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docholligay · 1 year

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Re: The bouncing the leg post

So this one’s on me, completely, but the point of the post wasn’t “Tell me what it means when you bounce your leg” though, you can be totally forgiven for that as I really did delve into that in a very ‘enough about me, let’s talk about me’ way. Fair enough, absolutely.

What I MEANT to be saying, was about a larger, broader thing. Where we talk SO much about various mental illnesses and neuroatypicalities that I think we sometimes lose sight of the fact that people are individuals and individual things MEAN different things for different people. Our broad strokes ways of talking about ‘ADHD be like’ or ‘tapping my leg at 180 kph to try and drill through the floor to escape’ isn’t like #problematic--life is rarely that simple--but I think we can get caught up in these types of shorthand that are less useful than we think.

So, for example, someone, reading a post about tapping one’s leg because they are anxious, sees ME tapping MY leg, and, in an effort to be kind, asks me if I want to go, or makes a suggestion to leave. For what a bouncing leg means to ME, I am embarrassed, or worse, hurt, because it didn’t signify anxiety at all, it signified, as a commenter said and I wholeheartedly agree with “a wagging tail’

I see this kind of a thing repeated a lot, online. I think it comes out of a place where we desire both to understand and be understood, and we really want the box. We want things to be easy.

And so we end up very unintentionally being unhelpful to each other, or hurting each other, because someone knows me to have ADHD and has seen posts about needing constant music or tv or whatever, meanwhile I am deeply desiring the sweet release of death because fucking House Hunters is on the background and I cannot block out this woman’s concerns about entertaining in her kitchen. And vice versa, someone reads my post about just needing fucking quiet at least a few hours a day and applies that to someone else.

I come from a, oh let’s call it a rural tradition. When I lived in a small town, and I mean small town by Montana reckoning, people knew me as Doc. They had no idea I had ADHD, but they did know that they needed to make sure I was looking at them if they wanted to make sure I heard something. They did know that I didn’t like the Tv to be on unless I was very intentionally watching it. They did know I could be weird about fleece and very much liked wool even when it was scratchy. All of this was unbundled from a diagnosis, and particular to me. We won’t go into how I do not like how my personality is being drilled down into a series of medical and cultural boxes, but I will say it is nice to be taken as yourself.

And I think, online, it would be good for us to try and capture some of that energy. It’s not as easy, but I do think it is somewhat possible. For example, the diagnostic criteria for many things has drifted. This is not me saying this is a bad or good thing. i do not actually care, my label is not that special. But the consequence of it, is there are some people with ADHD that I do not actually share a group of experiences with. It is not a USEFUL way for me to identify people who might be able to understand or help me. It is FAR more useful for me to say something like, “People who struggle with background noise, how do you manage at restaurants where they have a TV?” because the DIAGNOSIS is unimportant. I’ve met people with ADHD who turn on the TV the second they get home. These are not people that are going to be able to help me. People with the same EXPERIENCE of background noise or fleece or whatever the fuck ever are going to be helpful to me.

Likewise, if I am trying to help a friend, who I love, it is far far far more valuable to me to learn the ways THEY operate, versus any shorthand whereby I could pick up shit from the internet. I am not going to out any of my friends who may or may not feel comfortable with their medical history on display, but I tell you, knowing that Sarah is like x and Daniel is like y is far more useful to me than “Sarah has y and Daniel has x” That might be useful to a practitioner...but I’m not one, and I’m not going to pretend to be one and evaluate all of their behavior through that lens. I am going to evaluate them as Sarah, and Daniel.

Do we see what I’m saying here? I made this unrebloggable because I think it would be easy to take what I’m saying in bad faith, and theoretically enough of y’all know me (like! as a person!) to take it in the spirit in which it’s intended.

I think it is tempting to find ways to shortcut communicating needs and wants and even pain to each other. I get it, I am there. I think it comes out of a place of kindness, and longing to be known.

The bummer of the deal is it ends up not working a lot of the time, and then people end up piling on these microlabels and diagnoses, listing them out like a full house in a poker table, in an effort to be understood. Which I think is all we really want, as human beings. People take something someone else says about ADHD, and applies it to me, and I feel pigeonholed and hurt. People take something I say about ADHD, and applies it to them, and they feel misunderstood and even unwanted.

And this isn’t just about ADHD, that just happens to be a quick at-hand and I prefer to pick on myself. But it applies to the experience of being gay, trans, autistic, rural, southern, whatever. There are perhaps commonalities--this is not me saying ‘so social grouping is DEAD’--but, I once heard someone say, “If you’ve met one autistic person, you’ve met one autistic person’ and I like that, I would apply it even further.

If you’ve met a person, you’ve met a person. If you want to know them, you have to know them.

I said in the tags of my last post--which I think was actually closer to what I was getting at--that I am very fortunate because my friends understand me as who I am. I am loved on this merit. Or hated ahaha, I mean, also fair. They understand that I find it very difficult to sit still when I am excited and happy. They understand that I am a chatterbox when I’m happy. They understand that I am absolutely, rock solid sure, that I am completely correct about something, and it is completely possible that I will be exactly just as sure tomorrow only believing the opposite side ahaha. That I am impulsive, in ways that are annoying and delightful. That I have a lot of trouble in an open, loud room, and that I prefer to sit with my back against a wall. That I am a brilliant, tenacious ‘rent a terrier’ about things, and unfortunately that tenacity will come around to you on a long enough timeline and I’ll bully you into fixing some detail of your life. That I am excellent in a crisis, not so great in the ‘remembering a basic everyday thing’. That I will remember something I meant to do months ago and all of a sudden there’s a gift on your door. I am curious to a fault, and I will drag you out of your house to do things with a smile on my face. I’m Doc.

And, I think, for most of my friends, all that is uncoupled from anything else. Where would I even begin to pick apart which parts of those actually belong to me?

Here’s the thing you’re not gonna like: Many of them know this because I have told them this. I have had to say “I’m having a hard time with this.” I’ve had to tell them my feelings were hurt by a ridiculously innocuous and gentle rejection because I hold them in high esteem. Embarrassing! Horrible! I have relived so many painful schoolyard moments blushing as someone asks me if I can stop bouncing my leg. But that’s not now, and I have found largely, people want to understand.

Also, if my needs as a PERSON hit up against someone else’s, that is okay. There are people I cannot really hang out with in real life, because what they need and want is so far afield from me. And that is okay.

This is a part of being human. This is being in community with each other. This sucks and is very hard, but it is the only way to really interact with each other. If we want to make our online communities give us more of the socio-emotional benefits of in-person community--and yell at me all you want, most psychoiogists would agree they don’t--we’re going to have to know each other. We’re going to have to set aside this grouping of assumptions based on shorthand about people we interact with, and also, let yourself free of that shorthand. If you have trouble wearing fleece, does it really matter why? Or does it matter that when you visit a friend, they take the fleece blanket off the couch?

I don’t know. I feel like I’m talking in circles here. But I have seen, over the years, such a developing desire to understand each other not as wholly realized individuals but through a series of, to put it extremely dramatically, archetypes. To understand ourselves that way, to think that only those talismans make our experiences real. And that isn’t fair to you, or anyone else.

Also I would super appreciate it if people would stop armchair diagnosing me and other people with shit.

#There was an attempt at coherency ahahah #hopefully at least one person gets what I'm laying down #I am annoying and delightful due to a veritable tapestry of factors #and I want to be seen for the tapestry not the individual threads #NOTICE MY GOLD-THREADED ELEPHANT #I SOMETIMES can guess what will piss people off about whatever I say #but not always #this one...might?

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chenziee · 7 months

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Tagged by @cosmicatta! Thank youuu (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

RULES: Post the last sentence you wrote (fanfic / original / anything) and tag as many people as there are words in the sentence.

Law was almost scared to open his eyes anymore.

First sentence (yes I only have one (1) sentence so far written at 23:45 last night) from a part of a project from @truffyfest, I guess take this as a teaser for it?? xD

I'm not tagging anyone because everyone's already been tagged xD So if you see this and haven't been tagged, consider yourself tagged now <3

#i may only have one sentence but i will make it if it kills me okay #I've been having so much fun with okay #i may or may not have gone a bit overboard #in my defence i only do short oneshots so it's all short okay?? ahahah #look forward to the end of the week i guess 👀👀#honestly glad i only noticed irene's tag now because the previous sentence i wrote would spoil literally everything about another story 😂#anyway #tagged #katie pretends to fic #cosmicatta

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aragarna · 1 year

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Zorro in Disney's Zorro (1x07, 1957).

#zorro #disney's zorro #I believe that's actually #buddy van horn #stunt double for #guy williams #it's hard to tell with the mask ahahah #anyone saying it's ridiculous that no one recognizes zorro clearly has never watched the show #half the time it's the stunt double and no one notices it #my gifs #ze rewatch #zorro rewatch

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doodle-doodie-doo · 2 years

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I decided to do the Cartoon Network color palette trend but with my girls! I tried to go for something abstract...

#my art #digital art #mlp #mlp fanart #mlp twilight #mlp rarity #mlp rainbowdash #mlp applejack #mlp pinkiepie #mlp fluttershy #cartoon network color palette #notice how ajs in the background ahahah im very funny laugh #when applejack is the only happy one u know u done fucked up

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catboyfurina · 1 year

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#beeep #i know it is the sleepiness and I'm going to bed but #BIGGEST SIGH I WANT TO BE SPECIAL.#ive Accepted my role as generally pleasant but kind of boring but. sighs. idk :( im #just like. Here. yknow. thats what leo has to offer. Is There.#okay sleeping not enough hours and then baizhu is going to fix me. i can be #not just accepted of but also okay with being background character coded once i have Baizhu about it #also very related but im hoping my doctor is gonna let me have the antidepressants again soon #and also I'm pretty sure i make everyone uncomfortable and irritated if im around but that one isnt logic thats just feelings so im trying #to ignore it. but. hrggrh.#sar//azanma//i voice i want to connect but i am so scared of everything forever and also like. bad at it #u may notice that the feelings are incongruent with the first bit well that is because! the first bit is me being sad about reality #and not me inventing things that scare me to be sad about #unless the inventions are real but . i cant tell. ahahah #goodnight im going to be normal at ummmm some point :D

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brannewjoint · 1 year

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Not me just now realizing I've been switching between the two spellings of Jaime and Jamie....😭 😭🫢 do I not know how to spell my own sims name ???

#personal post #likeee BFFR #now i have to fix it and hope no one noticed ahahahah #in the game its spelt Jamie so that's the right way I guess ahahah

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writer-motivator · 4 months

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huh…. very surprisingly I worked on drunk!aos wip???? IM IN SHOCK AND PLEASANTLY SURPRISED! okay so. was thinking about aos again and aos2 and like u know after u know. Watching edits and stuff and was thinking about fics again and just…. went to check u know the wips. And it was there. Opened it. Was reading it. Thinking about how I DO like it but feel very blergh about a lot of things that I wrote about it??? Yeah and then u know the lil edits I could do but was just ignoring cuz idk. I didn’t feel like making *one* change was worth it. It would be annoying having to like. Go to the spreedsheet n log that in when… it wasn’t really anything. Then stopped and was like. Wanted to challenge that mentality I had and was like. Who cares u know and worked on it.

And…. Continued to work on it?

I was like stuck on the scene that’s supposed to transition to like. Him laying there. And like. All I had in my mind was her pov. After that. BUT THIS FIC IS MEANBT TO BE WRITTEN IN HIS POV so I’ve been ignoring that but went. Why don’t I just? Do it? Who cares if it’s supposed to be in his pov in the end. Does it MATTER if I write her pov now?????? I can always like. Freakin change it. Right now, I feel like writing her pov and it would help.

So.

I did it. Personally, wasn’t feeling like it was the right thing. Right thing is not the word for it. More like….. it’s not like something I’d want for final version, I would rather edit that. And likely cut out all of it. But I kept… writing. It doesn’t really matter if it’s like that, right? Like. It’s really just *getting it all out* like it’s not like the lines itself are even bad. It’s just feels like u know. Mmmh. Hard to describe but LETS TRY

okay so u got the scene “R kisses T” and the first thing that just comes into mind:

R leans into to kiss T. He’s nervous. He doesn’t know what he’s doing, really. His hands are clammy. Flickering his eyes up into T’s eyes, he finds they’re closed. Oh. Suddenly, it feels. Like. It’s all on him. The responsibility isn’t good at all.

ANYWAYS. so like. you see, I wrote this right now and while writing. I literally. Just kept writing abt whatever came to mind. I did not like it. More like it “felt wrong” cuz I was just going on and the scene felt so. BLERGH! wrong!

like the way it immediately goes to “he’s nervous” and went on continuedly about his thoughts. Just. Eh. No. That cut down the whole tension of the scene. I wanted to only focus on the movements! You know! But is it bad that I wrote all of those thoughts? Nope! It like gives me *more* details about the scene and while I even want to cut it out later, it’s okay. Since it can give me help about what to write about the scene and even how to continue it.

like there was a lot of this in what I just wrote. Not the thoughts thing only, as there where lines too that weren’t thought but more description that I feel very wrong to have there but JUST WROYE IT. Cuz! Nothing is gonna happen if it does right????? And I’d have a lot of material to work with later! But it does feel very, very odd. And wrong. But I guess I just gotta work with that. Anyways. Yeahhhh.

#january 2024 #5th jan #also huh. noticed this drunk!aos wip and the ep4/5 kiss wip #really do all go together #and got some urge to even write EARLIER into the ep ahahah #at the banquet lol as I was writing her pov #itd be so good #while I don’t feel the urge yet to put the kiss wip and the drunk wip *together*#into one whole thing now. it’s really cool to try and connect them heh

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periwinkla · 6 days

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All the pokeattorney AU pieces compiled in one place. Eh, didn't realize I drew so much of it. Side note: yes, that's a Yamper. Good eye on those who noticed! ahahah

#ace attorney #narumitsu #miles edgeworth #phoenix wright #wrightworth #pokeattorney au #maya fey #trucy wright #my art #periwinkla #fanart #pokemon

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xiao-come-home · 25 days

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Thinking about how one of Boothill’s skills being called sizzlin tango…okay. okay . yeah . what if I want to dance with him . what if he has some smooth moves, what if he wants to catch you off guard by dipping you down while his free hand runs up your thigh okay what sure totally normal ahahah

ANON YOU HAVE AWOKEN THE BEAST WITHIN ME

Yes yes!! Boothill would LOVE to dance with you and absolutely steal the show!! You can't dance? it's absolutely fine, he'll lead you and you only need to follow him. God he FOR SURE has smooth moves, even if you don't have much experience, it's barely noticeable.

Boothill definitely loves dancing, mostly because of the closeness - he wants to have his hand on you at all times. He wants to touch you, and will touch you. Dancing gives him an opportunity to do just that - hands, waist, chest to chest, it doesn't even matter what dance it is, he's already dragging you onto the middle of the room and asks you for a dance.

The closeness can make him feel dizzy, it feels like he's about to go crazy when he has you almost face to face, the familiar scent of your skin reaching his nose, Boothill bites his lip to prevent just absolutely ditching the entire idea and kissing you right here.

Don't even mention Boothill touching your thigh when he dips you down, good lord save us all, he knows what he's doing. He grins at you when he feels the smooth skin when he glides his hand up your thigh, teasing the fabric of your underwear with his fingers.

He also likes to twirl you. No reason for this, he just thinks it's cute - perhaps when you greet or just because he felt it. When you face him again, he presses a sweet kiss on your cheek, intertwining and squeezing your hands together.

#im gonna go feral im afraid #i know nothing about dancing but god ID DANCE WITH HIM #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail #hsr x reader #boothill hsr #boothill x reader #boothill #.thirst

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itz-amani · 3 months

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OMG IMAGINES PLEASE OF INTERACTIONS WITH HIGH SCHOOL NANAMI!

For the first time in my life finally! OMGGG THIS ONE HE IS SO EMO AHAHAH I will try my best :)

Thanks for your request!

''I'ts not that I don't like you!''

(Highschool Nanami x reader Imagines) pictures are'nt mine and sorry grammar error

a/n: fluff , a bit of suggestive

Highschool! Nanami the first time he met you, He hates how nice you are . To him , you are like ''happy go lucky or goody two shoes''. You are just like the combination of Haibara and Satoru . The way you greet him every time in the morning felt like a blessing but he is just in denial...

''Good morning Nanami -san !'' You smiled with cheerful smile

He looked away and just nodded , covering his mouth murmuring ''That smile of hers.. Gosh such a sweet girl.. ''

Even Haibara notice his best friend has a big fat ass crush on you. when he asked Nanami about his crush on you Nanami nearly cried. Its literally obvious how Nanami acts when you are around him.

''So you have a crush on her Nanami?~'' Haibara teased

''Please don't spill a word especially to that white hair creep..'' Nanami face reddened than Itadori's shoes.

Highschool! Nanami Who buys you your favorite snack at the vending machine because he knows food is your therapy and he knows how tired you are fighting curses why not treat his crush?

Highschool! Nanami Who got caught red handed by Gojo having a crush on you by having your photo smiling with a peace sign as his phone wallpaper. Gojo teases him like a lot and Geto thinks its cute.

Highschool! Nanami Who confessed to you with the help of Haibara ,Gojo and Geto because this man can't do without them.

''Sooo how are you gonna tell her Nanami? Haibara asked

''Seduce her in bed that will wor-OW SUGURU '' Gojo suggested but ended yelled in pain by Geto smacked his head

''That is not the answer Satoru..'' Geto facepalmed

Nanami ended up confessed to you by reciting a poetry about you ( what a sweet guy huh?)

Highschool! Nanami who has you laying on his lap while waiting for Haibara to finish his mission. You playing his fingers , ranting about life . the man always listen to you.

Highschool! Nanami Who listens to your crappy jokes even tho he thinks its annoying . The type that combs your hair , buys you your favorite color hairpins . He thinks its hot you wearing it.

Highschool! Nanami who gets jealous easily when Gojo talks with you. Gojo just wanted to tease Nanami how protective he is towards you . He once pissed off by Gojo lifting your chin he immediately pulls you away from Gojo , brings you to an empty corridor and having a make out session with you.

Highschool! Nanami and You got voted to be the cutest couple in the school

Highschool! Nanami who starts to saves money for you and him to live in Malaysia together when you guys are adults.

Highschool! Nanami who always have time to tutor you if you don't understand what subject you are hard to catchup especially mathematics. Study dates are always at a cafe or after school.

Highschool! Nanami who adores the couple bracelet you made for him like this photo https://i.pinimg.com/736x/17/6f/04/176f043438f365ffdbd83673308af0df.jpg

Highschool! Nanami who has his own playlist about you . sometimes you guys swap playlist . Shares his earphones with you listening to songs he thinks about you like

Die For You (The weeknd & Arianna Grande)

My love mine all mine (Mitski)

See you Again (Tyler the creator , Kali uchis )

Highschool! Nanami who makes sure you already tied you shoes , Your clumsiness he is just so protective

Highschool! Nanami who lays his head on your shoulder , his hand on your pinky on a train ride . He doesn't like to show his affections in public he prefers PDA when him and you alone.

Highschool! Nanami who invites Haibara to join your guys date such as hangin around in a cafe . The man himself is proud to Nanami's wingman. You and Haibara get along pretty well. He will and never invite Gojo.

Highschool! Nanami who always calls or facetime with you before going to bed .He can't sleep without seeing your face. He needs to make sure that you are in your room , reminding you to sleep early.

''Get some sleep love..''

''Okay if you insist Ken - Ken '' the nickname you gave him he couldn't help blushed a bit

Thank you for your request!

#jjk x reader #jjk comfort #jujutsu kaisen #kento nanami #nanami x reader #nanami x y/n #jjk x y/n #jjk x you #nanami kento #jjk nanami #jujutsu nanami #itz.amani writes

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ilovechuuyasm · 3 months

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My random thoughts on how good ler Alastor would be were well received, so I wrote a fanfic based on that

This is a tickle fanfiction, If this is not your area of interest, don't read it! ^^

Ler!Alastor and Lee!Reader - He just wanted to make you smile

You were just having a bad day, everyone and everything was irritating you since the morning. Plus, Alastor went to a meeting of the rulers, so you were sitting in your room, reading (you don't have TV, I wonder why) and waiting for him to come back and improve your mood.

He appeared out of nowhere and hugged you, scaring you a little "Waah, one day you'll scare me to death!" you squeaked, he sat down next to you, slightly amused.

"Well, hello there, darling!" he greeted you, ignoring your earlier comment "Did something happen?" he tilted his head slightly, looking at your face.

"Nothing special... just a bad day" you murmured and you spread your hands, wanting some affection from him.

"Hm? You want a hug now?" He asked, watching you.

"Yes, please, I've been waiting for you all day" you whispered. Instead of doing it normally, Alastor teleported closer to you and hugged you gently.

"Now smile, sweetheart! You know you are not fully dressed without a smile!" he said enthusiastically. You sighed and smiled fakely for a moment, then returned to your dissatisfied face. "Oh, that's not nice.. " he said, he sounded disappointed, but at the same time you could hear a little teasing in his voice "I don't want my beloved one to look so sad" he added, placing his hand on your side and moving you closer to his embrace, smiling widely. You had a feeling that he was planning something and after a while your hunches were confirmed as you felt a small poke on your side.

"Nahh! Alastor!" you squeaked, trying to escape his embrace, but instead you felt Alastor's shadow (Idk, that black thing lmao) wrap around your body.

"Ohh, you are not going anywhere now, little fawn~" he said, wiggling his fingers in a distinctive way, knowing how it affects you "If you don't want to smile for me, I'll make you~" He announced and you noticed a sadistic gleam in his eyes. He knew you had a thing for tickling, you were the only person he didn't want to actually hurt, but a little torture never hurt anyone, right?

You giggled nervously, when you felt like your body was completely immobilized and you were at the mercy of the radio demon. "Al, I can smile for you now, you know?" you said, grinning at him, trying to defend yourself.

"Hmm" he looked at you, tilting his head, pretending to be thinking "Too lateee~" he hums and you felt his fingers attacking your exposed sides. He didn't even try to start gently or to tease you, he immediately started tickling you hard, and you immediately burst out laughing.

You started squirming as much as you could, which only encouraged him to continue. It's an amazing feeling when the victim wants to escape but is unable and has to endure everything Alastor wants to do to them, he loved it. His hands roamed over your body, looking for the most sensitive places so he could torture you a bit, while you laughed, struggling to take each breath as this demon wouldn't give you even a moment's rest.

"A-! Ahahah! Alahaha-!" you tried to say his name.

He leaned over you, continuing to tickle your stomach now "Enjoying yourself?" He whispered in his teasy tone.

"NOHOHO!" you squealed.

"Oh what a shame!" He answered "Because I'm not finished with you yet~" he made eye contact with you and started tickling your ribs more aggressively. Tears started to well up in your eyes from laughing, and the laughter became more and more hysterical. His smile widened "Could you scream a little bit louder for me~?"

You began to squirm and whimper as the sensation took over your entire body, you felt so vulnerable.

"ALASTORR! NYAHAHAHYAH!" you screamed, you felt Alastor dig his fingers into your knees and then your thighs. You wanted to kick your legs, but they were immobilized, so all you could do was continue laughing hysterically. He enjoyed your screams, they were a sign to him that he was taking good care of you "FUHUHUCK!" the curse left your mouth.

"Oh my, what a mess of words!" said Alastor "You shouldn't say that, you little fawn~" he hums, grabbing your ankle, you gained a second of respite.

"LEHEHEAVE ME ALOHOHONE!" you squealed when his finger ran over your foot.

"Didn't you tell me earlier that you've been waiting for me all day?" he asked, tickling your poor sole with two fingers now. You groaned in response and soon started laughing again. He knew you wouldn't answer him now, so he spoke again "Ohh, you are so adorable, how entertaining!" he started tickling you mercilessly again, quickly running his fingers along the entire length of your sole.

"AHAHALA-!" you cried "ALASTOOOR!"

"Aww, i could just eat you up!" he exclaimed, which sounded truly disturbing coming from him, he let go of your ankle and looked at you as you caught your breath "But I won't, because i still want you here with me HaHa!" Alastor said such weird things sometimes, and honestly that was one of the things you loved about him "Speaking of eating you~" He hiked up your shirt, which was unexpected, and leaned down, glaring at you. You let out a long, very high-pitched moan when he blew raspberry on your stomach. If that wasn't enough, his fluffy, long ears nuzzled your chin. You started giggling uncontrollably again. Very gently, he began to nibble the skin on your belly and sides, even though his teeth are quite sharp, he somehow managed to make it tickle mercilessly.

After a while, his hands were on your sides again and he tickled you so bad. Your screams and laughter filled the entire room, because it was so intense.

"NOHOHOH! STAHAHAP!" you yelped. You couldn't see what affected you more, his merciless fingers, the sweet raspberries amd nibbles on your belly or those ears! You felt so overwhelmed, and Alastor seemed happy with what he was doing.

When he finally took pity on your fate, stopped tickling you, he removed the shadow surrounding you and looked at you with a huge, satisfied smile. You took a deep breath and closed your eyes in exhaustion.

"I hate you.." you murmured.

"HaHa! I surely doubt it!" he answered and stroked your hair "You should appreciate how merciful I was anyway Hah!" his smile widened again.

"You are so creepy sometimes" you smirked slightly "But i guess, that's why i love you"

"I hope I managed to make you feel better" he said "Do you need anything, fawn?"

"Uhh, just water, but I can go get it myself"

"Then we can go together" Alastor decided, offering you his hand. You smiled at how quickly he could go from being cruel to being so sweet and you grabbed his hand.

You didn't expect that everyone would notice your red face and disheveled hair, but they did. Charlie was terrified that he had done something bad to you, but Angel Dust didn't forget to mention that from the screams he could tell that you two had a lot of fun. You didn't know if it would be more embarrassing to admit that Alastor was just tickling you or to let them think you were f*cking..

#tickle content #tword #tickle #tickle community #tickling #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel tickle #alastor tickle #ler!alastor #lee!reader #tickle fic

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sydneyyuu · 22 days

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Hiiii. Can you do one where the usually calm and composed Captain Levi turns into a nervous, stuttering mess in front of y/n? And then everyone notices and teases him abt it. I think that would be so cute ahahah

(ooo yes I can!!)

Levi x reader

Shy boy..

☘️𝆤࿚࿙𝆤𝆤࿚۶ৎ𝆤࿙𝆤𖹭𝆤࿚𝆤۶ৎ࿙𝆤𝆤࿚࿙𝆤☘️

Levi sat down next to you in the mess Hall, he didn't look at you or at least not on purpose. The rest of his squad and commanders sat on the same table, chatting and laughing away. Levi noticed you had a couple of bruises on your hands from training and how you are struggling to hold the fork. He spoke up

"hey, if you hold it central it might be easier."

You looked over and did as he suggested, it was a bit easier than before and definitely made a difference.

"oh, that did help..thank you captain"

Your soft smile caused him to look away and just respond with a "mhm"

"have you had the same injury before?"

Your curiosity caught his attention again, he couldn't just ignore you, he showed you his hand which had lots of scars and bruises on. He didn't expect your hand to touch his.

"oi, watch it"

His eyes watched you carefully

"sorry, I just wanted to look...I didn't know you had so many."

Your fingers gently went over some of the scars along his fingers and knuckles. Levi's eyes softened, he was slightly confused and uncomfortable because he doesn't receive attention like this. You soon started asking questions

"do you do a lot of hand to hand combat?"

You kept his hand lightly in yours as your fingers traced his bruising

"i- yes I do...that's why they are s-scarred all the time.."

Levi tried to sound professional but the feeling of your fingers tracing his skin made it difficult for Levi to focus.

"oh cool, you must take care of yourself then...I mean your hands are still soft."

You smiled and Levi nodded, averted his gaze and not having the strength and confidence to pull his hand away.

Hange was on the other side of the table and her eyes met the little scene in front of her, she smiled wildly and nudge Erwin. Erwin looked over at Hange and followed her gaze, seeing Levi's blushing face as you asked questions about his scars and bruises, soon enough the whole table was secretly watching you both. Levi didn't take his eyes off you, you're asking so many questions and don't seem to be weirded out or somewhat disgusted by his scarred hands and bruises.

"does that mean that your hands are stronger now? The bones of course"

Your voice just made him embarrassed and he turned his head away, burying it in his coat

"Y-yeah...they are a-alot stronger.."

After a couple more minutes everyone started to get up, you said goodbye to Levi and he was left alone with Erwin Hange. They looked over at him.

"uh...well Levi, I didn't expect you to be the shy type-"

"s-shut the fuck up erwin."

Levi got up and walked away after snapping at Erwin, his face was all hot and red and he could hear his squad snickering about what happened, they teased and smirked.

Levi still felt the warmth of your hand tracing and holding his..

☘️𝆤࿚࿙𝆤𝆤࿚۶ৎ𝆤࿙𝆤𖹭𝆤࿚𝆤۶ৎ࿙𝆤𝆤࿚࿙𝆤☘️

#levi ackerman #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #levi ackerman x reader #headcanons #captain levi #levi #levi ackerman x female reader #levi aot #aot levi ackerman

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444takeomi · 6 months

Text

YOU’RE PERFECT

: ̗̀➛ summary: your boyfriend always seems to know how to make you feel better when you're insecure

character(s): shinichiro sano

warnings: female reader, nsfw, unprotected sex, mentions of body image issues and insecurities, multiple orgasms, oral (f receiving), fingering, mating press, creampie, mirror sex, love-making, praise, dirty talk, lots of body worship, crying during sex, v v sappy

wc: 4.2k

a/n: this one took me quite a while to write as it's very personal to me, i still kinda hate how it turned out but i hope some of you can relate to it and find comfort in it as well. i tried to be as non-specific as possible when describing the reader’s insecurities so apologies if it comes across as a bit vague, i tried my best ahahah

it was another one of those days, one that had you looking at your own reflection and hating everything you saw in front of you.

feeling uncomfortable in your own skin wasn’t exactly anything new to you, having felt unsatisfied with the way you looked for as long as you could remember. with that being said, today in particular had left you feeling much worse about yourself than usual, and you found yourself unable to refrain from picking apart your entire appearance. despite your best efforts at reassuring yourself that you didn't look as bad as you thought, nothing you said was able to provide you with any sort of comfort — if anything you just felt even more hopeless.

it had come to the point where it was almost hard to believe that the person staring back at you in the mirror was actually you. the sight of your own body straight up disgusted you, and you just couldn't understand how it was possible for someone to be so hideous. it was hard to even look at yourself — had it always been this bad? you didn't even want to think about it.

the way your clothes clung to your body did nothing except highlight how blatantly disproportionate your features were, and you were starting to regret your choice of not opting for something baggier when you got dressed this morning. oversized clothing was the only thing that you felt suited you nowadays, the loose fabric swallowing up your figure and concealing all of your flaws, temporarily putting your mind at ease and making you forget about the hard reality of what was hiding under those clothes.

you really tried to distract yourself, to do anything other than spend the entire day wallowing in self-pity over something as superficial as your appearance, but your feelings of self-consciousness persisted no matter how hard you tried to ignore them, which led you to where you were now — clothes scattered across the floor as you stared at the reflection of your bare figure, managing to somehow find fault in every part of yourself.

you knew that your boyfriend shin was living proof that you were indeed worthy of love, but you often found yourself wondering if you were really good enough for him — he was so handsome and tall with such a perfectly toned body, and not to mention he was the most hardworking person you knew, and overall was just an absolute sweetheart who always put everyone else's needs before his own.

he was so wonderful, and you couldn't help but think he deserved someone so much better.

it made matters worse when you subconsciously started comparing yourself to all the other girls shin had asked out in the past, focusing on everything they had that you lacked, appearance or otherwise, and you couldn't help but notice how they all had one thing in common — how absolutely gorgeous they all were. you wondered if shin was just settling when he finally asked you out, it would make sense given the fact that all those girls were clearly far more attractive than you ever were.

shin always looked at you with nothing but adoration, and even if at times you were unable to understand exactly why, it was still clear that he loved you with all his heart. however, no matter how hard you tried to block it out, you always found yourself listening to that little voice in the back of your mind — the one that repeatedly told you how unattractive you were, that you weren’t deserving of love, that you weren’t good enough.

you were so lost in thought that you didn't even hear as your boyfriend came home from work and greeted you from downstairs, too preoccupied with the heavy feeling in your chest as you fixated on every imperfection you saw whilst you stared at your own reflection. shin was a little worried upon not hearing you answer him, used to your usual cheerful welcome as you paused whatever you were doing to give him a warm hug and ask him about his day.

he began searching the house for you, checking each room before making his way upstairs, just to make sure that you were okay. he opened the door to your shared bedroom, and you watched through the reflection of the mirror as he walked in, feeling the sudden urge to cover your body with your hands and hide yourself from his gaze.

shin’s eyes widened ever so slightly at the sight in front of him, and he couldn't help but whistle lowly as he took in your naked figure in its entirety. he looked you up and down, in complete awe as he wondered how someone could be so beautiful without even trying. he felt a little giddy at the thought of you doing this on purpose to surprise him, especially after he'd had such a long day at work. he could feel his cock twitch in his pants as he shamelessly checked you out, his mind beginning to wander as his dark eyes clouded with lust.

“damn, baby. what did i do to deserve all—” shin paused, abruptly cutting himself off upon seeing your saddened expression as you turned to face him, “hey, what's the matter, sweetheart?”

you shook your head at him, averting your gaze in hopes that he wouldn't see the tears that were beginning to well up in your vision.

“it's nothing, i’m fine,” you sniffled, fingers coming up to gently pat at the corners of your eyes, “i just want to be alone right now.”

you didn't want to lie to him, in fact you desperately wanted to tell him everything that was on your mind, wanted him to comfort you and reassure you like he always did whenever you felt like this. the last thing you wanted to do was push him away, but at the same time you knew that you couldn't keep doing this to him. it was obvious how tired he was after a hard day's work, and the last thing he needed right now was you burdening him with something as pathetic as your own insecurities, but here you were.

“no, you're not,” needless to say shin wasn't convinced, easily seeing through your rather weak attempt at hiding how you were truly feeling from him, “i’m not going anywhere until you tell me what's wrong.”

you sighed, swallowing the lump in your throat as you desperately tried to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill. how could he be so perfect? he was always so kind and caring, so patient with you regardless of how exhausted he was after working so hard to provide for the both of you — you didn't know what you did to deserve him.

“why do i have to look like this?” you turned back towards the mirror, voice wobbly as you finally broke down crying, “i— no matter what i do i never feel good enough. i’m so sick of feeling like this, i just… i just wish i was pretty.”

“oh, sweetheart, come here,” shin came to wrap his arms around you, pulling you into his chest as he looked at you through the reflection of the mirror with so much love in his eyes, “you know i think you're perfect the way you are, i just wish you could see yourself the way i do.”

shin was familiar with your insecurities, and he always tried his best to console you despite the fact he couldn't possibly understand why you felt so negatively about yourself. he hated seeing you like this, hated seeing you unhappy with the body he loved so much, it made his heart ache. he didn't know why you constantly talked down on yourself, didn't know how you could be so blind to your own beauty when it was so obvious to him.

he wanted to show you the way he felt about your body, wanted to make you feel loved and desired. he knew that while he wouldn't be able to completely alleviate your feelings of insecurity, regardless of how much he wanted to, he hoped that if he carried on showing you exactly how much you meant to him that in time you would start to realise just how amazing you were.

“shin, w–what are you doing?” you asked, voice faltering as you felt his hands beginning to caress your sides, before they came to rest comfortably on your hips.

your breath hitched in your throat as he began placing open-mouthed kisses along your neck and shoulders, his hands kneading the flesh beneath his palms, and you couldn't help but lean into his touch as your eyes fluttered shut and you let out a sigh of pleasure.

“showing you just how gorgeous i think you are,” he replied lowly, his breath fanning against the shell of your ear, “is that okay, baby?”

“shin, you don't have to,” you insisted, biting your lip as he began sucking a hickey onto the skin of your neck, “you've— aah— you've had a long day, you should rest.”

“want you so bad,” he mumbled against your skin, pressing his erection into the curve of your ass, “been thinking about you all day, please?”

his words were making you needier than you would've liked to admit, looking into his dark eyes through the mirror as you began imagining all the things he was going to do to you. shin always made you feel so loved during sex, worshipping every inch of your body and telling you just how beautiful you were. the thought of that alone made you squeeze your thighs together as you nodded, knowing that despite how self-conscious you were feeling, deep down you really needed that kind of treatment right now.

you let out a soft gasp as he picked you up, carrying you over to the bed and carefully laying you down before hungrily pressing his lips against yours. you melted into the kiss, a small whine escaping your throat as soon as he pulled away.

“shhh, let me take care of you, pretty.”

you felt as his lips softly brushed against the valley of your breasts, his dark hair tickling your skin. he looked up at you, smiling fondly as you turned your head away in an attempt to avert your gaze elsewhere, embarrassed by the intimacy of it all. shin took your hand in his, gently squeezing it in hopes of reassuring you a little, before his head dipped back down and he began peppering more kisses over the entirety of your chest, his other hand squeezing your waist before coming to cup one of the mounds of flesh in his palm.

“my baby’s got the prettiest tits, i'm a lucky guy,” he told you, taking your nipple into his mouth and flicking his tongue over the hardened bud, his thumb running across the back of your hand that was interlaced with his own.

you squeezed your eyes shut, feeling too self-conscious to look at your own body as he touched you. as much as you tried to suppress them, several needy mewls and whimpers slipped past your lips as you softly ran your fingers through his hair. shin couldn't help but groan against your skin as he sucked your tit into his mouth, feeling his cock starting to leak in his pants as you arched your chest into him and the sounds of your sweet noises filled the room. once he was satisfied, he released your nipple with a pop, and you felt him eagerly switching to your other breast as he began giving it the same treatment.

after making sure both of your tits had been shown plenty of attention, he went back to kissing along your body, his lips trailing down your tummy as his hand came to gently rub and massage at your hip. you opened your eyes and immediately felt yourself stiffen — instantly noticing the way your stomach looked in your current position, and you just hoped that shin wasn't paying any mind to it.

your feelings weren't lost on him, he noticed the way you tensed up ever so slightly whenever he touched you in certain places, noticed the way your gaze seemed to land anywhere but his eyes. you were so easy to read, your reactions alone telling him everything he needed to know. shin couldn't help himself as he came up to kiss you once again, feeling the heat radiating from your face as his lips gently brushed against yours, before taking your hand that was still entwined with his and bringing it down towards the obvious tent in his pants.

“feel that? feel what your pretty body does to me?” he groaned, your fingers brushing against his aching cock, “you make me so fucking hard.”

you looked down shyly, feeling your face growing even hotter than it was already as you squirmed underneath him — his compliments and praises made your stomach flutter and goosebumps prickle across your skin.

shin made his way between your thighs, prying your legs apart as his lips began trailing sloppily along your skin, gently squeezing the soft flesh beneath his palms. you could feel yourself growing embarrassingly wet as you watched him, excitement beginning to pool in your gut as his dark eyes locked with yours and his mouth gradually made its way closer towards your awaiting heat.

“such a pretty pussy, m’gonna make you feel so fucking good,” he drawled, staring at you in awe before he started pressing open-mouthed kisses over your slit, splitting your folds apart with his tongue and groaning at the taste of your slick.

shin was entirely fixated on you as your face contorted in pleasure, your chest rising and falling with each shaky breath as he took your clit between his lips, his mouth hungrily latching onto the swollen bud. one of your hands instinctively came up to cover part of your face, worried that your expression was off-putting and that you looked especially unattractive from this angle, but your boyfriend wasn't having any of it. he grabbed hold of your wrist, guiding your hand away and granting him a full view of your cute face, watching in infatuation as your brows furrowed and your mouth fell slightly agape.

he couldn't help but growl into you, the vibrations making you jolt in pleasure as you let out a squeal, feeling yourself throbbing against his tongue as you clamped your thighs around his head. shin lifted your legs over his shoulders, giving him complete access to you — he could feel himself slowly losing all remaining self-restraint as he proceeded to absolutely devour you. he continued to slurp at your clit, flicking his tongue over the nub and moaning loudly into your folds, unable to stop himself from humping the mattress below him when you began eagerly grinding your pussy against his face.

that familiar feeling started to build up in your gut, his mouth already drawing you towards your release. before you even had the chance to tell him you were close, you felt your orgasm rip through you, throwing your head back as your whole body tensed up and incoherent, broken whimpers of his name fell from your lips. both of your hands came to tangle themselves in his hair, rolling your hips against his face and practically suffocating him with your cunt as you rode out your orgasm.

once you had come down from your high, shin began stripping himself of his usual white t-shirt and jeans, and you watched as his gorgeous body was revealed to you in all of its entirety. you couldn't help but feel your thoughts of insecurity starting to resurface once again, overcome with the urge to hide yourself from him even after he had just been between your thighs. it didn't take long for shin to notice the way you suddenly began to shy away from him, and so he pulled you into another soft yet deep kiss, holding your face in his hands and gently caressing along your jaw as his lips moulded with yours.

after the two of you pulled apart, he briefly pressed his forehead against yours, his fingertips lightly brushing up and down your arm in a soothing manner, before his hands settled themselves on the backs of your thighs. he pushed your legs upwards and folded you in half, pressing his hardened cock against your pussy as he began to gently glide the head over your soaked folds, sliding the tip right against your sensitive clit. you cried out, your walls clenching around nothing as you clutched onto his shoulders, nails pressing crescent shapes into his skin.

“patience, sweetheart,” he whispered in your ear, taking your earlobe between his teeth and softly nibbling on the flesh.

you felt as the tip came to rest at your entrance before he carefully slipped himself inside of you, his thick cock stretching you out and filling you to the brim. he let out a low grunt as you clamped down on him, biting his lip as he stilled himself inside of you and buried his face into the crook of your neck.

“you're so beautiful, can't believe you're mine, my pretty girl,” he continued to murmur sweet praises against your skin, his hand interlocking with yours as he began thrusting into you.

“shin, i— mmmh! ahhh, please—!” you mewled, indistinct babbles and whimpers falling uncontrollably from your lips at the feeling of every inch of his cock dragging slowly against your walls.

“i know, baby, i know. just— fuuuck, just sit back and let me make you feel good, okay?”

it was all too much, but in the best possible way. everything just felt so right, from the feeling of his chest pressing against yours to the way he meticulously worked his hips into you at the perfect angle. a sweet slapping sound began to fill the room, alongside the combination of his needy groans and whines about how good you felt in your ear, mixed with your sobs of pleasure at the feeling of his pubic bone brushing against your clit. shin looked at you with so much love, like you were the most beautiful thing he had ever laid eyes on — it made tears start to well up in your eyes, but this time they weren't from sadness.

in that moment you just felt so appreciated, to the point where all of your insecurities and self-critical thoughts momentarily left your mind as you completely lost yourself in pleasure, unable to think of anything else aside from how good it all felt. your boyfriend’s thumb came to wipe your tears away before his lips locked with yours, the pair of you moaning desperately into each other’s mouths as his thrusts picked up in pace, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix as he fucked you deep.

shin was reluctant to break the kiss, addicted to the feeling of your lips against his in combination with your walls squeezing around his cock. however, the way his lungs were practically begging for oxygen didn't give him much choice in the matter, and he found himself gasping for breath as he pulled away, his eyes squeezed shut as his brows furrowed in pleasure. you reached upwards to hold his face in your hand, the other refusing to let go of his own as you interlaced your fingers together. shin leaned down to press his forehead against yours as his hips began to stutter, his pace faltering as he felt himself drawing closer to his own release.

“fuck— baby, m’gonna cum. gonna cum deep inside this pretty fuckin’ pussy,” he growled, feeling as your walls clamped down on him at his words, “yeah, you like that? want me to cream inside this tight little cunt? fill you up nice and full?”

“mhm, yes please— ahhh! want your cum, shin, please don't stop, i— mmh, need to feel you…”

“that's my good girl. take it, take it— fuck, that’s it, baby. such a good girl for me.”

he finished with a few sloppy thrusts, burying his face into the crook of your neck as he fell over the edge, his hot cum shooting into you in several thick ropes. you could feel your clit throbbing as you clenched around him, the heat between your thighs continuing to grow as you watched shin ride out his orgasm.

his cock began to soften as he gently slipped himself out of you, watching intently as his cum dribbled out of your hole. he was well aware that he had reached his high before you did, eager to get you off again and bring you to another orgasm — tonight was supposed to be about you, after all. before you could oppose, he sat you at the edge of the bed with you in his lap, facing you towards the mirror so that you could look at yourself.

“wanna make you cum on my fingers, baby,” he mumbled into your ear, spreading your legs apart as his hand made its way between your thighs, “want you to see how pretty you are when you cum nice and hard for me.”

two of his digits circled your entrance before he slowly pushed them inside, taking note of how easily they slipped into you after having previously stretched you out with his cock. he began curling them upwards, softly massaging your g-spot while his other hand came to caress your waist, travelling down towards your hip and then back up again. shin placed several kisses along your neck before his hand suddenly picked up in pace, the heel of his palm smacking against your clit as his fingers pumped in and out of you and a wet sticky sound proceeded to fill the room.

“look at you, so fucking gorgeous,” he told you, looking at you through the reflection in complete awe as his hand began roaming across your body, “so perfect here… and here… and right here, too.”

the more you stared at your own reflection, the more different you felt from earlier. your eyes no longer seemed to gravitate towards everything that you thought was wrong with you, and it was as if you were just simply seeing yourself as you were in that present moment, just existing within your body. you couldn't take your eyes off the mirror and suddenly you found yourself wanting to watch — wanting to watch him touch you, wanting to watch his hands trail over every part of your body, wanting to watch yourself fall apart because of him.

you wanted shin to watch too, how could you not when his eyes showed nothing but love and adoration for you and your body?

you could feel your legs beginning to shake and you found yourself frantically bucking your hips into his hand, your orgasm rapidly approaching as you grabbed onto his wrist and abruptly fell over the edge once again. you began gasping and whimpering as your vision turned white and you creamed all over his fingers, and shin watched your reflection in admiration as you came down from your high — the only thing he could think was how beautiful you looked in that moment as you completely let go, your eyes rolling back as you were consumed by pleasure.

once you had fully rode out your orgasm, shin gently removed his fingers from you, the two of you sitting in a peaceful silence knowing that words didn't need to be exchanged right away and you could just enjoy one another’s presence for a moment. he wrapped his arms around your waist, resting his head on your shoulder as his lips brushed against your skin.

“are you feeling a little better now, sweetheart?” he asked you, finally breaking the silence.

“mhm, definitely,” you nodded, feeling yourself starting to smile, “thank you, shin.”

while you were aware that this feeling wasn't going to be permanent, and that there would still be days to come in the future where you would feel unsatisfied with your body again, you knew that if nothing else, your sweet boyfriend would always be there to help you slowly start to love yourself a little more.

“i should take a shower,” he pondered, unable to stop himself from grinning as he added, “care to join me?”

you rolled your eyes, trying to fight back a smile but ultimately failing as your expression mirrored his own and you nodded, feeling as he excitedly took your hand and led you towards the bathroom. the two of you stepped into the shower, the warm water running over your tired bodies as you helped wash away the sweat and cum from each other’s skin. as to be expected, you both found yourselves unable to keep your hands off each other, and one thing slowly led to another which ultimately resulted in the two of you fooling around once again, not that either of you were complaining.

and afterwards shin pulled you into his chest and just held you, wrapping his arms around your waist as he mumbled soft praises into your skin that were barely loud enough for you to hear. although there was one which you were just about able to make sense of, and you felt your heart flutter as you realised what it was that he had said to you.

“i love the way your body feels against mine.”

please do not translate, repost, or share my writing on any other platforms eg. tiktok

#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers x reader #shinichiro sano #shinichiro x reader #shinichiro x you #✩444.writings #✩444.fics

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