#please don’t define this actor by his looks. he’s clearly a lot more than that

[simplysummers]

It’s really funny to me that some Sebastian-antis are like “people only like Sebastian because he’s hot 😡.” or “people only like Sebastian because it’s Grant Gustin/The Flash 😤.”

Because:

I find that really disrespectful towards Grant himself. It’s like a backhanded compliment: oh people only like this character of yours because you’re good looking, or because you’ve played a nicer role elsewhere? Not because you put in the hard work to bring this villainous gay teen to life? Not because you’re talented and your wicked quips have charm and likability despite the fact you’re playing a villain/grey anti-hero? No sir, just because you’re ‘hot’, nothing else.

But it’s also discrediting the actual likability of the character anyway. Sebastian is perceived as a bad guy, yes, but we did get a few different layers to him, especially if you watch his background moments closely, that then sets out a foundation to help pull apart different aspects of his character, take what you like, and work with/enjoy it. And you know what else? For glee standards, he’s also just pretty dang funny. For all of the newer Sebastian Smythe stans, you don’t need any excuse or reason to like this character, just like you don’t need an excuse as to why you like Santana, Puck, Finn, or Rachel, or anyone for that matter. It doesn’t need to be justified because it’s GG or Barry Allen, you’re allowed to just like him because its Sebastian, and this is coming from somebody who was acquainted with glee long before the flash or Grant Gustin as a person.

#yknow what I’m sure there are some Seb stans who only like him because of the actor but I’m speaking for the majority I like to think #it’s like when people see pictures of Sebastian and go ‘oh yeah it’s Grant’ I don’t do that? do other people do that? #like no that’s Sebastian to me. most of his photos are Sebastian to me #doesn’t mean I’m discrediting his other works because i think he’s a talented icon #but yeah. Sebastian comes to my mind long before the actor or the infamous Barry Allen #glee #sebastian smythe #grant gustin #Bea’s getting braver with her opinions everyone /lh #the fact that Grant is able to make Sebastian likeable proves how versatile and talented he is #it’s got nothing to do with his looks. I think he’s very attractive but that plays no role in how much I like the character #please don’t define this actor by his looks. he’s clearly a lot more than that #same with the flash actually. I’ve seen 3 seasons of the flash now. and he’s amazing in it. but is *he* the flash? no. he’s Grant. and he #does other things too. #like him for what you want but please stop making the entire personality of his fans centred around the flash. some of us just like #spicy slushy throwing Sebastian #also tbh what would actually be wrong if people did like Sebastian because Grant is the flash #like as long as you can respectfully notice they’re different character and GG is his own person you can like these characters for whatever #you want. like I said you don’t need a reason or justification #you like him because he’s Barry Allen? nice. cool. welcome to the thunderdome #Glee’s Gossip: By Summer

[tomwambsmilk]

brenna i'm sorry to tell you it was nicholas braun who said greg was 'on the side of morality in the show' and sparked all the recent discourse. https://theplaylist.net/succession-nicholas-braun-on-gregs-turn-to-the-dark-side-interview-20220617/

NAUR…….. this is why I don’t read actor interviews 😭😭😭😭😭😭

...... However. I have had an essay kicking around my drafts about the succ characters and how they approach morality for a while that interview + this discourse has reminded me it exists, so I'm gonna drop a little bit of it here. Because, while I do think "Greg is on the side of morality" is.... wrong, objectively speaking, it's very interesting to me that Nich Braun thinks that, and I wonder how much of this is "Nich Braun is kind of stupid" and how much of it is "he's speaking from the perspective of how Greg perceives himself". (If it is actually the second it is atrociously worded though... Please sir I am begging you to think before you speak.) But I'm going to assume more of the second just because if that's the case it reveals some really interesting things about how Greg understands morality and this is something I've been thinking about for a while.

TL:DR; Greg is NOT a moral centre and if Nich Braun actually genuinely thinks that he's insane. However, its very plausible to me that Greg thinks of himself as a moral centre, and if so the specific context Nich Braun is talking about here is incredibly revealing as to what Greg's moral decision-making framework looks like.

[Also re: the whole "Shiv can be a real bitch" thing... That line absolutely grates on my soul because it is a massive oversimplification. I do understand what he was trying to say having seen it in context though. Still an incredibly shitty word choice.]

Anyways. Before we dig into questions of "how moral are the characters" there's a much bigger looming question of "what is morality" and more specifically "what do the characters think it means to be a moral person" and "do they think morality is a useful decision-making framework". If I had to characterize Greg's approach to morality, I think I'd probably describe it as 'cosplaying morality'. I think he knows that he should be a good and moral person, in some sort of abstract sense, but he doesn't really know what that means, so he ends up with these broad-strokes statements like "I'm against racism" that are clearly pulled from very surface-level cultural discourse, and maybe whatever Ewan rants he's absorbed over the years. He also defines morality as things you shouldn't do, rather than things you should - don't be racist, don't lie if you're the news (which are much easier standards to fulfill than a moral standard that requires some sort of positive action). On the flipside, though, he struggles to apply any sort of objective moral standard to his actual day-to-day interactions with people. He doesn't really agonize over the moral quality of his decisions beyond the move to ATN. I do think he perceives himself as a moral actor, but in practice it's more hitting the talking points that he sees "good people" hitting.

I think he also has a really cartoonish image of what "bad people" are, which is part of why he jumps to the defence of Waystar in conversations with Ewan. Yeah a lot of that is very self-serving. But I think in his mind bad people are cartoonishly bad, and most of his day-to-day interactions with these people are.... not that, actually. When it's bad it's really bad, but there's also the fact that he spent about 8 months in Parks with Tom in Season 1 where nothing noteworthy enough to make it into an episode script happened, so I'd wager most of the day-to-day is probably... just a mundane corporate job to him. This might sound kind of crazy, but unfortunately I have actually seen this play out in real life with grown-ass adults, who get so stuck on "well x is a good/friendly/pleasant person most of the time, or to me personally, so no way they could be a bad person, and those bad things they did do were probably misunderstood, or maybe it was bad but they had good reasons, etc". That's a very convenient stance for Greg to take, but it's not beyond the bounds of reason in my mind that he actually believes it on some level.

And the specific context of this quote talking about Tom and Shiv tells us a few things. For one thing, he's defining being a moral actor in this specific situation as advocating for Tom and encouraging him to leave Shiv for the sake of his own personal well-being. Which is FASCINATING to me because (again assuming that he's speaking from a Greg headspace here) it indicates that for Greg being a moral actor is rooted a lot in the personal relationship. He's looking at everything that happened and going "well, whatever makes Tom happiest is probably morally good, and the right thing for me to do as his friend is to support that". Additionally, in his mind Tom's choice is justifiable because Shiv makes him miserable (and specifically because she makes him miserable by "being kind of a bitch" which... I do love Shiv and that's a massive oversimplification but its also not altogether inaccurate I guess). So there's also an element of comeuppance there in his worldview; a sense of "well, Shiv got what was coming to her". And finally, it indicates that for Greg loyalty isn't really a moral concept. There's no moral imperative in his mind for Tom to stay loyal to Shiv or to the Roy family as a whole, if doing so is detrimental to him personally.

So in the end it kind of circles back to the last two seasons of interviews where Nich's emphasized that Greg is doing what he does out of a sense of survival. I think there's an implication that he's turned survival into his moral framework. He's looking at everything going on with Tom and Shiv and saying "it's morally justifiable for Tom to do whatever he needs to in order to get into a better situation". Obviously, the massive problem with this worldview is that it's incredibly easy to abuse. And that's kind of what's happened with Greg - he went from being slimy in kind of a sympathetic way bc he was struggling to being slimy in a self-serving way incredibly quickly. And I think it also explains why his "principles" are almost cartoonishly broad - being "against racism" and "don't lie if you're the news" are unlikely to interfere with his ability to pursue what's best for him and the people he's close to. (I think part of the reason the move to ATN is so distressing for him is that it undermines his ability to say 'well I'm a good person because I don't do x' because now he is in fact involved in x'.)

It's also interesting that he doesn't extend this to Shiv - there's no sense of "well Shiv is entitled to do whatever she needs to in order to better her position". Maybe he doesn't perceive her actions as being to better her position, so it doesn't fall under that category. Or maybe for him a lot of it is rooted in that personal relationship he has with Tom - Tom is his friend and so Tom is the one he has a moral obligation towards, rather than Shiv. Or more likely - a combination of both, because its also very plausible to me that consciously or unconsciously Greg, who is so desperate for friendship and connection that he's spent almost a year putting up with Tom's abuse to get it, would make "I have some form of substantial connection to this person" a significant deciding factor in the extent of his moral obligation. Also a deeply problematic moral framework, because it obviously makes it morally acceptable to mistreat people you aren't close to. (Although at the same time I think most people do factor personal relationships into their moral decision-making in the sense that we feel that friends and family are owed more than strangers, but that's a separate topic.)

I have theories as to why Greg is like this, and the biggest one is that I think he was fairly neglected as a kid - maybe not physically, but Marianne doesn't seem like she was a super engaged parent, probably, and kids who are raised with excessively hands-off parents often don't have great moral frameworks, because a big part of learning to be a moral person is your parents implementing and enforcing rules and consequences that teach you how to be a moral person in your day-to-day actions, as well as explaining why certain things are right and wrong. I expect that's not something that Greg really had growing up, hence the broad cartoonish notions of morality he'd ended up with.

#sorry to answer this with essay you absolutely didn't ask for ming.... #I'm too obsessed with my own thoughts and opinions for my own good #I realize I might be giving nich braun too much benefit of the doubt here too #in assuming he intended this as being more from greg's perspective as opposed to an objective statement #but the concept of someone thinking greg is 'on the side of morality' is SO insane to me that I'm like.... he can't just straight-up #believe that. right? #but maybe he is just stupid or insane. idk #anyways I also have thoughts on the other five main characters and morality but that's for another post I think. I have some restraint #a bare minimum of restraint

[sprinklesandshatters]

A Review on NCT 127′s 3rd Album <Sticker>

So NCT 127 just came back with their 3rd Full Album <Sticker> and this is my first 127 comeback since I became a fan last year! Neozone is such a special album for me as it was their first album that I explored entirely. I've known NCT as the group who never fails any expectations so I've kept mine up although I know they'll exceed it anyway. And guess what, they did! I absolutely love their new album hence this review~

This isn't a technical music review—as I am not a musician myself—but rather a listener's honest takes, goofy notes, and interpretation on each of the tracks in the album. I admit I've also struggled to build my own opinions on some of the tracks until I listened to them over and over again.

I have also heard there are mixed opinions on the title track <Sticker> and a lot says it's another acquired taste. But I think it's not just that, as it can be a grower, just like how most of NCT's songs were for me. Maybe after a few listens and a right passage of time, it will grow on those people. The bottom line here is, I like it a lot! 😛

So I listed down the songs according to their respective track numbers and followed each with a bulleted list of my opinions and interpretations.

(Viewer/reader discretion: before you continue, minors, do not interact as there are few 18+ contents under the cut. Thank you.)

1. Sticker

THEY DIDN'T JUST PUNCH A NEW NOTCH ON THE BELT LIKE THAT

THIS SONG SLAPS, LITERALLY SLAPS… AND WHIPS 

The recorder at the intro boyyyy I thought something was wrong but then I remember it’s NCT lmao

It already stuck in my head from my first listen from the Instagram audio.

With Taeyong opening the verse with his divine rapping, I knew I'm in for a new ride.

STICK-UH STICK-UGH STICK-UGHGHGH

To those complaining it sounding like noise music, imagine it sounding generic. I don't think it would fit as the title track. Not a b-track or in their repertoire, even. They are called NCT because they define the NEO in the music culture and music technology!

It honestly was an unorthodox, just like all of their title tracks, which I’m inherently here for.

Literally, no one does it like them!

The growls and the vocal flexes and adlibs! (You can tell it has Yoo Youngjin's brand.)

The crisp metronome sound that’s consistently ticking except for the pre-chorus and the dance break adds depth to the soundscape. I love how it’s used instead of the usual snaps.

The production quality blew my mind. Like how can someone think those melodies would sound so exquisite? CAN I CALL THEM GENIUS?

The piano at the back, oh my God—Yes! It adds this mystifying element to the song.

I'm not sure if it's a midi violin at the pre-chorus, but it added thrill to the song. It was a great transition from the bass line in the verses to the combination of the flawless harmony with the same instrumental.

"You treat me like a boy, like a grown-up child chasing a dream" JUNGWOO BABY NO MORE HUH

Taeil, Doyoung, and Haechan—the bridge vocal trinity!

But why the heck are they cowboys? I dig the concept, but why? LMAO

BTW GUNSLINGER MARK I’M ON MY KNEES YEEHAW

This is easily one of my favorite tracks from NCT 127's entire discography 💚

2. Lemonade

(⌐■_■)

Jaehyun starting off this song with his deep voice eee

The song opens to a verse oozing with chill confidence. They're like, yeah you're lurking because we’re cool.

This is such a huge slap to their haters. NCT's not chillin' like a villain, nah they're the main characters!

Well maybe they’re villains, but still ya not cooler than them ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Funny enough how they could have just referred haters as simply lemons whose sour/bitter to the taste, but 127 squad's success is sweeter than all the haters' spiteful remarks so yeah, SIPPY SIPPY LEMONADE 🧃

"WOOF"

I might have just barked too wOW

Yuta’s vocals hooooO his voice just sounds so glamorous mhmm

Also Mark referencing their previous title tracks such as: Firetruck, Cherry Bomb, and Regular (it's Irregular in the lyrics) in his rap part 👌💅

I just love Mark's energy when he raps. HE RESOLUTELY BITES AND STRAIGHT UP EATS EVERY TIME HE DOES.

3. Breakfast

Now breakfast time, oh jeez!

AAAHAHFU—

Summer 127's bestie!

If Summer 127 talks about dancing all night long, Breakfast is the morning after.

You know what it is.

"Even if I gulp and drink you, it's not enough for me." oho Taeyong no you ha—STOP

Sexual innuendos aside, isn't it just sweet if someone tells you they'd want to have breakfast with you every day?  Okay maybe I'm melting at the thought 😩🙈💞

And I can see myself dancing to this song as I make breakfast (in the afternoon or at midnight bc I’m crazy)

This was an okay b-track for me at the first skim on the album, but boy it grew on me wildly.

Honestly one of my favorite tracks in this album.

4. Focus

Did I just invade a private call? LMAO

The analog voice filters make it like so.

Dude, this feels intimate in the level of eavesdropping a phone call between seasoned lovers. Then you realize you hear them whispering their kinks over the line and you're ooh, that's sexy! hfgklhfhf

My first listen to this, I almost went feral because,

"I can't wait to eat you…" when it's actually "I can't wait 'til we chill…" aahaha

"Baby call me when you want me." OKAY!

This sounds relaxing and chill. I'd love to play this on a late night drive or just before bed time along with Fly Away With Me, Sun & Moon, My Youth, and Long Flight.

Belongs to ‘make out session’ playlist  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

That was lowkey a playlist recommendation, huh?

I'd be kidding if I don't say I could touch myself while listening to this song AHAHAFGHFJFJ

I didn't know this would grow on me this much lol I love love LOVE THIS!

5. The Rainy Night

Ooh, the holy melancholy!

Piano at the intro—I knew I'd cry to this.

This song isn't just about break-up, but the heartbreak after one.

The yearning; the remnant pieces from the shattering of what was once there.

I think I crumbled from this one.

This hit so hard I felt like I fit in the shoes with the lyrics throughout the entire song.

What’s fascinating is I clearly forgot the title when I mentally said this sounds like a sad rainy day song from the first listen.

Something I’d turn up when it suddenly rains, just because I want to feel the blues.

Taeil and Haechan singing in lower register? I wanna cry :( they’re just one of the best vocalists in K-music industry right now.

Could have been also nice if they added Yuta to the vocals.

"My selfish heart who waits for you to come back," OKAY WHO HURT THEM?

And the fact that they sang it so good that it translated every ounce of the emotions well even before I looked up for English translations is the reason why I love this song too.

6. Far

Hmm… What the hell?! Do I like this? Wait...

Alright!

The jumpy vibe from the first verse to the pre-chorus set the mood for this song. It sounds merry and heavy. It was honestly too much to take until I’ve reached the chorus part.

Honestly, I think this song could fit NCT Dream better, as it gives off a vibe similar to Hello Future's b-tracks. If some credible source say this could have made HF’s track list, I might believe you too fast.

Also Dream’s Deja Vu where they go na nananananana na na na~

Playful yet confident! That’s what I mean!

As usual, the vocals are insane! Vocal flex from left to right!

I swear Jungwoo sounded a bit like Taemin at the second verse that I had to replay it hahaha

I love hearing Johnny as a vocalist! SM, how many signs do you need until you utilize his vocal talent???

Taeil's part where he sings, "go nuts, go nuts, 'til we go bust, go bust" IDEK BUT I SNORTED A LAUGH AT FIRST LISTEN HFCAHKFHK

Not my favorite, but still great though!

But wait it’s actually stuck in my head???

7. Bring The Noize

Yes, they never beat those noise music allegations

HERE'S SOME NOIZE, BITCHES

I love me some noisy percussions. AND THE BASS YO

This screams so much confidence!

The build up from the pre-chorus to the chorus—FIRE!

This song reminds me a lot of SuperM's Super Car, especially with the engine roar samples and the battle cry-like singing at the chorus.

JAEHYUN RAPPING? You mean Jaehyun the visual, the vocalist, the actor, the model, the funny dude, aka my everything?! (markie bb look pls look away for a moment)

THEY DELIVERED IT STRAIGHT FROM NEOCITY THAT'S SOME NCT MUSIC RIGHT THERE NO ONE DOES IT LIKE THEM

When I said I'd play Focus on a late night drive, and if I add this in the playlist, VROOM VROOM SPEED LIMIT WHAT

OUTTA MY WAY

“We got no shame” ouh TAEYONG’S FLOW IS JUST VERY HIM AND HE’S IN A LEAGUE OF HIS OWN

You know what's so clever about this song? It's how it ended with Mark's final rap without any instrumental, leaving you  standing there with a doppler effect-like post experience.

A super car on a super speed just whooshed past you and you look its way as it zips through the road. It's gone in an instant but you're floored dumbfounded at a sidewalk. That's how I describe this song.

8. Magic Carpet Ride

This song… Wow. Oh gosh it's so beautiful.

Their harmony in the chorus—it makes me want to kiss someone so passionately that I'd cry.

This makes me want to feel love that transcends the universe. Literally, just please take me on a magic carpet ride :(

The background harmonies too oh my goodness—HEAVENLY.

Jaehyun's voice is so warm and soulful it fits perfectly with songs of this genre.

Okay alright Doyoung Grande!

And Taeil makes me feel like I'm listening to old school R&B.

The first time I heard this from the track video, I can't stop replaying because it's just that great.

This makes me want to love. I think that sums it up.

9. Road Trip

This is such a soothing song for me, especially how I easily become nostalgic thinking about the road trips I've had.

Whenever I listen to this, my brain immediately conjures up thoughts of my ideal getaways. Gazing at the sky through the car window, stirring up from a nap in the middle of the ride, and   eventually reaching your destination.

Oh, to travel around anywhere... (curse you covid-19)

Okay that's it. I'M PACKING UP.

But where do I go—

I could also imagine Mark playing this on the guitar and the other members sing along together, something like that.

Just Wholesome™ vibes.

I love how it evokes such a nice emotion within me effortlessly.

This isn't my favorite, but I still love this.

10. Dreamer

Eyyyy such a refreshing song!

This song is so bright it makes me want to dance. I play this first in the shower!

It reminds me so much of Elevator (from Neozone)

The horns make it more lively I think!

Yuta and Jungwoo's voice suits lively songs like this.

The background vocal in low register in Taeyong's part in the first verse is so good ahhfhf

Taeil, the R&B vocal king you are...

There's this part where Doyoung and Johnny harmonized, that at first listen they seemed to clash, but it sounded actually fine after a few listens. Maybe it's just that I've never heard them do it before.

And I think it's Doyoung's laugh at the end of the bridge? Oh my goodness I really love this too!

11. Promise You

MY FIRST LOVE AND MOST FAVORITE SONG IN THE ALBUM!!!

The first time I heard this from their NCIT Sharehouse Sitcom, I fell in love with the song already.

It sounds like something you'd feel from a warm, welcoming hug.

The lyrics are so beautiful and endearing. It's definitely a be-there-for-you type of song that will touch your heart.

It definitely sounds like a promise.

A song about platonic intimacy.

This really fits to be the closing song of the album. It's like the end of it but holds a promise that says “see you soon.”

Because they cherish their fans like that.

It's also like I've watched a movie with a happy ending, where the camera pans up to the clear sky and this song starts playing.

Speaking of ending, I would love to hear them sing this as an encore stage in their concert. You know, that moment just before the stage lights die down at the end of the concert where they send final blows of flying kisses to NCTzens. Then you come home smiling and crying.

This wasn't supposed to be this long since I originally planned to write this with just simple phrases and emojis but I got too engrossed lol. I also meant to include my own ratings but I figured it’s pointless since I can’t really decide about them hahaha

I really enjoyed the whole album and I love how they're progressively defining what NEO means by breaking through standards. It's not NCT music if it doesn't make you say "WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?" But then you realize it’s stuck in your head and you’re enjoying it already.

✨ OVERALL RATING: 127/10 💚

if you’ve reached until here, thank you for letting me share you a braincell or two 💞

#this was too long oh goodness #idek if some of you will actually take interest to read all these blabbers but yeah #but it was fun listing these down hahaha #nct 127 #nct #sticker #sticker.talks #taeil #johnny #taeyong #yuta #doyoung #jaehyun #jung jaehyun #jungwoo #mark #mark lee #haechan #nct fluff #nct smut #nct reviews #long post

[shihalyfie]

Yamato, Adventure’s most dramatically emotional cast member

The “edgy cool bishounen rival” has been such a staple of shounen anime for years that the moment you look at Yamato and his position next to Taichi, it’s easy to go “ah, yep, there it is.” But just like how Taichi’s actually very different from the shounen hero stereotype, Yamato, despite what his first impression and character design might suggest, is in fact the complete opposite!

Actually, I’ll start this off with an interesting story from Yamato’s own voice actor, Kazama Yuuto:

Yeah. When my agent asked me which role I wanted to try out, I thought I couldn’t do a pretty boy character like him, so I was really astonished when I was chosen for the role. Afterwards, when I asked Kakudou-san [the director] about it, he said that he’d decided on me the instant I’d come in... I’d heard that Yamato was a cool character, which I thought was a part of him that didn’t agree with me. So there was that factor in the beginning. But I learned that he was actually quite similar to me, and a surprisingly passionate guy.

I don’t generally have a huge tendency to include voice actor comments in analysis about writing, but I do think it says a lot that even his own voice actor walked in expecting the typical “pretty boy rival” character to the extent that he felt he’d have difficulty doing the role at all, only for the actual nature of Yamato’s character to catch him off guard! Because, yeah, that really is the case: Yamato’s first impression really is very deceptive, and his actual personality is, indeed, full of open passion and emotion in nearly every way.

Yamato in Adventure

...No, really, it really does not take long for it to be very clear that Yamato’s immediately not like the stereotype his character archetype would suggest, considering that even as early as Adventure episode 2, he was depicted as very obviously being open about his opinions, even if that made him quick to criticize.

When you talk about “rival” characters, usually, the reason such characters seem cold and standoffish is that there’s a certain degree of pride to them, or, in other words, they want to keep up a facade of being “cool” and rational and thus aren’t quick to show their emotions. But Yamato isn’t like that at all! From the very beginning, he speaks often, is very open and honest about his thoughts, and doesn’t seem to even really care what others think at all.

The Adventure novels do, in fact, make clear that he was more closed-in prior to arriving in the Digital World, and these bursts of emotion were actually unusual behavior for him at the time -- but it’s not because he’s prideful or anything! Firstly, it wasn’t necessarily that he deliberately cut himself off from others -- rather, he was still willing to engage in some degree of friendly interaction:

It wasn’t because he was lonely. In fact, many of his classmates would greet him with a friendly “Yo!” or “Hi~!” when they came across him and, naturally, Yamato would respond back with a smile.

And, in fact, said novel indicates that there’s a lot going on deeper than him merely suppressing his emotions for the sake of it:

The people around Yamato may have thought that he was a cold, aloof person, but that was only because he didn’t show what he thought to other people. When had he become like that? He hadn’t been like that when he was younger. But after his parents decided to divorce and his mom took Takeru by the hand and left home… Don’t go! Please don’t go! Don’t leave me! The truth was, he had wanted to plead with her and cry — but he couldn’t. Part of it had to do with his father standing by his side. Maybe his mother had secretly wished for Yamato to say that to her. But at that moment, Yamato had thought that he would never show weakness in front of his mom, even if he died from it. It was his own decision to follow his dad. Ever since coming to the Digital World, even Yamato was surprised by how much emotion he expressed. All of the emotion that he’d held back while at home, at school, had come bursting out without pause.

It’s also important to understand the reasons why he blows up so easily at Taichi in Adventure episodes 3 and 6 and whatnot -- he does it because he’s constantly looking out for the others and worried about their welfare. Pretty much all of the arguments he has with Taichi for the majority of the series involve him objecting to his perception of Taichi as insensitive, because Taichi has a tendency to tease others or bid for everyone to keep pushing forward into dangerous situations or when they’re tired. So, really, Yamato gets angered and emotional and picks his fights with Taichi because he cares too much, not because he’s deliberately trying to cultivate an image of being detached. Once they were outside the range of his family and their classmates and stranded in another world, Yamato’s bleeding heart instantly won out, and he started advocating for the welfare of everyone else.

This is why Yamato’s the one who gets the Crest of Friendship, because even though he starts off by putting up a defensive wall between himself and the others and seems very difficult to deal with, even when he gets angry and upset, he’s constantly upset on other people’s behalf. Even from the very beginning of the series, he’s actually one of the most caring people in the cast!

Really, the entire first few introductory episodes with Yamato can be pretty succinctly described as Yamato coping really badly with all those years of emotional suppression and letting it out in some pretty severe outbursts, especially when it comes to Takeru, whom he’d never been able to properly take care of as an older brother due to their parents’ divorce. (And while he’s definitely a little better at managing it, Takeru himself is actually also doing a pretty bad job with that whole emotional suppression and lack of catharsis thing.) Standoffish and cold? Nah -- not when Yamato has the single highest count of openly breaking down and crying out of the whole cast in Adventure.

And, for all it’s worth, remember that stereotypical “cold rival” characters in this kind of shounen series would normally be very ashamed at others seeing them so emotional, but Yamato...doesn’t really seem to care about the others seeing him do some really embarrassingly reckless stuff during his episodes of exploding over Takeru’s welfare. Once it’s past him, he doesn’t really dwell on it and moves on. Again: Yamato isn’t the kind of person who actually cares that much about what other people think of him.

Adventure episode 18 is an often-overlooked episode when it comes to Yamato, but it’s significant because it makes it clear that he doesn’t really have a problem being conversational and friendly with others (especially since, remember, any emotional suppression had more to do with the trauma and sensitive feelings surrounding his parents’ divorce and a desire to not show weakness) -- he starts a very lighthearted, friendly chat with Koushirou over why they’re looking for their Crests, and even admits that the reason he wants his own Crest is that he’s self-conscious about the idea of everyone else changing and improving as people while he gets left behind. That’s a really personal thing to admit, and arguably something very sensitive! It’s something you wouldn’t even blame him for potentially being self-conscious about! But he’s perfectly humble in admitting that this is something he wants to improve in, and carries on this entire conversation in a light-hearted, cheerful manner.

This episode takes place during a time where everything seems to be “safe” (they’re within Piccolomon’s barrier and finally have a proper place to sleep), and are on the verge of finding their own Crests in a situation that does not ostensibly involve running for their lives, so this is when you get to see Yamato in a relaxed situation. And, really, he’s very friendly and open, with no restraint about it. He really isn’t the kind of person to be condescending or cold by nature!

It’s even more incorrect to pin Yamato as someone who tries to act more on rationality (again, like the “cold rival” stereotype would suggest) because, in fact, he’s the kind of person who gets completely carried away by his own caring for others to the extent of irrationality. For instance, in Adventure episode 23 when his conflicting loyalties to Takeru versus wanting to help Jou in his situation get all mixed up, and he tries to buy into PicoDevimon's trick to turn Jou against him as a solution to taking sides before Jou clearly indicates this is the case, and Yamato doesn't hesitate to feel really bad about it. Openly so. Condescension? Nah.

No, really, I could just keep taking screenshots from Adventure all day if you want evidence of “Yamato is openly and passionately emotional to explosive degrees because he cares too much about others, and makes no real pretense of hiding it.” If you’re still not convinced, I don’t know what to tell you.

When Yamato infamously succumbs to Jureimon’s bait in Adventure episode 44 and ends up picking a fight with Taichi -- possibly his most self-centered action in the entire series -- it’s interesting to see that Jureimon does use the word “rival”, the same word used in anime trope lingo to describe “the person you’re constantly fighting with and competing with in order to improve yourself”. The reason why this is fascinating is that Adventure is making a point here that this kind of “stereotypical anime rival” relationship would be extremely unhealthy for these characters.

No, really: at least as far as Yamato’s concerned, and what defines the kind of “friendship” these particular kids need, what these kids need is mutual emotional support, not engineered conflict that can be passed off as “they fight but it’s a sign of how much they know each other!” Remembering that Adventure is, in many ways, a series that prioritizes wanting to focus on portraying the intimate nature of human behavior, it’s not surprising that it goes out of its way to make clear that centering your relationship with a friend around needing to “outdo” them is a really bad thing. (Observe how 02′s Daisuke and Ken also don’t fit the “rivals” archetype at all and are merely a straightforward relationship of best friends in little to no conflict, despite occupying the stereotypical position.)

But Jureimon successfully digs into all of Yamato’s insecurities about his perceived lack of self-improvement and his tendency to compare himself to the polar-opposite Taichi in terms of Taichi’s charisma and way of (ostensibly) playing better to Takeru’s dislike of being coddled. And so, the engineered conflict happens, and, of course, it traumatizes everyone around them. When Yamato finally manages to get over himself after some timely intervention from “the one who seeks stability” (Homeostasis) in Adventure episode 45, everyone in the group is miserable from the ordeal.

Adventure episode 51 basically lays down the two major issues Yamato had been facing up until that point, and ties it into a neat bow: the reason Yamato had become so obsessed with self-improvement was because he wanted to prove he was "independent" and "not weak", but in the end, he still sees himself as an inferior person compared to everyone else -- culminating in him eventually seeing Taichi as a better person than him. Gabumon reaches out to Yamato by clarifying Yamato’s right to not compete, but be unique; it’s not about competing or being a “better” or “worse” version of others, it’s finding his important niche in the group or in the world with the things only he’s good at. Yamato says it in explicit words in Two-and-a-Half Year Break:

Dad doesn’t remember. On the day when we had to decide whether Takeru or I would go with him… Neither Dad or Mom could decide, so I did. I thought, this way, Takeru would be able to stay with Mom. I chose for myself. And after that, I always chose for myself. Or that’s what I’d planned to. Even though I was called a Chosen Child, it was me who was going to choose what to do. No way was I going to be used for other people’s convenience. Maybe that’s why I went so far to keep myself from making friends. But in the end, I acknowledged that what I was doing was unreasonable. After all, I’m not living in this world by myself. If I hadn’t met Gabumon, I never would have realized that. The person I am right now, is not alone.

As long as Yamato only ever sees himself as a replaceable piece meant to fill in the same niches as everyone else, he’ll continue to be horribly critical of himself for not being a perfect person and ultimately being “useless” or “not necessary”. But it’s not about being perfect or a better or worse replacement, it’s about embracing himself and what he can do in his own way, and, indeed, at the end of the episode, Yamato’s arrival on the scene makes it clear that the group ultimately needs both of them, not just one.

It’s also interesting in that, whereas most of the kids (especially in the Adventure finale) are very open about their own feelings to their own partners, Yamato and Gabumon are capable of “communicating” in some sense just by Yamato playing the harmonica. But it’s perhaps because Yamato is normally so open and passionate about his own feelings that such a tacit method is something they can do -- they’ve already bared themselves to each other so many times already, that in the end, all they need to do is just enjoy the abstract things together.

Yamato in 02 and after

So by the time we get to 02, any trace of coldness or detachment from Yamato has completely vanished.

I cannot emphasize this enough: completely vanished. Even in the middle of being a heartthrob for the teenagers in school thanks to his good looks and work with his band, he’s open and lacking in condescension whatsoever, and it’s basically like seeing the openly friendly Yamato from Adventure episode 18 for a whole series. Actually, it already says a lot that he’s in a band, considering it feels like shifting his music activities to a full-on band is there to make a deliberate statement that Yamato is now much better at socializing and working in organized groups now -- it’s a far cry from having to work solo or independently, and it’s significant that “the person who wanted to be able to do everything by himself” is now interested in doing something a bit more cooperative. (And to lend further to the idea he’s sentimental and constantly thinks of others, his band, the TEEN-AGE WOLVES, is all but confirmed to be named in indirect tribute to Gabumon.)

He’s open, conversational, makes a lot of silly faces throughout the series, and basically the only thing he has left that remotely resembles the “pretty boy rival” stereotype is that he’s deep in the aesthetic. But even then, you get the impression that he just does that because he genuinely likes it, not because he’s trying to be “cooler than you” or anything. And it’s easy to see why: Yamato, quite simply, got over himself. He stopped restraining himself all the time in his attempts to become a perfect person, and simply let himself loose to express himself how he wanted, and ultimately became a perfectly sociable and friendly person who’s now even popular at school!

Yamato’s punch on Taichi in 02 episode 10 is often taken as evidence that Taichi and Yamato embody the “rivals who constantly get in fights but are somehow still friends” trope, but this tends to avoid the actual context of the rest of the scene -- in fact, Daisuke himself rightfully points out that if Yamato had done this out of any actual anger or condescension, this would have been a really cruel thing to do to Taichi when he’s already going through so much. But Yamato’s not doing this out of resentment or condescension, he’s doing this for Taichi’s own sake to help him get out of his stupor, and the important part here is that he immediately holds out a hand to him afterwards. Or, in other words, this isn’t something they’re doing out of conflict, but out of communication, and it’s now at the point where Taichi understands Yamato’s intent, and Yamato knows that what he wanted to do would be conveyed to Taichi, without words.

That is why Taichi and Yamato are finally so close now: they understand each other’s feelings. They’re not competing with each other. They’re not resenting each other. They’re sympathetic and forgiving of each other, and they communicate, verbally or otherwise.

It’s followed by a scene in 02 episode 11 that’s also often construed as Taichi and Yamato advocating fighting as part of a healthy friendship, but, again, this omits context: they talk about their fighting in past tense! They’re referring as fighting having been part of the things they had to do to understand each other now, when they clearly aren’t in that kind of conflict anymore. The idea they’re espousing is that Daisuke and Takeru need to let out their feelings and have some catharsis if they want to truly understand each other (which is, indeed, how Taichi and Yamato eventually settled their differences) and hopefully get to a position of mutual understanding, instead of the others forcing them to have peace for the sake of peace and not letting their feelings get out on the table. (And, ultimately, Daisuke spends the rest of the episode thinking about Takeru’s position, and none of the 02 kids ever end up in this bad of a brawl for the rest of the series, yet manage to build a friendship in spite of that -- so, yes, the important part was that they had their feelings out in the open and got catharsis, not fighting in itself.)

Yamato also has an interesting role in the 02 drama CDs, including one entirely devoted to him (Letter). Said drama CD has quite a few things to note:

Gabumon says that Yamato being rather silent and not speaking up about what he’s thinking is unusual behavior for him.

As much as Yamato’s managed to do a better job opening up in general, he’s still suffering from extreme self-worth issues, considering himself as worthless if he’s not able to do anything for a girl in the hospital, even though it’s of course completely reasonable he can’t do much. Despite that, he continues to emotionally fixate on her welfare and basically self-flagellate and do a lot of pretty emotionally occupied things in the process.

Speaking of getting emotionally occupied, as much as he ends up snapping a bit at the people on the beach who keep annoying the hell out of him, he eventually feels so bad for the shaved ice seller that he forces himself to eat it just for him. (Even though it’s freezing.)

Yamato’s a really poetic person. Almost sappily so.

On top of that, Armor Evolution to the Unknown gives us an ever-so-slight glimpse of his dating life with Sora -- which, while he hadn’t been super-flagrant about, he also hadn’t been hiding either (he’s clearly willing to engage in a bit of PDA as per 02 episode 43), and, if the admittedly-kind-of-crack drama CD is to believed, he’s actually very emotionally passionate about his relationship to her, and very dedicated! Beyond just the (very sudden) passionate declaration of love to her in the middle of tap dancing, when Sora is found to have been worrying about him being cold lately, he immediately goes out of his way to try and make things right and prove his love...

Yamato’s initial appearance in Kizuna pretty much defines in a nutshell what his and Taichi’s relationship eventually turned out to be: they’re willing to banter because they’re comfortable with each other, but when it all comes down to it, they appreciate and trust each other deeply. Again, the point is that Yamato and Taichi are emotionally there for each other, considering that (even if he ribs Taichi a bit for it) Yamato’s willing to come all the way down to meet Taichi for late-night beer and talk to him through his emotional troubles.

And, yes, Yamato’s still there to be a concerned minder for Taichi and to make sure he doesn’t get too inconsiderate of what he’s doing -- but there’s no conflict over it, just the two of them balancing their necessary roles as part of the group and keeping each other in check. Again, as was made clear back in Adventure, it’s not about one person being more necessary than the other, it’s them both working together to fulfill their own roles.

As one of the central characters in the movie, Yamato’s also having an existential crisis of adulthood, and in his case, it’s that he’s playing everything too much by ear but isn’t really sure what he wants to commit to. He’s still enjoying music as a hobby, but it’s apparent he doesn’t want to commit to it as a career (which is, well, quite the common thing for those who have hobbies in middle school) -- and moreover, the novel indicates that it’s not bringing him happiness the way it used to. (The movie goes out of its way to depict Yamato feeling isolated with both a harmonica and a band, referencing that neither Adventure nor 02′s ways are doing it for him anymore.)

Beyond the motorcycle we see Yamato driving a few times in the movie, the official website profile makes it clear that this is one of his major new interests, and it’s presumably why he’s also attending an engineering school -- he can’t decide on a long-term goal, so he’ll at least experiment with the thing he likes. Yamato’s always been someone who thinks with emotions and feelings, so it fits him.

We also learn that he’s surprisingly studious, and is picking up some things that run contrary to his image (the glasses!), including the fact he seems to like school enough that he wants to do more school while he figures out what he wants to do. This is something that happens in real life for a certain kind of person in a career-based existential crisis -- as many people as there are who play very badly with educational structures, there are also people who rely very heavily on the structure of college or grad school basically handing you tasks to do on a plate, and find the job market to be scarier than staying within that bubble. It’s not too unreasonable to imagine that Yamato, who in certain ways has never really been the kind of person to assertively have an idea of “this is what I want to do!” and generally works by immediate feelings instead of long-term goals, would end up becoming that kind of person. As he says, it’s really just him trying to postpone the inevitable decision and get a grace period.

Since “shutting out one’s own partner (and therefore one’s own inner self)” is key to the cause of partner dissolution, Yamato’s way of it isn’t as direct as Taichi or Sora (who end up actively shutting out their partners in a bid to become an adult), but is most certainly there -- especially when he’s the one who drops a mocking line about the idea of bringing Gabumon to his school. (It’s not about whether it’s actually doable or not; it’s the fact that he laughs and scoffs at how stupid this is.) The fact he treats friends drifting apart as an “inevitable” thing, and eventually is shown very obviously to be keeping Gabumon out of the phone conversations (in stark contrast to the 02 quartet going out of their way to keep them involved on the other end) ultimately boils down to: neglect. Yamato’s coasting by on everything he likes, but it also means he’s just letting everything happen, instead of consciously pursuing things and passionately following things with gusto, the way he used to.

But we do see Yamato’s single-minded and passionate side come out again -- while Taichi shuts down and ruminates on what to do about his impending loss of Agumon, Yamato’s the one who desperately runs around trying to figure something out, recruiting the 02 quartet into it, losing sleep over it, and eventually having a passionate confrontation with Taichi as the climax approaches. (Note that this, again, is not a real conflict in nearly the same way the two of them would be spitting insults at each other all the way back in Adventure; it’s just the two baring their own feelings, and Yamato quickly accepts Taichi’s answer very easily because he, too, feels the same. Again: they’ve become very good at communicating.)

Yamato does eventually let Gabumon back into his periphery instead of neglecting him so much, and their final scene together in the movie involves them resuming their old method of tacit communication that they’d once shared together, with Yamato playing the harmonica. It’s a sign of Yamato finally embracing those things in the past that used to make him happy rather than cultivating an uncomfortable relationship with it just because he’d kicked it out of his career prospects, and ultimately coming to terms with what he likes and what makes him happy.

And speaking of career prospects...

The question of “why did Yamato become an astronaut?” is one that’s infamously weirded out people all over the globe because of how much it clashes with his image, and how much of a kind of “out-there” thing it is that had virtually no precedent whatsoever in Yamato’s prior hobbies. (Although, if you really think about it, space travel isn’t that huge of a hurdle as it sounds for a world like this where Digital Gates exist to bend space-time; you just send a probe with a Digital Gate link up there...) The original meta reason was, simply, that it was a holdover from one of the original ideas for the third Adventure series, in which they would be investigating forces that were obstructing evolution from space. (The original logical progression was that Adventure would have a threat from the Digital World, 02 a threat from the real world, so the theoretical third series would be space...) When you think about which of the original Tokyo Chosen Children would be the most likely to actively pursue this route, it actually is likely to be Yamato, given that Taichi is more of a person who’s an overall leader and coordinator, whereas Yamato, who’s much more up-front aggressive and openly passionate, would be more likely to want to tackle the situation with his own hands.

Kizuna -- or, more specifically, its novel -- offers another (and not mutually exclusive!) explanation:

While studying at graduate school, Yamato came up with a dream he had for his future. He wanted to study cosmology, and become an astronaut. The way there would not be easy. There was a whole mountain of things he’d have to do to get there. But Yamato had a certain ambition in mind. Someday, he was going to go to space with Gabumon. Whenever he thought of that future, Yamato was willing to do anything to get there.

Remembering that Yamato was at an engineering school (presumably originally from the motorcycles connection), it seems that he eventually “ran into” the career option by chance and happenstance, and thought about it and decided he wanted to follow it for the sake of going with Gabumon. It’s a very “romantic” and sappy kind of “out-there” dream, and, actually, that’s the point -- Yamato is a ridiculous romanticist, the kind of person who waxed about barbecue back in Adventure episode 6, and compared his relationship with Takeru to Hikoboshi and Orihime back in 02 episode 17, and spouted a bunch of poetic words at the sea during Letter. And, remember, he’s always been openly shameless and passionate about everything he’s felt and liked, and has never cared what other people would think.

And in the context of Kizuna, where Yamato was slowly losing touch with himself and his passions and eventually lost Gabumon as a result, it’s a very important sign that everything’s on its way back to healing, and that he’ll be able to achieve that future where they meet again.

#digimon #digimon adventure #digimon adventure 02 #digimon adventure last evolution kizuna #ishida yamato #yamato ishida #shihameta #kizuna spoilers

[xoruffitup]

Annette: The AD Devotee Review

So I saw Annette on its premiere night in Cannes and I’m still trying to process and make sense of those 2.5 hours of utter insanity. I have no idea where to begin and this is likely going to become an unholy length by the time I’m finished, so I apologize in advance. But BOY I’ve got a lot to parse through!!

Let’s start here: Adam’s made plenty of weird movies. The Dead Don’t Die? The Man Who Killed Don Quixote? There are definitely Terry Gilliam-esque elements of the unapologetically absurd and fantastical in Annette, but NOTHING comes close to this film. To put it bluntly, nothing I write in this post can prepare you for the eccentric phantasmagoria you’re about to sit through.

While the melodies conveying the story – at times lovely and haunting, at times whimsical, occasionally blunt and simple – add a unique sense of the surreal, the fact that it’s all presented in song somehow supplies the medium for this bizarre concoction of disparate elements and outlandish storytelling to all coalesce into a single genre-defying, disbelief-suspending whole. That’s certainly not to say there weren’t a few times when I quietly chortled to myself and mouthed “what the fuck” from behind my mask when things took an exceeding turn to the outrageous. This movie needs to be permitted a bit of leeway in terms of quality judgments, and traditional indicators certainly won’t apply. I would say part of its appeal (and ultimately its success) stems from its lack of interest in appealing to traditional arbiters of film structure and viewing experience. The movie lingers in studies of discomfiture (I’ll return to this theme); it presents all its absurdities with brazen pride rather than temperance; and its end is abrupt and utterly jarring. Yet somehow, at the end of it, I realized I’d been white-knuckling that rollercoaster ride the whole way through and loved every last twist and turn.

A note on the structure of this post before I dive in: I’ve written out a synopsis of the whole film (for those spoiler-hungry people) and stashed it down at the bottom of this post, so no one trying to avoid spoilers has to scroll through. If you want to read, go ahead and skip down to that before reading the discussion/analysis. If I have to reference a specific plot point, I’ll label it “Spoiler #___” and those who don’t mind being spoiled can check the correlating numbers in my synopsis to see which part I’m referencing. Otherwise, my discussion will be spoiler-free! I do detail certain individual scenes, but hid anything that would give away key developments and/or the ending.

To start, I’ll cut to what I’m sure many of you are here for: THE MUSICAL SEX SCENES. You want detailed descriptions? Well let’s fucking go because these scenes have been living in my head rent-free!!

The first (yes, there are two. Idk whether to thank Mr. Carax or suggest he get his sanity checked??) happens towards the end of “We Love Each Other So Much.” Henry carries Ann to the bed with her feet dangling several inches off the floor while she has her arms wrapped around his shoulders. (I maybe whimpered a tiny bit.) As they continue to sing, you first see Ann spread on her back on the bed, panting a little BUT STILL SINGING while Henry’s head is down between her thighs. The camera angle is from above Ann’s head, so you can clearly see down her body and exactly what’s going on. He lifts his head to croon a line, then puts his mouth right back to work. 

And THEN they fuck – still fucking singing! They’re on their sides with Henry behind her, and yes there is visible thrusting. Yes, the thrusting definitely picks up speed and force as the song reaches its crescendo. Yes, it was indeed EXTREMELY sensual once you got over the initial shock of what you’re watching. Ann kept her breasts covered with her own hands while Henry went down on her, but now his hands are covering them and kneading while they’re fucking and just….. It’s a hard, blazing hot R rating. I also remember his giant hand coming up to turn her head so he can kiss her and ladkjfaskfjlskfj. Bring your smelling salts. I don’t recommend sitting between two older ladies while you’re watching – KINDA RUINED THE BLATANT, SMOKING HOT ADAM PORN FOR ME. Good god, choose your viewing buddy wisely!

The second scene comes sort of out of nowhere – I can’t actually recall which song it was during, but it pops up while Ann is pregnant. Henry is again eating her out and there’s not as much overt singing this time, but he has his giant hands splayed over her pregnant belly while he’s going to town and whew, WHEW TURN ON THE AIR CONDITIONING PLEASE. DID THE THEATER INCREASE IN TEMPERATURE BY 10 DEGREES, YOU’RE DAMN RIGHT IT DID.

Whew. I think you’ll be better primed to ~enjoy~ those scenes when you know they’re coming, otherwise it’s just so shocking that by the time you’ve processed “Look at Adam eating pussy with reckless abandon” it’s halfway over already. God speed, my fellow rats, it’s truly something to witness!!

Okay. Right. Ahem. Moving right on along….

I’ll kick off this discussion with the formal structure of the film. It’s honestly impossible to classify. I have the questionable fortune of having been taken to many a strange avant-garde operas and art exhibitions by my parents when I was younger, and the strongest parallel I found to this movie was melodramatic opera stagings full of flamboyant flourishes, austere set pieces, and prolonged numbers where the characters wallow at length in their respective miseries. This movie has all the elevated drama, spectacle, and self-aggrandizement belonging to any self-professed rock opera. Think psychedelic rock opera films a la The Who’s Tommy, Hair, Phantom of the Paradise, and hell, even Rocky Horror. Yes, this film really is THAT weird.

But Annette is also in large part a vibrant, absurdist performance piece. The film is intriguingly book-ended by two scenes where the lines blur between actor and character; and your own role blurs between passive viewer and interactive audience. The first scene has the cast walking through the streets of LA (I think?), singing “So May We Start?” directly to the camera in a self-aware prologue, smashing the fourth wall from the beginning and setting up the audience to play a direct role in the viewing experience. Though the cast then disburse and take up their respective roles, the sense of being directly performed to is reinforced throughout the film. This continues most concretely through Henry’s multiple stand-up comedy performances.

Though he performs to an audience in the film rather than directly to live viewers, these scenes are so lengthy, vulgar, and excessive that his solo performance act becomes an integral part of defining his character and conveying his arc as the film progresses. These scenes start to make the film itself feel like a one-man show. The whole shtick of Henry McHenry’s “Ape of God” show is its perverse irreverence and swaggering machismo. Over the span of what must be a five minute plus scene, Henry hacks up phlegm, pretends to choke himself with his microphone cord, prances across the stage with his bathrobe flapping about, simulates being shot, sprinkles many a misanthropic, charmless monologues in between, and ends by throwing off his robe and mooning the audience before he leaves the stage. (Yes, you see Adam’s ass within the film’s first twenty minutes, and we’re just warming up from there.) His one-man performances demonstrate his egocentrism, penchant for lowbrow and often offensive humor, and the fact that this character has thus far profited from indulging in and acting out his base vulgarities.

While never demonstrating any abundance of good taste, his shows teeter firmly towards the grotesque and unsanctionable as his marriage and mental health deteriorate. This is what I’m referring to when I described the film as a study in discomfiture. As he deteriorates, the later iterations of his stand-up show become utterly unsettling and at times revolting. The film could show mercy and stop at one to two minutes of his more deranged antics, but instead subjects you to a protracted display of just how insane this man might possibly be. In Adam’s hands, these excessive, indulgent performance scenes take on disturbing but intriguing ambiguity, as you again wonder where the performance ends and the real man begins. When Henry confesses to a crime during his show and launces into an elaborate, passionate reenactment on stage, you shift uncomfortably in your seat wondering how much of it might just be true. Wondering just how much of an animal this man truly is.

Watching this film as an Adam fan, these scenes are unparalleled displays of his range and prowess. He’s in turns amusing and revolting; intolerable and pathetic; but always, always riveting. I couldn’t help thinking to myself that for the casual, non Adam-obsessed viewer, the effect of these scenes might stop at crass and unappealing. But in terms of the sheer range and power of acting on display? These scenes are a damn marvel. Through these scenes alone, his performance largely imbues the film with its wild, primal, and vaguely menacing atmosphere.

His stand-up scenes were, to me, some of the most intense of the film – sometimes downright difficult to endure. But they’re only a microcosm of the R A N G E he exhibits throughout the film’s entirety. Let’s talk about how he’s animalistic, menacing, and genuinely unsettling to watch (Leos Carax described him as “feline” at some point, and I 100% see it); and then with a mere subtle twitch of his expression, sheen of his eyes, or slump of his shoulders, he’s suddenly a lost, broken thing.  

Henry McHenry is truly to be reviled. Twitter might as well spare their breath and announce he’s already cancelled. He towers above the rest of the cast with intimidating, predatory physicality; he is prone to indulgence in his vices; and he constantly seems at risk of releasing some wild, uncontrollable madness lingering just beneath his surface. But as we all well know, Adam has an unerring talent for lending pathos to even the most objectively condemnable characters.

In a repeated refrain during his first comedy show, the audience keeps asking him, “Why did you become a comedian?” He dodges the question or gives sarcastic answers, until finally circling back to the true answer later in the film. It was something to the effect of: “To disarm people. It’s the only way I can tell the truth without it killing me.” Even for all their sick spectacle, there are also moments in his stand-up shows of disarming vulnerability and (seeming) honesty. In a similar moment of personal exposition, he confesses his temptation and “sympathy for the abyss.” (This phrase is hands down my favorite of the film.) He repeatedly refers to his struggle against “the abyss” and, at the same time, his perceived helplessness against it. “There’s so little I can do, there’s so little I can do,” he sings repeatedly throughout the film - usually just after doing something horrific.

Had he been played by anyone else, the first full look of him warming up before his show - hopping in place and punching the air like some wannabe boxer, interspersing puffs of his cigarette with chowing down on a banana – would have been enough for me to swear him off. His archetype is something of a cliché at this point – a brusque, boorish man who can’t stomach or preserve the love of others due to his own self-loathing. There were multiple points when it was only Adam’s face beneath the character that kept my heart cracked open to him. But sure enough, he wedged his fingers into that tiny crack and pried it wide open. The film’s final few scenes show him at his chin-wobbling best as he crumbles apart in small, mournful subtleties.

(General, semi-spoiler ahead as to the tone of the film’s ending – skip this paragraph if you’d rather avoid.) For a film that professes not to take itself very seriously (how else am I supposed to interpret the freaky puppet baby?), it delivers a harsh, unforgiving ending to its main character. And sure enough, despite how much I might have wanted to distance myself and believe it was only what he deserved, I found myself right there with him, sharing his pain. It is solely testament to Adam’s tireless dedication to breathing both gritty realism and stubborn beauty into his characters that Henry sank a hook into some piece of my sympathy.

Not only does Adam have to be the only actor capable of imbuing Henry with humanity despite his manifold wrongs, he also has to be the only actor capable of the wide-ranging transformations demanded of the role. He starts the movie with long hair and his full refrigerator brick house physique. His physicality and size are actively leveraged to engender a sense of disquiet and unpredictability through his presence. He appears in turns tormented and tormentor. There were moments when I found myself thinking of Conan the Barbarian, simply because his physical presence radiates such wild, primal energy (especially next to tiny, dainty Marion and especially with that long hair). Cannot emphasize enough: The raw sex appeal is off the goddamn charts and had me – a veteran fangirl of 3+ years - shook to my damn core.

The film’s progression then ages him – his hair cut shorter and his face and physique gradually becoming more gaunt. By the film’s end, he has facial prosthetics to make him seem even more stark and borderline sickly – a mirror of his growing internal torment. From a muscular, swaggering powerhouse, he pales and shrinks to a shell of a man, unraveling as his face becomes nearly deformed by time and guilt. He is in turns beautiful and grotesque; sensual and repulsive. I know of no other actor whose face (and its accompanying capacity for expressiveness) could lend itself to such stunning versatility.

Quick note here that he was given a reddish-brown birthmark on the right side of his face for this film?? It becomes more prominent once his hair is shorter in the film’s second half. I’m guessing it was Leos’ idea to make his face even more distinctive and riveting? If so, joke’s on you, Mr. Carax, because we’re always riveted. ☺

I mentioned way up at the beginning that the film is bookended by two scenes where the lines blur between actor and character, and between reality and performance. This comes full circle at the film’s end, with Henry’s final spoken words (this doesn’t give any plot away but skip to the next paragraph if you would rather avoid!) being “Stop watching me.” That’s it. The show is over. He has told his last joke, played out his final act, and now he’s done living his life as a source of cheap, unprincipled laughs and thrills for spectators. The curtain closes with a resounding silence.

Now, I definitely won’t have a section where I talk (of course) about the Ben Solo parallels. He’s haunted by an “abyss” aka darkness inside of him? Bad things happened when he finally gave in and stared into that darkness he knew lived within him? As a result of those tragedies, (SPOILER – Skip to next paragraph to avoid) he then finds himself alone and with no one to love or be loved by? NO I’M DEFINITELY NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT IT AT ALL, I’M JUST FINE HERE UNDER MY MOUNTAINS OF TISSUES.

Let’s talk about the music! The film definitely clocks in closer to a rock opera than musical, because almost the entire thing is conveyed through ongoing song, rather than self-contained musical numbers appearing here and there. This actually helps the film’s continuity and pacing, by keeping the characters perpetually in this suspended state of absurdity, always propelled along by some beat or melody. Whenever the film seems on the precipice of tipping all the way into the bleak and dark, the next whimsical tune kicks in to reel us all blessedly back. For example, after (SPOILER #1) happens, there’s a hard cut to the bright police station where several officers gather around Henry, bopping about and chattering on the beat “Questions! We have a few questions!”

Adam integrates his singing into his performance in such a way that it seems organic. I realized after the film that I never consciously considered the quality of his singing along the way. For all that I talked about the film maintaining the atmosphere of a fourth wall-defying performance piece, Adam’s singing is so fully immersed in the embodiment of his character that you almost forget he’s singing. Rather, this is simply how Henry McHenry exists. His stand-up scenes are the only ones in the film that do frequently transition back and forth between speaking and singing, but it’s seamlessly par for the course in Henry’s bizarre, dour show. He breaks into his standard “Now laugh!” number with uninterrupted sarcasm and contempt. There were certainly a few soft, poignant moments when his voice warbled in a tender vibrato you couldn’t help noticing – but otherwise, the singing was simply an extension of that full-body persona he manages to convey with such apparent ease and naturalism.

On the music itself: I’ll admit that the brief clip of “We Love Each Other So Much” we got a few weeks ago made me a tad nervous. It seemed so cheesy and ridiculous? But okay, you really can’t take anything from this movie out of context. Otherwise it is, indeed, utterly ridiculous. Not that none of it is ever ridiculous in context either, but I’m giving you assurances right now that it WORKS. Once you’re in the flow of constant singing and weirdness abound, the songs sweep you right along. Some of the songs lack a distinctive hook or melody and are moreso rhythmic vehicles for storytelling, but it’s now a day later and I still have three of the songs circulating pleasantly in my head. “We Love Each Other So Much” was actually the stand out for me and is now my favorite of the soundtrack. It’s reprised a few times later in the film, growing increasingly melancholy each time it is echoed, and it hits your heart a bit harder each time. The final song sung during (SPOILER #2), though without a distinctive melody to lodge in my head, undoubtedly left me far more moved than a spoken version of this scene would have. Adam’s singing is so painfully desperate and earnest here, and he takes the medium fully under his command.

Finally, it does have to be said that parts of this film veer fully towards the ridiculous and laughable. The initial baby version of the Annette puppet-doll was nothing short of horrifying to me. Annette gets more center-stage screen time in the film’s second half, which gives itself over to a few special effects sequences which look to be flying out at you straight from 2000 Windows Movie Maker. The scariest part is that it all seems intentional. The quality special effects appear when necessary (along with some unusual and captivating time lapse shots), which means the film’s most outrageous moments are fully in line with its guiding spirit. Its extravagant self-indulgence nearly borders on camp.

...And with that, I’ve covered the majority of the frantic notes I took for further reflection immediately after viewing. It’s now been a few days, and I’m looking forward to rewatching this movie when I can hopefully take it in a bit more fully. This time, I won’t just be struggling to keep up with the madness on screen. My concluding thoughts at this point: Is it my favorite Adam movie? Certainly not. Is it the most unforgettable? Aside from my holy text, The Last Jedi, likely yes. It really is the sort of thing you have to see twice to even believe it. And all in all, I say again that Adam truly carried this movie, and he fully inhabits even its highest, most ludicrous aspirations. He’s downright abhorrent in this film, and that’s exactly what makes him such a fucking legend.

I plan to make a separate post in the coming days about my experience at Cannes and the Annette red carpet, since a few people have asked! I can’t even express how damn good it feels to be globetrotting for Adam-related experiences again. <3

Thanks so much for reading! Feel free to ask me any further questions at all here or on Twitter! :)

*SYNOPSIS INCLUDED BELOW. DO NOT READ FURTHER IF AVOIDING SPOILERS!*

Synopsis: Comedian Henry McHenry and opera singer Ann Defrasnoux are both at the pinnacle of their respective success when they fall in love and marry. The marriage is happy and passionate for a time, leading to the birth of their (puppet) daughter, Annette. But tabloids and much of the world believe the crude, brutish Henry is a poor match for refined, idolized Ann. Ann and Henry themselves both begin to feel that something is amiss – Henry gradually losing his touch for his comedy craft, claiming that being in love is making him ill. He repeatedly and sardonically references how Ann’s opera career involves her “singing and dying” every night, to the point that he sees visions of her “dead” body on the stage. Meanwhile, Ann has a nightmare of multiple women accusing Henry of abusive and violent behavior towards them, and she begins growing wary in his presence. (He never acts abusively towards her, unless you count that scene when he tickles her feet and licks her toes while she’s telling him to stop??? Yeah I know, WILD.)

The growing sense of unease, that they’re both teetering on the brink of disaster, culminates in the most deranged of Henry’s stand-up comedy performances, when he gives a vivid reenactment of killing his wife by “tickling her to death.” The performance is so maudlin and unsettling that you wonder whether he’s not making it up at all, and the audience strongly rebukes him. (This is the “What is your problem?!” scene with tiddies out. The full version includes Adam storming across the stage, furiously singing/yelling, “What the FUCK is your problem?!”) But when Henry arrives home that night, drunk and raucous, Ann and Annette are both unharmed.

The couple take a trip on their boat, bringing Annette with them. The boat gets caught in a storm, and Henry drunkenly insists that he and Ann waltz in the storm. She protests that it’s too dangerous and begs him to see sense. (SPOILER #1) The boat lurches when Henry spins her, and Ann falls overboard to her death. Henry rescues Annette from the sinking boat and rows them both to shore. He promptly falls unconscious, and a ghost of Ann appears, proclaiming her intention to haunt Henry through Annette. Annette (still a toddler at this point and yes, still a wooden puppet) then develops a miraculous gift for singing, and Henry decides to take her on tour with performances around the world. He enlists the help of his “conductor friend,” who had been Ann’s accompanist and secretly had an affair with her before she met Henry.

Henry slides further into drunken debauchery as the tour progresses, while the Conductor looks after Annette and the two grow close. Once the tour concludes, the Conductor suggests to Henry that Annette might be his own daughter – revealing his prior affair with Ann. Terrified by the idea of anyone finding out and the possibility of losing his daughter, Henry drowns the Conductor in the pool behind his and Ann’s house. Annette sees the whole thing happen from her bedroom window.

Henry plans one last show for Annette, to be held in a massive stadium at the equivalent of the Super Bowl. But when Annette takes the stage, she refuses to sing. Instead, she speaks and accuses Henry of murder. (“Daddy kills people,” are the actual words – not that that was creepy to hear as this puppet’s first spoken words or anything.)

Henry stands trial, during which he sees an apparition of Ann from when they first met. They sing their regret that they can’t return to the happiness they once shared, until the apparition is replaced by Ann’s vengeful spirit, who promises to haunt Henry in prison. After his sentencing (it’s not clear what the sentence was, but Henry definitely isn’t going free), Annette is brought to see him once in prison. Speaking fully for the first time, she declares she can’t forgive her parents for using her: Henry for exploiting her voice for profit and Ann for presumably using her to take vengeance on Henry. (Yes, this is why she was an inanimate doll moving on strings up to this point – there was some meaning in that strange, strange artistic choice. She was the puppet of her parents’ respective egotisms.) The puppet of Annette is abruptly replaced by a real girl in this scene, finally enabling two-sided interaction and a long-missed genuine connection between her and Henry, which made this quite the emotional catharsis. (SPOILER #2) It concludes with Annette still unwilling to forgive or forget what her parents have done, and swearing never to sing again. She says Henry now has “no one to love.” He appeals, “Can’t I love you, Annette?” She replies, “No, not really.” Henry embraces her one last time before a guard takes her away and Henry is left alone.

…..Yes, that is the end. It left me with major emotional whiplash, after the whole film up to this point kept pulling itself back from the total bleak and dark by starting up a new toe-tapping, mildly silly tune every few minutes. But this last scene instead ends on a brutal note of harsh, unforgiving silence.

BUT! Make sure you stick around through the credits, when you see the cast walking through a forest together. (This is counterpart to the film’s opening, when you see the cast walking through LA singing “So May We Start?” directly to the audience) Definitely pay attention to catch Adam chasing/playing with the little girl actress who plays Annette! That imparts a much nicer feeling to leave the theater with. :’)

#Adam Driver #Annette #Cannes 2021 #driverdaily #Annette spoilers

[number5theboy]

Please elaborate on how Five could've turned into the most insufferable character to watch

Thanks for asking me to elaborate on this text post:

@tessapercygranger​, @waywardd1​ and @margarita-umbrella​ also wanted to see a more detailed version of it, and I ended up writing an essay that’s longer than some of my actual academic essays. So buckle up.

WHY NUMBER FIVE SHOULD BE THE MOST OBNOXIOUS CHARACTER IN TV HISTORY, AND HOW HE MANAGES NOT TO BE

Number Five: The Concept That Could Go Horribly Wrong

Alright, let’s first look at Five in theory in an overarching way, without taking into account the execution of the show. The basic set-up of the character, of course, is being a 58-year-old consciousness in a teenager’s body, due to a miscalculation in time travel. Right off the bat, Five is bar none the most overpowered of the siblings; by the end of Season 2, no one has yet been able to defeat him in a fight. He is a master assassin – and not just any master assassin, but the best one there is – and a survival expert, able to do complex maths and physics without the aid of a calculator, shown to have knowledge of half a dozen languages, has very developed observational skills and, to top that all off, he can manipulate time and space to the point where he can literally erase events that happened and change the course of history. And Five knows how skilled he is; he is arrogant, self-assured and sarcastic, and his streak of goodness is buried deep inside. David Castañeda once described Five in an interview as 90% chocolate with a cherry in the middle, meaning that you have to get through a lot of darkness and bitterness before knowing there is a good core, and I think it’s an excellent metaphor. However, Five is also incredibly, fundamentally terrible at communicating with anyone, and, because he is the only one with time travel abilities, the character a lot of the actual plot - and the moving forward of it - centres around. Also he’s earnestly in love with a mannequin, who is pretty much a projection of his own consciousness that functions as a coping mechanism for all the trauma he has endured. All in all, this gives you a character who looks like a teenager, but with the smug superiority of a fifty-something, who a) is extremely skilled in many different things, b) has a superiority complex, is arrogant and vocal about it, and most of the superiority is expressed through cutting sarcasm, c) has one very hidden ounce of goodness that he is literally the worst at communicating to other human beings, d) is what moves the plot along but is also bad at talking to anyone else, meaning that the plot largely remains with him, and e) his love interest is essentially a projection of himself. Tell me that’s not a character who is destined to be just…obnoxious, annoying, egocentric, a necessary evil that one has to put up with to get through this show. There are so many elements of this characterisation that can and should easily make Five beyond insufferable, but the show manages to avoid it, and I’m putting this down to three aspects.

That Trick of Age and Appearance

Bluntly put, Five as a character would not work if he was anything else than an old man in a 13-year-old body. Imagine this character and all his skills and knowledge, but actually just…a teenager. Immediately insufferable. Same goes for him being around 30, like his siblings, all of which are stunted and traumatised by their father’s abuse. If Five, being comparatively unscathed by Reginald to the point where he explicitly does not want to be defined by his association with his father, were 30 like his siblings, it would just take the bite out of that plot point and also give him a lot less time in the apocalypse, reducing the impact it had on him as a person. And making Five his actual 58-year-old self would make him very similar to Reginald, at least on surface level, with the appearance and attitude. Five and Reginald are two fundamentally different people, but having one of the siblings being a senior citizen that’s dressed to the nines and bosses his siblings around in a relatively self-centred way does open up that parallel, and would take away from Five’s charm as a character. Because pairing the life experience of a 58-year-old with the appearance of a teenager gives you the best of both worlds. You get the other siblings (and a lot of the audience, from a glance in the tags of my gifsets) feeling protective and paternal about Five, but his age and experience also give the justifications for his many skills, his arrogance, in a way, and his ability to decimate a room full of people. It’s the very interesting and not new concept of someone dangerous with the appearance of something harmless, a child. This is also where Five’s singular outfit comes in. I know we like to clown on Five to get a new outfit, but I think what gets forgotten often is how effective this outfit is at making the viewer take him seriously. The preppy school uniform is the perfect encapsulation of the tension between old man in spirit and young teenager in appearance. The blazer, vest and especially the shirt and tie are quite formal, relatively grown up. They’re not something we, the audience, usually associate with a teenage boy wearing; it makes Five just a little bit more grown up. But there is also a reason characters in this show keep bringing up Five’s shorts and his socks, because those are not things that we associate with grown men wearing; they’re the unmistakably childish part of his school uniform. Take a moment and imagine Five wearing a hoodie or a t-shirt, jeans, and sneakers; would that outfit work for him as well as the uniform does? Would he be able to command the same kind of respect or seriousness as a character? I don’t think so; the outfit is a lot more pivotal in making Five believable than a lot of people give it credit for.

Writing Nuance

The other big building block in not making Five incredibly insufferable is the writing. Objectively speaking, I think Five is the most well-written, and, more importantly, most coherently written character on the show (which does have to do with the fact that the show’s events are all sequential for him), and his arc and personality remain relatively intact over the course of the two seasons. More to the point, a giant part of what makes Five bearable as a character is that he is allowed to fail. He is written to have high highs and low lows, big victories through his skills and his intelligence, but also catastrophic failures and the freedom to be wrong. His superior intellect and skillset are not the be-all end-all of the plot or his character, just something that influences both. His inability for communication has not (yet) been used to fabricate a contrived misunderstanding that derails the plot and left all of us seething; instead, it’s a characteristic that makes him fail to reconnect with the people he loves. This is a bit simplified, as he does find common ground with Luther, for example, but in general, a lot of the rift between Five and his siblings is that they can’t relate to his traumas and he does not understand the depth of Reginald’s abuse, which is an interesting conflict worth exploring. Another thing that really works in Five’s favour is that he is definitely written to be mean and sarcastic, but it is never driven to the point of complete unlikability, and a lot of the time, the context makes it understandable why he reacts the way he does. Most of the sarcastic lines he gets are actually funny, that certainly helps, but in general, Five is a good example of a bearable character whose default personality is sharp and relatively cold, because it is balanced out with many moments of vulnerability. Delores is incredibly important for this in the first season, she is the main focus of Five’s humanising moments, and well-written as she totes the line between clearly being a coping mechanism for an extremely traumatised man and still coming across to the viewer as the human contact Five needs her to be. In the second season, the vulnerability is about his guilt for his siblings, it’s about Five connecting a little bit better to them. There’s also his relationship with the Commission and the Handler specifically – which honestly could be an essay on its own – that deserves a mention, because the Handler is why Five became the man he is, and this dynamic between creator and creation is explored in a very interesting way – their scenes are some of the most well-written in the entire show. And TUA never falls into the trap of making Five a hero, he is always morally ambiguous at best, and it just makes for an interesting, multi-faceted character, well-written character, and none of the characteristics that should make him unlikeable are allowed to take centre-stage for long enough to be defining on their own. I know a lot of people especially champion the scenes where Five goes apeshit, but without his more nuanced characterisation, if he was like that all the time, those scenes would not hit as hard.

Aidan Gallagher’s Performance is Underrated

But honestly, none of the above would matter that much if the Umbrella Academy didn’t luck out hard with the casting of Aidan Gallagher. I think what he achieves as an actor in this show is genuinely underappreciated. Like, the first season set out to cast six adults having to deal with various ramifications of childhood trauma, and a literal child that had to be able to act smart and wise beyond his years, seamlessly integrate into a family of adults while seeming like an adult, traumatised by the literal end of the world, AND had to be able to create the romantic chemistry of a thirty-year-long marriage with a lifeless department store doll. The only role I could think of to compare is Kirsten Dunst in Interview with a Vampire, where she plays a vampire child who, because she is undead, doesn’t age physically, but does mentally, so she’s 400 in a child’s body. And Kirsten Dunst had to do that for a two-hour movie. Five is a main character in a show that spans 20 episodes now. That’s insane, and it’s a risk. Five is a character that can’t be allowed to go wrong; if you don’t buy Five as a character, the entire first season loses believability. And they found someone who could do that not only convincingly, but also likeably. As I said, he is incredibly helped by the costuming department and the script, but Aidan Gallager’s Five has so much personality, he’s threatening and funny and charming and arrogant and heartbreaking. He has the range to be convincing in the quiet moments where Five’s humanity comes to show and in the moments where Five goes completely off the rails. Most child actors act with other children, but he is the only child in the main cast, and holds his own in scenes with adults not as a child, but as an adult on equal footing with the other adult characters. That’s not something to be taken for granted. But even apart from the fact that it’s a child actor who carries a lot of the plot and the drama of a series for adults, Aidan Gallagher’s portrayal of Five is also just so much fun. The comedic timing is on point, he has the dramatic chops for the serious scenes, the mannerisms and visual ticks add to the character rather than distract from him, and his line deliveries, paired with his physical acting, make Five arrogant and smug but never outright malicious and unlikeable. It’s just some terrific acting that really does justice to the character as he is written, but the writing would not be as strong if it wasn’t delivered and acted out the way Aidan Gallagher does. He is an incredible asset for this show.

Alright, onto concluding this rambling. If you made it this far, I commend you, and thank you for it. The point of all of this is that Five, as a character, could have been an unmitigated disaster of a TV character. He is overpowered, arrogant, uncommunicative and could so easily have been either unconvincing or completely unlikeable, but he turned out to be neither. It’s a combination of choices in the costume department, decisions in the writing room, and Aidan Gallagher’s acting skills that make the things that should make him obnoxious and annoying incredibly entertaining, and I hope you liked my long-winded exploration of these. Some nuance was lost along the way, but if I had not stopped myself, this would’ve become a full-blown thesis.

#thanks for the ask again #TUA #The Umbrella Academy #Five Hargreeves #tua s2 spoilers #my meta #i guess #Replies #Anonymous

[phantomphangphucker]

Ectober Day 10: Ring - Heavy On The Heart, Light Upon The Head

Maddie worries over Danny plenty and he’s more than a little strange. But ghost royalty seems to be taking things a bit far. Yet somehow, it suits him.

Maddie knows something’s up with her son. Has been for a while. Two years at least. And she has a bad feeling ghosts have something to do with it.

He was stronger, bolder in personality and she knows his baggy clothing hides defined muscle. More muscle than either her or Jack have. She doesn’t know exactly how that happened. But the muscle she could understand to a level, same with the scarring she occasionally spots. Ghosts had plagued this town for nearly four years now. And the school was a hot spot. Self-defence was a required class now and everyone frequently had to run or even possibly fight. Every single person was stronger, Danny just seemed more so than others. She could maybe pass it off as genetics from Jack; who had always had an easy time putting on muscle... and fat.

What concerned her more was the mental changes. The increased confidence and boldness was one thing, not strange in the slightest for a teen nearing adulthood. But it was more than that. He had this wise air about him. Not smart, but wise. Something she once felt off of her grandmother. To get that from her son was strange and wrong. Not bad, just wrong. And that air about him felt powerful too, and commanding. It was as if an army commander had just walked into the room half the time. And the way he would look at people, soft and protective. Like he really was a soldier coming upon a group of sweet innocent children. Even relaxing or lounging around, it still seemed like power thrummed under his skin. And talking to him often made her feel like he knew things she didn’t and that he knew that she didn’t know what he did. But it wasn’t pompous. It was more like an adult protecting the innocent mind of a child. In Jack’s case, she could understand a little. Jack could be a little naive and oblivious. But her? Danny shouldn’t be able to make her feel that way so easily, and clearly unintentionally.

It was strange. It was off. And it didn’t make sense. Sometimes he didn’t even seem to resemble the boy he used to be.

As for why she thought ghosts might have something to do with why? Well looking at him at the supper table... It’s late October. The sun is setting. And the lights were broken this morning. Leaving the fading dark orange sunlight as the only thing lighting up the mess of noddles, her son, and her. Jack off fixing the lighting situation and Jazz off at Havard. And in this dark light, she notices that ring of his, the one he’s worn like it’s attached to him for the past year, is glowing. It’s green and it’s glowing. It’s faint, but it’s there. So that’s why she thinks he’s gotten involved with something ghostly; and that it’s changed him. Because that ring is absolutely ghostly in origin.

The first thought that enters her head as she pauses, spoon halfway to her open mouth, is: could that be possessing him? Or allowing a ghost to? The second is: did he steal that from some ghost? Those thoughts should be in the opposite order, but they’re not. Because something’s off with Danny.

Her eyes move from the ring to Danny, finishing the motions of putting the noodles in her mouth while he moves his left hand under the table. Obviously he noticed she noticed. Obviously he knew something was up with the ring and was hiding it. Obviously he didn’t want her commenting on it or being suspicious of it. Was that something to be concerned over? Or suspicious of? Did that mean there was, in fact, something nefarious surrounding the ring or why he wears it? She’s unsure, and other than moving his hand out of her line of sight, he doesn’t outwardly acknowledge her suspicions. He successfully made the motion look nonchalant. Normal. But she can’t let that make her feel better or trick her into thinking he didn’t actually notice her pause. Because she knows how good of a liar he is. How skilled of an actor he was. Could that be the doing of the ring? But that wouldn’t quite make sense, he’s been changing, changed, for a while. It’s just become more pronounced as of late.

She needs to think.

But in all honestly? Thinking hasn’t been doing her much good. All she’s done with Danny is think. Think on his changes. On if the ghost problem affected him. On if he really could ever become a hunter, take over FentonWorks. On a lot of things. And it had gotten her nowhere with him. It was like no matter how much she stared at the puzzle, she couldn’t put it together. Like too many pieces were missing or damaged to make any sense of the whole. And how is she supposed to figure out what those missing pieces were if she couldn’t even understand the whole? She couldn’t. So maybe she should try something different. Though Jack was always the more vocal and bold one, she could do that too. And sure, she could ask Jack to talk to him, but he didn’t put enough thought into things. Didn’t notice the finer details. And with Danny, those finer details were everything.

Like how he was eating just slightly faster. Clearly wanting out of this situation before she decided to speak up or maybe noticed something else. Saw a different glimpse of the mystery that was her son. If he even was her son.

She tries not to follow him with her eyes suspiciously as he gets up to put away his dishes. Choosing to speak up just before he actually crosses the threshold to the living-room, “your ring is glowing”. No beating around the bush, give him as little to work with as possible. And if he keeps walking now it would not only be very rude but also effectively an act of running away. No way would his pride allow for that. Whether that pride was from plain old confidence or ghostly in nature.

As she hoped and planned he pauses, stilling for a second before turning his head back to her; body only turned slightly to her, hiding his entire left side from her view. “Oh?”. Guess he was giving her as little to work with as possible too.

Maddie nods softly, better to not seem on the offensive, “yes it is. No the question is, why?”.

He’s silent for a bit before, “no reason, Halloween knick-knacks like copying ghosts. Especially around here”, shrugging, “glow-sticks are pretty popular after all”.

Maddie can’t help sighing at that. She could throw in the towel and just leave it at that. Just accept the blatant lie. Stay ignorant. The look Danny’s giving her is obviously encouraging her to do just that. It’s the kind of look given to children when they ask where babies come from when they’re honestly still too young. But with more... pity. Just the thing is, if she doesn’t ask now. Doesn’t grab the small thread that’s unraveled from his tightly woven cover before he snips it off. Then she’ll never know. And not just about the ring specifically, but Danny as a whole.

If she ignores this now, she’ll have to write him off as a lost cause. And based on that look on his face and the fact that he’s still standing there, waiting on her. Tells her that he knows that too. So to her that leaves her with no choice. He’s her son, or maybe was, and she won’t leave him behind. If this is some ghost possessing him or polluting him, then she’ll save him. And if it’s not, then she’ll go from there. “Danny, please. I know that’s a lie”.

Danny blinks at her, and he looks like he can’t decide between a smile and a frown. He catches her completely off guard though, “yeah. Yeah it was”, and chuckles. Lifting up his left hand and looking down at the glowing ring before looking back to her, “I’m surprised it took you so long to notice”, chuckling some more.

If it wasn’t for the clear humour behind his words she’d almost feel offended. Her, a ghost hunter, not noticing something ghostly. That was absolutely embarrassing. But Danny didn’t make it feel like she should be embarrassed about it. She’s oddly thankful over that. “If I scanned that, would it have an ecto-field”, there’s no point framing that as a question. The answer was obvious to both of them honestly.

Danny looks around, rubs his neck, and gives an oddly charming lopsided grin. Chuckling, “heh. Caught me?”.

Maddie blinks at that. Just like that? That... that didn’t even make sense. It usually took teeth-pulling to get Danny to be fully honest. And a ghost wouldn’t give up that easily; especially not around a ghost hunter. Getting up, “just like that? I mean, you know I’m not going to be happy you’ve got something ghostly on you. Ghostly of unknown origin at that”.

Danny shrugs, “no point really”, lifting up his left hand again and thumbing the ring to spin it around his finger. It was plain unnatural how smoothly and easily it spins around. Like it was slick and flawlessly fitted. “It’s kinda noticeable, and like you said, you are ghost hunters. I don’t think I genuinely could convince you it wasn’t ghostly”.

Maddie furrows her eyebrows at that, “picking your battles. Is that all it is”.

“Yes and no. Part of me was wondering if you ever would notice. And if you’d even be bothered to ask”.

Maddie can’t help but flinch at that. She knows she hasn’t been the most attentive mother. She knows that. She also knows she hasn’t given Danny all the support and help he probably needed when he was younger. Jazz thrived so much on her own, preferred that. In some ways she had just thought Danny would be the same. And sure, in some ways it does look like he’s thrived; is actively thriving. But he clearly wants her, needs her, in way Jazz never did and never would. But he’s always been so hard to read, to know. You could always tell what Jazz was thinking, how she felt; and if it wasn’t obvious then you bet she would make it obvious. While everything with Danny was just out of arms reach. Danny didn’t put the first foot forward with them the way Jazz did. Danny didn’t pounce on openings to make his thoughts and feelings known the way Jazz did. She needed to chase after him; but he always seemed to pull away more or throw up a wall. Maybe she just hadn’t tried hard enough? Or maybe he had just grown up. Maddie puts away her dishes, turning away from him, “sorry. I just never know what to do with you”, looking back to him, “you're just so...”.

Danny quirks an eyebrow, and finishes her thoughts for her, “strange?”.

Maddie sighs, a bit relived to hear him acknowledge that himself, and nods. Sitting back at the table, “yeah”, looking to his hand and the ring, “that ring. Can you take it off? Can I see it?”.

“That depends”, Danny actually smirks a little, “will you try to destroy it?”.

Maddie can’t help chuckling at that a little, that was blunt but he did have a point. She will absolutely admit to being a bit... rash when it comes to ghostly anything. But she knows Danny doesn’t like it when they get on about the evils of ghosts. And more than once that feeling of him knowing something has nagged at her during those rants. Jazz too, but Jazz always had an air of knowledge around her. And here and now, she’s positive that Danny will refuse outright if she even seems like she’ll damage this ring thing. So she shakes her head, “no”, thinking on it a little, “you’ve been wearing that for a while now. Constantly. Obviously there’s a reason or it’s important”, sighing, “I though it might be a gift from Valerie or even Vlad”. Danny becoming friendly with Vlad still threw her through a loop. Especially since it happened out of nowhere. And his girlfriend could honestly be downright intimidating. She could see either of them giving him a ring with a skull on it, even if the skull looked sad for some reason.

Danny laughs a bit loudly at that, “Vlad would let Jack punch him in the face before giving me this”. Maddie’s not sure what to make of that. “But in that case, then okay”, and walks over to the table, twisting the ring off and eyeing it for a bit before setting it down on the table; it making a loud click like it weighed a lot more than it seemed.

Maddie eyes it, making no move to grab it, “so Vlad knows what this is”, Danny was obviously implying as much. But honestly? Right now she’s just glad he can take the thing off. That means it’s not possessing him. Doesn’t eliminate influencing him though. And if this was something that belonged to a ghost overshadowing him then there’s no way It would hand it over to a ghost hunter. None.

Danny nods, “he never did lose interest in ghosts. He’s more into the mythology and history though, than biology and weaponry. More anthropologist than hunter”. Maddie looks up to him as he sits down across from her. Him nodding his head at the ring still sitting on the table, “that’s very old. In a way”, smirking and eyeing her a bit, “it’s not going to bite you know”.

Maddie gives him a look clearly saying with ghost things anything could possibly bite or harm. But she does pick it up, thumbing it and bringing it close to her face to inspect; though being a bit cautious about it, “if you say so”. Danny chuckles at that, “I do”. Which fine, does make her laugh a little.

Flipping the ring around, it really did just seem like a glowing ring. That’s it. Nothing seemed special about it. Of course she knew better. Ghostly things, and ghosts in general, could often be unassuming. So that didn’t really mean much. “What is it exactly?”.

Danny deadpans, “a ring”, making Maddie give him a ‘you know what I mean’ look, which he chuckles over, “you might understand a bit better if you scan it”, tilting his head, “slightly surprised you haven’t already done that”.

Maddie sighs, “I didn’t want to push it”.

“That’s fair”. Regardless, she does pull out one of her smaller scanners -not like something of this size would need anything more- and promptly scans the ring. Immediately stilling and just staring at the screen.

This thing... she could literally see waves of ectoplasmic energy being sucked into it. And the things glow was actually the reverse of normal. Instead of bleeding out ecto-energy it was creating a small field that pulled in ecto-energy. What in the world? What was this thing?

Pulling out a small vial of ectoplasm she had left in her pocket and holding it near the ring; never noticing the slight look of concentration on Danny’s face. Instead watching as all the ecto-energy is just... sapped out of the sample. What? Was this something that could literally remove ecto-energy from anything? What about a full-blown ghost? Or- blinking, or what about decontaminate someone. Danny had been badly contaminated ever since his accident and nothing seemed to permanently decontaminate him. Somehow the ectoplasmic energy would just restock itself. Could it be? Could he have found something that could constantly and consistently decontaminate him? And Vlad, he likely was ecto-contaminated in a similar fashion. His ecto-acne did return that one time after all. So that would explain him likely wanting this thing. Looking back to him, “have you been using this to control your contamination?”. If so, then this was something she should really be encouraging him to wear.

Danny blinks at her and looks slightly like he doesn’t understand how she came to that conclusion for a couple seconds. Which tells her she’s missed something here. He gives her a quizzical look, “mom... when was the last time you scanned me”, and seems almost worried for her. Like he found it concerning that she hadn’t been doing that frequently.

Maddie blinks and glances to the scanner then back to him, “you never seemed to like that, so we just... stopped”.

“Oh”. He sounds a bit apologetic.

Maddie nods, looks to the scanner, and bites her lip slightly. Looking back to him and holding it up a little, “can I?”. He nods and she nearly drops the scanner when she scans him. His contamination was worse. So much worse. He was practically bleeding ecto-energy. She can’t find anything to say and just watches him as he moves his hand over the ring. Her eyes widening at seeing energy move from the ring to his hand. Like it was feeding him. This wasn’t reducing or control his contamination, it was making it worse! And Danny knew. What the Hell?

She can’t help snatching the ring away from him, looking to him with worry, “why?”, there was so many questions in that one ‘why’. Why was this expelling ectoplasm into him. Why was he wearing this if he knew. Why was it even doing that. Why was it absorbing ectoplasm from everything but him. Why would he even want something like this. And better yet, glancing back down at the ring through the scanner and seeing that it is not feeding ectoplasm into her, why the heck was it only expelling ectoplasm into him specifically.

Looking back to Danny, who’s giving her a clear ‘you said you wouldn’t damage it’ look as he speaks, “I have my reasons”. Making it clear he wasn’t going to tell her unless she gave it back and trusted him. Which yes, was more difficult than it had any right to be.

She gives him back the ring.

She’s surprised though when he just leaves it on the table in front of him. She clues in though, that this is him saying the conversation isn’t over. That he’s open to explaining. Trust for trust. Danny nods, “thanks”. Maddie nodding back awkwardly, she honestly did not want to give it back. That thing shouldn’t be anywhere near him. But checking the scanner, it wasn’t feeding into him; obviously it wasn’t quite close enough. So clearly he was aware of her discomfort.

Maddie swallows, looking back to him, “so...”. Her question was still the same and she didn’t even know where to start on elaborating. He had a ring that sucked ecto-energy out of things and fed it into him, and wanted it. Could be like an addiction or something?

Danny nods and leans back in his chair, “alright. This ring, it’s part of a set. I have the other part, obviously”, nodding his head at the scanner, “that’s why it only does that to me. Not you”. Maddie looks at his other fingers, which he clearly notices, “the other part’s not a ring”.

Maddie nods and bites her lip slightly, “so, this... effect would happen to anyone if they had both parts. But that- why? Why would you want that?”.

Danny wiggles his hand in the air, “that would depend. Most would be destroyed if they did”. Maddie chokes at that. This thing could destroy someone??? What is her son thinking???? She doesn’t even have to ask though, Danny poking the ring and wiggling it back and forth on the table, “the set was modified specifically for me, so I’m fine. Don’t worry”.

Maddie barely feels relieved by that. Because honestly? That just raised even more questions. “Why? How even?”.

“That’s complicated”.

Maddie instantly recognises that as another ‘will she push or just accept it’. “Then explain it. I want to know, Danny. I want to know you”, sighing, “and I don’t. Haven’t for a while”. And Danny doesn’t even beat around the bush when he replies, “yeah”. Which hurts to hear. Sure she knew, but still.

Danny eyes the ring for a bit before nodding, looking up to her, “it makes more sense if you know the story of this thing. And before you worry too much, while the ring takes in energy, the other piece expels it”.

Maddie leans back at that, likely noticeably relieved, “that... I’m glad to hear it. Even if that doesn’t seem to make sense. What’s even the point of pulling in energy just to expel it?”, that made zero sense. None. But at least that meant it wasn’t actually making him worse.

Danny chuckles, “and that’s even more complicated. The backstory really will help”. Maddie sighs and nods, Danny was clearly directing this conversation. Which on one hand made her happy because he was trusting her; but that also meant he would only tell her what he wanted to, nothing more. Not like she could make him tell her more though.

Danny smirks slightly, “there were three before me. I honestly don’t know the name of the first. Or much about her for that matter. But the second was a guy named Laufiel who thought he was blessed by the gods and had some seriously speciesist opinions. Thought ghosts were some kind of ultimate beings. He also killed the first owner”. Maddie can’t help but shake her head and scoff a little at that, though she could see how someone could think ghosts were god-like; especially if this-these things were really incredibly old. “The third owner killed Laufiel and also had some weird opinions on ghosts. More like a hunter I guess. Thought ghosts needed to be contained, controlled, or obliterated. Also thought humans were inferior though. He thought he literally was a god. Ridiculous, I know”.

Maddie has to cut in, “so all these ‘previous owners’ had opinions on humans and ghosts, and clearly acted on them? And... killed the previous owner?”, that last bit carries an implication that she hopes he doesn’t miss. Because this trend... it implied Danny had killed someone. Danny gives her a look that makes her think she missed something again.

Danny purses his lips and hums, “hmmm. Okay. I guess that wasn’t all that helpful. Though it does have to do with them acting on their opinions”, rubbing his neck and seeming slightly embarrassed, “and the ‘killing the previous owner’ thing”. Which makes her gulp, he thankfully explains himself though, “it’ll be better if I explain who the previous owner was, and -to you at least- what he was”. Maddie’s eyebrows raise, was Danny implying that this previous owner was a ghost. Because yes, that did change things. Killing a ghost and killing a person weren’t the same thing. Though Danny was also obviously pointing out that it wasn’t all that different to him.

Danny shocks her out of her thoughts as he speaks up again, “he was Pariah. Yes, as in the ghost that transported Amity into the Ghost Zone a couple years back”, rubbing his neck again, “I might have... kinda... wound up ramming a sword through his Core”.

Maddie... Maddie has a lot of questions about that. How did that even happen? When was he even in a position to do that? Why’d he do that? She does feel a bit proud that he destroyed a ghost, but he clearly wouldn’t appreciate that pride. Which just makes her mentally emphasis the ‘why the heck would he do that’ question. And Pariah... that ghost was the most powerful they’ve ever seen. She knows Danny can be reckless but that was pushing it. “You know how powerful that ghost was, Danny? Why did you? How were you even? Is that why Vlad found you all beat up?”. She barely resists giving him a full scolding.

Danny rubs his neck some more and looking around, “yeah it was reckless and stupid. I know”, sighing and looking back to her, “but, he was effectively comatose when I did that. Down for the count. And if I didn’t, someone else would have”, fiddling with the ring again, “these two things, that have this kind of... aspect let’s say, that can tell if the wearer is ‘no longer worthy’ and needs to be passed on. Which happens if whoever loses to many battles or damages the Zone a ton. Pariah, he was sealed away by a bunch of pissed off ghosts a long time ago, and then when he was let loose Phantom went and beat him up. And so Pariah lost too much. So the ring and whatnot needed to be passed along”.

Maddie shakes her head a little, that practically explained nothing, “but that doesn’t explain why you did that? So what if someone else would have done that and got this ring? Why did you have to do that? Want to do that?”.

Danny sighs, “I have my reasons. A lot of them actually. There really wasn’t any one reason why I did it. Someone else possibly being able to do it was definitely a deciding factor for why I did it when I did. I personally would have preferred to wait ‘till I had graduated”, shrugging, “but I don’t mind. And the reduction in ghost attacks, and them not really attacking people is because of this”.

Maddie looks to the vial, which still was lacking any kind of glow. Could he? Could he destroy a ghost with just a touch? That... that would definitely encourage ghosts to be more restrained. She knows Danny’s a protective person. He is absolutely the type of person that would go to an abnormal extreme if it would protect a lot of people. But... protecting the town, humanity, from ghosts was a hunters job. Her and Jack’s job. And he was still young, and this sounded like something that was an ‘until death’ kind of thing. That.., that absolutely makes her feel guilty, “Danny, protecting the town isn’t your job”, she ignores the slight tense she almost misses, clearly saying that he did think it was his job, “why couldn't we have done this? Me or Jack?”.

Danny actually looks at her like she’s nuts. “Mom, that- you-“, shaking his head, “not just anyone can just take these things. There are prerequisites. And you two do not meet them”.

Maddie frowns, okay that makes sense but... “what... what are they? What could you have that we don’t?”. He was a minor for peat’s sake! And they were hunters.

Danny purses his lips, crosses his arms, and taps at his chin. Muttering, “how to explain this...”, and opens and closes his mouth a few times. Then sighing after a bit and meeting her eyes, “you’re going to hate Vlad for this”. Which immediately gives her an unpleasant ominous feeling. “Remember how I mentioned Vlad would never give these to me? Yeah he let Pariah out after finding the key to his keep. Vlad is at fault for that entire situation. And he did it to get these items and used Valerie as bait. Vlad didn’t ‘find me beat up’ he threw me at Pariah and watched me get beat up”, grumbling seemingly to himself, “if it wouldn’t have upset you, he might have left me to die”.

Maddie stares at him, feeling more than a little furious. “I’m going to kill that man”. Danny actually rolls his eyes, “you and half the Ghost Zone. Don’t bother”, shrugging, “besides, he’s better now. Still vaguely evil, but not actively maliciously evil. It’s something”.

Maddie blinks at him, “why the Zone are you even friendly to that scumbag. And I’m still going to kill him”, sighing and putting her head in her hands for a second before looking back to him, “but this still, still, doesn’t explain things. Vlad’s douchebaggery aside”.

Danny gives her another slightly pitying look, “our relationship is stupid complicated. I’m not sure I could even explain the mess between us. But ignoring him and his past villainy, because of that situation it was either me or him”, shaking his head with a slight chuckle, “and Vlad does stupid crazy things if you give him even a slight amount of power. The whole mayor thing is a stellar example”. Maddie cringes at that. That had been pretty bad. It did also effectively make his point though. And she knows Danny can be spiteful, even impulsive, when it came to Vlad. So that did explain things a little. Barely. But a little.

Danny pokes the ring, regaining her attention fully, “so there’s the backstory, and my part in it I guess. As for the rest of the background, it explains things more. Better”.

Maddie straightens up and gives him a strong nod. This is already a lot honestly. But, thinking on it, it was almost nothing too. All he had really explained was how he got this thing, or pair of things really. Heck, she doesn’t even know what the other thing was.

Danny rubs his neck and nods himself, “okay. So the pair, they’re artifacts of sovereignty. Yeah, you heard that right”, tapping the ring.

Maddie blinks, what? Is he using that word right? “What... what do you mean. ‘Sovereignty’, as in kings and queens and royalty, ‘sovereignty’. Are you trying to say you’re royalty now?”. What? No seriously, what?

Danny actually winces at that, “well... yeah. That’s what I’m doing”, Maddie just blinks at him which he obviously takes as a hint to keep going, “the items, their names and appearances change from owner to owner somewhat. But...”, he holds up the ring in front of his face, “the rings default name is The Ring Of Rulers”.

Maddie blinks at him more, mouth a bit dry. Swallowing and trying to put the sovereignty thing on the mental back-burner, “and the... other item?”.

Danny is clearly studying her, “I don’t really think you’re ready for that. I’m glad I can keep that one invisible”.

“...And you can’t do that with the ring”. Did Danny even realise he basically just said he had a ghost power!? Or maybe it only applied to these items. Shaking her head a little, “I want to know”.

Danny looks at the ring and shakes his head, looking back to her, “no I can’t. It’s because it sucks in instead of expels. Which I know hasn’t been explained yet”.

Maddie gives him a hard look, he was avoiding the question. Which means she would probably never know if she doesn’t push it, “no you haven’t, but I still want to know what the thing that expels is and everything. And the royalty thing”. Royalty over what? Where? How? Did just having these things make him royalty somehow? Biting her lip, “is that why you said you’d rather wait till after Highschool? Has this given you some kind of responsibility?”. What has Danny gotten himself into? What’s this ghostly thing done to him?

Danny sighs and seems to sag slightly against the chair, she can tell he’s clearly debating something. Him sighing again, “do you think you could wait a little? Explaining the expel/pull thing will kinda explain that, the royalty thing. But, yeah, that’s why I wanted to wait. Things can be a lot”, shrugging, “but I’m used to it at this point”.

Maddie has to force herself not to wince at that. No one wants to hear their kid say they’re used to things being difficult. Nodding while looking at the table instead, “okay. But I still want to know”.

“Fair”. Danny fiddles with the ring some before pointing to the scanner, “okay so, hear me out here”. Which only makes that nagging ominous feeling return full force for Maddie. “These items are obviously ghostly, right? And everything ghostly is connected to the Zone in some way, correct? Well, these two items are much more connected”, pointing to the vial, “you saw what happened there, when the ring was close. Now imagine what would happen in the Zone. Where not being close to ectoplasm is functionally impossible”.

Maddie furrows her eyebrows a bit, “well then it would just suck it all...”, eyes widening a bit, “in. It would suck everything in”. Oh god. Shaking her head, “but... but you’re here, not there?”.

Danny blinks at her, “um. Mom? Here and the Zone overlap, remember? Me being here doesn’t stop me, or the ring really, from pulling in energy from there. Like I said, more connected. Being here just slows it down”, pointing at the vial again, “normally sapping from that would have taken way longer, but I was making the ring focus on it so you would notice”, rubbing his neck, “since that helped my explanation”.

Maddie blinks, glancing at the ring quickly, “you can do that? Change it’s... effect?”, swallowing, “and, so you just perpetually absorb from the Zone? I- I don’t know what to say or ask about that”, shaking her head, “why?”.

Danny chuckles awkwardly, “I can alter the effect yeah, I can’t stop it though. And yeah, that’s what I do. Or the ring really. And the other piece sheds or expels all that energy back out to the Zone. So it doesn’t stay in me, it just moves through me. Kind of”, rubbing his neck and looking around a little before continuing, “-kind of like a filtrator. The ring pulls everything in, my body siphons out the bad and impurities, and the other piece feeds the cleaned ecto-energy back into the Zone. But also like a heart. Because you know that ‘contamination’ I have? Yeah that mixes in with the stuff I expel out, which makes the ecto-energy stronger”, he then starts gesturing with his hands a little, still not meeting her eyes, “which effectively sustains the Zone and the Zone takes the extra to repair or grow itself”.

Maddie has to cut in at that, “wait wait, so you are actively helping the Zone. Making it stronger. And, and what happens to the ‘bad’ your body’s taking? Is the Zone just using you to fed itself? I still- this doesn’t make sense and this sounds actively bad. And you can’t get out of this without someone killing you. This just makes me want to take that away from you. But I don’t know if that would even do anything”, she clamps her mouth shut to avoid rambling and possibly offending him. Sighing after a beat instead and hopes Danny speaks up before she winds up putting her foot in her mouth.

Danny quirks an eyebrow and actually chuckles slightly, at least she hadn’t offended him. “I’m sort of part of the Zone circulatory and respiratory system yeah. Which a body can’t exactly survive without”. Maddie can’t say she’s exactly bothered by that. She doesn’t want the Zone to ‘flourish’. Why would she! That would just make ghosts stronger. Why was- how was Danny okay with this? Obviously he can tell she’s not impressed. Him narrowing his eyes, “mom, have you ever thought about what the Zone is? Not in the literal ‘home of the ectoplasmic manifestations’, but in the ‘what is the Zone’s relation to Earth’ way”.

Maddie just purses her lips, the Zone was just an alternate dimension that Earth happened to be close to. Sure that dimension was part of the afterlife obviously, but that didn’t really mean anything. But clearly Danny was heavily implying it did mean something. Danny sighs and doesn’t give her a chance to say anything, him shaking his head seeming almost disappointed; which does sting a little. “It’s not some detached plane. It’s intrinsically interconnected”, motioning with his hands, “if you take a coin and flip it in the air, sometimes you’ll get heads and sometimes tails. But regardless of what side you see or what side you’re on, both are still there. And if you, say, try to blow up or dissolve or cut off one side you’ll wreck the whole coin. You can’t have one without the other. If one sides damaged, the whole thing is. If one side has a giant hole, then so does the other. The Zone isn’t just connected to earth either, but the whole universe. Mom, if the Zone goes, everything goes. And the Zone goes if there isn’t someone doing what I am”, tapping the ring again, “I’m a rechargeable battery for the Zone that’s perpetually being recharged, yes. But that isn’t a bad thing. It’s emphatically not”.

Maddie blinks a bit owlishly. That can’t be- but that’s not- how? Is he? How is he even? Maddie can’t help sputtering a bit, “b-but how, how, are you- how can you even be? Sure? H-how are you sure?”.

Danny’s stare is honestly a bit unnerving, “I can feel it just as I can my own body. The Zone is as much a part of my body as I am part of Its metaphorical body. It is effectively an extended part of myself. Every bit of ectoplasm, of ecto-energy, every ghost even; is technically part of me. And-”, Danny pauses before suddenly looking a bit calmer, “I’m overwhelming you, aren’t I?”, looking to the side, “and I didn’t even respond to what I do with the bad I siphon out, did I?”.

Maddie shakes her head a bit stiffly, “no.... but I honestly, forgot. And yeah, this is, a lot”. Danny winces at that before looking back to her.

The two sit in silence for a bit, Maddie’s not really sure where this conversation has gone or what of any of her questions has actually been answered at this point. But she can tell by the way he’s just staring off into space, though it doesn’t look unseeing, that he’s giving her time and that he probably won’t speak back up till she does. She can appreciate that. And he’s probably off... feeling this Zone? How does that even work or make sense?

That’s another thing about Danny, he’s gotten really good at being confusing.

Okay, take stalk of what she knows and the answers she’s gotten here. Danny has a ring that is indeed ghostly, that has to do with ruling/royalty and three other people -at least one being a ghost- had before him; oh and there’s some other item that is paired with it. He destroyed the previous owner, Pariah, but it was all because Vlad is an even worse person than she thought. Which she is now again a bit mad over. What else? Right, the whole ecto-energy of the Zone being filtered through his body thus cleansing it and strengthening the Zone. And the whole spiel he just went on that had something to do with the Zone being part of his body? Which didn’t make sense. And an analogy about coins that somehow means that destroying the Zone just destroys everything. Which, that makes some sense. It was obvious to even a fool the two places were connected, it wouldn’t take much of a leap to suggest that disconnecting them would be catastrophic. And didn’t he say that ghosts were part of him or something? What?

Maddie blinks and bites her cheek, she’s not going to guess how long it’s been now, “okay, so I think I get most of what you’ve said. Hopefully. And I could see how destroying the Zone wouldn’t be exactly good. But the.... you can feel it thing. I don’t- that doesn’t make sense. And how can it be part of your body?”, gesturing to him, “your body’s right here. You’re a solid being. A person”.

Danny looks to her and hums, “well let’s see”, tapping his chin before stilling for a second, then pointing a finger at the scanner, “if you look at me through that I might be able to make it make more sense”. Maddie nods, pulling it back up and looking at him through it. He really looked no different than anyone else who happened to have enough ecto on/in them to shed off energy. Danny hums, “I guess you need something to compare to, to realise what your looking at isn’t normal”. Maddie’s almost offended by that.

Watching him look at his hand for a second before shaking his head and sticking his hand under the table. Producing an actual glob of ectoplasm a second later. “Where did that come from”. No way that was just stuck under the table.

“No where particular”. Maddie squints at him and honestly can’t tell if he’s lying. Though he should know exactly where he got that, he grabbed it. He just points at it so she sighs a little bit directs the scanner to it. Managing to get Danny and the glob in frame and staring. It takes a few seconds to notice the difference. The energy shedding of Danny appeared solid rather than transparent. How hadn’t she noticed that? Muttering, “yours isn’t transparent”.

Danny nods, “exactly. But”, Maddie watches through the scanner as he moves his hand and actually plucks on one of the strands of ecto-energy, it bending with his finger like he was actually touching it. Which was utterly illogical. It was like how you couldn’t literally pluck a ray of sunlight. What he just did, was a literal impossibility. Whispering, “what?”. Which he apparently finds funny and promptly chuckles. Her watching a bit stunned as one of the strands moves and bends to spell ‘I can touch these as easily as hair. And move them as easily as fingers’. She was firmly gobsmacked. “That should be impossible”.

Danny chuckles some more, “you’d be surprised how often I hear that. Like I said all that energy is part of me as much as my fingers are. Though hair would be a slightly better comparison, except you don’t have feeling in your hair. This one-”, she watches him pluck a different strand of energy, it coils around his finger slightly, “-one of the branching off sections is connected to an area of the Zone where there’s a big battle of some kind. I can tell because of how they are moving through the ectoplasm, which is again connected to me. And through the ectoplasm in them, which is also connected to me. If I wanted, I could move that ectoplasm and make them unable to move in an instant”, he chuckles quietly, “but I’m not that mean. I’m kinda big on the bodily autonomy thing”. She’s pretty sure she hears him mutter, “that, and it’s pretty hard... and feels unnatural”.

All Maddie’s hearing is that her son can control ghosts and without even being near them. Immediately she wants to ask why he didn’t do that to all the ghosts that show in Amity, but considering the last bit he said; he’d be really against doing that. But... why? They’re ghosts and the Amity ones are attackers. Why wouldn’t he just stop them if he could? Blinking at him, “why?”.

He looks to her, “‘why’ what? Why I’m oddly impossible. Why siphoning the Zone makes all of it connect to me. Or-”, Danny then gets that hard dangerous look in his eyes, and just feels dangerous; but catching a glance of the scanner she finally knows how he does that, because all the strands and bits of ectoplasm coming off him are vibrating and even lashing. “-are you asking why I’m not ripping away any ghosts bodily autonomy”. Like usual when Danny does this, that entire sentence feels like a threat. She’s a bit grateful right now for having experienced this side of him before.

Maddie swallows, “stop that. And honestly? All of them”, feeling the need to explain herself when his eyes narrow, “it’s just, with all these ghosts that... attack Amity. Couldn’t you just... make them, leave”, swallowing a bit again, “or something”; because damnit, Danny’s intimidation tactics were really good at hitting that part of the brain that just screams at a person that whatever’s in front of or around them is absolutely dangerous. And while she’s proud of him getting bullies off his back, he shouldn’t be doing that to family and he knows that. Both her and Jazz have told him that multiple times, but sometimes it was genuinely an accident.

He stares at her a bit more, with her trying not to shrink in her seat, before looking away and huffing; the feeling alleviating almost instantly. And glancing at the screen, the ecto-energy was back to normal slow waving. Well, almost. For him to do that accidentally at all... it must just be like an instinctive natural response. Which supports Danny’s claim that all this was connected to him. Ectoplasm literally behaved ‘angrily’ if he was angry. That was... so strange but nearly undeniable proof in a way. Which means he absolutely knows what he’s talking about and isn’t just being fed baloney by some ghost. Danny runs a hand through his hair and mumbles a, “sorry”, before looking to her again, “and I guess you do have a point. Though like I said, ghosts are less aggressive towards humans now and that’s my fault. They aren’t generally stupid enough to cause serious genuine problems in the home of- my home”. Maddie absolutely picked up on him cutting himself off from saying something else. Did ghosts have a specific title for him? Though thinking of it, that’s probably rounded back to the ‘royalty’ thing. It was probably ‘king’, ‘prince’, ‘lord’, or something. What? Zone Lord? Dimensional Prince? Or- oh god.

Maddie looking to him a fair bit wide-eyed as he explains her previous sorta questions. “Which is actually partly just respect. Yes ghosts are capable of respect. But fine yeah, some it’s just because they know I can basically smite them”. That doesn’t make Maddie feel better about what she’s currently thinking. “I’m not going to straight-up control their bodies though mom, like I said that’s mean. That would be no better than controlling a human to me. Which, in the interest of honesty”, he points to her arm, looking almost sheepish. While her eyebrows raise as she watches her arm lift up and wave at her entirely out of her control. She can tell how though, she can feel the slight pressure the ecto-energy in the air is exerting on her arm to do this. So it was more like he was grabbing her with the invisible ecto-energy than actually controlling the limb. Danny continuing as her arm comes back entirely under her control, “so no, I’m not going to control ghosts”, shrugging, “I have my other reasons too. The Zone creates ghosts after all, which rather means I do. It’s not an active thing on my part but I can feel it. So in a way, ghosts are a bit like children”.

Maddie blinks, when thinking about Danny that made a weird level of sense. He did seem oddly defensive about ghosts, quick to explain away their actions or claim they weren’t bad. A parent would do that. But... Shaking her head and staring down at the ring, “I wish the Zone wouldn’t make more. No offence. And I don’t know why you’d be okay ‘making them’”, swallowing and meeting his eyes, “but it’s more than that isn’t it”.

“Ghosts aren’t evil. I’ve pointed that out many times”. He continues when she gives a disbelieving huff. “Amity Park just sees more of the rotten eggs. Well okay, I wouldn’t call the Box Ghost a rotten egg. He’d just... stupid and has delusions of grandeur. Maybe a masochistic streak”. That Maddie can agree with. “But they’re all ghosts created under Pariah’s reign. And he was obviously a really bad dude”, fiddling with the ring, “you haven’t met any of the new ghosts”.

Maddie opens and closes her mouth a few times, because he had a point. If he was part of the ectoplasm in these ghosts, it would be logical to assume he had a level of effect on them. Like a parent's genetics when they have a kid or something. So she decides to give him something of a leap of faith, “I guess I’ll try to withhold judgment on the... new ghosts”, thinking on the words he used, “the ones made under your reign”. She can see the moment he realises his wording gave away more than he meant to. Or at least implied something he was likely skirting around. Avoiding. Because well... “Danny, answer me honestly, are you considered their king. The King Of Ghosts or the Zone”. She doesn’t bother making it sound like an actual question. Because she knows both of them know it’s not a question. More a statement of fact. One that she needs to hear him confirm. And if he denies it... then how?

Danny folds his hands in front of his mouth and stares off into space, humming contemplatively. Which he often does when he was acknowledging that she said or asked something but wasn’t choosing to make his opinion known. Which makes her worry he’s going to clamp up. That he’s not going to answer. And now that she thinks about it, didn’t that Pariah ghost have a crown?

Danny nods after a while and gives the simple blunt answer of, “yeah”.

She looks down to the table, “okay”. And doesn’t know what else to say about that. Because, even if she wrote off the ‘my children’ feeling or Danny’s ever-present odd tolerance of ghosts, that has been around way longer than the ring. Then ghosts would still be his subjects. His ‘people’. And a king is supposed to support and protect his people, whether he likes all of them or not. Hell, he could hate them and that still wouldn’t change his role. Sure part of her feels glad or impressed maybe over that since ghosts at the very least reasonably shouldn’t go after their king. Swallowing and speaking at the table, “is it just a... title, or do you have responsibilities. Do you actually rule them”.

“Yeah. I rule them. My word is effectively the highest level of law. The Kings Decrees. But again, I’m not a controlling person. And I don’t ask for much”, she can hear the shrugging in his voice, the forced nonchalance, “I stop wars sometimes. Resolve skirmishes. Hear requests or complaints. My birthday is a Zone wide holiday”. She’s not sure what to make of the weird emphasis on ‘birth’ there. “There’s balls and parties. I have knights and an... army”. She can feel that he hadn’t really wanted to keep talking but did probably because he feels she deserves to know at this point. She put her foot forward. She chased after him. She tried. Both to get to know him and to trust and believe him. Maybe that was all he needed to be open with them, open to a degree at least. And it had taken four years. No. Longer than that. Most of his life.

And how sad was that?

But... Armies and knights. Balls. This was a lot. And he didn’t just work like the Zone’s battery. Wasn’t just being used by it or part of it or however he felt about it. If anything, that was just an aspect of being their king. The real secret, the real revelation, the piece of the puzzle, here wasn’t the ring and what it does. Wasn’t him sucking in and expelling ectoplasm ‘like a filtrator’. It was what that ring represented. It was that her son was the ruler, the king, of the things she hunted and wanted to destroy and study. He fed them, nurtured them, supported them, socialised with them. And they respected and feared him. Maybe followed him. Her and her son's ideals and goals couldn’t be more opposing if they tried.

No wonder he never said anything. No wonder he had become so distant. Now wonder he would oppose or question their hunting and ethics. And no wonder he had the air of a commander and a sense of wisdom to him. He was a king for peat’s sake! That probably comes with the... position. A requirement or learned attribute. And he quite literally had power thrumming under his skin. His power was technically even in the air. It was an entire dimension and species. What is she supposed to do with this? Because this obviously isn’t something he can change. And it’s not even fair for her to even consider asking him for that. And to ask him to treat them like the monsters she considers them to be, would be plain wrong. In fact, wasn’t that what Danny said Pariah had done? And look how well that turned out.

But what did this mean for them? For them as a family? Because she was effectively a person belonging to an outside ‘kingdom’ and species. Who was an aggressor towards his ‘kingdom’. So where did that leave them? Or really, what’s more important to her? Her family or her career. Which was a stupid question with an obvious answer. But still, they were dangerous, they were monsters. Regardless of Danny being their king. Even if he didn’t agree on them being monsters. And maybe she actually genuinely can refrain from judging the ‘new ghosts’ or maybe Danny being ‘part of’ all the ghosts now would make them less dangerous. Maybe even give them a bit of humanity. Danny was human after all. So maybe.., maybe this was actually for the best. For both sides in the war on ghosts. She already knows what he’ll say if she’s brings that up though. He already thought ghosts were just like humans.

Maddie looks back to Danny, who’s just sitting there watching her quietly. Waiting for her to think and decide what to say. Obviously family mattered to him. He wouldn’t even be trying or doing this otherwise. But his ‘career’. He ultimately had to do it. He couldn’t drop it. Her and Jack arguably could. Danny couldn’t put them first. He had to put his ‘people’ first. That’s the job of a king. Even if it hurt or he hated it. Swallowing, “I’m sorry”.

Danny quirks an eyebrow and gives one of his charming lopsided smiles, “for what? You’ve got nothing to be sorry for”.

Maddie blinks at him, a bit dumbfounded, “we, me and your father,  are hunters, Danny. We’re attacking and studying what’s effectively your subjects. And that’s not even mentioning that we never noticed all this till now”.

Danny cuts in, keeping her from saying anything else, “I’m going to stop you there”, leaning forward across the table and patting her hands, “mom, that’s fine. I hid it. If you’d noticed right away that would have been embarrassing. Even more so if you figured everything I just told you out on your own. And as for the hunting”, sighing and giving her hand another pat, “you guys are only going after ghosts that come here and are practically always aggressors. Why would that be a problem? Why would you need to apologise for that?”, Danny leans back while Maddie just blinks and gapes at him, “when you go to another country, you have to follow their laws or the cops will chase you down. It’s no different. If a ghost comes here, they expect to be hunted. Heck, coming to the human world and attacking humans is against Zone law. The Box Ghost is pretty much the only ghost that doesn’t get chucked in jail very frequently. And that’s because he’s viewed as pathetically pathetic there as he is here. And-”, Danny runs a hand through his hair, “-one of my decrees actively allows and supports ghost hunters. So long as it’s after aggressors in the human world anyway”, obviously making a point to give her a serious look, “now if you went into the Zone and started attacking, yeah we’d have ourselves an issue”.

Maddie feels ridiculously touched. He made laws, or just one, that supported her career? “Sweetie I, that- thank you. Are you... sure? That what we do is okay? Okay with you?”.

Danny chuckles and nods, “it’s fine. I might not agree with your opinions, or what you claim as fact, and you know I have sabotaged things before, but it is objectively fine. And personally, of course I support you guys doing what you love”.

Maddie reaches over and grabs his hands, smiling at him, “that means a lot, sweetie. I imagine the G.I.W. are different?”, that was a government organisation after all. Not general hunters.

Danny scowls, and feels a bit intimidating again, “considering they attempted to blow up the Zone, no. And the Anti-ecto acts are a host of issues”, and grumbles off to the side incoherently. Maddie doesn’t doubt that if she checked the scanner that the ecto-energy in the air would be lashing around again. At least it wasn’t being directed at her, reducing the effect.

Maddie blinks at him, leaning back and shaking her head, “wait, would that? Be trying to destroy you?”.

Danny tilts his head and chuckles, “yes and no. The Zone’s part of me, yes, again it’s like an extension of me”, putting a hand to his chest, “my body is more my body than the Zone is”. Maddie nods, glad to hear that. Watching him pat at the blob of ectoplasm that she honestly completely forgot about in lue of Danny being a king amongst other things. Humming at it before looking to her, “and thinking of the ghosts I create, would you like to met a Whisp one?”.

Maddie blinks, what? Well... Whisp weren’t exactly dangerous and sometimes they cropped up naturally even in Amity. But where? Could he just locate one and pull It here? Or more so would he even be willing to do that with the whole bodily autonomy thing? “From where?”, shaking her head a little, “I mean yes, but wouldn’t you have to make one come here?”.

“Ah, hmmm no. I was just going to make one. It doesn’t take much and it happens on accident a lot actually”, and pats the blob of ectoplasm again. Maddie eyeing it, so he could just make a ghost out of chuck of ectoplasm? Just like that? Wait... squinting at him a little, “is that why our samples seem to disappear so often? It’s not Jack?”.

Danny looks a little sheepish and rubs his neck, “yeah, well for the most part at least. Dad does just misplace it sometimes. But it has to do with me always expelling ecto-energy. If enough of that gets absorbed by ectoplasm it can become sentient. Blobs and Whisps generally. SignalShines once. Proper ghosts are a totally different matter though”.

Maddie shakes her head, absolutely a bit stunned. It did make sense though, if he really expelled so much; which he clearly must if he’s ‘the Zone’s heart’ in a way. All of it had to pass through him. Which was still a bit much to know. “Okay. What are SignalShines though?”. Danny chuckles a bit and pats the blob of ectoplasm again, her watching it start misting and leaning a bit over as it, It, twitches and uncurls from the ball into a more proper Whisp shape. Just like that. Watching It promptly wind around his hand and arm. Him lifting that hand up and letting It start nipping at his hair.

“SignalShines can’t survive out of water. There’s not exactly ecto-water in the human world”, chuckling, “I forgot a thing of Gatorade under my bed for a while. It wasn’t Gatorade anymore after a month or so, I can tell you that. There was around forty odd SignalShines in there. They’re very tiny”, moving his hand over to her, the ghost very clearly not willing to let go of him. Was It still feeding off the energy he was shedding? She can’t help chuckling a little at his story though, that did sound like a very Danny thing to do.

Poking the Whisp, It poking her with Its tail tip right back. “You know, this doesn’t really say much”.

Danny shrugs, both of them watching It push his fingers around to wind through them some, “I know. Whisps are practically just vaguely sentient air after all. But well, I figured you’d appreciate some proof. And don’t worry about them biting, little guy won’t with me here”.

Maddie nods and mumbles, “yeah”, while watching Danny’s face a little. She can easily read the soft fondness there. She knew he was ghost tolerant, had known that pretty much since ghosts were proven to the whole town as being real. She just never realised that it went so far beyond just tolerance or ‘getting along’. It was probably different with fully sentient ghosts, what with their pseudo-consciousness and pseudo-personality after all. Not that Danny considered it to be ‘pseudo’ anything. Deciding to do something of a leap of faith and pet the thing with a finger a little. Danny obviously appreciated the effort and Whisps were practically harmless. The most they’d do is nibble on your clothes or fingers.

Though thinking of It being ‘obedient’ and Danny maybe, possibly, giving ghosts a level of humanity. How and why were ghosts even willing to tolerate him being their king? ‘Bowing down’ and being controlled, being sustained/fed, by a human. Ghosts clearly thought they were better or ‘above’ humanity. So why? “Hey Danny?”. He hums at her so she continues, “you’re human, so why are ghosts, this one, willing to be so... submissive to you”. Heck, even with pointing weapons at the things her and Jack have never gotten even a Whisp to be this submissive and cooperative. It hadn’t even attempted to nibble her or screech or anything. Watching It squirm Its way under Danny’s wrist and just stay there.

Danny deadpans, “king”, but immediately chuckles, obviously knowing that’s not what she meant really. “For Whisps like this it comes down to a simple matter of being able to sense all the energy running through me, and how, exactly, it’s running through me. Ghosts can sense my status. They just know. Whisps, and blobs really, will be like this to anyone strong enough in ecto-energy. You two don’t have any due to your suits protecting you, so there’s no reason to be submissive to you. And me, well, I could destroy a Whisp like this as easily as I can make one. And they can tell”, shrugging, “so in a way, it’s a survival instinct. All ghosts are that way. Get something strong enough around them and they’ll bend the knee... or run away. The more sentient though, the less you’ll be able to tell”.

Maddie nods, huffing a little, “pride”. Which Danny does nod over. “That still doesn’t answer my question though. Having the whole Zones worth of ecto-energy or not, you’re still human”. Immediately finding herself on the receiving end of that feeling that Danny knew stuff that she didn’t.

Danny shakes his head a little, “I had a feeling that would be a hangup you’d have. I’ll admit there’s plenty who don’t exactly like me. And there’s some that don’t like or respect me in the slightest. They’re still not dumb enough to go against me though or ignore me if I actually demanded something. Okay, and there’s the Box Ghost, who’s is, well, him. But for the most part, my humanness doesn’t matter. Most don’t care”, chuckling faintly, “I’ve ran into one or two that find it novel actually. Though there are also some who think I should be forced to become a ghost”.

Maddie has to cut in at that, “you’re not and don’t, right?”. She absolutely would not tolerate him being forced to die or some ghost even attempting to kill him. Period.

Danny immediately shakes his head, obviously well aware how much of an issue she’d have with that; the Whisp winding up his arm as he talks, “no. Don’t worry. A couple, ah, older ones tried to push for it but my head knight, called a Dread Knight by the way, didn’t take to kindly to that”, chuckling, “basically swore to obliterate them if they even attempted to attempt it. So no, no ghost’s trying to get me offed, mom. Also-”, smirking slightly, “-trying to is illegal under the Kings Decrees anyway”.

Maddie nods strongly, “good”, she guesses she shouldn’t be to surprised he went and made it illegal to kill him. She’d do that herself in a heartbeat. “And your... Knight’s that loyal to you? Or obedient?”.

Danny purses his lips slightly, “he’s loyal to the crown, not me. He’ll obey whoever’s the ruler with absolute loyalty. It’s his Obsession”. Hearing that did actually make her feel better. A ghost wouldn’t go against their own Obsession. Often even at the risk of destruction. So this ghost being ‘loyal’ and thus ‘protective’ of her son was effectively a guarantee.

Eyeing the Whisp as It seems to be attempting to curl up over his heart, “well I'm glad you’re protected then. I still don’t get how so many could not care that you’re human though”.

Danny sighs, “they just don’t. It’s really not that important to them. Strength matters far more, as well as capability and fearsomeness. And that I have proper claim of course”. Maddie blinks a bit disbelievingly at that. She’s not sure how Danny had any of those first three. Particularly before he got this title. How could a teenager without any experience or training be capable as a king? People raised their whole lives to be royals were frequently terrible at it. And human strength just didn’t compare to ghosts; raw human strength anyway. And fearsomeness? Maddie’s pretty sure the only thing ‘fearsome’ about him is the intimidation thing he can pull, which is thanks to this connection to the ecto-energy that he has.

“No offence sweetie, but I think you’re rather lacking in those departments. Especially compared to ghosts. Also”, looking at the Whisp still snuggling his chest, “what’s that doing?”.

Danny glances down and chuckles, “oh they’re just curious over the heartbeat. No surprise really”, looking back to her, “and mom, I’ve been involved in more than a fair few ghost fights. Even before the king situation, in fact, I get in less now. I’ve never truly lost. Ever. Amity’s kinda crazy like that”.

Maddie shakes her head, “I didn’t realise the school hotspot was that bad”.

Danny shrugs, “I just have bad luck half the time. Wind up with a haunted locker or accidentally dating a ghost without realising it. Her boyfriend was pretty pissed about that. Other situations. And-”, looking her in the eyes, “-you’ve never actually seen scary Danny before. Or really angry Danny for that matter. Mad? Sure. But completely pissed off? No”. That’s honestly enough to make Maddie decide that maybe she’d rather not see that at all.

But still... “I don’t know, Danny. Ghosts following and respecting a human still seems so wrong. Like it shouldn’t be possible”.

Danny just shrugs at her, “well it is what it is. You can take it or leave it really”. Which was a clear sign she wasn’t going to get anything more out of him on the subject. Watching him move to scoop the Whisp off his chest, “you should go now. You’re getting greedy”. So that was a ‘yes’ on It feeding off his shedded energy. Gaping slightly when a small portal just swirls into existence and he sticks his hand through; depositing the ghost directly into the Ghost Zone.

Speaking up as he pulls his -now empty- hand back out and the portal swirls away, “just how many things can you do???”, it was actually a bit unnerving. He had powers. Like a ghosts. Though with all the ecto-energy in him/running through him should she really be surprised.

“Its just manipulating my ectoplasm. Nothing more. Just like when I moved your arm or made the Whisp. All ectoplasm is part of me, so I can do with it what I want”, and shrugs like this is no big deal.

“Could you cover the town in little ghosts like that?”.

“I could yes, but it would be pretty tiring and pointless”.

“What about turn the sky green?”.

“I’ve done that on accident”.

“Telekinetically move things by wrapping ecto-energy around them?”.

“How do you think I clean the lab so fast”.

“Clean things by ecto-radiating the surface? Ectoplasm does destroy pretty well everything after all”.

“I’ve... never actually tried that, but probably”.

“Could you-”, Maddie bites her lip a little, “-transport the town into the Zone like Pariah did?”.

“Yeah. With a little bit of concentration at least. Not that I would”.

Maddie shakes her head a bit to herself. So much power, and all from a title. She decides to be honest, “I’m not sure how I feel about all that”.

Danny shrugs, “that’s fine. I surprise myself sometimes”.

Maddie furrows her brows a little, “but it doesn’t scare you? All of it? The... abilities. Or filtering the Zone. Or the king thing. Or having to deal with ghosts a lot”.

Danny shakes his head and smiles fondly almost instantly, “hardly. I’m content. I’m okay. Don’t worry”. She’s not sure if she should smile back or sigh. Sure he said he was happy, okay, and it looks like he means it. But at the same time, this wasn’t really okay. He could never hope to have a normal human life. Of course it was never going to be normal normal, he was a Fenton after all, but it was never going to be Fenton normal either. And even though he didn’t really touch on it, had downplayed it, he had responsibilities. Probably lots of them. He wasn’t even out of school yet. A summer job was one thing, but what he was doing might be better comparable to the president. Just for ghosts. Which were a different species than him and existed in a different dimension. She’s not even sure how he manages that. And he probably can’t really get any help with it either. She hadn’t known this kind of position even existed before today. And it would be risky at best for him to talk about details, combined with him being on the paranoid side; he wouldn’t seek people out for advice either. Or at least probably not. Could he even have a regular human job really? Heck, being a hunter was absolutely out the window. Maybe she could find some way for him to be in the family business, but it was obvious this king thing came first. And not just because it was ‘more important’.

Danny wanted this. On some level or another.

Which is where the positives come in. He was arguably a better person now, and stronger too. He could clearly stand on his own two legs and was at the point where he probably didn’t need her and Jack as a child would. Which yes, was something to be proud of. And what he’s achieved was arguably impressive, grand, unprecedented. Was, when it came down to it, good. Especially if this made ghosts less violent and dangerous. He himself was clearly proud. In the end, wasn’t that the point? What any parent should want for their child? For them to be proud, successful, and respected? He had all three. Just in an explicitly non-human way.

Looking at him, he was looking off to the side silently. She’d normally guess he was just giving her time to think, which he probably was, but maybe he was feeling? something somewhere. In the Zone or Amity, Amity was pretty horribly contaminated. She couldn’t even blame him for that, there was probably ghosts here as often as some more scarce places in the Zone. Him and his cycling the Zone’s ectoplasm thing almost definitely made it worse though. Maybe she should scan his bedroom sometime? Shaking her head, she definitely wasn’t doing that right now. But eyeing him, she honestly can’t really find anything else to say. Just relaxing and not thinking for a bit might be a good idea.

After a while she glances to the doorway, speaking a bit absently, “sure is taking Jack a while”.

Danny hums and nods, “he’s asleep actually”. Maddie sighs fondly at that, because of course he was. Shouldn’t have let him have that second helping of fudge peanut brittle. Danny looks to her, “so, we’re good?”. Oh god, she’s glad he’s the one to broach that topic again.

Maddie looks him over, eyeing the ring on the table, and nods at him. Fairly easily deciding at this point that it was fine. It was okay. And he was absolutely family. Not that that had ever been genuinely up for debate. “Yes sweetie, of course. I still honestly don’t understand this and I can’t say I really like it. But it’s you, this can’t really be changed and it’s not really right for me to even want you to change this. So yes, we’re good”.

Danny grins and nods, “good”, and moves to grab up the ring off the table. Maddie tries not to feel a little bothered and weird over him slipping it back over his finger. Especially seeing the muscles in his arm and face tense up. Does... does this hurt him?

Danny looking to her as she speaks, “Danny... does that hurt you?”.

Danny chuckles, and it sounds a bit stiff, “I’m honestly surprised you didn’t ask that already”, shaking his head with a slight smile, “mom, an entire dimension follows through my body, that’s unpleasant to adjust to. But I am adjusted, it’s just slightly unpleasant to reconnect properly“.

Maddie blinks, “wait, so you need your two items? Was taking that off bad for you?”. And how did she not think of that sooner? Cluing in that that only made sense. He used the items, as a pair, to filter ecto-energy. It was logical he might actually need both of them on him to do part of his job. But still, she’s pretty sure that was a pained tensing.

Danny wiggles his hand in the air, “‘bad’? No. Just not pleasant and they’re pretty much part of me. More so than other ectoplasmic objects”, Danny tilts his head and smiles at her, “and at this point I think it’s probably obvious the other item is a crown”. Maddie nods, yeah that felt honestly obvious now. Danny gestures to his head, “do you want to see it? Not much point in not showing you”, and chuckles.

Maddie glances at his head, she knows this is a distraction tactic. But she thinks she’s okay taking the bait. She couldn’t change this or do anything about it. And thinking of the footage of Pariah, “is it the flaming green thing Pariah had?”. Danny chuckles more at that and nods. So Maddie makes a point to ruffle his hair, realising she’s probably going through it. Intangible and invisible. That was probably for the best. He couldn’t very well walk around town with a bright green crown on his head. The ring was less... conspicuous.

“Yeah I want to see it”.

Danny smirks a little, a green glowing flaming crown appearing with a bit a fire show. Which Maddie has a feeling he did intentionally, so she rolls her eyes a little at him while eyeing the crown. It was much more in your face and even a bit intimidating compared to the ring. Even if it seemed rather plain and simple if you ignored the fact that it was floating, glowing, and on fire. Green fire. Though squinting a bit, it looked like there might be crystals? or frost? coating it. “Is it... safe to touch?”. Danny nods and leans his head down towards her. Her poking it tentatively and feeling more than a bit surprised that it was ridiculously cold. Frost it was. Which seems as illogical as cold fire. “It’s... cold”.

Danny chuckles and stands up right, and again with the charming smile, “yup. It’s default name is the Crown Of Kings, surprising I know, but under me it’s the Crown Of Cold Fire”. Maddie thinks that’s a little on the nose. Danny lifting up his ring hand, “and the ring’s the Ring Of Suffering”. She’s not sure what to think about that, it was fairly concerning actually; especially considering how literal the crowns name is. Danny runs a hand through his hair, passing under the crown easily, “don’t worry about the names. Anyway, can I go to bed now? It’s a bit past midnight”.

Maddie has to laugh at that a bit, not that she wasn’t tired too, “I don’t think you need my permission, sweetie. And I’ll probably have more questions in the morning, if you want to answer them anyway”.

Danny shrugs, “maybe I will, maybe I won’t. Do try to get some sleep though”. Maddie just nods at that as she watches him head up the stairs, the crown blinking out of visibility as he enters his room and taking away that bright waving glow of its that had been lighting up everywhere around him. It really did change the way he looked, it made him feel almost like he was out of reach. Like she couldn’t really exist in the same space as him. In the metaphorical sense anyway. Which she guesses, is true.

Her looking back to the kitchen, it’s going to take a while to really understand this. And maybe saying something was up with Danny had been an understatement. Her son was a king and effectively a dimension... sorta. He took being weird and unique to a whole different level. A path that she couldn’t follow him down or guide him with. At least his personality made much more sense now. Especially how he seemed as if above people and like people were children to him. Or ghosts more specifically. Because in a way, that actually was the case for him. Though she feels both less and more worried about him now, in more than a few ways. But worrying about him was pointless, and maybe, just maybe, unneeded. It was a bit hard not to though, she was a mother and all; and Danny had gotten himself mixed up in something equal parts important and dangerous. Though she’s really glad to have gotten some honesty from him. Gotten to know him more genuinely. He was clearly still himself, just a different him than the little space crazed little boy he used to be. Which was okay, kids grew up; it was a fact of life. Hers just grew up running full tilt in a direction that should have logically been utterly impossible. He faced life and made himself the king of death. Which... honestly was rather funny and ironic now that she thinks about it. And knowing Danny... he absolutely got a kick out of it. Which makes her smile a little before shaking her head and heading up to be herself.

One thing’s for sure though, she’s so going to have to have a talk with Danny about telling Jack all that at some point.

End.

#ectober #ectober2020 #ectober 2020 #danny phantom #phandom #danny fenton #maddie fenton #reveal #ghost king danny #op danny #fan fic #phan phic #have a fic suck my dick #phantomphangphucker #my writing #late because of crappy internet

[eolewyn1010]

3 seasons of Charité - upsides and downsides

Includes spoilers for all three seasons!

What I like about Charité, season 1:

- Ida is a relatable and stubborn woman, and while I think the protagonists of the newer two seasons are written better and more interestingly, she makes for a good central character

- Behring is great to watch, complex, enthusiastic, arrogant, passionate, desperately forlorn, sweetly encouraging, irascible, honest, and I’m always torn between loving and hating him with all my heart

- he also stands in for how badly society was suited to handle people with psychological issues back in the day

-  actually, none of the characters are simple or one-sided; expectations are often subverted – Behring is not heartless, but he can’t just be “saved” either, neither Koch nor Virchow are as benign as they seem at first, Tischendorf is not the sweet young Prince Charming who’ll give Ida the dream life she deserves, Hedwig is not a brainless little floozie with no deeper thoughts or feelings, neither Therese nor Martha are all the strict boss ladies they want to be, Edith is not just a snotty bitch etc.

- medical history of that time, a blunt look on methods and circumstances

- the rivalry between the doctors; it’s fun to watch them passive-aggressively piss on each other

- the staging of the Tuberculin scandal was really effective, with all the hyping, the downfall and the consequences

- we get sweethearts! Stine is a sweetheart, Else is a sweetheart, Therese is a sweetheart, Dr. Kitasato is a sweetheart, and most of all Dr. Ehrlich. I like kind people, ok? Especially in a setting where so many people are asses

- the music is atmospheric and quite nice

- despite two options of marriage, the female protagonist remains single and gets to focus on her career, even in a time and setting that’s not supportive

- I’m having a blast with Minckwitz – he’s such a bitch, I love it

What I hate:

- the lesbian dies for no good reason

- did our main character really have to be a tragic, left-all-alone orphan in debts? Would you like some cheese with that whine?

- the big, hammy speeches get on my nerves after a while

- my sweet lesbian Therese dies, awfully, of frickin’ tuberculosis

- say what you will, Ida and Behring could have made it work; I think they would have been good for each other. Kinda disappointed

- Else Spinola deserved better

- poor Therese dies, thinking that God punishes her for being in love with Ida

- those weird slo-mo shots between scenes don’t serve any purpose

- what’s with the random fortuneteller scene? What was that good for?

- THERESE DIES! We go with f***king Bury Your Gays??? F*** YOU!

_________________________________

What I like about Charité, season 2:

- Anni and Dr. Sauerbruch – different than with Ida, we get two focal characters who aren’t presented as doubtlessly morally good. On the contrary, Anni starts out as quite the happy-go-lucky little Nazi follower – and then we get all the character development; hell yeah!

- Anni chooses to keep and raise her disabled baby herself, come hell or high water; damn, she fights for that kid. And Martin is positive disabled representation, too – thanks for giving me a handicapped veteran who’s not a bitter, drunk wreck just whining about what a cripple he is! He’s got a grip on his life, and the leg only ever comes up on three occasions; it doesn’t define him

- Otto, Martin, Doc Jung, Margot, Maria Fritsch and Kolbe are more clearly positive characters, but they aren’t one-sided, either – like, Otto plays that bright sunshine, but there’s so much seething in him. My sweet baby boy

- same for the negative characters, because they aren’t flat either; Artur, de Crinis and Christel are super interesting, all different levels between quiet, only semi-aware compliance and full-on, not-so-blind fanaticism. Gawd, those shitheads, but they’re fascinating to watch

- all them relationships – Margot-Ferdinand, Otto-Martin, Otto-Anni, Artur-Anni, Margot-Doc Jung, Ferdinand-Doc Jung, Anni-de Crinis, Bessau-Artur, Martin-Christel, Otto-Christel, Anni-Martin… there are so many interplays, so many dynamics that influence each other! SO many layers!

- the acting is better, I think; the characters altogether feel less wooden, much more human than the first time around – perhaps because it’s not 19th century manners anymore now, I dunno; I’m getting really emotional over shit, and I love it

- incorporation of the political and social situation into the hospital setting – much more than in the first season, the state ideology influences the way the doctors can do their work, and many of them do their best to still hold onto their duty when everything around them falls apart, which is beautiful

- power struggles between the characters in charge and ideological / political nuances are more subtle; nothing is black and white

- but there’s nothing subtle about the presentation of Nazi crimes and how many people actually just went along willingly – that cold bluntness is just what that subject needs

- interactions with patients are better this time; they’re more now than passive, pitiable creatures who quietly die their way, they’re characters with their own minds and drives (Lohmann, Magda Goebbels, Hans von Dohnanyi, even Emil)

- the music is even better than the first time around, I love it – so gentle most of the time, but it can also really help to build the tension

- we get a very sweet, functioning queer romance between characters who consist of more than “well, they’re gay and it troubles them”, and they both live – THANK YOU for learning your lesson; there was no good reason to have the gay character die, so Otto and Martin get a happy end. Was that so difficult?

What I hate:

- Yrsa von Leistner is so effing random. Who the hell wrote this? If you can’t incorporate a character properly, why bother including them in the first place?

- the passivity and anonymity of the disabled children – why didn’t Artur or Anni ever get to perceive one of them as a person? That girl Traudel for example, Anni could have talked to her

- there’s a slight tendency to “I’ll just tell the character next to me” exposition – Artur when he and Anni wake up together that one morning (why wouldn’t Anni know yet what he’s working on? That long-winded explaining sentence just came off as awkward), Peter Sauerbruch to Margot about the Dohnanyis and Bonhoeffers

_________________________________

What I like about Charité, season 3:

- I’m all pro ProPro! Honestly, that man is a treat, both how the character is written and how the actor carries the situations and interactions he’s in. He’s arrogant and narcissistic, but he’s also principled, insightful and caring, unpolitical in a smart way and honest in a quiet way, and he gets how people are, and his mentorship of Ella, how he supports and encourages her and also bluntly gives her the dressing-down she needs, is a thing of beauty. And that she has to earn his attention first

- I have a personal soft spot for the scene where ProPro is doing his sports and going jogging while talking with Ella, and then just has her run along. That man’s hilarious, I love him

- Ella’s spirited, and while I don’t love the protagonists of this season as much as those of the second, she’s still great in her own right – the dedication to her research, the strength with which she handles the shit that’s thrown at her

- everyone’s so snarky!

- the wider focus on medical history and research; we see a lot past surgery now

- everyone’s taking shit in stride – staff is running off to the West? Ok; rest gets double shifts. We don’t have a senior doctor on the ward this morning anymore? We do shit ourselves. An illness we’re not prepared to treat anymore because, actually, there should be vaccination enough? We’ll make do. I love that spirit

- positive disabled representation! Rapoport’s daughter actually interacts with people, is presented as a person, has dreams and strengths and can handle her issues – yes, please!

- we get an intersex character, not for long and the story isn’t treated with the care and attention it should have, but props for the effort, I guess

- the setting allows for Ella to focus fully on her work and passion, not really giving much on romance and marriage without that seeming out of place – Ida’s conversations most often revolved around a man, Anni was considered a Nazi role model for being married and a mother, but Ella, while the relationship with Kurt is an option, never prioritizes this and never needs it

- personally, I’m smelling threesome subtext between Ella, Kurt and Alex Nowack – that may just be me, but I like it

- how everyone handles situations, how the changes happening in the country are incorporated into the world the characters live in, how they are able to cope with stuff and make decisions, in the end even without shifting blame

- even more so than in season 2, I really like how human the patients and their relatives are, that interacting with them in the right way is made an important part of the doctors’ work, even when some of the patients are asses

What I hate:

- people are mumbling – it’s not dialects, it’s not accents; they’re mumbling. They never were in the first two seasons

- the cancer stories were really no favorite of mine; what’s with the teary melodrama and the sudden gory shock value? Come on, Charité, you can do better. Presenting the human side of everything has always been the strength of this series, so why going so overboard now?

- I dunno, the crime cases ProPro investigates don’t seem to be incorporated that well? I suppose they’re there to establish his main field of pathology, but they spend a lot of time on that “Biter” case, and I’m not sure why

- would have been nice if Inge Rapoport had gotten to interact a bit with important characters other than her husband, Arianna and Kraatz – she’s a lovable, strong female character; why keep her so one-sided?

- what’s with the black’n’white painting? You showed us how conflicted and nuanced people under the Nazi regime could be; why now the clear line between “those people are good” and “that one sold his soul to the Party”?

- you show us an intersex person, introduce her as a character, make us sympathize, show us her hindrances and possibilities – and then she’s just gone? What about her treatment? Positive development? Making Kraatz’ interactions with her a counterpoint to his interactions with Doc Rapoport? What WAS that?

#Charité #personal opinions #comparable review #Charité at War #Charité season 3

[juiceboxman]

Thoughts on the Snyder Cut of Justice League

Watched the Snyder Cut a few days ago, here are my thoughts. SPOLIERS AHEAD:

1) Characters are presented WAY better. Batman is less goofy, Wonder Woman has more kick ass scenes, as does Aquaman. Snyder REALLY got Mera right, woman straight up nearly gave Steppenwolf an aneurism which I applaud Snyder for showing because it shows how much of a BOSS Mera is. Cyborg has an actual story arc which is great. Flash is still quite awkward but he has a good heart so once you get used to his awkwardness he’s pretty good

2) All the footage is original Snyder film plus reshoots he done. You can tell which is reshoots depending on quality of CGI and Green Screen. Martian Manhunter was very obviously one of these editions, which I’ll get to later. Most of Whedon’s scenes are gone, which is good for the most part cause outside of the ethical issues that taints those films with Whedon’s behaviour on set, they just straight up conflict with the tone. So less quippy jokes and weird creepy scenes (like the one where Martha was talking how Clark referred to Lois as “the thirstiest girl he’s ever known” like...have you met Clark Kent? What on gods green earth would make you think he would say ANYTHING like that let alone to his MOTHER??? Also that weird scene where Flash was lying on top of Wonder Woman, cause Whedon is weird) however there was one scene (with Bruce and Diana touching the mouse at the same time) which felt quite Whedony. One scene I would have liked to see that would have gotten kept in was Batman’s whole “save one person” speech to Flash. Think that solidified Batman as a veteran hero and makes him look like a person who actually wants to help people rather than punch people, which a lot of batman writers tend to forget to mark on. Without that, nobody gives Flash any guidance in this film and I was disappointed in that

3) Cyborg was great. His powers are clearly and well defined, honestly the way Zac presented his abilities made this dude look super scary. But he has a good heart and Ray Fisher CRUSHES IT. Honestly when Victor teared up in the car with his mum, I was sold. Like this big charismatic quarterback being brought to tears...you just don’t see that in a lot of films, with men typically being presented so stoic and tough. I’m glad we got to see that. Fisher is a fantastic actor and I’m happy he got way more scenes in this movie. Hope to see his Cyborg show up again some day

4) Movie looks stunning. Snyder really has a great visual style. Like the whole scene where Vic is playing football is just gorgeous. Also the Flash’s powers look really cool, love his running scenes

5) I don’t think Martian Manhunter should have been in the movie. Narratively doesn’t really fit and it creates some serious plot issues within the universe. Questions like “why didn’t he do anything in MoS?” Or “why didn’t he do anything in BvS?” having him in this movie kind of feels off. Like how he imitated Martha to give Lois a pep talk, like thats a very serious moment for Lois- do you not think she’s going to bring that up with the real Martha??? Also, the ending with Martian Manhunter was just so weird. Like just showing up to say “Good job, Bruce. Oh, here’s my superhero name. Call me!” felt quite fan servicey and the CGI for him looked bad imo. Think in future should try full body makeup if they wanna do Manhunter in the future

6) I don’t think the Cut had to be four hours, there was just a lot of pretty shows, a lot of slow motion (seriously, like way too much slow motion. Reminds me of that bit from Garth Mangenari’s Darkplace where they talk about how because episodes were 8 minutes shorter than they should have been they just made everything non dialogue slow motion to drag out the time) and a lot of information is repeated. Think with a good editor this could be cut down to three hours, which I think would make a more concise and better film

7) Villain’s are more compelling. Steppenwolf is more interesting, we actually get to see some Darkseid and I think Snyder does a great job at showing the threat level they pose. Also actually gives a reason why Darkseid is interested in conquering earth, which is pretty neat. All in all the lore in the movie is pretty tight

8) I don’t buy how Superman will turn evil. Like you’re telling me this good little farmer’s boy loses his fiancee and then decides to nuke the world? Nah, I don’t buy it. I would however have bought it if the resurrected Superman showed some emotional development complications. Which I initially thought they were going for as Clark had issues remembering who he was, but after five minutes he was back to normal so crisis averted. Shame cause I think that would have been interesting, see a Clark Kent who on paper is the same guy but now he has no empathy. Would have been really tragic and would have shown the price of ressurection

9) I would have liked an explanation in the movie as to why Superman had a black suit. I know Snyder has said in interviews about how the suit is a call back to his homeworld, because at the time of its destruction everyone was basically dressed in black. However there’s no explanation as to why t is this case in the movie. In the comics, Superman had to wear the black suit because it was part of the ressurection procedure. Not so much in the movie, another case of fan service that didn’t make much sense

10) Epilogue stuff was interesting. At that point in the end I felt like Zac was just pitching movies. We get Ben Affleck’s Batman movie with Deathstroke. We get this super weird apocalypse movie with a rag tag justice league which I would honestly love to see. Also throughout the movie you get a lot of set up for the Flash’s movie, referencing the time stuff so I think that if the Flash movie ever gets out of development hell it’ll be Flashpoint. A lot of it did feel a tad fan servicey. Snyder said he put the joker in there at the end cause Ben and Jared never played off one another, seeing them on screen together I think Jared is definitely the perfect Joker for Affleck’s Batman. Think he could dial it down a little- like don’t be sending used condoms or rats to you co-stars please and then years later denying you ever did that shit

All in all, the movie was too long but I found myself enjoying it quite a lot. Fare better than the Frankenstein movie Whedon and WB cut together four years ago. I really don’t think they should have rushed into Death of Superman story so quick, or try to rush into a shared universe quite like in BvS either. That said if you don’t like Snyder’s style, you’ll probably not like the film. I personally like his style and I really enjoyed it, though I can admit it is a bit flawed.

Its actually quite remarkable that this movie got made in the first place. I think if it wasn’t for the massive fan pushback and the fact that a worldwide pandemic occurred, this movie would have still been a pipe dream. I don’t think we’re getting any of the movies pitched in Snyder’s epilogue. 

Like this movie going to streaming is not going to break even the $70 million dollars pumped into it and the audience that wanted this movie in the first place is too small to justify making more movies like this. There’s also the fact that WB put little to no money in marketing for the movie, so they’re trying to bury it for whatever reason. Like most people had no idea this movie was happening, but they know about all the Star Wars and the Marvel Shows. That’s bad marketing and you can’t help but feel its deliberate

In conclusion, I really liked the movie. I thought Zack did a great job under the circumstances and I’m glad he got to finish it. I know he had to step back because of a family tragedy so I’m really happy he got to finish his movie

#justice league #zack snyder #snyderverse

[pinkysfaultorbrainsfault]

pinky and the brain - s1e2: of mouse and man

episode summary: brain needs money to build a perpetual answering machine to occupy everyone in the world for long enough for him to take over. to do that, he needs an absurd amount of money, so he decides to get a job in an office!

and then fake a nondairy creamer accident that turned him into a mouse, because as we all know, brain has to take the most dramatic path he possibly can in life, or he dies.

the rundown:

we open with pinky showing off his ass.

PRODUCED BY PETER HASTINGS. i assume that means the episode, and not the ass. the ass was initially produced by pinky’s parents and then helped along by the warner brothers’ dietary experts for their. mouse actors.

brain isn’t feeling it right now.

instead, as he plucks a rib from the lab’s anatomical model of a human being, and uses it to unpick his cage, he angsts - WRITTEN BY PETER HASTINGS - he angsts over the Dark Side Of Man, that has built war machines and pollution spilling factories and

VOICEMAIL.

😱

as pinky continues to stick his ass out (though onlyfans wouldn’t be launched for another twenty one years) brain runs through his latest plan, which, of course, involves voicemail.

look at those wiggles. this is a rough draft episode.

anyway brain intends to reroute all telephone conversations into his confusing, recursive, voicemail service that, he claims, will keep the human race occupied for “at least seventy two hours.”

“more than enough time for a well prepared mouse to seize control of the planet.”

“i see! so all we need now is a well prepared mouse.”

I???????

HOLY FUCK

brain is unhappy. i am not surprised.

“i am a well prepared mouse, pinky.”

“oh. well. there you are, then.”

unfortunately this plan comes with the pitfall that it will cost.... one million, six hundred and fourteen thousand dollars. which is a lot of money, or, as pinky puts it, “a lot of money!”

as brain wonders about how to raise these funds (”without running for congress”) pinky pinkys off to watch some tv.

HAVE YOU BEEN INJURED IN AN ON THE JOB ACCIDENT

YOU MAY BE ENTITLED TO HUNDREDS, THOUSANDS, EVEN ONE MILLION SIX HUNDRED AND FOURTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS IN COMPENSATION

LENNY PARVIK GOT ME TWO HUNDRED AND ELEVEN DOLLARS

EVEN THOUGH I’M NOW NINETY PERCENT FUDGE, IT’S OKAY BECAUSE LENNY PARVIK GOT ME ONE HUNDRED AND FOURTY TWO DOLLARS SIXTEEN CENTS AND SOME CHANGE

<LOUD, INCREDIBLY DISTRESSED CRYING>

hm.

“pinky, are you pondering what i’m pondering?“

“i think so, brain, but i get all clammy inside a tent.”

anyway so brain’s new plan is to get a job, stage a

HIDEOUS ACCIDENT

and then sue them for one million, six hundred and fourteen thousand dollars in workers compensation.

this episode also has a lot of faces. god, but these mice are so bloody cute. youtube has not yet been invented, but one day it will be, and all brain has to do is sit in front of a camera and nom some corn and go O:O with his face, and everyone will be crying over him within minutes.

it’s so sad that he doesn’t know that.

but for now, he has a job interview to go to. good luck, brain! can’t be any worse than that time allsaints forgot about me and the manager acted like it was my fault.

“impressive credentials. you’re certainly qualified. are you married?”

“oh, yes, i have a lovely wife and two beautiful young children.”

“oh that’s too bad. we’re looking for someone who has no life. thank you.”

as family man walks off, dejected, in comes a completely unsuspicious fellow looking for an honest living honest living, just like in rent the musical.

his arm is acting up, a bit, but it’s fine.

“very impressive resume. princeton, harvard, six years in the industry-- tell me, mr brain, what are your long term career goals?”

“i plan on taking over the world.”

“you have drive! i like that! but confidentially, taking over the world is my job, hahahaha.”

”yes. haha. ha.”

”now. brass tax - are you married?”

“i do have a roommate. but he’s very busy with his own activities.”

HA HA HOO HOO HOO

<muah>

HAHA

“but. one more thing. about your head. isn’t it rather small?”

“no. not for my race.”

“no! no, of course not-- and your people are such... good... cooks... with their tiny heads, uh. please. excuse me for one second.”

“carol! send everyone else home! i got myself a minority person!”

BRUH I?!??!?!?!?!

anyway. brain gets the job.

“mr brain! welcome to the world of re-reinsurance!”

he’s delighted.

back at the labs, he plots his untimely demise at the hands of re-reinsurance,

stating the accident “could be bluffed by altering the mollecular matrix through a substrate platform of microwaves.”

pinky’s response to this is “look brain, i made a choo-choo.”

“oh, and me without my video camera!”

in simpler terms, he explains to pinky that he will stage an accident, “utilising the microwave oven and the non-dairy powdered creamer.”

“because”, to pinky’s apparent horror, “nobody really knows how a microwave works.”

“but why the powdered creamer, brain?”

“nobody knows how that works either.”

(and then, i guess, there’s a scene where some guys jump him on the train for some reason,

i’m only putting it here because this guy is like “oh, you’re funny, you’re a regular gallagher”

and brain’s like “you think gallagher is funny?”

):

anyway then he ties the dude into a pretzel and throws him off the train.

bonk. it adds nothing, but it’s very funny.)

“this is your cubicle right here. if you need any office supplies, ask the office manager and she should have them over in two or three months.”

it’s brain’s first day at work! his boss reads him the company policy on

vacations, personal phone calls,

and sexual harassment.

“don’t worry about it. you’re safe if you avoid all contact with other humans.”

“my goal in life.”

as brain unpacks the things that pinky has packed for his “home away from home,

awwwww.

his nosy cubicle neighbour inquires about brain’s “pet mouse,”

elaborating that he keeps mice! haha! to feed to his pet snake!

to be fair this is also me around snake people. more understandable in brain’s case, being that he is, actually, a mouse, and i am a human person who may be slightly obsessed with tiney small flofys.

;u;

(they play tennis on their lunch break and brain sets him on fire, so it’s not too bad.)

upon his return from the office, pinky, who has dolled himself up to the nines, presents brain with a Yummy Dinner of Food Pellets With Food Pellets.

i will say i think it’s really cute how this show keeps pushing the narrative that pinky just really, really wants to be an old timey housewife. he just spends his time watching i love lucy (when Fish TV isn’t on) and stuff like that and he’s just obsessed with the idea of dusting something alluringly but ineffectively and making brain little dinners.

and it’s so fucking cute!!! what??? it’s adorable. as soon as they get the world pinky better get a little dollhouse kitchen room with lime green everything and a functioning oven.

“please, pinky. i’ve had a very tough day.”

“oh, you have? you’ve had a tough day?”

“what about my day, brain? we always hear about your day, but what about mine?!”

“DO YOU EVER ASK WHAT I DID TODAY???!”

“very well pinky. what did you do today?”

“i don’t remember.”

“anything?”

“not a thing.”

“well, now i know how american gladiator stays on the air.”

the next day, at work, brain is vexed by the fact that nobody has refilled the coffee machine.

“sorry. that’s my fault. hey, you’re cute.”

“you know what they say. big ears. big earmuffs.”

.....okay.

unfortunately brain’s mechanical arm chooses now to malfunction.

she’s into it?

brain maintains that it was a mistake, and he doesn’t find her attractive at all, because brain knows how to talk to women.

she is no longer into it.

horrified by his semi-accidental fuckboy behaviour, brain heads out as quickly as he can, only to be immediately called into his boss’ office.

despite brain’s claims that “the young lady appears to have misunderstood me,” which i’m sure will hold up well on twitter,

mr boss man reveals that he has done some fact checking, and there is no record of brain attending harvard or princeton.

“oh.”

he is given the ultimatum that he either produce his diplomas, or HIS CAREER IN RE-REINSURANCE IS OH OH OVER!!!

very sad!

looks like it’s time to stage a workplace related accident.

he pours the creamer everywhere, discards his suit, and runs up to plonk himself merrily into the pile.

ahem.

HELP, HELP. A TERRIBLE  OCCUPATIONAL DISASTER. I’VE BEEN MAIMED BY AN ON THE JOB ACCIDENT REQUIRING MASSIVE WORKERS’ COMPENSATION.

as others in the office crowd around to look, brain makes his dramatic reveal.

“i’ve been turned into a mouse!”

COLLECTIVE GASP.

obviously mr boss man won’t pay that kind of money.

so, as brain emphatically tells him, I’LL SEE YOU IN COURT.

conclusion:

as the goodfeathers sit on justice’s head, and bitch about jury duty,

The Man From Washinton asserts that brain’s claim that he is a mouse is preposterous.

good thing brain has xrays to prove it! they “clearly” define his “mouse skeleton!” wait a sec and he’ll grab them.

oh shit! where they go?

(”there really is only one conclusion here.” says a local doctor.

“this man is a mouse.”

“then i’m afraid the only conclusion here, doctor,”

“is that you have never seen these.”

“i trust this might keep you quiet.”

“it might.”)

(BRUH/???????????????) (if boss man is out here bribing people with lingerie, he could have tried that way before this got to court.)

egged on by the lack of evidence in Mouse Corner, christopher walken produces the artefacts from brain’s office cubicle.

“i ask you, when was the last time you heard of a mouse winning a bowling trophy?”

“ugh. pinky.”

“yes?”

turns out pinky is here because “they’re not covering this on court tv,” but does advise brain that “it’s a good thing they didn’t find the mechanical suit, eh, brain?”

oh shit.

“pinky, you must go to the office and get that suit from the kitchen closet. do you understand? if they find that we’re sunk.”

“oh! brain! you want me to help!”

off he goes!

fall mouse. bonk.

(he sneaks into the snack delivery.)

(poit.)

(unfortunately, he gets delivered straight to the vending machine.)

(”narf? ):”)

“well. yes. i had noticed his... small, furry head, but i assumed that was normal for his people.”

“and what people would that be.”

“i’m not sure? i think they’re from europe?? maybe france.”

“the size of my head and whether i was a man before the accident is not the question, here. the fact is i am now a mouse.”

(meanwhile, at fiero:

“try the fruit rollups. they’re yummy.”

“oh, i am doing well. poit.”)

“so how exactly did the accident happen, mr brain?”

“some bizarre thing involving a microwave oven? i don’t know exactly-- no one really knows how they work.”

“incorrect! in the oven, a magnetron produces microwaves which cause water molecules to align, and reverse alignment, producing heat, and not mice.”

“the accident also involved a.... nondairy powdered creamer.”

“ah. um. oh.”

(meanwhile,

pinky attempts to drive.)

“mr brain, in your experience with other mice, are they intelligent?”

“no.”

“exactly. your honour, i contend that mr brain is simply too intelligent to be a mouse.”

oh dear.

(meanwhile,

pinky tries not to get hit by a car.)

“but-- no, noo, i’m not intelligent.”

“i am a simpleton! yes. like any average mouse!”

“um. narf.”

that’s mean, brain, considering the aforementioned narf is on his way to save your gay little ass right now, but whatever.

“so you would have no problem with me saying that albert einstien was a champion surfer.”

“what-- i mean, no.”

“or that the temperature of the sun is a comfortable seventy degrees fahrenheight.”

“i wouldn’t know--”

“or that the fermi-dirac’s distribution function is a soup kitchen?”

“that’s preposterous! your honour, the fermi-dirac's function is, for any system of identical fermions in equilibrium,”

“the probability that a quantum state of energy -- E -- is occupied!”

“my word, man! don’t you know your quantum statistics!”

heck.

bonk.

“oh, blunder.”

and what a blunder indeed! the judge decides to rule that brain’s intelligence proves that he is “not a mouse, and that being the basis for your claim, i now dismiss charges against fiero and company.”

“.....very well. i’ll go now.”

“i’m afraid not. i find you guilty of fraud, perjury, and appearing naked in a public place. take him away.”

good thing they have human man sized handcuffs for this human man! brain looks incredibly perturbed, despite the fact he could probably swim in them. and also that he... kind of lives in a prison anyway, if you think about it. oh, cool, can’t wait to evade that cage so i can go live in my other cage.

hm.

luckily, pinky arrives to save us all from that particular moral quandry.

“i got the suit, brain! i got it!”

“pinky--”

the police attempt to intercept pinky,

so he knocks them over. hoo hoo.

brain falls over,

attempts to enter the suit through the shoe,

and is squoshed for his crimes.

faced with a veritable army of police, at this point,

pinky activates the emergency protocol,

says blue lives scatter,

and fucks off out of the courthouse.

we stan a legend.

unfortunately brain got a fair few ouchies during his prison break, so pinky bandages him up. it’s very cute.

anyway, i’m giving this one to brain, on account there were, yknow, a fair few ways that could have been mitigated. fiero fucked him over, though, so i’ll give him that.

brain: 5 ½ pinky: 6 ½ outside influence: 10

 “egad, brain! brilliant!”

“but isn’t that horribly illegal?”

“............yes.”

#patb #pinky and the brain #this took so long lol #BUT THIS EPISODE WAS REALLY GOOD #IT GOT AWAY WITH SO MUCH BRO I ....

[threelivesthreeworlds]

@mcheang said   :    First off, I wouldn’t say Jiheng was abandoned by the demon clan so much as she abandoned them when she left them to pick up the pieces of the botched wedding. She knew she would be exiled and chose to run away anyway. Second, it was never really stated that Dong Hua would stop visiting her after he was married. He would still have to check on the poisoned daughter of his trusted general and make sure she survived.

The admins always think of a few quotes to go in each essay as textual evidence, and admittedly with these next few quotes the previous essay would’ve likely been more complete - we just don’t want to overload our audience with paragraphs and paragraphs of text. So, let’s consider this the Ji Heng Essay, Pt. 2, feat. some Interesting Narrative Foils / Parallels, because I think we don’t actively recognize how similar Ji Heng can be to our leads, and I think sometimes we have to directly look at that and to look within ourselves to figure out why we let our favorite characters off, but we go hard on Ji Heng forever. You’ll have to bear with me - this carries a lot of extra analysis of the text per point addressed, but I believe a somewhat more thorough exploration is required.

TW SUICIDE MENTION, TW DUB CON MENTION, TW GASLIGHTING, for mention of certain canon events, proceed with caution

TO THE FIRST POINT, we have to address, in further detail, what happened after Ji Heng ran away from the wedding. When Xiao Yan tells Feng Jiu about the story Ji Heng told him of what’s happened since they went their separate ways, he does say that she stayed away from the demon clan of her own accord:

Feng Jiu massaged her shoulder, and looked a touch confused: "What does that have to do with Princess JI Heng?"

Xiao Yan was even more confused. "Did I never tell you, that when Ji Heng ran away with that little guard Minsu, they eloped to Fanyin Valley?" He scratched his scalp, the face as beautiful as autumn flowers under the moon touched with a tint of red: "Actually, I only found out half a year ago. All this time, Ji Heng's true love Minsu was a girl who was dressed as a man, and she liked her brother. After she figured that out, Ji Heng couldn't deal with the shock and fought with Minsu, and they separated, but she felt that she was too embarrassed to return to the demon clan, and so she stayed in Fanyin Valley to be the court musician."

However - later, at the end of the book when Chonglin goes to ask the Red Demon Clan about Ji Heng and where she is, he gets this answer:

When Chonglin went to meet with the Red Demon Clan, Lord Xuyang said that after the incident three hundred years ago when his sister ran away with Minsu, the Red Demon Clan had already banished her, and Ji Heng had no contact with the Red Demon Clan since then. Their clan could not tell where she was now.

If anything, then, I think it would be considered a mutual abandonment. For, drastically different reasons, I might add. Ji Heng’s reasons for staying away from home appear to be pride - that she ran away with someone who ended up not being in love with her, who ended up to be lying to her this whole time. That she’s become “pitiful,” because she didn’t follow through on the marriage her brother arranged for her even if she didn’t want it, and now she’s unhappy. Put yourself in her shoes for a minute - and because Admin Ro is both Asian the queen of analogies, imagine that you’ve decided against everyone’s wishes in your family that you were going to be an actor. They all told you you’re going to starve, and, what do you know, they were right. You are in fact out of work and poor. Would you go home, to a chorus of I-told-you-so? To a chorus of people more pleased that they’re right about you than they are willing to support your dream and what you want to do with your life?

Along that vein, her brother’s motivations for banishing her are likely more political. He arranged Ji Heng’s marriage to Donghua because he wanted the political ties to Heavenly Realm. And, in the aftermath of the elopement, in all likelihood he’s trying to disown Ji Heng as fast as possible to avoid it being a reflection on him / his clan, so they don’t get into trouble with either Donghua Dijun (who, by all means should’ve been humiliated by this turn of events) or Jiu Chong Heaven. He does not support his sister’s decision, and in fact, does not want to even be seen supporting his sister’s decision.

Now, food for thought, okay - take a moment and compare that to Feng Jiu, who’s had a very similar narrative. When Feng Jiu goes after someone she loves, going so far as to become a maid, pretend to be a fox, and, basically lose all face for Qingqiu, and he turns out not to have loved her and he turns out to hurt her, what happens? She goes home, to friends and family that do love her. That do support her and have shown support for her, all this time. She has a family who’s waiting for her to go home, who’ll be shields for her, as Zhe Yan says, who she trusts because they’ve always been there for her, over political obligation sometimes. The Bai Family “help their family, not the one that’s in the right.” And let’s take a look at what happens when Feng Jiu runs away from a wedding okay - she blows Cang Yi’s whole palace apart, and yes, she gets punished for this but it’s no more drastic than, likely, being locked in the cave or being spanked. Her family doesn’t disown her because she lost face or because she made a political blunder.

The fact that fandom in general holds these two women to very different standards in this very similar event despite them both being just women who’re trying to run away from a political marriage they don’t want - is concerning. But that fact notwithstanding - from just these two different environments, it’s not hard to see why, in the face of certain decisions, Ji Heng and Feng Jiu make different choices. Now, as a person, I firmly believe no matter what your situation is you make your own choices. So, it’s still on them, as to what choices they make when faced with yet again, a similar situation: not being loved by the person they love. But, with any amount of compassion, you can see, very clearly, why it’s more likely and easier for Ji Heng to make the bad choice. She hasn’t had a particularly large amount of strong relationships in her past, familial or otherwise, that shows her what a good, healthy, strong relationship is like. There is no reference point.

One might argue that Donghua’s just the same, since he has had no real parents and he isn’t close to his foster family. Well, that’s just it - out of this void, where his close relationships are supposed to be, Donghua doesn’t do any better either. In fact, he screws up just as much. Now, I can’t weigh “threatening to kill yourself unless your crush divorces his wife” and “lying to your crush and changing their memories so that they forget everything bad you’ve ever done and sleeping with her using a whole different identity” against each other on a scale of, which is worse. Because they’re both bad, and it’s both toxic in a relationship - but, it seems as though the fandom in general judges them differently as well. 

With Donghua, we seem to be more capable of admitting that the things he does are mistakes. We seem to be more capable of saying “it’s because he doesn’t know what he’s doing, it’s because he hasn’t had any experience, it’s because of xyz.” We seem to be capable of understanding that his flaws are flaws, but that Donghua is not a fundamentally evil character and these flaws don’t fundamentally define who he is. We seem to be capable of liking him and forgiving him for his flaws overall. Whereas, with Ji Heng, the general trend I and Admin Lins have seen is to dislike her, even though these two characters screw up the same amount, and, I mean, for similar reasons and to a similar scale. 

And while I’m not saying people can’t dislike the characters they dislike - I think we have to to evaluate ourselves and ask ourselves the question - why is it that we are capable of forgiving Donghua for what he does, but we aren’t capable of forgiving Ji Heng? Why is it that we would rather assume that Donghua is a good person and that he isn’t making these decisions because he is bad, but we aren’t capable of the same assumptions for Ji Heng? 

One of Donghua’s major flaws is carelessness - and that lead us TO THE SECOND POINT. When Donghua leaves the valley with Feng Jiu, Ji Heng catches up and asks to be taken with them. His response implies that Ji Heng’s condition was not really a concern to him at that moment: 

A flash of surprise entered Ji Heng's eyes, but her gaze was full of hope as it directed toward Dijun. Donghua said coolly: "Living in Fanyin Valley will control the Quishui poison. If you live here for three thousand years, the poison will fade away by itself."

And also gives a response that leaves even Feng Jiu saying he’s cold:

Donghua suddenly said: "Your father asked me to take care of you before he feathered...but, I have never liked to care for someone who has designs on me."

Ji Heng's face was suddenly pale, and after a long while, she said sadly: "Yes, I understand."

At the edge of the lake, Feng Jiu stared at the surface of it. Dijun wet a handkerchief and gave it to her. Feng Jiu took it and pressed it to her face for a while, and waited for the cold to sink into her skin, and finally woke up entirely to say: "Thank goodness when I was maid at your palace, you didn't have the chance to know me. If you met me then, you would've said to me what you said to Ji Heng today, right?" And said, tentatively, "You were a little cold, when you said that."

Now, I can’t tell you for sure whether or not Donghua meant exactly to make good on it - but the implications are all there. Telling her the poison is no longer a concern and she should just stay in the Valley while he presumably leaves,  and when he talks about her father, doesn’t that sound like a threat? It certainly probably would have, to Ji Heng: “I know you like me, now stop, or I’ll never come back.” That’s what that sounds like. Now, both admins on this blog have anxiety, and, if you look at Ji Heng and how she was literally ready to kill herself at the end of the book, it’s not hard to conjecture that she probably has some mental illness. Piecing that together with what we previously discussed, it’s not hard to infer that she likely has some anxiety surrounding abandonment. 

In her mind, that might very well translate to a straightforward, he’s leaving and never coming back. One might say “why doesn’t she just stop liking him then” but that’s an unreasonable thing to expect...honestly, no one can just turn their emotions off like that, we know this, right? We can’t expect that of a person, so we can’t expect that of a character or that character would no longer be authentically human. Furthermore, if you look at the actions Donghua took in the Valley before he and Feng Jiu ever got together, I think you can see where Ji Heng’s mind might take that even more drastically. The second Feng Jiu showed up in the Valley and this coincided with Donghua’s visit, what does Donghua do? He makes her cook for him, he goes to live with her, he straight up puts up a ward to block them both from the rest of the world. He basically declares to the whole world that, “the only thing I care about here is Feng Jiu.”

Bear in mind, he visits Ji Heng every ten years and is the only thing close to a friend she has in the Valley before Xiao Yan shows up. Ji Heng has been cooking for and living with Donghua every ten year interval he has shown up. To be suddenly and quite completely shut out and removed by this person she thought was her friend, that she had feelings for, even if they were only on her part as far as she knew, is hurtful. It’s like Donghua is saying “I like Feng Jiu, and so I don’t care about you or what you do anymore.” 

Now, that’s not Feng Jiu’s fault, and it’s not Donghua’s fault. He’s free to do that, of course, and people change and they outgrow each other and they leave. But - to a person who’s been left by a lot of people, doesn’t it make sense for Ji Heng to react drastically? Doesn’t it make sense for her to see that Donghua is getting married to Feng Jiu and further extrapolate from his previous actions that he’s unlikely to visit again? Think of it if it happened to you - if your best / only friend, one that you care about a lot and are extremely invested in, left you because they found a new friend, can you truly say that you wouldn’t harbor a single bitter thought for that new friend? Can you say in those circumstances, every time, you would make the right choice? 

IN CONCLUSION, all this, and the previous essay, is not to say that what Ji Heng does throughout the narrative isn’t bad. It is bad, and it is messy, and it does hurt people. These are explanations and not excuses for her behavior. I and Admin Lins will both agree that of the two of us, I am definitely the harder one on Ji Heng. I get my little bursts of rage when I get to certain areas in the novel that, yes, I can’t soothe over even knowing everything that I know. However, I do think - that a part of evaluating reads and the flaws of each character is trying to understand them. I think I have enough faith in Tang Qi that I believe she wouldn’t put a flat antagonist character in a novel to be “evil” for evil’s sake - and therefore, when I go through my read and I see the hints of dimension, I can say, I see it and it’s there. 

In the end, sure, it’s about what everyone wants to believe. You can see that evidence and interpret it however you want. That’s how art and subjectivity and reads work - no one read is completely right.  No one read is completely objective. If someone looked at all of this and thought “nah, bull, Ji Heng did all of it because she’s just an awful person,” I guess there’s nothing to stop them. But in literature,  where every character is a reflection of a living, breathing, relatable person, the admins on this blog are more inclined toward a middle read. That not everyone is completely good and that not everyone is completely bad. That people make bad decisions because of their pasts, because of their circumstances, because of their mental illnesses, but that it does not make them, over all, a bad person forever. 

I think if I can extend my compassion to Donghua and Feng Jiu, who have screwed up all over the place throughout this novel, and say, “I understand why you did this, you’re stupid, but I love you anyway” then I can extend that very same compassion to Ji Heng. And I think, if I can say “It’s ok, give them time, they can do better” about the main characters, then Ji Heng also deserves that very same hope. People are flawed. People make mistakes. People can regret it and get better. 

#mcheang #eternal love of dream #three lives three worlds the pillow book #ji heng #admin ro posts #((sorry if you were hoping to get admin lins)) #((but it's easier for me since I can just translate the text citations directly)) #((the admins usually are of the same opinion with slight variations so i hope I did the topic justice)) #((haha this got very long))

[weeklyfangirl]

Frat Boy Pt. 19

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7 (1), part 7 (2), part 8, part 9, part 10, part 11, part 12, part 13 , part 14, part 15, part 16, part 17, part 18

You’re a gal on a mission in this one. And you’re determined to get answers one way or another ;) Share this with a friend and drag them them along for a roller coaster ride too! xx 

“This is a bad idea,” Renny muttered. We were parked a street away from the frat house, waiting for the boy who’d been ignoring me the past week to appear and get in his car. Granted, I’d only reached out once, but still. He’d never replied. Never reached out. It was the radio silence that scared me more than any gang tags. Ignorance might be bliss, but conscious ignorance was hell.

 After our dinner, I’d woken up to my car in the driveway. The windshield clean. Spotless, even. He must’ve hardly gotten sleep. 

 “Why is this necessary again? Do you think he’s cheating on you?” Renny asked. 

 I shook my head too quickly at the word cheating, because even if he was seeing somebody else it wouldn’t technically be cheating. We’d never even defined this. The only thing I hated more than knowing I was in the dark were gray zones. I shook my head too soon, though. What else could I tell her? I couldn’t exactly tell her the truth - that I think I’m being targeted as a cause of Harry’s random association with a gang and that we need to follow him to confirm my crazy conspiracies so I can affirm that one, I am not crazy, and two, I can reach a decision about whether I should talk to the cops. 

 That was too complicated.

 “Actually, you’re right. I think he’s seeing someone else.” I let the lie slip from my lips.

 “Shit. You think he’s seeing Viv?” 

 I wanted to smile at the edge in her voice. The first evidence she didn’t really like the girl either. “He already told me they slept together,” I said casually, as though I’d mentioned I ate Cheerios for breakfast again.

 Renny almost spat. “Ew!! Seriously? I mean, I guess we kind of already thought that. But still…-” she shivered “-GROSS.” 

 “Yeah. Gross,” I agreed. Something stirred next to the bins, and I clutched her arm. But it wasn’t Harry. The random associate walked on, blissfully unaware of the two girls watching his every move and so completely disappointed by his presence. We both sighed. 

 “Wait, he’s behind him!” Renny screeched. 

 Sure enough, Harry emerged, trailing behind the associate. His hair looked damp. He’d probably showered after practice, then. They did some sort of weird bro handshake and parted ways. 

 A beep of an alarm and Harry slid into his Maserati. Let the chase begin.

 “Still can’t believe he drives that thing to school,” Renny muttered. “I mean I would if I had one, too, but … cheating prick.” 

 I had to hand it to Renny. Even if someone was the most likeable person in the world, if they’d done something to cross her friends, she’d find a way to make them the most detestable. At least in her eyes. 

 We waited as he revved the engine and pulled out. He drove fast, but thankfully Renny’s VW could keep up. Grandpa would’ve been a different story. 

 “Where the hell are we going?” 

 “I don’t know.” I fought the urge to add ‘that’s the problem.’

 We travelled towards the coast before he senselessly veered inland again, ending up somewhere I’d never been before. We trailed him slowly, past locked up storefronts, and tagged alleyways, until he turned into a gritty-looking neighborhood. We slowed around the corner, making sure to keep several streets between us. 

 Around the bend, Harry suddenly slammed on his brakes. Renny lurched forward. 

 “What the fuck-” Renny ducked lower in her seat. “Do you think he saw us?”

 In the split two seconds I had, I wagered our chances of reversing and getting through this unseen. But my split two seconds were up, and I hadn’t moved. 

 The motor ran as he got out of the car, calmly, not bothering to shut the door. He’d known. He’d known all along. Time slowed when he faced us, arms crossed, squinting as his judgement penetrated through his Ray Bans all the way through the windshield. He stalked towards our car. No one was around in the rundown neighborhood street to yell at us to get our cars moving. No one could save me from this eternal embarrassment slowly mounting with each step of his black Chelsea boots. 

 The gig was up. 

 I rolled down my window when he tapped on the glass.

 “Go home,” he ordered. 

 I scoffed. “Really? You haven’t talked to me all week and those are the first words you’re going to say to me?” 

 He stepped backwards, acknowledging nothing. “Go. Home,” pointing the direction whence we came. 

 “We weren’t even following you. We were already in the neighborhood asshole!” Renny yelled. 

 I couldn’t have it end like this. I couldn’t have another week of silence, of questions unanswered. The plan was to follow him and see where he ran off to, not utterly expose my desperation. But now that plan was obliterated. Was this it? Was this seriously how he wanted to end things so… pointlessly?

 I opened the car door, running after his sulking frame. The second I placed a hand on his shoulder blade, he whipped around. I cowered. 

 He hadn’t needed to bare his teeth or shout at me to be intimidating. This oppressive darkness rolled off of him in waves, knocking me down repeatedly just when I saw the shore. Like a tired sailor, I’d return to the ocean, knowing the damage it could cause, but knowing it was worth it. It would be worth it… if I could only see beneath the surface. 

 He flinched as I pulled the shades off, but he didn’t look at me. My hand went along his jaw, against the slight stubble that’d made its way through. He relented.

 His pupils were blasted, almost shadowing the outer ring of green. 

 “I changed because of you,” I breathed. Something flashed in his eyes. Something beneath the darkened surface. “I’m not the same as I was before. And I don’t know even know how to… express it. I don’t even know if that’s a good thing,” I admitted. He opened his mouth, but I raised a hand. “I need to know what you’re not telling me. The old me could’ve gone without it, but who I am now? I can’t.” 

 But it was like he only heard half of what I’d said. “I never asked you to be in my life, Y/N.”

 “No, that’s right. You just swindled me into it by pretending to be dumb. You’re a little too good of an actor.”  

 It was his turn to scoff. “No one’s making you run after me.” 

 “No one’s making you be a complete and utter asshole right now, either. Besides yourself. Can you just-” I pushed his chest- “PLEASE. I’m clearly tired of getting nowhere.” 

 Harry looked at his watch, and his jaw clicked. “You know for someone so concerned with their life, you certainly don’t seem to have much of one.” His eyes bore into mine. 

 I swallowed, hard, unmoving though it stung. “I know Viv’s in on it.” 

 It was a stab in the dark, but it worked. He nearly growled.

 I heard Renny open her door behind me.

 “She’s involved in a lot of parts of my life, Y/N. But at least she doesn’t ask too many questions. And she sure as shit doesn’t overstep,” he growled. 

 “We both know I’m not Viv.” 

 “Yeah,” he chuckled. “You’re right…” His eyes levelled with mine. At least she actually fucks me.” 

 I felt like he should’ve stayed, watch the awful betrayal fill my eyes. But he walked away as the air was ripped from my lungs. I wanted to scream, I wanted to run up to him, push him to the ground and tell him-! 

 ...tell him what? 

 It was true. 

 He paused at the car door, not even trying to face me. “Get yourself home.” 

 I didn’t see him drive away. I just heard the slam of the car door as he left me, halfway up the hill. 

 Renny pulled the car up next to me, and I suddenly felt dirty. Like I needed a shower. A very hot, scalding shower, that would burn every inch of him off my body forever. 

 “What’s the plan?” she asked.  

 Clearly, our plan to trail the subject in very deep question had turned out very deeply miserable. 

 In a close encounter, the sailor realizes fairly quickly that the ocean holds all the power to kill them. But the second they acknowledge that, they don’t abandon what they’re looking for. 

 “Can you drop me off at a friend’s?” I asked.

 They just get a bigger ship. 

 -----------

 The just-built senior apartments were the envy of everyone on campus. Modern architecture and sleek interior made it THE choicest option for the upperclassmen - especially the athletes. It was the next best thing for those not living in fraternities or sororities.

 It was also the most expensive on-campus housing available. You could live there if you were rich enough, but more importantly, if you were lucky enough. There was one other way you could live here, though. Chapman held a raffle to “make our housing opportunity equal for everyone.” Which, was bullshit, considering the apartment only reserved four out of sixty rooms for those “raffle winners.” Four raffle winners, out of four THOUSAND upperclassmen.  

 Felix and Zayn had some pretty insane luck. 

 I knocked on their door, antsy as I thought of their probable reaction: “Why is Y/N standing beyond our door on a Thursday night without Renny?” She was my strongest link to them. I’d begged her to come up with me, but she wasn’t budging. Though she wouldn’t admit it, she was a little annoyed at spending the whole day only to have found no other woman and to have been told off by Harry - who she now deems worse than Lying Panty Tossing Baby. 

 A tall athletic-built woman eyed me as she carried their trash down the hall. 

 Felix opened the door. 

 “Oh, hey.” It was the awkward I remember you but we aren’t friends dance. “S’been a while. Come in.” 

 I noticed he was at least 6’ 2” as I moved past him into the foyer where Zayn and Andre paused the video game. They had a whole tech center set up around the T.V. and dull EDC music came from their speaker system. 

 Andre waved and Zayn’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Hey! What’re you doing here?” He moved a pizza box out of his way to head to the open kitchen. Before I could answer, he returned with a cracked beer, handing it to me. 

 “Thanks,” I said, taking a sip out of politeness. Old Da Vinci maps hung on their walls along with tasteful sketches of nude women, and a framed vintage Star Wars poster was in the hallway. 

 “Where’s Renny?” Felix asked, arms crossed as he sat on the arm of the couch. He’d meant it to be casual, but it wasn’t quite casual enough.

 I didn’t want to be the one to break his heart and tell him about Niall if he didn’t already know. And something told me Renny wasn’t cruel enough to rub it in his face. “Uh, not sure. She had to buzz off somewhere though.” To Niall’s bed. I looked between the three of them. “All of you got so. Lucky. With this place. I almost didn’t believe it when Renny told me.” 

 “Not me!” Andre lifted his beer and dramatically pounded it, slamming it down on the table next to the other four beers.

 “Woah-ugh! Pa! That’s mahogany!” Felix spluttered. 

 “You found it at a garage sale!” 

 “It’s still mahogany!” he squeaked. His gangly arms flailed before adjusting his collar. “Either I’m never donating furniture to this apartment again - or you’re not allowed back in this apartment again. Or both.”

 Andre didn’t answer, just fell flat on the couch. Something was off with him. The energy shifted in the room as the guys eyed Andre. I’d clearly come at a wrong time. 

 “I can swing by later, I know you guys were in the middle of a... game…” 

  Zayn swatted his hand. “No, you’re fine. He’s just…” 

 Andre perked up, awaiting Zayn’s next words. 

 “You want to tell her?” Zayn finished. 

 Andre let out an awkward moan. “You know how date night is coming up?”

 My brows stitched. 

 “No??” He cleared his throat, surprised he had to explain. “So Sig Chi’s date night is coming up and basically we just bring a date, and… party. There’s a theme and everything. You really haven’t heard about this?”

 I shook my head.

 “Huh. It’s kind of a big deal that’s why I’m kind of... huh.”  

 “When is it?” I asked.

 “Tomorrow.” 

 “Tomorrow?!” I paused, thoroughly confused. Had Niall told Renny about this? And if it was Sigma Chi then… Harry must already have a date. For tomorrow. My blood boiled thinking that could be part of the reason why he’d dropped off the face of the Earth this week. So he wouldn’t have to take me as his date. 

 “Mine cancelled on me,” Andre said, running a hand over defined black coils. 

 “Dude, for the hundredth time, it’s not that big of a deal.” 

 “You’re not the one in a frat, Felix!” He laughed humorlessly before landing in a pile on the couch again. In a rare moment, I laughed with him. It was slightly ridiculous how important parties were.

 “Oh-kay,” Felix muttered. His blonde hair flopped on the couch next to Andre. He looked up to me, shrugging. “He’s helpless. Without the distraction of video games. Absolutely helpless.” 

 Zayn gave me a once-over. “You’re in the sorority with Renny, aren’t you?” 

 “Uh, yeah. Kind of. Not officially official yet. Kind of in the process of everything right now. Uh, but” -his eyes narrowed from my rambling- “Yeah. Yeah, I’m in it,” I settled on. 

 Andre came to life again. “Would you go with me?” 

 “Oh! Uh…” 

 “You don’t have to,” Zayn offered. 

 “I can do it. I wasn’t doing anything anyways.” The Netflix I was betraying threw a tantrum in the back of my mind. This weekend I’d been wanting to do nothing but lay low, and preferably, in bed.  

 But if today taught me anything, it’s that my plans clearly never work out too well.

 “Seriously?! It’ll only be a couple hours, I won’t make you stay the whole time. Actually, you can leave whenever you want. Just walk in with me.” 

 “Excuse me?” I asked, half-smiling. 

 “Okay, that sounded bad.” He let out a breathless laugh. “What I meant to say was, thank you. You’ll have a great time.” He threw up the finger guns. 

 Zayn nudged my shoulder with his beer. “Want to go on the balcony?” His eyes bore into mine, and I knew that he knew this wasn’t just a friendly visit. A slight chill ran through me at his perception. It was unnerving how he always seemed to… know. But I guess I shouldn’t judge him for having a keen sixth sense. 

 I let him lead me to the sliding glass door.  

 “Oh, the theme’s James Bond, too! So dress like a Bond girl!” Andre called after us. 

 “Like heels?” I asked. But Zayn slid the door shut behind us. It was dark out, but inside I could see Andre give me a thumbs up before resuming the video game with Felix. 

 “Saved his life. Mate wouldn’t stop gabbin’ ‘bout how gutted he was.” Zayn muttered. The flick of a lighter grabbed my attention. The slight orange illuminated dark features and hollowed cheeks as he took a drag. There was no denying he was handsome, especially in this mood lighting. He probably could’ve been recruited for any fraternity off looks alone, but something told me he wouldn’t step near the place. His vibe was too… anti-organization. He blew the smoke over his shoulder. 

 “Very tortured artist of you,” I noted.

 His head tilted at tortured as if throwing the title back to me. “Artist, maybe. Tortured, no.” 

 “What’s a yes for you, then?” 

 “Yes to whateva you’ve been plannin’ on asking me,” he smirked. “Must’ve been important if you didn’t find me in the studio.” 

 I looked down, then out at the city. Thousands of little people scattered everywhere. Students crawling from late-night classes on the fringes of campus looked like ants. I held my thumb up for scale. Verified ants. Maybe smaller. 

 “I came here to find a different perspective.” My hand fell. I faced him square. “Your perspective.” 

 He took another drag, letting the smoke fill the space between us. “On?” 

 I was a little surprised he didn’t know.

 “Harry.”  

 If he didn’t know, he also didn’t seem too surprised. He leaned against the railing, hazel eyes undressing desperate thoughts. “What do you want to know?” he asked, voice barely above a whisper.

 The ash from his cigarette floated down to his feet, but an unseen wind carried it up again, rolling over and down like dirty snowflakes to the street below. 

 “I know he doesn’t like you.” 

 Zayn’s laugh was light, soft, but carried the same fullness as Renny’s. “Perceptive girl, ya? S’not what you want to know though is it.” 

 “Why is he so scared of you?” His brow arched, and I could tell I was losing him. “What do you know?” I clarified. 

 Another drag and his shoulders straightened. “Thought you were flatterin’ me there for a second.” Something glimmered in his eyes, something just beyond the surface, and I looked away before I could see anything more than friendly. “Can I ask you somethin’ in return?” 

 I nodded. 

 “Why do you want to know?” he murmured. 

 “I just want to understand.”

 “Mm,” he hummed, the treble of his voice like slow-spilling silk. “Curiosity killed the cat.” 

 I swallowed a little too loudly, but his words hit a little too closely. 

 “S’all right,” he continued. “S’human nature t’want to understand.” He cocked his head a little. “I actually met Harry before school started during the summer. I was working at Hilltop Resort.”

 “Really?” 

 “I was his server.” He let out a short breath as if he couldn’t believe it happened. “Tipped well, actually.” 

 “I remember you working there!” Faint summer memories of Renny whisking us away for lunch on our treat yourself day came back, stirring faint feelings of happiness. It seemed so long ago. I felt like I’d aged five years in three months. “So let me get this straight. He doesn’t like you because you’re in the service industry?” I spat.

 He winced. “No, s’more like…” He took a breath. “There was a coworker of mine. He wasn’t mean, but he wasn’t exactly nice either. Kept to himself on breaks, never really chatted with any of us except to flirt with the bartender. Anyway, I used to see Harry a lot there, but when Jack got promoted Harry’d only sit in Jack’s section.”

 I crossed my arms, the night time air finally sinking in. 

 “I didn’t think too much of it at first,” he admitted. The cigarette moved in his mouth, hand fiddling with the lighter. “But one night I was running out to give a guest the card they’d left behind, but I saw them together instead.” 

 Before I could picture Harry and Zayn’s coworker making out against the wall, he continued - “He was giving Harry stacks of cash.”

 Flashbacks of Viv trying to pass Harry money in the Catalina Island bar played out like a movie in my mind. 

 “What’d you do?” I pressed.

 He shrugged. “I saw Harry slip something else in his pocket. It looked like a little bag. Must’ve been a bonus.” He muttered the last words. 

 “A bonus for what?” 

 “I didn’t know then. I just thought he’d somehow found a way to steal from the manager’s safe and was splitting the profits.”

 “Why give it to Harry though?” 

 “That’s what I couldn’t figure out.” He leaned in. “I saw them together a few more times. The second was an accident. Third, not so much. Harry saw me that time. Then before I left for the night, I searched his locker. Took me a while, but I found some pills. Little bag of coke, too. He came in right when I was putting it back.” 

 “No.” 

 “Yeah. He didn’t say anything. Just stared at me like he was going to kill me. I got my shit and got the hell out of there. Next day, the boss said they received a tip to check my locker and they found the drugs in mine. You know the fucked up bit? I was fired.” 

 “But it wasn’t yours!” 

 “Doesn’t matter. Still found it there.” Zayn stamped out his cigarette, blowing away the last smoke. I guess pity was etched in my face, because he suddenly turned defensive. “Don’t look at me like that. I work at Javier’s now. I’m fine.” 

 Javier’s was the fancy Mexican restaurant overlooking the Pacific. He was doing more than fine.

 “That’s still not fair to you,” I muttered.

 “I didn’t want to be involved, anyway. S’better I left one way or another.” 

 “What was his name again? Your coworker’s?”

 “Jack.” 

 Jack. Why did that sound so familiar? 

 “He’s not sound, you know,” Zayn added. 

 “Well clearly if he gave you murder eyes.” 

 “No, not Jack. Harry. He’s not…”

 “Sound,” I repeated. The word felt heavy on my tongue.

 Zayn nodded, tucking a cigarette behind his ear.

 “I can’t believe Harry got you fired.” 

 “Well, I don’t exactly know. Jack must’ve been the one to move the drugs into my locker.”

 “Yeah, but who told him to?”

 Zayn didn’t answer. The facts had been there this entire time, but I didn’t want to see it. I still didn’t want to see it. But Zayn was here, undeniably linking them together for me. Harry and drugs and money were three things that’d been circulating in the same place much longer than I could know. For some reason beyond me, Harry was a dealer. Or ran as head of them. Which meant his association with the men who’d assaulted me was… what? A business deal gone wrong?

 “England’s a small country, you see the same faces everywhere. Like here, if you’re perceptive enough. And in each, he’s jus’... involved in something bigger, while at the same time trying to hide. S’like he’s a magnet for infamy to his own detriment.” 

 “Are you referring to his adoption?” 

 He twisted the cigarette behind his ear, realizing I didn’t really need an answer to this question and that now I was just testing him for what he knew. “Contrary to what he may believe, I don’t know everything.” 

 But I couldn’t fight the feeling that he was talking about me. Smooth artist’s fingers fiddled with the lighter again, but he didn’t light the second cigarette. He knew more than what he was telling me. 

 But even the new me didn’t want to hear much else tonight.  

 “You don’t want to stay?” he asked.

 I didn’t realize I was walking towards the door ‘til his words stopped me in my tracks. Disappointment tinged his words. I felt a little guilty, heading out the door as soon as I’d gotten what I’d needed. 

 But I was tired. And sadly, unless there was a sketch pad in front of him, I didn’t know what else we could talk about. I didn’t know what else he’d see. 

 I shook my head, and he lit the cigarette, not bothering to walk me out. 

 ------

Racing down the spindly halls, my heart pounded out of my chest. I heard the cries above the whispers of the Watchers, and they grew louder with a sickening urgency. A gutteral wailing meant for me. 

 I looked down the hall, awaiting the dark shadow to appear from the walls, when he’d creep closer, suffocatingly closer. 

 The door wouldn’t open, not past an inch. 

 But he called for me, this time. My name fell from unseen lips.

 “Y/N,” he called. It was hoarse. He was scared. I’d never heard that cry before. This time it wasn’t solid air the door was against - it was pills. Tiny pills, hundreds of them, thousands of them, multiplying on top of each other until they filled what I could see of the room. Until they were spilling out the crack. 

 “Y/N!!!” His voice was panicked, but muffled. It was muffled now. Why wasn’t he opening the door?? Why couldn’t he reach me?? The shadow drew closer. It surrounded me, outside, every inch of the hall covered by darkness. 

 My heartbeat was the only sound. 

 A waterfall of pills. The glint of a knife. 

 I couldn’t reach him in time. 

 I couldn’t save Harry. 

 I couldn’t even save myself.

part 20

#fratboy! harry #harry one shot #harry styles imagine #harry blurb #harry imagine #harry styles fan fiction #harry preference #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles #harry styles one shot #fratboy!harry #harry styles blurb #harry styles preference #one direction #zayn malik #zayn fanfiction #zayn one shot #zayn fic #zayn #niall horan #niall #harry #one direction fan fiction #1d #one direction imagines #one direction imagine #one direction blurbs #one direction blurb #zayn imagine

[moghedien]

Ok so I have a lot of thoughts on the Witcher and this may not be coherent or concise at all but I’m gonna TRY

So overall my review for it is “VERY GOOD.” If you want to read the books first and are wondering how far you should read before watching this, definitely read the two short story collections (Last Wish then Sword of Destiny). You don’t have to start the saga itself. This season covers the short stories and some things that happen between them and Blood of Elves, but doesn’t actually get into Blood of Elves itself. That’s just if you want to read the books first of course, I don’t feel like you necessarily have to. It might help make certain aspects clearer earlier on and also give you some appreciation for certain things, but its not necessary. 

I’m gonna get into spoilery things about the show and also some things/people that are likely to happen/show up in the next season. If you don’t want to know any of that I’d say stop reading now. If you don’t care, then here goes. 

So the first thing I want to talk about is probably the more...I don’t want to say controversial aspect but the thing that people don’t seem to like and criticize it for, and that’s the timelines. So the show jumps between the point of views of Geralt, Yennefer, and Ciri throughout each episode (actually Yen isn’t in the first episode but is in all of them afterward). Each of them have their own storylines and each of those storylines are happening at different times. For instance, in the first episode Geralt’s storyline takes place decades before what’s going on in Ciri’s. The main problem I see its not made immediately clear. There’s do “ X Years Later...” or “Then...” popping up as they cut back and forth between the stories. I didn’t realize that was the case until halfway through the first episode when I heard a comment Renfri made about Calanthe that set the time up as compared to where Ciri’s is at. The problem most people have with that is the lack of clarity and the confusion at not immediately knowing what’s going on. I don’t really think that’s a problem though. 

I wouldn’t have necessarily been bothered if they had used title cards to clearly set the timeline up, but I think how its done is the better choice. I think using title cards might have suggested that Geralt and Yennefer’s stories are just backstory/exposition to a main Ciri storyline. Having them all have equal footing feels very intentional and I feel like is better for the storylines and the characters. Also, I don’t think its bad to assume that your audience is smart enough to figure things out, and its ok as an audience to be somewhat confused and not immediately understand everything that’s going on. As long as things become clearer over time, I think that’s perfectly reasonable story telling, and probably better than just spoonfeeding information to the audience. The show gave enough details to show you the timelines were not linear throughout each episode. As I said, I figured it out in the first episode with the comment about Calanthe. Other episodes make it clear too by showing characters that have already died or places that have already been destroyed. Or showing characters as children in Yennefer’s storyline who in the same episode are adults in Geralt’s. The viewer will figure it out eventually, even if they miss the first few details that show this. It’s not bad or wrong to ask the audience to actually watch the show and pay attention to what’s going on. Having them think about what things mean and what’s going on is a good thing. 

Also, I think the non-linear story telling really did a good job of making sure the audience spent time with all of the main characters throughout the show. We knew who Ciri was before she was even born. Had it been linear, we would have gotten little of Ciri until the end, and I really liked being able to build her up as a character and have her experience things throughout so that when the ball gets rolling next season, we already understand her and spent time with her. It makes it clear that this is as much her story as Yen or Geralt’s. They’re all given equal footing throughout and built up as characters throughout, that balance couldn’t have been accomplished with a linear storyline just because of the fact that Geralt and Yen have lived so much longer than her. 

I feel like I should talk about the characters more but I’m honestly not sure what to say except THEY GOOD. 

I will say that I was nervous about a few things with Yennefer. I was afraid that her deformities being corrected would be framed as her glow up and that would be when she really becomes the Yennefer of Vengerberg we all stan. I’m very pleased to say that wasn’t the case. We actually spent a lot more time with Yennefer pre-magicial spine surgery than I expected and while you do see her slowly becoming more and more the character we know over time, she really begins to become peek Yen before the transformation. She has somewhat of a shell to come out of, but she’s pretty clearly Yennefer the entire time and I think that’s fantastic. I really loved that her backstory wasn’t just “look at this sad girl. don’t worry she’ll be hot one day and then you’ll all see.” It could have so easily been that and it wasn’t at all. 

In general, I think Yennefer is really well done. I loved Anya playing her and I really like that she was so unapologetically Yennefer. She rubs people the wrong way and she does not care. No excuses are made for her, but also she isn’t villianized for it. You understand why she’s doing things. You understand why she’s like this. You either accept it or you get out of her way. 

Her motives of wanting to have a baby is a cliche and for good reason. Even knowing it was part of Yennefer’s character beforehand, I was still like “yeah ok.” But I really did think the show did a good job with it. Her wanting to have a baby wasn’t some off handed thing that came from no where and had no reason to affect the character as much as they wanted us to believe it did (*coughcough* Black Widow). It’s not just about the baby with Yen. It’s made clear that she just wants control over herself. She doesn’t necessarily want the baby, she wants the ability to decide to have a baby. She sacrificed the ability to decide in order to do something she thought would give her more control and power, but it didn’t. So she removes herself from there and from the influence of the Brotherhood, and tries to find real power that she has complete control of. But she tries to take back the one thing they still have that’s hers, which is the potential baby. 

But then, it is also about the baby to Yennefer. Or not the baby, but the person that it would be. Someone who would rely on her, and who would need her, and for whom she would be important. Lovers come and go thus far in Yennefer’s life. They’ve proven to be not as reliable as she’d hoped. But, of course if she did have a child, she would be the most important person in that child’s life for a significant amount of time, if not for their entire life. Her dream wasn’t to be a mother; it was to be important to someone. Being a mother would just make it all the more certain for her that she would be important to at least one person. So yes, its a cliche motive for a female character and for good reason, but they at least made it make a whole lot of sense for Yennefer. And it’s gonna really add weight to when she does meet Ciri and really becomes Ciri’s mother.

Speaking of, I am in awe of how the show ended, which made it explicitly clear that Ciri and Geralt’s relationship wasn’t the only one being guided by destiny. Yennefer’s relationship with Geralt and Ciri is equally destined. Geralt and Ciri have one exchange with each other. The first and only thing Geralt says to Ciri is “People linked by destiny will always find each other,” and the first and only thing Ciri says to him is “Who is Yennefer?” Then is cuts to his face, realizing that there is no reason she should know that name. No reason that she should bring up that name except that Yennefer is also destined to be part of this relationship. Then it cuts to black. They didn’t even introduce themselves. They didn’t even say their own names to each other. The only name mentioned in this exchange is Yennefer’s, who is not even there and who has no reason to be brought up now, of all times. Only, there is reason for her to be brought up now. Because Yennefer is Ciri’s mother. They are linked by destiny as well, just as she is linked with Geralt and Geralt with Ciri. They are both Ciri’s parents. End of discussion. Destiny has decreed it as such. I loved this ending, so damned much. 

Geralt, I feel like could have been so easy to get wrong. He could very easily be made into the broody man archtype. Geralt as a character has always been that to an extent, but I think it more plays with that idea. He quite literally plays with the world’s assumption that he is a hard, emotionless man that just cares about himself, but it’s obvious that isn’t actually the case. His moral code is defined pretty early on, and you see that he cares deeply about people and the show gets that right. And as much as I don’t like Henry Cavill as a person, I do think he plays Geralt well. 

The other characters, I am pretty satisfied with. Jaskier/Dandelion was cast so well. I wasn’t expecting quite as much of Tissaia as we got but I liked all that was given. I really was NOT expecting Vilgefortz to show up, much less be Yennefer and Triss’s new father (thank you so much Triss Merigold for that comment). Triss I adored and I really loved the actor playing her. Respect her or fight me. Fringilla, honestly what the fuck she was terrifying but we can’t help but stan. Honestly, I’m glad we got Triss, Fringilla, and Sabrina all making clear appearances and having roles established for them, because it really gives me hopes for the Lodge of Sorceresses in future seasons. I will cease to be corporeal if/when we get the first meeting of the Lodge in (most likely) two or three seasons. 

Speaking of the Lodge, everyone who has paid attention to my blog at all knows I’m so sad that Philippa Eilhart isn’t in this season but I gotta admit that was probably a good call. The only places she really would have shown up was in the scenes in Aretuza with the Brotherhood and at Sodden Hill, and she really had no reason to be either place. First of all, we would have been introduced to her character there and for what? A few shots of her yelling at people in the meeting or fighting in the battle? Adding her character there would have taken away from the established characters we already had there, and frankly probably would have been a waste of her character introduction. 

As it is now, there much potential for her when she does show up. She can, first of all, make the proper entrance that she deserves. Second of all, it adds some tension between her and Yennefer and the others. She wasn’t at Sodden and they were. Imagine the bickering that will occur when she comes in and puts herself in charge of situations. Imagine it. Revel in it. I could eat this hypothetical tension up with a spoon.

And of course I can write two paragraphs about a character who is NOT in the show, because I am first and foremost a Philippa Eilhart stan account and secondly gay, which is basically the same as that first thing I said. 

As an adaption, I think it did pretty dang good. There are certain things I’m kind of sad got changed. Like I’m so sad that Geralt’s introduction to Yennefer wasn’t her hungover as shit in a trashed hotel room, naked in bed at noon, and demanding he bring her some apple juice. But at least there was apple juice! The short stories themselves would be tricky to adapt outright, and frankly not all of them are really important, but some of them are very important. Adapting it like this was a good move. Because this season (and I hate to phrase it like this because it really makes it sound unimportant or like its just exposition) is basically a set up season for the next, which appears to be when they’ll start adapting the saga itself. We get the important stories of Geralt and Yen that take place before the saga and we get more of an introduction to Ciri than we really get in the books. Having this season be basically the short stories plus the events that took place immediately before Blood of Elves was a good call I think. 

Overall, I loved this show. Like, a lot. Like, I watched the whole thing in a day, and I think I’m going to go watch it again after I post this. I think it’s really faithful and true source material that people love while not isolating the people who are being introduced to the Witcher saga with this. It doesn’t really hold hands or make efforts to seem overly familiar to the audience (its not trying to be game of thrones and people can just shut up with that comparison), but it’s not gonna be work to watch and enjoy it. I really did love it, and I am so relieved that they already have the second season confirmed because knowing what comes next, I know the second season should be even better.  

#witcher #witcher netflix #the witcher #yennefer of vengerberg #Geralt of rivia #ciri #cirilla fiona elen riannon

[queenitn]

So...I just found something that I'd written one night at like 4am a month into lockdown.

It's pretty much a very unnecessarily angry rant.

I can probably contradict half the stuff I say in it myself. It's just...kinda rude in places and when I'm thinking straight there's some parts I don't really agree with myself. It's not aimed at anybody and I'm definitely a hypocrite but I'm gonna post it anyways so go wild I guess.

So I recently took a stroll through Stucky fanfiction on ao3. For a while there I'd been avoiding it, and I'd nearly convinced myself that my mind was exaggerating the whole bottom!Bucky/top!Steve thing but yeah, I'm not.

Normally, I'd say who tops or bottoms doesn't matter. It's pretty irrelevant. But... since the majority of the fanfictions clearly prefer to write bottom!Bucky, obviously, there is some significance. Wouldn't the proportion be more equal if it truly was irrelevant?

Besides being annoying as fuck, it's also pretty interesting I guess. I have nothing else to do so I'm going to be ranting about a lot of stuff.

So, I mostly try to look for bottom!Steve, right? Because that's what I like. I read a bottom!Steve fic, then I say, "Hmm, this author seems to like bottom!Steve, maybe they've written more?" I go check, and I find...mostly bottom!Bucky, with maybe one or two more bottom!Steve.

It's fine the first few times, but after a while it's honestly weird. Clearly, a lot of very good authors have no problem writing bottom!Steve. They just happen to write more bottom!Bucky. As far as I can tell, that's pretty much the common trend. But why? What exactly does one think while starting a new fic, going all, "Hmm...I think...this time.... we're gonna have bottom!Bucky again." Again and again and again until it's most times.

Why is bottom!Steve so fetishized? I don't mean the fics that actually have a dom/sub element. I mean just pure bottom!Steve itself. Why does it have to be some sort of rarity?

As far as I know, there's...really nothing in canon indicating who would likely top or bottom. (I mean yeah, I do believe that canon Bucky is more likely to want to dom than canon Steve, but that's different.)

So, what is it?

Sure, Steve is taller, has a deeper voice, more muscle, a beard....but those are just physical things. They don't actually have anything to do with taking or giving.

Besides, he used to be small before. Is that what this is about? Previously tiny man likes to be in control? Likes to...what? Prove he's a manlier man? Bullshit. Besides the fact that it's bullshit, it also doesn't seem to fit with canon Steve.

The "Sometimes I think you like getting punched" and the "And you've got nothing to prove" make me think that his proving himself had less to do with showing his dominance and more to do with showing his endurance. I'd say bottoming is exactly what he'd want to do.

Besides, wasn't that exactly what made his relationship with Bucky special? The fact that he didn't have to "prove himself" in any way? Bucky already knew his worth.

Is it because Steve likes to give orders? Some sort of "Oh, this guy was always meant to be the leader"? Well, there's a huge difference between being a leader, giving orders in a battlefield...and giving orders in the bedroom. And I'm pretty sure top/bottom preferences would be completely unrelated to who's the boss at work.

But nevermind that, as far as I can tell, sure Steve gives orders, but he also looks to the people he trusts for guidance. The best example is Nat. The thing that makes their friendship so goddamm precious is partly in the way he always glances at her for confirmation before making a decision. Isn't Bucky sort of like an Ultimate Nat with sex benefits?

Nevermind that too. Steve bossing people around is great, but that's not the point, is it? The point is does he enjoy it? I think, the only movie where he did look like he relished his power was TFA. I'm pretty confident that's because of the novelty of his new strength partially, and partially also because of the rush caused by his back to back successes. Why? Because he never seems to take that kind of enjoyment again. As opposed to...maybe Sam? The guy who gets his literal wings back after (presumably) years and lets out a whoop after being chased by the missile thingies. Sam's joy doesn't wear off. Steve's does.

Is it just me, or has this skew towards bottom!Bucky actually increased over the years? Why? I can say a few things on this.

First, maybe people need to remember a bit more that Sebastian Stan is not Bucky Barnes. Chris Evans is not Steve Rogers. And Steve Rogers is not Captain America.

No matter what you think about the actors, the characters they play are separate. Please.

Second, there is a very interesting theory that exists which says that the reason why Bucky is so popular in the fandom is because his character arc is relatable to women and the queer community in the fact that it's about him regaining his stolen agency. Which is true.

Does this have anything to do with him bottoming though? I mean, I don't know. Fanfictions are important because they allow us to explore ourselves, whether it's our sexuality or our trauma that we're trying to figure out. In that way, it makes sense that maybe we will tend to write Bucky as a bottom more often. Except no.

Partly because, having had bad experiences at a young age myself, and being queer myself, I do not relate to Bucky. And hypothetically speaking, I would totally bottom for Peggy or Bucky, but I would rail the absolute shit out of Steve. I canNOT be the only one.

Partly also because yeah, a lot of fanfiction is projection, which is good for the soul, both yours and mine, but not to the point where we create a fanon version of the character completely different from the canon one. Yeah, you could say that canon doesn't really give us much of a character, but clearly they give us something and we have to build up on that right? It's true for both Bucky and Steve. Bucky barely has lines, but his actions speak enough. There's an absolutely breathtaking character waiting for you in canon if you really want to look. As for Steve, let me just say, sass and the tiniest little hints of PTSD do not make a whole character. Marvel fucked it up, but this goes for the fandom too (this is keeping in mind that Steve technically has three movies dedicated to him and Bucky doesn't)

Stop treating Steve like your personal punching bag, Stucky fandom.

It does happen, if we project our bad experiences on Bucky, Steve often naturally fills the role of the clueless/mildly asshole-ish love interest. Not too much of an asshole though, clearly you love him.

That's fine. Fanfiction is about self expression, but should we lose sight of the canon characters that we loved so much in the first place? And isn't fanfiction just as much about exploring those characters, as objectively as we possibly can?

Another thing related to that...why do we only have to identify with one character? I don't know how to put this, but there's a thing called halo effect and I think that's kind of what happens (I'm not a psychologist).

You see something in Bucky. And then you start to attribute more and more things to him that may or may not actually exist. Like yeah, he's fullfilling the traditional love interest role in Steve's movies, but that doesn't automatically mean he's a bottom. The two things are... actually entirely unrelated. They're only related in your mind. And similar to that, when we see one thing in a character that we identify with, we kind of want to see even more things in them we identify with, but it doesn't have to be like that. That's not how any person works, and it's not how any fully developed character works. You can relate to both the characters in different ways, no need to dump it all in one.

Ok, another thing, that I don't like to think about but it's occured to me and I don't like it. So, Steve is generally coded as a bisexual, right? And Bucky is coded as gay. Look yourself in the eye in the mirror and think about whether you're unconsciously assuming that the bi guy isn't going to want to bottom. I'm a bisexual woman, I will top Steve. I kind of resent this.

Going off on another tangent, I have also delved into Stony on my quest for bottom!Steve. Pretty sure there's even less of that there. Why??? That's crazy.

Normally, I'm pretty sure Tony would be coded as the top. He's much older, richer. He clearly has control issues. That's one of his defining features. Control. (I don't mean that in a bad way.) So....what exactly do Bucky and Tony have in common besides dark hair and short hight? The only thing I could come up with was thotiness. They're both shown as Thots. Is that it? The Thot Bottoms? Ok.

Is it the whole energy thing? "Bucky has bottom energy"? Does he? Can you argue with me if I say that TFA Steve has bratty bottom energy? That TFA Bucky goes from service top energy to mean top energy? Pretty sure that's subjective. But what exactly are we seeing differently here? I'm honestly asking.

Bucky's character is ridiculously strong, stronger than Steve in some ways (besides probably physically). Specifically, it's because of his ability to not only survive, but heal. Can we acknowledge how crazy that is? He's just fucking buying plums, but that's still more than we've ever seen Steve do. You can say his trauma is greater, but it looks like his coping ability is greater too. So is that what this is? Steve doesn't cope. Instead he focuses on external things like being Cap, Hydra, Bucky. I wouldn't call that a healthy way of living...but it's romantic, right? Neglecting to take care of yourself? No, actually avoiding taking care of yourself by focusing entirely on another person? Is that it? We're romanticizing unhealthy behaviour?

Is it because you feel more for Bucky, wearing his hurt on his sleave, versus Steve who wears it hidden under his skin?

Am I allowed to believe that Steve's ultimate shield isn't the vibranium one, but Captain America himself?

That's just me getting off track and mildly pissy but the point stands. We like seeing Steve in control. He wears it well. He's good at it. But that's just not that relevant. You don't just boss poeple around in the bedroom because you're good at it, you have to want it too. Would he want it? Is a commanding voice really an indicator of a person's desire to command? Can we really say because he's usually the one giving orders (because that's his actual job), that he likes it too? Does he look like he especially likes it? No.

I've been around fandoms long enough to know that all fandoms always have a preference regarding who ultimately tops or bottoms. This isn't the first time it's bugged me, but it feels more this time because I just don't see it. And it makes me angry because it contradicts what I feel, are the best parts of the characters. No, Bucky bottoming isn't the contradiction..but all this that I wrote, the connotations of this kind of coding, the underlying thoughts.... some of it is just not nice, but some of it opposes the little things that humanize these characters. It wouldn't matter, except that it wouldn't have happened at all if it didn't matter.

It's not just what happens to them in canon that matters so much. It's also what they choose to do for themselves when they have the chance. It feels like they made their choices and half the fandom ignored it. "Nah man, you'll look better at the bottom. Look at that hair."

Because ultimately, that's what it feels like to me. A mixture of not thinking too much about it (though I know this post probably counts as overthinking), some wierd internalised heteronormativity, and I don't know what just kind of fucks with all of us. All I know is that I hate it. I hate it.

It's not the bottom!Bucky I hate, it's the underlying, unthinking assumptions. The way it's a foregone conclusion. It's not. I really just want to be able to read the goddamn fanfictions again without wanting to tear my skin off.

( You can help by giving reccs)

#steve rogers #captain america #bucky barnes #stucky

[jyndor]

so I was talking to my friend @timelordthirteen about some shit and I decided to just share with you all about the importance of actually explaining shit instead of just saying it. the Left, I am looking at you bitch (ily bitch but)

lol would put a read more but tumblr's being a petty little bitch today ❤

shitposting is fun. dunking on asshat right wingers is fun. you know what is not fun? seeing people not understand the basic terminology that we use in the ~discourse*

but. if we are going to use terminology, if we are going to inject regular old laypeople conversations with (imo) unneccessary amounts of academic terms, then we should try to use them correctly** because in many cases misusing them means we as leftists do not have a full understanding of what the fuck we're on about. this dilutes both the meanings of these terms and their purposes. I know I am wordy as fuck and can be hard to understand sometimes (thanks adhd) so what I am about to say is a little ironic, but clarity is fucking important when it comes to strategy and organizing.

so I am going to examine some commonly misused concepts and terms today. yay.

1. THEORY, PRAXIS AND FRAMEWORKS FOR ANALYSIS weeee yes I am fun at parties tyvm

what is a framework? a structure, in this case, for analyzing some bullshit we deal with irl. that's it lol but I use it a lot so I figured I'd define it here. examples of frameworks are: intersectionality, marxism, queer theory. seriously, if you can think it, it has already been analyzed through the queer lens.

what is theory? ideas, knowledge in the abstract based on looking at shit happen and analyzing that shit. it is useful because it can help us articulate what we are going through in our shitty lives. this is why I often recommend people learn about chomsky's manufacturing consent (theory of why we get the info we get from the media tl;dr), not because I think chomsky is the ultimate leftist grandpa but because this site needs some media literacy lmao. and btw, this clip narrated by amy goodman is a great, trippy little 4:30 min long video that explains the basics of manufacturing consent so you don't have to open a book or use drugs!

theory can help serve as a framework to understand what the fuck is happening to us irl, but imo is kind of an incomplete understanding of shit without lived experience (aka - theory v praxis). this is one reason why we should listen to marginalized groups on their own shit and not talk over them - because all of the research and theory in the world does not make me a Black woman living in Flint (aka - ground up organizing v technocracy). it is not about being nice, or politically correct, although we should be nice and we should care about people just because they're people. if you understand the why of listening to marginalized groups, you understand that it is mainly about communities knowing their own problems best and therefore having the best solutions for those problems.

2. MARXISM, CAPITALISM AND OTHER BUZZWORDS (and leftists need hobbies)

so marxism is a framework for socioeconomic analysis observed by mr kpop himself, karl marx (and his sugar daddy friedrich engels). because leftists love to argue, there are so many kinds of marxism, and if you ever feel like you are shouting into the void too much, just look up some arguments between stalinists and trotskyists. it's just... magical. no, I am not defining tankie here.

as many people smarter than I am have said (read: kwame ture seriously watch this video it's iconic), karl marx did not discover socialism or invent it or whatever, he observed capitalism and saw how shitty it is, like any other sane person would do. the point of marxism is not karl marx (which he would say) or tankies or fuckin guillotines***

things that marxism is:

- an analytical tool for looking at the world

- a theory which was used to develop the basis of different kinds of post-capitalist economic systems like communism and socialism

things that marxism is not:

- a system of economics or government lmao marx did not govern dick

- scary

marx looked at capitalism and said "this is definitely gonna fail someday because it's clearly unsustainable, I mean the proletariat is bigger than the bourgeoisie who owns everything uh yeah so I can do basic fucking math. if I have one capitalist and fifteen hundred workers, eventually that capitalist is gonna lose his damn head because he is gonna hoard all that wealth and his workers are gonna get pissed that they don't have their basic fucking needs met. lmao now put on some kpop, freddy" or something. idk that might not be a direct quote.

what is capitalism? (besides horseshit) a system of economics where industry is privately owned. and yes, this includes publically traded corporations because they are still owned by individuals (shareholders) even if they aren't privately owned by one person or a group of partners. truly a nightmare to live in, and we hate to see it.

what is the proletariat? well, the working class. and the bourgeoisie is the owner class, the capitalist class. the rich.

and this is something else that we need to discuss, tumblr. if you are going to say "eat the rich" please understand who you are talking about. we're not talking about random actors or musicians, or doctors or lawyers, even if they make better than a liveable wage. even if they often have zero class consciousness, meaning they don't ~see class, like colorblind racism for classism.

anyone who has to sell their labor for wages and is not part of the owner class is working class. this includes people who cannot work for any multitude of reasons (disability, can't find work, caretaker, etc) and also white collar workers who might be well off in relatively high paying jobs because they don't own the means of production, or capital that is used to produce shit. so yes, that rich actor who is a part of a union is actually part of the working class in marxist theory. when we say eat the rich, we mean jeff bezos, not john boyega. jeff bezos owns the means of production. john boyega is a working actor who is in a union.

this is important not because we shouldn't get pissed off when actors and celebrities do tone deaf shit like singing about imagining no possessions in their mansions while people starve during a pandemic. they need to put their money to good use, have some class consciousness, instead of asking fans to donate to causes that they could fund. but they are not the bourgeoisie until they start owning the means of production. and there is no doubt that many of them do, which is why we might eat gwyneth paltrow but we won't eat john boyega.

and by the way, eating the rich is metaphorical, a reference to french revolution-era philosopher jean-jacques rousseau's quote: "when the people shall have nothing more to eat, they will eat the rich." obviously I don't even need to explain it but I will anyway. basically, the people will forcibly redistribute the wealth of the rich if they have nothing else. this is why there are some very smart capitalists who are in favor of reforms and raising taxes, because they recognize the danger to their necks in not providing for basic needs of the working class. no, "eat the rich" does not mean be pro-cannibalism. but there are many capitalists who would prefer to die than lose their hoard so

oh, and one last thing. "no ethical consumption in capitalism" is tossed around a lot and it's a million percent true, but I need all of us to understand that it is not an excuse to support harmful practices but it is also not meant to shame consumers. it is rather an understanding that we as consumers are not responsible for the monstrous impact of capitalism. we live in it, we have no choice but to consume, and sometimes (most of the time) that means we have to buy shit that was produced in unethical ways. unfortunately supply chains being what they are, all consumption causes harm in some way.

it is a reminder that individual actions are not going to have the impact of collection actions. this is why plastic bag bans, though well-meaning, are not going to have the same impact on climate catastrophe as, say, banning fossil fuels would.

I am a vegetarian and I can recognize that I am doing a whole lot of nothing by not supporting factory farms, and when I was a vegan I wasn't doing much either. boycotts without mass support don't have much evidence of working. this is why bds exists - boycott divestment and sanctions. boycott, meaning don't support goods from various conpanies connected to something, divestment, meaning get companies/countries/institutions to remove their money from something, and sanctions, meaning getting countries to penalize a country for their bad behavior until they comply.

this is what the anti-apartheid south africa movement did and what palestinian rights organizers support for israeli apartheid.

do not allow legislators to put the burden of fixing the ills of society that capitalism created on consumers' shoulders.

3. INTERSECTIONALITY (because it deserves its own section)

I don't have as much to say on this as I did the last bit because holy shit capitalism, man.

intersectionality, a term that was coined by law professor kimberlé crenshaw in the late 80s to serve as a framework for people to critically assess how legal structures impact Black women differently due to class, race and gender. it is not incompatible with marxism (in fact marxism has been argued to be a form of intersectionality).

intersectionality can and should be used to examine why the Black queer experience is unique, for example. I also want to acknowledge that professor crenshaw isn't the only person to come up with intersectionality; sojourner truth spoke about it even if she didn't coin the term, for example. patricia hill collins, another influential af Black feminist academic****, created frameworks for viewing intersectionality. also you can read her book black feminist thought here for free.

intersectionality has been used - improperly - by liberal feminists***** to excuse bad behavior from leaders who pretend to care about women while creating and enforcing legislation that harms women. anyone who stans politicians at all needs help. it has also been misrepresented as essentialism, which it is also not (essentialism is the idea that everything has some assets that are necessary to its identity) because intersectionality isn't saying that every Black queer woman has the same experience, just that Black queer women might experience similar issues because of a system that negatively views them as Black and queer and women.

intersectionality does not excuse kamala harris for prosecuting poor moms of truant kids.

okay if you guys have things to add please do because I want us to educate each other instead of always talking shit. both is good.

* I am not calling out people for not being academic enough or not speaking english or not reading enough theory because LOL I am a 2x neurodivergent college dropout who radicalized by working retail and not by hearing karl marx talk dirty to me. also, not everyone speaks english like, I am truly not shitting on people.

** I recognize that language is fluid and ever changing, and that is a good thing. But diluting terms that serve specific purposes is not ever going to be good.

*** and I don't want to dismiss intra-leftist theory discourse (🤢) because I know how annoying it is to hear bernie sanders lumped in with liz warren, or bernie sanders lumping himself in with post-capitalists lmao of course I get it. but twitter discourse is not dismantling capitalism so ANYWAY

**** actually crenshaw built on collins' work (black feminist thought) and the collins built on crenshaw' work we love to see it.

***** I should go ahead and define liberal feminism as well as rad fem and terf and shit because people use them all very very loosely, especially terf (not every transphobe is a terf but every terf is a transphobe, it's like the rectangle/square thing). but I am exhausted with this so next time.

#marxism #word vom #intersectionality #kpop idol karl #truly apologize for my mess

[aion-rsa]

Star Trek Discovery Season 4: What to Expect

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Yes, we’re already looking forward to Star Trek: Discovery Season 4. Season 3 saw the show go where no Star Trek has gone before – literally. Flung almost a thousand years into the future after saving all sentient life as we know it, Michael Burnham and her crewmates had to navigate a new and alien reality that bore little resemblance to the one they left behind.

Yet, the decision to send Discovery to the future is possibly the best decision the series has ever made, giving the show a much-needed narrative reset that cut ties to things like Klingon wars and The Original Series legacy characters and sends it off to blaze its own path, unencumbered by the strings of existing canon. But now that Discovery is firmly established in the 32nd century, what can we expect from Star Trek: Discovery‘s upcoming Season 4? We have a few educated guesses…

Michael Burnham Finds Her Feet as Captain

Despite her colorful history as an officer – replete with mutiny, insubordination, and general recklessness – it’s been obvious for a long time that Michael Burnham was destined for the Discovery captain’s chair. The only question was a matter of when. But now that she’s there – what kind of captain will she be?

She could very easily turn out to be one of the Starfleet greats. Despite her flaws, Michael has proven time again that she is smart, capable, and brave. A risk-taker who always comes through in the clutch, she has saved her crew more times than most of us can count and she is a shining example of someone who absolutely believes in the mission of the Federation and the good it can do.

But she’s also often rash and impulsive, and just a few short episodes ago wasn’t even all that certain that she belonged in Starfleet anymore. Granted, many successful male Starfleet captains (cough cough James Kirk cough) are remembered as great precisely because they weren’t huge fans of following the rules, either, so there’s certainly precedent that generally refusing to play things safe is a workable leadership strategy.

Yet, Michael has always found her greatest success as a character when she has an authority figure or structure that is set in opposition to her, so it will be interesting to see how she evolves now that she is the authority she once pushed back against.

What’s Next for Saru?

At the conclusion of “That Hope Is You, Part 2,” Saru took a leave of absence from the Starfleet to go with the young Kelpian refugee Su’Kal back to their home planet of Kaminar. What’s next for him is unclear, but there’s no way Discovery’s planning on writing off this character completely – or losing the talents of actor Doug Jones.

So what’s next for Saru? If he does return to the Discovery, what role can he fulfill now that he’s no longer captain? Does his future lie in the Federation hierarchy somehow, possibly working for Admiral Vance or serving as some sort of ambassador to his people?

A third option could involve Saru taking on an entirely different kind of mission, one that looks a lot like fatherhood of a sort. Ever since his arrival in the 32nd century, Saru has longed to reconnect with his people. Perhaps showing young Su’Kal the stars he’s missed out on all his life is something that might allow him to do just that on a smaller, more intimate scale. (And indulge his dorky dad vibes at the same time.)

Gray Will Return Somehow

During Adira’s trip to the dilithium planet to ferry medicine to Saru and Culber, we learned that the holodeck program on the abandoned Kelpian ship could extrapolate Gray’s consciousness and give him a holographic form. This allowed him to be seen by the other Discovery crew members present, which means that the technology clearly exists which can bring Gray back to life again. Sort of, anyway.

 Because, of course, Gray is technically dead and his consciousness only exists as part of the Tal symbiont inside of Adira, which raises many questions this subplot will eventually have to answer, including how much agency and sentience post-Burn holograms even have to begin with. (Eli the Federation lie detector hologram certainly seems independent enough.)

Culber has promised both Adira and Gray that he will find a way for him to be seen again. But what that will ultimately look like, we don’t yet know. There is precedent for the idea that one part of a Trill’s symbiont memories can live outside it, but does that mean Gray will become a hologram himself permanently? Or can his consciousness be housed in something that has a more physical form?

What’s Book’s Actual Job Now Anyway?

Now that Cleveland Book – and we’re still waiting for the story behind that name, btw – is officially a part of the Discovery crew, it’s time for the series to define his role in this universe beyond his relationship with Michael. Is he technically part of Starfleet now? Is he an officer on Discovery? Does Grudge get a tiny decorated insignia collar? (Please say yes!)

Much of Book’s role in Season 3 was to support Michael in one way or another, whether that meant to literally help introduce her to the new rules of the 32nd century or to provide emotional and tactical help when needed. And don’t get me wrong, Book and Michael have somehow managed to form one of the most functional, normal relationships in Star Trek history. They’re honestly great together. But David Ajala is a tremendously appealing actor and if he’s going to stick around – which I think we’re all in agreement he should – Book needs a meaningful story of his own.

Tilly’s Promotion

Following Michael’s promotion to the Captain’s chair, it certainly looks like Tilly is getting some sort of command-level promotion in Season 4.

Technically she was still an Ensign when serving as Saru’s Acting First Officer, and while she conducted herself admirably during, well, everything, if she’s going to be Michael’s legitimate First Officer – which that last scene would definitely seem to indicate – she deserves to at least become a lieutenant.

Stamets and Michael Will Have to Work Out Their Issues

One of the lingering unresolved plotlines from Season 3 is the massive rift that formed between Paul Stamets and Michael following her decision to physically jettison him from Discovery while it was under Osyraa’s control. To be fair, her choice was completely the correct one, as he was the only one capable of operating the spore drive, and removing him from the equation meant that the Emerald Chain couldn’t just jump back to the Verubin Nebula and all its dilithium.

But, Stamets basically took that decision to mean that Michael was fine with condemning his family to horrific radiation deaths, and that’s going to be a hard thing for him to get over. If you notice, he’s the only person who doesn’t exactly look thrilled at Captain Burnham’s promotion, and we don’t see the two interact again once the ship is reclaimed.

There’s also the question of the spore drive itself. Stamets has tied his own identity – and his worth as part of the Discovery team – pretty tightly to his ability to communicate with the Mycelial network. Now that Book can do the same thing, how will this change things for him?

We’ll Probably See More Episodic Storytelling

Solving the mystery of The Burn and battling the villainous Emerald Chain were both season-long arcs that helped establish Discovery’s place in the future, and allowed Discovery the show to set up the new rules and players of its universe. But now that both those tasks have been accomplished, don’t be surprised if we see a shift toward more episodic storytelling in Season 4.

After all, with a fresh new supply of dilithium to distribute and the entire future to explore, isn’t it time we spent some time seeing what the 32nd century looks like? Some of the most entertaining moments of this season came when Michael and the rest of the Discovery crew found themselves on new planets or adjusting to changed cultures (including their own). Since Discovery purposefully removed itself from all known Star Trek canon, isn’t it time the show got about really establishing some new ones? The revelation that Vulcan and Romulan reunification has indeed happened feels like it should be just the beginning of the surprises this universe has in store for us. What has happened to other species such as Klingons or the Borg? Wouldn’t it be fun to find out?

The Grudge Content We Deserve

One of the few things Discovery fans of all stripes can agree on: Grudge is amazing. And we deserve to see more of her. Whether that means all our initial speculation turns out to be true and she’s actually the secret god of a planet full of telepathic felines we’ve yet to visit or just that she gets her own bridge-safe cat basket so she can hang out with Book and Michael next season, just give the people what they want.

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

Can we at least find out how she and Book ended up together? Throw me a bone – or I guess a cat treat – here, show. (Truly, if we don’t at least get a Short Treks episode about Grudge what are we even doing here?)

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