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ravenbrenna09 · 4 years

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Safe - Chapter Four

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Guys, we made it!

I tried to get this chapter up like an hour earlier, but that didn't end up working out for me. But, this time around, my author's note will be a little more coherent than it was originally. But, I just wanted to thank everyone's continuous support, not only with Safe but also with Unattainable! These two stories have meant the absolute world to me and all of your continued support is something that I will forever hold near and dear to my heart.

That being said, I hope you guys enjoy the final chapter of Safe and the final look into Sander's complicated mind.

Note: I tried to keep the 'hotel' scene as close to what I felt Willem DS portrayed in the original clip. I hope that I managed to do his incredible acting some smidge of justice!

...

bold = sending, italicized = receiving

...

Jens thinks you’re hot.

By the way.

Jens is the one with the black hair, right?

Dating Lucas VDH?

Yes?

Do I want to know how you know that?

Tell him he’s hot too.

But, he’s nothing compared to you 😉

Do I want to know how you know that?

Sander smirked, leaning against the pillar of the train station, waiting for Camille. Despite having been wrapped in Robbe’s embrace for the majority of the afternoon, lazy kisses becoming heated and passionate only to turn back around, switching back and forth as easy as breathing, Sander already desperately missed his skater boy, clinging to him like a koala, two arms wound around his shoulders and two legs locked around his waist. He wanted nothing more than to go back to Robbe’s apartment, snuggle into his warmth and ignore Noor’s amused giggles.

But, there were multiple ways that he knew that. The skate park when Robbe didn’t know he was there before he had called things off, the club where he saw him dancing with Lucas, stalking Robbe’s Instagram to drink in all the sight of Robbe because that was all he thought that he had, and the vlogs had Robbe had been tagged in, that made him laugh and feel a little bit better and a little worse.

Um. Might’ve seen some videos of his on Instagram.

Sander.

You did not watch those stupid vlogs.

Yes, I definitely did.

You were absolutely adorable.

Noor could probably give you some lessons about makeup.

As if I couldn’t die of embarrassment any further.

I thought you were absolutely adorable.

You always think I’m adorable.

Not true.

Oh, really?

Yeah, should’ve seen you last night.

I would not describe that as adorable.

Oh, what would you describe it as?

I think you already know.

Leaning back against the pillar, grinning silently to himself, biting down on his lip to keep himself from breaking apart in a puddle of happiness on the floor. Robbe was with him again, kissing him and loving him and sending him flirty text messages and wanting to be with him. Sander felt like he was walking on air, like if someone were to pinch him it wouldn’t be true, but all he had to do was look at his text messages and be reminded, oh right.

Who are you meeting?

I’m picking up my sister.

Okay, I won’t do it then.

Sander blinked, typing out a message.

Do what?

“Saaaaaaaaander!”

Sander whipped up, spotting his sister moving towards him, her purple duffle bag over his shoulder, and shoved his phone in his pocket. She rushed towards him, her brown hair whipping around her, and she dropped her bag on the floor before launching herself at Sander. He clung to his sister tightly, burying his head into her shoulder, and Camille returned his hug with as much as strength as she could.

“I’ve missed you so much,” Sander breathed out.

“I missed you too,” Camille grinned, leaning back to beam up at him. “How’s the new apartment? Did you meet any neighbors?”

“No,” Sander replied. “But, I met up with some old friends.”

“Really?” Camille spoke, beaming. “Senne?”

Sander smiled. “Among him, yeah!”

“Good, I can’t wait to hear all about it!” Camille replied, turning to pick up her duffle bag. Sander stood up from the pillar as she slung it over her body. “Now, you can tell me about meeting up with your friends, but no relationship stuff, okay? I’m just not in the right headspace for it.”

Sander turned towards her. “Did something happen?”

“No, not really,” Camille replied, turning towards him, a sad smile on her face, reaching all the way to her eyes. “Just realized how lonely I was, you know. I had a lot of fun on my trip to Berlin with all my friends. But, most of them are all in committed relationships right now and… I’m not, you know?” She shrugged her shoulders. “I know I’m waiting for the right person to come into my life, but we met this chef, named Matteo, and his boyfriend, David, and I don’t know I guess I just got hit with the feels you know?”

Sander smiled. “I get that.”

“So, anyway, no relationship stuff, got it?” Camille spoke up.

“Got it,” Sander affirmed, feeling his phone buzz in his pocket.

“I really have to pee then I’ll be right back!” Camille continued, hurriedly, before running off again in the direction of the bathroom up ahead. Sander shook his head, laughing lightly as he pulled out his phone to see what Robbe had responded. He had sent two messages.

This.

Robbe IJzermans sent an image.

Sander’s eyes went wide, staring down at the photo on his screen. It wasn’t a completely naked photo, but Robbe was shirtless. The angle of the photo capturing more of his chest than his face. There were numerous purple bruises that Sander had made the previous night. Sander was almost, almost, ashamed of the pure want that coursed through him. Even though Sander had an overdose of Robbe all afternoon, wrapped in each other’s embrace and kisses and pure want, the artist suddenly found himself desperate for another fix.

His phone buzzed in his hand and Sander quickly saved the picture before he moved to the new message that Robbe had sent.

Want me to come over after your sister leaves?

Fuck, Robbe.

I gotta survive until then.

Camille came out of the bathroom and Sander stared down at his phone, imagining the giggle that Robbe was probably doing, the thrilled look in his eyes at the effect that Robbe had on him. Camille sent him an inquisitive look, probably seeing the conflict on Sander’s face, but Sander grinned at her, knowing that he would probably text Robbe as soon as Camille headed back to her own apartment. As the two of them headed to leave the station, Sander quickly sent Robbe a text.

I’ll text you when my sister leaves.

I’ll be ready 😉

You better be.

...

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#safe: an unattainable spin-off #safe: sander’s pov #sander driesen #wtfock #wtfam #sander's pov of unattainable #robbe ijzermans #brenna writes #safe fic #unattainable fic spin off #the final chapter #we made it guys #sobbe fic #rosander fic #sobbe #rosander #wtfock fic #now to sit back and be nervous

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emy-loves-you · 4 years

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Sanders Sides AU-gust Day 3: Soulmates

Your shadow is the current silhouette of your soulmate. Only you and your soulmate can see your shadow. Shadows of animals and objects (non-humans basically) can be seen by everyone. Most people have human soulmates that grow up with a human shadow. Logan is not most people.

Logan POV, Intrulogical, Prinxiety and Moceit

Day 2 | Masterlist | Day 4

Logan was smart.

At just four years old, Logan could count to one thousand, tie his shoes, and knew how to read books meant for kids twice his age. Logan knew other things too. He knew that the earth moved around the sun, not the other way around. He knew that Mrs. Smith didn’t like Mr. Smith and that they were getting a ‘dee-vorce.’ He knew that rainbows were like giant water mirrors. And he knew what soulmates are.

Soulmates mean different things to different people. They appear as shadows, but your shadow is actually your soulmate’s shadow. Logan didn’t really understand how that worked, but he didn’t ask about it. Mama’s shadow disappeared when she was little, and she doesn’t like to talk about it. Logan didn’t understand why Papa married Mama if they weren’t soulmates, but he didn’t ask. Because Logan was smart, and he knew that if he asked about their soulmates, they would ask about his. And while Logan didn’t know a lot about soulmates, he knew that his shadow was different.

Logan’s soulmate was big. Bigger than Mama and Papa. Sometimes Logan would lay in bed and his soulmate’s shadow covered him like a blanket. It made him feel safe and protected. One time Logan was almost hurt by a big doggie, but the dog saw Logan’s shadow and ran away. Logan knew that big shadows weren’t good. He heard about how Susie from down the street had a ‘peddle-file’ for a soulmate. But Logan knew that his soulmate wouldn’t hurt him.

Sometimes the shadow would change into something smaller, closer to Papa’s height. Sometimes the shadow grew so big that Logan couldn’t see the end of it. But most of the time, Logan’s shadow stayed the same size and shape. Logan knew it wasn’t normal to have a soulmate that changed shape. He knew it wasn’t normal for his shadow to have long, spindly arms with pointed fingers. He knew that most shadows didn’t have long devil horns, or give off an aura that scared all animals and most humans away. Logan knew that Mama and Papa wouldn’t understand if he told them.

Because Logan was smart enough to know that his soulmate wasn’t human.

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Logan was brave.

Most people wouldn’t see that at first glance. Logan was a 17-year-old nerd. He was such an oddball that even bullies steered clear of him (Logan never commented on that. He knew it was his soulmate’s aura scaring them away. Which was interesting since human shadows don’t have detectable auras). Logan always had his nose in a book. Most people expected him to be a teacher’s pet, but Logan never answered questions. He never reached out to others, and he never spoke unless he was spoken to, so most people didn’t know how brave Logan actually was.

Even those who considered themselves close to Logan didn’t see him as brave. In fact, most people saw him as emotionless. He rarely smiled or spoke out of turn. He was the perfect child in terms of behavior and intelligence, but he never showed signs of actually enjoying the world around him.

But there was something that Logan enjoyed: his shadow. While it was disappointing to have no one to talk to about his soulmate, Logan wouldn’t give his soulmate up for anything. It was fascinating to watch, and every time Logan interacted with his shadow he felt safe and loved. Most people would scream if their shadow’s jaw unhinged to impossible lengths, most likely to swallow something whole. Logan watched with rapt attention, itching to write it down. He never recorded anything about his soulmate, paranoid that someone would find it. Instead, he attempted to memorize every new detail on his soulmate. His soulmate was 8 feet tall exactly, with an extra four inches added for the horns. While his largest form was immeasurable, his smallest form stood at 6 ft 6 in with no horns to see. Logan assumed that this form was meant to mimic a human, though he had no other data to support that hypothesis. Logan’s soulmate was also extremely fast, occasionally moving its limbs at a speed that Logan couldn’t track with his eyes.

Logan participated in activities that made sense to him yet baffled others. He spent hours holed up in his room, his shadow comforting him as he read a book. He ran for an hour every afternoon, though he had no interest in joining any races. He also went to the gym every other day. Logan’s logic behind this was that he needed to be quick and strong in case his soulmate meant him harm (this was a lie and Logan knew it. Not only did Logan still believe that his soulmate wouldn’t harm him, he also doubted that he could physically run away from a creature that could potentially travel at inhuman speeds, much less fight one. The truth was that Logan wanted to have something vaguely in common with his soulmate). While Logan liked to read philosophy and chemistry books, he could also be seen reading books on soulmates, fairytales and cryptids. While Logan did not believe that humanity was aware that Logan’s soulmate existed, he hoped he would one day find something that would even slightly match his predicament.

Logan was actually reading another book about soulmates as he sat under the apple tree outside of the library. The tree’s shadow loomed over him, but Logan could still easily see his soulmate’s silhouette. He wasn’t sure if that was a soulmate-thing or a my-soulmate-isn’t-human-thing. That’s actually why he was reading this book: Everyday Occurrences for Soulmates. It was mainly a description of how soulmate customs were treated around the world, but Logan hoped that it would give him more insight into how human shadows should look and behave.

“Get back here, freak!” Logan’s head snapped up to see another teen run past him. Logan vaguely recognized the patchwork hoodie from his biology class. Virgil Storm, Logan’s memory supplied. Emo and social outcast. Logan watched as another group of teens chased after him. Virgil continued to run until he tripped and fell. Logan stood up as the gaggle of teenagers approached Virgil. This won’t do at all.

“What do you think you’re doing?” The teens looked afraid for a moment before they turned and saw Logan approaching.

The one in the middle laughed. “Run along, nerd, before you end up like this freak!” Micheal Scott, if Logan’s memory was correct (it always was). Senior, quarterback, was held back three times.

Logan continued to step forward, ignoring the way his shadow lashed around his ankles. “Virgil has done nothing to warrant your ire, Micheal.” This was true; Virgil talked less than even Logan did. Other than being exceptionally talented in art, Virgil was essentially a nobody (and while Logan knew that looks could be deceiving, he- like everyone else- saw reason to interact with Virgil).

Micheal scoffed. “Of course he does! He’s a freak and he deserves to be put in his place-”

Now, Logan was very smart. He knew that acting violently would most likely result in negative consequences. But Logan also knew that Virgil didn’t deserve Micheal’s… anything, Micheal’s an asshole. But either way, Logan knew what it was like to be the odd-one-out. And while Logan was nervous of the consequences, when he heard Micheal call Virgila freak, Logan’s bravery shined through.

Logan was satisfied to feel Micheal’s nose break from under his fist. Those visits to the gym were actually useful. Huh. Logan watched impassively as Micheal fell down to his knees. Logan kneeled so that his face loomed just above Micheal’s. Micheal started shivering, and Logan couldn’t tell if it was him or his shadow that was causing him distress. He also didn’t care. “If you even look at me or Virgil the wrong way I will not hesitate to make your life a living hell. Understood?” Logan’s voice remained cold and emotionless. While his surge in confidence was making him slightly uncomfortable, it produced the intended outcome. Micheal blanched before scurrying away. It took only a look to get the other teens to do the same.

Logan knelt down next to the now safe teen. “Are you alright?” He held out his hand for Virgil to grab.

Virgil stared at the hand in shock, seemingly surprised that someone had stood up for him. “Yeah, thanks.” He took the offered hand, pulling himself up onto his feet. His sketchbook fell out of his hand, which Logan didn’t realize was even there. Logan bent down to grab the sketchbook for Virgil when he froze.

The sketch was of some kind of fae/eldritch horror combination. The creature’s face was youthful, appearing to be a man in his early twenties. Its arms were long and spindly, and his nails were sharpened to a point. It wore a white prince suit with a red sash. But what really grabbed Logan’s attention was the pair of devil horns that sat on top of its head.

Logan looked up at Virgil, who was suddenly pale and shaking. “Virgil, what was your inspiration behind this piece?”

Virgil grabbed the notebook and shook his head. “It’s nothing, just a nightmare I had. Nothing more.” He went to walk away.

Logan grabbed Virgil by the hoodie sleeve. “Please do not lie to me.” Virgil stared at Logan in horror. Logan stood there, feeling his desperation claw at him. “Please,” He whispered. “Please tell me I’m not alone.”

Because Logan was brave, and he didn’t want to be alone anymore.

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Logan was observant.

While his observations didn’t help him in finding his soulmate, it did help him take care of his two new (and only) friends.

Virgil Storm apparently had a soulmate similar to Logan’s, as did Virgil’s best friend Patton Heart. Virgil also had a nightbond, a rare form of soulbond that allowed soulmates to visit each other in their dreams. Apparently, the creatures did not have a name for their species. Roman, Virgil’s soulmate, appeared to have very little knowledge on his species. While this did disappoint Logan, he was still grateful to have someone to share his findings with. After knowing each other for over a year, the trio were never seen apart, finally having friends who weren’t scared away by their shadow’s dark auras.

Virgil and Patton both had similar opinions to Logan on their inhuman soulmates, mainly that it was more fascinating than terrifying. Virgil was interested in the darker aspects of their soulmates, while Patton was just happy that he had a soulmate. Logan grew to care for the two teens. While Virgil was quiet and awkward around others, Logan learned that he was actually very snarky and cynical. Patton pretended that life was perfect, but Logan had seen enough to know that Patton only genuinely smiled when thinking about his soulmate. Logan had become quite protective of the two, as his shadow tended to scare off more potential threats than Virgil’s or Patton’s did.

Logan was currently running around the perimeter of the highschool as he waited for his friends to finish their activities. He had asked if they would like to join him, but Patton was asthematic and Virgil detested running. So, it had become a common occurrence for Logan to do his running while Patton and Virgil participated in their after school clubs.

Logan allowed his mind to wander as he completed another lap. He was disappointed that he’s so far unsuccessful in terms of meeting his soulmate. None of them had met their soulmates in person, even Virgil. According to Roman, the creatures had a much deeper connection to their souls compared to humans. He had also said that the creatures wouldn’t be found by their soulmates until “our loves are ready.” Ready for what, Logan didn’t know. But that didn’t stop him from exhausting every possible way to find his soulmate.

Logan saw a flash of yellow and almost tripped over his feet. Not stopping as to draw suspicion, he glanced towards the forest behind the school and saw something… odd.

Standing at the edge of the treeline was a man. He was tall and young, probably in his mid 20s. He wore an impeccable black suit with yellow accessories, which was odd since he appeared to have came from the forest. Logan followed his gaze and just as the gym doors opened. Patton sprinted out of the school, most likely grabbing something from his car. Logan watched as the man’s gaze followed Patton as he walked towards his car. Logan tsked as he darted into the treeline, attempting to not be spotted. The man was stalking Patton, and that was not acceptable. But Logan was observant, so he’d learn more about the man before making his move.

Logan had just reached where he’d last seen the man when he noticed something important: his shadow wasn’t moving. Any time Logan was heading towards potential danger, his shadow would move erratically around his feet, as if it was trying to stop him. Any time potential danger was heading towards him, Logan’s shadow would lash towards the danger, it’s natural aura deterring most creatures. But his shadow wasn’t moving. It was calm. Complacent.

Logan was so busy analyzing his shadow that he almost hadn’t realized that the man wasn’t there. Logan felt a chill go down his neck and he spun around, to find himself less than a foot away from the man. Logan stifled the urge to scream. His shadow wasn’t acting up, and Logan trusted his soulmate to protect him. But now that he was almost touching the man, Logan quickly realized something. How his smile was a hair too wide. How just standing close to him made Logan’s fight-or-flight reflexes go haywire.

Logan was observant, but it didn’t take much to realize that this man isn’t human.

Logan cleared his throat as he forced himself to articulate a response. “Hello. Might I ask why you’re trespassing into a high school to observe minors?”

The man looked guilty (bullshit) as he spoke. “I’m sorry, I don’t believe we’ve met before.” He held out his hand, presumably for Logan to shake. “My name is Declan Brown. I was sent by the school board to observe the school’s management of extracurricular activities-”

“Stop.” Logan suddenly said, resisting the urge to physically shake his head. A part of him was already nodding along to what he said. It’s a perfectly reasonable assumption- Logan did his best to shove the thought away. The creature obviously had a talent in mental manipulation.

The (not)man gaped for a second. “Excuse me?” He seemed shocked. The thoughts became more intense and repetitive.

Logan started rambling, less focused on his words and more focused on getting Declan’s (that’s probably not his name) manipulations out of his head. “Stop lying to me. No member of the student board would support stalking a minor from the school’s perimeter. Check up on your human facts before stating such a bold lie. And will you shut up with the thoughts!” Before Logan could acknowledge what he had said, the thoughts ceased completely.

The creature looked at Logan with unguarded curiosity. “Who are you?”

Logan crossed his arms as he ignored how terrified he felt. “My name is unimportant for this conversation. Now I’ll ask again: Why are you stalking my friend?”

Logan’s shadow chose that moment to respond, shifting forward so it brushed against the creature’s ankles. Logan then realized that not only did he seem to acknowledge Logan’s shadow, he also didn’t have a shadow. Which means that he has a soulmate. The creature stared at the shadow before laughing. “Ah. That makes much more sense.”

Logan frowned. “Please answer my question.”

The creature’s smile seemed more genuine as he held out his hand again. “Call me Janus. I was sent by Roman to check on his soulmate. And I wanted to check on my soulmate at the same time.”

Logan blinked as he processed the information. The creature knew Roman, so it was most likely the same (or similar) species. And since it was staring at Patton…

Logan grabbed Janus’ hand, giving it his firmest shake. Logan was not submitting to this creature. “My name is Logan. I assume you are Patton’s soulmate, correct?” At Janus’ smirk, Logan tightened his grip. “If you harm him in any way- physically, emotionally, you name it- I will find a way to make the rest of your existence a living hell.”

Janus laughed as he also tightened his grip. “He’s gonna LOVE meeting you.” Logan remained impassive, knowing that a single sign of weakness could cause his end.

Because Logan was observant, and no way in hell was he letting his friend get hurt.

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Logan was loved.

Logan never really realized that. Sure, his parents said that they loved him, but Logan never really depended on his parents the way most children did. When Logan had a question, he read a book. When Logan was scared, his shadow protected him. When Logan was hurt or lonely, his shadow would comfort him. Most people depended on their parents to raise them. Logan raised himself. Most people saw shadows as a way to find their soulmate. Logan saw his shadow as a friend.

Maybe that’s why at 21 years old Logan confidently (and drunkenly) states that he’s never felt true love. Sure, he’s felt kindness and support (Patton and Virgil) but he’s never felt love. Sure, some nights he has long conversations with his shadow and lets himself believe that the way it twists and turns means that his soulmate can hear him. Sure, he sees Janus a few times every year (Logan knows by this point that Janus is letting himself be seen. Logan never told Patton about meeting Janus and they have yet to officially meet. If Janus wanted to be seen by Patton or not seen by Logan he could) and every time he begs to learn more about his soulmate. But that’s not love (he never says that around Janus. The creature can smell lies like Logan smells Patton’s perfume).

Maybe that’s why he drunkenly kisses a stranger at his 21st birthday party, ignoring the fact that he’s too short and his hold doesn’t feel safe.

Maybe that’s why when he goes to visit Patton weeks later and sees only a note that says His name’s Janus he crumples it up and throws it away. Maybe that’s why when Virgil texts him the same day simply saying Found my soulmate TTYL, Logan lets hope claw its way through his chest. Maybe that’s why when the sun sets and Logan gets no sign from his soulmate he curls up in a ball and sobs. Maybe that’s why he decides that he can’t wait any longer and he leaves his shitty apartment in the middle of his shitty town and heads towards the shitty forest that he knows is empty but he has to try.

Maybe that’s why when Logan’s so deep in the forest that he can’t find his way out and the moon hangs high over his head and he hears wolves in the distance he doesn’t get scared or sad. No, Logan gets angry. Angry at the world for rejecting him because of his menacing shadow. Angry at Patton and Virgil for leaving him for their own soulmates. Angry at his soulmate for making him believe for 21 fucking years that he had a chance at being truly happy.

A wolf broke through the tree line, lowly growling as he approached Logan. Logan growled right back, his irritation and heartbreak and anger clouding his judgment. The wolf howled, and Logan screamed. It was an odd feeling. Logan hadn’t screamed in a long time. He trusted his shadow to protect him, so he never screamed in fear. But the way his throat burned from his anger was exhilarating.

The wolf lunged, and it took Logan a few moments to realize that it never reached him. Logan heard a satisfying crunch as the wolf head landed inches from his feet. Logan looked up and saw a monster of nightmares.

It was at least 8 ft tall, with long, spindly limbs sharpened to a point. Green horns protruded form his head, and his eyes glowed acid green. His bloody teeth stretched into a too-wide grin, and Logan did not smile back.

Instead Logan screamed again. But it wasn’t out of fear (never out of fear). It was out of anger, and exhaustion, and relief, and something else that Logan couldn’t name. He lunged at the creature, wrapping his arms around the black and green tunic as he continued to scream. The creature continued to smile, using his too-sharp claws to hold onto Logan’s back. And Logan broke. He started to sob, losing the ability to stand as he leaned further into the creature’s chest.

They stayed there for almost an hour, Logan sobs being the only sound in the vicinity. Eventually, the creature spoke up. “It’s nice to finally hold you, Logan.” Logan continued to stay silent, burrowing his face into the creature’s chest. “My name is Remus. I know that it hurts, but you weren’t ready until now. I wanted to come get you the moment I saw your shadow, I swear. But I’ve always been there, even though ya couldn’t hear me. And I promise I won’t leave ya ever.”

Logan felt himself smile as he relaxed further into the creature’s his soulmate’s hold, listening to Remus babble out apologies and promises. Logan allowed himself to finally feel.

Because even though this was the first time they touched, Logan knew this wasn’t the first time they’d met. Remus had always been there to support Logan, even if he was hiding in Logan’s shadow. He was always there, and even though Logan was hearing him for the first time, Logan knew that he was in love with Remus.

And as they separated and Remus asked if Logan was okay, Logan let himself admit it. “I love you.”

And Remus repeated him, with no doubts or uncertainty. Because even though Logan refused to believe it before now…

Logan was loved.

#sanders sides #AU_gust_2020 #soulmate alternate universe #intrulogical #moceit #prinxiety #logan sanders #remus sanders #patton sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #Janus Sanders #my fic

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ayellowcurtain · 3 years

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Or maybe a fanfic about what happens right after the first kiss on the pool...do they go straight home or would there be at least a goodbye kiss or something bc I find that most believable

Could someone please write a fanfic about Noor going over to sander and Britt's place after the break up in the restaurant and having sander listen in on the entire conversation...how Noor is heartbroken but now sander knows robbe at least broke up with Noor. I just need to see some more of Sanders POV

This is not exactly a prompt sent it to me but I saw @filmnerdsworld ideas and I had to do it, hope they don’t mind!

Sander drinks his beer without paying much attention to it, trying to focus his attention on the conversation happening around him instead.

“Everything was fine and then suddenly he said it was too much, that he couldn’t have a relationship on top of everything.” Sander pretends he’s not noticing but it’s clear that Noor is holding back her tears.

“Robbe is immature, Noor. I told you, he and Jens are exactly the same.” Britt says in a way that makes it seem like she knows every inch of Robbe.

Sander can't really pick the moment Britt started to get on his nerves but he can barely keep a straight face when he hears her dumb comments like that one.

Robbe is too mature for his own good. Sander can't stop thinking about him and the guilt that's been eating him alive since that night they spent together. Robbe was brave and mature enough to break things up with Noor and Sander is still here, pretending this relationship is going anywhere. He gets distracted reminiscing, like his brain can only shut down from the conversation when he hears Noor talking about how their kisses were amazing and how much chemistry they had.

"...he tried but it just wouldn't happen, he's virgin, I think…"

Sander slams his beer on the table and the girls seem to finally notice he's there and this is not just a dumb conversation between the two of them.

“You shouldn't be telling other people about this.” He doesn’t care that he sounds angry.

Noor looks at Britt and Sander doesn't even bother, aware that she's annoyed at him for opening his mouth to argue. Noor, on the other hand, is clearly caught by surprise that Sander was listening to their conversation.

“I'm sorry.”

“You shouldn't be listening.” Britt thinks out loud and that's everything Sander needed to hear. He grabs his jacket and his phone at the table.

"Sander…” Noor tries to change his mind, more than used to being left in between these stupid fights but he ignores her.

“You can't leave!”

He ignores his girlfriend too, and leaves the bar before he says something he might regret. They need their privacy and Sander needs some fresh, cold air on his face.

If he really thinks about it, he knows why he and Robbe won't work. Robbe has things to work on himself and Sander can't deal with someone shitting on him again in a relationship.

Robbe's words still hurt, twisting his heart in a painful way that Sander can't explain. But it doesn't mean that he can control how he feels.

That night was the best night of his life. After weeks trying to find a way to be alone with Robbe, the chance was right in front of him and Sander doesn't regret one minute of it. Biking through the city, watching Robbe smile because of him, his extremities so cold he could barely feel his fingers, holding his bike handle so tight. Robbe looked happy, nothing close to being too drunk.

Maybe the water in the pool was cold but it didn't feel like it. Felt like the warmest, most relaxing water Sander was ever in. Robbe kept slipping away from him and Sander pulled him close every time.

Thinking back, Sander is sure it didn't happen that closely but his brain saved Robbe's soft moan against his lips at the exact same second the blinding lights turned on right above them like it was an explosion caused by Robbe's sounds.

Sander stops walking, not sure where he's going so he finds a bench and he sits to calm himself, ignoring how his jeans start to get colder and a little wet where he's sitting.

He looks at the water in front of him, moving slowly and he lets himself indulge, smiling when he remembers about both of them running downstairs still completely naked but Sander doesn't remember feeling self aware. The adrenaline was still rushing through his veins because of their kiss.

The door slammed behind them and there were no sounds coming from the inside, they both looked at the door, waiting to make sure they were safe enough to put their clothes on.

Nobody would walk down that path so late at night so once they thought they were safe, they finally put their clothes on in a silence that wasn't as awkward as the situation would make it. When Sander tried to quietly look up through his lashes he found Robbe still smiling while putting his shirt back on, his pants still unzipped and Sander tried not to think of how sexy he looked, his hair pointing to every possible direction.

He couldn't miss his opportunity, not when that night was going like a dream. So he held Robbe by his neck and kissed him again, as eager as they were inside the pool. The way Robbe crashed into him instantly made him smile against his lips, relieved that he was thinking about doing the same.

It felt like an eternity but also not long enough that they spent glued together, pressed against a wall, kissing non stop unless they were out of breath, smiling to each other, brushing their noses together.

Sander wanted to say so much, about that night spray painting the garbage truck, about the skate park, about how he was desperately waiting for this moment but he didn't find the courage.

The only thing he managed to do was whine and ask for Robbe to just leave his bike hidden somewhere in the bushes so they could bike together to his place and then Sander would go home.

Robbe laughed so contagiously and shook his head, saying the security guy would find it and keep it hostage. Sander promised he would befriend whoever it was to get Robbe's bike back. He would even ask for the guy’s name and ask if they could use the pool every once in a while.

His problem now is that he wants to see Robbe, to talk to him, kiss him, and say fuck it to all the rest. He'll gladly throw his pride out of the window. He selfishly wants to ask if Robbe broke up with Noor because of him, if he regrets the shit he told Sander that afternoon. Sander was sure he was going to wake up with a cold the morning after but he woke up and brushed any runny nose off, more than anxious to go see Robbe, kiss him for hours again.

Robbe's reaction was so far from what Sander expected.

The brightness of his phone screen makes him flinch and look at it, sitting next to him on the bench. After thinking so much about him, Sander had hoped it would be Robbe but it's Noor.

To Sander: Hey

Sorry for what I said

I didn't mean to share, it just slipped out of my mouth, I was upset.

Nobody knows and even though you and Britt are not good, I know she would never tell anyone

Sander rolls his eyes. The Britt Noor knows and the Britt he knows are two very different people. She won't tell if Noor asks her not to but Sander knows she won't stop complaining about Robbe to him.

He can almost feel that Noor is waiting for him to continue the conversation, asking about Robbe so she can whine to him too but he locks his phone, he'll answer her later and she'll get he doesn't want to hear it.

If it was up to him, he would go to Robbe's, spend the night with him, whispering late at night so his housemates wouldn’t hear them under the blanket, their legs tangled, lying so close their lips touch, Robbe's lips so wet and always with an easy smile.

Sander wants to meet him, to ask if he was really that wrong about Robbe because his heart tells him otherwise.

48 notes · View notes

whispering-raine · 3 years

Text

Heartbreak - A Sanders Sides oneshot

((TWS: HEART BREAK (yes that means that Patton is affected), PANIC ATTACK, BEING SICK, BLOOD, FEVER, PUKE, MENTIONS OF AN ARGUMENT, DESCRIPTIVE GORE/WOUNDS, MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, BLOODY ARTWORK AT THE END

3rd person POV:

Roman awoke, his eyes fluttering open as he examined his surroundings. He had fallen asleep in Pattons room the night before, so this was different from the normal scenery that covered the room he would usually wake up in. Family photos of the sides displayed in picture frames, kids toys lying everywhere but his desk, which was covered in random pieces of paper and probably a few recipes for cookies and other treats. Pattons room had become Romans safe space, and vise versa.

"Good morning, my dear~" Roman whispered, giving Patton a small kiss on his forehead. Patton gave a happy hum in his sleep, a soft smile following.

But something was off. His forehead was just a bit warmer than usual. His cheeks were tinted just a bit more pink than he was used to seeing. Roman sent a sympathetic look over towards the sleeping boy, walking out of the room.

He walked towards the bathroom down the hall, teaching into the medicine cabinet and grabbing a thermometer. He walked back, Patton still sleeping and hugging a stuffed animal.

Sweat was beaded on his face, which still held a tired smile, disregarding the shape he was in. Roman was careful to be quiet, holding the speaker of the thermometer to muffle the noise as he swiped the metal across Pattons forehead quickly. 102.1*

He muttered a quick "Shit." before taking the thermometer back to the bathroom. He quickly washed it off with warm water, putting the cap back on and placing it in the medicine cabinet.

He rushed out to the kitchen, in which he saw Logan typing away on his phone and almost chugging his daily cup of black coffee.

"Logan." Roman addressed the logical side. Logan almost immediately noticed the uneasy look on Romans face.

"Ah, good morning Roman. Is something the matter?" Logan questioned, putting his almost empty cup to the side and turning off his phone, setting it down on the table quietly.

"Yeah, yeah something is the matter. Can individual sides get sick?" His breathing was starting to get out of pattern.

"Well, yes, I suppose so. Are you feeling unwell?" Logan said in a concerned tone, walking over to Roman and reaching up to place a hand on his forehead. Roman politely moved Logans hand away with his own.

"No, actually, Patton has a fever and I was making sure that this was normal."

"Patton?" Logan questioned curiously. Roman nodded, confirming what Logan had once been so curious about. Logan seemed to think for a second, adjusting his glasses quickly and standing up straighter, although gay.

"Well Nico and Thomas got into a bit of an argument last night, so that may be the cause of it. But I'll do some more research in a little while to do a better and more proper diagnosis." Logan said, sitting back down and taking another sip of his coffee.

"Thanks, Nerd." Roman said before leaving, going back to Pattons room. He was going to make Patton feel better no matter the cost. He walked back into his room, the door creaking the slightest. Roman sighed, a sad smile curling on his lips. He layed down next to his beloved, wrapping arms around him and giving him the softest hug he could manage.

"Mm," Patton hummed, slowly waking up.

"Hello darling.." Roman whispered, rubbing the smaller ones back lightly.

"Are you feeling alright? You have a fever.." Roman asked as he awaited patiently for a response.

Patton could only manage a small shake of his head, leaning farther into Romans touch. "I-Is...everyone else okay though..?" Patton slurred, his words muffled by Romans shirt.

"I'm pretty sure. I haven't checked on everyone, but Logan and I feel okay." Patton responded with a nod, almost falling back asleep in Romans arms.

But he was awoken by the voice again, "Would you like me to make you some tea...?" Patton thought for a moment, before giving a small nod.

"But I can make it myself. I don't want you to waste too much time on me." He insisted, tiredly rolling off of Roman to sit up. He leaned back on his palms, repressing a yawn. Roman sat up with him, putting an arm around his shoulders and rubbing his upper arm.

"You're in no condition to be doing that yourself. I can get it for you, I promise." Patton slid his hand over Romans, intertwining their fingers silently.

"I'll be fine."

"No you won't." Patton let out a chuckle, smiling up at Roman.

"Ro, I'm fine. I'll get right back into bed after I get my tea."

"Fine. Then let me see you stand on your own."

Patton grabbed his glasses off of the nightstand, slipping them on. Roman helped Patton to a standing position, holding him as if he were a kid learning how to ride a bike. Roman finally let go, although only inches apart from the swaying boy. Pattons knees immediately buckled, falling into Romans chest with barely any control of his own body.

"See? I'm fine!" Patton joked, lifting only his head from Romans chest. Roman couldn't help but smile at the smaller boy.

"And this is why I'm making your tea for you."

Patton let out a whine, burying his face back into Romans shirt. The both wrapped their arms around each other, Pattons hung down at Romans waist; and Romans wrapped around his shoulders.

"Come on, let me get you back into bed."

Patton gave in at this point, allowing Roman to pick him up and gracefully lay him back down onto the soft covers.

"I'll be right back."

Patton layed on his bed, trying to stop the world from spinning around him as he focussed on a stain on the ceiling. A few extra minutes of sleep wouldn't hurt, would it? Patton let his heavy eyelids shut as he curled into a ball, trying to get comfortable. He was almost immediately woken up by Roman walking in, holding a glass of tea. The glass had a cat paw pattern on it. It was always Pattons favorite.

"Hello my darling~" Romans voice rang throughout the room once again, placing the cup of tea on the bedside table.

"Hi, honey.." Patton mumbled, rolling over to face Roman. Roman smiled softly, laying down next to Patton.

"Cuddles?" Patton asked, holding his arms out and doing grabby hands. Roman couldn't help but blush at this, sweeping him into his arms and holding him. Patton giggled quietly, smiling and blushing.

"Do you know anything about what happened last night?" Roman spoke up.

"No, is everything okay?" Patton immediately grew concerned.

"Well Thomas and Nico got into a bit of an..argument...late last night." Realization struck Patton like a brick. He finally realized why he felt so horrible. Heartbreak. Then why hadn't the cracks shown up yet?

"Do you have a mirror I can borrow?" Patton asked, sitting up and rolling off of Roman.

"What?" Roman was beyond confused.

"It's complicated! I just need a mirror and quick!" Patton began to shake, worrying about almost everything at the exact moment. This has only happened one other time, and Patton was lucky to survive it. But that was years ago. Patton didn't know if he'd make it through this one. Heartbreak. Such a literal term in the sense of sides.

"I think there's a handheld one on my desk, but that's all the was across the hall. You'd be better off just going to the bathroom." Patton nodded, slowly getting up.

"Are you sure you're okay to walk? I don't want you getting hurt. I can go with you if-"

"I'm fine," He reassured, stumbling quickly out of the room. That left behind a very worried and confused Roman.

Patton ran to the bathroom, holding the wall as he did so. He slammed the door shut, making sure to lock it as he leaned on the marble counter. He brushed his bangs out of his face with his hand, seeing the smallest crack, starting at his hairline and going down onto his forehead.

"Shoot.."

Patton knew that when something like this happened, Virgil was always affected. Whether Thomas is anxious that Nico doesn't love him as much as he used to, or he's scared that they're going to break up, Virgil is going to be affected to some degree. Patton made sure to put his bangs back in place, going out of the bathroom and towards Virgils room.

He creeked open the door, not trying to scare his dark strange son. Virgils head shot up as soon as he heard the quiet noise. He took off his headphones in a rush as he paused his music.

"Hey Kiddo, can I come in..?" Patton asked gently, peeking his head in. Virgil could only nod and hum, not trusting his voice. Patton walked in, closing the door behind him.

"Hey, Pat." Virgil mumbled, his voice slightly distorted. The father figure was leaning on the door frame, keeping his balance. Patton gave a small wave, walking over to his bed and trying not to collapse on the way.

"Dad, are you alright? Last night Thomas-" Virgil said quickly, before Patton cut him off. Patton stayed silent, but moved his hand up to shove his bangs back and show the small crack - soon to grow bigger - to Virgil. Virgil let out a gasp, he swore his heart stopped for a second.

"I-It can't be happening again...! No! I-I won't let it happen!" Virgil had started crying. Patton let out a choked cough, before wiping Virgils tears away with the other hand. The only thing that could be heard was Virgils rapid breathing, until Patton spoke once again.

"I'm going to be okay Kiddo. Relax. Take a breather." He said as he held Virgils face. His own dizziness almost made him fall over as he scooted towards the scared and anxious boy. Virgil nodded, trying to get his breath back to normal. Patton put an arm around Virgil, rubbing his back in the slightest.

"Here Virge, copy my breathing." Patton took a deep, exaggerated breath, trying not to cough. Patton whispered small reassurances, such as "It's going to be okay." or "Breathe,".

They seemed to be working as Virgil slowly calmed down. Once Virgil could finally breathe again, he layed his head into Pattons shoulder, in which Patton brought up a hand to stroke his hair quietly.

"What if something bad happens to you?" Virgil mumbled, playing with his hoodie sleeves.

"Then we'll cross that bridge when we get to it, Kiddo." Patton said in a tone that was at least one octave down from his normal, cheery one.

It was too serious. And it scared Virgil.

"But Dad..." His voice began to distort again, "...I don't think I can live without you..." This brought on a whole new wave of tears for Virgil.

"Oh Kiddo... C'mere.. It's going to be okay.." Patton said as he wrapped his arms around Virgil as tight as he could without hurting him. Virgil gripped onto one of those arms as if Patton would disappear if he didn't. Patton could feel the crack expanding down towards his eyebrow, something he'd have to cover up later with makeup. But he decided to ignore it for now. Although a tear escaped his eye, he still managed to keep a calm smile on his face.

Meanwhile, Roman was talking with Logan in the kitchen once again.

"I guess I'm just...worried? The last time Patton was sick like this was..." Roman said, trying to remember when the time he was referencing was. Then it hit him, "Thomas' last breakup." It was almost under his shaking breath.

"What're you guys talking about?~" Remus sang, walking in with Janus.

"Oh! Janus! Just the guy I needed to see!" Logan exclaimed, ignoring Remus completely.

"Hm?" Janus cocked an eyebrow, confused but still paying careful attention.

"You were there at Thomas' and Nicos fight, correct?"

But Patton overheard everything. Of course it was Janus who would've been in the fight. He probably caused it in the first place. Another piece of his forehead cracked, leaving a terrible sight. He actually trusted Janus for once. And he was mad at himself for it.

A few minutes passed of overthinking and hugging Virgil. Patton, lost in his thought, barely even heard the small curse that came out of Virgils mouth.

"Shit, Pat, you're bleeding." Virgil muttered, his tears now dry, but the stains still on his cheeks. The hug had ended, apparently.

"Hm?" Patton was still busy thinking, only looking at Virgil in his peripheral view.

"Patton for Gods sake pay attention to me! You! Are! Bleeding!" Virgil raised his voice, done with Pattons bullshittery for today, even though it was only the morning.

"Wait what? Where?"

Virgil reached up towards Pattons forehead, wiping a dribble of the red, sticky liquid off of his warm skin. Virgil was shocked, gasping in the slightest. He put his other, uncontaminated hand on the other side of his forehead, making sure not to hit any of the cracks.

"You're burning up." Virgil whispered to himself, placing a soft hand on Pattons cheek.

"Oh, I would've never guessed!" Patton joked, giggling a bit.

"Have you taken your temperature at all??"

"Roman mentioned something about a fever when I woke up, but I'm not sure if he took it." Virgil thought for a moment, Pattons words finally registering in his head.

"You...slept with Roman...?" Virgil recoiled, making a disgusted face at Patton.

"Not the point, but yeah, I slept with him." Virgil shook his head, trying to get those thoughts out of his head.

"Just...lye down, I'm grabbing the thermometer." Virgil said as get got up.

"But this is your bed?" Patton wasn't upset by this, no, but he didn't want to intrude. Especially considering the fact that Virgil normally didn't like the other sides touching his stuff in the first place.

"And? You're laying down. You're swaying just sitting there. Did you think I couldn't see it?" Virgil growled, putting a firm hand on Pattons shoulder.

"No." His voice was fragile and weak. Virgil could feel his anxiety heighten at this. He's never seen Patton just this vulnerable before. He gave a slight force to Pattons shoulder, pushing him out of the sitting position he was in, and back onto the pillow. He had barely pushed. Just a mere pressure, almost less than gravity gave.

Patton let his legs stretch out naturally, not bothering to stop it from happening. Virgil gave a slight sympathetic chuckle, pulling a thin blanket over him from the end of his own bed.

"I'll be right back, 'kay Dad?"

"M'kay.." Patton mumbled, curling onto himself and gripping the blanket. Virgil gave one more glance towards the curled up figure on his dark bed before leaving the room.

He came almost face to face with a fuming Prince as soon as he stepped into the hallway.

"Well hello to you too, Princey." Virgil remarked sarcastically. Roman just grumbled.

"If that snake wouldn't have been the only side awake during the argument, this wouldn't have happened." Roman just now looked up at Virgil, his eyes brimming with tears.

"Fuck off, I was there, too." He slapped his arm playfully.

"Wait, seriously??" Roman almost yelled, making Virgil wince.

"Yup." He said in a monotone voice, trying to leave the conversation. He started to walk away, but Roman caught his hood, keeping him in place.

"What is it now?" He grumbled.

"Have you seen Patton?"

"Yeah, he's in my room resting."

"Is he oka-" Before Roman could finish that question, it was immediately answered by a scream, coming from Virgils room.

"Shit." Virgil immediately ran back into his room, swinging the door open. Roman followed close behind, worry filling his veins.

Patton was curled up in a tight ball, his hands held over his mouth as black liquid mixed with blood poured from it. Tears were streaming down his cheeks in a steady flow, mixing with the other two fluids. He could barely see, but he was able to quickly yell a, "It hurts!!" as he screwed his eyes shut. He was hit with another wave of pain as more blood poured down his forehead. The crack was at least two times bigger than Virgil had last seen, although he was gone for barely a minute.

"Help.." He whispered as Virgil ran over to him, but Roman was stuck at the door. He couldn't move. He didn't know how to.

"Shh, shh, I'm here. It's okay. I know it hurts. Breathe. Breathe for me." Virgil rambled, holding Patton tightly in his arms.

"V-Virge..?" Patton whispered as he gripped the fabric of his soft hoodie, letting out another, quieter sob. Virgil just nodded, allowing Patton soak his clothes with tears and blood, making a mental note to clean it off later.

Logan walked in, confused but mad.

"WHY IS EVERYONE..." he saw Patton, "...yelling..." he finished, mumbling.

Heartbreak. What everyone in that room felt. Patton. Virgil. Logan. But especially Roman.

He was having his own mini panic attack, still standing in the doorway with Logan. Logan put a soft hand on his upper arm, rubbing circles with his thumb.

"It's going to be alright, Roman. Can you take a deep breath with me?" Logan asked, gripping his shoulders firmly, but in a caring way, making sure to not let go.

Roman gave a hasty nod, looking Logan in the eyes.

"In," Logan started, mentally counting out 4 seconds exactly.

"Now hold," He said as he began to count 7 seconds.

"Now out." 8 seconds.

Logan gave a satisfied smile, "Good. Now, can you try that again?"

They did the breathing exercise for a few minutes, Logan still holding onto Romans shoulders. But Logan moved his hand a bit to wipe a stray tear that was dribbling down Romans cheek, making it dry once again.

But more tears poured as Roman shook Logan off, going to his boyfriend. Logan followed, not having much else to do. Patton had calmed down - thanks to Virgil - the slightest bit. He was still coughing up a bit of blood, and the unidentifiable black liquid from before, though. But he could actually breathe now without letting out another sob, so that's progress. Even if it's just a bit.

As soon as Patton realized that Roman was there, he crawled over to him, laying his head on his shoulder. Roman wrapped his arms around him, giving him a hug, and a small kiss on the top of his head. Much to Logans and Virgils surprise, Patton broke down once again, leaning fully into Roman.

"Let it out, baby. Let it all out... It's okay..." Roman ran his fingers through Pattons soft but tangled hair, giving him small kisses. Patton sobbed so hard that it almost hurt more than the growing cracks. He just wanted to be okay.

Logan sat on the bed next to the others, making a small circle/triangle type group. He patted the sobbing boys back softly, trying his best to be comforting. Pattons eyes began to burn, more than tears ever could. He let out a small whimper, trying not to cry out in pain. He put a hand to his cheek, in which his tears were rolling down. Or well, he thought it was tears. But it was just the same black liquid as before.

Heartbreak...

What may be the end of Pattons whole life.

His actions being uncontrollable, he coughed hard, more liquid reddening his eyes as he sobbed.

"I-it...h-hurts..." He croaked out, curling in on himself as he shook.

"I know, Pat. Just keep breathing. It's okay. You're going to be okay." Virgil spoke, sliding into the hug. Logan decided to join the group hug, they all held Patton in their arms. Patton gave a sad, bloody, smile, enjoying the warmth around him. He coughed once again, more blood spilling out. None of the sides were bothered by the stains that soaked their clothes. But they were all bothered by the sight of Patton. It hurt each of them.

"I...I love you all.." Patton said much too clearly, pain contorting his face.

"Goodbye."

Heartbreak.

What had killed Patton that morning.

[And the artwork I promised in the warnings✨]

#sanders sides #patton sanders #patton sanders angst #heartbreak #angst #sanders sides angst #sanders sides fan fiction #sanders sides oneshot

29 notes · View notes

sidespart · 4 years

Text

Sibling Culture

Summary: Younger siblings Patton, Virgil and Roman share some stories about their older siblings Deceit, Logan and Remus. Patton and Virgil’s stories are cute. Roman’s are not.

Warnings: Abuse, Unsympathetic Remus, Non graphic descriptions of abuse, Not great understanding of mental health issues (child POV), authority figures not being very useful, child being exposed to sexual situations (very much not graphic). Ask if you want me to add more.

Relationships: Gen, but a bit of pre-relationship moxiety snuck in because I love them

“Hey, how’d you get that scar?”

Despite the warm day, Roman felt cold grip his insides, twisting upwards towards his throat and freezing any denial he could think of until he was startled by a laugh from Patton.

“Oh! It was Dee’s fault.”

Wincing, Roman twisted himself so he could see the other two properly. Patton was still sprawled out on the grass next to him, but Virgil had sat up. He was hunched over, peering at Patton’s leg. When he saw Roman carefully sit up to join him he pointed at a faded sliver of a scar, just above Patton’s left knee.

“What did he DO?” Virgil face had shifted into a scowl at the mention his ‘arch enemy’ but that faded quickly as Patton started giggling.

“It was when I was …four? I think? He convinced me the Easter Bunny didn’t come to our house because the Easter Fox lived in our yard. I had to go out and patrol the yard, make sure it was safe, or I wouldn’t get any candy that year.”

-It said something about years of friendship with both Patton and Devin Sanders that neither Roman or Virgil thought to question that logic-

“Anyway he let me stomp around there for ever and then he jumped out in this fox mask to scare me!”

“This kind’ve thing is why he’s a dick” Virgil muttered. His hand, Roman noticed, was still on Patton’s leg, thumb swiping idly over the scar.

“He was nine, Vee” Patton said reprovingly, although he didn’t actually deny the comment, “anyway, he didn’t know I’d snuck a knife from the dishwasher-

“You WHAT?-”

“A KNIFE?-”

“-there was candy AND a bunnys life a stake, guys I was taking it seriously!” Patton’s eyes were sparkling with laughter at the twin looks of horror on his friends faces. “Anyway, he startled me so bad that of course I dropped it right away – sliced my knee up as it fell.”

“oh my God” Virgil groaned finally relinquishing Patton’s leg so he could bury his face in his hands. “That could have been so bad Pat.”

“what did Devin do?” Roman asked quietly.

“oh, he freaked – Virgil will you come out of there I’m fine – yelled so loud both our parents came running. Then, once I was all bandaged up, he tried to convince them I fell off a skateboard.”

That was enough to make Virgil peak through his fingers, a frown on his face “Did you ever even own a skateboard?”

Patton shifted himself so he was sitting up as well, an extremely solemn look on his face.

“We did not.”

There was a brief, pregnant pause before all three of them cracked up, their laughter echoing across Vigil’s yard.

“Older brothers are the worst.” Virgil pronounced. Despite the heat of the day he was still wearing his thick hoodie over a t-shirt and jeans, but now he started pushing up his right sleeve “Did I ever tell you about the time Logan threw me out of the tree house?”

“He what??!” Roman yelped.

“He would NEVER!” Patton gasped.

“He did” Virgil held his right arm up, revealing a long puckered line that ran from his mid forearm across his elbow. “It was before either of you moved here, I had a cast and everything”

All three of them took a moment to admire Virgil’s scar, much more raised and defined than Patton’s, before Roman asked the question they were no doubt all thinking:

“What colour was your cast?”

“Purple.”

“Nice.”

“Did Logan really push you Virgil?” Roman had to do his absolute best not to laugh at the pout that appeared on Virgil’s face when he took in Patton’s heartbroken expression.

Logan McAlister, was four years older than the three friends and Patton had fixated on him the moment they’d met. Roman has spent years watching Patton go from hero worship to puppy love to full blown crush all while Virgil stomped along next to him like a gloomy, jealous, storm cloud.

Not that Virgil would ever admit that it was jealousy making him snap and snarl at his brother whenever his friends came around…but their relationship certainly seemed to become more civil once Patton had gotten over his crush.

Roman couldn’t really blame Patton either. Virgil had never said anything and Logan…Logan was cool.

“He built a plane.” Virgil muttered eventually, shoving his sleeve back into place. “or a glider or…something. A box with a sheet stuck too it anyway. We both sat in it and he pushed us out of there.” He pointed towards the somewhat dilapidated tree house nestled in the tallest tree in the yard.

Roman let out a low whistle. Now that the three of them were quickly approaching seventeen they had physically, if not mentally, started to outgrow the tree house. Which meant it was no longer useful for much beyond lying down almost on top of each other during study sessions or lazy afternoon naps. When Roman had first met Virgil at age ten however it had seemed enormous. And very high up. It would have seemed even higher whenever the Ill-fated glider attempt had happened.

‘Were you scared?” he asked, watching Virgil carefully, but the other boy just shrugged.

“I don’t remember much to be honest. We were both pretty small.” He grinned. “I just remember afterwards. Logan kept coming into my room to sneak me chips and read his Physics text book to me”

“Aww! That so sweet!”

“Such a nerd.”

“Yeah.” Virgil ducked his head a little, apparently agreeing with both statements. He plucked a few strands of grass from the lawn, twisting them between his fingers.

Roman glanced at Patton, concerned. They both knew Virgil missed his brother, away at college and not due for a visit for at least a month. They also knew that asking him directly about it was a guaranteed way to get the emo to tense up.

Just as Roman was debating launching himself into a rendition of Black Parade as a distraction Virgil rolled his shoulders a looked up at him.

“Your turn.”

That cold grip he’d felt when he thought Virgil had noticed one of his scars was suddenly back ten fold.

“Oh…”

That made sense. Patton had shared a dumb sibling story. Then Virgil. Now it was his turn. It was only fair.

“Well…”

Roman was suddenly finding it quite difficult to breath. And to think. What was he supposed to tell them?

“I…”

He sat frozen. While two expectant faces stared at him, he racked his brain for a story to tell.

When they’re seven Roman draws out his first story. Crude renderings of superheroes and scientists and scientist-superheroes in the rainforest. it’s boring Remus complains when he sees it. You’re boring Ro’. Make them fight! No - make ‘em smash that guys head in!

No! Roman shouts and Remus scowls. Grabs at the craft scissors lying on the table and jumps towards Roman; trying to both rip the paper out of his hands and cut it to pieces at the same time whilst Roman screams and screams.

Later, their mother gently cleans the tiny scratches on Romans hand whilst Remus sulks at the table. He started it Remus mutters and Roman feels his mothers arms tighten around him. Protective.

When they’re nine they get taken on a trip to the public pool in the next town. This pool is bigger than their local one with slides and pool toys and jets. The two of them spend a happy hour chasing each other with pool noodles and racing each other in the water. And then Remus pushes Romans head underwater and holds him down until his lungs are burning so badly he opens his mouth. He spends their last precious minutes of the trip hacking and spluttering. Clinging to the pools edge with his brothers laughter ringing in his ears.

When they’re eleven Remus sneaks into his room at night with their fathers laptop tucked securely under his arm. Wakes Roman up by crashing onto the bed next to him and says look what I found!

Roman isn’t really sure what he’s found at first. The sounds off, presumably to avoid alerting their parents in the room next door, the websites unfamiliar – it takes a few seconds for the pulsing blobs to be recognisable as people and when they do YURGHH! Roman shrikes slams the laptop closed whilst Remus howls with laughter what were they doing to that woman?!

what were they – oh my god your such a pussy Roman don’t you know? Let me show you another one-

Roman kicks and punches and shoves trying to get Remus away from him and Remus is laughing laughing laughing until he isn’t. Until their parents are in the room, shouting, trying to separate them and Remus is using the laptop like a bludgeon, slamming the edge into Romans ribs, each hit punctuated with Why! Do! You! Ruin! Everything!

The next day Virgil asks if he wants to come and play in the tree house and Roman says no. He has to be home early. Visitors. Virgil accepts the lie easily and Roman tries not to breath to deeply.

The thing is you cant blame Remus. You’re not allowed. Not really.

There’s something wrong with him.

What that something is seems to change often depending on which adult you ask. Every few months their parents bring Remus back from a new therapist with a new diagnosis and a new bottle of pills and big grins because THIS time they’re going to fix him.

When they’re twelve Romans mother smiles at him and says Your such a good boy Roman. You keep me going. Their mother doesn’t smile much these days and the sight of it is almost as good as the praise. I know its hard. It must be so frustrating for you.

Last month Remus had convinced an older boy to gift him a box of cigarettes. That morning he’d found them again and finally tried to smoke them, recruiting a reluctant Roman to keep watch. When he’d gagged on the taste he’d made exaggerated vomiting noises before stuffing the still burning end into Romans palm.

But we’re all in this together. You know?

Roman knows. He wants to help. He decides that unless the injury is bad enough he can’t fix it himself he simply wont tell his parents. He wants to help keep them going.

When they’re thirteen Remus watches some murder mystery show and decides to burn his fingerprints off on the kitchen stove. We should do yours too! Shoving his mangled thumb under Romans nose. The smell makes Roman gag. Remus’ eyes are fever bright. We could be partners in crime!

When they’re fourteen Remus decides he wants white streaks in his hair. And since they’re twins Roman should too. His attempt to bleach Romans hair as he sleeps leads to ruined sheets and a smattering of chemical burns across his neck and shoulders. He tells Patton it was a cooking accident and invests his saved allowance in jackets with high starched collars.

When they’re fifteen he tells someone.

Their school has an assembly. Some outside company performing a play about abusive relationships. The teachers all have their sombre This Is A Serious Topic Don’t You Dare Laugh faces on as the actors work. Roman watches closely, picking up on all the false steps and poorly delivered lines which he would surely have avoided if he was an actor. The story is about a school girl who gets into a relationship with an older man who turns abusive. All throughout the play she drops increasingly massive hints to her friends and family who blithely ignore her until she dies spectacularly and loudly in the final scene.

On one side of Roman, Patton is fully sobbing. On the other Virgil is quite possibly asleep. The actors come out to a smattering of applause (lead overly enthusiastically by Patton) and launch in to a pre-prepared speech. Remember the signs! Tell a parent or teacher if you’re in trouble! If you suspect your friend is in trouble! Abuse can happen to anyone! Abusers can BE anyone!

Huh. Roman thinks afterwards.

He probably doesn’t count if it’s a sibling though.

Remus isn’t a stranger. Like the man in the play. And they’re the same age.

Still.

The next day he feels like he’s in a trance.

He takes his jacket off in his first class. Art. Pat and Virgil aren’t in this class with him. Better that way.

There are bruises on his forearms. Dark splotches which are so so obviously made by fingers.

He waits. One minute. Two.

Roman! His teacher is in front of him, faster than he anticipated, alarmed look on his face. What happened to your arm?

Stay in the trance. No shaking. M-my brother did it. He wanted the TV remote.

A pause that seems to last and hour and then his teachers’ laughing a shaky laugh. Smiles at him exasperated but fond. Roman aren’t you two a little too old to be roughhousing like that?

Right

It doesn’t count.

You can’t be abused by a sibling. A few cuts, bruises, scars – that’s just sibling culture baby. Virgil and Patton have stories too – you don’t see them freezing up. Complaining

Don’t be a pussy Roman.

He puts his jacket back on and keeps it on for the rest of the day.

When they’re sixteen Remus comes home for the weekend, sits at the kitchen table and asks if Roman wants to hang out.

-Remus goes to a special school for behaviourally challenged students and only comes back every other weekend. Their parents cried when he left. Thought they’d failed. Felt devastated. Roman didn’t feel much of anything and wonders if that makes him a bad person-

Remus is calmer these days but Roman still says no. He has plans with his friends. Oh yes. Remus rolls his eyes Paddington Bore and the Virgin.

Roman glares at him. Don’t call them that. Even though that’s basically affectionate, for Remus. And Remus looks at him for a long moment before nodding. Standing up, shoving the table hard into Roman’s hip leaving him gasping in pain.

By the time he’s limped his way to Virgil’s house the sun is high in the sky. Patton suggests lazy nap time in the tree house and just looking at the ladder makes Roman want to vomit.

It’s such a beautiful day Padre he crys, lets lie amongst the wildflowers like the majestic forest nymphs we are.

Its literally just grass Virgil sighs but Patton laughs and Roman lowers himself stiffly down. Carefully keeps the pain out of his face as his hip makes contact with the ground. Turns away from them whilst he grits his teeth through it, ostensibly napping until Virgil says

Hey, how’d you get that scar?

“Roman?”

Virgil and Patton were both staring at him. Shit Roman thought. How long had he been day-dreaming? Day-reminiscing? Day-

“Earth to Roman.” Patton again, there was crinkle of concern between his eyebrows and that wouldn’t do at all.

“Well-“ Roman boomed in his best dramatic bellow, what Virgil call his ‘Prince Roman’ voice: “I am afraid I will have to disappoint you my friends, twins are not bound by your foolish ‘older sibling’ ‘younger sibling’ stereotypes”

“I mean, technically, one of you is the older sibling” Virgil muttered while Patton laughed “you’re seriously telling me neither of you ever did something dumb and got the other one hurt?”

“Virgil Madelaine McAlister-“

“Not my middle name.”

“-I will have you know that I have never done anything dumb. Ever. In my life!” he punctuated that statement with a dramatic point to the heavens. Patton was now laughing hard enough that Roman was fairly sure he should be offended and Virgil was fighting a smirk.

“You really never fight?”

“We’re a united front.” Drop it, drop it please just drop it he chanted internally.

And then, miracle of miracles, Virgil did. Letting himself flop back to the ground with a soft ‘humph’.

“It must be nice to have a twin” Patton said a little wistfully. Careful he arranged himself back on the ground so his head was cushioned on Virgil’s stomach. “you’re basically born with a ready-made friend!”

“And you get to do everything together” Virgil murmured a faint blush on his face and one hand hovering in the vicinity of Patton’s hair. “No one has to get left behind when one goes off to college.”

Roman glanced down at him, worried, but Virgil just met his gaze softly, one side of his mouth pulling up into one of his rare sweet smiles. “You’re so lucky Roman.”

Roman nodded. Ignored the quick flare of pain in his hip as he laid himself back down in the grass. He let out a contented sigh as the warmth of the ground sunk into his bones, soothing the ache

“Very lucky.” He agreed quietly.

#roman sanders #remus sanders #patton sanders #virgil sanders #unsympathetic remus #creativitwins #angsty not helathy creativitwins #fic #lockdown induced procrastination efforts #moxiety if your squint #like you dont have to squint hard #literaly never written fic before but why not is quarentine rules baby #my fic #sidespart writes

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joyrose-fandomer · 3 years

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Please, don’t fall for me (Sanders Sides fantasy school AU) Chap 3

Relationships : Future (Prinxiety, Intrological, Mocite, Platonique Moxiety and platonique Analogical)

POV : Virgil

TW : Water, Manipulation

Previous<<

------------------------------------

Virgil couldn't focus on anything after that.

He kept looking at the pamphlet and the folded paper on his laps.

The pamphlet showed a picture of a big white building. It looked like a bad copy of Harvard.

It was named "Pine hills High school and College of art, sport and science" which was long for nothing and boring like literally any school.

But most importantly, it looked pricy. So Virgil looked around the pamphlet but he couldn't find any price anywhere.

Tss, of course, they wouldn't.

It said on the pamphlet that the school had good infrastructure and good results in every sportive, artistic and scientific field. That it had 100% chance for the student to have a diploma and list several students that became important.

Virgil didn't know any of those names and most importantly, never heard of that school.

On the other hand, the folded paper was a lot less fancy. There was no picture only a name and a few commentaries.

It didn't look official in any way. In fact, it was very obvious that Remy had written everything.

But it gave a strange feeling, like the ink and paper weren't normal. Like it could disappear at any moment if Virgil stopped looking at it or if anyone else looked at it.

He knew it didn't make much sense, but he could swear that he saw the words glitter from time to time.

"The Argus school" was the name written on the paper.

"School for young magical creatures to learn how to control their powers in safety."

So, like a school of magic? When did Virgil step into Harry Potter?

It was so cliché and suspicious, Remy was surely messing with him.

What if it was all an elaborate prank?

What if it was a kidnapping technic and Virgil was falling straight for it?

Should he call the police?

Would they believe him?

But what if it was not a joke?

It was so unrealistic but it explained so many things...

That day when school ended Virgil didn't directly go home.

He went to the pool.

"Hello, do you have a ticket ?"

The young women at the entrance asked.

Oh. Well, he needed to confirm that too eventually.

The high school boy took a deep breath.

"No, I forgot...sorry"

Her voice was suddenly a lot softer.

"It's ok, I can give you one. It's 7$"

Alright, he won't have to meet her again, he could do it.

He took off his mask and hood

"I'm sorry miss. I forgot to bring money"

She blinked like she was trying to adjusted her eyes after being flashed with a stong light.

"Alright, I will take your name and you can pay later"

"Wait really?" Virgil exclaimed, not expecting the woman to actually let him get away with it so easily.

The woman smiled. "Yes, but don't tell anyone, I'm not supposed to do that. So what's your name ?"

"Virgil Apkallu"

"That's an interesting name could you spell it ?"

Virgil spelled his name like he always did. Before remembering an important fact.

"I don't have my swimsuit!"

She laughed. Virgil couldn't blame her, he really didn't think that through.

"Do you want to go home to pick it up?"

If he got home it would be too late, his father wouldn't let him go back out again.

He looked up at the women. Making eye contact with someone for the first time in what felt like an eternity.

"If I go home I don't know if I would be able to come back..."

She froze and thought for a bit before walking away and coming back with her wallet.

"Here, go to the dispenser and get yourself a swimsuit"

"Wha- but it's your money, I can't"

"It's fine kid, it's just 2$. Now go before we close"

Virgil sighed and bought simple black shorts. He thanked the woman and she let him get in.

He felt guilty. He knew he didn't ask her to do all that and she was the one who insisted. But he couldn't help but feel like he manipulated that woman.

But it's what he was trying to do, didn’t he ?

The pool was empty. It was late and during fall it was too cold to go swimming.

The pool attendants weren't here, probably thinking that no one would come at that hour.

So Virgil had the water for himself.

Time to get it over with.

The good thing with being an anxious mess like Virgil is that you end up collecting techniques to get rid of disillusions.

Often the biggest disillusions were the hardest to get rid of. It's the ones that make the less sense.

Like thinking everyone you meet want to kill you, or that your parents were secretly robots.

But the good thing is. The bigger they are the easier it is to prove your brain wrong.

If you don't turn into a wolf under the full moon, you're not a werewolf.

If you don't have magic powers you're not a witch.

And if you can't breathe underwater you're not a siren.

A normal human can't survive underwater for more than 5 minutes, a trained diver can stay at best 12 minutes.

Virgil only had to stay underwater until he felt the huge to breathe.

If he could stay underwater for longer than that without needing to go out to breathe then... haha no, it was stupid last time he was just confused because he fell into the pool in the middle of a panic attack.

He will be out in a few seconds.

He slowly went down the stairs. The water was colder than he remembered.

It was probably reckless to test that alone but at least no-one was here to stop him.

Once he was in, the cold was a lot more bearable. In fact, it was numbing pleasantly.

The only swimmer went around the pool using the border to hold himself. But he didn't really need it, it was mostly the lack of confidence.

Eventually, he let go of the side of the pool and swam to the center of the water.

He felt free. Like floating in space. Swiming was so easy, it was second nature.

Virgil set the timer at 0.

And go !

He let himself sink.

The echoes of the empty room, the lapping of the water, the far-away cars.

It all dissolved into silence.

The golden hue of the sunset reflected all around, slithering in the water like hundreds of glowing vines.

Virgil was still holding his nose under the water but he didn't feel the need to breathe. Actually, he was already breathing.

He brushed the side of his neck. His skin was taking off but it didn't hurt.

He breathed in.

Water entered the gap in his neck.

He breathed out.

Water went out of the gap.

Gills.

He never had gills. Since when did he had gills?

He let go of all the air he was holding in a string of bubbles.

He watched them float away. Reflecting the sunlight, making them shine the away fairy lights would.

Bright and clear.

When he tried to breathe through the nose, the airway seemed blocked and he ended up breathing by his Gilles again.

He was breathing underwater. He could see underwater.

He could see and breathe better than on land.

His hair fell on his face.

He could see his own eyes reflecting in them like a mirror and his eyes reflected his hair the same way.

This was new. Usually, they were both jet black.

He swam to one of the Hublot around the pool.

His hair reflected the pool around, perfectly merging with the water like they were trying their hardest to disappear. His eyes were hardly any better. They were glossy and blue with gold lights just like the water around.

Usually, his eyes were so dark he could barely see his pupils well now that his eyes were different... He still couldn't. Apparently, his pupils also got this mirror effect.

This one was probably not a new thing. The boy could remember every time someone had the great idea of pointing a flashlight at him only to scream because his pupils were shining like a wild animal.

The confused boy swam around.

It was so simple, like taking a walk around the park.

So peaceful,

So comfortable,

So pretty,

So safe,

It felt like home.

Virgil didn't know how much time he spent here. He didn't want to look at the timer.

He didn't want to walk. He didn't want to choke on air. He didn't want to feel the pressure of the world.

This was where he belonged. He was happy.

He didn't want to go.

He looked up. The golden light turned silver.

It was night. He needed to go home.

With a sigh, the half siren swam out. Posing the timer but not looking at it.

Everything was so heavy out there. Virgil dresses up slowly and difficultly. His clothes stuck to him and made moving even harder.

Taking a deap breath of his inhaler and dragging himself away from the pool.

The woman looked surprised that he was still here but she still waved him goodby with a smile.

The cold autumn wind gave him a headache, the boy hid his wet hair in is hood and walked.

By the time he arrived home, his body was freezing.

His mind bearly felt anything.

"Do you have any idea how late it is?

I was so worried! Where were you ?!"

His father immediately yelled when he opened the door.

Virgil stayed silent. He didn't feel guilty, just, empty.

He walked around mindlessly, working only on muscle memory. His father still yelling behind him but he couldn't hear anything.

When he took off his hood his father went silent and stared at him wearily.

"Virgil, why are you soaked ?"

His son took a deep breath and locked eyes with his parent with a serious expression.

"Dad. Who is my mother ?"

***<>============<>***

Sorry, the story didn’t advence a lot this chapter, I really just wanted to right water again ! (^u^’)

Tag list : @angstysunshine @sander-sides-fics

@moments-of-selves @sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes (I still don’t know if you want me to tag you or not so if you want me to stop just tell me ok ? (^u^))

#sanders sides fanfiction #fanfiction #sanders side au #virgil sanders #sander sides

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madraleen · 3 years

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The Hero of Ages - Brandon Sanderson 5/5 stars

Jot-it-down-as-it happens commentary and a meltdown that surprises no one.

Character arcs: Fulfilling/5 Payoff: Astounding/5 World-building: 100/5 Sazed: MVP/5 Elend: My love, my heart, my man/5 Vin: An.Icon./5 The Lord Ruler: We probably should have listened/5 Devastation: 4,5/5

Commentary

-Not that I’m biased, but where’s Elend? Where my man at. Is he thriving? I hope he’s thriving. -My baby has a beaaaard. -“I’m no lord,” “Well, you just became one,” lmao Elend. -Yes, Elend, be the cocky Allomancer you were born to be. -It’s so satisfying to see the additional POVs of familiar people, it’s like, “Oh! There you are!” -Is it a bird? Is it a plane? It’s dearest Vin! -Vin is so freakin’ iconic I just can’t. -Breezeeeee, my man is doing well! -Oh, but this is a brilliant explanation of the world setting, I can’t. -So you’re saying that Elend is ripped. -Okay so, Elend is definitely not the Hero of Ages – one down, a bunch more to go. The obvious choice is Vin, but this IS the Mistborn trilogy and I do not trust the obvious choice. Also, it simply sounds like Sazed? -High-key love that Ham calls Elend “El” and the others address him as Elend, my emperor baby is coming into himself. -There’s something very comforting in the fact that we’re still talking about Kelsier. -Quellion, you little hypocrite. -I like the depiction of Sazed’s depression. It’s simple and to the point. -I don’t know who Spook’s Kelsier is, but my God, I’m desperate for even a glimpse of fake Kelsier. -Antagonists that manipulate the heroes’ moves, that orchestrate it all and that you find you’ve been in their grip all along stress me the fuck out. -Kelsier’s a manifestation of Ruin, isn’t he. -Again, get you a man like Elend. -Yesss, let’s go to a ball, I miss them and you’ll get to share a dance! -I have a weird relationship with Spook’s POV. I like what he says and how it’s written, but I don’t care for him as much as for the others. -“She’d loved him long before he became dreamy,” lmfao, Vin, what a backhanded compliment. -Yesss, my babies dance, I cry. You pay off, Sanders. You pay off. -Shut the fuck up, this is the most romantic Vin and Elend thing in the most Vin and Elend manner, help. -KELSIER WOULD NEVER SAY HE DIDN’T LIKE BREEZE! -I like it when Vin smiles when she fights. -Wow, I didn’t need the tragic koloss backstory, but here we are. -I really do like Ham and Breeze. I didn’t think I’d eventually think of them so fondly when I started the trilogy. -Fucking Ruin was Reen’s voice?! Well, fuck me! -A strange thing is happening. I don’t like Cett as a person, but every time he calls Elend “son,” I get soft and comforted. -Elend with a mistcloak, h e l p. -Oh no. Oh no no, TenSoon will wear Kelsier, won’t he. -TenSoon singlehandedly saving the Luthadel citizens, what a bamf. -“A dreamer caught in a world with too much violence,” ah, that’s beautiful. -“It was like finding a beautiful plant growing alone in a field of burnt ash,” oof, Spook, you turned into a poet in this chapter. -As much as I love Elend the Emperor, at the same time I’m like, boy ain’t cut for this, let him be a philanthropist. -“I got delayed by an Inquisitor and a dark god.” IT BE LIKE THAT SOMETIMES, VIN. God, my girl is iconic. -We’re on the final part and I already miss the gang. -Good man, Elend, figuring out the mistfallen. -Her earring, oh my God, shut the fuck up, why does this make so much sense. -So Vin isn’t the Hero! It’s Sazed, isn’t it. -Undulating. -Rip kandra :(. Rip TenSoon :’(. -What do you mean Marsh’s axe was buried in Elend’s chest. Sanders, we’re not doing this again, ffs, I – -The axe did what to Elend’s head. I’m not coping well, I’m not doing fine, help help, hel – -VIN NO :((((( -So many major deaths, I’m traumatized!! I’m still not over Kelsier’s death, ffs! And Elend’s death was so cruel, stop saying headless, oh my god, help. WHAT DID YOU DO, SANDERSON! WHY! -Yay, Sazed, but – -Elend. Vin. Why. -Undulations. -Elend and Vin holding hands, help. -Sazed has spoken with our friends and they’re happy. Thank you for this. -Kelsier requested that Spook be a Mistborn, shut the fuck up, this hurts. -Kelsier knows about Spook, so it’s safe to say the gang knows and can see what they accomplished – the sky, the plants, the flowers, they know that they’ve won, they know that the world is restored, I’m crying. -Omg, Sazed must have spoken with

Tindwyl, too :’((( -Welp. Send help. -Thank you, gang. Thank you for saving the world.

#the hero of ages #brandon sanderson #books #book commentary #mistborn trilogy #spoilers #h e l p

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sincerelyravens · 3 years

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WIP Wednesday

based on this image

However, despite the sadness Jana felt whenever she thought of Beauxbatons and her wishes that she had never left her friends, there was something equally as thrilling and magical about being at Hogwarts. Whenever she had first seen the castle, leaning out over the side of a carriage drawn by threstrals, Jana had been amazed at the beauty that it held and how a feeling of warmth seemed to rush through her all at once—like she was home.

The castle itself had a large number of floors and secret passageways and moving staircases that Jana thought it was a travesty that no one had bothered to craft a map. The hallways were not just occupied by students and teachers; there were also ghosts, who liked to walk through the walls unannounced and figures in portraits that sometimes liked to abandon their frame. There was even a large dining room with four large tables for each of the Houses (Slytherins, Hufflepuffs, Ravenclaws, and Gryffindors—like Jana), a thousand or more floating candles, and an enchanted ceiling that showed the sky.

Outside the walls of the castle, there was the dark and looming Forbidden Forest where it was, as the title suggests, forbidden to go into without the presence of a professor. In the middle of the castle grounds, there was a massive lake where a colony of merpeople resided beneath the water’s surface as well as a giant squid who frequently surfaced to see the students. There was also a large willow tree that had a habit of swinging its limb at annoying birds or ruffling its leaves in annoyance. Closer to the castle, there was a cluster of greenhouses—filled with plants of all natures and levels of deadliness—and a decent-sized Quidditch pitch with stands towering high above the ground.

Over the summer, Jana had been brought to the school by the Headmistress and sorted into her house before the Head of the Gryffindor House, Neville Longbottom, gave her a quick tour. While Professor Longbottom had made extra sure to hit important places around the castle, such as the Gryffindor Common Room and dorms and the outside Greenhouses, little could’ve been done to help her overcome the massive learning curve. She, like the first years, was still struggling to learn the castle and its intricate hallways—and the trickster doors.

(discussion below the cut)

This week, I’ve decided to start a new “tradition” on my blog on Wednesdays by posting a section of my WIP. Recently, my writing has been rather slow and spontaneous (judging by me creating the idea and then posting ‘punch and tell’ in the same day) and it’s been incredibly frustrating to me. However, I’m hoping to get back to writing more frequently.

In addition, I’ve been working on what I want to highlight as my “WIP”: my Hogwarts AU. I know I’ve been saying it for months, but it finally seems to be coming to fruition. Finally. The plans are all set—the background characters, the changes, the plots. However, still, I find myself stuck and second-guessing myself and doing this story because well, it’s not a sobbe story (and, let’s be real here, that’s what everyone wants to see).

While this fic is a step back towards HP—my OG fandom and where I got my writing start as well as my favorite childhood world to disappear to—it’s also my first fic where I won’t be writing Sobbe and Robbe or Sander as the main POV character. So, while it takes a step into my comfort zone (into HP, where i know an embarrassing amount of minuscule trivia and random headcanons), it’s also a step outside of that because I’m starting a new pov with a character that I haven’t really written a lot of before: Jana.

Her book of Hogwarts AU—originally: the magic of betrayal; now: the curse of betrayal (or as I refer to it tcob)—depicts the story of season 1... with some minor changes. Of course, there’s the obvious such as magical classes and spells and flying broomsticks and ghost. But there are some also minor plot changes that I feel would be beneficial to focusing on Jana’s story—as well as taking out some that I just don’t really like as much—and inclusion of a plot that will hopefully focus more on Jana’s difficulty with school in the first half of season 1 (later in the season, she’s shown to be studying physics with Yasmina, but I always wished that they’d focus a little more on school).

(I’ve also included magical technology since texts/social media are such a prominent part of every-day life and there’s no way Muggleborn students can disappear off the face of the earth completely for 9 months of the year without people getting suspicious. I’m sorry.)

In addition, it also includes characters introduced later in the series—from the beginning. Milan has become the assistant to Madam Pomfrey, who is getting close to retiring, and Noor Bauwens and Aaron Jacobs are already included with their canonical friends from season 3. Sander Driesen—everyone’s personal fav—has also been included since the beginning, with one of my favorite non-canonical friendships to tie him into the season 1 storyline. I’ve also included some of my favorite OCs to enrich the background (and mostly because I’m too attached to them)—such as Valentin and Sophie from Safe, Jonathon from Jij Verliest, and Celeste (who now has the last name, Maes) from just friends.

As I mentioned, I’m rather nervous about this fic and I’m going to come right out and say it: it isn’t a sobbe fic. In the first book, Jana’s, I do not have it planned for them to even have an interaction—though currently both of them will have separate interactions with Jana. I know that hits/comments/kudos do not matter, but I’m also internally terrified that no one is going to read it or care for it. I’m writing for me, this is true, but I also love hearing that people are enjoying what I’m writing and regardless of any internal motivation that I feel, comments and kudos and asks fuel my motivation a lot more than people realize.

So, I apologize that this fic has been taking a long time—especially since I’ve been slowly working on the idea for about a year now—and I hope that I’m able to get it out to you soon. I hope you are looking forward to this story as much as I am.

#wtfock #jana ackermans #fic #this became a mini blog post but idc #tcob #the curse of betrayal fic

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formerprincewille · 3 years

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Wtfock has my favorite ohn clip, hands down. From the climactic feel of it, to wildfire being used again, to really understanding more about how Sander views himself, to Sander surrounding himself with drawings and photos of Robbe because he’s part of his safe splace, to the way Robbe knows exactly what Sander needs, to the sun/moon yin yang aesthetic, to combining it with minuut per minuut, to how soft Robbe is, to how vulnerable Sander is, to the way Robbe holds Sander as he breaks down, to the way they sink to the floor, to “I’m so happy that I found you”. It’s god tier.

Edit: another thing!! The way we see all their moments turn into exact sketches by Sander, making those shots feel specifically like they were from his POV. 🥺😭

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subtlereferencetomyinterests · 4 years

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Master Post

My Master Post for Sanders Sides fanfiction! These are arranged chronologically from newest to oldest, measured by the date they were completed and uploaded in full, so that will reflect the quality here. (there’s a ton more under the cut btw).

Fast Friends - ao3... (15k Remus-centric intruality, lopsided enemies to friends to lovers, humor and a bit of angst with a happy ending. tw; emetophobes beware!) Patton doesn't like Remus, until one day, he does! Well, Remus isn't buying it. So Remus is not about to be friends with him just because he wants to (no matter how much it maybe, kind of wouldn't mind that).

I’m Not Sorry - ao3... (6k remus-centric intrulogical. continuation of Did You Miss Me. Dead Dove: Do Not Eat.) Remus just wanted to get home safe to his wonderful, loving boyfriend. If some greaseball guy thinks he can screw that up, then Remus is perfectly willing to let the night take a turn for the vengeful.

Redamancy - ao3... (5k romantic prinxiety, fluffy friends to lovers with a smidgen of misunderstanding.) Virgil is undoubtedly excited about Nico. The thing is, that’s not the only person he’s excited about.

Did You Miss Me? - ao3... (13k romantic intrulogical, unhealthy relationship and mutual stalking treated light-heartedly. Dead Dove: Do Not Eat). Logan and Remus haven’t spoken in years. But that doesn’t stop them from keeping up with each other, through... various means.

The Down (and up)-side of Individual Expression - ao3... (8k romantic logince, angst w/ a happy ending, prosey and dealing w/ some kinda touchy subject matter vis a vis body image). As the sides have taken on vastly differing appearances over the years, Roman and Logan find themselves incredibly attracted in body and mind to each other. The issue is, Logan still has some trouble believing it.

Tree Bark and Fresh Fruit - ao3... (Fusion AU part six! romantic royality fusion returns for some prose and a lil bit of h/c). Patron doesn't come around often, getting lost in the excitement of Patton and Roman's new romantic relationship- so when she gets a shot to exist again, he's determined to make the most of it by figuring out just what the heck he's supposed to be.

Bitter Licorice and Bright-Blue Bubblegum - ao3... (Fusion AU part five! analogical fusion is back!) Logan and Virgil end up fusing much more regularly, much to Livril's satisfaction at getting to exist, and virtually every other side's chagrin at having to put up with them. Everyone, it seems, but Patton.

Scary Monsters and Family Bonds - ao3... (Fusion AU part four! Platonic anxceitmus with romantic dukeceit, short and mostly meaningless.) Rennet, freshly born like five seconds ago, is desperate to find some people to bother and/or amaze. But instead, Rennet finds an attachment that nobody quite expected to be so intense, but hey, it's not complaining, and neither is Virgil.

Acceptable Behavior - ao3... Remus is surprisingly concerned about his boyfriend's boundaries. (short & sweet intruality drabble. p/ much just cuddling)

On Truth and Untruth - ao3... Janus is allowed to participate in the group, and that is more than enough for them. Not too bad of a change up, really, and they aren't going to complain about it any time soon. Patton, however, insists on throwing a wrench into their system- their perfectly functioning, if maybe hypothetically a bit lonely, system. (28k word janus-centric romantic moceit and platonic dlampr, lots of angst and lots of yearning, with a happy ending. something of a character study.)

I Taste Honey but I Haven’t Seen the Hive - Chap.1, Chap.2, Chap.3, Chap.4, Chap.5, Chap.6, Chap.7, Chap.8, Chap.9 - ao3... (Finished!) Patton doesn't think of himself as misunderstood. More accurately, he's not very good at explaining himself. Remus explains himself perfectly well, succinct, confident. People are just bad at listening. Patton is lonely. He'd never say it out loud. No one knows. Remus is lonely. He says it in everything he does. No one knows. They're similar. They're different as can be. Contradictory, maybe; complimentary, definitely. They could be good for each other- they just need to explain it right. (hurt/comfort, eventual queer-platonic intruality, a healthy amount of angst).

Sharp Spikes and Glamour - ao3... (part three of my Fusion AU! a little angstier and racier than the others, but that’s thanks to the dukeceit dynamic, and its nothing too bad). Now, just a month ago, Remus could very confidently say that his and Janus’ relationship was perfect. And it still was, really, but that was before Roman and Patton had pulled some cartoon fusion bullshit that exactly no one had known was possible. There was no question. Remus was going to learn to do that.

Squishy, Precious Lil’ Baby! - ao3... Very short, platonic intruality fluff. Remus turns into a rat for a scare, but Patton is very unafraid of him in the new form.

Black Cloth and Star Systems - ao3... (Almost 4k fluff, part two of my Fusion AU! Very heavy on the descriptions, and also the Love that these two Have.) After Patton and Roman fuse, Logan can't help but feel desperately curious about this new discovery, and the possibilities of fusion between sides. But, his interest is a little more personal than he could stand to admit... Because what if- what if he could try it, too?

more under the cut

Flare Up - ao3... Human au drabble. Romantic sleepxiety. They are soft and in the rain.

Soft Walls and Roses - ao3... (Part one of my Fusion AU! Fluffy, sweet, and prose-y. Abt 3k.) On a nice, cheery day, Roman and Patton get a little lost in a dance <3.

Communication Issues (Alternative Title: Three Touch-Starved, Insecure, Metaphysical Beings Constantly Misinterpreting Each Other and Yet Somehow Falling in Love)- Chap.1, Chap.2, Chap.3, Chap.4 + Epilogue - ao3... (Finished!) What do you do when you find someone crying, and it’s all your fault? What do you say when you hear the muffled sobs and frantic words behind the blood-red door? When you know that, no matter how much you never wanted to hurt him- never wanted to hurt anyone- you still did. Is there anything you can do to fix it, when you’ve spent so long pretending that nothing was broken? When you’ve spent so long pretending that you didn’t care if things were broken or not? (Second Person, Present Tense. H/C slowburn. romantic analogince. Note: this is not an ‘x reader’ fic, it’s just 2nd person pov.)

A Study in the Pains of Romance as a Genre - ao3... Logan wasn’t 'insecure', by most measures. Sure, he wasn't exactly in love with himself, but he knew the harm that came of self-deprecation, and was careful to avoid it. At the worst of times, he could solidly be called 'self-neutral'. Therefore, it followed that Logan was being entirely objective when he said that he would not be a good enough romantic partner for Roman. (Friends to Lovers, abt 4k, romantic logince).

I Like You, Say It Back. - ao3... Short, sweet, slightly angsty first ‘I Love You’ between Virgil and Remus. romantic dukexiety.

A Misplaced Imbalance of Fear - ao3... almost 7k friends to lovers fastburn, in that this happens in a day. Set during/right after Putting Others First, a little peak into what Virgil and Remus were doing. Hint; being a little sad and very gay. romantic dukexiety.

The Ballroom - ao3... Every side has a room, but they also come with a special domain, completely individualized to each one. Of these Extensions, the only room that no side (other than its owner) has ever seen is Janus’. At least, until he falls head-over-heels for Roman and finally lets him in. (romantic roceit).

Hypothetically, - ao3... Nearly 7k friends to lovers, with a hearty helping of platonic logince. Logan likes to use the Imagination for experiments, but he can’t manage to use it on his own. The solution is obvious. (romantic intrulogical).

No Other Version of Me - ao3... Patton isn’t very happy about his new froggy features, but Janus finds him gorgeous all the same. Hurt/comfort! romantic moceit.

Complexities Unknowable- Chap.1, chap.2, chap.3, chap.4, chap.5, chap.6, chap.7 - ao3... (Finished!) Slowburn with pre-established Dukeceit, rivals to friends to lovers, with Background Analogince (plus some platonic anxceit and Creativitwins thrown in for funsies). romantic deintruality.

I’d Like To Stand By Him - ao3... Roman and Virgil listen to each other’s playlists. romantic prinxiety.

An Open and Honest Conversation About Our Feelings - ao3... hurt/comfort, shamelessly self-indulgent. Patton doesn’t come out of his room all day, so Virgil goes to check up on him. romantic moxiety.

Something to Uplift Us - ao3... Roman-centric (and Remus-centric) DLAMPR (platonic Creativitwins!). Quarantine shenanigans; the boys put on a show for their boyfriends!

Thursday Nights - ao3... Short fluff where Remus and Patton watch a horror flick together and cuddle. romantic intruality.

5 Times Logan Helped His Partners Get Their Shit Together +1 Time They Returned The Favor - ao3... Summary’s in the title on this one, Bud. Logan-centric romantic DLAMPR (platonic p & r), very hurt/comfort.

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peaceoutofthepieces · 4 years

Note

Hey! I’m really sorry I’m not really a fan of vds (😬sorry folks, feel like that’s blasphemy in the tag these days) so probably won’t be able to get into this new fic even though it sounds great! But I love your writing and your social media au so much!

Do you have anymore sobbe fics I can get my teeth into to avoid watching this current shambles season?

Also if you have any recommendations for other writers too that would be fab, ao3 is a bit of a minefield but based on your writing I trust your judgement! ☺️

Have a lovely day ✨

hey!!! each to their own, no need to apologise to me 🥰

this may take a bit of organisation so bear with me

if you’re looking for more of my sobbe fics:

when I live my dream is the first au I did but it is half vds

show me some stars is a 5+1 type fic I wrote during s3 that’s a bit like missing scenes and it is purely sobbe (it’s quite angsty though but also very soft)

and coffee and croques is a coffee shop au I wrote that has some background elu! (and a tiny bit of vds. because it’s me. but it’s just a sobbe fic I promise)

now for recs:

honestly I think these ones are very popular and you’ve most likely read them already but I’ll give you the fics I’ve bookmarked!

I say these every time but imma continue to do so — just read everything by @hopelessromanticvirgo, all their aus are perfect and sobbe (though angsty too, so be aware!) you’ll find all the links on their page!

all of @djsander’s fics. all of em. you can find their ao3 here. ‘unattainable’ is iconic, ‘safe’ is sander’s pov of that (and AMAZING), ‘we’ve been through a lot of things, you and I’ is the angsty childhood friends fics everyone needs, ‘jij verliest’ is the gamer/tattoo artist au of your dreams. enjoy!

rotten work by aholynight is just iconic. angsty. daredevil-y. beautiful.

dreaming of you by bonjourmags was super interesting. Sander seeing Robbe in his dreams before he meets him. background elu. it’s a cool fic

All You’ve Got To Do Is Win by berrevy. the sobbe tennis game! fluffy and cheeky and adorable

Draw Me A Flower? by robbesanderx. florist!robbe, tattoo artist!sander, what more do you need?

My darling, I’m rooting for you by allforyoumylove. bit angstier. hurt/comfort. soft.

the night we met by themoongirl. college au!

Falling For You by silver_etoile. soccer au with a tiny bit of background vds. interesting characterisation and stuff in this one

paint me in trust by themoongirl. now I know this was popular but if you’re dubious over the vampire idea DON’T BE (unless it’s like a really no-go type thing for you, but honestly it’s just so well done)!! this is one of those fics, the one you have no idea you desperately needed until you read it. an actual gift. I wanna reread

our camp of dreams by robbesanderx. summer camp au, lot of cute kids and games and pining and yeah, amazing

This isn’t our first time around by noobishere. I legit just read this last night and it’s so good. if you love the parallel universe theory, this fic does an amazing play on it

they’re my saved ones! since they’re all a bit angst-leaning though (that’s my game) I’m gonna link you to this rec list of lighter sobbe fics too :)

#sobbe #sobbe fic rec #fic recs #long post #asks

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ravenbrenna09 · 4 years

Text

Safe - Chapter Three

AO3

...

HAHA, I finished it. FINALLY.

I'm sorry that it's taken me so long to complete, but with presentations and tests, my schoolwork has pretty much been kicking my ass and forcing me to be unable to write or push it back (as you guys on my Tumblr know). Add that with my fucked up sleep schedule and it's only worse! But, it's okay because this chapter is finished so I hope you all enjoy this chapter!

Good, maybe bad news how you see it, this story will only have four chapters! After Safe is finished, I’m going to taking a week-long break to work on other stories (specifically my Potter Siblings one, Harry and Ron have been fighting the troll for weeks) and do some more live blogging more episodes before I start on my WTFock @ Hogwarts AU. So, now that is out of the way, I hope you enjoy!

...

His body was tired.

His mind was tired.

His hands were tired.

Sander was exhausted.

His heart was screaming at him, two conflicting thoughts resounding through his body like the beat of a drum, not the good kind, but the loud and obnoxious kind. One of his thoughts was urging him to go to sleep. His entire body screamed in exhaustion, in being tired, having worked all night, trying to drown his sadness into the worn paper of his sketchbook, sketching the same face over and over again until his hand physically hurt.

But, the second thought, the one that had been present, lingering in the background, was now a renewed melody in the front of his mind, now that Sander had slammed into him in the lobby of his apartment complex. Robbe. Robbe and his doe-eyes and his single earring and his dimples. Part of Sander wanted to go out and find Robbe and explain, but he knew that Robbe was crushed, that Sander had been the one to do that, and…

Sander locked the door behind him, tears slipping from the corners of his eyes. He tossed the bag with his cold groceries in the fridge and he placed the bag that needed to be sorted into cabinets on the kitchen counter and, somehow, he made it to the couch, collapsing down on the cushions, his body shutting down and forcing him into a restless sleep.

Even as his body forced him into sleep, his mind kept waking him up, pulling him in and out of sleep.

He remembered waking up to send Robbe a message, to see if he was okay, and he barely managed to hit send on the third and final message before he was slipping into his dreams again, dreaming of Robbe and his doe-eyes and his burgundy beanie and his infinite universes. He woke up to the sound of the front door opening, the image of Robbe slipping from his fingers, the voices of Amber and a man whispering to one another, but it wasn’t Estelle or a woman with brown hair so he turned around, going back to sleep. He woke up to pillows being put under his head, someone moving him so he could spread out, covering him with a blanket, pressing a kiss to his forehead, and he mumbled out something before he was gone again, blinking in and out of sleep like it was the most natural thing in the world.

When he woke up, for real this time, the loss of the Robbe in his dreams evident when he awoke, clutching his own leather jacket like a lifeline, the blanket on his shoulders weighed down on him and the soft light of the morning (or the evening?) was filtering through the crack in the curtains and Val was curled up in the armchair, his head resting against the back of the chair, his ash-blond hair spilling over his shoulders and sleeping peacefully.

Sander sat up, panic filling his system. He shoved off the blanket and dropped his leather jacket on the bed and moved through the house. He searched the bedroom and the bathroom and the closets, searching but never finding her, Estelle. Val found him, peering into the closet in his spare-bedroom-turned-art-studio and letting him know he was there, letting out a yawn. “Sorry man, I didn’t realize that you had woken up. I must’ve fallen asleep myself.”

Sander swallowed. “How long was I out?”

Val checked his watch. “A day. I was coming to bring you your jacket and I realized I didn’t know where you lived so Amber let me in. When we saw that you were passed out, I knew that something was wrong. You don’t seem like yourself and I was worried about you.”

“You should’ve woken me up,” Sander mumbled.

“No, I shouldn’t have. You didn’t look good at the party, Sander. Hell, you left without your jacket and without saying goodbye! Who knows how cold it was driving back here on your motorcycle without at least some form of protection from the cold?” Val spoke, crossing his arms over his chest. He was raising his voice, like he always did when he was passionate and concerned, and Sander didn’t know what to do, running a hand through his hair, his anxiety running high. “Look, I know that there’s something going on with you and you know that I’m always able to know. But, you cannot carry the world on your shoulders, okay? You’ll just end up hurting yourself and the people around you.”

“I know,” Sander whispered, thinking of how many times he had parroted the same words to Camille, his baby sister, who used to walk around with the same thoughts in her head.

“You know that you can talk to me, right?”

Sander nodded his head.

“So, what’s going on?”

Sander swallowed, looking over at his friend standing in his art room, his old childhood friend that had seen every single ugly side of Sander and had stayed with him, that was willing to accept him back into his life with open arms even after Sander had stepped away, following Britt’s wishes. And, Sander found that he couldn’t keep this from him, that he didn’t want to. “You have to promise not to tell Amber, okay?” Sander whispered and Val nodded his head. “I haven’t gotten a chance to tell my mom and that’s a face-to-face conversation that you need to have, you know?”

Val nodded again. “I understand, Sander.”

“There’s a girl… that’s been stalking me…”

And, so, Sander told him. He told Val about the messages that Estelle had sent, about the ones that were simply asking about his day and about the others which involved pictures or words that were inappropriate to send to someone you didn’t know. He told Val about how he and Camille had been headed to see a movie, to hang out before she went on her vacation, and returned because Sander forgot something, only to find the girl stalking him in her living room. How he managed to get a restraining order. How he saw her knocking on doors the other day.

“Have you told anyone?” Val spoke up. They had moved into the kitchen. Sometime in the past twenty-four hours, Val had been in here, taking some things out of boxes and organizing them around. Val knew how particular Sander was, so he vaguely where Sander liked things. He had set up the coffee ingredients, the ones that Sander had just been fishing out of the box to put them back, next to the coffee maker. When Sander didn’t answer, Val continued, “About her knocking on doors?”

“I told my landlord, but I haven’t told the police yet,” Sander admitted.

“Why not?”

“They can’t arrest her for anything,” Sander replied. “All she did was knock on some doors. And, besides, if I went to them and they go question her, she would know for sure that I live in this apartment complex and all she’ll end up doing is coming back.”

Val nodded his head, understanding. “Yeah… I guess you’re right.” He glanced over at Sander. “Is that why you ran from the party? Because you thought she was there?”

“No,” Sander replied. “I left for a different reason.” His friend’s eyes got narrow, staring at him with a confused glare, silently telling him to spill it. “Okay, okay… before I realized that she had found out that I lived in this apartment complex, I was seeing somebody.”

The mere thought of Robbe was enough to make Sander smile. But, the image was quickly drowned, taken over by the words that he had sent to him, his mind’s own conjured image of a broken Robbe, sad and defeated all because of him. His smile disappeared and Sander bit down on his lip, the pain briefly batting away the words that flooded in his mind.

You’re toxic.

“Who were you seeing?”

Sander swallowed. “His name is Robbe. And, he came over to the apartment a few times…”

Val nodded his head. “Well, you seemed really happy for a second there,” Val noted, looking grim. “Did you guys have a bad breakup? If I had known, I wouldn’t have been all over Soph. I’m sorry.”

“No,” Sander interrupted, shaking his head. “No, it’s not that. I promise.” There was a look of relief that crossed over Val’s face before it was replaced with one of concern. But, he didn’t have to ask this time for Sander to continue, “After I realized that she had found me, I had cut it off. I really like him, but I couldn’t stand the thought of him getting hurt because of me.” Val opened his mouth to respond, but Sander didn’t let him talk, adding, “But, he doesn’t want anything to do with me now. He saw me kissing that girl, Laura, and he ran out of the club.”

“How do you know he saw you?” Val questioned.

Sander sent him a look.

“What? It’s a valid question!”

It was, but Sander didn’t want to admit it. “Why else would he go running from the club and leave all of his friends behind with no idea where he went?” Val seemed to nod his head, leaning against the counter. “And, besides, it’s all my fault that he got hurt.”

“Hey, you had no idea that he would’ve been in that club,” Val interrupted.

“I should’ve.”

“Sander,” Val spoke, crossing his arms over his chest. “Stop putting so the blame on yourself! It is not your fault.”

“But, it is my fault.”

“How so?”

“I got too comfortable,” Sander admitted, feeling the tears prick his eyes.

He was unable to look up at Val, certain that there was an exasperated look in his eyes. “Sander, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you being comfortable.” He took a step forward, closer to Sander, but he still refused to meet his eyes. “There’s nothing wrong with that.

“I got too comfortable, Val,” Sander started. He felt Val move to interrupt, but he shook his head, silently telling him not to. “No, it’s true. I got too comfortable and I wasn’t thinking. I thought that I had lost her because of the restraining order and moving away. But, I didn’t. She showed up, here, knocking on doors, and I almost put someone in danger because I got too comfortable.”

Val let out a sigh. “Sander, look at me.” Sander raised his eyes to meet Val’s blue ones. “It’s not your fault that this girl has attached herself to you. But, you don’t need to punish yourself for something that you can’t control.” Sander wanted to believe him, but he couldn’t. “Does Robbe make you happy?”

Sander blinked. “Huh?”

“Does Robbe make you happy?” Val repeated. Sander didn’t reply right away, his mind conjuring images of Robbe in his bed, his arms and legs wrapped around Sander like a koala, and the warm fuzzy feeling, so foreign and new filling up his entire body. And, Val spoke up, only partially obliterating the image, “You might as well go ahead and say yes because I already know the answer.”

“Yes,” Sander replied, laughing lightly.

“See? Was that so hard?” Val replied.

“No,” Sander replied. “But, that doesn’t change anything.” Val raised an eyebrow. “Robbe, he still ran out of the club.” He glanced at his phone, which Val had brought it. There were notifications from Amber and Sophie and his mom (and Britt, he rolled his eyes), but Robbe’s name wasn’t on the screen. “He still hasn’t responded to my texts.”

“But, he’s worth fighting for, right?” Val spoke up. “Sander, it’s been a long time since I’ve seen you look like this… Actually, I don’t think I have. Whoever he is, he makes you happy and you deserve it.” He reached out, patting Sander’s shoulder. “You want him. You owe it to yourself to try and make this right.”

Sander nodded his head. “I missed you, Val.”

“I missed you too,” Val replied. “Oh, by the way, I posted on your Instagram while you were asleep because I saw that some people were commenting where you were on old photos. It was just a photo of boxes with the caption ‘unpacking’. You can check it if you want to.” Sander pulled up his Instagram account, finding the photo in question. “I’m glad I decided not to go with a window setting, but I didn’t want to post something like that without your permission.”

“Thank you,” Sander replied. “Wait, you follow me?”

Val rolled his eyes. “Of course, I do.”

#brenna writes #safe: an unattainable spin-off #safe: sander’s pov #sander driesen pov #sander driesen #robbe ijzermans #sobbe #rosander #sander x robbe #wtfock #wtfam #wtfock fic #my fic #unattainable fic related #sobbe fic #rosander fic #three out of four chapters completed

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emy-loves-you · 4 years

Text

Sanders Sides AU-gust Day 18: Bodyguard

When Logan signed up to be the bodyguard of a wealthy (and questionable) man’s son, he thought it would be an easy job. Just sit in the background and make sure the kid doesn’t get killed. He didn’t expect the kid to be his age. Or flirty. Or dating his ex. Logan POV, eventual Analogince with parental Moxiety

Day 17 | Masterlist | Day 19

Logan sighed as he twirled the ballpoint pen between his fingers. He was sitting in the middle of a cafe, filling out a crossword puzzle. He took a sip of his chamomile tea and bit back a grimace. It was exceedingly bitter; the coffee shop he normally went to served much better drinks. But he wasn’t here because of the drinks. He briefly looked up from his crossword to quietly observe the real reason he was here. On the other side of the cafe, scrolling through his phone while he sipped on an iced coffee, sat Virgil Tempest Sanders, son of Patton Sanders and heir of Sanders Financing.

Logan thought back to everything leading up to this moment. Before this, Logan was commonly hired to take out corrupt politicians and gang leaders. So when he got a call from Patton Sanders to be a bodyguard, he was shocked to say the least. Patton Sanders was seen as the epitome of goodwill; he frequently donated to charity, has never spoken ill will towards anyone, and always had a smile on his face. So it was extremely odd for him to contact an assassin who was frequently hired by much more sinister individuals. But apparently Logan’s skills impressed Mr. Sanders enough to provide Logan a more permanent (and well-paying) job.

The job was simple: shadow his son any time he was out of the house. Virgil was kept on an extremely short leash after he was ‘kidnapped’ 5 years ago. He was only gone for a few months, but it was enough to essentially put him on house arrest. Virgil was only allowed to be out of the house between 10 AM and 5 PM. Mr. Sanders paid Logan to watch Virgil during these hours. When Logan had first learned about the job, he’d nearly scoffed in disbelief. He didn’t want to be babysitting a child! But after hearing about what wages he’d earn, Logan quickly changed his tune.

It was also shocking to learn that Logan actually wasn’t babysitting a child. Virgil was 23 years old; shockingly close to Logan’s own age. The age surprised him for several reasons. First of all, why was Virgil kept on such a short leash at 23 years old? Sure, he was kidnapped for a few months (which Logan doubted was an actual kidnapping. It was more likely that Virgil ran away) but that still didn’t warrant such restrictions for an adult. Second of all, Virgil still looked like a teenager. He had an extremely youthful face, with large brown eyes hidden beneath an oversized purple hoodie. He was actually quite attractive, almost as attractive as-

Logan figuratively shook the thought away, attempting to focus on the crossword puzzle. There were a few words that he was stuck on, but he was most likely going to stay here for a while. One of the perks to this job was that Virgil only tended to go to four places: this cafe, the local library, a small music store on the other side of town, and the local park. Still, Logan had been following this pattern with Virgil for the past two months. A small part of Logan, the part that smiled slightly when he managed to shoot someone directly between the eyes, wished that something would happen to spice things up-

“Amir.”

Logan looked up and was surprised to see Virgil leaning over his shoulder, staring at the crossword puzzle. “What?”

Virgil smirked. “‘First name that can mean ‘prince.’’” He took the ballpoint pen from Logan’s hand, which he had been lightly nibbling on. Logan bit back a gasp as Virgil deliberately ran the pen against Logan’s bottom lip before using it to write ‘AMIR’ on the crossword.

Logan examined the paper and was surprised to see that it was the correct answer. He blushed as he turned back to Virgil, who had a smug look in his eyes. “Th-Thank you, Mr…?”

Virgil smiled, settling down in the seat across from Logan. “Call me Tempest. And you are?”

Logan smiled at the use of Virgil’s last name. He felt like he should at least reciprocate. “Adstrum.”

Virgil smirked. “Glory. Immortality.” He gives Logan a once-over before practically purring. “Divinity.”

Logan blushed at the implications. “I’m sure my parents meant ‘star’ when they named me.”

Virgil laughed before his expression darkened. “So, how much is he paying you?”

Logan put on a faux-innocent expression, but on the inside it felt like his blood had turned to ice. Mr. Sanders specifically said that Virgil couldn’t know about Logan unless absolutely necessary. Logan thought he’d been subtle and inconspicuous. “Who is paying me, exactly?”

Virgil sighed. “My father. Look, you almost fooled me at first. If I wasn’t always watching my back, you would’ve fooled me. But nobody ever visits this cafe because their coffee’s shit.” He gestured to Logan’s tea. “And I’m guessing the tea is too judging by how much you face screws up when you drink it. You could’ve been just a regular customer, but I’ve seen you at the library and the park, and I don’t doubt that you were at the record store too. And the people around here get really gossipy, so I knew that you were only here on the days that I showed up.” He leaned back in his chair, a smirk on his face. “So I’ll ask again: how much is he paying you?”

Logan looked him in the eye before sighing. “Too much to say no.” He carefully folded up his crossword puzzle. “Though I’m quite uncertain as to why this job exists in the first place. You obviously have no intention on running away again-”

“Running away?” Logan looked up to see Virgil confused and slightly angry. But Logan had dealt with enough people to see the acting for what it really was. “I was kidnapped and held against my will!”

Logan scoffed. “Kidnapped?” He straightened his tie as he spoke. “You disappeared in the middle of the night from a building whose security rivals the White House. There was no sign of struggle, nor was there a ransom note. Either your kidnapper was an extremely intelligent individual who wanted more than just money from Mr. Sanders, or you left on your own free will. And judging by my observations and personal experience, I’m inclined to believe the latter.”

Virgil stared for another moment before laughing. “Well, would you look at that! You’ve got a brain to match your bark. And I assume you bite, too. Because there’s no way you’re some random civilian. So, what’s your real job?”

Logan coughed. “I must admit, I’m not used to having my job description be, ‘keep client alive. ’”

Virgil blinked, and Logan suddenly felt like he’d said something wrong. “You stressed the word alive. ” Now it was Logan’s turn to blink. “You wouldn’t need to stress it unless there was something specific about keeping them alive.” His eyes suddenly lit up. “Are you an assassin?!”

Logan blushed. “Essentially. But now I am your bodyguard.”

Virgil vibrated in his seat. “How many people have you killed? Do you usually kill good people or bad people? Or does it only depend on the money? I wouldn’t blame you for that. The economy sucks.”

Logan chuckled. “I mainly target corrupt politicians and gang leaders. I turn down any jobs that involve families or children.”

Virgil mouthed the words ‘corrupt politicians and gang leaders’ before gasping. “Do you know Logan Croft?”

Logan blinked. “How do you know that name?”

Virgil gasped again, stars in his eyes. “Are you Logan Croft?” Logan decided to nod his head. Virgil already knew about his job, and his father was paying Logan. It wouldn’t hurt to give out his name, just this once. “Oh my gosh, you’re the guy who killed Jacob Smith four years ago! How did you do it? They say he was impenetrable behind his gang and-” Suddenly his phone ringed. “One moment, please.” He pressed the phone up to his ear, and Logan could hear his boss’ muffled voice on the other end, though he couldn’t understand what he was saying. “Hey, Dad. Yeah, I’m at a cafe. Yeah, I can come home for lunch. See you then. Bye.” He turned back to Logan with a grimace. “Sorry, I’ve gotta go. Maybe we can have a full conversation next time?”

Logan nodded. “I ask that you don’t tell Mr. Sanders about our conversation, or that you know about having a bodyguard. I’m afraid he might fire me if you do.” Or expose me to the world.

Virgil nodded. “Of course!” He stood there awkwardly for a moment. “Well, you know where I am… see ya, bye!” And with that, Virgil walked out of the cafe. Logan waited a few minutes before following. It was just to make sure that Virgil got home safe. It was part of his job, after all. It wasn’t because he found Virgil interesting and funny and cute-

Logan frowned, shaking away the thought. He would not get attached to Virgil. It would only serve as a cruel reminder of Roman. Roman and Logan had met in middle school and dated for several years. But Roman had fallen in love with another man a few years ago. And while Logan is polyamorous, it was dangerous enough to be attached to one civilian. So, they broke up on friendly terms. Logan had never felt so… empty, after leaving Roman. It had felt like Roman had taken Logan’s ability to be happy. Logan hadn’t fully smiled or laughed since their breakup…

Except for today, when he’d talked to Virgil. Virgil reminded Logan of Roman. He was charismatic, sarcastic, and funny. And with every butterfly that formed in Logan’s belly, a new knife stabbed him through the heart. Being with Virgil would only remind Logan of what he could no longer have with Roman. So, Logan would keep his distance (even if he could no longer do so literally).

---------------------------------------------------

When Virgil got home that day, he had a brief lunch with his father before retreating to his room for the day. Once he got there, he immediately pulled his phone out of his pocket and started texting his boyfriend.

V- (3:05 PM) Hey, your ex’s name was Logan Adsrum Croft, wasn’t it?

R- (3:06 PM) Yeah, why?

V- (3:06 PM) Guess who my hot new bodyguard is ;)

#sanders sides #AU_gust_2020 #bodyguard au #analogince #logan sanders #patton sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders

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ayellowcurtain · 3 years

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I think the unsatifactory aspects of OHN was actually a persistent issue for all, if not most, of the Sobbe reunions. Wtfock loves highend drama, but they dont have the ability to enhance their writing to meet the increased intensity. They would succeed if they played it safe and worked within the range of their writer's capabilities. Keep it simple and stick to the OGs frame work, but with an added flare of originality. That's what they did with the flatshare and it worked out so well

If we’re talking about the general issues, I would say WTFock likes to make their lives harder. Because I don’t think their writing is that bad (not saying is good either, but it’s okay...) when they have their A team working on the show. Their main problem is the complete lack of understanding of how much planning can go a long way, especially in a project like SKAM where every detail has a meaning.

It feels like they write their scripts, their main plan with the season and they just go with it, and change things they consider “smaller” as the season in already airing. Social media content, trigger warning, special dates, times, etc, etc. So then when the time comes and they have nothing ready, they have to improvise on the spot and that’s when things go bad.

The social media is often considered as extra content for the teams behind the remakes I feel like and not as part of the clips and the story telling. The clips and social media posts, private messages work together, one to enrich the other and its meanings. Like I gave as an example a few days ago, messages between Yasmina and her brother, or between her and the girls would give us an insight through Yasmina’s POV how with things that we already saw through other people’s eyes (her talking about the boy she might like with Robbe during WTFock Down, with her leaving the zoom call with everyone during WTFock Down, etc, etc). Like the Valentine’s Day posts, like the Mental Health posts, the possible Ramadan ones, etc.

None of those have nothing to do with the writing directly, but it would give more depth to it, it would put us deeper inside the main’s POV and help with the pacing, with building up anticipation or with putting an end to some concerns - like they did after Robbe’s clip when he saw Sander and Britt back together. We got an insta post - if I’m not mistaken - and a quick talk with Jens to assure the viewers that Robbe was okay.

And it’s something so easy to fix but that WTFock isn’t willing to admit they lack on. When sitting down to plan the season, to read the script with the whole team (writing, directing, producing, social media team - this doesn’t include the cast if they don’t wanna have the extra work of finding a time where everyone can meet to talk about these things) they should consider these details too.

They should read what the clips will have, when they’ll post them, talk if trigger warnings are needed, talk about pacing, PLAN THE SOCIAL MEDIA WITH THE SCRIPT. Once that’s out of the way and they wanna be extra careful, maybe sit down with their mains (and their LI or the person that will be like constantly around the main) and show them what the schedule is, what they have planned for the main social media because the actors also have an idea of how their characters are, so I think it would be a nice touch if they had a saying in what they would post or not - this is not necessary, again, and I understand their cast has a million other things to do these days. But they didn’t have it when WTFock started and if this was the way WTFock did since day one, the cast would already be used to their way of filming and they wouldn’t need much time to tackle these “small” details while on set.

Have a social media person on set - if your budget is small and your social media team is one single person that possible too if you plan ahead and let them have their schedule with when they need to be on set and what they have to do while there - between shoots, grab one or two cast members, pull them aside for a minute to take some pictures. While they’re filming, take some photos because not every post a teenager will do on their social media is perfect, it can be blurry, and messy and make very little sense. This is just some examples, but during the Sander x Robbe x Milan scene playing game, take a picture of Robbe and Sander like it’s from Milan’s POV, take a picture from Robbe’s POV of Milan and Sander playing the game. During Zoe’s season, while they’re there, pretending to be sleeping in bed, take picture like it’s from Zoe’s POV, or Senne’s. It doesn’t take too much time, it doesn’t change the writing but it gives more depth and more spontaneousness to the posts, makes it feel more organic.

And then we come back to OHN, if you planned this clip to happen on a Monday, first of all, give us Robbe’s messages that Sander reads but doesn’t answer, give us missed calls. With that, you are not changing your writing but you :

1 - calms the viewers’ nerves while keeping them just anxious enough, because people were about to fly to Belgium trying to understand where the fuck did Robbe went rushing after the clip ended if not to find Sander.

2 - give us more depth and more anxiety because we now know that Robbe is looking but not finding him. We know where Robbe is and what he’s doing without seeing it. And we’re still desperate to know where Sander is. You’ll would throw the fandom into a hunt, desperate for the next clip, checking every stories you post on WTFock’s page in hopes for it to be the next clip.

3 - give us a tiny redemption arc to Britt if she is texting Robbe, trying to help him guess where Sander is.

4 - give us even a little bit of Robbe x Yasmina! If she’s the one that Robbe reaches out when he’s desperate because he looked everywhere and he can’t find Sander!

Do you see how much build up we could have without changing the main writing process, without taking time from clips, without changing their set schedule?

My main issue with WTFock is their lack of a needed effort covering all their bases to make their writing go from average to good.

#not sure if I made sense anon

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