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#not that I care to critique the line because literally not the point of this book but since we're here and I mentioned the symmetrical thin
coffeeandcalligraphy · 5 months
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rereading the worst scene I have ever written in my entire life and why did harrison have to drag lonan so hard here:
The sound of Lonan’s voice is like crashing into a concrete wall.
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assumptionprime · 12 days
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I need to rant about the Fallout show
Because this is the person I am. Full spoilers, so I’m putting it behind a Keep Reading:
I’m a huge sucker for Fallout (yes even 3&4). And I went into the Fallout show with some… trepidation. Amazon has been a mixed bag on adaptations, we could have been blessed with a Good Omens, or cursed by a Rings of Power. But early buzz and reviews seemed positive, so I slammed the whole thing in one night with my spouse (we were staying at my in-laws house and they have Prime. Time was a factor.)
And y’know? I was really enjoying it! The characters were fun, the plot was engaging enough, and the costumes and visual design were extremely on point. There were some minor lore quibbles to be had: Ghouls needing some kind of medicine to not go feral. Really, more Enclave holdouts? Timeline and date whoopsies. Wait are they in California? Where the hell is the NCR?
I made a face at Shady Sands being bombed and the NCR collapsing. But I wasn’t completely out of the story. Based on what I had seen so far, I thought it was building to a reveal that the Brotherhood had done it. That the more zealous turn they took in Fallout 4, which has clearly carried to how they are portrayed in the show, lead them to bombing the NCR. War never changes, as they say. Maximus even says when asked what happened to Shady Sands: “The same thing that always happens.” Yeah, it leans into Bethesda’s weird desire to keep the Fallout world in a state of perpetual wastelands full of raiders and no civilization, but it wasn’t so terrible that I couldn’t still enjoy the show.
But then.
BUT THEN.
Episode 8, and the reveal of Vault-Tec apparently being the ones who dropped the first bomb in the Great War.
I was surprised to hear that some fans have apparently been debating over who fired first? Some even asked Tim Cain about it?
That’s really odd to me because, in the games, there is already a pretty definitive answer to which side sparked the Great War:
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Who fucking cares?
The world ended. What does it matter who shot first?
There is no China, no United States, no communists or capitalists left to fight about it. 
It's a powerful little bit of lore.
For all the posturing, all the promises from each nation that their way is the true way, all the nationalism, the militarism, and blind loyalty to flags over humanity, they both lost. Everyone lost. All that remains of the ideologies and nations that were so important to the people of 2077 is faint echoes over vast expanses of radioactive ash.
Who started the end?
No one knows. No one cares.
It only matters that their conflict was so bitter, so all-consuming, that one of them dropped their bombs, and the other dropped theirs in return.
The truest legacy of the old world is the devastation left by their final, most horrific war.
Can we do better?
Then the show says "Nah, Vault-Tec did it. It's not a commentary on human nature and the futility of self-destructive conflict, it was actually these guys, these mustache twirling villains huddled in a darkened room literally plotting to end the whole world so they can rule what's left."
And I can see the attempt to make this a critique of capitalism. I actually paused the show to praise a bit of writing when Coop is talking with Charlie before the war, when Charlie tells him that the “cattle ranchers are in charge” to illustrate how capitalism and corporations hold too much sway over the government, it felt very in line with how in New Vegas one of the recurring critiques of the NCR is that all the real power is in the hands of the “brahmin barons.” Nice parallel, spot on!
But “we’ll set off total thermonuclear war so we can rule the ashes and have a True Monopoly” isn’t capitalism. It’s just dumb “we’re the baddies” writing.
And then Shady Sands was also Vault-Tec?! Forget any meaning in the NCR falling to the same corruption and/or factional fighting that consumed the old world, they were literally just bombed by the evil shadow conspiracy that apparently also killed the old world. Hank gives this speech about factions fighting and the futility of it all while we see the Brotherhood fighting Moldaver’s NCR remnant, and like, no! You can’t say that when you’ve made it so neither the old world or the NCR fell to war with another faction! It was you! You and your band of cryogenic supervillains!
I don't care that they changed it. Timelines and dates and little retcons don’t bother me all that much. I care that they changed it to something so much worse.
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leocchisart · 16 days
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OKAY; We need to talk about this TyZula scene:
this scene has been talked about a LOT. specifically by anti-tyzula/azula fans. but for this "rant" im looking at it through the lens of just azulas character.
it is DETRIMENTAL to azula as a character. this will be a slightly indepth review i guess. im sure someone already talked about this and what im going to say, but i just want to bring it to light considering some of the anti-azula/tyzula stuff i've been seeing recently
Part 1: Azulas reaction to the way Ty Lee approaches her
the way ty lee approached azula is really important here. you might just think, "oh leo it's just Azula being jealous!" but when ty lee walks up to azula saying, "thank goodness you're here!" (i didn't get this part in the clip cuz im a fool and didn't record it on time but whatever go watch the clip on youtube) this qoute is really impactful. it possibly made azula feel less than ty lee. here is the qoute again, "Thank goodness you're here", i feel like azula would take this very personally.
even just the single first sentence. "Thank goodness" is obviously ty lee thanking azula, but for what? you might say, "well yeah for being there" but i genuinely believe azula would interpret this along the lines of, "she only wants me when she needs me" or something like that.
Part 2: Azula's jealously towards Ty Lee
i think a lot of people solely think she's jealous over the boys liking ty lee more than her. but it's not just that. i genuinely find that azula is not only jealous of the boys, but also social interaction in general. specifically with ty lee having that skill and her not.
we don't have much information as to mai, ty lee, and azulas experience in the Royal Fire Academy for Girls, but im assuming azula didn't need much social skills to succeed there. she had two close friends to deal with people speaking to her, and was literally a crown princess of the FIRE NATION. if she couldn't get what she wanted whether mai or ty lee were there- she could always use her royalty as her advantage. i also can see her threatening those in school who opposed her (without using her royalty as a reason). there is a key moment we see during a flashback where azula and ty lee are playing. azula did her best to preform a cartwheel and failed while ty lee succeeded. because of this azula actually pushes ty lee down!
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keep in mind that this is one of azulas closest friends other than mai. we can only IMAGINE what azula would do to a student who got in the way of something she wanted.
so yes; azula is jealous of ty lee getting attention from boys, but it's not solely that. it's her social skills that she's also jealous of.
Part 3: The Conflict
azula gets defensive after her reaction to the previous plot point. she verbally attacks ty lee because of it. azula says to ty lee, "those boys only like you because you make it so easy for them! you're not a challenge, you're a tease."
yes azula is "critiquing" the "way" ty lee attracts men. azula is saying she'd do the exact opposite. but the opposite is all she knows. she grew up learning the power of being the best, being perfect, and fear mongering. she genuinely sees that as the way to handle ANY social situation.
as far as, "it's not like they actually care who you are." qoute goes; azula sees this as another flaw in her interactions with men.
example is when she tries to convince chan to to maybe (?) have a relationship or farther; she uses (not exactly royality) but her skills as a skilled bender for a reason to stay with her. considering she has no social skills, her only option (in her mind) is to use her higher power. ty lee doesn't use her high rank in nobility (along with her chi blocking abilities) to what azula would call an advantage.
im not defending azulas verbal assault on ty lee. im solely explaining (imo) the feelings behind it.
Part 4: Ty Lee's reaction
This one is simple. ty lee is hurt by azulas words. obviously.
Part 5: Azula's redemption for this scene
it already baffles me when people say azula is (pure evil) just based on her actions between others. but this scene shows a side of azula we haven't been able to see so far through the series. an apology. not only did she apologize to ty lee but admitted her mistake and explained why she said what she did. i think it's insane that people solely walk past this scene and only see it as azula bullying ty lee. if anything it's the opposite. yes she makes a rude remark, but after seeing ty lee's reaction she IMMEDIATELY takes her comment back an apologizes.
this is so human and shows a side we hardly ever got to see. especially when it's specifically between her and ty lee. their relationship is so important as far as azulas character goes. (not to get too deep into it but,) even in "Azula and the Spirit Temple" ty lee is one of the illusions that the spirit attempts to make her happy with. azula obviously has a strong connection to ty lee in a loving and caring way that most people look past. whether it's from these scene or that specific comic. obviously their relationship has unhealthy flaws but what relationship doesn't?
Part 6: A quick resolution
so there you go. basically an essay on a single 36 second clip i just wanted to give azula some light because people ALWAYS paint her as "crazy" or "evil" but that's simply not true. same goes for TyZula. yes there is a power imbalance, but azula does admit her mistakes and apologizes for hurting ty lee's feelings.
Anyway thanks for reading!!
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fatuismooches · 1 year
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How do the Harbingers spend Christmas/the holidays with their lover? What do they do with the reader?
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Imagine spending Christmas with the Harbingers, set in a modern world. [I also listened to Last Christmas while writing this. Maybe that will enhance your reading.]
Pierro never had time for Christmas before. The holidays always flew by for him, since he was always so busy working. Or more like, he continued to work as there was no reason for him not to. He had no one to spend time with, so why should he take a break? That was until you slid into his life and forcibly stopped him from doing that ever again, literally scolding him for even thinking about not being home for the holidays. Though, he doesn’t really know what to do. I mean, he’s aware of what people do during these times, but do you want to do all of that? How do you celebrate? What you came to realize was that he doesn’t like to do much during the holidays. All he really wants to do is spend time with you. And so, he is content with pretty much anything you choose to do.
Really, Pierro has come to enjoy and appreciate even the very simple things that occur between the two of you, that may seem boring to others. Reading out the complicated instructions on a package or recipe, even stealing his coat in public (which he always tries to hide from the eyes of others due to embarrassment, and also not wanting others to see you.) Reading Christmas novels with you comes to be one of his favorite traditions. It may not be a typical Christmas, but it’s one with you, and that’s all that matters to Pierro.
Capitano is really amazing during the holidays. Why? Because it’s always cold and wintery and he gives the best cuddles during these times. I don’t know why but I can see him unironically liking ugly Christmas sweaters. You originally brought him one as a joke but he actually started to wear it around the house. Most of the time you don’t mind because laying on his chest with it on is very soft and nice. Capitano is also the type to just go along with whatever you say because he rarely ever argues with you, plus he has no idea how to be festive so he just follows your lead. You find this adorable since he’s usually regarded as the captain who everyone follows, but when he’s with you, he’s hovering over your shoulder trying to mimic your movements.
You handle all of the cooking and stuff along those lines. It’s not like Capitano can’t cook, but rather, every time he tries to handle the ingredients, they always get up wrangled or mashed up due to his extreme strength (he apologizes so seriously every time and you have to hold yourself back from dying of laughter.) He feels bad for not helping with anything, so you let him do the mixing and beating parts. (Do not let him crack an egg.) Though, Capitano handles all of the heavy lifting. You two always get a lot of stares in the supermarket, because there’s this tall, hulking man, trailing behind you carrying dozens of items easily, while you’re leading him around. He doesn’t even let you hold a purse or bag. Singlehandedly carries the tree up the stairs as well. Capitano comes to enjoy the holiday more than he thought. He has some stories to tell his troops now.
Dottore on Christmas is… honestly, I don’t know what to write. He is not a festive man at all, does not care about it whatsoever. He will stand there and watch you if you try to put up lights or a tree and laugh when you fail. You will not be able to convert him so I don’t suggest trying. At the very least, you can try to put on a Christmas movie. He will critique it, point out the awful cliches, the overused plot points, the corny romance, and much more. You hear more of him talking than the actual movie, but it’s the time together that matters, right?
Though, if there’s one thing he appreciates, it’s the delicious food. Zandik did not care much for the taste of food before, only viewing it as a form of sustenance, but he can’t deny that your cooking is exquisite. However, he likes to experiment a lot of course, so there have been times he added random ingredients behind your back. You don’t find out until you tasted the final product - it either tastes God-awful or surprisingly good! In general, a frequent pastime for the two of you is making a small batch of a new recipe, and Zandik throwing in whatever he thinks will somehow enhance the flavor. Either way, he is smiling maliciously and eating it since the taste does not matter much to him. Curse that maniac genius meanie. >:(
Columbina enjoys the holidays a normal amount. She really likes shopping for cute clothes for the two of you, getting Christmas drinks, eating sugar cookies and hot chocolate, and all of the other sweet things couples do around this time. Around the holidays she gets especially clingy and cuddly - it’s her way of showing how grateful she is for you. Columbina also loves to steal your sweaters too. She likes to take photos with Christmas filters with you and post them to the group chat - the ones that add Santa hats and beards, or reindeer antlers, or falling snowflakes - you name it. She likes to take photos in general - she is really photogenic, in your opinion. Even when she’s not posing, she manages to look so beautiful especially when it’s snowing.
On Christmas day it is a challenge to get yourself and her out of bed. Columbina literally holds you hostage in her arms, refusing to let your warmth leave her. She would honestly spend the day in bed with you and some snacks while watching movies if you didn’t force her to get out of bed with the promise of gifts and more cuddles later. Overall, Christmas with her is sweet and endearing. She’s always near you, likes to drape yourself over you when you’re opening your gift, and giggles in your ear. Smothers you with kisses by the time the day is up.
Arlecchino on Christmas is surprisingly sweet. You would think that she spends it alone, but in recent years, she had begun to spend the holiday in the orphanage she had opened up not long ago. Arlecchino and you always make sure that kids have delectable dinner on Christmas day. There’s always a really long table with chairs and plates for all of the dozens of kids. (They tend to fight over who gets to sit around Auntie Arlecchino and you, which secretly embarrasses her.) She is also very good at wrapping gifts. Arlecchino became a master of the skill after helping to wrap dozens of gifts for the children at her orphanage. In the days coming to the holidays, you two wrap gifts for the kids after she teaches you how to do it efficiently.
After all the kids are put to bed after an eventful day, she likes to spend some time with you on her lap near the fireplace, maybe some wine too to wind down. Arlecchino has never been a very wordy or gushy person, so it greatly surprises you when she confesses how thankful she is for you, and how she loves you very much for staying with her. (The children will never stop bringing up how they found the two of you asleep together the next day.)
Pulcinella (platonic!) has seen and experienced a variety of Christmases. He knows the dos and don’ts of how to celebrate. He knows which decorations go with each other, what theme to do this year, the kinds of food people would like the most, and more. He shows you every step of his planning, wanting you to carry on the traditions. However, the one thing he won’t teach you is his secret stash of scrumptious recipes that he refuses to give to you until he’s in his grave. You can whine all you want but he is not giving you that mac and cheese recipe.
He does not have any family left besides you so he encourages you to invite your friends over for Christmas. You invite your friend group (the Harbingers) and even though he’s seen them a few times before, he always scrutinizes them carefully to analyze who you’re hanging out with (especially Dottore - heavily on Dottore…) You all have a good time - he usually leaves you alone with your friends as he doesn’t want to intrude on your youth. But after everyone leaves, he likes to watch these old black-and-white Christmas films with you and tell you about how back in his day… *insert lots of stories and his grandpa rambling.*
Scaramouche has never cared for the holidays. He had long been estranged from his mother, having cut contact with her, therefore having no one to be with during the festive times. But Kunikuzushi declared to himself and everyone that he did not care. It didn’t bother him as he saw families shopping for the holidays, or couples getting Christmas-themed drinks together. Hmph, he couldn’t care less. Well, that was until you came into his life, and brought the holiday spirit with you. When you wake up one day, all excited and way too early for his liking, taking a bunch of utensils and cooking stuff out, retrieving oval lights he didn’t even know you had, Kuni questions you in a sleepy stupor - what the hell are you doing? After you recovered from that jaw-dropping statement, you immediately exclaim about the holidays and how you must prepare! There was no time to waste! 
But Scara just rolls his eyes and slumps back into bed, confusing you. And that’s when it clicks - your lover has probably never understood the point of holidays like these, which stemmed from his lack of love and familial bonds during his upbringing. He most likely thought this was stupid and a waste of time. So you gently introduce the idea to him. You ask him to help you bake cookies (to which you have to add less sugar since he doesn’t like sweets.) He begrudgingly helps you make a small Christmas dinner, and when you teasingly throw some flour at him, he returns it ten times more. You teach him how to wrap gifts, too. 
He ends up admitting that all of the activities were oddly comforting. Scaramouche opts for the more homely and loving aspect of Christmas, not caring much for the gaudy extra decorations or tree or whatever. It takes him a couple of Christmases to truly warm up, but deep down he can’t deny that spending time with you on the holidays is something he secretly looks forward to every year. Perhaps one day his mother could join the two of you. One day, maybe.
Sandrone was not very interested in the holidays either, more because she had better things to do rather than to partake in some silly little celebration. Why would she care about such things when she could be researching? Even as a child she saw it as useless, preferring to lock herself in her room doing far more productive tasks. Well, that changed when you came along, begging her to at least semi-join you in your favorite traditions. For the first time in her life, she finds herself helping you haul a small tree into your shared place and making ornaments out of her spare parts from engineering. Also, Sandrone likes to observe people on Christmas with you. Seeing people flood the stores searching for a last-minute gift, or even slip on snow, she finds it amusing and interesting.
If you’d like she would make her robots hang up the decorations instead so that you could just relax with her (she was getting a bit annoyed at how your presence was always so far away.) After spending the days with you, Sandrone finds the idea of the holidays a bit more appealing now. (She began to dress up her robots in small Christmas outfits that the two of you sewed together, like elves and reindeer. She would die of embarrassment if anyone else saw.)
La Signora gets invited to a lot of Christmas parties and always wears a new dress to each of them. Can’t be seen wearing the same outfit to an event. Though after she met you, she decided to spend less time going to these parties and spend more time with you. How, you ask? She’ll host her own party of course, with her darling lover. Signora dolls you up real good and makes sure you look absolutely stunning. She wants everyone to know that you two belong to each other, to not come near her territory. (The message comes through loud and clear.) Signora is an excellent host, but she never leaves your side for too long. Takes over uncomfortable conversations for you and watches out for any possible weirdos who try to talk to you. She makes a toast to you and praises you which everyone claps to. Even if you don’t like large gatherings, she still manages to make it feel good.
After everything is finished, she likes to spend some alone time with you. It is late in the night, but Christmas is not over yet, she reminds you. Rosalyne seems to be the type to enjoy slow dancing with you, chuckling as you step on her feet sometimes. Watching her sway her hips and twirl you around is simply enchanting. I can see her ending the night by drinking some wine and little snacks, talking until you both fall asleep.
Pantalone loves Christmas because he now had a reasonable excuse to spoil you with gifts without getting reprimanded by you. No, really, he does not hold back. The gifts are piled so high that you can barely see the Christmas tree anymore, the only thing peeking out was the star at the top. Pantalone has a list that he makes in the months coming to December. Every time you show even the slightest bit of interest in something, whether you stare at it for a second or offhandedly mention that it looks cool, it’s getting added to the list. You get items you barely remember seeing yet Pantalone’s laser memory reminds you of the exact moment of when you commented on it while he smiles proudly. You honestly probably have a whole room dedicated to the miscellaneous gifts you get from him.
Also the kind of guy who will always deeply cherish whatever you get him. He especially likes homemade gifts - he finds that idea of you going out of your way to handcraft him something so incredibly sweet. Puts it in his office so he can look at it while he’s working. Of course, Pantalone also likes to take you out to scenic spots for dinner. Shamelessly books the whole restaurant and makes sure you two get the best view, with lots of glazed snow and five-star courses.
Childe adores the holidays, mostly because he genuinely loves spending time with his family. They bring him so much joy, and when the first Christmas with you as his lover rolls around? He’s so eager and excited for you to join the tradition. Yes, he had invited to you spend Christmas with him and his family before, but that was when you two were just friends. Now it’s completely different, Childe insists. And no, there is no possibility of getting out of this. Do you have to work? Too bad, he’s personally going to your boss and politely forcing them to give you your rightfully deserved days off. 
Expect to spend a lot of time with his siblings - Tonia, Anthon, and Teucer. Decorating the tree? Check. Putting up Christmas lights? Check. Ugly Christmas sweaters? Check. No matter how corny or embarrassing it is, Childe is convincing the whole family to join him. (Though it’s not very hard considering how much his siblings look up to him. They tend to comply easily.) His new, favorite tradition though? Kissing you under the mistletoe. Literally recruits his siblings to randomly place them all over the house, and even in the middle of his conversations with you. Ajax is quite devious and greedy when it comes to you.
Bonus - Poly!Harbingers: Friendsgiving with poly! Harbingers except it's for Christmas (and you all live in the same mansion.) Dottore is banned from bringing anything for obvious reasons and Columbina is too because her cooking is inedible most of the time. Childe is the best cook and makes most of the feast. I think Signora is also a good cook so she helps him too. Pantalone buys everything and Sandrone’s robots makes sure the place is decked out in the prettiest decorations. Arlecchino and Columbina cuddle you with the static of some movie in the background - Columbina is trying to feed you sweets before the feast while Arlecchino is trying to stop her. Dottore tells you about all the miserable people he’s seen so far while he laughs (typical of him.) Scaramouche disses the food despite enjoying it, nearly causing a fight. Pierro is making sure things like that don’t happen and oversees everything. Capitano struggles to do any of these delicate tasks so he kind of just stands there with you and makes sure you aren’t doing anything. Though, he puts you on his shoulders so you can place the star on top of the Christmas tree!
Even if your cooking is the most mediocre thing there, all of them will be eating it up like their last meal. The house gets very loud especially when they start passive-aggressively fighting over whose food you liked the best. They take pictures of you doing everything - by the tree, in the snow, opening gifts, catching you off guard while eating, while you’re drunk - they have a shared album of over a thousand pictures by the end of the night. (They also make sure they all receive kisses from the dozens of hidden mistletoes around the house.) It is a very good and chaotic Christmas indeed.
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khruschevshoe · 5 months
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OFMD Critique: Finales, Writing Backwards, and the Importance of Building Relationships
Continuing on the rambling meta bc it turns out there are a couple of people that responded well to my initial thoughts...
Am I the only one that felt like the OFMD Season 2 finale suffered from the exact same problem as the Game of Thrones or the How I Met Your Mother Season finales? Well, not exactly the same, but lemme explain.
The treatment of Izzy Hands in Season 2 of OFMD feels like when they sat down to write this season, they wrote his death scene first (for whatever reasons that might be, though likely for the sake of Ed's arc- we're not going to address my feelings on THAT rn), THEN backfilled his arc for the rest of the season based on that, but then didn't rewrite his death scene to address the stuff that organically happened when writing the rest of the season.
Like, for example, I've seen plenty of people point out that the deathbed apology from Izzy to Ed doesn't really work (I fed your darkness) both in regards to the sheer imbalance of damage shown onscreen between Ed and Izzy, but also doesn't work as a "putting Blackbeard behind us" scene when Izzy figuratively (and literally, if you count him as part of the group with the cannonball) killed his half of Blackbeard in the storm scene in 2x2, with whatever parts lingering in him killed with the unicorn scene in 2x4. After this point, his arc and his focus has very, very little to do with Blackbeard or hell, Ed in general besides the couple of comments made to Ed and Stede that cement that Izzy is happy that Ed moved on and found someone that makes him happy.
Izzy's arc has left Blackbeard behind already. He has already hit the emotional beat that the finale wants to retread.
And then the other part of his deathbed comments to Ed- "the crew loves you, Ed"- makes no sense from the Ed side of things. The show built up an arc for Izzy that would make people care when he died, but that arc was literally about the crew literally putting aside their differences/fear/distrust of each other to help, support, and accept Izzy as their figurehead, their protector, their friend, their recovery, their family, their (insert positive symbolism/metaphor for all of the VARIOUS implied flirtations here).
What did they have with Ed? Other than his moments with Stede and Fang, what relationships were built up before Izzy's death? Calypso's birthday included no scenes of the crew interacting with Ed other than the short Archie/Ed/Stede convo at the beginning. We get none of him talking to them when prepping for the party. He spends 2x7 and 2x8 with Stede, only having scenes with Stede, never building anything with the crew.
THE LAST SUBSTANTIAL INTERACTION ED HAS WITH THE CREW BEFORE IZZY DIES IS THE "INFLUENCER APOLOGY" IN 2X5 (other than with Fang in the boat). Holy shit, I didn't even realize that until I got to this point in the meta. I had realized that something felt wrong/off about the "the crew loves you line," but I thought that it was because 2x1-2x3 cast such a long shadow on the rest of the season that it was impossible to escape. No, there were cracks in the back half of the season as well.
All of which is to say: if you have to kill Izzy (which you really, really don't, btw, it makes little sense in a show where pretty much every character has survived a near death experience with nary a scratch, but for the sake of hypothetical), there is a way you can pull it off: you have the crew at Izzy's side as he dies instead of Ed. You have their relationship with Izzy at the forefront, because their relationship is the one that matters at this point in the narrative. You have Izzy die trying to save one of them, not by random gunshot.
And then after Izzy dies, you finally give the crew their agency back. You let Izzy's death be the last straw in THEIR arcs. You let them tell Ed that they cannot allow him to stay on the ship after everything. You let them tell him that they are putting their foot down, and he can go retire if he wants, but they will not let him destroy this crew anymore.
(Or, you know, you can have all of that with a death SCARE instead of an actual death, and allow Izzy to sail off into the sunset as a first mate instead of as a dead body. Because that would suit the tone of the show and the story better.)
But I have the feeling that point B (Izzy dying/his death scene) was the thing that was decided on first, and so the budget crunch/other factors may have led the writers into making the same mistake as so many before them have: writing point A out organically, and then failing to change Point B when it no longer fit the story they had written.
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fungalittleweirdo · 2 months
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Yandere Rise Donatello Designer AU
okay, hear me out.
let me give context for this concept idea first (you could skip the next paragraph if you don't care, i'm just weird, i promise i start discussing the concept right after this next paragraph trust me)
i am a huge fan of this one designer in new york, bella pietro, her work is amazing. i was able to attend her bridal line debut fashion show in person this past sunday and got to speak with her very briefly. she's very lovely, relatable, super down to earth, and humble. she is also one of the influences for my own jewellery line, but this isn't the point i'm making, i'm going insanely off topic. i thought about what it would be like being a clothes designer in nyc.
donatello is the founder and ceo (at least, that's canonically what i'm led to believe) of Genius Built Technologies. it's also canon he designs Genius Built Apparel. i initially had this idea and shared it on discord a while back based around donnie being a member of a discord server with other designers. these designers usually joined said server for creativity, support, sharing each others' work, and giving critiques when wanted.
imagine you, an up-and-coming designer, join this server to gain more reach. while donnie was bored looking at others' designs and critiquing them harshly when asked to, he admired your work and advocated for you so that you could gain more popularity. the two of you accepted each other's friend requests and started talking in dms. he admired your work and thought it was cute how you were slowly rising in the industry, but you needed the right connections to actually get things going. you started getting seamstresses and a manager, but that took your time away from donnie.
donnie might have found out you lived in new york, that was when he suggested a meet-up for a collaboration. he was excited when you said yes, and a GB Apparel x For You line was in the works for when the two of you started discussing potential pieces. your crew got a little upset when you put all your attention on the collaborative project, especially your manager, and they thought it was a bad idea. you thought about listening to them and backing away to work on the collab line in the future. donnie... didn't really like that.
he loved spending time with you, as hard as it was for him to admit it. he adored the way you drew your designs, the face you made when you focused and shrimped over your tablet to get the details just right. he told you to adjust your posture, and you did it with a stretch, you ran your fingers through your hair he so badly wanted to run his fingers through instead. donnie hated the thought of having that taken away from him. once you told him you wanted to file away the collaborative project for another time, he managed to manipulate and gaslight convince you into believing your manager has the wrong idea, because his own brand was well known and high quality.
you hesitantly agreed with him and your crew began getting a distaste for you when you arrived late to meetings, made decisions with poor judgement, and delayed your own projects in favour of working with donatello instead. what you didn't know is that donnie anonymously emailed them all to quit their jobs with you because you were practically not working with them anymore. your crew moved on to work with other local designers. you didn't think much of it, you were aware people in this business would come and go, they would find other people to work for and it's no big deal, because you could sew your designs yourself.
besides, donatello had been a big help, he lent you his sewing machines that literally sewed by themselves. your own fall line had been presented on a runway at a moderately sized venue, a team curated by donatello organised it as if he were your manager. everyone on the server the two of you met on barely showed their support at first, until you got incoming praises and compliments from everyone after donatello's worship of you was sent in the runway channel. you were unaware to the fact that donatello threatened everyone with their careers if they didn't support you.
everyone seemed beginning to dislike you, your fans acknowledged that it didn't seem to be you at fault because your head was still held up high, staying positive and thanking anyone who bothered to take a look at your collection. donatello was working behind the scenes to isolate you as much as possible. he didn't want anyone taking you away from him because you were his precious fashion genius, your ideas complement his. that's why GB Apparel x For You is going to rock the fashion world, he had thought, deep in his delusions of spending more time with you. one look at you and it had his heart beating out of his chest.
your workspace in his apartment was a mess, fabrics everywhere, sketchbooks and a couple tablets (courtesy of Genius Built Technologies) with plenty of space for designs and you sat on the floor with your hair a mess and new glasses (those were courtesy from donatello himself) on your face after staring at the screens for so long. the softshell simply watched you work, enamoured and savouring the way you find his apartment more comfortable to work in because yours is already so cluttered.
donatello was so proud to see the results of your collaboration, he kissed the top of your head and held you close. you've had affectionate friends before, but you had only intimately known donnie for a few months. sure, he was one of the turtles that saved new york years ago, not to mention his brand even climbed up the ranks for a place in paris fashion week alongside balenciaga and valentino... so you knew him... but you didn't ask for this. you used to have more friends, lovely colleagues. whatever happened to that ?
of course, once the collab line debuted in the spring you went back to work, you designed a men's fall line you thought would grab people's attention. it certainly snatched donatello's, when he called you frequently and realised you were parting from him to work on your own, it pissed him off. he wanted to know what you were hiding. you hesitantly let him in on a day when you were being interviewed by april for press, dressed up for photography and not for him. you're only for him, no one should see you except when you're beside him. he lashed out at you in front of april, upset that you weren't telling him your plans since the GB Apparel x For You collaboration, and april took notes of the drama. not for press purposes at all, but to tell his brothers.
you didn't see donatello for a while after that, to which you were glad. you felt a weight finally slipped off your shoulders as you rebuilt your community. people didn't know that donatello was the one at fault for your darkest moments. you rebuilt your community over the course of a year, making new connections and finally making it into new york fashion week all by your own efforts, not by donatello's.
it was when he showed up at your door everything went downhill again. he pushed his way back into your life, asking for a spring GB Apparel x For You line even though he already started on his own designs, incorporating style that you would add due to how well he already knew you. over the year he had been gone, he watched how you grew and connected with other people in the soho fashion scene. the thought made his skin crawl. it irked him to know you were out and about, perhaps having dinner with your new manager, or spending hours at a time with your new seamstresses after you threw out the sewing machines he so lovingly gifted to you.
all he wanted was to share his world with you, have you live in lavish luxury like you deserve. you said no. you already had ideas for your spring line which would be presented in london along with new york, you didn't have time to collaborate with him. donnie threw another tantrum in your apartment, this time feeling a lot more destructive. he threw your decorations everywhere, then held up some of your supplies to set them on fire. it scared you into submission, telling him yes, putting off your own projects to move into his apartment and get to working with him on the next collab line.
things were different this time. donatello was a lot more clingy, literally working alongside you as the two of you designed the thirty-piece collection, he made gentle suggestions and leaned in close, added and subtracted things on what you already drew. the two of you had ordered takeout sometimes and he would be the only one allowed to receive the food. you felt trapped. there was nothing you could do about it, just accept your fate.
you disappeared off the tabloids, no one knew where you went, not even april. donnie kept you away for his eyes only, wrapping his arms around you at every chance he got, nuzzling into your neck from behind as you tried to break through the parental locks donatello placed on your tablets. that won't work, darling, he said, a smirk on his face you could feel against your skin. it made you sick, your stomach churning at the thought that you might stay in your captor's arms forever.
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celluloidbroomcloset · 4 months
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sorry about this, it's been on my mind for a while, relating to your celebrity discourse post.
You're right in pointing out TW has been treated unfairly. He puts his foot in his mouth sometimes (there are times I just wish he wouldn't say anything or at least think it through). HOWEVER, since last year it's become extremely common to take things he says out of context and use them for rage bait clicks. And often when he does get 'criticism' its often for something he either didn't say at all or something that, while not great, has been twisted and overblown to look much worse.
What frustrates me is a lot of people seem to be doing this on purpose. It's like they're watching and waiting for him to step a toe out of line so they can rile people up on Twitter.
I don't think I need to point out a lot of white celebrities have done exactly the same or worse things than him, and don't recieve the same level of backlash.
I dont think you have to be a TW stan or even fan to acknowledge that while he's made mistakes-like literally every human- he's also being treated with more vitriol than is fair.
I'll start out by saying that I'm a veteran of Film Twitter, and I've seen some of the weirdest takes known to God or humankind, from people who purport to both critique and report on film and artists in cinema (I am no longer on Twitter). I'd trace the very weird hatred of Taika Waititi to around Jojo Rabbit, when a cadre of people very loudly proclaimed it to somehow be pro-fascist (it is not, and I'm saying that as someone who has fucking studied propaganda and Nazi-era filmmaking).
There have been other things blown out of proportion in his personal life, about which I do not believe anyone should interfere or discuss in any way because it's none of our fucking business.
My observation of him as a filmmaker and writer is that he's very intelligent, tries to be thoughtful, and also, as you say, often speaks without thinking. He has said things that I do not agree with, and will not try to defend. But many of the things he has said that gained traction on Twitter have either been taken out of context, deliberately misconstrued, or oversimplified. The biggest and least problematic example are his comments about how "no one knows who directed Casablanca," which was made in the context of how he doesn't care or expect his name to be remembered, because the art is the thing (and, TBH, I agree - I know who directed Casablanca, but a lot of people who know the film will have no fucking idea, and why should they?). I am not kidding when I say that this provoked several days of argument on Film Twitter. His most recent comments have been taken entirely out of context (no, I'm not going to start fighting about them, that's not the point). If someone disagrees with him, they should at the very least disagree about what he said, not what they pretend that he said.
Some of this is just the nature of Twitter itself, and celebrity culture. There's just not much nuance and there is an awful lot of - excuse me - dingbats who don't understand media half as well as they think they do. The other element is that there is indeed a rather nasty desire to scrutinize things that are said by...pretty much everyone who is not a straight white cisgender man, and use them as cudgels to beat those people "back into their place."
I do not know Taika Waititi. I do not pretend to know what he thinks, nor do I particularly care. I do know what I see in his art, and I appreciate a lot of it. But, yes, he is being scrutinized and jumped on in a way that a fuck lot of particularly white male filmmakers are not.
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max1461 · 2 months
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At this point, "Max's abrasions with the discoursosphere" is becoming a semi-formalized series. Here's another one.
There's a larger complex of thoughts I have around this that I won't really get into, but I think one of my least favorite things about the discourse is put most succinctly as: it asks you to view yourself as an agent of history, instead of as an individual.
Every "camp"—communist, reactionary, rationalist, whatever—seems animated by these sort of fantastical, world-historic dreams. It's all about the coming revolution, or the fate of the light cone, or the future of Western civilization, or whatever. Even liberals are guilty of this, and they are sometimes extra annoying about it because they think they aren't guilty of it. Their end of history was literally sketched out in a book called The End of History. Ok, I mostly said that last sentence because it's a punchy line—not every liberal (or even most, I suspect) endorses Fukuyama's particular thesis. But they do still tend to act like "the point of it all" is advancing liberal democracy and efficient distribution of resources.
Everyone seems to reduce human activity to the aim of shaping history in a particular way. The value of everything is reduced to its instrumental usefulness in Advancing The Project.
This is precisely the opposite of the way I look at the world. It's kind of an analogue of that Hannah Arendt "the only love I know is the love of particular persons" thing. The only value I know is the value of particular things. There is value in art, learning, fun, love, joy; books, video games, mathematics, beautiful vistas, sex, food, conversation. Insofar as there is value in any political or world-historical project, it is purely by way of enabling or supporting these things which are valuable on their own. Making ourselves pure instruments to history is self-defeating, because the only possible reason that history could matter is because of us and the things that we care about.
What I am complaining about here is an attitude, not a particular set of beliefs. I'll pick on the group that is closest to "my side" because that feels fair. It is true that not all communists or socialists actually believe in the fantastical, pseudo-Biblical version of the revolution that one sees from the most ideologically insular. Plenty critique this vision of revolution pretty starkly. But it's like, the tendrils of teleological thinking are already in them. So many still see themselves as instruments. Their raison d'etre is to shape the trajectory of human events. Their existence as an individual is secondary, or at the very least must be brought into alignment with this raison d'etre.
Well, I'll tell you what. I don't want my individuality to be subsumed. I don't want my self to be subsumed. As I've said before, I'm not into that kind of stuff.
But it's everywhere, it seems that it is universally characteristic of every "ideology" or "movement".
Actually, what I'm really complaining about here is more subtle, I think. Most of the discoursers I engage with, I suspect, will roughly agree with me thus far. I've heard them say similar things. Here's the problem: even in circles where this kind of self-instrumentalization is openly critiqued, I find that again and again in discussions of [inherently valuable thing], the conversation inevitably shifts to whether [inherently valuable thing] is instrumentally valuable from the perspective of the local Grand Historical Project. By the way, please set aside any philosophical gripes you might have with the idea of an "inherently valuable thing"; those sorts of details are not the point here. The point is that there will be discussion about [cool topic], and this discussion will inevitably drift towards "how does [cool topic] interface with [grand historical project]".
[Grand historical project] is less important than [cool topic]!!!! [Cool topic] is [grand historical project]'s boss!!!! Don't you see!
This is I think the basic trait of "discoursiness", and I really don't like it.
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sunlitewhispers · 6 months
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Marvus and his money headcanon
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(Been surfing through the marvus tags and I've got some thoughts to share regarding this clown)
To start off, I personally think troll currency is more digital than physical. Like everyone uses a card to trade or get items (and its only due to the empresses restrictions on things when she removed the adults from the planet) but physical money is still real, it's just a fun thing that highbloods and high midbloods use to flaunt and to trade amongst each other.
To signify the value of the bills, they have a strip of color from the cast they were made for. For example, Teals =80, Cerulean =90, Indigo =100, etc.
(There were coins that were common amongst lowbloods and low midbloods, but that got discontinued when moving to cashless/digital. There is evidence preserving the old currency existence such as in museums showings of the old times and extremely old paintings in the clown churches.) (You can think that these coins are caegars or not)
With that out the way! On to Marvus and his money 💰
I imagine Marvus doesn't really care about money nor feels that it has a heavy connection to his identity compared to performing/entertaining. Marvus just knows that people wanna see him and lose their shit at his concerts and are willing to drop stacks to be there even with the risk of being culled.
With that, Marvus can be loose with his money, quite literally throwing it around to which some highbloods would critique the act as 'disrespectful' and 'rebellious' since money is one of the ways ancestors can provide to descendants and give them a clue to their existence. (If they want or have left a will if they died, regardless, the empire still sets them up with a small fund)
I dont know if philanthropy would be an actual thing or just be a thing highbloods (like Zebruh) say they do for approval points. But I imagine Marvus would be the type to do so in the most unconventional means.
He probably stopped his tour bus once to grab a grubshake or a handmade sandwich from a small cafe and threw a fat band on the counter saying, "Keep da change lol." Leaving the workers there in awe and fear cause damn he just weirdly blessed them, and damn they now gotta fight off his fans from stealing the marvy money. (If Marvus is there, his fans are certainly gonna be there too.)
Marvus definitely buys his crew lunch or, if he's hanging with someone, offers to pay for them when he's out and about. He stresses tf out of his accountant because he doesn't keep track of how much he spends in a day. You know his ass absolutely has a money gun to use at his concerts.
Bascially when you're Marvus, you're a baller who is a big spender.
When interacting with Marvus, depending on his quadrant, you're gonna see how he moves with his cash.
•♡ Matespirit ♡•
if you got this man in this quadrant, good luck on getting Marvus not to spoil the fuck out of you. Trust and believe he'll take any chance to drop some stacks on you. If you guys are out and you say or point out some items, you can bet that Marvus is buying them.
Oh, you think that clothing line is cute? Guess what? He's ordered the entire line to be sent to your place.
Big fan of video games? No problem! He is getting the newest console out on the market in your favorite color with your name on it.
Love sweets? Bam! He's gonna invite you over to his crib and have you watch a team of trolls bake the best desserts of Alternia.
Money ain't a thang to this man. It gives him a chance to show his love through the material means and show that he wants you to enjoy yourself and time with him. Small part of him uses money to be a temporary fix when he has to go on long tours. If he can't spend time with you on troll FaceTime or in real life, he'll send gifts to show that he's still alive and thinking about you.
However, if large displays of affections through money don't appeal to you or you start to feel overwhelmed by the purchases or think he's being disingenious in his affection, he'll pull it back.
He'll likely give you a card that's connected to his account so you can have the control to buy what you want without feeling like you have to ask him. (And such an act will give him a small piece of security to know you'll have the means to survive financially on Alternia, especially if you've expressed times of financial hardships to him)
Also doesn’t matter if it's public or private, He's gonna randomly place bills on your person, i.e., stuffing them in your pockets, slipping them in your shirt pocket, pinning them to your jacket. If you ask him why he's doing that (or wonder where he stores his cash)(btw he literally has no pants pockets) Marvus is gonna give you a saucy wink and smile all dumb and say "a mf gotta pay dem feez 4 havin a wicked mate lik u b ;0)" than he'll place a smacking wet kiss on your forehead and be all noisey about it while doing so.
•◇ Moirials ◇•
In this quadrant, his spending habit might look casual to outsiders, but with you, they'll be a tad more personal. Still be extra af like in matespiritship but he'll be spending money to clear his mind or yours.
Feeling stressed about some unfinished work? Don't worry. He'll reserve a spa service just for you.
Need to cry out some hard feelings? He's gonna get some matching pajamas and grab some emergency blankets to get that session on.
You know that one ring that SpongeBob and Patrick have to show off their friendship? He's gonna get something like that to represent your guy's moirallgience. Anything involving moirails, he will buy and send them to you.
You're definitely gonna be his merch tester and probably be brought to his trips to the galleries when he goes to buy art pieces. (Need your support and opinion when bidding for art pieces.)
Like with matespiritship, if you feel like he's being insincere or rather prefers more handmade gifts. He'll try to schedule days to create personal gifts. He might pay someone to tutor him about your interests just so you can rant without having to stop and explain what you're talking about.
Marvus will remember what your favorite snacks and favorite meals are for when you're hanging with the crew or just him. Compared to where he won't care about what someone orders, you don't gotta worry about an order mess up or reminding him. He got that locked in, unless you want something different, then just point him to it.
If there is a fucked up order for you, he will raise hell. Typically, he won't care if something he orders is messed up. He'll pay for another one. However, on behalf of his moirial, this mf gonna walk up to the counter like that meme saying they asked for no pickles. The first and hopefully (in his opinion) only time you'll ever see him asking for a refund.
A thing that'll be a routine of your relationship is him swinging by your place late af in the daytime to grab you and get some breakfast before he has to start his night.(Unless you spend the day at his hive than he'll order said breakfast and catch some more Zzzs with you.)
•♤ Kismeses ♤•
Now in this quadrant, compared to the other two, Marvus is a clown who's mischievous as hell. This bitches antics are gonna be up to 100 when it comes to him.
Honestly, you're gonna be on your toes for buying things. It'll become a back and forth of him randomly, not having money than to him having it though being really annoying and lazy with it.
If your someone who's well off, you better hide your wallet. Marvus will snag your card and make an excuse how he left his cash in his other pants/trailer/hive and buy the most stupidest shit under your name. (He'll troll cash app you back but do it so tediously that you hope your account crashes)
If he catches a single hint or a word, even a wrinkle of disgust on you, Marvus will make it the bane of your life.
You dislike the residue of his paint left on your face after a hate-makeout session? Marvus now has to buy this one face paint that is known for being messy. what? His manager told him, too. :0)
You think cowboy boots are clunky and tacky? Guess who's strolling up in some bedazzled purple lined boots that jingle when he walks.
You make a comment on how creepy troll beanie boos plushies are, he's gonna get a brand deal with them and send you a crate of his new designs. A note will be attached saying "4 my numba 1 fan ;0)~".
Similar to moirallgience, you will be a merch tester, yet you won't know if he's being serious or wanting to rile you up. Regardless, when you shit on the design he's showing you, that's how he'll know his fans will love it! Doesn't matter if it's the simplest design, an eyesore to the public, he'll promote it to the point that even your small-time friends will surely mention the product to you. Might even send a shout-out to you on Chitter for your 'help'.
Don't ask him for a bill if you want something from a vending machine. Marvus will pull the most crumpled weirdly stained bill you'll ever see in your lifetime and smile at you plainly like, "Here u go buddi dats all I can find on me atm lmao." Additionally to this, he will slowly count his bucks out if you all are in a line somewhere. (Marvus knows no one will rush him and if you complain, he'll pretend he lost count and start over)
To conclude this, watch out for when he's feeling more petty. He'll make a habit of sending you items in loud peculiar packaging that suggest to those handling it that there's something inappropriate in it when there really isn't.
•♧ Auspistice ♧•
With this one, Marvus doesn’t fit the vibe of where he might truly kill his kismeses. Nor does he seem to want to be in a situation to be aggravated enough to join in murdering someone (Going off his response to MSPA reader when the clown fight happened). However, Marvus may strive on not becoming active on those emotions. Close calls can exist.
A tiff among his roadies about best faygo flavors is a good way. His manager hassling him, and trying to change up his brand is close enough. Groupie sea dwellers trying to follow him back to his trailer and not taking a hint is a real close call.
If you mediate for Marvus a few times, he'll certainly be grateful (and a bit embarrassed) he'll grant you a gift card of some shop of your choice as thanks.
On the other hand, you've been around long enough to spot a murderous Marvus, then you're undeniably a part of his inner circle. With the exception of being his paid emotional bodyguard coach.
As business-like, it might seem in the beginning, you're a trustworthy and skillful individual in Marvus's eyes. He knows dealing with irritated trolls, particularly enraged highbloods, is not a fun nor easy task.
Other trolls may feel like this relationship is wandering into moirallgience territory.(which might be) Marvus won't really care about those opinions and possibly offer to meditate for you in the event he catches you in a tense position.
You’ll be called for his long tours when he has to do shows for sea dwellers and, without a doubt, be put through the ringer. It'll end with you guys munching on loads of the troll version of ice cream in silence.
At any point, you're too stressed to de-escalate a situation. He'll give you a paid vacation and make sure you don't come back until you are entirely stressed free.
He may tell you once he calms down that you should open a private business due to your and I quote "motherfckin dopeazz obzi-va-tional skilz."
Small note : Marvus has dealt with people trying to form a quad with him just for the fame/money, as we seen with Zebruh. So if he catches signs that what's happening, he's going to be acting distant and extremely scripted around you, then like ghost you. You'll be blacklisted from his concerts (unknowingly), and future clowns might keep a close eye on you if you hang at the churches.
Welp, that's all! Hopefully, this was entertaining to read! I do apologize if some parts feel rushed or that there were more details in some quads, I tried to keep them around the same length.
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existslikepristin · 1 year
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Been holding on to this one in a finished/unedited state for a few months now because I wasn't too happy with it. @worldsover did some editing for me. It still feels like something's missing (I'm not going to try to make Levi literally rewrite the whole thing), so feel free to give me critiques and suggestions, even if it's "yeah, I see what you mean and it is a little odd". I don't want to avoid posting it for forever, so let's call it a learning experience.
Regardless, I hope you enjoy! This is my first explicitly stated female reader insert, so that's yet another fun step.
(Also, I know I promised that the next story would be "normal" but you know what? Anything is normal compared to my last fic, so the only critique I will not be accepting is "Waaah, this isn't 'normal!'")
Tags: NSFW, TheLounge, Red Velvet, Irene, Female reader insert, anal, rimming, not a single line of dialogue, canonical silence, ass worship, massage oils, hand holding, yeah you’re deeefinitely the dominant one here
Open and Shut Up
~~~~~
No talking.
You can get behind that. That’s totally sexy. What’s less sexy… is a flowchart.
Obviously, you printed it out. Irene is going to be paying you for thi—It’s not payment, you remind yourself. It’s a mutual favor between acquaintances which may or may not involve money or goods/services which require it.
You scowl retroactively at Yeri’s so-called humorous insistence that you are, effectively, a prostitute. Performing sex acts in exchange, one time, for smoked salmon bagels is most definitely not prostitution, as you have reminded her many times.
Trying very hard to put that train of thought behind you, you glance around at the room. Low light, vanilla lavender sandalwood candles, obscenely soft towels, lube options, massage oils, and the stupid fucking laminated flowchart. You sigh—
NO! You don’t sigh, actually! Because the no talking rule was emphasized in great detail during negotiations, and included moans, groans, hums, whispers, grunts, and unnecessarily heavy breathing. And since a sigh is a heavy breath, you fucking hold that shit in tight!
But why do you need to hold in your sighs? Well, because of the final feature of the room that wasn’t mentioned two paragraphs ago: Irene, lying entirely nude on her stomach, on a bed of silk sheets, implying that your job—NOT your job, excuse you—has already begun. You entered the room mere seconds ago, so this should be extremely obvious to you, but you had to take care of a bit of exposition before you could really admire her body or get into the action. Perhaps you should do one of those two things now.
You can hardly believe what you’re seeing. Her slim legs and waist, the expanse of her back easily defeating the silkiness of the sheets she’s on, her elegant neck, her luxurious pitch black hair twirled into a loose bun, and the mild plumpness of her ass, peeking out from above the creases where her thighs meet it. Now, you’ve seen plenty of naked idols, but it’s the prestige that comes with this idol in particular that may have you so excited. Or it’s what she wants you to do to her. It’s hard to say. Point is, you’re wet, and you’re probably going to have to lay down a towel of your own.
On that note, you forgot an important aspect of the exposition: You’re not allowed to touch yourself.
That’s right. You’re in a room with a naked Irene, perhaps the most desired (per capita by fans and/or marketing departments) idol in history, preparing to gape her asshole in exchange for goods and/or services and/or currency totalling in value no less than the approximate equivalent worth of this spa treatment, and you aren’t supposed to get yourself off. But you are supposed to be naked, so you remove your shirt and bra, making just enough noise for her to hear you undressing, since that’s supposed to be how you let her know you’re about to start—
Oh, yes. Did you forget the most, actually, critically important part of your exposition? Oh, you think you caught on to it moments ago? Why, yes. You’re here, specifically, to gape her asshole. No more, except any action that will lead toward said gaping, and definitely no less. You are to take the role of dominant, while she takes the role of submissive. Never mind the fact that, per her instructions, you can’t speak, or make any noise, or touch yourself, or use her body to get yourself off, or choose your own state of undress, or touch any part of her not shown in the diagram on the flowchart, or do anything that isn’t explicitly spelled out on the flowchart… But you are required to spank her if she makes any noises. So yeah, you’re totally the dominant one here. (And, to be more specific, you are to keep track of which buttcheek you last spanked so that you can make sure to spread the ass-slapping evenly between cheeks and preserve symmetry, followed by immediate continuation of whatever action you were in the midst of prior to said spank.)
… Yes, that is the last of the exposition. What? You want to have a flashback to when the verbal negotiations were happening? Absolutely not. That’s dialogue, which is technically against the rules. It’s time to do things to Irene’s butthole. Stop stalling.
Once you remove your skirt, slippers, and underwear, you get onto your knees, noting that the floor seems slightly spongy and wondering what that’s about. Irene’s legs are closed. The crevasse of her ass on its own makes you want to scream, but the centerpoint of the cross formed by that crevasse and her thigh crease . There is the slightest gap at that point which reveals the tiniest sneak peak of what hides between. You bite down on your lips to suppress your instinctual lewd moan. Okay, you’re just getting started. Calm down, or this is going to be impossibly difficult.
You straddle Irene’s calves (without touching them!), take a deep and silent breath, and lean forward, placing your palms first on the flawless globes of her ass, then letting your fingers come to rest as well. They’re such a perfect combination of firm, soft, and smooth that it brings tears to your eyes. The inability to comment on them out loud brings you near-physical pain and certainly-mental anguish. If Irene cares, she’s not making it known. She’s deathly silent, and you only know she’s alive because of the way her back rises and falls with her breath.
Contact achieved. Looking at the flowchart isn’t necessary for now. You had a pretty easy time memorizing steps one through five since they don’t have any branching-off points. Step two is to inspect. You look away and take a couple more deep (and silent!) breaths, then increase the pressure of your hands on Irene’s butt and ever so slowly pull apart.
Within the realm of your imagination, you can see yourself comically hyperventilating. In the real world, you see a hole that you could only ever describe as manicured. Not a hair in sight, and some shade of pink so unrealistically perfect that it probably has a Pantone color named after it (Irene’s Butthole Pink? Pick a hex code). The miniscule folds of flesh are already very slightly gaped, giving you a near-imperceptible view into her interior, as if she’d had someone else very recently do what you’re about to, or as if she’d prepared herself with a butt plug. You wonder if Irene even owns a butt plug though, considering she can probably convince any person on the planet to open up her ass any time she would even want to use one. Or maybe she does have one. The Alexander III Commemorative Fabergé egg is still missing, after all…
You pull a little further, and can’t contain your shudder as not only her asshole opens by another couple millimeters, but her pussy lips spread and eventually split apart when the pressure barely overcomes the moisture holding them together. Your eyes and heart flutter, and you think you might faint. The vagina is one of many areas which is not indicated as touchable on the diagram, which hurts your soul because it’s the perfect number of shades darker than the surrounding skin and—
It’s time to focus! Asshole only! Get your mind out of the gutter!
Keeping one hand in place so she stays half-open, you get a handful of one of the massage oils. It feels room temperature, but you're supposed to hold it until it's warmer, so you stare at Irene's back as you try not to let too much drip away. The movement of her breathing is steady and subtle. In. Out. You try to match her pace. In. Out. In. Out.
When it's ready, you let the oil flow off your hand into the cleft of Irene's ass. She doesn't so much as flinch, which you obviously credit more to your excellent reading of body temperature and less to her ass-trance. But back to the butt in hand.
The oil travels leisurely down her crack, speeding up ever so slightly as the path becomes more vertical, and stopping to pool on top of her hole. You place your oily hand on its designated cheek again and repeat the process on the other side.
It’s time to really get started now… with step three-dash-C.
The tips of your thumbs meet just over her hole and press down flatly so that they do not enter her. You slowly shift them around each other and back, massaging with just the right pressure to stay on the rim. The rest of your hands are for massaging the rest of her derriere. It’s not necessary, but you want to show off your manual dexterity, and you want to make sure she’s as relaxed as can—She’s effectively already achieved Nirvana down there, from the looks of things, actually. The relaxation is for you. You’re the one who’s Nirvous about this anal—Is this a joke to you? It’s time for another spread test. You need to make sure Irene’s ready, because maybe somewhere between steps four-dash-E and four-dash-K you’ll forget to off yourself for that pun… Thank fuck you didn’t say that one out loud.
Step four is the first insertion.
Every ounce of fortitude you have is tested. You hold back your shaking. It’s just a finger. It is just a finger, right? You’ve done this plenty of times, to plenty of idols, no less. Well, not a silent butt-fingering, per se, but you’ve been knuckle deep in other idols before, and often more than one idol and often more than one knuckle! Irene just has a gravitas that makes yo—Don’t you dare say she has a gravitass. Stay. Quiet! And keep her ass spread with your free hand.
You watch the carefully trimmed, polished nail of your forefinger leisurely slip into her asshole. Then you pass your first knuckle. You stop on the second and quietly release your held breath. You don’t recall making an analogy about the feeling of her ass cheeks, but you’ll sure as hell compare the interior of her butt to cashmere. The minor gape you’d noticed previously has no effect on how tightly the hole hugs your digit.
Irene’s back rises a centimeter higher, and falls more slowly. Her pattern is broken. You catch your breath again. Did you do something wrong? Is the massage oil adequate? No, it’s only meant to be the starter. This was the whole intention. Right? You glance at the flowchart. Yes, step three, massage oil only, no additional lubrication. You do your best to relax and drag your finger back.
The way her asshole holds on to your finger is its own story of seduction, affair, and dramatic departure. She (her hole is a she) clearly doesn’t want her (so is your finger) to go, but she has to, lest her family shun her. But she cannot resist returning, leaving again despite all the kissing and languid hugging, and returning once more. One last time, she escapes completely, but after telling the story to a saucy friend, introduces Irene’s butt to them, and suddenly the sordid romance becomes a menage a trois.
Two fingers, two knuckles deep in Irene’s ass, you note your own wetness beginning to trail down your inner thigh. You aren’t sure exactly why the thought crosses your mind that you hope that it will somehow evaporate against your ragingly hot and bothered leg.
Now, out, and back in, out, and back in. With your breath. You match Irene’s. Out, and back in.
You gulp. You’re halfway through step four’s substeps. Next is the addition of another finger and more thrusting at a torturously slow pace for an actually timed five minutes. You find yourself hypnotized by it. The five minutes pass by in something more like twelve seconds, and the clock on the wall gently changes color to let you know it’s time to make the final preparations for step five. It’s not magical. It’s just connected by bluetooth to the phone to your left.
But what is magical? You’ve come this far, so you should know by now. It’s Irene’s asshole. You remove two of three fingers, then reinsert one more from the opposite hand, and as cautiously as you can, pull apart. There’s the magic.
Irene’s butt is open, and not just immediately around your fingers, but in a whole oval shape. It’s not enormously wide, but it’s enough that you could reasonably, without discomfort, insert the tip of your tongue.
… Hey. Wouldn’t you know it? That’s step five.
Rimming is always a questionable thing to do to your nose, ranging from the worst to a merely neutral idea. When you draw in close to Irene’s open ass, however, it’s the massage oil that overpowers your trepidatious olfactory sense. You’d noticed earlier that it was labeled as Fresh Linen, a scent that certainly makes sense given Irene’s reputation for laundry-doing, but it triggers a seemingly unrelated and entirely Loony memory of the smell of coffee. How the smells of linen and coffee are linked in your mind, you may never know. Perhaps you should see a professional about that.
But how’s the taste? Well, bland with the slight bitter spike of chemicals that improve viscosity but shouldn’t be ingested in large quantities. The risk of health complications is extremely low though, and you’d risk significantly more for this specific opportunity.
Irene’s butt cheeks and your face cheeks are still separated by your hands, but as of step five-dash-B that will no longer be the case. For now, your lips and tongue are in full contact, and that would be more than enough. To be licking around and inside the asshole of Irene, the rarely disputed queen of idols, you have to be infinitely lucky. You thank heaven you are.
Your focus is drawn in further and further. No more jokes. No more references to other stories. Even the most obvious pun/reference slips from your mind as you try your best to keep your tongue soft for Irene’s pleasure.
Your complete and total compliance doesn’t go unnoticed by Irene, somehow. The tiniest roll of her hips, that barest indication of her appreciation, kicks your core into overdrive. The trail down your thigh widens and it’s all you can do to beg the universe that you won’t drip on her calves.
It takes more strength than you knew you had not to squeal your desperation into her ass. Your thighs and your lungs and your everything else burn with desire. You know it’s not for want of air since your nose is still free, so it has to be your overwhelming need for Irene’s attention. You’d do anything. You are doing anything. A friendly agreement to gape her hole? No, this is a test, a labor, a trial. You’re proving your devotion.
You’re not licking a queen’s ass. 
You’re worshipping a goddess. 
It’s not a flowchart. 
It’s a divine ritual.
The shifting color on the clock only mostly guides you out of your trance. You pull away with a heavy heart, staring half lidded at the strings of saliva still connecting you with what you now live for. There’s no difference in size, but you much prefer the sheen you left on her rim to that of the oil. Step five isn’t over yet.
Do rituals have steps? You try to think back to any hieroglyphics you’ve seen in old textbooks. There were no numbers… Obviously there were no numbers. They were hieroglyphics. You can’t read that shit—
Stop.
You remove your fingers, allowing Irene’s ass to close once more. It happens slowly. You nearly choke, watching her hole return to its previous shape with your breath held so tightly in your chest that it feels like something is going to burst. Hey, maybe it will, but that can’t happen yet. That would be too loud, and your goddess demands silence, so you open your mouth to simply allow the breath to drift out along with any comments you had on the subject.
You close back in once again, this time letting your face settle against Irene’s cheeks and gently nudge them apart, reattaching your tongue to her rim. You want to dive in, to feel her squeeze you, maybe even cum around you, but that’s not part of the ritual. You need to give her rest. The best is yet to cum—no. Come. You give her the lightest rimming you can, holding your tongue back to merely caress her asshole while you silently revel in the light press of her glutes on your cheeks.
Another slight roll of her hips sends you reeling. Your vision fades and Irene is all that’s left. You can see the movement. It’s not just her breath, but her oh-so-gentle rocking back and forth that makes the light and shadows play across her back like the grains of the Elysian fields waving in the breeze. It doesn’t seem right for you to be allowed to experience this, to taste this, to be treated to a view of paradise, to understand the touch of divinity.
The gently shifting color of the clock, magenta to yellow, broadens your vision again. You back away, taking a deep breath that you only now realize you desperately needed.
Without thinking, finally, you do as Irene has commanded. You place your palms on her ass: your altar. You slide your thumbs into her glorious hole, and you pull apart softly. Her muscles have relaxed so thoroughly that you meet no resistance. She is simply open, as if this is just how she was always meant to be, told in myths that cannot be written. Her soft ass doesn’t try to clench down. It remains a portal that entices you, begs you to enter.
And you could. Certainly, as is the case with other gods, Irene could forgive you for showing her your specialty. You, the heroic champion, could show her an unexpected pleasure. Touch her clit, lap at her juices, grind yourself on the back of her thigh. Her instruction indicated that you’re the dominant one here. Make it so.
You hook the first knuckle of each of your pointer fingers, as directed, inside.
No. You can’t get greedy now. You’re not that kind of hero.
Irene opens further around your digits with no effort. Now you see the depth of her abyss, and it does not try to close. Irene wants you to see into her. Even the beautiful spheres of her ass to either side, her graceful back, her soft legs, her captivating hair… It all fades away. You know what the next step is. You don't need the clock to intuit the moment she's ready. Your higher thoughts and your lust blend together.
Slowly, you pull further apart. Not much. It may not seem like it's so small, but this immortal gateway still needs to be treated with reverence. For every millimeter you actually widen her, though, you see miles more. It makes you feel light-headed, even a little dizzy. And when you slide your fingers out, those feelings become far more distinct. Irene remains open.
Gaping may have been an appropriate word for her to have described what she wanted from you, but it was far too crude to represent what you see now. Then again, you’re not sure what else to call it. It’s been a while since the thesaurus failed you.
Irene's muscles are relaxed. Serene, even. Like this is where they should naturally be. You simply guided them.
You lean back in and gently kiss her rim. It's dangerous, running your tongue around the defined edge of the mortal and everlasting, but exhilarating. The slight rolling of her hips is your indication that Irene is feeling the same passion, for all the hubris it takes to assume such a thing about your goddess. As far as you know, she could just be moving because your tongue and lips aren't in the right places and making up for your inadequacies.
Still, every slight, slow shade of her ass against your cheek is a divine caress, urging you further along the journey. Your kisses are as insistent as you can get them without making the grave error of smacking your lips.
In the foggiest reaches of your vision, a hand reaches out to you along the floor. Irene grasps at the air like she wants something. That’s not part of the ritual. You can only think of one thing in the moment, and you take her hand in yours.
Irene’s fingers close around yours and curl into your palm. They flutter every time you swirl your tongue across her rim, and, after a moment, they squeeze.
It’s terrifying, at first, when Irene trembles underneath you. It evokes thoughts of earthquakes, brought upon by the wrath of the gods. But no, it’s orgasm. Her asshole contracts slightly, but otherwise just quivers against your mouth. It ends almost as soon as it begins.
Irene takes her hand away, and a bit of your soul with it. She lightly presses on the clock, and it shifts to white. You don’t have to be reminded of what that means. Steeling your heart, you back off of Irene’s ass and carefully push yourself up to your feet. Even at your full height, you can see into Irene’s hole. Taking it in with the full picture of the rest of her body is an incredible sight to behold. Knowing that you contributed to it makes it even more beautiful.
As you look over her, your eyes go wide and you have to contain a gasp. Irene’s calves are covered in little wet streaks, right where you had been hovering over her. Embarrassment washes over you. It's hard to imagine being so turned on as to not have felt yourself dripping on her, especially after having worried about that very thing mere minutes ago. You want to reach for a towel to correct your mistake, but you know you're not supposed to touch her. You're supposed to be dressing yourself and leaving, so you step away, and reach down for your clothes.
Your arms feel heavy as you pull your underwear up, only getting more embarrassed about how soaked they immediately become.
As you put on your shirt though, Irene moves again. You can't help but stand perfectly still, mesmerized by the smooth motion of Irene getting up onto her knees and sitting back on her heels. Now upright, she's even more statuesque, back curved inward from her generous bottom up to her gentle shoulders. One hand releases her hair from its bun, and the night sky falls past her neck, simultaneously obscuring and enhancing that gorgeous expanse.
Irene’s torso twists a quarter in your direction. It's hard to think that for however long you've been here, this is the first you've seen her face and it's merely a silhouette, not even far enough around that she could look at you out of the corner of her eye. All you can see is her eyelashes, pointed down, to indicate that her eyes are closed. The movement also coyly presents you with the side of her breast, yet another of the endless curves of her body that you have had no opportunity to worship.
One graceful arm comes back. Her fingers find their way to the cleft of her ass and sensually feel their way down. You don't even think to wipe away your drool as you watch those fingers dip inward. They move in and out, unhurried and exquisite.
Your mind reels. Were you not enough? Is she just basking in the remnants of her pleasure? Is she doing this for you to watch? Should you even still be here?
Irene continues to toy lightly with her asshole while at the same time her other hand shakes out her hair from below. 
Your legs twitch. You can't stay here anymore. You practically jump into your skirt, grab your shoes, and you're out the door. You keep the doorknob turned in your hand even as you whip yourself outside so the latch won't click when you close it.
In the hallway, you slump back against the wall. Your body is on fire. You need to be touched. You don’t live very far away. You can get home fast, and if you can’t grab someone on the way, idol or otherwise, you’ll be sitting on a vibrator all night—
The door you just came through opens again. Irene walks out in a shoulderless sweater, just long enough to cover her shorts, and sneakers. How she can look so casual, you’re sure you’ll never comprehend.
She doesn’t turn to leave, though. She steps closer to you, and closer, and closer. The hallway isn’t that wide. Are her steps inches long or is space expanding? Either way, she crosses and stands over you. It doesn’t matter what your height was. Your knees will only hold you against the wall at a height that makes it look like Irene is miles taller.
You open your mouth. You want to ask her to make good on her end of your bargain right now. Or maybe not. It doesn’t really matter. You just want to say something. But before you can, you feel the shock of physical connection. Irene strokes your cheek with the back of her fingers. Her eyes capture yours, holding you steady.
The distance becomes inches, and you’re paralyzed. She doesn’t blink as she gets even closer, but closes her eyes just in time to remove the final gap and touch her lips to yours. She kisses you so softly that you can barely feel it. In fact, the whole of your body seems suddenly light and cloudish, like a breeze could send you away. You even feel a drop of rain leave your eye.
When she retreats, she gives you the coyest smile to ever coy, and as she approaches her full height again, her fingers leave your jawline and the lightness you felt reverses. Gravity crashes your ass into the floor.
Then Irene turns to leave, breaking the line of sight to her eyes, freeing your own to wander. The last thing you see before she turns the corner is that she is not, in fact, wearing shorts under her sweater. You get one last glimpse of your handiwork. Though you can’t see very well and can’t imagine her ass is still gaped now that she’s back on her feet, it is still visibly wet, as are the backs of her thighs and calves.
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teaveetamer · 9 months
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It's okay if butwhatifidothis risks leading people to harass Captain Flash by going over his fic but it's not okay if Raxis does the same to reynaattheend?
Okay I feel like I want to get one thing out of the way before I go into this.
BWIIDT agreed to remove parts of the old reviews that were particularly rude or offensive if they were pointed out to her, something that was literally promised to the MODS of the Edelstan discord server (who claimed to have a direct line of communication to Cap).
So the guy literally had a chance to air his grievances with the posts and have the parts he didn’t like removed within reason, and we never got any examples of things to ask her to remove. So either she’s not as rude as people make her out to be, or they never actually cared about her critiques and haven’t bothered reading them, even when handed the literal opportunity to edit things out they didn’t like.
Additionally BWIIDT has said that she would be willing to remove all the postings completely if the guy would just hear her criticisms and learn from them, so he could better handle the racism, sexism, homophobia, etc. in his fic. Of which there is a lot.
I don’t know how you could possibly compromise more without just straight up being a door mat and pretending like this white man never had any issues with the way he wrote race and women.
Anyway as for why I view these as two completely different situations that are not really comparable IMO:
1) Cap’s fic is/was at the time literally being shoved at people. We were told to read it to “understand canon better”.
This isn’t just me saying this. I remember around the time before/slightly after BWIIDT started giving her criticisms of the fic I was seeing it getting recommended to a bunch of people. There were people on various social media sites complaining about the Edel crowd shoving the fic down their throats. I had it recommended to me on some different platforms, etc.
And that’s not just fans of the fics’ perception. Cap himself has stated that he views the fic as meta commentary on the game/discussion of canon, not just a fun little fic he did. And he’s happy people view it as essential for understanding canon.
As far as I’m aware, Reyna’s fic has never had that sort of culture around it, nor has she wanted it to have that kind of impact on fandom. I’m pretty sure she’s even explicitly stated that she KNOWS it’s not always aligned with canon and she doesn’t care, because it’s just a fun little project for her.
2) As far as I’m aware, BWIIDT never linked to Cap’s fic? I don’t even think she gave the title of it at first, it’s just that most people figured out what fic she was talking about BECAUSE of the aforementioned it getting shoved down everyone’s throats. But I wasn’t really following her in the beginning so I don’t remember, I’m sure she can reblog this posting if she wants and further clarify.
Raxy has literally been linking to Reyna’s fic on every posting and spelling out the full name of the fics and the author. Given his followers’ propensity for harassment (which he claims to not support) he really should have known better. He wasn’t “risking” sending her harassment it was basically a foregone conclusion.
He definitely should have taken all of the links down and stopped linking or naming the author or fic after it became clear people were literally going and harassing her, using his posts and material to throw at her. But as far as I’m aware he hasn’t done ANY of that.
3) I know from talking with BWIIDT since Raxy started harassing everyone here that she wasn’t going to bother with Cap’s fic originally, but then the annoying fans shoving it down people’s throats + she noticed a lot of very problematic handling of race that she wanted to talk about in greater depth = her discussing the fic at length.
I haven’t read through Raxy’s criticisms, but I feel like there’s a BIG difference between a woman of color pointing out the problems regarding race and gender in a fic (written by a white man) that’s being recommended to everyone as ESSENTIAL FOR UNDERSTANDING THE GAME vs. Some Guy Who Doesn’t Like A Random Fic
Additionally, I don’t really feel like it’s my place to tell her to shut up because, uh, it just feels kind of gross to tell her to just not be mad about the way the white guy is butchering the biracial experience when she’s a biracial woman and I’m not? Which again, very different from telling a 35 year old cishet white guy who is acting like a dick about anime chess to be less of a dick about anime chess.
4) And again, I also know for a fact that BWIIDT is just interested in critiquing/venting about the fic, and would be willing to stop making postings about it if Cap actually bothered to read the critiques and learn from the mistakes he’s made regarding the racism, sexism, homophobia, etc. in his fic.
But like, he keeps doubling down on it insisting that because he grew up next to a reservation and he has one queer woman doing his beta reading there could never be any problems with his handling of any of these sensitive topics, so he doesn’t need to listen to any of us ever, and people are still touting it as essential for understanding canon, and he’s still okay with that, sooooooo ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
It’s VERY different from what Raxy is doing, which is basically just calling Reyna’s fics “cringe” and “not canon” from the snippets I’ve seen. He’s also blasting them over LITERALLY every social media platform he has for some godforsaken reason. Which like. If your goal was just to critique the fic why are you posting that shut EVERYWHERE?
5) I really don’t think Raxy is that bothered by the criticisms of Cap’s fic. He harasses people regardless of if they’ve talked about Cap or his fic, and after his aborted attempt to drum up harassment against BWIIDT on GameFaqs he came to Tumblr and started begging her to “do his fic next”
Like honestly I don’t even know what goes on in that guy’s head. Weird ass behavior. I really don’t care what he has going on, it’d just be nice if he’d act like the 35 year old he actually is and quit being so petty and childish.
Even if you think what BWIIDT did with Cap’s fic is wrong, why would it EVER be acceptable to drag an uninvolved third party into the mix and bash their fic and send them harassment as “retaliation”? Reina has nothing to do with this. She doesn’t even have fucking social media accounts outside of AO3. I know because I literally left her a comment to warn her about this clown and she told me.
What BWIIDT has done with Cap’s fic is admittedly a bit of a grey area, but ultimately I fall on the side of “whatever” with it because of the notoriety and influence on fandom fans of the fic desperately want it to have, and because of just how problematic elements of it are for various communities.
I mean you can’t go reccing a fic as essential for understanding the game and shoving it down the entire fandoms’ collective throat and then expect it to be treated like a 14 year old’s silly self insert fic when the people you told to read it critique it with the gravitas you assigned to it.
If you wanna critique BWIIDT for what she did with Cap’s fic, or critique me or anyone else for interacting with her, or you just think my logic is stupid and you want to critique that, then that’s… fine? I’m an adult, I’m a person, I know there’s places I can grow. But I’m sick of people acting like it’s okay to be a shitty person just because you got your feelings hurt once, so now it’s okay to go making it everyone else’s problem. And I don’t know if it was your intention to defend the guy with this ask anon, but it’s definitely happened too damn much with this guy and the Edelgard fandom as a whole.
That was another thing that really fucked me off in that conversation with the Edelstan server mods. I had one of them acting like I run fucking Reddit and I’m somehow responsible for some trolls calling Edelgard fans Nazis four fucking years ago. You can bet your ass I would get crucified if I tried to shit talk some random ass Edeleth fic and tried to justify it with “but it’s ok cuz some Edelgard fans were mean to me once :(“. There’s a reason why the fic being touted as essential for understanding canon is the one getting critiques and not any of the THOUSANDS of other Edeleth fics in existence. Because no one fucking cares about fanfics when they aren’t getting shoved down your throat and touted as “essential”.
I mean fuck dude, I got called a fake queer and an r-slur and intentionally triggered with genocide bullshit and had people talking about killing me. Am I going around harassing random fic authors over it? No, cuz I’m a grown ass fucking adult and I know how to act like it, and I know that 99% of the people who write/have written Edeleth fics had absolutely nothing to do with that.
So if you’re justifying going after Reyna with “but BWIIDT was mean to Cap!” Then knock it off, Reyna has literally nothing to do with this and you’re being shitty by trying to drag her into it. If you just did this to spork a fic, then you’re currently being a dick over a fanfic for no reason and clearly it’s leading to the author being harassed.
@butwhatifidothis if you wanna add onto this feel free.
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will80sbyers · 3 months
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I need to vent because I'm really struggling with this reality, I can understand if you're talking about people that have done awful crimes again and again and redemption is really almost impossible after a certain line crossed even if those ppl still shouldn't be tortured or killed imo because they are people too, but putting ignorance and words on the same plane as a soldier going to shoot people in their homes is being completely out of reality to me
how are we supposed to progress and make the world safer when this extreme polarization only pushes people on middle grounds further into those fucked up ideologies from which is difficult to get out because they modify your whole reality?
I honestly don't understand this, this is just about shaming people to submission instead of actually changing their minds making them think and reflect so they can start building from there and have their own critical thinking skills
Criticism is always fair and people should be held accountable about serious things, and you shouldn't be forced to interact with them when you don't want to or don't feel like educating them, I agree with that completely (and that's why I love the blocking button)
but I'm noticing how online we jumped from "holding accountable" to "burn them at the stake and add fuel if they try to make steps to be better" and that's not being a normal person to me
If you do that irl you are becoming a bully whether you like it or not, you would be consciously harassing someone.
And if I had to act like this with the people in my life I would have to literally kill all my relatives and friends because there isn't one that has completely correct ideas about every single thing in the world and I bet it's the same thing for every single person that is doing this on the internet, my own parents have been homophobic in the past because of ignorance, my friends have been too and they are the same age as me
your background influences you and often people are ignorant and don't have others around them that can teach them or have people that continue to teach them wrong things... and now the only way they are being "teached" by the other side is by someone screaming at them that they are the devil and should die... Like, imagine doing that to students in school???? that's not teaching. that's abuse.
I hate this new mentality of labeling all real people that aren't perfect as evil regardless of what they actually did, you just take the thing that they did and distort it to give it a hyper negative meaning and you are 10000% sure they meant that as in how the most evil person on earth would, it CAN'T be ignorance and stupidity it must be cruelty regardless of what one is actually doing
It seems like people just want to push others to have self hating thoughts until they kill themselves at this point especially on fucking Twitter that's just a dumpster fire of abusers pretending to be activists from what I've seen
So many people pretending to care about mental health while ganging up on others constantly
there isn't a measure of things anymore, you don't know how to make a fair critique to someone without using abusing language and people are closing off and going away from the internet because of this, because in real life if you act like a maniacal person screaming at others all the time that they should do something you want them to do while following them around after a certain point they get a fucking restraining order for your ass
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Text
Everything Right/Wrong with Ninjago “Rebooted” E2: The Art of the Silent Fist
Disclaimers: Show owned by LEGO. This is not a professional review/critique - it’s mainly intended for comedy!
Make sure to reblog, comment, and like, and tell me your thoughts!
- Theme ✅
- How convenient for the animators that Wu’s memories are all in third person ❌
- “No robots…” Lloyd forgets that Zane isn’t dead… yet. ❌
- Where did Nya get a green suit for Lloyd? ❌
- “There’s a reason [Wu’s] lived as long as he has.” Yeah, because he’s part of nearly every mythical, immortal creature in the book. There’s so many different forms of magical DNA in this guy that, frankly, I’m surprised he isn’t radioactive ❌
- “You guys go ahead. I will stay back and watch [the blades].” Wow, they didn’t even try to argue with him, huh? The DISRESPECT ❌
- Wait, why does Nya like Cole? We saw that the two were assigned as a perfect match, but we never saw hints of Nya actually liking him and now we’re supposed to believe she’s suddenly in love with both of them? What?? ❌
- “But Cole… Cole is not Jay (positive)…” OOOHHHHHHHHH🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
- Seriously though, this is such an awful line considering Jay is her canon love interest. And don’t say they didn’t know Jaya was gonna be canon because I do not believe there was a second they were actually going to make Cole and Nya a thing ❌
- I’m not even gonna sin them for tweaking Garmadon’s design from the end of last season because this one is objectively better ✅
- “Check out the new Sensei… lookin sharp!” Jay is a Garmadon simp confirmed and I really don’t know if that’s a sin or not anymore
- “SILENCE” *WHACK* Ohoh, I’m gonna like him, aren’t I? ✅
- How did Zane not notice the blades being stolen from in front of him? He clearly wasn’t sleeping, and Pixal later even says she wasn’t built for stealth ❌
- “Pixal? What are you doing?” “Discontinuing an old droid!” D*mn ✅
- Was that even a Pixal scream? It sounded a lot like Nya ❌
- “How about we take her apart to find out!” Jeez Kai calm down. Imagine what the others would say if he wanted to dismember a human ❌
- “Relax, not a weapon!” Then why didn’t they just bring them inside in the first place?!?! ❌
- “These nindroids are so much fas-“ Give me perfectly timed cuts for 400 Alex ✅
- “wouldn’t that mean shutting down Pixal too?” “Don’t tell Zane!” The ninja don’t even seem to consider Pixal as a living entity. They only even take her into account as a reference to Zane, nothing else. You can’t convince me they would be this chill about taking out the power if a human’s life was on the line. Basically what I’m saying is the ninja are racist ❌
- “We are all different, but I do not feel so different around you…”⬇️ ✅
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- “Ever since we left I’ve been worried about [the students].” “Oh, Dareth’s looking after them.” Was that supposed to ease Cole’s worries cuz I’m pretty sure it made them worse ❌
- “Ya know, Cole, you don’t get the credit you deserve. You always put others ahead of yourself! I know the other ninja get all the attention but I just want you to know, you’re a good guy.” This is literally just the writers trying to convince us to care about Cole at a point in which such a small amount of the fandom actually did. I love Cole, I always have, but I think anyone who was in the fandom prior to the Wildbrain era can attest to how ignored he was as a character. This went off on a small rant so to clarify, I’m not sinning this because of how underrated Cole used to be (personally I think that’s more the fandom at the time’s fault than the show itself). I’m sinning this because it felt awkward and forced ❌
- “Don’t tell Jay.” Why? There was nothing inherently romantic about that line, or this situation in general, so what is there to not tell Jay? ❌
- “This is where all of Ninjago gets its power.” Zane mansplains something that even Dareth should be able to determine Pixal already knows ❌
- “I will call you Mindroid!” *angry mindroid noises* Worry not, Mindroid. One day we will join together and seek vengeance against all those who mock us with labels like “fun-sized” and “vertically challenged.” We are living versions of the pocket knife - cleverly concealed until the final moments in which we are revealed to deliver the killing blow.
- “Stupid technology!” Kai said, to the glass case ❌
- “oh who cares about probability!” this is character development… I have absolutely no idea where it came from or how Pixal developed but it sure is there ❌
- How unlucky was Pix that she just happened to land on the ONE laser we’ve seen throughout this entire episode? ❌
- *Mindroid breaks into office* “Great! Now they come in fun-sized!” ✅
- “This is no time for a lesson, Kai!” Actually, the climax generally is the time for the lesson, Jay
- The nindroids might have Storm Trooper aim but that doesn’t make it okay for the ninja to dodge in the worst possible way just to show off ❌
- Lloyd - beloved Green Bean - you’re supposed to cup the water in your hands, sweetie… not just stick your whole face in the pond like you’re bobbing for apples… ❌
- “This is why I took an oath of peace!” Why? So you and your son could get mauled by a giant, robotic dragon?? ❌
- Mindroid dies, and although killing him is 100% sinnable by death, this is actually a sin because he appears unscathed later on multiple times ❌
- Why does it take so long for Pixal to lose power? ❌
- “Your mission was important. I was not. I am to assist; I assisted.” The show never acknowledges how tragic this scene is. Well, it does, but only with Pixane, not Pixal as her own character. We constantly get to see glimpses of Pixal’s insecurities, but rarely see them built on or developed. ❌
- The only source of power for ALL of Ninjago is operated by this one tower and no one thought that was a bad idea ❌
- “We are compatible?” “Yes, yes we are.” ✅
- Look, Pixane is my favorite canon ship, but I still hate the way it happened. It was rushed, under-developed, and just didn’t feel right. ❌
- But also, Pixal only has feelings for Zane once it’s obvious that he feels that way about her so… recipromantic Pixal canon? ✅
Sentence: Mindroid coming for your kneecaps
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spopsalt · 2 months
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(I'm still in my Rick and Morty era, spoilers for season 5, seriously go watch Rick and Morty it's great) So don't get me wrong, Rick is a worse person than Catra, I mean he killed a lot more people than her (mostly in self-defense but still) but I do like how he's better written than Catra, which is why I like him more despite him being worse.
I do like how they consistently show that Rick does care about Morty, they do say that while that may be the case, it doesn't make their relationship not toxic...like one show *cough* spop *cough* but it's still nice to see.
We also get to see why he's such an asshole, he lost his wife and child, they were killed in front of him, he certainly is a horrible person, but I can definitely feel sympathy for him, he seems to insult Morty so he doesn't get too attached, Morty truly seems to be the only reason why Rick is even alive right now, as we can see that he does have depression and self-loathing, to the point were he willing sacificed himself so Morty could live, see spop? This is how you make a complex character that people can feel sympathy for without excusing their actions, many people call Rick out and one of his oldest friends, Birdperson left because of his toxicity, and one of the people he loved Unity, left because he was a terrible influence and brought out the worst in them. You can show a character that is a horrible person and complex, to the point where you feel sympathy for them.
Also, we actively see Rick attempting to change, not just in a throwaway line about how he's working on his anger, and then it was never even mentioned again *cough* Catra *cough* We see in season 3 episode 2, he turned himself into a pickle so he can avoid family therapy, but in season 6 Analyze Piss and season 7 Air Force Wong, we can see that he's actively going to therapy every week, despite not even respecting it before, showing his growth. Another example is the Vat of Acid episode (That's literally what it's called) in season 4 episode 8, Rick got mad at Morty and conducted a way for Morty to be forced to support an idea Rick had that Morty didn't like when Morty tried to critique it, Rick imminently became defensive, in Full Meta Jackrick (Great episode btw) in season 6, episode 7, Rick admitted that he messed up when Morty critiqued him. In season 6 episode 10, we again see him admit that he made a mistake and that he should've included Morty instead of just shutting himself off.
The difference is one of them is well written, not shown as an innocent baby who did no wrong, and is actively trying to change with good character development, one is an abusive, toxic, catgirl who was imminetally forgiven and everybody got forgot her war crimes.
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wavesoutbeingtossed · 2 months
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Can I just say that as much as I'm usually talking into the void here, I'm so grateful for this community, even if I'm usually hanging out on the sidelines?
It's so nice to be able to come on here and write my silly little posts about the things Taylor's music makes me think about and to then have you wonderful people continue the discussion, or to read what you are all observing or analyzing and have my mind blown or chuckle or share in the joy or whatever.
For comparison, there are people who I used to love talking about this stuff with but over the years they've soured on Taylor (totally her prerogative) and we've stopped being able to have these discussions, because the nuance just goes out the window in the process. Like thinking Taylor was obsessive for writing as much as she did about JG because they were only together three months (when those of us who follow her realize it was more complicated than that), or insisting Midnights is a breakup album and the last year and a half of the relationship with Joe was fake going through the motions or fake and that they broke up way before tour (when... it's pretty damn obvious when it happened from the set list alone) and thinking TTPD is just going to be a diss album used to bury a helpless ex (...) or using the situation last May (ahem) as proof of her callousness or whatever, when again a more human answer is that she wasn't exactly thinking clearly and in The Pit in the wake of a life-changing upheaval etc. Or what really gets me, dismissing the Snakegate stuff as her being petty and holding onto grudges and ignoring the really intense mental and physical consequences that she dealt with for years afterwards.
Which is not to say this is all about her personal life, but that by being able to look at the music through a more nuanced lens instead of, like, taking it literally, for lack of better word, it colours in the lines and not only situates the music more in the context in which it was created, but also makes it feel richer to our own interpretations and associations with it. I LOVE when we all go back and find parallels with her other songs, and it's even more fun now because the mash-ups on stage show Taylor does the same thing with her own music! It's such a rich tapestry and we're in such a unique position as fans where an artist is reaching (if not has reached) living legend status in real time, while at an unprecedented level of creative output, and we get to digest the music and study it and watch it evolve before our eyes!
It's just really nice to have a space online where we *can* do that, because I feel like there just is nowhere else to really do that? It seems like people I know in real life either a) actively avoid her music (totally fair, not everyone's cup of tea) b) only care in terms of current pop culture value (also fair, although it gets annoying when it veers into TikTok brainrot into easter egging and shit instead of being about hte music) or c) obsessed with the Travis romance of it all. And I think most online spaces are kind of caught in these camps too. It's either unrelenting criticism (which is fine, not everyone has to like her and there are valid things to critique, even if I don't particularly care to myself) veering into hatred for the sake of hatred, or obsessing over her personal life to the point of dehumanizing her as a person and artist.
I know I'm being a cupcake but like, this is the cupcake website, so who cares. I use this space to delve into the shows and movies and music I love because there isn't anywhere else you can curate your experience as much as you can here. And when it comes to Taylor's music, I love that I can just spill my guts about what sets my brain on fire (affectionate) and the connections that emerge and just how much it makes me feel. And between the reblogs and comments and messages, it's slightly less lonely talking to everyone else too.
So, thank you friends! I don't know why I'm in my feels today but it seems like as good a time as any!
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I appreciate the counter-revisionist spirit of the Puritans but it doesn't fully acknowledge the bad with the good, right? The Puritans were genocidal towards Native Americans (during Metacomet's War), supported slavery, and then there's the brutal campaign in Ireland under Cromwell that ended with many poor Irish reduced to indentured servitude.
So I think this is a very fair critique. If I'm going to take the position that we have to acknowledge that tumblr's faves the Vikings and Caribbean pirates were heavily implicated in slavery, I think it's incumbent on me to recognize the intense violence that was also part of the Puritan legacy. Because I think there's a direct line that can be drawn towards the violence of King Metacomet's War, the violence of Cromwell's campaign in Ireland, the violence of the English Civil War, and the violence of the wars of religion on the European continent, in part because in some cases you literally had veterans of one conflict fighting in another, and also because I think it points to the ways in which these conflicts fit a rather conventional pattern of 17th century warfare. This is not to say that the Puritans' actions were moral, but rather that they weren't unusual.
First, these wars tended to involve targeted attacks on civilian populations, the tendency for both sides to engage in escalating reprisal atrocities (this is not meant as a minimization tactic: if you look at the actual conduct of these wars, there are no good guys as pretty much everyone gives into the temptation to massacre civilians in revenge), and high casualty rates.
Second, they tended to involve seizure of land and the simultaneous pushing out of existing inhabitants and intended settlement of co-ethnics/co-religionists. These wars were intended to reshape borders and frontiers in ways that we today would consider ethnic cleansing.
Third, they were also rather complicated conflicts. Metacomet's War wasn't just a Puritan attack on the Wampanoags, but a complex affair of the Puritans and nine different First Nations tribes who fought both for and against the Puritans and one another - indeed, arguably two of the biggest victors of Metacomet's War were the Mohawk and the Wabanaki. In Ireland, you had the Catholic Confederation who had originally rebelled against Charles I and warred against the largely Scottish Ulster Protestants but who also allied with Charles against first the rebellious Scottish Covenanters and then the English Parliamentarians, you had Scottish Covenenanters who sent armies into Ireland to protect and revenge their kinsmen, you had a Royalist army under the command of an Irish lord who was tasked with putting down the Confederation and then recruiting the Confederation, and then you had Cromwell's New Model Army. (This is why, for example, most of the victims of the massacre of Drogheda were English Royalist soldiers rather than Irish Catholic civilians.)
Finally, a couple points about slavery. First, it is true that slavery was practiced in Puritan New England, but unlike in Virginia, New England was a society with slaves rather than a slave society. Hence why you had odd scenarios, whereby in New England slaves had the right to jury trials - a loophole that enlaved people would exploit starting in the mid-18th century to launch freedom suits by which they would petition the court for manumission.
Second, I would strongly advise that you be very, very careful about the topic of Irish indentured servitude, because the "Irish slaves myth" discourse devolves very quickly into white supremacist propaganda, and there is a nasty tendency for Irish republicans to be extremely cavalier with racist tropes. For example, Sean O'Callaghan, the author of To Hell Or Barbados: The Ethnic Cleansing of Ireland not only conflated indentured servitude with chattel slavery, but invented a brand new historical libel when he claimed that Irish women sent to Barbados were systematically forcibly bred to African men. (Incidentally, for some misbegotten reason Wikipedia's page on the Cromwellian conquest of Ireland cites O'Callaghan as a source.) Despite the fact that this obviously trades in racist myths of black men as sexual predators, other authors repeated the claim and then it went viral online.
Not only is the conflation of temporary indentured servitude with chattel slavery something that a lot of white people use to minimize the history of anti-black racism similar to how narratives of immigrant struggles and upward mobility are used to minimize the impact of slavery and racism (essentially, we white ethnic group suffered and got over it, why can't you), but it also becomes this vector for online radicalization by white supremacists, neo-Nazis, and conspiracy theorists as memes circulate on social media forums - with the hope being that you gradually draw people from Facebook (and Tumblr?) to Infowars to Stormfront.
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