Back at the Barnyard quotes for no reason
Jean: Hey, folks! Viewer mail time again! *Opens a latter* Here’s one from Sally, age 14. “Dear Jean, aren’t you interrupting the story at the most suspenseful part?” Well, the answer is yes, Sally. Yes, I am. Keep those cards and letters coming!
—
Science Kids: *Dressed in burglary gear and relaxing on a massage chair when Jagged Stone suddenly walks in* Jagged Stone?!
Jagged Stone: Yeah, I’m Jagged Stone. What are you all doing in my house?
Science Kids: … Robbing it.
—
Simon: All rise! Court is now in session! The honorable Judge Marc presiding!
Marc: *Sits at the desk and immediately bangs the gavel* Guilty! Now let’s get to the punishment!
Alya: You haven’t heard any evidence yet!
Marc: I don’t need evidence! I can tell she did it by her beady little eyes!
Marinette: *Nervously shifting her eyes*
Marc: But, if you’re gonna make a big deal about it… Prosecutor, proceed!
—
Austin Q: Hey, Denise. Can I teach you the dance of love?
Denise: Is one of the steps my foot on your neck? ‘Cause there’s a dance I could really enjoy.
Austin Q: Ooh! Shot down! *Backs away*
—
Simon: Hm. I guess stupid is contagious.
—
Cosette: We gotta ditch the body! He knows too much! We gotta take care of him!… We gotta whack him.
Aurore: There will be no whacking! Okay, Ivan’s a good guy.
Mireille: And he’s a vegan. God bless him.
Ismael: And, uh… What’s a vegan again?
Lacey: Ah, I got it. It means you can’t eat anything with a face.
Jean: No, no, that’s a vegetarian.
Cosette: I think vegetarians have to eat in the dark.
Reshma: That’s vampires.
Lacey: And, you can’t eat cheese?
Reshma: It’s not just cheese. Vegans can’t have any dairy products.
*Aurore silently freaks out when she notices Ivan starting to wake up, but the others are oblivious*
Denise: Cake has egg products.
Simon: But you can’t have any dairy.
Ismael: Aw, but I love dairy! Does that mean I can’t be a vegan?
Marc: I love the smell of bacon! There, I said it!
*Ivan wakes up, and the students gasp*
Ivan: Huh? What’s- *Denise kicks him in the head, effectively knocking him out*
Aurore: WOULD YOU NOT DO THAT?!
Denise: It’s not like we have a lot of options.
—
Aurore: We gotta snap him out of this. Okay, Jean’s family. He’s like the crazy uncle we never had.
Cosette: Uh… Right… I never had a crazy uncle…
*Flashback*
*Five year old Cosette is listening to their crazy uncle speak utter nonsense*
Crazy Uncle: The Easter bunny has betrayed me! We’ll have to close the beaches! You can’t close the beaches, we’re a summer town! Get these turtles outta my head, PLEASE! Aaand, linge! *Starts line dancing while scatting* Dah Dah! Yah Doo! Dah Dah!
*End flashback*
Cosette: *Shudders*
—
Denise: *As four Akumas stalk toward them* Well, well. Whatever will I do? *Drop kicks all of them without moving from their spot*
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Kim: I prechewed it so you wouldn't waste jaw energy.
Adrien: ... So the sandwich in my mouth was previously in your mouth?
Kim: Nice taste, eh?
—
Adrien: Hey, anybody ever notice that Ladybug and Marinette are never together at the same time?
Alya: You're really 31 flavors of dumb, aren't you?
—
Shadow Moth: Hey! Who's there?
Ladybug: Your worst nightmare.
Chat Noir: And Chat Noir!
—
Austin A: No, I don't wanna get eaten, I'm too young! Too young!
Austin B: Dude, you're not gonna get eaten.
Austin A: What, you're saying I wouldn't go nice with some low-fat chips and a cherry cola?
—
Ismael: *To Bubbler* You got rid of the only people standing between us and shallow graves so we can celebrate the day this guy *Points to Adrien* came into the Earth?
—
Nathaniel: *Whispering* Whatever you do, do not eat the... *everyone runs and eats Louis' mini pizzas* ... All right. I guess they're all right.
Louis: I hope you like them. I made them with love... and flaming hot chili sauce! *All of the students start screaming as they try to cool their tongues down*
Marc: *Completely calm and eating another mini pizza* Man, you guys are lightweights.
—
Aurore: I don't buy it. There's no way Marinette pushed Lila down the stairs. Come on, let's go solve the case of the pushed Italian.
Denise: I don't know, Aurore. That's really going to cut into my weight-lifting time.
Aurore: I'll bring snacks.
Denise: I'm in!
—
Alix: *After Louis leaves* He's gone, but you can still smell the stupid.
—
Alix: Hey, what did you use in that energy drink?
Marinette: Milk.
Max: Vitamins.
Rose: Love.
Alix: And...?
Kim: And these pepper shakers. *Holds up a stick of dynamite*
Alix: That's not pepper, that's dynamite!
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