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aphrodisiac-siren · 1 year

Text

Innocence- Aemond X OC

Summary: War is an ugly thing; Something that is common knowledge to all and yet something people resort to anyway when conflicts arise. It was not something Eirlys Velaryon wanted though, nor what Aemond Targaryen wanted as well. It was a war they were dragged into, and suffering they had to endure for crimes they were innocent of.

Warnings: Smut [18+ minors DNI]

Masterlist

Part 7

"Are you quiet certain you don't want me to accompany you?" Aemond asked once again as he lazily sprawled himself on Eirlys' bed while she packed a few of her essentials. He'd offered to help but made no effort to do so as of yet "at the very least only until you're within a few leagues away from the castle"

"Yes I am certain ñuha prūmia" (my heart) Eirlys sighed as she assured him yet again for the fifth time that evening "I'm not flying to war, I'm simply making a short trip to visit my family"

"Your valerian has improved I see" the prince grinned at her and the term she'd used to address him with "nyke kessa bardugon naejot ao tolvie tubis" (I shall write to you every day)

"hae kessa nyke" (as will I) Eirlys smiled. She figured Aemond was only jesting while she was in truth being serious about writing to him, just as a form of assurance that she had reached Dragonstone safely.

"We're going to be wed soon" Aemond simply stated.

"We are" Eirlys replied.

"Are you done packing your things?" The boy asked as he leaned back into the softness of the pillows "come lie here with me"

"It would get done a lot faster if you actually helped, like how you said you would" the princess muttered in annoyance as she put away another one of her many dresses "all you've been doing is eating my ear off"

"Something else you'd like me to eat then?" Aemond inquired with a smirk as he propped himself up by his elbows to glance at Eirlys "tell me what other use I could put my mouth to"

"You're disgusting" the younger girl laughed as she reached for a cushion and flung it at him which Aemond effortlessly caught with one hand without flinching.

"Oh am I now?" He raised a brow as he placed the cushion beside himself "wasn't disgusting last night when I was in between your legs, now was I princess?"

"Alright I've had enough of you" The girl rose to her feet and marched around the bed to get to him. She held his hand and began to tug "get out"

"A-Aemond please" he mimicked her moaning and burst into a fit of laughter, looking at her with an amused expression while she struggled to pull him off the bed "yes, right there"

"Shut up" Eirlys tried to stop herself from joining him in laughter "you are the absolute worst. Perhaps I should moan someone else's name then"

"You can try it jorrāelagon (love) but I assure you, you will find the man's head who's name you dared to moan in my presence, mounted on a spike the very next morning" Aemond's signature smirk still danced on his lips but his tone was far from jovial. No, he was being serious "and then I'd fuck you senseless until the only name you can remember is mine"

"If you helped as much as you talk, I might've let you spend the night in my chambers" Eirlys taunted as she let go of his hands, knowing well enough she could not overpower him before she went and bolted the door and headed back toward the trunks she was preparing for her journey.

"Why'd you bolt the door?" Aemond asked as he sat up, still in no hopes of actually helping; shameless.

Eirlys did not respond. She simply undid the front of her dress to loosen it and then got herself rid of it before retiring her underskirts as well until she was completely naked.

Aemond was suddenly very interested in where this was headed.

He quickly got to his feet and walked toward her but Eirlys took a step back before he'd even reached her.

"You don't get to touch me until I've finished packing all my things" she smiled smugly at him "the sooner I'm done, the sooner you can take me so I suggest you quit ogling and start helping"

Aemond muttered a few profanities under his breath before he begrudgingly joined her in folding clothes, wrapping a few shoes and boxing a few pieces of jewellery and then putting them into either of the two trunks, neatly.

Eirlys was making things rather difficult for him. He noted her leaning to retrieve things that were closest to him, occasionally squeezing one of her breasts. Sometimes even whimpering softly while she brushed her fingers against her core.

However, when they were finally done packing, she slipped into one of her nightgowns and proceeded to torment him further by telling him she did not wish to entertain him tonight.

Aemond of course, would never force her to do something if she did not wish for it but he could quiet clearly see that she was only doing this to agonise him further.

He seized her by the waist, lifting her up quiet easily, before bringing her to the bed and crawling on top of her.

He once again, did not prolong his time on her neck or any other areas where the bruises might be visible. And now out of all times would be the worst considering she was on her way to see her parents and brothers.

He couldn't deny that he wanted to leaves a few marks on her neck, simply to enrage her brothers Jace and Luke but he also remembered that her step father Daemon would be the first one at his door with a sword in hand.

He impatiently ripped the dress, earning a scowl from the princess.

"Aemond-" she gasped before her face contoured into an expression of pure annoyance "you ripped my dress-"

"I can have five more made for each one I rip" he grinned down at her chest, still covered with his love bites "gods you are beautiful"

He wasted absolutely no time in devouring her and this time Eirlys made sure to keep her voice down each time she moaned.

"You're still dressed" the girl managed to say while Aemond held her legs firmly apart and tongue fucked her.

"I know" he simply mumbled, still sucking on her clit.

"Take them off" Eirlys entangled her fingers in his hair "now"

Aemond obliged. He would listen to almost anything she had to say.

Eirlys felt the blood rush to her cheeks when she saw his hard member that she hadn't seen properly yet since he was handling himself while she was sat atop a table the last time.

Aemond once again got on his knees but Eirlys stopped him.

"I- I want to please you" she meekly told him as she rose up from the bed and stood before him "but you'll have to guide me"

Aemond's heart clenched at how she looked up at him so innocently. He forgot how not-so-innocently she was taunting him only moments ago. Right now all he could see was his sweet Eirlys tenderly looking up at him with no lust but pure longing for him.

Aemond sat down at the edge of the bed with his legs spread open while Eirlys got on her knees in between them. The sight along of her meekly looking up at him with his small, delicate hands resting gently on his thighs, was enough to drive him insane.

He reached down to take one of her hands in his to guide to his throbbing cock.

"Wrap your fingers around" he instructed in a soft, tender voice; afraid that if he spoke any louder he would frighten her "now glide your hand up and down my length, slowly at first"

He let go of her hand and let her do it herself. She was nervous, he could tell so he did not make her anymore anxious by staring down at her. He simply leaned back and gazed at the ceiling while he enjoyed the sensation of her pumping him.

"You can lick the tip, and along my shaft too if yo- oh" he bit his lip the moment her tongue made contact with the head of his member.

She licked the head first before dragging her tongue from the base of his shaft all the way back up before swirling her tongue around the head, tasting his pre cum.

"Did I do it right?" She nervously asked to which Aemond responded with a hum and then laced his fingers with her free hand.

"Eirlys" he breathed out "take me in your mouth, as much as you can and then suck"

The girl took a moment to look at his length. There was no way she would be able to take all of him. She hesitantly placed her lips on the head of his cock, taking him little by little and stroking the rest of him with her hand.

It took a few minutes for her to get used to it and to set a pace.

Aemond could feel himself getting lost to the sensation. How long he'd craved for this, for her.

His other hand went to gently fist her platinum hair while he ever so slightly tightened his grip on the hand that he'd interlaced his fingers with her's.

Aemond shut his eye tightly as he bit his lip and fought back the moans that got caught up in his throat.

Eirlys mistook his silence for something else entirely, not being able to see how desperately he was holding himself back.

"Am I doing something wrong?" She asked, fearing that she was doing a terrible job. The last thing she wanted was not being able to satisfy him.

"N-no don't stop" Aemond whimpered "you feel amazing"

Aemond's hips rose from the bed, pushing himself a little more into her mouth as he felt himself getting closer with each second that passed.

"Eirlys" he moaned softly as he threw his head back, his chest heaving while he anticipated for that wave of bliss to wash over "I, I'm so close"

He thought she might pull back, only using her hand to help relieve himself but she kept sucking him off, bobbing her head up and down his shaft.

Aemond's mind went blank and his senses dulled as he felt the familiar sensation of sparks shooting through the entirety of his body.

Hot ribbons of white shot out of him and into Eirlys' mouth that caught her by surprise at first but she swallowed nonetheless, taking a moment to get herself accustomed to the salty taste.

Aemond was a mess. His throat felt dry and his chest glistened with sweat while he continued to pant.

Eirlys used the back of her hand to wipe the bit of his semen at the corner of her lips before climbing into bed with him.

"Did I do okay?" She asked, hoping that she was able to satisfy him the same way he'd satisfied her.

"You were more than okay jorrāelagon" (love) he wrapped and arm around her and pulled her close before pressing a kiss to her forehead "I don't feel like letting you go all the more after this"

The flight to Dragonstone was indeed a short one.

Aemond made quiet a fuss the morning of the departure, peppering Eirlys with kisses before she left her chambers.

It would be her name day a few days after her return back to the Red Keep and he kept reminding her to not prolong her stay since it had turned into quiet a ritual for them to celebrate their name days with each other. Aemond knew it was selfish, to ask her to spend her birthday with him instead of her brothers; especially since she was seeing them after years. But he did not care for them, Eirlys was his and his alone and if that made them hate him even more, so be it.

Besides, it was not their love he was after. It was their sister who his heart belonged to.

It was no secret that the prince had grown rather too attached to the princess but the extent of this attachment became very clear to her that day and in turn revealed to her that Aemond Targaryen would be a very protective yet needy husband.

The one-eyed prince kept his composure once he was within the company of other nobles at court, sending off his beloved wife-to-be with a lingering kiss to the hand and a smile.

As much as he wanted to seize her by the waist and kiss her senseless, him and her both knew that such a desperate display of affection would only create more gossip and not the good kind. Aemond didn't care, he took no offence and bore no shame when it came to showing his love to his beloved but he knew such bold gestures would only speculate rumours within the narrow minded people at court and put to question their virtues. They were both royalty in their youth, and it wouldn't be a complete surprise if it were rumoured that they both had humped one another several times. Why else would there be such affection between two people who were in an arranged marriage?

Small minded people indeed.

Ember had been spotted from afar from one of the guards at the watchtower of Dragonstone. The men weren't able to identify the dragon but Daemon, who had already marched toward the narrow bridge that served as the entrance of the castle, knew at once it was Eirlys and her dragon, and asked one of the guards to inform Rhaenyra; thus alerting the princess of her daughter's unannounced arrival to their home.

Rhaenyra did not care that she was not dressed in one of her finer dresses, she was simply in an excited rush to see her daughter after all these years. Jace and Luke too did not bother to change out of their messy clothes that were a bit muddy due to their training.

They all rushed to the entrance while Ember took his time to make his descent, circling the grounds a few times before gliding down toward the gates.

Rhaenyra smiled when she saw her daughter from a distance, who was eagerly undoing the chains of her saddle.

Her hair was long but she had it styles in soft curls, much similar to how Alicent wore her hair. Even though she did have a few braids incorporated into the style, Rhaenyra could tell that the queen had a minor influence on how Eirlys presented herself.

Eirlys wore a coral blue dress, to signify her being a Velaryon princess. Yet a few minor accents were of sage green, a symbolism of her union with the prince Aemond, who wore the colours of his mother's preference: Green.

Eirlys effortlessly got down from the saddle atop her dragon. She gently rubbed the scaly neck of Ember, muttering something to him that the others could not hear because of the distance but it seemed to put her grumpy dragon a good mood, who made it noticeable by making a low rumbling noise and nudging his head to her belly.

With one last pat to the Dragons's head, Eirlys made her way toward her family.

Rhaenyra was the first from the lot to step forward, arms outstretched and a warm smile to greet her beloved and only daughter.

Eirlys wasted no time in breaking into a run, her silvery hair flying with the wind behind her before she was engulfed into her mother's embrace.

"You look beautiful my darling" Rhaenyra kissed the girl's forehead "oh how I've missed being able to hold you"

Daemon was right by his wife's side, who greeted the girl with another hug; a shorter one, but warm nonetheless.

"You are the very image of your mother" he smiled as he pulled away to look at the girl "they shall sing songs of your beauty"

"You flatter me, step-father" Eirlys smiled at the compliment "though I am no match for my mother's ethereal beauty"

"The scrolls will certainly record how you reak of dragon"

Eirlys rolled her eyes at her brother's comment.

"Well I can now say without guilt that I did not miss you Jace" The girl smiled before she hugged her brother who simply chuckled in response.

"Luke? My! what a handsome young lad you've become" Eirlys' smile grew even more as her eyes landed on one of her younger brothers "and dear gods, you've grown taller! Almost as tall as myself"

It was true, Lucerys had infact reached almost the same height as her, a few more years and he would indefinitely outgrow her.

The boy simply smiled at her, abashed. He let the girl playfully ruffle his brown curls before she hugged him.

"Joffrey my love" Eirlys wrapped her arms around the youngest as she bent on her knees to be on the same level as him, not caring about her dress being ruined "I've missed you so, look at how much you've grown, why you're nearly man enough to wield a sword"

"Rather clear who's her favourite" Jace muttered, earning a chuckle from Luke and Joffrey sticking out his tongue at them as a taunt.

"What brings you to Dragonstone, my dearest" Rhaenyra asked as she gently tucked a few strands of hair behind Eirlys' ear.

"Have the greens finally managed to bore you senseless" Daemon snickered "if this is about you wanting to dissolve the engagement with the one-eyed prince, just say the word and consider it done"

"It's actually quite the opposite" the girl put on a smile, despite the obvious hatred Daemon exhibited toward her betrothed. She'd just visited her family for the first time in years and did not wish to commence an argument "shall we head inside? I am rather tired"

"Of course" Rhaenyra ushered toward the gates "I shall have the servants prepare a warm bath for you. We shall have a feast tonight to welcome my daughter back"

The bath was rather refreshing.

Eirlys scrubbed at her skin, gently, to wash away the smell of smoke and dragon.

The oils provided here were a complete contrast to the ones she used at King's landing.

While she usually used ones that had hints of sweet florals or fruit, here she was given ones that gave off a gentle yet spicy fragrance like viburnum, mint and cloves.

She picked a maroon dress for dinner, to match with her mother who she'd seen wearing a red gown only moments after she finished bathing.

She wore her hair down but braided two locks of her hair on either side with a black ribbon and then tied them both at the back of her head, giving it the illusion of a braided crown.

For her jewellery, she scanned through one of her many expensive and intricate necklaces for she was known to take after her mother and prefer the choice of the more finer and precious jewels that her darling Aemond was well aware of. In fact, most of her jewellery were gifts from the prince, a token of his ever growing love for her.

She picked a gold necklace that had a small yet detailed head of a dragon for a pendant. In its mouth was an even smaller gem that was as blue as the sapphire Aemond wore, another symbol of their courtship.

She slipped on a ring made from valerian steel. It resembled twine twisting around to form a loop with three small diamonds placed randomly that represented her three brothers: Jace, Luke and Joffrey. A gift from her Mother on her two and tenth name day.

Once she was happy with her appearance, she walked toward the dining room, escorted by one of the guards.

The numerous candles lit provided a dim yet warm and welcoming ambience.

"Evening sister" Jace pulled out a chair for her "allow me"

Quiet the gentleman.

Jace returned the smile his sister gave, that was quiet similar to his mother's. He was slightly envious of her, how she had been blessed with their mother's looks as opposed him him and his brothers who took after their father.

Their true father.

Though one thing did make her stand out just like the rest of them, granted hers was not as obvious.

Her eyes.

Her eyes glowed like the brightest of flames when the fires of the room shone against them just right.

She did not have her mother's bluish-lilac eyes that most Targaryens had.

No. She, like the rest of them, had her father's brown eyes.

And yet not once did that ever make her question her legitimacy. Why would she? She had never been ridiculed at court like the rest of them.

Besides, the king had once told everyone it was the Baratheon blood in her that blessed her with those doe-like eyes.

He'd said the same for the boys upon seeing their appearance. But the lords and ladies at court found it much easier to believe Eirlys' legitimacy over theirs because of how loudly their appearance resembled that of the late lord Strong.

His envy never managed to overpower his love for her though, she was his little sister.

His little snowdrop that he would protect with his life.

There was almost nothing she could do or say that could ever make the prince turn against her.

"Does our uncle give you a hard time?" Luke asked as he took his seat beside his older sister.

"Prince Aemond is one of my closest friends at court" Eirlys beamed at the boy "he doesn't do anything that might hurt me"

Lies.

He had done, once. But that was water under the bridge.

"Of course he doesn't torment her" Jace switched glances from Eirlys to Luke "that side of his is reserved only for the both of us"

"Why does he hate you boys so?" Joffrey asked innocently, not knowing that he too was on Aemond's list of nuisances.

"He dislikes us because he believes mere rumours he once heard" Jace smiled as he came up with a quick response "you needn't take anything he says to heart"

"You're lucky you take after mother and not father" Luke muttered under his breath so that Joffrey might not hear.

"Luke!" Jace scolded.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Eirlys asked cluelessly "our father Laenor was quiet charming"

"No that's not-"

"That is enough" Jace interrupted sternly. It was best that Eirlys didn't know. Knowledge of such would only complicate things further.

"Did I miss something?" Eirlys turned to Jace with a playful smile "have we grown apart so much that I can't be let in on a few secrets?"

"No of course not" The older boy assured "it's just Luke being mean. Lucerys, do not talk about father that way. Eirlys is right, Laenor was indeed a handsome man"

Luke rolled his eyes at his brother's attempt at forming a quick cover up. Jace was quiet the actor and quick to come up with solutions to escape a situation.

Though his farce did not fool his sister. These boys were her blood, she could quiet easily tell Luke had begun something that was a delicate matter, at least for Jace.

She did not bring it up since her mother and Daemon walked in to begin with their dinner. But she would question them about it later.

"So" Rhaenyra took a sip of her wine "do tell, my dearest, what has brought you back home to me? It must be rather important if you decided to fly here yourself"

"Perhaps she fled the city" Luke jested "living with those vipers must've been torturous"

Daemon laughed at this but Rhaenyra and Eirlys simply rolled their eyes.

Like mother, like daughter.

"I came to announce to you all about my wedding to prince Aemond" she told them as a smile crept to her face "it is to happen on the evening of the new moon"

"So soon?" Daemon tilted his head as he looked at her with confusion "seems sudden"

"It does, yes" Eirlys admitted "but the queen sees no more reason to prolong the engagement. And I too am more than eager to be wed"

Jace and Luke shared judgmental glances discreetly. It was no secret that the boys did not like her betrothed. Why would they when he addressed them by the term 'bastards' instead of their own names.

"I would be more than delighted if mother would accompany me back to King's landing to help with the wedding preparations" she turned to look at her mother with a hopeful expression "the queen offered to help with my wedding gown earlier but I declined and requested to design it with the presence and guidance of my mother as well"

Rhaenyra beamed with pride at her daughter.

"Of course my sweetheart" she answered with that smile still dancing on her lips "I would be delighted to help with anything you may need assistance with"

"I assume you will be wed in the sept then?" Daemon asked.

"She did wish for us to exchange vows in the sept, yes, but I made another request" the girl told him "I informed her of my desire to honour tradition and have an authentic valerian ceremony of exchanging marriage vows"

Daemon too was now sat there with a proud smile similar to Rhaenyra's.

"Should've made another request to exchange your husband for a better one" Jace muttered, proceeding to make a light hearted joke "or at the very least a complete one"

"Jace" his mother's tone was sharp, almost like a warning "your sister just announced her marriage, be nice"

"Aemond is not the same boy you once tormented" Eirlys sternly told them, subtly hinting that they too were to blame for the way he spoke to them "I agree he hurled treasonous insults but all of that is in the past. He paid the price with his eye. He is a man changed and the man who I am to take as my lord husband, I urge you to keep that in mind before you say anything against him"

Everyone at the table grew momentarily silent.

They had never heard Eirlys speak so sharply and least of all as defence against Aemond.

They all got the warning.

Eirlys was not the same girl she once was.

She would not stand an ill word against her betrothed.

The rest of the evening was a lot better even though it got off to an awkward start.

They exchanged stories and filled her in on things she'd missed out on over the years and she did the same.

By the time dinner ended and she was back in the chamber of her own, she began to write her letter to Aemond, letting him know that she had reached her family safely and that the news of their marriage was taken in with great joy, for the most part.

She rolled the parchment into a scroll after she'd signed her name and sealed it with her own emblem: a snowflake.

After sending it off with a raven, she headed to bed.

She was aware the letter would reach Aemond within a few hours time and knowing him, he would write one back as soon he'd received her's; which would most likely arrive on the morrow.

With the thought of waking up to a letter from her sweet prince, Eirlys let sleep take over her as she rest her head on the pillow after such a long and eventful day.

It had been three days.

Well, three days and sixteen hours to be specific.

Not that he was keeping track of it in his notebook.

But Aemond was starting to grow concerned.

In the span of these 'three' days, he'd written almost seven letter to Eirlys and not a single one was responded to.

He didn't think much of it when she didn't respond to his first or second one, she must've been so tired after her journey and then busy with her family.

But in his last two letters he had mentioned his worry and requested for a reply, even if it was a small piece ripped form a large parchment with nothing but her initials sighed in a corner.

But nothing.

No response.

He thought perhaps her family did not approve of their marriage and had maybe asked her to stay with them at Dragonstone permanently. But she had mentioned in her first and only letter they took the news rather joyously, so what could possibly be the reason behind her silence?

Another day passed.

And another.

Until it was finally the day he has been awaiting ever since he'd waved goodbye to Eirlys as she soared away from the Red Keep, above the city and into the clouds.

His beloved was returning to him again.

"You are like a puppy, you know that?" Aegon commented as he stood beside Aemond who awaited with anticipation for the arrival of the princess and her mother "a needy puppy who can't go on a single day without his master"

"Another word and I will have Ember burn you to crisp" Aemond casually stated as he held both his arms behind him. His shoulders were pushed back and his posture was upright. Aemond carried himself with a certain poise and gave off a dark and dominant aura that demanded respect from everyone who set their sights on him.

If his confident body language did not do the job, his intimidating stare did it for him.

This was something even Daeron looked up to and incorporated.

Meanwhile all Aegon cared about was drinking and sleeping; with random women most of the time.

Helaena, with her queen mother Alicent and her father and her husband the king too, were present.

Viserys still felt weak with his growing illness but he wished to be present to welcome his beloved daughter and his sweet granddaughter.

The sounds of the dragons screeching reached them before the sight of the dragons did.

The majestic winged beasts made themselves visible in their own time, slowly descending from the clouds and nearer to the castle grounds.

Rhaenyra was the first to dismount her dragon, Eirlys took her time undoing her chains.

Each of them greeted the princess Rhaenyra with a slight incline of the head, as a form of paying their respects which she also returned with the same gesture.

Aemond was more eager to see Eirlys than his half sister and he shamelessly marched away from his family and walked toward her, extending his hand to help her off the saddle, that she took.

"I have missed you dearly" he looked down at her fondly.

"As did I my prince" she replied with a smile, yet not looking up to face him.

Aemond looked at her confused, none of the nobles from court were present. Why was she addressing him so formally? Perhaps she hadn't taken notice of it yet.

"It is just us, jorrāelagon" (love) he looked at her with a playful smirk whilst assuring her that it was only him and his family present "you may discard the use of such formalities-"

"I am rather tired" she told him as he walked her back to greet the rest of his family "forgive me but I need to retire to my chambers and indulge in a bath"

And with that she left him to say her hello's to the others before she made her way to her chambers at court.

Aemond was so lost as to what had happened.

Why was she being so distant? And with the day of their wedding nearing. Perhaps it was just nerves?

He would not let whatever he fought for, quiet literally, wither away so quickly.

Rhaenyra did not speak much with her step-siblings, most of her conversations were with Alicent and her father Viserys. Though Aemond and his siblings stood there with their father, mother and grandfather, a polite gesture.

The prince marched to Eirlys' chambers soon after his family had dispersed and the dragons were taken to the pit.

In truth he wanted to desperately talk to Eirlys as soon as she walked away from the others but he remained stood alongside his mother only because Eirlys had informed him she wished to bathe first.

He knocked twice and awaited her permission, which came after an interval of a few seconds.

He swiftly opened the door and walked in, taking long strides toward her.

"What's wrong?" She asked when she saw the expression he wore; a mix between concern and hurt. Her eyes darted away as quickly as they'd turned to examine him, not wishing to hold eye contact.

"That's a question I ought to ask you" he simply told her, his voice sounding a lot harsher than he intended "what's wrong?"

"Nothing I-"

"You're being so distant and it took barely a few words for me to notice something is off" he told her as he took a step closer, suddenly feeling so far away from her even though she was within arms reach "you refuse to call me by my name Eirlys! It was you who said I am your closest friend before I am your betrothed"

"I am aware" she briskly responded, unsure if she should let her disappointment show or if she should maintain her calm composure.

She wanted to tell him everything but she would not let him have the satisfaction of knowing that his negligence of her while she was away had such an effect.

That along with a certain conversation she had with her brothers had put her through quiet a spiral of emotions.

"What's gotten into you?" He finally snapped, his voice on the danger of cracking. Aemond didn't know the last time he'd cried and he certainly did not want to break down now "you don't look at me, you don't say my name, you didn't even respond to any of my letters!"

"You wrote me letters?" Eirlys finally raised her head to meet his gaze.

Her eyes softened when she looked into his, it carried such sorrow that it made her heart clench at the sight. She did not wish to be the reason behind her beloved's sadness. But at the same time, he was also the reason behind hers, again.

"I did" he sadly replied "y-you never..."

"I never received any" it was her who took a step toward him this time. Days worth of sorrow and anger vanished in a matter of seconds when Aemond told her that he did write to her "in fact it was I who wrote to you numerous times"

"I only ever received one of your letters, the one you sent on the very night you reached Dragonstone" he told her "I wrote back to you soon after, seven times"

The both of them were so confused as to how neither of their letters made it to them. Did the birds fly astray? It would be an odd occurrence for it to happen for each letter that was sent.

But who would benefit from breaking their union?

No other lord in the realm had ever approached Eirlys with the intention of courting her. Neither did any lady make advances on Aemond with hopes of being his lady wife.

An odd occurrence indeed.

One thing was clear, this couldn't be something that happened by chance.

"I was afraid you would not return" the prince sighed as he reached out to hold her hands in his "i thought that perhaps you..."

"Shh" she went up on her toes to rest her forehead against his.

She did not want to talk further about something that had put them through complete misery in the last few days. She simply wanted to be with him. To feel his presence.

To some this might seem so silly. But this was their first time being apart.

Never in their lives had they spent a single day apart so for them suddenly to be away from each other for a little less than a week, when their days since childhood revolved around each other, was rather difficult for the both of them.

She was relieved that he did not forget her or resort to ignore her and the letters she wrote. Thought it did upset her. The misplacement of the letters had put her in a rather horrible mood in the past couple of days.

She couldn't deny that it did cross her mind that perhaps Aemond had resorted to following Aegon's ways with regards to tending to his sexual urges.

A fleeting thought that she pushed away the moment it came.

Aemond would never. He had promised.

A gentle smile graced her lips when she felt Aemond welcoming her into an embrace as his toned arms wrapped around her smaller frame, pulling her cautiously closer to him.

He smelled of green apple with a hint of charred sandalwood. His smell accompanied by the sound of the crackling fire in her cozy room felt like home.

He was her home,

Her heart,

Everything.

"Change of oils" Aemond softly mumbled as he placed a kiss atop her head that he then rested his chin on "you smell different"

"Do you not like it?" Eirlys asked, knowing well that he, in fact, did.

She had carried with her some of the oils that her mother used to give her at their castle, suddenly rather fond of the spicy scented ones over the sweet ones here at court.

Dianthus and lemon balm is the one she'd picked to bathe in to drive away the smell that lingered after a dragon ride that went on for too long.

"It's a nice change" he rocked her gently "very sultry"

Eirlys responded with a soft 'hmm', a habit she'd picked up from Aemond himself. They once again embraced the comfortable silence. It offered some solace from the busy life at court.

"I love you Aemond" Eirlys interrupted the quietness of the room as she pulled back slightly just to look up at him.

After days of feeling her absence, it felt reliving to hear her say his name whilst in the security of his arms. Arms that he'd wielded the sharpest of swords with. With which he would kill for her.

He looked down at her and then a single tear rolled down his cheek, then another, and another.

Aemond never let his emotions out. He was the one who bottled it all up and never let anything show on the surface.

But with Eirlys he'd felt a sort of calm wash over him. It gave him a sense of belongingness, a blanket of safety, like you'd feel within your home.

She was his home.

He didn't know what he felt in that moment.

Relaxed?

Relieved?

Happy?

The girl's expression quickly turned into one of concern as she reached up to gently wipe away the tears.

"What's the matter?" She asked.

Aemond smiled for the first time in days as he sniffled.

"I love you"

Taglist: @beiigegalx

#aemond targaryen #ewan mitchell #ewan nation #hotd #house of the dragon #tom bennett #world on fire #aemond #aemond smut #aemond x you #aemond headcanons #aemond x fem!reader #aemond x y/n #daemon targaryen #daemon smut #aegon targaryen #aegon smut

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wisteria-lodge · 1 year

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For some reason, very few writing posts are about dialog. Like are you supposed to be naturally good at it, or just figure it out? Anyway, here are some tips that have been useful for me. (All examples come from the front page of A03, but the point is not to embarrass anyone. There is nothing seriously wrong with any of these.)

"I have work to do Leo. We need to find Mikey." Donnie responded, not looking over at Leo.

New writers love to put character names in dialog. And try it sometime, actually say the name of the person you're talking to as you're talking to them. It's very intense, often kind of aggressive ("Clean your room, Leo.") When it does happen, it's usually a way to underline what kind of relationship you have with the person you're talking to. ("I'm sorry, Master Splinter." = I respect you, and see you as an authority figure.") ("We're cool right, Red?" = I want you to know you're someone I feel emotionally close to.)

Regulus groaned. "This will be fun."

“Reggie! Truth or dare?” Lupin asked

“Dare, Rems,” Regulus replied. No one else called him Reggie.

The nicknames get across a lot more meaning/utility/character development than just straight-up names would, so points. But my thing is, don't torture yourself. Just use "said." It's fine. It's a super common invisible word. You can't overuse "said" the same way you can't overuse "that." It honestly takes you out of it more if characters spend a whole fic "responding" or "observing" or "answering."

"Harvey, I wasn't flirting, I was just socializing. You know how much I love meeting and talking to people, men or not. You are the only one I ever wanted and you know that."

This is an example of 'on-the-nose' dialog. Even though the character is in a kind of intense situation, they're laying out exactly what they want to say very clearly, something people are are generally pretty bad at.

You can pack a lot of character development into a moment like this. This person has just been accused of flirting when they weren't - so does that make them angry? defensive? confused? let down? apologetic? scared? playful?

Movie dialog can get away with being more on-the-nose, because a good actor can bring all those different kinds of subtext to the same line. Like this bit from Revenge of the Sith:

OBI-WAN: Anakin, Chancellor Palpatine is evil!

ANAKIN: From my point of view the Jedi are evil!

Not "What do you know?" or "The Jedi threatened him!" or "He's given me more than the you ever have!" Just a very straightforward 'Well, from Anakin's point of view the jedi are evil, so why doesn't he just say that.'

But Hayden Christensen is a good enough actor to sell the line- he takes the slightly formal phrase "From my point of view" and delivers it in a way that sounds automatic, like maybe this is something he's been taught to say. I could believe that "From my point of view" is a phrase Obi-Wan has given him to use in arguments, and he's bringing it out here because they still have a teacher/student dynamic, and he's desperately hoping that somehow Obi-Wan might still be willing to listen. Imagine if once or twice in the previous films we had an exchange like "Anakin! What were you doing with those chance cubes!" "From my point of view, I was making it easier for the other customers to come up and talk to me," and then got hit with that exchange in the final movie.

"Turning yourself in frankly diffused a very unstable situation, and saved both sides a lot of trouble and probably some lives, and well... I thought I owed you that much."

This is a good example of a speaking quirk (I'm going though a few characters, all from the same fic.) Notice the code-switching. The character starts off very professional before becoming casual - they say "a lot of trouble" when they could have said "significant expense and effort" - which would be more of a match to "diffused a very unstable situation." So either they're getting comfortable with the person they're talking to, trying to make that person feel more comfortable, or else their professional mask is slipping for some reason

"Are you trying to paint yourself an honest thief? Ha!"

That "Ha!" is so nice because it's like... a little lame? But I totally buy that no one is actually going to tell this character that, because he's powerful. Great for a slightly funny sub-villain.

"I gotta tell you about all the new jobs here! There's like, so many openings at the mines and in the factories!"

You don't even need to tell me this is a young character. That "like" does all the work for you.

"You want me to actively help you lot? Ha! What the fuck makes you think I'd ever do that?"

I like the combination of the precise and slightly technical "actively help" with the intense and in-your-face "fuck" and "you lot." There's a duality to this character. Like maybe they can code switch into 'expert' but choose not to. Intriguing.

Basically, you can have so much fun with a character swearing (or not), being formal (or not) using unusual words from their job or background, running scripts, talking too little, repeating themselves, having large or small vocabularies, phrasing everything as a question (or nothing as a question.) Gender, age, education level, location, background, profession, level of social prestige absolutely affect word choice and how characters talk... and if they're a robot, alien, angel, whatever - that's just an excuse to get even more stylized. (Heck, even over-using character names in dialog is a great speaking quirk for one specific character that you want to feel slightly intense/over-formal/other)

#dialog #writing tools #writing stuff #dialog writing #nanowriting #code switching #language stuff #on the nose dialog

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sjhanny2000 · 2 years

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Hair Care Frustrations

I have an answer to the ask from @summerofsleep here:

Hello, it's me again. Thank you so much for responding!

Since you write for Naruto, could you do Naruto boys with an s/o that has really long hair (Kushinas hair length for example), and what they would do if their hair was stressing them out (getting in the way during training, during jobs, hot nights in summer, etc)

AGAIN THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR RESPONDING!!

For now, I'm just going to do the Naruto, Sasuke, Kiba, and Shikamaru but I definitely want to delve into other male characters as well when I have more time!

Warning(s): fluff, implied/mentioned past trauma, hurt/comfort

First of all, it important to establish that Naruto is an absolute simp for you. Mans would do anything you ask without a shred of hesitation (golden retriever personality all the way)

However, Naruto, due to his rough upbringing and personality, isn't always the most observant individual

It'll take him some time to notice how much your hair has been stressing you out lately. You also don't want to bother him something that shouldn't be a problem but is because he's already busy with training, etc.

With that said, he does notice eventually and when he does realize what's going on, Naruto will not let the issue go until he's fixed it!

He instantly is stumped on what to do however and quickly seeks out help from Sakura, who just happens to hanging out with the other girls at the time.

Before he knows it, he's going through the ringer, being taught how to braid and all kinds of things. Is he good at it though? No, not in the slightest.

Still, Naruto doesn't give up and for weeks practices whenever he can, with Konohamaru often joining in for the "important training exercise"

Finally, after days of failures and practicing, Naruto approaches you as you once again flick your (h/c) locks from your face and demands to fix it for you

You were honestly dumbfounded by his demand but let him do his thing, only to be shocked when the man pulled out a hair tie out of his pocket!

You continued to be shocked when, after a few minutes and endless chatter from the blonde, your hair was placed in a perfect braid, one better than you could have ever managed.

In the end, Naruto would be beaming with pride and you couldn't help but fall deeper in love with the goofball.

Sasuke, our emo boy, does not and will not care about your hair struggles. At least, not at first or outwardly.

Our emo boy is far quicker than his blonde counterpart in noticing the issues you have with your hair and has no problem in bluntly telling you the truth.

"If it bothers you so much, cut it."

"Deal with it or I'll chop it off myself."

Now this is the point where two different scenarios take form: (1) you do as he says and cut it OR (2) you don't cut it and either beat his ass or simply ignore him

Now if we're dealing with situation one, it honestly fixes nothing. Your hair is still posing to be a problem and nothing gets solved.

Also, let's be honest, Sasuke definitely comes across as a guy that likes to play or at least pull (my kinky folks) your hair as a warning or punishment

He's gonna sulk a bit about that excess hair being gone. If you shave your head completely, the man might even yell at you!

For scenario 2, Sasuke will not tolerate your hair problems impeding his goals. This means that something has got to be done.

Queue Sasuke looking back to his childhood and remembering how his mother tended to her hair, or how Itachi would style his when they were children.

He won't take the effort to learn any techniques or styles like Naruto, it's a waste of his time.

With what he knows, Sasuke will either put your hair in a bun or a braid (he likes the feeling)

If that doesn't work, his patience has run thin and he'll berate you until you figure out what to do with it.

Out of the four guys in this post, Kiba will probably be the most knowledgeable and best at helping with your hair.

He grew up in a house full of girls, that being his mom and sister, and he found himself watching Tsume braid Hana's hair before bed or watching Tsume do the bare minimum with her own but still something.

With Akamaru having long fur as well, Kiba's learned the best way to take care of hair, both human and dog

So, when he notices how you've been struggling with your own hair, dog boy wastes no time in helping you out.

Whenever you're together, his hands are in your hair, either playing with it or styling it with his own preferences.

"Leave it in the buns or else!"

Hella loves putting your hair up cause it means he can smush his face in your neck and chest better. And to show off the hickies he left there the other day

But sometimes he likes it down so he can hide in the curtain of (h/c) and take a quick snooze

I think Kiba would also be pretty open about asking his mom, Hana, or Hinata for ideas from time to time.

He just wants to make sure his pretty little mate is happy and comfortable, even if it means he's gotta put in some extra work

Also, man will also use your hair as an excuse to come over and spend time with you, for training sessions to go longer, the works. Kiba just loves spending time with you!

Instant realization. Instant headache.

Shikamaru notices your hair struggles right away and all he could think at first was "what a drag"

You typically were fine about taking care of your hair but all long haired folks know that there are days of struggles too

He doesn't do anything at first, it's not his responsibility after all, but as the problem persists, so does his want to fix it. He barely wants to put his own hair up, let alone someone else's.

But, the person struggling is you.

Our resident smart boy quickly becomes annoyed with himself as he grows more and more frustrated at seeing the person he loves struggle.

His solution? Nap-.

No, our man, reluctantly mind you, goes to Yoshino and the Nara clan matriarch is far too delighted that Shikamaru feels inclined in any way to help you out

Yoshino quickly, much to Shikamaru's utter dismay, recruits not only Ino but Choji and Ino's moms as well!

Ino, being the teasing brat that she is, invites Hinata, TenTen and Sakura and all Shikamaru wants to do is die

Hours of mindless advice and examples go by and by the time the group of women appear to be satisfied with themselves, Shikamaru is brain dead and wants to bash his head against the wall.

The next time he sees you and before your hair problems can arise, cloud boy orders you to sit down and whips out the hair tie he's been carrying around in his pocket.

Shikamaru lazily yet expertly (just because it was boring didn't mean that he didn't pay attention to the girls' advice) put it up in not only a braid but curls it into a burn at the nape of your neck.

THEN HE PULLS OUT BOBBY PINS!!!!!

If doing your hair stops you from complaining (and it makes you happy), Shika will do it.

But wake him up from a nap or during cloud watching to do? He'll still do it, all the while mentioning how this is such a drag

~~~

Hopefully more to come!

#sjhanny asks #sjhanny #naruto imagines #naruto #naruto uzumaki #naruto x y/n #sasuke x reader #kiba x reader #shikamaru x reader #shikamaru x you #shikamaru x y/n #nara shikamaru x reader #kiba inuzuka x reader #inuzuka kiba x you #inuzuka kiba x y/n #uchiha sasuke x you

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theloveinc · 2 years

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You did really good with what I had! I'm not a fic writer, which is why I wanted to pawn it off. This is blanket permission to take it wherever you want 😊

He's making fun of our slippers? And we're being cute and domestic? Yes please 🥰

And like, he already knew us which is why he wanted to ask us out in the first place, but now after spending so much time with us he really knows us, y'know? Like it's one thing to know someone's favorite snacks, and another to know why it's those ones and not something else. Or how passionately you'll argue with him to defend a certain genre of movie (he's fine with rom-coms, but he'll argue with you about any other genre just to get you riled up).

How do you think he eventually asks us again? Is it super casual like before, or does he put more effort in now that he knows what we'd want? Oh! Do you think he's had to watch us turn down other people, just to turn around and agree to go do an activity with him, but it's not a "date" (hiking, video games, farmers' market, etc.)? I think Denki definitely asked us out once or twice just to mess with him 😂

(are you still doing anon labels/tags on this new blog? If so can I be 🐞 if it isn't already taken? If you're not doing it then don't worry about it! I just foresee me wanting to send more brain rot your way if you're okay with that?)

(pt. i here!)

ARGHHHH, and Bakugo just being increasingly more and more glad that he was turned down initially, cuz now that you're both at the point where you know why you like which snacks, know which socks the other prefers, even the various before work + shower routines you have... things are so much deeper than before.

NOT that you wouldn't have gotten to that point eventually too, but... it almost feels more special this way cuz it's like... his love for you (and you him?) is bigger than ever now.

I definitely think he puts in more effort now, too! Obviously not... too much (just because he has a hard time thinking of things that aren't ridiculous), but he buys you flowers and candies, at the very least! Or maybe writes a card, OR OMG PLANS A LITTLE WALK OR OUTING, like a picnic🥺 cuz by that point, you're basically in the dating stage already so it doesn't feel weird or nerve-racking at all.

Skjdfhaklsdf though, I agree that Denki absolutely asks you out... and yeah, probably not even seriously (cuz of bro-code), but instead to show a crybaby Bakugo that the reason he was rejected wasn't because you didn't like him, but that you were "too busy for anyone and everyone, man" (cuz lord knows he has to explain since Bakugo is peeved @ him LOL).

He feels better when you immediately come round to express how weird it was that Denki asked you out, though... and then ask to do something together later (like you said, and btw, I love all your ideas). It's the one time he's like... damn, Denki was actually Right.

Though honestly, Denki is probably pretty good at dating, in some ways, but I digress!

ANYWAYYY, absolutely you can be ladybug anon!!! You're gonna be my first named anon who didn't move over w/ the same name from IHB, so yes it's available (and super cute)🥰🥰🥰. I really look forward to any future asks you send, and I hope being patient with me when it comes to responding isn't too difficult❤️

Thank you again for this!!!

#bakugo #and sorry for cutting it short #i was just staring at the document debating what to add #and since i have hw i had to get up #but what a lovely thought #honestly the denki part is cracking me up lmaoaoaoa #you are a Big Brain hehehe #anon #caitie answers #caitie things #🐞

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impala1967dwinchester · 3 years

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Sam Winchester: Running Away

Pairing: Sam W. x Reader

Pov: Reader/Sam

Warnings: Panic, anxiety, being scared, mature content, talk of sex, Sam, inner thoughts

Summary: With Y/n and Sam only being together for a short time, when Y/n learns she pregnant she freaks thinking every bad thought about the things that could go wrong.

Word Count: 2.1k

A/N: This is Dominant Sam I'm talking about here, but also a protective Sam. This is for band--pyschos 1.5 followers bingo writing challenge.

Square: First Child

Sam Winchester Master list

Main Master List

TagList: @sweetdetectivequeen @wonderfulworldofwinchester @band--psycho

So, maybe I've been with Sam for a few months, but it's not that big of a deal. We're just a once in a blue sorta thing. Sam and I yes live together alongside his brother Dean, but I don't mean that Sam and I share a bed you know.

Okay well, maybe we do share a room. We share a comfy large bed when a hunt goes bad, or Sam wants to release some tension. We go and let go of our bodies' tension. Together we let everything go, and we sort of become one.

Sam is a giant teddy bear, but when he's had enough put onto his shoulders he needs someone to ground him, that someone for right now just so happens to be me. Bad hunts turn into long, fast, and hard nights.

Nights when Sam drags on, his large hands wrapped my throat pinning me down to the fluffy bed. My nails leaving red marks down his muscled back. His hips snapping against my cervix, his lips leaving bruises on my skin.

The way he'd snap his hips into me as I rode into him. In moments like these Sam was my cowboy, and I was his baby girl. The loud grunts and moans that echoed off the motel, or bunker walls were the most amazing sound to my ears.

The sound of our skin slapping together, and the dominant nature of Sam, his almost animalistic way of fucking me. I wasn't a virgin when I met Sam and Dean, I wasn't a virgin when Sam first came to me with this idea of friends with benefits.

But even without being a virgin, taking Sam for the first time. That made me feel like I had died and came back to life. I know saying that seems probably very odd, but Sam there is something about him that makes him so fucking... fuckable.

The moment that I came down from my high and he laid on top of me, trying his hardest to not lay all his weight on me, I reveled in those moments. Was this what it was like to fall in love with someone?

Would Sam really want that? Would I be enough for Sam?

Months it went on like this, bad hunts or just wanting to let go. It went back and forth. The deal that we held, was for the both of us, and usually, we needed each other at the same time.

Bumping into each other, cute moments. Moments when I would try to put more effort into it. I learned real quick that Sam had a thing for lace and the color red. Something about the way it felt against his hands, or how it looks against my skin tone.

Nothing's more special than having your boy toy pull off your lace panties with his teeth while he makes direct contact. Again there was that dominating nature of Sam. Sometimes my mind would float to what it would be like with Dean, but I would be very much slapped out of that thinking when Sam would snap his hips into me and ask me 'who do you belong to?' or 'Who owns your body?'.

This of course in my world would only last for so long. Something always had to go wrong. So wrong that everything that I had worked for wasn't worth it. Wasn't worth it, if I would just be crashed in the end. I didn't think any wrong could come from fucking my best friend in a way.

Because that was Sam and I are.. were. We are friends, best friends, who know everything about each other, who know when the other is about to have a break or the other needs space. What happens when Sam finds out about this.

This is a normal fuck up that be taken care of. This is my fuck up, this fuck up is huge. He won't want to stay. No, see I've ruined this for the both of us.

What happens if Sam. What if? That's the big question stop overreacting. You've spent time with Dean, ask your question then act, not the other way around. You need to actually find out if your pregnant.

'pregnant' "FUCK" I said out loud rather loud, louder than I should have said it. "Y/n you okay?" I outside the bathroom door. Panicking I slipped the pregnancy test into my sweater pocket. "Yep, I'm super," I said and unlocked the door, slipped by Sam. Smiling before I casually walked away from him. Panicking on the inside.

"what am I going to do?" I asked myself under my breath. "A Winchester baby, a baby, my baby," I said hushed under my breathe. A tap to my shoulder pulled me from my very important inner monologue.

"Y/n, what's wrong with you?" Sam said wrapping his hand around my shoulder. Mouth left gaped open. "Y/n?" Sam repeated, just my name this time made everything worse. The echo of Sam's voice grunting and moaning my name as he comes down from his high.

"Sam," I said looking up at him. These were moments that I said he was a huge teddy bear. Worry crossed his handsome face. "Y/n what's wrong?" Again he forced his first question.

"Nothing Sam. Just let it go." I said tapping his hand on my shoulder. There was a look of upset confusion on Sam's face. "Y/n don't you dare pull away from me, especially after what we have together," Sam said as I walked away. I stopped and thought about it. 'Don't pull him into it, you just take care of it.' I just kept walking.

I made sure that the pregnancy test was really correct, by going to a doctor's office. "You're about six weeks along." The doctor said. More panic. More anxiety, more questions, more thoughts. That drive back to the bunker I was fighting the idea of leaving.

If I just left, what if I just didn't come back. 'No go back and try to hide it, say you're sick, hide in your room. You won't be able to hide it for long' Sam will question you, Sam will notice, he'll notice your body change, he'll notice everything Y/n.

When I got back Sam was waiting for me in the library. "Where were you Y/n?" he asked me as I passed by him "I was out," I said passing quickly. Trying to stay away from him, the closer I am to Sam the harder it is to not tell him the truth. The grip of his hands around my wrist is so powerful, so strong.

"Stop running away. I just need you Y/n I thought..." Sam paused looking down at my body and then to my wrist. "Sam let go of my wrist. You're hurting me." I said ripping my arm from his grasp. Stomping away and down the louder echoing bunker hallway.

'LEAVE' 'No stop he's right you made a promise, a deal.' "Stop" Fighting with myself was the worst of all of this. You can't run away from yourself. No knock at my door, but I wouldn't have known. I had taken a nap my thoughts clouding my mind. Waking up to a quiet bunker and a note stuck to the coffee machine. "Y/n whatever is going on.

That's what I'm here for. Please baby girl. I don't know what to do. Shoot me a message, or even text Dean. Just let me know you're okay." Signed Sam. Yet another wave of new thought, new emotions. I want to stay, but it wouldn't be good for either of us. Nobody benefits from this.

A normal hunts take Dean and Sam about a week tops so with the letter that Sam left behind I can only imagine that Sam is pushing Dean to hunt a lot faster. Get the hunt over and done with come home and figure out what is wrong with me.

I say I've got two days tops before the boys get back. To toggle with the idea of leaving. Two days doesn't seem like enough time, but I need to not trap them in a situation like this. Sam doesn't need to have another thing on his shoulders, Dean doesn't need the worry or the panic. Of a Winchester baby.

Taking a long walk around the bunker brought memories alive in my mind's eye. The great, the good, and the bad. Most of them included Sam. The night he asked me to start this friend with benefits or the wild night that he took me on the book-filled library table. He fucked me in the middle of the wide open.

Would it be bad to say that I fell in love with him from that moment? He made me feel like the only girl in the world. A few spots in the kitchen early morning breakfast being made, and in the garage washing whatever car Dean would let us wash.

'You need to go' Memories pinging in my head. Hitting all the corners of my head. This is the most stressful thing I've ever had to do. There's a baby inside of me now, every choice has to be for this little one. This choice was for Sam and for this little one.

My hand laid on my still flat stomach. I wish that I could feel Sam's hand on top of mine, or watch his face. But that wouldn't be a good idea and I know that.

"They're going to a Winchester in and out," I said walking past Sam and Dean's rooms. I think I'll just have to write a letter to Sam, a sort of backwards odd way of responding to his letter.

This letter will just be my goodbye. "Hey Sam, by the time you read this I'll be long gone. Let me explain. I'm pregnant, with of course your child. We never got the chance to talk about being parents, never got the chance to even have a normal relationship. Sam, I fell hard for you, so hard that I don't want to hurt you. I know you most likely aren't ready to be a dad, so yes I know I'm taking that choice away from you. I am making so many mistakes and I don't want to be a burden on your shoulders or even a burden on Deans. They'll find out about you, they'll be nosy like you, be hardheaded like you, defy me like you defied your father." I wrote out pausing to let my shaking hand take a break.

"Cowboy, I'm running away, because Sam that's the only thing I know how to do. Don't you dare think... Don't you dare ever for a second think that I don't love you, or that this baby won't grow up knowing who is, who knows maybe I'll come back... I love you, Sam, I love you cowboy."

I read over it once and then twice, Dean stood over my shoulder. His hand lying still against my blade. I swiped the pad of my thumb over my Y/n nicely small handwriting. "Sammy?" Dean questioned. "Hmm?" I hummed fearing my voice would give too much away. "What did she write?" He asked, "Y/n wrote that she's pregnant, and she is running away afraid to put the burden of my child on my shoulders and on yours." I said continuing to look at the page in front of me.

"Dean we.." "I've got you, Sammy. We'll find her bring her home and you wife her up." Dean said, grabbing my bag and racing back to the impala. "She's on foot, and most likely hasn't made it very far, I'll call Charlie, you call her," Dean said, whipping out my phone it tumbled in my hands landing on the footwell of the front seat.

Pulling it out it came with pictures, pictures of the three of us. Sitting on baby's hood, her in the middle of the two of us next to her. I could see it now, a baby Winchester, sitting on her lap and taking that picture all over again.

"Sam, Charlie says that she's gonna try her, see if we can sort of trick her into going with Charlie until we can get to her and bring her home," Dean said.

"Yeah let's hope she wants to come home," I said the mix of different emotions and feelings shoring through me, I felt the revive of the impala's engine. 'There's no running away from the Winchesters.'

Completed on: 05/04/2021

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heauxplesslydevoted · 3 years

Note

Hi there! We're changing things up a little this week :)

Not Yet Wed Questions

Note: Great Scott! This week, we are going back in time to MC’s intern year. Think of Ethan’s relationship with them at this point and answer the following questions accordingly. It is entirely up to you when in year 1 this takes place (pre/post Miami, pre/post CH 15, etc). Feel free to answer with dialogue or pictures or both :) Have fun!

No worries. All of this is off the record and HR will never know!

The setting for this answers is:

For Both

When I first saw them, I thought__________

What is your coworker's most used swear word?

Quick: What color are their eyes?

Three people at work your coworker hates?

What is your coworker’s strangest or most endearing quirk?

If they had a crush on anyone at work, who would that be?

(Bonus round! Feel free to skip.)

Never have I Ever:

come into work hungover

had a fistfight

been kicked out of a bar

gotten a tattoo

broken someone’s heart

been in love

For MC (Ethan is not there)

Where do you see him in five years (both professionally and in his personal life?)

What do you find the most impressive about him?

Last thing he texted you?

If he asked you out on a date, what would you say?

For Ethan (MC is not there)

Where do you see him in five years (both professionally and in his personal life?)

What specifically do you find attractive about her?

Last thing she texted you?

If she asked you out on a date, how would you respond?

Alright, post Book 1 but pre-Ethan fleeing to South America Ethan x Naomi coming right up! I feel like that time would have maximum tension because they’re trying to find their footing again after fucking the souls out of each other’s bodies and sending them into orbit, and lowkey falling in love sleeping together, while maintaining professionalism.

~v~

For Both:

When I first saw them, I thought__________

Naomi: I thought “thank God someone else is here!” I was in over my head with that patient, and I didn’t even notice that The Ethan Ramsey was the one assisting me until much later.

Ethan: I thought she had guts. You don’t see too many first day interns that are ready to jump into the fray like she did.

What is your coworker's most used swear word?

Naomi: He says Christ and any iteration of the word damn. Dammit, goddamn, goddammit, you get the gist.

Ethan: She says fuck.

Naomi: You’ve never heard me say that.

Ethan: She says fuck a lot, especially when she’s...*Ethan trails off and catches himself before he finishes that sentence. It’s a moot point all the same because now all he can think about is the young intern in front of him, hands pulling his hair, nails raking down his back, moaning the obscenity into his ear, into his pillows. He awkwardly clears his throat* Just trust me, I’ve heard her say it. Multiple times.

*and now he’s mad at himself*

Quick: What color are their eyes?

Naomi: Blue. They’re kinda hard to miss.

Ethan: Her eyes are brown.

Three people at work your coworker hates?

Naomi: He hates everyone, except for me and Naveen.

Ethan: Except for you? You think pretty highly of yourself, Rookie.

Naomi: Am I wrong? *Ethan doesn’t deny it, instead staying silent and Naomi smirks* Exactly

Ethan: I don’t think she dislikes anyone. I’ve never met a person like her, she makes friends with everyone.

What is your coworker’s strangest or most endearing quirk?

Naomi: He fiddles with his glasses a lot.

Ethan: She’s constantly biting her lip, especially when she’s really focused.

*she’s actually surprised that he picked up on that* Naomi: You notice that?

Ethan: I notice everything...about everything. It’s the nature of the job.

If they had a crush on anyone at work, who would that be?

*they both share an awkward glance before looking away and declining to answer*

Never Have I Ever...

Come into work hungover

Ethan: When I was younger, yes. But now that I’m older, I know my limits.

Naomi: No, because I don’t get hangovers due to my magical hangover cure.

Ethan: That god-awful drink is...surprisingly effective.

*the interviewer asks Ethan to elaborate on the time Naomi gave him whatever her hangover cure is, and he adamantly refuses*

Had a fistfight

Naomi: Yes, but in my defense I was drunk.

Ethan: *snorts* How is that a defense?

Naomi: I’m the daughter of an attorney, I usually try to resolve my issues with my words. But drunk Naomi is a little feistier.

Ethan: You mean you have a level of feistiness that I’ve yet to see?

Naomi: Oh yeah. Anyway, I was in college, I was drunk at a bar, someone spilled a drink on me, and it escalated. I think I broke her nose.

Ethan: An arrest record wasn’t on your file when we hired you.

Naomi: Like I said, I’m the daughter of an attorney, and the granddaughter of a DC judge. That has its perks.

Ethan: Yes, I’ve gotten into a fist fight before. I punched Nash in the face. And before that, i fought my old med school roommate.

Naomi: Ooh, what did he do?

Ethan: That’s not a story I’d ever divulge while sober.

Been kicked out of a bar

Naomi: Yes. Circle back to the previous question.

Ethan: No, because I’m an adult.

Gotten a tattoo

Ethan: Absolutely not

Naomi: I have a tattoo of the Cancer symbol on my left hip. It’s my zodiac sign.

*this stuns Ethan into silence because he’s seen her naked on more than one occasion and been...very well acquainted with the body parts below her waist, and for the life of him cannot remember a tattoo*

Broken someone’s heart

Naomi: No. At least, I don’t think so. I’ve had my heart broken, if that counts.

Ethan: Same as Naomi. I don’t think I have.

*they make a pointed effort to not make eye contact with each other, and Naomi bites down on her lip, letting the silence hang in the air. The alternative would be informing Ethan that he has indeed broken someone’s heart, and that just won’t do.*

Been in love

Naomi: I don’t know. Maybe? I thought I was in love with my med school boyfriend, but now that time has passed, I know that wasn’t love. At least, not the good kind. And there was a near miss after him, but nothing came out of it. The emotions were a lot stronger the second time around though, and i think it’s the closest I’ve come to it this far. I’m a hopeless romantic, so I hope I find it someday.

Ethan: No. Call me a cynic, but I just don’t see love as something that’s feasible and attainable. Putting that much trust and dependency in another person is not realistic.

For Naomi (Ethan is not there)

Where do you see him in five years (both professionally and in his personal life?)

Naomi: I don’t know what’s left for a man like Ethan Ramsey. He’s already done so much in the field of medicine, unless he reinvents the entire wheel and turns it upside down, which I can see him doing. I can see him writing more, publishing more research, and of course winning more awards. If he wasn’t so anti-administration, he could be running this place. Or maybe he’ll start his own non-profit.

Naomi: As far as his personal life, I don’t know. You heard loud and clear that he doesn’t really believe in love. I hope one day he changes his mind or finds a companion, because underneath his extremely prickly exterior, he’s one of the best men I know and he has a heart of gold. He deserves the chance to let someone take care of it for him.

What do you find the most impressive about him?

Naomi: From afar, Ethan seems very larger than life, but I think the most impressive thing about him is his dedication to not just medicine, but his patients. I’ve never seen him not go above and beyond for someone he was treating.

Last thing he texted you?

Naomi: “Please consult Diana in HR regarding your official diagnostic team fellowship application. I know this year has been unorthodox to say the least, but there are still some steps that must be taken before the start of your second year. Thank you.”

Naomi: I’ve never received a text message that long.

If he asked you out on a date, what would you say?

*her cheeks heat up furiously and she pulls her bottom between her teeth before answering, her eyes bright and watery*

Naomi: Am I a total glutton for pain for saying I’d jump at the chance?

For Ethan (Naomi is not there)

Where do you see her in five years (both professionally and in her personal life?)

Ethan: Dr. Valentine has so much potential and she’s going to be one of the greats. She’s going to be running the diagnostics team if she chooses to stay at Edenbrook, and I can’t see Naveen not trying to keep her here. She’s going to win awards, have awards named after her, publish research, lead trials, whatever. I hate to sound banal and cliche, but the sky really is the limit for her. I chose her for a reason, and I plan her helping her reach all of that potential.

Ethan: As for her personal life, I don’t know. Hopefully she finds someone that’s good enough for her.

What specifically do you find attractive about her?

Ethan: A-attractive? *the word comes out in a squeak, but he coughs to cover it up* Why on earth would you assume that I’m attracted to her?

*he goes on a ridiculously long tangent about how inappropriate it is to be attracted to your coworkers, especially your subordinates, and how he would never jeopardize Naomi’s career on something as trivial as attraction, and anyone with an ounce of common sense can tell that he doth protest too much*

Ethan: But if I absolutely had to pick something besides her good looks, it’d be her spirit. She’s warm and empathetic and optimistic, and I’ve never seen someone care as much as she does.

Last thing she texted you?

Ethan: “👍” I sent her a message about her upcoming fellowship and she sent back a thumbs up. Just that. I was a little annoyed.

If she asked you out on a date, how would you respond?

Ethan: As um...flattering as that might be, I would say no. I am an attending, she’s an intern, my soon to be fellow. That is crossing too many ethical lines, lines I refuse to breach.

Ethan: And I would say no because Naomi is...just a good person. And maybe I’m being biased, but I don’t know if anyone will ever be truly worthy of her. But I can say without a shadow of a doubt that she deserves so much better than me or what I could give her.

#ethan ramsey #ethan ramsey x mc #newlyweds game with your host bree

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vickyvicarious · 3 years

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Parker: "Teach me to like stuff."

Okay, so. I have some thoughts about The French Connection Job's Parker+Eliot subplot. And I think I wanna approach it separately, scene by scene from each of their perspectives, because we have a couple different things going on here. It's still a little more of a Parker meta than an Eliot meta, but I have enough to talk about on both sides, and they're connected enough not to be in separate metas, that I am going to do it this way.

Also going to put this under a cut because it gets long.

Parker

This whole subplot comes on the heels of the last episode, in which there was a lot of banter throughout about Hardison and Parker's dates, and him wanting to branch out into other things than just bungee jumping or whatever. We have seen hints of this throughout S5 so far, even though we're only a few episodes in at this point. They went on a world tour that was pretty much just jumping off of stuff, Hardison said something about them figuring things out. We saw a cute domestic scene of the aftermath of them watching a movie together, except Parker 'fell asleep again' and missed most of it, and Hardison eventually went off to work on his laptop. Parker tried to comfort him last episode about dust mites and ended up freaking him out instead. She talked about how she liked fire and Hardison complained she was missing the point of his offer for a candlelit picnic. They did end on a very romantic note with her still making the effort to make it happen but getting rained out, and him recognizing her effort and listening to him, and projecting the stars around the dark room then having the picnic inside. They are clearly very happy together and both making the effort to meet in the middle, but there are still some disconnects. Which makes sense this early on anyway, but it's not out of place for Parker to start getting worried about her limited interests here given the context of them contrasting Hardison's more widespread interests.

Starting right off the bat - there's a picture limit so I can't show these early moments, but throughout the first part of the episode we see Parker looking visibly upset/pensive. Hardison notices and asks her what's wrong, but is immediately distracted by his package arriving, and then the team gets into the briefing and he doesn't get to talk to her again. (Sidenote that this is pretty OOC for Hardison, and I have to assume he would at the very least come back to her later, but they were clearly trying to get Parker talking with someone else this episode and apparently couldn't come up with a better way to do it. His writing outside of the kitchen stuff was kinda off this whole episode anyway, what with the whole tip thing.) She was about to open up to him, however, which is important. There's also a scene shortly afterwards where she confides in Nate, again after he notices her being upset and asks what's bothering her. She claims everyone but her has 'a thing', and names a few of them. He asks her what she thinks when she sees Michelangelo's David, and when her answer is an immediate assessment of how it's guarded and what she'd have to do to steal it, he kind of hesitates and then goes right back to running the con. He basically gives up on helping her with this once it becomes clear that a quick sentence or two isn't gonna cut it.

So after those brief, unhelpful conversations, that's when she makes a move. She was responding to others before, but this time she comes up to Eliot, clearly nervous. And she asks him to help her feel something.

(I find it very interesting that she doesn't ask Sophie. Sophie is the person who she would usually go to for something like this, after all. But, aside from this being an Eliot-centric episode and just like them sidelining Hardison's possible assistance earlier the writers want Parker to talk with Eliot not Sophie, I think there are maybe a couple reasons why she might go to him here. First, just distance. Eliot is right downstairs, meanwhile at the moment Sophie is however far across town at her theater. Certainly not saying she wouldn't go to Sophie eventually, but maybe that's why not first. Second, she and Eliot have an understanding, one that's been explicitly acknowledged since the start of S4. They are similar in a way entirely unlike the rest of the crew. So while Sophie may understand emotions best, Eliot is the one most likely to know what Parker is talking about when she says she just isn't feeling anything. Which by the way I'm gonna get more into later on. Thirdly they're in love but that's not actually relevant here since all of the team love one another.)

Eliot

On Eliot's side, she approaches him when he's busy in the kitchen. This whole job is stirring up a lot of old feelings in him right from the start. Toby was someone who 'kept him from falling all the way down', and Eliot is deeply concerned for him. At the same time, the way they are running this con is allowing Eliot to take on the role of teacher. Even though his students aren't anything like the eager students Toby has just had taken away from him, Eliot wants so badly to take advantage of this opportunity to teach them - maybe even all the more because they're resistant. He's being given a very rare opportunity to indulge his belief that food is life and to share it on a larger scale. To use the knife to create, not just destroy. Leverage often walks a line between doing both (taking down the bad guys and helping people) but Eliot doesn't often just straight up get to just do the 'creating' part. (I mean, he loves the destruction too, he genuinely loves beating people up and taking down bad guys, but this is a rarer pleasure.) So he's pretty preoccupied with that at first, and initially dismisses Parker just like the other two guys did.

But when she just looks quietly disappointed at his response, he goes still and watches her. We cut away from them here so we don't see his actual response, but it's immediately clear that he's realizing this is actually something deeply important to Parker, and well worth his time.

On to the next part of this scene below.

[Eliot sets a dish down in front of Parker]

Parker: "...It's just food."

Eliot: "It's not just food! Alright, some people could look at it and just see food, but not me. I see art. When I'm in the kitchen I'm, I'm creating something outta nothing, you know what I mean? And sometimes I crush it, sometimes it's crap, but either way - it makes me feel something."

Parker: "Feel what?"

Eliot: "Just... feel."

Parker: [murmuring] "Feel... okay." [looks down at the food and hesitates]

Eliot: "You know, I didn't feel anything for a long time. Then Toby taught me how to cook, and after he did, I started to feel stuff again. That's why I share it through my food - this is my art. This is my art, Parker." [Parker nods, looking worried] "It's like lettin' a stranger in your head, just for a second. And you allow them to feel what you're feeling." [pause] "Look again." [he pushes the plate a little closer to her. Parker takes a deep breath and slowly sets her elbows down on the counter as she stares down at the plate. Eliot watches her closely.]

Parker

At this point I want to talk a little about what Parker means when she says "feel something" and talks about "having a thing." Because we've seen her have interests outside of straightforward thievery before. Sure, most of her hobbies revolves around stealing - casing local banks for fun, for example. But she clearly has a deep love for Christmas and for chocolate. So why doesn't she count those kinds of things as 'feeling something'?

I think it comes down to what Eliot's talking about here. It's a sense of art. Not even necessarily making it yourself, although that certainly applies. Parker likes sweet things like chocolate and donuts, but although she really really likes them they don't make her feel any truly deep emotion. It's more tactile than anything else, just a pleasant flavor. Her love of Christmas isn't the same either in her eyes because it's not uniquely hers. It's something she loves to celebrate but she can't do so all year round, and plenty of other people like Christmas too. This one comes a lot closer, because it definitely seems to be tied up more in community and family for her than something like enjoying chocolate and piñatas, but it still doesn't belong to her in the same way that cooking does to Eliot or theater does to Sophie. And while theoretically her love of base jumping and so on could maybe count, it is still so tied up in her thieving that it doesn't feel separate. She's really good at drawing but only thinks of it as a useful skill, not a creative outlet - this is similar to that.

She has been branching out into a lot of new experiences and emotions lately, and while she's struck out deep into uncharted waters with her relationship with Hardison, once there she's only seeing more and more things that she just... doesn't get. She loves spending time with him, and enjoys what they do together, but she doesn't understand all of those things. Not on a deeper level. She wants to feel that sense of connection to something, wants to feel deeply emotionally moved by something.

And honestly? I think she's way up in her head about it. I'm not trying to dismiss her struggle here at all, but I do think she is stressing herself out about having something uniquely her own. About having a huge interest that speaks so strongly to her personally. And those are amazing to have, but it's really not necessary. She doesn't need a strong secondary passion so much as she needs to let go of trying so hard to force herself into something.

And what's happening in this scene in particular is that Parker is trying so so hard to force herself to feel something. It's evident in her face throughout the whole scene, in her body language. And she is so terrified that it's not going to work that honestly, I'm not surprised at all that it doesn't.

Eliot

On Eliot's side of this scene, he feels like he recognizes where Parker is. This entire job has him remembering how it was to feel nothing. Her phrasing got to him deeply. He wants to reach out and teach her to see something more, just like Toby taught him.

He knew a bit about how to cook before Toby. But it was only seeing Toby's passion that struck something in him, that awoke a part of himself he might've never known before. For Eliot specifically, cooking being an art isn't just something he likes. It's something that brings him hope.

Eliot doesn't believe in redemption. But he believes in actions. And what Toby did, by teaching him to cook, was to teach him that his actions can be good. That he can create, not just destroy. That all is not lost - not 'for' him necessarily, so much as 'in' him. There is a deep empty place inside himself that he can enter so so easily. The difficulty is crawling back out again. Cooking was his rope out of there. He still finds it difficult to express his emotions very often, particularly verbally, but when he makes someone a meal he puts a part of himself into it. And yet doing so doesn't take anything from him, it just adds more.

This is all very vague and figurative and may make no sense, but the takeaway I want to have is that Eliot is opening up to Parker on a very deep level here. He feels like he recognizes what she's talking about, and it was a very bad place for him. (Again, I don't think she is quite that badly off at this point in canon, but I digress.) And while making food allows him to feel that he is demonstrating his love for someone, that he is sharing a part of himself with them, he recognizes that she isn't receiving that. What she's getting, is just a plate of food. Tasty food maybe, but nothing more than that. And so Eliot verbalizes everything to her in a way he rarely does.

And then he keeps trying. This scene obviously doesn't end up making her feel something, and we don't get to see the immediate aftermath of that, but we can glean a little about how they feel based on their reactions. And Eliot is deeply determined to help Parker feel something from his food. He insists that she play the food critic; even speaks directly to her and reminds her to consider what they talked about.

In the restaurant, we start out with Parker dutifully playing her role but feeling nothing much beyond just the role. Eliot checks in with Parker, she acknowledges that the food is good but doesn't make her feel anything, and he makes improvements based on her feedback. Then something abruptly changes.

Parker: "I can taste garlic, and mushrooms... and something else that makes me feel different."

Hardison: "Wait, was that for me, cause I-I don't get it."

Parker: "No, it's the food. I get it." [smiles] "I feel something."

Parker: "Mmm! These black noodles are amazing!

Eliot: "Parker, it's tagliolini nero con gamberi."

Parker: "Mmm." [eats a huge forkful] "Mmm. Mmmm. These are really good."

Parker

What just happened here? Last we saw from Parker, she'd failed to feel something from the meal Eliot made especially for her in the brewpub, and she was clearly disheartened. She felt it as a failure, very much in the sense of a disappointment. She didn't want to try again, didn't think it would work, and tried to protest when Eliot said she would be the food critic. Even once she got to the restaurant, nothing was happening for her.

The difference wasn't in the flavor of the food. The moment Parker started to feel something was right after she said she felt nothing and Eliot, instead of being disappointed or giving up, took it as a challenge. He changed his recipe, he improved it specifically to better reach out to her. He kept trying.

And yeah, maybe the bone broth helped it taste better. But that wasn't the point, not really. The point is that Parker had gotten herself stuck in a hole, trapped herself in this cycle of not understanding how things make you feel and then believing that she just couldn't. She wanted something of her own and she didn't have it and she didn't immediately get anyone else's thing either, and that was it. She just wasn't capable. She was other. This is an old old fear of Parkers, dating back to Archie or even before. Something in her just isn't capable of being like other people. She wasn't worthy of being in Archie's real family, and she's not able to feel passion for anything outside of stealing. (Setting aside the fact that she loves her team, that all she needed was the right family. That you don't have to be a creator to feel passion, and you don't need to be passionate about any particular thing in order to feel deeply and find beauty in the world.) Parker has empathized deeply with people, has felt so intensely before and is constantly trying to learn more and new ways to be. But because she is noticing her teams' passions now, she has this ideal that she wants to reach, and none of that is good enough for her. She doesn't even know exactly what her ideal involves, but she can't get to it.

But when Eliot doesn't give up, that gets to her. If he views his food as sharing himself with others, Parker finally gets what he's been trying to give all along. It's all about him trying again and again, changing his approach to match her better. That's what she feels, that's what she enjoys.

And once she starts, the floodgates open. She loves the black noodles. She is so happy, she is relieved. There was this huge resistance that she couldn't get past before, but Eliot persisting helped her to break past that and now that she is out of her head about it she can enjoy the food in a way she never has before. Because she feels his love for her in it.

Eliot

Eliot is trying so hard to connect to Parker. It's not really different from what I said in the last Eliot section, and basically the same as what I just said in that Parker section, but I want to emphasize a little more just how much this is about love on his end.

Eliot loves Parker. He loves her, and he wants so much to help her. It doesn't honestly matter that he does this with food, except for the fact that food is what matters so deeply to Eliot himself. He can't reach out to her in the same way through any other medium. And we don't get to see his reaction to Parker's moment of realization. But I think it would be such a deep sense of joy. This is as fulfilling for Eliot as it is for Parker. It's exactly what Eliot has been hoping for this whole episode, to teach someone else to see food in the same way he does. It doesn't matter if it only lasts for a moment or a single meal. That's enough. He has been the support Parker needed through this time of self-doubt. And it is all the more meaningful to him because this isn't just a random student, this is Parker.

He told her he loves her through his food, again and again, and she eventually felt it. She understood. That must mean so much to him.

I wanna end with one more brief note on Parker. Does she get her own "thing" this episode? No. No she does not, and this scene shows us that. Parker is not suddenly interested in food or cooking. The importance of that meal was purely derived from Eliot on the other end of it, focused on her and trying his best to reach out to her.

And I don't think this is something only Eliot could have done for her either, not really. The difference between him and the others this episode is mostly in persistence. However, it's also about her mentality. Hardison has built/done things for Parker before and she felt them just as deeply - but the context was different. She wasn't looking for a sense of beauty or art in the world at large then, and so even though she felt the love in the gift just as much, it didn't make her feel like she could find that kind of emotion in other things. She just wasn't looking for it. Also, it was made easier for Eliot to reach out because there's that connection Parker has with him, that understanding that they are on the same level somehow. She doesn't feel that with Hardison - and she loves him all the more for him being different from her, but he also I think can intimidate her with how good and open he is, with how much he can feel in so many different directions. It's part of why she got so worried about herself not being able to do so this episode.

Like, the team has scolded Nate for not having a life or interests of his own outside the job not too terribly long ago! And Parker has had her own joys before! But she isn't seeing that this episode, too caught up in this fear about not having her own 'thing', not feeling anything that way. So while anyone could have helped her through this, it was easiest for her to let Eliot do so + for him to understand what she needed from him. (Hardison in particular was rudely robbed the opportunity, but they all love and support her and could have reached her. Not to detract from Eliot doing so, but also I don't wanna sound like no other method of reaching out would've worked.)

But as soon as she feels something once with Eliot's help, that relaxes those fears. And then Parker is free to look in other places. She remembers Nate's comment about art, and maybe even tells him what she plans based on him knowing where she is at the end of the episode. And then she goes to visit this statue. In her own way which means breaking in, but without any goal of taking it. She just goes to look at the art. And she feels something again.

Parker doesn't gain some big passion at the end of this episode. She doesn't need to. She never did. She just learns how to let herself relax from that restrictive frame of mind. To simply be in the moment and enjoy things for the sake of what they are. To feel - not really in any way she was incapable of before, but intentionally now. It's a quiet victory, in the end. It doesn't mean she's going to get a new hobby or change her lifestyle at all really. But she's let go of a fear and is now intentionally seeking out new connections with the world beyond her once-limited parameters.

#leverage #leverage meta #parker #eliot spencer #my meta #ugggggh why did this get so long?! i just wanted to jot down a few thoughts!#hopefully it's coherent #i'm like half-asleep at this point which probably accounts for the length since i ramble on when i'm tired. and also hopefully for anything #that doesn't make sense

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anextraordinarymuse · 3 years

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I'm just gonna go ahead and make a new post to respond to your points Katie (@jonesgirl88) so that we're not constantly reblogging and trying to load all of those gifs.

Jump to the DLO dance: there is a war going on in Oliver's head and the fact Eric can act that so we can see it? Brilliant. Chef's kiss. He's so torn and you can feel it and your heart breaks for both of them. He's holding her hand to his heart but Shane is also physically on his right side. Her chin is nearly resting on his right shoulder and he's pulled her close to his right side. What say you?

I noticed this too, of course. But first - Eric and Kristin deserve awards. All of the awards. They act beautifully, and they play off of each other so well - they're wonderful scene partners. Okay anyway. Yes, Shane is physically on his right side and has many points of contact along that side (like you said, her chin is nearly on his shoulder) but I pointed out their hands specifically because they are originally positioned away from their bodies. Shane and Oliver's physical closeness is a given in this moment because dancing is intimate. It requires that a lot of you be in contact with a lot of your partner. But originally Oliver and Shane's hands are extended away from them until Oliver pointedly draws them in and places Shane's hand over his heart. This movement is unnecessary in the context of ... well, anything. It's a purely instinctive and intimate move. He could have simply let go of her hand, or drawn it closer and then held it in some other position, but no: he pulls it right in against him. That's why I included it. I'm sure that it was included in the blocking and written in to the script because we're meant to notice it.

I could write for days about that DLO dance scene. THE. FREAKING. CHEMISTRY. I blush ridiculously easily (seriously it's A Problem and I hate it) and I would have been crimson that whole time if I were Kristin. The Tenderness. The Tension. The way his eyes dart back and forth right before he lets her go because he's so at war with himself: kiss her or let her go? O.Y.E.

They're standing in a line (because they're being given awards) but he's turning towards her and she's turning towards him. I just...I can't with these two.

This is totally A Thing©. Shane and Oliver both have a tendency to turn in toward each other like that - but especially Shane. It's an unconscious attempt to take refuge in Oliver and his strength, I think. She often does it in times when she's seeking comfort and closeness/affection. That moment where Shane is sleeping on Oliver's shoulder is one my favorite moments of it, but there's another one that's a small moment (that apparently was either filmed in a longer moment and cut, or aired as a longer moment/actual hug in one of the international versions).

Right before the scene fades into the next one we see Shane turn herself even more into Oliver's left side and tuck her head, as if she's going to bury her face in his shoulder. I wish we'd been gifted with more of this moment! Look at the way she tucks her arm into him and tips her head - she even kind of pushes her hip into his side. I just love this moment a lot.

1) Shane is shown to be freaking out when closed in the vault. Her fear seems to trigger at odd times? She's fine when she learned there's 13 hours of air; she's fine when she learns there's actually less than 5 hours of air; she's fine when she's bored and wants to play a game; but Katherine might be dead so she freaks out? I get it, she believes their fate to be tied together but then why wasn't she more fearful before they started reading the letters? It just doesn't make a lot of sense.

I think for a large part of this Shane was doing a good job of distracting herself and focusing on something else. But reading the letters made them both emotional: they connected with something poignant in those letters. They're reading about two people who fall in love despite their circumstances and share something beautiful even if it's only words - and then find out at the end that these two people may not have actually been able to be together. Not only does that mirror their situation, but all of a sudden it seems like they might never have the chance to be together either (to Shane) because, oh yeah, they're also in danger of not breathing anymore - and I think that just brought her fear to the surface. Also, it's a small moment, but Shane wasn't too thrilled about having to go into the vault at all. When she first sees it she hesitates and says "in there?" like she'd rather not go anywhere near it. I always took it as a small nod to the fact that Shane might not have a love of small spaces. We've never seen it mentioned again though, so who knows.

I know it's part of the story but he literally just wrote he's willing to give things with Holly another chance but then spends his time thinking of Shane when reading the letters.

Yes! And I have always taken this as another indication that, at this point, Oliver is saying what he feels he should have said long ago. He's making the effort he feels duty bound to make. I mean, I think part of him does want to put in the effort - but that part is his head. His rational mind, and probably his memories of Holly and his affection for her, and the importance he puts on his marriage vows. This is another reason why I truly don't think his heart is with Holly anymore, or in his marriage. AT NO POINT after he writes that letter and tucks it away does he think of Holly. He's reading powerful, moving love letters between two people and the only person he thinks about is Shane? And - we don't find this out until later, but still - the letter he does write to Holly isn't that romantic. He promises to try to see her dreams through her eyes, and says that he's willing to change, but there's nothing about how much he loves her or how her absence has affected his heart or his life. Maybe because Oliver didn't really believe when he was writing it that he was in danger? I don't know. But it's interesting.

That hand grab!! ... And then the way she looks at him as he sings along at the end when Rita wins?? I can't with this man. I can't with this woman.

Um, yes. Shane takes Oliver's hand and he just ... short circuits. It's hilarious. And they're so smitten with each other it's ridiculous.

And in that hospital scene, Oliver absolutely would have let anyone sleep on his shoulder like that. But it wasn't anyone: it was Shane, and it was Shane after all of the emotional intimacy they shared in The Treasure Box; and, once again, it was Shane turned into his side like Oliver offered to let her lay her head there, or she knew what she was doing when she did, because she's not facing forward in the chair with her head to one side like she just accidentally fell asleep and then her head sort of slid to one side. She's angled her body into his. Her feet are pointing toward him. Her hand is just under/next to his arm. How did they get to that moment? I NEED TO KNOW.

(I always understood Jordan to just be an angel. Definitely open to interpretation though.)

OLIVER IS THE ANSWER TO HER LETTER. His words, his faith, his person is the answer to Shane's childhood prayer she never forgot. He opens the wound but it's destined he's the one to help her heal.

Oliver is the embodiment of Shane's hope. Jordan couldn't answer her letter because it had to be Oliver, which he realized. And before he leaves the chapel he says to Oliver "take good care of that little letter writer." HE'S TALKING ABOUT SHANE. In the Impossible Dream, Shane tells Oliver that he's given her something she'll never forget: "a little hope for this world." Oliver. Is. Shane's. Hope. Oh my gosh! She's his heart, he's her hope. How tooth-rottingly, disgustingly sweet. I love it.

Extra point: Kristin can rock a leather skirt...like hot damn woman.

A) she always looks so good, but yes, this leather skirt and periwinkle/lavender top is one of my favorite looks on her, and B) I love her fashion and style and aspire to be that fashionable one day.

Holly and Oliver try to have a conversation with words and they fail.

This literally just occurred to me: Holly herself points out that she and Oliver suck at having actual conversations. Physically they click, so they obviously had a lot of chemistry, but they struggle to just talk to one another. Juxtapose that with Shane, who literally understands Oliver so well and on such a deep level that she not only understands him when no one else does, she can actively translate him. The reunion in HG instantly comes to mind here. She translates in real time for the audience what Oliver means ("And I might be the only person on Earth who understands what you just said!") But she also translates what he says for their waitress in OIAM ("Oh, he just means that people weren't having their booshes (or however you spell that) amused in the 20th century.")

In the Pilot and The Masterpiece, things get McSteamy so quickly but it never starts out that way ... He's trying for the sake of his marriage one last time but his head and heart aren't in it.

Exactly! The pull between him and Shane is magnetic. It's natural and impossible to ignore. This is why I maintain that even if Holly had changed her mind and asked to work on their relationship it never would have worked. Oliver was in love with Shane by this point even if he wouldn't say it or wasn't ready to acknowledge it (although Jordan played a part in making Oliver more aware of this truth. Hard to ignore when a freaking angel points out to you how important someone is to you.)

To Holly, kissing Oliver is akin to breaking promises to herself ... To Shane, kissing Oliver is akin to keeping promises.

Well, you just blew my mind. This is so true! Holly tells us that the only way she could see to live her dream was to stop kissing Oliver (insinuating that it was also to leave him behind); Shane's dream seems to just be ... Oliver. Sharing a life with him; delivering dead letters with him; loving him.

BRB, sobbing over this stupid show and these idiots in love.

I do think that Holly and Oliver parted amicably. I can't decide if I think that Holly asked about Shane, or if she made a comment about her (directly or indirectly). I kind of feel like Holly was more the type to make a comment than ask a question.

I am dying over the logistics of Oliver actually buying that porch swing. Well dressed Oliver scouring the aisles of Walmart at like midnight for the perfect porch swing while surrounded by a bunch of people in their pajamas and college kids on middle of the night snack runs because they're marathoning TV shows instead of studying? Hilarious. Headcanon accepted.

Back to the topic at hand...I do think some of the left/right stuff is purely ease of blocking

As do I. I'm definitely reading more into it than I'm meant to at some points, there's just SO MUCH of it and it's so fun to contemplate that I went for it.

THE HUG IN TRUTH BE TOLD.

hahahahahahaaa ... the way that Shane literally just drops everything and wraps her arms around him slays me. The stunned little pause where Oliver's arms are just up in the air for a second, as if he's somehow surprised at the force of her hug despite having watched her move toward him, and then he tentatively puts his arms on her back and then ... he holds her a little tighter. Ugh. UGH. I DIE.

CAN WE TALK ABOUT OLIVER IN FLANNEL WITH THE SLEEVES ROLLED UP??

Yes. A million times, yes. Oliver with his sleeves rolled up? Outstanding. Oliver in flannel? An absolute vision. Oliver in flannel with his sleeves rolled up? I C A N N O T.

There will be more. I need to make the gifs, but there's going to be a part 4. And probably 5. In fact, I think this is just going to become a series of Things I Need To Scream About™ with supporting gif evidence.

I'll try to break it up though, so there's just ShOliver stuff, just Shane stuff, and just Oliver stuff. And then all Postables stuff because they're the cutest little Postal family ever.

#oliver x shane #shane x oliver #sholiver #Jess' thoughts #look at us bringing life to these tags lol #in my head it's just you and me in this little room freaking out together about these idiots Katie #like every once in a while someone opens the door and it's just us #squealing at each other and flailing #and whoever it is just closes the door and backs away quietly like #nope not going in there

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orange-waterfalls · 4 years

Text

Then Leave

Yancy x gender neutral!reader

@spycii ty for the prompt!

A/N: holy shit this took so long lol. I suck at writing angst unless it's with my own characters,,, this is so very bad I'm sorry,,, also Yancy has anger issues apparently. Rated T for some cursing. Angst(?) w/fluff at the end. I'm sorry I can't write straight angst it's too much for me.

Word Count: 2k

---

Yancy was elated when you decided to stay with him. He'd been pretty interested in you since you showed up, and didn't want you going and breaking out. When you told him you were staying, he was happier than he had any right to be. Yes! He got to spend more time with yous! That's amazing!

The first few weeks were great. You two loved talking and hanging out. Yancy could sense the others were a bit jealous of you, but he really didn't care much. You were all he really needed. After about two months, he noticed you distancing yourself. You were keeping a space between you and him when you hung out, and not talking as much. Half a year had passed and you just stopped. You stopped talking, stopped actively hanging out with him, stopped acknowledging him. He was disappointed, to say the least. The other inmates started to be around him more, but he didn't pay any attention to them. He thought of different ways to get you back. He convinced one of the cooks to bake you a cake for your birthday. You seemed to appreciate the effort and started talking to him again. You talked to him about how you missed your family, and Yancy tried to convince you to not care about it.

"C'mon, yous has a new family! We're your family!" He consoled. "Yous needs to leave the past in the past." You smiled at him appreciatively. He loved it when you smiled. So when you stopped smiling altogether, he got worried. He told you about his worries, and you told him you were fine. He didn't believe you. To sell the fact that you were fine, you forced yourself to smile more often. He'd tell you a joke to make you feel better, and you'd smile at him. But he could tell it wasn't a real smile. It was a smile to make him feel better.

It didn't, really.

But he pretended like it did so you didn't have to worry.

You two would always meet out in the yard at the same time every day, but one day, you hadn't shown up. Yancy waited in you guys' spot for half an hour before thinking to look somewhere else. He started to go back inside when Bambam stopped him.

"Hi, Yancy!" He greeted happily. "How've you been?" Yancy smiled at him, slightly aggravated, not wanting to show it.

"Hey, Bambam. I've been alright," he answered. Bambam looked around.

"So, where's the new family member?" he asked. The fact that Bambam was stopping him from finding exactly who he was talking about angered Yancy. He knew you wouldn't want him to snap at his family, so he kept it to himself.

"That's what I was hoping to find out. They's been… upset lately…" he explained. Bambam frowned.

"Oh. What do you think the problem is?" He asked worried.

"I'm not sure…" Yancy sighed, "they's… talked about missing their family…" Bambam scratched his neck.

"You know, Yancy, they seemed pretty attached to their family… maybe it'd be better for them if they left…" he suggested. Yancy clenched his fists.

"No, it wouldn't. They like it here. They don't want to leave," he growled. Bambam stepped back at his violent tone, and Yancy walked past him and into the prison.

He wandered the halls, looking for you. You weren't in any of the places you two hung out. Finally, he checked your cell, where you've said you don't like going. You were there on the bed, curled up on your side in a fetal position. He sighed in relief and opened the door. You flinched as you heard the door creak. He walks into the cell quietly.

"There yous is! I was starting to get worried you'd taken parole." He joked. You didn't respond or even acknowledge he'd walked in. He stood there for a minute, not knowing what to do. Eventually he sighed.

"Ok, can yous just… tell me what's wrong? I've been worried about yous and… I'm not sure what to do about it… tell me?" You don't respond. "Please?" You sighed.

"I miss Mark." You said bluntly. Yancy stood there, not really knowing how to respond.

"Mark? Didn't he… you know… die? Or did he just… take parole? There's really nothing I can-"

"I miss Mark, I miss my friends, I miss my family…" you said, voice wavering. Yancy knits his eyebrows, not understanding what you want.

"So? I don't know what you want to-"

"I want to leave, Yancy." You finally turned to look at him and he saw your red eyes and tear-stained cheeks. He frowned at you.

"Leave? But… you decided to stay!" He started to get angry. "Why would you want to leave?!" You stood up.

"Because I miss the people in my life Yancy!" You raised your voice at him.

"Then why did you stay?! Why haven't you broken out or taken parole or… or…" he was cut off by you.

"Because I'm in love with you, you fucking moron!" You yelled. He steps back at your accusing tone. In love… with him? That made him happy, but the tears flowing from your eyes destroyed that feeling and replaced it with guilt. "You love it here. You love your family. And I love you and I want you to be happy. So I stayed." You explain. "I had a family! I had people who loved me and now they don't even visit me! I am not happy! I haven't been happy in awhile! I want to leave!" Yancy stopped thinking clearly and blurted the first thing that came to mind.

"Then leave! Just fucking go, then!" He said, his voice venomous. You stare at him and compose yourself.

"Maybe I will."

And you did.

You broke out of the prison after two days. All the inmates were happy that you'd be with your people again, but they saw something was different with Yancy. He was more distant. More angry. He snapped at them a lot and made rude comments. Tiny decided that she was going to confront him about it. He had no right to do this to them. She was gonna march into his cell and give him a piece of her mind. That's what she'd do.

She walked into his cell and…

He was there. On his bed. Sobbing into his hands. She could see the tears seeping through his fingers.

And all her plans were flung out the window.

She tiptoed over and gently sat next to him. He flinched before turning away, wiping his face.

"What do you want?" He asked, attempting to sound tough. He just sounded sad. Tiny put a hand on his shoulder. He turned to her, looking at her hand weirdly. She sighed.

"What's the problem, Yancy?" She asked gently. He tried to glare at her, but his lip started quivering and he let out a sob, burying his face into his hands again. Tiny patted his back in an attempt to make him feel better.

"I miss them… I miss them so much…" he cried. Tiny frowned and furrowed her eyebrows.

"Yancy..." She began. She was going to try to convince him to get over you. But before she could, he just went on rambling on and on about everything he loved and missed about you. Your skin, your eyes, your smile…

She could tell this wasn't going away anytime soon.

"Yancy…" She sighed. "You need to make parole." Yancy looked up at her.

"W-What?"

"You need to be good. You need to not be seen as a threat anymore. You need to leave."

"But-"

"You love them. There's nothing you can do about that, except be with them."

"Tiny… I've done-"

"Yeah, yeah, bad things. You killed people. Yancy, I'll be honest, none of us really care about that. You're the only one. We think you deserve to be happy, and if being with them is how that's gonna happen, then so be it," She explained. Yancy was about to argue, but he thought about your face when he told you to leave, and he closed his mouth.

"Ok…"

He turned into the perfect prisoner. He did everything he was told, he didn't speak out of line, he worked as a cook in the cafeteria, he got rid of his shank. He eventually made parole. That was great, but he wasn't exactly sure where to go from there. How was he supposed to find you? He was on his way out when he saw the guy you came in with. What was his name… Mark? You had mentioned that you were roommates, so he figured this was his best chance. Yancy walked up to him and tapped his shoulder. He turned towards him, startled.

"Uh… hi? Can I help you?" He asked.

"Where do you live?"

"Pardon?"

"Sorry… I'm Yancy. I want to find your friend and… I figure… you would know where they live… since you live together…" he explained awkwardly. Mark stared at him for a moment.

"Why do you want to find them?" He asked, suspicious. Yancy blushed a bit and scratched his neck. Mark rolled his eyes before taking a piece of paper and writing an address on it. He handed Yancy the piece of paper.

"Knock when you get there." He explained. "You don't look like a serial killer… this may be a bad idea but… I suppose I can trust Y/N to take care of themselves. Besides, this year's already been weird as hell... I'm sure it'll be fine." Yancy nodded and thanked him. He asked his parole officer to take him to the address. On the ride there, he bounced his leg, anxious for what you'd say. Would you forgive him? Would you still be mad? Would you hate him? He'd deserve it…

"Here." The officer said as they parked near a house. Yancy nodded and got out of the car, approaching the house. He stopped at the door and raised his fist to knock. He stopped, suddenly realizing that he'd rather not have you tell him he wasn't worth a visit every three weeks. He slowly lowered his arm to his side and sighed. He turned back towards the cop car and-

click

"Yancy?"

creak

Yancy spun back around to look at the door, where you were standing. You looked… better than in the prison. Less tired. Less sad.

"Hey! How's it going?" He asked nervously. You weren't smiling, you weren't asking a bunch of questions about him, you didn't seem very interested in him or what he was doing there. That made him nervous. He shifted in his spot. You both were silent for a moment. You crossed your arms and took a breath.

"I thought… I thought you liked prison, Yance." He smiled at the nickname.

"Oh, uh… I…" he swallowed, his throat dry. "I-I like yous a little more than I do prison…" you stared at him. He shuffled his feet. You sighed.

"Yancy…"

"Ok, look. I know I messed up. I know. But I want to make it right, and I want to be with yous." You raised an eyebrow.

"Be with me… as in…?"

"Dating. Yes." He said quickly. You tap your arm.

"Yancy… I don't…" you start. He can feel his heart shattering already. "You're the one who told me to leave the past in the past… that's what I was doing with the prison." You explained.

"Well… maybe… since I'm in yous' present… I can be part of your future!"

"What?"

"I'm not sure…"

"Yancy…" you started. He looked at you hopefully. You sighed. "I'll… think about it."

"Oh… right, sure…"

"You have a place to stay, right?"

"Yeah! Yeah, I'm good."

"Ok, good."

"Yeah… well…bye" he turned back towards the police car and started walking. You stood at the doorway, watching him. You bit your lip before taking a breath.

"Yancy!" You called. He spun back towards you. You grin slightly. "Let's get coffee sometime." His eyes widened.

"O-Okay! Sure!" He agreed. You closed your door. He got back into the police car, smiling widely.

"So…" the officer started. Yancy turned to him.

"Hm?"

"That was the most Hallmark thing I've ever seen…"

"Shut up…"

"Seriously! That looked so cliche!"

"SHUT. UP."

"I thought I was about to hear some romantic violin,"

"Please just drive…"

GOD this SUCKS I'm so sorry

#ahwm #ahwm yancy #a heist with markiplier #a heist with markiplier yancy #yancy #yancy iplier #yancy the prisoner #yancy x reader #yancy x male!reader #yancy x female!reader #yancy x gender neutral!reader #yancy x y/n #male reader #female reader #gender neutral reader

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cactusstree · 4 years

Text

1994 v.s. 2019: My Thoughts On The New Little Women Adaptation

Before I start, I would like to say this is a VERY biased review, it is not meant to be objective. I have always loved the 1994 Little Women, and I definitely went into the theater knowing that I would still prefer it. I absolutely enjoyed the new adaptation and I’m sure I will be watching it again in the future, but there are certain things that I feel just can’t be changed about the original.

Jo March

Going into the theater, i had low expectations of Saorise's portrayl of Jo simply because i think Winona Ryder cannot be beat. I still prefer Winona, but i was pleasantly surprised with Saorise. I felt Saorise really captured Jo's tomboyish personality, when I was afraid she would not. I was happy to see Jo's masculine costuming; it seems Gerwig was able to "get away" with more gender nonconformity than the first movie could.

Jo March+ Laurie

In terms of Jo and Laurie's relationship, I have mixed feelings. In the 1994 version, it seemed as though Jo was certain in her feelings towards Laurie. Although it pained her to lose a dear friendship, she never really regretted it besides "I shouldn't turn down perfectly good marriage proposals." In 2019, however, Jo seemed much more indecisive after the two characters argument after Meg's wedding. It appeared that she may actually love Laurie romantically. I felt this was inconsistent, especially because 2019 Jo was much more aggressive in her first refusal, even to the extent that I was hoping Gerwig might actually allow Jo to be a lesbian (as we all know she is). Jo even said something along the lines of "I wish I had those feelings towards you but I don't," which is what got my hopes up.

Personally, I have always felt that Jo made the correct decision in turning down Laurie, as I picture their relationship to be more similar to brother and sister.

Jo March+ Friedrich

I have to say I was very disappointed with this movie's Friedrich. While of course I would prefer that Jo end up independent, we all know that is not going to happen. Therefore, I want her to end up with her intellectual equal, and someone who genuinely cares about her. In 1994, it is firmly established that Friedrich is dirt poor, and has many similar interests to Jo. On the other hand, 2019 only hints at Friedrich's poverty, and makes little to no effort in making him a lovable character; there are only a few interactions shown between him and Jo, and none of them really struck me as anything special. For instance, 2019 Friedrich offers Jo a set of Shakespeare's complete works, and while this is certainly a kind gesture, it doesn't really showthat they have much in common besides a love of literature. In 1994, Friedrich and Jo have an entire conversation about trancendentalism, not only establishing that they have more specific interests in common, but also showing that Jo's parents, while poor, are deeply involved in political and intellectual movements.

I really missed the tender 1994 moment where Friedrich invites Jo to an opera, which we know she has always wanted to attend, and they kiss in the "worst" seat in the theater. Friedrich was not able to afford nice seats, but he wanted Jo to have the opera experience, as he knew she would love it. In 2019, Friedrich simply observes Jo enjoying the opera while he sits in a nice seat and she stands, once again not really establishing any sort of connection between the two.

1994 Friedrich's criticisms of Jo's writing seem genuine. They come from a place of "you are talented and you write entertaining stories, but they don't seem to really come from your heart." Of course, Jo is offended at first but she comes to realize that she needs to write about her family, not just adventure stories. Therefore, Friedrich's criticisms are actually constructive and help Jo along her path. 2019 Friedrich really only says "I don't like it" which doesn't help Jo at all, and then it seems like she had to humble herself and stop being offended? Once again, this doesn't make any sense. Jo had every right to be offended when this man she barely knows starts criticising her life's work with no helpful suggestions. I felt that tension was never really resolved.

And of course, Jo and Friedrich's final scene where they kiss in the rain will always hold a special place in my heart. I love the 1994 version of course because it's simply beautiful. I love the fact that two of them are alone in the rain on the pathway leaving Orchard house. I didn't really enjoy the train station setting as much because it felt less special, especially when they're surrounded by people. Also, the 2019 version just quickly went over one of my favorite moments, when Friedrich says "I have nothing to give you, my hands are empty" (which of course in more powerful in 1994 because of how strongly Friedrich's poverty is established) and Jo responds by holding his hands and saying "not empty now."

This moment was included in 2019, but it didn't feel as special to me.

I think Gerwig tried to make up for Friedrich's characterization by showing that LM Alcott would prefer that Jo ended up a spinster, but I just don't think this was the right way to go. Like I said, I would like Jo to be independent as well, but if she does end up with a man I would like to feel happy for her. Gerwig's juxtaposition between Alcott getting her book published and Jo's moment with Friedrich was clever, but it took me out of the moment and made the last few scenes much less enjoyable.

Marmee

I felt 2019 focused much less on Marmee, which was disappointing to me. That isn't to say Laura Dern did a poor job, just that I have a closer connection to Susan Sarandon. There were several more scenes in 1994 that included Marmee, so I think the audience has more time to become attatched to her. Also, I didn't like that there were a few sarcastic quips between Marmee and the father (such as when father March jokes that he should move to California? I just didn't quite get that).

Mr. Laurence

Something I will say I prefer about 2019 is the emphasis on Mr. Laurence. I LOVED seeing his close friendship with Beth, especially the scene where he listens to her play the piano in his home, and later when he and Jo enter Orchard House together after Beth's death. I felt his inclusion helped Beth seem more significant.

Chronology

While I understand what Gerwig was trying to do with the way she ordered the scenes, I think chronological order is the best way to go. I liked that 2019 ordering was able to make some interesting parallels between the girl's childhood and young adulthood, such as Beth's first and last illnesses, Amy's relationship with Laurie, Jo's childhood at Orchard House and her later return. The problem I have, however, is that the constant scene switching made it more difficult to connect with the characters. One of the reasons we as an audience care so much about the girl's adulthood is because we saw them being foolish, we saw the way they care for one another, etc. This is especially apparent in Laurie's character, because he's kind of an asshole in young adulthood. In 1994, we put up with that because he is so charming in the first half of the movie. In 2019, not much is convincing me that I like Laurie as a character until we're further into the movie. It also took away from the audience's view of Beth. In 1994, we are relieved that she survives the first wave of scarlet fever, and that relief makes her later death more powerful. In 2019, her first and second waves of illness are depicted simultaneously, which makes it difficult for the audience to calm down. For me, this just meant a full ten minutes of tears streaming down my face, I never got a break!

Amy

Listen, I loved Florence Pugh as Amy, but I really really wish they had a younger actress to depict her as a child. I don't mean this as an insult towards Pugh, because I think she did a wonderful job, it was just incredibly difficult for me to believe she was the youngest child during their childhood scenes.

Amy+ Laurie

I have never really loved that Amy and Laurie ended up together, but their 2019 relationship felt even less resolved than 1994. One of the things that helped their 1994 relationship is the moment where Amy is being sent away due to Beth's illness and she laments (in her overdramatic fashion) to Laurie that she has never been kissed. Laurie promises her that he will kiss her before she dies. This sets up a potential for their romantic relationship, and establishes that they both care for one another. In 2019, it isn't really confirmed that Laurie cares for Amy more that her sister. In 1994, Laurie and Amy have a full conversation about how Amy doesn't want to be loved for her family, but rather for being herself, Larie then has to get his act straight and prove to her that he really does love her for who she is. In 2019, they have this same conversation but it never felt completed. It seemed like Amy just gave in, especially because she was so distraught about her sister's death. I will say that I loved 2019 Amy's moment where she explains marriage is very much an economic agreement for women, as I feel that was important to acknowlege in their time period.

1994 Jo's reaction to their marriage also felt like more of a resolution. She seems genuinely happy for them. That isn't to say that 2019 Jo isn't happy for them either, but she is clearly more upset and hasn't finished moving on.

Cineamatography

It is difficult for me to compare 1994 and 2019 in this aspect, as I genuinely loved both. I think 1994 focused more on details and domestic scenery, whereas 2019's landscape shots were more impressive. For instance, I loved that Gerwig included a scene at the beach because it was simply beautiful, and gave the audience something new to look at. The ice skating scenes and the scene right after Meg's wedding were really lovely in my opinion. However, I vastly prefer 1994's depiction of Orchard House. It just seems so much more inviting to me.

(I can't find a good picture of 2019 Orchard House, though I have heard it is more closely modeled to LM Alcott's actual home, so that is something, I just didn't really like it)

I thought these scenes were beautifully framed, I loved it!

Costuming

I absolutely loved the costuming in 2019, especially Jo's writing coat!

Soundtrack

1994 soundtrack makes me weep tears of joy and nostalgia every time I hear it. 2019 doesn't even come close.

#mine #sorry this is SO LONG #feel free to disagree with me! i would love to discuss #little women #little women 2019 #little women 1994 #greta gerwig

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thinkingisadangerouspastime · 5 years

Text

to be selfish

(in which plans are ruined, sparks fly, and selfish, selfish choices are made)

based on this prompt by @alltheprettygirlsintheworld!

id also like to thank @alltheprettygirlsintheworld for always reblogging my writing and leaving kind comments!! your support means the world to me 💕 i hope this fic is at least somewhat like what you were looking for!

~*~

Everything that could have possibly gone wrong had gone wrong.

Luck of the devil, Crowley supposed, though by that he meant he had the worst luck in history.

The picnic had been rained out, the Bentley had broken down, and even after miracling the poor car back into shape, Crowley and Aziraphale had gotten stuck in a line of traffic that hadn't moved whatsoever in the past fifteen minutes.

Worst of all, Crowley's plan had also been completely and utterly ruined. 6000 years of waiting washed down the drain. Quite literally, too.

Damn thunderstorm.

Needless to say, the demon was not in a cheerful mood.

"I'm sorry," Aziraphale murmured. An open book was resting on his lap, though even out of the corner of his eye Crowley could tell the angel wasn't reading it.

He sighed. "Not your fault. Last I checked, angel, you can't control the weather."

"I'm not talking about that. I mean, I am sorry it rained." Aziraphale closed his book after tucking a bookmark between the pages. "I'm sorry you're so disappointed, my dear. I know how much effort you put into planning this. Finding the right spot, and preparing the food yourself and all." His chewed on his lip. "Is there anything I can do, or say to - to cheer you up?"

Crowley chuckled, leaning back into his seat and turning to offer the angel a soft smile. Traffic wouldn't be moving anytime soon. He could afford to take his eyes off the road for a few seconds. "You can agree to come on a picnic with me whenever it's not raining."

Aziraphale beamed at him, and Crowley's heart jumped into his throat, as it so often did when his angel smiled. "That sounds lovely, my dear. I'd be delighted to join you again."

Crowley absentmindedly tapped his fingers on the steering wheel as the conversation passed. He frowned. "You do know, angel, that you don't have to apologize for anything. I should be the one saying sorry for not checking the weather report before we left."

A tiny smile crept onto Aziraphale's lips. "I suppose we're both apologizing for things we don't need to, then."

"I guess we are."

Silence fell between them. The Bentley inched forward as rain pattered softly on the roof. Lightning flashed a brilliant purple in the sky, followed by a deep echo of thunder.

Aziraphale finally said with a huff, "Oh, just spill it, Crowley. It is not like you to be so - so mute when it comes to a few cancelled plans. Especially something like this. What are on Earth are you not telling me?"

Crowley's grip tightened on the steering wheel. This was not a topic he wanted to discuss. Not now, at least. Not without preparation. He didn't dare turn to look at Aziraphale. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"My dear, you are radiating dejection. It's almost smothering! Why can't you just be honest with -" Aziraphale cut himself off with a shuddering sigh. When he spoke again, his voice was even. Gentle. "Please. Tell me what's wrong."

Crowley's gaze remained steadfast on the road in front of him. "Nothing's wrong. I would tell you if there was a problem."

"Oh, please. You wouldn't. You never talk about your feelings. Not with me."

Crowley stiffened so sharply at the angel's words that he nearly snapped off part of the steering wheel.

"Good Lord!" Aziraphale exclaimed, startled by his abrupt reaction. "What was that all about?"

Crowley didn't respond, praying the angel wouldn't connect the dots.

(Then again, since when had God ever listened to his prayers?)

"Feelings," Aziraphale murmured. He blushed. "I'm going to make an educated guess, my dear, that you were planning to talk about... Our relationship."

Crowley bit back a sigh. Now it wasn't even worth trying to change the subject. "Maybe." He shrugged. "Not like it matters anymore." A lie. "Don't know if you noticed, angel, but whatever I might or might not have planned has gone to shit now."

Aziraphale chuckled. "It's not that bad." He reached over, gently cupping Crowley's cheek before slowly turning the demon's head to face him. "Look at me, my dear."

Crowley was distinctly aware of how red his face had to be. Extremely embarrassing. "But traffic -"

"- won't be moving for another hour. We both know that."

He hated it when the angel had a point. He sighed, reluctantly taking his hands off the steering wheel and turning so his body also faced Aziraphale. "Okay. I'm looking at you."

"Now tell me what you planned to say at the picnic."

Crowley exhaled, though it sounded more like a hiss. "I can't."

Aziraphale frowned. "Why not?"

"I just can't, angel!" he snapped. "I don't know what the hell I was going to say." Not entirely a lie. He didn't have a speech prepared or anything. All he'd wanted to do was hold the angel's hand and - and see what happened after that.

He couldn't risk going too fast.

Aziraphale softened. He had an uncanny way of knowing when the demon was being honest. "Alright. Then I'll tell you what I planned to say."

Calling that an unexpected reply would have been an understatement. Crowley somehow managed to nod in response.

Aziraphale fiddled with his pinky ring, taking a deep breath before he began. "I know that you love me, my dear, though I also know you would never allow yourself to admit that out loud. I can feel your love. I've felt it since - well, since the beginning, I suppose. But I have never said that I love you, dear boy. And since there's no time like the present..." He bit his lip. "I love you, too, Crowley. So very, very much. And I have for far longer than I dare to admit."

Inside, Crowley was already aware of this. He couldn't detect love like angels could, but he was no idiot. And Aziraphale had never been good at hiding his feelings. Eyes were windows to the soul, after all.

"And - And I'm sure you're wondering why I waited so long to say anything," Aziraphale continued. "But I was afraid, Crowley! Afraid of what Hell would do to you if they ever found out about - about us." He stared at the demon, and Crowley's heart clenched as he saw tears glistening in the angel's eyes. "For me... I knew that if I Fell, I Fell. So be it. But for you the only consequence would have been complete destruction! I couldn't risk that something horrible happened to you because of my - because of my selfishness."

Crowley raised an eyebrow. "Your selfishness?"

Aziraphale managed a weak laugh. "Yes. Me, selfishly wanting to be with you. To be able to love you without worrying about any of the consequences. Just... Us."

Crowley didn't know how to respond. Or maybe it was the lump in his throat that prevented him from speaking. Either way, he was silent.

"But I've had enough of the - the bullshit from our head offices. I'm allowed to be selfish every once in a while! And I don't care if that makes me unangelic!" Aziraphale reached out to take Crowley's hands in his. "I'm ready to go as fast as you want, Crowley. Anywhere you go, from Earth to Alpha Centauri, I will be there. With you. Even if that means you end up driving this blasted car a hundred miles over the speed limit."

Crowley chuckled, squeezing the angel's hands. Everything he'd ever wanted to hear was finally being said, but now that the moment had come, he could hardly process it. "Angel," he finally whispered, "I think... I think I might be in love with you."

Aziraphale laughed, freeing one of his hands to reach up and wipe away tears trickling down his face. "Think? My dear, I know you are."

Time stood still as Crowley took off his sunglasses and tossed them into an empty cupholder before slowly leaning towards Aziraphale, his head tilted, eyes shut, and his lips parted ever so slightly -

Then he hesitated.

There is no "our side"!

I don't even like you!

You go too fast for me, Crowley.

He couldn't do it.

"Dammit," he muttered, letting his head fall and come to rest on the angel's shoulder. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," was Aziraphale's reply before he lifted Crowley's chin and closed the distance between them.

The kiss was gentle. Tender. And hesitant, neither wanting to rush the other. It was a kiss filled with patience and 6000 years of waiting, a kiss burning with passion and 6000 years of longing. Perhaps there was even a bit of temptation.

(Who was doing the tempting, well, neither could say.)

The kiss was broken when the car behind them blared its horn, startling the both of them.

"Bastard," Crowley muttered as he drove the Bentley less than a car-length forward. "As if moving up five feet really makes a difference."

Aziraphale chuckled. "Humans always have places to be and things to do."

"Yeah, well, if he really needs to be somewhere, he might as well get out of his car and start walking."

"I suppose we're lucky we don't have plans."

Crowley snorted. "You may not have plans, angel, but I do."

Aziraphale raised an eyebrow. "Really? What plans do you have?"

Crowley smirked. "I was planning to convince you to be selfish and kiss me again. Preferably more than once."

Aziraphale rolled his eyes, though Crowley didn't miss the small smile dancing on his lips. "Oh, you're ridiculous."

"Mm. I know. And you love it."

"Well..." He chuckled. "Yes, I suppose I do."

(Although, as it turned out, his angel didn't need much convincing. It was also no coincidence that the Bentley started to play "Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy" on repeat - and refused to stop. Some things, it seemed, were simply fated to be. A little selfishness never did harm anyone, after all.)

~*~

#me? inspired by fruits basket? it's more likely than you think #good omens #ineffable husbands #aziraphale #anthony j crowley #anthony crowley #good omens fanfiction #good omens fic #amy writes #to be selfish #this was so soft™️ to write

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fandom-collective-writers · 5 years

Text

Title: "Till Death do us Part"

Characters: Soryu Oh

A/N: This is my first KBTBB fic. I'd like to thank @voltage-vixen for encouraging me to write it. @soryuwifeyxx, I hope you like this .

Written by @rikumorimachisgirl

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You sat by the window of your bedroom in the Employees Dormitory of the Tres Spades, watching the rain as it drenched the earth in the early hours of the day. Your gaze shifted from the window to the calendar on the wall, and you felt your chest tighten when you read the date today.

You sighed and silently cursed yourself for letting this affect you. But then, how could it not - it was a year ago today that you took his last name and became one.

'Come to think of it, it rained last year, too, ' you quietly mused, as you heard the pitter-patter of raindrops on your window. With a bittersweet smile on your face, you allowed yourself to think back to your wedding, and the vows he once made.

"I join my life with yours…"

It was a wedding befitting Mafia royalty, and

despite the rain, all the people that mattered to the two of you came to celebrate your special day. Everything from the lavish venue that was decked out with thousands of white roses, the two-meter high wedding cake to your bespoke designer wedding dress and five-carat diamond wedding ring had nobility written all over it.

This day couldn't be more perfect - you exchanged vows with Soryu in a traditional ceremony, and your apprehension about the guests not mixing well vanished when you saw your family being entertained by no less than your husband's best friends, and the Ice Dragons socializing with your friends.

'I'm really Soryu's wife now, ' you beamed silently, as guests started addressing you as Mrs. Oh, and wishing you'd start a family as soon as possible. The thought of having babies made you blush, and you sipped your wine to hide your embarrassment.

"Someone's spacing out." Your husband's voice shook you from your daydream, and soon you felt his hand close over yours. "Are you okay, baby?"

You turned your attention to the handsome man beside you. Dressed in a long black silk Changshan over his dress pants, with his hair slicked back, Soryu looked even more handsome than you had ever thought possible. As you continued to thank your lucky stars at having married such a wonderful man, he leaned closer and stole a kiss from you.

"You looked like you were waiting for a kiss, " he whispered and you felt your face flush. "Am I wrong?"

"No, but we're in public -"

"Ah, that's right. We're at a wedding - our wedding - so that means I get to kiss you whenever I want to." He smirked and leaned closer once more to capture your lips.

You blushed furiously and attempted to escape, but the tinkling of glasses resounded across the reception hall. At the corner of your eye, you could see Ota and Baba leading the crowd in requesting to see the couple kiss.

Soryu shrugged and looked at you. "We can't disappoint our guests, can we?"

You straightened up and took a deep breath. "I suppose we can't, " you responded and closed your eyes, anticipating his kiss.

Smiling, he admired you for a bit. He's always found you beautiful - in fact, it was your quiet beauty that beckoned him to bid for you on the night you were auctioned off at the Tres Spades - but today, you were as bright as the Sun, and he simply couldn't look away. Just before he brushed your lips with his, he whispered, "I promise you that I'll make you the happiest woman in the world."

"Wherever you will go, I will go. Whatever you will face, I will face…"

You straighten up the life-size wedding portrait that the photographer delivered to your home yesterday. It's been three months since the wedding, and immediately after that, Soryu had been called upon to help win over a rogue Italian Mafia group, whose leader recently passed away.

You sighed, as the memory of how your brief honeymoon in Ibiza was cut short after that call he received from the Ice Dragons faction in Sicily.

'This won't take long, baby. I'll be home soon, ' he promised, as he sent you off to Japan. Since then, you'd devoted your time in making his condominium unit look and feel like home. Days turned into weeks, and his calls had become less frequent and shorter.

'But I chose this life, ' you reminded yourself, as you went about cleaning, making an extra effort to ensuring that it smells fresh. Today was a special day - today's the day he was coming home.

The doorbell rang, and you made a mad dash for the door. You paused briefly to smooth out your dress. 'This is it! He's finally home! ' you thought silently, as you felt a flurry in your tummy. You realized you missed him more than you thought, and you wanted nothing more than to fly into his arms. Flashing a bright smile, you turned the handle and opened the door excitedly.

"Ryosuke?"

"Princess!" Soryu's faithful henchman greeted with a warm smile on his face.

"Come in, come in, " you said, stepping aside to make way for the young man to enter your house carrying what looked like an expensive package.

"What brings you here?"

"Princess, " he said, tentatively. "Boss sent me here to tell you in person that he's a little caught up in the negotiations between the Ice Dragons, Crimson Swords, and La Squadra…"

"Oh."

Your husband's henchman started to fidget. Perhaps that came out sadder than you let on, so you immediately gave him a smile. "Those negotiations sure take up a lot of time, huh?"

Those words may have worked wonders because you noticed Ryosuke relax a bit. "Yes. Right now, both groups still don't trust each other so we're not even allowed to bring phones inside the neutral territory. Anyway, the Boss wanted to make sure you were alright and he wanted me to give this to you, too."

You stared at the paper bag he held in front of you, wishing it was Soryu offering it to you instead.

"Princess?"

"Oh, sorry, " you said, as soon as you returned to your senses, and took the bag from him. "Are you going back to Italy?"

"Yeah, I leave in an hour. I just flew in to give you this, and to tell you that Boss said he'll fly to you as soon as this is over."

"Please tell Soryu to take care of himself, Ryosuke, " you said before he left.

"I will, Princess."

Sighing, you opened the paper bag and took out a box with a note attached to it.

'I'm sorry this is taking a while, but I'll be home soon. I'd like you to pick our most beautiful wedding picture and put it on this frame. Keep it by your bedside, so you won't forget. I love you, baby. Thank you for marrying me.'

You traced his lovely calligraphy with your finger. You saw that one of the words had blotted, followed by another and yet another. Suddenly, your vision was clouded, and you simply allowed your tears to fall.

"For good or ill, in happiness and in sadness, come riches or poverty…"

You quickly made your way through the crowd at the Emergency Room of the prestigious Medical Center in Milan, scouring the area for Ota, Eisuke, or anyone who could point you to where your husband was. They were staying at the Tres Spades in London when they received the fateful call from Ryosuke and made their way to Italy right away.

"Hey, over here."

You spun around as soon as you heard Ota's voice and you felt someone tug your arm. "Come with me, " he said, as he held your hand and led you to the VIP Emergency Section, where Eisuke, Baba, Mamoru, and Luke were waiting.

"Lovely Bones, I'm so glad you're here, " Luke greeted you as soon as you arrived.

You nodded solemnly at the English doctor and then turned to Eisuke. "Thank you for sending your private jet."

The businessman shrugged. "Soryu's in stable condition now. I had to authorize his surgery, otherwise he -"

"Now, now, Boss, " Baba cut in. "She's just arrived and here you are scaring her."

"Sor's in stable condition now. Eisuke made sure of that, " Luke said, reassuringly. "Come, he's in this room."

It was the first time you're seeing him after six months of being away, and this was not the reunion you had in mind. You steeled yourself, as Luke gestured for you to follow him, but nothing prepared you for what you were about to see. In a spacious room laid your husband, surrounded by machines and tubes of all sorts. Your heart pounded with each step you took towards him.

"Soryu, " you whispered, as you run your fingers through his hair.

"One of the Squadra henchmen attacked before Soryu and their interim leader signed the agreement." You heard Eisuke speak from behind. "He was said to have been opposed to forming an alliance with the Ice Dragons from the start, so he open-fired. Their leader was killed on the spot, and Jin is in critical condition as we speak."

You tried to block the images of the bloodshed in what was supposed to be neutral territory for all the Mafia groups worldwide. Leaning forward, you planted a kiss on Soryu's forehead. "I'm so glad you're alive, my love, " you said quietly to your still unconscious husband before you turned your attention to his childhood friend. "Thank you for making sure he gets treated right away, Eisuke."

"He's not gonna be happy you're here - at least, that's what he's going to say, " Eisuke casually said.

"I know. He's gonna say I'm exposing myself to danger, " you mused, as you twined your fingers with Soryu's. "But it's a risk I'm willing to take because this is the life I chose."

From where he was standing, you could see him smirk. "I see you've grown much braver. Now, you sound like the wife of a Mafia Boss."

"That's because I am the wife of a Mafia Boss, " you retorted, before turning your attention back to your husband, whispering promises you hoped he would hear.

"I take you as my life partner, and will give myself to no other…"

He sent you back to Japan a week after he was discharged from the hospital. It's been a month since you saw him. Back in the comfort of your lifeless condominium, you sat by your lonesome and poured yourself a drink. 'He only has my best interest in mind, ' you said to yourself as you took a sip of your wine.

You heard the doorbell and wondered who would visit you past midnight. Nonetheless, you walked to the door to check.

"Ota?"

"Hey, I was in the area, and I thought I'd check on you."

You rolled your eyes in disbelief, almost sure that Soryu put him through this. "Well, mission accomplished. Tell my husband I'm doing okay, " you said, a lot harsher than you intended, and made to close the door.

"Woah, Woah… wait just a minute there, " the handsome blond said smoothly, as he blocked the door and snuck in. "You don't exactly sound okay. Have you been drinking?"

"Just leave me be, Ota. You know your way out," you dismissed, walking away from him.

"On the contrary, maybe I'll join you."

"Suit yourself."

He followed you to the makeshift bar, and you poured him a drink, silently wishing the time would pass quickly. Three bottles of wine later, you had moved from the bar to the couch, where you were currently resting your head on his lap while he gently combed it with his fingers.

The grandfather clock struck six times, and you both trained your eyes on it. "It's six in the morning?"

"Damn, we stayed up all night, " he said before letting out a yawn. "I guess I better go."

He stopped combing your hair to help you sit up, and you immediately miss the warmth of his touch. Sensing your sudden mood change, Ota cupped your face with his hands and looked into your eyes. "Hey, wipe that frown from your face."

The sound of a gun cocking tore through the living room, and you both jumped apart. Standing by the entrance was a confused Ryosuke, and beside him was your husband.

"Soryu!"

He kept his eyes and his gun trained at Ota, so you turned to face him and took a step to block Ota from his line of sight. "Soryu, please -"

"I was just comforting her, Sor -"

"Is that what you call it these days?" Soryu mocked, as he stepped closer.

You continued to block Ota, even as your husband circled around you to get a better aim. "This is not what you think it is, Soryu. Stop threatening to shoot Ota -"

"Oh? Were you expecting another kind of reaction after seeing your wife with another man?"

"I already told you that it's not what you think. Ota came by last night to check on me because he probably thought I could use some company, " you started, not breaking eye contact with the intimidating Ice Dragon Boss you married. "And you know what, I didn't realize just how lonely I was until last night."

Your cutting words made him waver. He lowered his gun slowly but kept his gaze shot at the man behind you. "Inui, " he called out to his loyal henchman without looking over his shoulder. "Take Ota to the Tres Spades and proceed to headquarters after. My wife and I have things to discuss."

You held your breath, as you watched Ryosuke escort a weary-looking Ota away from you. As soon as the door closed, you felt your inhibitions slip away.

"You were lonely?"

"You expected otherwise?"

"But I called you whenever I can -"

You sighed and rolled your eyes. "That's it?" We're married, Soryu - we've been married for seven months, for goodness sakes - but do you know how much time we've actually spent together? About twenty days - half of which you were unconscious."

His face was devoid of any emotion, as he stood in silence, watching your outburst. You've seen this face so many times in the years you've been together - it was the face he wore when he was unsure of what to say. But that wasn't what you needed. Right now, you wanted to argue - you needed him to talk to you, to counter what you say or challenge your opinion.

"You knew what you were getting into when you married me, " he said, and you took a sharp breath.

He may as well shoot you without warning, you thought as you felt your tears dampen your cheeks. As images of how you spent your days by your lonesome filled your head, you started to accept that you will never take the top spot in his life - and that this is not the life you want to choose.

"I'm sorry, " he said, as he held your arms tenderly.

"No. I'm sorry, " you said, as you broke away from his hold and took a step back. Taking a deep breath, you removed your wedding band and placed it in his hand. "I can't do this anymore, " you told him, as you closed your hand over his. "I need someone who will choose me over everything else, and clearly, that person isn't you."

You forced a smile on your face as you stared into his eyes, burning his image in your mind one last time. "I'm sorry I couldn't stay with you after all. I won't care to pack my things since you bought most of it for me anyway. We can ask our lawyers to talk about our divorce."

As you started to turn, you felt him grip your wrist tightly. "Baby, I love you. Please don't go, he pleaded as you struggled to break free. "Please don't walk out the door -"

He sobbed unabashedly behind you, and you felt your heart pounding wildly. You wanted to throw yourself in his arms, but you knew that wouldn't change anything. You and his Mafia family were equals, and you will never win over them.

Taking a deep breath, you turned the knob open and stepped out the door.

"Till death do us part."

It's been five months since you last saw him. He made no move to see you or respond to your divorce letter. When you were offered your old job at the Tres Spades, you made sure of two things - that he wasn't made aware and that you do not run into him - conditions that Eisuke and Mr. Kenzaki had no problems complying with, and you spent your days cleaning guest rooms and banquet halls to pass the time. On some days it was easy to forget you were ever married, and some days are harder than others.

Today was one of them. You sighed wearily and allowed yourself to think of what would have been. Just this once.

You would have been married for a year today, you mused as you fix your eyes on your left ring finger. Today, he would have probably brought you to the Louvre or made arrangements to close Versailles for a day just for the two of you and make love to you in every room in the palace.

You wiped your tears and took a few deep breaths to calm yourself down. Outside, you saw the rain continued to pour, as though consoling you for your loss.

'It's over. We're over, ' you said, as you wrapped your arms around yourself.

A rap on your door distracted you from your thoughts. You frowned and strained to listen to the sound you heard, wondering if someone just bumped against your door.

But there it was again - knock, knock - and you rose from your bed to see who it was.

You opened the door and gasped. Standing outside was Soryu, in his usual grey suit, with his hair slicked back. He cradled the biggest bouquet of Ecuadorian roses you've ever seen, and you pinched yourself to check if you were dreaming or not.

"You're really here, " you heard him say.

"That's my line, " you retorted as you watched him walk inside your room. "What are you doing here?"

"I needed to see you, " he said casually, before showing you the bouquet he was holding. "And I wanted you to have these."

"Why?"

"Because it's our one-year anniversary."

"But we're over -"

"Oh? I don't remember signing my consent to the divorce. In fact, I just thought you needed a little time to cool off from our first big fight."

You rolled your eyes and held the bouquet close to you. "A little time? What's so little about five months?"

"I was scared because I've never seen you so upset before because of me, " he said. "But when I saw the divorce papers, I was devastated. I knew I had to talk about it and win you back, but I didn't know where to find you."

"How did you find me? Eisuke and Mr. Kenzaki promised…"

"Ota may have slipped me a note or two, " he confessed, as he reached out to hold your hand and peered into your face. "Baby, I love you. I can't live without you."

"I missed you, Soryu, " you start to sob and he pulled you in for a hug. "I really thought you'd given upon us."

"I wouldn't do that, " he said, his voice cracking. "I hadn't made good on all my promises, except for one. And I intend to continue keeping that promise."

"What promise is that?"

"Did you really forget?" He asked as he pulled away. The confusion on your face didn't go amiss, as you watched him fish something out of his pocket. Your eyes widen when you'd caught sight of the ring you'd given back to him.

"I love you, baby, " he said solemnly, as he slipped the gold band onto your finger just like he did a year ago. "Til death do us part."

The end.

#kissed by the baddest bidder #kbtbb fic #soryu oh #soryu x reader #kbtbb soryu

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punkscowardschampions · 4 years

Text

Ali & Tommy

Ali: [Let us assume he has gone back to school now and this was a weekend affair] Ali: You forgot your 🕯 Ali: expect it in the post, minus the disappointed note from Ro I've taken out Ali: ✈️ trips not guilt trips, welcome Tommy: leave it in, LOVE to hear what she's gotta say about why I'M the one being a holy show Ali: You aren't respecting the sanctity of her offering, is very much the point and gist Ali: she put more letters to it, as standard Tommy: 'course she did Ali: It does mean a lot to her Ali: but yeah, nice to have my 📅 to myself again, can't lie Tommy: meant so much she fucked off soon as the 🎂 candles were out Ali: You know she isn't the party 'til dawn sort Ali: anyway, they'd be coming in for morning service 😅 Tommy: I know it's her party & she can 😭 if she wants to Ali: If I'd known that was the theme, could've made party bags with 🧅 & 🧻 Ali: well, at least you were in your element 🕺 and you kept Meena and Carly entertained Ali: the hostess not being overly concerned herself, like Tommy: this family's hostess with the mostest has & always will be me, honey Tommy: what else do they teach me at this school, like? Ali: I had no idea you were at finishing school, my apologies Ali: how's things with keeping a man then, Holly Housewife? Tommy: Why stop at strutting with 📚 on our heads when we could do it in 🩰 perfectly en pointe, carrying a sulky ballerina all the while? Basically a Latin motto Tommy: & yet I still can't keep a man, cheers for the reminder Ali: Maybe now you're of age they introduce the final string to your bow Ali: quadruple threat = 🎤🕺🎭🍆 Tommy: 😂🤞🙏 Tommy: stole your girl regardless, tell her to call me when she's slept off the festivities Ali: No doubt she will when she's between the next couple of parties 😜 Ali: your girl is here actually, helping Ro 'organise' her presents Ali: dunno where she parked her 🎃 Tommy: I'll join Fraze in the red corner 😍💋💔🤬🎯👿🥤🤡🥵🛑💘 Tommy: those dolls do go walk abouts if you don't keep a 👀 but obviously she was 🤞🙏 I was still there Ali: He might misconstrue that and come to fight for her honour Ali: 🤞🙏 she's in LDN too, naturally Ali: lots of them are haunted, but that last part of your sentence there is the MOST 😱 ever Ali: it's weird when you approach anything fuck boy like Tommy: miscommunication is his thing™ no hard feels or feelings full stop, 'course 💪🚫😭🚫😍 Tommy: what can I say? being back DOES things to me Tommy: it's all the positive masculine role models this family has Ali: Guess it beats a total lack of @Joseph Ali: though he sent her some book about musical theory so he still manages to be the favourite somehow 🤷 Ali: and hey, dad is the best Tommy: v catty & then cuddly of you, Kit Tommy: he doesn't respond to MY efforts at being a daddy's girl exactly the same way somehow 🤷 Ali: we're both living up to what's expected then 😼 Ali: could just be I'm better at it than you though Ali: if your ego will allow it Tommy: can't let our sister fly that flag alone, like Tommy: as for who's better at kissing the arse of authority figures, don't need to dignify that with an answer 'cause my school report will Tommy: you ain't never been a pleasure to have in class Ali: I might genuinely have to shoot myself if anyone ever said anything so asinine about me so you're right Ali: that would be such a waste of potential, not until I've lead a more scandal-filled existence Tommy: you could respect the hustle Tommy: it's getting me 🩰 perks Tommy: disciplined is the head that wears the 👑 hoe Ali: I know all about discipline, trust me Tommy: we've all read 50 shades, you can't take it as gospel Tommy: Ro could write a better bdsm bibe when she's done at church Tommy: bible* Ali: It's all fun and games 'til I walk in on her flagellating herself Ali: how are we explaining that to the shrinks Tommy: that she misunderstood a more sexy f word? Ali: we don't want to look like we're trying to lock her up for that Ali: way too retro, bro Tommy: She wants to be catholic Tommy: I didn't make the rules Ali: No, then da really would hate you Ali: she's got worse Tommy: Yeah Tommy: I know, no amount of drama from the golden couple could detract Ali: not that I haven't heard enough about that though Ali: guess there's too much to put in a passive-aggressive note Tommy: 🙄🥱😴 Tommy: She wasn't even THAT late & tbh I wouldn't have blamed her for doing a Joe no show Ali: I would've understood if she was upset when she wasn't coming Ali: I am when Joe doesn't, whatever Ali: but I think she was actually MORE upset that she did come in the end, and not just because she was messy, but because Ro thought she wouldn't Ali: I don't get it, they're complicated, always have been but ??? Tommy: she can't hold being a good sister over her, like you can't me being the most fabulous brother in existence 🏆 Tommy: the fuck ups are more fun to bring to a 🥊 Ali: I guess that's more likely than them being all 💕💞 Ali: but fucking hell, does it hurt to hope Tommy: it's hurting you 😿 Tommy: she'll be too hangry to hope Ali: I have no hope or agenda for your 🏆 or 👑 dear brother Ali: but seriously Ali: what does she want Tommy: like you said ???? Tommy: there's every chance I'm bringing too much McKenna magic to the motives & she don't wanna bear a grudge til the end of her days Ali: because it doesn't sound like her at all Ali: if you can't be honest in the DMs where can you, eh, to quote that romcom Ali: fucked if I know what to do about it right now though Ali: maybe I need to sleep off the festivities, or get something to eat Tommy: long as you're not so hysterical you run into the path of an oncoming car, to recall another faithful role of hers Ali: have you adapted that for the stage? Ali: get 5 of you to be the 🚗 Tommy: dibs 'cause I can't do the accent Tommy: not that loads of 'em posh kids can either Ali: they'll have spent enough time gentrifying the east end to have it down, offensively so but all adds to the hysterics Tommy: I'll pitch it then 💡 Tommy: go down better than her 🎤🎵 Ali: better than her when she got hit by the car, like Ali: give me credit or I'll turn up and make a SCENE Tommy: like I wouldn't be LIVING for that Tommy: if we are being honest in the DMS Ali: I'll work on my RICKKAAAAAAAAAAAY Ali: maybe can convince Ro to be Sharon Tommy: hang around your ma in law & you'll ace it in no time Ali: Ha Ali: she'd accept Peggy, not Pat Tommy: fair, Laoise's ma's the one more likely to express herself with big earrings & animal prints Tommy: but I don't know if Sam Mitchell is a favourable role for Carls, what did she ever even do? Ali: Are you trying to tell me it's NOT a look? 🤔 Ali: or that you rate Laoise's mum? Ali: The character, nothing, the OG actress lost her nose so we're all agreed that's a no Tommy: I'd rate seeing her da on the doorstep in nothing but a bow tie for how mortified she'd be when I uploaded it Tommy: Grant's also no, he knocked Martine on her arse way before that car Tommy: but if she's Phil, you're Sharon so that's a yeah from me, like Ali: Don't, her dad always gave me those vibes Ali: and you ain't actually on the street still to have to witness that 🤮 Ali: I don't know how she'll feel about going bald, I'll float it gently before getting out the clippers Tommy: Do Rock's while you're there, he looks feral Tommy: even that nonce wouldn't have him Ali: You know his ears would get chapped Ali: hair is essential or he'll fly away on the breeze Ali: and we'd all be devastated, obvs Tommy: don't start me thinking about that scene in Dumbo, cheers very much Tommy: 😭😭😭😭😭😭 Ali: Such a depressing film Ali: disney gives me bad vibes Tommy: the park is creepy & you won't catch me there Tommy: whether or not Walt was a Nazi it's still a nah from me Ali: Wee bit concerning that emotional manipulation and forced fun trumps facism/literal Nazis for you but we'll 🤐 Ali: ma is in enough of a mood and she'll only direct it at me so nah Tommy: well his racism is disputed depending whether you're in camp 😇 saint him 🙏 or camp cast him into the hellfire 👿 Tommy: the forced fun & emotional manipulation is just facts Ali: 👿 advocate Tommy: I'm gonna go to hell 🤞 he's an ally Ali: 😬 Ali: it's a punishment, not a holiday Tommy: it'll be a grand hol for my pores Tommy: love a sauna sesh Ali: that London smog is not it Ali: how black is your snot? Tommy: as Ro's soul 💀 Ali: Thomas Tommy: Alison Ali: 🛑 it Tommy: she'd 🖤 to hear it but FINE Ali: you're an enabler, it is known Ali: not the kind of encouragement I'm after tah Tommy: enabling you & your lady love to have a good time, yeah 🕺💃 Tommy: & I fully expected her to turn up with a pet raven is all I'm saying Ali: the best was made of it by all, despite it all Ali: even her, in her way Tommy: despite Kayne appearing 🤵🥀 & all in her case Ali: yeah Ali: ugh Ali: he's harmless enough, bless him Tommy: she'd beg to differ right now Tommy: you're gonna wanna hide the 🍄🍄💀 til she calms down Ali: You don't need to tell me Ali: I think he's just really oblivious Ali: like all lads Ali: it wasn't you know...assaulty Tommy: It's not his fault she's team true love's kiss & he AIN'T it Tommy: who could EVER measure up to the 💭💞 Ali: standards, cool Ali: unrealistic expectations, less so Ali: but I can't really advocate for reality at this point in the game Tommy: You don't need to tell me, sis Ali: you're team turn-a-stage-kiss-real, yeah Ali: it's more realistic than fairytales, anyway, look at strictly Tommy: I'm team when's my life been a shitty made for netflix flick never mind a 🐸🤴📖 Tommy: crushing realism ftw Ali: 💔 Ali: If you didn't have a tragic love-life to complain about, you'd be too insufferable 🤴💩 Tommy: comforting Tommy: I'd HATE to morph into Fraze of a few years back Ali: I'll let you know if you start getting freckles Tommy: I'd know if I woke up with those brows Tommy: nowhere to hide, like Ali: 👺 Tommy: 😂 Ali: What are you getting ma for her bday/have you got already (suckup) Tommy: I left it there if you wanna find & shake the 🎁 Ali: Wow, you really didn't wanna pay postage that bad huh Ali: I'll see if I can 🔮 Tommy: with what? I'm skint after buying hers & Ro's Tommy: & it'll be 🎅🎄🎁 before too long Ali: that's what people really mean when they say dance don't pay Ali: gifting an interpretive dance is nothing but pretentious and unwelcome Ali: I can bodge together however many crafts I need and save my dolla Tommy: been there, tried that one Tommy: so much for your so called genius Tommy: ain't even thought of earning any by busting out the 🎅🎄🎵 classics for a busking sesh, works with 🩰 too I'll have you know Ali: 'til you knock over an old lady and have to leg it, like Ali: and if you hadn't noticed, I've been a little busy making a replica Ro, tah Ali: my creative juices are juiced right now Tommy: I'll make it look like part of the show & have the punters eating out of my palm when I catch & twirl any 👵 before they touch ground Tommy: yeah well you've got time from now, fair game on all things yule from Nov 1st Ali: 👌👌 clearly the LDN ones are more receptive because they're vicious 'round here with their 👜s and I'm only trying to give them the tea they ordered Ali: if ANYONE should advocate for Christmas not dragging, like Tommy: it's Irish dancing or fuck all back there, 365 🌧 or ⛅ Tommy: little girls scam every bit of that trade Ali: ironic when it's catch these hands in every other aspect Ali: so you'll fit right in, eh Ali: feel traumatised yet? Tommy: I'll do my best, as ever Ali: 🤴 Ali: meanwhile ma will have to make do with whatever IOU present I can knock up Ali: maybe I'll babysit, that's never not gonna work Tommy: she was on about going out 🍽 wasn't she? Tommy: Carls will never not be down either Ali: get him to make her a cake Ali: sorted Ali: providing he washes his hands...a full hose down may be necessary actually Tommy: she's survived the 🧁 he brings back from school & we've all seen the state of him at day's end Ali: yeah, cheers for the immunity boost little 🦠 Ali: fair, I'm pretty sure we put some weird and wonderful things into our bakes at his age and no one died Ali: Laoise nearly but you know Tommy: close but no 🚬 Tommy: typical of that bitch Ali: sure a 🙏 was said to finish the job at mass Tommy: if you see her ma mascara running in an lbd, I demand to be the first to know Ali: I'll pap her in her time of distress, it's fine Ali: I can hide up trees for HOURS if needs must Tommy: I'm not above piggybacking on the 'tragedy' to get better grades or a hol Tommy: do your part, like Ali: she won't fall for 🍄 again Ali: her brother might if Ro puts 'em in her gob Tommy: 💞 Ali: more of a mood than without Ali: add a little danger Tommy: she'd appreciate the drama more than anything he could ever do Ali: 💔 Tommy: nah, we're not shipping that Tommy: not today Ali: You gotta make some bad decisions before you make the right ones Tommy: a bad decision was the colour of her 👗 Tommy: the last thing that girl needs is a boy right now Ali: Okay you can't come for anyone vis a vis colour, boy Ali: even if I still see it when I close my eyes after however many weeks sewing Ali: but you may have a point re. a boy Ali: just, some socialisation wouldn't hurt Ali: and as far as they go, he's harmless Tommy: 'Course I do, she can barely exist in front of us Tommy: if they went on a date, what's she gonna do, order a glass of water? Ali: like you haven't seen her fake eat a plate of food Ali: it's only noticeable to all us that she's not actually putting any in her mouth Tommy: 🔮✨ Tommy: if he's TRULY harmless he don't deserve to be harmed by her attitude Tommy: which anyone else not bound by family love & loyalty would call something loads harsher Ali: Don't Ali: I feel bad enough for Meena sometimes Tommy: @ Carly too & we all know it Ali: Yeah, Carly can handle it though, she's mostly unphased even if it is a total thing 🙄 Tommy: She's a 👸😇 I doubt Kayne is that pure of ❤️ or intentions tbh Tommy: & Meena can handle anything so Ali: he's deffo a virgin though Ali: which yes, makes for more desperation, but he can't be that forceful if he dunno what he wants, you know Ali: yeah but God knows why she wants to come 'round here and get more of it at times Tommy: No shit, Kit but everyone's seen a porno, it's not the 70s Tommy: dress for it all you like Tommy: maybe she wants to get out of her own 🏡 Ali: everyone also knows it's bullshit Ali: whatever else she's got that much about her Tommy: does he though? Tommy: all I'm saying Ali: either way, it isn't like she's going to have a miraculous change of heart Ali: we all saw how well it went Tommy: Yeah but what if it makes her heart set on finding someone else to play 🤴 Tommy: you'd know better than me what goes on in her head Ali: She's 15, I don't see how any of us can say or do anything to stop her if that's what she does want Tommy: 15 technically Tommy: 🤷 Ali: If we can't make her eat, you know Ali: what hope do we have for anything beyond that Tommy: 0 Tommy: & it's fucked Ali: Yep Ali: but it's not as if that bombshell has only just been dropped, I guess Ali: we'll carry on doing what we can Tommy: 🔮✨ Ali: ✌💚

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gretavanfleetlife · 5 years

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Only Time Will Tell:

Chapter 8

AN: Hey guys, it’s sooo good to be back!😊Sorry for such a long wait for this chapter, I was on vacation. Anyway y’all are gonna need to pace yourself with this one, it’s double the usual chapter length and so much is happening!!! Love you all, thank you so much for your support, enjoy!💛🌻

Warnings: swearing

Word count: 4,700 words (lol oops)

Officially, it's been exactly one month since your best friends left Frankenmuth. You steadily raise a thick black pen up to your calendar and mark an 'X' through today's date. Your eyes skim through the rest of the month, landing on a date with a large red circle around it. You stare at it for a moment before gazing back at today's date and lifting your finger to count the number of days between today and the circled date. 12. You count again, hoping you counted one more than you should have. Still 12.

You toss the pen onto your desk and turn to skim through your record collection. Your fingers land on Bob Dylan, and you give a loose smile at the esteemed man on the album cover, who smiles back. Placing the needle carefully onto the record, you then cross your bedroom and collapse into a comfy, blue beanbag chair. You close your eyes and listen to the record spin. You remain perfectly still throughout the entire record, humming along to the dreamlike tune. You only open your eyes when you hear the record stop, the needle lifting itself upwards and returning to its resting place. You let out a heavy sigh.

"God bless Bob Dylan, a true legend," you smile, repeating Josh's timeless saying. You miss him terribly. You begin to wonder if he's been thinking about you as much as you've been thinking about him.

You lean your head back and stare mindlessly out the window. You consider sending Sam a text but quickly decide against it. Since he's left, you've been texting Sam almost every day, earning a harsh wave of guilt every time that you did.

The only other person you wanted to talk to more than Sam was Josh, but that wasn't going very smoothly either. You've tried calling Josh multiple times throughout the month, but each time the phone would loudly ring until you were eventually sent to voicemail.

You shift uncomfortably on the beanbag chair beneath you, feeling complete boredom rain over you. You've been bored all month without them, you just didn't know what to do. Only two weeks to go, less than that even. You know you'll survive for 12 more days, but their arrival seems to be taking an eternity.

You decide to try and call Josh again, dialing his number effortlessly. You listen eagerly to the phone ring against your ear. With each ring, your hope of an answer increasingly fades. The last ring chimes brightly as the phone gives a final effort to reach Josh before you're sent to his voicemail. You listen to you and Josh recite his voicemail that you recorded together years ago. A faint smile tugs at your lips, hearing Josh's joyful voice as well as your own encouraging you to leave a message at the tone. You sink further back into the chair with a sigh. He probably just doesn't have his phone with him again, as usual. Josh never likes to carry his phone with him, you recall optimistically.

You decide to try calling again in a few days, tossing your phone lazily onto the bed across your room. You try to remember a time before now that you've gone this long without talking to Josh, but you can't seem to think of one.

You miss him terribly. You miss watching the adorable pair of dimples appear on his face when you make him smile, how his eyebrows furrow when he concentrates on something, and how he always looks after you and puts you before himself.

You close your eyes, hoping with your entire heart that he's not ignoring you on purpose as you drift slowly out of consciousness.

-Sam's POV-

It's been a month since the last time I saw y/n, the last time I talked to her in person, and the last time I touched her. I'm certain that I would have gone crazy by now if it hadn't have been for our consistent texting. The one thing that keeps me from wanting to give up on the tour entirely and go back home is the promise she made me. She said she's gonna wait for me, and as long as that's true I'm willing to wait a little longer. I've been waiting for her for years, and although it still hurts, another couple weeks won't kill me.

I raise the bottle to my lips and take another long sip of beer, gazing up at my brother seated across from me. I need to know what's going on with Josh. The way he speaks to me is different now, although I can barely even explain it. He doesn't look me in the eyes as much when he talks to me, and our conversations are often much shorter than normal. When we're not recording or performing, he makes up excuses to be away from me, and they're fairly easy to see through. I've brought it up to Jake, and he seems to know much more about what's going on with Josh than I do. It's possible that Josh may have told him all about whatever's got him in this mood, although I have a pretty strong gut feeling it's just their twin telepathy thing. Either way, Jake hasn't told me why Josh is acting so weird, he's only told me not to bother him about it.

The four of us sit in our new trailer in peaceful silence. Josh and Danny share one couch while Jake and I lounge on the one opposite them. Josh is seemingly very busy writing music, scribbling down lyrics while he concentrates on the notebook gripped tightly in his hands. Jake downs the last of his beer with one swift raise of his arm. He stands up rather unsteadily from his seat beside me and announces that he's going to bed. Danny seconds Jake's actions, saying a quick goodnight and following him to the bedroom in the back of the cramped trailer. Calling it a bedroom is a stretch by any means, though, since its really only four pullout couches divided from the rest of the trailer by a thin curtain. Danny slides the curtain closed behind him and soon you hear both boys flop heavily onto their beds.

I steal a glance at my brother. Josh doesn't seem to notice that he's alone with me, or if he does he doesn't care. His focus doesn't break as he thoughtfully pours lyrics onto the busy page, his eyebrows furrowed in deep concentration. I relax backward into the soft couch, quietly taking another long sip of my beverage.

Another ten minutes go by and there hasn't been a single word exchanged between Josh and I. Normally, this is a scenario I have only ever dreamed of, causing me to feel slightly uneasy in the somewhat tense silence. I decide to let him finish writing without interruption, not wanting to distract him from writing a potential masterpiece.

Gentle snoring cuts through the silence of the trailer, coming from behind the far curtain. I can tell with complete certainty that the noise is coming from both Danny and Jake.

Looking up at Josh, I watch as he gently closes his notebook and places it on the coffee table along with his dull pencil. He leans back and sinks into the couch, lifting a hand to his mouth and softly tracing his lips in a steady contemplation. Josh's phone suddenly begins to vibrate on the small wooden table in front of him. His face falls into a frown as he leans forward to read the name of who is calling him this late at night. I watch his face fall as he reaches out, grabbing the phone and staring at it. Josh hesitates for a moment, and then slowly taps the screen. The vibrating stops and he shoves the phone quickly into his pocket. He leans further back into the couch and crosses his arms.

"Who was that?" I ask quietly, breaking through his dazed thoughts as he raises his head in attention.

"Mm?” he grunts, keeping his arms crossed while his fingers continue to gently trace over his lips.

"Who was that calling you," I repeat. Josh shakes his head and looks downwards.

"Oh just y/n, I'll call her back later," he says unconvincingly. He begins to stand up but I cut him off.

"Josh, can I talk to you for a minute?" I ask hopefully. Josh slowly descends back into his seat.

"Uh, sure I guess. What about?" he shrugs. I place my beer bottle on the coffee table next to the tattered notebook and lean forward, resting my arms on my knees.

"Well, first I wanted to know why you've been ignoring all of y/n's calls," I wonder, noticing Josh's shoulders tense in anticipation, "It's been, what, a month now? Have you talked to her once since we left home?" Josh stares steadily into my eyes, seemingly hesitant on how to answer.

"N-no, I haven't," Josh stumbles, glancing at the floor. His eyebrows furrow as his gaze returns to meet mine, "but that's really not any of your business, Sam. I strongly advise you to leave this alone." I give a small laugh, unable to prevent it from escaping my lips.

"Oh, I'm pretty sure whatever's going on is my business too. Listen, Josh, I just want to help you get over whatever this is," I say, motioning to him, "that's all."

"Get over what?" he prods, crossing his arms and leaning back.

"Well for starters, you're ignoring your best friend, avoiding your brothers, including Danny, and for a month you haven't held a conversation with me that's lasted more than five minutes. Should I keep going? Or do you have an idea of what's going on now," I ask sarcastically, frustrated at how difficult Josh is being. He knows damn well how different he's been acting. God, Josh can be so fucking annoying sometimes.

"You have no fucking clue what you're talking about Sam," Josh spits, pointing at me angrily.

"Oh yeah? Enlighten me," I respond crossing my arms and trying my best to appear relaxed. Growing up with Josh has taught me exactly how to get under his skin just enough to make him confess anything.

"Alright fine Sam, if this is what you want, then here it is," he begins, his eyes narrowing and the muscles in his jaw clenching. My tactics seem to have worked, as I notice Josh speaking faster, concentrating less on what is actually coming out of his mouth. However, what I hear next disrupts my relaxed facade.

"Before we left, y/n told me all about how she feels towards you. Obviously, she's had a rough past dating experience so I didn't want her to get hurt again. Especially by some ignorant prick who's about to leave on tour for a month and a half," Josh says firmly, his voice raising the more he proceeds. I sit unable to move, shocked at the words that come flying out his mouth. "So I told her," Josh pauses dramatically. The way Josh edges me on makes me furious, but I manage to hold back my raging emotions.

"Told her what?" I ask, knowing it's what he wanted to hear, but feeling too eager to refrain from asking.

"I told her not go after you," he admits. I feel my face turn hot with anger, "in fact I asked her to promise me that she wouldn't go near y-"

"And what did she say?" I cut him off. His face visibly saddens.

"She agreed to the promise," he remembers quietly, as my heart sinks low into my chest. Everything makes so much more sense now, but Josh isn't finished. "And she broke that promise, but you already knew that," he says, shaking his head as I lower my gaze to the floor. Josh was talking much more quietly now, the former anger replaced by sadness as he recalled what had happened. "And that isn't even the worst part," he continues, seemingly lost in the memory to care whether he was telling me too much, "what hurt the most was when she told me nothing happened with you, again, and again, and again, right to my face. It hurt me. It really did," he stares across the room at me, "is that what you wanted to hear?" I swallow hard, not wanting to meet his gaze. He runs his hands across his face with a heavy sigh. Josh attempts to stand up but I cut him off again.

"Josh wait, hear me out," he pauses briefly before returning to his seat across from me. I meet his sad eyes with my own, "listen, you know me, better than most people. Do you really think that I would treat y/n like shit?" I ask, silently hoping that he'll say no. Josh opens his mouth to speak, but no words come out. He quietly shakes his head, and I know that I've gotten through to him.

"Look, I'm sorry that had to happen. You can hate us both for being together, or try and break us apart," I continue, "but I love her, and that's all I'm really concerned about."

-Time skip: 12 days later-

-Y/N's POV-

You wake up with a start, excitedly checking your phone for the time and reading 10:53 a.m. glare brightly back. You went to bed extremely late last night, unable to fall asleep due to the anticipation of your friends coming home the next day. You throw your comforter off of you and swing your legs around to sit up on the side of your bed. You stretch happily and let out a loud yawn. You decide to make a trip to the record store to buy some 'welcome home' presents for the boys. You change quickly and hurry outside toward the black pickup truck parked in your driveway. You hop in the vehicle and back out of the driveway, turning on the radio to your favorite rock and roll station. You hear the ending of 'Sympathy for the Devil' fill the silence of your car. Once the song finishes, the upbeat voice of the radio announcer fills the car.

"Alright, Frankenmuth, up next is a new song by a local and upcoming rock and roll band, Greta Van Fleet!" You gasp loudly as a familiar guitar riff fills the air. You crank up the volume as loud as the speakers will allow, singing along loudly to 'Highway Tune' as you speed down the gravel road and enter the town. A huge smile graces your face as you pull into the driveway of Siren Records. You park the car but remain seated until the song finishes, giving an excited squeal as the song fades to silence and the radio announcer returns.

You happily hop out of your car and enter the record store with a new skip in your step. Your mind feels extremely crowded with everything that's going on, but you still know exactly what you want to get for each of the boys. You're as familiar with their individual music tastes as you are with the back of your hand. Searching through the endless bins of records, you find your gift for Josh with ease, proudly picking up Nashville Skyline by Bob Dylan and tucking it under your armpit. As you continue to skim through the dusty records, you feel a vibration in your pocket. You reach for your phone and see who's calling you.

"Oh my god," you mumble, your eyes wide with anticipation. You fumble with your phone, almost dropping it as you accept the call and raise it quickly to your ear, "hello?"

"Hey y/n, it's me," Josh answers, his voice sounding deep and raspy through the phone. You've missed the sound of his voice the most, his greeting bringing a genuine smile to your face.

"Hey, Josh-" you begin before abruptly cutting yourself off. By habit, you almost called him 'Joshie', which you know would not have gone well judging by the last conversation the two of you had. He clears his throat into the phone, pausing for a moment. You grip the phone tightly as you hear muffled mumbling in the background.

"So I just wanted to ask how it's going, uh, back home," he wonders aloud.

Placing down your record momentarily, you make your way outside of the record store so as not to bother anyone inside with your private conversation.

"Well, it was incredibly boring without you," you smile, "Frankenmuth has never been so quiet." Josh laughs into the phone, and you feel your heart begin to beat faster. The sound is like music to your ears, you've missed making him laugh. You picture familiar dimples gracing his cheeks as his mouth tugs into a wide grin.

"That sounds dreadful," he chuckles.

"It was," you agree, "so when do you think you'll be home?"

"Around another half hour or so, I'd say," he estimates, making your heart flutter at the thought of their arrival.

"Oh that's fantastic, see you then!" you smile, feeling exhilarated and over the moon with joy, "bye Joshie!" You clap a hand over your mouth as you realize what you just called him. You close your eyes, bracing yourself for his response.

"Bye y/n, see you soon," he laughs before hanging up. You let out a huge sigh of relief as you shove your phone back into your pocket, thankful that he didn't scold you for using his nickname again.

A hand taps you on the shoulder, breaking you out of your daze as you turn around to see who it is. Your eyes gaze upward to meet Ethan's, as you force a smile onto your face. You were hoping to avoid him until school started up again, not wanting to interact with him after watching him make out with another girl at Josh's party.

"Hey! It's good to see you," you lie. Being friendly seems to be the quickest way through this conversation.

"Yeah, you look great," he says, visibly checking you out as you cross your arms in front of yourself in a weak attempt to stop his wandering eyes.

"Thanks," you say, a smile tugging at the corners of your mouth. You go on to talk about what you both have been doing this summer for a while longer, as you patiently wait for your conversation to end.

"So, uh," Ethan proceeds warily, "did you happen to get my text? I sent it to you a while ago, like, a couple of days after Josh's party or something like that." You frown and shake your head.

"No, I must not have seen it. Sorry about that, I'm just never really on my phone that much," you reply apologetically. That was a total lie as well, as you had definitely noticed that you had received a few texts from him a while back, but decided not to answer.

"No worries, I just wanted to tell you that I think you're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen," Ethan continues, taking a step towards you. He's standing so close to you now that you can almost feel his breath. You look down at your feet to refrain from rolling your eyes at his comment. You feel his hand lightly lift your chin up, forcing you to meet his gaze. He quickly closes the gap between you and leans in to kiss you. Before his lips can meet yours, you swiftly take a step away from him, stumbling backward. You weren't about to break another promise, the last one was bad enough. You look up at him with a look of insincere apology.

"I-I'm in a relationship," you hear yourself say. It seems like the easiest way out of the situation. His eyebrows furrow as he glares at you with confusion.

"Oh," Ethan sighs, "with who?" Your eyes widen and your heart begins to beat faster.

"Sam Kiszka," you blurt, feeling a familiar blush creep onto your cheeks as you realize what you just said out loud. You watch Ethan roll his eyes.

"Come on, really?" You frown and furrow your eyebrows as he shakes his head, "I'm way better looking than that guy." A sharp laugh escapes your lips as you smile up at him.

"Yeah right, have you seen Sam?" you say as Ethan's face falls, "you wish you even came close," you scoff, turning on your heel and walking back towards the record store. You swing open the door with a smirk plastered onto your face, finding where you left your Bob Dylan record and resuming your search.

After a few more minutes of skimming through the dusty bins, you settle on The Beatles' Revolver for Danny, Hot Rocks by the Rolling Stones for Jake, and none other than Van Morrison's Moondance for Sam.

After you pay, you hop back into your truck and check the time. The boys should arrive home any minute now, so you begin to drive back towards the Kiszka house. You want to see them as soon as you can, so you don't waste any time as you quickly speed down the dusty dirt road.

Pulling into their driveway, you park your car and wait for their van to drive in beside you.

Another ten minutes pass, feeling like an eternity before you see their van roll up to the house and park beside you. You jump out of your truck and run over to theirs just as Josh steps out of the passenger seat. In the moment, you forget all about your fight, immersed only in feeling ecstatic that Josh is home. You rush towards him and throw your arms around his neck. He doesn't hesitate to hug you tightly against himself in return.

"I missed you so fucking much," you say into his shirt as he grasps you tighter.

"I missed you too," he replies, pulling back while keeping his hands on your shoulders, "but don't think I'm not still pissed," he says with a smirk.

"I know, talk later, okay?" you ask hopefully. Josh smiles and nods.

"Okay," he agrees.

"What are we, chopped liver?" Jake says, causing you to tear your eyes away from Josh and walk towards him with your arms outstretched. He wraps his arms around you and pulls you in for a hug, rubbing your back gently.

"You didn't forget about me, did you?" he whispers in your ear, hugging you close to him.

"Of course not, are you kidding?" you grin. Suddenly, your hug is disrupted by Danny pushing Jake away from you.

"What the fuck," Jake chuckles, as Danny wraps his muscular arms around you tightly, forcing you into a soft hug.

"Shut up, it's my turn," he answers loudly as you laugh against his chest.

"It's good to see you, y/n," Danny beams as you hug him tighter in response.

He lets go of you and you turn towards Sam. Your heart flutters as you stare at him, admiring his seemingly flawless features. He looks even better than you remember as he closes the distance between you.

"Hey," he says awkwardly as you wrap your arms around his torso. He hugs you back, enveloping his arms around you and nuzzling his face into your neck. You close your eyes and smile into his chest in a state of total serenity.

"I missed this," he mutters quietly into your neck, too muffled for anyone but you to hear it, "I missed you." You feel butterflies swarm in your stomach and your heart skip a beat.

"I missed you too," letting out a content sigh and pulling out of the hug. You gaze at each other for a moment, both of you admiring the other. You hear Jake clear his throat, causing you to tear your eyes away from Sam and look towards the abrupt noise. The three boys were standing a few feet away, smiling at you and Sam. You blush, trying to think of a way to divert their focus from you two.

"Oh, I almost forgot, I have presents!" you say enthusiastically, heading to your car to hide your rosy cheeks. The boys exchange low murmurs of excitement in anticipation of receiving their gifts. You grab the records from your car and skip back to the group. You hand them out and smile as you watch each of their faces light up.

"No way!" Danny says as you hand him his. "Alright I've gotta hear this," he says as he gives you a quick hug and rushes inside to find a record player.

"Me too," Jake and Sam say in unison, hurrying to catch up with Danny.

"Thanks, y/n!" Sam calls while he runs into the house with Jake. You laugh at their reactions as you realize you're left alone Josh. You glance over at him, watching him study the album cover of his new record.

"You like it?" you ask as he quickly looks up at you with a wide grin, soft dimples appearing on his cheeks.

"You know I love it, thank you y/n," he says, but his smile soon fades, "can we go somewhere to talk?" You nervously scratch the back of your head.

"Of course," you reply. You follow him as he leads you to the backyard, each of you taking a seat on the porch steps overlooking the forest beyond their property. At first, neither of you speak, both of you gazing thoughtfully at each other not seeming to know where to begin. You both decide to break the silence and begin to speak at the same time. You apologize and Josh gives a small laugh.

“You can go first,” he speaks gently. You suck in a sharp breath and begin to explain yourself to him, apologizing every now and then. You tell him that although you may not deserve his trust, you are going to be nothing but honest with him from now on. Fiddling with your hands, you go on to say that you still like Sam, but you’re unsure what that would mean for everyone else.

You speak for a long time, words that you longed to say while Josh was gone pouring out of you without restraint. Josh stares attentively at you the whole time, listening to everything you have to say without interrupting. You finish speaking with a sigh and look up at him nervously. He smirks at you.

“Are you done?” he asks gently. You nod, swallowing sharply as he raises a hand to his face, tracing over his lips with his fingers softly. He gives a small sigh and looks to the ground, seemingly deciding where to begin.

“While we were gone, I talked to Sam,” he says steadily. Your heartbeat quickens and you anxiously bite your lip. “I gave it a lot of thought, and I realized that I haven’t been completely fair. I didn’t realize how much you mean to him,” he continues, your heart fluttering in your chest, “and come to think of it, if I loved someone as much as Sam loves you, I might have done the same thing.” He pauses, looking up at you with a small smile.

“And although I don’t think I’ll ever understand how you can find that freak appealing,” he says, causing both of you to laugh, “I do know that he’ll treat you right,” he smiles. You stand and move towards him, reaching down to him and hugging him tightly.

“I love you so much, thank you, Josh,” you grin, your eyes shut tightly as he accepts your embrace. He stands with you as you pull away, turning to walk with him back to the house.

“As long as you’re happy,” he grins at you, throwing his arm loosely over your shoulder. “But if you ever lie to me again-" he laughs, wagging a finger at you as you cut him off.

“I promise I won’t, under one condition,” you smirk, causing him to stop walking and look down at you with confusion.

“And what’s that?” he asks.

“I get to call you Joshie,” you say as he laughs loudly, mimicking your wide smile.

“Deal.”

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