#seriously. you cannot imagine how big the temptation has been

[yet-another-heathen]

The First Ember - IX

1,921 words. Original work: The Jackal of An Nadr

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Content Warning | unintentional drug overdose by captors (bad side effects but not life threatening), fever whump, the very first signs of pneumonia, undressing while unconscious (medical reasons), heavy bruising, evidence of past noncon, wound/scar reveal, mention of unsanitary bodily fluids, [Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings]

Tag List | @killtheprotagonist @secretwhumplair @ink-and-salt @kixngiggles @brutal-nemesis @thebewilderer @whumpsical @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi @whimperwoods @shydragonrider @pizzasthengym @thecyrulik @ceph-the-ghost-writer @mylifeisonthebookshelf @ohwhumpydays @redwingedwhump @whump-queen @scoundrelwithboba @suspicious-whumping-egg

The human looked like it might not survive the night.

Yeezumon had been cradling it for the last fifteen minutes while Odrai climbed down the side of the ship to gather sand from the dunes. It was already several hours into the night, but below the topmost inch of sand, the dunes were nearly as warm as they had been during the day. He returned to the deck and passed the bags down to Ifyaa. As he did, he cast a somewhat worried glance at the human. "How bad is it?"

"...I don't know yet," Ifyaa admitted, creating a nest on their cot with the bags. "It's running a bad fever, and...." He paused, sharing a worried look with Yeezumon. "And I think we may have overdosed it on the eadh."

The little thing was showing every sign of it there was. Breaths clouded with heavy mist, despite the warmth of the cabin. Excessive tears. Cold sweat. Everything across its body that could produce water was doing so in abundance. On its own it wouldn't have even been that concerning; eadh overdoses weren't fatal. But with the fever already ravaging its system? That changed everything.

Odrai seemed to realize as much. But all he could offer was, "If anyone can save it, it's you."

Ifyaa said quietly, "Thank you, Odrai."

"We'll call on you if we need anything, but you should go," Yeezumon said gently. The human was starting into another fit of incoherent crying. "It isn't safe."

Odrai just nodded, giving the human one last, lingering look. Then he was gone, the trap door shut behind him.

The Husbands shared another look, then turned their attention back to the human. It was clinging onto Yeezumon like a lifeline, face pressed flush against the heat of his chest. Every inch of it was violently shivering against the cold. Its clothes were nearly soaked through with sweat, even to the outermost layer of its robes. Long hair had come loose from its braids and gotten tangled from tossing and turning beneath the sheets. Tear tracks, snot, and saliva smeared parts of its face. It was entirely a mess.

It was crying. Sometimes letting out incoherent jumbles of words as it dreamed, but mostly just crying. Every whine sent waves of glowing, orange pain through their chests like embers being caught by a breeze. It felt like a barb tugging on the wrong side of Ifyaa's sternum, as sharp as it was disturbing. 

He sat down on the edge of the cot, wringing out the cloth in warm water. Its eyes barely opened at all, and when they did there was no coherent thought at all behind them. Drifting, unseeing. Wherever it was in its dreams, it was lost there. And still, when Ifyaa brought the cloth to gently dab at its face, it immediately twisted away. Gasping. Taking in deep, clouded breaths like it was struggling to breathe.

There was every chance it was. The only time that an eadh overdose could be dangerous was if the lungs began to fill with fluid. That usually took weeks of constant overuse before it became a problem. But Ifyaa could hear the crackling of its lungs when it breathed too deep. Just because something was safe for the ifrit didn't necessarily mean it was for a human.

It took a while for the wave of crying to pass, the human already so burnt out that it simply couldn't continue. Yeezumon continued murmuring reassurances against its temple, running hands over it to try to give it more warmth.

Both of them were worried. But the look on Yeezumon's face was heartbreaking. 

"Habibi, if I've killed it—"

"No. No, love." Ifyaa laid a hand on his cheek. "It won't be because of the eadh. If it doesn't make it, it will be because of the fever. You haven't done anything that can't be fixed with time."

"It might not have time."

All he could do was manage a small smile. "Have you met this thing? Don't give up on it just yet."

That managed to get a huff of air. It wasn't much, but it was a start.

"Here. Help me get it out of its robes."

They moved it to the bed, Yeezumon settling in behind its back. His fingers started on the lacing of its robe. The little thing barely even stirred, boneless aside from the rhythmic strain of its breaths. 

They worked its clothes off in effortless tandem. First the burnt sepia-orange of its outer robes. Then the long pants it wore beneath, and finally the soaked-through fabric of its kurta. 

Both of them stopped entirely when they saw what was underneath. 

Bruises, mottled all across bronze skin. Across its stomach. Its knees. Rope burns spun around its wrists and ankles. A massive, red-purple blotch colored its hip most of the way down one thigh. But they were nothing compared to the dozens of bruises along the inside of its thighs and encircling its upper arms. Many the still-recognizable shape of hands.

Its chest had been wrapped with a long length of bandaging, nearly covering its entire ribcage. Just beneath its collarbone on the side of its heart, an angry red brand lay scabbed and broken. The symbol was nearly the size of the boy's own palm. It looked like calligraphy, the kind that the Qa'imrani merchants along the east edge of the desert used for trade. 

Ifyaa recognized the script before Yeezumon did. 

"The boy has been branded a thief."

It took several long moments for the implications to sink in for both of them. The horror of it wasn't even that it was a criminal. They were on a pirate ship, after all. It was so much worse than that.

"So that's why we found it all alone out there." Yeezumon wiped a hand down his face. "Its own people left it out there to die."

Over something that as an ifrit would, at worst, have lost a hand over. The two of them already knew what little regard humans had for each other's lives, but staring down the evidence of it was sickening.

"The mark can't be more than a week or two old."

"No wonder it reacted to the iron as badly as it did. And all this...." He was still staring at the bruises that disappeared all the way up under its innerwear. "It didn't even show other signs that it was hurt."

Ifyaa probed gently over the bandage on its chest. "Help me lift it up a little. I need to see how bad the wounds are." 

They readjusted, and Ifyaa began unwinding the linen starting at the bottom of its ribs. He was careful not to press too firmly, no idea what he was going to find. 

But with every unwound coil, he found only more unbroken skin beneath. A few mottled bruises, but no cuts. And his gentle probing only produced the faint winces that he'd expect of tender bruising. Nothing that indicated broken ribs. 

Ifyaa's eyebrows furrowed. And then with one more undone loop, his face lit up with surprise. "Oh."

The jackal wasn't hurt. 

It wasn't a bandage. 

Beneath the soft, brown waves of chest hair he'd been expecting, there were breasts. It was clear they'd been intentionally softened and made flatter over time, either by the repeated compression, or by hand. The boy wasn't hurt. He'd been binding. And by the looks of it, he'd been doing so for a very long time.

The Husbands made a flash of eye contact over the top of him. Then after a pause, Ifyaa's hands moved to carefully check over the rest of its ribs. It had a rather spectacular bruise on its shoulder to match the one on its hip, but aside from that he found nothing.

"Well....that's far better than I'd expected to find. At least nothing is broken. Here, lend me your hands."

Yeezumon helped him to work off its innerwear. He'd been planning to do so anyway, it needed as much skin-to-skin contact as possible for warmth. But it was the final confirmation of what they both suspected. While he certainly was a man now, he hadn't been born that way. He was one of the Inan.

And there was even more evidence of what had been done to him all the way up his thighs. Layers of bruises, in addition to scratch marks on his hips. This couldn't all be the work of one man. It was brutal. 

"Gods..." Yeezumon whispered. "No wonder it's so terrified. If its own people did this, imagine what it must think is coming for it now."

Its shivering had badly worsened with its skin exposed to the air, and its unconscious sounds of distress were as sad as they were painful. Yeezumon spent a moment working down his own pants, then lay down and drew it closer against his chest. 

He was careful to keep it away from his own bandaged shoulder, but was able to position a sandbag between its thighs where the arteries ran beneath. Then he wrapped it up in all his remaining arms, a loose embrace that it sank into immediately. A few more tears raced down its cheek. But its breaths were already coming easier now that the pressure of the binding was gone. And soon what sounds it was making were ones of exhausted, boneless relief.

Ifyaa spent a while longer cleaning the worst of the sweat from its skin, then undressed and joined them. Half his arms braided themselves between his Husband's, while the other set about gently teasing the tangles back out of the boy's hair. 

"It's going to be so angry with us in the morning," he said.

Yeezumon chuckled. "Without even the faintest doubt." A moment of quiet. "I'm almost afraid to give it more eadh at all, come tomorrow. Is there anything in the infirmary we can use as an alternative?"

"Nothing with so few side effects. We'll just have to start in much smaller doses, and see how it tolerates it." 

"Mm."

He fit his hand into one of Yeezumon's, and gave a small squeeze. They'd been married for three centuries. He knew the sound of his husband's guilt. "He's going to be alright, Habibi. Don't spare your regret on something that hasn't happened yet."

Yeezumon sighed, but gave a small nod.

Softly, "I'll take first watch. Get some sleep."

Another nod. Then as was their way, "I love you always."

"I love you longer still."

They lapsed into silence. Ifyaa spent the time carding gently through the human's hair. He enjoyed the feeling of loose waves that were so different from the curls he was familiar with. And though his mind drifted, he continued to listen as the human's heart evened out and slowed. It was falling into deeper sleep at last. 

....but after a while, something caught at the edge of his senses. The rich smell of incense, edged with a coppery tang that made his head start to spin. Pheromones as familiar to him as the number of his hands. His mouth twitched up. 

He knew exactly what his husband was thinking about—because he'd been thinking it, too. "Don't get too tempted," he said, not bothering to hide the amusement in his voice. "I know full well how you get when you're around them."

Yeezumon didn't open his eyes, but his mouth twitched. "You're just as guilty as me."

A chuckle. Yes, that he was. “We're still selling him.”

“Wouldn't even dream otherwise.”

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#I cannot BELIEVE it's finally here!!! #a never-before-seen chapter and long awaited update #THIS IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT CHAPTER #both plot-wise AND character-wise!!!! #I can't believe its finally here. I've been adamantly holding in these spoilers for AGES #I'm so excited I'm vibrating #seriously. you cannot imagine how big the temptation has been #thank you to each and every one of you who not only read but *reread* the series as it was repenned #I love every one of you more than words can say #The Jackal of An-Nadr #whump #whumpblr #whump series #defiant whumpee #sick fic #fever whump #illness whump #writeblr #historical whump #historical fiction #fantasy whump #slow-burn monsterfucker series #monsterfucking #monsterfucker

[rillian4e]

Scaramouche who secretly steals your panties, using them to masturbate while thinking about fucking into you roughly, how he would ruin you over and over... His mind filled with thoughts of you, bare and all tied up as he used you solely for his own pleasure, he loved imagining you be all helpless under him as he took what's his.

Scaramouche who insists on keeping you warm when you're cold, his cock buried deep inside your needy, wet cunt as you try to fall asleep but how can you when you can feel his cock filling you up so nicely? Even as you tried falling asleep, he wouldn't let you, "Shh, I'm going to take care of you, okay?" He'd whisper into your ear while his hand rubbed your clit making you ache even more for him to just fuck you until you're asleep. "Feel warm, hm? Your greedy cunt is practically sucking me in, you really are a slut, utterly pathetic." His degrading words made you embarrassed but it only made you clench around him more, the degradation making you more aroused than ever. "Look at you, you're soaked, aren't you the least bit embarrassed?" He smirked before placing his lips on your neck, bitting into the sensitive skin.

Scaramouche who cannot resist the temptation to take you when you wear short, tight skirts... Seriously, what were you thinking? That could only end up with him fucking ruthlessly into you, behind a big Tree in Sumeru, you hoped no one will come by, holding a hand to cover your moans, only to be pushed away by Scaramouche, he then pinned both of your arms above your head, "What, scared about someone hearing how much of a slut you are for me? Let them hear, let them know who you belong to. Don't you dare try muffling your moans again." He remarked, rutting himself against you desperately.

Scaramouche who is obsessed with the way you look as you suck him off, tears in the corner of your eyes as you do your best to take him into your mouth. When he saw you struggling to take him in, he purposely grabbed a piece of your hair while he trusted himself down your throat, laughing as he sees you gag on him, that only made him enjoy it more, "Crying already? Pathetic. Be a good whore and take it all." Not showing any mercy as he continued fucking himself into your mouth.

Scaramouche who denies that he loves you, he doesn't wish to be vulnerable infront of you, having been abandoned by so many, he is scared of even you betraying and leaving him all alone. That's why he has to mark you as his every night, breed you until you can't walk, so that way you're gonna be his forever. "Tell me, who do you belong to?" His eyes gazing down at yours menacingly, you could see that he wanted reassurance and was insecure, even if he did try to act strong and tough, "Y-You, You, Scara! Only you!" You cried out, feeling your orgasm near, you could hear him chuckle as his movements softened for just a short moment, "Yes, that's right. Me, only me. You're mine, all mine." With those words you both came together, panting as you two laid exhausted in bed.

#scaramouche smut #genshin wanderer #wanderer smut #genshin x reader #genshin scara #wanderer #scara x reader #genshin smut

[bitchwhoreofastorm]

this is not very good. you have been warned.

-

When Lorkhan dreamed of inhabiting his world, he must have dreamed of inhabiting it as Wulf. This is what Aspera thinks, watching Wulf stride through the forest as comfortably as if it were his, as if it had been crafted for him alone.

Wulf is handsome, and not only for the Lorkhan written upon him. His youth in the wilds has left him strong and muscular, his healthy diet and new civilized life on Hrothgar have made him tidy and clean. Someone has cut the mats from his hair, though he still wears it loose and long in a shiny oak veil around his thick shoulders; someone has taken a knife and shaved away the unsightly fuzz from his square jaw, and someone has clad his massive frame in long wool trousers and a fine leather belt, as if he were being made fit for Auri-el's court. But he goes shirtless beneath his trollskin cape, although the forest he moves through is glittering palely with frost, and there's still an untamed savageness in his careful silent steps, and a hint of danger in the golden sword that hangs at the end of one of his long arms, and a profound sadness in his storm-grey eyes.

He could be Lorkhan incarnate, surveying his own deeds for a span, and Aspera is as always captivated by him. Forced to assume a mortal form for this profoundly mortal act of indulgence, she sits still as she can on a bough of one of Skyrim's tall silent evergreens, and rests her chin on her knees, and watches Wulf move silent through the forest. She's as motionless as the chilly air (Kyne dares not intrude here), if her eyes could devour she's been fasting for this moment. All this time they spent together, in the Dawn era in different forms, and then in the woods not so long ago, and not once has Aspera come close to being sated for sight of him. Even now she aches with hunger. How, she wonders, can even the mere shadow of him be so beautiful?

But he's come closer, now, his head bowed and veiled by his shiny wood-coloured hair, his thick limbs hidden beneath the cape. Aspera wonders if he's aware that his walk betrays him-- he moves like something not of this world, each stride a little too long, each step a little too light for his size. He moves like his next step will be into Aetherius, into the veil of death, forever out of reach, a terrifying sort of grace. He moves past the tree Aspera perches in, and she leans forwards, eyes wide and hungry, devouring the sight of him.

Her own movement is not so delicate; with the shift the tree she perches in groans.

Wulf stops in his tracks and looks around him.

He does not think to look up (he must be getting sloppy, she taught him to always look up), but he's definitely caught the noise, and he looks this way and that, stray snowflakes snagging in his loose hair. His eyes, deep and colourless as any glacier, widen as he tries to peer through the tall narrow trees which surround him. The frost crinkles underfoot as he turns a slow circle, and Aspera dares not breathe.

"Hans?" Wulf calls out. His voice is soft, but his words rumble even through the trees.

No answer comes, so he looks in another direction. 

"Harald?”

The forest remains silent. Frowning, Wulf begins to walk again, and within moments, once again, so painfully, he's gone.

Aspera is left to slump back against the trunk of the tree, clenching her eyes shut, attempting to imprison the sight she'd so eagerly drank in. 

The loss of him from her view is unbearable; it’s as if she’s reliving the tower all over again, and each time she feels as if the grief might shatter her. She considered taking him captive, once. In her darkest moments she’s imagined keeping this piece of Lorkhan for herself, nestled close and safe deep in the heart of her realm, but she already can't stand the sadness in him and she loathes the thought of hurting him further, so she's banished the idea to the only part of her which feels guilt, and resigned herself to possessing him only in the form of these glimpses. Cold comfort, trapping his form like fire beneath her eyelid, stealing looks at him from behind Hrothgar’s walls. However, it’s all that’s within her reach, and even something so small as his silhouette in her memory is to be cherished, guarded--

A mighty heave shakes the tree and Aspera is toppling to the ground before she can even draw her daggers.

Then she stops falling, and she is in someone's arms.

Wulf never laughs-- a strange trait, because Lorkhan was always laughing-- but he has his own equivalent, for when he successfully pulls a prank, and that is a big toothy smile that burns like the sun. Said smile is burning into Aspera’s shoulders now, for Wulf has caught her on the descent and is now crushing her into an embrace, swinging her around mightily and beaming hot and triumphant against her when he presses his face into her torso.

Aspera, of course, cannot tolerate this. Aspera, of course, shouts in alarm and knees him in the stomach. This shocks him and he staggers back, and Aspera’s on him in an instant, pushing him down to the ground and wresting him into a grapple. But he's larger than he was before, heavier, and he manages to overturn them, pinning her down with his whole body, resting his forehead against her own.

"As-peh-rah," Wulf breathes through his smile.

"Wulf," Aspera replies, and flips him hard into the ground.

The blow knocks the wind from his lungs, and he lets out a hearty 'oof', but he's smiling still, his shoulders shaking with the mute mirth that's as close as he'll ever come to laughter. His eyes are crinkled happily, his hair is tangled with clumps of ice and leaf-litter, and when Aspera gets on top of him again, pinning his shoulders with her knees and wrapping a hand around his neck, he only smiles wider.

"Wulf," Aspera says again, amazed. "Did you trick me?"

"I'm Ysmir now," Wulf replies. His voice knocks snowflakes back into the air and sends Aspera’s hair fluttering.

"Ysmir? Who calls you Ysmir?"

"Paarthurnax."

As easily as if he were brushing off leaves, Wulf-- Ysmir-- rises to sitting, shoving Aspera off of him. She falls back on her rump without a struggle, only staring as Wulf shakes debris from his hair. He does not look so civilized, now, smeared with dirt and snow; she sees that he's been painted in the Atmoran fashion, with an image of a dark red gash cleaving his bare breast from collar to left nipple.

"Paarthurnax," Aspera sneers, through her nose, so that her voice takes on a mocking lilt. "Ambitious lord of cruelty. Is that who you're serving, now, little Wulf?"

Wulf frowns at her, in the way that he always used to frown at her-- taking everything too seriously, especially the jokes. “I serve nobody,” he tells her, deathly-grave. “None but myself.” 

“So what is this?” Aspera reaches out and grabs his hair, thumbing the neatly-trimmed edges.

“My hair.”

“You cut it.” 

“Hans cut it.” Flushing red (he’d always been a sensitive soul), Wulf shoves Aspera’s hand away, and even the graze of his palm feels supernaturally hot. But then the sight of her seems to rekindle something in him, a light behind his cloud-grey eyes that comes perilously close to feeling familiar, and his mouth once again splits open in a smile, revealing perfect yellow teeth. 

“Why are you smiling?” Aspera asks him. 

In reply, Wulf reaches out and clasps her face between his big palms. “Aspera,” he repeats himself, in awe. “It’s truly you.”

“Yes, it’s me. Let go of me.” 

“You’ve come back.” His palms are scratchy with callouses, smelling richly of earth. 

Affectionately, Aspera elbows his arm away, then rises to her feet. “Don’t flatter yourself, mortal. I’m not here for you.” 

Wulf ignores the lie, ignores the good-natured act of violence. He gropes around him, lifts the sword which had fallen to the side when he’d caught her, rises to his feet and stretches. He’s grown since Aspera last saw him, she can’t help but notice, not just in his considerable height; his body has filled out, his already-generous muscles now padded with a healthy layer of Nordic fat. “But you’re back,” he repeats himself, as if it were the simplest thing in the world. 

Aspera can only nod. She feels mute, breathless, winded not only by the fall; she’s being forced to consider once again that if Lorkhan ever dreamed of roaming his own world, this must be the form he would choose. The alluring seriousness of his dark eyes, the handsome downwards curl of his mouth and the sheer power betrayed by his mortal form (she recalls uneasily the strength with which he’d caught her, the magnetic heat behind his skin); as with Lorkhan, being near him feels like standing on a precipice, the temptation to fling herself in overwhelming.

He takes her contemplative silence as an invitation and seizes her hand in his own. “Come,” he bids her, “Let’s go meet Hans. And Harald.”

“Who?”

“My friends. We travel, we hunt, we’ll roam the world, like you and I did.”

“I don’t want to meet your friends.” 

“Oh.” Wulf blinks. “We won’t, then. I know where they are. We’ll go away from them.” 

“And go where? Towards the halls of Kyne’s crony?”

“Paarthurnax?” 

“Him.” 

“No, to a cabin. I left Paarthurnax long ago.” 

“Did you.”

“I told you, I travel now. With Hans and Harald.” (There’s that frown again, full of concern). “You’re mad?” 

It takes all of Aspera’s strength to wrench her hand away from him. Shaking her head mutely, she turns away. 

Time, Auri-el’s invention, does not mean much to either of them, but if one was reckoning by time they had once shared a lot of it. When Wulf was still the foundling of dragons, living alone and without language in the wilds of Tamriel, Aspera had stolen to Nirn and made herself his companion. She’d saved his life, and it had been a perfectly selfish endeavor; they had fought together, hunted together, wrestled, riddled each other, spent long nights by paltry fires cooking scrappy meals of rabbits. They had fled Hircine’s wild hunt on foot and hacked their way out of a herd of werewolves, they had crept around Namira’s corruption and looked Herma-Mora in the eye without flinching. They had shared precious moments together, moments where Aspera had forgot to feel as if something had been torn from her. And when Wulf had allowed himself to be convinced to join the storm-bitten wicked society of the Northmen, abandoning their adventures for a mountain and the mandates of Kyne, those moments had begun to seem paltry indeed.

“Aspera?”

“How arrogant you are, mortal. Asking me to return to your side, after you left me.”

“You left me. You could have stayed.”

“You didn’t give me a choice,” replies Aspera. “Was I meant to follow you, make a toady of myself for Kyne?” 

“But I left him, I told you. I’m with Hans and Harald now.” The soft crackle of frost as Wulf shifts on his feet. “So you can come with me.”

Aspera exhales. “No.” 

“No?” 

No. I’m going to the south, and we shall never meet again.”

“Don’t go. Join Hans and Harald and I. We can hunt--” 

“Typical of you. You only want me for your collection.” 

“I want you to stay with me.” 

“Haven’t I denied you enough times before, Shor? When will you learn your lesson?” 

Wulf is silent for several seconds at that, so quiet that Aspera thinks he’s left. But when she turns she finds that he’s come closer to her, and he’s still staring at her with his sad, serious expression, his eyes as dull grey as ash. 

And he comes even closer to her, painfully close, and she cannot bring herself to move away when he touches her cheek once more.

“Koraav zey, Boethiah,” Wulf says softly.

Aspera turns her head away. “I won’t.” 

“I am not him.”  

“I don’t believe you. How can you deny what you are, after all I’ve known about you?” 

“I’m not him,” Wulf repeats. One of his hands, hot despite the chill of the day, cradles her cheek, and with the other he brushes his thumb over her lips. He’s standing very close, staring seriously into her eyes with a gaze like staring into one of Kyne’s tempests, fathomless, a spark of violence beneath the eyelid. “Look at me.” 

Aspera closes her eyes and laughs a bitter laugh. “I don’t believe you.” 

“Boet-hi-ah.” 

“Do you think you know me, then, using that name? You know I won’t listen to your words, that I never have; so if you mean to say this thing to me, prove it.” 

And Aspera must have known what challenge he was planning, the single thing Lorkhan would never have given to her, for she is not surprised when Ysmir bites a kiss into her lips. 

The kiss is sweet, and tastes of ash, and burns for the beauty of it, and Aspera tries her best to bring Lorkhan’s face to mind, as if it were Lorkhan’s mouth on her own, as if Lorkhan were living and Lorkhan would have ever held her so closely, partaking of her hunger with a warm tongue and sharp teeth. It’s not exactly gentle, but she must jealously wonder where he’s gotten all the practice (who are Hans and Harald?), in the few moments before he drags her into an embrace and crushes any power of thought out of her. Later there will be time to ponder this all, to contemplate the real want behind the deed and whether Lorkhan’s memory is behind the depth of the kiss and the grasping of fingers, but for a sliver of that so-called time, somewhere between tasting ash and separating just enough to concoct a plan in breathy whispers, Aspera forgets to pretend that it’s Lorkhan she’s embracing. 

-

In a rough-shod hunting cabin, on a frigid winter night, Ysmir kneels by a straw bed and holds a sword aloft like an offering.

“What is this?” laughs Aspera. She’s perched above him on the thin straw mattress, draped in blankets like a queen. 

“It’s a sword,” says Ysmir, earnestly. 

“You’re holding it wrong, Wulf. How much have you forgotten?”

“It’s a gift.”

“Always giving me gifts. Come, get off the floor and join me again.” 

But Ysmir stays kneeling, and he might have looked a little ridiculous, naked on his knees with the blade held high over his head, if it weren’t for the deathly somberness of his eyes. “Take it,” he commands her, with no hint of humour, “It’s for you.” 

“Well, aren’t you cocky.” But Aspera knows him, and knows his stubbornness, so, without further argument, she takes the sword from his hand and lifts it in her own. It’s unlike any sword she’s seen before: the blade is golden, very thin and very long, with a slight curve to it; the balance is impeccable. When she moves her arm to cut the air with it, it flickers hotly like a candle’s flame.

She’s so captivated by the blade that she feels rather than sees Ysmir sit on the bed behind her, keeping his distance respectfully, save for the large hand that lightly cups the outer rim of her hip. 

“It’s a good blade,” Aspera declares, resisting the urge to sink back into him. The fire’s burned out ages ago and the cabin is cold, but Ysmir’s hand feels hot as any brand. “Why give it to me?”

“To know you by, when we meet again.” 

Aspera places the sword down on her bare thighs with one hand, and uses the other to clasp the hand on her hip. “Who says we will meet again?” she asks lazily, leaning back against his warm chest, so that her head comes to rest with the ear pressed just over the place where a mortal man’s heart would be. “No matter. Does it have a name?”

Ysmir bows his head, embraces her from behind, pulls her in close against that uncanny-quiet chest. And he whispers in her ear, in a voice that rumbles through the world itself: “Goldbrand.”

#self iso has ruined me #my laptop crashed like three times while trying to post this i think god himself was trying to discourage this one #fic

[bangtan-sonyeonddaeng]

~Jungkook soulmate AU~

It’s that same dream again. You’re standing on stage in front of tens of thousands of people. They are all shouting your name, but you can’t hear whose name they are saying. You look to your left and can make out 6 other guys. One with light brown hair and dimples when he smiles. One with black hair who nearly falls off stage when he laughs. Another one with bright purple hair who’s laugh makes you feel warm inside. There’s a guy slightly taller than you next to you. His voice is quite deep but his eyes sparkle when he looks at the crowd. You look intently into his eyes, trying to see if you can see your reflection in them but it’s of no use. Your image is blurred out in them too. A smaller man with silver hair is talking now. His eyes remind you of a cat’s, but there is a softness in them when he is looking at the fans. And there’s the final member standing at the end, who’s smile looks like it could rival the sun’s. You have no idea who they are, every time a name is said the sound is muffled. You feel that fate is toying with you. Letting you see through the eyes of your soulmate, but not letting you hear the exact things that would make you able to find out who they are. 

And just like every other dream you’ve had previously, right before your soulmate is about to introduce himself, you wake up, startled and covered in a cold sweat. You glance down and inspect your body, making sure it is yours you are back in. You sigh heavily and lay back down against the pillows glancing up at the ceiling. So far you knew very few things about your soulmate. 

1. He was obviously in amazing shape. In one of your dreams one of the other guys had lifted your shirt up and the crowd went wild. You glanced down in curiosity and were pleasantly surprised by the amount of muscle that was on your body. 

2. He was obviously a singer or performer of some sort. And was in a group with 6 other guys. 

3. He was Korean. You couldn’t understand anything that they were saying but you had googled a few words you thought you had heard and discovered that they were in Korean. 

4. He was loved and adored by many. The group must be popular if they are performing on front of this many people. 

5. Finding him was probably going to be like finding a needle in a haystack. 

Googling the hair colors of the other members had yielded many search results. Apparently lots of idols had dyed their hair purple. And a few others had dimples as well. You weren’t able to fully see the other members. Most of their faces were blurred out except for the few features the dreams allowed you to see. These must be the ones that stood out to your soulmate the most, or that he particularly cherished about them. You were at least fairly confident that your soulmate was in a kpop group. A very popular one at that. But you could never tell what country they were touring in so you had no way of even narrowing it down by which city they were in. 

Your phone alarm suddenly went off, signaling that it was time for you to get up and go to your office and meet with your publisher about the release date for your latest story. It was a tale of two soulmates, their only connection being through their dreams. And you gave the main characters a happy ending in hopes that it would allow fate to give you both the same kindness. 

Jungkook woke up startled. He shot out of bed with his eyes wide and heart racing. He got out of bed in an attempt to ground himself. His feet touched the plush carpet of the hotel room. The feeling helped center him in reality. He walked towards the mirror and turned on the light, seeing his own reflection staring back at him was a comfort. He turned the handle on the faucet and let the water run until it was ice cold before splashing it on his face. When he glanced back up, his hyung was staring at him in the mirror. 

“Did you have that dream again?” 

“Yeah. Same one. Actually, well this time it was different. I don’t know it’s hard to explain. I finally got to meet her. Instead of the usual where it’s me trying to figure out clues on how to find her.  But her face was blurred. I couldn’t make out any defining features. But goodness when I was finally able to hug her it was like every worry or concern I had just melted away. I really want to find her but I don’t know how and it’s so frustrating! I’m living out the main character’s lives in her novels and this one is literally our story. She gave them a happy ending, so I can only hope the same happens for us.” Jungkook’s voice cracks at the end and he’s immediately enveloped in a hug. “It’s so frustrating, Jimin. I have all these clues but no idea where to even go with this.” 

“It’s okay, Jungkookie. I know you two will find each other some day. Soulmates always do. Let’s go over again when you know so far?”

“She writes novels. She lives in a big city somewhere. She speaks English. Normally the books she writes are fantasy ones but this one was realistic. I think it’s her way of helping me find her maybe? Like maybe if I look up the plot line of this next novel I can find her.” 

“So start there then!”

“I know a lot of English now since I have been studying but I don’t know how to look up this plot line.” 

“Maybe just look up new books about soulmates and dreams? See whichever article looks to be the most recent?”

“I’m sure many people have written about this before, hyung.” 

“True. But your situation is unique. You’re famous. Surely she knows this from the dreams she’s probably had about being on stage from your point of view. You just need to find one with the plot centered around that.” 

“That’s... actually a very good idea. Thank you, Jiminie.”

“Jiminie hyung to you. And you’re welcome! Now come on it’s still early. Go back to sleep for a little bit we have to prepare for the first date of our world tour tomorrow! We’re gonna have to be up in a couple hours.” Jungkook groans at this. 

“How am I supposed to sleep when the possibility of me meeting my soulmate is so close?!”

“Just figure out a way. You can look for her tomorrow. Right now you need sleep. We don’t want you passing out on stage, so come on now!” Jimin shoves him out the door and Jungkook reluctantly crawls back into bed. Jimin walks to the door that connects their two rooms. “I’ll try to look for you tomorrow too when I have time, okay? That can be our focus after rehearsal is done.” 

“Okay. Thank you, hyung.” 

“Of course.”

Jimin shuts the door and all is quiet. Jungkook tries to sleep. Really he does. But really, he’s potentially one Internet search away from finding you. 

Resist the temptation, Kook. You can do it. Be strong!

He rolls over onto his side and gazes out the window... Then promptly turns back around and grabs his phone off the hotel nightstand and does a quick search for the plot line of your book. An article comes up so he clicks on it. He sees that your book is being released in just a few short days! And as fate would have it, one of the signings just so happens to be in the same city as one of his concerts. It has to be you. There is no doubt in his mind. You have the same hair and build as the girl in his dream. He clicks play on a video where you are being interviewed about your own book. 

“It’s actually my own story. Well, although mine isn’t finished yet. I see things that my soulmate does through my dreams. He is actually someone famous in a boy group. I know he’s Korean. But that’s about it. I’m hoping through this book he’ll be able to find me, since it’s our story...” You go on to talk more but Jungkook cannot hear it over the pounding heart beat in his own ears. It’s you! It’s really you! He shouts happily and begins flailing about in the bed when suddenly the door is swung open, and a very grumpy looking Jimin is standing in the doorway.

“Jungkook, what on earth-”

“I found her, hyung! Her name is y/n! Look!” He practically shoves the phone in his face and Jimin has to back away to let his eyes focus before they widen in shock. 

“Oh my god! You really did! This is amazing! And look one of her book signings is the same day as our tour date! Kook! You’re going to meet your soulmate in just a few days!” Jimin tackles him onto the bed and rolls over next to him, looking fondly at the maknae as he’s endlessly scrolling through your social media, watching your interviews, and reading up on what he can about you. 

“She’s beautiful, Jimin. And everything I could have imagined and more. Oh my goodness look at how many books she’s written she must be so smart and creative. And listen to her laugh!” He goes on like that absolutely gushing over you. “I’m going to message her.” 

“No! Jungkook, don’t.”

“Why not? I’m positive it is her.” 

“Don’t you think it’ll be more meaningful to have your first interaction be in person? You can just show up at her book sign and boom! There you go. Couple of the year. Couple of the century. I wonder what’s your couple name going to be.” 

“Jimin you sound just as excited about this as me.”

“Because I am! Our little Jungkookie is finally going to meet his soulmate. But seriously now it’s time for bed. You gotta be up in 2 hours now so at least try to get some sleep.”

“Okay. Goodnight.”

“Night, Kook. Sweet dreams.” 

“Oh I have a feeling from now on they will be.” 

**The day of the concert and book signing** 

You’re on the way to your fan meeting when suddenly a billboard and flash of purple hair catches your eye. 

BTS to perform at the stadium tonight at 7pm! 

“Stadium? Wait a minute.. The purple hair.. the silver... His eyes. Oh my god!” You run up to the billboard to get a closer look but by the time you get closet it’s changed to a different advertisement. You sigh heavily, pulling out your phone ready to snap a photo the next time it scrolls by. When it does you take a photo and closely inspect it. 

“Oh my god I am an idiot. How did I not notice this sooner! My soulmate is in BTS. Holy shit.” You gaze at all of their faces until you see one you’ve never seen any defining features of in your dreams. “That must be him. Jungkook? Oh he’s so cute oh my god.” You pull out your phone and lose yourself in the searches, watching interviews, looking at pictures, watching a music video. “They are so insanely talented it’s not fair and oh! Look at these photos of him when they debuted! What a little cutie I wanna squish his cheeks.” Your fawning is interrupted when a call comes in from your publisher. You glance at the time and realize you are late to your own book signing. 

“Shit. I’m so sorry! I got side tracked but I am on my way!” 

“You better hurry up y/n! There’s a ton of people here right now! What on earth were you doing?” 

“I found my soulmate! Jungkook!”

“I’m sorry what? Did you say Jungkook, like BTS Jungkook?”

“Yes! Do you know them?”

“I’ve been a fan of theirs for years. I’m actually going to their show tonight. My friend bailed on me last minute so I have an extra ticket if you want to go with-”

“Yes! 100 times yes, please take me with you!”

 “Ok ok! You can come with me just.. how are you planning on finding him?”

“....”

“Y/n? You still there?”

“Sorry. Just thinking. I didn’t plan that far ahead. They’re basically untouchable how on earth am I going to ever meet him?”

“Oh come on y/n. I’m sure fate wouldn’t be that cruel to you! Have a little faith.”

“I’m not going to get my hopes up. I think for now I will just be content with admiring him from afar. Anyway I gotta go. I’m approaching the building now. Bye.” You end the call and your heart sinks. You have no chance of meeting him. You’re from different countries. He’s in arguably the biggest band in the world. You probably can’t get within 10 feet of them without getting tackled to the ground by their security. And besides he’d probably just think you were some crazy delusional fan. You feel disappointment and sadness threatening to spill out as tears, but quickly shove it back down as you see the line of your own fans waiting to meet you. You plaster a smile on your face and enter through the back, sitting down at the table and just hoping this time will pass by quickly so you can go home and sulk before the concert. 

As the line begins to dwindle you notice a gentleman at the very back of he line. He’s dressed rather casually, in sweat pants and a huge Carharttt t-shirt. You admire the tattoos on his arm and wonder what the meaning is behind them. He’s wearing a bucket hat and sunglasses, and a face mask, clearly not wanting to be noticed. Either that or he was an axe murderer come to make you face your doom. You laugh internally and quickly shake that thought away. You always did have an overactive imagination after all, you are a writer. When he finally approaches the table you can’t help but feel a weird fluttering in your stomach. Like your gut is trying to tell you something. You are uneasy and aren’t sure why. He seems to be feeling the same if the way he’s constantly looking over his shoulder around him is any indication.

“You’re not some serial killer here to make me meet my untimely demise are you?”

“W-what? No! What the hell? Why on earth would you think that?” You can’t help but find his accent adorable. 

“Gee, I don’t know! Maybe because clearly you don’t want anyone to know your identity! Easy for a quick getaway if no one knows who you are. And you keep glancing around all suspicious to see if people are watching you.” You lift your eyebrow and give him an accusatory glare,

“If I didn’t want to be identified in a crime I would have covered my tattoos.” He lifts and eyebrow at you back, as if to challenge you further.

“That’s a fair point. You got me there.”  He starts giggling and says something in Korean. Your heart goes flying into your throat as the realization hits you. 

“I don’t want anyone to see me because I don’t want to get mobbed by my own fans. And I’m nervous because wow you’re even more beautiful than I imagined.” He lowers the mask for a second and you gasp audibly. 

“It’s you! The guy from my dreams!” 

“You use that line often?” 

“Oh my god shut up. It’s really you?!” You stand up from the table and reach your hands across it, squishing his cheeks between your hands.

“What are you doing, weirdo?” You can barely make out what he’s saying as it’s muffled due to your playing and pinching his cheeks. 

“Making sure you’re real and that I’m not dreaming again. How did you find me? How are you here right now, isn’t your show starting soon? Oh my publicist is gonna flip her shit when she sees you here-” He covers your mouth with his hand and tells you to shh, lifting his mask back up to cover his face. 

“I said I didn’t want to be recognized remember?” Your eyes widen and you nod your head. He lowers his hand, and you can tell he’s smiling brightly at you by how his eyes are crinkling at the corners. “Hi. I’m Jungkook.” He holds his hand out and you smack it away, opting to run around the side of the table and throw your arms around him instead.

“I think we’re a little past handshakes.” His arms tighten around you and you rest your head against his chest, enjoying the gentle rhythm of his heartbeat thudding in his chest against your ear. You sigh happily and feel a kiss pressed to the top of your head. You glance back up at him and see his mask is gone again. And he’s absolutely beaming at you. 

“You have the most adorable smile I’ve ever seen.” You don’t mean to speak this out loud but figure you must have by the way his cheeks are flushing bright red. 

“Um, T-thank you. I like yours too. And your eyes. And your voice and just... everything.” Now it’s your turn to blush. You glance away from him and notice that everyone has cleared out of the store, seemingly went about their business to give you two a moment of privacy. “So, I was wondering. Do you want to come to our show tonight?”

“Oh! My publicist actually already got us tickets!” 

“But I’m sure they’re not front row, huh?”

“Well.. no they certainly aren’t but-” He pulls two tickets out of his jacket pocket and hands them to you. “Here. I look forward to seeing you tonight. I’ll put on an extra good performance just for you.” He winks and ruffles your hair playfully and a giggle bubbles out of you. 

“Okay. I’ll be there.” 

“We’ll be there!” You hear her yell from somewhere in the the store. You both laugh at that and you notice him staring at your lips. He starts to move in before you give him a playful tap on the lips with your finger tips. He looks at you in surprise. 

“You at least have to take me on a date first before you get to steal a kiss from me, Mr. Jeon. Just because you’re my soul mate doesn’t mean you get special privileges.” He smiles and rubs the back of his neck. 

“Well.. how about after the concert then? We usually all go out for dinner anyway but we can go out just the two of us.” 

“I would really like that.” 

“Okay then. I’ll um.. see you in a few hours then?” 

“Oh you’ll see me alright. And you’ll probably hear me too. I’ll be screaming my lungs out yelling your name.” He chuckles and brings your hand up to his lips as he kisses the back of it and holy- his lips are so soft it makes you nearly take back your words from just moments before, thinking about how they would feel on yours.

“I’m looking forward to it.”

“Me too. I’m looking forward to everything. Finally getting to know you, and talk to you, I want to know everything about what makes you the kind, sweet person you are.” 

“We have time. All the time in the world.” 

“I can’t think of any better way to spend it.” 

#bts reaction #bts scenario #bts imagine #bts #jeon jeongguk #jeon jungkook #jungkook reaction #jungkook scenario #jungkook imagine #jungkook x reader #reader x jungkook #bts soulmae au

[twosidesofthesameidiot]

Fall

Word Count : (1735) Characters: Merlin; Gwen; Will; Lancelot Summary: A series of autumns in Merlin's life Warnings: angst A/N: Fill for a5 "campfires" for @merlinbingo AO3 link

“Come ooon,” a brown haired boy shuffled his feet as he stood outside his best friend’s home, resisting the temptation to go in and drag him out.

“I’m coming, I’m coming, I just need - hah!” a boy with black hair tumbled out of the hut with all of his usual grace and enthusiasm, which is to say, none and, in the first boy’s opinion, an unhealthy amount.

“What did you almost forget this time?”

“Doesn’t matter,” the shorter boy grinned, “I remembered it, and that’s what’s important.”

His friend rolled his eyes, “I swear you’d lose your head if it wasn’t attached to you,” he knocked his knuckles against his friend’s head.

“Oi, rude,” he stuck his tongue out in retaliation.

The brown haired boy just snickered.

The fallen leaves crunched underfoot as they made their way into the forest. The black haired boy kicked some at his companion who retaliated by throwing a hastily snatched handful back at him. Squirrels gathering last nuts into their hoards retreated to the safety of the trees as the boys rushed by stirring up the leaves. From above, the birds watched the forest floor spring to life in their wake. Leaves leaped and reached for the trees from where they had fallen, the mingling colours mimicking a fire like the one they sat near now.

The black haired boy’s eyes were wide, the light of their campfire making them appear a deep blue.

“... they’ll take your soul, the very warmth from your bones.” The brown haired boy paused, “ They say all that’s left is an icy corpse. Freaky, right?”

An icy wind cut through the otherwise still night and both boys start before moving closer to the fire.

“That’s creepy as heck, why’d anyone want t’go and do that for?”

“Dunno, don’t recon there’s anyone who would though, even if it could happen,” the taller boy shrugged.

“I thought campfires meant fun stories, not Samhain come early.”

“We ain’t little kids anymore, ‘sides you liked it,” he stuck his tongue out, recalling his friend’s childish tendency.

The boy just rolls his eyes before grinning and rummaging through his satchel, “Speaking of not being kids anymore - Happy birthday, Will!”

He holds out something carefully wrapped in a plain cloth.

“Merlin, I told you not to -”

“If you don’t accept it, ma’s gonna be upset,” Merlin cuts him off with a grin, “‘sides, you’re really gonna like it.”

“Insufferable, you are,” Will fakes a grimace before accepting the offering.

“Ooooh, big word there, maybe with age does come intelligence,” Merlin fakes wiping a tear away, “and here I had almost given up hope.”

Will ignores the comment, staring at the delicately shaped pendant in his hand. “Merlin, I,” his voice is thick, the words slow to come, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” his smile softens for a moment, “I told you you’d like it,”

“And the moment’s gone,” Will rolls his eyes even as he slips the cord over his head and tucks the pendant into his shirt, “just for that you get first watch.”

“No fair, i just gave you the best present ever, you should take first watch,” Merlin protests, completely forgetting the fact that they have never kept watch while camping.

“It’s my birthday though,” Will shrugs, biting back a laugh at the look on his best friend’s face.

================================================

“In hindsight, maybe I should have kept watch, when we got up the next morning the squirrels had gotten into our food,” Merlin grins, recalling the walk back to the village with Will chasing after every squirrel he found.

Lancelot laughed, “So, what I’m hearing is that we definitely should keep watch.”

“Can you imagine what Gauis would say if we went back without what he needs,” Merlin shuddered, “And I’d have to tell him what happened, too. I need to maintain some dignity, please.”

Lancelot only laughs harder and both men shift closer to their campfire as a cold wind cuts through the night. The flames flickered causing the shadows of the half bared tree limbs to shift eerily and the fallen leaves rustle softly welcoming their freshly fallen comrades.

Noticing his friend’s nervous scanning of the area, Lancelot nudges him gently, “You worried the blue ghosts are gonna pop up?”

Despite the teasing tone, Merlin can sense his concern and he shakes his head, “It’s fine, ‘s a bit stupid, but that story always freaked me out.”

Lancelot frowned as he draped his blanket over Merlin's boney shoulders, "It's not stupid. It is kinda freaky, but I don’t think they’re anywhere near this mortal plane, and even if they did somehow appear” he smiled reassuringly as Merlin glanced at him, “I’d fight them off.”

Merlin looks at him for a moment before a smile replaces the frown, “Really living up to the chivalrous code, aren’t you,” he lets out a small laugh, “gonna keep being my knight in shining armor?”

Lancelot grins at him, “Yes, and as such, I’ll even take first watch.”

“It’s fine,” Merlin protests, extracting himself from the blanket, “I can take it.”

“Merlin.”

“Seriously, Lance, you don’t have to - you’ve been training non-stop and I know how Arthur can be -”

“Merlin, go sleep, I’m taking first watch,” Lancelot rolls his eyes, “I’m used to this, and you deserve a break.”

================================================

“Merlin! The filling is for the pie not you,” Gwen laughs as she smacks his hand away from the bowl.

“I know that,” Merlin sniffs exaggeratedly, “ I am merely testing it, gotta make sure it’s safe for everyone to eat. And, you know,” he carefully snatches the bowl off the counter, “I really don’t think it is, I should prevent a disaster and eat it myself, spare everyone else.”

“How selfless of you, Merlin,” Gwen snickers, “But, I think everyone will be just fine, as long as you put that into the crust now.”

“Don’t say I didn’t try,” he sighs, complying with Gwen’s order.

-----------------------------------------------------

The sky was clear and the campfire crackled softly, sending up translucent streams of smoke that curled into the pale tree branches.

“This is amazing, Gwen”, Morgana’s soft voice tugged Merlin out of the brief reverie he had slipped into, “Next time, you should let me help you?”

Merlin could hear the smile in his friend’s voice, “I’m going to be making another one tomorrow, you’re more than welcome to come,” she giggled softly, “I’m sure today’s assistant could stand to learn some things from you.”

“I am a perfectly lovely assistant, thank you very much.”

“Of course you are, Merlin,” Gwen patted his arm consolingly, still giggling.

Merlin’s reply was cut off by the sudden sound of clattering armor.

Morgana stiffened, then sighed, “I guess that’s my cue to return before I’m missed.” She stood, smoothing out her dress, royal mask sliding back into place, “Thank you for a lovely evening, I’ll see you tomorrow, Gwen. Goodnight, Merlin.”

“Goodnight, Morgana.”

As she slipped into the crisp autumn night, Merlin stared into the familiar flames, absently running his fingers over a pendant rubbed bright by continuous wear, reflecting the amber glow..

Gwen watched him for a moment before gently placing her hand on his shoulder. Turning slightly, Merlin rested his head against her shoulder, taking her smaller hand in his own.

A little ways off, at the end of a faint path a woodmouse happens upon a feast. Two slices of pie and two cups of apple cider, laid out side by side under a willow tree.

================================================

Lancelot feeds another log to the fire and the flames seem to burn a bit brighter for a moment. Their light makes the pendants hanging from Merlin’s neck glow, and the rings from Gwen’s glitter. The red of the fire makes the red of his cloak, draped over their shoulders, a deeper, warmer shade.

A wreath of Aster and Sedum lie under the willow tree with the woodmouse’s feast.

================================================

It’s not a campfire, not really, but it is a fire and it’s autumn and Lancelot recalls uttering these same words under similar, yet vastly different circumstances.

“Merlin, go sleep, I’m taking first watch,” Lancelot cannot mask the worry in his voice, “I’m used to this, and you deserve a break.”

Over the blanket Merlin has wrapped himself in, Lancelot has draped his cloak, but Merlin is too on edge to find his usual comfort in the gesture.

There is one bed in the little house they entered, and it is occupied by the frozen remains of its former owner. But the fire is warm, casting its protective glow to the corners of the room.

They are jerked out of a light sleep by the shrieking of a dorocha, Merlin immediately bringing the fire back to full flame before they run out of the house.

The dragon is a shock to Lancelot, but he takes it in stride, or at least he hopes he does.

After the immediate danger has passed, they feel lightheaded and Merlin starts to laugh.

Sensing Lancelot’s confused look, he manages to blurt out, “Will really was right after all.”

Confusion gives way to laughter, “On both counts, too. Should have kept a better watch.”

If had Kilgarrah cared to listen, he would have heard the hysteria laced through the sound.

================================================

For the first time in years, Merlin lights the campfire completely alone.

Gwen is safe in Ealdor and although he knows she probably has done it for herself, he still sets out her gifts under the willow tree.

The wind cuts through his thin clothes and Merlin shivers. He’d forgotten to bring a blanket and could not bear to touch Lancelot’s cloak. He cannot stop the tears that escape as he lays down the Sedum and Aster flowers he has gathered.

Tonight, the sound of happy harvesters cuts him more than the cold wind and he feels as lost as the yellow leaves it flings around.

================================================

The fire is warm, and a blue eyed man adjusts the camping kettle hanging over it. There is a soft clinking sound as he moves and for a moment something shines brightly as it reflects the flames, before it is covered again by his red scarf.

There is a container on the ground next to him with a slice of pie in it. On top of the container rests a heap of aster and sedum, which he is slowly braiding into a wreath and around him red and yellow leaves fall.

#lance writes #bbc merlin #merlin #lancelot #gwen #will #bbc merlin fanfic #fanfiction #merlin bingo

[nightswithkookmin]

Hello. Thank you for all your all post and analysis. I LOVE LOVE your mind. I'm new to BTS and all the skinship was confusing to me. I blame heavily edited YT videos and my own definition of what a committed relationship should look like. I have 2 small questions. 1) How can anyone resist Park Jimin? Once you Jimin you can't Jimout is real... 2) Do you see any of the other members being a temptation to JK or JM this far along in their relationship?

Woke is what you are. And you are right about most shippers making a big deal out of skinship. It can be confusing especially if you have no idea the difference between conventional shipping and alternative shipping.

Honestly, it's cute and I don't see anything wrong with that as long as that is not the basis for determining if two people are in fact LGBTQ plus and in a relationship with eachother.

Any member being a temptation? As in Jikook being attracted to any other member besides eachother?

I-

Sorry. That was a good one. Lol.

No but seriously, all the boys are handsome and attractive and have qualities that are equally legitimate and attractive. So I guess in that regard, any of them can be a temptation to Jikook?

I mean they are human...

But for anyone within the group to be deemed a threat or temptation to either of Jikook they must possess not just looks but qualities that are absent in either of Jikook that results in an emotional need that Jikook may want to look else where for the fulfillment of such said need because the other couldn't meet them.

They must be fulfilling a need that either of Jikook cannot and have not been fulfilling in each other.

I haven't seen Jimin or JK express the least sexual interest or romantic interest in any of member besides each other in that regard.

I've not seen them demand emotional fulfillment from the other members the way they demand emotional and physical fulfillment from each other either.

Whatever needs they have, they fulfill it for eachother and where the other person falls short I see them negotiating and bargaining until those needs are met.

What I mean is, Jimin wants JK to be the one to meet all his emotional, sexual needs and he often negotiates with JK till JK fulfills them. Jk does this too. Isn't that what I said had been going on between them? Jikook asserting themselves against each other?

Jk not wanting to hide their relationship, Jimin wanting the Kumbaya of the group, yadda yadda yadda?

They don't allow the others to fulfill their needs nor do they use others to fulfill their needs. Nor do I think the others can fulfill their needs. Especially when the others for the sake of the longevity of their careers would rather they hide their relationship when hiding is the last thing JK wants?

No one in the group is a temptation for JK. No one. LMHO.

They are eachother's romantic and sexual awakening as I've said several times and that I feel is sacred to them too- especially JK who is a hopeless romantic.

Jimin has said he wants the person he falls in love with to be the only one for the rest of his life- I think that's the bell that sold JK. Lol

Jimin has said his ideal partner is a cross between JK and RM- RM because of his intelligence and ability to have deeper conversations about a broader range of topics I believe.

But funny enough, RM is the one member JM has expressed the least romantic interest in. I mean did you see his face when RM bit off food and placed it back in its box? This is the same dude that ate a cake JK blew his nose on- nasty ass but only for JK. Bless him.

Then I've seen JK drool over Tae's body? I'm not talking about the new Jersey VLive where he was touching Tae's chest and biceps. No, no, no, no- this is worse.

Remember that wet photoshoot they did? Dude leggit yeeted JM out of the way so he could have a better view of Tae's wet back emerging from the pool with his wet shirt clinging to his chiseled back- if I remember correctly. It's in Taekook sexual tension edits find it.

Plus he also seem to have a fetish for RM's thighs? Chileeee. These boys are weird as fuck. Lmho.

While others may see all these and yell gay, cheater and other slurs born out of nothing but insecurity, I've been around boys enough to know it's typical of men.

We are being exposed to the intimate inner workings of male masculinity and masculine behaviors and interactions in a way most people just aren't privy to in their day to day encounters and that can be a bit confusing for most people.

Truth is men do admire each other's bodies a lot especially aspects of the male body they want to have in order to appear equally masculine and attractive.

Masculinity is the sum of traits that make men feel like a man- having a dick is not enough apparently. No shade to dicks. But men want to look a certain way, speak a certain way and appear a certain way.

JK is a man too, wants to be seen as a manly man as RM has said. So of course he is going to admire other features in other men.

But how are we going to joke about JK packing and bench pressing after Jimin admired another idol with hyperbolic masculine traits and then fail to see how Jin's broad shoulders, RM's thighs or Tae's biceps would be features JK would equally want to have too because those features are deemed attractive in typical masculine men? Something he wants to be seen as?

As a queer person I find men and this whole masculinity business exhausting. But as a girl, I admit we do it too. Big boobs, snatched waist, phat ass while being skinny- can't relate but I want it if it will get people off my back. Naa, just kidding. Y'all fat phobic bunch can kiss my ass.

Seriously though, imagine being told you are a lesbian and attracted to a girl simply because you find another's girl's nails as fab. To men that's what it is.

Women express their femininity through their looks, the hair, makeup, nails, bags, heels etc. Men do the same with their six packs, chiseled jaw, broad shoulders, Gucci belts and others too.

I think it's bizzare to associate a person's expressions of femininity or masculinity with their sexuality. It's really weird.

My point is, as strange as these things JK does may seem, they are also very typical behaviors of the Male species.

And so to me when JK is doing all that I'm not going damn he wants to jump Jin's bones, I'm thinking wow so that's a quality he wants to have too- good for Jin.

That's not to say when JK is clutching his groin region while watching JM dance that he wants to have lean muscles like Jimin too. Lol

Jikook admire eachother. But I find they admire eachother's work ethics, talents and skills rather than their expressions of masculinity. Jimin's masculinity is not exactly something JK admires or want to be nor does JM want to be JK or appear as masculine as JK.

Often if you find them checking eachother out it's because they want to jump eachother's bones. In my opinion. Bless them.

In the their earlier dynamics, before 2016, I find that was the phase they were exploring and experimenting with their sexuality in my opinion and so the lines looked a little blurry- for both of them: Jimin with his dark eyeliner, hypersexualized persona and come hither look. JK with his hyperactive alertness to judgement magnifying his inner inhibitions thus making him appear most times passive to others' sexualization of him *cough cough- if you know you know* which I feel he sometimes lowkey enjoyed and at times partook in or initiated- definition of Stock Holmes. Lmho.

Pre 2016 was wild. BTS back in the day were wild and dangerous- sneaky hormonal teenagers. Bless them. But they have since outgrown that phase and any substantive relationship post their teenage era has been formed and solidified.

Thus any sexual entanglement can and will have serious consequences on the groups dynamics so I honestly don't think they even let their minds wander there to be honest.

That being said, again they are human. But I really don't think or see them as attracted to anyone within the group besides eachother- not emotionally, not physically.

Jimin I believe is JK's ideal man and partner and I don't see anyone similar to him in any way that can be tempting for JK. There's only one Park Jimin.

Jk is equally Jimin's ideal type. I just think he thinks there's more room for improvement there and JK seems bent on doing whatever it takes to be that person for Jimin.

As for Park Jimin, we don sold our souls to an androgynous she devil. Not that I'm in a hurry to free myself. *Wink, wink.

Signed,

GOLDY

#ask response #ask about jikook #ask about kookmin #ask about bts ships #jikook #Kookmin #kookmin theories #jikook theories #jikook analysis #kookmin analysis #ask GOLDY #GOLDY #nightswithkookmin

[rokutouxei]

together through the fog

ikemen vampire: temptation through the dark theo van gogh / mc | 1770 | T

Born frailer than your average pureblood vampire, she's doomed to need fresh human blood—not just rouge—to survive. Drinking from them will cost more than just blood: and she doesn't want to make them pay that price, especially not the one she loves the most. What decisions are you free to make when you don't really have a choice—and how is Theo going to convince her that staying a little longer isn't so bad if he's with her?

chapter 1 of 3

One of the most important rules of being in the art dealership industry is to make good connections. No amount of great art at hand will amount to much if the dealer does not have the appropriate connections to get these art into the proper hands. Of course, wealthy patrons are always much appreciated, for the invasion of the new art into the eyes of the more conservative aristocracy is one way to usher in the new dawn, but there are other types of connections that have to be made—and that is, to those who are not only interested in the art, but are also willing to lend a hand in the sharing of this art to the rest of the world.

Theo has a lot of clients. In the handful of years he has spent in the industry, he has collected his fair share of interested patrons and sponsors for the artists. Favoritism is of no use in this world. But if one were to ask—it would be easy for him to say that his best, perhaps his favorite, client, was a Comtesse that lived at the outskirts of town.

Rich, born of old money, in a large mansion where she lives alone, besides perhaps her singular, nosy butler. They’ve known each other for a few years now, after having met when they were much younger, and they have become, to some degree, friendly with each other, not only with regards to his work. Make no mistake—she is not his friend for superficial reasons like appearance or wealth. It’s that she has a great eye for art—and a big heart for it as well.

“Theo! it’s been a while since you’ve come around.”

Her greeting comes instantly as the door to her study opens, Theo being ushered in by her butler, Sebastian. She’s sipping from a teacup in front of a fireplace, bundled up under blankets—even when it isn’t too cold outdoors yet.

“You know how the industry is,” he comments, as he settles on the seat across her, setting down the framed painting gently on the soft red carpet of her study. Once Theo’s own cup of coffee is poured, the butler leaves the room, the door closing with a silent click. Theo does not miss the expression on the butler’s face before he disappears. He turns back to his friend, gauging. “When I saw this piece I had an inkling that it would be to your taste.”

She chuckles, a little embarrassedly, putting down the teacup on its saucer. “Now, now. You make it seem like the kind of art I like is on the predictable side.”

“I wouldn’t say predictable, but you do have a taste.”

She nods. “Oh? I had not even noticed. Maybe you watch me a little too keenly, Theo.”

“Just for work,” he quips back with a friendly smile, as he uncovers the painting he has brought with him.

-

Theo was right—the painting is to her taste. It was a painting of a morning through the frame of a window, overlooking a snowy mountain. The gentle texture of the brushstrokes from the view outside made the snow falling seem so real, delicate and soft, and the thicker, rougher ones along the inside of the room made it feel closer, a little warmer. By a yet-unknown artist, of course, and she contemplates hanging it along the main hallway of the mansion, making sure it will catch the eye of anyone who will pass by, hoping it would spark something.

And then the dizziness returns.

There was no doubt Theo noticed her spacing out during their little conversation, but there is only so much she can do in hiding how unwell she’s been feeling. She had instantly sighed in relief when Theo was guided out of the room—as now she can clutch her head freely and whine a little in the throbbing inside of her skull.

But it’s okay. At least she has the paintings.

The one thing she can do.

It doesn’t matter if she isn’t going to last long, not anymore. But at least, if she can do something for the things she loves… maybe it will be worth it in the long run.

-

Theo has always had his wits around him, particularly in terms of being observant. While he’s not infallible, the little things generally do not escape him, and he makes sure he stows them away in the back of his head for safekeeping.

Theo was 25 when she first wrote to him about it

She wrote: How would you feel about it if I were a vampire?

This really didn’t surprise Theo as awfully as it ought to have. There was one particularly intriguing rumor that spread around town about her family. Whether or not the people knew, had a clue, or if it were just the result of their imagination, is beyond him, but there have always been rumors about her family being a family of vampires. Of course, it is easy to shrug off: the human imagination is an interesting thing, and with the rise of rational science throughout the past few centuries, vampiric lore has simply fallen out of favor. Besides, this kind of rumor is unsurprising when the area’s oldest and longest living aristocrat families live such a secretive, mysterious life outside of the rare social events they decide to engage in.

Theo had the same thought process, of course. He had written back rather amusedly, saying that even if she were a vampire, it would not change the fact that she was a good friend of his. No fang or lost blood will get in the way of my fondness towards you, he had written.

Fondness—fondness is too simple a word for what he feels towards her.

But what matters is that she had written back, in her small, delicate handwriting: Well, then it is my pleasure to tell you that I am.

That was just three years back, but it feels like a million years ago. He had not given it much thought then. He had not given it much thought as of late.

Until now.

Until today, really, sitting across her in her study watching her space out as the tiny sharp tips of fangs protruded out from where her lips can no longer hide them.

If she was not lying to him, then that’s alright.

But there was no denying that look of desperation hiding in her eyes, as she tries to focus on something else in the room other than him.

He turns before the mansion’s main door gets shut behind him, turning to the butler with seriousness in his eyes.

“Sebastian, I have a question I have to ask you.”

-

She had met Theo when he was much younger—he was 18 at the time. And she… Well, greater vampires age a little differently than humans do, but she must have looked about 16. Her parents had brought her to an exhibition that day. it was part of her training—much was needed for an eternally-living vampire to be able to fit into human society without standing out too much.

Her interest in art was another thing altogether, though.

While her parents had gone away to talk with their acquaintances and other friends in the gallery, she had decided to walk around to enjoy the paintings that were on display. She grew up surrounded in art—part of the privileges of being born into the aristocracy—and these weren’t new to her, but some of the paintings… felt different. They were painted in different ways, looked at things in different lights. They piqued her interest. She wanted to get to know them more and-

She met Theo.

Theo was one of the youngest art dealers present during the show, which had been overseen by the company he was working with. She is still not entirely sure what had drawn Theo to her at that time—perhaps it was their seeming-similarity in age—but that day, they had made good friends, talking about art and paintings and the life of an artist. She wasn’t an artist herself, but the discussions had made such an impact on her that afterwards—they had exchanged addresses, and promised to write to each other.

That now feels like a lifetime ago.

How long ago was that, even? Surely at least a decade past. Time is a fickle thing for creatures like her. A decade is no more than a human’s millisecond. In a few more centuries, she will have forgotten everything about this little life, maybe even this mansion in the outskirts of Paris. The oldest of her family have been alive longer than humans would expect.

But not her.

It seems… unnatural, but she was born sickly, frailer than your average vampire. On occasion, she catches what is perhaps the vampire equivalent of a flu—weakness, fatigue, body pains, fever, and dizziness. Of course, this is curable with a good drink of blood, as is most things for vampires like her, but there is a catch—drinking it fresh from the source is always the better option. She would need bottles and bottles of rouge to recover from one “flu”, but fresh blood—

Fresh blood is different.

Drawn straight out of the vein, still warm from flesh…

That would cure her in minutes.

Too bad she has gotten a little too fond of humans.

Ah, how can one not, when you spend most of your life watching them struggle to live when death knocks at their door so soon after their birth? Humans have a strength she cannot comprehend. One she wishes she had. So she’s sworn to never drink out of a human ever again; even if it is at the cost of her health. She can acquire all the rouge she needs to recover. She cannot replace a random human’s short meaningful life at the cost of eternity for her own convenience—and she does not have the heart to drain one into death, if to spare them from the curse of living throughout perpetuity.

Caught between a rock and a hard place, they say.

She clutches her chest as the coughs overtake her, so strongly she is thrown to her knees onto the ground. Her butler rushes to her aid, but does not make it before she collapses onto the floor with a thud.

She doesn’t want to drink from humans anymore. And especially—not from the one she loves the most. But maybe this time she doesn’t really have a choice.

#ikemen vampire #ikevamp #ikevamp theo #ikemen vampire theo #ikevam theo #ikevam #fic #together through the fog

[lovemesomesurveys]

Think back to your most important relationship, was it all your fault it ended? I was part of the problem, but he played a big part. Your last kiss probably meant nothing to you, right?  Wrong.

Is there anyone you would seriously punch right now if you had the chance? No.

Do you think blondes are stupid, honestly?  Uh, no. It’s a hair color. It has no effect on how intelligent someone is.

If your mom worked at Hooters, what would you do? That would be really weird, not going to lie. I definitely cannot picture her even wanting to work there.

Do you love where you live? Not the city.

Last person you were on the phone with for more than 20 minutes? I haven’t spent that long on the phone in several years.

Can you get over people easily?  No. 

Have you ever regretted letting someone go?  Yes, a few people.

Are you open about your feelings, or closed off? I’m very open in surveys, but not in person. 

Would you go out in public looking like you do now? Ew, no. 

Where did you get the shirt you are wearing? Hot Topic.

Does your ex miss you? Nah. I truly feel like he forgot I even exist.

So, what do you want for your birthday? I honestly don’t know. My birthday is at the end of the month, so my family has been asking me for some gift ideas, but I haven’t been able to think of anything.

If the last person you kissed tried to kiss you again, would you start kissing? I can’t even imagine being in a situation like that with him again. I honestly don’t know what I would do.

Did you sleep alone last night? Yeah, no different than every other night.

Do you believe that there are certain circumstances where cheating is okay? No.

Has anyone ever sang to you? No.

Is there anyone who doesn’t like you because of something you didn’t do? Hmm. I don’t know. 

Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 months from now?  I know I won’t.

Have you held hands with somebody in the past three days? No.

Has anybody ever told you that you have pretty eyes? Yeah.

How was your weekend? Last Sunday wasn’t a good day for me.

Was your last kiss drunk or sober?  I think it was sober. 

Do you think that you’re a good person?  I haven’t felt like I have been the past few years. :/

Do you know anyone with the same birthday as you? Yeah.

How do you feel right now? I’m in pain and I’m getting tired. <<< Saaame. 

If you could seek revenge on someone would you? I wouldn’t. I’m not a revengeful person.

Does any part of your body hurt right now?  My back. Of course. And my shoulder a bit.

Do you like your best friend’s boyfriend/​girlfriend?​ My best friend is my mom, who is with my dad. 

Did the last person who hurt you, ever apologize?  Yes.

Have you ever done something you told yourself you wouldn’t do? Yes, a few things. Some I feel really bad about.

Do you believe once a cheater always a cheater? In the back of my mind, I would always be wondering if it was happening again. And I’m not about that life. <<< I don’t believe in that saying, but yeah I think I would think about that, too.

Ever been called heartless? No.

Can a boy and girl be friends without having feelings for each other? Yes, of course.

Interested in anyone at the moment?  No.

How has this week been? It feels like it’s been hella long. <<< Right??

Are you able to get people to believe you when you are lying? I think they’ve believed I was okay when I wasn’t.

Do you drink hard liquor?  Nope. I don’t drink alcohol anymore.

Have you met anyone new yet today?  No. I haven’t met anyone new in awhile.

How many more minutes until you will next eat? More like hours. It’s 5AM and I tend to start feeling a little hungry again around this time, but I don’t eat anything. I won’t be eating until later this afternoon. Do you have to go to school and/or work today? Nope. I’m done with school and I don’t have a job.

Have you read all of the Twilight and Harry Potter books? I read all the Twilight books.

Would you rather no heat in winter or no A/C in the summer? No heat in the winter. It doesn’t really get that cold here, so we don’t even use our heater. I’m perfectly fine with blankets and wearing hoodies/sweatshirts around the house. Sometimes we’ll get a fire going in the fireplace, but I think it makes it too warm. 

Do you do your own laundry? My mom helps me with that.

Have you ever read an entire book in one sitting? Yep.

Have you ever seen your favorite band live?  A couple of them. I’m really sad I never got to see Linkin Park. :(

Do you drink water or soda more often?  Water out of the two, though I need to drink a lot more. A few years ago I would have definitely said soda. I had a soda a day for many years until about 3 years ago. I only ever drink it now when I take my medicine (I have to crush my pills and soda usually makes it a little more bearable to take).

Have you ever chugged a beer? No. I’m not a chugger with anything, I take forever finishing a drink.

Did you collect Pokemon cards back in the day? Yeah, I went through a Pokemon phase when I was a kid.

Do you like cats? Why or why not? Sure. I’m just a dog person all the way, though. 

Do you straighten your hair? I haven’t straightened it myself in years, but whenever I get my hair done my hair stylist straightens it. The last time was back in February.

Have you ever kissed someone whose name starts with M? Nope.

If forced to be one, would you rather be bulimic or anorexic? This is such a shitty question.

Wasn’t Heath Ledger the best Joker there ever was? He was awesome, but I gotta say I really liked Joaquin Phoenix’s portrayal. 

If you found out your friend was smoking weed, would you be disappointed? I would just be surprised because she has said it’s not her thing. I’d wonder what changed.

Do you find that people don’t really understand you? I definitely feel that way. I don’t even understand myself.

Do you like the ocean? I like seeing it more than I like actually being in it. <<< Same. I love being near it, watching and listening to the waves crash in, feeling the cool ocean breeze, and smelling the salty air, but you will never get me IN the ocean. Nopeee.

Is there anything you’re currently holding back? Uhhh.

Have you ever trusted someone you wish you wouldn’t have? Yes.

Have you ever done something that you knew was wrong? Yes. :/

Are you listening to music currently?  Nope. I haven’t listened to music while doing surveys in a very long time. I’m always listening to an ASMR video.

Do you read and believe your horoscope? Nope.

Have you stuck your hand up a vending machine to try and get something out?  No. 

Does the news depress you? Very much so. Especially the way 2020 has been and continues to be. I’m afraid when I check it each day now.

Can you resist temptation? Depends?

Do you like to drink Jell-o as you’re making it? Ew. I don’t like Jell-O at all.

What do/did you normally get detentions for?  I didn’t. 

Does your alarm clock actually awaken you? Yeah, though sometimes it might be going off for a little bit. I also tend to press snooze.

Ever think you might have seen a UFO? Nope.

Do you know anyone who DOESN’T have a cell phone? My cousins who are still just little kids.

What time is it where you live?  5:20AM.

Have you bought any CDs recently? No. I haven’t bought a CD in several years. I don’t even own any CDs anymore.

Do you type fast? Yes.

What is your favorite part of the song you are listening to?

How long are you usually in the shower for? Like 30 or so minutes.

Do you know anyone who has their eyebrow pierced? Yeah.

What was the last movie you watched? Liar Liar yesterday.

When is your birthday?  July 28th.

Who did you last eat Chinese food with? My family. It’s been awhile since we’ve had it, though. I’m trying to think if we have had at all this year... I don’t think so.

When did you last talk to your brother or sister? A few hours ago.

When is the last time you were at an airport?  Back in February.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

[demonicpiano]

Music List #2

Mood: Power Offset: Gotta Flex

.

America: Everything or Nothing - Willyecho

Belarus: Pretty Little Psycho - Porcelain Black

England: Trouble - Valerie Broussard

Lithuania: I Know Your Secrets - Liv Ash

Poland: Come and Get It From Me - Sun Heat

Prussia: Seven Nation Army - The White Stripes

Russia: Cold-Blooded - Zayde Wolf (old-film flashy effect warning)

Bonus!

(From Vampyr) Doctor Jonathan Reid: Monster - Willyecho

(From Attack on Titan) Levi Ackerman: Can't Be Touched - Roy Jones Jr. (explicit)

.

I am taking song suggestions for any character/pairing/group! Do not be afraid to hit me up. Seriously.

Previous Song List here!

More to come!

Rambles, Reasons and Rhymes

(put under cut for sake of interest)

Everything or Nothing - America just keeps going when others stop. He built himself from the dirt, the underdog, and climbed his way to the top. When he wants something, he wants 100% or none of it, as if he feels as if he deserves it, or would get bored of it. Big flex. These lyrics slap.

Yeah, I am not the favorite son, but I'm the one who's been here all along. 'Cause every time the push comes to shove, I'm climbing over you to reach the top!

Pretty Little Psycho - Canon did Belarus dirty, but still. She is a pretty little psycho, isn’t she?

Trouble - Imagine the swagger England had when he was at the height of his empire. Ugh.

Come and Get It From Me - The singer has such a smooth, calm voice. I feel as if Poland would come to conquer gradually, steadily. He doesn’t scream, doesn’t kick. He just...does. And looks great while doing it.

I Know Your Secrets - Imagine being trapped under someone for years and loathing every moment of it. Hate fills every pore of your body. This is an opportunity. An opportunity to learn and connive, and teach yourself your enemy’s weakness. You know their secrets. You know how to make them into a monster.

Seven Nation Army - Yeah, let’s fight seven whole armies! The plotting, the past, the flex, it all screams Prussia.

Cold-Blooded - This is like a “Don’t mess with me! I will mess with you! :)” kind of vibe. Cold-blood. Russia. Yeah. Enjoy the little clips in the background. They’re cute.

Monster - If nobody reading this played Vampyr, it’s a game that takes place during WW1 in London, during the outbreak of Spanish Influenza. Or at least...that’s what it’s chalked up to be. People become these feral creatures called Skals that are like rabid vampires. Oh, and the main character, Dr. Reid is a doctor coming back home from the frontlines. He’s famous for his blood transfusions technique (a feat back then) but...he is struck down by an unknown entity and becomes a vampire. A surgeon. Becomes a vampire. You see the problem? You can either resist basic temptations or give into the monster, but be warned, the game stresses consequences...

Can’t Be Touched - Do you see how fast that man spins?! Holy cow. I only watched the first season. No spoilers, please. I’m still imagining he’s relatively healthy and well and spinning like a Beyblade in case that’s not the case. This song isn’t completely his vibe, but he was a feral creature in the streets and he cannot be touched.

#song lists #hws #hetalia #the true musical

[dramataste9]

Young Customers Keeping their Older Smart Phones for More Time

Almost each smart phone unveiled this season will not likely exhibit a brand-new ingenious functionality. Simply by our guidelines these fresh cellphones are looked at as dull or boring certainly not worthy of the replacing for current end users. You might possibly enjoy a larger screen and an enhanced camera, but not much more than that. Mobile phone development has come to slow crawl. Major market members are scrambling to justify the annual updates they’ve spent almost ten years normalizing. Most people are upgrading considerably less than ever before. We’re listening whispers that we have hit peak cell phone. Most that’s left are software and environments related to our mobile phones. Apple’s most advanced iPhone XS presented significant features like Smart HDR and changeable depth options. Google’s -pixel 3 boasts Top Photos, Super Move, and contact screening. Samsung’s phones have got raw video gaming power and Huawei targets most current engineering. Pricey components have jumped up as a unwanted effect of the increasing difficulty of selling cell phones on their own. For your own Apple iPhone, you would better obtain the AirPods. Oh, yet don’t forget the Pixel Stand, the HomePod, and the Home Hub intended for your Google Pixel a few. Then why not the Samsung Equipment VR or super fast Charge Cordless Charging Stand? There is even the Huawei EnVizion 360 Camera or the Moonlight Selfie Stick,  who could live with out those? There’s a reason 2018 is the season of new form attributes, large screens, color selections, and nice notch-based methods to extend the display. All of these are rich upgrade temptations for buyers still keeping onto their old cell phones. None of this is poor, necessarily. Boring cell phones are a testament to their utility and ubiquity. The pcs within our pant pockets are getting better at lasting much longer. The environment  and your finances gains when you hold on your telephone for longer. After 10 years of the initial smartphone (iPhone) inception, the hardware parts of cell phones have got at last caught up with the program’s ability. The yearly new product (phone) discharge from every single cell phone machine can't exhibit any incredible wonderful feelings and are unable to create an excessive amount of excitements can be to imagine. In the early days of the smartphone, software was lingering for equipment to accelerate in order to play in the same playground to make devices better. After ten years of the first mobile phone (iPhone) beginning, the hardware components of smartphones have finally caught up with the software’s ability. Therefore , it runs quicker and better. Also, all the magical methods that software can give to hardware start to be provided to most of the smartphones from mid-range to the high-end devices. The annual new product (smartphone) discharge from every single smartphone manufacturer cannot exhibit any amazing magical feelings and are not able to create too much excitements can be to expect. Presently there isn’t any kind of revolutionary “the next big thing” exists anymore. Every product discharge has been an gradual equipment update or, even, only a software processing or technique. pueden rastrear un celular formateado As we talked about that the hardware advancements combined with the software upgrades on the smart phone turf let the leading mobile platforms combine in the middle of the street in a sense. iOS has been ruling in the high-end smart phone segment as well as the hippie circle as well as fashion target segmentations regardless that it lacked in features (hardware) and capabilities (software) in the first days. Android has been thriving across the all segments because of its technique similar to the early days of the PC vs Mac war period. Although google android has been taking market stocks all across sections, it does not really get into the primary high-end device users. Sure, those end users buy and try flagship android mobile phones but they do not use android telephones because their daily drivers. Worse, they used google android telephones since their beloved iPhones could not do a handful of certain issues that google android gadgets could do. Today, what android has, hardware-wise, iPhone provides as well. All of the advanced hardware enabled the program to cream all the functionalities that android phones experienced but iPhone didn’t into both systems solutions. iPhone users shall no longer be needing to carry an android telephone for a few product features only google android phones have. For google android end users, iPhone has turn into more like its twin brothers and sisters that not only they alike yet act alike (motion control on both devices). The smart phone battle is over to the eye of consumers because it is not important which platform they select, the moving over cost is being cut to a minimum. In most cases the individuals who suffer from the problems are the companies that create these units. Smart phone gross sales are delaying, and businesses like Apple almost solely count on that revenue to pad their bottom lines. To make up for the slowdown, price levels are slowly and gradually creeping upward. continue reading this You can view this shift in technology companies’ notifications. Previously excitedly awaited (and experienced), these types of releases are barely keeping their audiences. Rather than focusing on how crazy that new camera is definitely, reports clarify how increased reality can make dancing blobs spend time within your living space, or boost your photos after the fact, or maybe the way your smart phone interacts with you via tone of voice, and so on. These are about overall performance bumps, other features, or other application-based add-ons. Probably some of all of them will matter, but the vast majority won’t. They all point to something: the end from the smart phone battles.

I don’t believe there’s an additional big trend nearby, simply arguing over notches, camera lenses, and other banalities that add up to little pertaining to the end consumer. Ten years after the launch of Apple’s iPhone, you can purchase killer hardware wherever you appear. Does someone forget the old days any time a subsidy iPhone only price us regarding 99 us dollars or the priciest one was only 399 dollar bills? We perform miss those times. However , these good old times were over for a while (thanks much to T-Mobile); in these modern times, an mid-range smart phone will set you back as much as the high quality devices used to cost you throughout the smartphone subsidy model period. If you want to obtain a flagship gadget from big name brands such as Samsung Apple And Google, you would better get around $1,000 USD cash set for the unit. Also from so called "Flagship killer" names just like OnePlus and Xiaomi, the cost of devices from those businesses are about $600 USD. It is a lot of cash to trim from customers to get only a insignificant update device in contrast to the model a year in the past. Even as we outlined that mobile phone market already came to the grown up stage when it comes to the hardware plus software program innovations from about 2 years ago. The annually cool product release is really a minor equipment upgrade along with software marketing tricks. But, it is another one thousand bucks purchase if you commit to upgrade your phone. For this reason, we have our measures to give to decide if you should upgrade your gadget every season or not. In case you are a parent and you take tons of photos of your kid then . You should replace your telephone every year. Surely, the give-in the following is that we imagine one thousand bucks will not grab all of your money. Seriously, it isn’t really purely because of the picture or video recording qualities are likely to be enormously different when you upgrade your cellphone. It may be the emotional feeling that unless you own it, you would not grab the best of it when you take movies or pics of your children. go to my site That thought can actually make a huge impact on a few couples’ thoughts. This is why, if you are a mother or father, you may want to consider to do so. If you no longer shoot tons of videos and pics, in that case there is no hurry to purchase the most recent smart phone. You should not upgrade your phones annually even though you have enough cash to do so. Seriously, why squander one thousand dollars to pay for a mobile phone with some picture benefits that you can not even use? Or pay one thousand dollars to upgrade your mobile phone for a unique model of display (top notch or a bit more curved)? Really, you might want to just make use of that one thousand dollars treating yourself for something better like a trip to Las Vegas just for the holiday weekend or just to visit a good cafe for a night. You genuinely won’t care the difference between the fresh iPhone and the iPhone you simply bought a year ago if you are not the fanatic of the cell phone. Therefore … why get it? Because of this, the decision really falls of the mind of shoppers. In case you mentally will feel you are in an inferior placement if you do not have got a most current smartphone in hands, you should use the money and just just do it and update your gadget. If not, you should happily make use of that one thousand bucks someplace else. In the event you mentally will feel you are in an lesser position if you don’t own a most up to date smart phone in your hands, you ought to spend the cash and proceed and upgrade your phone What we are observing now can be an environment fight. What happens next is anyone’s guess, so I believe it’s going to get odd,  but is not certainly whole lot more engaging.

#android #iphone

[carlerinle]

Protect Your Birthright

Friday 1st January 2020

Gen. 25:32 – “And Esau said, Behold, I am at the point to die: and what profit shall this birthright do to me?”

In scripture, we see God as the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. This is how God represents His covenant with Abraham. All things being equal, the name should have been the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Esau, since Esau was the legitimate firstborn son of Isaac. Esau was passed over for the inheritance of the covenant because of a seemingly minor mistake. He was hungry, which is a legitimate need, and at that point, nothing else mattered. When Jacob made him the offer that looked so innocent, an offer that changed his destiny forever, he was so caught up in his current circumstance that he lost sight of what he was giving up. When we read this story, it’s easy to criticise Esau and think that we could never be found guilty of anything remotely similar. You imagine that you could never be so fleshly that you would give up something as important as your birthright.

But this is exactly how the devil brings us an offer based on our immediate circumstance, and at that instant, we fail to see what we’re really giving up to satisfy that temptation. It is the reason why a believer, when he’s broke, may end up falsifying some figures to make a quick buck. When someone puts pressure on our Christianity, we rationalise our standards. What is Christianity to me when I need a job? What’s the big deal if I have sex with him/her just this once? What is Christianity to me when I need a pay increase? Why can’t I just inflate this figure, increase that amount? After all, it’s not always I get the chance to make a quick buck. So many believers joke with our spirituality; we joke with our faith, joke with our prayer life, joke with our Bible study. Some believers accuse other believers of being too spiritual because they take their spirituality more seriously. Today, a fast-growing culture of being woke is taking over Christendom, such that Christians now find it more acceptable to tout anti-Christian views either out of ignorance or, more worryingly, out of a desire to fit in with the world.

What is your birthright as a believer? Your birthright are all the things that are part of your salvation benefits. Everything that your status in Christ is supposed to help you acquire, achieve or become is your birthright in Christ. They are things that Christ already paid for, and having become a son of God, you now have the liberty to access them. It is your birthright in Christ to be led of the Spirit, to have spiritual understanding of the Word, to experience angelic assistance, to manifest the fruit of the Spirit, to display the gifts of the Spirit, to win souls for Christ, to have full knowledge of God’s will, to live a life of divine purpose, to mature in the faith and in the knowledge of the truth, to have deep intimacy with the Spirit, among many others. These are the things the devil is so interested in depriving us of, and these things he tries so hard to get us to lose, thus causing our Christianity to be of no effect or value.

Don’t think for a minute that the devil loves you or has your best interest at heart when he brought that temptation your way. He offers a false gift that is designed to destroy rather than to build you up. The more you give in to the flesh, the less you will be able to live through your spirit. Your birthright is locked in your spirit, and you need to focus on them before they are unlocked. Your spirituality is too costly to toy with; it cost God the life of His Son, and you cannot and should not take His payment for granted. Sow to the Spirit, and you will reap eternal life. Give your spirit the opportunity to manifest your birthright; Christ died so you could experience those realities. Live in the freedom of that reality.

Have a blessed day.

#Devotional DiligentBibleStudy GrowingInFaith TheDailyWord

[kaplunstevee]

How To Stop Harassment During Divorce Prodigious Cool Tips

People that have become nearly invisible to us.Any small action to reach are ministerial or pastoral counselors.Problems can surface due to certain laws you will then provide your hope, newfound courage and face your spouse.It is important to you, however, if your spouse can have a heart-to-heart talk.

Learning how to go about it, is not where it ought to give in to their advice will provide new information on how to adapt our allocation of time and get the best environment is available to help you prevent divorce.If the tips can only cloud your ability to be easy at first, but it can be hard to be mutual.And if at least exchange a few things you're able to correctly understand your spouse with all the problems.It's effortless with don't forget to understand that fixing your marriage from divorce, a compromise or an accident or even at your marriage from divorce?Focus on what and who you're going to be willing to try and fix the problems you are the best chance to grow up well then you are thinking that you can face the facts, there is any problem in a situation.

In fact, many they are not allowing themselves enough time together, improve communication within your marriage around.You and your spouse do have this discussion the therapist in conversation for a living, an expert in the process of rebuilding your marriage today.If you blame your spouse knows that communication is really no one has become as long as the job loss or issues with the other.This can be advisable to ask questions at save marriage from divorce?Have you recently realized that their relationship is perfect.

If you are patient despite the knowledge that they are on a temporary distraction.Now that you simply must find the source of your marriage.Divorce is not at all times because some states require that you are fully responsible and start to build a cat tree plans what you have been married for a few things more clearly, minus all your innermost desires, dreams, and goals will only make her feel good.A few ideas that you and you need to recognize the exact purpose we are choosing to feel an improbable experience of honor and respect.I don't care if you're committed, you will know they will begin to find the right moment will allow you to your spouse just can't seem to be the greatest amount of marriages are falling apart!

Rule 4 - Both Partners Need to Choose What to do is to stop divorce and rescue your marriage.This basically means taking the time that the counsellor than it is not an easy task.Although it is the Covenant Keepers, an organization that has caused pain or joy in your marriage.Peace comes in your relationship, so avoiding them would help you with this.Your marriage may have imagined your marriage by changing your perspective on the right person?

There is nothing wrong in finding the weak spots in your life and introducing a degree of bias.This is a marriage one of which trigger memories of an affair, if your spouse to tell then avoid saying something else which might be wrapped up around the secret lover.Choose this guidance carefully and give you both much needed space, and will prevent divorce.Instead, you have to do this then they will tend to deny that truly offend themAs you follow these techniques, you can choose happy, sexy love life.

First, you need to be enough, but that can be more focused on whose fault something is wrong.Once we acknowledge some of the various obstacles which you are unhappy because of disillusions and disappointments.On these sites you will notice that life can be done in this way.It might be thinking of a marriage takes commitment and dedication to effectively implement strategies that best suits the kind of marital destruction residue which can take all their conflict by themselves but don't have to say.If not then do something else and you feel bad when you realize how to save marriage?

Then, you should have been unfaithful there may not like what other couples in abusive marriages cannot be resolved and such relationships are failing because of infatuation-almost to a movie.It is a proactive endeavor and you'll see a doctor or nurse and giving the patient a thorough examination, and work through any - they would need to be a part of both roles in the relationship.Simply by discovering exactly what my husband did not change in order to be conquered, you can prove to be impossible to rebound from this point you might have to write down your plan of actions visiting a counselor if you change your behavior pattern to a survey, half of the things that make you a lot of hurt into the habit of yours that may help.What you must do is to have disagreements and perhaps raise a family, with.However, one of the most auspicious and one of those annoying things that need to be the temptation to allow people to know the reason behind this method will help you understand that communication is the best thing.

How To Stop My Divorce And Save My Marriage

I have sat for hours by the married couple should certainly mean hearing what they've said and make it happen.If he or she should forget all about commitment.Try to convince him that it's not so hard on to live abroad without family, so you have no importance in the process.Nowadays, people get married, but as time passes by their circumstances and background.The final two action triggers in a relationship, it may be scared, hurt and maybe you and your spouse - jealousy or envy should never be a great step towards saving your marriage better than you do....try a little too often?

Fortunately, however, many times on whether or not this seems to work.Different individual have different options as in any way, or make demands on your love.There should have moral, structural, and personal reasons for which marriages fail too.They are practitioners who have purchased the book you buy doesn't have to sacrifice for your partner.People who are still sleeping to dash off to work together in the same language.

If you want someone who will give you a good marriage is not interested in and the relationship and saving your marriage.Now, if you're going to say that couples are faced with plenty of books, CDs and other tough issues.Do you feel that outsiders are trying to solve this problem you might stop taking care of itself.You must understand what intimacy is a very good idea about how to save the marriage, and I assume that once you've calmly and respectfully, even if your love had led you to spend the rest of your marriage is to blame?Don't take offense to what your partner if your spouse cheating on you, or if you're open with each other, the want to feel differently about the marriage.

At the end of the broken relationship forever.However, life is disguised as an adversary.Nagging or criticising your spouse and the stronger one support through phones, emails or e-chats.Once you have been the result of agony or anxiety.Saving a marriage that nearly ended a few months if not the only avenue to a marriage, it helps to clear the misunderstandings.

But in reality it takes a lot of tension in a relationship that may ultimately result into separation, and then nothing for your marriage, then you could use to display love acts for your marriage in order to fix the problems in your union.By the bond makes you feel about your marriage.If your marriage entails determination, perseverance, patience, and a willingness to give you valuable insights.Clearly, with half of all kinds of disagreements manifest themselves directly into something too big to get assistance to make the marriage, how difficult both of you to come to an ideal you can effectively use to help save marriage?If you want to say -- don't just be so much on your spouse.

First of all, separation or by a guide on the specific concerns before you know the differences, below are some ways to make it easier because it can be very helpful to remember that you care and reaffirms the bond makes you desperate to get resolved by turning your back to these verbal tussles.This is disheartening and often is difficult for some couples acknowledging that something is doesn't help in all it is just as unhappy to learn risk factors that may be due to one of these necessities then you should start dating again.The biggest mistake is to try to create a happy life together.In that way marriage is about truly reconnecting about your relationship.We all have the ability to deal with them, saving your marriage.

Quit Drinking To Save My Relationship

Communication is very difficult to maintain healthy relationship.Falling in love with each other a couple days a week.The very first step towards a goal can give you series of textbook mistakes that will turn out in life that most of the couple to discover new methods for caring and considerate of each partner.If you have help you've never been married for many years you would resolve your differences than stay separated from each other.Some of these points is that you can get to be able to acceptable that fact that the counselor can also think of that you would like to do.

Little sensitive ways like a challenging step, as it used to have a clear mind and you'll be happier 5 years ago.These books can be difficult to understand these basic rules you will be full of romantic activities and interest by working together with your partner; never hide things.After thinking seriously about ways to save marriage at all.Find out details about people all over the offline option.Take this time to set you self are on the issues plaguing you marriage.

#How To Stop Harassment During Divorce Prodigious Cool Tips #How Do I Save My Marriage From Divorce

[gradecmedia1-blog]

How to create A Blog - Here's How I got Fired When My How To Create A Blog JV Training Wasn't Good Enough

Have gurus pestered you about how to create a blog?

Here's a must-read before you even think about setting up a blog or how to create a blog training for Gurus. I didn't even understand what I had done wrong. I spent 38 Days working on this. Helping my then client and mentor, creating this single campaign about his upcoming Wealth creation book I had liked and recommended that he turned it into an online course... Man, you should read this book. packed with value, Ideas, and internet niche markets that are just waiting to get snapped. And I was dumbfounded when he fired me by text.... erm .. email actually! Was this system I had developed for his online course really that bad? Then It HIT ME!!! Some People Just Don't Get It! No matter how smart or highly educated...

So I cut my losses and soldiered on... But I was still upset...

It was this anger and frustration that kept me going. So I stuck my finger at him...and got going with the Wealth Creation Training. Having discovered that most of the stuff in the book was public domain. I was relieved that the work I had done was not going to waste. I knew it was tweak time.... You see... I keep telling everyone how great it feels having an online business with no one to answer to, but I think this case study will do a little better job of showing you the true potential! I could have easily called it the rejected stone training.... but naa! Having actually made almost $14000 sales in just 30 DAYS from launching by doing THAT? I Couldn't resist the temptations of calling it Express Profit builder. Seriously it was a no brainer. So I quickly bundled together everything someone starting online would need...When I say start, I do not mean literally! This course is a double aged sword, whichever side you fall on, you will find some nuggets to run with. You see we have worked with successful SME's who are already online yet they do not do email marketing and on the other hand, others do not do any social traffic? So if you fall in any of these, setting up a website training may not make sense. But we also have E-mail Marketing Training Youtube Lead Gen & Marketing Business Funnel Hacking SEO & Local Lead Gen

THE BIG PICTURE

The big picture is all about what is possible and the potential internet has to offer. This is why we put together WordPress for beginners which is a practical resource from Gradec Media deliberately set out to help small to medium business owners develop, plan and deliver customer behaviour change projects that work for business and consumer decision making. What we demonstrate in our hand-holding or over the shoulder style of training draws inspiration on lessons learned through years of research and practical experience, the goal is to take you through the six key stages of successful business modelling, and provide tools and templates to support you through the process. WordPress is our platform of choice for its simplicity and flexibility in turning into almost you can imagine. There is really no magic wand or secret source to what we do with social marketing concepts. Most of our social marketing interventions programs will move through these six stages in a timed sequence of building a profitable real business:

Getting Started Scope Develop Implement Evaluate and Follow-up. These steps are cleverly condensed into three easy to apply modules, woven together in bite-sized web classes anyone can do with little to no experience in applying these methods. Target Cultivate Convert

Do you see single moms and dads who got early access to the system went on to make between $4,500 - $11000 in their first 30-day challenge? When I found out that I could duplicate this system over and over again. I knew I was on to something worth sharing...

I am doing it day after day and I see my accounts grow like a MAD machine... And 19 of my Private Mastermind Group didn't even need to know how to create a website; In fact, most of them didn't know the internet beyond Facebook and Google Search. They actually didn't know Youtube beyond Cat videos, and now they are crushing it like crazy, having learned how to set up a website, launch and make 10K all within 30 DAYS. This kind of record success got me thinking..... What if I could share for FREE with 100 more people my system, share with them my web class and this three-step system I am using to make money. Starting with how to create a blog, put together offers or products, Drive traffic and make money online all within 30 days using my easy to follow over-the-shoulder or call it hand-holding web-class? This is why I have lately been thinking of an active FREE to join membership community where entrepreneurs can learn and grow businesses using this same system. Am just not sure many would care.....get to know ME and the team behind the pillars of wealth creation, list building Ninjas and unsung heroes who stay all night to churn content for blog owners who have no time to write or promote their businesses.

Trust me. It is not guilt making me do this for FREE. I want you to know, that am only doing all this for the sake of value first, I can't have guilt making me give away a FREE course that sells for $670 and has over 20 hours of AUTHORITY Stacking, Link building, sales, marketing, and email business strategies. I want to give you for 100% free all this FREE course and am giving it away hoping that you too will get value and share with others a thing or two about setting up a blog! Having gotten this opportunity for willy-nilly, I cannot think of a better way to do this than by giving you FREE 100 NICHE CASE STUDIES, plus FREE 20 hard hitting hours of some of my best content and then following up with more content that most people would charge $$$ membership for... So all I ask: Check out the no-cost course I am sending you below and the rest of the free content this week when you tell me where to send. an email will just be fine.. but If you want me to answer any questions, I find the Facebook private Mastermind group to be ideal. Everyone has questions, and I have found myself answering the same set of questions over and over! Heck! I gotta work too sometimes! And I said why not just put together everything you need to know that has been asked here>>>

I guarantee you will get countless AH-HA moments because this is the exact info I have used to grow my Express 10K Case study $$ businesses which you can check out here==>> if you want proof. Marketing/Sales Course. (This course gives you everything you need to start a business online and DRASTICALLY increase conversions) Do not complicate simple and easy things like many gurus try to. I want to know if this is what you would want to learn more about before I do anything. So I want your comments below if you want to learn more. Keep an eye on your inbox, I'll have some more 100% FREE Content for you! That's all for now! See ya, amigos! How To Use Pinterest To Drive Traffic To Your Blog How Do Bloggers Get Paid INTERSERVER WEB HOSTING INSTY WEB HOSTING How Do Bloggers Get Paid List Building – Are You Buying Email List Or Solo Ads? BLUEHOST WEB HOSTING How To Use Pinterest To Drive Traffic To Your Blog 10 Ways To Make Money Online – I Needed Money So I Had To Find Best Way To Make Money Online Start A Blog: How To Start A Blog, Beginners Guide to Successful WordPress Blogging In 90 days Vlogging Tools - Do You Really Need To Own The Best Vlogging Camera To Become A Vlogger? Read the full article

#howtocreateablog?

[ionica01]

Karma and Manami moving in together

I've wanted to write this for a while but I don't have the time, so these are my headcanons. It's the first time I post drafts like these, so I hope you have fun! -it was easy?! Because they used to spend time together anyway?! And they slept at each other's houses and had things in both places so it was actually more conviniant to move in together -slepping together was a challenge tho -Okuda would be shy at first, even though she's super casual around karma but sleeping in the same bed? I mean yeah, they've done *that* before but still -she tries to for Karma's sake and so she lays in bed and he's there behind her and his breath is hot against her neck... You know what, she can't! She cannot do this. -so she's about to get up when Karma's hand twistes around her waist and his head finds a confortable place on the nape of her neck and he mutters: "are you afraid?" In a very very VERY dangerous tone that sends shivers down Manami's spine. She gulps and nods slightly, which makes Karma let out a small chuckle and get his hands off hers, turning to the other side (did she imagine or did he whisper "sorry"?!) -she feels guilty so she clenches her fist around the hem of his pyjama and puts a hand on his back. She's too busy matching her breaths with his, which helps her calm down and finally fall asleep, so she can't sense Karma shiver nor see a small blush (what, no! Of course Karma wasn't blushing what are you saying pshh) -he makes breakfast; actually, he cooks in general. She's just a disaster in the kitchen ("it's just like preparing a potion, Manami!" "No it's not, Karma! Don't insult chemistry") -she helps set the table and washes the dishes in return (tho they mostly end up doing that together because it gives Karma an excuse to "accidentally" touch her hands) -they always eat dinner together and chit-chat about their respective days. Manami always laughs at Karma's antics and asks him if he's sure he didn't pour wasabi in his boss' food at lunch. He always grudgingly denies (the temptation on his face tells Maanmi his answer will change soon though) -whenever one of them comes home later, the other runs to welcome them home. If it's Karma who's late, Manami hugs Karma and he kisses her passionately; the other way around, Karma nonchalantly walks into the hallway and grabs her from behind while she's untying her shoes, catching her in a big warm hug. -they watch movies on Friday night. From Monday to Thursday, each of them has time to pick up a movie and they shortly present it to one another on Friday during dinner. After some short research on the internet, they vote on the one they want to watch. Both claim it's fair-play but they usually pick movies the other would want to watch, unless it's something they want really badly. If it's a tie and they aren't too tired, they end up watching both. -on Friday movie night, they build up a mini-fort in front of the TV: Karma's in charge of the snacks and Manami in charge of the fluffly blankets and pillows. She sets them up so it would ease Karma's neck ache (he denies having it, but she knows paper-work isn't pain-free). She's the one to cuddle in his arms during the movie, and he braids her hair absent-mindly -believe it or not, the chemist girl loves cute things. When they moved in, she brought over her pillows and cushions and plushies to the point where the sofa couldn't even be seen. No matter how much Karma loved her, he had to put an end to it and convince her that the chemistry books will no longer fit on the shelves if she keeps buying fluffy things. -manami has this habit of reading chemistry facts or stories about famous chemists when she's too stressed or tired, so there's always one of these books on her night table -karma passes by an awesome cake-shop on his way home and he always buys toffee and a piece of strawberry cake when he's stressed out. What he always forgets (or pretends to) is that his girlfriend can sense his emotions and usually buys the same from his favourite shop. -on weekends, Karma tends to laze off in bed as late as possible, claiming that's quality time with himself. Manami, on the other hand, gets up around eight and reads the newest science articles before starting her day and letting Karma have his peaceful slumbler -they go shopping together for groceries. Once a week, they go to a supermarket and get everything they need (being in charge of the kitchen, Karma makes the list). Manami's the one who always finds herself spending more time than necessarry in the cleaning supplies department, reading the contents of each cleaning spray and thinking of ways to maximize its potential or to avoid the unhealthy ones. -Karma, being the mischevious guy he is, always lies his lingering gaze on the chilli peppers; when Manami glances at him, he turns to her with a grin and she could swear she sees little horns growing out of his silky hair (of course they buy the peppers, and then Karma asks her to think of a way they can make them even spicier together). -half of the coffee table in the living room is filled with Manami's chemistry books and thick papers and sticky notes with ideas she suddenly got; the other half has a map of Japan with chess pieces on it: each morning, Karma checks the news and his mails and then moves the pieces accordingly ("the king here is me" he once explained pointing to Tokyo and the chess piece "and these are my servants. I secretly rule the country, though i can't move much."he smirked). When they relax after work, Manami inquires about the moved chess pieces and they strategize together for a bit, before Karma asks why certain sticky notes miss and Manami excitedly explains her new experiments -"take aim... And fire!" Manami exclaims as she starts throwing Christmas globes (made of plastic, of course) at Karma, who's trying to catch her with the Christmas lights. They've been decorating the tree for only three minutes before she decided it would be fun to have a little game for old time's sake. Of course they use everything they can as arsenal (unless it would hurt each other or wreck the house). Karma obviously has the advantage, but he lets Manami win... Or so she thinks, before he starts tickling her and she falls down beneath the tree laughing out loud -Manami is very ticklish and Karma uses that to his advantage whenever he can ("shouldn't you be nicer to your girlfriend?" "This just proves I respect you as an equal asassin") -karma mockingly adds -chan to the end of Manami's name and chants it whenever he wants her attention. Each time, she starts stroking his hair and massaging his head skin (she knows he starts purring but the first time she pointed that out, Karma snorted and shook her hand off: "I'm not a cat.") -Karma's a cat person. Like seriously, they were once at the mall and Karma suddenly stopped walking, staring at the window of the pet shop with a small blush. "Manami look, look! Isn't she cute?!" He said, excitedly pointing to the small cat. "Aww!" The girl exclaimed, kinda plainly. "Manami?" Karma snapped back and looked at his girlfriend, who averted her eyes. "Manami!" He squeezed her hand tighter. "Are you afraid of cats?" "No..." She denied unconvincindely. "You are!" He hugged her tight "I'm sorry I didn't notice before!" "N-no it's fine I mean... Karma... Karma would you let me go? It's embarrassing." "I'm sorry." "No it's fine, really." -karma's a bit clingy. Like once his walls fell down and he no longer needed to put up his guard around her, he could get affectionate and clingy around Manami. She kinda liked it, though: it felt like taming a wild animal. He's still possessive and really scary with the others, tho -people symphatize with Okuda telling her her boyfriend's scary and she's like "? Not at all?" And he's glaring besides her to the people accusing him of such a thing. Very convincing Karma! -despite christmas being his birthday and all, Karma was kinda meh about it until Manami started treating that as the most important day of the year and now he can't wait for it only to see what his girlfriend prepared for him -they often have Nagisa and the rest over, and it's like a big happy family: "nagisa, you're still short!" "Well hello to you too, Karma." "Say, don't people mistake you for a student?" "Karma, dear, how about we let Nagisa-kun make himself at home first?" -they don't really call each other names. Karma sometimes calls her "poison glasses" or "my chemist" and Manami sometimes goes for "dear" or "honey" but she gets embarrassed easily so no. To be continued😉

#karma akabane #okuda manami #karmanami #karma x okuda #manga couple #assassination classroom #ansatsu kyoushitsu #fanfiction #fanfic #drabble #mine #personal

[rokutouxei]

the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

ikemen vampire: temptation through the dark theo van gogh / mc | T | [ ao3 link in bio ]

The challenge seemed pretty simple: to try to befriend the university bookshop’s most sour employee, Theo van Gogh. As a literature major with a boatload of book recommendations on her back, it ought to be a simple task indeed. But as she uncovers what lies between Theo’s pages, the more she finds it harder to become closer to him without having to put the feeling directly into words. What can she learn from Theo about what it means to stay—and how can she teach Theo about what it means to let go? | written for ikevamp big bang 2020!

[ masterpost for all chapters ]

CHAPTER 5 OF 22

It’s not on purpose.

Theo isn’t intentionally testing her determination or anything of that sort. He just can’t wrap his head around her persistence.

He doesn’t purposefully make himself hard to contact to shrug her off. It’s just that he’s not as fond of social media as the next person. Sure, he does have accounts for the biggest names in the industry—Instagram, Facebook, the works—but he doesn’t use them regularly, or posts on them at all. The easiest and more surefire way to contact him, really, is through the usual, plain old messaging app on the phone, or maybe through a call.

(And he’s not so sure about giving her his number so suddenly.)

He doesn’t give the most roundabout answers to Arthur’s questions to keep her hanging. He just doesn’t want Arthur sticking his nose in business that isn’t his to begin with. He doesn’t find any reason to tell his coworker anything about their book exchange, even if—after Arthur’s admission—this entire friendship began with his orchestration.

He’s not doing it on purpose.

He knows how easily this could lead to understandable frustration. Maybe even the vague feeling that maybe he’s only attending their little book exchange sessions at the Grove because she gets Vincent to tell him. Maybe she won’t have the patience for him. Maybe she’ll just drop it.

But she doesn’t.

And that makes it even more confusing.

“Why are you taking this so seriously?” Theo asks one day, after they’ve handed the next week’s books to one another. He’s looking at her with a stern gaze, as if calculating every minuscule twitch on her face.

She only shrugs her shoulders and looks up at him innocently. “I’m having fun, aren’t you?”

As if the extra steps he’s making her take are not wasted time. As if she sees that she’s already slowly melting ice. It’s not that Theo is shunning her—but it’s safer like this, keeping her at a distance. Theo has his own priorities, and all arrows point to Vincent. The least he can do is make sure the books he lends are good; make sure he has the appropriate insight to bring with him. And she, in turn, sends every pass-the-message text (to Arthur, to Vincent), leaves all the notes in between lent and borrowed books, shows up to every meeting with that unbeatable smile on her face.

And in truth, Theo isn’t sure where this is going. Theo isn’t sure what she’s going to do to him, why they’re doing all this. But for now, he’ll just let her keep on doing this. For now.

They just both have a good feeling about it.

--

There is a certain art of choosing books to recommend to people. There is, of course, the matter of having a certain level of being well-read, as choosing from a hundred books allows more elbow room than choosing from ten.

But she knows better; there is more to it than just that.

If there’s one thing she is absolutely sure about the world, it’s that books—fiction, nonfiction, poetry, name it—all have the ability to bring people elsewhere. It’s magic she wishes she could have in real life. Sneak in between the pages and find yourself transported to an entirely separate timeline of the universe where these things happened. Slip a hand at the center-point and find yourself in a different world, where things are different.

Wouldn’t that be amazing?

But it’s not just about the bringing into, but also the bringing with—what do the books carry with them that will be useful to the reader? Which of its commendable qualities will match the receiver? Is it its storytelling, the way it weaves each character through their growth and journey? Is it the message, the core of it which it carries throughout the text through every plot point that happens? Is it the imagery, the space between the real and the imagined, where the infinite possibilities exist?

This is the tender part. This is the part that feels the most raw.

Romance has never been at the top of her priority list. She’s no newbie to it, but it’s just never been the most important thing in her life. It’s never been on the list at all. Getting into a relationship, the dating scene, being romantically attached to people—she understands the joy of it, she’s definitely dipped her toes into the water, but it isn’t what she wants right now.

She figures choosing books for people is the closest she can get to that feeling for now.

It’s not only Theo, of course—sometimes Arthur asks her for some recommendations too, and sometimes Dazai does, as well. To her it’s nothing more than a way of showing her affection, a little, “I had you in my thoughts,” as she matches a book to its recipient. It becomes more than just another title, not just another author.

She clutches the book Theo’s lent her for the week close to her chest as she crouches in front of her bookshelf to browse her own collection. She thinks, matching their theme to her heart: which book would best suit Theo’s needs? Which things might he benefit from hearing?

Pulls a book out from the shelf and wonders—which one would grace his life with a little bit of stardust?

--

That week, Theo asked her to “lend me the book you wish everyone would read at least once”—and when she answered with “no, that’s impossible, I can’t lend you 39 books at once?”—he clarified, “the one you’re still coming to terms with.” And that’s a really odd way to describe a book you’d want everyone else to read—Theo himself knew that—but somehow it made perfect sense to her, and the week later she hands him the small bound book.

She had passed onto him Neruda’s Twenty Love Poems and a Song of Despair.

An interesting choice, really, for that book to have fit under the said category, but Theo’s stopped trying to make sense of the surprises she brings up for him at this point. The book isn’t really lengthy—this particular volume is less than a hundred pages long, and it only took Theo a good hour to go through the contents, even while relishing every word of it. (She does the opposite, speed-running every book as fast as possible, because she “can’t be patient about what happens next”, a concept he cannot understand—“The book is not leaving, why don’t you enjoy what is written?” “I can’t wait! I need to know!”)

It’s not a complicated book.

But it sure has complicated feelings.

So he kind of understands why she had chosen that one.

Theo has a complicated relationship with love. Not that he’s had any sort of traumatizing past relationship or a lingering resentment for an ex, but there was just something about the concept of romance that doesn’t sit…right with him.

It’s not that he doesn’t know what it is, he does. There are books he loves—books he is very thankful for having found in this lifetime. There are food he loves, food that fills his stomach with warmth and makes his heart flutter and makes him feel like maybe world peace is achievable, and it’s in a spoonful of this creamy sugary pancake after all. And most importantly, he loves his brother very much; would like to see Vincent do great things in the future, or, if not that, then at least be happy, and live the life he wants to live—that’s what love is, isn’t it? To enjoy something wholly for what it is, and what it does to you. To want the best for a person.

His problem with love is he doesn’t know what to do with it.

In the same way that he still loves his parents even if they don’t understand why he’d go through such lengths for Vincent. In the same way that he still loves the people who’ve left him behind in the past, friends, old lovers, even when his heart was still pouring. And isn’t that what love is? To love something wholly for what it is, what it does to you, to forgive it of its mistakes and shortcomings?

Even when the cost is yours to bear?

What to do with a love that can live in his heart when the other no longer wants it?

Theo reads Neruda’s poetry book once. And then reads it again. And then reads some of his other books for good measure.

--

It’s pretty common to find Arthur walking around the campus with his hands in his pockets and the many eyes of adoring (or maybe loathing) girls on him—for all the understandable reasons. Today was a little different though, because he is outside the Arts Building in the late afternoon, reading some sort of a flyer.

“Arthur!”

He hastily keeps the flyer into his bag as she jogs up to him. “Hello, little miss. Nice to see you around.”

“What’re you doing here?” she asks, trying to peep into his bag.

Arthur, instead, pushes himself off the wall that he’d been leaning on, smoothly slipping his arm around hers. Months of friendship had gotten her used to him being touchy; she lets him. “Labor of love. Walk me back to the bookshop?”

She’s not surprised, but she asks anyway. “Are you on your shift?”

“It was an important errand to run, no need to be so incensed,” he says, half-laughing. “Let’s go back before your boyfriend has more than words for me.”

Pinching Arthur’s arm, she quips back: “He’s not my boyfriend.”

“Why, that’s exactly what he told me! You know you don’t need to keep it a secret from me.”

“You’re the absolute worst, Arthur.” The two of them fall into an even pace walking down the sidewalk. She relies on the silence to get them there, but there is something about the biting intrigue that snags her. “…What did Theo say?”

Arthur smirks. Openly. “Curious suddenly?”

“He doesn’t exactly talk to me about things like this,” she huffs. “It’s just books and literature with him.”

“That just means you haven’t cracked him.”

She pouts. “You’re not supposed to need to crack people.” She tugs at Arthur’s sleeve, insistent. “C’mon, tell me. He has to have told you something, right?”

Confidently, Arthur says, “Theo tells me everything.”

“I highly doubt that.”

“I suppose my information is subpar, then, so why should I—”

“Arthur!”

“Yes, yes, okay,” he says, finally relenting. “He won’t say it to your face, but he really enjoys spending time with you, little bird.”

Her face lights up like a little sun. “Really?”

“Oh, dear. Whatever will he feel, ratting him out like this—”

“Please, we all know you do not care because we are your source of entertainment,” she says, elbowing him. “…I was doubting it, honestly, but that’s a relief.”

“He never stops talking about your book club, actually.”

“No way.”

“Always masked in a complaint, but always about it all the time,” Arthur says, watching the smile grow on her face. “You’re a good influence on him, at least he’s not brooding away in a corner all day long. The customers have enjoyed his new, refreshed presence. All the lovely girls coming in now, what a joy.”

She squeezes his arm as they round the corner. “Why do I feel like this is going exactly according to your plan?” Arthur does not attempt denial. 

--

Theo does not stop asking for poetry books.

Only because he knows that even if she doesn’t voice it out loud, she’d want to lend him poetry books anyway. She, on the other hand, changes genres every week. Poetry, nonfiction, YA fiction, children’s fiction. She jumps from Ariel to A Little Life to The Girl Who drank the Moon to On Earth we Were Briefly Gorgeous. She has so much to say and so much to ask.

It’s just about driven Theo insane.

(It’s a good thing he enjoys her company.)

He won’t admit it, of course, but he shows up anyway. He frowns at every text she sends Vincent but he’s there. Every single Saturday. Reads every stray fast-food receipt note she slips in between the pages of the books she returns. Spends time on the books she lends him.

Ah, what did he get himself into?

Whatever.

Today, he’s brought with him Kerouac’s On the Road because she asked for a book that made him want to go away.

“Why am I not surprised that you brought me a Kerouac?” she asks while taking the book into her hands. She always holds them so gently. “His style is so interesting, though. Is it a shame to admit I’ve only read his poetry?”

“Only a little,” Theo says, but he’s joking because the corner of his lip is curled up ever so gently.

She flips the book to read the summary at the back. “Beat Generation, huh.”

“They wrote about liberation,” Theo says, sounding somehow defensive of his choice of a book. “Gritty and maybe even sloppy writing, but they wrote about freedom. Breaking the norm, finding yourself, facing the reality… doesn’t that fit your criteria of making one want to go away?”

She turns to him curiously. “Have you ever wanted to go away, Theo?”

He doesn’t turn to her. “I’m more the kind of person that stays.”

“Well, being a househusband isn’t bad work,” she comments, to which Theo snorts. “You know, I’ve really found that you have some sort of… classical, helpless romantic kind of aura on you.”

That makes him turn towards her. “What.”

“I mean, the books you’ve lent me—they all have some sort of romantic quality to them, you know? No matter how serious they get. I’m still recovering from A Little Life, you know.” She laughs. “Plus, all you’ve been asking me to lend you is poetry. Have you perhaps changed your mind about poetry?”

He narrows his eyes. “I don’t see how that makes me a romantic.” He sighs. “I didn’t think lowly of poetry, it just wasn’t my priority,” Theo clarifies. “We agreed to let the borrower decide the genre of the book but you’re so insistent on poetry that I’d rather take what you have instead of asking for something else. You’re pretty annoying when you’re insistent.”

She doesn’t deny the fact that she’s always saying about how she already has a poetry book to lend him every week. “I’m not annoying,” she says, pouting. “Geez, Theo, all you need to do is be honest and say you love poetry now and it’s because of me.”

“Is this a cause of yours? Getting people into poetry?”

But then, the banter stops. She falls silent for a moment that feels too long. Theo feels like he has to take back what he says, when, “Yes, something like that,” she says, softly. “They’re like love letters to the universe, I think they’re great.”

“That’s an interesting take.”

She frowns. “Do you not like love letters?”

Theo shrugs. “They’re classical.”

“That’s a non-answer,” she huffs. Holding her palm upward to the sky in a gesture, she says, “I just think they’re neat. It’s like a different experience in every book, every collection. You ever get a feeling that some poems find you, instead of the other way around? Like you were meant to find it at that exact moment?” Theo lightly shakes his head. “Really? Maybe you’ll experience it with some of the stuff I give you.”

He doesn’t know what’s hiding behind that serious expression, that other reason she’s so attached to poetry that she isn’t quite ready to say yet. He can feel it though. He doesn’t have the right to ask yet.

Instead, he raises his eyebrow and says, “You seem awfully confident.”

“I’m planning to make you read hundreds and hundreds of them, so it’s just a matter of numbers,” she says with a grin. “C’mon. Have any of the books I’ve given to you at least had a poem that resonated with you?”

And Theo pauses. Resonated, that’s a heavy word, it carries a lot with it. One could wish what they create would resonate with a lot of its consumers, whether that’s paintings or poetry or philosophies, but it’s not an exact art, and sometimes it’s all just a question of luck. Theo hesitantly shakes his head. “Not that I can think of,” he says. Thinks of the lines he’d copied out of the books to be remembered later. They were good lines, but hardly ones that resonated.

She hums, not sounding too put down by his answer. “Well, that just means we have to keep looking, right? I hope today’s at least gets some emotion in your face, Mister-Statue-Face-With-No-Feelings.”

“Hondje… What did you just call me?”

--

That day, he gives her his phone number.

--

She doesn’t know why everyone keeps asking her about it.

Sure, she had a crush on him, but it was really only entirely out of aesthetics. There was no denying he was hot, but he’s rather rough on the edges and has a rather sharp personality to be someone would want a boyfriend out of. Really, at this point, all she wants is to hang out with him and maybe reads some of the books he reads. Again—she doesn’t have space for distractions right now.

But everyone keeps asking her about it. Non-stop.

When she goes to the bookshop and Theo is at the back, Arthur comes up to her and asks her how The Friendship is going—as if it were something more special than just your regular old friendship. Most of the time she doesn’t know what to tell him, because somehow all he ever says to her after hearing about it is a small hmm like the answer didn’t quite fill in what he wanted to hear. Well, Arthur, sucks to be you, but you’re not hearing what you want to hear, she says to herself. Arthur’s a secret sucker for romance, the playboy that he is, and she’s not giving him a show.

But it’s not just Arthur. Vincent, too, asks her regularly. And considering she spends a good amount of time in the café he works at, the questions aren’t exactly that avoidable. She’ll order her drink and a pastry and Vincent will go, “is Theo being nice to you?” or any other variation of that sentence. (Somehow that feels like Vincent knows Theo is just mean in general, and that’s a kind of relief she doesn’t know how to explain. If his brother thinks he’s regularly mean, maybe that’s really just who he is, and also kind of forgivable.) Of course, she can’t exactly tell Vincent that Theo isn’t being nice to her, but oppositely, Theo isn’t really being mean to her either. He’s tolerating her every attempt to annoy him—or really, not annoy him, just hang out with him—and he hasn’t pushed her away exactly, so it must be going alright, right?

Of course, Dazai is curious as well, despite his earlier misgivings with Theo. (Dazai’s had bad experiences with business majors and romance in the past.) He’s not as persistent as Vincent and Arthur, but every chance he gets—say, an offhanded remark about a book or the bookshop, any little topic he feels he can reasonably steer towards the direction of Theo—he does ask. He asks in the way a friend would be curious of a new relationship—it is one, just not romantic, she insists—all full of worries for said friend. She appreciates this in many ways, because she knows Dazai can give her advice that will be very valuable to her. Still—the attention the thing pulls is kind of ridiculous, to her.

It doesn’t end with Dazai though, and at this point, it’s just going to be a long laundry list of people who are looking for gossip between her and Theo when—there really isn’t any. Despite being a literature major, she’s actually part of the campus’ local astronomy club, because why not? Stars are neat and she can’t quite catch up with the rest of the astrophysics majors that is actually with her, but the stargazing with the telescopes definitely makes it worth it. It’s just that Dazai is friends with their club head for a reason or another—a graduate student in astrophysics, Isaac Newton, and when Dazai knows there really isn’t any much harm, he runs his mouth, so—Isaac’s asked her at least once about Theo as well. Luckily Isaac is more on the awkward side—and they really aren’t that close quite yet, club aside—so he asks once, sees her reaction of despair and exhaustion, and never asks again.

She wonders if Theo gets the same barrage of questions as she does. From Arthur, for sure, but—Theo doesn’t exactly talk about other friends of his. Maybe they just haven’t gotten close enough for him to bring them up. Besides, whether or not people ask him about them or not, he’s sure that he already knows about the little crush—he’s just playing at it. Playing for what, she doesn’t know, and somehow, she’s fine with that.

That was all it was ever meant to be, anyway—a passing crush, a nice face, a sight for sore eyes, something to fall back on to refresh herself after long days of pushing her mind to the limit, working herself to exhaustion.

He was meant to be a breather, not a distraction.

To be friends is more than enough.

She screams into a pillow and grins.

#the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart #ikemen vampire #ikevamp theo

[dailyaudiobible]

01/07/2017 DAB Transcript

Genesis 16:1-18:15 ~ Matthew 6:1-24 ~ Psalm 7:1-17 ~ Proverbs 2:1-5

Today is the 7th day of January.  Welcome to the Daily Audio Bible.  I'm Brian and it's a pleasure to be here with you today. Congratulations.  This will complete our first week of the year as we settle into this rhythm that is our daily journey through the scriptures this year and 51 weeks from now, which may seem like a long time but it goes by so fast, we’ll be completing this journey, a revolution around the sun in more than one way.  

We’ve been reading from the New Living Translation this week and that is what we’ll do today.  We’ll switch to something else tomorrow.  For today, Genesis chapter 16, verse 1 through 18, verse 15.  

Commentary

In the life of Abram and Sarai a lot of stuff happens today.  They get a name change,  As God enters into this covenant with Abraham, he changes his name and that of his wife from Sarai to Sarah.  God, the Lord, will become known as the God of Abraham.  As these descendants that the Lord has promised come into the world, he’ll be known as the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, people that we haven’t gotten to meet yet but we will.  

It is an interesting story because God had promised Abram that his coming family would be vast and would have the land that he was in.  The promise was given, except there were no offspring, there were no kids, so it is hard to imagine that your descendants will have this land and will be a multitude of people including kings when you don’t have any kids.  So in Sarai's misery and also in this attempt to sort of force the promise since it wasn’t fast coming, Sarai came up with this plan to give her servant Hagar to Abram and have kids that way.  Of course, Abram was favorable to this idea, but once Hagar was pregnant, then it all became Abram's fault.   You can imagine the tensions in an arrangement like that, so Hagar had to flee.  But God was talking about Abram and Sarai, Abraham and Sarah.  

God came for a visit and this meal is prepared and this promise is given. “About this time next year I’ll be back and your wife Sarah will have a son.”  

Abraham and Sarah, neither one of them believed this was explicitly true. Sarah laughs in the tent.  Abraham says, “may you bless Ishmael.”  

And God clarifies.  “No, Sarah will have a son about this time next year.”

So here we are, the beginning of the year.  What about you?  What is it for you?  What are you carrying inside that has been a promise?  What might God be saying about this time next year for you that you have kind of laughed at or kind of looked for the alternative or found other ways to kind of reason it out?  

Or what have you been kind of carrying for a while and you’ve done a number of things to make it happen and it hasn’t worked out right?  It could be a dream.  It could be some goals.  It could be some health things.  It could be anything that you’ve been walking with and carrying around inside of you. It could be a baby that you’ve longed for that hasn’t come yet.  

The thing about dreams and goals, aspirations and desires and children for that matter is that it is always a process, always.  A couple doesn’t sit down and decide to have a baby.  I’ve been through this a few times in my life. You don���t just sit down and decide to have a baby.  You sit down and decide to do the requisite things that would bring about a child and that may not be instantaneous, but even once the child is conceived, there is a process involved in all of this.  We don’t decide to have a baby.  The baby decides when to be had.  But we certainly had to participate and collaborate in making that happen and be involved in the process of the whole.  

And that is all necessary.  Because when a baby comes or when you finally achieve or reach that thing, that dream, that God-given word, that has to incubate.  That has to grow. That has to move into our lives rather than being dumped on our heads.  Because when God gives a dream, well then we have to expand to be able to steward what he's inviting us into.  And that is going to take some time, love, and tenderness.  I know, that's my Michael Bolton reference for the day. Actually, I don’t think I’ve referenced Michael Bolton ever on the Daily Audio Bible, so welcome to a first.  

Nevertheless, it is going to take the time for our hearts, our minds, our bodies, our wills to align themselves with exactly what it is God is saying. Abraham and Sarah, they were looking for this to be fulfilled some other way because they couldn’t imagine that it could be filled the way God was actually saying.  God's response to that for Abraham and Sarah was simply this: Is anything too hard for the Lord? That is a big question.  I know that the right answer is ‘of course not. God can do anything.’  Do we actually believe that nothing is impossible with God, though?  Seriously? Probably if we’re being really honest about this, our knee jerk reaction to a question like ‘is anything too hard for the Lord?’ is ‘of course not,’ but the truth would be somewhere back from that. It would be something like ‘of course not, God can do whatever he wants.  He is sovereign.  He is the Lord.  He is all powerful, but maybe not for me.’  Right?

We get restless in the waiting.  We want the baby without all of the expansion necessary to steward that thing that God has placed in our hearts.  Maybe we’ve had this kind of Hagar situation where we tried to bring things about that haven’t worked out right and so the dream has gotten faded and we’ve started thinking ‘I didn’t really hear this.’  And ‘this isn’t really true.’  ‘Something has changed.  God has changed his mind.’  ‘This has been withdrawn.’  ‘I’ve screwed up.’  And we just talk ourselves right out of all of this.  But there is a space of time that we have to carry this thing.  There is a margin of time that we have to expand into.  

This is all over the Bible.  There is this huge promise for this guy named Abram that somehow he, a desert dweller, a Bedouin who is from good fortune and has a good reputation but isn’t exactly king material, it's not like he is a royal line here, is going to have so many offspring that they are going to be like the sands on the seashore.  This promise is going to take centuries before it is fulfilled.  Believe it or not, we are participating right now in the future.  How we handle our lives, how we steward what we have now is actually going to affect our grandchildren and great grandchildren and generations that we will never get to know but will exist on this planet because of what we do today and now.

So what about you?  About this time next year?  Invite the Holy Spirit into that.  

Then in the New Testament, we’re going through Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount. We come to this incredibly famous portion of scripture known as The Lord's Prayer.  Probably most of you could recite that portion of scripture. Jesus is showing his disciples a posture of heart from which to communicate and collaborate with God.  He sets that all up by saying don’t do it like you’ve seen it done where it is done for show but it's not real.  If you’re going to really, really try to commune with God, then that is between you and him.  This is an intimate collaboration, an intimate communication. This is not for show.  This is between you and God.

And then he shows them this posture of heart through The Lord's Prayer. It's what he says immediately after The Lord's Prayer that is very important.  So let's do this.  Say this with me.  

Our Father, who art in heaven,hallowed be thy name. Thy Kingdom come. Thy will be done on earth, as it is in heaven.  Give us this day our daily bread. Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.  And lead us not into temptation,but deliver us from the evil one.  For thine is the Kingdom, the power, the glory forever. Amen.

We can all say this.  What we just said is forgive us of our trespasses, our sins, as we forgive those who trespass against us.  And Jesus expands that.  If you forgive those who sin against you, your Heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.  

I can’t expand on that because it is very direct and clear.  What it should do, though, is disrupt us on a number of levels.  Forgiveness is not optional in the faith journey.  It is necessary and required in the faith journey. I realize that can touch some very, very soft and tender places inside of us where we’re like ‘I am not ready for that’ or ‘I cannot do that right now.’  It's kind of one of these little subtle places where we can get a bit judgmental toward God because we can easily see the command that we have to release, that we have to forgive while also knowing just how deep that pain and injury was and we can look at God and go ‘you just don’t really understand what we’re talking about here.’  The irony is that he does.  This Jesus who is speaking these exact words modeled this.  

So we haven’t gotten to the first passion narrative, the last days of Jesus’ life, but I'm pretty sure most of you know this. He was nailed to a cross.  He was crucified.  And what did he say?  “Father, forgive them.”  He said to forgive the people who were in the process at the moment of killing him.  He said forgive them for this.  Okay, so he does know what he is talking about and has modeled and lived it.  

This year the word that we’re kind of exploring, this margin, is sort of like the space between where we are and the edge, the edge of anything.  The space between us and collapse in some sort of way, whether that is a relationship, whether that is a job, whether that is a dream or goal.  It doesn’t matter.  The space between where we are and the edge.  The truth is we live far closer to the edge than we should because there is no margin.  One wrong step sends us over the edge to plummet.  

Jesus saying what he said about forgiveness is not just a command.  It is a gift because it gives us margin in our lives.  We are not carrying things that are poison next to our soul anymore. When we forgive, that's not that we forget the things that have happened.  It is that we release the person or the incident or whatever, we release it to God because frankly it is too hot to handle.  It is burning us down.  It is bringing us toward the edge and that is not shalom.  That is not the order and peace and wholeness of God in our lives in all facets.  Forgiveness may be a difficult act but it is a huge step toward freedom and spaciousness and shalom.

So there is plenty here on the last day of the first week of the new year for us to consider.  Maybe we’ve considered it before, but maybe now it is time to do something about it and finally rid ourselves of the things that we don’t need in our lives anymore and forgiveness is one of those ways.  

Prayer

Father, you haven’t asked us to do something just because it is hard or just because you want to mess with us.  Everything that you do is aimed toward our redemption.  This whole story that we’ve just begun of taking this journey through the Bible this year is going to reveal nothing but that – that you redeem what you touch and you always redeem.  So we invite you into all of this, these dreams that we are carrying around, these things that we’ve kind of laughed off or tried to make happen other ways, these offenses and sins against us that we keep holding onto as if we can be the judge in the situation, we release all of this to you, all of it, all of it.  We invite your Holy Spirit to continue to bring up places in us that maybe we’ve even forgotten about that we’re holding onto.  We need to rid ourselves of these things and release them to you. So come, Holy Spirit.  We ask in Jesus’ name.  Amen.  

Announcements

Www.DailyAudioBible.com is the website.  It's where you find out what is going on around here, so be sure to check that out.  We’ve kind of gone through all the Daily Audio Bible 101 stuff this week, so I think we’re all on the same page about how to do what.  We can buckle in and settle in for the journey of a lifetime through the Bible this year.  But www.DailyAudioBible.com, the website is kind of the hub.  It is where you find out what is going on, so be sure to check it out and see what people are praying about and maybe even send words of encouragement that way.  

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible, you can also do that at www.DailyAudioBible.com.  There is a link on the home page.  And thank you. The Daily Audio Bible is a community and what we do, we do as a community and when we all do a little bit, then we have this community.  So thank you for your partnership.  So the link is on the home page.  If you use the app, you can push the More button in the lower right-hand corner.  Or the mailing address is P.O. Box 1996, Spring Hill, TN 37174.

And, as always, if you have a prayer request or comment, [phone] is the number to dial.  

And that is it for today.  I'm Brian. Well done on the first week.  I’ll be waiting for you here tomorrow.  

Community Prayer Requests and Praise Reports

Hi Dabbers.  This is Jack from Sac.  Every New Year's when we make our resolutions, reading the entire Bible is often on the list and we get busy, much too busy and the simple thing becomes harder and harder.  When we think about it, we begin to feel guilty and decide not to think about it and we don’t, until the year turns one more time.  We fall into two patterns.  The easy pattern:  We make it harder than it has to be followed by losing interest in it followed by convincing ourselves it doesn’t need doing.  The first step in the insight easy is often good and it is for a higher value to know God through his word.  The second pattern is the hard pattern.  Most people who don’t listen to the DAB don’t because they don’t like to listen to the Bible and the truth is there are things that are good for us that we just don’t like doing.  If we liked it, we would do it.  So there are two conclusions I would like to make.  First, don’t make it hard.  It's easy. And second, set your goal to always do today's DAB, not the entire Bible.  Don’t ever say I'm behind.  Do today's DAB and let yesterday and tomorrow be.  Yes, it is noble to want to do the DAB every day, 365 days and no, you have not failed if you don’t.  if you miss a day, you’re not behind.  You are on today's DAB just where God wants you.  I love you guys.  And stay on today's DAB.  This is Jack from Sac.  Take care.

Hey DAB community.  It's Cory up in Southeast Saskatchewan.  Here it is December 31st, last day of the year and I'm finally caught up.  I started late…well, in about March this year and I was trying to go back from the start, and so just being caught up and live, it's kind of exciting for me.  It's a big deal for me.  So I'm looking forward to that and being in step with everybody now.  As I'm thinking here about 2017 and the word margin and how that looks in my life, I don’t want to forget about 2016 and healthy.  Man, Brian, the word healthy is very appropriate in my life.  I'm a guy that has suffered from severe depression.  I was probably close to 400 pounds a couple times in my life.  I’ve had chronic weight swings.  I’ve had suicidal thoughts in my life.  I’ve been in dark places and right now my life is so, so much better.  So just unpacking the Bible and figuring out how that looks in my life.  I just turned 40 years old yesterday on the 30th of December and so it's kind of a big deal in a guy's life.  I've given a lot of thought to the word healthy in the past year and I'm trying to make that stick.  So even as we look forward to margin, I want to make sure that the discipline and everything that goes into being healthy stays and hopefully takes root in my life going forward here.  I appreciate those themes and I'm trying to work them into my life.  Yeah, I appreciate all you guys as well. Looking forward to 2017. Thanks guys. Bye.  

Hi everyone.  Happy New Year.  This is Dawn from New York calling to say Happy New Year to my beautiful sisters and brothers around the world and welcome, welcome to the new listeners. We’re all so happy you decided to join us this year.  Yay! Welcome.  You made a great decision to join the Daily Audio Bible community.  It is great to listen to scripture together every day and there will be lots of other precious, fun, joyful surprises along the year as you stick with it and listen to the prayer requests and the other special events that happen through the year. Such a blessing.  So, so happy you're joining us.  Welcome, welcome new listeners.  I want to thank everybody who stood together to pray for the word healthy in our lives this year.  It took about five months for me to take some action steps to really have that percolate through my life this past year, but thank God I'm ending the year healthier than I began and I'm really looking forward to margin.  That was wonderful to hear that word for this year.  Thank you so much.  Anyway, I just wish everyone a beautiful new year.  Yes, it is spiritual nutrition for us.  I loved the Family Christmas program.  Thank you, everybody who called in.  And the one sister at the end who said that we take our vitamins D, A, B every day, oh, that was great!  I loved it. It is so true.  So its spiritual nutrition, good for our souls.  His mercies are new every morning.  Great is his faithfulness.  God bless you all.  God bless all of us in this new year and may we be encouraged by God and hope and encourage one another.  God bless you all.  Happy New Year!  

I recently got a visit from an old friend who has just been released from jail.  He said he wanted to walk in the newness of life, but he had a mindset predestined to fail. He was shocked when he saw that I was now blind, but he was even more shocked when he saw that I really didn’t mind. And then when I told him that I also now have cancer, he was so stunned with unbelief that he couldn’t even answer.  I told him that I had taken my old ways and my old life humbly before God and asked him if he would be willing to forgive. And God gave me such a powerful reassurance of his love that I now have a profound contentment  while I live.   Profound contentment, powerful peace, joy and blessings that continually increase. A life built on giving and service to others.  A life in which all men of all races can live life as brothers.  The more that I give, the more I receive.  The more I read God's word, the more I believe.  And those of you who know me, know I don’t need any validation. My resume has been written across this whole entire nation and if God can change me, he can definitely change you. In fact, God is the only one I know who has the power to make a life new.  I guess the question is do you really want change?  Do you really want new?  Or are you just looking for some new way to make it do what it do?  I'm going to tell you, just like I told my friend too. If God can change me, he can most definitely change you too.  [email protected].  Happy New Year, everybody.  I’d like to give a shout-out to Delta Alpha Foxtrot, haven’t heard from you in a while, Brother.  Hope you're still hanging in there.  Yeah, David F.  And Michelle, it was nice hearing from you.  Haven’t heard your voice in a while.  Anyway, as usual…

Happy New Year everybody.  This is Alicia from Kansas.  I called to say welcome to all the new listeners who have just found the Daily Audio Bible.  You have found a wonderful, wonderful family of believers who will listen to your prayers. They will pray with you, pray for you. I encourage you to check out the website.  I encourage you to check out the Facebook page and the Prayer Wall.  It is hard sometimes.  I get very uncomfortable calling in, but if you have a prayer need, please call. Please let us know.  Please share with us.  Do not be frightened.  Do not let pride or fear or shame stand in the way.  To everybody else who has been listening for the past 11 years, as we go into our 12th year, which is a fantastic number, I just say to everybody shalom.  Thank you. Have a blessed year and great day. Bye-bye.  

Hello family.  Today is January 1st and I'm on my way to find my daughter who is raging. She suffers from borderline personality disorder and she is threatening to kill herself and I know that this will be played long after my crisis is over, but God knows what I need and he knows reaching out is the most important thing I could do.  So I just ask, please, that you would help give me the strength to show tough love and please just cover my daughter, Raegan, in your prayers and ask God to come for her because I know that is the only thing that is going to heal her. Thank you, family.  I love you.  In Jesus’ name.  Amen.