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#my head hurts but i like how these two came out
d1xonss · 2 days
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Cigarettes After Sex
✧ Pairing : Daryl Dixon x Reader
✧ Era : Season 11
✧ Pronouns : she/her
✧ Genre : ⚠️ Smut (18+) and a lil bit of angst
✧ Word Count : 5.6k
AN ~ Not a request but I had this idea that I just couldn't get out of my head. Plus I've been in the mood to write something a little spicy since you guys liked the Older oneshots so much. Hope you enjoy!
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Your eyes stayed focused on the pages of the book you were reading in front of you in the smoke filled garage, occasionally turning the pages to continue on with the chapter. In the background you could hear the tools clinking around, along with a few curses that fell from his lips when he couldn’t get something just right. Every once and a while you couldn’t help but look up and stare at him for a few seconds, knowing the real reason you came out here to keep him company while he worked.
Over the past twelve, long years you had known Daryl, you still didn’t exactly know what you were to each other. Some would call the two of you friends, and though that may be true, you always knew there was something a little more there than what meets the eye. And you knew he felt it too, but neither of you were willing to admit that out loud. Too hardheaded, you supposed.
It always caught your attention when he left a few lingering touches on your skin, how he embraced you so dearly as if you were the most important person in the world, or even how he occasionally left a small kiss on your forehead. You couldn’t help but think he did all of these things for a reason, as if to ease you into something that he was always terrified of. And hell, maybe he was easing himself into it too.
You always knew he was never much of a romantic person, he never quite showed interest in anyone else the way he always did with you. Though when he finally did open his heart up to a woman named Leah all those many years ago, he got absolutely crushed in the process, leaving you heartbroken for him as you witnessed him go through it all. In the back of your mind, you hoped it would work out between the two of them because you knew he deserved someone that would treat him right. And though that person may not have been you, it didn’t matter, as long as he was happy. That’s all you had ever wanted for him.
However, you couldn’t help but notice ever since he got hurt, he had been slowly pulling away from you. Not in a way that was drastic, but you always seemed to notice the little things. He had completely stopped showing you affection whatsoever which was very out of character for him considering how close you were. All of the little things he used to do that would make you smile, he had brought to a halt without warning. The only thing that he really did now was just a small squeeze on your shoulder, and that’s only if you were lucky.
It frustrated you slightly, not because of his sudden wall he built up, but because subconsciously he thought you would hurt him the same way she did. He was now scared that the same thing would happen all over again. And it bothered you in a way he could never understand. Because after all you had been through together, he still didn’t seem to know you at all.
“Pass me that screwdriver, will ya?”
Your thoughts cut short when he started to speak, absentmindedly nodding your head as you turned towards the toolbox that was placed right next to you. You dug through them for a moment before you spotted the familiar red handle, grabbing it and stretching your arm out to hand it over to him.
He met your hand halfway as he accepted it gratefully, “Thanks.” he muttered with a small smile, the cigarette still dangling from his lips as he spoke.
You nodded before watching him for another moment, tilting your head to the side, “What’re you fixing up anyway?”
He shrugged as his eyes stayed down, “Just some repairs…nothin too fancy.” he spoke, his eyebrows furrowing as he worked.
“Ah.” you muttered with a small nod, going back to your book as you assumed he didn’t want to be bothered while he focused.
Though upon hearing your small mutter, the quietness taking over the space, Daryl subtly looked back up at you for a moment. He knew things had been different, way different than what the two of you were used to, and a part of him felt bad. Mostly because he knew it was his own fault. He had pushed you away when you had done nothing wrong, and he felt guilty for it every single day.
With that in mind, he cleared his throat as he took a puff from his cigarette, “Ya still want me to teach ya?” he asked, his tone growing softer than before.
You glanced up from your book again, seeing the small smile he had on his face as he reminded you of something you had requested a long time ago. You had rode on the back of his motorcycle many times before, but a part of you wanted to learn how to ride all by yourself. And he clearly remembered.
A smile wormed its way onto your face as well as you nodded, “Yeah…yeah I’d like that.”
He nodded in return as he went back to tuning up his bike, “Gotta start ya off slow though. Can’t have ya crashin into some tree the first time ya get on.”
You couldn’t help but laugh to yourself with a roll of your eyes, “Right, we probably wouldn’t want that. But I think I’ll have a pretty good teacher…I’m not too worried.”
His heart swelled, though you couldn’t see, but that comment touched him in a way, “Yeah?” he asked as he looked back up at you.
You nodded again, “I trust you.”
You trusted him. That little comment meant more to him than you could even fathom. It meant that after all the things he had put you through, all the things he regretted, you still loved and trusted him just the same. He couldn’t help but pause for a long moment as he contemplated all of that, how only a few little words could mean the absolute world.
Though when he was lost in his own mind, the cigarette that he now held between his two fingers, slightly burned his skin as some hot ash fell from the tip. He let out a small noise as he shook it off, only now noticing how smokey the space was from how much he was chain smoking with you in the room. He knew you never cared, but a part of him still felt a little bad.
“Sorry.” he muttered as he raised his hand to fan the area a bit, “Didn’t realize how much I hotboxed ya.” he chuckled a little.
You laughed it off as well, waving him off, “You know I don’t mind. Actually I kinda like the smell.”
He raised his eyebrow a bit at the unexpected comment, looking down to the stick in his grasp as he thought about your words for a moment, “Ya never told me that.” he muttered.
You shrugged, “Never really came up I guess. But I don’t know, it’s always kind of been comforting.”
Daryl silently knew what that meant without you even having to explain. And that only made his chest fill with even more warmth than before, knowing he was the reason behind your words. He knew he meant a lot to you, but just hearing you say that his bad habit was somewhat of a comfort to you, it almost made his mindset shift.
You absentmindedly closed your book as you noticed he grew quiet, “You know any cool tricks?” you asked with a smirk.
He huffed quietly with a small smile, wordlessly taking another hit and holding it for a moment before effortlessly blowing it out in small spurts, the smoke forming into little o shapes in the air. You nodded to yourself as you watched him, “Solid.”
He chuckled a little, “Thank you, thank you.” he said as he bowed his head a bit.
Tilting your head a little, you thought to yourself about any more little tidbits he might have experienced, “Have you ever shotgunned it?” 
He raised an eyebrow at you, “Who’s askin?”
“Me.” you smiled sweetly.
He found himself chuckling again, shaking his head as a few memories came to mind, “Uh yeah…yeah I have.” he admitted a bit sheepishly, hoping you wouldn’t ask for any details.
A hum passed through your lips in response, opening your mouth to speak again, though he seemed to beat you to it, “You ever done anything like that?”
You scoffed, “Who’s asking?”
But he didn’t answer you. He only stared at you with the same small smile, however, there seemed to be something a little more behind his eyes. Though you couldn’t tell what that was, it intrigued you slightly. “No…” you answered honestly.
“Ya wanna try?”
It felt like your heart had dropped and settled into your stomach, swearing that you heard him wrong. “You’re not serious.”
But the smile on his face only grew a little, confirming to you just how serious he was as he nodded for you to come closer to him, “Come here.”
In all honesty he didn’t know what he was doing, and seeing the shock on your face only made the small pit in his stomach grow further, though he didn’t show it. He couldn’t really think in that moment at all about how this could be perceived, all he knew was that he wanted to be closer to you. Suddenly having a craving for it, having been without it for far too long.
A few beats of tense silence passed before you finally found the strength to stand to your feet, moving closer towards him as he stood tall as well. You tilted your head back a bit as you looked up at him, standing just a few inches away as you almost waited for him to instruct you on what to do next. Because in all honesty, you didn’t know what you were doing. 
His eyes traced over your face for a moment, almost wanting to ask you to stand a little bit closer to him, but ultimately he refrained. He knew he couldn’t be greedy with you, not when you were already so precious to him. He only held the cigarette out towards you, watching as your delicate hand took it from his grasp, all while never removing your gaze from his.
“Go on and take a long drag.” he instructed, his voice coming off in an anticipating whisper.
You only nodded your head in response, placing the end of it in between your lips as you slowly inhaled all the smoke it had to offer. Daryl couldn’t help but stare down at your lips the entire time, he studied you in the most mesmerizing way it almost caused you to choke on your own spit. Yet you still couldn’t tell what he was thinking, and it made you grow a little frustrated all over again.
Your heart then fluttered when the smoke filled your lungs, taking the cigarette away from your mouth as you leaned up on your tiptoes to get closer to him. His hand instinctively came up to cradle your jaw as he pulled you even closer to his lips, feeling them barely brush against each other before the blissful feeling would soon wash over the two of you.
Exhaling the smoke, you blew the thick cloud right into his mouth, hearing a quiet groan leave him in response. It surprised you how good it felt, how your skin practically ignited with fire at his simple sound of enjoyment, it made your mind wander to a very dangerous place. His hand didn’t stray away from your face as he inhaled the smoke until he physically couldn’t anymore, the craving he felt only building to a new level as a part of him wanted to taste you. Just for a moment.
But the thought vanished, everything crashing down in an instant as he felt you pull away from his mouth, clearing your throat a bit. His eyes fluttered open to see you standing there awkwardly, not knowing what to say as the two of you had never dared to cross this line before in the past.
“Well, I guess now I can cross that one off the bucket list.” you joked with a small, forced laugh.
“Do it again.”
Your eyes snapped back up to meet his as he spoke with zero hesitation in his tone, not even acknowledging that you made a comment at all. “What?” you asked quietly.
He took a small breath before speaking again, repeating the phrase, “Do it again.”
If you weren’t stunned before, you sure as hell were now as you stood almost frozen before him. To say it was one thing, but to repeat it with such confidence was another. He was serious. What started out as just a suggestion, now turned into something a lot more real.
But you found you didn’t protest. Because you wanted it too.
You then held the cigarette back up to your lips, inhaling it all over again as you were surprised you didn’t cough even once in the whole process. His eyes practically lit up as he saw you repeat the action, mentally preparing himself for the familiar feeling that would hit him all over again. But the thing he couldn’t get past was that he had never felt it before now. He only felt it with you. And it was very surreal.
Your perfect lips parted from the cigarette after what felt like a lifetime of waiting, moving back up to him to exhale the smoke into his mouth once more. The man breathed it in as if he needed it to stay alive, his hands coming up to your arms to hold you in place as if he was scared you would pull away again. But you didn’t. You couldn’t. Not even if you wanted to. The slightest brush of your lips made your breath hitch, but before you could even register what you were doing, you pressed your lips firmly to his. It almost didn’t feel real.
Daryl responded immediately, instantly bringing you into him as he wrapped his arms around you to hold you closer to his chest. Your hands went up to the sides of his face, tilting your head a bit so your noses wouldn’t clash so much, the kiss intensifying in just a split second. It was like all the years of the built up tension, the built up feelings, were now finally being unleashed after so long of waiting. You supposed before it was never the right time, but now, it couldn’t have felt more perfect.
His tongue moved to run along your lips almost teasingly, begging for an entrance as his hands gripped you even tighter. And you accepted his request, parting your lips for him and feeling his excitement grow as he didn’t take it for granted. His tongue swirled rapidly in your mouth, letting out a groan of pleasure as he tasted your sweetness. You shivered slightly at the low rumble you heard from him, something about it turning you on even more as you had never heard that sound from him before. It was like a switch flipped.
He continued to absolutely devour your mouth, his hands now running down the curves of your body in a slow and teasing manner, taking his time. You gasped softly as you felt your skin almost tingling under his touch, wanting to feel him everywhere. So without thinking, you quickly moved your hands down to his chest as you frantically began to try and tear his shirt off of him. Your fingers worked on each of the buttons, though you couldn’t see what you were doing, it all felt like it was happening so fast you almost had no time to prepare yourself.
But in a fit of panic, Daryl quickly pulled back from your mouth as the feeling of you trying to take off his shirt finally registered in his mind. He still remained close to you, but his sudden actions stopped you from yours, your hands freezing in place as it was clear you had pushed him too far. But your expression was filled with confusion and concern as you couldn’t understand why he looked almost scared to go any further.
He sighed as his eyes remained closed, almost ashamed to look at your face as he gently leaned forward to rest his forehead against yours. “I…I can’t.” he whispered.
Your eyes seemed to widen as it clicked in your mind. He hadn’t done anything like this since Leah. Since he had been burned so badly by her. Since he was left shattered and heartbroken because of what she did to him. He opened up to her unlike anyone else, and she left him. A lump formed in your throat as the realization set in for you, seeing just how scared he was for this to potentially happen to him all over again.
“I can’t do this, I…I can’t lose you too.”
You sighed softly as you shook your head, your hands tilting his face up a little more, “Hey, look at me.” 
He simply shook his head, his eyes remaining closed, “Daryl, look at me.” you pleaded quietly.
When he did finally open his eyes, you could see he was starting to tear up, breaking your heart even further. Not only to see how much he was hurting, but how much he was truly terrified to lose you. Although in your mind, that wasn’t even a possibility.
“You couldn’t lose me, okay? Ever.” you whispered, “I’m not going anywhere. You know me…I would never hurt you like that. Never.”
Upon hearing your voice reassure him so sweetly, his tears slowly slipped down his cheeks, watching as he swallowed thickly to try and pull himself together. But you didn’t want him to be embarrassed. You understood more than he probably realized. Which is why you were quick to wipe them away with your thumbs, leaning up to kiss the ones you had missed in hopes to offer him even more comfort.
He shuttered under your touch, quickly finding your lips with his own again as he kissed you deeply, holding the back of your head steady as his lips were filled with passion. You responded to his kiss with hesitance, not wanting to push him again as you didn’t have a clear response to how he was feeling. But once you felt him take your hands, guiding them back up to the buttons on his shirt, you had your answer.
In a flurry of hurried kisses and laughs, nearly tripping over one another as you tried to make it back inside the house, the two of you finally landed on the couch in the living room. Neither of you really cared about trying to make it all the way upstairs, almost as if it was a silent agreement that you were both impatient. You panted heavily as each piece of fabric was being discarded onto the floor faster than you could even realize, yet his hands moved across your skin with such ease and gentleness. The action alone told you a thousand things, and yet he didn’t need to say a word.
You quickly lowered yourself to your knees the second you saw the opportunity, getting in between his legs as he sat on the couch. His eyes widened at your actions, “Aye, you don’t gotta-”
But his words were cut off with a groan as you lowered your mouth to the tip of his dick, darting your tongue out to slowly swirl around and tease him the smallest bit. You knew you didn’t have to, but you wanted him to feel special for once, you wanted him to feel important and loved. And besides, you just couldn’t help yourself as your mouth practically watered at the sight. And the small noises he was letting out as you licked sensually along his shaft, was almost like a reward of some kind.
He threw his head back slightly as his hands went up to hold your hair back for you, feeling you teasingly lower your lips just a little at a time to take more of him in your mouth. It was almost like torture with how slow you were going, but it was also the most enjoyable torture he could even endure. His muscles twitched in anticipation and he was already beginning to sweat, clenching his teeth together all the while.
“Come on,” he muttered breathlessly, talking more to himself than he was to you.
But you still took it as a sign, seeing he had enough and finally lowered your mouth even more to take him further. A shaky moan left his parted lips at your actions, hissing slightly when he felt your teeth barely brushing against him as well, though it wasn’t enough to hurt. Just enough to get his attention. You then began slowly bobbing your head up and down the length of him, swirling your tongue and hollowing out your cheeks to really make him squirm. His hands tightened around your hair in response, another low groan echoing around the room as he basked in the state of pleasure you provided.
His breathing grew heavier and heavier by the second, growing even more sensitive to you as your pace began to gradually pick up, trying to take even more of him in your mouth. You couldn’t lie though, he was bigger than what you had experienced in the past, which made you almost nervous. But hearing what you were doing to him so far, it gave you the right motivation you needed to keep going.
“F-Fuck.” he breathed as the tip of his dick hit the back of your throat, feeling your hands running up and down his thighs as you tried not to gag. Though he felt you struggle a bit, pulling your hair up slightly as if signaling you that you could ease up if you needed, but you didn’t. He felt too good in your mouth for you to want to stop.
Your head then moved a bit faster, taking him as deep as you could as you heard his whimpers and moans, not even trying to hold them back anymore. He wanted to make it known how good you were making him feel, just the sound of it was enough to make you wet, and he hadn’t even touched you yet. Your spit soaked him completely, making it almost easier to take him entirely in your mouth as you felt him hit the back of your throat almost every time with each pass.
His breath hitched, “Oh shit,” he muttered as he tried to regulate his breathing, “Ya need to get up here…come on.” he almost pleaded.
And you didn’t need to be told twice, feeling how hard he was now he was nearly throbbing in your mouth, knowing he was close to falling apart. So your lips slowly parted from his aching dick, leaving a few lingering kisses behind before you slowly stood back up to your feet with a smile. Looking at his face now, he gazed at you as if you put all the stars in the sky, as if you painted him the most beautiful sunset you could’ve ever laid your eyes on. Or as if you had given him the best head of his life.
He watched as you wiped your mouth from the spit that nearly dribbled down your chin, quickly reaching forward to pull you in and crash his mouth against yours, licking your lips completely clean. You giggled in response to his eagerness, attempting to remove your thong as it was the last thing in the way, struggling to kick it off your ankles. Though the moment it hit the ground, you instantly moved forward and broke away from his mouth for only a moment, straddling his hips as you hovered on top of him.
The man nearly gawked at the sight of you, “God…” he muttered as if he couldn’t find the words. But you knew what he was getting at, knowing that his actions always spoke louder than his words ever could. And he only proved that further when he lowered his mouth to one of your breasts, sucking gently at your nipple to elicit a small whimper from you.
You could feel his lip curl up in response to your little noises, his hand coming up to gently massage the other with his rough fingers. The scratchiness of his calloused palms made it even better somehow, the sensation sending a shiver down your spine as you lowered yourself a little more onto him in response. He hummed at your actions, encouraging you to continue as his mouth worked wildly along your breast.
One of your hands then moved down to gently guide his tip towards you, running it up and down your slit to gather the wetness that pooled there. Your chest heaved up and down as you were almost overwhelmed with the tingles running through your entire body, nearly causing you to shake. 
Daryl’s mouth then dragged all across your skin, leaving a small trail of small hickies along your chest, groaning as you continued to play with him a little. Your other hand came up to run through his hair, tilting your head back a little as you dragged his dick up to circle around your pulsing clit. That seemed to cause you both to gasp, the slow and tormenting teasing beginning to be too much as Daryl quickly removed his mouth from you, his hands moving to your hips as if to position you in the most perfect way he could.
You followed his lead as your hands moved up to his shoulders to steady yourself, feeling him move his dick down to your entrance to align himself with you. And when you finally sunk down onto him, it felt like absolute heaven. A long, slow moan left your lips as your eyes rolled to the back of your head, hearing a harsh grunt escape him as he tried to refrain from pounding into you. He knew he needed to take his time, wanting to draw this out for as long as he could as if it were the first and last time. He hoped for more, he prayed for more, but he knew it was never guaranteed.
His forehead fell to rest in the middle of your chest as the two of you basked in the pure errotic experience, slowly managing to move your hips once you were ready. It was slow at first, gradually easing into it as you lowered yourself back down onto him again and again, your hands moving to grip the back of his hair. He groaned as he felt you tug a little at his roots, but in all honesty, he didn’t care. In fact, he liked it.
You moaned softly as you rocked your hips against his, pulling almost all the way off of him before he filled you completely once more. What you were feeling was almost indescribable, not having felt it with any other man you had been intimate with in your entire life. But with him, it felt so different, so incredibly good. Like his body was made for yours, fitting together perfectly like a puzzle piece you had been missing for far too long. And you weren’t the only one feeling like that, with him squirming beneath you, it was just a sign to not stop your movements anytime soon.
You bounced on him at a steady pace as you balanced yourself, feeling his hand travel down to rub slow circles along your clit with his thumb. You nearly cried out in response, your heart racing out of your chest, “Oh fuck…yes.” you breathed as his pace quickened.
“Yeah? Ya like that?” he asked as his face moved close to whisper in your ear, feeling his teeth gently bite down on your earlobe.
Your mouth fell open in response as you gasped, nodding your head frantically, “Yes…yes.” you moaned as you continued to rock against him, feeling your wetness drip all over him with how aroused you were.
“Mmm,” he hummed his mouth traveling down to kiss along your jawline, “You’re doin so good sweetheart.” he breathed as he held back a groan, “So good.”
His praise only spurred you on more, your fingers tugging a bit harder at his hair which caused him to groan, thrusting his hips up into you to match your pace. The sinful sounds that escaped you should never be heard by anyone, you couldn’t even believe you were the one making them. But he was the one to cause all those little reactions, adding something more to push you over the edge. And it was working too, you had felt it ever since you were down on your knees in front of him. The familiar tingling in your stomach was building to the point where it could spill over at any moment.
He panted heavily as he began to suck on the base of your neck, “I love you…God, I love you.” he whispered.
The words threw you off guard for a moment as your eyes widened, but you didn’t stop, nor were you scared to say it back. “I love you too.” you responded breathlessly.
That phrase had gone unspoken between the two of you for years, constantly avoiding saying it to each other for no reason at all. Perhaps it was stubbornness, or just the fear of the feelings not being reciprocated. But for whatever reason, this moment alone brought it out to the open. And it couldn’t have felt better.
Daryl thrusted deeper into you upon hearing your response, causing you to gasp as you felt the string finally snap inside you, releasing your orgasm as your muscles twitched. Feeling you squeezing him, he cursed as he quickly pulled himself out of you in one swift motion, cumming all over your stomach. You could’ve sworn your vision went black for a moment as you slowly came down from your blissful high, not a word being said for a few minutes at least as you both tried to regain yourselves. 
His head rested against your chest again, his lips beginning to leave a trail of kisses up your skin as your eyes were still hazy, leading them up to your neck where he nuzzled his face, pulling you close to his chest. You hummed in response, running your fingers through his hair as you thought to yourself for a moment, finally finding the strength to speak.
“Did you…really mean that?” you whispered hesitantly.
He pulled his face back to look at you, his head still too far up in the clouds that he clearly didn’t hear you. The big grin on his face was evidence of that. “Hm?”
You huffed with a small smile, “The whole…I love you thing…did you really mean it? Or was it like the heat of the moment.”
His brows furrowed in concern as he gently cupped the sides of your face, “Of course I meant it. I love you.” he repeated again, as if to make sure you really heard him.
You smiled in slight relief, “Did you mean it?” he asked with a smirk.
“Yes.” you said with a breathy laugh, “I just…wanted to make sure.”
“I don’t say things I don’t mean, darlin,” he said as he leaned in to rub his nose against yours lovingly, “I’ve always loved ya…my dumbass just took too long to admit it.”
You shook your head in response, “It’s okay. I understand why.”
He sighed quietly as he thought about how much he may have missed out on, how much went down the drain just because he was scared. Not only to have his heartbroken, but to potentially lose one of his best friends if you didn’t feel the same way he did. There was always a risk, but he let the fear consume him, and now he was kicking himself for it seeing how easy it was to be with you. He should’ve always known, and now he felt he was too late.
You quickly noticed his change in his expression and gently tilted his chin up so he’d look at you, “Hey…what’s wrong?”
He shook his head, “M’ just…m’ sorry.”
“For what?” you asked in confusion.
“For not actin on this years ago. For pushin ya away when I was hurtin just because I was nervous about it happenin all over again.” he stopped suddenly to gather his thoughts, “I just feel like I wasted so much time.” he finished with a whisper.
Your face was filled with worry about hearing him apologize for something that he had nothing to be sorry for. It hurt you seeing how much this was affecting him, knowing that the two of you should be happy that it finally happened. Not wanting to dwell on the past.
You leaned in to gently kiss his lips for a moment, pulling away enough to speak, “Well, it’s a good thing we got all the time in the world now.” you smiled.
His eyes slowly filled with a little more hope, “You mean…”
“Yeah,” you nodded, “I love you.” 
He let out a small breath he was unaware he was holding, pulling you close to press multiple kisses all over your face, “I love you too.” he whispered, continuing to trace his lips wherever he could reach, igniting an infectious laugh from you.
It seemed his prayers were answered. 
~ Thanks for reading!
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yoonivy · 3 days
Text
symptom of your touch.
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modern!aemond targaryen x fem!reader
genre. smut & angst. friends with benefits.
All through his life, Aemond got used to it; toiling for the things that Aegon is freely given. But you… You were the only exception. Aemond cannot bear to lose you to Aegon too.
warnings. rough sex, creampie, breeding kink, dirty talk & degradation, mirror sex. unrequited love.
author’s note. titled after the aly & aj song but also heavily inspired by a taylor swift song!
word count. 7k+
--
It is Aegon who invited you to come over to watch movies with his family that night. 
But when you make the two second walk from your front door to his just next door, your best friend isn’t even there.
“Where is he?”
Daeron shrugs at your question, opening the door wider so you can step inside the Targaryen household. “Dunno. He left, like, half an hour ago, though.”
You heave a sigh, tapping the phone in your hand. 
To Aegon — where are you????
You hear their mother, Alicent, calling you from the kitchen so you make your way there.
“Hey, sweetie,” she greets with a gentle smile when she sees you. “Have you ate, yet?”
You nod, slipping onto an island stool beside Helaena. “I ate dinner just before I came over.”
You caress your hand on Aegon’s younger sister’s arm as a form of hello and she smiles sweetly at you while her mother lifts up a tupperware for you to see. “Well there’s leftovers here if you get hungry later, okay?”
“Thanks, Alicent,” you chirp as Alicent stores the food inside the refrigerator. 
After an exhausted huff that causes the tendrils of the loosened hair from her bun to fly, Alicent still manages to give you a grin. “No problem, my love,” then with a frown, she looks down at the smatchwatch on her wrist. “Do you know where Aegon is? I thought we’re having a movie night?”
You shake your head. “I texted him but he hasn’t answered yet.”
“That boy… I swear…” 
“Let’s just start without him,” Daeron suggests, strolling into the room to grab a can of Coke from the fridge. Alicent grabs the drink from his grasp before he could open it.
“You’ve already had too much today,” is all Alicent says when the soon to be high school senior whines out ‘mooom!’ .
“We can watch a movie we know he won’t like first so he doesn’t get mad when he comes back during the middle of it,” Helaena speaks up just as your phone vibrates with a new message.
From Aegon — i’ll be back soon 😘 — just start without me
You scowl, noting that he didn’t really answer your question. But whatever. 
“Aegon said to start without him,” you tell his family. 
Alicent sighs, head shaking. Then she turns to Helaena with a smile, “Bug, can you pick the movie?”
Helaena nods enthusiastically, hopping off the stool to do just that.
“Daeron, help me with the snacks,” Alicent instructs, already grabbing bowls from the cupboards. “And ____, sweetie, can you get Aemond? He’s in his room.”
The request has you gnawing on your bottom lip, reluctant, but you take a deep breath and say, “Yeah, sure.”
Alicent looks over her shoulder, kind eyes on you. “Thank you.”
Then her attention is back on Daeron, who once again tries to open a can of pop. “Daeron!”
You leave them to enter the small hallway, stopping at the bottom of the staircase. You stare up at the second floor, anxiousness twisting knots in your stomach. 
You have not spoken to Aemond since the party at Quentyn Martell’s last weekend.
You still remember the crushing look of hurt on his handsome face when you told him what you needed to tell him, all too well.
Every step you take up the stairs reminds you how awful you’ve been to him all summer. It was completely unintentional, but you can’t deny how selfish you’ve been. Especially since you know that Aemond would be willing to do it over and over again if you only asked him to.
You rap on Aemond’s door with the back of your hand, hearing him call from inside, “Yes?”
“We’re, um, gonna start movie night now…” you trail off, speaking to the closed door. Your voice is so soft, like you don’t want to be heard by him. “If you wanna—”
The door suddenly swings open, and you meet Aemond’s wide open stare. 
You cannot help but stare back. You still cannot believe this is your best friend’s younger brother. The gangly boy you grew up with. 
Aemond has filled out more, still lean yet definitely defined in all the right places. He chopped off his gorgeously long hair into a cropped haircut for the first time in forever. Although you were initially sad about the haircut, the short hair grew on you. Especially when he styled it to part neatly to the side — he looks so handsome.
When you saw him for the first time in the beginning of the summer, you thought you were dreaming.
His first year away from home was good to him.
“Hey,” you breathe out, offering him a wavering smile.
He takes you in completely, violet eyes washing over you. Every second has you feeling smaller, nervous for his final reaction. Then finally — “Hey.”
An uncomfortable silence falls between the two of you. And you feel so uneasy, you had to turn away from his stare, cocking your head down the stairs. “Um, we should…”
Frowning, Aemond nods. “Right.”
He slips out his room to walk ahead of you, and for some reason your stupid, stupid guilty conscious makes a grab for his arm to stop him on his track.
“Wait, Aemond–” He stiffens under your touch. You press your lips together before asking, “Do you want to talk about what happened first?”
Aemond whips his head to look at you, and you notice the dark circles under his sullen eyes. He looks so sad and you hate yourself because you know you are the reason. 
He shakes his head slowly, prying your hands off him with such gentle care. You’re not sure if he is trying not to hurt you or himself. “No. Let’s just have a good night tonight, alright?”
After a tentative nod, you follow him down the stairs and to the living room, lagging a few steps behind to give him space.
Unfortunately, since the two of you are the last to arrive, the only seat available is beside each other on the couch. But luckily, since Aegon isn’t there yet, there is a comfortable space between the two of you. 
After the second movie is done, Alicent heads to bed first for work in the early morning. Being a widowed mother for eight years already, Alicent has gotten used to being the breadwinner for the family even if now her children are helping support her — with the three oldest already in university with decent paying jobs on the side. She can stop working if she wanted to — Viserys left a big inheritance — but you think she’s just lonely and needs something to occupy her time during the year when the home is empty except for her and Daeron.
Halfway through the third movie, Helaena says her goodnight with a yawn. She hugs you and Aemond, then kisses Daeron’s forehead (which he pretends to be grossed out by), before she heads upstairs to her room.
Before the fourth movie even starts, Daeron’s snores are resounding loud in the room, mouth wide open and asleep on the reclined leather chair. Aemond sits up to throw the blanket that Helaena had abandoned on his little brother and then settles right back down beside you — even though there is another couch now empty for him to sit on.
With Aemond by your side the entire night, you tried not to look at your phone out of respect for him and his feelings. But as it gets later and later, you can’t help but start looking between the television playing the fourth movie, your phone, and the door like clockwork. 
You’re worried. It’s already past midnight and Aegon is still not home. 
You’ve sneakily texted him a couple of times during the first two movies, but he hasn’t answered. 
You open up SnapChat now, knowing that would probably give you an idea on where he might be. 
Of course, the first story you see is of Aegon sticking his tongue down Jeyne Westerling’s throat just 10 minutes ago.
You close off the app with a disgusted grunt, finally deciding it’s time to go.
“I’m gonna head home,” you tell Aemond after an irritated huff. 
“I– alright…”
When you stand up, Aemond does too. He follows you to the front door.
“You can stay the night,” Aemond says before you step into your shoes.
You stand up straight, still no shoes on, to give him a wan smile, “I have my perfectly good bed just next door, Aemond.”
Aemond nods slow, glaring at the ground. Then his gaze flicks up to meet yours, his purple eyes so intense that your mouth parts in a soft gasp. He presses his lips together to wet him with his tongue, and rephrases his previous statement into a question, “Do you want to stay the night… with me?”
Your heart catches in your throat.
“I thought that– Didn’t you—” you draw a slow, deep breath; trying again so you don’t stumble your words anymore, “You said you wanted to stop this.”
“I was drunk when I said that.”
“Drunk words are sober thoughts,” you remind him.
Aemond scoffs, looking off to the side. “Then that saying is clearly false.”
Then his gaze finds yours again, wide and imploring. Don’t make me ask again, his pretty violet eyes say, because you know I will. I always will.
You should say no and go home. 
It’s a terrible idea and you’ll regret it now that you know how much it hurts him when you leave him after.
But your better judgment gets away from you, remembering how Aemond’s body feels against yours. 
“Okay…I’ll stay the night, ” You tell him, slow yet sure. “…With you.”
Aemond lets out a shuddering breath he had been holding, cupping your face to pull you into an unhurried and tender kiss. It’s sweet and chaste. That’s how it always starts.
As quiet as you both can, you slip into his room together, Aemond’s hand holding yours. 
As soon as he locks his door behind him, Aemond’s mouth is on yours again. This time with more heat, stoking a burning flame deep in your loins. His large hands slip under your shirt, grasping tight on your hips. When your mouth parts with a keening mewl, he takes that opportunity to slip his tongue in your mouth, deepening the kiss with a pleasured grunt of his own.
Aemond pulls apart from you, glancing down to unbutton and unzip your jeans with experienced quickness. 
“Off,” he commands between heaving breaths, watching you through dark and hooded eyes as you do exactly what he says. 
When you kick away your jeans, Aemond is already pulling you back to him and pushing your back against the wall, lifting up your right leg around his waist to grind the hard bulging in his pants against your panty covered core. 
You stutter out a moan into his mouth, and he hushes you, catching your bottom lip between his teeth, pulling and nipping until they feel swollen and raw. You damage his the same with every fervent kiss you crush against his mouth. 
Neither of you stop, unable to pull away from the other’s lips or grinding hips. Not even when Aemond slips a hand down and pressed his fingers onto the cotton of your frilly black panty, the pads of his fingers becoming wet and sticky at the contact. 
It has him choking out an airy moan, cursing under his breath. “Seven Hells…  you’re soaked.”
You bite at his shoulder to suppress a whine, bucking into his fingertips as they tease the sensitive button between your thighs. 
“All for me, right, pretty girl?” He huskily murmurs in your ear, his finger rubbing and rubbing until your legs start to shake around him. 
You nod fervently at Aemond’s question, and he rewards you with a smirk, another bruising kiss, and his fingers pulling your panty to the side to trace up and down the folds of your cunt. He spreads your slick with every slow glide, and it has you needy for something more. 
“Aemond, please…”
He lets out a husky chuckle as you feel his fingers teasing at your entrance. You move your hips to try to force it to slip into you, but Aemond pulls away with a playful hum. “Uh-Uh.” 
Your mouth opens to protest, but then Aemond suddenly tucks a finger inside you. It has you keening and whining instead, grasping onto him tightly.
“Good girl,” Aemond praises breathily against your temple. He put another finger in beside the first and starts fucking into you at a moderate pace and occasionally scissoring wide. You wince at the stretch but you love it. His fingers slide slowly in and out of you, deeper each time until they’re all the way down to the knuckles, curling so it hits your sweet spot. Biting down your bottom lip, you stifle a moan as you come undone, dripping onto Aemond’s hand. He groans without stopping the flick of his wrists, keeps you shaking and writhing against him throughout your whole orgasm, “That’s it… That’s a good girl.”
Once you’re spent, Aemond pulls his fingers out of you. He brings it up between you, both noticing how much it gleams, fully covered in your juices. Keeping his gaze in yours, Aemond presses his soaked digits against your bottom lip, which you open without hesitation, darting your tongue out to taste yourself on him. Aemond grunts, sticking his fingers deeper in your mouth. Eyelash fluttering at him, you close your lips around his digits with a hum, sucking and licking until your essence is nearly gone. 
Aemond grins in satisfaction, gaze soft with endearment, and then he is kissing you once more.
“I can’t wait any more,” he tells you, pressing his hard bulge onto you as evidence of that. 
Stumbling onto the bed, Aemond falls over you; his mouth hot on the juncture of your jaw and neck; and his hand spanning wide and grazing up your ribcage, dragging your shirt up with him.
He groans when his thumb brushes across the underside of your breast, finding you bare.
“Knew you weren’t wearing anything underneath, little tease,” he sneers in your ear, biting at the lobe while his fingers twists at a nipple until it pebbles under his touch. “That’s why you came over, right? Wanted me begging for another taste?”
Eyes squeezing shut, you shake your head no. 
That’s not what you wanted. You didn’t come over to hurt him again.
But when Aemond dips down and his warm mouth latches onto the nipple on the side of your chest that his hand was not already groping tenderly, your back arches for him. For more.
And so there might have been a small chance that he is right in his assumptions.
You feel Aemond’s teeth grazing your skin. And when you glance down at him with a whimper, he meets your gaze with mirth and something more feral in his own. Then he is biting down around the well-sucked and hardened nub, teeth marks replacing the one he made there last week that is fading away. 
As your hand threads through his hair, Aemond’s tongue laves across the valley of your breast, tasting salt skin, and then proceeds to do the same to that nipple exactly what he had done to the one before. 
His hand trails down, pushing your underwear aside once more to press his fingers inside again — though this time, it’s slow and his thumb is drawing lazy circles around your clit.
You come for the second time that night like that, from the combination of him fingerfucking you and biting your chest multiple times as if laying his claim on you.
Aemond sits up on his knees to look down at you. 
He admires the sight of you laying under him with your shirt rucked up over your tits, heavily breathing, nipples wet and raw from his mouth, and your cunt dripping for him while your thighs are covered in your mess that he made of you. 
Aemond hunches over, a palm pressed on the mattress just beside your head and his other hand gripping so tightly around your jaw that your mouth falls open.
“You’re such a messy slut ,” Aemond sneers at you, but his tone has a hint of lightness in it, praiseful; and when he spits in your mouth right after, you swallow it down with a contented mewl. There’s a glint of possessiveness in Aemond’s dilated eyes, the violet irises hardly visible anymore.
“ My messy slut,” he all but growls, kissing you again and again and again. 
There is something about the way Aemond kisses you. It is like he is trying to put all his mounting feelings there against your lips, because he knows if he says it aloud, you will just likely run away. 
So you let him. Let Aemond kiss you as though the two of you are lovers. Like this isn’t just a beneficial arrangement between two lonely and desperate people.
When he pulls back, he stares at you for a while, his hand curled at the side of your face while his thumb tenderly grazes along the fullness of your cheek. He licks his lips, as if he is going to say something, but then he stops and shakes his head to himself.
“Come on, get on all fours,” he commands instead, laying a solid smack on your outer thigh to get you moving. You roll over, getting on your elbows and knees while also throwing a playful glare over your shoulder at him, mouthing a reminder that his sister is just in the room next door. 
After rolling his eyes, Aemond pulls his shirt off and throws it carelessly somewhere in his room and pulls his jeans and underwear enough for his hard cock to spring out.
You entice him with a sway of your hips, and what you get in return is a slap over your cunt. It makes you accidentally yelping out loud, but you cut it off by dropping your head forward to bite down on the pillow beneath you. 
“Act like a whore and you get treated like one,” Aemond reminds you, gripping your hips hard enough to leave indents of crescent moons on your skin. You nod in understanding, smearing makeup all over his pillowcase. 
Aemond grabs the fat of your ass, spreading your cheeks apart. It feels so lewd, how you feel him leering at the way both your holes clenches, how you’re absolutely dripping down your legs and onto the cover of his bed.
“The prettiest little pussy in the whole Seven Kingdoms,” Aemond murmurs, so softly as if he had not meant to say it out loud, and yet the compliment sends a thrill down your spine while you whimper for him.
But that does not compare to the noise you make when he gathers up saliva in his mouth, only to slowly dribble it out to drop onto you, letting it drip down the cleft of your ass all the way down through the folds of your pussy. “But it’s so soaked and eager for cock like a slut.”
You can’t help but hum in agreement, pushing back to grind your ass along his length. He lays a wet smack to your ass for that little disobedient act, though before you can arch away, he pulls you towards him, his cock spearing you wide open. In this position, you feel every twitch of the veins on his cock while he reaches so deep inside you. The leaking head of his cock pressing against that sweet spot with every thrust of his hips against your ass. You shut your eyes to focus on the wonderful feeling.
“Gods, you’re so tight and sweet,” Aemond hisses, throwing his head back. The way your cunt squeezes around him is like a chokehold. It’s hard for him to breathe at how amazing it feels, his body moving and his heart racing for more. 
He looks back down again, the sight of the mixture of his precum and your juices frothing around the base of his cock as he slams into you again and again has him groaning.
He grabs onto a fistful of your hair, pulls you up until your back hits his chest. The new position has you sinking down on his cock, writhing and mewling with every inch you take.
“Look up,” Aemond whispers in your ear, and when your eyes finally flutter open, you see the reflection of yourself and Aemond in the mirrored sliding door of his closet. It is quite a sight – your red-rimmed eyes, your tear stained cheeks, the heavy heaving of your arched chest, the hickeys and bite marks all over your body, and the way your glistening cunt is stretched so wide around Aemond’s huge cock. “Gods, you’re gorgeous. And you look so good getting fucked.”
To prove his point, he guides you to ride him with his hands on your hips. 
“Keep your eyes on me, sweetheart,” Aemond orders as he pulls your hair back tighter, fucking up into you when he pushes your hips down. You moan out his name which makes him smirk, his hand covering your mouth to muffle your incoherent and pleasured noises. “Shh… Shh… Shh… If you get any louder, someone’s gonna barge in here and see how you’re such a cockslut for me… So just keep quietly taking my cock like a good little girl, yeah?”
Nodding, you press your lips together in hopes to obey him, not wanting to get punished when you are so close. You watch yourself in the mirror getting fucked so roughly, the heat inside you continuing to build up.
“Fuck, you feel so goddamn good,” Aemond hotly murmurs against the side of your neck, leaving more hickeys there as a reminded of tonight.
You’re greedy. So greedy. 
You love the way Aemond makes you feel.  
He fucks you rough and hard in the way you crave; but with every touch, you feel his adoration for you.
You revel in it. 
Greedy. Greedy. Greedy. 
“Come on, baby, come on my cock — Fuck! You look so good, bouncing on my cock… Can’t wait to fill your tight little cunt… Gonna breed you— yeah? You like that, little slut? Fuck, that’s what I thought…”
Aemond loses it when you nod at his accusation of you wanting him to breed you. He drives into you until your eyes start to roll back, seeing stars.
You made him this way. This is how you slowly coaxed him to take you. When this first started, Aemond was sweet and caring, cooing praises into your ear with every slow thrust of his hips. But as it went on, you asked more of him. A hand squeezing around your neck, a strike rippling your bottom until it’s bruised, had him uttering spiteful and awful names that made you cry —  you don’t know why but that��s how you like it. 
(Perhaps it’s because of the rumors you heard about another Targaryen guy who likes to fuck girls just as roughly.)
At the thought, you come impossibly hard. Your squirt goes everywhere, has Aemond slipping out at how wet it is. He groans in both frustration and satisfaction, pushing back inside you just in time to fill you up to the brim with his cum. He empties inside you, rolling your hips against him until you are too sensitive, whimpering for him to hold on a second. 
Aemond does not care and does not give you a moment to catch your breath, already pushing you back down on the bed and turning you on your side, lifting your leg to hang on his shoulder and guides his already hardened cock back inside you again. Though feeling oversensitive now, you can’t deny how much you want more. Until you can’t think anymore about why your best friend still hasn’t made his way home yet or whose bed he ended up in tonight.
Aemond fucks you until the morning light, has you shaking and quivering and cumming in every new position — on your back, in a mating press, his tongue spreading over you, behind you again… 
It’s because it has been a week since he had you, so really, he is just making up for lost time.
--
You wake up cuddling with Aemond, after only a few hours of sleep. But you feel well rested despite that and the strenuous activities you partook in all night and early morning. 
Humming in content, you nuzzle your face into the nape of Aemond’s neck. Surprisingly, this morning you are the big spoon, your arm and leg thrown over Aemond’s body like a clingy koala.  
Ever the light sleeper, the butterfly kisses you leave on his spine has Aemond stirring, turning his body in a still half-asleep pace to face you. 
“Mornin’,” he drawls huskily, an adorable sleepy grin on his lips. 
“Good morning,” you greet back with a smile, a bit more chirpy and awake. You lean in to give him a sweet peck on his lips, but Aemond pulls you in for something deeper as his hand slides to the nape of your neck in a possessive hold. You mewl as his tongue slips in your mouth and when you feel him thickening up against your thigh.
Gently, you push him onto his back, mouth still on each other with passionate kisses as you climb on top of him. You only part for his lips for a second to grab his hard cock to ease your cunt over it, sliding him inside you with a wet squelch. 
Aemond sighs at the tight clench of your walls around him, languidly kissing you while you roll your hips over him. The sex is slow and sweet, gentler than all the ones the two of you had in the last eight hours.
You cream around him in such a lovely way, softly moaning his name in his ear for only him to hear. That’s all it takes for Aemond to come inside you again.
“I need to pee,” you tell Aemond a couple minutes later, your fingers running gently through his hair while his face is tucked into the crook of your shoulder.
Aemond doesn’t immediately let you free, he even tightens his arms around you. He pulls his head back though, the back of it hitting the wall behind him, just to peer at your pretty face. 
“Just piss on my cock… You’d probably like that,” he says with a teasing smirk.
You shove at him, laughing as you get up from his softened length and off the bed too. “Shut up!”
Once you find your tiny crop top, you put it on. You find your underwear too, but it’s so ruined that you throw it at Aemond instead. He catches it easily, balling it up in his hand and takes a deep inhale, all the while without taking his gaze off you.
Though the sight makes you heat up from head to toe, you wrinkle your nose at him. “Gross.”
Aemond only grins. He knows you well enough — you like depraved shit like that. If you already weren’t so stuffed full of his cum, he’ll probably find you wet again just from his little panty sniffing stunt. 
As you put on your jeans and socks, you and Aemond are making playful conversation.
It’s easy. It’s nice. It feels a little too domestic that it has Aemond thinking this could be a start of something. But he knows he shouldn’t get his hopes up like this.
“— I still can’t believe the Oberyn Martell is actually going to be a professor at your uni next year…”
“You know, it’s never too late to transfer,” Aemond tells you with a frown. The school he is attending now was your dream school all your life, and yet when you got in, you declined the offer – to go to the same school as his brother. “You got in once. You can easily do it again.”
“Yeah, but…” You are standing by his desk, flipping through the brochure detailing the seminars Oberyn Martell, a famous political journalist, will be holding for the rest of the year before his official classes for the next year at Dorne University. You shrug, sending a weak smile his way, “King is pretty good too. I’ve no real complaints except for…”
In the middle of speaking, you trail off, staring out the window as a heavy revving of an old car engine can be heard outside.
Aemond already knows who it is. 
It’s Aegon, pulling up into the driveway in his sleek red 1968 Shelby. But what really gives it away is how your brows knit together as you watch Aegon walk up the pathway, whistling happily without a care in the world, as if he wasn’t out all night making you worried sick.
Aemond is looking at you the same – longingly and sad. Hoping and wishing and praying for you to feel something for him, even just a tiny bit of what you feel for his older brother. 
“I should go,” you tell Aemond with a wan smile after you quickly check yourself in the mirror to fix anything amiss.  
Sighing tiredly, all Aemond can do is nod as he stares down on his lap.
Without another word, you leave him there glancing down at his hands that just touched you all night, memorized every curve of your body, and found all the right places that made you sing in pleasure.
But it’s not enough. It’s never enough.
--
Aemond heads downstairs ten minutes after you left, already hearing laughter coming from the kitchen. The air smells of fresh brewed coffee, bacon, eggs, and waffles. 
He passes by Daeron in the living room. The youngest Targaryen has a plate of all of that beside where he sits on the ground while his focus is on the story-driven zombie apocalyptic video game on the television screen. 
When Aemond arrives at the kitchen, he stands by the arch of the door, leaning on his side against it with his arms crossed in front of him. 
He hates how his heart aches, watching as you laugh so joyfully at a story Aegon is animatedly telling while he pours maple syrup on a plate of waffles that the two of you were sharing . Aemond knows you don’t like things too sweet, and yet you allow Aegon to drown the waffles until they are soggy.  
It’s always like this. You give, Aegon takes. You give up your dream school because Aegon’s fragile ego couldn’t handle being rejected and wants you beside him at all times. You let him treat you like shit because you are so in love with him. 
You’re so enraptured by Aegon’s attention finally on you that you don’t even notice that Aemond has been there for a while. 
Aegon tells a joke that has you laughing so hard, your head tilting back to expose your neckline.
All of the sudden, Aegon stops laughing with you, a frown on his face as his hand reaches out to touch a mark on your neck. “I didn’t know you’re hooking up with someone…”
Clearing your throat, you pull away from his touch, smoothing your hair down to hide the mark. “I’m not.”
Aegon rolls his eyes, “Oh, cause you really gave yourself a hickey… right. So who is it?” He starts to name all the guys the two of you know, and everytime you shake your head and tell him to stop, he just gets even more annoyed and angry. 
Aemond can tell that Aegon is jealous, always so possessive of you even though he doesn’t want you. But you don’t notice, you just think he’s mad cause he thinks you are screwing one of his friends.
“Can you just let it go, Aegon?” You grit out, after telling him once again that no, you are not screwing either of the Cargyll twins.
“I don’t get why you won’t tell me who it is? I tell you about all the girls I hook up with all the time!”
“And you think I want to know?”
“Just– tell me–”
“She said to let it go, Aegon,” Aemond barks out, finally making his presence known. 
Aegon stares between his brother and you, breathing heavily in anger. 
“Whatever. I don’t need this,” Aegon fumes in conclusion, storming out the kitchen door that leads to the backyard, and it slams close behind him.
Chewing at your lip, your gaze is set on the door he just left from.
Aemond takes a tentative step towards you. “Don’t, ___…” You glance towards him, the telltale sign that you are about to burst out crying evident in the hiccupy way you are trying to get air through your parted mouth. Aemond presses his lips together, trying to convince you to stay by how carefully he is approaching you. You deserve to be treated as a first choice. Aemond would always treat you as such. “Stop… Stop always being at his beck and call.”
You seem to think about it. Maybe he can finally get through to you — but then the revving of Aegon’s car is so loud, it snaps you out of it. You frown, eyes watering. “I’m so sorry, Aemond…”
Then you are running out after Aegon like you always seem to be.
And for the third time that summer, you crush Aemond’s heart beyond repair.
--
Summer’s ending, and every single day, Aemond’s wishing for it to just be over.  
Sure he can change his flight back to Sunspear to an earlier one, but he knows his mother would question why and also be incredibly sad about it. Aemond does not have the heart to do that to her. 
He has all his luggage packed already, eager to just book it to the airport as soon as he is able to. 
It’s been too much to bear. He still sees you pretty much every day but he hasn’t talked to you since that morning a week and half ago. 
But of course, you and Aegon have reconciled. Attached to the hips once again. Best friends forever and ever and ever and ever — just like the two of you would often promise each other since you were young. 
Aemond calls it the honeymoon period. When you and Aegon make up after a fight (one that Aegon is usually the cause of and the one that starts it for no reason) and spend every waking minute together for the next few weeks. Aegon will demand for your time whenever he wants it, has you waiting by your phone for his call and canceling plans that he is not a part of. You don’t seem to mind though, as long as Aegon showers you with needy and dependent affections… Until a new girl catches his eyes that has him wagging his tail and tongue hanging out. He then neglects your friendship in pursuit to get in her bed, causing another fight.  
Rinse and repeat. 
The cycle will never end. 
Not unless you end it. Decide that you’ve had enough of Aegon treating you like a convenient option instead of a priority. 
Or more unlikely, for Aegon to finally return your feelings. 
But Aemond highly doubts either of those will ever happen. 
“Hey, are you ready yet?”
Speak of the devil…
Aegon peeks his head inside Aemond’s room. He didn’t even bother to at least knock before he barged in. He takes a look at where Aemond is sitting against the headboard of his bed with a book in his hands — dressed in dark blue jeans, a plain white t-shirt with a black short-sleeved shirt loose and unbuttoned over it. 
“Oh good, you are!” Aegon then opens the door wider. “Actually, can I talk to you about something?”
Aemond huffs in irritation, and before he can even answer, Aegon steps inside like he owns the place, closing the door behind him.
Aegon takes his sweet time – glancing around, picking up things on Aemond’s desk to look at, then putting it back down, flicking at the picture taped on the wall… Finally, he turns to face Aemond and comes out with it, “Do you know who _____ is hooking up with?”
Aemond’s eyes widen slightly but then quickly keeps his expression carefully neutral, not wanting to give anything away. “No. Why would I know?”
Aegon nods slowly, but there’s something about the way his lips purses to the side seems disbelieving.
Aemond clears his throat after standing up from the bed. “Why are you even asking me?” 
Did you tell Aegon something? About you and him?
“I dunno, just asking…” Aegon shrugs, mouth pulled down in an exaggerated frown. “…You two have been spending a lot of time together lately, so I just thought you would know.”
With narrowed eyes, Aemond reminds him, “The only reason we’ve been spending a lot of time together is because you’re always ditching her for other girls.” 
Aegon licks his lips and then grins uncomfortably at how his younger brother just called him out. “I see that now… I think it’s because I—“ Aegon stops mid sentence and sniffs noisily, rubbing his hand over his mouth as he starts to pace a bit. 
Aemond is quick to pick up on his brother’s odd behaviour and eyes him quizzically. 
Then Aegon stops and looks directly into Aemond’s eyes — an expression of open vulnerability sets on Aegon’s features that Aemond feels his stomach drop. 
Oh fuck no… Don’t you fucking dare say it, Aemond thinks with a slight shake of his head. 
“I think I like her, Aemond,” Aegon confesses, eyes wide and watery. “I think I’m gonna tell her tonight.”
At his sides, Aemond clenches his fists, his nails biting into his palms enough to hurt. But his expression remains unbothered, apathetic even. 
“Why are you telling me as if I care what you do with your life?”
Aegon chuckles with a roll of his eyes. “ Please, I’m not a complete idiot…” He is grinning as he takes a step closer to Aemond. “I know you’re in love with her…” Aemond cringes at the truth being said so loud in his otherwise quiet room. “…and you have been ever since we were young.”
Aemond’s glare on Aegon is heated. 
So Aegon knew, and yet he always held your loyalty and preference to him over Aemond’s head.
With another step forward, Aegon is right in front of Aemond. The younger Targaryen’s nostrils flare, trying to keep his anger in check with his steady breathing. 
“And I’m not cruel, Mondy…” Aegon says, and yet he is looking up at him with a taunting smirk. “I care about you, so I just wanted to give you a heads up.”
Then, just as he is about to turn and leave Aemond’s room, he clamps a hand on his younger brother’s shoulder, fingers digging in as he sneers into Aemond’s ear, “And just so you know… I intended to replace every filthy mark you’ve stained on her body with my own.”
Aegon’s smirk then turns to a playful smile as he lightly smacks Aemond’s cheek twice. “Mum wants to leave soon to get a good spot at the beach, so hurry up, yeah?”
Once again alone in his room, Aemond lets out the ragged breath he had not known he was even holding. He takes a seat on the edge of his bed, pressing the heels of his palms against his forehead enough to hurt — but it's still not as bad as the squeezing of his heart.
--
It is a Targaryen family tradition to celebrate the annual summer festival that marks the end of summer at Blackwater Bay beach. But obviously with what Aegon has planned to do tonight, Aemond would rather be anywhere but there. 
When Alicent’s mini Cooper pulls into the parking lot of the beach, Aemond guesses it’s a little too late to back out. He steps out of the car, just as a red Shelby parks just right beside them. 
Aegon exits his car, sunglasses on even though it’s already pretty dark outside. You’re not with him, Aemond notes, only the Cargyll twins follow after Aegon. You must be coming here with Alys and them.
Aemond helps Alicent grab the coolers from the back of the Cooper along with Daeron, letting Helaena take the lead to a perfect grassy area to watch the fireworks from. Aemond doesn’t stick around, deciding to walk the boardwalk that trails along the beach.
That is when Aemond catches sight of you, in a pretty white linen summer dress and your toes already in the sand. You are laughing with Alys and Rhaena, a lit up sparkler in your hand.
So pretty, like a shining star.
So close, yet so out of reach.
Just when he is about to step onto the white sand to make his way to you, someone bumps harshly past his shoulder. 
With a scowl, Aemond watches on in bitter jealousy as Aegon runs to you, feet on the sand and an unlit sparkler in his hand. He captures your attention with a call of your name, and you look back at him, smiling so beautifully — a smile solely reserved for Aegon. It has your girlfriends giggling, skipping away arm in arm to give the two of you some time alone together.
With a nod, you press the tip of your sparkling sparkler to light his.
As soon as it does, Aegon leans close, murmuring something in your ear. When he pulls back, your eyes are wide, a mixture between guarded and hopeful.
In the dark, Aemond can barely read your lips,
You do?
Aegon nods. 
Then his lips are on yours just as fireworks light up the night sky in brilliant arrays of colors and patterns. 
It’s a picture perfect scene. One that could be in the movies when the leading hero finally gets the girl.
And as always, Aemond is left way far down on the list of credits in the story of Aegon’s life. 
All through his life, Aemond got used to it; toiling for the things that Aegon is freely given. 
When Aegon got his father’s beloved car when he passed away, Aemond didn’t care.
When Aemond got into the best school in the whole Seven Kingdoms and yet the fanfare wasn’t nearly as huge as when Aegon got into King’s Landing U, Aemond also didn’t care.
But even if he had anticipated it happening again – he didn’t think it would hurt this much.
Because it’s you . You are the one thing that Aemond wanted so badly for himself. He has been in love with you all his life and would have done anything for you, if you’d only let him.
Aemond chuckles bitterly, tearing his gaze away from you and Aegon, still locking lips.
Now you’re just another prize that Aegon has won without merit. 
And Aemond? 
He is the fool who stupidly got his hopes up — because all along, you were never even his to lose.
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Note
Hi..do you accept request?
If you do could you make Xiao is the father of creator child?
Thank you
The creator had a:
Birdly child
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WC: ~700
I'm in love with how two asks came at the same time about Xiao, it's time to give the emo baby some love
I remember reading hatchlings often have rough feathers and aren't as photogenic as grown ups until the first feathers fall off.
“Bright yellow eyes aren't all that uncommon too” furina looks over your shoulder as you nurse your daughter, she would say she looks surprisingly unremarkable if that didn't sound like an insult of sorts even if it was true, dark blue hair and striking yellow eyes but nothing much. For one minute she hoped she would come out with long blue streaks and sharp angled ears, even if only so she could tease Neuvillette about his meeting with you.
“I’m happy enough that her face is similar to their grace” the tsaritsa sits beside you, a tea cup between her hands, as bitter as she seemed to whoever she expected was your lover her confirmation to the baby shower was the first to arrive, a few plushies and older baby clothes.
Zhongli stands just behind furina, watching her face as you burp Xuezhui, the little lift at the end of her eyes making them slightly sharper than they are, reminding him of a certain someone. Snow and bird, Aren't you a bit too on the nose? Oh, well, at least his dear apprentice and friend found some happiness. 
His gold eyes look at furina, a soft smile forming “I think she looks so cute, like a finch hatchling” his hand getting close to her and lightly brushing her rough hair with one finger, such a tiny baby.
“I never said she isn't!”
“Did you want to see me, Morax?” Xiao appears beside zhongli, Xuezhui was getting fuzzy and you decided to put the baby to sleep before returning to the archons, during that time they divided to do as they pleased, and by the steaming teapot Xiao could guess he decided to enjoy some tea 
“Take a seat”
“Is anything wrong?”
“I see you truly took it to heart to protect their grace, even spent the night in their room to be sure” zhongli swirls the golden tea inside the cup. The noise of the slight splashing drowned by the noise of him choking on his spit.
“My apologies, Rex Lapis, it wasn't meant to-” quickly he bows, his forehead touching the table but zhongli cuts him with a small smirk.
“when two finches love each other very much they spend the night together and-” 
“I'm already repenting, please…”
The night is warm and clear, the crescent moon on full display and your baby isn't in her crib yet you aren't truly worried after walking to the balcony and seeing a figure seated on the edge of the nursery's roof.
Xiao holds his daughter to his chest while trying to manage the wild mane of blueish hair she has, the exact same he had as a kid but chose to cut. Now, to some extent he wishes he listened to guizhong when she spoke of hairstyling. 
For now he settles with two pigtails on either side of her head, one lower than the other but his daughter was starting to wriggle around and start pushing her head against his neck, wanting to return to her crib and sleep. 
“Is she looking at me?” Arlecchino asks as she feels a gaze burning on her neck, usually if it was one of her children she would tell them off for being so obvious but for it to be a rather spoilt toddler who isn't training to be a spy she couldn't say much.
“Ah, apologies about it, she is going through a phase of watching everyone” there is your kid, her hair on two braids and her yellow eyes watching owlishly.
“You know, if you lent her to me I could train her, she seems to be a natural” she teases you.
“Oh, don't even worry” as you return to the conversation without paying her too much mind you can still see her unblinking amber eyes from the door.
“Stop crawling over your crib’s railing, you are going to hurt yourself!” You scold your toddler, one leg and an arm over the railing attempting to escape nap time “go to sleep, you are in a bad mood if you don't nap”
she mumbles something you guess was her saying she wanted to play or crawl around but you don't follow her game.
“I don't care! To bed, young missy or your little night scrolls with your dad are done!” she huffs and sits down her back facing you.
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chlorinecake · 3 days
Text
𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐏’𝐒 𝐆𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐄𝐍 𝟒 — a yang jungwon fanfic
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𖤣 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: after betraying his trust, yandere!yang jungwon tries his best to maintain a forgiving heart towards you, but things only take a turn for the worse when you foolishly refuse his rules again…
𖥧 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: mild-nudity, insinuated food poisoning, abduction themes, suggestive (mentions of self/pleasure and cnc themes), swearing, violence, slow burn, crying, angst
𖡼 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 3.8k ~ Previously ⊱✿⊰
✎ note: In no way does this fanfic intend to romanticize unhealthy relationships or abusive behaviors. I write purely for entertainment and creative purposes. Reader discretion is advised
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TWO DAYS HAD passed since Jungwon first confronted you about sneaking out to the greenhouse while he was away at work.
You’re certain your heart nearly pumped out of your chest once those ominous words escaped his mouth, sending a valley of chills down your spine.
Tracing back the steps you took in your mind, you’re not entirely sure how Jungwon even found out about your little adventure anyways…
Still, your soul contented itself to some degree in the simple fact that he hadn’t asked you anything about what you saw in his greenhouse…
Or better yet, what you weren’t supposed to see.
The only time you saw Jungwon in between those days were whenever he brewed you a cup of tea in the morning, or came back home from work to prepare your supper.
A suspicious inkling in your heart remained concerning his reasons for wanting you to drink the mysterious herbal concoction so routinely.
Out of paranoia, you would instead pour the shimmery liquid into the ivy plant on your nightside table, hoping that he’d never find out about it…
At the end of the day, you really did want to trust Jungwon… not that he deserved it or anything… you just felt that trusting him was the very least you could do in return.
…Especially ever since he vowed to never hurt or touch you against your will again…
“I’m sorry,” your voice began at a whisper, somehow sounding loud in the quiet of Jungwon’s presence.
You were currently in the kitchen with him, sitting at the round wooden table while he prepared you a bowl of fresh fruit from his garden.
He turned to look at you over his shoulder, eyes barely visible through his shaggy bangs as his grip around the bowl tightened slightly.
“Sorry for what?,” he asked, not sure as to why you were apologizing.
Did you do something bad without him knowing?
Did you somehow manage to go against his rules right under his nose again?
You could tell from the sudden feeling of tension in the room that Jungwon’s mind started to wander in dark places, so you knew you had to speak fast.
“M-my little incident with the greenhouse… I hope you find in your heart t-to forgive my curiosity…” you stuttered nervously, picking with your nails in your lap.
He remained quiet, breathing pattern still like a wind chime frozen in time as he turned on his heel, eyes still not meeting yours.
You watched as he reached for a spoon to drizzle honey on your breakfast, “Would you like any yogurt or granola with your fruit, love?”
You couldn’t believe he just asked you that, of all things—
“Jungwon, I’m trying to apologize here…”
“I know,” he hummed sarcastically, “and I’m trying to prepare your breakfast…”
“I… I know…,” you repeated with a sigh, hanging your head low now as the tension only grew thicker, “thank you, Jungwon… just the fruit and honey is fine…”
He was pleased with your obedience to his subtle cues, bringing the bowl to you with a silver spoon perched in its side, “You're welcome…”
And with that, the stale morning continued as usual, you and Jungwon barely exchanging any small talk as the nearby sun rose to its fullest extent.
He never explicitly said that he forgave you for sneaking out into the greenhouse that day, but it elated him nonetheless that you took a small step to compliance.
About another hour had passed after you both finished breakfast together before Jungwon received a call from his boss, saying that he could have the day off because of a blackout in the city.
That meant you and him would be spending the entire day together, an occurrence that rarely even happened on the weekends given his busy work life.
Jungwon was always busy, so he claimed… which only made you question how he was able to stalk you all those months before abducting you.
You quite seriously couldn’t believe a single word that escaped his serpentine mouth—
“I want to show you a creative piece I've been working on in my greenhouse for you,” he began with gentle enthusiasm as you two spent some time rearranging the bedroom.
Or more accurately, while you sat on the bed, watching him add three extra locks to your bedroom door.
You didn’t respond yet as you didn’t know what to say, so he busied himself with neatly putting away his work tools before standing up from the ground to meet you.
“I hope you don't mind that I kept the dress you wore on your first day here,” he continued bashfully, “I used it to come up with your measurements for the dress.”
He also used it to please himself in eery hours of the night while he thought of a whiny you squirming beneath him, but he'd rather keep that part private for now...
His freshly calloused hand found yours as he joined the spot beside you on the mattress, pulling you back into the moment with a pleasant expression on his angelic features.
It was a shame how someone so demented could be so beautiful.
“What's wrong, my love? Did you spoil the surprise for yourself that day you went snooping around without my permission?” Jungwon interrogated frantically, worried that the blank expression on your face had something to do with his mentioning of the dress.
And it did, but not for reasons he assumed.
“God, you saw it already, didn't you? Please don't hate me ____, I know it didn't look like much at the time, but—”
“Jungwon—”
“I made a few finishing touches since then, but it looks way better now, I promise... I'm so sorry for not hiding the surprise from you better—”
“Wonie,” you said a little louder this time, making his guilt-stricken eyes soften slightly at your use of a nickname.
He let out a sigh, shaking his head with a light-hearted chuckle before running a hand through his thick brown locks, “Guess I kinda rambled a bit there, didn't I?”
“Just a little,” you agreed, patting him on the back as he rested his elbows on his thighs while sitting.
If only you could feel the way his crooked heart fluttered at your simple initiation of physical touch.
“And I didn't see your project in the greenhouse, by the way... only a naked mannequin and some plants… so please, don’t stress yourself out over that,” you reassured in a soft tone, almost as if cooing to the hurt child inside him…
“I appreciate everything you do for me, Jungwon… you know that…,” you confessed in the stillness, an odd sincerity behind each word.
“Thank you for saying that, my love... but as a committed pair, my duty is to please you, and that's all I could ever aspire to do so long as you keep pleasing me...” his voice trailed off ominously, your eyes watching as little sighs kept leaving his body…
It was a strange thing, really...
Seeing such an intimidating person falter to reverence… insecurity.
You wondered in your mind exactly what Jungwon meant by you pleasing him, but you decided to keep quiet for the meantime instead of asking.
Suddenly, he lifted himself from the bed, turning to face you with a seemingly restored countenance as he spoke, “I can't wait for you to try on the dress though, ____... I just know you'll look absolutely divine once its on you... Ready?”
“Ready,” you smiled, taking his extended hand in yours as he guided you out of the bedroom and to his forbidden greenhouse.
YOUR BODY STIFFENED as stone, your lungs hardly remembering to breathe as Jungwon’s cold hands stripped you of your clothing layer by layer.
You stood in front of him, now only in a washed-out pair of lace panties and thin bralette, a wooden stepping stool placed beneath your feet which strangely resembled a pedestal.
The sound of metal clothes hangers sliding into each other hit your ears as he rummaged through the wardrobe in between one of his gardening shelves.
Meanwhile, your eyes scanned the room before inevitably falling back onto the sight of two mannequins, one whole and another headless.
From the looks of it, you almost couldn’t believe that Jungwon had designed either of the pieces himself, let alone crafted them by hand.
Despite how Jungwon had proved to you multiple times that he was a jack of all trades, his array of skills never seeming to fail.
The red dress you watched him carefully remove from the mannequin was the one that belonged to you.
It’s neckline was made up of fancy lace, dried out field flowers trailing the accented seams.
The waist of the dress was decorated similarly, an array of gorgeous flowers with warm hues floating idly atop the skirt of feathery fabric, ballon-like sleeves completing the look with a mocked neckline.
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The piece, in short, was lovely, Jungwon having brought with him a pair of silk white leggings and sliding them up your dainty ankles as would a servant before his queen.
It was evident all over his face that he took such delight in dressing you, hands respectfully adjusting your undergarments and fastening the makeshift zipper up your spine.
With delicate hands, he straightened out the fabric over your shoulders and down your waist as needed before stepping back to get a full look at you.
“My precious blossom...” he began adoringly, observing how the thin material draped over every ethereal curve of your body, and how the coloring palette complimented your natural one as if it were the only dress you were ever meant to wear.
"You're glowing," he almost whispered this time, voice so light that it tickled you when it touched your skin.
“Thank you,” you replied with a similarly gentle tone, not quite sure on how to respond to his enamor for you.
Pacing back towards you, he took your hands in his, looking almost as if he was holding back tears once his feline eyes met yours, “What do you think, my love? Did I do a just job for you?…”
“It’s perfect,” you smiled, abandoning one of his hands so you could swipe the moisture from his eyes, watching as he nearly purred at your action, “I love it…”
“And I’m so happy you do,” he replied, gentle touch grazing your wrist as he continued to admire the view of you in his unique piece.
“I have a question, though,” you started shyly, still watching his face in case there’d be an unpredictable change of emotion.
He simply nodded, feelings as though he was in a sleep-like state from how lovesick he felt right now, “You may continue, my love…”
“Okay,” you went on, swallowing any nerves building up in your throat before speaking, “What compelled you to design such a dress for me in the first place?”
A prolonged silence meddled between you two at the question up until he giggled slightly to himself, confusion washing over you at the sight of his now full-smile.
“Has it really been that long, love,” Jungwon asked in a half-serious tone, “for you to not even remember anymore?”
“Remember what?” You asked back, using the most polite voice you could muster.
“Remember that you’re my little flower, silly,” he smiled eerily, pinching one of your cheeks in a way that triggered a fear response within you.
Fortunately though, you did a good job of concealing it this time…
I’m not a flower, Jungwon, a voice similar to your own weakly choked out in desperation, trying to trigger a memory.
“I…. I’m not sure I fully understand,” you admitted, not even aware of how your legs stiffened, or the way your heart started to pulse as if you’d just been in a fight.
“Your rebuttal,” he clarified, “in the woods that day… it rang true to my ears,” he said, still tracing your skin with his touch.
“Jungwon—”
“Let me finish… please,” he interrupted sternly before tilting his head at you. “You brought something very important to my attention that day… and it was that every flower ought to have petals…”
He stopped in his words, hoping that you would understand, and to some degree, you did.
All of this, from day one… was to make sure that you, as his flower, blossomed accordingly…
The tea he ‘watered’ you with every morning…
The rays of sunlight he valued synonymously with any other form of nutrition you received…
The dress he designed for you with his own hands…
And the initial nickname he graced you with since as long as you could forget…
Jungwon loved you from the depths of his stony heart, and he had a very strange way of expressing it to you at times.
Though, now that you were complete with a set of more petals than he could possibly count, the last step was for Jungwon to make sure he took good care of you so you wouldn’t wither away…
So you wouldn’t have to perish like the last girl did…
THAT EVENING, JUNGWON brought you back to the garden just outside the main cabin on the land lot.
You sat quaintly, hands folded in your lap as he toiled in the flower bed, the knees of his dark blue jeans turning dark with moist soil.
"You look rather bored," he started, a glint of playfulness in his eyes, "care to give me a hand?"
"Sure," you replied apprehensively, getting up from the wooden bench you sat at and joining him at the seedling patch.
"See that shovel over there," he asked, directing your attention to its auburn handle a few feet away from you, "use it to sprinkle a bit of fertilizer over these here flowers, please."
"Okay," you obliged, a little grunt escaping you as you reached forward to grab the shovel, Jungwon's eyes trying their best not to follow the curve of your outstretched figure, the sounds you made doing enough to tingle his imagination.
"Is everything alright? You look warm," you said, observing the slight hue rushing to the apple of his cheeks.
"Oh- No, I'm alright," he said with a reassuring smile, reaching in his side pocket to pull out a pair of gardening scissors.
You busied yourself with sprinkling the flower bed with fertilizer, meanwhile, the distant sound of Jungwon snipping a few plants filled your ears alongside the peaceful melody of songbirds.
Your mind couldn't help but think of the day he made you kill one of their kind... the day he made you steal another creatures freedom, just as he had done to you-
"What're you picking?" You asked, not meeting his eyes as you dusted a bit of dirt from your hands.
"Just some herbs for your tea," he answered in a quiet voice, focusing most of his mind on the task at hand, "the ones in my greenhouse withered out somehow, but I'm glad I had a few back-up plants out here..."
Your eyes followed as he continued to snip, colorful leaf and flower bud remnants falling into the mini mortar bowl he held in his free hand.
"Do you recognize all the plants you farm by name?"
"Pfft... of course I do," he chuckled, "I've been a man of the garden my whole life," he added. "These purple ones here are called valerian, the vibrant ones passion flowers, and the red ones are poppy's... though, I often mix these with berry brews in your tea..."
You took a mental note of the names he listed, "And do you have a botanical book by any chance-"
"You're asking a lot of questions again, love," he said, voice sounding a bit cold even though his face remained just as friendly.
"S-sorry," you apologized timidly, hanging your head low as the evening wind picked up, blowing sprinkles of wildlife into the air as Jungwon turned his head to avoid getting anything in his eyes.
"Let's head back inside now," he said softly, "it's getting late."
You got up from the ground, holding your day-dress at either side of you as if it already hadn't been soiled from the soggy flower bed, Jungwon guiding you back to the cabin with a protective hand around your waist as the wind continued to beat at your backs.
Promptly upon being met with the warmth of the main cabin, Jungwon locked the door behind you two before making his way to the kitchen where he set a kettle on the stovetop.
Meanwhile, he had ran you a bath so you could get washed up in the nearby restroom down the hallway, cleaning yourself with haste and changing into a fresh pair of clothes.
The tea kettle was whistling angrily in a matter of minutes, Jungwon having crushed the collection of herbs and berries with the pestle in his bowl and pouring the scalding water right over it.
With a skilled hand, he drizzled a bit of honey at the bottom of your teacup, transferring the brew right over.
Clink... clink... clink.
Jungwon gave the mixture a few stirs with a metal spoon before deciding to himself that it was ready.
"____," he called after you from your bedroom in a sing-songy voice, waiting for a now-refreshed you to meet him on the mattress.
The feline eyed boy held the warm cup tenderly in his grasp just as you returned with a damp head of hair and natural glow.
"It's time for your tea, love," he reiterated, scooting over on the bed as you didn't hesitate to join the spot beside him.
He opened your hands before placing the cup within your grasp.
There was something about the expression on his face in this moment... a knowing look displayed on his cat-like features as he eyed you fiercely, waiting for you to take the first sip.
"I added a new ingredient to it this time, too," he went on, breaking the odd silence, "not that you'd even notice a difference in the taste since you never drink it despite my instructions to."
Your heart nearly rolled from your chest and onto the prickly wooden floor at his sudden words.
"W-wha... what did you say," you stuttered nervously, tightening your grip around the teacup.
"Oh, please... you didn't think I'd catch on to the ivy's pot and soil being over-soaked so frequently?" He challenged, shaking his head at you in disappointment that you even thought you could get away with lying to him.
Again.
"The poor thing almost died because of you," he continued, taking in your anxious body language even though your eyes failed to meet his daunting ones.
"I... I don't know what to say," you admitted with a shaky voice, knowing that with Jungwon, it was better to say something, even if it was stupid, instead of saying nothing at all.
He hummed at your reply before speaking again, "So I'll ask you a question instead... how come you never drink it? I mean... you're not a picky eater, so there must be some other reason... isn't there?"
You let out a hesitant breath, "Jungwon, I don't know what you want to hear, but-"
"I don't want to hear anything but the truth, ____," he clarified with an exhausted huff, keeping his eyes on you as if pleading.
"Now don't keep me waiting with your nonsense because you already know how I get when you do that to me..."
“I…I just,” you stumbled over your speech, struggling to maintain eye contact with him as his gaze practically pierced you.
“You don’t trust me,” he finished for you, shaking his head at your failure to even deny it. “You genuinely think that I’d do something bad to you,” he scoffed while clenching his jaw, “even after that pathetic little promise I made to you…”
That’s when you felt the cup harshly leave your grasp, a bit of its liquid spilling onto your lap as he abruptly stood up from the mattress.
A scornful look took over his delicate features, throwing his head back before drinking the tea in one big gulp, wiping the remaining residue from the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand, “There… you see?! Not that hard, right love?”
You meant to respond but he already paced out of the room by now, coming back in less than a minute with the kettle in his hand, refilling the teacup he’d just drank from.
Smiling facetiously at your nervous frame, Jungwon pushed your legs open with his own, now standing dauntingly between them.
You were still sat on the bed, legs trembling at either side of his thighs as his broad shadow nearly consumed your lesser one, eyes rising to meet his nightmarish face thanks to his hand guiding your chin upward.
You didn't like this one bit, the cold air of the room hitting your core now that your legs were spread open, nor his body being positioned right between you.
He tilted his head, your eyes brimming with fearful tears that every bone in your body tried to push down with the growing lump in your throat that you couldn't swallow.
“So do it then,” he went on sternly, voice not raised but just as impactful, “Take the fucking cup and drink it.”
There was a certain beast imbedded behind Jungwon's contrastingly angelic face... it was always hungry, waiting for whatever enticing peep-hole of a chance was provided for him to squeeze through.
And as perverted as it sounds, that same hole of temptation laid right within you, hidden behind a dainty nightgown that acted as wrapping paper to a precious gift.
With every day that passed, Jungwon could feel himself crawling despairingly closer and closer to its rim, praying that he might someday spill over the edge and be basked in all its glory...
The very glory he placed on your purity since day one, seeking after it as if it'd rescue his corrupted soul.
You had no other choice but to heed to his words, parting your lips with a broken whine as his grip on your face tightened.
He refused to bring the cup to your lips, watching as if entertained once you lifted the cup over his hand, letting the tea meet your dry tongue.
“Swallow it,” he ordered, looking into your eyes before the feeling of warmth hit your stomach almost instantly, the teacup now being empty.
“Wonie,” you choked out, a single tear gliding down the supple curve of your cheek as his free hand set the cup on the nightstand, only to find your lips and toy a thumb at it.
“What is it love?” He whispered in a hoarse voice, peering impossibly close to your face as his grip remained tight.
“I’d like to go to bed now,” you yelped weakly, lips twitching with fear that only continued to multiply within you now that he'd pushed your back against the mattress, caging you beneath him.
“And without supper?” He taunted, whispering these words right under your ear as your hands trembled at his chest.
“Yes,” you blurted out with heavy breaths, “I’m no longer hungry, Jungwon…”
He let your words sink in, taking in just how scared you seemed when he hadn't even done anything yet.
The way you feared Jungwon used to bother him, but now he started to see an advantage in it... an advantage in the way you crumbled into submission before him.
“Very well then,” he said, hands finally leaving your chin with a few red marks still remaining on your skin from the pressure, “sleep well, my love...”
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☆ Thank you all so much for reading this piece! I always love how interactive you guys are in the comments with this story and it truly brings a smile to my face !! On a side note though, this part turned out much longer than expected, so apologies for the cliffhanger ;-; ... to be continued hehe ;)
☆ taglist:  @squoxle @ashgonedash @yourmomscuntis2tighy @kaykay11sworld @gigiramirezsblog @hoonsyo @en-thralled  @night-en-shining-armor @cutiejseong @j-wyoung @nikisvanillaccola @bambangan @wonbyf @4imhry @zhangyi-johee  @valhrts @lisaaannna @lovelycassy @addictedtohobi @gardenwons @nikipedia07 @tubatusoobs  @clarisabutterfliescupcake @yevene @heecries @rosiemiayyxy @jungwonieee @edgykoo @luvmlkw @idkhoomanmaybe @sunsinmyskies @guessm0del @ayadikreino @destairea @jakehooni @jjungwonss @nikilvr @jays-property @moonchus @angelicjungwon @wonniesdoll @rosiemiayyxy @rinirumi @noviadebeomgyu @pochacco-o @hapeynaaa @ikngh @maspire @mamuljji @hnnhj @legendarycowboywinnerlawyer @enhypenlovre @stxrboyjae @f4irynono @03sunoos @itwasrem @laurradoesloveu @lalalalovelalalasworld @honestimage @ro-0327 @stwberrykooki @heelvrr @wonbinisbabygurl @jungwonloveer @jungwonsmybf @kayoiw @lovelycassy @mrswolfhard3 @theothernads @junieshohoho @wonheartz @jongsbie @candewlsy @kotazuken @moonchus @laurradoesloveu @millieinyourarea @straightondryland
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lieslab · 3 days
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The cut that always bleeds
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꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎ ꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎ ꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎
Pairing: Hyunjin X gn reader
Summary: After struggling with the past, you walk out of a date and ghost Hyunjin until he shows up at your place trying to figure out what went wrong.
Genre: Comfort/hurt
Word Count: 3.2K
Trigger warning: Mommy issues, depression, self-hatred, and insecurities.
A/N: To whoever requested this, I'm so sorry. I wanted to post this yesterday and then my internet crashed after I came home from work. It was awful, but anyway, I have all of this finished. It's here in all it's glory and I know you wanted comfort. Most of it isn't until the end, but it's here. Enjoy <3
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Grief is such a funny thing. They say you can go your entire life running from it until it finds you in the middle of a sunny afternoon. Sometimes it looms overhead in the weaning hours of a dark and dreary night. Sometimes it finds you in the most unexpected places and at the most unexpected times. 
Your grief fell into your lap in the middle of a romantic evening with your boyfriend. Hyunjin sat across from you, sawing through his medium rare steak. The inside was still a light pink, not yet cooked to a well roasted brown. Oozing with a reddened myoglobin, your stomach churned at the sight of it. 
Your own piece of steak caught in your throat. You forced yourself to swallow and took your eyes away from him. Your once longing appetite slipped away from you. You placed your silverware back along your plate. 
“Mommy, I can’t get it!” 
“Can’t get what?” 
“It won’t cut!” 
The shrill voice of a child caught your attention. You glanced over to find a young girl with her mom sitting at the table across from yours. The mother was all dressed up in a black dress. The young girl was in similar attire with her jet black hair hanging down her back in a long braid. She couldn’t have been much older than ten. 
You watched in silence as the mother leaned over and began to show the young girl how to cut the steak. You weren’t aware of the tears pooling in your eyes until Hyunjin called your name. You glanced back over at him and took him in. 
His eyes were narrowed in confusion. There was a faint wrinkle between his eyebrows as his eyes went back and forth between you and the mother and child beside you. He didn’t know what was wrong, but he hated the sight of you crying. 
“What’s wrong? Are you okay?” He reached out a hand to grab yours, but you tugged your hand out of his reach. A wave of hurt flickered in his eyes. 
You forced yourself up on unsteady feet and slipped the wooden chair behind you back. The two of you came to a steakhouse just for a nice change of scenery. Hyunjin had a knack for being romantic. He liked to spoil you with fancy things now and then. 
In your opinion, this place was too fancy for someone like you. Waiters and waitresses served food from metal platters with lids. It was a form of luxury that you had only seen in the movies. The steakhouse was dripping with wealth. 
It was in the way the customers and how they dressed. The clicking of expensive stiletto heels from women and the three piece suits from some of the men. Your nicest shirt and dress pants were nothing like what everyone else was wearing. In your head, you stuck out like a sore thumb. 
“Wait, where are you going?” 
“The bathroom,” you mumbled. 
You stepped away from the table and pushed your chair in. Dazzling bright lights hung overhead and had been dimmed down. Knives and forks scraped along pearl white porcelain plates. 
The further to the back of the restaurant you walked, the more you saw things that you didn’t want to see. Couples sharing dates and plethoras of smaller groups. Wine glasses clinked and the wealth in the air made you feel faint. 
Your mother was someone you hadn’t thought about in quite a while. You tried to outrun the thoughts of the past, but it has a nasty habit of catching up. You were nothing, but a victim of your past. It kept you nailed down to a cross that you couldn’t quite escape. 
The situation began to overstimulate you. The silverware against plates were like nails on a chalkboard. The voices enhanced and became louder. It was all too much and it was suffocating. Your lungs felt restricted and you couldn’t breathe. 
You reached the bathroom and shoved the door open. You swallow mouthfuls of lemon-filled air. The tiled checkered floor was spotless. The mirror, running across the sink, remained free of fingerprints and water droplets. 
This date was a disaster, but it wasn’t Hyunjin’s fault. In the dining area, he sat at the table with the ghost of your presence. The scent of your body spray still lingered. He slowly sipped his red wine with a frown. Your steak had barely been touched and you might have taken one sip from your wine. Whatever you were struggling with, he didn’t understand it. 
He wanted to, but you had a tendency to keep things to yourself. If you kept your problems to yourself, only you had to wear the shackles of life. You didn’t have to chain anyone up with your problems either. You weren’t adding to the weight of the world on their shoulders. This was how you kept yourself safe and how you kept others from leaving. 
There was rot in your heart and you knew it. You have known it since you were a child. Maybe you were born with it or maybe it was something that had wormed its way inside you and burrowed through your body. Gnawing through organs, riding the circular waves of blood, and seeping into your marrow. 
Your mother was sure to never let you forget who you were. You were a maggot, a parasite, the worst of the worst; the lowest form of life that took others for granted. You were a mistake, a lost cause, and nothing, but the dirt on the underside of her shoe.
Nothing you could do would ever make her happy. You could beg for forgiveness on your knees. You could give her thousands of dollars. You could promise to do better, but it’d never work. Your mother’s mind had been set in stone since you were a child. Your whole life, you faced nothing, but her wrath. 
She was cruel and she knew it. Every word spat your way was another invisible slap in your face. You could rip out your heart and your own mother would thank you. She’d crush it and watch the life drain from your eyes. She wouldn’t mourn her child, she’d relish in your death. 
Your eyes began to well up faster and you brushed away the tears. Your fingers gripped the sturdy edge of the sink. You forced yourself to breathe through the urge to sob. You jerked your head back to face the ceiling and sucked in deep breaths, but it didn’t help. 
Growing up without a stable mother was difficult. Everyone deserves a parental figure. Everyone deserves maternal love. The delicacy and sweetness, the cooing and the coddling, the comfort and the sense of safety. 
Maybe you really had been cursed since birth. That right had been ripped away from you and you were left with nothing, but an ache. You could try to patch the superficial wound, but sometimes cuts need stitches. There was nothing there for you to stitch up the gaping hole. It was wide open and infected; oozing with a longing for a mother that’d never be filled. 
You could try to fill it with parasocial relationships. You could distract yourself with social media. You could read a thousand books and watch movie after movie, but the truth is that there will always be a bit of an ache. 
It will occur in moments when it’s not supposed to. It’s hard to heal from something that you never had properly to begin with. Parental love is something that’s irreplaceable. Don’t we all just want a little love? 
When the door flung open and another person entered, you jerked your body up straight. You sucked in a final breath, wiped away your tears, and you hurried out of the bathroom. You didn’t give the other person time to ask if you were alright. You ducked out of the heavy wooden door and took off. 
Weaving through the tables, you found Hyunjin with his back turned to you. The flap of butterfly wings brushed against your stomach before your stomach acid dissolved them. You pushed that giddiness away and forced your feet to move. 
He was sipping his wine when you approached. He paused mid-sip and glanced up at you. “Are you okay?” 
“I have to go.” 
“What?” 
“I’m sorry, but I have to go.” 
“Wait, I don’t understand. Did something happen? Did I offend you or something? Baby, I-” 
“Mommy, can we go to the park after this?” 
“Sure. If you really want to, we can get ice cream too.” 
“With sprinkles?” 
“Of course, with sprinkles.” 
It was the final nail in the coffin. You could feel your heart starting to burst in your chest. You found your wallet in your pocket, fumbled for cash, and slammed it down on the table in front of Hyunjin. He looked at you entirely frazzled, but you didn’t catch it. 
“I’m sorry, this should be enough to pay for everything.” 
You walked away without another word. Too shocked to stop you, Hyunjin watched you go. He didn’t know what to say to you. Did you just dump him in the middle of your date? The two of you had been dating for a while. 
All he could do was sigh and sip more of his wine. When the waiter approached and asked if everything was alright, all he could do was ask for another refill on his wine. He couldn’t understand what was going on in your head. What did he do wrong? 
Late that evening, he attempted to text you, but you never returned it. The next morning, you didn’t return his call. One evening grew into another and then another and then another and then another. 
You saw all of it; the bursts of text messages, begging for some sort of explanation. The vibrations of phone calls where his name was still left under the cheesy contact name you gave him since the two of you began to date each other. 
The longing you once had for him had turned into an empty hollowness. If your own mother wouldn’t want you, then why would Hyunjin put up with you? He deserved something better than you. Someone smarter, someone prettier, someone who wasn’t rotting from their past. He deserved better.
And you? You’d continue the sad journey of life. You were giving up the relationship for Hyunjin. He didn’t know it now, but soon he’d learn how rotten you were. You’d push him away until he’d rip off the rose tinted glasses and see the reality of what you were; a monster created with a heart of glass and gnashing teeth. What little beauty laid in the world, you destroyed it with a single touch. 
Your plan was flawless and you were executing it perfectly. Every painstaking voicemail Hyunjin left, you didn’t respond to. You didn’t bother opening them, you sent them straight to the trash. You left him text and call you because, in some twisted way, it was comforting. It was comforting that he still wanted you, despite everything. 
That was an awful way to think, but you couldn’t help it. You had always wanted to be wanted and here was someone wanting you. You wanted to give him an explanation, but you were too afraid. You didn’t want to admit that you weren’t good enough for him. You didn’t think you’d be able to get out the words without bursting into tears. 
So you let yourself rot. You got up and went to work and then collapsed in your bed. The world around you became hazy as the dark bags grew beneath your eyes. The knots in your hair became tighter and your clothes became more and more loose. You didn’t know how to put yourself back together again. 
Nearly a week later, the texts and calls stopped. It all stopped and you were relieved and yet heartbroken. Speckled confusion stained your soul. Everything was okay and yet, it was one of the worst things to feel in your life. Once again, you were alone. 
Curled up into a ball on your bed, you fell asleep. You didn’t bother curling beneath the blankets under your body. You didn’t try to fight the wave of sadness that left you exhausted. You let yourself rot again. The tumultuous state of your mind seeped out into your apartment again. 
You didn’t eat much and when you did, you didn’t have the energy to do the dishes. They were starting to overflow in the sink. Your laundry hamper was filled with clothes and bursting over the top. The trash needed to be taken out, but you couldn’t muster the will to do it. Life didn’t get to you often, but when it did, it was bad.
The banging on your door caused your eyes to open. Encrusted with sleep, you struggled to make sense of the noise. You laid there listening, but it didn’t stop. Over and over it went again and again. 
You didn’t know how long it took you to pull your aching body up. You were still hazy from the dreamless sleep. With a yawn, you stumbled to the front door, fumbled with the lock, and jerked it open. 
Hyunjin’s eyes were wide when he saw you. Your eyes were glassy and red. You must have been crying at some point. He gently stepped toward you and cupped your cheek. You blinked while trying to make sense of his sudden appearance. 
“What are you doing here?” You croaked. 
“Are you okay?” 
“I’m fine.” 
“No, you’re not.” 
“You should go.” 
“Why?” He stepped closer and crossed his arms over his chest. “Give me one good reason why I should go.” 
“Hyunjin, please, I-” 
“Did you find someone else?” 
Your face scrunched up in shock, “huh?” 
“Is that what this is?” 
“No! No, it’s not that!” 
“Then what is it?” 
Your bottom lip began to quiver. He softly called your name and gently cupped your face. “Sweetheart, what is it? Trust me, I can handle it.” 
“I don’t deserve you,” you whispered with tears glistening in your eyes.
“I don’t think that’s for you to decide. Let me in and we can talk about this together.” 
You stood in your doorway blocking the entrance. He stared at you and silently refused to budge. After a brief silent battle, you finally caved and stepped aside. He glanced around your apartment. You had drawn all the curtains, so it was nearly entirely dark; it was incredibly depressing. 
He wanted to ask, but he stayed silent instead. His eyes found you and you rubbed your eyes again. Still half asleep, you had yet to realize if this was a dream or not. 
“Are you going to tell me why you ghosted me?” 
“I don’t deserve you,” you mumbled again. 
“What do you mean by that?” 
“I’m not on the same level you are. I’m not as beautiful and I’m ugly. You’re more talented than I ever will be and I-” 
“Woah, woah, woah!” He held up a hand to stop you with wide eyes. “Honey, where is this coming from? Is that how you’ve felt the entire time while we dated?” 
It killed you. That last sentence. The truth was that he made you feel like the most beautiful person in the whole world. He made the colors around you feel brighter. Your heart grew when you were with him. It was the closest thing to normal that you ever got again. 
“Yes,” your voice came out higher. 
He recognized your dishonesty right away. “Why are you lying to me? What’s really going on with you? Why won’t you let me in? Why won’t you let me care about you?” 
Your lip quivered again. You couldn’t stop the tears from falling down. You didn’t bother hiding the sobs as you fell to your knees. Hyunjin rushed towards you and tugged you into the warmth of his arms. You cried and cried and cried some more. 
You blubbered through the situation with your mom. How the mother and daughter at the steakhouse reminded you of the past. How much you longed to be wanted and desired. The warmth of a mother that never quite reached you. On and on you went. 
By the time you were finished, you were utterly exhausted. Your head was buried in Hyunjin’s chest and he soothingly rubbed your back. A period of silence lingered between you before he spoke. 
“I’m not your mother and I can’t take away the hurt that she caused, but I can try. I don’t care what negativity she told you because none of it is true. With you around, the birds sing a little louder and the sun shines a little brighter.” 
“You have a tendency to bring love with you wherever you go, did you know what? You try to understand and make room for everyone in your life. You always listen and you try your best to help people with their problems.” 
“I’m sorry you didn’t get the mom you deserved, but your mother couldn’t be more wrong. You’re not an awful person and you don’t deserve to die. I can’t believe she said something like that to you.” 
He let out a soft sigh and closed his eyes. “You mean everything to me and I love you; all of you. Every flaw, every scar, every pore. I’ll take you as you are and not how your mother thinks you should be. You’re perfect how you are.” 
His cheek dipped down and rested on the back of your scalp. Your arms were wrapped around his ribs. Tears silently trickled down your cheeks and seeped into his shirt. 
“I’ll stay here as long as you need me to. Please don’t push me away. I want to love you like I always do and like I always have. My love for you is sincere and it’s not something I take lightly. You’re one in a million and no matter what you think, I wouldn’t be happy with someone else. I want you and that’s it.” 
After a few more beats of silence, he broke it again. “Are you hungry?” 
You shook your head, but your stomach growled at the same time. Hyunjin chuckled and tightened his grip on you. “I think you’re lying and you need food. We’re going to get food, but first-” 
Curiously, you lifted your head up. Your glossy eyes met his. His heart panged with a wave of agony. He couldn’t believe your mother had destroyed you and abandoned you with these vile thoughts. This self-hatred and insecurities, he hated that you struggled so much. 
“You know what happens to liars?” 
You shrugged. 
“They get tickled as a punishment.” 
Your eyes widened as he grinned. You scrambled and tried to get away, but he was faster. His fingers went directly to your stomach and he began to tickle you. You squirmed and laughed, trying to free yourself from his wiggling fingers. 
Despite everything, your laughter lit his heart ablaze. You were his and he was yours. He’d never stop reminding you of how much he loved you. No matter how long it took, he’d be here until his dying breath if he had to be.
| ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ | ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ | ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ |
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starry-eyes-love · 3 days
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Calm Me Down
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Main Masterlist Joel Miller Masterlist
The next chapter in the Marriage Dynamics series
Pairing | Husband Joel Miller x Wife F!Reader- AU, No Outbreak
Summary | You wake up having a panic attack, and Joel calms you down. This results in the two of you talking, calming each other’s fears, and finally working through your problems. You feel movement in your pregnancy for the first time while Joel silently talks to his unborn child, asking for a gift that he doesn’t know yet but will receive.
Work Count: 5.5K
Warnings | Series is 18+, Minor DNI
Age difference (implied), language, descriptions of anxiety/panic attack, flashbacks, marriage dynamics (these two finally communicate), hurt and comfort, tenderness and love, mentions of pregnancy, you feel baby movement for the first time, mild reference to past cheating (your father and Joel's ex-wife, not from Joel or you), mild references in the past to physical abuse by your father, references to berating your father did to you in the past.
A/N: Sorry for taking so long on this next part, but here you are. As a reminder, I no longer do tag lists. Make sure to turn on notifications for when I post new written pieces.
“Baby, look at me,” Joel said sternly, turning you around to face him. He immediately searched your eyes to get you to look at him. Joel reached out instinctively and placed a steady hand on your belly, slowly rubbing it and feeling the soft swell of your stomach that was holding and caring for his child. He was trying to help ground you and reassure you that you were okay and that your baby would be alright, too.
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These moments come out of nowhere: the sheer panic, the sweaty palms, the narrowing vision. You don't know why, but suddenly, it feels like the whole world is crashing down around you, like you are falling fast off of a cliff, unable to save yourself from sudden death. Your heart races, and you're stuck believing the lies in your head. The lies that you know are not true.
“I'm not good enough. I can't do this. I'll never be more than what I am now: a failure. My husband doesn't love me.”
This feeling inside seizes you, holds you tight, and doesn't allow you to take a proper breath. And that's ok, you think. You don't need to breathe, not yet. But the feeling doesn't stop, and your body eventually screams for another breath. The thing is, though, you can't get any air in, so you panic once again. The cycle never ends. It keeps repeating until you're drowning in your sweat and anxiety. You're having a goddamn panic attack, one that you haven't had in many years. To say you're embarrassed doesn't even come close to describing your emotions. The word you require fails to come to you, so you settle for fear, embarrassment, and loneliness.
You've been way too stressed your entire pregnancy. You're a week shy of being 20 weeks along with your third baby and your fourth pregnancy.
Yeah, we won't talk about that pregnancy. The daughter that you lost at 22 weeks pregnant. To this day, you still don't like thinking about it.
Even though this is a different pregnancy, things seem to haven't gone how you wanted. You finally did tell Joel that you were pregnant at your doctor's appointment when you started spotting blood. You were scared of admitting pregnancy to him, especially when you two had barely talked since Halloween. You didn't know why; you just weren't getting along. It's funny how life does that sometimes, isn't it?
Even though your 20th-week ultrasound was just a few days away, you felt embarrassed that nothing seemed to go as planned this time. You hadn't told Joel you were pregnant technically until you were having bleeding problems. You weren't sexually active with your husband. There was no celebration of being pregnant, just awkward silence, mostly of which came from you. Joel attempted to speak with you, but you'd always clam up and not talk. If you were being honest, it wasn't until late at night on Christmas Eve that Joel and you started to talk and get along again. 
Now, you lay awake in bed, your mind racing, running wild with panic at all the scenarios that weren't even happening. But it felt like they were happening now, and you were scared. You were drowning in panic, unable to slow your mind down, wishing for anything to stop it. 
I'm not good enough. My husband doesn’t want this and doesn't want to be with me. I'm such a horrible wife for not telling him.
Your thoughts wouldn't stop. Your mind kept racing, and you felt like you were drowning. The walls were once again closing in around you, sucking you underneath the surface. You desperately needed a lifeline to grab onto, something to save you from yourself. That's when you felt your husband reach out to you and pull you tight against his chest. He wrapped his arms around you, securing you to him while gently whispering, “Baby, come on now, breathe.”
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Earlier in the night, Joel had decided not to sleep with his shirt on, something he hadn’t done in a long time. After his shower, he noticed the way you were looking at him. Eyes wide, lips slightly parted, you looked at him like you desperately needed something primal from him.
“What's that look for, baby?” He said, glancing over at you and raising just his eyebrow. He was taunting you, wanting you to voice all those dirty little things that he knew you were thinking. He could tell by the look on your face, the way you were breathing, and how you were slowly squeezing your thighs together that you were turned on and sexually aroused. Joel may not be able to give you penetrative sex yet, but dammit, he could eat his wife's pussy if she wanted it. And Joel secretly hoped that you wished to do that tonight.
“I-uh, I-'' you said, stuttering and stammering at the words. You couldn't voice it or say it out loud for some reason. You were never afraid of dirty talk in the bedroom. But considering it has been almost 20 weeks, nearly five months since the two of you have done anything sexual, you were a bit nervous. 
“Why don't you finish getting ready for bed, baby, then come over here, and I'll get ya all nice and relaxed for bed.”
“What did you have in mind?” You asked, hoping Joel would voice it for you.
“Oh, darlin’, you know what I have in mind,” he said, slowly sticking his tongue out and moving it up and down like he does when he licks at you fast when he goes down on you.
You quickly nodded your head and then ran into the bathroom. You needed a shower and desperately needed a shave. You spent the next 20 minutes making yourself feel more sexy and presentable. But when you entered the bedroom, you noticed all your work was in vain. Joel was lying down and loudly snoring already. Immediately, your heart sank at seeing him fast asleep.
Joel intended to give you, his wife, some much-needed affection and attention. But he underestimated how tired he was. When his head hit the pillow, he was out like a light and asleep within seconds. You, however, had laid there with your eyes open, overthinking stuff once again.
You loved being pregnant, but you hated the first part of pregnancy, where the anxiety was horrible. Your doctor said because your hormones change so much in the first stages of pregnancy, anxiety is common among women. And boy, did you ever have anxiety, especially this time around with being pregnant in your late 30s. 
Even though your hormones were already leveling out, you were still nervous about knowing if your baby was growing healthy inside of you. You knew that after your 20-week ultrasound appointment, you would calm down. But you just had to get there first. You were nervous about losing this pregnancy. You remember the pregnancy you had lost; that 20th-week ultrasound showed significant problems. If everything would show that you were ok, just like the two other pregnancies did with your boys, you knew you'd calm down. You kept telling yourself that everything would be ok. But that crippling anxiety kept sneaking up at you at the worst times and holding you tight, like tonight.
The longer the night continued, the more you wanted to reach out and have your husband hold you tight to help calm your fears. But he looked so peaceful lying there sleeping; you didn't want to wake him. You both were getting along again, and there was no more fighting between you. So you didn't know where this anxiousness was coming from tonight. Your body felt off, and you didn't know why.  You had tried to fall asleep, struggling with your mind to get any rest. At one point, you had dozed off a little bit, but you quickly woke up in a panic, sweating profusely. You were smack dab in the middle of yet another bad panic attack. You haven't had one of these episodes of panic for many years. Usually, stress or something larger would trigger them, but nothing unusual has happened recently. So you lay there silently, trying to will all of these bad feelings that you were having away. But no matter what you did, you could still feel your heart race and your chest constrict. It felt like you couldn't fully take a deep breath.  You were drowning fast in terror and panic, not knowing if you could get yourself out of it anymore. You didn't realize in your panicked state that your husband woke up. But then, all of a sudden, when your chest constricted the tightest, and you thought you were going to die from lack of oxygen, you felt Joel’s strong arms wrap around you. He gently pulled you to him, where your back met his chest. He let out a long exhale while slowly whispering, “Baby, come on, breathe.
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After Joel had laid down, he had fallen asleep suddenly, too suddenly for his liking. He wanted to cuddle you and give you much-needed attention and affection. Joel could see that you were stressed with work and raising the boys, and Joel's chaotic work schedule didn't help you. He recently hired a manager to work out in the field with Tommy so he could stay back in the office more and focus on the business side of things.  His contracting business was expanding, growing at a rapid rate where Joel didn’t need to be out in the field all the time working. He could take that much-needed break and focus his time and skills on the best ways of growing his company. 
Joel suddenly was jolted awake by something, but he was unsure of what.  When he opened his eyes, Joel saw your back as you were facing away from him. Joel thought maybe it was a bad dream that had woken him up.  Slowly, he ran his hand down his face, slightly shaking it and yawning to clear his head.  Upon looking over at you again, Joel saw that you were curled up into a ball, looking like you were resting peacefully.  He smiled silently, admiring you and what looked like your peaceful slumber. But then he heard it, the small sob that left your chest as you struggled to breathe in air.  Joel frowned, knowing all too well that you were panicking and having a bad panic attack yet again.
Baby, I thought we stopped these, he thought, not enjoying seeing his wife struggle.  He knew you were drowning in your head, unable to get your head above water as gulp after gulp of quick spurts of air were leaving your lungs.  You were like a lost ship out to sea, desperately looking for a way back into port.  Joel knew he was your only lifeline, and it broke his heart that he needed to be this again.  He loved you and always supported you, but seeing you panic like this broke his heart.  Something was bothering you, and he hoped, like hell, that someone wasn’t him.
“Baby, come on, breathe.” He said, slowly reaching out to you and pulling you into his chest.
But you couldn't; your heart was hammering in your chest, and it wouldn't slow down. “I can't breathe,” you said, hyperventilating and sobbing. You didn't know what was wrong or why, but it felt like you couldn't breathe. “Something’s wrong, Joel, I can’t- I can’t breathe.” You said, rushing air in and out of your lungs fast. 
“Baby, look at me,” Joel said sternly, turning you around to face him. He immediately searched your eyes to get you to look at him. Joel reached out instinctively and placed a steady hand on your belly, slowly rubbing it and feeling the soft swell of your stomach that was holding and caring for his child. He was trying to help ground you and reassure you that you were okay and that your baby would be alright, too.
As soon as your eyes met his, you started sobbing and saying, “I can't do this. I'm a failure. I'm always fucking up. No one cares about m-me or loves me.”
“No, babe. Come on now, look at me,” Joel said, cupping your cheeks and forcing you to open your eyes to look at him.  “Come on, with me, yeah? Breathe.”  Joel then took a slow, deep breath, and you mirrored his actions.
“That’s it, sugar, nice and slow,” he said, breathing with you. He was trying to slow your breathing down. After readjusting himself, Joel sat beside you, gently taking your hand and placing it on his chest, holding it tight against him. 
“Feel how I breathe, darlin', now match it. Come on now, slow breath in.” 
*Joel took a slow breath in.*
 “Now, slowly breathe out.” 
*Joel slowly breathed out.*
“And again,” he said, getting you to focus on slowing your breathing down. One of his hands held yours against his chest so that you could feel the pattern of his breaths. The other hand was protectively lying over your bump, gently stroking the skin, centering both you and him that everything was alright with your baby.
After several moments of slowing your breathing and getting you to breathe normally again, you finally sighed and said, “Thanks, Joel.”  
Still sitting above you, Joel furrowed his brow as he looked at you. He didn’t know why you were having a panic attack tonight. It stressed him out and worried him, especially since you were pregnant. He didn’t want you to get too stressed out and put the baby you were carrying under any more stress. After a long moment of observing you, Joel finally sighed and asked, “Why d’ya think you’re a failure?” As he waited for your response, he slowly started stroking your belly once again.
“I don’t know, I- I was upset and spouted my mouth off. I didn’t mean anything by it.”
“Don’t give me that shit of ‘didn’t mean anything by it.’ Christ woman.” Joel said, pinching the bridge of his nose with his hand while removing his other hand from your belly.  
You frowned slightly at his movements, knowing that now he was agitated. You didn't want to have any more arguments with him. You two have been finally getting along for a while, and you weren't in the mood to go back to the way things were, where you hardly spoke, and if you did, it would result in an argument. To you, those days were behind you. 
When Joel felt you stiffen below him, he froze. He was frustrated at the situation tonight. Something was bothering you to the point where it made you panic, and he wanted to know why. Why did you think that you were a failure? He felt his heart ache when you continued to look up at the ceiling, not wanting to look at him for fear that it'd start another argument. 
Since when did Joel Miller become such an asshole that his wife didn't want to look at him? Since when did he become your father?
Joel took a deep breath and sighed, realizing how harsh his attitude had been these past few months. Yeah, you two haven't had sex since Halloween, almost five months ago. He reasoned with himself that the lack of sexual intercourse was because of the doctor's orders. But you two haven't done anything else either. Joel didn't blame you; he blamed himself for the change. Tommy even commented the other day to Joel that his brother had changed, but not in a good way. Yeah, Joel Miller was an asshole. But what bothered him the most was he's been an asshole to you, and you've never deserved it.
Sighing at this realization, he turned towards you and gently touched your chin. “Hey, look at me, will ya,” he said, cupping your cheek with his hand. When you finally decided to look at him, he smiled tenderly and whispered, “I love you. You know that, right, baby?”
He felt his eyes sting when you didn't answer and just stared at him. Joel Miller has been drastically fucking things up.
“I'm so fucking sorry, darlin’,” he said while gently placing his hand back again on your bump. “I’m sorry for makin’ this. For fucking everything up where I wasn’t there for you emotionally like I should have been.”
You just glared at him, struggling to keep your tears from falling. “Y-you didn't, shit,” you said, brushing a single tear away from your cheeks. I’m not doing this right now. I’m not going to break down again, you thought. 
Joel could see you were struggling not to get emotional, and he was trying so hard to find ways to fix what he had already broken. “Baby, I was so mad at what ya told me on Halloween. That I wasn't rockin’ your sexual world anymore. I got, fuck baby, I got mad and jealous.”
“Seriously? What could you have been jealous about?” You said, snapping at him with more force than you intended. You were confused and slightly irritated at your husband. Joel was the one who shut you out after Halloween, not you. He barely spoke to you, held you; hell, he still hasn't even fucked you since that night. Sure, you pulled away, too, and you didn't tell him you were pregnant. But every time you tried to open up, he'd shut you down, yell at you, or treat you like you weren't his wife. You sat in silence, not knowing how to respond to your husband. Joel wasn't moving or answering you either, and for a minute, you thought that maybe he'd fallen asleep. But then you heard it, a sniffle, followed by a choked-off sob.
“Joel-” you said softer, looking over at him as you noticed tears streaming down his face. He placed a hand over his eyes, sobbing into it. You didn't understand what was happening or why he was giving you this emotional response.
“I'm s-sorry. I'm so fucking sorry that you d-don't want to be w-with me anymore.” Joel said, continuing to sob into his hand.
Where the hell was this all coming from? You thought. “Baby, what are you talking about? Of course I-”
“Don’t,” Joel said sternly, quickly brushing his tears away. Joel hated crying by himself, and he hated crying in front of you. After taking a moment to collect himself, he leaned down and whispered to your belly, “I'm so sorry that Daddy has fucked this up. I-I love both you and your mama so fucking much, ok?” He gently kissed your belly and wiped the remaining tears from his eyes away. When he sat up, he looked around the room, admiring the home you two had built together, with the front of him facing away from you.
Joel wouldn't look at you, even when you asked him. You were scared, scared of what was coming next. You knew this scene, knew it well from your father. It would be the moment that Joel would tell you he’s been sleeping with someone else.  He’d tell you that you were too much for him and that he couldn’t help it, that it was an accident. You also waited for the words ‘you ruined my life’ to come to his lips, just like your father told you before. But the longer you waited, the longer it was apparent that those words would never come. That’s when you felt your heart begin to race again.
“I can practically hear those gears turning in your head, love. Stop overthinking things. I just wanted to say that you deserve better; you both do. And I know I'm not your favorite human right now and that you’re ashamed to carry my child-”
“Joel Miller, what are you even talking about? I'm not ashamed of-”
Joel stopped you by raising a hand, silencing you, saying, “Please, just let me finish.” He then continued when he knew you wouldn't interrupt him again. “I've, I'm- shit- I'm not good with this stuff, with words. I just- fuck.” 
Joel didn't know what he was trying to say. He felt sorry for Halloween and for the miscommunication you two had. He’s been moody since then and not present in his marriage. He was also very sorry for not making you feel comfortable enough to tell him things again, like when you were first pregnant. But most of all, he was sorry for disappointing you as a man and husband.
When Joel realized the last admission in his mind, he felt tears well up again. You had opened your mouth to speak again, but Joel interrupted you by saying, “Ya know, I think my ex-wife was right all those years ago.”
“How so?” you said, tensing at the mention of her.
“She said I always fucked things up, and that's why she was- uh- why it didn't work out between us.” Joel almost said it. The thing he hadn’t told you. That his first wife was unfaithful because he wasn't present in their marriage and didn't give her enough support after Sarah was born.
“Joel,” you said while slowly grabbing his hand. “Baby, I'm not her, and for the record, you ain't fucking things up.”
Joel snorted at your comment, saying, “Darlin', we both know that ain't true. You're pregnant with my child. And you didn't even want to tell me because of it, because of me.”
“Joel, I didn't tell you because I was scared. I'm a woman in my middle thirties who told her husband life was stale in the bedroom. On that same night, he also knocked me up. I wanted to tell you immediately, but as soon as I attempted, you weren't there. You were working 16-hour days and moody because of no help at work. Yeah, I fucked up. I should have said something, but I was scared. I was scared I was trapping you in a marriage you didn't want.”
“What do you mean a marriage I didn't want? Baby, I love you and want you, always. I've never felt trapped, not ever. Why are you thinkin’ that?” Joel said, screwing his face up and not understanding why you thought he didn't want to be married.
“I don't know, just something my dad said when-”
“I ain't your old man,” Joel said, grinding his teeth and flaring his nostrils. At one time, your father, Pat, was Joel's best friend. But that abruptly ended when Pat laid his hands on his daughter and unforgivably hurt her.
“I know it's just- I was worried you didn't want this, want me. I know I'm a lot, a handful, that-” Your voice started to tremble, and your lip was quivering. You couldn't say it out loud. But Joel knew it was the last thing you heard your father say before you walked out of his life, forever.
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Flashback
“Joel, I know my daughter, ok? She's a handful, a complete pain in the ass, and a liability. One that I wish like hell wasn't my damn responsibility anymore. So do yourself a favor; don't get involved. She'll just ruin your life. She’s already ruined mine.”
You had stood there and heard your father tell Joel, your new fiance, he didn't want you as a daughter anymore. That you being around was a burden to him and his life. You were standing in the kitchen as Pat, your father, talked to Joel in the living room. You weren't supposed to hear the conversation, and you knew that. But with what you heard, it had shattered you. You walked out of your father's house with tears in your eyes, never returning. It was good that you walked out before you heard your father's last comment. The one comment that yet today made Joel grind his teeth and see red anytime he thought about it.
“Joel, that girl of mine is nothin’ but a goddamn whore. A bitch, just like her mother. She'll just hurt you in the end. My advice, make sure you have a little something on the side, a nice piece of ass as I did, just as a pick me up. Trust me, you'll get sick of looking at her pathetic ass day in and day out. I did with her mother, and it felt great to go and get some much-needed attention from the girls I had on the side…”
After your father called you a whore and told Joel what took place when Joel had you hang out at his house, he felt sick and saw red with anger. Your dad's weekend trips and late-night house calls were due to him fucking around on your mom, a woman who was battling cancer and eventually lost. But the worst thing that Joel found out was that all those black eyes you were supporting in high school and college weren't because you got into a fight or that a boyfriend hit you. No, Pat was getting drunk and using his fists against his daughter's face. Joel also had a sneaky suspicion that the two cracked ribs you had in college also came from Pat.  Joel couldn't believe that his best friend did that, and worse, you never said anything. Joel would have stopped it immediately if he had known. Pat was no longer in either of your lives anymore.
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Present Day
“Baby, you ain't too much, so stop thinking that. C’mere.” Joel said, having you come and sit on his lap while he placed his back against the headboard.
He helped you straddle him, putting your hard baby belly against his softer belly. Your bump prevented you from getting as close as usual, but it was close enough that Joel could still wrap his arms around you and rest his forehead against yours.  
“Now, darlin’, I want you to take a deep breath for me, ok?”  After you took a deep breath and slowly let it out, you felt your heartbeat return to normal, along with his.  
“I’m so sorry, Joel, that I didn’t tell you-”
“Don’t. Please darlin’. I-I don’t care what we’ve done before. I care about the right here and now. Please.”
You could feel how stressed Joel was. How his muscles tensed with you, referencing you were sorry again for not telling your husband at the beginning of your pregnancy that you were pregnant.  If you could do it again, but differently, you would.  But that’s not life.  Life is about living in the moment, feeling emotions, and allowing yourself to experience it in its messy glory.  It’s about making mistakes and then learning from those mistakes.  But most of all, it’s about forgiveness, hope, compassion, love, and understanding.  You both understood that the choices made these past few months were out of anger, frustration, and loneliness.
With your eyes closed and your understanding of the situations that have surrounded the two of you for a while, you quietly said, “I love you, old man.”
Joel let out a small snort at your teasing. ‘Old man’ was a nickname you gave him long ago when the two of you started dating, and now it was a term of endearment. 
“I love you too, baby girl,” he said, slowly nuzzling his nose against yours.  
When you pulled back and opened your eyes, you saw your husband looking at you lovingly.  His eyes were so soft, tenderness seen behind them. He was your lifeline that tethered you to this world, keeping you anchored and not drifting.  When he slowly kissed you, you felt him tell you in the kiss that you were loved and that everything would be alright.  He was your rock, your protector, your soulmate. But more importantly, he was your Joel. The man who saw you for what you were inside. He saw past your faults and insecurities, of you believing you were too much. He gave you a safe place to land and be in the moment.  You had a lifetime with him, helped him raise Sarah, and gave birth to two strong-willed little boys you loved dearly. And now you were pregnant again, with a baby that was half him and half you growing inside of you. This little one was very much a surprise, but the best possible surprise.  It forced you both to stop your chaotic lives and slow down to remember what life was all about Love.
After several tender kisses, you started to giggle against his mouth.  Joel pulled back at your giggling, confused at your antics. “Darlin’, are you laughing at me?”
You continued giggling and said, “No, Joel, I’m not,” but then you giggled again.
“Baby, please-”
“Joel, I just felt the baby move.”
Joel’s eyebrows shot up, surprised, looking at you with excitement. “R-really? Just now?”
“Yes, just now, when I was thinking how much I loved you and how much this child is teaching us that we need to communicate still, to be strong, and-”
Joel slowly moved his hands down to your stomach and rubbed it tenderly.  He knew he wouldn’t feel movement for another few weeks.  But seeing you feel life for the first time was the best possible gift one could experience with you.  The joy on your face at the realization that a baby was growing inside you, one that he helped create.
“There it is again,” you said, smiling and giggling. You placed your hand right over Joel’s hand, right where you felt movement.  It felt like a cricket, or something ran across your stomach, but from the inside.  It was always the oddest feeling that you’d feel. It wasn’t a full kick yet; those would come in a few weeks.  But in this movement, it always made you laugh when you’d feel it for the first time.
When you looked up at Joel, you were beaming with the biggest smile, while he had the most tender look in his eyes. Softly, he rubbed his thumb back and forth over your skin, giving you and his baby affection. “She's telling her mama that she loves her.”
“Joel, it’s too early. We don’t-” you said, choking up with emotion.  Joel knew you wanted a girl so badly, especially after the two of you lost the only pregnancy before where you were pregnant with a girl. It was a sore subject for the two of you. 
Before, when you were pregnant with a girl, Joel had come home early from work because you said you weren’t feeling well.  He noticed you were sleeping on the couch when he entered the house. Joel quietly went upstairs and showered, but you yelled for him while he was washing his body. Joel quickly rinsed himself off and ran out to the living room, wearing nothing but a towel with water still dripping down his back. When he got to you, you were sitting up and crying.  When he had asked you what was wrong, you pulled back the blanket, and Joel saw a large pool of bright red blood on the couch. You were rushed to the hospital by ambulance, but it was already too late.  The girl you were pregnant with had no heartbeat detected. You stayed in the hospital for observation, delivering the tiny baby that night. 
After you were asleep in the hospital, Joel had gone home. He took the sledgehammer to the couch, tears streaming down his face while hitting it. Tommy found him beating the hell out of the sofa, crying and screaming at how much he hated the world for taking the one thing that you wanted away from you: a little girl.
And now, all these years later, when you hear Joel reference a girl, you can’t help but get scared. Sure, you hoped for a girl and dreamed of it again, but you also didn't want to go through losing another baby once again.   
“It’s just a hunch, darlin’, and don’t worry, mama; I’ll keep you both safe.  Now come on, time for you both to go to bed.” Joel said, wrapping you in his arms to help silence your fears.
Joel laid you down and got you situated after he brought you some water to drink.  He pulled you tight to him, your back against his bare chest as he traced small circles on your belly, helping you quickly fall asleep.  After Joel knew you were sleeping soundly, he quietly whispered, “Little one, please stay in here no matter what, ok? I don’t know if you’re a girl or a boy, but I think you may be a girl this time.  Regardless, your mama needs you to be healthy, and Daddy needs you to be healthy. You’ve heard bad words these past few months when your mama and I have been arguing. But please know, I’m beyond excited to be a dad yet again, your dad. I love you both so much, ok. Stay in there, and let your mama have a nice, easy pregnancy, ok? I love you.”
Joel stilled his hand on your bump, gently holding it snug while he drifted off to sleep. Neither of you knew that deep inside your belly, a tiny baby girl was growing nice and strong. Even though this pregnancy was difficult at times, that baby had no plans of leaving anytime soon. She would be the miracle and the one thing that helped you focus on fixing your marriage once and for all. 
They say that life throws the most challenging curveballs when you least expect them and that sometimes those challenging events shape you into a better human being. That’s always been the story for you and Joel, and now, you both are about to enter the exciting part of your pregnancy—the one that will reshape your current Marriage Dynamics.
End of Chapter
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archangeldyke-all · 2 days
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Sevika getting all soft and whiny as you loving give her the strap. She gets all clingy after she cums her brains out and just wants to be babied and cuddled. Will get mad if you try to get up after cuddles 🙏🏽
hng...
men and minors dni
"'s it feel good, baby?"
you don't really need to ask. you know the answer, you can tell by the way she's clawing at your back, the way her thighs are shivering, her glassy eyes and heart-shaped pupils blinking up at you as she nods.
but, you ask anyways, 'cause you like hearing her talk when she's on bottom.
"so good, so good, baby, y' fuck me so good. i-i need more. fuck, i need--"
"harder?" you guess. sevika whimpers, noddding against your shoulder. she always needs it rougher when she's close to cumming. you don't mind. you just hitch her leg further up, pressing deeper into her.
"ooo-oooh!" she whines. you start nipping at her lips, her jaw open as she gasps and sputters.
"gonna cum for me sev?" you ask, kissing her nose. she whimpers, nodding.
"y-yea--"
"god, you're so fuckin' perfect. so beautiful, baby. y' look so good fallin' apart under me." you whine. "fuck, you're gonna make me cum, just lookin' at you."
your words tip sevika over, and she cums with a gasp, her fingernails drawing blood on your shoulders as she shudders and cries. "b-baby fuck!" she whines.
you try to keep your eyes open long enough to watch her entire orgasm, but the sight of her falling apart hits you like a punch to the gut, and before you know what's happening, you're collapsing on top of her, cumming your brains out inside her while you bury your face in her neck. "sev." you whimper.
for a minute or two, the room's silent besides the sound of your shared labored breathing.
"think i just came my brains out." you mutter eventually, finding enough strength to push yourself up.
sevika gasps as you rise, and you freeze-- panicked.
"what-- does it hurt?!" you ask, worried. she just pouts up at you, then reaches up to wrap her arms around your shoulders and tug you back down on top of her. you burst into giggles as you collapse, sevika's legs coming up to wrap around your hips as well.
"where the fuck are you going?!" she whines. you laugh against her throat, peppering kisses over her neck.
"sorry, sorry, i forgot you need your cuddles." you tease. "you're usually all pissy about layin' in cum."
"'s when i'm on top. you just fucked me, so now we cuddle." she explains, like it's simple math. you hum, starting to comb through her hair as you settle yourself on top of her.
"why don't i get cuddles?" you pout. sevika snorts.
"'cause if i cuddled you each time i fucked you, we'd be out of time to do other things like, y'know, working. eating. sleep--"
you cut her off by biting her ear lobe. she bursts into giggles and you melt on top of her, soaking in the sound of her laughter.
it's rare that sevika wants to bottom, but you're always thrilled when she does. you like her like this. you like her all ways, but she's exceptionally sweet and needy when she's on bottom. it's adorable.
"you know you're the love of my life?" you ask. sevika's fingers-- which had been trailing up and down your spine-- freeze.
"really?" she whispers. you lift your head up to look down at your wife, worried that she sounds so surprised.
"honey, we're married!" you laugh, nodding. sevika huffs, and her fingers start their path again.
"i know, i was just thinkin' the same thing." she admits. "like, word for word."
you grin, then press a kiss to her lips. "i'm gonna cuddle you for half an hour, then we're gonna fuck again, then i'm calling for a delivery pizza and drawing us a bubble bath. how's that sound?" you ask. sevika hums.
"cuddles in the bath?" she asks pathetically. you burst into laughter, kiss her again, and nod when her sad, wet, puppy dog eyes blink up at you.
"don't think there's a way for us to both fit and not be cuddling, sev." you joke. she just grunts, bites your shoulder, and smacks your ass.
you muffle your laughs against her shoulder.
taglist!
@fyeahnix @sapphicsgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner @shimtarofstupidity @love-sugarr @chuucanchuucan @222danielaa @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther @gr0ssz0mbi3 @ellsss @sevikaspillowprincess @leomatsuzaki @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai @vikasub @glass-apothecary
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heelluring · 2 days
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1:37 am — lee heeseung
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when you forgot to sit on your boyfriend's lap
It was friday night, and not just a friday night. It was one of the rare nights where the two of you are completely free from all the responsibilities you had for the past weekdays. It was the night where the two of you will excitedly have your movie night, with non healthy food like chips and popcorn, or just a ramen gourmet your boyfriend, heeseung made.
He was in the living room, setting up your humble 'theater' spot, just waiting for you to finish sending one last email for work. Heeseung was excited, he was waiting so patiently with a small on his face. The lighthearted kids' movie was ready to be played anytime once you're ready. Heeseung look back to the room where you are for the nth time. His right leg bouncing from being excited, can't wait to just be with you. It didn't took long when you finally emerged from the room.
Oblivious at how your boyfriend's eyes lightened than ever once he took your sight in. How his smile widens than before. Shame on you for not seeing that because you keep your eyes on your phone to send one last reminder for your work next week.
"Okay, hee... done!" You took your own comfort beside him on the couch, tapping his legs without looking back, excited for the movie night. It's been five seconds and your boyfriend hasn't moved, thought he'll grab the remote and finally start the movie— he didn't.
That's why you can't stop yourself from finally looking at him, confused winning on your face. And, that confusion made more evident when you saw how offended heeseung look staring at you. His wide eyes looking straight, his mouth agape. He looks like a confused and offended fish, staring as if you grown two heads at once.
"What?" When the question came out, his eyes widens a fraction tilting his head as if asking, 'are you serious?!' in his own silly ways. "What?!" You dramatically raised your voice, giggling at his antics.
"Really? On the couch, Y/n? Wow, I'm hurt." When he sees that your confusion didn't seize, he playfully clicked his tongue, hitting his thigh timelessly. "You should've sit here..." Hit, "Here..." Hit, "Here!" And again, another hit.
"You had the privileges to use my lap as your personal chair, and you didn't take it. I am so offended, wow. My girlfriend betrayed me, and I am so speechless" The last sentence came out as a 'whisper', as if he's saying it to himself rather but the way his voice was loud enough to hear it convinced that it was a snide for you too. "I was ready, y'know? I— my... my legs were ready. It was spreading just for you, and you choose the couch?"
You unbelievable exhaled, eyes still onto him. He is so dramatic and silly, you can even see that he's serious about all of this. Finally feeling the weight of this 'issue', you giggled dragging your sorry's to make it cuter before smoothly sliding on his lap. "I'm sorry... hee" You whispered hiding your face on his neck as you hug him sideways, planting a smack on the side of his neck after. "I promise I'll always sit on your lap for our movie night. I promise!" Childlessly raising your hands, you successfully hear heeseung's laugh. Giving you a kiss directly on the lips as he hugs you back.
"Yeah, you should. I would not tolerate any mistakes in the future. You might forfeit your girlfriend privileged on my lap" Your forehead in contact with his as he whispered those 'threats' with his eyes close but a wide smile on his lips.
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— Note !
a spontaneous idea when i saw a video about heeseung being the type of boyfriend who'll spread his legs for you. ODBSI I HAD TO TYPE IT SO HERE IT IS. still busy with school but i'll def edit this and write more once I'm free (might be on summer vacation). hope yall are doing great ❣️
©heelluring | 2024
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itsgrimeytime · 3 days
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The Lover || Rick Grimes (TWD) x gn!reader
1...
rick grimes taglist: @golden-hoax @mgparker @zomb-1-egutzz
AVAILABLE ON AO3
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The Sequel to The Nurse (my series masterlist)
Summary: A long time ago, you were Rick Grimes's nurse. Now, you loved him, and he loved you. Or at least that's where you left it off. With Judith safe in your arms and Rick distinctly not by your side, you could only hope his feelings stayed the same because they sure as hell did for you.
TWs: blood, inhumane rage (you're kinda crazy in this one ngl), threatening someone's life, vague mention of murder, blades, and all things TWD.
[[A/N: heyyy, it's finally here!!! it's going to be less of Rick in this one for obvious reasons. At least for now. Looked it up and it took 10 days to get to Alexandria for the main group, so I'm going to be writing those for these first few chapters. Thanks for reading!!!]]
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It had been two days since the prison -you could only count by the sun setting and the nightfall. You were running on autopilot, step after step; periodically feeding Judith because she wasn't crying anymore. You hadn't had any run-ins, not yet.
Your hand clenched against your side -tight on your axe. It was still the same fire-axe that you'd gotten at the hospital -blood ingrained in the blade and handle from your entire journey. You weren't sure it would wash off at this point.
It felt like a part of you now. Always there, familiar.
Like Rick had, or Carl, or Judith, or anyone at the prison-
You swallowed, they're alive. You know it.
You didn't, but it helped to think so.
If they get hurt, they've got Hershel, they'll survive, you assured, trying not to let the guilt bubble into your stomach.
Judith fussed a little then -the gentle pull of her eyebrows and squirming in her makeshift carrier. Your hand immediately came to soothe, smoothing against her head -gently whispering to shush her.
You were hidden away in a shack -somewhere along the road. It provided shelter, and that was enough for now. Pulling out a can of... something, you couldn't remember, you stabbed your knife through and opened it up. You'd been rationing, only eating when necessary; in the case that Judith's formula ran out, you wanted to keep her fed.
The first thing you'd noticed was the snap of a branch, just a single branch. It singled out in the night. Walkers would break more than one, you remembered.
Judith was asleep on your chest, you didn't dare move her; she was safer with you than without you. You knew that well.
Carefully, you put the can by your side, gently as if to not make any other sounds that would bring attention to you. You or Judith. All that you were running on was adrenaline, and just the urge to protect, protect, protect-
If whoever this was tried to lay a hand on Judith-
You carefully stood up, pulling your axe off the ground with you. Swinging it around in your hands, it was so familiar now. Attached to you. You weren't sure how to feel about it, but you couldn't really feel anything now -your mind was focused. Shelter, food, water, and Judith.
There was nothing else in this world for you. Not now.
With a breath, you slammed the door open -axe at the ready. You didn't catch on anyone at first, but then you heard it again and spun on your feet. You eyes settled on someone.
Their hands were shaking, but they held a gun to you -metal tip pointing and glinting in the sun. Your jaw tightened, as you gnawed on your lip, hands solid on your axe.
"Drop it," they spoke, but their voice was shaky. You could physically see their hands shake, something in your stomach steeled, "-or I'll-"
"I wouldn't," you remarked, bitterly -not an ounce of anything but anger melding along your words.
They pressed their lips together, seeming to gain a little more confidence, "I have a gun, I will shoot-"
You spoke again, tone sharp -something flashing behind your eyes.
"I wouldn't."
Protect, protect, protect-
They stared at you, something smoothing through their eyes. Something flashing, their lip trembling ever so slightly. You didn't flinch.
"What, all you have is an axe-"
"Did you know-" you hummed carefully stepping toward them, voice measured and careful, "-there are 1.5 gallons of blood in the human body?"
They snapped their lips shut, as you roamed closer, pressing the blade into their space. Tantalizingly close to their neck.
"And it only takes one little slice to lose it all?"
They froze for a moment, just one second. And you reacted instinctively, elbowing the gun out of their hands. It flew off into the bushes (snaps of branches telling you it did), but you kept your eyes solely on them. Lips pressed into a thin line.
"Look," they retracted, something pleading in their eyes, "-all I want is some food. I just- I haven't eaten in days."
You stared at them, axe still close to their neck -the vein that would do the job. You knew that, you'd read it in textbooks, seen bloody hands try to apply pressure, but it was too quick. Too fast.
"You threatened to kill my baby," you tsked, jutting the axe forward a little more. It was just a hair away and something in you was angry, so angry. Just an inch, just an inch, just an inch-
Protect, protect, protect-
"I wasn't going to! Not really, I just-" their eyes sunk to the blade, teary now, "-Please, I... I don't want to die like this-"
Protect, protect, protect-
You took a heavy breath in, eyes squeezing shut, hand clenching your axe so tight your knuckles were white. Something in you recentering, coming back to earth.
You pulled back the axe, but didn't let up your stare, growling, "If you ever try and hurt her again, I'll snap your spine myself."
They swallowed, blearily.
Motioning to the shack, you spoke -sharply, "There's some leftovers in there, take them."
They scrambled then, for the can, but you took pause a second. Carefully putting your axe back in place, you asked, "Have you seen a man and a kid? The kid, he... he wears a sheriff's hat."
The person seemed confused, maybe from so blatant of a switch, with the can gathered up in their hands. Still, they pressed their lips together, and answered, "I haven't."
Your heart stung, and you swallowed, nodding. With a breath, you set off to start walking again, it was morning -you needed to be productive in the daylight. But they stopped you.
"For your good, and the kid's," they warned, "-don't go to Terminus."
"Terminus?" You questioned.
"You're heading that way," they continued, eyes portraying a seriousness, "-they say it's a safe place. It's not. Don't go there."
"And," you breathed out, "-where should I go?"
They seemed to pause, scanning you over, "I don't know for sure, but I hear there's a place called Alexandria. It's good there, safe. Safe enough for a baby."
Your eyes darted down to Judith, still sleeping soundly against your chest. Your hand came up to rub against her hair -smoothing it down in place. She was your whole world now. If it was safe for her, it's where you'll go.
"Why aren't you there?" You questioned, "-If it's safe?"
"Looking for someone," they answered -briskly.
"Me too," you took a shaky breath in, your hands were shaking by your sides, "-I'm sorry about-"
They shook their head, cutting off your words, "It's your kid, I'd do the same."
You nodded once solidly, "Thanks."
They didn't say a word, and you decidedly moved forward. Keep moving.
They're alive, they're alive, they're alive-
You ended up near a few stores -walkers roaming around the strip.
You'd been keeping your eye out for signs, you saw them a lot. Different places offering safe havens, you hadn't seen one for Alexandria yet though. Had seen one for Terminus, and you had the brief thought that maybe Rick had been there. Were they okay? Did they come back from it?
You swallowed, not wasting time thinking about it. You couldn't, not anymore. You had Judith, you'd focus on Judith.
Inhaling, you roamed along the strip, pulling your axe into your hand again at the few walkers who roamed nearby. There wasn't enough that it was concerning, but you still didn't like them being anywhere near you. Especially with Judith held to your chest.
Quickly disposing of the one right by the door (lodging the blade through its head), you slowly made your way inside. It had a glass exterior, but all of it was smashed; it cracked under your feet, as you kept a hand on the back of Judith's head -just in case. The store, what looked to be some sort of convenience store, was raided pretty heavily only a few cans of what looked like alphabet soup on the food shelf.
Without hesitation, you took off your pack and shoved the cans into it. You didn't have much space, not with all of Jude's stuff, but you worked with what you had. Only finding two water bottles, you stashed one away for bottles and the other brought to your lips, before shoving it away.
You went through a few shops like that, some novelty shops with little trinkets and toys (you took just one for Judith), some snack shops where the aisles were completely cleaned out. And then, you stumbled upon a clothing store.
You stared at it, a little dumbfounded.
It was relatively untouched, sans the broken glass along the front. You figured that clothes were that important in the grand scheme of the apocalypse, so maybe it had just never been raided. Wanting to, one, get out of these clothes and, two, get some extra fabric for bandages, you neatly stepped inside.
You ended up finding an assortment of clothes, and for once you actually got to pick. Grabbing a bag off the floor that could hang across your chest, you filled it with fabric (including little onesies you'd found). And right then and there, you stripped down, slipping both new clothes on you and Judith.
It was refreshing, not really like a shower would be at this point but... close enough.
Slowly exiting, you took out two more walkers and continued out of the street -generally in the same direction the stranger had provided you with. You were just going by roads and by paths. Assumedly, if this place was safe, it would be some kind of substantial building.
Like the prison was, your mind chimed. You bit back the bile in your throat.
It went on that until night fell, there was no shelter nearby, so you continued on foot. Not that you'd sleep anyway, especially with Judith. You couldn't chance a wink.
It was the early morning then, and you felt the heaviness in your eyes. But you'd experienced much, much worse. You were kind of running a little on the adrenaline of everything. That being said, you had slept a little.
You'd found a house, boarded up. For safety reasons, you walked all the way up the stairs to the furthest bedroom and locked the door. You woke up to Judith crying and hadn't slept since.
What you hadn't expected, was to see two men walking along the road -crisply dressed and oddly clean. You hid behind a tree, peeking out at the two of them -they were talking about something.
"I think we'll give it another few days."
"How many?"
"Maybe two," one of the men spoke, "-we have to get back to Alexandria at some point-"
You stilled, hands brushing up against the bark of the tree. It scraped your fingers a moment.
You tailed them for a bit, watching what weapons they had (if they did) and figuring out what they were doing in general. They seemed to be limited to this area, like they were expecting something or maybe watching something, you didn't really know. They didn't say much.
You waited for them to completely let their guard down. Realistically, you could've taken them, probably. But you didn't chance anything, not with Judith; if you died, she would have nobody. Or at least, right now she would.
It was later in the day, lunch maybe based on the fact that they were eating. One's back to you, you realize this to be the perfect moment. You could take a hostage and demand answers.
Gently kissing Judith's head, you took a deep breath.
And you acted instinctively, pulling out your axe, and jumping behind him. With one fluid move, you pulled your axe in front of his neck. The vein, the vein, the vein-
The other man jumped, "Shit-"
"Don't move," you warned, and the man stalled in place -hands gently raised in the air.
He looked so unaffected from the world, how was he even-
"What do you want from us?" He nearly pleaded, and something in your resolve faltered but you stayed firm, "-Food? Weapons? We- Shit, take it all-"
You pressed your lips into a thin line, trying to control your emotion. Judith, Judith, Judith-
"Where is Alexandria?"
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valsdelulucorner · 7 hours
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obey me luke head cannons please
of course! just note that this will be strictly sfw and platonic. I wont be hearing any of the "oh, but he's like 1000 years old" stuff, he was the mentality, looks and attitude of a minor so this will be in no way a romantic
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He absolutely sees you as a older sibling and a parental figure, he trusts you alot. You don't call him chihuahua, you are interested in his interests, you give him genuine life advice and not just tell him to get someone else to do it for him. He deeply appreciates that you are nice to him and don't just treat him like that one kid brought along to a friends dinner party, you actually talk to him about his interests and make sure he has fun.
I feel like the reason people started calling him Chihuahua is because he growled at a demon one time to scare them off, he's not a big fan of demons and is quite scared to be without someone he trusts so when a demon came up to him, he started growling to try and show them that he isn't just a small angel. Lucifer found him doing this and scared the demons away for him, calling him a chihuahua while walking him back to Simeon
Luke is protective over you, he sees you as family and he doesn't like the idea that you just walk around scary demons all the time on your own. If he is out with simeon and sees you alone, he will invite you to come along with them both by saying that he just wants hang out with you, hiding the fact that he's scared you'll be attacked by a demon. He will insist he and Simeon walk you home, scolding the brothers for not keeping you company. How dare they not protect his older sibling, its insulting!
My boy is absolutely petrified after finding out you were killed by belphie, my poor boy will probably cry into your chest and beg you not to scare him like that again. Please give him a hug and say you'll stay with him, he will be absolutely heartbroken if you don't promise to be more careful. He will give you a enchanted bracelet or a pair of enchanted earrings that will protect you from attackers, the brothers will still be able to interact with you but if anyone tries to attack you again, the magic in the jewlery will protect you
Oh my lord the glares he gives belphie after he finds out he hurt you, he may be scared shitless of the avatar of sloth but he will make sure to pull you away from him for the first week or two after he killed you. As I said in my previous belphie fic, I hate the fact that we were so forgiving of him after he literally killed us. If you are scared of belphie or get tense whenever belphie gets close to you, Luke will probably try and help by bringing your attention elsewhere or just straight up leading you away from him
Loves cooking with and for you, baking is one of his favourite things to do so if he gets to do it with you, he is extremely happy! Baking competitions are a must with him, he gets competitive and tries his best to impress you. Let him win alot of the time, he gets so happy when he wins and he gets to share his treats with you!
Ok hear me out, if you have tattoos he would 100% want to colour them in. If you and the whole gang are having a nice dinner up in the human world, the waiters will see luke and probably give him some markers and a colouring in sheet. Your going to have to explain to him that kids in the human world get these stuff in restaurants to keep them entertained, he will be a tad bit annoyed but he wont complain. If you sit next to him and have a tattoo along your arm or hand, he will probably ask you if he could see what it looks like in colour. If you say yes, he is going to absolutely make sure he does a amazing job at making it look so pretty
He watches those gacha reaction and music videos, you cannot change my mind about this. He will even try to make one and show you afterwards, he would be so happy with himself
Thrown a cross at a lower demon once, i just feel like he's done that before
If you come down to the devildom as someone that makes little crochet creations, he will absolutely be over the moon if you make him a little beanie or a little plushie. He really wants you to teach him how to knit/crochet so you let him use your needles/hook and show him how to do it. He cant get his head around crocheting for the life of him but he is slowly learning how to knit, tell him he's doing a good job please! He will trade you his cooking for your little creations, making you the best sweets you've ever had while you give him a life size swan creation. If he makes you a little crochet buddy and it comes out really wonky, you better treasure that for the rest of your life!
If feel like when he gets too tired, he will just rest his head against your side and not say anything (my sister used to do this to my mum all the time when she was little). If you pick him up and carry him around, he will probably just fall asleep on your shoulder. He feels safe with you so its easy for him to just fall asleep against you. He gets to experience the out body experience of falling asleep in the car and then waking up in bed
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Luke is so adorable, he is my son and I love him. Sorry if i wrote him alittle younger then i expected, but i love the idea that sometimes he has that childish excitement and amazement to the world. Thank you for requesting this Anon, this was alot of fun!
Who should i do next?
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mustainegf · 2 days
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can you do James and a girl having sex and its her first time doing anything and he teaches her how to touch herself and then they have gentle sex
I’m gonna be so honest, it’s not exactly gentle… but it’s cute I promise !!
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"Jamie, I'm scared.." I mumbled, looking the boy in the eyes. His expression softened immediately, pulling my body to his. We were both without any clothes, and this was my first time doing anything.
"I've never..."
"It's okay," he assured me, brushing his lips over mine. "This will be easy, and if you don't like it, we can stop." He said that as if it were the most normal thing to say.
"But it'll hurt?" I asked, and he nodded. "It might sting, but it won't hurt, I promise. I'll make sure of it." With those words, I was instantly calmed. It had been so long since I'd felt safe.
"Have you ever played with yourself before?" He asked softly, laying my back to his chest.
I shook my head with a slight whimper. "Oh, that's okay sweetheart, I'll show you," he kissed my temple, his hand finding mine.
Me slowly guided my hand down my stomach and my breath hitched. "So lucky, I get to be the first to make you feel good," he cooed.
James pulled my fingers in between my legs, guiding them on my throbbing clit.
I flinched at the new sensation. "Go ahead, I'm here to help," he whispered, helping me rub myself.
The feeling was unlike anything I'd ever felt before.
My chest tightened, every nerve ending in my body igniting from one simple touch. "Like this," he guided me, moving my fingers in delicate circles.
He helped me for a few minutes until I found my own rhythm. "Good girl, now close your eyes," he commanded, and I did just that. "Let your mind wander, think about what feels good," he said.
I flicked my wrist slightly, working my clit as he helped. "Can you keep doing that for me? I need to stretch you out, get you ready for me. That okay?" He asked slowly, his fingers leaving mine and trailing down to my dripping slit.
I nodded, too busy thinking about what I was touching, where he was going next. My hands moved faster on their own accord, needing more stimulation. I bit my lip as my body started to hum.
James circles his fingers around my wetness before two of his fingers slipped in.
I gasped, my eyes flying open at the intrusion, but his face was gone, only a blurry haze left in front of me. I wanted to look away, close my eyes, but I couldn't, it was too much.
I tried to move my hips away from his invading fingers, but he kept me still. "Relax, relax," he whispered into my ear. "You're doing great, just like that," he praised me.
Then he added another finger, stretching me further. I closed my eyes again, trying to focus on my own fingers, but the discomfort was too much.
"I know honey, just breathe I've gotta stretch you a bit," he hushed.
He curled his fingers, slowly pulling them in an out as I focused on my clit,
"You're doing so good for your first time, baby," James smiled, his fingers pumping into me.
I writhed as we both played with me, god his touch was way better than mine.
I squeezed my thighs together, my orgasm bursting through me, my hips bucking off the bed. "Fuck yes, that's it," he groaned, pounding into me even harder.
I came undone, tears streaming down my cheeks as my orgasm wracked my body. James held me tighter, whispering sweet nothings into my ear.
After a while, I slowed down and stopped, still holding myself, shaking.
"You ready for my dick, baby?" He smirked, sitting up as I collapsed onto his bed.
I could only muster a nod. If his fingers felt that's good, I couldn't imagine how good his cock would.
I wiped the streams from my cheeks, a little embarrassed that It so good it brought me to tears.
"Don't worry about that. You are perfect, so pretty." He kissed me softly, running his hand down my arm before returning to my breasts. "Jamie, please be gentle.." I pleaded breathlessly.
"Of course, darling," James whispered, sitting himself up to hover over me.
"I promise I will take care of you, okay?" His face was right in front of mine, those gorgeous blue eyes peering at me with a soft expression. "Breathe in," he said, looking down at his cock, which was pulsing with the need to be inside me.
I swallowed hard and looked down between us, taking him in. "Now exhale, and I'm gonna push in," he ordered. I released my breath slowly, feeling his head push against me, one inch, then two, three, four. All the way until he bottomed out. The full 8 inches.
"Oh, fuck yes," he growled, holding me in place as he rocked back and forth, letting me adjust. "Holy hell you're fucking tight." He ran his hand up and down my side, brushing his thumb over my hip bone.
He continued to slowly thrust, his eyes on my face as if he were waiting for something. "Are you okay?" He asked after a few minutes. "Yeah," I managed to croak out, the tears coming back to my eyes.
I was going to need to learn to speak again. He chuckled, kissing my forehead. "Okay, good. If you tell me to stop or want to pause, I will. I'm not gonna keep going if you're uncomfortable."
I whined with a shake of my head. "No, don't stop, it's so g-good..." I forced out.
James began his thrusting, forcing me to grab his toned arms, whimpering continuously.
"Such... such a good girl," he grinned.
I was seeing stars, James effortlessly fucking into me.
"Tell me how good it feels sweetheart, do you like my dick inside of you?" He growled.
"It's so good, so good..." I moaned, lost in the haze.
I had no idea what was happening, but it was wonderful, I just wanted more.
More of this man inside of me. "That's it, tell me how you feel, tell me what you need," James coaxed.
"I need more, more, more of you," I whimpered, still holding him tightly. "Fuck yeah," he groaned, picking up speed. "God you're amazing, your pussy is so good. So tight." I bit my lip, blushing at his words.
"Look at me," he commanded, and when I did, I saw the intensity in his gaze. "Darlin', look at me," he growled, running his fingers through my hair, tilting my head up. "Please," I begged. "Please what? "
Tears were streaming down my cheeks, ever my feeling was so good, so overwhelming. I finally choked out the words. "Please... harder.."
And oh my god, he delivered. Roughly slamming into me, hitting all those places that made me scream even louder.
I knew he was going much too fast for my first time, but I couldn't bring myself to stop him, I loved it far too much.
I could feel the same knot I felt earlier, and I knew I was close to cumming.
"James! James, I'm gonna cum!" I pleaded, gripping tighter to his body as he pounded his cock into me.
"Yes, baby, yes. Cum for me, cum on my cock," he grunted. My orgasm hit me hard, squeezing his cock, milking every drop of his come from him. He let go of himself, filling me completely.
We both laid there panting, our hearts racing. He reached up and wiped away my tears. "You alright sweetheart?" I nodded, unable to get any words out yet. He chuckled, brushing my hair out of my face.
"You just about tore me in half..." I panted with a chuckle. Wondering why I hadn't had sex earlier, let alone touch myself.
I really needed to reevaluate my life. James pulled me close to his chest, kissing my head softly. "Don't worry about it. You'll learn eventually."
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honeyangelkiwi · 3 days
Text
Coachella Weekend 2 | H.S.
Plot: A bet is made on whether Harry will address his album being leaked during his second set at Coachella…
Sexual content: fingeringish (f receiving), grinding, teasing, subrry
Word count: 3.1k
I started writing this the day after this performance and then set it aside and got distracted haha. I don’t remember exactly what he said on stage, and quite frankly I don’t care to look it up. You’ll get the gist, it’s only a few words here and there. Maybe posting this here will finally get me to finish the second part.
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I wasn’t sure if he was going to be able to top last weekend. His performance for weekend one completely blew me away. He wouldn’t let me see anything, saying it had to be just as much of a surprise to me as it would be for everyone else, which was very annoying. I’ll admit though, it made the performance so much better.
I almost forgot how much of a flirt he can be on stage. The little smirks, smiles, and not so subtle touches that drove me to so much pent up frustration that I jumped right on him when he came off the stage. I have a feeling tonight will be much more exciting.
The vibe from the crowd tonight is so much better. It’s been vibrant and buzzing all day and we all know why. Weekend two is nothing but harries. The lineup hadn’t been announced yet when weekend one tickets went on sale. However, as soon as the lineup dropped and everyone realized H was headlining, they came in full force. Nothing impresses me more than his fans and their dedication to him.
That leads us up to right now. H and I are sitting in his trailer in the artist village just lounging around while everyone else is out watching artists across the site. We wanted to stay back though, knowing he would get too much attention no matter where we were out there.
We’re sitting on the couch, watching the piece of shit YouTube live stream, but not really paying any attention to it. He’s laying back against the arm of the couch with one leg up on the couch and the other on the floor, my back pressed to his chest while he rubs soft circles into my left hip.
Both of us lay in robes, too lazy to get fully dressed even though he is on in two hours. That wouldn’t matter anyways because he, again, won’t let me see what he’s going to be wearing tonight. Knowing Lambert and Alessandro it will be nothing short of amazing and mouth watering.
“What do you think you’re doing H?” I question when I feel his left hand start to pull my robe open a bit and slip under it. He doesn’t say anything and continues his hand up, gripping the thin band of my barely existent panties.
Just the feeling of the pads of his fingertips on my skin heats up my body like a wildfire. I know the game he’s playing, he does it often. The game where he loves to work us both up, teasing not just me, but both of us, to the point it almost physically hurts. Just for him to go on stage and act like a whore in front of the world.
The result usually ends with me begging him to fuck me as soon as he gets off of stage, dragging him to the nearest secluded…ish spot so he can finger fuck me until we can get somewhere more private. He may act like a whore on stage, but behind closed doors we’re both filthy.
I gasp sharply when his fingers dip down to brush my clit lightly. My hips involuntarily shifting up to chase his fingers when he starts pulling his hand away. “Harry, please don’t do this tonight. I have a feeling I won’t be able to handle it.” I plead softly, knowing that since he’s already started I don’t want him to stop.
I feel his chest move as he chuckles at me. “C’mon babe, I know you don’t want me to stop. You were wet before I even started.” He whispers into my ear. His lips brushing up and down my neck with his breath tickling me, sending goosebumps erupting across my entire body.
I let my head fall back onto his shoulder, exposing more of myself to him. His lips start planting soft kisses up and down my neck, stopping to suck a bruise where it meets my shoulder.
His left hand moves up my body to my breasts, taking a handful while his free hand pulls the tie of my robe and lets it fall open, completely exposing me to him. I only had on panties, and a shiver ran through my body when my hot skin was met with the cool air conditioning of the trailer.
While his left hand starts playing with my freed nipples his right pulls my underwear to the side, and he runs his fingers from my opening up to my clit, spreading the arousal around between my legs. I couldn’t help the whimper that fell from my lips at the all of the stimulation he was giving me across my body. Enough to start a knot forming in my belly, but not enough to be chasing a release.
The soft sounds coming from me cause his hips to shift up and grind into my backside, allowing me to feel how hard he was from the little bit of work he was doing. Knowing this is what he loves doing I open my eyes to glance at the clock and see he has to leave shortly.
Mad at myself that I let him play his game I grab his hand that's still running up and down my heat and press his fingers to my clit, forcing them to rub in quick, harsh circles. Immediately my eyes shut again and a loud moan fell from my lips, drowning myself in the pressure that I needed to push me towards my end.
Harry, being the man he is, let me do what I wanted for all of a minute before pulling his hands away from my body. I wanted to scream, but before I could he was already flipping me over to straddle his lap, slamming his lips to mine.
I couldn’t help the moan that escaped passed my lips and into his mouth, the way he tastes never getting old to me. His hands grip tightly onto my hips, pulling them further into his lap, allowing me to feel how hard he is through the little barrier between us.
I weave my fingers into his hair and tug on the roots as I roll my hips into his to get some more friction. I know he can feel the wetness seeping through my panties. The slippery fluid dampened his briefs and surely let him feel how much he’s worked me up.
He groans into my mouth, pushing his tongue into mine and licking into it like he’s searching for more of the taste. A hand comes up to the back of my neck pulling me into him more and he obscenely starts sucking my tongue between his lips.
He pulls his mouth from mine and moves his face into my neck, pressing hot, open mouthed kisses, and starting to suck a bruise into my sweet spot. “Baby, please.” I beg, knowing and not knowing what I’m asking for.
My head is so far into the clouds that I don’t realize he’s pulled his mouth off of my skin until he’s gently pushing me off him. As he stands up he looks down at me with a smirk I could slap right off his face.
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me H!!” I huffed angrily at him. I know I’m more angry at myself for falling into his trap again, but I could help it. He’s irresistible.
“Sorry babe. It’s about time for me to go get changed and make sure Lizzo gets her coat for tonight.” He shrugs like he hasn’t also worked himself up. I raise an eyebrow at him and glance down at his hard cock before looking back up at him.
He just smiles at me, popping those dimples out laughing. “Nothing I can’t take care of love.” And truly, fuck you, Harry Styles. As I’m about to snark back some quirky comment an idea pops into my head, and now I’m the one smirking.
“Are you gonna mention the leaks tonight?” I ask and watch his eyebrows furrow. “I am, why?” He responds back, confused because we’ve already talked about this yesterday.
“I bet you won’t. You’ll get up there and chicken out.” I taunt him. He’s too predictable. I know what I’m doing. If he wants to play games, then we’ll play games.
“Babe, I’ve told you already. I’m going to bring it up. I would never be rude to them, but I want to say something.” He sighs, rolling his eyes. He’s probably tired of me bringing it up, but I know he won't say anything. He would never make his fans feel bad, even if they did listened to the leaks.
“How about if you say something you fuck me and if you don’t… I fuck you tonight.” I say with the biggest smirk on my face. I know Harry can’t turn this down. Mister cocky and confident until he’s the one under me.
The shock on his face is something I wish I could have gotten a picture of. He stands speechless for a minute, mouth falling open and snapping shut a few times before he finally answers… or whimpers. From that alone I know I’ll be winning this bet, but it’ll be fun to see how he attempts to win anyways.
He walks up to me with a big smile on his face, like he didn’t just let it slip how much he would like to be the one bent over tonight. However, I also know he can’t deny a good competition between us. “Looks like we have a deal baby. I hope you’re ready for what I’ve already got planned.” He says and gives me a soft peck on the lips.
He steps away and turns towards the bathroom, undoubtedly to take care of the issue he caused himself and to get dressed and meet Lambert. I sit myself back down on the couch, thinking about the ways in which I will have him begging for me.
I’m pulled from my thoughts as he comes back fully clothed… kind of, in small shorts with a tee shirt layered over a long sleeve shirt. His hair is hidden under a bucket hat and his clip firmly attached to his shirt. It never ceases to amaze me how good he looks in something so simple.
Without any shame I slowly drag my eyes down his body, letting him see the look I’m giving him. When I get back up to his face he simply smirks, steps up to me and gives me a kiss to the forehead. “I’ll see you in an hour, love.” He states and heads out the door.
********
Harry Lambert and Alessandro have really outdone themselves this weekend. The pink leather, the cherries and strawberries… and the initials on Harry’s ass have me ready to drop everything and suck his dick right on stage in front of everyone.
He truly has no business looking as good as he does. The way his abs have been flexing as he dances around on stage is disgustingly attractive. During Carolina he came over to the side of the side stage where VIP was and gave me a big, teasing, cheesy grin.
“This is for you baby!” He yells at me. I couldn’t hear him since he yelled it away from the mic, but I could make out what he said. He does that often when he’s on stage. He turns around and gives his focus back to the crowd and continues on into Woman.
After Woman the high energy dies down a bit as Elin, Sarah, and Nyoh come up to the front of the stage to sing Boyfriends with Harry. His little speech last night ran through my head and made me laugh.
He steps up to the mic with his guitar and clears his throat. He takes a glance over at me and smirks, raising his brows playfully. I gulped nervously because I really didn’t think he would be saying anything. I catch Sarah nudging Elin and giving her a look with wide eyes. I guess I’m not the only one surprised by him.
“Respectful kings and queens…” he starts and trails off a bit as the crowd goes insane by the way he addresses them. As they continue screaming I see it. The hesitation flashes across his face and he looks over at me again with wide eyes and a nervous twitch of the lips. I feel the smirk spread across my face realizing that, even though there is still half of the show to go, I’ve won this bet.
He visibly gulps and shakes his head chuckling. “We’re going to play a new song for you, one that I’ve only performed once. Here’s Boyfriends.” He spares another glance my way, this one being much darker with his face on fire.
I quick a look towards Sarah and Elin and see them trying not to laugh and I know for sure that they had a bet on if he would say something or not also. The rest of the show goes by fairly quickly and the anticipation to get my hands on him has been growing and spreading like wildfire through my body.
The stage goes red and the old Kiwi intro starts. I am so glad he brought it back because there is no other feeling of the build up during this. He goes to grab a water bottle and all of the fans start going crazy knowing what’s to come.
He looks at me as he comes running down the catwalk, smirking and pointing at me. “You better not throw that water on me Harry!” I shout at him. I know he can’t hear because of the in ears, but he can read my lips. He simply laughs and turns to throw it on the fans opposite of me.
As the bridge comes around I take it as my cue to head to the side stage to meet him as he runs off. 10 minutes later and he’s finishing Sign of The Times and running off stage. As he approaches me I open my arms and let him pick me up, swinging us in a circle.
“I still can’t believe that was my first festival!” He shouts over the still screaming crowd. He leans in to kiss me but I pull back. When I look up to his face and see him pouting I chuckle at him. “I think you need to go shower and change baby, you’ve got a long night ahead of you.”
His face drops even more, eyebrows raising and lips parted slightly, wet and shining from having licked them. “Oh haha, you remember that little bet.” He speaks lowly, rubbing the back of his neck and avoiding eye contact.
“Mhm baby, I do remember. It seems like the band thought the same thing.” I say laughing and sliding my arms down to his hips, giving them a squeeze. “What happened? Why’d you back out at the last minute?” I ask, rubbing circles into his ferns.
“I don’t know. Just kind of choked up I guess.” He shyly mutters and I can’t help but give him a quick peck to the lips. He may seem overly confident on stage, but he's still just a cute little baby most of the time. He smiles down at me and kisses my forehead, wrapping his hands around me to pull me in for a hug.
For a moment we just stand like that backstage, embracing each other, forgetting that there are 50 people around us running around to deconstruct the stage and get everything set up for tomorrow. His face is buried in my hair, his sweat is sticking to my skin and he smells, but I don’t complain. Moments like these are meant to just live in for a bit.
After a few moments I slip my hands from his hips to his plump ass and give a firm squeeze. The whimper that came from his lips was low enough that only I heard, and it went straight to my core. I could feel him harden against my lower stomach already.
“Go get showered baby. Be a good boy and wait for me on the bed naked.” I whisper into his ear. His hips shift and rub against me and he moans softly, only for me to hear. “Hm, maybe you purposefully didn’t say anything because you wanted me to fuck you tonight.” I say to him, my voice having dipped down and dripping in honey.
“And if I did?” He says and steps back with a smirk. I cock an eyebrow at him, glancing down to the bulge in his pants. He unashamedly looks down and rubs his hand over himself. “I would say you better do what I say if you want my cock in your ass tonight.” I snapped at him.
His mouth drops open and his hand snaps back to his side. He turns around and starts walking away, but not before looking back at me with eyes blown in lust to tell me loves me. I look around and catch eyes with Sarah and Elin and see them laughing, knowing they saw the encounter.
“See you guys tomorrow!” I yell over to them and we all share a look. They know how H and I are. Not by choice initially, but when Harry came into rehearsal the first time a few months back with red cheeks and a limp, the whole band kind of guessed and teased him about it.
They waved back and I turned to make my way back to the trailer. Taking my time knowing how worked up he’s gonna be by the time I get there.
bully me to finish the second part
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lunajay33 · 3 days
Text
Change Part.6
•🎀🩰🩷•
Summary: Y/n is a loner but loves ballet but her family doesn’t have enough money for her to dance at the studio, Daryl is a redneck who hates people and prefers bikes, until one day these two run into eachother and their lives change drastically, will Daryl toughen her up? Will y/n soften Daryl? Or both? How will things go when people start coming back from the dead
Pairing: Young Daryl Dixon x f!reader
A/n: This is going to be a series, it’s gonna start with how they met eachother and their lives before the apocalypse, eventually it’ll blend with twd story line!!
Part.5
•Masterlist•
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It had been a week since the incident with the walker, Daryl refused to let me go out alone again and I didn’t blame him I didn’t want to be alone either it was too risky, it wasn’t just my life in danger, I had a baby to worry about and I refused to leave Daryl alone in a world like this, I rolled over in bed admiring his sleeping form, his hair all crazy, I love him so much and the fact that our family was just about to begin tore something from me that I always dreamed about
“Mornin” he grumbled as I ran my hand through his hair
“Sorry did I wake you?”
“Nah I was up a while ago just waiting for ya”
“Mmmm” I didn’t know if it was the pregnancy hormones or what but my mood was at an all time low and I didn’t wanna drag Daryl down too
“What’re ya thinking about” he asked as he squeezed my hip
“Nothing”
“Angel I know ya like the back of my hand, I know when yer over thinking”
I sighed hating that he’s always been able to crack me out of my shell he shown me time and time again that I can trust him with anything, he’ll we’re having a baby together why shouldn’t I tell him
“Just been thinking where my family are now, I know I haven’t talked to them in like a year but I still wonder if they’re even alive”
“The last time you talked to them they called ya a selfish slut, ya shouldn’t worry about them, all they’ve ever done was hurt ya angel, we got our own family now, one that’ll love ya more than they ever could” Daryl wasn’t much of a big speech kinda guy but when he knew I needed comforting he pushed that side of him away to be there for me
“Yeah I guess you’re right, like usual” I said laughing as he pulled me closer so I could lay my head in his chest
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I was sat in the living room curled in a blanket reading the new twilight book hearing the rain patter against the windows, the smell of a roast in the oven that Daryl had put in, right when I got to the part where Edward was leaving Bella the phone rang, Daryl at my side handed it over scoffing at the caller ID
Caller ID: Jackson L/N
“This can’t be good” I sighed clicking answer and putting it on speaker
“Hello?”
“You need to come home” not even a hi or nothing
“Why? None of you have bothered to contact me in months what is it this time?”
“Dad lost his job, mom and dad need money for rent” I could see the anger written all over Daryl’s face
“Jackson I have my own life now, I can’t be helping you guys out ever time you need money, I have bills of my own and I don’t wanna waste my money on people who don’t even care about me”
“Are you serious right now?” He asked enraged
“Why can’t you help, you’re the one that got that football scholarship, I had to work my way through university and I’m still paying off student loans, plus Daryl and I have to pay for our house and car and motorcycle”
“You know what this is done, you’re out of this family for good this time, mom and dad should’ve gotten rid of you when they had the chance you selfish slut” the phone disconnected signalling he hung up
I looked at Daryl feeling my chest tighten, I never wanted this I was never the golden child in their eyes, I only ever felt like I mattered when Daryl came into my life
“He’s lucky this was over the phone or I’d beat him into the ground” Daryl groaned rubbing my legs over the blanket
“Why am I never good enough for them?”
“Ya got that wrong Angel, they ain’t good enough for you”
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As I sat outside eating breakfast Daryl and Merle got ready for the day, Merle was going to Atlanta with some people from the camp and Daryl was going out hoping to find a deer he’s been tracking for a while
“I gotta go now Angel” Daryl said as he stung his crossbow over his shoulder
“But I don’t want you to go” I whined getting up to wrap my arms around him
“I know but I’ll be back later this evening just try and stay around the other, don’t want another problem like last week” he said placing a kiss to my cheek
“Fine just promise me you’ll be safe out there, that you’ll come back to me”
“Promise”
He picked up some extra arrows and disappeared through the tree line
“Ya got him wrapped around yer lil finger don’t ya” Merle mocked
“Come on Merle can’t you just be happy that he’s happy, I know you don’t like me much but you’re my family now and I’m yours, plus I’m carrying your niece or nephew can’t we just be cordial for once” I said exhausted from his constant bickering
“Don’t matter ta me ya got knocked up, ya made my brother soft and yer gonna see ya ruined his life” he picked up his weapons and left the camp site leaving with the Atlanta crew
“God when do I catch a break?” I sat back down in the camp chair not noticing someone sit next to me until they talked
“You okay sweetie?” It was Lori
“It’s just Merle, always a pain in my ass, just been thinking about what’s gonna happen now with the baby and everything I’m just scared” I looked at here to see if she’d give me advice but here eyes were wide
“What?” I asked confused
“You’re pregnant?”
“Yeah, I guess we never really mentioned it”
“You know when I found out I was pregnant with Carl, I was a wreck I was young and scared and didn’t know what to do with myself, but the moment I saw him curled up in my arms so little without a care in the world, I knew what I had to do to protect him from harm, everything will be okay” she smiled patting my back
“Thanks, that helps a bit I just wish it wasn’t in these circumstances”
“How far along are you?”
“About 4 months now, I’ve been taking my prenatals and everything”
“Well I’m always here if you have questions about the baby or changes you go through, but I have to go cut Carls hair”
Something clicked, maybe since this was a new start for Daryl and I and with the baby in this new world maybe I needed a new look, something to liven my spirits
“Umm Lori, would you be up for cutting my hair too!” I asked as I ran up next to her as she walked towards her camp
“I’d love to”
I sat next to Shane as Lori worked on Carls hair, he couldn’t stop complaining but it was adorable
“One day you’re gone wish you had her cutting your hair” Shane said laughing
“Doubt it”
“Trust me Carl, one day you’ll crave to be have these moments again with your mom, it may not seem like it but you will” I said seeing a little smile on his rosy cheeks
“Alright you’re all done” Lori said as she swiped off his extra hair on his shirt
I sat down in front of her as she wrapped a towel around my shoulders
“Alright how short do you want it?” My hair was down to my mid lower back
“How about just below my shoulder”
“That’s quit a chop”
“Well I need it”
She held my hair back and it a split second it was chopped, she straightened out some uneven pieces and it was done
“Well what do you think?”
“It’s really nice Mrs. Dixon!” Carl said with a beaming smile
“Well thank you but you can call me y/n sweetie” he was adorable I hope my child is as sweet as him
“It suits you perfect dear”
“Thank you! I should go clean some clothes done at the quarry, if you need anything I’ll be down there!”
I spent most of the evening down at the quarry cleaning and scribbling mine and daryls dirty clothes, laying them out on some rocks to let them dry, meanwhile dipping my feet in the cool water helping to sooth my ankles that have been getting a bit swollen
I looked around hoping no one was near, I haven’t been able to get a good proper bath in a while so I stripped down my clothes leaving only my bra and panties, submerging myself in the lake floating belly up watching the clouds pass by just like the time Daryl took me here
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“Daryl Dixon did you drag me out here just to see me naked?” I asked smirking as he started taking off his shoes and pants
“Come on it’s nice out yer gonna love it” he said as he was stepping into the lake
I bit my lip feeling that thrill shoot through me, I stripped to just my panties and bra, I walked over taking his hand
“Aren’t you going to take your shirt off?”
“Ya sure?” I knew he was embarrassed about his scars but they weren’t his fault
“You know they don’t bother me, I love you for you, not what happen to you” I said squeezing his hand reassuringly
He lifted it over his head and threw it back over to my clothes pill
“Come on Dixon show me how great this’ll be, better not let me drown” I laughed as I dragged him in
“Still can’t believe yer my girl”
“And I’ll be your girl until you’re sick of me”
“Never”
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“Well well well what do we have here?” I heard behind me as I pulled on my clothes after drying off
“What do you want Ed?” I groaned feeling that touch of fear he instilled in the women of the camp
“Showing yourself down here for the whole camp, you’re asking for it” he said stepping closer
“Leave me alone Ed”
“Ya ain’t got your man around who’s gonna stop me?”
“Don’t you touch me or you’ll be sorry”
He stepped closer squeezing my jaw now face to face
“Like I said ain’t no one gonna stop me” he said as his other hand started to wander down my arm
Before he could get any further he was ripped away Shane throwing him to the ground
“Touch her or anyone else again Ed and I’ll beat ya to death I swear, come on y/n” I gathered up all the clothes I washed and ran to Shane’s side as he lead me safely back to the camp
“Thanks, I didn’t know anyone was around”
“Ain’t your fault, Ed’s one sick man you stay away from him, stay with the group until Daryl or Merle gets back”
I sat down next to Amy folding up the laundry still to shaken up to have conversation that’s when a car alarm was ringing around the quarry, the group was back and it felt a little better knowing Merle would be here while Daryl was gone, Shane shut off the car alarm and others filtered out of a cargo truck
Lori and Carl had their moment with their “back from the dead” father and husband which was incredibly heart warming but then I realized something
“Where’s Merle?”
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Please please please give me some ideas for this story going forward🩷 How should I incorporate the ballerina story line into the new world??:)
Taglist: @pinchofthetwd @bigbaldheadname @strawberrykiwisdogog @h0n3y-l3m0n05 @l0kilaufeys0n7 @deansapplepie @severelykinky @tesfayera @daryldixmedown @secretsicanthideanymore @mordilwen-of-mirkwood @secretsicanthideanymore @superbowlisgay @pollito-chicken @minnie-min @writer-ann-artist @twisteduniverse5 @heidiland05 @lettersfromyourlove
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ladykailitha · 3 hours
Text
Sweet Home Indiana Part 2
Hello! My elbow was doing better this morning and then I took a nap and hurt it again somehow...(head desk) so I'm still putting out my backlog without being able to build up more because of it, hopefully it gets better before I run out of backlog because that would be embarrassing.
Here we get some backstory as Eddie strolls back into Steve's life.
Pt 1
****
When Robin came into open the store she found Steve wearing the clothes he had been wearing the night before. None of the bread dough was rising, none of the cookies were baking having not even been made, the cakes were out on the cooling racks instead in the freezer to chill enough to have frosting put on them.
He was curled up next to their large stand mixer dubbed the Beast, cradling his sides like he was trying to hold in his innards.
“Steve...” she called out gently.
Steve looked up at her and her heart broke. His eyes were red and puffy, his cheeks tear-stained and blotchy. Snot ran down his nose and pooled on his upper lip.
She sighed and then turned around. She hunted around for a marker and a piece of paper. She wrote that they were closed for the day and hung it up outside the front door. She locked it behind her and went to go sit down next her best friend.
Steve laid his head on her shoulder and sighed.
“Eddie’s getting married.”
Robin had to force herself from jerking her head around to look at him because he needed her support more than he needed her ire in that moment.
“Who do I have to kill?” she muttered darkly, reaching up to run her fingers through his hair soothingly.
Steve barked out a bitter laugh. “She’s this hot shot legal assistant from Barbados. Like I didn’t even know that was a country until I looked it up. It’s in the Caribbean. Did you know that?”
“I did.”
Robin blinked for a minute. “Wait...she?”
Steve just shrugged. “People change, Robs. Don’t make it a thing.”
She bit her lip and worried it between her teeth. Because fucking hell she wanted to make a big deal out of it. Someone should make a big deal out of it.
“Nancy’s back in town visiting her family,” she said instead. “Holly’s graduating next week.”
Steve threw his arms in the air. “Great! I’m being invaded by my ex. Just put me out of my misery now, Robs. I don’t think I can take it.”
Robin smacked his arms. “No. There will be no killing of the Steve. If anyone wants to make it your problem, then they’re going to have a problem with me, got it?”
“Thanks, Robbie,” he murmured, running his fingers through his hair. “Like the way he went about it was such complete shit. Like how dare he think that a simple annulment is going to get him off abandoning me for fame and fortune and then not coming back when it fell through?”
Robin’s head did whip around that time. “He fucking did what?”
Steve sighed and waved at the papers in the trash. She got up and picked them up. She read through them with increasing ire. Her hands started to shake and her face burned with indignation.
“Screw killing her,” she hissed. “I’m going to kill him. Just as soon as I find his scrawny ass. How dare he?”
He huffed out a bitter laugh. “I hunted down his number and called him out on it. I told him if he was so desperate to be free of me he had to tell me to my face.”
“So what you’re telling me...” Robin said slowly, “is that your not just being invaded by one ex, but most likely two exes. And like your two biggest heartbreaks ever?”
Steve got to his feet and lopped over to her. “That about sums it up, yeah. I know you closed the store, but I still have to make Mrs. Laurence’s cake. She’s supposed to pick it up at 3pm.”
She patted him on the shoulder and tossed away the papers. “Let’s make this cake. We can’t disappoint Mrs. Laurence.”
Steve and Robin went through and tossed everything that couldn’t be salvaged. Steve pulled the two chocolate sheet cakes out of the freezer and set them on the decorating table. He went into the walk-in freezer and got out the two large tubs of frosting; one chocolate buttercream and the other vanilla buttercream.
Robin pulled out the food dyes and began mixing the colors they would need for the cake. Steve went and grabbed one final thing from the fridge before closing the door. A raspberry filling.
He got to work starting with a crumb coating and then took the purple colored frosting from Robin and began covering the whole cake. Once it was completely covered he started adding design elements and darker purple flowers.
Then he passed it over to Robin who wrote “Happy 50th Anniversary” on the top.
All in all it had taken about an hour. Then he called up Mrs. Laurence and told her that Robin would be delivering the cake today because the shop was closed. He didn’t explain why and she didn’t ask. Mostly she was just grateful that it was going to be delivered.
Then Steve got to work preparing for tomorrow. Things like cookies and pastries that could stay in the fridge over night were made first. Then he started on the thing he was most famous for: his brownies.
He had four kinds, a triple chocolate that was dark chocolate brownie with milk chocolate frosting and chunks. The second one was a peanut butter marble with fudge drizzled over it and topped with chopped peanuts. The third was a cheesecake and caramel that was super popular with the high school kids. But the most famous, the one every raved about was the mint brownie. It had mint in the brownie itself, mint frosting, and fudge and crumbled brownie bits covering the top.
The Monster as it was fondly called by Steve’s customers could turn even the most fervent of mint haters over to the dark side, it was that good.
Finally everything was ready for tomorrow.
When Robin came back from delivering the cake, she sat down at the decorating table and leaned on her elbows, clasping her hands together.
“When are you going to get some people into help you?” she asked gently. “You know I won’t be here forever and you can’t keep doing it on your own.”
Steve who had just finished cleaning everything up looked up at her with his big puppy dog eyes. “You’re going to leave me?” he asked with a pout.
She slapped at his arm. “You know that I’m heading to college in the fall, just as soon as I pick which one I’m going to. You’ll have all summer to train a couple of people to take my place.”
He sighed. “I know. I’ll think about it after I deal with my exes this week.”
Robin rolled her eyes. “Fine. But I also get to interview these new peeps and make sure they’re good enough.”
“Deal!” he said and they shook hands.
****
Because they were closed the day before Steve had a line of customers lining up on the sidewalk when he turned the closed sign to read “OPEN”.
Robin and he got to work helping all the customers.
It was fine up until Mrs. O’Donnell came in absolutely bitching about how she always gets her bread on Wednesdays and he knows that he should have been open for her. Especially since Mrs. Laurence got her cake, so Steve should have been able to open for her to get her bread.
She had completely bottlenecked the whole line. Robin was working as hard as she could to keep up with demand on her side of the counter, but Steve could see she was starting to falter.
“Enough!” Steve barked and the whole shop went silent. “I had a personal matter come up that couldn’t have been avoided and Mrs. Laurence had paid for her cake well in advance which is why she still got it. And unless you don’t want to get your precious bread ever again, because I have banned you, then you better stop harassing me, get your damn bread, and get the fuck out of my store.”
Mrs. O’Donnell let out a small “eep!” before paying for her bread and leaving quickly. There was a small amount of clapping and Steve grinned.
“Next, please,” he said and the next customer came up.
Things went smoother after that.
Two hours later, the rush had ended and Robin and Steve worked on restocking the shelves.
“You always were a bitch, Steve,” a voice said from the corner on the shop were there were a couple of tables people could use to eat their tasty delights. “But watching you take down that bitch O’Donnell was like poetry in motion.”
Steve stiffened, hands clenching on the tray of brownies he was carrying. He slowly turned around and sure enough in all his black clothes, leather jacket, and many chained glory was Eddie Munson.
He gritted his teeth and slid the tray home in the display case. He pulled the towel off his shoulder and wiped off his hands. “Nice to see you finally got tired of running.”
Eddie got to his feet and moved to step toward the counter when a little bell went off announcing a customer.
In walked this soft round woman with a bright smile. She didn’t even notice Eddie standing there, she just walked right up to Steve.
“Mrs. Laurence!” Steve greeted warmly. “How was the cake yesterday?”
Mrs. Laurence smiled. “It was lovely as always, dear. Nothing but rave reviews from all.”
He smiled at her fondly. “I’m glad. So what can I get you today?”
She tapped her finger on her lips as scanned over the case. “I’ll take a half dozen raspberry truffles and a monster please.”
Steve’s smile turned into a grin. “You’re just in time, I just finished a fresh batch of monsters just before you came in.”
“Lucky me indeed,” she said with a giggle. “They are so much better fresh. Not like your peanut butter ones. They taste better after a day or two to really set the peanut butter.”
Steve laughed as he packed her order. “I always feel like the opposite, give the brownie bites on top time to get chewy and they’re...” he did the chef’s kiss. “But I like how gooey the fresh peanut butter ones are fresh out of the oven.”
Mrs. Laurence laughed too. “Agree to disagree, dear.” She paid and turned around.
“Oh my goodness!” she huffed. “I didn’t even see you there, you must think me rude just jumping the line like that.”
Eddie shook his head. “I don’t think you’ve got a rude bone in your body. Jeffy takes after you that way.”
She tilted her head. “Eddie?”
Eddie nodded mutely, lips pressed into a grim line. She swept him up in a hug.
“My Jeff didn’t say anything about you coming to town,” she admonished her youngest child.
Eddie just shook his head. “It was a last minute decision. Just something I have to take care of.”
She looked back at Steve who had his head tucked to his chin and then back to him. She nodded sagely. “I see. Do take care of yourself, Eddie.”
She wave back at Steve. “Bye, dear. Thank you so much again for the cake yesterday.”
“Of course, Mrs. Laurence, you have a good day,” Steve said softly.
Eddie finally made it to the counter.
“I forget she’s Jeff’s mom,” Steve muttered as he wiped down an already clean counter.
Eddie cleared his throat. “Yeah. Like I forgot he was in town for his parent’s wedding anniversary. I guess time does that to you.”
Steve nodded. “So you’re actually here.”
“So I’m actually here,” he agreed. “But first I want to know what the fuck a monster is?”
Steve’s eyes misted as he pulled out a brownie from the case and set it on a piece of parchment paper.
“It’s called that because it’s big, green, and ugly, but soft and sweet,” he explained like he was reading from a script, refusing to look up at Eddie, “just like the Frankenstein monster from that super old horror movie.”
Eddie looked down at the so-called monstrosity with a wave of affection for the man in front of him. That wasn’t why it was named the monster. The reason it was called that was because that’s what the towns people were calling him before he left for fortune and fame, because he played D&D, like metal music, and was an out and proud gay man. That and the fact that they thought he had killed a bunch of kids with a batch of bad blow.
Which had been bullshit. Considering he had never sold meth or cocaine and didn’t have any on him. So when they tested his hair, his clothes, his uncle’s trailer and couldn’t even find so much a speck of the stuff, let alone the stuff that killed the kids, they let him go.
As far as Eddie was aware they still don’t know who sold them the drugs.
So yeah, Steve made him the brownie when he was at his lowest to tell him how soft and sweet he was despite being called a monster.
Eddie opened his wallet and got out the cash for the brownie and handed it to Steve.
Steve went through the motions of getting him his change. Which Eddie immediately put in their little tip jar.
Steve boxed up the brownie and handed Eddie the box.
Eddie pulled out an envelope out of his messenger bag and handed it to Steve.
Steve sighed and pulled them out. He began to look over them over and had a pen in hand, when he looked up to see Eddie moaning around the brownie.
He clicked the pen and shoved it back in his apron. “I better have my lawyer look over this, after all I’m just dumb, right Eddie?”
Eddie’s eyes widen and he choked down the bite of the brownie. Flashing back to their last major fight.
“God!” he screamed. “How can you be this stupid? Those kids are in high school now, they have their own parents, for fuck’s sake. Where is your ambition? This is just bullshit. You aren’t chained here for fuck’s sake.”
Steve’s face shuttered and the mask he only pulled out when his parents were around dropped over his features. Bland, clueless, and absolutely frightening in its uncanny valley.
That’s when Eddie knew he’d fucked up bad. He had said the three things he swore in his wedding vows he’d never say to Steve. That he had no ambition, that he was stupid, and that he was bullshit.
He turned on his heel and never looked back.
Steve smirked as if he knew what was flashing through his mind and walked away, leaving Eddie standing there with hand near his mouth, the expression of shock still on his frozen features.
****
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3- @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach @danili666
4- @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog
5- @justforthedead89 @vecnuthy @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690
6- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon
7- @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @dragonmama76 @scheodingers-muppet @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt
8- @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @blackpanzy
9- @amazing-spiderkeys @oldpinghai @raisedbylibrarians @kultiras @swimmingbirdrunningrock
10- @steddie-as-they-go @captain--low @micheledawn1975
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mazzystar24 · 3 days
Note
Asking this under anon bc i don’t wanna get any backlash in my inbox lmao
but to start this off: i love oliver stark, and i am so appreciative of how important he views this storyline and the representation it provides
however
i am going to be very disappointed in him if we get through the next few episodes, and it becomes clear that they aren’t going to further develop buddie anymore. he has always been so careful and cautious when it comes to implying things in interviews/press stuff, but lately with this resurgence in his response to fandom interest with buddie (liking fanart, reposting it, talking openly about buddie in interviews, confirming things like buck thinking eddie was attractive, etc.) if they don’t go that route, it will honestly severely hurt me.
i have very mixed feelings about what is and isn’t “queerbaiting” (most of my friends would say i tend to not believe that it’s a thing, and to an extent i agree) but there are certain situations in which something does blatantly feel like baiting… to me this is one of those situations.
with both lou and edy still being around, as well as ryan’s sudden stint in pr jail, the fandom’s obsession w lou/tommy, and tim minear’s seeming interest in complying with fan-service… it’s hard to remain optimistic that they will actually give us buddie. the past two weeks have given me whiplash as a buddie fan and i am getting tired of the show using our desperation and love for this ship as a marketing tactic when they have no intention of going there (tim minear himself saying things like “i don’t like to plan endgame relationships” or “there are no plans for buddie at the moment”).
that is why the media’s sudden obsession with asking about buddie, as well as oliver’s willingness to interact with buddie content online combined with the constant flow from the set of things not going in the direction of buddie… it feels very intentional to drag us in. and if oliver is participating in that, then i am going to be very disappointed and hurt by that. he used to care so much about not getting our hopes up, but lately it feels like that isn’t the case anymore, and that getting our hopes up is their way if getting us to continue watching the show because they know that people will stop watching after having to watch years of buildup and (at times admittedly) roment subtext between them just for all of that to be completely retconned and them to say “no-homo, bro” in favor of a character/ship that came out of nowhere and has had no development.
obviously, i don’t blame os for the storyline- he’s not a writer, he doesn’t get to dictate what does or doesn’t happen. But he is the one getting all of the media attention, and using that to shine a spotlight on buddie when (if) he knows that buddie isn’t happening? it feels very icky to me and i really don’t want to have a reason to dislike him.
unfortunately it’s seeming more and more like a possibility each day as we get inundated with bts info that doesn’t bode well for us at all.
I’m afraid I’ll have to disagree with you anon sorry😭🫶
If buddie doesn’t go canon/ they don’t show they’re heading in that direction in the next few episodes, I still would not blame Oliver at ALL for his recent more openness about buddie
(Idk how familiar you are with me and if you are you’ll know this but if you’re not lemme clarify I use bulletpoints a lot but not to be curt or rude I just like breaking things into chunks🫡)
1. He has made sure to constantly clarify that he doesn’t know how things are gonna go and he has no control over things- i mean EVERY time he spoke about buddie
2. He’s also a fan of the show guys, yes yes he’s an actor and it has different implications I agree 100% but also if he’s choosing to ship his character or enjoy fan work that’s his prerogative and sure he can lurk privately like he has in the past but also he probably knows that implications aside fans who make that work will be ecstatic to see him actually liking the stuff
3. The man legit said he deleted social media at one point cos he didn’t wanna like or share stuff that’d accidentally give people false hope for buddie or bi Buck but he has silently agreed for years and he hated not being able to confirm bi buck till now
4. He’s been a HUGE advocate for us both on the buddie front and bi buck front and that deserves recognition
5. As you said there is a LOT of bucktommy love rn which is great and all but may draw focus away from buddie, if Oliver is intentionally trying to get buddie fans to keep going it could genuinely just to show that buddie fans are still aiming for buddie endgame and that they still make up a huge portion of the fandom
6. Writing is CONSTANTLY in progress on 911 so again buddie fans being more vocal and abc and writers seeing such positive responses to him so much as interacting with buddie posts or answering buddie questions give them a gauge of audience’s wants (granted Tim has stated it’s not a HUGE factor for him) and also keep in mind s8 is still in the books so even proposals of storylines may be in the talks rn
7. When he talks he is VERY careful about his words and is very well spoken on the topic like yes there have been more stuff we can read into and be optimistic about but you can tell that he in no way is saying specific things to bait people, when talking about existing buddie things he talks about HIS interpretation and uses lots of maybes and might’ve beens and I see how that could be and when he talks about future buddie he talks about being open to it talks about what he’d want from it and he talks about not having control or knowledge of it happening
So yeah he has done/said things that I absolutely think warrant optimism (I made a whole post about it) but if it doesn’t pan out that optimism should a- still be there b- not turn into blame for him
Okay now Oliver aside- the questions being asked about buddie and all the buddie promotions I would be side eyeing the higher ups for if it’s for nothing because yes all the articles and stuff are stuff being pre-approved by abc and the people higher up than cast members or the journalists but I would also keep in mind that s8 is still in the works so hope is not lost even if s7 isn’t what we hoped for because keep in mind we had only 10 eps to work with too
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wrioluvr · 1 hour
Text
flirty playboy x mature male reader
Tumblr media
this stupid ass meme had been on my mind forever and i realised how funny it would be to have a slutty playboy who just sleeps with anyone to seriously pine over a more mature, secure guy who doesn't fall for any of his shallow charms and tricks.... here are just some blurbs of their dynamic (˵ ¬ᴗ¬˵)
his name is roman. he's a little toxic, but he just wants to be loved.
cw: some smut, top male reader
it all started with a little night out. you didn't do those often, due to devoting most of your time towards work and earning a stable career, but finish this particularly gruelling assignment called for a celebration. at the bar, dancing with your friends, a good-looking man with a playful glint in his eyes approached you full of bravado. he told you how handsome you were, and had been eyeing you from across the room for a while now. but from a single glance, you could tell he was the type to break hearts. beach-blonde dyed hair, a tight fitting tank top revealing his muscular build, an eyebrow piercing, the way his mouth curled up so subtly into a little smirk.... he was everything you knew to avoid getting serious with. but a little hookup couldn't hurt, right? you deserved a little fun.
and it didn't hurt you at all. a few failed relationships had made you wise beyond your years, knowing to easily seperate the good guys from the bad. you knew your self-worth. roman, on the other hand, was absolutely smitten. no other man had fucked him THIS good, gave him such gentle aftercare, and even let him stay as long as he needed. the way you so effortlessly lifted his legs up to thrust in and out of him at a rhythmic pace, or fondling his tits and squeezing his nipples softly while you hit it from the back, or tenderly running your fingers down his spine, arching it sensually.... he loved it all. it was clear to him that you prioritised his pleasure as much as your own, and it showed in how he orgasmed several times before you even came in him once, panting breathlessly while wearing the sluttiest expression of his life. it was nothing like any of the men he had sex with before. afterwards, you let him stay the night in a guest room, and even brewed a cup of coffee for him in the morning.
roman was damn near tears when you offered to drop him off at his house before you headed off to work. if he was being honest with himself, his insecurities were the root of his constant need for sexual intimacy, so being treated with genuine kindness for once was new to him.
"is dropping you off here alright?" you ask, turning into the road of his apartment complex.
"y-yeah...." he looks out the window, unsure how to look you in the eyes.
"okay. thanks for last night. stay safe." your words carried an air of finality to them, like you were so sure the two of you would never cross paths again. he didn't like that.
"uh, uh......" he stuttered, all his usual flirtatiousness thrown out the window as he couldn't me your gaze. "could i... get your number?"
your friendly smile froze on your face. "uhhhh.... sorry, i'm not really looking for anything serious right now."
he quickly regained his composure, charm turned up to the max. shifting his tank top so more of his chest was exposed and you could notice his nipples protruding, roman whispered in a low tone, "that's okay! we can just be casual... and fuck anytime you like." a wink. a hand on your thigh.
"jeez... okay, no offense, but i've heard rumours from my friends that you're a bit of a... playboy. i'm not interested in being your toy, sorry."
roman's face flushed in embarrassment, knowing what you said was true. except the part on him seeing you as a toy. that was untrue. he could feel a warmth growing from the pit of his stomach at the thought of spending more time with you. were these... butterflies?
maybe begging would work.
"okay fine, i am a bit of a player... but please, please, pleaseeeeeee.... let's be in contact, okay? as friends?" roman sniffled pathetically, shaking your shoulder in desperation. he needed to be in your presence. why weren't his usual maneating tactics working?!?!
"alright. here you go. just don't spam me or anything, okay? i gotta go for work. see you." you sigh, a little exasperated but choosing not to let it show. he immediately lit up, typing your number in his contacts and saving many hearts next to your name. you prayed your acts of basic human decency wouldn't cause him to catch feelings. you needed to focus on your job right now.
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
3:02pm
[romanbabyxx]
hiiiiiii
[romanbabyxx]
i know you said not to spam you but like
[romanbabyxx]
i miss u
[romanbabyxx]
can we meet up at the bar for drinks or something like that? please?
3:10pm
you check the messages on your phone, rolling your eyes and ignoring them. he was probably sending this text to at least three other guys right now. he had a history of cheating, based on what you heard from your friends. you weren't going to be another one of his victims.
5:35pm
[romanbabyxx]
are u ignoring me?
[romanbabyxx]
im sorryyyyyyyy
[romanbabyxx]
pls hit me back when ur free
7.30 pm
[name]
sorry, just got off work. will be super busy this week, so not free. mb.
[romanbabyxx]
oh, its okay! next week then?
[name]
i'll see
this went on for a few weeks, you constantly evading his invitations, being polite and professional, never too intimate over text. roman was starting to get fed up. he's so used to getting everything he wants, he doesn't know what to do when he actually has to work for the one he desires. he actually hadn't hooked up with anyone since your one night stand, but you didn't believe that.
roman was at his wits' end. he could only think of one final plan to get your attention.
trying to make you jealous.
over the next week, he hooked up with any and everyone he met in the bar, not bothering to keep his slutting around discreet. he wanted you to hear the rumours. he wanted you to feel a sense of unease within your very being. he wanted you to feel possessive over him. he wanted you, to want him. the whole time, even as he was getting fucked, he could only imagine you caressing him, holding him close, loving him.
his deeds didn't go unnoticed. your friends told you about it, yet you didn't feel anything in the slightest. you were right, after all... he forgot about you within a week and moved on to whichever poor man he would leave high and dry next.
the next time you bumped into him at the bar, roman was his usual, party-loving self, excitedly slinging an arm around you, a drink in hand. his plan had to work, surely? you would be begging to have him back. but yet, when he offhandedly (yet so intentionally) mentioned how much dick he had been getting the past week, anticipating your change in expression, nothing happened. "oh. good for you." was all you said.
he sputtered, flustered by your calm demeanour. didn't you care? at all?! "but.... but.... aren't you jealous? that i've been hooking up with other guys?!"
you stare at him, a genuine quzzical expression plastered across your face. "why would i be? it's not like we're dating or anything. it was just a one time thing."
your words hit like a knife through his heart. he clutched his chest dramatically, a pout forming on his lips. "i'll be faithful! i promise!" his words came out more desperate than he intended. he felt so vulnerable, so naked, yet you were the face of serenity. your unimpressed eyes stared through his soul, as if you were scrutinising his very core. he knew you could heal him, make him feel loved, but he was starting to doubt there was any possibility you would feel the same.
"i'm sure that's what you said to the last guy you cheated on."
.
.
.
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
i intended for this to be lighthearted but why was it actually kinda depressing tbh
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