#or perhaps like almond syrup

[the-almighty-god]

Hey God. Sorry I don't have a whale for you. Or a fancy code. But do you know where the Book is? And what to do with it when we find it?

Eric the demon

Hello, Eric. Under normal circumstances, I'd tell you to come back when you can make a whale.

But Judgement Day and the Second Coming aren't normal circumstances.

If you're looking for the Book of Life, I believe @the-metatron keeps it in his briefcase.

If you manage to get it from the Metatron without him noticing--and that is a big if--then I'd give it to my Son, @one-coming-is-enough for safekeeping.

Ideally, I'd take it myself. But I need pull myself together before that's possible. Maybe you can help with that too.

#the almighty answers #an actual answer for once #ineffable #good omens #the plot thickens like honey #or perhaps like almond syrup

[most-normal-eccles-cake-ignorer]

celestial surveillance + some garden of eden parallels

For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought out into the open. - Luke 8:17 (NIV)

Over and over, we see how the bookshop feels safe/private while simultaneously being sort of a fishbowl, leaving its inhabitants quite exposed to onlookers. *garden of eden vibes*

Similarly, Aziraphale and Crowley tried to conduct a class-A surreptitious 6000+ year agreement/slowburn romance and yet their 25 Lazarii relationship is fairly obvious to others.

Reminiscent of how Crowley is painfully aware that nothing is certain and time is horribly finite, Aziraphale lives with the knowledge that anything he does or says can be used against him—or much worse, used against Crowley or others our little guardian cares about. Unlike his emotional support demon, however, Aziraphale was afraid Before the Beginning, before The Fall.

While Upstairs aren't the only ones watching, they have the potential to be the most dangerous threat (emphasis on potential bc they have to take an interest and also maybe stumble into important clues): The heavenly office overlooks the entire world. Where Hell had to send Furfur to the theatre with a camera, Heaven's got Earth Observation Files they can pull up to see what someone was doing at any point in history—not even St. James Park can keep you anonymous in the face of thirty-seven classes of scriveners/recording angels!

Aziraphale may tend to underestimate danger in general because of his misplaced hope that Heaven is truly Good, but in the same way that he can be both clever and stupid, I think he trusts Heaven and fears it at the same time. Why else would he be so worried about breaking their rules even when he knows they are wrong?

Of course, Aziraphale is also a courageous little bastard with a deity-defying protective streak! Despite Heaven's indoctrination, we see him navigating all sorts of grey area as he learns to 'blur the edges'. But he knows it isn’t safe to do that openly. He keeps this more human side hidden and tries not to think too hard about why doing good is wrong in heavens eyes. (lol other people's aziraphale metas are my main food group rn)

At the end of S2, we see him leave A.Z. Garden & Co. after tasting the forbidden fruit large oat milk latte, armed with his naïve/misguided 'knowledge of Good and Evil'. (and perhaps he knows he can't 'let the sun can’t go down' on him in Soho lest the the Metatron mete out death instead of coffees?) When Adam and Eve left Eden, Aziraphale and Crowley observed from above. When the angel and demon leave their own garden, we get the sense that they are also being watched.

(also idk if this is anything but Adam facing off against the lion while Eve looks on in the bg seemed a bit like Crowley watching Aziraphale walk into danger w the Metatron. could be a good sign since the lion gets turned into salami)

There are hints at the end of S2 that the watching is getting a little a spicier (at least I think they are hints haha): the bookshop windows are still broken during the last part of E6, further decreasing privacy; the zombies used binoculars to watch A&C from the Dirty Donkey under cover of darkness in 1941 but the Metatron just looks across the road in the light of day. And then there's the whole 'hefty jigger of almond syrup'.

#im watching you wazowski always watching #also i'm just thinking jigger -> jiggery-pokery = trickery?? that's got to be on purpose right? *admiral ackbar voice* ITS A TRAP #good omens meta #good omens analysis #the metatron #a.z.fell & co. #the garden of eden #good omens #good omens 2 #good omens s2e6 #the final fifteen #aziraphale #crowley #lol this started as a paragraph in the GO:Lockdown Aziraphale draft but it was getting too big so here we are #i'll finish it eventually but i just like looking at everything everyone else is posting sm and i get distracted #a.z. fell and co.

[onceuponapuffin]

Fanatic Intervention Part 9!!

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*****************

You pound your way to the nearest bar, where everyone had agreed to meet. The three of them are standing around, talking over glasses of wine. Your hands are in fists, your nails digging into your palms as you approach. They acknowledge you as you enter their field of vision, but you say nothing. Instead, you beeline for Aziraphale, put your arms around him, and hang on for dear life. Sometimes you just need to hug an angel.

There’s a pause where Anathema says something about your aura, and then Aziraphale hugs you back.

Dear Reader, I’m not sure if it ever happened in your life, but for this Puffin there came a time when it was made very clear that wanting to be held or wanting to lean on another person in public was unacceptable (and, in fact, embarrassing) once you reached a certain age. And yet, we as humans are social creatures. The need to be held is a very normal response, especially after something particularly upsetting happens (like having the sanctity of washroom privacy violated, for example). Perhaps you’re not the kind of person who, out of nowhere, feels the desire to be held, but perhaps you know someone who is. And so, I would like to impress upon you the incredible difference it makes, the immeasurable relief it brings, to know that you have someone with you who will hold you back without question or comment. Just hold you, and wait.

Aziraphale makes it clear he intends to do just that.

“Take your time, dear,” he says gently. And so you do.

After a moment, the clink of a glass next to you makes you look up. Someone has given you a glass of the same wine everyone else has. You pull away and take a sip, feeling much calmer and very grateful.

“Thanks,” You say.

“Anytime,” Aziraphale replies.

“What happened?” Anathema asks.

Thus, you recount how Metatron trapped you in the washroom until he had said his peace. By the time you finish, there are three very angry faces around you. You feel validated enough to take another, much larger, sip of the wine. Aziraphale is the first to speak.

“Well for starters, I invite you to stay in my bookshop however long you like. Pet indeed! You are a help, yes, but you are a guest, and certainly not disposable, whatever he says.”

“And,” Crowley adds, “From what you said, Aziraphale and I can get you home whenever you want anyway. Probably, I mean. No dUbIOus motives involved, at least.”

Anathema seems to be thinking. After another few seconds, she asks:

“Why did you take the coffee?”

You all look at her, surprised.

“Well I mean,” she continues, “If the Metatron wants to know, he probably has a reason. If you tell us, maybe we can figure it out for ourselves and find a way around it.”

“Or they could just not tell him,” Crowley suggests with snark. “Then it doesn’t matter.”

“I mean, it might,” Anathema counters, “We don’t know that it doesn’t.”

“I took it because of the Coffee Theory,” You say with a shrug. It’s not like it’s a big deal. “But I mean, I don’t know why that would matter to him.”

“Well,” Anathema says, “That might depend on what the Coffee Theory is.”

“Well, it’s the idea that the Metatron did something to that coffee he was going to give Aziraphale. To, like, make Aziraphale trust him, or listen to him or whatever, so that he would go back to Heaven.” You pause. “There’s also an interpretation of it where it was a metaphor like ‘take my offer or face death.’ But most people think about the first one, and that’s the one that was in my brain when I did it. There aren’t a lot of people who actually believe it. I mean, not anymore, anyway.”

“So you think the Metatron drugged Aziraphale’s coffee?” Anathema raises an eyebrow. “And you drank it, yes? So...did he?”

“No,” You reply, “It was exactly what it was supposed to be. An oat milk latte with almond syrup. And I didn’t think he actually messed with it. I just wasn’t willing to take the chance, that’s all.”

Crowley’s face scrunches. “And you think he might need to know that for some reason?” He looks pointedly at Anathema.

“He might,” She gives a thoughtful hum. “I’ll think about it. I might ask the Cards later.”

-----------

The wait for boarding didn’t feel so long after that. As you board, you notice how spacious First Class is. Aziraphale and Crowley sit in the seats ahead of you and Anathema, with Aziraphale in the window seat. You notice Crowley casually trying to stick his legs out into the aisle and wonder vaguely whether it’s because he needs the space, or to try and trip the flight attendants. Both? Probably both. Okay, definitely both, you note, as a stewardess almost falls face-first into the aisle. Aziraphale gently swats at Crowley in reprimand, but you can tell it’s half-hearted and wholly-fond.

Your only trouble comes when you need to use the washroom, but Anathema, ever clever and aura-observant, suggests to go with you so that you can knock if anything goes wrong. Thankfully, nothing does, and you both return to your seats.

“You know,” Anathema says, leaning forward, “I just overheard the strangest thing. It seems that all of the normal airline food on this plane has gone missing. All that they have to serve is the first-class food.”

“Wait,” You say, holding back a laugh, “So everyone on this flight gets to eat the fancy, chef-prepared, gourmet meals?”

Crowley doesn’t hold back his laugh. “Oh, the big bosses won’t like that!”

“You two wouldn’t have had anything to do with that, would you?” Anathema asks suspiciously. You notice she’s smiling while she says it.

“Psh!” Crowley waves away the thought. “Why would I? Doesn’t matter to me either way.”

“Honestly, Miss Device,” Aziraphale adds, “I have no idea why you immediately accuse us of something that seems so clearly to be a mere...clerical error.”

Ah-ha! Culprit found. Clerical error your arse.

“You know,” You sigh, “It really is no wonder why Crowley loves you so much.”

“Ngk,” says Crowley. Aziraphale responds with a pleased-sounding hum. You relax, and notice between the seats that Aziraphale places his hand on top of Crowley’s and leaves it there.

They like holding hands – your insides scream.

--------

When you disembark from the plane, you hear all the other passengers around you complimenting the flight attendants on the excellent food and promising to leave excellent reviews online. You keep your laughter as quiet as you can. Aziraphale’s little prank is going to cause the airline issues for YEARS. Crowley must be so proud.

The speed and ease with which you clear customs and baggage claim is probably because you’re traveling with two supernatural entities. In no time at all, you’re outside of the airport flagging down a cab. Crowley opens the door with enthusiasm and outright glee.

“After you, Angel,” he says, “You think 90 miles an hour in London is bad, I can’t wait for you to see this!”

Dear Reader, I don’t know if you have ever been to New York City, but I assure you that Crowley’s driving has nothing on the NYC cabbies. Aziraphale spends the entire drive trying to hold on to something and taking deep breaths as the cab violently jerks to a stop millimeters from the car in front. You suggest he close his eyes. He does. It doesn’t seem to help.

-------

The taxi lets you out in front of The Ritz. Because of course you’re staying at The Ritz. Aziraphale goes to check in while Crowley tells Anathema he needs the washroom, and mutters to you that he wants to empty all the soap dispensers. You try so hard to hold in your laughter that it comes out your nose anyway. The demon flashes you a cheeky grin before disappearing around the corner. Anathema looks at you.

“Probably been a while since he had a fresh audience,” You say to her. She chuckles.

“And you’re so obliging too. No doubt he’s having a great time with all this.”

“Hey, Anathema,” You begin uncertainly, “How...I mean...I’m just worried about...things. How are we going to find Jesus anyway? I just...I don’t really have anymore information to give. I don’t even know if he’s going to be a baby or an adult this time.”

“Hm...” Anathema thinks for a minute, “Well, I’m going to try and get some readings, see if I can get some kind of direction for us to go in. It’s a big country, but what I’m hoping is that it will sort of work like dowsing.”

“Dowsing? Like looking for water with sticks?”

“Sort of. In a nutshell, you pay attention to the vibrations in the Earth, and the closer you get, the stronger the vibrations become. It makes sense to think that Jesus would make pretty noticeable vibrations. That’s my working hypothesis anyway.”

You nod. That will do for now. Aziraphale and Crowley both return, with the demon wiping his hands on his trousers, and the four of you take the elevator to your room.

The Royal Suite.

“Are...you….serious??” Anathema asks. Honestly, you’re too stunned looking around the enormous suite with four bedrooms to say anything. It’s bigger than most houses. You take out your phone and start taking pictures.

“Well, if we’re going to stay at The Ritz,” Aziraphale says cheerfully, pronouncing the capital letters, “Best to do it Properly.”

“But this is ridiculous!”

Aziraphale isn’t paying attention anymore. He’s gone to tell Crowley not to draw mustaches on the expensive artwork.

“Unlimited resources,” You say to her, “Make for expensive taste.”

“No, kidding,” she sighs, “I’m glad you’re here. I’m gonna need some help with these two.”

Ha, You think to yourself, I knew it.

❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ 🖤

Beginning || Previous || Next

^ If you want to see JUST how ridiculous the royal suite is.

#good omens #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #good omens 2 #good omens fanart #someone said this counts as art #so i'm using the fanart tag #so nyeah #good omens fandom #aziracrow lasts forever #aziraphale x crowley #crowley likes showing off #especially if he knows there's someone there to appreciate his skillz #that's skillz #with a z #fanatic intervention #part 9 #poll fic #let's write #we're all in this together #fix it #go2 #i rode in a cab in nyc once it was terrifying #anathema #crowley and aziraphale #good omens 3 #writeblr #writers on tumblr

[beebopboom]

Words of a Wise Angel

(Intro, part 1, part 2, part 3)

Finally made it to the end - four post later for a character that only has around 10 minutes of screen time - and there was going to be more

Originally this was going to be how the Metatron fashioned himself the king in God's game of chess and was going to relate it to Shakespearean Kings heck we were even going to go into Monty Python and the Holy Grail - but honestly I kind of just lost the motivation……maybe in the future I'll revisit.

However I still got shit to say.

(oh my god how did this get so long - I promise I’m a little sane over here)

So let's look into his actions in the show and maybe fill in some blanks

Disclaimer: just want to say I am focusing on The Metatron (obviously), his pov, and how he twist things - not what happened between Aziraphale and Crowley in the final 15, besides like one thing - just heavy emphasis on that

The Judge

(Of a very weird courtroom)

The trial itself seems to mirror Hell's trial in the way there is no true defense - I’m sensing a pattern

In the trial of Gabriel he is centered in the middle - at this moment neither left or right

He doesn't cut in until Gabriel starts going on about what an angel just gotta do sometimes- and brings up a reminder of what happened to the last angel of his position that started with this way of thinking - it after all is a great story for controlling and best not be repeated because then it looks bad on Heaven's part

This establishes The Metatron as a character whose main concern is the reputation of Heaven - that even though this is an action that is casting out worthy he won’t can’t do it because then it would be an upheaval.

But he frames it as a kindness, as if he was doing a favor - it's manipulative, it keeps the "Heaven is all good, here look we are doing a special favor just for you” narrative going

After Gabriel leaves he moves to the side and brings up that it is taking him a while to come back but for the most part takes a backseat to the happenings around him until they start talking about ringing the alarm bells -

He tells them they are just going to have to find him and he is amused about it. Which tells me a few things

that he doesn't want this getting out yet- fewer that know the better

he didn't actually care about what happened to Gabriel - in fact this might even be a better outcome for him in the way he just doesn't have to deal with him any more

he doesn't actually think they will find him

this might just be a great story - let’s just let it play out

Now this is all happening right before episode 1 perhaps bleeding into the time where Crowley and Shax are talking (which begs the question of how does Shax know) - so it is days before we see him again, a very eventful few days

The First move

When he does show back up he’s in a corporation and getting coffee - second in line behind Mrs. Sandwich.

And his eye is on Crowley - he watches Crowley converse with these two humans and bring Mr. Brown back

Now the coffee shop - I lied I do have something to add

So before even ordering what is he witnessing? Maggie and Nina having a moment - where Nina accepts Maggie's offer of help and asks her to go get milk for her and we as an audience can see this is a big moment for Nina.

Now imagine what it is to a staple of Whickber St. and someone who is not hesitant to tell her opinion about Nina's relationship and just so happens to be first in line, Mrs. Sandwich. I would not be surprised at all if she made a remark to Nina - a remark The Metatron overheard, so now he has the following information

they are friendly with Crowley

something is up with their relationship

But now it's his turn to order - and Maggie is back how long did your order take Sandwich!? - and asks for his oatmilk latte with almond syrup and his whole human picking coffee over death being predictable thing - and yet this isn't the end of their conversation

The next time we see Maggie and Nina they are getting ready to head back over to the bookshop but what got them on this conversation in the first place? That's right I'm suggesting the Metatron said or did something. Nothing to overt but something that got them thinking, talking, and maybe wanting to confront a certain duo about it

But back to the Metatron - he has entered the bookshop and interrupted Michael

Now the Metatron has always been a character that uses human expressions and his funny little words. But he comes right out the gate with balderdash and piffle so lets talk about them

They mean practically the same thing and yet he repeats it twice so why? I think it has something to do with their origins

Balderdash - although it is not certain it is said to originate during Shakespearean times, around this time though would have been used to describe a mixed drink

Piffle - started to appear 1860 - 1870ish

They are also both games and when you search them together it is a british show that goes into the origins of words - so yeah just keep those dates in mind

He uses Crowley to point out who he is - the demon who has a bad history with him, another subtle reminder of what going against Heaven gets you.

Then he starts up with the praise for Aziraphale who actually says his name, and we see a shift in tone from when he is addressing Aziraphale and then ordering the Archangels back to Heaven - which here is another one of the human phrases, spit spot

Spit spot - I don't know exactly when it was created but it is most commonly recognized as something Mary Poppins said, which the books where published between 1934 - 1988 with the movie coming out in 1964

But anyway (I promise there is a point to those) the Archangels reaction to him, Uriel's specifically. They are nervous, they are stuttering, they are praising him - they are groveling in front of him as if he were a king, and it reminds me of the scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz. But the Metatron has no time for them and dismisses them. (Lord I talk about this moment a lot)

Ah, just him and Aziraphale now (not really) and they need to have a chinwag

Chinwag - around the 1870s

In response to Aziraphale saying he has made his position quite clear he offers him the coffee - which we know is not something Aziraphale prefers to drink - he offers another option that Aziraphale would not normally take, foreshadowing much?

well I say offered but really it’s kinda shoved in his face.

He separates Aziraphale and Crowley - leaving Crowley behind with a glare and ominous music which really is the first blatant instance of us knowing that the something that is up - is bad

and guess who enters the bookshop - Maggie and Nina here to talk about relationships and interference - convenient timing almost like it was influenced by someone

We join back with the Metatron when he is telling Aziraphale he doesn’t have to make a decision yet and to go tell his friend the good news and then he blends back into the crowd to walk to Muriel at the coffee shop and encourages them to read books. He proceeds to stand up and look into the bookshop, watching

Now the bits of conversation we see from Aziraphale- I see this as a few possible different things

this is the actual conversation and Aziraphale is telling Crowley an edited version

this is the edited version that he is telling Crowley and something else happened

he didn’t edit it and this is actually what happened and what was told to Crowley

but all I know is we didn’t see this full conversation and it reminded me of the misunderstanding conversation between the Nuns last season - either way it's what we got to work with people

Before moving on there are a couple particular sentences I want to point out from this conversation - and I will get to these later

"It's why Gabriel came to you in the first place, I imagine. There are huge plans afoot, enormous projects, and I will need you to run them.”

"Yeah, I've been looking back over a number of your previous exploits, and I see that in quite a few of them you formed a de facto partnership with the demon, Crowley. Now, if you wanted to work with him again, that might be considered irregular, but it would certainly be within your jurisdiction to restore your friend, Crowley, to full angelic status”

The Aftermath

Upon entering the bookshop and getting Aziraphale to say what they both already know happened out loud - he immediately chimes in with the rhetoric of “this is how Crowley always was, he chose this and his actions are his own doing - you Aziraphale are making the right choice here, you can’t change those who don’t want to, those who are damned”

congratulations Metatron you got what you wanted - pls this is sarcastic I’m still salty

Now that he has basically taken care of everything in his way of getting Aziraphale to come with him - he asks if he is ready to go (at no point yet has Aziraphale actually said yes) and asks if he needs to bring anything with him, a dig and a probe to see if there is anything else. He then just starts walking, not waiting for Aziraphale - a manipulation tactic to pull him along

and on the walk to the lift and in waiting keeps giving Aziraphale praise and then finally revealing The Second Coming as he gets in the lift which makes Aziraphale have to choose - it’s the final one and he still has to make it seem as though he actually had a choice.

But what does this all mean? What was the point of doing all this? Why does he need Aziraphale?? What’s with the word choices?

What’s with your funny words, Magic Man?

some of the dates might have rang a little familiar - Shakespeare? the 1860s? Mary Poppins? They are all around the times Aziraphale and Crowley were meeting up - well duh they’ve been meeting up since practically forever

the Mary Poppins one you could look at two ways - the actual time period they were being released, which would have been the 1941 or 1967 dates, or the fact that Crowley inspired his Nanny look after her

Looking at past exploits indeed you were Metatron, or perhaps you were even there hmmmm…

EDIT

The Metatron just used words that are from some important times,

1601 - discussing their arrangement (them working together)

1862 - their holy water fight and then not talking to each other

1967 (or 1941) - they start working and meeting up again and the holy water disagreement is put to rest.

and then he eventually hits him with, "if you wanted to work with him again”

which interestingly enough seems to hit the insecurities that Aziraphale expressed in the coffee shop, on the head - that loss of structure and purpose.

Aziraphale and Crowley also just did some big moves on their own in the bookshop and heaven - ones they weren't working together on. “You came back” is starting to hit even harder

End Edit

But also The Metatron put emphasis on the word friend when referring to Crowley, for the most part he referred to him as “demon” until then, until he pulled his final card - such an interesting word that had such an impact on Aziraphale in 1941 - well played Metatron well played (I hate it)

Now this could have all been a coincidence - if Aziraphale hadn’t picked up on the same thing.

When he interrupts Crowley he says something along the lines, “what’s that lovely human expression, hold that thought”

Hold that thought - came into play around the 70s through 90s and gained popularity due to the rise of broadcast television, like the News. But there is one definition I want to point out as well - “Used to acknowledge that one's attention needs to be diverted from what a speaker was saying.”

or in other words, “remember all those human expressions the Metatron was saying, yeah those have meaning and so does the one I’m about to say - we are being watched don’t pay attention to my words” but well we aren’t gonna talk about it (pls I’m still coping)

The Metatron has certainly done his research - bringing up words and phrases from important times in their relationship - and The Metatron is certainly watching just like he was now

Why does he need Aziraphale?

Now if you remember back when I discussed who The Metatron was in scripture there is actually an interesting overlap between these two with Tree of Knowledge and The Tree of Life - The Beginning and The End. Aziraphale was always meant to have a special part in The Second Coming for the exact reasons The Metatron said - an angel of his talents, an angel who knows about humans - the angel that guards them

But even just ignoring all that - What literally just happened before he showed up

called for Heaven’s help in a time of trouble - the portal

discoporated a fuck ton of demons

declared War on Hell

took charge and was a mediator between Heaven and Hell

and he did this all on his own (I really doubt he counts Maggie and Nina)

Aziraphale did exactly what Heaven had planned - what Gabriel was meant to sign off on - he started back up the plan he put on pause with Crowley - he made that first move

but also the 25 Lazarii miracle - which set off alarms in Heaven - and the Halo - which also set off alarms in Heaven. That’s twice in one week. One would imagine The Metatron would take notice.

EDIT

Let's switch gears a little and talk about why The Metatron mentions Gabriel coming to Aziraphale in their little talk

Whatever other reason Gabriel may have had for going to Aziraphale, giving him something etc., it was all done under a baseline understanding.

That Aziraphale would get it, be a safe space with an understanding that they don't want everything to end for some similar reasons (their demon partners) - and Aziraphale did help him despite not knowing this exact baseline

He helped the Supreme Archangel hide from Heaven and escape punishment - who’s to say he wouldn't help other angels?

The reason The Metatron doesn't care about Gabriel and Beelzebub running off together is because they went off

Their relationship doesn't have the same level of connection to Earth and humans as Aziraphale and Crowley - they didn't want Armageddon to happen because they wanted to keep seeing each other, the Earth part was optional - a matter of circumstance as it was the easiest place to keep seeing each other. Now that they were gone and together - his reason for objecting is practically void.

That is not the same as Aziraphale and Crowley

But also it works in the Metatron favor - Beelzebub is out of Hell. The Grand Duke of Hell just up and left the same time Heaven is getting their replacement Supreme Archangel - it's now time for Hell to be in shambles.

All while The Metatron just came to snipped away the bud - that seed of safety on Earth if another Angel decided to go against Heaven’s plan.

If he gets the angel that put a stop to Armageddon- that chose the Earth over Heaven - that protected his executioner just at the hint he was on the run from Heaven. If he brought that angel back to Heaven he would not be able to be that anymore, do those things anymore - not with being closely monitored anyway. Keep your enemy close and all that.

And he pulled out all the stops to achieve this - the clothes, the words, the coffee

End Edit

But The Metatron also still needs the Bookshop for some reason - a bookshop he left in the care of an angel he just encouraged to read

So he gets the best of both worlds - The rogue angel back under his thumb and an angel that will listen to him going through the bookshop

What does this all mean? What’s the point?

Well he’s an angel in dark, an angel in reverse

When we went over the tarot cards he’s been linked to, but especially the King of Cups, he seems to represent the reverse side of them while trying to maintain the upright version- which is interesting

He’s an angel in trouble, an angel who needs a scapegoat

The Archangel Metatron is a controversial angel, his existence, his story, his position of power. He even has a story under his name where he is punished and demoted by God when someone assumes him to be another God in Heaven

The Metatron as a character that likes to be surrounded by fours, covered on all sides. And each and every one of those angels has done something to get them in trouble - meaning he has dirt.

After all every scribe needs their soldiers - however backhanded it is

and maybe he has something big he is hiding of his own - using the others faults to hide his - something concerning the Book of Life - either him not having it or at least not having all of it

But anyway he has set himself up to be protected from any fallout - he has not been seen, only heard for centuries probably. Sending angels in his place to do jobs (yes, I’m talking about the change to Gabriel being the one at the airbase - I’m giving it a reason)

Until now - until he walked into that bookshop and made himself known. He put himself in play thinking he knows the game, thinking he just brought in the perfect angel to blame things on if they all go wrong(which they will)

but really he just opened himself up to the start of his downfall. Double edged sword and all that

For the next season I imagine he is going to keep up the pleasantries, take up that backseat role, act as a guide, being subtle in his manipulations - he after all believes he got away with it - just all those things until it all comes crumbling down and he gets exposed, and at the center of it all is Aziraphale (and then Aziraphale gets offered his position which he turns down, saying no to Heaven and choosing to be with Crowley) what? I said nothing.

(I think that’d be funny and this is a comedy after all)

It’s the Punishment of an Angel, the Fall of a King

————————————————————————

and that’s all folks - that’s the end- for now. Hope you’ve enjoyed -I had to watch the final 15 so many times and I’m totally ok

#good omens #good omens 2 #the metatron #metatron #aziraphale #crowley #good omens meta #good omens analysis #good omens character analysis #good omens theory #good omens metatron #maggie and nina

[pissylittlebirdboy]

Perhaps this delicious oatmilk latte with almond syrup from @pret-a-metatron might change your mind about killing me?

Though we've never met, we have somehow gotten off on the wrong foot. But I'm sure we can remedy that with chinwag over coffee, like civilized beings.

I can smell out drugs, you know. so if that is anything but coffee, you will be receiving a polite talons-to-the-face, in response.

Unfortunately, I am a sucker for sweets. I will be taking the coffee. I will not be taking your name off my enemy list. Try harder.

And don’t ever say ‘chinwag’ again. It makes you sound like more of a wrinkled old cunt than you already are.

#prince ulysses #theprinceulysses #u.f.d. #metatron hate club #kill the metatron #🦚🗡️🩸 #crownedcorrespondance

[theofficersacademy]

PROMPT 1. THE MASKS WE WEAR. . .

The magic is about to begin. Perhaps you will, this eve, make new acquaintances - or perhaps you might reacquaint yourselves with those you thought you knew.

Bring your true selves along for the night, and together forge unforgettable memories...!

Share some of the refreshments with a friend or stranger

[ Champagne ] - Imported from the western shores of the Adrestrian Empire, the school purchases 70 bottles of this stuff well in advanced for this day alone. The bartenders are under strict orders not to offer any student more than one glass.

[ Sparkling Water ] - Fresh spring water that has been magically carbonated. Served with a squeeze of lime or a dash of one of the many fruit syrups available at the bartender’s disposal. 

[ Coffee ] - More specifically, a mocha brewed with Almyran coffee beans and Dagdan chocolate and served with hot milk. A sweeter variation of the drink taking Fódlan by storm. 

[ Tea ] - Just what it says on the tin! The only teas offered are Mint, Bergamot, Sweet-Apple Blend, Albinean Berry Blend, and Southern Fruit Blend, wrapped in small tea bags. Clever students bring their own tea.

[ Water ] - The liquid of life, the quencher of thirst. Served in crystalline glasses. And what’s more dramatic than throwing water at someone’s face!

[ Spaghetti and Meatball ] - A classic that's here to stay: a lovers’ portion of freshly-made spaghetti cooked in the monastery’s famous tomato sauce. The titular, singular meatball sits in the center, waiting for one lucky person to have their lover roll it to them with their nose as an offering.

[ Sweet Bun Trio ] - A selection of traditional Faerghus pastries, all small enough to be eaten in one delicious bite! The first bun is filled with sweet cream and topped with icing and a candied cherry. The second is a sweet roll filled with almonds, pecans, and dried cranberries and glazed with honey. The third is a bun sliced in half, filled with almond paste and whipped cream, dusted with powdered sugar on top.

[ Pomegranate ] - A newcomer to the Ethereal Ball’s menu, a simple bowl of pomegranate seeds. No one in the staff is quite sure how these are supposed to be served, only that you better not spit the pits out on the floor!

[ Mint Candy ] - For when your breath isn’t as fresh as newly-fallen snow.

[ Fake Mint Candy ] - For when you'd like for a certain someone's breath to be less than fresh as newly-fallen snow, but would still like to plead innocent after the damage is done.

With the Stars' Blessings

[ Goddess Tower ] - Who says you have to wait until the end of the night to see whether or not the myths are true? Love (and/or rejection) waits for no one!

[ Garden ] - Need to get away from the thick of the party for a moment? Step outside of the dance hall, where Garreg Mach's own vaunted gardens await, gracefully decorated to take on new life for the duration of the evening.

[ Fashion Police ] - What in the world is that person wearing, and are you fit to be judging them for it? Or are you instead the culprit in question?

[ Gossip ] - Sure, the majority of attendees tonight have donned masks, but that doesn't mean you can't have a delightful little chat about them all the same.

[ Cue the Music ] - Dancing's what tonight's all about, is it not? Grab a friend or a stranger and get to twirling (or whatever it is the kids call it nowadays).

#toaball2024 #do not reblog

[life-o-n-m4rs]

An Analysis on the Finale and Aziraphale’s Inner Monologue (Michael Sheen is an Incredible Actor)

Like most Good Omens fans in these tragic, triyng times, I’ve spent hours scrolling through Twitter, Instagram, and Tumblr reading hundreds of people’s thoughts and opinions on the season, particularly the final scene of the season in which Aziraphale is offered to return to Heaven to be Supreme Archangel and Crowley confesses his love to Aziraphale after literal millennia of pining. After my most recent rewatch of the season, I spent a lot of time focussing on the final scene(s) and carefully eyeing every tiny detail. Not necessarily around the coffee, but around everything that came after it. I am somewhat on the fence about the coffee theory. Though I don’t think that Aziraphale decided to go back to Heaven entirely on his own fruition, I don’t think he was completely under the control of Heaven either. His ultimate decision was not entirely out of character.

Starting with the coffee and scene with Metatron itself: many people have theorized that The Metatron poisoned Aziraphale with cyanide, which I see the logic in. We saw earlier in the series in the second minisode that poison causes demons–and presumably angels–to act very strange, like they’re high or drunk. When he drank the laudnum, Crowley stops a girl from killing herself, while stating that it was not a kind thing to do as he was “Off [his] rocker on laudnum. Not responsible for [his] actions”. However, Crowley still drinks the laudnum to stop Elspeth from doing it herself, so obviously he was at least somewhat in his right mind. He still aimed to thwart her attempt, so his statement deflecting his actions due to his intoxication could just be another moment of Crowley denying any goodness in him, much like when he saves Aziraphale’s books and tells him not to thank him. So, coming back to the coffee, it is perhaps plausible that Aziraphale said yes to The Metatron because he was not entirely in his right mind. When we see Metatron order the coffee, he does ask for a “dash of almond syrup”, but when giving it to Aziraphale, says that there is a “hefty jigger” of it. That certainly doesn’t sound like a dash. Where the coffee theory starts to fall off, however, is immediately after Aziraphale drinks the coffee. When Crowley drank the laudnum, he immediately felt the effects of the poison, whereas with Aziraphale, we see that he is completely the same afterwards. Of course, cyanide is not laudnum, and it was also, theoretically, mixed in with coffee, so the effects could very well be different. Aziraphale returns to his shop with no coffee in hand, so it is safe to assume that he finished it, and we don’t see any changes in behavior until he starts talking to Crowley. That is when he starts to act off.

If we look at Aziraphale during his conversation with The Metatron, he immediately declines his offer. He flatout says that he does not want to go back to heaven. Not only that, but Metatron tells Aziraphale that he chose him to replace Gabriel as Supreme Archangel because he’s a great, natural leader. That he’s honest and doesn’t just tell people what they want to hear, which is just flatout not true. We see Aziraphale lie so many times in the show, probably more than Crowley, and he especially lies to Heaven on multiple occasions. That’s a huge focus of the minisode in episode 2, that Aziraphale lied to Heaven. He has never aligned with Heaven’s beliefs. He is notoriously insuboordinate. He is by far not the best choice to be Supreme Archangel, especially since he hasn’t properly aligned himself with Heaven, or even spoken to them, in years. This is the first piece of manipulation from The Metatron’s part. Not even necessarily some miracle or poisoning, but he was feeding Azirphale what he wants to hear. He’s praising him to get in his good graces, but that’s only the first half. Aziraphale still says no. It’s not until Metatron presents his second half of the offer that we see something start to crack in Aziraphale. If The Metatron did do something to Aziraphale, it still could not have worked without this vital piece. He offers to let Aziraphale, as Supreme Archangel, restore Crowley as an angel. Crowley can come with. Suddenly things are different, and we see it on Aziraphale’s face. Michael Sheen is an inredible actor and he manages to narrate a deep and painful inner monologue within Aziraphale with just his face. The second The Metatron starts to say that he could bring Crowley with him, his expression changes very subtly, but just enough for us to see that something made its way through to him.

We are deliberately not shown the rest of their conversation. There is clearly something there that we did not see. The only other part of their conversation we see is at the end of it. The Metatron says that Azirphale “[doesn’t] have to answer immediately. Take all the time you need”. All that Azirpahle says in response is that he doesn’t know what to say, to which The Metatron says, “Go tell your friend the good news”, as if he knows that, in the end, Aziraphale will come with him. We watch Aziraphale walk away, and he does not look like he has good news for Crowley. He looks scared.

Something inside of Aziraphale is battling itself in this moment. We see no change in his demeanor until we reenters his bookshop, and even then, it’s not until right before Crowley begins speaking. We see him looking at Crowley and something almost seems to waft over him. He’s no longer scared or nervous about this news. He suddenly wants to tell Crowley all about it.

When Aziraphale cuts Crowley off, he’s suddenly ecstatic about going back to Heaven, which does not at all match how he was feeling less than one minute ago on his way back to the bookshop. So, it might be entirely possible that The Metatron didn’t do anything to Aziraphale until after their conversation. That he performed some miracle on him just as he was walking away. As Aziraphale explains the ordeal to Crowley, he is filled more and more with joy and excitement about all of it. Aziraphale, who, just a few minutes ago, said that he didn’t want to go back to Heaven. I do believe that part of him here is thinking back on when he knew Crowley as an angel. We don’t know much about Crowley’s time as an angel, but we do know that he was an important angel. Important enough to be second to the Supreme Archangel as Aziraphale proposes. We saw a small moment of Crowley when he was an angel and how much he loved building the universe. Creating stars. Countless galaxies that were like his children. But we know very well why Crowley could never go back. So why doesn’t Aziraphale? Aziraphale doesn’t exactly have the best relationship with Heaven. They were the ones who tried to destroy him, to hurt Crowley, to destroy the world and humanity, which Azirphale stopped. Why should we believe that he’s even been forgiven for that? Crowley seems to share the same sentiment that the viewers do–why should Aziraphale go back after what they did to him?–because he immediately assumes that Aziraphale turned down the offer.

Crowley tells Aziraphale that they’re better than that. That they don’t need Heaven. That when Hell offered him a promotion, he said no, without hesitation. Aziraphale rebutes with “Obviously you said no to Hell, you’re the bad guys.” You’re. When has Aziraphale ever aligned Crowley with Hell like that? Especially in the last few years of their relationship. They have been completely cut off from both sides for years. This is the first instance of something slipping through that isn’t entirely Aziraphale. This is not something that he would say to Crowley. Aziraphale says, “...Heaven. It’s the side of light, of truth. Of good.” He has spent all of both seasons of the show whole-heartedly believing that Crowley was good. He has always seen him as such. So, for him to not only include Crowley in the Hell collective, but to imply that Crowley cannot be good without Heaven, is a clear sign that something is wrong. Crowley is begging, pleading that Azirphale said no to Metatron. If we look back, he never gave an answer. The Metatron told him that he could take all the time he needed to answer. But Aziraphale has his answer. He never had a choice in giving one, did he? Aziraphale did say no and The Metatron didn’t take it.

At this point, Crowley can feel Aziraphale slipping away, so he goes on with his confession anyway. It’s clear in his voice that he’s now desperately trying to hold onto Aziraphale. Throughout Crowley’s confession, he plays a tug-of-war with Heaven for Aziraphale. He brings up Gabriel and Beelzebub, saying that if they “can go off together, then we can”. He’s not just bringing them up as a point in his argument to say that it is possible for an angel and a demon to love each other. He’s bringing them up because Beelzebub says flatout that they “found something that mattered more than choosing sides”. Crowley is trying to present himself as that for Aziraphale in that moment. He’s looking him in the eye, allowing himself to be vulnerable, and begging him to forget about sides. What about shades of gray?

Crowley is presenting Aziraphale with an offer. An offer for the two of them to forget Heaven and Hell, to forget everything but each other. But Aziraphale has his mind set, either by himself or by someone else, but it is set nonetheless. Even as he fights whatever is inside of him, pulling him toward Heaven, he’ll be damned if he doesn’t do everything in his power to pull Crowley with him because he cannot bear to be apart from him. Crowley would burn Heaven to the ground for Aziraphale, but he’s afraid of fire.

The best comparison for Aziraphale’s willingness to go back to Heaven, which many people have used, is that of an abuse victim. He has suffered at the hands of Heaven for millennia, but when the expectation is that he must feel worthless, he holds on so tight to any speck of praise like it is high above the standard. When Crowley presents his offer to Aziraphale, he’s not turning it down. He is trying to fulfill it while also getting to enact his hopes for Heaven. He says to Crowley, “Come with me. To Heaven. I’ll run it, you can be my second in command”. This line always stuck out to me. Second in command. When has Crowley ever been a second to Aziraphale? Throughout the series, we see them walking together, always shoulder to shoulder. Neither ever walks behind or in front of the other. They have always been equals. Now, suddenly, Crowley is no longer worthy of being Aziraphale’s equal. Almost as though Heaven is looking at Crowley and saying that he doesn’t deserve to be on the same level as a measly principality. Someone who was once important enough to build galaxies can never be on the same level again because he has fallen. The Metatron is starting to flood into Aziraphale’s head, and Aziraphale is fighting to stay afloat, reaching out for Crowley to pull him out, but if Crowley takes his hand he’ll just get pulled under, too.

“You can’t leave this bookshop,” Crowley says. You can’t leave me. Is what he means. “Oh, Crowley,” Aziraphale patronizingly coos at him. He thinks that Crowley is refusing because of foolish attachments to material objects, something that Heaven has no time or use for. Something Heaven has no patience for. “Nothing lasts forever.” We won’t last forever. Crowley is offering Aziraphale eternity, and Aziraphale is laughing at him for it. At least, from Crowley’s perspective. Through his heartbreak, he can’t see that Aziraphale so badly wants to go with him, but something is holding him down, so he asks Crowley to come to him. There is no halfway point. “No, I don’t suppose it does.” Crowley puts his glasses on while he’s alone with Aziraphale for the first time in years. He spent years carefully tearing down his walls for him, and it’s as if, in an instant, someone came along and pressed undo. All the bricks came magneting back together and built themselves back up. Crowley opened himself up, truly, for the first time ever, and he thinks he’s being rejected becaus Aziraphale doesn’t know how to tell him how beautiful he looks. As Crowley walks away, Aziraphale doesn’t know what he did wrong. Why is Crowley leaving? He’s offering him what is, in his mind, the best possible outcome. He wants to fix Heaven for Crowley. He wants him to be that sweet, happy, angel he was, but Aziraphale’s too naive to see that he never can be. He’s begging Crowley to come with him now. “We can be together,” he says, almost like it’s a compromise. He still doesn’t know how to let himself love Crowley, but he’s willing to let Crowley love him if that means he will stay. He says that they can be angels, doing good, again implying that Crowley cannot be good without Heaven. Crowley cannot be good with Aziraphale. But the fact of the matter is, he may be good without Aziraphale, but he isn’t Crowley. More and more of Aziraphale breaks through in this moment. In his moment of desperation not to lose Crowley, he’s forgetting about Heaven. All he needs is Crowley. He needs him. And when that plead doesn’t work, Heaven surfaces again. He turns to anger. “I don’t think you understand what I’m offering you.” He’s now bringing Crowley down. He’s using the same tactics that Heaven does. Make them feel worthless so that they love you when you give them anything more. But this is also Heaven trying to push Crowley away from Aziraphale. The intention never was for Crowley to be an angel. Metatron knew very well that Crowley would say no. He just needed that option to get in. To break into Aziraphale’s mind, tear the two apart with no hope of mending, and keep them as far away from each other as possible.

Aziraphale gives up trying to hold onto Crowley. Heaven is in his head and in his ear saying, “Give up. He’s not coming.” Heaven has built itself back up in Aziraphale’s head. He has closed himself from Crowley. It’s not until Crowley kisses him that the battle begins again between Aziraphale and whatever The Metatron placed in him, whether literally or emotionally. We see on Aziraphale’s face and in his body language a flicker between wanting and hating it. But he never pulls away. When Crowley let’s go, Aziraphale looks horrified. Like he can’t believe that Crowley just did that, or that he allowed it to continue as long as it did. Deep down, there’s nothing Aziraphale wanted more, but not like this. As he struggles to find his words, his face is first sad. Afraid. He mouths something through an exhale that appears to be what wants to be an “I love you”, but his face shifts. Heaven takes over again and all he can say is “I forgive you”. He goes from sad and lovelorn to a sort of anger with Crowley. We see him flash back and forth between these two many times throughout this sequence.

As Crowley walks away, Aziraphale comes through again, wanting to go after him. He even appears to mouth “No”. He wants him to stay. He wants to stay with him. But then he looks after him with a furrowed brow. He’d better walk away. It’s better for everyone.

He pushes Heaven back again when he presses his fingers to his lips. He wants to remember what that felt like. He wants to feel it again. Desperately. But he changes again and wipes the kiss away. It’s not what Heaven would want, and so neither shall he, for this love is a sin, and angels do not sin.

When the Metatron returns and Aziraphale tells him he didn’t take it well, The Metatron immediately puts Crowley down, saying that he was “always asking damn fool questions”. Now that Crowley was out of sight, he needed to be out of mind as well. He did not align with Heaven or its goals, so Aziraphale cannot think even remotely fondly of him. He must be an angel again, and angels do not look upon demons with an ounce of kindness. Crowley does not deserve Aziraphale’s kindness. He offered him something great, and he was too foolish to accept it. Right?

The Metatron asks Aziraphale if he’s ready to start. Aziraphale never gave him an answer, though, did he? Because there was no answer to give. Aziraphale never had a choice. Crowley had to be gone, and Aziraphale had to be the one to push him away, because how else would they regain control over the both of them? The reality of it has suddenly hit Aziraphale. He’s still fighting Heaven’s control. Suddenly, he can’t leave the bookshop. Suddenly, it must last forever, because this is Crowley’s shop, too. While The Metatron is trying to get Aziraphale out of the shop, he keeps looking at the chairs. The chairs in which he and Crowley sat and drank so many times. Where they laughed together. Where they decided to stop armageddon. The chairs where they decided that their side was the only one that mattered. Aziraphale is doubting. He almost tells The Metatron that he wants to stay. He almost tells him no. But he can’t, because The Metatron won’t let him. He can’t.

In the scene just before Aziraphale gets on the elevator, the music is a key factor. It tells the viewer exactly what’s going on in Aziraphale’s mind. He is still flipping between Heavn and Crowley. Every time Aziraphale leans toward Heaven, the music plays in a major key, with more emphasis on the flute. When his mind goes to Crowley, the strings take over with a melancholy melody. Strings that pull Aziraphale down, back to the world, to Crowley. And then he takes that final breath and steps onto the elevator. The flute takes over again and the music changes to a hopeful melody, but still sad enough sounding, especially when we cut back to Crowley getting into his car. We see one final look of doubt on Azirphale’s face as the elevator doors close. The weight of his choices are hitting him. But he doens’t dwell on them long because he’s finally let go of the ledge. He’s stopped trying to float. He’s sinking down into the black waters of Heaven and his mind has vanished. He’s under the Metatron’s control now. We see him struggling and fighting one final time during the credits until finally, just before both he and Crowley are completely gone, he cracks an unsettling grin. The last ties to Earth have been severed. His uncanny expressions throughout the entire credit sequence are meant to be unnerving. Something is deeply, deeply, wrong.

So, I don’t think I necessarily believe in the coffee theory exactly, though I do think that it is important. There was so much cinematic emphasis placed on the coffee, but whether that be because The Metatron meddled with it or just as a red herring to raise unease from the viewer with The Metatron is uncertain. The only person who knows is Neil Gaiman and we all know just how much we’d get out of him if we asked. Ultimately, if Crowley coming to Heaven was never presented as an option in the first place, Aziraphale would not have gone. But he leaves with blame placed on Crowley, and that’s exactly how The Metatron wanted it.

#this took me 3 hours to write oml #good omens #crowley #azirphale #ineffable husbands #essay #analysis essay #good omens analysis #neil gaiman #every #david tennant #michael sheen #fan fiction #good omens fan fiction #can you tell that i like analyzing characters #this hurt so much to write and rewatch that scene #coffee theory

[mariacallous]

Honey cake is a hallmark of Rosh Hashanah and the fall Jewish holidays  — Ashkenazic honey cake, that is. But did you know there’s a Sephardic cake traditionally served for Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur break fast and during Sukkot? Like its Eastern European counterpart, tishpishti symbolizes wishes for a sweet new year and the fullness of life. The cake is also popular for Purim and adapted for Passover.

Semolina pastries and puddings have been made for centuries throughout the Mediterranean, North Africa and the Middle East. Tishpishti is traditionally made with fine semolina and soaked in a sweet syrup of sugar, honey or a mixture, but beyond these common elements, there are many variations in both the way tishpishti is made — such as nuts or no nuts, eggs or no eggs, flavored with lemon, orange or rose water — and even what it’s called according to different geographic and cultural roots. For example, in Egypt, it’s basboosah or baboussa, namora or namoura in Syria and shamali in Crete.

Tishpishti is perhaps the name most used and, as we know it today, the cake originated in Turkey. In the “Encyclopedia of Jewish Food,” Gil Marks explains that in Israel and for Jews from once-Ottoman Turkey, Greece and the Balkans, the name is probably a nonsense name from the Turkish “tez” (fast/quick) and “pişti” (plane/slope). Put together, it means “quickly done.” In Ladino it might also be called pispiti, tupishti and revani, which Joyce Goldstein in “Sephardic Flavors: Jewish Cooking of the Mediterranean” notes is named after a 16th century Turkish poet “who wrote about the delights of food.” 

Many tishpishti recipes use eggs, including ones that instruct you to whip the whites separate from the yolks, a Sephardic contribution to tishpishti. This recipe, however, is based on a very old traditional way of making cakes from a thick dough without eggs. My concession to modernity is adding baking powder and soda, both 19th century products, to lessen the density of the cake. Using ground almonds instead of walnuts will result in a lighter colored cake, which is traditional at Rosh Hashanah to symbolize a bright new year. Tishpishti is delicious on its own or served with a spoonful of yogurt, labneh or whipped cream and a cup of mint tea or strong Turkish coffee.

Notes:

It is best to make the syrup ahead of time so it has time to cool, although you can choose to make it while the cake bakes, then refrigerate it to cool more quickly. 

Tishpishti is best when left at room temperature for several hours or overnight so the syrup penetrates the cake. 

Store wrapped at room temperature for two days or a week in the refrigerator. The cake can be well-wrapped and frozen for two months. Defrost and then refresh with some drizzles of warm syrup. 

[theflashiestbastard]

Have seen a few people wondering why the angels didn’t recognise the Metatron in human form but Crowley did and I have a theory!

Perhaps the Metatron has literally never been to Earth before (at the very least, not that the angels know of). We haven’t even actually seen him “in person” in Heaven either on the show, only as a giant floating head.

So if the angels have thousands of years of precedent, knowing that the Metatron doesn’t use a corporeal form, then the idea that this guy walking into the bookshop could be the Metatron might just roll down their backs like water off a… something or other. Crowley, on the other hand, doesn’t have this context and is thus much better positioned to recognise the face he saw a few minutes ago.

This would also make the Metatron’s trip down to Earth a Very Big Deal, which frames the way he makes his offer to Aziraphale in a different light. Gabriel might pop down to get in a light jog and talk strategy with an agent, but the Metatron’s visit is NOT casual or even really conceivable.

I think this lends extra credence to a theory I’ve seen floating around and can 100% get behind: something is UP with that coffee. The Metatron could have told Aziraphale about his offer as a floating head, but could not have given him a coffee.

The Pushing Daisies fans in the room will note that almond flavoured coffee cream creamer (or syrup, as the case may be) is suspicious because cyanide tastes like almonds. We saw earlier in the season how human poisons are behaviour-altering drugs for demons, and by extension it would follow that they’re similar for angels. And a lot of emphasis was put on the coffee. There was a whole scene where he bought the coffee, and the dialogue made a connection between coffee and death. The fact that it has almond flavor was mentioned twice. The Metatron made absolutely sure that Aziraphale actually drank the coffee. This is what the film nerds call “Chekhov’s Coffee.”

A drug in the coffee could help the Metatron dig into Aziraphale’s pre-existing tendency to want heaven to be good, despite all the evidence to the contrary. And the Metatron needs that ace in the hole because clearly when the ineffable husbands work together, they are wielding some serious power!

Very interested to see how this all plays out in season 3! (Please please PLEASE let us get a season 3 🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀)

#good omens #aziraphale #crowley #the metatron #metatron #good omens 2 #good omens meta #good omens theory

[inconveniently-discorporated]

What do you think about the theory that it isn’t the real Aziraphale in the last scene of season 2?

Personally, I think it’s true because there was a miracle sound when the metatron handed him the coffee, he was really out of character, and Michael Sheen had a weird expression during the credits that Aziraphale’s never had before (kinda reminded me of the face swapping thing in season 1)

First of all, thank you so much for the ask! It's a very interesting question that has brought up a few different things I've been thinking about, so I hope I'm not giving you more than you bargained for back.

I actually haven't heard that theory yet. Personally, I'm not sure how much I like that theory -- the whole speech by Crowley and the kiss I feel like would be way less emotionally impactful if it was someone else in his place. And I feel like Aziraphale responded to those things pretty consistently with his character, as an angel who is resolved in doing what he thinks is the right thing.

I do think something is up with the coffee. However, I didn't hear the miracle sound as the Metatron was handing the coffee over. I think the miracle sound was right before he approached Aziraphale with the coffee, and I believe that was indicating that Michael, Uriel, and Saraqael had vanished back to Heaven.

But what I do find suspicious about the coffee is that he asks for "a dash of almond syrup" and then tells Aziraphale it's a "hefty jigger of almond syrup". There was A LOT of emphasis not only placed on him bringing the coffee, but what KIND of coffee it was, and I can't think of any reason for that. Earthly pleasures in general are special to Aziraphale, but we never ever see him drink or order coffee or anything that would make that particular order significant for it so be called out twice.

And I wasn't much of a fan of the "Aziraphale was drugged" theory, but it honestly does make sense as an explanation for why they focused so much on that coffee. And they also focus so much on the Laudanum in episode 4 -- specifically zooming in on the label -- and its effects on Crowley (immediately making him act silly and brash). And mentioning almonds is a pretty well-known clue that a character's food or drink has been spiked with cyanide.

And I do think Aziraphale was really... exciteable... when he came back to the shop. He was breathless, it seemed like his head was spinning, and I chalked it up to the excitement of the idea of getting to change Heaven to be what he thought it should be, AND getting to reinstate Crowley as an angel. Which I do think are in line with what he wants deep down, and therefore not ENTIRELY out of character for him. But I also do think... He would have to know that's not what Crowley would want? We could all see Crowley's reaction coming a mile away. But I think he very rapidly talked himself into believing that if he just explained it to Crowley, Crowley would agree and they would all be happy and seraphic in a new and improved Heaven!

So, in short, I think my answer is -- I do believe it is the real Aziraphale. I don't know where I stand on the coffee thing, but I could easily see that perhaps he has been intoxicated against his will, not to the point that I think he's totally brainwashed, but to the point where he's not entirely thinking straight and allowing his deepest desires to overrule his logical thinking.

And I do agree Aziraphale looks really unhinged on the lift Up. To me, I think he's in a whirlwind of many intense feelings in that shot. He's just broken up with the love of his eternity, after their first emotionally-tumultuous kiss. I think his expressions keep bouncing between "what the actual fuck have I done" and "no, you know what, I CAN do that, and I will SHOW that demon that I'm RIGHT".

#good omens #gos2 spoilers #thank you for the ask! #it will be extremely interesting to see what happens next

[the-metatron]

you're mean >:{ i don't like you

-.....to tag with who this is or not.......... fuck it. @eden-the-vampire

Perhaps this delicious oatmilk latte with almond syrup might change your mind?

#the metatron answers #pret a metatron #a large oatmilk latte #with a hefty jigger of almond syrup #the voice of god speaks #enoch speaks

[theniceandaccurategoodomensblog]

Why an oat milk latte with a hefty jigger of almond syrup?

One theory is that the coffee was poisoned and the almond was to cover the poison, but if it wasn’t (or even if it was) — what’s the symbolism? Why that particular drink?

The Metatron uses the coffee to gain Aziraphale’s trust and to manipulate him. Here’s that thing you love and yes I’ve ingested too it is all fine.

But why coffee? It isn’t the first drink we’d associate with Aziraphale. It is unlikely to be one of his favourites. So why bring a coffee and not say a tea or a cocoa or a bottle of wine all of which we do see Aziraphale consume and know he loves? Is it to show that the Metatron knows Aziraphale well enough to manipulate him with food/drink but still doesn’t know him well enough to offer the food/drink he really wants (only Crowley does that)?

But then, why not just an ordinary latte? What’s with the oats and the almonds?

In Judaism almond trees are symbolic for the watchfulness of God and the Hebrew word for watching sounds like the word for almond tree. In fact the Menorah is shaped like an almond blossom.

This is referenced in:

Jeremiah 1:11-12 NIV

The word of the LORD came to me: “What do you see, Jeremiah?” “I see the branch of an almond tree,” I replied. The LORD said to me, “You have seen correctly, for I am watching to see that my word is fulfilled.”

So perhaps the symbolism of the almonds is that God and the Metatron are still watching. Aziraphale has been given a hefty jigger of “God and I are watching you”.

The oats is less clear to me. Is it a reference to life and death? To harvesting as in harvesting human souls and Armageddon?

#good omens meta #good omens season two #good omens season 2 #Aziraphale #the coffee #the latte #almonds #oats #symbolism #Metatron #my meta

[gemsofgreece]

Hello! I hope you’re well 🌻 I have a question. I would dearly love to visit Greece someday, but unfortunately I have a lot of food sensitivities (to gluten, dairy, and nuts) and I was wondering, if I was in a big city like Athens, how possible it would be to find accommodations for those sensitivities? Maybe? Not at all?

Thank you so much!

🌼 Hello! 🌼

No need to worry, you won’t have a problem in Athens! I believe you wouldn’t need to worry much in any of the 5 - 7 largest cities in Greece and the 3-5 most cosmopolitan islands.

🍧The nuts are the easiest one to avoid as the overwhelming majority of savoury Greek food doesn’t include nuts. However, nuts are an integral part in traditional Greek pastry making and there unfortunately you will have to keep your distances. However, you will find places in the big cities with gluten free and vegan pastries, even if they are not the most traditional options. BUT!!! There is also the literally most traditional Greek sweets that are both gluten free and dairy free: spoon sweets, usually made of dried fruits and syrup!!! Just make sure to choose one without nuts, there are many flavours!

Tomato, fig and apricot spoon sweets. There are many many more varieties! You will find them in traditional spoon sweet, herb and spice shops, some pastry shops, perhaps upscale hotels, upscale traditional cafes. The most classic varieties could be found in some supermarkets too.

👩‍🍳 When it comes to savoury food, things are much easier. With a search in Tripadvisor for Athens with the sensitivity filters, the site gives me 1347 results back. Here’s the link to the search. So you are not going to have a problem. You can also search for “best dairy free gluten free places in Athens”, there are some articles with guides and tips. Many medium and upscale restaurants also write in their menus that they have suitable dishes or that they are open to discuss your sensitivities and modify your dish accordingly.

🏨 If you intend to stay in a hotel and eat breakfast and / or dinner there, check their amenities / services on their website first, it might be mentioned there. If not sure, I believe you should discuss it first with the hotel via a call or an email to be sure before making the reservation. I believe several medium and more upscale hotels (4 and 5 stars) will take into consideration food sensitivities.

☕️ As for coffee shops, in the big cities many nowadays have dairy substitutes such as oat and almond milk. I believe rice milk is rarer, so if those bother you, keep in mind to check what the substitute milk is.

🏪 In the big supermarkets you will have no problem finding dairy substitutes (ie vegan or lactose free milk and cheese) . Gluten free pasta are easily available too. Gluten free is a little more challenging when it comes to snacks. Brands like Papadopoulos and VIOLANTA offer a few gluten-free snacks. Just keep in mind that we really love nuts in our snacks and candies and you have to double check every snack you see for potential warnings, because a lot do not have milk or nuts but are produced in the same industrial machines as milk and nut products which means they might be contaminated. Avoid mini-markets for snacks and substitutes.

🌯 Another tricky area is fast food. Our fast food is usually pies and pitas and you won’t be able to find gluten free options very easily. Obviously however you can get a portion of souvlaki or gyros without wrapping it in a pita or a bread so there’s that! Combine it with tomatoes, onions, ketchup, lettuce, potatoes and you are more than fine! But in order to try wrapped fast food, you will definitely have to check such guides for specialised restaurants I mentioned above.

Now the good news: aside from the snacks and fast food, the traditional Greek cuisine is based on the Mediterranean diet in which gluten ingredients are naturally limited.

🥗 Traditional Greek food revolves around meat, veggies, fish, seafood and beans. (And dairy but dairy can be more easily avoided.) This means that even if you are in any place in Greece, less modern and fancy, you will still be able to eat from a variety of dishes. Check the menu for the ingredients on the dishes and discuss with the waiter if you have questions and you can avoid the problems even in a pretty traditional place.

Below are some very traditional meals dairy and gluten free that can be found in low-key non specialising places:

Grilled or boiled vinegar octopus

Wild greens salad:

Yemistá (tomatoes and peppers stuffed with rice and sometimes minced meat - do double check that they haven’t put nuts in)

Agurodomata salad (essentially the Greek village salad but without the feta cheese, you can also ask it as a Horiatiki / Greek salad without the feta)

Spanakórizo (spinach rice)

Gígantes (Giant beans)

Many other delicacies in tsipouradika (seafood shops) and mezedopolía (appetizer shops) and of course all the dishes that involve meat and fish, particularly grilled, which are literally the most common. But beware of deep fried ones, in case they coat them in egg or wheat. I also don’t know if you have any limitations with spices and herbs, this is something you should keep in mind.

I also found a Greek gluten free restaurant card in case you stumble onto a restaurant where they don’t know good English (extremely unlikely in Athens, unlikely elsewhere as well)

Heck I don’t know why it put that red corrector on the image wtf. Anyway I have myself underlined with the thick red line the words αυγά (eggs), γαλακτοκομικά (dairy) and ομελέτα (omelette). The card is exclusively for gluten free, it says what you can’t eat and then goes on with what you can eat. This is why I underlined eggs and dairy, so that you can see which words they are and blur them if you print the clear copy. It proceeds with asking that in case the cook can’t adjust any dish from the menu, then whether they can prepare a simple dish with an omelette (I underlined it) or meat. (Of course if you can eat eggs, you don’t have to scratch it out, that’s why I underlined them to show you the words and gave you a clear copy as well.)

I found cards and apps for dairy and nuts in Greek but they were behind a paywall 😑

Anyway that’s all from me: as a summary, there are several options in Athens and you will surely be able to get by in other large cities and the top cosmopolitan islands. The truth is that this may affect a little the prices but Greece is overall cheaper than west Europe and the cosmopolitan regions in the US, so upscale and specialised shops in Greece will be like medium shops in those other places price-wise. (Note: Not true for Mykonos and Santorini islands) What you should be a little more cautious with is pastries and snacks.

Hope this helped a little! I wish you a carefree and delicious stay in Athens when you come ❤️

* If any of my Greek followers has personal recs of cool places for the Anon, please comment!!!

#greece #Greek cuisine #food intolerance #food allergy #gluten free #dairy free #nut allergy #guide #Greek food #Athens #tourist guide #anon #ask #Greek facts

[helium-rambles]

Coffee Perfumes

Ever since I got into perfume, I have dreamed about smelling like black coffee. Not to spoil the review, but that dream has not come true. Nonetheless, here's all the fragrances I've tried that I've been told smell like black coffee (in alphabetical order by brand)

Alkemia's Caffaeum (five year aged black amber, Arabian coffee, labdanum, benzoin) This smells very perfume-y to me. If I smelt this on someone else, I would think it was a mainstream spray instead of an indie oil. It doesn't trigger migraines for me, but it's still not pleasant. Vaguely cough-syrup like. Other reviewers have said this scent is mostly amber, and amber rarely agrees with me, so that's probably why I don't like it. I understand in a vague way where this might smell like coffee. There's a richness to it that imitates coffee, but it doesn't work for me.

Bath Sabbath's Cupajoe (Freshly brewed coffee with hints of vanilla and cream) This one is nutty. If you drink primarily nutty coffee, this will probably smell like coffee to you. The vanilla adds some sweetness, but not enough to completely distract from the "coffee" scent. Alas, this doesn't work as a coffee scent to me, but I get where some people interpret coffee.

Haus of Gloi's Coffee Haus (coffee, chocolate, caramel, almond) People rave about this being the ideal black coffee scent. "You can't even smell the chocolate and other notes" they say. I think the people who say this have never smelt coffee before. This is straight up chocolate. Like, it's semi-sweet chocolate so I think people are tricked into thinking it's coffee by the fact that it's darker than milk chocolate. But as a lover of coffee and dark chocolate, I'm not buying it.

(Special note!!! After everyone in my household had thoroughly denounced this perfume as pure chocolate, we received a free sample of Frederick's brand cold coffee. We were convinced it was a mocha that they forgot to put the coffee into, but the ingredients list only coffee beans and water so....if you drink Frederick's brand coffee, I guess Coffee Haus does smell like coffee?!?! Still, I cannot in good faith recommend this as a coffee scent.)

Osmofolia's Cold Brew (ice, coffee beans, espresso) My reaction to this can be summed up as: What the fuck. People swear this smells like straight coffee and I would like to know what drugs they are on. This is floral and fruity, with maybe a hint of musk. It's a pretty nice actually, just not what I wanted at all. I thought maybe I was just having a weird reaction to this perfume because it is SO FAR OFF from coffee. Then my housemate tried it and also was like, "Oh, this is a nice fruity-floral scent. What's in it :) ... COfFEE?!?!?!?!?" So I thought perhaps they scent me the wrong sample. However, after trying another one of their perfumes with coffee as a side note, I'm pretty sure it's just this house's coffee.

Poesie's Whisper Your Bitter Things (coffee beans, clove, cinnamon, jasmine, neroli, vanilla bean) Okay, I can't give a good review of this perfume, because I seem to be anosmic to most of Poesie's notes. This smells like nothing for the first 20 minutes, then suddenly hits you with a blast of citrusy florals. My housemate can smell it from the beginning, but still smells no coffee. They do get the spices and florals, though. So, depending on whether you can smell this or not, it may or may not smell like black coffee. Who knows.

Possets Hophead (coffee and five ambers) This is fruity amber. No coffee, but like Caffaeum, I get where people can mistake the richness of amber into a coffee scent. It's basically the same scent as Caffaeum without the off-putting perfumey-ness.

Red River Apothecary's Raktajino (roasted espresso and sweet marshmallow fluff) You have no idea how sad I am this didn't work for me. Not only was it the last on my list to try, but it being named after a Star Trek drink made my inner nerd very happy. Alas, that marshmallow is soooo sweet. I do get the coffee underneath. It's nutty coffee, similar to Cupajoe, but deeper. I would possibly accept this as a coffee scent if it weren't for that dreadful marshmallow :(

Samar's Buzzworthy (Espresso, dark cocoa, vanilla cream, hazelnut) I get a powdery-chocolate from this. It reminds me of this coffee-scented chapstick one of my friends had in high school. Needless to say, that chapstick did not smell like coffee. My housemate gets an overwhelming amount of powdery vanilla. It's very reminiscent of marshmallows to them.

In conclusion: I will not be smelling like coffee any time soon :(

#perfume rambles #coffee #i will probably post another review of all the coffee scent i have that *weren't* advertised to me as black coffee #there is no coffee in them either #i am very tempted to get into perfumery just so i can make a good black coffee scent

[h0e-ratio]

Just another coffee theory post

When the Metatron orders the coffee he asks for a dash of almond syrup, which implies a small about, but when he hands it over he says it has a hefty jigger of it… idk seems a little sus, like perhaps something else that might sweeten up a drink was slipped it 👀

#go s2 spoilers #good omens season 2 spoilers #good omens spoilers #good omens

[tari-makes-drinks]

Hey! Do you have any recs for a strawberry gin? I've mostly been drinking it with either fizzy cranberry juice, or cranberry-flavored fizzy water, but would love to try some other things. This gin kicks serious ass and I want to appreciate it in as many ways as possible. Cheers!

I don't think I can really play around with it without tasting it, but I can at least give you a few jumping-off points. In order of complexity:

Gin likes bitter and (from your use of cranberry) I think so do you. Fever Tree produces a pretty good elderflower tonic water that I think could complement the strawberry. A Negroni (gin, sweet vermouth, campari) might work, but I worry that the campari would overpower the strawberry. Both strawberry and gin are fans of lime juice. A gin gimlet or gin highball might be up your alley. I bet strawberry gin could be a good base for a martini if you find the right aromatized wine, but that's seriously subjective, so you'd have to play around. James Bond's Vesper cocktail springs to mind, and I think the subtle notes of Lillet Blanc would support the strawberry nicely. The Vegetarian Flavor Bible (which I definitely recommend taking a look at) recommends the pairing strawberry+ginger+maple syrup+rhubarb. I think maybe a foghorn (essentially a moscow mule subbing gin) would be fun. Perhaps you could add demerara syrup for the caramelly warmth? I think the pairing strawberry+cream+lime might be nice, and a Ramos Gin Fizz fits the bill there. The RGF is an obnoxious drink to make right, though, so maybe shy away unless you're confident in your technique.

Anyways, that's all some normal stuff. Let's get weird. VFB says that strawberry/almond is a good combo, so how does your gin play with Amaretto? Luxardo? Could you somehow just do gin+cream+liqueur like a White Russian does with vodka? Anyways, TLDR here's some drinks:

Gin & Tonic: Gin, tonic water.

Negroni: Gin, campari, sweet vermouth

Vesper: Gin, Vodka, Lillet Blanc (I use elderflower liqueur)

Foghorn: Gin, lime, ginger beer

Ramos Gin Fizz: just look it up, dammit.

Just play with it. Basically any drink that calls for gin could be improved with strawberry gin.

#alcohol tw #cocktail recs