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#lmao please interact with this i spent so much time on it
rosielav · 1 year
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Rosie's Favorite (currently finished/caught up) Podcasts:
The Amelia Project - silly, quirky, morbid but almost always more jaunty and eccentric than completely dark. Great for anyone who loves 'narrator' or interview type podcasts. If I'm not mistaken, I've posted some of my thoughts on here using the pod's hashtag.
The Mistholme Museum of Mystery, Morbitity, and Mortality - another narrator type podcast, and probably my favorite of all time. The main voice you hear is perfect imo and keeps you engaged in all the right ways, bringing tension where it's needed, and levity where it's funny or odd. Absolutely consumed this podcast with a voraciousness I haven't felt for a bit. Keeps you guessing and always wanting more from every exhibit.
Victoriocity - excellent voice acting, interesting and unique premise and setting, and great plot. One of the podcasts I'm most looking forward to returning :) think steam punk but also it's the 1800s still in weird ways. If you love an old timey British accent, you'll love this haha.
The White Vault - probably my favorite specifically horror podcast, that makes you wait for answers in a craving sort of way, a longing to know what's going on, and not slogging through a bunch of filler to then get answers. It's great, gorey, geographically diverse fun. Interesting mashups of various cultures re: mythology, history, religion(?). Another on my list to watch out for the return of.
Midnight Burger: the quick pitch is - a time traveling diner that always services people in need, no matter what time, space, or dimension they may reside in. Excellent cast of characters, great development, wonderful implementation of a new character(s), and in general a very comfortable vibe to return to (speaking of, once I run out of recommendations I may relisten to this one). Highly recommend if you like sitcoms with time travel splashed with a bit of horror.
Edit: just finished up another one, so time to add it to the list!!
Monstrous Agonies: A radio show advice segment, about, by, and for the Creature Community. If you like WTNV, but find it a bit intense sometimes, or a bit too plot heavy/etc, you'll absolutely love this. Instead of the whole show, you just get the advice segment, but oh ho ho, is it so much more than that. If you're queer, BIMPOC, from a blended/mixed/broken/anything but 'typical' home... I think you'll like it. Very much what I would call 'easy listening', meaning you can just ease into an episode without having to remember a huge cast of characters, a plots b plots C plots meta plots... And it just feels *real*, in that strange and beautiful way WTNV does, but instead of a fictional town, the setting is the real world, with real problems, and real solutions. Sometimes you really do just need to howl or cry or chew on some slippers and that's OK. Highly recommend for ADHD havers or anyone with a short attention span who loves a soothing voice.
Edit: Another absolute banger to add to the list
Wooden Overcoats - how do I even properly describe the experience of this podcast. Let's start with the basics: It's the story of twins who run a funeral parlor on a small island, in a small village. Their family has been running said parlor for hundreds of years, as the only funeral directors on the island. Until one day... They aren't. A man arrives and sets up his own funeral parlor directly across the square, and boy, do things change for those twins. If you've listened to (and loved) Victoriocity, or The Amelia Project, I guarantee you'll enjoy this one. Strange, silly, and interesting things are always happening, except this one doesn't have quite as much drama (well...... Perhaps a different kind of drama. I'd call this an interpersonal dramedy, with emphasis on the comedy). An incredible listen, through and through. I thoroughly enjoyed every single episode, and the ending was quite safisfying :)
Another EXCELLENT addition to this ever increasing list of content!!! I'm not even finished with this one, I just love it so much that I can't help but add it to the list:
Mission Rejected - you know in those spy movies, where the spy gets a secret message from HQ and they say 'your mission, if you choose to accept it...' ok great. Now imagine if 007 said 'no'. This is the story about the backups, the team that takes the missions rejected by the Top Spy Guy. It's got diverse voice acting (in many senses of the word - you can tell the voices apart, it's not exclusively straight cis white dudes, etc etc), wonderful worldbuilding, great pacing, an excellent plot, I really could go on and on. I highly recommend this specific podcast to anyone who wants something light to get deeply invested in, that has a lot of comedy but also develops the characters outside of just their bits. 100/10 no notes
Edit: not sure which podcast/podcast enthusiast rb'ed this yesterday but I'm so glad more folks get to see this list!!! It makes me so happy that lots of folks enjoy this list, a d share their fave ones, and!!!! Aaaggghhhhhhhhh!!! I love podcasts and podcast enthusiasts!!!!!
Also I have another one for yall :3 if you're looking for another improv comedy to add to your list!!!
Hey Riddle Riddle - exactly what you think it is, but also so much more. Three friends/coworkers who also happen to be sensational improv comedians solve riddles and puzzles together, while also introducing bits and skits and reoccurring segments, so it never feels like 'just a Riddle podcast' (whatever that means). I have laughed every single episode, which is a big deal for me (some comedy podcasts only make me laugh every few episodes, and I require at LEAST one laugh per episode). I can genuinely say this is one of the funniest podcasts I've ever listened to, and the absolute best improv I've ever heard. I'm all for committing to the bit, and this one absolutely delivers on both the commitment part and the bit part haha. Seriously can't recommend this one enough if you maybe listen to a lot of drama/horror and need something easy to listen to (easy meaning there's not a plot you have to be intensely listening for, you can just enjoy it casually). 1000/10, please listen and also tell me YOUR favorite riddles :)
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hoseokshobagi · 3 months
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† Reborn in Sin ⸸ | Sneak peak | PJM
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† Reborn in Sin ⸸ sneak peak
✞PAIRING: demon!jimin x fem!reader
✞ 【SUMMARY】: for years jimin was your constant and loyal companion in the church, a shining example of humility and compassion. but when he was tragically taken from the world before he could experience life, his heart was filled with anger and resentment. and so, in a moment of weakness, he struck a deal with the devil, trading his soul for a second chance at life. but when he returned, he was no longer your kind and devoted boy you once knew.
✞ 『GENRE』: dark ✟ supernatural ✟ fantasy ✟ angst ✟ smut
✞ RATING: 18+ / minors do not interact
✞ WORD COUNT: loading...
✞ [WARNINGS/TAGS] : dead dove, dark, death, manipulation, corruption (kink?), church & religion, blasphemy & desecration, [oral(m) - not with reader, headpusher jimin, face fucking, spit play], dirty talk, humiliation, degradation, dubcon, public fingering, exhibitionism, sexual "nightmares" & hallucinations, mind games, jimin is the worst & the BIGGEST warning!!!!, oral(f), cunt drunk jimin, unprotected sex, rough sex, orgasm denial, edging, overstimulation, unrealistic amount of cum lmao, cum play, betrayal, mind break
✞ NOTE: hi beautiful people!!! this story was written for the @btsfests writing fest. actually this is the first time i publish my writing and omg ahcbdjs i'm so nervous while writing this note. i always wrote for myself and my closest friends but thanks to bts fests and their never ending encouraging words i decided to show off my writing. this little part is the reason why i started writing this whole story and i hope you'll like it just as much as i enjoyed writing every word. :] this demon jimin is the most cunty & selfish character i've written so far so yall better prepare yourselves ajfnsjxnsjs
english is not my native language, but despite that i'll write and communicate in english. please if you see an error in my writing or grammar lmk!! <3
my dearest beta read: @liveyun 🐢♡
COMING SOON
❗this is the darkest fic i've ever written so please read all the warnings before reading❗
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The delicate chimes of the church bell echoed softly through the cavernous rafters, casting an unsettling shadow over Jimin’s mind. Like ghostly whispers emanating from the very walls and pillars of the church, the sounds seemed to taunt him. Whispering to him that he no longer belonged in this sacred space.  
He couldn’t believe how he used to devour Father Seokjin’s every word, eagerly drinking up his sermons like it was the finest wine he ever tasted. In this very church, where he had spent countless hours sitting in the pews, Jimin felt like a stranger in the world he once called home.   
He looked to his left and gazed upon the sweet, delicate flower — the very reason why he was there. Innocence shining in your eyes, your eyelashes fluttered like the softest butterfly wings. Sitting next to him with hands clasped tightly together in your lap, you looked as pure as new snow, listening to the mass.  
Oh, how much he forced himself to resist the urge to reach out and ruin you right then and there. To feel the delicate petals of your innocence as they crumpled beneath his fingers. But he was going to do so slowly, savoring every moment of your fall from grace.   
So, he grit his teeth and forced himself to endure the priest’s words and the choir’s music, at least, for a while.   
Despite his best efforts, this place was as dull and lifeless as the stones that made up its walls. He spent half of his life trapped within these confines, he knew every creak of the floorboards, every flicker of light, every word and phrase of the Bible that was engraved in his mind, the product of countless wasted years.  
Jimin raised a hand to his face, tracing each perfect curve of his newly manicured nails, scrutinizing them from every angle. He raised an eyebrow in anticipation, marveling at Hoseok’s handiwork.  
He couldn’t wait to make another deal with the bastard later.  
You noticed his attention was drifting and Jimin’s reverie was broken by a gentle tap on his shoulder, causing his thoughts to come crashing down around him like a house of cards. He turned to see your confused eyes peering up at him, your delicate lips murmuring a soft “pray”.   
He couldn’t help but mentally roll his eyes. Oh, you were so annoying. He was going to make you pay for all the stress and frustration that he had to go through and endure because of you.   
Jimin lowered his head and with a deep breath, closed his eyes, pretending as if he was lost in prayer, his mind far from it. Wandering anywhere but there.  
As you finally turned back to offer your own prayers, he couldn’t resist and raised his eyes, glancing back at you.  
And he was so fucked.   
You were a sight to behold, more divine than the sacred paintings that adorned the walls of this church.  
As your eyes drifted shut, your lashes like feathers of a sleeping bird, delicately brushed the curves of your eyes. The soft radiance of the lights danced upon your face, creating a tender veil of shadows that caressed your skin.   
Your lips moved in silent devotion as you murmured in such sincerity, clutching the Holy Book tightly in your hands. And he swears, he could feel his dick twitch just at the sight.   
You were so breakable, so vulnerable and so fucking beautiful.   
Yeah, he was so fucked. So lost in you.   
Park’s burning desires had been building to a crescendo in the last few days, a boiling point that seemed to threaten to engulf him whole. He felt like his longing for you was an aching fire that was on the verge of exploding. The mere sight of you at the church was a powerful trigger to him, fanning the flames for this fire.   
And he thought it was ridiculous.   
He couldn’t believe how he couldn’t control himself, his body yearning for yours, needing to stain the purity of your grace, to spread his sin all around your soul. To corrupt the sacredness of who you were with the foulness of who he had become.  
He glanced around and took in the sights and sounds of the church, noticing that everyone was enraptured by the mass. Their focus was solely on the priest at the cathedral, their attention directed nowhere else.   
With a subtle smirk playing at the corners of his mouth, he slipped closer to you and your sweet scent filled his nostrils; making him feel intoxicated. He knew exactly what he had to do; a little play won’t hurt anyone.  
Jimin’s touch was like a gentle caress of a summer breeze, soft and tender, caressing your skin like the lightest of kisses. Your eyes flicked open, searching for the source of such unexpected warmth.   
And there he was, with his legs crossed, - his gaze fixed on you with such intensity that always made your cheeks warm for some reason – one arm resting comfortably on his elbow on the church pew, the other continuing to idly play with the soft fabric of your long skirt.   
You never wore anything revealing; preferring modesty over anything else, however this time, you felt utterly exposed as his eyes roamed over your form like that. Jimin always enjoyed this, stripping away your layers one by one, revealing the true you that lay beneath.  
Slowly he drew near, his aura spreading like a thick mist, wrapping around you. The scent of his cologne swirled around as his body pressed against yours, his knee gently nudging yours. His warm breath brushed against your cheeks, like the caress of a dead night.   
"What are you doing?"
"Nothing. Keep praying." You looked at his hand, still playing with your skirt, unsure of what to say. Jimin’s voice was calm and soft, yet, there was something about his dark eyes that made you feel uneasy. Like he was biding his time, planning his next move.   
It clearly made you uncomfortable, but you were too naive to say anything, too afraid to speak your mind, not to mention that you were sure Jimin would never do anything wrong, so you turned back again and closed your eyes to pray.   
But what you didn’t know was that you were already entangled by the snake’s coils; Jimin waited for the moment when you would break. He was so curious, so eager to see just how far you would go, how much you would endure before you finally stepped up and told him to stop.  
Would you wrench his hand away? Would you yell at him? Would you make a scene in the middle of the church? He knew you wouldn’t, knew you were just too gentle and too timid to disrespect your favorite little church.   
And so, he kept pushing, pushing your boundaries and invading your personal space, inch by inch, leaving a trail of gooseflesh in the wake of his touch.  
You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, trying desperately to break free from his touch, but he only tightened his grip, making your heart race with a mixture of fear and uncertainty.  
"Jimin, can you please stop?" Oh, that was it. Your question was hardly above a whisper, as though afraid of you would be heard by those around you. The snake’s grip finally ensnared his delicate, little flower and he had no intention of stopping.  
„Keep it down. You wouldn’t wanna disturb the praying souls now, would you?”   
A devilish smirk played on his lips, eyes like black holes bearing down at you. His voice was like honey dripping from his lips; so soft and alluring. A stark contrast to the real meaning behind his words and actions. He continued to run his hand up your thigh, pushing your long skirt higher and higher until it was bunched around your waist.  
"Jimin, st—" His other hand slithered around from the back of your neck, forcefully covering your mouth, silencing any words that wanted to escape your lips. Whatever you tried to say it came out muffled by his hand, leaving you feeling panicked and completely helpless.   
You grasped at the material like a lifeline, desperate to pull it back down, but Jimin’s arm was like a steel barricade, preventing you from covering yourself. You felt trapped, your body burning with the shame of exposure. 
 "I said keep your mouth shut. We don’t want others to see you like this, do we?"
Your breath caught in your throat, unable to escape as the fear of being discovered and shamed in front of everyone took over. All you could do was fix your gaze on Jimin’s intense, brooding eyes, silently pleading for mercy with your own desperate ones. Ah, so pretty for him.  
As you gazed into the depths of his dark eyes, the windows to his no longer existing a soul, you revealed a darkness that engulfed you, and you knew there was no escape.  
You were at his mercy, and he had none. 
Jimin’s pupils dilated at the sight, your skin was soft and flawless, causing a shiver to run down his spine as he gently touched you. The delicate fabric of your white panties teased him, giving him just a glimpse of what was hidden underneath.   
With a playful twinkle in his eyes, he lazily played with the tiny, little, pink bow adorning the center of your panties. His actions were a clear taunt, a display of the control he had over you and your vulnerabilities.  
It was clear you wanted to push him away, to scold him, yell at him, but he knew the fear of causing a scene in church held you back. You tried to glance around nervously, hoping no one would notice what was happening.   
The world seemed to come to a standstill, the only thing that existed was the fast, thumping beat of your heart as Jimin’s hand slithered closer and closer to the place where it had no business being. You felt trapped, your body frozen, unable to break free as if you were held captive by a coiled serpent;  its grip tightening with each struggle. The sound of your unsteady breaths filled the air, the only thing grounding you in reality, that, and the heat from his touch, because this serpent was crafted from the finest satin. 
„Shh, baby, it’s okay. It’s okay, keep praying so God won’t mind, yeah?”   
His words made you paralyzed, like a spell, breaking you down. Words like those should never have left the lips of the kind and caring Jimin that you thought you knew. Your mind was reeling with shock and pain, struggling to make sense of how someone you had trusted completely could suddenly become a stranger. Jimin’s actions were like a knife to your heart, a stab that pierced through the trust you had placed in him.   
With the grace of a feather dancing on skin, Jimin traced his fingers over your clothed clit, making you tremble beneath his touch. A soft gasp escaped your lips, your eyes widening as you felt the weight of the moment sinking in.  
And he chuckled softly, a low rumble that only you could hear, taking your response as a cue, he increased the pressure. His skilled fingers now applied a firm yet tender touch, coaxing your body to new heights of pleasure, and your body tingled in response, betraying you by a throbbing ache that grew stronger with every touch.  
As the ripples of pleasure swirled within you, you tried to pull back, to resist the sin that was happening in the very place where you sought solace and salvation. The guilt gnawed at your soul, the snake’s venom that seeped into every crevice, tainting the flower’s beauty.   
And yet, Jimin reveled in your pain, basking in the darkness of your suffering as he watched the guilt consume you whole. The venom of your remorse was a feast for his senses; the holy wine, the sweetest elixir to be savored with every devious sip.  
"Look, what do we have in here." He pressed his thumb against the dark spot on your panties, causing you to shiver. For him, the sensations of your wetness seeping through the fabric was like an euphoric rush, the sweet nectar of his delicate flower, intoxicating and irresistible.  
Heat spread across your cheeks, horror and shame washing over you at his words, you shook your head, tried to move, tried to tell him to stop, but you found yourself lost in his eyes, searching for any sign of the person you once knew. But all you saw was darkness, a void that seemed to swallow you whole.  
"Deny it if you want, baby, but aren’t you a nasty girl? You’re fucking soaking."
And it was true. Your body felt like it was betraying you, and you were mortified. He ignited a fire within you that you couldn’t deny. A soft cry slipped from your lips, but you couldn’t bear to face him, knowing that you were powerless in his grasp.  
You were unable to believe what was happening. As someone who had always followed the Catholic faith and held its teachings in high regard, there you were, in this sacred place, allowing something so forbidden to take place.  
But as his fingers slipped under the fabric of your panties, your mind went blank. The back of Jimin’s hand clung to your sticky panties as his fingers found their way down to your folds, the feeling making him shiver. 
„Fuck— you’re so wet, can’t wait to feel you around me.”   
You squeezed your lips together under Jimin’s hand to keep from making any noise, your eyes squeezed shut, tears threatened to spill down your cheeks as his wet fingers continued to rub and spread your folds apart, smearing your sticky arousal all over your cunt.  
„Shh, this won’t make you a sinner baby, it’s okay. You won’t mind just one finger inside, yeah?” His middle finger probed at your entrance, teasing it, making it wetter still, as he slowly pushed in.  
„Y-yeah baby— just one finger?” He teased and removed his finger, making you clench around thin air, and Jimin swears, the feeling made him twitch inside his pants. Teasing you – or himself, it didn’t matter anymore – he plunged back in, tauntingly slow. 
Jimin’s eyes rolled to the back of his skull, his hard dick pressing firmly against his pants, yearning for release. To him this is how true Paradise felt like, the feeling of your silk walls wrapped around his digit.   
He was about to lose it. 
He bottomed his finger out inside you, knuckle deep, until his small 13 tattoo on his wrist met with your lower abdomen. 
But he craved more. Fuck, how much he wanted to slam you against the pew and spread your thighs wide open, stretching your pretty little pussy right out with his dick. And who could blame him with the way your cunt gripped on his one single digit like that, dripping wet and sinfully warm. 
But he couldn’t— not now. And it made him crazy. 
You sank into the pew, your body trembling as he started to move his finger, his other hand still covering your mouth to keep you quiet. Every part of you was on fire, your mind and body in a constant battle between desire and shame. You were supposed to stop him, to push him away, but all you could manage was tremble and it made your eyes water. 
It was a mixture of remorse and the burning desire pounding between your thighs; something you had never experienced before and something you knew you shouldn’t have felt at all in this holy place. And more likely you should’ve never clenched harder around Jimin’s finger when you heard the small shudder in each breath he took. 
"Ahh baby—" The faint, breathy little whimper shattered his voice. "fuck.. you’re so perfect… so f-fucking perfect." 
Your heart pounded in your chest, your breath shallow and ragged, mirroring the rhythm of his finger. With his warm breath tickling your ear, his whispered words were barely audible, but they still managed to send shivers down your spine.  
"Ooh, h-how I wish to see this perfect fucking pussy."   
Jimin couldn’t take his eyes off of you as he watched your face intently, committing every single feature and expression to his memory. The way your brows were furrowed in pleasure, the way you fought to keep your eyes open due to the sensitivity. 
He couldn’t help but admire the way your chest rose and fell with each ragged breath, the way you tried to stifle your moans under his hand, and the way your juices flowed from your aching cunt.  
You were a captivating sight, sinful and alluring, flesh heated and glistening with arousal, and he knew you couldn’t deny it even though you tried. Your trembling body and the slickness on his fingers were evidence of the truth.  
He slowly added a second finger, stretching you open further and moving faster, his fingers stroking your sensitive spot, sending waves of pleasure through you. With every stroke, you felt your body weakening, and your thoughts began to succumb to the corrupting pleasure.  
Despite your protests, your body responded eagerly, arching towards him in a desperate plea for more;  seeking more of the exquisite pleasure he was giving you.  
You never felt so conflicted in your entire life, your mind was a battlefield; torn between your beliefs and the undeniable pleasure that was now coursing through your veins. Every creak of the old wooden pews felt like a judgment, a cruel reminder that you were committing a sin that would send you to the depths of damnation.  
But when Jimin serendipitously grazed your swollen clit with his thumb, your mind went blank. You’d lost it.  
Your hips involuntarily jerked against his hand, unable to contain the overwhelming pleasure. You gritted your teeth, determined to keep your cries of ecstasy at bay, but it was a dead effort as you squirmed and moaned, muffled by his hand covering your mouth.  
"Fuck— Don’t moan like that, you’re getting too loud, keep quiet."  
But you couldn’t. It was as if your head was spinning, unable to focus on anything except the pleasure. The way he slid his fingers in and out of you, his thumb perfectly stimulating your clit, it was too much.  
Despite your efforts, you couldn’t contain the small moans that escaped your lips. The church was now just a blur in the background, the stained glass windows casting kaleidoscopic patterns on the floor.  
"Shit, baby, keep fucking quiet or do you want me to slip those fucking panties off and stuff them in your mouth, hm?" Jimin’s whispered words sent shivers down your spine, making you clasp around his fingers right back in. 
"Y-yeah, you want that baby? My nasty girl, s-so good... so fucking perfect." He moved his fingers faster, his thumb circling deliciously on your clit, building up the pace for your climax, your body crying out for release. And oh, how he reveled in it, savoring every moment, every sensation as his little flower finally opened its petals to him. 
"You’re so close, baby, f-fuck— just let go, let me take you there."  
As Jimin’s fingers brought you closer and closer to the brink, you couldn’t help but give in, feeling all the guilt and shame wash away in the face of the intense pleasure you were feeling.  
„Ooh, fuck— Y-yeah, baby, go on. Come all over my fucking fingers.” 
Just as you were about to reach the peak, a sudden thud broke through the lustful haze. Your tear-filled eyes fluttered open and you glanced up to the top of the church’s gallery, where you saw the organ player, Mr. Min sprawled on the ground at the bottom of the stairs, amidst a sea of fallen notes.  
In that moment, time seemed to stand still as your eyes met his, and you saw the shock and disbelief on his once serene face.  
Your heart plummeted like a falling star, sinking into the depths of your stomach as you realized what you must look like to Mr. Min. Your cheeks burned with the heat of a thousand suns as you met his gaze, his face a canvas of flushed embarrassment, crushing you with shame and guilt. 
For in the eyes of Mr. Min, you were no other, but a sinner caught in the act of sin in the house of the divine. And as the notes of the holy music lay scattered at his feet, you couldn’t help but wonder if they were a reflection of your shattered innocence.  
Mr. Min quickly ascended the stairs to the organ, his emotions were in disarray, a tumultuous blend of arousal and embarrassment. With each step, he tried to push away the image of what he had just seen, but it lingered like a haunting melody in his mind.  
His cheeks burned with shame, but he couldn’t help stealing a glance at you before he reached the top of the stairs, his feline eyes burning you whole.  
Exposed and vulnerable, you were unable to look at the organ player in the eyes anymore. You closed your eyes tight in an attempt to block out the intensity of his gaze. But even with your eyes shut, you could feel his feline eyes looking down at you.  
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head at the image, Jimin’s skillful fingers never faltered to move inside you, your body feeling like it was exploding. A soft whimper escaped your lips, which got silenced by his firm grasp.  
With each second you felt yourself surrendering to the overwhelming ecstasy.  
As you teetered on the edge, ready to fall into the abyss of pleasure, you were suddenly jolted back to reality, finding yourself next to Jimin who was kneeling humbly on the wooden pew of the church, praying.   
With eyes wide open, heated cheeks and heavy breathing you gazed at your own clasped hands on the pew.  
Was this all in your head? How could you have let your mind wander to sinful desires in the sacred walls of the church?   
Jimin’s innocent devotion to his God only amplified your own guilt, making you feel like a fallen angel in the presence of his pure soul.  
Jimin couldn’t help but smirk, he bit the inside of his cheek, but it didn’t help hiding it. He moved his clasped hands toward his mouth to hide the devilish smirk that appeared on his lips. 
For he knew the power he held over you, the power to seduce and corrupt your very being. And with each passing day he was one step closer to claiming your body and soul for his own. 
And as you sat there, lost in a whirlwind of emotions, Jimin continued to pray, his facade of innocence masking the devilish intentions that lurked within. 
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yamujiburo · 7 months
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I'm so thankful for you sharing the importance of protecting minors from sexual content. My parents and I didn't have much knowledge back then and I was exposed to this kind of stuff too early. I developed bad habits. I somehow deceived my family into trusting me way too much and, when I saw I had lost control and I asked for help, I saw my family was also hurt and they spent a lot on therapy and my anxiety medication. I have forgiven them for not knowing back them. But I still haven't forgiven myself for getting them through all that stuff. It's important to understand how much we need to protect minors from sexual content. Family members and artists, please pay attention to the content young audience is exposed to.
Of course! I can relate a lot to this. My parents were really good at monitoring what I was doing online for a while but they started trusting me more and I unfortunately started seeing a lot of stuff I shouldn't have but would keep it secret. Gonna talk about my experience a lil bit under the cut just bc I've been reflecting on it a lot recently (tw for grooming)
I gained a following of around 25K on deviantart by the time I was around 15/16. It was in the worst fandom too (mlp). I'd have a lot of much older men talking to me, drawing/writing nsfw of my characters who were underaged (they'd draw nsfw of myself and my sonas as well). It was so normalized for me and I didn't see anything wrong with it at the time.
I'd shipped Spike and Rarity at the time (very much do not anymore) and adult men would use that ship as a basis for trying to talk to me or get in a relationship. "We're just like Sparity! You're young but you're very mature for your age, so it's fine." I remember one guy trying REALLY hard to try and get me to move in with him. I was pretty creeped out then, but like holy shit that's SUPER creepy and I'm fortunate that he didn't keep trying after I gave him a hard "no".
It bled into my real life a bit when I met a 22 y/o man who asked me out when I was just 16 just turning 17. Luckily the relationship was NOT long lasting (I think he realized that I'm a very boring person LMAO) but I think about how I thought that that was a perfectly normal. I'd date go on to date people who were probably too old for me.
Also around when I was 16/17, people started shipping me with another artist in the fandom who was several years older than I was (side note: nothing wrong with an age gap! but it's very not okay when there's "waiting" for someone to be of legal age involved). I did end up dating said artist after I turned 18 and it was fine, I wasn't hurt or anything but I did find weird that we were shipped when I was still a teenager looking back (there was also nsfw drawn of us together before/when we were dating)
I just had such a warped sense of reality for a long because of this shit. I'm glad there's more conversations about this stuff and it's more known that adults should have little to no personal interaction with kids on the internet and vice versa. There's way too many stories of kids getting taken advantage of in fandom spaces. I think I got off fairly lucky all things considered. But bottom line YES kids need to be protected online and their exposure to sexual content/adult spaces should be limited or monitored. It's also really tough though because not all kids have adults in their real life that they can trust or go to to ask questions about sex so they seek solace in adults online and it's just a constant cycle.
I'm honestly unsure of what to do about that and I don't have all the answers but I ultimately just don't want kids online to end up in similar positions I was in when I was younger. I just do my best
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alrightieaphroditie · 10 months
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harder | j.m  series masterlist!
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pairing *:·゚joel miller x female!reader wc *:·゚5.7k warnings *:·゚18+! minors please do not interact!! v angsty at first, mentions of death and overall sad topics... then we go into a lil bit of kissing, some dirty talk if you squint, teasing, pet names (baby, sugar), titty play, some praise, probably poorly written smut lmao an *:·゚it's been a hot second since i tried writing smut and damn am i insecure about it lmaoo this took longer than anticpated too because i sadly lost half of it almost immediately after writing it... so yeah. feedback is hella appreciated on this, and it isn't quite proofread so if you catch something please let me know!! i enjoyed writing this (like a lot) so i really hope you all enjoy reading this! <3 
synopsis *:·゚ever since the dinner at your place, joel and ellie have fit themselves into your life seamlessly. when joel gets back from a hunting trip, he comes over and shows you some new tricks. (18+!)
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over the course of a couple months, joel and ellie had fit themselves into your life like puzzle pieces. 
the pair would come over to your house once a week every week after that first dinner together, and sometimes you would cook, sometimes you'd grab some food to go from the tipsy bison. they would help you set the table, ellie nagging joel most nights about how slow he was moving to put the silverware around the table. you would all eat, then ellie would sneak into the living room while you and joel cleaned together. and then the three of you would sit around your coffee table, playing board games or cards. or you'd go to see the movie playing in town, or you'd go for a walk around the neighborhood. 
these nights with them quickly became your favorite moments of the week. you had formed a close bond with ellie, and the more time you spent with joel, the harder you fell for him. most nights ellie would fall asleep in the guest room you had set up for her, and you and joel would spend hours talking together out on the porch like you did that first night. 
sometimes you'd talk about nothing major. he'd comment on how the greenhouses were doing, which was where you helped the community out the most, and it would get you talking about all the vegetables and flowers you were trying to grow. or you'd ask how his patrol shift went, and he'd complain to you about his partner. it was small talk, but with someone like joel, it meant a lot to you that he was willing to simply sit on your wooden bench beside you and listen. 
sometimes, after a long week, you'd make joel a glass of whiskey (which you had started to keep around simply for the man. how he didn't know how much you crushed on him was beyond you. maybe it was his age.) and you'd talk about the harder things. your time spent in the bunker your family built. how your best friend was murdered by a group of hunters after they had kept you captive for weeks. how they used you. how you managed to kill them all while they slept because they got lazy and assumed you were too weak. 
joel had had a hard time listening to it, but he insisted that he wanted to hear about your past. the guilt he felt was indescribable. he wasn't the one to keep you captive, to use you, but with his past as a hunter he couldn't help but feel like he played a role in your pain. he had spent a lot of time repressing his emotions regarding that aspect of his life, but you encouraged him to talk about it. to feel his emotions. you told him over and over again that you didn't blame him, weren't scared of him. didn't judge him. 
it was hard for him to hear, to believe, but your consistency helped him more than he would ever admit. he was more welcome in jackson now than he was when he first arrived, mostly thanks to you, but he still felt like an outsider. like people were just waiting for a pin to drop and for him to reduce back into the monster of a man they claimed him to be. he was tired of trying to prove to everyone that he was simply just a man who survived the only way he knew how to. but with you? he didn't feel the need to apologize for who he was. he could settle with you, and that was something he hadn't felt in a long time. 
on the simpler nights, joel would talk about his life before the outbreak, how he and tommy worked in contracting and how he missed doing things with his hands. he'd talk about always being busy, always doing something, when the world turned. about how he was skeptical of the community when he and ellie first stumbled upon it because for once, for the first time since the outbreak, he wasn't constantly having to look over his shoulder for something bad. 
on the harder nights, the ones where joel felt like he needed more than one glass of liquor, he confided in you about sarah. about tess. about how his relationship with tommy had changed and he didn't know what he needed to do to fix it anymore. about his insecurities with ellie, how he didn't trust his mind anymore to make the right decisions when it came to her because he was too attached. 
he told you all of the things he swore he would never talk about again, and you simply sat there, listening, sharing his burden. the way your hand would rest gently on his arm while he talked, squeezing it every once in a while, to encourage him to go on, it provided him with a strength he didn't know he needed. 
joel didn't know this, but that night when he first told you about sarah and the events that happened on his birthday, after he and ellie had left, you spent the rest of your night crying in your bed. crying for joel, for the loss he had experienced. for how the world had turned and how he had to manage the loss of his own world on top of it. for how he was never properly able to grieve her death. 
you were beginning to see a side of joel you don't think anyone has seen in a long time. you were also starting to understand why joel miller was the man he is today. after learning about his past, his experiences, and his trauma, you recognized and could empathize why he felt the need to guard his heart the way he has been. it was a testament to his strength, how he could keep going while carrying all of that inside of him, and you admired the hell out him. 
and somehow, you had worked your way into his heart, through his guards. and joel may not have known it yet, but you were there to stay, and you would be for as long as he let you. 
you were constantly thinking about the man, your days spent replaying your conversations in your mind and getting giddy just remembering them. you honestly were a bit concerned, considering you've never felt this way about anyone before. you wanted to ask maria about it, but then she'd pester you into telling her who you were crushing over, and you didn't think it would go over too well considering joel was twice your age and, well, him. 
so, you kept it to yourself, letting your mind fantasize about what it would be like to actually be with joel, physically, romantically, all of it. 
you hadn't seen joel in a couple of days, as he was one of the men selected to go hunt. he wouldn't be back for a few more days, either, and you hated to admit it but you missed him. and you wondered if he missed you too. if he ever thought about you while he was away. he was so hard to read, even now, and sometimes you thought about just grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him while you unloaded all of your feelings onto him. 
but if there was one thing you knew about joel miller, it was that he would absolutely hate that. so... you kept it to yourself. 
you had just gotten home after spending all day in the greenhouse with ellie. maria had you showing her the vegetation that the community was working on, showing her the ins and outs of gardening and how to properly pick the fruit that was growing. she loved it, of course, and on her breaks, she spent most of the time sketching the different fruits and flowers in the little sketchbook joel had found for her. 
it was a good day, but a busy one, and you were exhausted. the sun was already starting to set, and you wanted to cuddle up on your couch with one of the romance novels your friend had brought you with a cup of tea. you were still dressed in your work outfit - a pair of olive-green linen pants and simple black cotton t-shirt - and you were already planning on stepping into your pajamas early when a knock on your door startled you. 
a glance through the little peephole on your door had your heart racing. joel was standing on your porch, one of his arms behind his back as he glanced around. you could see the muscles in his arm bulge against the faded red t-shirt he was wearing, and that sight alone could've fueled your fantasies for a month straight. 
a grin was plastered on your face as you unlocked the front door, and his dark eyes found yours easily through the screen door. "joel miller, as i live and breathe. what are you doin' here?" you adopted an exaggerated southern accent, something you and ellie started doing to poke fun of joel for his texan roots. he kept telling you guys it wasn't funny, but you could always see a small smile on his lips every time you did it.
even now as he rolled his eyes at you, you could see the edges of his mouth quirk up in a smirk, and fuck but you loved it. "you think you're so damn funny with that, don't you?" he asked, his gaze trailing down your body so quickly you almost missed it. but you didn't, and now your face was burning bright red. 
"ellie would agree with me and you know it, mister." you argued, pushing the screen door open for joel to come in. he didn't move, though, keeping his arm behind his back with a mischievous gleam in his eyes. you crossed your arms over your chest. "but for real, i thought you were gonna be out a few more days with everyone else?" it was rare that the hunting party would come back early, but not uncommon either. 
"didn't have much luck in the area we were in, so we figured we'd come back and regroup before leaving again. i found somethin' though," he trailed off, a full smile encompassing his mouth now. something you had learned about joel in your months of studying him was that gift giving was a huge thing for him. he mainly brought stuff back for ellie, but you've noticed lately that he had been finding little things here and there for you too. you wondered what that meant.
you could just barely make out the edges of something behind his legs, but you couldn't quit tell what it was. your arms slipped from your chest, your hands moving out and making a grabby motion. "you want me to close my eyes?" you teased, making a point of squinting your eyes so that you could see just a sliver of joel between them. he shook his head at you, grumbling something about how weird you were becoming, and he moved his arm from back behind his body. 
"joel!" you gasped; mouth dropped in awe as he presented a perfectly intact guitar. "this is amazing! you do know what this means now, right?" his eyebrow rose as he took in the sight of you gently holding the instrument. he had been pretty proud of the find, taking care to clean off the vines and dirt that had dusted itself around the guitar. considering you had been begging him for lessons for weeks since ellie mentioned he could play the guitar; he knew what was coming. 
he wanted to tease you about it, regardless. 
"if i hear the words 'guitar lessons' come out of your mouth, 'm leavin'." he threatened, crossing his arms across his chest. his worn t-shirt strained against his muscles and tightened around his chest, and it took everything in you not to stare. his tone was mean, as mean as he could get with you, but then he did something you weren't expecting - he winked at you. 
you squealed internally. 
“that’s not fair and you know it, miller. we literally have a guitar now! what else are we gonna do with it?” you complained playfully, your voice light. you started backing up into the house, joel’s arm reaching out to catch the screen door before it slammed shut in his face. he followed you in, making sure to close both doors and kicking his work boots off next to the small rug you had inside. 
you were still marveling over the instrument, turning it over in your hands while taking it in. from what you remembered, this was a pretty standard guitar. the wood was a warm brown, and it had all six silvery strings connected still. you sat down on the carpet in front of your couch, balancing the guitar on your thighs. you were aware of joel as he entered the living room behind you, settling into one of the chairs you had on the other side of the room.
he was quiet as he watched you get comfortable with the guitar, his brown eyes sweeping over your figure. your head was bent to the side, your hair falling in slight waves across your face as you studied where to put your fingers on the neck. he could see you biting your bottom lip as you concentrated, and he had to stealthy adjust himself in the chair as he watched. god, he thought. you looked so beautiful. 
his thoughts were interrupted by the loudest, most out of tune noise coming from you and the guitar. he had to fight off the urge to cover his ears, but then he wouldn’t have heard the sound of your laughter that followed quickly after, and that was something he never wanted to miss. his eyes were already on yours when you lifted your head to look at him, a sheepish smile on your face. “clearly i don’t know what i’m doing. your turn?” 
he hadn’t played the guitar in years, but he would be lying if he said his fingers weren’t itching to at least hold it again. he rubbed his palms against his jean clad thighs before standing up and taking the guitar from your outstretched hands. for some reason, he was nervous to play in front of you. he wanted it to be good, to be perfect, but with years of not practicing and with no idea how maintained this guitar was, he really couldn’t do much besides try. 
joel tested the guitar in his grip, absentmindedly strumming his fingers quietly while he fiddled with the pegs to tune it. and you sat there on your carpet, stars in your eyes as you watched his shoulders relax ever so slightly. you saw his foot tapping against the floor as he strummed, and it wasn’t a song you recognized but it immediately became your new favorite. 
he played for a lot longer than you anticipated, his eyes closing softly as his fingers worked the neck of the guitar. you wished in this moment that you had a camera, some way to capture the moment. you’ve never seen joel so relaxed, so in his element. his foot, tapping away against your floor. his hands, holding the guitar with a level of gentleness you weren’t expecting. his head, slowly bobbing along to the chords he played. the sunset was filtering through your window, casting him in an orangish glow. 
and your heart ached, thinking about the man before you who once dreamed of making a career out this. he was talented enough, that was for damn sure. you could easily imagine him somewhere up on a stage, holding the same guitar and preforming the same exact way. you wondered if he’d ever sing in front of you, but you didn’t want to push your luck. this alone was enough for you. 
the music eventually drifted away softly, joel’s fingers coming to rest as he strummed it one last time. he cleared out his throat when he finished, looking a little shy, but you weren’t having it. “joel, that was amazing.” you gushed, fighting the urge to clap for him. 
“s’nothin’ special,” he muttered, but you swore the tips of his cheeks turned a shade of light pink from the compliment. 
“that’s bullshit and you know it,” your tone was argumentative back, not wanting him to diminish his talents. you sat forward on your knees, clasping your hands together. “will you please teach me something, joel? anything? one singular basic chord?” you begged, giving him your biggest eyes and playful pout. 
“you’re almost worse than ellie is when she wants something.” he teased, rolling his head back on his neck before standing up to come sit behind you on the couch. his legs spread out, and from the corner of your eye you could see his thighs strain against his jeans. oh lord. 
“i’m taking that as a compliment. that girl is so headstrong and i love it,” you shuffled back so that your back was pressed against the couch, crossing your legs over the other again so that you could rest the guitar against your lap. you gave an experimental strum, and since joel worked on tuning it, the noise that came out was much more pleasant than your attempt earlier. 
“course you would,” the man behind you muttered, and you shot him a grin over your shoulder before adjusting your hands on the instrument. he leaned forward slightly, keeping an eye on your hands and not the way your shirt dipped down the front of your chest slightly. your skin was more exposed, and he could see a constellation of freckles littering your skin. fuck, but he wanted to kiss every single one of them. 
with a sigh, joel began telling you where to place your fingers along the neck for specific chords. he was patient, watching carefully as you figured them out with his help. every time you correctly struck the right chord, it made him grin. he liked seeing you so excited over this mundane activity. the way you were always so enthusiastic, so bright, it just drew him in like a moth to the light. he couldn’t help it. 
you had shifted away from the couch slightly, your back hunched over the instrument as you did you best to play it. you had picked up the simple chords pretty easily, but you were struggling with getting your finger placement correct on the last one joel gave you. joel kept telling you how easy this one was, too, which had started to frustrate you. the man’s hands were easily twice the size of your own, of course he would think it was easy. and you said as much to joel, too, who only chuckled in response. 
“know you can do it, sugar.” he encouraged quietly, scooting over on the couch so that his legs almost bracketed your body. he leaned forward, pulling your upper body back a bit from its slouch as he moved to help you. “keep your arm like this, and then stretch this finger as much as you can. you can move your wrist a little, too.” his rough hands were soon on top of your own, his applying a little more pressure so that he could guide your finger to the correct position. 
finally, you were able to hit the chord right, and you cheered for yourself as you strummed it a couple more times. joel’s hand had slide up your arm gently, resting on the top of your left shoulder while you played. he was still crouched over slightly, but when you turned your head to look at him, you were shocked with how close his face was to yours. 
now that you were facing him though, you could revel in the way his breath was hitting the spot on your neck just right, how it sent goosebumps down your arms and a shiver to your spine. if you tilted your head slightly, you’d bump his nose with your own. your eyes jumped to his, your hand gripping the neck of the guitar so tightly you worried that you were going to snap it. “joel,” you whispered, soft breaths parting from your lips as it opened slightly. 
his dark eyes met yours, and that was it.
you weren’t too sure who moved first. if it was you, dropping the guitar from your lap while you twisted up onto your knees in front of him. if it was him, the hand on your shoulder moving to rest at the base of your neck, squeezing it slightly as he guided you up to his mouth. joel’s thumb caressed your skin softly, and you felt yourself go weak in the knees.  
his mouth slanted across yours, and the feeling of his stubble scratching against your face made you whimper into his mouth softly. his hand tightened around your neck, using the leverage to pull you up from your knees, while his other hand guided you by your hip to straddle one of his legs on the couch. your hands went from his shoulders to his hair to cupping the sides of his face. you could feel him grinning against your lips.
you’ve been kissed before but kissing joel was an entirely new experience. you have never done something that felt so right, so good. you never wanted this to stop. 
your legs adjusted your weight on his thigh, and you felt joel’s grip on your waist tighten as he pressed you down harder. you could feel the rough denim through your thin linen pants, and when joel moved his hand forward, your hip followed in his grip as he rocked you against his thigh. this was a new experience, however. the feeling of his solid thigh pressed against your core, and you suddenly felt much, much hotter. 
“joel,” you whispered again, though it came out in more of a whimper against his lips. his hand rocked you against him again, and yours slid to hold his shoulders and you tested the movement yourself, dragging your hips up his thigh and then back down. another whimper emitted from your lips, and you had half a mind to be embarrassed about the noise, but you were too caught up in the feeling. 
“i know, baby.” his voice was rough against your mouth, and he lowered his lips against yours again, this time angling his head to the side to deepen the kiss. joel tugged on your bottom lip with his teeth, making you gasp softly at the hint of pain before his tongue covered the spot. he took the opportunity of your open mouth to move his tongue in against yours, and you basically crumpled in his lap at how demanding he was as he kissed you. 
your hips had started to steadily move against his thigh on your own, but his big, rough hand was still resting on your hip, his fingers digging little half-moon bruises into your skin as he helped you press a little harder. joel gave your throat one last little squeeze before he moved to the hem of your t-shirt, his fingers slipping underneath ever so slightly. you could feel the calluses on his hands as he trailed them across your stomach lightly, and your breath caught in your throat as he brushed his thumb over the material of your bra, right where your nipple would be. 
you were so overwhelmed by everything joel - his taste, his touch, his smell. you didn’t want to, but you felt yourself struggling to catch a breath, so you pulled away from his mouth slightly, brushing his nose with yours gently. he could feel the little pants coming from your mouth as you exhaled, could hear the smallest of whimpers riding along those exhales as well. everything about you in this moment was working for him, so well that he was trying to think of something ridiculous to stop himself from coming in his damn jeans like a teenager. 
“god, sugar,” he said lowly, trailing his nose across your jaw and down your neck before settling his lips on the base of your throat. the feeling made you giggle softly, but it quickly turned into a louder moan as he started to suck on your skin. “you’re ridin’ my thigh so well, huh?” the compliment had you blushing even more than before. 
you never would’ve imagined that joel, quiet, stoic, joel, would be talking to you like one of the heroes in your romance novels. it was better than anything you could have ever thought of. 
“it feels so good, joel,” you whined, sliding your hand from his shoulder to cup the back of his head. you let your fingers dig into his skin, pulling on the small strands of his hair lightly as you bucked your hips against him. he let out a low groan against your neck, his fingers underneath your shirt pinching the spot his thumb just brushed against. 
he couldn’t help but let out a chuckle. “fuck, i knew you’d be too good to resist. you look so pretty, takin’ what you want from me.” he nipped at your neck, grinning against your skin as you cried out. letting go of your hip, he moved his hand under your shirt with the other one, raising it just enough so that he could see the black bra you were wearing. “can i move this down?” he asked so politely, pressing a small kiss against the skin he just bit.
considering the position you were in, the pleasure this man was making you feel by simply kissing you, you were inclined to let him do whatever he so pleased with you. all you could do was nod your head, give him a small “mhm,” as your eyes started to flutter shut from the tingling sensation happening low in your stomach. 
you heard joel give you a quiet “thank you, baby,” before his hands tugged down the front of your bra. he didn’t bother pulling your shirt off, he didn’t bother taking the bra off entirely. instead, he managed to pull them low enough to have your tits spill over the top, and he bit back a groan before he lowered his mouth to take one of your nipples into his mouth. 
the feeling of his warm mouth against your sensitive skin had you arching your back, pressing your front closer against joel. he slid one of his hands to your lower back, his skin rough against yours, as he encouraged you to move your hips against him. your hand in his hair gripped tightly, practically holding joel against your chest as he nipped and sucked. 
your inner thighs were starting to shake from the movements, and his name was leaving your mouth like a prayer. it only encouraged him more, and he started to softly bounce his leg while you moved against it, giving you even more friction. you felt the heat from your stomach pool to your center, and you weren’t even able to form a coherent thought anymore. you couldn’t help your eyes from squeezing shut, couldn’t help your mouth from falling open, couldn’t help the borderline pornographic moans that emitted from your lips. 
“that’s it, sugar. gonna make yourself cum against my thigh, huh?” joel asked, pulling away from your chest as he watched you with hooded eyes. you were completely lost in the pleasure, could feel yourself soak through your panties with how wet you were becoming. you had never cum like this before, but god this would definitely not be the last time. that was a sentiment that you both had shared. 
“fuck, joel,” you squeaked out, increasing your hips movements against his thigh. his hand on your back gave you support, and he pinched your nipples roughly once more before he gripped your throat and brought your mouth back against his. this kiss was harder, messier, and more urgent than the kiss before. your teeth bumped against his, you felt your lips getting wet with spit, and fuck but you loved it. joel was usually so in control, so calm, and seeing him become so rushed, so frantic, it nearly pushed you to your orgasm alone. 
the thing that did it for you, though, was joel pulling away slightly, your noses brushing together as he offered you quiet words of encouragement. “you’re doing such a good job, just like that, baby. look at you, makin’ a mess on my thigh.” his breath invaded your space, making you gasp as you fought to get air as his hand tightened around your neck. he kissed you once more, just a gentle press of his lips against yours, and you lost it. 
your body curled in on itself as you came, white hot heat flooding your senses as you fell into joel’s chest with a loud cry. you were gripping him tightly, anchoring yourself to him as your body trembled. he held you tightly, brushing your hair back from your sweaty forehead and rubbing his hand up and down your back. he was grinning the entire time, his ego raising indefinitely at the fact that he had been able to make you feel this good. 
your face was pressed in the crook of his neck, and you were surprised to find genuine tears lingering in your eyes. that knowledge had you giggling, and you must have been delirious because you couldn’t stop it from happening. joel tilted his head back. “what the hell are you laughin’ at right now?” he asked, incredulously. he had never had a girl laugh after being with him. 
you could hear the slight panic in his voice, which made you laugh even more, but you sat back. “you made me cry,” you admitted to him, running your fingers underneath your eyes to wipe away the stray tears. joel let out a snort, which had you laughing once again. his thumbs moved to replace your fingers, gently moving across your skin until the wet was cleared up. he leaned up, placing a kiss gently on your forehead. “you okay?” he asked, softly caressing your skin with his hands. 
you bit down on your bottom lip, feeling more than okay, and you gave him a quick nod before taking his mouth with yours. the kiss was soft, but you were well intended to give joel the same amount of affection. your hand had just trailed down his chest, stopping at the waistband of his jeans, when you heard your front door open. 
“hello?” ellie’s voice rang out from the entryway, forcing you and joel apart. you had never moved so quickly, swinging your leg off of his thigh and fixing your top to cover your chest once again. you were still kneeling on the couch near joel when ellie stomped her way into the living room, giving the two of you a weird look. “why are you guys sitting so close to each other?” 
“she had somethin’ in her eye,” joel’s response was so quick, it almost made you snort. “what the hell are you doin’ here, kid? and didn’t i teach you how to knock first?” his irritation was palpable, which you found funny. poor guy was probably seconds away from coming in his pants. 
“geez, sorry. i saw that some of the other guys were back early, and you weren’t home so i figured you’d be here.” she explained, holding her hands up in surrender. joel pinched the bridge of his nose with one hand, trying to get his breathing under control. he had no right to be mad at ellie, and it wasn’t that he was actually mad… he was just trying not to embarrass himself in front of you. 
“why’d you figure that, els?” you asked, loving the fact that ellie knew joel well enough that he would come over here if he wasn’t at home first. even if you guys had just made out on your couch, you still liked the validation that joel maybe, possibly liked you back. 
“where else would he be? he literally never leaves the house unless it’s to come over here, and he hasn’t shut up about you since you first met.” she threw herself down in one of the chairs across the room from you, completely oblivious to the glare joel was shooting her way. 
“oh really?” your voice was teasing as you turned your head to joel, who easily fixated his glare on you. you wiggled on your knees slightly next to him, which caused his eyes to darken. 
“don’t you ‘oh, really?’ me like that. is this how it’s gonna be? the two of you gangin’ up on me from now on? because i don’t think i like it very much.” he slouched back against the couch, folding his arms across his chest. 
“yes, you do.” you and ellie chirped back at the same time, giving each other a grin as joel shook his head. he muttered something under his breath before standing up, adjusting his jeans as he did. ellie hopped up from her chair, too, rubbing her hands on her stomach. “can we get something from the tipsy bison? i’m starving.” 
“sure, kid.” joel responded, ruffling her hair as she passed by him. she didn’t even bother to wave goodbye before she moved out the front door, leaving joel and you alone again. he glanced at the door until it was shut before turning back your way, placing his hand under your chin to lift your gaze up to him.
“we’ll talk about this later, yeah?” he asked, his brown eyes soft as they focused on your face. you simply nodded, finding yourself shifting up on your knees so that you could kiss him one more time. joel sighed as you did, nipping at your bottom lip before pulling away. he bid you a goodnight before he followed ellie out of your house. 
sinking back into the couch cushions, you couldn’t help but let yourself freak out for a moment. never in your wildest dreams did you anticipate your evening taking a turn like this, and you were looking forward to seeing joel again so that you could talk. hopefully, talking isn’t the only thing we do, you thought, the grin on your face wider than ever. 
after kissing joel miller, it was decided. you were falling harder and harder for that man, and you didn’t mind it a single bit. 
tag list *:·゚@yyiikes @farintonorth @scarletsloveletter @miss-celestial-being @thatgingefromtheinternet @javicstories @marianita195 @feliciab1990
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kenphobia · 1 year
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AKSHEJ I LOVE YOUR WRITING!! Could be possibly get more yan Wally?? I have like a horrible staring problem and usually make eye contact like a pro when talking to people due to my parents just driving those mannerisms into me lmao how would Wally react to someone with somewhat similar manners to him? Hope you have a good day/night <3333
EYE CANDY!
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"And I have a sweet tooth."
summary. wally couldn't help but be interested when the new neighbor also has a habit of staring. i wonder how that turned out? (headcanons / rewritten / see end notes)
contents. too much fluff. one-sided julie x reader because mmmm, funny little fuzzy man is happy.
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✦ Staring was something Wally enjoyed doing. He didn't do it out of malicious intent— sometimes, he does but that's a story for another time —but rather people fascinate him a lot. From the way they dress and move to how they interact with others and the environment around them, it sounds a bit silly and weird but it's something he just can't control.
✦ He supposed it was because of him being an artist. After all, he did spent a lot of his time training his eye to focus on every tidbit of detail in his muses. The roundness of an apple's form, the colorful patterns on Frank's vest that doesn't seem to shift along with his movements, the cute little pads on Barnaby's feet— he had it all jotted down in his mind and every one of his paintings seemed reference his friends or the neighborhood.
✦ Or maybe he's just bored, dissociating on random ocassions that he couldn't help but fix his eyes on something. Maybe it was just that, but god was he so happy you're also doing the same thing as him.
✦ It happened during a simple hangout within your friend circle and Wally caught you staring at him. He stared, of course, unblinking as always but you also stopped blinking.
✦ The unprompted staring contest ended after you finally blinked, your eyes tearing up slightly. Wally laughed and offered you his handkerchief to which you gratefully accepted and wiped your tears away.
"Hey, Frank." Julie whispered to her best friend, "What are they doing?" She pointed towards the bench where you and Wally just kept on staring at each other, unblinking and unmoving like mannequins.
Frank looked from the book he was reading, squinting his eyes at you two. "I have... no idea, Julie. Can I please go back to reading now?" He sighed in exasperation, tired from not having a single peaceful moment with any of his cheery neighbors buzzing on and about.
Another puppet plopped herself down next to Julie and Frank. "Ooh, what are you two doing? Spying on the new neighbor again?" It was Sally, giggling herself silly as she nudged the unfortunate Frank's arm.
"I am not spying on them." Frank glared at Sally, his frown deepening. "I never have been and it was mostly Julie doing that since she's too nervous to even approach them."
"I'm not nervous!" Julie argued, her face flushing red. "They're just so pretty and I don't wanna make a bad impression! I know you'd also do the same if you saw a pretty person, Frank." She puffed her cheeks, crossing her eyes as she squinted her eyes at the puppet.
"Ooo, does Frankie have a crush?" Sally's eyes lit up at Julie's words.
Frank quirked a curious brow. "What's that supposed to mean—"
"Hey, guys! What are you doing here?" Eddie's voice suddenly rang through the air as he jogged up to the trio. His arms rested on the back of the bench, pushing his body weight forward as he leaned. "Is that Wally and (Name)?"
Frank immediately stood up, his face flushed for a moment before it went back to its normal grey color.
"Oh, hey Eddie!" Sally greeted, raising her hand up to the mailman who gladly gave her a high five. "Frank and Julie are spying on them!"
Frank's face bursted suddenly in warmth. "Stop lumping me with Julie's—"
"Oh hush, Frank. I know you just as interested as we are. I mean, look at them!" Sally jabbed her hands to your and Wally's direction as if she was presenting a business proposal to the three.
"I think we should let them be, okay?" Eddie smiled, patting Sally's head. Sweat dripped down from his forehead, sliding off his cheeks in a nervous, almost jittery manner. "They're just doing a staring contest, nothing to worry about."
"I mean, that is true..." Julie hummed, pushing her lips in a form of a pout. "Wally really likes staring, and (Name) too!"
Frank shrugged, crossed his arms and leaned on the back of the bench. "Match made in heaven, I supposed."
Your staring competition with Wally came to an abrupt stop when you hear Julie scream and see her tackling Frank to the ground. Sally was cheering for Julie in the sidelines while Eddie is desperate trying to stop them from fighting.
"What in the world—?"
✦ ... Moving on! Wally would never admit it but he does get flustered by your stare at times, especially in moments where he's extremely chatty and he catches you looking at him. Bonus points if you did that little smile that his heart always go kaboom though.
✦ He'd find himself tongue tied and his face burning redder than the color red itself! If you could just excuse him for a moment, he's just gonna scream into a pillow, thank you.
✦ Wally's glad that someone is like him and it reassures him that staring is a common habit people have. Not that he's insecure about it, no! He's proud of his eyes and his staring, he just loves having someone to bond over it. It's the little things that makes it special for him <33
"You know, Neighbor... Your eyes are really beautiful, have I ever told you that?" Wally asked during a little sleepover you two had one day.
"You told me that a long time ago, Wally." You chuckled, patting his head. You gently combed your fingers through his hair, it was weird seeing it down but you wouldn't deny he was beautiful.
"Oh, Ha. Ha." Wally merely said before laughing. "Ha, I see. But they are really beautiful, you know?" He mumbled, snuggling closer to you as he wrapped his arms around you. He closed his eyes and buried his face in your chest for warmth.
"I love you, (Name)."
"I love you too, Darling."
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author's note. this was rewritten to be non-yandere since it was barely even yandere in the first place sjshshd but yeah!! this one gets to stay up lol
also this is my entire masterlist, wooe
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tlou-reid · 4 months
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How You Get the Girl ❆ Pope Heyward
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☃︎SUMMARY: pope doesn't know how to end conversations correctly and it puts his relationship on the line.
☃︎WARNINGS: angst, kinda short, kiara is rude in this lmao, i was very uninspired so this is not that great
☃︎swiftmas masterlist!
.。❅⋆⍋∞。∞⍋⋆❅。.
Stand there like a ghost, shaking from the rain.
You knew who it was before you even opened the door. The pounds on your door were loud, but not aggressive. Pope had texted you, asking if it was okay if he came by to talk. You didn’t answer, but you knew he would come anyway.
You were mad, that much was obvious. Not the silly kind of mad you’d get when Pope stuck his spoon into your frozen yogurt or the loving kind of mad you’d get when JJ made him do something stupid and you worried about him. No, you were the kind of mad that had both of you questioning whether or not you were still dating.
It had been two days since you last spoke to him. Friday night, standing at the party, beer in your hand, and JJ begging you to walk away. You couldn’t remember when he had joined the conversation, but him pulling you away was the only thing that kept you from slapping Kiara right across her kooky fucking face.
You hadn’t heard the full story or the full conversation between Pope and Kiara, but you were mad the second you heard commenting on the dress you were in, telling Pope that you’d really decided to show off tonight. You knew she was hesitant to accept you, but you didn’t think she was actively plotting against your relationship with Pope. He’d already told you about their history, but it seemed like there were feelings still lingering.
While Kiara had been the one to stab the dagger into you, Pope was the one who twisted when he let out a sigh, mumbling a “yeah”, before trying to change the topic. He didn’t stick up for you, didn’t defend you from Kiara’s baseless accusations that you were trying to impress other people. Instead, he agreed and moved on. Anything to please her, you thought.
Since this was the little bit of the conversation you had heard before you blew up on them, you had spent the whole weekend overthinking and coming up with other hurtful things they could’ve been saying about you. You’d convinced yourself they were true, which led you to avoid the entire Pogue friend group all weekend.
So now, here Pope was, hoping he could patch up your wounds and go back to the happy relationship you’d been in. He stood in the cold rain, the chill from the coming outer banks winter was nipping at him, making his face pale and his nose gain a pink hue.
She’ll open up the door, and say are you insane?
“Are you insane?” You asked when you fully opened the door, ushering him inside. No matter how mad you were at him, you didn’t want him to get sick. You still loved him after all. He stepped in quickly, seeking both the warmth your house provided and to be closer to you.
“Y/N,” he was out of breath as if he had run here. “I’m sorry for whatever you think you heard, but I promise I wasn’t saying anything bad about you.” He was talking fast like he didn’t think he’d have time to get everything he wanted to say out. “I would never, ever say anything bad about you or believe anything anyone else says.”
“Pope, I heard you agree with her.” You rolled your eyes, crossed your arms over your chest, and took a step away from him. He knew you were being defensive. He could only imagine how much hearing that interaction must’ve hurt your feelings. All Pope wanted to do was go back and tell Kiara to stop, to walk away from the conversation entirely, to get up and go dance with you instead of listening to her. But he couldn’t. So, here he was, trying his hardest to get you to listen.
Say it’s been a long six months and you were too afraid to tell her what you want.
“No!” He exclaimed, growing frustrated with his inability to find the right words to say. “Y/N, please,” he was growing desperate, tired of the space between you two. “I just wanted her to shut up! I don’t know what’s going on with her! I wanted her to stop talking and I wanted to go dance with you, but I’m stupid and I didn’t.” Pope looked crazed, eyes wide and arms flailing to emphasize his points.
“You didn’t defend me!” You exasperated. Your voice cracked as you basically yelled at him. You wanted him to see how bad he hurt you. Kiara, you could deal with. She was just a girl who was friends with your boyfriend. But, Pope was your everything.
“I know,” Pope’s voice was gentler now, “I know. I should’ve. I should’ve told her that you can dress however you want. That you could’ve shown up in a trash bag, or even naked, and I still would’ve shown you off. I don’t care what people think or see or feel about you. I should’ve told her that but I didn’t and I’m so sorry.” At this point, Pope’s eyes were beginning to fill with tears.
“She’s gonna keep doing this,” You informed, cocking your hip to the side. If he was going to allow her to, there was no point in this conversation. His words were sweet and calmed your overthinking, but you needed change to happen.
“I won’t let her,” Pope sighs out, taking a step closer to you. He relaxed a bit when you didn’t step away from him. “I’ll tell her to stop and that I’m not going to talk to her if she doesn’t.” You could tell by his face how serious he was. His dark eyes were boring into yours.
He took another step towards you, “Please, don’t let this be the end of his. I’ve had a wonderful six months with you.” You held eye contact for a moment, before taking quick steps to wrap your arms around his waist. He didn’t waste any time pulling you close to him. “I’m sorry,” he breathed into the top of your head.
You nodded, letting the tears fall onto his shirt. He pressed a kiss to the top of your head. When you pulled away, he kept his hands on your waist. Pope pulled in for a kiss. You couldn’t stop the words from leaving your mouth as you pulled away, “I love you.”
He smiled as you uttered the three words he’d been waiting for the first time. He’d already said them, but it was taking you just a bit longer. He wasn’t too worried about it, as he could see the way you loved him in the things you did.
“I love you, too.”
And that’s how it works, that’s how you get the girl.
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svltzmans · 7 months
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out of the woods - h.m.
a/n: i'm back with longer fics again! i was in a bit of a dry spell with inspiration but i'm finally getting back to it! you might be asking "lizzie will you ever stop naming your stories after taylor swift songs?" and the answer is no ❤️
warnings: smut (18+), kinda angsty? but not really, hope has her humanity off for a bit and her and reader are exes (but not for long), this is very very soft and the smut is pretty tame lmao, i didn't edit this at all
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"you're just not the person i fell in love with anymore."
the moment y/n broke up with hope was still a blur. hope's humanity shutdown was rough on everyone involved, but she never would have expected losing the love of her life over it.
at the same time, she understood. now that she had her humanity on, she realized how coldhearted she had become and the way she treated y/n reflected her lack of sympathy.
it hadn't took long for hope to realize that she had made a huge mistake. sure, she had little control over the way she acted when her humanity was off. regardless, she still mistreated y/n and lost her in the process.
y/n knew that she loved hope, and she was sure that she could cope with her supernatural qualities, including her occasional lack of humanity.
however, y/n quickly realized having humanity-less hope as a girlfriend was harder than she had imagined.
any kind of affection from her girlfriend was almost entirely out of the question. it felt like the person she loved had disappeared, and it was too much to handle.
ever since the breakup, hope had been determined to win y/n back. she understood that the trust between them had diminished and it would be hard to show y/n that her recent behavior was behind her.
y/n was apprehensive when she interacted with hope. she wasn't cold, but she certainly wasn't warm either. she just didn't believe that hope truly had turned her humanity back on, knowing that a vampire with their humanity off could be beyond tricky and manipulative.
a major part of her believed that hope would never do anything to hurt her, humanity or not, but she just couldn't take that risk.
hope had tried to open up to y/n about her humanity and tell her that she was truly back, but y/n would just brush her off.
"i just need more time," she would say, and hope would solemnly nod in understanding.
eventually, hope couldn't cope with y/n's indifference any longer.
"y/n, please just talk to me."
y/n finally agrees to sit down with hope, avoiding eye contact with her ex-girlfriend.
"please look at me, y/n. i miss you so much. i know i was awful to you."
y/n reluctantly looks up, locking eyes with hope.
"how do i know it's really you, hope? how can i believe you?"
hope can't help but feel hurt by y/n's lack of trust, but she knows she would feel the same way if she was in y/n's position.
"i've spent every minute of every day thinking about you, y/n. you are everything to me and it kills me that i hurt you so badly. i wasn't myself and i know that's not an excuse. but god y/n, i miss you so much. and i'm so sorry."
y/n softens at hope's words, realizing that she was being genuine.
"i miss you too. and i'm sorry for blowing you off. i guess i was just scared. i know you wouldn't hurt me. i just couldn't bring myself to talk, i didn't know if you were actually back or not."
"i'm here, y/n. and i'm never going away again."
hope tentatively brings her face closer to y/n's, waiting for a reaction.
when she doesn't get one, she presses her lips to y/n's.
when hope finally pulls away after what feels like an eternity, y/n wraps her arms around her tightly.
"i'm so glad you're here, hope. really here. i missed you."
hope melts into y/n's arms, allowing her head to rest on her shoulder.
"hope?"
"yeah?"
"be mine again. please."
hope doesn't respond, opting to kiss y/n again instead.
hope is gentle in every sense of the word, her hand gently resting on y/n's cheek, gently coaxing her to lay down.
she takes her time, wrapping her arms around y/n as she kisses her.
hope toys with the wastline of y/n's sweatpants, running her fingers over her stomach.
"may i?" she asks tentatively, looking deeply into y/n's eyes as she awaits her response.
"thought you'd never ask," y/n laughs quietly before attaching her lips to her girlfriend's once more.
hope's touch remains gentle as she dips below y/n's underwear. she studies y/n's face carefully, ensuring that she is completely okay with what she's doing.
"that's my girl. always doing so good," hope coos, listening to y/n's gentle whines.
when y/n falls over the edge, she wraps herself around hope again, wanting to be as close to her as possible.
hope holds y/n for some time, running her hand over her back.
just when hope thinks y/n has dozed off, she hears her sleepily mutter something in her ear.
"i love you."
hope wasn't sure if she would ever hear y/n say that again, and she feels relief flooding her whole body at her words.
"i love you so much, y/n."
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megamilfluvr · 9 months
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Headcanons about Kate
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These are just a few things I personally deem as headcanon about Kate, after rewatching and analyzing her interactions and personality traits. Please remember that this is just my perception of her. If you have anything you consider to be headcanon about Kate let me know.
- likes being playful and teases you a lot
- leans against EVERYTHING (example: doors, counters, couches, tables. hell, she’d probably even lean against you if you let her lmao)
- manspreads. always. (if you ask why she sits that way she’ll tell you “i don’t know. it’s just comfortable,” and you know what i can’t argue that)
- can’t sit straight. (if you find her sitting properly, it’s probably because of a formal gathering or a meeting)
- likes stealing kisses from you (you could be sitting, standing, laying down it doesn’t matter she’ll still manage to steal one from you. AND ITS ADORABLE)
- randomly does something that only makes sense to her and just confuses you (things like her leaving a half empty cup ramen with tinfoil over it and her explanation? “what? i was in a hurry to leave.”)
- always wears socks
- loves cereal, specifically Frosted Flakes
- can accurately shoot up to five arrows at the same time
- loves to spoil you
- sometimes likes to splurge on perfumes (she’s not big on jewelry but fragrances? absolutely.)
- has a spacific playlist for working out
- made a playlist for you
- can’t take care of live plants, so she buys fake ones (she just doesn’t have a green thumb. any greenery you see in her apartment or dorm isn’t real lmao)
- loves target
- tried to hit the target logo with a plunger arrow (this is very on brand for kate)
- somehow burned water??? (we’ve established that she can’t cook multiple times by almost burning the apartment down. the one time the apartment burned, wasn’t her fault, but still kinda was lmao)
- collects squishmallows (she definitely buys the 24 inch squishmallows)
- if she doesn’t get her way she’ll start cutely pouting
- gets flustered when you’ve out rizzed her
- loves to act cocky around you (whatever you do don’t challenge her to a game of fencing, she wins. she’ll let that go to her head lmao)
- loves going to the movie theater with you
- gets excited to get a slushy and popcorn
- when she talks about you to someone she gets shy
- mumbles stuff under her breath (when she was talking with yelena in episode 6 she’s LITERALLY doing it. “yeah, i know what box mac n cheese tastes like, okay? i know it’s- i know it’s delicious.”)
- she’s insecure about her rambling but you always reassure her that it’s fine and you’re listening
- she’s spent too much money on a gaming pc
- only owns a pair of boots (it doesn’t matter what she’s wearing, she’s going to wear her boots even if it’s a dress)
- super clumsy (somehow in the field she’s good at not being clumsy, but oh my god she’ll make your blood pressure spike 100%)
- always thinks outside of the box (it's impressive how quickly she thinks on her feet)
- is surprisingly calm under certain serious situations (i mean she took down men double her size running right at her, i’d panic and run the opposite direction)
- doesn’t give up easily which results in her being stubborn sometimes
- you having to remind her to shut up or low her voice in very quiet places (you could be on a mission with her and a few others and she just randomly “hey, did you see that tiktok i sent you this morning?” “SHHH, is now really the time for that?”)
- will send unhinged texts at worse time (you’re both in a debriefing and she’ll just text something like, “okay, so hear me out… we kidnap him.” “what?! no. kate we’re not about to steal rocket!”)
- loves sending memes (that’s literally all of her tiktok fyp)
- ALWAYS LOSES HER APARTMENT KEYS (someone give this girl a tile… you know what she would also end up losing that too lmao)
- loves ring but ends up losing them
- has a matching arrow necklace with you (again, she doesn’t wear rings much since she’s always losing them, so she’d go with a bracelet or necklace)
- loves hats, hoodies and sweatpants (after seeing that one picture of hailee wear her hawkeye hat, it’s headcanon for kate)
- still somehow makes you laugh even when you’re upset with her
- it doesn’t matter what time of day it is, when she’s been assigned a mission. she’ll always make time to video chat with you
edited: i’ve proofread this like three times, if there’s still typos or anything just ignore them lmao
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Text
Ash and Ibe's dynamic is so underrated, which is understandable because we don't see much of it.
But in the five stories (03) "Other voices, Other rooms" we see more of Ash and Ibe together and it's probably my favorite because their interactions are so wholesome 🥺
youtube
Here are my favorite moments:
(Info: Ibe thinks back to the time they all spent in Cape Cod)
Ibe saying that present Ash looks similar to smiling Griff 🥺
Ash slyly asking Ibe if he has pictures of Eiji's pole vaulting career.. I see you Ash
+ Ash sounding genuinely disappointed that Ibe doesn't have the pictures of Eiji with him 🤭
We get a tiny little bit more information on just HOW bad Eiji's mental state must have been in Japan with Ibe saying that bringing Eiji to the US was an "emergency evacuation"
No but seriously Ibe uses words like "abducted" to describe how he got Eiji out of there
So despite literally being in life-threatening danger CONSTANTLY, Ibe confirms that he has never seen Eiji any happier UHM
Also Ibe says Eiji seems more lively ESPECIALLY around Ash 🥺🥺🥺
Literally right after Ibe tells Ash that Eiji has changed (for the better) you can hear the most SOFTEST gasp from Ash I'M CRYING
"Have you had Ei-chan tell you anything about Japan?"
"Gomen."
Ibe teaching Ash Japanese except it's an Osakan dialect, which already has some differences to the "standard" Tokyo dialect but even better; some of the words Ibe teaches him are usually only heard in Osaka,,,, Ibe is literally teaching Ash old slang
ON TOP OF THAT Ibe explains these are popular Japanese phrases "right now" which,,,, sorry Ibe you're just getting old LMAO
"Hey don't teach me anything weird. I won't remember it anyway." Meanwhile 20 episodes later and Ash can perfectly reminisce all japanese phrases Ibe taught him to Eiji 💀
Ash is so cute here 🥺 he's repeating the phrases to himself and actually takes it seriously to pronounce them right
Max walks in and Ash IMMEDIATELY starts using the new phrases and Max is just like "wtf"
Max "I can at least speak Japanese" followed by random japanese words that don't have any connection BAHAHA
The only coherent sentence Max forms is "Please don't touch the dancers." Max wtf did you do 🤨
At the end Ibe is scared how Eiji will react when he finds out what he has been teaching Ash 😭
Highly recommend y'all to check it out and the other parts too !!! It's healing for the soul
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whatthefishh · 10 months
Text
bloom for me
Series Masterlist
Regency Santiago Garcia x f!reader
A/N: Reader has a nickname (Wis) because I thought it flowed better with a title considering the regency times. Forgive me for historical inaccuracies it’s all fun and games here 😭🩷
Warnings: this chapter will have mentions of sex, pining, probably cringe writing, idk I just need to put this out there, be gentle pls. This has a real plot I promise lmao.
Words: 3k
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He’s brooding again. It wouldn’t be such a big deal if he wasn’t so outwardly affected by his inner thoughts, whatever they may be. So now, you’re stuck standing next to the most disagreeable man at this week’s ball, patiently awaiting someone amiable to come and rescue you with a dance or two.
“Stand taller, you look like you want to leave.”
“Funny, coming from a man who needs a cane to walk before the sun starts to set.”
Sharply turning his head to cast you a withering look before anyone was the wiser, you started fanning yourself to hide the smirk you were sporting. You knew exactly how to rile him up and he hated you for it. He looked ridiculously handsome even while angrily grumbling to himself about your manners. Unfortunately for you, his outward appearance had more than fooled you into believing he was quite possibly the prettiest man you’d ever seen. His black curls slightly greying, and the tanned skin of his neck defining the muscles you were sure spread far over his whole body, the very same muscles you tried not to eye in his fitted pantaloons. Not even his desirability could make up for how he got under your skin, however, how quickly he could make your blood boil with just a few words. Besides, he was such a disagreeable man that it would be such a misfortune to be liked by him. To think, you have to spend the whole season with him for company.
Santiago Garcia was a well respected, strong willed and overall charming man of the military - well, he was an ex-lieutenant, to your father actually. A shot in the leg worsened into such a state that he could not sustain another call to fight, leaving him walking with a cane on particularly bad days. Injury in the field will bring a soldier home quicker than a woman in waiting. Not that he had one of those either. A charming man, Santiago was highly favoured by the women of the town due to his roguish good looks and silver tongue. The man could easily sway a crowd of people to follow him into the river if he so pleased.
His brave acts during his time in the British Army, although risky, yielded him high praise amongst the upper levels of society upon his return. So much so, that your newly widowed father, the Colonel, had apparently taken quite a liking to him in the times they’ve interacted. Your father had taken this liking one step further than most would, inviting Santiago into your spacious home upon his arrival. Not only does the man standing next to you sleep under the same roof as you, but has also been tasked as your personal chaperone for the marriage season. How they came to this agreement over post-dinner brandy is lost on you but regardless, you couldn’t bring yourself to be honest with your father, bile rising in your throat at the thought of crushing any friendship he found comfort in after the passing of your mother.
Your mother.
Your father spent a lot of time overseas, giving space for the love you had for your mother to grow beyond measure. He was quick to spoil you, however, finding it easier to show his affection with the latest fashion, shoes, jewellery, ribbons for your hair, chocolates from overseas, and chocolates from in town; he would give it all if only you looked at him. Your mother, however, was basically your best friend. The two of you spent hours in the family greenhouse, teaching you all about her love of botany until you were old enough to start growing your favourite flowers without her help. She tragically passed during the winter, the harsh cold taking hold of her lungs until she couldn’t bear it anymore. The nickname she gave you stuck, however, and in the months following her passing, you refused to be acknowledged by another title.
“May I request the lady’s presence to have the honour of the next dance?” a new voice pulled you out of your stupor, looking up to see a decently handsome young man extending his hand towards you.
“No, you may not, I’m afraid her dance card is already full.” Santiago answered for you, not only shutting down your new suitor, but fixing him with a stare so intense he was shaking as he quickly nodded and turned to leave. You could see him return to his support group, the other boys clapping him on the back for trying regardless of the intimidating gargoyle meant to guard you. Ironically, your dance card was not full, unless you counted Santiago’s own name on every line. Not that he ever danced with you.
You sighed heavily. Another wasted night, getting dressed up for a party in which you were just going to be rejecting any poor man who had the gall to approach and ask for a dance. This isn’t the first time he spoke for you, harshly turning someone down before you could get the words out on your own.
You suppose that’s what he thinks is his job, as your chaperone of the season. Your father trusted Santiago’s judgement of character to filter out potential suitors but as of now, it seemed, that he was just saying no for the heck of it.
“Don’t look so put out, Miss Wisteria,” Santiago murmured next to you, the nickname falling off his tongue smoothly. “This way, you leave them all wanting. Besides, I looked into most of these men. That one has debts at the racing club that he has yet to pay out.”
Even though he had a point, you couldn’t help but be envious of the girls whose mothers were at the party with them, encouraging dancing and interaction. You had gotten yourself ready with the help of your best handmaidens, taking their opinions for your outfit with zeal. You grew up without siblings, thus enjoying the friendly conversation you had with the house staff. Not that anyone outside the household knew how close you were with them, the notion of a lonesome girl without a mother, so desperate for human interaction that she reach beneath her status.
Coming downstairs in a soft lilac dress, the tulip sleeves and neckline lined with tiny sparkling beads, matching the delicate crystal necklace you donned to bring the look together. Your maid had also added some shimmering hair pins to your updo, only visible from the back of your head, which was your favourite part of your outfit. You felt rather pretty, and by the way Santiago had stared, slightly slack-jawed at you descending the staircase before collecting himself, you thought maybe he thought so, too. That was before he opened his mouth to complain about being on time and reminded you why you disliked him so.
“I was not aware of his debts. Thank you, I suppose.”
“Yes, well… that is why I am here, is it not? Your father asked me to—”
“My father asked you what exactly? Because I still don’t recall ever being told why he had to go and ask someone with the likes of you for help in this matter!” You whispered back vehemently.
“Do you truly esteem me so little?”
His soft voice betrayed his hurt, causing you to stop and look up at him in shock. This wasn’t so far off from your usual tone towards him, the two of you often bickering under your breath in the presence of others. Trying to gauge his true feelings by gazing into his espresso eyes, you concluded that maybe you were being too harsh on him. Maybe this wasn’t the ideal way he’d rather spend his time at a ball, supervising a girl’s courting experience and vetting the bachelors. No, he would probably be with the other gentlemen his age, swatting away the interested women like fleas in monsoon season.
You took a second to look at him for any tell of a lie, any sign he wasn’t as offended as you initially had thought, but the longer you looked at him the more distracted you got. Taking in the stoic man’s face, the crinkles around his eyes, the darkening shadow across his jaw as his hair was growing in, it all suited him so well that it almost had you even more angry at him for his beauty. Santiago was not that much older than you when you thought about it, probably somewhere under a decade of difference, which was not uncommon in some marriages.
Marriages? You thought with a slight panic, whipping your head to look back at the crowd, fanning yourself a little faster now. The moment had slipped from your glove-covered hands, whatever pull there was keeping your eyes trained on him you had snapped free from. In good timing, it seems, as another pathetic attempt at asking for a turn around the room was making his way towards you both. You could almost hear Santiago’s groan before the gentleman stopped in front of you, offering you a charming smile.
“Mr. Garcia,” the gentleman bowed his head to both of you after addressing you as well. “Might I have this dance?”
“Are you asking Mr. Garcia, or myself?” you ask with a short laugh, seeing as he had posed the question to your companion.
The man gave a genteel smile. “I was trying to be respectful of the present company. I know Mr. Garcia hasn’t danced all evening so this might be a chance to find him a partner.”
Your eyes flit to your companion, silently pleading with him to let at least one attempt slide past his defences.
Santiago looked at you for a moment, clearly seeing the hopefulness in your eyes before turning his eyes back on the gentleman in front of you, seemingly having come to a decision.
“Lord Miller, you make a fair judgement. I do not usually partake in such diversions, although I have been complimented on my light footedness. Miss Wisteria, if you wish to dance with Lord Miller, we shall take our leave soon after.”
The way your mother called you Wisteria oftentimes was much different to the way Santiago has been calling you that, and you tried not to think about it for too long.
Although Santiago’s words were light and jovial, you could tell from the set of his brow that he still was not entirely comfortable with the arrangement. That didn’t stop you from nearly jumping at the opportunity to dance with the handsome Lord, smiling graciously as you accepted his still-extended hand.
Making your way to the dance floor, you noticed more than a few pairs of eyes on you, probably wondering how Lord Miller made it past your sleeping dragon keeping you locked away in your proverbial tower. Keeping your chin up and not letting their eyes make you stumble, you took position for the dance.
“I will admit, Miss Wisteria, I find myself in raptures over your acceptance of this dance.”
“You flatter me, Lord Miller.”
“I cannot help it. You look exceptionally beautiful tonight. Also, if I may be so bold, I have seen how you’ve longed to dance, and thus, I took it upon myself to brave the glower of your guardian and rescue you.”
You laughed heartily at that. The conversation continued with Lord Miller discussing your shared interests in literature and past travels, and how many balls you both attended in the past two weeks alone. Lord Miller was an excellent dancer, making you feel as though you barely had to put in any effort to be gliding around the dance floor.
Santiago tried his best not to stare, he really did, but the way you let your head fall back in a carefree laugh at something the Lord had said to you had captured his attention unwillingly.
The thing was, you see, he was not supposed to be wanting after his ward, temporary or not. He was not supposed to watch longingly after you, walking away from him, whisked away by another more suitable potential partner, or at any other time when you weren’t watching him. He was also not supposed to jerk himself off to the thought of you in his bed, under your father’s roof, imagining how tight and wet you would be for him, how loud you would moan his name. Would you let him worship you with his hands and mouth? Would you still fight with him during the act or would you go pliant under his devoted attention?
You were a constant thorn in his side, reminding him at every chance of the magnitude of your dislike for him, your eyes meeting his angrily during your daily spats. You never gave him a chance to earn your friendship, immediately jumping to hostility once the news of him chaperoning you for the season had reached your ears. How was he to refuse your father, the generous man who offered him access to his estate as if he were a long lost son and not an old colleague? Besides, he didn’t think much of it at the time, assuming it would be an easy feat, the world of courting running its own gears for longer than he has been in the game.
Frankly, he assumed there would be at least one meddling old croon trying to pair everyone up for the season based on her predictions but she had yet to turn up to help him along.
Santiago didn’t see his attraction to you getting in the way of finding you a suitable match, but unfortunately for him, he was wading through a pool of pathetic potentials, finding a reason to reject them at every turn. It was becoming increasingly difficult to give reason for their inadequacy, not wanting to hand you off to a lesser man.
Every ball you attended together, every promenade you walked with him trailing behind you, he was doomed to watch the men flirt with you, make you laugh, share lingering glances with, and every day felt more tortuous than the last. He learned a lot about you this way, but it never felt enough. He was stuck as an observer, watching from the outside.
Was this his destiny? To fall hopelessly for his friend’s daughter and not only watch her dance with other men but be the one to hand her off to them, lying through his teeth about his feelings on the matter?
It especially did not help his case with how ethereal you looked tonight, or any night for that matter. He could not count the number of times he has thought back to that first night he stayed in your home, running into you on your way to the greenhouse at night with your white nightgown. It was basically see through, the candle you were holding sinfully illuminating your figure, nipples pebbled in the cool air. He had been on his way to the kitchen for a glass of water, being unable to sleep properly in his new chambers. You nearly dropped it when you bumped into him around the corner, his hand steadying you before you could, saving you from waking up the whole house. Santi wanted to kiss you silly every day since then.
Bringing his focus back to the present, he heard the quartet queuing up for the next song and soon saw Miller escort you back to him with your hand tucked into his arm. You were positively beaming, shifting your eyes to his with a question posed on your lips.
“Lord Miller was just telling me how he and his brother often go for boat rides on the lake near town. He has invited us to accompany him on an outing tomorrow afternoon if it is agreeable with you?”
You were blinking at him meaningfully, alerting him to the fact that they were waiting for his response on the matter. The longer he took to answer, the more stilted the silence between the three of them and the worse chance it was for you to leave the season with a suitable partner. A throat cleared, snapping Santiago out of his stupor.
“A turn about the lake sounds splendid for tomorrow! We would be delighted.” Santiago tried not to sound like he was bursting from happiness at this turn of events but he also knew that on paper, Lord Miller was of good stock and well in stature, making him a fine potential suitor for you.
“Wonderful, thank you, Mr. Garcia,” Miller bowed his head to him first before turning to you to bid you goodnight. “I am dearly looking forward to tomorrow.” He said the necessary pleasantries before leaving you two to stew in the silent aftermath.
The rest of the night passed rather normally, Santiago fetching you refreshments when your hands emptied, and before you knew it, you were finding yourself in the carriage on your way home. If you didn’t know any better, you would think he was encouraging you to drink more so as to be able to get you to use the ladies’ room more, effectively removing you from wandering eyes.
The two of you didn’t speak much out of obligatory words, you were too excited about the prospect of a turn on the lake, and he was worried with a stone in his stomach about the same idea. Escaping to your respectful chambers, you were so wrapped up in your daydreams you barely said goodnight, leaving Santiago deeply unsettled and barely able to catch a wink of sleep.
Whether he was ready for it or not, tomorrow was arriving sooner than he wanted.
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starry-eyed-steve · 10 months
Note
What do you have against Ronance? It's clear Robin was attracted to Nancy as well as Vickie. Not only that, she jumped off a boat into monster-water for her, for goodness' sake. It's a bad-faith argument to say that people don't ship Vickie with Robin because she's a bisexual sapphic woman. Greatwise/Will and Gareth is not comparable in the slightest as that is a crack ship that never interacted. We DID have scenes with Robin and Vickie, though few.
And I'm gonna be So For Real, more people would ship Rovickie if Ronance was not there. People would devour those crumbs. But why choose crumbs, when you have a potential meal we spent a whole season with?
Okay, so this is really long, I'm sorry this took way too much time. I know I went a bit overboard. If there are any errors, please ignore lmao. Thank you for sending me an ask for a discussion. I also want to preface that I don't hate Nancy as a character, I don't like how she is written in certain situations and that the show overlooks mistakes she makes, and by pointing out those mistakes on her behalf is not me hating on her. Overall, I think she deserves better than what she is given both in the show and fandom.
First things first, Robin didn't jump into the water for Nancy. It was a delayed response after seeing her best friend being dragged under water. She's not as brave as Nancy. If we would apply the same logic, then Eddie would have jumped for Robin because he's in love with her. So no Robin jumped for Steve and should have been the first to do so, but because that scene was used for Stancy later (Eddie giving the speech to Steve in the woods) it had to be Nancy in that instance. It's really bothering me that this scene is so misread because people just don't get Robin's character. Who would you jump for, your best friend you know better than yourself or the girl you met a day ago?
The whole premise of Ronance (platonic or romantic) in s4 was so ooc for Robin, s3 Robin would have never acted the way like s4 Robin did. And I think that has something to do with what I said in the other post. We don't have enough time. There is no conflict when different groups of people come together because the show needs everyone to get along to save the world, and they couldn't elaborate on complex feelings a person might have towards others. So the show made Robin throw herself at Nancy's feet, despite thinking not too highly about her a season prior. Same with Steddie, the OG script was about how Steve and Eddie didn't get along first but it was cut out because there is no time to proper develop new relationships, even tho it would be more interesting. But again, that would mean the show would have to give us more episodes, which is unfortunately not the case.
So you see, I just don't think Robin would have acted the way she did around Nancy based on the character traits she displayed in s3. Furthermore, I will bring up Steve, which is a sensitive topic when it comes to Ronance. I don't want to come off as someone who in general makes a lesbian/sapphic relationship about a man's feelings, however because Steve has history with both girls I can't ignore him because Robin wouldn't either.
A little bit of background of Robin prior to meeting Nancy:
In s3, Robin couldn't stand Steve, and later, we found out why. It had mostly to do with her crush, Tammy Thompson, who had only eyes for him. Yeah, he was obnoxious, and Robin couldn't stand his smugness and arrogance, but the main reason was Tammy and her being kinda jealous of Steve in general because he had no problems fitting in. So she held on to this grudge against Steve for maybe even years. That tells us she doesn't forget when someone has wronged her and maybe, to an extent, her friends. Like she seems to be a person who has your back, no matter what.
Idk if you consider Rebel Robin as canon (I mean Maya narrated the podcast soo I mostly view it that way) but before Barb was Nancy's bff, she was close with Robin and later ditched her for Nancy. That in itself would leave a bad taste in Robin's mouth, and I guess she wouldn't be Nancy's biggest fan. Maybe that's why the priss comment in s3. Again, she had no problem disliking Steve because her crush liked him, but then she does an 180 with Nancy despite Barb being her actual friend leaving her for Nancy. Losing a friend to another person is much worse than a crush you never talked to, not liking you back or liking someone else.
But even if you ignore the Barb stuff and don't think it's canon, Robin still wouldn't be Nancy's biggest fan in the beginning and that has something to do with how Stancy ended and Jancy begun. You have to keep in mind Steve is Robin's bff, one if not the most important person in her life. He's everything to her she trusts him completely. He was maybe even the first person to know she was gay. Then why on earth would Robin A try to befriend Nancy, who broke his heart, and B trying to push her without a thought to get together with him again. It doesn't make any sense to me, based on how Robin was introduced.
Steve may have not any hard feelings for Nancy, maybe he only said positive things about her to Robin because he still views himself as the only person who fucked up in that relationship and not that Nancy was already in love with Jonathan for a while before things ended. Idk where you stand on the whole cheating thing, but it doesn't matter because rumors outside of the relationship would spread. Steve, the most popular guy in school, who is well liked, got left by his girlfriend of 1 year for the school freak, not even 2 days after a public fight. Like people would go crazy and Robin would have heard those rumors as well. You have to admit getting together with a new guy, not even after 48h is, I don't want to say weird, but not very cool, okay? Plus, Tommy would spread extra nasty shit because he hates Nancy and Jonathan and wants to hurt Steve as well. Robin would view her through those rumors, plus Steve having a hard time letting go, being heartbroken about it, there is no doubt in my mind that she wouldn't side eye Nancy.
Those two reasons, Barb and how Stancy ended, are the main ones as to why I think Robin was ooc for desperately wanting to befriend Nancy.
So the way I would have built up Ronance would be Robin being aloof towards her, and Nancy would have been the one who wanted to befriend her in the first place. Nancy never has to work for her relationships with others. People usually make the first move with her, so she never has to give much thought to it. Like Steve still loves her, Jonathan was ready to follow her wherever even if it endangered his family, and Fred followed her around like a lost puppy as well. And with Robin, it could have gone differently. Nancy should have made it her mission to make it up to Robin. Like she desperately wants a friend, she doesn't understand why Robin is being cold to her. By making her the instigator, Nancy would have to reflect on her mistakes and how she treated people, which would finally give her some personal character growth. Plus, it would have made the introduction to Stancy (romantic or platonic) way smoother and more balanced because Nancy never reflected on it. Steve's just available she doesn't have to make it up to him as well. Nancy never really addresses her faults in relationships, and the narrative in Stranger Things lets her off the hook every time. Letting Steve believe he was a terrible boyfriend despite liking Jonathan instead of him? No problem, no consequences. Steve still likes her. In s3 the show was again on her side when she fought with Jonathan by giving her the Karen pep talk, yes she apologized to him but she didn't understand his struggles really because she gave him the don't ever doubt me comment which kinda destroyed her apology imo. Furthermore, as soon as there was a rough patch in s4 with Jonathan, she expected him to come to her instead of going to him and fixing it because she has the financial means to do so, which indicates she still doesn't fully understand Jonathan's financial problems. Also, in general, Jonathan is terrified to tell her the truth, so he gets high to cope. It doesn't seem that he thinks Nancy is understanding.
Again, Robin could have been the person that would have made her realize wait, the way I take people for granted, and sometimes treat is wrong. Instead, we got yet another person instantly liking her and going along with everything she does, so Nancy never had to do anything for it, despite the obvious conflicts that should have arisen when they first met. But like I said before, the show doesn't have much time and focuses more on the plot, so there is no real development for characters, and everyone has to get along. I also think Stranger Things wanted a strong girl duo like Elmax, so they just threw Ronance together without conflict because they wanted to avoid drama, which would take up too much screentime. I can't emphasize the fact that Stranger Things suffers so much because it has too much plot and not enough time. Plus, I believe making Robin angry at Nancy on Steve's behalf would mean acknowledging that Stancy ended in a bad way or that Jancy maybe didn't have this cute start as a romance, but that would also mean recognizing Steve might have not been the only one who was wrong which is simply not possible. When s2 aired and people pointed out hey did Nancy cheat on Steve, did they really break up because a lot of people didn't view the fight in the ally as a break, especially because Nancy mentions she likes Steve at Murray's and Steve went to her house, the Duffers had to confirm it via interviews because I doubt they thought people would sympathize with Steve. Hence, why the narrative only blames him because they wanted the audience root for Jancy.
Long story short, I would have switched roles for platonic Ronance in the show. When it comes to romantic Ronance, that's mostly on the fandom. Everyone is allowed to ship whatever, I personally just don't think they are a good match. I don't see Nancy being patient enough with Robin's neurodivergent ways. She wouldn't handle her rambling over time very well. Nancy gets quickly irrated and snaps. Like Robin already felt the need to explain herself to her, making sure everything is okay because Nancy made her feel like her personality is too much and has faults, like her mom constantly tells her. Whereas with Vickie, she felt immediately at ease when they talked. More of that later. Robin is also poor, maybe a bit better off than Jonathan, but still, Nancy already doesn't get Jonathan's problems. Another reason is that because Steve is Robin's bff, Robin wouldn't want to date her all together. Like she sees Steve still likes her, she knows how much Nancy hurt him to a point that he is serial dating because he has like trust issues, that would immediately turn her off. Robin values Steve's friendship way too much than try to jeopardize it in any way. It's not like Steve wouldn't allow her to date Nancy, I think he would do everything to make Robin happy even if it costs his own happiness. Robin knows Steve. She would know that he would be hurt, and that's ultimately the factor that turns her off. Maya already confirmed that Robin values platonic relationships so much, so yeah. Just think about it that way. How would Robin feel if Steve suddenly would show interest in Vickie and starts dating her? That would be kinda fucked, same goes for Ronance, Robin knows Steve still likes her. I'm also a believer that you shouldn't necessarily date your bffs ex, it's just too messy especially if that relationship ended rather badly.
@findafight had this amazing post about one-sided Ronance, where they described exactly what I'm trying to convey. Nancy is the one interested, but ultimately, Robin declines because of her relationship to Steve. They also have several other posts about Ronance if you want to check it out. Another blog that discusses Ronance and has similar opinions is @thestobingirlie
What I dislike the most is that in Ronance, mostly Robin is only an ounce of her typical character. Her relationship with Steve is downplayed. She makes fun of him with Nancy, she lies to him about her relationship, even asks for sex advice in some fics which is just very weird and so ooc for her to do. Same goes for Steddie, as soon as either Steve or Robin go into a relationship both characters are so ooc, you almost don't recognize them, plus they only have time for their partners and their friendship gets sidelined, which again doesn't make sense for their characters. Ronance is also mostly beneficial to Nancy as it's viewed more how Robin can save her so she doesn't have to end up with a man. Hence, all the posts about how Robin is the only person who gets her, which is also such a shitty thing to say because both Jonathan and Steve were trying. Like Nancy's character development hinges more on her relationship with Robin than doing some soul-searching. Because for real, all her relationships so far are kinda meh because she doesn't know how to communicate properly with her partners, Robin wouldn't magically make everything better because she's a girl. Nancy needs to be single first and discover who she is without jumping in a new relationship. She needs therapy and has to work on her people skills to be a better partner for future relationships.
Also, so many people want Nancy to have a friend, and when Robin comes along, they immediately make it romantic. Robin can still be there for Nancy and understand her as a friend. I don't think she was romantically interested in Nancy in the show. She was actively pushing for Stancy. She only ever talked about being into Vickie romantically. Robin should be allowed to make a friend who is a girl without making it into a romance just because she is a lesbian. Lesbians can have platonic girl friends, lol. Fact is that so many see Robin interacting with a girl as romantic because she is looking at her and then ignore her real crush she talks about all the time.
Now to Rovickie and Vickie. What I meant with people not giving Vickie a chance because she's a girl and interested in a sapphic relationship is a common occurrence throughout fandoms in general. Guys are usually preferred when talking about characters or shipping. Girls have it so much harder. Like with Gareth, I don't think my comparison of him and Vickie was nonsensical or dumb. The fandom had no problems coming up with interesting headcanons for him, even outside the crackship. Almost all the hellfire boys, but especially Gareth because he's the most objectively attractive one of the group, got more love from the fandom. Vickie, on the other hand, is mostly used as the villain in Ronance fics, who is in the way of the main ship. People in general call her boring or too similar to Robin, which is insane because we have one scene where she rambles because she is talking to her potential crush. Also, being similar doesn't have to mean it's bad. Like I mentioned earlier, Vickie rambling is showing Robin it's okay to do so, which makes her feel immediately relaxed because she doesn't have to explain herself to Vickie. Not to mention the biphobia that runs through fandoms. The fact that Vickie had a boyfriend, who she broke up with, was enough. People usually headcanon Nancy as a lesbian than making her bi. Steve's only a bi icon when he's shipped with guys, like him dating a girl is seen as less valued or popular. Again, everyone can headcanon characters sexuality how they like, you do you it's just apparent that characters who are seen as bi are only celebrated for dating a person of the same sex.
Lastly, think about it if Vickie was a guy who was the love interest for Steve, there would be non-stop content for her. She would be well loved within the fandom. But Vickie is a girl, and if she were used as the love interest for Steve instead of Robin, she would also face the same scrutiny the already faces now. She's the villain in the way of ships because she's only a side character and not the full meal like you described. A male characters even with almost no screentime, will always get better treatment than female characters.
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yuwumeniji · 1 year
Note
Hi hi~! If you’re still taking requests at this time I was wondering: when do you think the Luxiem boys realized that they were truly and deeply in love with reader-Chan? This concept has been on my mind today >w< thank you if you answer this!
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Luxiem & Falling in love
WARNING: Please remember that I am writing about Luxiem based on their characters online and not of the people behind their vtuber avatars, thank you!
EXTRA NOTES: request thank you!! and just as a general thing, i've decided to do the requests out of order, so if you sent something earlier, i'll eventually get to yours if inspiration hits ^^
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GENERAL
i'll make up different scenarios for each boy! just a short reason (or long idk) as to how you guys met and how they started to develop feelings for the reader
what kind of person they are with a crush/interacting with their crush & how they are when truly in love ^^
i didnt proofread... just dont perceive my mistakes lmao
MORE UNDER THE CUT!
              ⊰᯽⊱┈───── ✧ ─────┈⊰᯽⊱
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IKE EVELAND
a school crush
at first, he doesn't think too much of it; maybe it's just a one time thing, maybe once the school day is over, he won't think about it, but then you started to appear in his dreams.
oh boy the dreams - don't get me wrong, they're pure, i swear
he doesn't really go out of his way to interact with you but instead waits for you to come up to him - luckily for ike, you seem to have a lot of questions about studying you'd like to ask him.
the type to be a bit on the quieter side when it comes to having a crush - in fact, he's the kind to quietly suffer from a one-sided crush.
he tends to stay away and avoid the person of his affection while craving your attention. he's very hot-and-cold in that sense
the moment he realized he truly had a crush on one of the top students in his grade (aka you in this scenario), his face flushes red. he starts kicking his feet in the air when thinking of you and draws little hearts around your name in his notebook
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LUCA KANESHIRO
The stranger he locked eyes with at a club
he spent all night trying to find you amongst the crowd of drunkards and party-goers like the prince looking for cinderella after the ball.
the moment he finds you, it's like roses filled his field of vision, the birds were chirping and he felt like he was the cleanest man alive (metaphorically speaking, he may be pure of heart but at the end of the day he is a true mafioso ((im not using that word correctly huh lmao)))
you both often meet at the same club every single time - and for every single time, it feels as if he is the only person looking at you amongst the crowd of people
he's the kind to be a little more bold when it comes to confronting his crush - he'll go out of his way to even serenade you
he wants to spend the utmost time with the target of his affection, from inviting you to dinners, taking you to movies, etc, but surprisingly, he's a little shy when it comes to asking the question
he doesn't really realize when he's truly in love with you until you started to take up space in his mind - if you ask him to earn 5 cents for every single time you've been on his mind, he'll only have 5 cents since you were always there
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MYSTA RIAS
Accidentally bumping into the reader as he rushes to another crime scene ; it was nearly at first sight
he was dashing around the city, trying to avoid spilling the beans of his latest case until he suddenly runs into the cafe door that you happened to open ‐ papers and other important documents fly through the air and all he could think about was how red and flustered you looked when accidentally hitting him
from that fateful meeting, the two of you would often bump into each other around the city by pure coincidence. they do say that after the third meeting, it must be meant to be.
he's either the kind of person who couldn't shut up about how much he likes this person and when someone asks him "why not ask them out?", he suddenly becomes super bashful and shy and "d'aww!!! do you think they like me too??"
or he's super lowkey about it until the point where you have to ask yourself "does he really have a crush?"
the moment he realizes he has feelings for you was just during an average conversation - you could be talking about your day, complain about other people or whatever, but mysta's mind seems to drift elsewhere ; "ah. i like this person."
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SHU YAMINO
The mysterious, but good-looking stranger on the bus you frequent
first it was sneaky glances, then it was taking the seat next to you and asking how are you and where are you going - you later find out that he's in the same school/workplace as you
from there, it started hanging out outside of the bus - taking you to different locations across the city and just spending time with each other
shu seems to be the kind of person who is lowkey about his crush - he just likes to be able to be near you and thinks that if he suddenly starts telling you how much he thinks about you, you could get scared off by that
in fact, he's also the kind to suffer from a one-sided crush as well - he'd rather have you happier with someone else than him sometimes even if it makes his heart hurt a little bit
the moment he realizes he has a crush on you, he says it feels as if something just clicked. like a gear shifted in the right way and a light started appearing around you. in his eyes, the world seemed a lot brighter after this realization.
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VOX AKUMA
Switched orders on accident at a local cafe
picture this - you're at your favourite cafe trying to get your favourite drink. you're distracted when suddenly you hear your name get called out to retrieve your order. the second you take a sip from the cup, it isn't yours.
you then meet the light tapping of someone's shoe (or... sandal?) against the cafe's floor and lo-and-behold; the akuma himself, holding your cup
he seems to take a liking to you, especially after you complained about his weird drink and he even gave you his number, strange.
from then, you would meet up often at the same cafe, discussing different culinary techniques and even teaching each other new things
vox seems like he'd be lowkey but very direct if asked about having a crush too, but fortunately for him, not one to suffer from a one-sided one either.
"do i like this person? of course i do."
he realizes he has a crush when he firmly believes that he can truly stay by the side of this person as equals. it's a cozy, warm feeling he feels in his heart when he realizes how much affection he feels for them.
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ladylooch · 10 months
Note
Hi, can you please write a timo meier imagine about reader and timo having sex and reader fakes an orgasim at night and tells some of the wags about it next day about how she really fooled him with her acting, not knowing that timo and his teammates overheard everything, his teammates laugh at him and timo gets embarrassed and upset at reader?
Eager Beaver with Timo Meier
A/N: Sometimes I write things and I’m like lmao a man would never say this, which is why we all love it 😆 Hahahaha. Poor Timo just wanted to show you a good time after he got home! Why you gotta do him like that!? Literally!
Word Count: 1.1k
Warnings: SMUT 18+ Content, Swearing, Angst. 
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Tonight, Timo is an eager beaver. He’s been on the road for a long time, bouncing around the  East coast. He came roaring into the bedroom when he got home, flipping the covers off your body and dive bombing your breasts. He spent time kissing along the swells, but then he was dipping into your pants with quick fingers that had you reeling trying to catch up to what was happening.
“Please tell me you are close.” He moans into your hair. His thrusts are sooooo slow. And you’re nowhere near there. But his breathing is picking up. And his moans are filling the air of your bedroom. And you think the right thing to do is to perform a little bit to help him out. 
“Yeah, baby. Feels so good.” You coo into his ear, tugging his ear lobe between your teeth. His jerky hips buck into you as you heighten your breathing, moaning his name and arching your back like you’re coming. Timo finishes inside of you, melting into your body afterwards. 
“I needed that.” He confesses, running his hand along your cheek. “It was too long of a trip. I hate missing you that much.” You smile, ignoring the guilt of your conscious that pokes at you for pretending.
He’s happy. You’re happy. No harm done. 
The following day, Timo is whistling as you and him walk into the Children’s hospital visit you both agreed to. A few other team members and their significant others are joining too. He is happy after being reacquainted with you and has an extra pep in his step at seeing some young fans too. The Sharks are filming the visit for a PR video, so both you and Timo get mic’d up when you enter.
“I think this is where I leave you.” He smiles, leaning down to kiss you. The boys are going to do room visits while the girls are heading to some arts and crafts time. “Thank you for coming. It means a lot to me.”
“I know. Me too.” You kiss him back with a little tongue that adds a bright glint to his eyes. 
“Last night not enough, eh?” You widen your eyes and laugh off the pinch of guilt. 
“Good night, huh?” Erik’s wife, Melinda, asks you.
“Ah, yeah I’m letting him think that.” You chuckle. You and Melinda have a good relationship and it feels silly to lie to her about something so minor. 
“Little bit of a show?”
“Eager beaver didn’t know how to wait.” You joke back. 
“Babe.” Timo calls urgently. “Your mic is hot.” You cringe, looking at Melinda who covers hers in shock too. You had completely forget. 
“Sorry.” You cringe, looking at the producer who shrugs like he doesn’t care.
“We can cut it out.”
You look over at Timo who’s cheeks are red and eyebrows pulled down in agitation over his blue eyes. Can the producers cut it out of his brain too? Shit. You open your mouth to say something and he shakes his head, walking off with the rest of the group to the elevators. You close your eyes, knowing him well enough to understand he is really upset. 
The day drags on, The kids are cute and you do your best to interact with a positive attitude. But all you want is to see Timo and explain. What you’ll say, you still haven’t figured out, but it has to be something to soothe him. 
At the end of the event, he is somehow in a worse mood than before while you’re walking to the car together.
“What the fuck was that?!” He snaps at you. “I just spent two hours being annihilated by the guys for that. In front of the PR team. And young kids.” 
“I’m sorry. I forgot about the mic.” 
“I don’t..” He trails off, hands slapping against his thighs as he keeps walking to the car. “I don’t know what to say.” He completes his thought when you’re both in the car. You try to reach for his hand and he pulls away. “No, I’m really upset. I’m going to drop you at home and leave.” His tone is final. He refuses to look at you on the speedy ride home. You get out of the car and Timo roars off behind you before you’ve even gotten into the front door.
It’s agony being at home without him. You have no idea where he is. Your heart aches for what happened this morning. You feel so awful about what you did last night too. Why didn’t you tell him to slow down? Why didn’t you show him what you needed instead of pretending everything was fine? Why didn’t you remember the mic they put on you literally two minutes before that happened?
The sun has set when the garage door begins to open. You set your glass of wine on the end table and turn to look over the couch at the door. Timo comes in with take out bags for dinner and a bouquet of flowers. You hide your face in the couch cushion, feeling completely unworthy of whatever romantic display he is about to do. He puts a hand on your hair, tugging your pony tail for you to look at him.
“I was really embarrassed earlier and I didn’t know how to communicate with you about why.” You rest your chin on the back of the couch while he kneels down to be eye level with you. His thumb strokes your cheek while the rest of his fingers caress your neck. “I missed you and thought I showed you how much last night. That’s why it was so upsetting. I can take the heat from the guys. Whatever. But not giving you that experience feels awful.” 
“I’m sorry. I should have told you, but you were so eager. And it was hot. I loved so much of that but I was also half asleep when you came in and…” You close your eyes, having a hard time seeing his forehead crinkle in worry. “It wasn’t enough.” You finish, not having any other words to describe it. He nods. 
“That is fair.” He leans forward to share a tender kiss with you. “Let’s make a deal to not do that again.”
“Never.” You agree, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. He lifts you over the back of the couch, standing with you in his arms. Your ankles hook together at his lower back. The hug lasts for awhile, softly stroking each other’s back, leaning heads together and sharing a few more smooches. “I love you.” You say sweetly. He smiles, the corners of his eye crinkling in joy. 
“I love you too.” He murmurs. “Come see what I got us for dinner.” 
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liauditore · 7 months
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For the ship bingo, perhaps ethubs or boatboys?
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sorry it took so long to get to this i got so excited someone asked me to talk abt ethubs i went into a coma 😭😭
Ethubs
um uhh umerm ethubs yeah etho and bdubs and last life and mindcrack UHCs and eyah yknow um yeah
you know that one post that's like "inside my head is a five page essay with footnotes and when i speak it's just ouhghh blorbo he is so shaped". that's me with ethubs. not even kidding ethubs is the ship that made me finally "get" shipping in general, mcyt or not. i. words. i care them.
and uh there's. not rlly anything i can say i think that my ethubs moots haven't already said? They've been friends forever, they play off eachother super well, "he loves me", they're both so obsessed and in need of eachother but at the same time would rather eat raw, unpicked cactus than admit that, etc etc they're so unwell
im just gonna skip on over to the song lyrics bit cus i. they make my brain short circuit i cant even sentences.
The scarlet summer is gone and peaceful gray is draping the city Alone, I reach out for you to hold me tight, shivering Always the days spent with you warmed my heart and kept me from freezing Although I knew they were gone forever But in my pain, to me you came like the warmest breeze "On nights so cold I know you need some company."
Though only in lonely and freezing times, we held each other close to keep from feeling hopeless nothings And now again I can see summer fast approaching like a storm that there's no stopping Repeating in a cycle Like our mistakes
My love for you is endless, just like the deepest sea And like the ocean blue your complications speak to me I've come to understand you, your parts and inner workings My sun only in winter Only when I need you or else you won't need me
Leave you in Summer, Yet You're In My Fluffthoughts (Ashe translyrics) (sidenote this might be one of my favourite music videos of all time)
Falling so deeply while clinging to love But even so, I feel my heart and it’s floating up above Your true face, such a passionate one, shows your beauty, coming in a flood True, all of our short-lived youth will someday come to end Ah, even so, in my view, it starts right now, yet again
And every day, I found I prayed for you to be always full of happiness that remains Ah, just like this, please wait right by my side, please stay
Tablet (Will Stetson / sayriris translyrics) (after watching LL the first thing i did was make a MV to this song with LL Bdubs and it was still the most insane thing ive ever done fuelled by pure gargoyle inspiration juice)
I wouldn't say they're ~~Divorced~~ quite yet cus Idk if they were ever really married as much as just plain endlessly obsessed with eachother, which they still are. But they definitely broke up lmao
but yeah uh their chemistry is great. bdubs said it best. they've been thru the trenches together.
Boat Boys
Thankfully much less thoughts about these two or else this post would get way too long lmao. I like them but I'm not too insane about them I guess? Etho's very awkward near people he isn't used to which was fun to watch but made their interactions kind of limited for a lot of DL I feel.
Joel's obsession with Etho is hilarious and seeing Bdubs get jealous of his #1 ethogirl status getting challenged is great fun. He's definitely gone through a bit of an arc from "I KILLED ETHO! I KILLED ETHO!!" in Last Life to "Eefo D:< You're making me nervous, eefo D:<" in Double Life to whatever the cow divorce situation was in Limlife. It seems like Etho's otherworldly status has been nerfed in his head and he's much less intimidated by him, while still admiring him in that 'childhood hero' sorta way.
I think because of that I've always seen them a little bit as more of a mentor/prodigy relationship than anything else? Specifically one that Etho is not even aware he's in. Eitherway, I don't really ship them in the romantic sense 🤷‍♂️ etho's just way too aloof and joel's got too much fangirl energy for it to be anything intimate lol
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wannab-urs · 9 months
Text
The Spreadsheet Digest - Vol 12
Hi friends!!
I read a certain dark romance book this week and then also spent some time trying to catch up on all my lovely mutuals' fics (and there were many), so the rec list is only like 9 fics this week. I guess that's still a lot? It's no 27 fics though.
If you tagged me in a fic this week, I'm planning to get to those soon I promise. The actual spreadsheet with all my recs can be found here and the masterlist for my fic recs can be found here.
Anyway recs below the Pedge
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Adversity a Frankie/Ezra series by @the-ginger-hedge-witch
This combo... okay I'll just start with how unreasonably HOT this is. Like you got Ezra: protective, talkative, wild, a little feral, definitely likes to use his mouth, lean and impeccably dressed with that dumb little blond patch. Then you have Frankie: Established Canon Pussy Eating King, def talks you through it, broad shoulders and a cute belly, patchy beard you'd just die to have between your legs, broody boy. So obviously, I'm already about to pass out. And then!! Their relationship with each other makes me feel so many things. The way Ez pulls Frankie out of his fucked up head and the way Frankie settles Ezra UGH. And then!!! and then!!!!!!! The way they take care of reader and the way they all love each other and balance each other out!! The hints of the other TF boys in there is v fun also. I know this series is old, but I am dying for it to be added to. Every glimpse into this wonderful lil throuple was wonderful. <3333
i've got headaches and bad luck but they couldn't touch you - a Joel one shot by @tremendum
Brat tamer!Joel is sooooo fucking hot. This is filthy and I love it!
warmth - a Joel one shot by @grippingbeskar
ooooh i love how at first this is just a sweet lil fluffy thing and then you put *you can stop reading here if you aren't a whore. however, i am, so i will continue* LMAO. I'm obviously a whore so I obviously kept reading. This one is for my thigh riding girlies <333
the worthwhile fight - a Marcus P one shot by @swiftispunk
So glad you decided to write some sweet angel baby Marcus P!! And I love the lil twist with reader being the protective one, because.... I actually cannot see Marcus punching anyone. Like I'm sure he would if he had to, but in my head he's such a soft boy I can't. The smut, as usual, was just absolutely immaculate. Looking forward to more marcus from you maybe...???? (please)
Sparks fly - a Joel one shot by @ezrasbirdie
Ok listen... This is the second anal fic I've read in as many weeks that made me have emotions other than filth... How do y'all keep doing this to me. The story is adorable, I love it!! And then they eat each other's asses and it's hot and it's a good time. Honestly I'd still give this a shot if you're not into the idea of eating Joel Miller's ass bc there's a bunch of super cute interactions and some smut before that happens... If you're a freak tho... this is the one
Just a little taste - a Din one shot by @jksprincess10
I fucking love inexperienced!Din and I love when he tastes pussy for the first time and just goes absolutely nuts. This was so hot ugh.
Fire a Din one shot by @jksprincess10
Din Djarin Fluff Supremacy
Hungry Hearts - a Joel series by @atinylittlepain
Young Joel... in booty shorts... playing baseball??? Being a gratuitous flirt and a total asshole in the most frustratingly charming of ways?? Ok and then... he's also a MECHANIC... Slutty Joel is everything. Oh but let's not stop there! We also get girl dad Joel being the most stereotypical softball parent ever. Sarah and Ellie being so very Sarah and Ellie about the whole thing. Also like if you needed more incentive for some reason Joel gets hit in the balls while being a douchebag. I feel like I'm not selling this as well as I should be, but I don't want to give too much away. It's delightful. Read it!!
Peace - a Joel one shot by @swiftispunk
As a former John Green novel SIMP, I love the living eulogy thing. It has a special place in my heart and I refuse to apologize for that. This fic had me tearing up bc like... Joel Miller deserves to hear how good he is and how much he means to people and he doesn't really ever get that in canon. Not really. I am going to have a literal breakdown bye
----------------oldies but goodies----------------
The Appreciation of Fine Liquor - an Ezra one shot by @write-and-buried
poor baby - a Joel series by @walkintotheriveranddisappear
Just a little game - Javi P one shot @walkintotheriveranddisappear
quickie (boyfriend's dad!joel x reader) - a Joel one shot by @joelscruff
𝒉𝒐𝒍𝒅 𝒎𝒆, 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒎𝒆, 𝒕𝒐𝒖𝒄𝒉 𝒎𝒆, 𝒉𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒚 - a Dieter one shot by @psychedelic-ink
warm up - a Dieter one shot by @ezrasbirdie
Dieter Bravo x Library AU - a Dieter one shot @fuckyeahdindjarin
Bouquet, Bloom, Blossom - a Dieter series by @mypoisonedvine
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Happy Reading
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fishy-lava · 3 months
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pls I need to know about kiseki/trapped
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Since both you and @buckystilinski asked out about this one I'll answer both here lol
Ok! So! This one was actually inspired (as many good things are) by a conversation (or several) I had with @morathicain about Ai Di and Zong Yi meeting Tang Yi while in prison and their potential friendship
I can't give you a snippet as it is mostly bulletpoints rn but I can tell you a little of what I would like to have happen instead
I'm still figuring out timeline stuff but I think Zong Yi would meet Tang Yi first during the time before Ai Di joins them and would get along pretty much instantly and Zong Yi introduces Ai Di to him when he gets there and Ai Di is suspicious of him at first but eventually decides he is safe (possibly after Tang Yi protects Zong Yi during a time when they've been separated for some reason and Ai Di cant get to him)
I'd like to go through a few different scenes while they're in prison together of them taking care of/looking out for each other as well as some softer stuff of their more daily routines together (Tang Yi and Zong Yi are both up early every day as part of their lives before and Ai Di is very grumpy about having to also be up so early) and discussions of their respective loves of their lives (because you know these three have so many feelings they need to cope with also I just like thinking about Ai Di making fun of Tang Yi for dating a cop)
Once they all get out (I think I'd like to have Tang Yi get out a few months before them) Tang Yi spends his time with Shao Fei and Hong Ye while Ai Di and Zong Yi get caught up in the rest of the Kiseki plot and they don't see or hear from each other for at least a few months
When they see each other again once everything has settled down it's when Tang Yi and Shao Fei go to Zong Yi's bakery not knowing it's his and find Ai Di sitting inside talking with Chen Yi and Ze Rui as Zong Yi works and Ai Di gets super excited when he sees Tang Yi and runs to go get Zong Yi from the kitchen (meanwhile Chen Yi and Ze Rui are looking at each other like "do you know this guy?? because i sure as hell don't")
Everyone is getting introduced to each other and Tang Yi is like "Oh, this is Chen Yi?" and he and Zong Yi (and Ze Rui probably) team up to tease Ai Di about Chen Yi as payback for all the years they spent listening to his lovesick ramblings lmao
Probably not part of the whole thing but maybe as an extra bit after I like to think they all get invited to the Ze Rui/Zong Yi and Tang Yi/Shao Fei weddings (and maybe Hong Ye's wedding too but also please just imagine Hong Ye and Ai Di interacting with each other it would be so bitchy and fun)
Ok that was very rambly (I really say "and" a lot huh?) I apologize but yeah that's the plans I have for Kiseki/Trapped and I hope you guys have as much fun with it as I do <3
WIP Ask Meme
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