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bitterkarella · 2 months

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Midnight Pals: Dogs

Clive Barker: now everyone i want you all to welcome a real scary story by dodie smith Poe: um clive Poe: is this really appropriate Barker: oh yeah trust me this is gonna be REAL scary Barker: for dean Poe: are you doing this to torment dean Barker: whaaaat Barker: i would never

Dodie Smith: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the woman who kidnaps dogs Dean Koontz: what?! Koontz: you guys Koontz: you know I like scary stories Koontz: but you didn't tell me it was gonna be THIS scary

Barker: ahh poor dean, is this too much for you? Barker: i guess you could just go to bed and leave this one for the big kids Koontz: n-no Koontz: no i can take it King: that's the spirit dean King: you can do it

Dodie Smith: so there's this woman who kidnaps dogs Koontz: that's fine, i can handle this Smith: because she wants to skin them for a coat Koontz: guysssss Koontz: guyssss i hate thisss Barker: ah ha ha Poe: oh really clive this is too much

Smith: so the important thing is there's this guy mr dearly Smith: now the government lets him live tax free for life cuz he solved a really hard math problem King: King: uh King: i don't think that's the way that works

Smith: no no that's legit i checked Smith: that's how we do it in the UK King: King: clive? Barker: That doesn't sound right, but I don't know enough about math to dispute it

Smith: so anyway mr dearly marries this woman Smith: and his dog marries her dog Smith: also they both have nannies Koontz: do the nannies also get married? Smith: haha of course not dean they're both ladies Smith: nanny butch and nanny femme are just really good platonic friends

Smith: but there's a problem Smith: the dearlys adopt ANOTHER dalmatian, perdita Smith: and this dog Smith: is NOT married Barker: and that's a problem huh? Smith: OF COURSE IT'S A PROBLEM Smith: you can't just have this dog slutting it up around town!

Smith: so the married dogs, pongo and missus, go on a merry adventure to save their puppies from the insane woman who wants to skin them for a coat Smith: and when the adventure is over Smith: they need to buy a bigger house to home all their 97 puppies

Smith: luckily mr dearly solved another problem to help the government pay its taxes Poe: wait why does the government have to pay taxes Smith: oh we do things differently in the UK Poe: yeah, evidently

Smith: perdita's original owners come back Smith: and the dearlys are afraid that they'll want perdita back Smith: but they're all "oh we didn't actually like her all that much, you can keep her" Koontz: wait someone doesn't like a dog? Koontz: this is breaking my immersion

Smith: but then some other people come by and they have a dog too Smith: and it turns out that this is perdita's dog husband! Smith: and these people are all "oh, i guess you can have this dog" Smith: "you know, since they're already dog married"

Smith: oh also the dearlys get a cat Smith: the cat also gets married Barker: christ why are all these animals getting married Smith: what, you want them living in sin? Koontz: yeah clive you want them living in sin?? Barker: i just Koontz: that would be immoral clive!!! Barker:

Smith: anyway then everyone is matched up in a nice monogamous, hetero-sex pair Smith: just the way it should be! Piers Anthony: yeah yeah now THAT'S the way you end a story!

#midnight pals #the midnight society #midnight society #stephen king #clive barker #edgar allan poe #dean koontz #dodie smith #piers anthony

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polaroidcats · 1 month

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hiiii cat i’m jumping in on these unhinged disney aus with minimal context so some of these may already have been proposed but:

- the fox and the hound with fox remus and hound sirius

- bambi au with james as bambi, remus as thumper and sirius as flower

- 101 werepuppies feat. bellatrix as cruella

- rapunzel remus, flynn rider sirius (this one isn’t unhinged I just think it’d be cute)

- house of black encanto with sirius as bruno

- timon and pumba wolfstar, harry being simba and james mufasa

hii lynx so happy to have you on board for the wolfstar disney aus agenda!!!! 💖

YESSSSSS I LOVE THE FOX AND THE HOUND WOLFSTAR AU! LOOK AT THEM!!

WOLFSTARBUCKS:

hahahahah omg i love this so much, james as bambi, remus as thumper and sirius as flower is perfect!!!

101 werepuppies!!!!!!! 😭🥺😭🥺 I guess they were REALLY busy during knock him up november... but yess omg bellatrix would be an amazing cruella!! also are remus and sirius pongo and perdita or are they the humans ?? hahah are jily the humans?? or are r and s humans who have werepuppies like in the original werepuppy au?

okay see, you say rapunzel remus, flynn rider sirius, and I totally agree it would be cute and Sirius would be an amazing flynn rider and I also agree that in a better world Remus totally deserves to be a disney princess, however may I offer you instead a cursed alternative: Rapunzel Sirius and Pascal Remus!!!! @fxreflyes has made me realise that Sirius deserves to be as many different disney princesses as possible, and it's only logical to make Remus the cute little animal sidekick!!

I haven't seen encanto yet so I'm trusting you on that one!! Really exposing my disney knowledge gaps here whoops! 🙈

hahahah omg okay yes I can totally see timon and pumba wolfstar, though I also think timon and pumba could be great as prongsfoot!! who would be who though?? 🤔 But yes I guess it makes a lot of sense to have harry as simba and james as mufasa 😭😭😭

#thank u for this ask #i love this new agenda hehehehe these were so fun!!#lynx tag #ask #disney marauders au agenda

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rose-tea-and-strawberries · 1 year

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You know what would be adorable? Yuu introduces cut bento box art to the House of Mouse because she brought one for her lunch break. It becomes a part of the kids menu made by Yuu herself. The kids love the cartoon shaped rice balls. Simba and the Dalmatian puppies even get bentos that look like them.

Bonus is that people hear about the anime trope of a girl making bento boxes for her love interest.

Okay okay okay, so I've always had this headcanon that Yuu makes bento boxes for Grim and Adeuce which makes literally every single NRC boy really jealous when she hands it to them every lunchtime at the cafeteria. They taste so good and look amazing and Pinterest worthy every time (Cater's crying at the missed Magicam opportunity). Like Grim's ones are usually cat shaped, Ace's are mainly heart-shaped becuase he grumbles at how cute and unmanly the adorably bunny/animal ones are (don't worry he loves them really) and Deuce's are little baby chicks/ducklings and he feels guilty for eating them because they're so adorable and he just wants to keep them in there forever (boi, it's food. It will rot). Meanwhile everyone else is just glaring at them with simmering jealousy.

Yeah, I've always thought that Yuu likes giving/doing things with the kids/baby animals like making flower crowns/necklaces for Dumbo or DIY toys for Pongo and Perdita's puppies (the parents are incredibly impressed at her ability to not only make 101 but she's personalized them and gives them to the correct participant by calling to them by name) or giving Marie new pink ribbons so her making little animal friendly bento boxes is not out of the question. Even the older human kids like them so Mickey allows her to make them in the kitchen as long as she doesn't overwork herself.

I bet that either Huey, Dewey or Louie (or Roxanne) lets it slip to the club that bento boxes are an anime trope and now the club goers are trying to get Yuu to make and give one to the boys.

Honeslty, Yuu kind of forgot about the shoujo manga-ness of bento boxes and just thinks of them as a cute way to show that she cares so when she does make them for the boys she has no idea why they get so flustered. Idia flat out blue screens. His hears just explodes into pink and Ortho has to make him regain his senses.

#house of mouse au #asks #twst #twst yuu #twisted wonderland #fem yuu

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redgoldsparks · 5 months

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November 2023 Reading and Reviews by Maia Kobabe

I post my reviews throughout the month on Storygraph and Goodreads, and do roundups here and on patreon. Reviews below the cut.

Frankisstein by Jeanette Winterson read by John Sackville and Perdita Weeks

This book has three different story lines, one of which is much stronger than the other two, which is making it hard for me to figure out how I want to rate the book. The opening story line, and my favorite, is about Mary Shelley during the period in which she wrote Frankenstein. These scenes especially in the audiobook are beautifully read and atmospheric, damp, melancholy, introspective, with engaging characterizations of Byron, Percy Shelley, and the other guests of the house. The second story line is about Ry Shelley, a trans doctor living in post-Brexit Britain who becomes entangled romantically and criminally with Victor Stein, a researcher focused on AI, cryogenic preservation and reanimation, and training robots to detect human diseases. Ry is fairly genderfluid, and is often described as both a man and a woman, or a boy who is a girl who is a boy. I appreciated having a trans POV character in this book, but wished Ry had more of his own ambitions and plot- he seemed to exist primarily to have conversations and sex with Victor, who insisted over and over that he wasn't gay even after falling for and sleeping with Ry. Ry also interviews and then is repeatedly misgendered by Ron Lord, a Welsh entrepreneur in the sex robot industry- there is a lot in this book about sex bots, including huge chunks of uninterrupted dialogue by Ron Lord that got fairly repetitive in audio. Ry is also the victim of a bathroom sexual assault near the end of the book that felt thematically unnecessary and punishing. I can imagine a different version of this book where Ry was the one conducting the research that Victor does in this book, and his love interest is a modern version of Percy, which might have interested me more. There's also a third partial story line about Mary Shelley meeting a man named Victor Frankenstein who claims to be the character from her book; these didn't add anything for me. Would I recommend this? Hard to say. It's a complicated queer remix of Frankenstein and I was engaged while listening to the majority of it but there were also pieces that fell short of my expectations.

The Hills of Estrella Roja by Ashley Robin Franklin

High school senior Mari is woken from a nightmare about voices calling to her from a pit in a cave to learn that her grandmother is dead. Mari, her mom, and her little sister drive back to Estrella Roja, their small mysterious Texas hometown. Meanwhile, Kat, a college freshman who runs a podcast about the paranormal with her best friend, receives an anonymous email tip about the "devil lights" of Estrella Roja and decides to solo road trip to investigate it over her spring break. Kat can't find anyone in town willing to to talk to her... except Mari, who is both sad and bored, and can't seem to connect with any of her close-mouthed relatives. The two stumble across something in the desert that was spooky enough to make me wonder if I should be reading the book before bedtime. This story weaves a queer meet-cute with a dark family history into a very effective YA horror tale. The inking and coloring are absolutely gorgeous. Scary, but not too scary for me, a known scaredy cat!

The Dyslexic Advantage by Brock L Eide and Fernette F Eide

I highly recommend this book to anyone who has dyslexia, is parenting a young person with dyslexia, works in education at any level or is just in general interested in how differing brain structures effect things such as working memory, 3D visualization, problem solving, and other areas of cognition. I've known I was dyslexic since I was about 8 years old, but I had never picked up a book on the topic. I found this very interesting and very easy to read (its printed in a san-serif font with large page margins, and also short well-structured chapters). It contains many real-life stories of people with dyslexia rising to the very pinnacle of their chosen fields as well as a good section of layperson's neuroscience of brain structure and some of the latest research on memory formation. The authors do an excellent job highlighting how so many of the things that are cast as weaknesses or drawbacks in dyslexic students' early education are often reshaped into strengths later in life. Multiple times the authors emphasized that while dyslexic students should receive extra instruction in reading in early childhood, that they probably won't catch up their peers until later in life, often in high school or beyond and that one of the most important things is never letting the dyslexic student give up on their own ability to learn, thrive, and succeed. Most dyslexics are late bloomers, but as the book says, "time is on your side."

Divine Rivals by Rebecca Ross read by Alex Wingfield and Rebecca Norfolk

Set in a kind of fantasy WWI, this story follows Iris, a young woman who had to drop out of high school after her brother enlisted and her only other relative, her mother, fell into depression and alcoholism and lost her job. Iris begins working at a newspaper, vying for a regular columnist position against her office rival, handsome and wealthy Roman Kitt. Iris has a magical typewriter, and she writes letters to her brother regularly, even though she's never received one back from him. She slips these letters under the door of her wardrobe and in the morning they are gone. What she doesn't know is that the letters are making their way into the bedroom of Roman, who also has a magic typewriter. They begin a correspondence and a budding friendship. But a series of misfortunes befall Iris and she decides to enlist at the front as a wartime journalist. Will Roman follow the woman he's beginning to fall for? Will he ever tell Iris than he is her penpal confidant? This story was fast paced and interesting throughout, but at the end I was left with some critiques. Primarily, the way the book simplifies war by making the cause of war a divine conflict outside of mortal responsibility. It felt like an extremely watered down version of a wartime romance, with none of the political questions that would have plagued the characters had the book been set in actual WWI or WWII. The book also has a cliffhanger ending, and sets up a plot twist that will probably delight some readers but which unfortunately falls into one of my LEAST fantasy favorite romance tropes. So I will not be reading the second one unless someone else reads it first and spoils some of the plot for me!

Land of Milk and Honey by C Pam Zhang read by Eunice Wong

What a delicious book, in many senses of that word! The unnamed main character is a Chinese-American chef from Los Angeles who is stranded in London by natural disaster. A toxic gray smog envelopes the majority of the world, killing most crops and animals. Countries close their borders as their populations being to starve. The chef is offered an unbelievable job in a billionaire's small private country, a mountaintop in Italy which still has access to some sunlight and caters to a set of unbelievably wealthy residents who bought their way in. The chef lies on her resume, padding it out a fictional degree from a French culinary school and experience at closed Micheline start restaurant. The chef is granted access to the country for a probation period and re-encounters a lush array of ingredients she thought were extinct from the world: fresh berries and greens, rich cream and butter, unpreserved meats and fish. Under the cold eye of her cruel employer and his charismatic and ambitious daughter the chef tries to prove she can cook dishes that will astonish the 1%. Little does she know she was hired as much for her skill in lying as her ability to cook well. This book had more queerness, more speculative elements, and more hope for a world destroyed by human greed than I was expecting. The descriptions of food, flavors, textures, and the intersection of appetite with pleasure are rich, powerful and evocative. I really enjoyed this and I particularly recommend the audiobook.

The Mysteries by Bill Watterson and John Kascht

Watterson's first offering in many years is a strange little picture book. This fable opens with a kingdom surrounded by a deep dark forest. The people are fearful of mysteries which live in the forest, so the king sends his knights into the forest to capture a mystery. Most return empty handed, or do not return at all. One knight captures a mystery and it is not what the people expected. The art is quite elegant, black and white photographs of dolls posed in blurry but evocative settings. The story is very slight, and I'm not sure it delivered on the depth it seemed to be reaching for. Maybe check this one out from the library rather than buying it.

Everything is Beautiful and I Am Not Afraid by Yao Xiao

I've been following Yao Xiao's work online for several years and I'm really glad I finally made time to read the collection! The brightly colored pages are full of small, poem-like comics that circle and return to multiple themes: self-esteem, coming out as queer, being a Chinese American immigrant living in the US, trust, taking up space, trusting in one's own strength and the love of friends and community. The artist draws themself as a small character with orange hair and a black elf hat and moves like a spite through urban landscapes, clouds, dreams, gardens, hopes, fears and other elements of the unconscious. There's no overarching narrative, but the many small experiences add up to a greater sum than their parts.

Fool’s Errand by Robin Hobb read by Nick Taylor

This book begins 15 years after the end of the Farseer trilogy. Fitz, the bastard son of royalty, trained as an assassin, who survived torture, a war, a coup, multiple attempts on his life, a long dangerous journey, deadly magic, and the death of his king and close friend, has retired to a small cottage near the sea. He lives a small peaceful life there with his old wolf, Nighteyes, his adopted son Hap, a pony, some chickens, and a garden. He's working on his memoirs. Then the world turns up at his door again, demanding as much of himself as he has to give, again. Kettricken's son, the Farseer heir, is missing and no one knows if he was kidnapped or ran away or something more sinister. This story was EVERYTHING I WANTED AND MORE! One of the best books I've read this year, a rich, emotional, satisfying return to the Farseer world. I love how this book deepened and complicated Fitz's relationships from the previous book: with Chade, Starling, Nighteyes and most especially with the Fool who is once again living at court in a completely new guise. Every character in this series feels so real, so grounded, so impacted by the events of the world, and the consequences of their own choices. I've been disappointed by a lot of the fantasy I've read this year, but this one not only met but exceeded my expectations- especially because I read this book once before, when I was 16, and didn't love it then. Now I am obsessed with it. I think I just wasn't ready to read a book about adults and the uncaring passage of time as a teenager. Literally thirty minutes after finished the audiobook of this book I started the sequel because I couldn't wait to find out what happened next!

#reading #books #comics #book reviews #audiobooks

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