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#michael a newcomer
airplanes924 · 2 years
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Movies I’ve Watched in 2022
Number 36
Where the Crawdads Sing
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recovering-vamp · 4 months
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mariocki · 9 months
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A young Barbara Murray stars as travelling theatrical artiste Pat Dawn, getting mixed up in murder and intrigue in Mystery Junction (1951)
#fave spotting#barbara murray#the power game#lady pamela wilder#mystery junction#b movie#1951#british cinema#sydney tafler#michael mccarthy#panels <3#when network folded i picked up quite a few things I'd been holding out on but i actually already owned and had seen this quota quickie#crime movie; nevertheless‚ fool that i am‚ i found a blu ray copy cheap online and made the upgrade bc... well bc Babs that's why#truthfully her character doesn't have a huge amount to do beyond being Sydney Tafler's love interest (another factor was my love of Syd)#but she does it beautifully. McCarthy doesn't give her a single closeup (fool!!!) but she does get one great scene in which she explains#her knowledge of the villain of the film‚ recounting the harrowing fate of a young friend of hers (it's one of the best scenes in the film)#troublingly tho.... no hats. was this pre hats? did Babs develop a hat fixation only later? or was it bc she was still a young actor at#this point‚ she didn't feel confident in demanding an array of hats be set at her dressing room door every day (as i have chosen to imagine#was the case later in her career). she wasn't quite a newcomer at this point (she'd had a notable role in 1949's Passport to Pimlico) but#safe to say she wasn't quite a Star star yet (she shares top billing with Tafler here but this is in every sense a minor picture on a#shoestring budget; no reflection on McCarthy‚ an imaginative and talented writer director who might have been destined for bigger things#had he not died prematurely at the end of the decade)#anyway she's here and she's lovely and she gives rotten Martin Benson a piece of her mind despite the gun in his hand#good for you Babs! <3
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seokjinsonlyone · 1 year
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all I can think of whenever I occasionally think about Tony and AHL is the fact that he was in a Burger King commercial and made a turrible song
bro i can write a five page essay on how great american hustle life is especially being a black fan like it's so important to me LOL but when i think of tony i just can't help but think of that one scene when him and jimin was in couple's hanboks like ksskksdljs and also when jimin gave him that yogurt to drink even tho he was lactose intolerant and when they was playing basketball and suga was getting pissed bc they was cheating and in another video tony was talking about how good he actually is at basketball i'm about to rewatch AHL NOW KSLDKFJ
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bananacorn-limeade · 9 months
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A tale they said was TOO SHOCKING for the screen.
Ladies and gentlefolk, American International Pictures presents the CINEMATIC EVENT of 1961:
A SONG of ICE and FIRE!
A Roger Corman production. Music by Albert Glasser.
Starring... well, you'll see. (Will this be a "good" movie? Absolutely not. Will costumes and hairstyles be woefully anachronistic? For sure. Will many casting choices be questionable? Indeed. Will major plot points be changed to comply with the morality clauses of the Hayes Code? You betcha!)
Starring
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RICHARD CARLSON as EDDARD STARK - an HONORABLE man caught in a WEB of political intrigue!
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MARIE WINDSOR as CATELYN STARK - the mother who will do ANYTHING to protect her own!
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COLEEN GRAY as CERSEI LANNISTER - the BEAUTIFUL QUEEN with a TERRIBLE SECRET!
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JOHN AGAR as JAIME LANNISTER - the DASHING SWORDSMAN who SHOULDN'T be TRUSTED!
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MICHAEL DUNN as TYRION LANNISTER - the HALF MAN with BIG APPETITES!
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BASIL RATHBONE as Tywin Lannister - the STRATEGIST with a HEART of ICE!
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RAYMOND BURR as ROBERT BARATHEON - the king who LOVED WINE - almost as much as he LOVED WOMEN!
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JUNE KENNEY as DAENERYS TARGARYEN - the PRINCESS from an EXOTIC LAND!
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ROBERT REED as RENLY BARATHEON - the HANDSOME KING all of Westeros WANTED!
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GLENN LANGAN as STANNIS BARATHEON - the HEIR who WOULDN'T BACK DOWN!
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ALLISON HAYES as MELISANDRE - the sultry RED WOMAN no king could deny!
With...
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ANTHONY DEXTER as the SCHEMING Petyr Baelish!
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LON CHANEY JR as the TERRIFYING Sandor Clegane!
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and TOR JOHNSON as THE BROTHER who MADE him a MONSTER!
...And Introducing...
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MICHAEL LANDON as JON SNOW - a TORTURED SOUL at the EDGE of the WORLD!
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JOHN ASHLEY as ROBB STARK - the BOY KING marching to his DOOM!
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DOLORES FAITH as SANSA STARK - the fair princess TRAPPED by a WICKED queen!
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DAWN BENDER as ARYA STARK - a LITTLE GIRL with LOTS OF FIGHT!
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and newcomer JACK NICHOLSON as THEON GREYJOY - the rogue who HIDES behind a SMILE!
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THE INTRIGUE
THE SUSPENSE
The Song of Ice and Fire!
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keerysfreckles · 7 months
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stay here - mike schmidt
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pairing: mike schmidt x f!reader
warnings: use of y/n and she/her pronouns (no movie spoilers bc i haven't seen it yet im just obsessed with mike) fluff! fluff! fluff! like one makeout scene but thats it
enjoy!
to say babysitting michael schmidt's little sister, abby, was easy would be a lie. mike called you earlier that day, right before his shift started, and asked if you could look over abby until he got home. at the end of the call he mentioned his hours were shorter, and earlier than normal, so he wouldn't be home too late.
it was currently eleven pm. abby's supposed to be in bed by ten-thirty, and nothing was working. y/n tried calming her down with a disney movie. she even colored with her in her makeshift fort in her room. but nothing worked, she was as hyper as ever.
"abby, please! we both know you're going to be tired tomorrow and you have school," y/n pleads.
"but i'm not tired," abby groans, rolling over dramatically on the couch.
"you know what? fine. i'll just tell mike you weren't listening to me," y/n sends abby an evil smile. abby perks up, and sits up to lean on the arm of the couch to look at y/n.
"no! no no no! he said if i was good all week he'd buy me something from the store."
y/n crosses her arms and leans against the hallway wall, opposite of the couch. "looks like you're going to have to listen to me afterall."
"but i'm still not tired," abby groans again, but walks over towards y/n.
y/n looked down at the girl in front of her. she saw the small bags under her eyes, and noticed her eyes kept closing every so often.
an idea popped into y/n's head, "why don't you go lay down, and i'll be in in ten minutes, yeah?"
abby nodded, confused by the request, but still nodded nonetheless and walked down the hallway and towards her room. y/n watched for a moment before abby was fully inside her room. she knew abby was most likely to fall asleep once her head hit the pillow. now she only had to kill two hours until mike would be home.
y/n and mike have known each other for three years. y/n moved into the one story house that was unoccupied in mike's neighborhood. the town wasn't used to newcomers, so of course y/n was the talk of the town for her first two weeks there.
it wasn't until a month later when y/n was on her morning run on a saturday, and had bumped into michael. she was instantly confused when she noticed he was in his work uniform, and on the way back to his house. the two made light conversation, and ended up at y/n's that night for a movie marathon.
about a month after that, mike knocked on y/n's front door, and properly asked her if she wanted to go on a date with him. of course the girl agreed, and that was the first date of many for the couple.
which leaves y/n in the position she's in - babysitting abby.
when mike and y/n officially started dating abby interrogated the girl. asking her a bunch of questions, some more personal than others, which mike quickly interjected. abby gave mike the idea of having y/n watch over her, instead of having to pay random strangers. mike obviously agreed.
y/n settled herself on the couch and put on a random horror movie that was on tv. she couldn't even get past the opening as her eyes closed and her body went limp from tiredness.
she grabbed the blanket at the other end of the couch before fully letting sleep embrace her.
the only time y/n woke up was when she heard the doorknob rattling. she turned slightly, to look over the back of the couch, and saw her boyfriend walking through the doorway.
"shit, were you sleeping?" mike asked, taking off his jacket and throwing it by the front door.
y/n sat up and rubbed the sleep out of her eyes, "yeah, but i can go. abby's asleep so i did my job pretty well," she chuckles.
"thank you again. and you know you can stay babe, i don't mind the comapny," michael smiles.
y/n couldn't help but notice how on edge mike looked as soon as he walked inside.
"are you okay?" she asks softly, still sitting on the couch.
mike nods as he sits down beside her, "yeah, just a long night." he leans over and kisses her cheek, causing y/n's cheeks to turn pink.
"do you want to talk about it?" y/n moves her leg to rest her chin on her knee, as mike's eyes glaze over the tv screen before turning fully towards his girlfriend.
"william was just on my ass before my shift, and vanessa had so much energy tonight, i just couldn't handle it. and it felt like time was going so slow tonight," mike's voice was quiet. y/n could tell he had a rough night as he rubbed his eyes.
y/n leans forward and turns off the tv, making mike slightly confused. "is there anything i can do to cheer you up?" y/n stands in front of mike and holds her hands out. he immediately takes her hands in his as he stands with her. mike leans forward and kisses y/n's forehead.
"can you just stay here tonight?" mike's voice almost seems desperate, as if y/n's presence was the only thing keeping him going right now.
y/n nods, "i'll always stay if you ask me to," she smiles as mike closes his eyes and rests his forehead against hers.
"was abby okay tonight?" mike asked, pulling away, but still keeping their hands connected.
"she was good, until trying to get her to go to bed. but you didn't hear that from me," this caused mike to let out a small laugh.
the couple, with one of their hands linked with each other's, went down the hallway. mike stopped y/n and opened abby's bedroom door quietly. y/n stood beside mike and held onto his arm with her free hand, resting her cheek on his shoulder.
the pair were met with abby sleeping under her blanket. small snores escaped her lips. y/n leaned up and kissed mike's jaw, before whispering, "c'mon, i know you need sleep just as much as she does."
y/n pulls mike into his room, which was at this point their shared room. mike had two drawers of his dresser specifically for y/n, vice verse in y/n's room. mike stepped into the bathroom and they both got ready for the night, in the most comfortable clothes they own.
y/n was already laying down under the sheets once mike came out of the bathroom. even laying there, he thought y/n looked so effortlessly beautiful.
"why are you staring at me like that?" y/n asks as she watches mike slide into the bed next to her.
"what? i can't stare at my pretty girl?" mike leans forward and kisses y/n on the lips, as he brings his left hand to her cheek. he rolls over, so his right arm is on the mattress, as he hovers over y/n. her hands move to his waist, slowing moving to his lower back.
their lips molded with one another's, and y/n could almost sense the stress leaving mike's body.
mike barely pulled away, leaving little to no space in between the two, "i love you so much."
y/n smiled, "i love you too."
she leaned up to kiss him once more, and mike playfully rolled his eyes while moving to lay down beside the girl. mike loved falling asleep while holding onto y/n's waist, because he knew she was safe.
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frogchiro · 1 year
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ELABORATE on the slasher ghost pls pls pls ELABORATE me needs more
OKAY SO I was thinking long and hard about this and how to approach it. At first I wanted to make Ghost like the classic killer/slasher Michael Myers style, killing in the woods, final girl reader etc etc BUT then I though, how about a little twist?
I'm pretty sure this isn't as original but still, but I came up with butcher!Simon 'Ghost' Riley who has a shop and lives in a secluded, small town up in the mountains and is a killer♡
HEAR ME OUT; big brute older man, around 40, no one on the town knows him really or about his past but judging by his dogtags they conclude he's ex military but rumours continue. They say that he was dishonorably discharged due to accusations of murder of a fellow soldier, it was never proven and he was never put in jail but apparently it was enough to throw him out of the military for good.
Although the cruel rumours were quite unreasonable and frankly sounded like some extravagant urban legend the man in question, Simon Riley still put you a bit on edge, but to be fair everything put you on edge here. As a total newcomer in the small town, a runaway to be precise, still so young, barely into your 20ies, but finally free from under the thumb of those assholes who were supposed to be your family but did not act at all like that, and this town...creeped you out to say the least.
It was just the town's general vibe was...off but you ultimately chalked it up to being newly on your own and the fact that it appeared to always be gloomy weather; mist, rainfall, thunder or snow, but what really stood out for you was the local butcher and the mysterious enigmatic Simon Riley...
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dailytomlinson · 1 month
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Music stars honoured at first 'Brit Awards of the North'
Louis Tomlinson, The Courteeners and Aitch were among the winners at the inaugural Northern Music Awards, which organisers hope will become the "Brits of the North".
The event, held in Manchester on Tuesday, was set up to celebrate talent from across the north of England.
Former One Direction star Tomlinson, hailing from Doncaster, was named artist of the year - beating fellow South Yorkshire singer Self Esteem and Newcastle's Sam Fender.
The winners in full:
Artist of the year - Louis Tomlinson
Band of the year - The Courteeners
DJ of the year - DJ Paulette
Newcomer of the year - English Teacher
Breakthrough act of the year - The K’s
Music moment of the year - Aitch at Glastonbury
Special recognition award - Melanie C
Northern icon award - Lisa Stansfield
Northern music award 2024 - Tim Burgess
Disruptor award - The Reytons
Festival of the year - Beat-Herder, Lancashire
Inspirational venue of the year (under 500) - Brudenell Social Club, Leeds
Inspirational venue of the year (under 2,000) - Band on the Wall, Manchester
Industry icon - Michael Adex, NQ
Music and culture for wellbeing award - DanceSyndrome, Everybody Dance, Lancashire
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verxsyon · 1 year
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·:*¨༺ ❝ 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐖 (𝐈𝐈) ❞
with your auto workshop at risk of closing down, your best friend offers to introduce you to people who are definitely in need of your high quality services: underground street racers of blue lock, whose obsessions are winning the races. however, your arrival at the track makes them think otherwise.
✧ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠. yukimiya kenyu, otoya eita, karasu tabito, shidou ryusei, itoshi rin, itoshi sae, oliver aiku, alexis ness, & michael kaiser x gn!reader
✧ 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭. headcanon (written) ; 1.1k
✧ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞. e2l au, f2l au, street racer au ; fluff
✧ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬. allusions to violence (shidou & rin)
✧ 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐚. here’s the second part containing characters who are more egoistic than the last batch… nah, that’s debatable lol. did i actually spend the entire day working on this? yes, i was a roll; love it here. anyways, my other fave, yukki, is here! i didn’t mention it last time: this au was originally written for another fandom years ago, moved to genshin but that didn’t happen, and then here! egoistic soccer boys as street racers? yes, please.
[ 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐖 (𝐈) ]
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𝐲𝐮𝐤𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐲𝐚 𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐲𝐮. the model. he’s a member of the neo egoists and is ranked fifth of the top six racers in blue lock. his charm is the focal point of his character, driving the audience nuts. curious by nature, he wonders what important qualities you possess other than being “kira ryosuke’s date”. he also wonders how you managed to get the likes of barou, who treats everyone like trash, and nagi, who thinks of only going home, wrapped around your finger. seeing you teach nagi about car anatomy gives him the chance to introduce himself. he thinks there’s something special about you, which he intends to find out, but a teammate of his believes so otherwise.
𝐨𝐭𝐨𝐲𝐚 𝐞𝐢𝐭𝐚. the ninja. he’s a member of the neo egoists and is ranked fourth of the top six racers in blue lock. he claims to be not like his fellow racers and teammates and prefers to operate in the shadows. unlike them, he doesn’t see you as an angel who was sent by god in the form of a mechanic to fix their cars. he fails to see why they’re smitten by you, therefore not interested in interacting with you at all. that turns out to be a lie when yukki gives you a tour of the turf of the neo egoists. it’ll be rude not to make you feel welcome, so he wants to give you a chance. a crow-themed racer laughs at him for fooling himself that he doesn’t find you attractive one bit.
𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐮 𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐨. the assassin. he’s a member of the neo egoists and is ranked third of the top six racers in blue lock. all about good vibes and having a good time, he doesn’t want his team to act “mediocre” around you. most newcomers are notorious for never setting foot in this place again. he’s so relieved to hear that you came at your own volition thanks to ryosuke’s persuasion, and everyone you’ve met is nice to you… sans certain others, so he doesn’t need to worry about making an impromptu spiel of why blue lock, aka his team dare you add, is great. if you think he’s too friendly for your taste, let’s see if the next guy who’s stalking you right now takes the top of your list.
𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐝𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐲𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐢. the joker. he’s ranked second of the top six racers in blue lock. unrestrained both in words and action, he goes about his day and does everything as he pleases. judging by how karasu and the rest of the neo egoists are quick to stand either by or in front of you, he’s bad news. the altercation got team z’s attention, especially kunigami who he has massive beef with. you being “ryosuke’s date” doesn’t phase him, nor your best friend going for his head for being near you. ever since the older itoshi brother joined forces with u20 and chose him to be at this side, he’s been “behaving”. the younger itoshi brother isn’t amused, as if he didn’t break his nose last race .
𝐢𝐭𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐫𝐢𝐧. the puppeteer. he’s the unofficial leader of the neo egoists and is ranked first of the top six racers in blue lock. the youngest of the itoshi brothers, has a score to settle with his older brother, sae, who’s participating in the upcoming race as a member of u20 along with his personal choice shidou. it’s already bad enough for racers to use physical violence to settle arguments, but it’s even worse for him to be involved in another fight with shidou, especially before a race that determines his fate and prove to sae that he’s the best of the best. he doesn’t spare a glance at you or ask if you’re alright, as sae walks into the neo egoists’ garage to check out the commotion.
𝐢𝐭𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐬𝐚𝐞. the prodigy. he’s one of the new generation world 11, the best eleven racers in the streets and a member of royale. as he’ll be the only one representing his team in the upcoming race, he joined forces with u20 since they’re short by two members and personally chose shidou to fill in the other spot. even if it’s not obvious at face value, everyone can tell there’s bad blood between the brothers by the intense atmosphere created from their staring contest. sighing, he breaks contact first to search where you are, then looks at rin to scoff at his lack of concern for you when shidou approaches you. in the distance, claps are heard from a man with “u20” on his jacket.
𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐢𝐤𝐮. the player. he’s the captain of u20, the name of the team you’ve heard from literally everyone who won’t shut up about them for the past several hours. he’s highly respected among his team for his patience; dealing with sae and shidou, the most difficult people to work with on earth, is like a drive around the neighborhood. he intrudes with a reminder that the streets don’t approve of violence and that they’re going to race soon. in addition, a blue lock racer by the name of kira ryosuke has a special guest and they should be on their best behavior. yet he’s a hypocrite, flirting with you in front of his current date and promising you an autograph when he wins.
𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐱𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬. the magician. he’s the mechanic of bastard münchen. he understands your position as the center of attention, claiming to be just like you — having a partner for an adrenaline junkie and being the “fixer” to clean up your mess. he invites you to see his partner’s car at the special garage as he’s on his way their to fix its engine, to which you happily accept as there’s finally someone with the same job who you can geek about car anatomy and share techniques. the way he repairs the engine is like clockwork, fluid and in tempo. he really is on a different level. you hear a chuckle behind you, asking if you’re fascinated by his work.
𝐦𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐞𝐥 𝐤𝐚𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐫. the thorn. he’s one of the new generation world 11, the best eleven racers in the streets and one of the major forces of bastard münchen. he puts in so much faith and trust in his partner, ness, the “fixer” of his messes. also known as “blue rose” in his turf, he’s shrouded in mystery and seems like the type who can turn the impossible to infinite possibilities. but in reality, he’s a pain in the ass. within minutes of your encounter, he keeps bragging about his abilities and declaring that his victory will lead to the disbandment of blue lock, so they won’t get in his way of his career. the race’s up, and you’re hoping that a blue lock racer wins to shut his mouth.
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✧ 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬. if your url is in bold, that means i can’t tag you!
@2018-01-20 ; @astranne ; @kamiiyaka ; @keqism ; @lilikags​ ; @thetruepair​ ; @wanderersbell ; @venexus​
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Wish Granted 🌟👩🏾🎶 (Wish Reimagined)
Chapter 1: Once Upon A Time...
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
We open up our story with the Disney 100th anniversary logo:
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Then it transitions to the Walt Disney Productions title with the overture from Snow White playing, followed by the casts of the story and the people who worked together to create it. The next shot brings us a message from Walt himself, leftover from his very first movie.
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(They had the AUDACITY to leave that out!? Shows how grateful they are...)
It fades to black and shows the camera panning over to a fancy 3D storybook with the title "Wish Granted" on the cover, and it slowly opens up, turning to the first couple of pages.
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The narration begins with a young woman's voice reading in a calm, yet cheerful voice.
Once upon a time, in a land…pretty far away, there was a kingdom off the coast of the Iberian Peninsula. A Kingdom full of magic, dreams and wonder, Rosas.
The book then turns a page to show two pictures, one portraying a man, a woman and a lynx. The other showing a large kingdom near the sea.
In this kingdom ruled by King Magnifico and Queen Amaya, Rosas is a safe place for people all over the world. No matter where a person is from, they will have a safe and happy life. However.....
The book flips to the next page, showing Magnifico taking a wish from a citizen. On the first page, the woman his happily giving it to him, but on the second, she looks incredibly sad, gently clutching her chest with sorrow.
When you arrive, you must give your greatest wish to the king in exchange to live there. The cost of it leaves with you with an empty feeling inside, never being able to fill the hole in your heart until the king grants it himself.
The book flips to another page showing a girl in purple, a yellow glowing person, their pet goat looking upwards and the shadowy figure of the royals holding the wishes in their hands.
This is a story about a girl, a star, a goat, a kingdom and a wish. This is a story about how anyone can make their wishes come true....
The camera then zooms in on the next page, transitions into 2D as it goes directly into the storybook.
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We see few boats crossing the sea, making their way towards Rosas. A little redheaded girl is taking a look at the approaching kingdom. "Look, mommy! Is that it? Is that our new home?" she asked enthusiastically, pointing ahead. Her mother joined her and nodded as a smile crept across her face. "Yes, dear. That's Rosas." she said with hope in her eyes as they approach the new land.
Speaking of the new land, one of the citizens is seen at the port. A teen boy with collar length blonde hair, was waiting to greet them. The biggest thing that stood out to him was the red tunic and yellow scarf around his neck. The boy was waving a flag with the symbol of Ross' embroided on it, signaling them to the port.
The teen took a deep breath and started pacing back and forth, talking to himself. "All right, Flazino. You can do this. You've done this dozens of times. Just pretend you're not sending them to their possible suffering....I've got a bad feeling about it."
Flazino heard the people approaching and quickly slapped on a smile. He spun around and greeted the newcomers with open arms.
"Haha! Hola, Shalom, Salam! Welcome to your new home! You're going to love it here, especially our magnificent rulers! Everyone ready?"
The travelers cheer in agreement and follow the boy through the gates of the kingdom.
🎵 Welcome to Rosas 🎵🌹
Flazino
Magnifico
Amaya
Group singing
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Oh, Welcome to Rosas, an amazing kingdom. Where the possibilities are more than you can fathom!
(Flazino signals for the crowd to follow him as they pass through the gates)
There's no other place just as full of surprise, Where your dreams and your reality can collide!
(He passes by a man who's juggling 10 balls at once, hinting that his wish was to be the best juggler in the kingdom)
The most magical place on Earth, where most wondrous ideas give birth! You want to make dreams your come true? Well, have I got good news for you!
(He gives a wink and other residents start appear around him for the chorus)
(The background characters- I mean the Rosas citizens who haven't had their life force drained yet start to dance)
'Cause here in the city of Rosas (Oh, ah-ah)
You can turn all your wanting to wishing No what-ifs, ands or buts Oh, here in the city of Rosas (Oh, ah-ah) It's unlikely that you’ll be unhappy No need to make a fuss
(Flazino lifts the little girl onto his shoulders as they continue) A home for me (Me) For you (You) And all of us (Us) Thе city of Rosas
(He leads the group over to a small theater showing little muppets of Magnifico and Amaya. The following moments and dancing scenes are also a reference to the "Topsy Turvy" song number from the Hunchback of Notre Dame. Love that movie)
So like, we have this king named Magnifico
(He points to muppet versions of the royals, with the Magnifico one holding his scepter high)
He built Rosas many years ago
(the background has a little cardboard replica of the kingdom rising behind it.)
With lightning for hands and eyes that can glow
(He raises his hands creepily and jokingly to the child, but she gasps in fear)
No, no, no, I'm just kidding! But he is powerful! They're just like us with a twist.
(He ruffles her hair playfully)
So much power, too much to list! (Oh, wow!) The magic exists, And there you have it, poof, there's your wish! Oh and, hey did I mention when you turn eighteen? You get to give your wish in a ceremony And he keeps them safe, every wish he acquires (Wish he acquires) And once a month he grants someone’s greatest desire (Greatest desire)
(The puppets show the King taking a tiny blue orb from a puppet citizen, then it dances around as if it just won a million dollars) It could be you someday, or you, even you! Oh, I can't wait! (He points to three different people on each "you", with a couple them looking doubtful)
(A man asks) Does it hurt? (the girls asks) Do you cry?
(Before Flazino can reply, Magnifico just pops in in front of him, the boy giving a look that says "Where the he'll did you come from!?") Oh, no, and you won't even miss it when you say "goodbye"
(He holds the note on "bye" to show off his singing, while Flazino rolls his eyes in annoyance)
(Then Amaya jumps in to take over part of the final chorus) 'Cause here in the city of Rosas (Oh, ah-ah) You can turn all your wanting to wishing
No what-ifs ands or buts,
Oh, here in the city of Rosas (Oh, ah-ah) It's unlikely that you’ll be unhappy
No need to make a fuss
(The royals take this chours proudly singing, while Sabor stands with a sly smile as he basks in all the attention they're getting. Flazino is visually annoyed and rolls his eyes. He then tries to look for an opening so he can finish the song)
A home for me (Me)
For you (You)
And all of us (Us)
The city of Rosas
(Flazino quickly steps in front of the royals during "And all of us" to try and finish the song, then Magnifico steps in front of him and blocks him with his cape. During the final line, He then raises his hands to the sky and releases an explosion of fireworks and it decorates the area in magical sparkles)
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As sparkles and rose petals shower the audience, applause echoes throughout the stadium. The newcomers were chatting and cheering amongst each other. Flazino was used to this part, its practically pure dopamine when people first arrive and hear one man can grant people's desires. This whole song their idea in the first place, and he's performed it a hundred times. You'd think they at least let him sing the propaganda song!
"I can't wait to get my wish granted now!"
"There's so much I want to ask for!"
"They're such a beautiful couple!"
The little redhead girl from earlier was especially excited. "I'm gonna wish for something real big when I grow up! I want to bring everyone I can here so they can be happy like us!" She giggled and continued to clap her hands.
Flazino's smile faded hearing this. This kid was going to grow up and loose her happiness in the blink of an eye.
Magnifico could see the boy's expression change and cleared his throat. "Well now, I suppose that's enough excitement for you today. We've made good work making our new friends feel welcome." He said sternly.
The boy quickly changed his demeanor. "O-oh. T-thank you, your high-"
He was interrupted by the sudden appearance of a lynx inches away from his face. The feline had a rather angry look on his face. Though he's usually like that when he's has to deal with anyone but his beloved owner. He was being carried by his arms by the Queen.
"Now that all that noise is finished. "You can make yourself useful by giving Sabor here his breakfast." She demanded. "Poor dear must be starving. Aren't you?" she cooed.
Sabor purred....and licked his mouth as he looked Flazino as if he was the breakfast himself. That's definitely not a good sign.
"Uh....yeah, I'll get right on that." The boy responded as he gingerly picked up the lynx and did his best to carry him in his arms. He was only a couple years old, but he weighed as much as a full grown goat. That are the boy wasn't all that strong. "How much can you eat anyway?" Sabor grunted in offense.
"That's a good apprentice! Run along, now!" Magnifico slightly mocked the boy as he left. In a low voice he mumbled. "Peasant boy."
Flazino stopped walking for a moment and looked behind him. He saw the two royals eating up the praise and attention they were getting from the people. The newcomers were enamored with them while the longtime citizens gently clapped, but not nearly as enthusiastically. In fact, they seemed a little sleepy, some with half lidded eyelids.
The boy felt a sharp pain on his shoulder, which made him come back to his senses. Sabor had scratched his shoulder to remind him of his obviously more important meal. (Can you say "spoiled"?)
"Yeah, yeah, I get it. I'll get Dhalia to make your breakfast." He mumbled as he walked down from the stage and away from the crowd.
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We crossfade to outside the Kingdom, as hours pass and day turns to night. Its been a long, stressful day for Flazino, especially when most of tasks were just basic chores, going on errands and maybe learn some magic from Magnifico, if he decided he was ready. Its all become the norm. But there was one thing he was able to do without the watchful eye of the king.
"About that time of month again?" asked a girl as she brought Flazino a horse. The sorcerers' apprentice gathered his bags for his trip and gave the girl a nod. "You got it, Bazema. Those mushrooms take a whole month to grow, and you know much the king loves those." He gently patted the horse on the snout then proceed to mount it. He pulled up the hood over to seemingly cover his head from the chill air.
"Would you mind finding some herbs while you're there? Just a few things like parsley, rosemary and thyme." she asked softly.
"Sure thing." the boy said with a smile. He signed the horse to start walking towards the gate.
"Are you sure those bag aren't too heavy for you?" Bazeema asked, looking worried about the weight it could put both his back and the horse's.
Flazino waved a hand as he continued forward, not looking back. "No need to worry, I'm not helpless." he called to her, with a laugh.
He quietly passed through the gates. Looking in all directions to make sure no one else was nearby. Once the coast was clear. The boy said in a low voice, "I'm far from helpless." He tightened the reins and made the horse transition from a gallop to a run.
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The horse reacted and took off at a great speed. Flazino traveled further and further forward until Ross was no longer visible. He traveled for about an hour, passing a giant obnoxious sign of the smug king pointing to the kingdom with a sign that read: "To Rosas: Where all your wishes will come true".
The trees became a blur as he ran through the forest like a ghost. He finally reached the deepest part of the woods, were many branches of trees overlapped each other, as if blocking something from entering.
Flazino reached into one of his bags and pulled out a small green vial, that glowed brightly in his hands. He uncorked the vial and whispered to it in latin: "Ineo."
He threw the liquid at the branch's and waited. The branches started to shake, startling the horse. Flazino patted him on the head. "Easy, Achilles. Nothing to be scared off." ,he comforted the animal. Magnifico may not have taught him much magic like he wished for, but the boy watched and learned whenever the King performed his spells. It payed off rather well for him.
The branches slowly opened up, revealing an entrance to a hidden village within the forest itself.
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The trees closed off the entrance behind him as Flazino slowly entered the safe haven for those who fled from the Royal's tyranny. This was the Hamlet.
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
OH MY GOD, ITS FINALLY DONE! CHAPTER 1 IS HERE AND DONE! AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
Would you believe that this took over a week to do this? This wasn't meant to be that long, but the way I write, everything plays out like a movie, so that's why its a bit longer. 😅 I also chose this way to start it because a majority of rewrites usually start with Asha in some way, so I wanted to do a bit of a twist and start it off through Flazino instead and then lead to Asha.
Another fun thing is that while I haven't read all the rewrites out there (I don't have all that time, unfortunately), but I rarely see Flazino used, if at all. So it was like I was given a clean slate to work with. Plus some people figured out he was helping the Hamlet in the deleted scenes and was the original Sorcerers' Apprentice, which gave me inspiration for this. He's like a double agent in this telling, and he'll be important to the story later on. The design I had in mind for him was a reference to Arthur from The Sword in the Stone, with a bit of Jim Lake from Troll hunters mixed in. Sooooo imagine he's voiced by Josh Keaton, he's a good VA for these types of roles (As you can tell, I may have gotten attached to this guy, lol 😅) So he'll be getting his own bio later on.
And how about those royals, huh? THEY ARE TOTAL GLORY HOGS! 😂 They're incredibly narcissistic in this version, but most people see it as charming and don't catch on. Plus I wanted them to have have the classic Disney broadway sequence during the song, cause I think the movie would've benefited from it. (Flazino is more like a jester to them than an apprentice, hence the Clopin reference.) They put on smiles, act nice and give you the Hollywood treatment, but its all just to get those wishes. There is no redeeming them here, they're villains. Straight up.
Also, BIG thank you to @signed-sapphire for helping me with rewriting the Rosas song too! They gave me a great guide to making new lyrics and it really worked out! And for everyone who took the time to read to this point! You earned a big hug! 😊
It'll be a while before chapter 2, cause I want to finish Kingdom of Wishes first,in case I get more ideas. But for now, feel free to ask any questions on my rewrite and leave as many comments as you want!
Thanks for reading!
@wings-of-sapphire. @oh-shtars @chillwildwave @tumblingdownthefoxden @uva124 @emptyblog7 @emillyverse @mythartist21 @kstarsarts @spectator-zee @gracebethartacc @your-ne1ghbor @kenihewa @lazytitans-world @annymation
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octuscle · 9 months
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Hey bro, whats up? My frat is pretty well known for some of the stuff we put our pledges through. This year we were thinking of using the chronivac to liven things up a bit. Got four eager pledges and we wanted to see if you had any presets or ideas for each of em. Was thinkin' of turning each of em into a different frat bro stereotype, but wanted to get your thoughts on it. Thanks man!
This year you guys need to recruit some of the smart lads. Your academic performance has been so poor the last few semesters that many of your alumni have threatened to cut your allowances. The nerds who applied all have IQs beyond 140, but if they moved into the frat house, they'd have to wear a paper bag on their head all day, they're that ugly. Let's see what we can do with Chronivac.
Richard is the first. The questionnaire is filled out in handwriting, as if a little girl had applied. He has entered a dash for daily hours in the gym. You take over in the Chronivac times "two". The favorite place is the library. You change that to "Halfpipe". And he has entered a visit to the Vatican Library as his dream vacation. You change this to Nazaré.
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Quite a good start… Entrance exam passed. Ryder high-fives you and gets in the car to get his stuff. You are especially looking forward to his supply of first class weed.
Michael comes next. Fuck, he knits his own sweaters. And the dungarees look like they came from a department store. He also entered a dash at the gym classes. You take one. Favorite place is the big oak tree on campus. What a nerd! You'll change that to the men's department at Saks Fifth Avenue. And favorite vacation spot is no longer the Oregon woods. It's Florence for men's fashion week.
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You welcome Miles to your home. And give him the room in the frat house with the biggest closet.
After all, Frederick actually put down "one" in the daily gym classes. But the results of that one hour are well hidden under thick layers of fat. He needs at least two hours so you don't have to be ashamed of him. His favorite place until a few seconds ago was the pastry shop on the main street. How pathetic! You make it the swimming pool on campus in your file. And you turn a chocolatier class in Bruges as a favorite vacation into participation in the World Aquatics Open Water Swimming World Cup.
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Finn is not the emotional type. But you're sure he was happy to be accepted into the frat. Even if the movement of the corner of his mouth was barely visible.
Christian is by far the most intelligent of your pledges. Normally, you would chase him off the fraternity house grounds with water pistols. He tells you that he only applied because his father wanted him to. He thinks you are a miserable bunch of losers. He seriously filled in the questionnaire with hieroglyphics. The devil knows what he wanted to tell you. He sits across from you with his arms crossed in his stuffy clothes and doesn't say a word. Well, then, you just nurse Chronivac for the last new addition to the fraternity. Four hours in the gym, favorite place is his parents' hunting lodge on July 04, and his favorite vacation is Spring Break in South Beach.
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Chase is a hot candidate for fraternity newcomer speaker. A real smart cookie. But most importantly, a fraternity brother with a passion!
Bruhs, I hope you are happy with the new guys. I think they will all be an asset to your fraternity.
The pictures of the improved pledges I found at @stargazerguy, @richmuscly, @swimgod81-blog and @maxx-magnum
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thybrotherskeeper · 3 months
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[Oh, that’s odd. There’s no Michael this time, instead someone else. A certain ex-angel with much darker feathers and a light blue, glowing halo]
[Azrael stared down at Crimson with a look of mostly confusion, though there was also a little pity behind it]
Is no one in this place ever happy or what
[They seemed to mostly say it to themself]
- [Another Set of Eyes]
*Crimson barely glances at this newcomer before letting out an agonized groan and burying its face in its crossed arms, causing its voice to sound even quieter*
{For fuck's sake...}
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thecrownnetflixuk · 6 months
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Fond Farewells Mark the End of an Era for The Crown.
Pt 2 of Season 6 Accedes to the Next Generation – But Reigns Most Triumphant Saluting Its Sovereign.
Review & gifs by L.L @The Crown TV
I wasn't sure what to expect from the final 6 preview episodes of The Crown. Part 1 gifted us with a season-defining performance from Elizabeth Debicki, but such intense focus on the tragedy of Diana and Dodi's deaths was heavy-going. How to move forward?
Not many TV shows stick the landing, but I believe The Crown does, mostly by putting Queen Elizabeth front and centre. In four different ways! But Part 2 takes a while to forge ahead and reign triumphant.
Ed McVey and Meg Bellamy make shy William and swotty Kate believable as a young couple who meet at university – or earlier, as per a flashback with (not Ghost!) Diana. I still found it hard to invest in their will-they-won't-they relationship (we already know they do.) 
Instead, it’s sisters Elizabeth and Margaret who have long been the emotional heart of this show; at every stage of their lives.
Former Oscar-nominee Lesley Manville (alongside Queen Imelda Staunton) is truly magnificent in Ep 8 as Princess Margaret, though it's painful watching this vibrant lady struggle as her health worsens.
Memories of the 1940's are a delight. However, I wish we'd seen more of wide-eyed teen Lilibet let loose (Viola Prettejohn) and carefree Marg (Beau Gadsdon) before older Margaret says her final goodbye.
Staunton saves her best for last, bringing dry humour, vulnerability as well as leadership to Ep 10. The 70+ min epic finale 'Sleep, Dearie Sleep' has its shaky moments, but beautifully completes Queen Elizabeth's story when it counts, bringing near-perfect closure. That alone elevates Season 6 beyond Season 5.
Warning - MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD. This is my final *EVER* review (might be extra long!)
S6 is NOW ON NETFLIX - WATCH THE EPISODES before reading.
Images: courtesy of Netflix
Starting with less good news; the first couple of episodes of Part 2 were my least favourite. Ep 5, 'Willsmania', feels transitional, and a little stuck in the past. Following his mother's death, Prince William (Ed McVey; taking over from younger actor Rufus Kampa) turns inward as he struggles to cope with public attention and grief.
It's an understandable reaction to losing a parent, but Part 1 already spent nearly half a season on Dodi and Diana. It felt like we grieved in real time. As a result, whenever the subject of Diana crops up again in Part 2, it tends to weigh down both pace and narrative.
Ep 6 brings a welcome change of topic. This being The Crown, I'm sure there are critics poised to be offended by Queen Elizabeth's nightmare about Prime Minister Tony Blair being crowned king, but to me, his 'coronation' was hilarious, as was the choir boy singing Blair's cheesy Labour pop anthem.
It felt like deliberate tongue-in-cheek humour, an absurd reminder why monarchy might still be better than populist elected leaders.
I really wanted this episode to work, but it didn't go anywhere, and themes like tradition-vs-modernity were covered more effectively in episodes such as 'Marionettes.' Bertie Carvel has Tony Blair's voice down but suffers from comparisons with Michael Sheen, who was uncanny as the Prime Minister in 3 earlier Peter Morgan projects.
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^ PM Tony Blair. The Women's Institute weren't fans of his grandstanding.
The Crown: The Next Generation fully arrives during Ep's 7, 9 & 10. Some will love it. Those who prefer more historical episodes with broader scope may be disappointed, as the show follows William and Kate through University life in the early 2000's.
The newcomers do bring fresh energy to the show. It helps that they cast Ed McVey and Meg Bellamy, who make a sweet couple as Will and Kate, even if William sometimes comes across as petulant.
Unlike Ed McVey as William, Luther Ford doesn't bear much physical resemblance to Prince Harry, other than red hair. Ford does however put in a good performance as Harry becomes increasingly reckless.
The Crown doesn't hide either Harry or William's bad behaviour. The brothers seem to get on well at the start, but it later seems like they're more at odds. Underneath a lot – a LOT – of boozing, both boys appear quietly screwed-up over their mother's death. Neither of them seem to enjoy playing happy families with Charles, either.
The show mostly concentrates on William and Kate, but there aren't many episodes left to develop a genuine romance. They have potential, but it feels fairly surface level. Suddenly, they rush to move into a house share together when we've barely seen them kiss. They (and we) needed more screen time to really get to know each other.
There's a bigger issue here with Kate's mother, Carole Middleton (Eve Best.) Pushy parent Carole is keen to play matchmaker between her 'commoner' daughter and the young eligible Prince, keeping tabs on William. Carole isn't as conniving, but ... didn't we just watch a similar storyline with Mohamed Al-Fayed/Dodi/Diana in Part 1?
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^ Kate 'n' Will. Her Mum would frame this picture.
Ep 8 'Ritz' plays like a standalone film. Margaret's final story is touching, but upsetting, at times; I was a fan of Diana, yet sobbed as much for Margaret as the credits rolled, even though her eventual death isn't shown. In fact, her final goodbye is sensitively done and stands as a fitting tribute to the princess, as well as to the Queen.
Lesley Manville makes Margaret's predicament so real as her health slowly breaks down. She bounces back from one stroke, then another hits. How awful too for Elizabeth to watch a much-loved sister deteriorate, though it was wonderful to see Lilibet read Margaret a bedtime story. It brought out the warmer side of Staunton's Queen.
The scene where Margaret scalds her feet in the bath is genuinely horrifying. I've suffered from ill health and loss of control myself and this was so much worse. I could feel her pain. That poor woman.
Human moments are where The Crown excels; through this episode, this working-class lass from a council house could somehow relate to a Princess in a palace. Peter Morgan has surely done more to humanise the royal family than any P.R team ever could.
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^ Fans of Margaret (and Lesley Manville) prepare yourselves for her sad final journey.
Onto the big reveal: when I mentioned at the start there are FOUR ways Queen Elizabeth appears – this is what I meant:-
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^ Newcomer Viola Prettejohn plays teenage Princess Elizabeth.
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^ & there's Olivia Colman & Claire Foy alongside older Queen Imelda Staunton.
Satisfyingly, all 3 of The Crown's leading ladies return to close the show. Olivia Colman and Claire Foy each have an additional scene, too (I won't spoil the entire finale, as it covers a lot of ground in over 70 mins, but Olivia and Claire aren't back as 'ghosts.')
As we get older, the ghosts who speak loudest are our own; the former versions of us we berate ourselves with. Not everyone may warm to the Queen (sort of) talking to herself, but personally, I was thrilled to see these talented actors on screen together.
Foy's scene with Staunton is particularly effective, as the younger Queen gives her older self an old-fashioned dutiful talking to. It's somehow also credible that they're aspects of the same person.
It reminded me of Peter Morgan’s 2013 (extraordinary) play, ‘The Audience', which inspired this series, and included scenes where Helen Mirren shared the stage with young Elizabeth. That play is also why this theatre-fan started watching The Crown to begin with, and later went on to create this website.
When Ep 10 finished playing, my Netflix returned itself to Season 1. 60 episodes over 7 years! I will miss the grand scale of The Crown, but appreciate the legacy which remains. Now feels like the right time for this story to end. A full-circle moment in more ways than one.
**Majestic thanks for reading, and to every person who has liked, reblogged, messaged, supported The Crown TV for all these years.
💎♕You each deserve a Crown of your own!♕💎**
N.B: These are my humble opinions at this point in time. No offence is intended. Agreement = lovely; not compulsory. Disagreement = happens; kindly coexist. Ta!
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Summertime Shenanigans-Obey Me X Reader
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Summary: You go to the Celestial Realm on a mission, and end up finding out about a horror occurring all over different afterlives. With Lucifer's upcoming birthday, chaos ensues. Word Count: 6.3k+ Warnings: more than half of this is crack btw. female reader. Religious references. OCs involved, mentions of mythology, very bad representation of a very certian country. very much a Lucifer x reader bc its his birthday <3
post dividers by @saradika-graphics
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You seem to keep finding yourself in the Celestial Realm these days, which makes sense seeing as you did get reincarnated as an angel so it is technically your realm. But still, you've visited the Celestial Realm as an angel way more times than you'd visited the Human Realm as a human.
Nothing but your thoughts occupy you as you climbed over the fence that bordered the official entrance to the Celestial Realm. Technically you could´ve just walked through the gate like a fucking normal person, or y´know used your wings to fly over the massive fence, but climbing was funner.
When you do make it over the fence, you make a beeline for the Celestial Gardens, passing Saint Peter on the way. The man just looks at you and sighs inwardly muttering something about how he was not crucified upside down just to watch some crackhead climb over the gates of heaven, he turns away from you and moves to greet a new arrival, being the nosy fucker that you are, you decide to watch from behind a cloud.
Peter can see you by the way. You're not fooling anyone, he's just choosing to ignore you.
Peter smiles at the young woman with hair as orange as a runny yolk. He nods to her. "Hello, and welcome to Heaven. I'm Saint Peter."
The woman's eyes widen and she looks around. "Heaven? But...that can't....I'm not..-"
Peter sighs, looking at the pendant of Mjölnir around her neck and nodding to himself. "Valhalla is currently under construction, again. We in Heaven have agreed to take all coming to Valhalla and host them for a few weeks until the damage is fixed. Again."
The woman lets her quickened breathing slow down, she mumbles weakly. "O-oh right...thank you...but..Valhalla's damaged, how?"
"Nothing much, just Derek."
"Derek?"
Peter shrugs, you tilt your head from where you're hiding behind your cloud. "He's just some guy. He's been appearing in every plane of Afterlife and, pardon my french, fucking things up."
The woman cracks her knuckles. "But why?"
Peter shrugs, "Because Derek's a dickhead."
"I see...."
Peter hands her a pamphlet before pointing her in the direction of the temporary accomodation set up for Norse Devotees before turning around and yanking the cloud off of you.
"Michael's where he usually is. Also, please stop climbing the fence, you're scaring the doves."
"Who's Derek and what's he got against Valhalla?"
Peter just sighs, "He's from Illinois."
"Understandable. I'm off to go see Michael, Bye Peter!"
"Goodbye MC! Use the gate next time!" Is all Peter shouts after you, before turning and having to explain to another disgruntled newcomer that a man called Derek exists so they have to stay in Heaven for a week.
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After making it to the Celestial Gardens, you find Michael, Jesus and surprisingly, Satan huddled together looking at a crystal ball. You stop in your tracks, "What are you guys doing?"
"Making a gnome." Michael answers at the same time Jesus and Satan say, "Watching people debate theology."
You blink, sitting down in between Jesus and Satan. The former groaning with his head in his hands, exasperation written all over his tanned face, strands of dark wavy hair fall over his expression as eyes as rich as soil squeeze shut. An unusual sight to say the least. "If these people don't stop calling my mother a whore..."
"Yucky." You make a face.
"Very yucky." Michael agrees. "It's a shame we're not allowed to smite humans anymore."
You tilt your head looking at the Archangel. "You'd smite someone for calling another person a whore?"
Michael nods, golden curls and coils bouncing around as he does so, some paper shavings falling out from the confines of the coils like dandruff, ruby red eyes portray seriousness he doesn't normally express as he looks up from where he's giving the gnome insanely big ears. "Well no one messes with Mary."
Jesus nods in agreement.
Satan pats Michael on the shoulder, "Damn straight."
You look between the three, making note of Michael's green robe tied in such a way half of his chest is visible. Said visible skin is covered in glue and paper. "So, why are you torturing a gnome, and why are you guys watching humans debate theology?"
Satan shrugs, watching in the crystal ball as the Jehovah's Witnesses' enter the room to debate. "Funny."
Jesus smiles, "Interesting, but also frustrating."
Michael looks between the two, now attempting to paper maché more hair onto the gnome, in the process somehow getting newspaper stuck to his dark skin. "I'm an artist."
Satan gives you a hug, standing up and stretching his legs. "Well I better get going. If I leave fast enough I won't have to deal with Saint Peter on the way out."
Michael whistles, still not looking up from the gnome. "This about the upside down cross symbol?"
Satan sighs. "Not my fault people think it's my symbol not his...."
Michael discreetly glances over to Jesus who is explaining to you what's been happening in the debate he and Satan were watching. "Well I mean, getting crucified is kind of a bad experience sometimes."
Jesus makes a face at him. Michael raises his hands. "Okay...all the time."
Satan gives his uncle a look before he waves goodbye to you. "See you back at home, yeah?"
"Mhm! But don't tell Lucifer I'm here or I was here."
Satan smirks. "Only if you don't tell him I was here."
"Pinky promise?" You hold your pinky out.
"PInky promise." Satan intertwines your pinkies before waving goodbye to Jesus. "Bye Jesus! Sorry about the whole Desert thing! Bye Michael thanks for the blackmail material."
"Goodbye my favourite nephew!"
"Goodbye Satan." Jesus pauses the crystal ball and smiles kindly at you. "So what brings you to the Celestial Realm?"
You stiffen. "Oh yeah....I need to talk to Michael..."
Michael pauses from where the massive ears for the gnome have broken apart due to their heaviness. "If it's about Derek I already have a meeting with Father, Hera, The Dagda, and Odin later on today about the situation." He drawls boredly, before grinning, "But don't worry, I'll be sure to tell you all the details afterwards!"
You blank, "Well-...uh...it's not about Derek...." Jesus senses some sort of emotional turmoil from you, and places a tanned, scarred hand on your shoulder comfortingly.
Michael pauses from his horrific gnome creation, looking up at you with a raised eyebrow. Ruby red eyes staring into your soul. "Oh...then what's it about? You seem nervous."
Jesus stands up, giving you a pat on the head. "Well I'll give you two your privacy. Good luck with whatever it is, MC." The man gives you a knowing smile before walking away, the sun shining on his dark waves. You watch him leave, missing his comforting presence as you turn your attention onto the Archangel.
Time to ask him the biggest most important question in your afterlife.
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meanwhile...
"Psst, kid. Yo kid." A man wearing a baseball cap asks from the fence bordering heaven, a cherub looks up at him, her small head tilting in confusion.
"Who are you?" She asks, stumbling onto her tiny feet as she walks towards the fence.
"I'm a friend....I got locked out of Heaven on accident and need help getting back in!" The strange man says, running his hands over his buzz cut, he adjusts his Chicago cubs cap. "I just need you to let me in!"
The little girl blinks at him, her small ringlet curls sway slightly in the light breeze as she gets closer to the fence. "But I dunno you...."
The man's lips tighten for a moment before morphing into a smile. "But I'm your friend! Are we not friends?" He says, allowing his face to fall into a sad expression.
The little girl looks up at him, still a few yards away from the fence, just out of arm's reach of the man. "My daddy sayed I'm not allowed to talk to strangers...."
"Oh really?" The wolfish man smiles. "And who's your daddy?"
"God!" She grins. "Well so is my other daddy and mummy but they're still on earth!"
God? He pales. "Oh...right....Well I'm still your friend, aren't I?" He reaches a hand through the fence, he needed to get into heaven for his plan God Dammit! The hand inches closer to the cherub.
"What's going on here?" A voice cuts through the silence along with tanned skin and ash-blond hair. The man retracts his hands from through the fence immediately.
"Oh...just got lost and couldn't find the main gates!....I was trying to get help...!...Is all..."
Raphael nods slowly, looking from the man to the cherub. "So you asked a cherub?"
"She was the only person I'd saw!"
"Guards patrol around the perimeter of the realm. Surely you could've flagged down one of them?"
"O-oh."
Raphael's lips twitch upwards slightly in something that could hardly be described as a smile. "No problem. I can direct you to where you need to go." The angel's hand twitches and a spear starts to materialise.
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"Hey Michael can I borrow that sellotape for a second?"
"Sure! What for?" Michael tilts his head, still waiting on this very important thing you're supposed to be asking him.
You whsitle, pulling up your shirt and sellotaping under your breast on the left side of your ribs, where your pact mark with Lucifer is. "I can't risk Luci finding this out yet...."
Michael raises an eyebrow playfully.
"So basically...I uh...I kind of need to ask you something..."
Michael grins, red eyes sparkling. "You can ask me anything MC!"
"I...I need your blessing."
"My blessing?" Michael's brows furrow confusedly. "For what?"
"Well you see...."
You explain, and upon seeing Michael's darkening expression, you nearly gulped.
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Raphael sighed in annoyance. The strange man had booked it and ran away, leaving him with the cherub, he stiffens slightly as he meets her big hazel eyes.
"...Hello."
"Hi! I know you! You're Raphael!"
Raphael nods. "Yes I am."
The cherub grins, her chubby cheeks making her eyes crinkle slightly. "I'm Evangeline! But I can't spell that so I just write Eva!"
The Archangel nods awkwardly, attempting to smile at the child. "Well that's great, Evangeline....I need to get back to the Celestial Palace...." The man says and begins walking, the child starts walking with him.
"That's fun! Do you always have spears with you?"
"Yes." Raphael answers disjointedly.
"Wow! I always wanted to hold a spear! Can I hold your spear Mr Raphael?"
"That would be dangerous, Evangeline." He answers awkwardly.
The child pouts. "Aw, okay!"
A moment of silence.
The cherub tugs on his trouser leg. "How come your hair's all grey?"
"It just is, I guess."
"But why?"
"God made me that way I suppose." He replies awkwardly.
"Okay!" Evangeline grinned. "God made me with weird eyes! Sometimes they look more green or more brown!"
Raphael blinks, this child was almost as socially inept as Michael. "That's because your eyes are hazel."
This was going to be a long walk.
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Michael glares at you, straightening his shoulders to make them seem broader, and even with the mess of paper stuck to his skin and face, he still looks threatening.
As unusually serious as you'd ever seen him, it almost hurts to keep his gaze.
He's stopped his arts and crafts and instead focuses all of his attention on you. "I'm going to need you to repeat that, MC."
You audibly gulp.
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Lucifer sighs from where he's seated in the student council room. The paperwork feeling more suffocating than usual. Almost as if someone had taped over his mouth and nose very badly. The door creaks open and he looks up to see Mammon.
The Avatar of Greed looks around the room before cursing and turning to walk out again.
"Mammon."
"Oh hiya Lucifer!" Mammon says, looking disgruntled.
"What are you doing." Lucifer sighs, knowing better than to frame it as a question.
"Lookin' for MC. Can't find'er anywhere...."
The first born sits up straighter, something flashing in his ruby eyes. "You can't find MC?"
"Nope. And I've checked ev'rywhere! Even the fuckin' attic. I asked Beel but he said he hasn' saw'er since this mornin'."
Lucifer feels something swirl in his chest. "I'll ask Diavolo."
"Thanks...Me and Beel are teamin' up and lookin' around the classrooms."
Lucifer pinches his hooked nose.
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Diavolo sits in the meeting room of the palace, a man of granduer sits across from him. Long silvery hair frames his timeworn face, a well groomed beard grows from his face, as he enjoys a cup of Barbatos' tea.
Diavolo's brows furrow. "I just don't see us being able to do anything about it without potentially hurting our already strained relationship with the Human Realm."
The man nods, glancing down at his coarse hands with his one eye. He speaks with a Scandinavian accent. "Those were our thoughts as well. Killing him could be a bad diplomatic move."
The Demon Prince nods gravely to the God. "I heard from my meeting with Helios that this mortal journeyed into realms unknown and came out...different."
Odin scratches his chin in thought. "I say we find a way to trap him." He closes his eye. "I do believe this figure was spotted outside of the Celestial Realm."
Diavolo nods seriously, a small grin on his face. "Well at least we know the general area he's in."
"But you and I both know we can't kill him without the high possibility of it backfiring on us." The Revered warrior attests.
Diavolo nods in agreement before a knock on the door is heard. The Demon Prince stands up, excusing himself to open the door, revealling a frazzled Lucifer.
"Oh hello Lucifer, what's the matter?"
"I apologise for interrupting Lord Diavolo but have you seen MC? We believe she's gone missing..."
Diavolo's eyes widen in worry. "No, have you tried calling her?"
Lucifer shakes his head, Odin regards the scene with vague interest. "Goes to voicemail, she isn't receiving our texts either."
Diavolo sitffens.
"If I may interject, MC is the human-turned-angel who managed to keep her pacts even after her rebirth?" The Norse God asks.
Lucifer nods.
"Well then, she's in the Celestial Realm right now with Archangel Michael."
"Thank you. Thank you." The Avatar of Pride says breathlessly. Youre safe, possibly scheming, but you're safe. "How did you know that?"
Odin points to his eye, or lack thereof.
"Oh right...wisdom..." Lucifer blinks, the adrenaline wearing off making it easier to think straight and also feel shame. "Well thank you Odin and Diavolo. I apologise for interrupting."
Diavolo grins. "It's never an interruption if it's about MC's safety."
Lucifer leaves, shutting the door gently behind him, Diavolo and the Mighty Odin continue their discussion.
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Speaking of your safety, you're not exactly feeling very safe right now. You should make a wikihow article called 'How to Turn Archangel Michael into a Feral Beast in Literally One Sentence!'
Said Archangel has his narrowed eyes on you. "Lucifer is my baby brother...."
"He's thousands of years old if you think about it." You smile awkwardly.
"Still just a baby."
"He's the Avatar of Pride! LIterally the Demon Prince's Righthand man!"
"And that's a great preschool activity." Michael huffs.
You sigh, looking down at the spear currently being pointed at you neck. Michael makes a sound akin to a snarl. "Look MC. I know that Lucifer is his own person. I know that even though he's still an edgy little teenager slash toddler in my eyes he is technically an adult. But he's still my baby brother."
The Archangel lowers his spear, turning around, golden coils bouncing as he does so, almost deflating with him. "He's just....those two minutes spent without him were the hardest two minutes of my life...except of course the multiple minutes in the Great Celestial War."
You walk closer to Feral Michael, who turns back around to face you, a fire in the crimson eyes he shares with his twin brother. "I know he's all grown up now, but he's still my baby brother, and I know that you're one of my closest friends MC."
He closes the distance between you, cornering you into a tree. Face stony and grave. "But so help me God, if you ever do anything to hurt him....and I don't mean having a simple argument or whatever...If you ever truly do something to hurt him...you're going to wish there was a realm out there that could shield you from me."
He pauses, moving away from you and grinning his usually playful grin. "Are we understood."
He wasn't asking.
"Yes. Very understood." You nod. "I would never hurt Luci like that....ever...."
The blond pulls one of his golden curls so it stretches completely straight before letting go and watching it coil back up again. "Well....I'm sorry I went all...like that on you...big brother instincts?"
You shrug. "Reminds me of Lucifer that one time this witch genuinely threatened Mammon with a grimoire. That shit was brutal."
"Must've been." Michael whistles. "So...have you decided how you're going to do it?"
"Well sort of...but I was hoping you'd help me shop for the ring?"
Michael's grin widens.
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Derek Wisconsin made it away just barely with his life. He had almost convinced that little girl to let him into the Celestial Realm! He really almost did! But then that Seraph (or was he an Archangel?) guy Raphael just had to stop him!
He pants, beads of sweat running down his forehead. Taking off his Chicago Cubs cap and sighing in relief at the feeling of a free bald buzzcut head.
Derek groans, peeling off sunburnt skin while the door creaks open. He never should've went to somewhere as sunny as the Celestial Realm without putting sunscreen on first.
Derek might've been one millionth-gazillionth italian but he definitely did not tan like one. When he was in the sun he burned more than a petrol fire on a hot summer's day. There must be ginger genes in him somewhere.
"Derek. You need to stop this. All of this attempted destruction of the afterlife....it's...it's not right Derek." A voice sounds behind him. Another man, with an identical buzzcut and baseball hat, except this man had glasses.
"Shut up Eric." Derek grunts. "I'm doing what has to be done so the cubs win every match they play."
"You're doing this for baseball?" Eric asks, adjusting his glasses further up his nose.
"Baseball is our life Eric."
"No. Baseball is your life, Derek. I like ice hockey better and you know it!" Eric bites his bottom lip, arms crossed over his chest as he looks at his friend.
"That's just because you're half Canadian." Derek scoffs. "Go listen to Justin Beiber you race traitor."
"American isn't a race, Derek."
Eric looks at his friend, before taking off his hat. "You can have your spare fucking hat back, Derek." The half Canadian reaches the door before turning around. "Oh and by the way, Justin Beiber fucking sucks. Canadians don't claim him."
The door slams shut.
Derek is left in silence.
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Evangeline giggles, climbing around Raphaels shoulders, he winces and brings up an uncertain hand to stabilise her. With one leg on each shoulder and Raphael holding both of her legs for stability the little angel cheers.
"Wow! I'm so high up! I'm so high up! Do ya see me?!"
"Yes....I see you." The angel nods slowly, continuing his now very delayed walk to the Celestial Palace.
"I love being up high! I can't wait till my wings grow some more and then I can fly!"
"..I'm sure you'll be a good flyer." The ashy haired angel grunts out awkwardly.
"Yay!"
Forget almost dying in the Great Celestial War, this was the scariest moment of his life.
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You blink at Michael's retracting form. He sat you down on a bench and gave you crayons and a colouring book, before telling you to wait on him finishing this meeting about that one guy Derek.
You sigh and begin colouring in a picture of a clown and making it Michael. Fuck that guy, you're not a kid!
Upon hearing footsteps you look up. "Oh hey Raphael! Who's the kid?"
"I'm Evangeline!" The cherub grins fidgeting and manuevering herself off of Raphael's shoulders and waddling up to you. "Who are you?"
"I'm MC, I'm Raphael's friend!" You smile at the child. Raphael gives you a grateful look. You never knew he could be that expressive.
"Me too! I'm Mr. Raphael's bestest ever friend!" The girl grins excitedly, swinging while standing, going back and forth to leaning on her heels then to leaning on her tiptoes.
"Well! I'm happy to hear that Evangeline! Would you like to do some colouring in?"
"Yes please!"
Raphael sits beside you, feeling the need to worship the ground you walk on. His ordeal of dealing with a child is over.
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After a very enlightening zoom call meeting and bidding goodbye to Odin. Diavolo calls a very spooky number.
The phone is answered a crackly voice speaks through it.
"I need your help. We know where Derek is staying but as Gods, Angels and Demons....we can't kill him...but you can."
A chuckle crackles through the phone speaker. "Send me his Location. I'll see what I can do."
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[A Week or So Later....]
Derek wipes the sweat off of his brow as he begins his operation. Making bombs that aren't molotov cocktails is very difficult, thank god for Wikihow.
Unfortunately setting them down strategically in order to blow up the Celestial Realm is quite difficult.
"You seem to be having some troubles with that." A voice cuts through the silence.
"Oh yeah I am-" Derek begins before turning around and staring wide-eyed at the ivory-haired intruder like a deer in headlights. He immediately stands up. "Who are you?"
"The name's Solomon." The sorcerer gives the man a closed mouth smile. "Normally I don't interfere with the business of the Celestial Realm...but seeing as they asked, and a very close friend of mine is an angel, and also seeing as I think baseball is largely pointless...I don't think it's a very logical gameplan to let you live..."
Derek splutters. "Y-you can't!"
Solomon opens his eyes, something unreasonable in those ocean blue irises. "Oh but I can!" He grins. "It's one thing to try and destroy things, it's another to attempt to blow up multiple plains of existence with bombs you made using a WIkihow tutorial just because of baseball."
"I-...I just!" Derek backs away, Solomon follows, absentmindedly using magic to disable every bomb.
"You just what? We know you're from Illinois, but have some sense Derek." Solomon shakes his head. "You are the worst stereotype of Americans I've ever seen. I looked into your file. Your surname is literally Wisconsin."
Derek grunts. "You don't understand my passion. I'll kill everyone for those baseballers."
"You've killed several people after highjacking a bus in the Human Realm. You're a danger to yourself and others. Plus you've one too many jokes about teenage girls 'doing it better'. Bye bye Derek." Solomon gives him another closed eye smile, humming over the screaming and the sound of crackling flames.
When all is done and gone, the sorcerer takes out his DDD, alerting the others that it's been taken care of.
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[Yet another Week Later...]
A flash of celestial light bounces off of every wall and surface in your room. You yelp, ivory wings and golden halo jutting out in your startledness. Did you do this? No. You couldn't have. Maybe subconsciously..? How were you going to explain a flash of celestial light to Lucifer? He was going to kill you! Maybe not kill just yet seeing how he reacted the first time you died. But! You were an angel now, which meant no more fragile human body, which meant Lucifer would hypothetically have no qualms stringing you up! Oh God this was it wasn´t it? You were going to-
The light dims, clearing completely, a silhouette appears in its wake. Phew! Guess it wasn't you nearly exorcising everyone in the House of Lamentation then. (Even though it wouldn't exorcise anyone anyway seeing as that wasn't how demons worked. But hey, you were disoriented.) Your relief was short lived, seeing as there was actually someone in your room.
You grab your lamp and hold it up like its a baseball bat. You were prepared to swing, what you weren't prepared for however; was the figure racing towards you. You screech as you're pulled into a bone-crushing hug. Your grip on the lamp relaxes and so do you when you realise just who it is.
"Michael?! What the fuck are you doing here?!" You hiss. "You scared the life out of me!"
Michael loosens his grip, his signature grin on his handsome face, crimson eyes shining. "I don't think you'd die that easily a second time. And besides, I have actual proper serious business this time."
You step out of the hug. Giving him an indignant look as he gets distracted with your room, he walks to your wall, stepping over the bag he brought with him and begins making what can only be described as his 'Lucifer Impression' in your mirror, which was essentially him scrunching up his face so he looked constipated then waggling his ring adorned finger in disapproval.
"You're here for serious reasons. You?"
"Well you didn't have to say it like that." Michael remarked, turning around to face you so fast you get whiplash, so does Michael apparently. His golden curls had been done up in intricate braids, with rose gold braiding rope helping to keep half of it up and away from his face, he'd added jewels and gems in charms hanging from the braids themselves, a fact he seemed to have forgotten until, with the force and speed he twisted his head at, his hair swung back and then forward again, hitting him right square in the mouth. You snorted.
He glares at you. "Don't laugh! Do you know how long I had to sit still for to get these?! 12 hours! I am so lucky I'm not tender-headed!"
"Holy fuck?! 12 hours?! And now they're attempting to assassinate you." You nod dutifully, "Atleast they're pretty."
"Pretty is the least they could be. Especially when Raphael almost poked my eye out when he was measuring the braiding rope. So not only is my hair trying to assassinate me, so is Raphael!" Michael said, sitting on your bed cross-legged, smoothing out the non-existent wrinkles in his white gold accented blazer suit that looked suspiciously similar to Lucifer's. Damn twins.
You paused. "Raphael does your hair?"
Michael smiles, "Oh yeah! It's his secret hobby! So don't tell anyone!" The Archangel closes his eyes, as if imagining an era long passed. "He saw me and Lucikins trying to do Lilith's hair once and was sold."
You don't comment on the dopey expression. Michael continues. "Raphael never liked playing most games. He's like Lucikins in that way. They both think they're so grown up....He was normally with Simeon writing their little short stories together, seeing as they're both the nerdiests nerds of all the nerds...but he did see the end result of me and Luci braiding flowers into Lilith's hair...we did it with Asmo too, to cheer him after he nearly fell through a cloud. Cue the next day, Raphael asking to do my hair. Being the amazing big brother I was- I accepted!" Michael makes a face. "I think that was the first time I felt true fear."
You laughed evilly. "I should do your hair sometime."
The way Michael looks at you is akin to a deer in headlights. "Absolutely not. One adorable maniac obsessed with spears doing my hair is enough for me thank you very much. I do not need two."
"What if Luke asked?" You tilt your head.
"Jokes on you MC! Luke already likes to do my hair! He puts clips and flowers and bows and all in it!" Michael sticks out his tongue.
"Oh I cannot wait to see that." You grin.
Michael gives you another look, with his ruby red eyes looking so disapprovingly, the resemblance between his younger brother, (by two whole minutes!; he'd add gloatingly at any other time) is uncanny.
You put your hands up defensively. Deciding changing the topic would be a good idea seeing as you would like to not die a second time, (technically a third if you count Belphie.) so, you tilt your head. "You never told me what you were actually doing here."
"Oh yeah!" Michael nods. "Thanks for reminding me." He moves to grab the bag from the center of the room where he appeared. You forgot about that bag.
"Michael I swear to God if you've put a live pigeon in there I'm going to scream." You whisper frightendly.
The Archangel arks his head up to you in a flash, wincing when a braid hits him across the mouth again. He raises an eyebrow. "No? Why would I have a pigeon?"
You sigh in relief. "I had a dream last night that Pigeons caused the Second Coming of Christ."
Michael chuckled. "Second Coming of Christ doesn't exist, MC. I just got bored while John of Patmos was writing the Book of Revelation. Thought it'd be nice to set up for a sequel."
You blink. "How are you not a demon?"
"I dunno. Didn't really feel like it at the time. The lack of sunlight in the Devildom makes me depressed. Plus I'd rather not take vitamin D pills, it seems like so much work." Michael shrugged.
Made sense. "So what's in the bag?"
Michael grins excitedly, if he had a tail it would be wagging like a helicopter and knocking everything in your room that wasn't nailed to the surfaces down. "Well! My most amazingest underling! Can you tell me what date it is?"
"June 5th?"
"Which as you know, is the eve of the best and worst day in history."
You raise a brow. "Best and worst?"
"Best because it's the day I was born, worst because 2 minutes later my lovely adorable little baby brother was born." He laughs.
"If Lucifer ever heard you calling him your lovely adorable little baby brother I think he'd start a war."
"How do you think the War of the Bucket started?"
"Excuse me?"
Michael doesn't answer any of your questions, and instead chooses to finally show what's in the bag. A gnome.
Not just any gnome oh no. One that looked suspiciously like it was made by the same person who made the suspiciously bad looking gnome that looked like Michael that Mammon would hide the spare key to the backdoor of the House of Lamentation behind.
This one however did not have Michael's dark skin, or the horrible neon yellow hair painted on. Oh no, this one had pale skin, another DnD-esque cape on, except with the vampire looking collar, it had black hair with shiny metalic silver streaks in it. So that was the gnome Michael was torturing.
You hold back your laughter. "...Why?..."
"It's a birthday gift MC, you know? the things people give to other people on their birthdays? I mean you look a bit dim, you might not've heard of it."
"Did you-" You try to hold back your cackling. "Did you use clay-" You nearly double over, suddenly your knees feel quite weak. "Did you use clay to...-make Lucifer's ears...-massive?-"
"Why yes I did, and thank you for noticing!"
"Kind of hard not to notice them."
Michael grins, "Wanna help me sneak it into his office?"
You perk up. "Do I ever?!"
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Lucifer always finds himself quite melancholy on his birthday. Somehow the date always enjoys to remind him of his first brother. Not that he doesn't miss the idiots he lives with now. If he looks at Satan attempting to annoy him every waking hour in enough of a squint, it almost feels as if Michael is in the Devildom.
Speaking of; it really feels like Michael is in the Devildom today.
Lucifer shrugs it off. As it was his birthday he allowed himself a lie-in. Barbatos had eased his workload for the surrounding week, something Lucifer was quite grateful of.
Sighing, he walked slowly from the kitchen, coffee cup in hand; he might as well get his paperwork done now so he can spend the rest of the day with his loved ones before maybe he'd let Cerberus out of the underground tomb and into his room to sit by him whilst he listened to cursed records and enjoyed a finely aged bottle of demonus. (Not that Cerberus was a pet! Or that he was pampered! He was purely a guard dog! Stop suggesting otherwise Simeon, Barbatos, Diavolo and probably even Michael! Lucifer was not soft!)
The planning of what was essentially his day off was just prolonged enough that he was snapped out of his thoughts once he reached the door to his office.
Upon opening it, he wished he hadnt.
Atop his desk sits the most blasphemous rendition of him he's ever seen, that's including every lifetime christian movie that thinks he and Satan are the same person.
The gnome wasn't hand crafted but it was certainty hand-edited. It was an ugly thing, though, the more Lucifer looked at it, the more innocently charming it became, but in an ugly way.
He'd place it beside the Michael Gnome tonight, at least the ugly blasphemous gnome version of himself could be with his ugly blasphemous twin's gnome version of himself.
As he went to move it off of his desk, he noticed the note attached to the gnome's leg.
To my adorable little baby brother,
Lucifer's eye twitched. Had Michael still not learnt to call him that? Even after the War of the Bucket?! Even after the Emu War?! He was going to rip that Angel's head clean off.
You're so lucky to share a birthday with me! How unfortunate you were a late show, tut tut tut. Should've been born quicker, Lucikins. :o
Lucifer's wings and horns popped out. 'Lucikins?' That nickname again? Oh, Michael was a dead man.
I know you'll love my present. The gnome looks just like you! Though sadly, I ran out of clay so I couldn't make the ears any bigger.
Unconsciously, Lucifer reached up to cover his ears, but caught himself. Damned Michael! Their ears are literally the same size! He takes a deep breath.
Anyway, happy birthday my adorable, squishy cheeked, starry eyed, little baby brother! Maybe one day you'll grow up to be big and strong just like your big bro! Lots of Love to my baby brother: Michael xoxo
Lucifer felt rage course through his body at such a rate, he had to turn around to make sure he didn't pop out another Satan. Thank Diavolo he didn't. If he did, Michael was taking them home.
Fine. If Michael wanted to hide in the Devildom, call his ears big, and then insist that Lucifer was his 'baby brother' despite the fact he was barely even two minutes older!--then Lucifer wasn't going to sit idly by.
He takes his DDD out of his pocket. Cue the dramatic music.
"Hello, Luke? Can you pass the phone to Simeon please? Yes Thank you." Lucifer pauses, hearing rustling and then finally Simeon's voice on the other end of the DDD. "Hello Simeon. How would you like to travel with me to the Celestial Realm, I fear I haven't been in a while."
Simeon pauses. "...Why?..."
Lucifer swallows thickly, a smirk overtaking his features. "I'm planning on paying Michael a visit."
"He gave you another gnome didn't he?"
"...Okay. Goodbye Simeon."
"No way...He did!"
"Goodbye Simeon." By the time Lucifer hangs up, he can hear the angel laughing on the other end of the phone.
The Avatar of Pride sits down on his chair, covering his face in his hands he grinned. Oh he is so going to enjoy getting Michael back for this one.
And hey, if a few garden flamingos with golden wigs and DnD-esque capes are sighted around the celestial realm later on today. What a coincidence!
Lucifer chuckles heartily. He missed this.
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Just as the Avatar of pride is resting, a knock sounds on his door.
"Come in." He sighs, eyes lighting up slightly when he sees that it's you. "Oh hello, Dearest."
You approach his desk, giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek, smiling slightly when you feel his face heat up. "Happy birthday Luci...wanna come on a walk with me?"
"Sure. Let me grab my coat."
And so it goes.
After about twenty minutes of walking through the park hand in hand with Lucifer, you stop at a fountain. "Woah is that fish in there?"
"Hmm?" Lucifer looks over to you.
"Luci can you see fish in the fountain? I think my mind is playing tricks on me..."
Lucifer raises a brow, but always willing to please you, he looks into the fountain, some strands of ebony hair falling over his face at the movement.
"There aren't any fish, MC...I think you might need sleep-" Lucifer drawls as he begins to turn around to face you. Stopping abruptly when he sees you down on one knee, a ring in your hand.
"MC..." He says breathlessly, heart thumping out of his chest.
"Lucifer, the Morningstar, the Avatar of Pride...will you make me the happiest being in all three realms and marry me?"
"MC...I-...You...-...Yes, I'd carve the word into my flesh if I had to..."
You grin, tears welling up in your eyes as you take off Lucifer's glove and slide the ring onto his finger. He helps you up and pulls you into his arms. Face buried into your neck.
"This will mean that you're mine...just like our pact..." He smiles into your collarbone, placing small kisses here and there.
You laugh. "Sure, Luci sure."
Two lovers hold each other in a gentle embrace, witnessed only by themselves and the moon. No granduer, no dramatic announcement, just lying about fish in a fountain.
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i cant write proposals BUT as a special birthday bonus: the gnomes.
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i was originally just gonna do lucifer but they're twins so I had to do both of them.
in the original fic with the michael gnome i said he had neon hair but i have no idea how to neonify hair and am not an artist so L, have cursed gnomes.
as you can see i can colour inside the lines. and also i hate the fill tool.
before we start:
yes i am posting this on the 5th and i do know that Luci's birthday is the 6th, but i got this done early and have the patience of a child on christmas😔✊
yes derek and eric are dumb stereotypes. everyday im amazed that baseball is literally just rounders with a different name and more theatrics. anyway, i enjoy writing americans the way americans write us. i picked illinois because thats the first state that popped into my head, and also its easy to spell so.
im friends with like three people from canada and im scared of all of them.
anyway grma for reading and i promise the next fic i do for someones birthday i will actually include them in it more.😔✊<3
22 notes · View notes
harunayuuka2060 · 2 years
Text
Michael: Alright, MC. One final question before you get accepted here at Celestial Realm.
MC: ...
Michael: What will you do if you are in the face of danger and death?
MC: ...
MC: Chill.
Michael: Oh my... That's sexy.
Michael: Congratulations! You are accepted!
MC: ...
MC: *unenthusiastic* Yay.
Raphael: Hmm... That newcomer seems bored.
Simeon: You mean MC? *chuckles* Well they are.
Raphael: Huh?
Simeon: Nothing seems to excite them.
Michael: *bugging MC* Oh sweet darling~ Let's eat lunch together~!
MC: ...
MC: No.
Simeon and Raphael: ...
Simeon and Raphael: *laughs*
595 notes · View notes
kissagii · 1 year
Text
diamond-studded delights
michael kaiser x gn!mikage!reader ; wc 1.7k
tw: kaiser exists. references to reader getting insulted. cursing. pet names used: pretty, darling.
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There are three kinds of people present at business galas. Firstly, the old, rich, notorious entrepreneurs that could be a business’ savior or its downfall. Second, the young entrepreneurs, fresh on the scene and desperate to suck up to a rich executive and get a business deal. And third, the begrudgingly attending spouses and children only there to add to the chatter and be something for the old men to brag about. You and your brother fall into the third group - you the heir in name, and him the heir in practicality.
Business was never your goal in life, so your role at the galas amounted to looking pretty, chatting up older women to keep them entertained, and disappointing business executives that were scandalized by the thought of an eldest child uninterested in the empire they were set to inherit. 
This particular gala is shaping up to be nothing out of the ordinary – you’re dressed to the nines in classic navy and silver, not a hair out of place. Your mother’s friends shower you with compliments, calling you charming and mature and pretty, and their husbands look at you with pure disdain.
You can sort every attendee into one of the three groups as soon as you see them. Except for one, a young man whose two-toned hair and lack of a jacket immediately piques your interest. Just who does he think he is? Whoever he is, he’s new, and you want to know more.
As the chatter builds around you and the music is drowned out, you approach the newcomer. Your question is simple - “You’re new, aren’t you?”
“Do you make it a habit to keep tabs on all your guests like this?” The young man turns on his heel, blonde hair fluttering around his shoulders. His eyes are a striking blue, lined in deep black and vibrant orange, and his black shirt is almost scandalously unbuttoned. He’s  pretty, you have to admit, but at the same time clearly destined for trouble.
“Who are you with?” You ask bluntly. Foreigners like him are a rare sight at these events, and as far as you remember, none of the European executives had sons. 
“Oh, you don’t know me?” He smiles cruelly at you, almost as cruel as his silken voice. “Michael Kaiser, with the Blue Lock project.”
Blue Lock. You know that project all too well – it had swallowed up your brother just a few months ago, and your father insisted on funding it. 
Before you can mention that you haven’t actually heard of him, he’s walking towards the party with long, languid strides. He stops beside you, lowering his voice to whisper in your ear. “If you’ll excuse me, I have some old geezers to flatter. Money doesn’t grow on trees.”
This is where the conversation should end, you know that. He’s some soccer star (you assume) here to charm old men into funding his career and probably cause trouble in the process. But still you call after him – “You won’t make any connections looking like that, you know.”
Kaiser turns slowly back to face you, that stupid cruel grin plastered across his face once more. “Oh? And what do you suggest I do, then?”
“Go to the restroom, wash your eyes, fix your hair, button your shirt, and pray that nobody remembers what you looked like before. Going around like that will only start a scandal and I’d rather not spend my time picking up after you.” You look him straight in the eyes as he slowly approaches you, steps calculated like a hunter approaching its prey. You don’t scare me, your eyes say, so don’t think you can walk over me so easily.
Suddenly you’re very aware of how close he’s standing – close enough that you can smell his earthy cologne and see the flecks of green and gray in his eyes. Close. Too close.
“And have you considered that I don’t want to change that?” He croons, voice soft, emphasizing how very, very close he stands.
You take a step back, praying he can’t hear your heart hammering in your chest. “Then go ahead, run your funding attempts into the ground. I don’t care.”
Again, that grin. That cocky grin of a man who knows he can get exactly what he wants, no matter what it may be. He steps toward you again, a ring-wearing finger hooking under your chin and pulling you close. “Don’t act so apathetic, pretty. I see how you look at me, undressing me with those eyes of yours. I know you love it.”
The breath hitches in your throat, and for a moment, your heart ceases to beat. Any words that form in your mind fall silent on your tongue, and you stare at Kaiser, completely speechless. This bastard sees right through me. His eyes glimmer at the sight of you silenced.
“See what I mean? Now come on, let’s go outside, since you clearly don’t want me in here with everyone else. That’s a bit selfish of you, don’t you think? Wanting me all to yourself?” His finger on your chin pulls you closer to him, his breath fanning over your face. Close. Too close.
You stumble back sharply, heartbeat pulsing in your ears. “You’re delusional.”
“You tell yourself that,” Kaiser says, stepping beside you, his shoulder against yours. “I’ll see you outside, pretty.”
There’s absolutely no reason to even consider following him. In fact, you should be glad that he’s leaving, taking his arrogant and flirtatious attitude outside where he won’t bother you or any of the other gala guests.  And yet you still think about how easy it would be to follow him out the doors, to escape the chatter, stuffy small talk, and disdainful glances. It almost sounds like a good idea.
With a steadying breath you begin wandering through the crowds once more in search of a conversation to start. Has it always been this noisy? Have the people always been this close together? You don’t want to be in this room any longer, it’s too restrictive. Like you’re being crushed by the very atmosphere. Leaving – following Kaiser – is a recipe for scandal. But a scandal in the form of Michael Kaiser is too tempting to resist. 
Your legs take you there before you can fully think through your choice, the hot summer night a refreshing break from the cacophony inside. And there in the garden Kaiser is waiting, leaning against a wall, poised to see you the moment you walk out the doors. 
“I knew you’d come, pretty.” He said as he strode over to you. Even in the darkness his eyes sparkle sapphire blue, reflective like the gemstones on his cufflinks, dark lashes casting shadows over his face. “Just admit it, you’re losing your control.”
No matter how right he was, you wouldn’t let him know. “Me, losing my control? Come on, don’t act like you weren’t waiting for me like a dog waiting for its owner. You’re just as desperate.”
“And if I said I wanted you? What then?” His arm snakes not-so-subtly around your waist, “What will you do, darling?”
Words are overrated, you decide abruptly, pressing your lips against his. Your hand rests on the blue roses inked onto his neck, pulling him into you. He kisses you back with a passionate fervor, chasing your lips when you pull back. In the mere moment that your skin is against his, every ounce of breath is stolen from your lungs, heart racing and mind begging for more.
 Kaiser is poison. But he tastes oh so good.
Who can blame you for wanting to go back for more?
“Let’s get out of their view,” He whispers, guiding you away from the doors, deeper into the garden where you are safe from prying eyes. In this corner of the world it’s just you, Kaiser, and the crickets chirping in the warm summer air
The moment you’re far enough away from everyone else, he’s on you again, all lips and hands and ardent passion. You can taste the remnants of the pomegranate-ginger party drinks on his tongue as it passes by your lips, hungry for more of you; you lean into him without hesitation, as desperate for him as he is for you. He’s a horrible decision, but a horrible decision never tasted so good.
He whispers your name when he finally separates his lips from yours, the word rolling so sensually off his tongue. When’d he learn that? It hardly matters, though, because he’s said it and all you want is for him to say it again. And that he does, bringing his lips to your ear, “Fuck, I want you so bad.”
Maybe words aren’t so overrated after all. Because those words are the final drop in the cup that breaks the surface tension – there’s no going back now. You want him and he wants you, and the world’s opinions be damned, you’ll kiss that stupid soccer player in the shadows of your father’s business gala if it’s the last thing you do. You’ll kiss away any thought he has that isn’t you, you’ll let him dishevel your clothes and hair, you’ll explore every facet of him while the night grows late and the last traces of daylight vanish into inky blackness.
“You’re like a fucking diamond,” he murmurs breathlessly between kisses, “Sparkly and tantalizing and so damn unbreakable. Do you know what you do to me? Playing hard to get and acting like you can’t fucking stand me.”
You pull your face away, fingers tangled in his hair preventing him from leaning into you. Despite the darkness you can tell his face is flushed a warm and pretty pink. For such a cocky bastard, he sure looks pathetic, pulling against your grip in an effort to get close to you once more.
 “Hmm… how about you show me? Make sure I understand?” You can’t help but smile as you egg him on, giving him the opportunity to do what he’s oh so good at – getting what he wants.
His reply is whispered, hurried, breathless, and desperate: “Fuck, just kiss me again.”
You indulge him.
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i hate that he has such a strong grip on me
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