage of it all you can barely register that you’re suddenly on top of him, pummeling his stupid face with all your might.
You grin in satisfaction as you see blood start to make its way from his lips down to his neck.
But your luck doesn’t last very long, and he manages to kick up at a certain weak spot between your legs, leaving you to stumble and hit the floor.
Groaning, you try and get up, but he’s faster. The adrenaline is fading away, and you’re starting to realize that he is in fact a lot stronger, even if you hate to admit it.
You start to lose feeling in the right side of your face, where his knuckles have collided against your skin. Bruises form so fast you almost let out a chuckle, was your skin really that sensitive?
“That’s enough! Xavier get off YN.” The teacher’s voice booms. Could he really not have cut in sooner?
“Enid, take YN to the nurses office.”
You barely register Enid and Ajax rushing over to you, taking you in their arms and dragging you out the classroom.
You smile a toothy grin at them.
“Did I win?” And then everything turns to black.
______
When you wake up again, Enid’s at your side immediately, looking down at you, worry prominent in her eyes.
“YN! Are you okay?”
You nod, only to find out that it’s extremely difficult to move your head and not feel like you just broke every bone in your body.
“I’m good.” You croak.
You look around the room, relieved to find that Wednesday wasn’t there. You don’t think you could bear the look she would give you, so full of worry and so unlike Wednesday.
“Where’s Wednesday?” You manage out, looking at Enid expectedly.
“She hasn’t come back from Jericho yet.” Enid confirms your suspicions, sounding a little uneasy.
“Xavier’s really got to watch his back, I have no idea what Wednesday’s going to do when she finds out about this, but it’s NOT going to be pretty.” She continues, eyes wide.
At that, your own eyes widen, and you try to shake your head.
“No no, Enid, please don’t tell Wednesday about this. I don’t want her to see me in this shape.” You reach for Enid’s hand, making sure she’s looking at you.
“But…”
“Please, Enid. You don’t have to lie or anything, just tell her you don’t know where I am. I’ll be good in a couple of days.” You plead.
“Alright, fine.” She mumbles, taking your hand in hers and rubbing the back in comfort.
——
The next few days are spent in agony. The pain is starting to subside, but you still look like a beat up raisin. Purple and green bruises litter your skin, but the real sense of pain is coming from the distance between you and Wednesday.
You two had grown….very somewhat close the last few months, though the both of you would never admit it.
It was extremely hard trying to avoid Wednesday, and even harder to cover the bruises on your face. One good look and you knew she would’ve figured it out.
So for the past week, you’ve stumbled into bushes, fallen over benches, and hit the corridor walls in an attempt to swerve from Wednesday many times.
Every time she tried to approach you, you’d hang your head low, never meeting her eyes.
It was going well for the most part, until Ms.Thornhill had decided she wanted people to work in pairs.
You crossed your fingers, praying to the lord that you didn’t even worship you wouldn’t be stuck with Wednesday.
But to no avail, your luck once again ran out.
“Wednesday Addams, YN LN.”
You sigh loudly and make your way over to sit next to Wednesday, still avoiding her eye at all costs.
Most of the lesson is spent in silence, both of you lost stirring in your thoughts.
Then, “Why have you been avoiding me?” Wednesday says, hurried, like she couldn’t help it from slipping.
You sigh, for what feels like the millionth time that day, and manage a quiet, “I haven’t been avoiding you Wednesday.”
It comes out so weak, you wouldn’t have even believed yourself.
“Yes you have. I want to know the reason, have I done something wrong? Maybe I said something to hurt your….feelings?” She pauses before the last word, tone turning uncertain.
You frown.
“No of course not Wednesday, I just…” You trail off.
You turn to Wednesday, determined to give the performance of a lifetime, but forget that your face still looks like a bruised peach, and you definitely shouldn’t look her in the face.
You let out a final sigh and pull the head of your hoodie down, feeling small under Wednesdays stare.
Her eyes widen a little at the sight of you, and worry fills them. You can’t help but feel a tinge of happiness at how much she seems to care, letting the emotionless mask slip for a second.
She stands up suddenly, startling you and the 20 other people in the room.
“Ms. Thornhill, may YN and I please be excused?”
Wednesday doesn’t wait for Ms.Thornhill to answer before taking you by the wrist and dragging you out.
She doesn’t say a word until she gets to her dorm, quickly opening the door and throwing you in.
“Wednesday?” You squeak.
She turns and reaches out to touch your face, thumb rubbing just the slightest on your bruises.
A gentleness she didn’t know she possessed took over, still moving her hand in small circles all over your face.
“Who did this to you?” She murmurs, and her voice is filled with such intense worry it makes you want to break down.
Your head falls down on instinct, staring at your shoes like they’re the most interesting piece of art in the world.
Wednesday grips your chin and tilts your face back up, inches away from you.
Then she’s placing her hands on your waist, hands rigid, like she’s nervous.
You look so vulnerable, and she might’ve even say sort of adorable, she can’t help but lean forward and press a kiss to your cheek, on top of the scar.
Your breath hitches in your throat, body stiff.
She continues giving you little pecks all around the bruises, and you relax in her arms.
After a while, she pulls away, and you grab at her on instinct. She lets you, body pressing up to yours once again.
“You never answered my question.” She says.
“Xavier. He said something bad about you, but it doesn’t matter now. This is much better.” You mumble as you dig your face in her uniform.
She tenses up at this.
“He’s going to die a slow, painful death. And not the satisfying kind.” She decides, hand wrapping around your waist protectively.
You hum, “Who cares? I just wanna stay like this.”
The two of you don’t say much after that, content in simply being in each other’s presence.
-
When you get to class the next day, you bite back a smirk when you see Xavier’s positively beaten up face.
You walk over to him, acting all nonchalant.
“Yeah dude. She’s soooo into you.”
-
A/N: I kinda really enjoyed writing that, ty anon! Wednesday’s such a sweet softie on the inside.
1K notes · View notes
evilcowgirl · 8 months
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pink in the night
abby anderson/reader
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summary: abby nd you have been in an on-and-off relationship since the beginning of college, when you decide you've had enough of her she always finds her way back to you. (wc: 3k)
nsfw, college au, mean-ish abby, fem!reader, dom!abby
a/n: first tlou fic !!! aaa so excited to be writing again hope everyone is doing okay mwah xox
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୨♡୧
It's late, much too late for you to still be awake and on edge. Your dorm room doesn't feel like your own anymore, regardless of how many times you've slept alone in this little twin sized bed, your body can tell that something is missing now. There’s this lack of warmth that leaves you shivering.
For months now, you've fallen asleep with your legs interwoven with hers. Her hands around your middle, pulling your back against her. Your hands wrap around your arms in a pathetic attempt to comfort yourself. You miss her so much that it’s pathetic considering it had been less than a week since you last saw her. Actually, if you were going to be exact, you saw her two days ago at the cafeteria and you promptly had to leave to stop yourself from getting emotional. She had always teased you about how dependent you were on her. Kissing your cheek as she told you how helpless you’d be without her. Until now, you never knew how bad it really was.
It pains you just to think about it. All the words she threw at you, hoping to break you down just enough so she could pick up all the little broken pieces once again. This time you actually put your foot down, shocking you and her both. You’d told her to leave with tears running down your cheeks. You had to repeat yourself three times before she realized that you were actually serious this time. The shock on her face made you feel good, like you had done something to prove her wrong.
“I’ll be back when you calm the fuck down.” She said to you as she left your dorm that day. Even in her defeat she still lets you know you're not strong enough to stay away from her forever. When the door slammed behind her you flinched, the silence leaving you to really think about what you wanted. In the moment, it was peace and quiet and maybe a drink. But now, six days and a handful of hours later, all you wanted was Abby’s hands on your skin. She was always so gentle with you, completely contradictory to the way she looked to most people. Only you really got to see that softer size of her. The side that would wrap her arms around your waist and call you hers. It was easy to remember the good parts of Abby when she wasn’t there to remind you just how mean she could be.
You sighed, turning over in bed for the umpteenth time. Your blanket falling off your shoulder and leaving it bare and chilly as you gazed over at your phone sitting on your bedside table. It wasn’t a good idea by any means, but it was late and you were lovesick in the most dreadful definition of the word. You reached over to grab your phone, going to her number was second nature. Your fingers hovered over your keyboard for a while as you thought of what you should say. It was a little past 2 in the morning but you knew Abby would still be awake, she always stayed up much later than you.
“i miss you a lot”
You hit send before you could second guess your decision. Immediately you tossed your phone under your pillow and pressed your blushing face into it. Your heart was beating fast enough for you to feel it in your throat. The embarrassment had set in much quicker that you thought it would. You still had time to unsend it, you reminded yourself. She’s probably busy with her friends or something and wont check her phone until later tonight. You could unsend it and turn your phone off and forget this even happened.
“I miss you too.”
When you felt your phone buzz you stopped breathing. You half hopped that you imagined it, but when you checked the notification was plain as day. “Oh god, I’m so stupid.” you whispered to yourself as you started typing.
“come over?”
Her response was immediate, like she was waiting for it.
“On my way now.”
You tossed your phone once again, squealing a bit into your pillow at what you'd just started up.
୨♡୧
Abby knew it was going to happen at some point. To give you credit, she definitely didn’t think it would take this long. Around day 3 she actually started to get nervous, asking her teammates if they thought she really messed up this time, if she’d lost you for real. She had the tendency to take things too far, it was basically what she was known for. Whether she was working out, or fucking, or pushing her girlfriend to the edge for the millionth time, she never knew when to stop. You didn’t deserve it and she knew that. She didn’t know why she acted the way that she did, all she knew was that you seemed like you could handle her. Apparently she had been wrong. The walk to your dorm took half the time it usually does. She was on a mission to make your forgive her, she couldn’t go on like this. Not knowing what you were doing every hour of the day, not hearing your voice. It was killing her, not that she would ever admit that to you.
She used her spare key to unlock your door, cracking it open and slipping in as to not make too much noise. Your room was dark, barely lit by a little star-shaped night light plugged into your wall. There was a sugary vanilla scent in the air that she was oh-so familiar with. She steps over a few of your stuffed animals to kneel by your bed where you sit waiting for her.
Soft light from your bedside lamp illuminates her face and at that moment you think she's got to be an angel. You know better though, shes far from innocent and she had proved that to you a thousand times over. She’s looking down at your lap where your hands are fidgeting.
"Abby." You said simply. The word left your lips so naturally, it felt more right than anything else you could've possibly said in that moment. Just seeing her in front of you made your hands twitch. The need to just touch overwhelming you. You wondered if she noticed; Abby always seemed to notice everything. At hearing your voice she finally turns back to face you. The way her eyes soften when they meet yours makes you want to forget all the things she's said to you.
"I'm here," She says and you almost laugh. You probably would've if you weren't so painfully thankful. "Are you. . . Alright?" She says in a weird almost nervous tone. It's jarring to hear her like this, and a part of you knows how wrong it is that you like it so much.
"I'm okay now that you're here." You say. It's genuine and the hopeless look on your face tells her that. You look so lost without her and that's exactly what she wanted isn't it? But now, actually being face-to-face with you, she's being forced to rethink. She sighs quietly, rolling her head back a little like you'd just done something irreversible. You secretly hope you did.
“You remember what you said, right?” She asks you, her voice all soft. She pushes a large hand under your soft blanket. You inhale as she stops right on your bare thigh and leaves it there.
You nod. You knew she would do this, make you think about what you did. Make you regret it.
“You didn’t mean that though, did you? You don’t want me to leave you alone.” She tells you and you couldn’t agree more. Her hand starts to kneed at you, like she’s prying out a response. You give her what she wants.
“I didn’t know what I was saying, Abby. I need you so bad, I can’t-I can’t think without you.” You whine to her. She smiles so sweetly to remind you how she’s getting off on your pleading. Her hand is wandering now, it feels like a reward for giving up your humility for her. You don’t feel ashamed for it though. Her hand moves higher, closer to where you’re warm and growing wet just from. being close to her.
“Such a good girl” She whispers, her voice so low you almost miss it. At that, your thigh twitches, clearly amusing her. “I suppose you want me to touch you?” She says with a sick grin on her lips. You nod with your eyes stuck on her, bright and filled with hope like she was some kind of god to you. She loved it, it turned her on more than anything else. “I know, I know. . . d’you think you deserve it though?”
You debate a bit in your head for a moment, looking down and away. Did you deserve it? To have Abby make you feel good after you’d tried to leave her? She shifts closer, her face close enough to yours now that you feel her breath on your cheek. “Tell me you’re sorry, then i’ll think about touching you.” It’s the best deal anyone could offer you.
“I’m so sorry Abby, please, I need you so bad.” You plead to her with your sweet little voice that makes her swoon. Your pretty glossed lips tremble when she hums, considering let you have what you want.
“Yeah?” She asks you. A large hand makes its way to the soft material of your panties and she can feel the heat radiating from you already. “Jesus. . .” She says under her breath.
She’s got to see you, she has to. When she pulls off your blanket you shiver at the shock. All you’ve got on other than your underwear is an oversized t-shirt that definitely belongs to her, with her high school football team’s name on it in faded letters. It’s one of your favorite shirts to sleep in since she left it at your room about two months ago. The last time she saw you in it she’d gotten all possessive and fucked you until your bed frame scratched up the wall behind it. She remembered it vividly. How loud you had been for her that night, the way your hands gripped at her arms as she entered you. She thought about it a lot, it was one of her favorite daydreams. Right now though, in the present, her eyes were trained on the damp middle of your light pink panties. She crawls up onto your bed then, laying you back as she did so she could hover over your lower half. Your legs part for her easily and she kisses your thigh in return. She sucked in a breath as she brought a finger down to trace over your slit through the fabric. There's a cute little bow at the top of your panties that she toys with. She watches your stomach tenses up when she touches you like that. She brings her hand lower, stroking up and down the length of your cunt lazily. She blinks up at you and you look almost pained, eyebrows knitted together and a pout she wants to kiss off your face. God you're so spoiled.
“Abby. . .” You said shakily. The feeling of her fingers on your pussy was heavenly, but you needed more. Her skin against your skin.
“Shh, be patient.” She tells you.
You watch as she adjusts herself to get closer and you feel a burning in your stomach, knowing exactly what was coming next. She placed an open mouthed kiss right up against your clit, tasting your wetness through the thin, soaked through fabric. She loved doing this, every time she ate you out she started like this, and without fail it always got you worked up. The next time she brings her mouth down on you, you can’t keep your noises in. A high pitched sound comes out of your mouth, a sound that you forgot you could make after all these days away from Abby. You missed how good she could make you feel. You feel her smirking against you, cocky as usual about the effect she had on you. She decides to give you what she knows you want now and pushes your panties to the side with two of her fingers. Your exposed cunt aching for her.
“So pretty.” She says before licking a short stripe against your folds. Seeing you like this, exposed just for her makes her want to ruin you. Now’s not the time for that though. “You’re so wet for me, just for me.” Her mouth is on your again, pressing kisses against your sensitive clit before she starts torturously slow licks.
“Just for you, Abby. . .” You assure her, you’re all dizzy with pleasure. Looking down at her with her mouth busy on your pussy is almost too much. You feel like you could cum already.
You push your hands into her hair, it’s slightly damp still from the shower, only in a messy ponytail instead of the braid she’s almost never seen without. Your fingers comb through the shorter strands that frame her face, pushing them back as she continues to eat you out like you’re her last meal. She’s so pretty you think your could cry. She looks like a painting while going down on you, the distinct slope of her nose and the thickness of her dark lashes. You almost want her to stop just so you can place kisses all over her face. Her focus on your clit becomes overwhelming for a moment and you inhale as your hands tighten in her blonde hair. She smells clean like soap and the moisturizer you left at her place. “God, please. . . I- It’s s’good.” You ramble like this when you’re getting close. The feeling of your manicured nails against her scalp is addictive. She loves when you pet her like this while she pleasures you.
“Gonna cum for me? Go ahead, my good girl.” She says with her lips moving against your pussy. She uses her fingers for the first time, but not to enter you. She glides them through the sticky mess she’s made of your cunt. “Want you to remember this,” She says. The tip of her middle finger slides right against your entrance, circling around a bit before slipping in. “Want you to remember I'm the only one who can get you this wet without even trying.” She moves her finger in and out a few times, the thickness of her digit driving you crazy. She leans down again. Pushing her tongue into your hole, replacing her finger with it. Your hips buck up, pushing yourself on her face and she doesn’t stop you. Only placing a large hand on your hip you guide you as she moves her tongue against your pussy. She's so good with her mouth, you feel jealous just thinking about whoever taught how to go down. You can hear your wetness, it's so obscene but you love it. It doesn't make you shy, just more desperate.
The room is unbearably hot now, you feel your shirt sticking to your skin with the thin sheen of sweat that’s covering you. As you get closer to your release, you move a hand up to your tits to touch your nipples, rubbing your fingers over them uncoordinatedly. Abby would help you if she wasn’t so focused on getting you to cum on her face. She knows that she’s the only one who can really touch you the way you need. but it’s cute to see your try.
“Abby, abby. . .” You chant, your words slurring a little bit.
“Go ahead, baby.” Your heart skips at the pet name.
When you cum, it wrecks you. A strangled noise escaping you as you arch into her touch. She doesn’t stop either, her fingers still moving against you as she watches your face intensely, not wanting to miss how pretty you are when you’re finishing for her. She leans up to press a kiss to your open mouth, which you return immediately, pulling her face against her’s the second you get your hands on her. You can taste yourself all over her mouth as she sucks at your tongue. Her hair falls over her face with how you've ruined it. The strands get in the way and she makes an aggravated grunt as she pushes them back again. You can barely keep up with her as she hovers over you, only pausing for a breath before she’s kissing you again. It feels like hours pass before you pull apart, both of you sweaty and tired out. You more than her of course.
“Missed you so much.” She tells you. You laugh a little, “I can tell.”
She looks down with a bashful smile, “Shut up.” If you weren’t so angelic looking in your fucked out state she’d shove you. “I’m never letting you push me away again.” She says. You can tell it’s a promise. You want her to keep it.
୨♡୧
You both fall asleep rather quickly. Abby’s arms around you, making you feel safe. The sun is just beginning to rise, bringing enough light into the room for you to see her discarded sweatpants on your floor and her hair tie on your nightstand. Abby is still asleep, you can tell by the slow rise and fall of her chest against you. Under the blanket your legs are tangled between hers and you can feel her breathing against the top of your head. When you both wake up you'll beg her to take you to the coffee shop on campus like you both love to do when you're not mad at eachother. Today would be one of those days.
Until then, you're content with just being with her in the serenity of it all. No matter how messed up it is, you know you’d rather fight with her everyday for the rest of your life than give this up.
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ur-local-anti-hero · 26 days
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Speak now (Marauders' version) Masterlist
Hi! this is the first time I'm posting in the Marauders fandom, and as my formal application I decided to write a series of different one-shots and drabbles based on Speak now :)
Therefore I present to you: Speak now (Marauders' version), in which each song has its own piece of writing for a diffent marauders era character.
Here is the masterlist, I'll be uploading it weekly, (at least once a week). First piece of writing will be up tomorrow.
Some clarifications: reader is fem! unless stated differently. English is not my first lenguage, so some mistakes are bound to happen, if you spot any don't hesitate to politely reach out.
If you want to be added to the taglist send me a message or ask!
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Mine - Remus x reader
Remus swears he's never been more in love. "Flash forwards and we're takin' on the word together, and there's a drawer of my thing at your place" "You are the best thing, That's ever been mine" Domestic fluff
Sparks fly - Sirius x Pure blood Slytherin!reader + What happened after.
Dating a Black was not the problem, the problem was that is Sirius, a known bloodtraitor. “I run my fingers through your hair and watch the lights go wild. Just keep on keeping your eyes on me, it's just wrong enough to make it feel right” Hurt/comfort
Back to december - Remus x reader
Remus feels like he will regret that night the rest of his life, the marauders convince him to do something about it. “So this is me swallowing my pride standing in front of you, Saying I'm sorry for that night" It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you. Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine” Hurt comfort, second chance romance
Speak now - James x Malfoy!reader
If the marauders are against something, its agaisnt pureblood families ideologies. Sometimes that implies to wreak havoc on a white veil occasion. “So don't say yes, run away now, I'll meet you when you're out of the church at the back door. Don't wait, or say a single vow, You need to hear me out” Hurt/comfort, Fluff, arranged marriage
Dear John - Regulus x reader
Maybe you should have listened to your best friend's warning about Regulus, you didn't. Now you just have to deal with the consequences. “Maybe it's you and your sick need To give love then take it away. And you'll add my name to your long list of traitors, Who don't understand" "And I'll look back and regret. I ignored when they said, "Run as fast as you can" Angst
Mean - Lily x reader
You had some words you'd like to say to Snape after he insulted the kindest girl you've ever met "All you are is mean. And a liar, and pathetic, and alone in life" Hurt/comfort
The story of us - Sirius x reader
Sometimes your relationship with Sirius looked like a contest of who could be more prideful, but this time it's gone too far and all you want is to have him back. "This is looking like a contest, of who can act like they care less. But I liked it more when you were on my side, the battle's in your hands now." Angst, fluff
Never grow up - Wolfstar x daughther!reader (No voldy au)
Remus and Sirius watch their daughter grow up and wish she could stay as their little girl forever. “Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple. I won't let nobody hurt you, won't let no one break your heart. And no one will desert you, Just try to never grow up, never grow up”  Fluff
Enchanted - Remus x reader (Soulmate au)
As soon as you saw him walking through the door you knew you'd love him forever. His first words only verified it. Your eyes whispered, "Have we met?". Across the room, your silhouette, Starts to make its way to me The playful conversation starts, Counter all your quick remarks Like passing notes in secrecy. And it was enchanting to meet you” Fluff
Better than revenge - James Potter x reader
Maybe fake dating your ex's best friend wasn't the best way of getting revenge "The story starts when it was hot and it was summer, and I had it all, I had him right there where I wanted him She came along, got him alone, and let's hear the applause She took him faster than you can say"Sabotage"" Fake dating
Innocent - Regulus x reader
After he realized what his parents have done Regulus can't help but breakdown, good thing you are there for him. “Did some things you can't speak of, But at night you live it all again. You wouldn't be shattered on the floor now, If only you had seen what you know now then" Hurt/comfort
Haunted - Remus x reader
Remus' worlds shifts entirely when his worst nightmare becomes true and he isn't sure if he is ever going to be able to look at you again when he is sure he has destroyed your life. “Something's gone terribly wrong, You're all I wanted.Come on, come on, don't leave me like this, I thought I had you figured out Can't breathe whenever you're gone, Can't turn back now, I'm haunted” angst hurt/comfort
Last Kiss - Sirius x reader
Breaking up with sirius was the hardest thing you've ever done. You can't help but miss the way his lips felt against yours. "I love how you walk with your hands in your pockets. How you'd kiss me when I was in the middle of saying something, There's not a day I don't miss those rude interruptions”  Angst
Long live - poly!Marauders x reader (Band!Au)
All your hard work as a band has led you and the boys to this moment, nominated as the best new artist and attending one of the most prestigius galas in the music industry. “I passed the pictures around, Of all the years that we stood there, On the sidelines wishing for right now When they gave us our trophies, And we held them up for our town, and The Cynics were outragedScreaming, "This is absurd!"” Fluff
Ours - James x reader (Band!Au)
When people start to comment on James' personality is your job to make sure he knows how much he means to everyone, but specifically how much he means to you. “So don't you worry your pretty, little mind. People throw rocks at things that shine And life makes love look hard, The stakes are high, the water's rough. But this love is ours”  Hurt/comfort
Superman - Remus x reader (Spiderman!Au)
Remus worries that his girlfriend will leave him when she learns the truth. You worry he is too oblivious to realize you already know. "I'll be right here on the ground, When you come back down. Tall, dark and beautiful. He's complicated, he's irrational, But I hope someday he'll take me away, And save the day fluff
From the vault tracks
Electric touch - Sirius x reader (College!Au)
Your friends are tired of telling you that he is going to break your heart. You'd let Sirius gamble with your heart as long as the chance of hapiness is there. “All I know is this could either break my heart or bring it back to life. Got a feelin' your electric touch could fill this ghost town up with life And I want you now, wanna need you forever. In the heat of your electric touch”
When Emma falls in love - James x reader
You navigate what's like to be in love with James 'Cause when Emma falls in love, she's in it for keeps She won't walk away unless she knows she absolutely has to leave” fluff Hurt/comfort
I can see you - Remus x reader
As much as you hated him, you couldn't deny his natural charm and the way he seemed to have a magnetic field around him that made you gravitate towards him, once and once again. “Passed me a note sayin’, "Meet me tonight", Then we kiss and you know I won't ever tell. And I could see you being my addiction, You can see me as a secret mission. Hide away and I will start behaving myself" Rivals to lover
Castles crumbling - Regulus x reader (Royal Au)
You loved him more than anything, you were the best thing that ever happened to him. But your love is impossible and forbidden. When he doesn't have anything left he runs to you, wondering if you'll love him now. “And I feel like my castle's crumbling down And I watch all my bridges burn to the ground And you don't want to know me, I will just let you down You don't wanna know me now” Hurt/comfort, forbidden romace, fluff
Foolish one - Peter x reader
Peter is used to being the second chance, but he can't help but feel betrayed when his bestfriend and crush starts to get closer to Sirius. "Foolish one, Stop checking your mailbox for confessions of love That ain't never gonna come You will learn the hard way instead of just walkin' out" Hurt/comfort
Timeless - James x reader (Soulmate!Au)
James and you are fated to find each other in every life you live. "Cause I believe that we were supposed to find this, So even in a different life You still would've been mine. We would've been timeless" Fluff
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saerins · 2 months
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PREV: #003 THE FIRST RIPPLE 𖧧 #004 THIS SPARK, IS IT REAL? 𖧧 NEXT: #005 THE ICE SURRENDERS ꒰ series masterlist ꒱
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꒰ঌꨄ︎໒꒱ — there’s a lot you don’t understand about what’s going on with sae, but he can say the same about you. question is, once you both find out more about each other, will your growing feelings stay the same?
content: itoshi sae x female reader. fluff/angst. profanity, alcohol, reader is fairly straightforward here, pining, jealousy, misunderstandings. word count: 5.8k
༝༚༝༚ slightly shorter chapter this week ^_^ hehe we’re getting closer to the messier/exciting parts so bear with me heh :) mwah ily guys <3
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you’re starting to learn that maybe you can’t get your hopes up with itoshi sae.
a week later, you don’t hear anything from him. you both haven’t spoken since that night he took you out. not that you’re entirely too bothered—it’s a first for you, trying to get to know someone as in-demand as sae. (you don’t count eita because you’ve known him since before the fame.)
it doesn’t help that you don’t really have anyone to talk to about this. you promised sae that you wouldn’t spill, and you’re keeping that promise. somehow, it makes you feel a little warm inside; thinking that there is some sort of intimacy you share with sae that only the two of you know.
besides, even if you could talk to eita about it, you don’t want to. 
is it too quick for you to think you might fall for him?
falling for someone isn’t really in your life plans yet, especially after your last and only tumultuous relationship, but maybe itoshi sae is different. he sure seems like it.
the next week rolls around, and you still hear nothing from him. which is fine with you; you’ve resigned yourself to thinking what’s yours will be yours and not to force anything… even if you spend most of your idle time wondering if sae is ever going to post anything on his private account. did he really just create it solely because you asked him to?
you can see that he logs in to it, judging by his icon on that little viewer list in your stories. but that’s the extent to which you see him online. he doesn’t reply, or do anything much. considering his normal account is probably mainly run by his team, you guess you shouldn’t expect too much from him.
still, maybe it’s a little pathetic of you to be wearing his cap so frequently. it’s sort of become a staple piece for you, somehow. to be fair, there’s hardly any dress code in place for you to follow and considering the bulk of your workwear is mostly casual, it fits right into your style. although, after sumi pointed out one day that it’s a luxury brand and that it costs more than you would personally ever spend on a cap (even if you had the means to), you try to wear it less often. (though that seems like a waste considering it was given to you.)
“you know, you gave the boss a really good scoop, enough to last for a few months,” sumi points out during lunch, taking a lick of her vanilla ice cream as the both of you sit out on the roof, escaping the cramped office. “so why do you look so stressed?”
honestly, you didn’t even realise you did. you thought you were being normal, but it has been a while since you had a normal crush on someone, and since itoshi sae is certainly not just a normal somebody, maybe you had been acting a little off, always waiting for a text, a call even, something.
“nothing, i just haven’t been able to get a good sleep lately,” you lie, hoping that sumi won’t pry.
she doesn’t.
“hm, it’s friday today,” she hums, pondering. “maybe you should find a few of your friends, get out, let loose, you know?”
later at your desk, the clock almost striking 5pm, you think maybe you should. because as much as you love your chill friday nights alone (mainly because your mom is barely home on the weekends), you don’t think it’ll do you much good if you keep mulling over the same old thing.
but just as you’re about to go pester eita again, he gets to you first, his timing impeccable today.
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there’s an aching disappointment in your chest when you realise sae isn’t going to be there. maybe it’s just the glaring difference between the life of a celebrity versus someone normal like you. his schedule must usually be packed to the brim after all.
whatever, you’ll let him come back to you on his own time. for now, all you want to do for the weekend is to spend it having fun with the guys and settling everything you need to on saturday and spend sunday to yourself.
this possible thing between you and sae, whatever it could be, can wait. you’re not in any rush. at least, that’s what your head tells you.
your heart feels something different.
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it’s only the second time you’re actually hanging out with eita’s friends, but you’re not regretting it one bit. even on the day of the event they’d been welcoming to you, and tonight is no exception.
they’re all sat around the wooden table on the balcony, a ton of beer cans and liquor bottles littered across the table. you sit on the long end, on the long chair, right beside eita, sides of your bodies always pressed close together that it makes a glint form in oliver’s eyes.
he’s still curious, not out of concern but just because, about you and eita and sae and how everything is going to tie together. it’s not everyday he sees eita being okay with a girl that close to him and not complain that she’s a bother. it’s also not everyday that sae creates a private account. oliver got bored and saw one day that you were the first person he followed.
you must really be something.
“where even is sae today?” you hear sendou ask, a hiccup following suit. “i finally come over and he’s not even here.”
he’s sitting on your other side, his profile strangely reminding you of the very guy he’s asking about. maybe it’s the way his hair is a lighter shade of pink, maybe even his sharp jawline. his eyes are different though, more expressive, and universally soft somehow.
you remember how sae’s can look soft, his teal eyes turning gentle whenever you try to approach him. but it wasn’t that way when you first met him, that’s a given.
“i don’t know, said he was too tired,” oliver sighs, stretching in his seat.
“wasn’t he just with bianca yesterday?” yukimiya asks, oblivious to oliver’s glee.
it kind of stings, but you stay quiet, the alcohol slowly seeping into your system. you can feel eita leaning against you a little bit more, and his presence has always been comforting, so you let him.
sendou hums, index finger tapping against his near-empty beer can. “is that still going on? how long has their relationship status been a mystery already?”
karasu snorts, nudging sendou on the elbow. “salty just ‘cause you tried to ask her out and she rejected you?”
as you sit quietly and observe, it seems that sendou was once at an event with her too—apparently, he had asked her for her number and she didn’t even want to give it to him. and then a month later she “met sae and was all over him”, according to karasu.
with the exception of eita, who sits quietly beside you, they start a debate on whether or not sae’s finally starting to see bianca in a different light. or, as sendou points out, “maybe they’ve been a thing all along and just hid it really well from everyone.” it’s not exactly something you want to listen to, even if you are the most curious you’ve ever been about a guy, so you block it out from your ears. 
but oliver leans forward, resting his chin on the liquor bottle in front of him, staring straight at you. you’ve never really noticed it but his eyes are really beautiful, the different shades of green and purple making him seem ethereal just like that. 
“you’re a girl, y/n, what do you think?” he asks you, a lazy drawl in his tone.
mirroring his actions, you bat your eyelashes at him, looking innocent as ever when you answer him. “i think you guys should stop talking about that her behind her back like that,” you say, earning a raise of oliver’s brows in return. he’s surprised, to say the least, but not in a bad way.
it’s not even that you don’t want to hear about her. you’re wantonly curious, especially since you’re beginning to realise your small hint of emotions towards sae, but something tells you that these guys wouldn’t be too kind with their words if you egg them on.
karasu gives you a nod of approval that you miss before he leans back in the chair, whispering to yukimiya, “at least we all know shidou won’t totally hate y/n.” but it’s too soft for you to hear, and you probably won’t even be able to make sense of it even if you did, not with the gradually increasing level of alcohol in your system.
between intentionally drinking to not be a pathetic mess who keeps thinking about her potential love life and having to drink because you’re usually good at drinking games but not when oliver is around with the way he keeps beating you at everything, you happen not to notice a lot of things.
at one point, oliver has replaced sendou next to you, whispering snarky comments in your ear in between games. he’s not the flirting kind, at least not to you, and he doesn’t push your boundaries physically either—he’s more akin to a friend you’d love to gossip with. that’s why you don’t even think much when he tilts his camera towards you, taking a selfie with both you and eita in it.
just a normal picture of friends hanging out, oliver leaning against your legs, propped up on the chair, your own head leaning into the crook of eita’s neck, all of you evidently tipsy from the dazed look in your eyes.
what neither of you notice is oliver’s smirk as he posts the picture onto his private, betting on his target audience of one to see it.
and now, he’ll just have to wait.
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one hour later, the doorbell rings and yukimiya’s eyes glance over to eita, comfortable with an arm around you, and he takes it as his cue to open the door. eita’s probably too reluctant to move and he’ll let whoever it is at the door keep at it for hours before he’ll answer the poor guy.
he’s expecting some random food delivery, maybe from karasu because he’s been whining about wanting some chicken with his beer, or maybe even shidou showing up at the last minute from his other party. but this? the person he’s staring at in the eyes right now, is the last person he expected to see tonight. 
“wait, i thought you weren’t coming?” yukimiya asks, but oliver’s already shouting from the balcony.
“hey, sae, what the fuck are you doing here?” he asks from the balcony, taking a swig of his beer.
beside him, you hear sae’s name and your head immediately whips around to look at the door. there he is, looking tired as ever but he’s there, in the flesh, dressed in all black, jacket and sweats, teal eyes finding you from all the way across the house.
sae wordlessly walks past yukimiya, the latter following behind him, still shocked that he’s even present. sure looks like sae always means it when he says he wouldn’t come to gatherings like these.
when he gets to the balcony, earning a cock of oliver’s brow, sae tilts his head, “i was invited, wasn’t i? what’s so surprising about that?”
oliver snickers at sae’s blatant avoidance of the question. deciding he wouldn’t get anything out of him anyway, he shrugs and accepts it. besides, he can already see that sae’s too busy trying to calculate if there’s enough space for him to sit beside you, with the way his eyes are scanning your surroundings. maybe it doesn’t help how eita’s so clingy with you, his arm still around you even when you’ve already straightened up.
both sae and eita are just staring blankly at each other, and everyone is aware of it except for you, because your head’s a little dizzy and you’re still thinking whether sae popping up here is a figment of your imagination.
you’re not that drunk, are you?
you get your answer when a shadow looms over your body, the familiar scent of his cologne wafting into your nose. he smells the same he did that night you kissed him.
“what, this seat taken?” sae asks, and you dumbly look down at the small edge of space beside you.
no, it’s not, but you’re probably going to have to squeeze between him and eita if he sits there, no more legroom. you shift anyway, eita making space (albeit reluctantly), the way sae ends up being so close to you enough to send your mind into overdrive. you’re still wondering why he showed up.
you, and everyone else. not oliver though. he knows why. and it’s not like he wants to intentionally make you cough out your feelings but it looks like the other guys who are oblivious to your feelings are steering in that direction. 
“no bianca today?” karasu asks, a mocking tone in his voice.
sae doesn’t show an ounce of emotion, though. “wasn’t with her.”
“why not? scared we’re gonna make you two make out again like last time?” yukimiya asks, finally relaxing back in his seat. he says it jokingly, although you know the sentence at hand probably isn’t a joke.
“wait wait wait, you two made out?” sendou asks, incredulous, mirroring your exact thoughts. 
a jealousy creeps up your spine, engulfing your alcohol-riddled distractions. some part of you wants to know what it’d be like to be kissed by him. you purse your lips into a firm line, wondering if you were being an accidental homewrecker by kissing him that night.
“it was just a game,” sae responds, making no moves to drink the beer handed to him.
eita pulls his arms away, moving in favour of getting you a drink. it’s not that he even knows anything that’s going on between you and sae, but he can tell by how you’re stiffening up that you’re probably a little affected. he slides a shot over to you, and you down it with ease.
ignoring the way the other guys keep harping on the topic, sae turns his attention to you, flicking the tip of the cap he gave you, and you shift your gaze to look up at him, the small smirk he gives you when you do making your heart flutter again.
why is it so easy for him to do that to you?
“haven’t sold my cap yet?”
you thank the heavens you’re not too tipsy to be normal. “i’m holding out for higher bids, actually,” you quip, grinning. “you can offer one too if you want it back.”
sae hums, head tilted again as he ponders while staring at you. slowly, he leans down to your ear, whispering so only you can hear him, “how much do i have to bid for you to keep it?”
maybe it’s the liquor, but you feel your cheeks heat up. it can’t be his close proximity. it can’t be the way he’s so close that you can see the beating pulse on his neck. it can’t be the way you think you look more intimate here than you should. definitely can’t be the way all the guys have noticed and are giving each other looks.
why does he even want you to keep it? is this some sort of abstract way that he’s using to tell you that you’re not an accidental homewrecker?
you make a mental reminder to yourself to never get drunk in front of sae. you don’t want to end up blurting out some less-than-decent thoughts of yours.
“what’s wrong? too tipsy now to talk back?” sae asks, and you can only pout at him, not in your usual condition to think of smart comebacks. it makes the corner of his lips tug upwards just a little bit more than usual, his hand coming up to teasingly push the cap down further—in that seemingly affectionate way he does.
and maybe it isn’t such a good idea to agree to continue to play games, not when you got roped into never have i ever and karasu, to the delight of oliver, said he has never fucked anyone at this table. seeing that only you and eita put a finger down, everyone can tell there’s probably a complicated history between you and eita. not that you owe them any explanation, though you kind of do feel the urge to tell sae that it was in the past.
you steal a glance at him beside you, the mild look of surprise befallen on his handsome face. you wonder if he thinks badly of you now. you wonder if he’ll think badly of you when he sees what your life is really like. will he think you’re just going to be a stain on his fancy life that it’ll be better off not knowing you?
or maybe… maybe he has a complicated past too. with bianca.
funnily enough, eita loses after yukimiya says he’s never had sex with more than five girls. the disappointing part is you didn’t really get to know anything interesting about sae.
“hey, you feeling okay? you can stop playing if you wanna,” sae tells you later on, after god knows how many minutes have passed and you’re already onto the next game. you don’t even know why you agreed to play two truths one dare in the first place when you know it’ll just be a shitshow for you. 
over the course of x minutes, you’d managed to learn many things, some of which being that karasu and eita had shared a girl in bed, that yukimiya dared to do a body shot on oliver, that sae would consider bianca an important person to him, and that you really can’t make up your mind to go big or go home because oliver had just dared you to spend seven minutes in heaven with anyone of your choosing.
of course, you can safely choose eita and trust him not to do anything if you told him to. but on the flip side, you can choose who you really want. even if you’re not so sure he’d want to anymore.
“you can always choose me,” oliver jokes, lifting the mood. although the smirk on his face makes you question it. “i’ll definitely show you a good time.”
while you’re having an internal dilemma, karasu and sendou are in the background teasing oliver for being fake, saying that he shouldn’t be offering that if he’s already interested in miss manager.
but you snap out of it when the irritated sigh you hear out of sae somehow feels like the world is sending you a sign. in some way. you’re not sure if you’re reaching—is he bothered by oliver’s comments? and why does oliver look so smug all of a sudden?
you’re beginning to regret not being sober, you can’t figure this shit out. but what you do figure out is what you want to do. why think so much about tomorrow when the present is right here?
so you don’t pay it any more thoughts, getting up and dragging sae with you by the shirt, ignoring all the commotion left behind by the guys, save for eita who only stares blankly at you as you drag sae into his own room and lock the door.
“oh shit, sorry dude, didn’t mean to—”
“for the last time, just friends,” otoya snaps, cutting karasu off, although not even sendou believes him. for someone who doesn’t even care to treat people nicely, sendou can at least see that eita treats you a fair bit better than anyone else.
in the room, sae can only watch blankly as you stumble over your feet before finally settling on the edge of otoya’s bed. the envious, green side of him can’t help but wonder how many times you’d been here, in his room, with him. though it’s kind of amusing how you chose to bring sae in here now.
from what sae can tell, you’re probably a little more tipsy than you should be in these types of situation, and a part of him is relieved that you’re not here with anyone else. if you were here with otoya, would you be fooling around by now?
“so, thought you were too tired to show up—what happened?” you ask from where you are on the bed, body swaying slightly, eyes threatening to close.
the moment he takes a seat next to you, you lean close, your head coming to rest on his shoulder, and sae has no doubt that you’d already drank a lot before he came. proximity this close, he can smell the shampoo in your hair, can feel how soft it is.
“i couldn’t sleep, got bored, that’s all.”
your shoulders vibrate slightly as you giggle, pulling away, a suspicious glint in your eyes. “damn, and here i thought you came for me.”
even when you’re intoxicated you still have such a smart mouth. sae shrugs, his gaze turning ever so soft, like every time before when he looks at you. there’s something about you that he can’t quite place, something that makes him act so differently than he usually does, and for once he doesn’t hate it. “did you want me to?”
not taking the bait, you keep up your casual demeanour, even if your eyelids feel heavy and you’re about five seconds away from just passing right out on the bed.
“you know, it’s fine to say you missed me and wanted to see me,” you tell him, grin wide as ever, almost infectious. you’re only surviving on liquid courage right now, the way you unashamedly try to flirt. though, if sae isn’t moving away, does that mean he doesn’t mind?
he looks off to the side, pondering for a while before turning back to you with a straight face, “i missed you, wanted to see you.”
for a moment, you feel like your heart might stop.
“is that what you wanna hear?”
almost instinctively, you grab the stray pillow lying on the bed and fling it at sae, earning an amused laugh from him but you barely realise it, too caught up in the frustration that his words were just strung together to entertain you as opposed to his actual feelings.
crossing your arms, you look away, the exhaustion of the day coupled with the dread of tomorrow nipping away at your consciousness. “don’t patronise me, itoshi sae,” you huff, and you miss the way he looks at you with a smile on his face.
will you remember any of this tomorrow? you’re not drunk, but you’re not exactly thinking straight either.
“were you… very busy this past week?”
your question is voiced so softly, almost like you’re afraid to ask, and sae realises maybe he should’ve at least told you he wouldn’t be able to make it as early as he thought he would.
“yeah, i was.”
technically, he isn’t lying. he was back in japan last saturday, but maybe he had been too wrapped up in his thoughts to do anything else.
“with bianca?”
it’s even softer this time, and for some reason, sae’s almost kind of relieved you’re asking. he just doesn’t know what it is.
“no, not really,” he tells you. it’s complicated, and you don’t even have context; he wouldn’t even know where to begin talking to you about it.
you put your legs up on the bed, hiding your face between your knees, and sae’s left wondering whether alcohol really makes that much of a difference. you seem bold, shy and teasing all at once. his hat is still on your head, your thoughts coming out into the open.
“are you… involved with her?” your voice is muffled, but he hears you loud and clear.
a small smile dawns onto his face, safe from your view. he doesn’t really know the implications of you asking the question, but he likes how you don’t beat around the bush. it’s nice not having to constantly guess what you really mean.
and maybe it’s you rubbing off on him, but he doesn’t answer it straight.
“curious, y/n?”
when you lift your head up to look at him, you see the widest smile he’s ever given you, objectively much smaller and way more subtle than everyone else, but it’s a smile all the same and it makes your heart beat faster in your chest.
“yes,” you answer honestly, because you’re not sure when exactly you’re going to pass out but you have a feeling it’ll be soon and eita’s bed is just so soft.
sae is only mildly stunned by how straightforward you are, so he decides to do you a favour. he doesn’t usually like divulging things like this; topics that bring gossip and are undoubtedly going to come back to him if it gets out. what’s more, you work for a sports magazine so you can totally use this against him, but it isn’t even that you’re intoxicated right now, but more so that he feels he can trust you with it.
slowly, he reaches his hand over, and for once he tips the cap upwards a little so he can see your eyes when he tells you, “stupid, i’m not involved with anyone.” is that clear enough for you? he’s not sure why but he hopes it is.
what does he even want with you?
the moment you hear it, you break out into a wide smile, genuine and actually infectious this time because sae feels the corners of his lips threatening to pull upwards even more. what the heck is this feeling?
“really? i’m so relieved,” you exhale, voice a little airy, looking a little too pretty that sae immediately pulls the cap back downwards. “so,” you move on, adjusting it back in position, daring to move closer to him, face so close to his own that he has nowhere else to look except straight into your eyes. “we have four minutes left. will you grant me whatever i want, itoshi sae?”
you have a habit of calling him by his full name. he makes a mental reminder to get you to change that. not tonight though, he doesn’t want you to forget.
it’s weird how he feels around you; why does he feel so overwhelmed yet want more both at the same time? he swallows the lump in his throat, keeping his composure, “depends, you’re pretty demanding, tell me first and i’ll consider.”
“itoshi sae, i’m not!” you refute, punching him playfully on the arm and he has to hold your arm to stop you from falling off the bed. “i don’t know. the guys outside are probably expecting us to fuck or something.”
there you go, unfiltered and he kind of likes it. his fingers are still around your wrist.
but the answer is crystal clear to him.
“no.”
“huh?” it takes you a while to process. given that the only thoughts in your head as of right now are only: what does sae think of you and eita? and bianca is important to him. “what if it was just a kiss?”
he hums, then shakes his head. “nope.”
“wait, am i not pretty enough for you or something?”
you’re whining and sae finds it cute of all things. you have a tendency to misunderstand, so maybe he needs to adjust how he talks to you. he’ll see. but before he can even say anything else, your head falls into his chest, your regular breathing the only sound that fills the room after. he’s perplexed and amused all at once; how did you manage to fall asleep so quickly?
contrary to your thoughts, sae has always thought you were pretty, ever since the first night he met you. even in your private account where you post yourself in hoodies too big for your body and no makeup, clad in sweats—still pretty.
sae sighs, his fingers stroking your hair now that you’re asleep, and whispering in your ear only when you’re not able to hear him.
“if i do that, i think i’ll end up wanting more.” and you’re drunk and that’s not what he really wants.
but he does give you what you ask for, pressing a soft kiss on your forehead.
that’ll have to do for now.
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“so, nothing happened?” sendou asks, bored, as sae carries you on his back as he comes out of the room.
you’re passed out and drooling on his shoulder and he doesn’t really care about that.
“it’s sae, c’mon, did you expect something?” karasu laughs, all of them coming in from the balcony because in the seven minutes both of you had spent in the room, it managed to start raining. “maybe if it was bianca, y’know, then maybe.”
sae ignores all their passing comments, choosing to walk over to otoya, “hey, she passed out, i’m just gonna take her home.”
as much as sae isn’t particularly fond of otoya, he’s probably your closest friend here and he doesn’t want him to think he’s just going to take advantage of you.
otoya’s green eyes flicker to the clock on the wall before he shakes his head, speaking softly so the others won’t hear. “nah, just put her in the guest bedroom. i’ll send her back in the morning. you can head back first.”
there’s an irritation that builds up inside him, but sae maintains his emotionless expression, remembering that otoya knows you much more than he does. “i could just—”
“she doesn’t want to go home tonight,” otoya cuts in, a warning glare in his eyes. “trust me.”
suddenly, sae remembers the last time he met you, your swollen cheek and the way your eyes were glazed over. and he wants to ask otoya what it’s all about but this is about you, and he really shouldn’t ask someone else.
“fine,” sae concedes. if whatever’s at home makes you miserable, he won’t bring you there. “i’ll put her in there before i go.”
there’s a lot more otoya would like to ask sae, because oliver’s not the only one curious at sae’s seemingly odd behaviour. he wants to know what exactly he thinks about you, but everyone’s still around and it’s not a good time, so he sucks it up and lets it go for tonight.
as sae puts you down on the bed and pulls the blanket over you, he gets a brief flashback of the night he set bianca down in her hotel room. you’re both so similar, and yet not at all.
and when he’s about to turn and go, your fingers reach out to tug at the hem of his jacket sleeve, almost effectively making sae’s heart leap out of his chest. your eyes are still shut, so there’s no chance you’re actually conscious right now. still, your mouth opens.
“stay with me?”
sae stills. do you know it’s him? or do you think he’s otoya? either way, you and bianca really are similar, even when you’re not completely awake. so why… why are his reactions so different?
it’s not like he has anything on tomorrow, so it’s really no imposition.
before he knows it, he’s sitting on the floor, right next to where you sleep on the bed, your fingers enveloped in his palm, his head propped on the mattress, his own exhaustion catching up to him.
it’s been a messy week; trying to gather his thoughts about you every single time he’s free, having to talk to bianca and thinking about that, and then coming back just to see oliver and otoya so close to you that it bothers him a little. finding out about you and otoya takes the cake, though.
how special is otoya to you?
the question lingers unanswered as he drifts to sleep, both of you subconsciously finding comfort in the other’s innocent warmth.
the next morning when you wake up, you’re half shocked half happy to find sae where he is, sleeping there peacefully, the previous night’s exhaustion dissipating from his face.
did he take care of you last night? you can only hope you didn’t puke in front of him. that would be embarrassing.
you’d like to stay, wait for him to wake up and talk to him and make sure you didn’t say or do anything too out of line because your memory’s a little foggy, bits and pieces that you can’t quite piece together or even tell if they’re real or dreams.
but you can’t.
you remember what day it is today and reluctantly get out of bed. though, feeling a little cheeky, you quietly grab a small black marker out of the drawer, suppressing a grin as you scribble on sae’s palms, hoping he won’t wake up from this.
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a couple hours later, by the time sae gets up, the bed is cold and still undone. it’s already noon, and somehow the first thing he thinks of when he wakes up is you—are you already home? did otoya send you?
but the question that pops up in the forefront of his mind when he sees otoya lazing around on his couch later on is none of that.
and to be fair, otoya has the very same question in his head.
“do you like her or something? y/n.”
otoya is the one to ask, eyes still glued onto his phone screen, typing something out. sae can’t help but wonder if he’s talking to you. 
“what’s it to you?” sae asks. he can hear the snores of the other guys coming from otoya’s room.
otoya shrugs. “just curious. she’s my best friend after all.”
there’s a certain possessiveness in the way he says it that rubs sae the wrong way. still, sae supposes that if otoya’s your best friend, he shouldn’t be too impulsive with his words.
“maybe i like her,” sae says, the tension in the air getting thicker.
“in what way?” otoya still hasn’t looked up from his phone.
“same way you do.”
“i don’t know what you mean.”
otoya scoffs, both of them acting coy with one another. “bianca and y/n, huh? busy guy,” otoya sighs, tossing his phone aside and getting up, walking towards sae, hands in his pocket. both of them are staring the other down, feeling the situation out. “i think i suit y/n better, you can have bianca.”
now it’s sae’s turn to scoff, sharp eyes piercing through otoya’s own. “why don’t we let y/n decide for herself, huh?” he quips, before grabbing his car keys out of his pocket and leaving through the front door.
as he settles down in his car and turns the engine on, it’s only then that he realises the black marks on his palm. 
thank you ᡣ𐭩
somehow, just one look at it is enough to ease the tension on his shoulders.
you really can do wonders.
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extras !
otoya’s hostility towards sae was intentional.
sae didn’t try to wash your writing off—he let it fade away naturally.
if yn was sober, she would’ve not been as straightforward as he was in the room with sae. but she definitely would’ve flustered sae a lot more with her playful personality.
the whole time, oliver was live recounting the events of the night to miss manager, all of which are left on read.
if bianca had been there, sae would have been a lot more cautious about his actions and probably wouldn’t have acted too close to y/n.
random fact #1: otoya plays bass, used to perform in a band back in university. part of how he got so many girls interested in him but he was always with y/n which made a lot of them unhappy.
random fact #2: sae has never really been jealous before so now that he’s feeling it, he’s a lot more sensitive to it than normal people.
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taglist! @yuzurins @saeskiss @raphsimp @lust4rin @mxplesyrvp @chieeeeeee @yumekolovesyukimiya @kunirayuna39 @auranny @sereniteav @gskill @saesgrl @riseena @rikijbol @sagejin @shironagi @veecynii
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igotanidea · 9 months
Text
Walk down memory lane : AK!Jason Todd x fem!reader
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Warnings: mention of self harm and suicidal thoughts.
You can find other AK!stories on point 4 here: Jason Todd masterlist
***
She was just so tired.
Tired of fighting, of keeping up that fucking hope, of carrying the excessive weight on her shoulders.
She just couldn’t anymore .
Maybe it was time to finally accept that Jason didn’t care about her. That he would never care again. Not in the same way he used to before all this shit hit them. Before Joker, Harley, Arkham…
But she still needed, wanted, craved his love.
But how long can a girl be strong and live in a delusion?
And for the first time in a year she started crying.
What Harley could not achieve, happened because of a boy. No amount of torture and mind games and tricks she was subject to in Arkham, not once broke her. But the indifference and cold treatment from her former boyfriend, the one who she still loved got her on her knees, sobbing and shaking on the bed in her little, cold Asylum cell.
He was right. She was completely alone, no one was coming to help her, safe her from that void that finally found a way straight to her heart. Nothing more than a playtoy, unlovable, weak, pathetic, developing a heavy case of Stockholm syndrome.
Poor girl hugged herself in a foul attempt to calm down, but it was for nothing. Tears were falling freely down her cheeks, turning her into a puddle of emotions she couldn’t hold back. It was like the old wound and the feeling of being used opened and uncovered all the layers she cut off before.
Some people call it trauma, but she couldn’t care less about the terminology.
Maybe it would be better to just end her own life right now just so she wouldn’t have to suffer through another day of such lousy existence. It was Arkham, she was pretty sure she would find something to help her execute her plan.
On shaking legs she stood up from the bed, moving towards the bathroom. The mirror that Jason broke violently after their last encounter was still not fixed and the sharp pieces of glass poked on every side.
Perfect.
Gathering all the strength she had left, she reached towards the splinter and pointed it towards her wrist, assessing the “best” place to cut……
***
She woke up feeling sore and in tremendous amount of pain like never before. Both of her wrists were patched up with the clean bandages and she wasn’t even in her own sweatbox. Honestly, she couldn’t for the love of God recognise the place where she was, until the familiar, slightly muffled voice threw her off her confused state and brought back to reality.
“WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING?!” Jason hissed with unconcealed anger and she shivered. “WHAT WERE YOU TRYING TO DO!?” in a blink of an eye he was right next to her, grabbing her chin and forcing her eyes up.  
She was just completely silent, the tight grip of his fingers on her puffy, hurting cheeks causing a few more tears to flow down her eyes.
“I’m sorry…..” she whispered, slightly panicking. He was never supposed to find her, let alone to save her. And why did he? Was it only because he needed her for release in the future? “I’m sorry…..” her whole body shook violently.
“Y/N…….” her name in his mouth sounded almost sweet and the touch got far more gentle, sudden change in behaviour making her freeze. What was going on?
“I……” her mouth fell agape and it was impossible to say a word.
“Did you forget what I told you last time? You’re mine. You can’t just go and decide to hurt yourself this way. I cannot allow it.”
“Why?” she sobbed “it’s not like you care. I am just a reminder of the past, of all those lies you were fed by Batman and your family. Of someone you once were and could never be again.”
“Stop it!”
“Please, please, just let me go. Just let me finish it, please.” Her desperation and panic attack coming out in waves in the form of the aggressive tugging on the dressing, trying to reopen the stitched wounds and cuts. “I’ll do it myself. You won’t even have to lift a finger.”
“Stop it!’
“You can even watch it, I know you’ll enjoy the show. You wanted a show, didn’t you?”
“FOR FUCK’S SAKE STOP IT!” finally he managed to get a hold of her hands, pinning them down to her sides, precluding her from moving, even though she still struggled against his hold.  “Is that what you think of me? That I will enjoy that?”  she nodded shakily “fuck!”
“I’m sorry…..” she whimpered again. She was still here and he was now mad which could only equal to another punishment. And this time it was not going to be intimate. He could really hurt her at any time.
“Baby…..” he whispered, almost without thinking, closing his eyes “princess.”
“Wha….. what did you say?” her eyes grew wide. Did he really use those words or was it just an imagination?
Jason was completely inside his head now, memories flooding his brain like a fucking Niagara. He remembered the past. The moment, when while still being Robin, someone came after her, attacking her and almost eliminating her from the equation. He recalled the hours spend in the medical bay, watching her pale face and the heart rate monitor, praying to whatever entity was up there to bring her back to him. All those little heart attacks caused each time she took a sharp exhale. Falling asleep next to her bed, holding and caressing her cold hand, whispering pleas and promises to keep her safe in the future if she just woke up. Brushing up on how he felt when she finally opened her e/c eyes, looking at him with so much love and concern, asking if he was all right.
He remembered how she cared about him…..  And how he cared about her.
“Ja…. Jace?” she swallowed the lump in her throat, taking the risk to use his nickname, ready for another anger fit, but instead she met his honest gaze, so different from the one she was used to in his Arkham Knight version.
“Don’t ever do this again.” He gasped, brushing her cheek, putting a strand of hair behind her ear “you hear me?  Ever.”
“Jason?” he bottom lip trembled because of that sudden display of emotion from his part.
“Ever.” He emphasised.  “I don’t want to see you in pain.”
“Ok……”
“Anyone who hurt you deserve a punishment and that applies to you hurting yourself. Is that clear?”
“Anyone, but you?” she blurt without thinking and immediately covered her mouth in fear of the words that came out her mouth.
Jason tensed a bit, his muscles flexing but he didn’t move.
“Get some rest. Need you recovered soon. Big plans for you.” He just said and with one final look into her eyes left the room, leaving her completely speechless.
…..
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mariacrow · 9 months
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TFP Decepticons x reader
✶ relationship headcanons ✶
I know no one asked for this and that there are requests in my inbox but rewatching TFP got my inspiration and ideas all over the place :’)
THIS ONE IS LONG 💀 (that’s what she said-)
2nd person
female reader
how you’d get together, confession
how you’d function together, PDA
intimacy, preferences (NSFW)
how long would it last
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MEGATRON
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OOF.
As your lord he would treat you as one of his servants, nothing less, nothing more
Knowing he’s intrigued by you and not denying it, he would give you more difficult tasks (mostly in the lab because you’re SM0LL)
All you’d get from him is bare minimum praising but oh how you’d blush and melt nevertheless would make him smirk and snicker
He’d definitely be bossier when it comes to you just because he wants to dominate you in any possible way
As time would pass he would get more intimate with you in private, perhaps a little touchy
It would all start with rough sex, him pounding you into the control panel, make you stain it with your bitter sweet juices as he’d make you scream his name- okishouldstop-
Anywho, that would be the “confession”. More like making you moan out YOUR confession
As your relationship would develop, he’d make you seem as his personal pet, he’d even call you pet names
He’s very possessive and protective, hence PDA in this case would be making you follow him around the warship all the time, carry you and be a little touchy at times just to make sure you’re still his. He’d protect you at all costs and maybe even panic when you’re in danger
When he wants to do it, you will do it, be that the control room, the lab, in the hallway against the wall, on the floor, it doesn’t matter. You will take him when he wants it the way he wants it
He’s into dirty talk, also loves when you beg and scream his name or call him lord or master
He doesn’t like making a mess so he’d always scold you when you’d make one or when he’d fill you up to the brim and make a puddle underneath, always blaming it on you
Actually loves when you’re a playful brat and disobey him so he can punish you
At times you feel like his sex toy but he’d prove to you that you’re much more
It’s just the way he functions, he’s evil after all but definitely loyal to the core
You’re either his forever or you shall perish
🩶
STARSCREAM
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EW.
He’d pretend he’s annoyed by you all the time, pretend he hates you the most as if you’re his blood enemy
In fact he’s very jealous when he sees you looking at anyone else or God forbid TALK WITH THEM
Once he wouldn’t be able to take it anymore, he’d angrily drag you somewhere where you’re alone. First he’d take a deep breath and almost cry as he’d confess to you
He’d beg you to be his, he’d kneel in front of you and kiss your hands and cry his feelings out as well as apologize for treating you like scrap
In the relationship he’d be into that master and kitten stuff, he’d even call you kitten (cringe imo)
He is into PDA just so he could brag how you’re finally his
He’d act all dominant and make you refer to him as master, as well as during the freaky time but if you’re a switch or a dom, he can easily become a sub and squirm and whimper
After he’d totally embarrass himself with begging you to let him cum, he’d deny it and pretend nothing happened
When he’s dom, he can be very nasty and sloppy. Definitely a dirty talker, also likes to hear you beg
He’s very easily offended BY ANYTHING so he’d always be the one breaking up with you every week and then coming back to you on his knees just a day or even a few hours later
He’s just one pathetic lover
🩶
KNOCKOUT
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Oh he’s one hunk of a mech
He’d very visibly expresses his burning feelings for you
He’d flirt with you all the time, give you seductive gazes, smirks, winks etc.
He’s a mech that notices every little detail so he’d shower you with compliments any time he gets a chance, making sure he doesn’t repeat any of them
He’d always ask you to help him fix his paint job whenever it would get ruined or simply give him a buff session
That would be your beginning love language, that’s when you’d be alone and when he’d take his sweet time making you all flustered
He’d love taking you on long relaxing rides, he’s a romantic soul after all
That’s when he’d take advantage of the perfect moment and kiss you, tell you how the long foreplay should finally turn into something serious
He’s an amazing lover, he’d treat you like a princess, pamper you, spoil you, get you everything you need to take care of your beauty
He’s definitely a tease too so you’d enjoy his little suggestive sentences until your passions finally collide and drag you to bed with him
He’s sensual, he likes to take it slow and hot and definitely a mech to get turned on by the pleasure he’s making you feel
Definitely into oral, loves eating you out until you reach your limit
He DOES NOT shut his mouth, he might as well give you an eargasm before and orgasm
He knows what he’s doing, he knows how to find all of your soft spots and overstimulate you and occasionally make you beg, he doesn’t mind, he loves all the sounds you’re making
In conclusion, he’s definitely a mech who read that “She comes first” book
He isn’t perfect though, he can be a burden and difficult to handle, especially his perfectionism which can be REALLY annoying
That’s why you might go through some difficult times with him, take a break and then come back to each other after a month or two
Even when you’d “officially” break up, you would get back together nonetheless
🩶
BREAKDOWN
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MY 2ND FAV!!! 🥰 he so goofy I love him
He definitely lacks a couple of braincells so he isn’t the best at making you intrigued
He would flirt with you all the time in his own… Breakdown way-
He’s trying to cover up the fact he’s VERY afraid of hurting you, mostly physically because he’s so huge
He doesn’t have a sense of his surroundings hence he can be too rough at times and he’s aware of that. Just another reason to be scared to break the ice with you and take it further
He has proved to you a couple of times that he isn’t just a pile of steal and a hammer. Deep inside, behind that thick armor he has a big warm spark waiting for you
His confession would be perfectly timed, even though he hasn’t planned it a bit, just when you’d feel he’s playing with you all along
He would spill his spark for you and tell you he loves you
It would be a start of a wholesome relationship with a perverse size difference which would actually start turning him on
He’s quite of a sloppy kisser (kinda hot ngl)
In bed he’s like a dog in heat, his favorite position is doggy style even, he loves giving you spine breaking back shots and watch your ass jiggle and smack on his thick hips and thighs as you scream for more
He also loves using you as a pocket pussy, just squeeze you in his servo and bounce you up and down on his spike
He doesn’t know what a slow gentle pace is but if you ask him nicely, he will try, for you, his beloved
He’s quite vocal so you two will definitely echo around the warship
He doesn’t give a single damn what others think, hence he’s totally fine with PDA
Quickies are also his thing, he’s a risk taker, it turns him on
Sometimes he’s taking it too far while others are around:
Breakdown: *gets all touchy in the middle of the lab* I want to stick it deep inside of you so bad rn-
Y/N: Not the time-
Breakdown: ok-
He can be so dumb sometimes, no one can make you mad like he can, make you cry even and that’s why the relationship would be unstable at times
But he doesn’t want to lose you because you really make him happy and he wants to build something serious and everlasting for the first time in his life
That’s why you’d always get an honest apology from him and you’d move on together like a healthy couple (until the next stupid thing he does-)
🩶
DREADWING
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MY NUMBER ONE!!! 🥰
He’s definitely a mech to hide his feelings for you and deny it
He’d treat you roughly and avoid you at first, trying to erase every special feeling in his spark he has for you
At some point he wouldn’t be able to do it anymore and he’d let himself sink into your beautiful eyes, admire your smile and small, soft figure, let himself enjoy every moment of your beautiful voice tickling his audio receptors
As you’d grow on him, he wouldn’t leave your side and tend to stare at you without even blinking (he can be a creep-)
His confession would be spontaneous, your lips and his dermas would meet one evening in the lab and he’d tell you how much he’s been thinking of you. It would seem like a proposal because when he gets attached it’s over, you’re his one and only
As your relationship would grow stronger and more serious, you’d see he indeed has a soft side but ONLY for you
Hence he isn’t really into PDA but he isn’t ashamed to say you’re his partner, though he tends to avoid it
He would make sure you don’t think he’s ashamed of being with you, explaining how it’s all because of his duty
When it comes to intimacy, he’s a mech that prefers it slow and gentle at first but then he wouldn’t be able to contain his urge and strength and go rough on you (size kiiiink)
He dirty talks here and there but he’s more of a groaning type that uses his hands to express himself (grab your hair, scratch you, mark you in any way)
He’s into sounding though so he’d make sure you make sweet juicy noise that would only make him into a wider animal that will fill you up to the brim
Perhaps a tiny punishment kink-
Afterwards he’d ask you if he was too rough and if he hurt you to which you’d only boost his ego with saying how it was perfect
He’s not playing around, if you’re his partner, he will cherish you and protect you forever
After losing his brother, he can’t lose you too…
🩶
SOUNDWAVE
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The moment he lay his optics-… visor? Sensors? Anyway- the moment he SAW you, he knew you’re THE ONE.
He must have you at all costs
He would secretly display a smiley face for you from time to time which would lead to him doing it whenever he’d see you on the ship
When you’re alone, he’d quietly approach you and stand or sit very VERY close to you
He would express his intrigue by being willing to help you, displaying sentences such as:
“Soundwave: willing to help.”
As you two would get closer to each other, sentences such as these would show on his visor:
“Soundwave: finding Y/N prepossessing.”
“Soundwave: relishes moments with Y/N.”
He would start displaying a heart the moment he’d feel as if you two finally clicked
When he’d want you to give him a kiss, he’d simply lean closer to you and wait for a sweet smooch on his display
This is ONLY when you two are alone, PDA is a big nono due to his job, he must stay focused at all times
In bed all he cares about is pleasing you. Tell him what you like and how you like it and he will more than just exceed your expectations
If you’re a fan of tentacles, well… you know~
Sometimes it seems as if he doesn’t even need to get intimate, as if he’s just your pleasure robot but at times he can get overstimulated by the sight of your pleasure so he gets the urge to take over
He doesn’t make sounds at all
He definitely videotapes every single freaky time you two have (kinkyyyy)
If you ask him about his voice, he will reveal it only for you but afterwards he will still prefer not using it often
If you’re his, you’re his forever, no doubt
🩶
SHOCKWAVE
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HE SO THICC
It is ILLOGICAL for him to fall in love
But here we are, lab boy is all over you
He would rather die than express it, hence you always thought you had no chance with him
Though as time would pass, he would invite you to the lab more and more often so you would help him
He would admire your tiny hands at work, just stand there and watch you do whatever he asked you to
He needs a little lab assistant to help with him with stuff of smaller size
And that’s indeed how you became his little lab assistant!
You would get mixed signals from him whenever he’d pet your head and tell you you did a good job
Until one day he would just lean closer to you and say:
Shockwave: I request a kiss.
To which you’d kiss his LAMP.
He’d only treat you as a partner when you’re alone, mostly in the lab or his berthroom, explaining to you his position is too serious to show any kind of weakness
He would keep his formality of speech all the time which is kinda hot at times
Getting intimate with him is not easy considering his sex drive isn’t big but once you do, it’s heaven
He always takes it his way and it’s mostly in the lab. He has a weird sex in the lab kink (kinda hot)
He prefers missionary as he loves seeing a pure mess he’s pounding into
He’s mostly quiet but he would throw his helm back or/and groan in pleasure because you’re too tight for his girthy spike
Getting caught is not something that worries him. Even if someone does walk in on you, he would just assert dominance that way - stare at whoever entered the lab as he keeps pounding you
He isn’t the best at aftercare but he’d praise you and clean you, carry you to bed or just let you rest on his shoulder as he continues working
He’s VERY possessive which means there’s no running away from Shocky~
You’re lamp boy’s eternal love
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Some stuff is from the roleplays with my bestie @k----a27s
Dividers belong to @kiwicidios , @firefly-graphics and @kimjiho1 💜
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