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mockerycrow · 11 months

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Hello!!!!!! So i was wonderinfg if you could do a piece for cod mw2? A platonic 141 (other characters can be added if youd like) x (preferably 18-20 yr old) gn or fem reader. It can be a oneshot or headcannons, i dont mind either format!!! If you do a oneshot, any scenario (a mission, off duty, etc) is fine w me!!! You basically have free reign, just keep it strictly platonic, not even a smidge of the hints w the reader and romantic relationships 👍❤️

Ain’t That A Kick In The Head? (Platonic!141 x Fem!Reader)

cod masterlist

A/N: YESS!! I LOVE PLATONIC FICS!! 99% of my writing so far has been romantic, kind of funny considering I’m aromantic and queer. thank you anon <3 i’m also sorry for taking so long. your speciality isn’t specified, but it can’t be demolitions, im sorry!! plot purposes.

[WARNINGS: mentioned misogyny, fluff.]

Considering how young you are, you deal with quite a lot of people who have low expectations for you. To be fair, you don’t have much experience, but you are a quick learner and that’s very much needed on this base. You’re a Specialist, one rank above Private in the U.S. army ranks. When people first meet you, they expect you to be a coward, a twenty year old girl—is what they like to call you—who doesn’t know the difference between a 5.56 mm cartridge and a 7.62 mm cartridge, a clueless little girl. Of course you did not know everything, but it was clear you know enough and have enough skill as you’re apart of the 141.

When you were first picked for the team, Ghost was a bit skeptical. Your age played a big factor because he was concerned about your level of experience, but he overall trusts Price’s judgement. A huge part of it was him worried about how you would take in all of the traumatizing sights they see on every mission. How you would be able to take someone down without a second thought, even if they pleaded for their life. He didn’t voice this worry, nor did he do anything to “shield” you because he knows you know what you signed up for.

You physically train/spar with Ghost and Gaz separately frequently. They are different in size and in style of defense/attack, so they both give you great pointers on how to defend yourself and how to initiate an attack. You have a schedule with them; when you’re on base, you train with Gaz Mondays and Tuesdays and Ghosts on Thursdays, preferably early in the morning with Gaz and in the evening with Ghost. Even when you perfect your own style for attack and defense, you keep training with them; “So you don’t get rusty.”

Price knows what you signed up for, and he knows that he picked you, so like everyone else on the task force, he begins to train you. Being an expert in violence and timing—unconventional warfare too, he occasionally sits in on your training sessions with Gaz and/or Ghost. Sometimes, he talks with Gaz or Ghost beforehand to set up a specific scenario for you to find a way to get out of alive.

Being said, Price takes you out as well as the team to a training field, doing the exact same thing but in a more.. realistic scenario. Being so young, he figures you still have an unacceptable type of response with “fight, flight, or freeze”. His plan is to strip away the freeze response because that’s the one that will get you killed. He also very specifically has himself and your teammates as the enemies in this field because while you’re supposed to trust your team with your life, there’s also often betrayal in the field.

Soap is a demolitions expert, as well as a sniper. He absolutely refuses to let you handle real bombs at first because he knows you didn’t specialize in demolitions like he did. After spending a few months with you, he brings out non-dangerous replicas of bombs and replicated parts to begin to show you how to take a bomb apart/defuse it, when it’s best to let it explode, or how to put one together for emergencies. He absolutely 110% makes sure you know it’s for emergencies when he isn’t there. It’s not that he thinks you’re incapable, but he can’t help but worry. Him learning about how Gaz and Price met, how Price only had seconds to shove the hostage with a bomb vest strapped to him over that railing? Fucking terrifying to him.

Gaz also helps you complete your interrogation training—not being the interrogator, but then interrogatee. Undergoing several mentally challenging tests himself of this variety, he tasks himself with giving you pointers. Your task is to keep your mouth shut about intel and escape the facility and remain hidden, uncaptured during the entire test. He’s so incredibly used to uncomfortable situations, so his pointers during this—seeing that he passed this test himself, the only one who past it in his class—his advice is helpful.

Besides training with Ghost, he coaches you ambushes and stealth. Every time you’re caught in a test, he coaches you on how to evade, on how to remain hidden even when the enemy is right in front of you. He teaches you how to set up traps and ruses, what traps are most commonly used and spotted and what ones aren’t.

Overall, they know you’re inexperienced and young, but you quickly take their advice and training into account, and you get to teach them a thing or two when you arrive on base. You learn quick and Price finally feels as if you’re ready for an intense stealth mission, accompanied by the team. They don’t have any doubt held in their hearts for you, 100% trusting your abilities.

#call of duty #call of duty mwii #mw2 2022 #cod mw2 #modern warfare ii #mw2022 #cod #cod mw ghost #ghost x reader #price x reader #soap x reader #gaz x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #john price x reader #john mactavish x reader #kyle garrick x reader #platonic #young!reader #cod headcanons

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theflagscene · 5 months

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The hand rubbing scene is the gayest sex scene GMMtv has ever had on screen, allow me to explain to you why.

Gifs by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

Now I can’t speak as someone who is completely blind (obviously) but I can speak as someone who has been progressively losing their sight for the past 15 years - ironically enough from a car accident. Why hello Day, I see you! (pun intended) But I’m also a person who grew up HoH (hard of hearing) from the age of two years old onward, I had tubes put in my ears, wore hearing aids, the whole shebang. The chances of me actually regaining my ability to hear completely was very very slim, the fact that I did actually end up regaining some - not all - of my hearing by my late twenties was a damn shock to us all. The point being, when you are a person who’s lost one of your senses that you are used to having, your body starts to overcompensate.

Most everyone has heard/read/seen things about how removing one sense can lead to your other ones becoming stronger. There’s even been studies that show people born deaf or deafened at a very young age, that their brain starts to rewire itself to allow them to experience sound in a visual way, via touch. It’s sort of like how blind people learn to read braille in a way, the touch creates a picture in your mind allowing you to see the way that word looks and sounds and feels. Theres a whole bit in Scientific America you can check out if you want that breaks it down in layman terms without the writing acting like you’re stupid, which is always nice when it comes to medical jargon lol.

So my point that to Day, his sense of touch is not only in overdrive because it like much of the rest of his senses - smell seems to be a big one they’re leading with - are scambling to try and overcompensate for the sudden lack of sight that is getting worse as time passes. But because he had pulled away from basically the entire world post blindness setting in, spending the last year of his life in his room hardly interacting with anyone, his own mother and brother barely being allowed to touch him. That for Day, his sense of touch is absolutely frantic. Which is why it’s so important for Mhok to constantly place his hands on him, not only to help lead him back into the world but to allow Day to recognize him by touch alone. And it’s being shown that he is, Day already knows Mhok’s voice and it’s touched a bit on the way he smells (ciggs) but this last episode is really starting to show how the touch of people is starting to fully affect Day, especially when he’s out of the house and how Mhok is instantly recognized even though he always follows up his touch with a vocal confirmation that it is in fact him that is touching Day.

So that hand stroking scene, the way Mhok runs the pads of his fingers gently up the centre of Day’s palm, how he strokes the back of his hand like it’s a kitten. That right there could genuinely feel like sex to Day, if not sexual in manner at the very least. The fuzzy look Day gets in his eyes, going from blank, to blissful to bashful and then finally awkward. It wasn’t just because of the fact that the dude he lowkey is starting to have a crush on is rubbing his hand in what I’m seeing being called a ‘weirdly intimate way’. It’s because Day’s body and brain is reacting to that touch in a way that people with all five senses might not completely comprehend, imagine your most intense erogenous zone (btw the palms of the hands are occasionally considered one) now imagine if that intensity was ramped up by ten, or twenty or even fifty and then imagine that that erogenous zone was suddenly everywhere. The most innocuous part of your body could bring you the most incredible sensations, both sexual and emotional, that’s what Day is feeling.

Mhok, now Mhok, he’s not stupid. Far from it in fact, he’s clued in on that not only is Day queer but also that he has a bit of a crush on him. Mhok has also quickly adapted to how he needs to teach Day to see the world in a new way, hence all the touching and smelling and reinforcement that Day can in fact do things for himself, including asking for help when he needs it. So Mhok knew exactly what he was doing with the hand rubbing, sort of. Did he know the sensation would be heightened, my best bet is totally. But did he expect to have his reaction to it go beyond that of teasing? Given his own bashfulness, doubtful. When you’re dating someone with a loss of one or many senses, you tend to change your own preconceived notions of what intimacy with your partner is. For some people offering a foot rub to their partner is a clear come on, an offer for something to lead to more. But for a blind person, especially a newly blind person like Day. They use their hands to navigate their entire world - you literally read with your fingers - so a blind persons hands are basically their most important tools in a lot of ways. To have someone touch your hands with such care, such reverence, it’s not just intimate, it’s full on foreplay.

Mhok wasn’t just touching Day, he was touching Day. It was meant to be seen as intimate because it was intimate, so intimate, in a way I don’t think either Mhok nor Day were expecting it to be because neither had ever experienced something like that before. That scene was truly the beginning of their relationship shifting, that hand scene was kind of like their first kiss.

Gifs by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

#last twilight the series #mhokday #morkday #jimmysea #nontraditional intimacy #for real tho #JimmySea played that scene so freaking well #this entire show makes me happy #to have some sort of queer representation that I connect with so well #like Day I totally get you bb #also sorry for yanking your gifs Wanderlust #hope you don’t mind :)

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sunandmhoon · 9 months

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Your lips my lips...

Genre: Comfort/Fluff/Mild-angst Pairing: Ni-Ki X Reader Summary: “You know what else I regret?” he finally spoke up. His eyes darting quickly to the countdown. 1 minute, It was now or never, he thought. w/c: 1473 MASTERLIST; OTHER WORKS A/N: hehe second story of the day!! I hope you like it ^^ -mari

In another world you would be happy. Maybe in that world you would be stood amongst the crowd in the Big Apple, adorning warm clothes, a scarf wrapped carefully around your neck–courtesy of your boyfriend, who just can’t help but bundle you up. Maybe in that world the count down would be for a new year. A new hopeful year full of new experiences, new beginnings, new worlds.

But you don’t live in that world.

In fact, the world you’re living in currently may not even be a world anymore after five minutes. The clothes that you’re adorning were not soft, nor comfortable. They were rough and heavy, but you had to wear them to survive. The scarf around your neck, covering your mouth was replaced with a mask to keep the smoke out. The countdown on the big building was not counting down to a new year, a new hope, a new beginning. It was counting down to an end.

In all your seventeen years on this earth, you never had a boyfriend. You never had the time to confess your love to the one you wanted, the one you trusted, your soulmate; Riki. Every moment spent felt like a race against time, cautiously hiding from any predators, always sleeping with one eye open.

Maybe the end of the world was more of a blessing than a curse. At least you won't be dealing with life like that right? It just all seemed unfair.

04:00 [1 minute down]

“What are you thinking about?” a voice interrupts your inner monologue. His eyes looked worried. It makes sense though, you thought, the world is ending.

“What is there to think about,” you laughed dryly. It was true, nothing can change in only five minutes. “We’re all gonna die. I think I’m just accepting it.” your eyes not moving from the countdown.

“That’s kind of depressing,” he chuckled lightly. That always amazed you about him, the way he made any situation brighter by simply being there. “I guess it’s true,” he adds, “But do you ever think that maybe, even if it's such a small chance, that maybe something or someone will save us?”

The hopeful tone in his voice almost made you believe him. But you’re past that. Believing.

“Nah, I don’t think so,” you shook your head, “that would be a miracle, and I don’t believe in those anymore.”

“Why not?” Oh Riki and your curious mind.

“Because,” you start, “Look at the situation we’re in right now. Even if the miracle happened, it won’t change the world.” you sighed. “Say, we got more time on this earth, we would still suffer either way.”

“I guess you’re right,” he nods. A part of your heart breaks at the sound of his voice losing its brightness, “I just wish I could have more time to do the things I’ve always wanted to do.”

03:45

“What are your regrets?” you asked, focusing your attention on him this time. You only had 3 minutes left on this earth so why not spend those last times admiring what could have been?

His jet black hair, overgrown and framing his face. Stray bangs are always moving untamed despite how many times he combs his hair back. The moles on his face, decorating it as if little chocolate chips on a cookie. His eyes, sharp and intimidating yet somehow always full of love and care. His lips….

“Well, that’s a loaded question,” this time he’s the one looking at the countdown. “Well, I wish I spent more time with my parents, maybe my siblings too. I wish I wasn’t such a bitch, you know,” he laughs. He looked at you, eyes focusing on yours. In his pupils, the image of regret, heartbreak and desperation.

“What else?”

“I also regret not being brave enough.” his eyes never left yours. Scanning and taking in your face as if he was carving it in his mind. “I regret being a coward. Not speaking up when I wanted to.”

“You’re not a coward, Riki,” you smiled softly, “you’re one of the bravest souls I’ve ever met. Look, we’re alive right now because of you.” you reached out for his hand. His soft, comforting hand. The hand that had held you on cold nights, fed you when you were sick, lifted you up when you fell, wiped your tears, tended to your injuries. His hand.

“No Y/N, I was a coward.” his eyebrows creased, guilt seeping through his veins, “you always stood up for me at school everytime someone said anything bad about me. Yet I never had the balls to stand up to those who talk shit about you.” his eyes looked so guilty and angry that you feared he was nearing tears, “I was so selfish that I put my popularity over you–my Best friend. And where’s that popularity now? In the fucking trash.”

“Hey,” you took your free hand and cradled his face, “We’re just kids, what did we know, hm?” you graced a small smile on your face in hopes that it would calm him down. “Sure, there’s so many things we could’ve done but, it’s all in the past now. What we can at least do is to think about all the good times.”

Your words left a silence in the air, a silence filled with silent wishes, longing looks, sad smiles. He had put his hand over where yours were on his face. He squeezed it three times, looking at your eyes, then your lips, then your eyes again.

You felt flustered under his strong gaze.

01:00

“You know what else I regret?” he finally spoke up. His eyes darting quickly to the countdown. 1 minute, It was now or never, he thought.

“Hm?”

“I was such a coward, I know I already said that,” he starts, “But It’s something I regret so deeply because it stopped me from telling the truth. Telling the people I love my true feelings. My mum, My dad, My sisters…” he took a deep breath. “You.”

Time stopped for you. The countdown was slowly ticking but for you it wasn't moving at all, the only thing in your mind right now was Riki, You and his words.

“Huh?”

“Yeah,” he squeezed your hand softly again, bringing it down from his face to his lap. Playing with your fingers, afraid of your eyes. “I feel so bad for telling you now, I’m sorry if its bothering you, but I can’t handle keeping it to myself anymore.”

“Riki…”

“It’s okay if you reject me,” he laughed dryly, “It’s not like anything will happen anyway. I just wanted to let you know.” his fingers worked softly against your hand as if it was a piece of glass. “I’ve loved you for the longest time. Everything you did, I always admired from the way you smile and even on your worst days. I don’t know how to sound poetic or deep around you because you make my mind go crazy, Y/N. It’s frustrating the way you make me feel, you know,” he smiled.

“Riki..” you took your hand from his fingers. This made him freeze. Had he crossed a line? Did you not like him back? His heart was already shattering in his chest when your fingers feathered his chin and lifted it up.

“I like you too,” you smiled, “for the longest time too.”

“We have such bad timing don’t we?” he smiled, the biggest grin you have ever seen. In the dark skies of the ending world, his eyes were the brightest thing to ever grace the planet. “We could have been a couple for all our life!” he whined playfully, hiding his face against your neck. “We could’ve,” you laughed back, “but let’s not waste our last time here, hm?” you took his head in your hands, bringing down his mask as he did yours.

“You’re so cute,” he pinched your cheek. You giggled as if the world was not ending. Because in your eyes, your world just started. It didn't matter that you were dying in a matter of seconds because at least you get to end it happily, in the arms of the one you love.

“Can i?” he looked at your lips, love flooding his eyes.

“Of course.”

10 9 8 7 6 5

In the other world, there would be fireworks as you kissed him. The clock would strike 12 and a new world would begin. In this world though, you don’t see anything but a bright light. Eyes closed, drunk in the feeling of his lips on yours. Lost in the feeling of his arms around you. The world may have just ended with you both with it.

You don't care though, you’re already in heaven in his arms.

3 2 1

boom.

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racinggirl · 2 years

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breaking deals || charles leclerc 16 (part 1)

type: two shot (part 1) - click here to read part 2 pairing: charles leclerc x reader word count: 2.3k summary: being friends with benefits with a driver on another team has its ups and downs... requested: yes! “can you please write a fic where y/n is a driver, she's friends with benefits with charles, but when he confess his love she leaves. later on, she decides to give them a chance and the end is super fluff? please show her being super cute with him and breaking the news about their relationship on the paddock!” (by anon) Requests are OPEN!!! warnings: swearing (just a little), (mentions of) flirting, brief mentions of s*x, heartbreak (don't worry! part two will have the happy ending!) notes: I am baaaaack! I was dealing with another writersblock, but I'm back again. I've also decided to do two parts of this story, because this ending was just in my head like a movie and I HAD to do it. Hopefully part 2 will be up somewhere this or next week!

my masterlist

Rule number one when you decide to be friends with benefits with someone: no feelings. Number two, nobody could find out. The main reason for the second rule was the fact the both of you were drivers, Formula One drivers. Him at Ferrari, you at Alpha Tauri.

You had camera’s following your every step, being the first woman in this modern era to have a seat at one of the teams in the Formula One world. You worked your ass off, and people knew. You made sure people knew, because you were proud of your achievements.

He, however, was also a big thing in the media, especially after his wins, but now because of the lack of wins. Charles Leclerc, driver for Scuderia Ferrari, a championship contender in these first few races, a second place or third place contender later on.

The moment he saw your face on his phone, his Instagram feed filled with pictures of you, he was speechless. Two things crossed his mind. The first being the breath that he missed, because you were, according to the Monegasque, breath takingly beautiful. The second thing was shock, not thinking a female would be in Formula One this soon.

‘BREAKING: Y/n Y/l/n to race for Alpha Tauri in 2022’

He was happy, because this would mean things would get spicy, exciting and different in and around the paddock, on and off the track. He couldn’t wait till those Barcelona testing days, the days he would see you in person, the days he would introduce himself, and make friends, because who didn’t want to befriend the only female driver in Formula One.

The day you arrived at the track, peoples faces turned around instantly. Pierre was talking to Charles and Carlos, talking about their winter break, and of course your name entered the conversation pretty fast.

‘’Yeah, she’s amazing, and freaking fast!’’ Pierre exclaimed, explaining how the two of you met to the Ferrari drivers. ‘’I’m curious to see how she performs between the guys.’’ He then adds, his head turning around once your voice joined their conversation.

‘’I’ll beat all of you in the first laps.’’ You joked, hand resting on the Frenchman’s shoulder, your hair moving with the wind, the sun doing your tan good justice. ‘’y/n!’’ Pierre smiled, turning around to wrap his arms around you, hugging you as your arms found their way around his shoulders. ‘’Hey Pedro.’’ You replied, receiving chuckles from both Ferrari drivers.

‘’Hey, I’m y/n.’’

Those few days in Barcelona were an experience, one of the best you’ve had so far. The speed of the cars, the track, the different weather updates, mid practice changes, pitstops, all things you had at W-series as well, but 10 times faster here. You loved it, the adrenaline it gave you, all the interviewers wanting to talk to you, the thousand of followers you gained, it made you confident.

The final day of practice, you were packing your suitcase in your hotel room, music blasting through your air pods as you danced along the music. You didn’t hear the knocks on the hotel room door, or the voice that was calling your name. Once you finished packing you decided it was a good idea to go downstairs to grab some breakfast, seeing the fact you had an early practice session today. Pierre had the afternoon session.

However, the moment you opened your door, you let out a soft scream, eyes widening a little as your hand rose to your ears to take out your air pods. Once you took them out, your other hand went to your chest, deep breaths trying to calm you down as you watch the Ferrari driver laugh in front of you.

‘’Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.’’ He chuckled, his hand resting on your upper arm. You slowly looked up into his eyes, a kind smile on your face as you shook your head. ‘’No, it’s fine, I just didn’t expect someone to be in front of my door at… 7 am.’’ You smiled, fixing your hair.

Truth be told, you found him attractive, who didn’t find Charles Leclerc attractive? Exactly. Being the only female driver meant you for sure got a lot of male attention, which you didn’t mind. But it also meant getting quite some attention from this man in front of you, something you didn’t seem to mind at all.

‘’Yeah, I eh, was wondering if you wanted to get breakfast together, you have the morning session too right?’’ He smiled at you, his tongue sliding over his lips which made your heart beat a little faster.

‘’I do, are you stalking me already Leclerc?’’ You teased, closing the door behind you as you walked towards the stairs, turning your head to watch the guy dressed in full black chuckle, before he made his way towards you.

‘’Nah, I’m just well aware of who I’m on track with every session.’’ He replied, a smirk on his lips as he watched you walk down the stairs. He couldn’t lie, there was a massive attraction to you from his side, and somehow Charles hoped it didn’t stay at just friends.

And it didn’t. Ever since that moment in Barcelona, the two of you flirted, not wanting to be in trouble, so you decided to do it secretly, making sure nobody knew about the activities the two of you were up to. The both of you knew it couldn’t be a relationship, seeing the fact you were both drivers, for different teams.

However, you mutually agreed it wouldn’t get that far. It was simply flirty, joking, teasing each other. Innocent, at first.

But everything changed after you were back at the track where it all started. Barcelona, the Spanish GP. Charles was frustrated after the race, in which he suffered a loss of power, after leading with a 13 second advantage. You knew he was frustrated, so you decided to see him in the hotel later that evening, hoping everybody would already be asleep.

You gently lifted your hand to knock on his door, a sigh escaping your lips when you saw the Monegasque open the door. ‘’Hey.’’ ‘’hey..’’

You entered, feet moving to the couch almost instantly as you sat down, eyes meeting his as he leaned against the door. ‘’Shit race.’’ You replied, a weak smile on your lips. ‘’You could say that.’’ He mumbled, hands in the pockets of his joggers as he walked towards you, taking a seat on your left.

‘’Power issues?’’ You asked, and he simply nodded, his gaze being at the floor, tongue moving over his lips again. Fuck. You swallowed thickly, looking down at the floor as well, until his hand grabbed yours. Your eyes shot up, looking directly into his as he leaned in to tuck some hair behind your ear.

‘’This is making it a little better though.’’ He whispered, your faces being inches apart, his warm breath hitting your nose which made you shiver, in a good way. ‘’Me being here, or everybody else being asleep?’’ You replied, eyes closing as he leaned down, his lips brushing your neck slightly. ‘’Both.’’

That was the start of something, a ritual, a deal. A deal the both of you had to stick to, desperately.

That day in Barcelona was the start of more bad luck on Charles’ side. More DNF’s, less podiums, less wins. Sure, there was a part of you that felt bad for him, because he didn’t deserve this, he worked his ass off every time, and got stabbed in the back by either the strategists, or the car itself.

‘’I fucking can’t believe this!’’ Charles walked inside your hotel room, almost instantly, as soon as you opened the door for him. Hungary 2022, a frustration for the Ferrari driver.

‘’Charles.’’ You followed him, grabbing his hands as you notice his temper, his anger, not towards you, but himself and his team.

‘’Why the fuck did they put me on the hard compound? Just, why? They saw how bad it was performing with the other teams, did your team put you on the hards?’’ He asked, looking at how you shook your head. ‘’No, of course not, of course they didn’t because they have actual brains, unlike the guys on my team, fucking hell.’’

You frowned, leaning up to press your lips against his, pulling him down by his neck. Sure, his strategists didn’t do the best job, and you understood his frustration, but there were two stories here. ‘’They are trying their best.’’ You sighed against his lips, feeling his grip tighten on your ass.

‘’They should try harder.’’ He groaned, walking back till you were feeling the wall against your back. His hand slowly grabbed your leg, lifting it up so he could press his body against yours, your leg wrapping around his waist.

‘’And so should you.’’ You sighed, which made him stop his movements, lips separating as he took a step back, looking at you. ‘’I am.’’

‘’I know, Charles, I know.’’ You sighed, smiling weakly. ‘’But there are two parts of the strategic decisions during a race.’’ You explained. ‘’Open your mouth, tell them, talk to them.’’ You said, squeezing his hands. ‘’You’re the driver, you know what feels good, tell them, make the decisions too.’’ You nodded, cupping his cheeks with your hands, forcing him to look at you.

‘’Helping the competition now huh?’’ He asked, a playful smirk on his face. He knew you were right, and that’s what made you special to him. Instead of agreeing with him, telling him he was right and that he tried everything he could, you told him what he didn’t do right. You weren’t just going to say yes to everything he said, but you were also able to get into a discussion with him, tell him the facts, how things were actually going. And he appreciated that, he loved that.

‘’Just giving some tips to a friend.’’ You said before closing the space between the two of you again, because that’s what you were, friends. Simply friends, that’s it. And he hated that, because secretly, he wanted to be more than just that, than just friends.

He wanted to tell you, so bad, but he knew it would mean he broke your deal, the deal you made back in Barcelona, rule number one.

‘’What’s the matter with you?’’ You asked the driver, the guy that was laying next to you in bed, refusing to leave after the passionate sex the two of you just had. Charles was cuddly, not like he usually was, he didn’t leave immediately after, but he stayed, and somehow you liked that.

‘’Nothing.’’ He replied. ‘’Are you sure?’’ You frowned, turning to your side, hand resting under your chin as you put your hair over one shoulder, eyes narrowing to meet his. ‘’There’s something.’’ You murmured, poking his cheek with your finger, watching as he took a deep breath, tongue sliding over his lips like he usually did.

‘’You don’t want to know.’’ He sighed, not wanting to look you in the eyes. Your frown got deeper as you turned in the bed, sitting up straight, the covers up to your chest as you turned to him fully. ‘’Actually, I do.’’ You said, watching the Monegasque take the same position as you, face turning around to face you. His hand moved up to cup your cheek, both your eyes closing as your lips connected once more, but this kiss was different, and you both knew.

‘’Charles…’’ You sighed against his lips, receiving a groan back, his hands pulling you even closer, because he needed you close, and not just as a friend.

‘’Charles, we can’t.’’ You said, pulling away from the loving kiss you just shared. Charles looked at you, his hand slowly reaching for yours, but you pulled yours away. ‘’No.’’ You said, a frown on your forehead.

‘’But, I like you, fuck, I love you, y/n.’’ He said, which made you close your eyes. ‘’No you don’t.’’ You simply replied, your voice almost being a whisper. ‘’I do.’’ He responded, trying to reach for your hand again, but you got out of the bed and threw him his clothes after putting on one of your shirts and panties.

‘’You should go.’’ You said, swallowing thickly. It was the end of the season, but you were still known as drivers, from different teams. ‘’y/n…’’

‘’Go, Charles, now.’’ You said, looking up into his eyes, fighting the tears in your own eyes, arms wrapped around your body. He knew he fucked up, big time, so he was quick in putting on his clothes, as well as his shoes and he stormed off, opening the door and walking out of your hotel room.

He crossed your friend, the one you were here with for the final race of the season, but Charles was so in his own mind space, he simply walked past the girl, and stormed off. Lola walked towards you, since Charles left your room door wide open, and watched the guy walk down the stairs.

‘’Who was that?’’ She asked, turning her head to look into your direction. You sighed, your eyes never leaving the back of the guy that slowly found its way into your heart. ‘’A friend.’’ You mumbled, Lola walking past you to go inside the hotel room, placing the boxes of pizza on the table.

‘’A friend I fell in love with…’’ You whispered, grabbing the handle of the door and closing it behind you, eyes scanning the room, ending on the bed you just shared with that friend.

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afraidparade · 2 years

Note

Fluff is great and all but I wanted to make a request for some Lufa hurt/comfort. No pressure the ofc.

i hope you will accept some in the form of writing 🙏

(faust gets injured, luka's the one who's hurting. BIG juicy faust lore in this one)

"High Pain Tolerance"

Word count: 3650

Content warnings: physical injury, scars, trauma, mentions of abuse, mentions of death

_____________

“Yup. That’s dislocated.”

Luka’s face froze in expressionlessness. He tended to be a rather stone-faced individual, but there were notable dissimilarities between his usual calm and whatever it was that he felt in that moment. Namely the way his lips parted slightly (despite the fact that he wasn’t breathing), and the pale, sickly complexion his skin took on when he realized what he’d done.

It had happened before — neither of them were particularly clumsy, it was just a risk that came with cohabitating alongside someone of a vastly different size — where Luka hadn’t been paying attention and accidentally knocked Faust off the surface of his desk with a casual, careless movement. He’d love to say that his protective instincts frequently sprung him into action, that he could flawlessly and heroically catch the falling demon in his palm whenever he was in danger, but truthfully, his reflexes weren’t all that fast. The only thing he could do was hiss out a curse and keep himself from toppling out of his own chair while he assessed the state of his roommate.

To Faust’s credit, Luka had noticed on numerous occasions just how sturdy he was for his size. The handful of times he’d fallen before, he ended up a little disoriented and sore, sure, but aside from him barking at the human for being so oafishly careless, the tumble didn’t seem to result in much else. So Luka wasn’t sure what was different about this time. Maybe the angle at which he hit the ground? Or perhaps he’d blindly shoved the little imp with more force than he realized? Either way, Faust’s shoulder was clearly swollen and quickly turning a dark reddish hue.

“How—“ Luka had to pause and close his mouth and swallow, since his throat had gone bone dry, “How do you know it’s not broken?” His mind began to race at the possibility. What would he even do if it was broken? It’s not like he could check a three-inch demon into a hospital, and Google could only help with so much.

Faust stared at the joint for a few seconds in thought, tapped it lightly, then winced as he attempted to move it. “It’s just not,” he concluded, his eyes flicking back upwards to meet Luka’s. Upon seeing that his companion didn’t seem fully satisfied with that answer, he huffed a sigh and added, “Look, let’s just say I have a lot of experience with this. It’s just dislocated, trust me.”

Just dislocated. Just dislocated. As if that diffused the situation entirely! As far as Luka could tell, this was the worst injury he’d been witness to in their time together. And he caused it. It was sinking in now. Slowly, more noticeable signs of distress became evident on Luka’s features. His brows furrowed and his eyes began to widen, and while he’d managed to resume breathing, all of his inhales were shallow.

“W-what do we do? How do we treat it?” he asked in a trembling voice. For every bit as panicked as Luka seemed, though, Faust seemed wholly unbothered. Mildly annoyed, if anything.

“What do you think, genius? We just pop it back into place. It’s a pain in the ass to do it myself, but luckily you’re here to help me out. Just don’t be too rough with it, or it’ll actually end up broken.”

No way. The thought alone nearly made Luka black out.

“I can’t do that!” Luka quickly rejected, his voice cracking with anxiety. Faust actually seemed surprised by this sudden outburst, as if his request had been as inconsequential as fetching a bandage to put over a tiny scrape. The demon had experienced Luka’s nonchalant whims plenty of times in the past, so maybe that bewilderment was justified. But this was just something Luka couldn’t do. “I’m– I’m too big, and I don’t know what I’m doing. I can’t risk hurting you.”

Faust scoffed. “A little late for that, don’t you think?”

Luka felt nauseous. He knew it was meant as a playful jab, but it made the reality all too clear in his mind. He hurt Faust. This happened because of him. Faust acknowledged that. He said it out loud. He blamed him. Was that it? Had he destroyed nearly a year’s worth of trust? Would Faust forgive him? Would Faust leave him?

“Alright, whatever. You’re clearly too much of a wimp for this sort of thing, so I’ll just…” the imp’s voice trailed off as he straightened his back and brought his good hand to the wrist of his limp arm, then bit down on his lip with disquieting anticipation.

Luka’s blood went cold. But once again, his reflexes were far too slow. “Wai—“

Faust yanked the arm up and pushed back, then with a strained yelp and sickening pop, he stumbled forward a bit before dropping to his knees. “Fuck!” he hissed, gripping the wound that was now stained with an even angrier red. He took a moment to catch his breath, wincing every now and then as he tested the limits of how much he could move his arm in its current state. All in all, it was a marked improvement from how it had been a moment ago, but would certainly take several weeks to heal fully. Once he settled down again, Faust appeared no different than his usual, crabby self. “Shit, that hurt more than I was expecting. But maybe if a certain someone hadn’t thrown a fucking crybaby tantrum, I’d—“

Upon looking back up, Faust nearly bit his tongue from how quickly he forced his mouth shut. He knew Luka could get moody every now and then, but even still, the amount of times he’d actually seen the man cry could be counted with just one hand. Evidently, he could now add another finger to that count.

It started with a sniffle, a sharp intake of air as his body instinctively attempted to suppress the phenomenon, then when his eyelids quivered and his vision had gone completely blurry, he overflowed. Tears began to fall freely as strained sobs escaped the back of his throat, each one doubling in intensity from the last. His hands wavered and his fingers curled spastically, trapped between the decision of reaching for Faust, wiping his own face, or curling into tight fists on his lap. He stayed there, wobbling and weeping, unable to bring himself to do much else. This messy, desperate, speechless, fragile Luka was unlike anything Faust had experienced before. And the sight of his adoring caretaker shaking from his own bawling — the sheer helplessness he felt in that moment — wrenched something in Faust’s chest that hurt far worse than his shoulder.

“Wh– why are you crying?” the demon stammered, clueless as to how he should even begin to diffuse the situation, “I’m the one who—“

“I know!” Luka choked in a tone Faust had never heard before. He almost sounded…angry. But somehow, that bitterness didn’t feel as though it was directed towards him at all. Luka took in a shaky breath, forcefully quieting his tone. “I know you’re the one who got hurt. But I’m the one who hurt you. And- and even when I had a chance to make up for it, I couldn’t help you, I just…”

“Luka, for fuck’s sake, I was kidding! I’m not upset over a stupid accident, so calm down,” Faust tried. He didn’t exactly have experience in comforting others, but from the few times his human companion seemed to be in need of a reality check, remaining objective and sticking to his normal, crass self usually worked the best. He hoped the same would hold true this time, because truth be told, he didn’t have a Plan B. “Look, I’ve dealt with a lot worse, so I have a high pain tolerance. I already told you I’m used to this sort of thing, right? So—“

“But you shouldn’t HAVE to be!”

There was a heavy silence after that. Faust didn’t have a response. Truly, he had no idea what to think, let alone say. Sometimes the disparity between the two’s upbringings became all too great. And sometimes it slipped Faust’s mind that Luka didn’t even know the half of what he’d seen in his homeworld. Or what he’d done. As the arrhythmic hiccuping attempted to subside itself, the smaller man could only turn his gaze to the floor and realize he’d dug this grave all on his own. He felt utterly useless.

To say that Luka calmed down would be a severe overstatement, but at the very least, he managed to get his breathing under control. His eyes were still glassy, bloodshot, and sullen, while his gaze remained unfocused. It took a long time for him to come back from whatever daze he’d become lost in, but when he did, his voice was hoarse and painfully, heartbreakingly small.

“I’ve seen you cry over some really stupid things, Faust. But you never cry for yourself.”

Faust clenched his teeth. “So what?”

“It’s hard to watch, that’s what,” Luka replied, some of the agitation from earlier returning to his tone, “Why do you treat yourself as if you’re something expendable?”

The small, black claws of his good hand pressed so deep into his palm that Faust wouldn’t be shocked if he ended up breaking the skin there. But his voice stayed uncharacteristically level, almost resembling a convict under interrogation. “It’s what I was taught,” he answered simply.

“Then you should be mad to the point of tears about that, too.”

This time, there was no response. Sensing that the other had run out of manufactured responses for now, Luka took in a deep breath and continued, “Look, I’m not going to pretend I know what you’ve been through. And I’m not going to ask you about it, either. But I do know there’s something keeping you trapped in the past, and it’s doing something horrible to your mind. And not being able to…to help you, it’s such a scary feeling. I guess what happened just now was a result of not being able to handle that feeling anymore.”

Faust felt both a searing hotness and a hollow emptiness at his core. Was he supposed to apologize? He didn’t know what he’d be saying sorry for, so was there any point? And what did Luka know about fear? Real fear? That was about the only emotion Faust reserved for himself. So why did Luka bother wasting his own fear on such a pathetic cause? What a stupid, naive, all-too-human endeavor.

“I know I’m speaking out of turn here, and I’m sorry about that. I went and made your getting hurt all about me. I’m pretty lame, huh?” At this, the faintest smile pushed past the wet streaks on his face. “Though if you’d allow it, I’d like to make one more selfish request. Do you think you could put a little more trust in me, even if it’s just a fraction? I know I’m not perfect, and I know I’m the stupid idiot that pushed you off the desk in the first place, but until you finally get sick and tired enough to leave, you’re sort of stuck with me. And for as long as it’s the two of us, I want you to feel like it’s just that: the two of us. You’re not as alone in this as you think, okay?”

Ah.

What a miserable hypocrite he was, Faust realized, thinking he wrote the book on fear and being afraid. He didn’t understand it until now, but that burning emptiness inside of him did have a name. It was a new kind of fear to him: a fear built on hope. Without realizing it, that seedling of hope that longed to be happy, to be safe, and to be with this human whom he had grown…mildly attached to, had flourished and now branched into every fiber of his being. For once, Faust felt like he actually had a future. And nothing terrified him more.

He let out a slow, steady breath. One step at a time. Not to mention that during all this, Faust’s shoulder only began to throb more and more. “…For the record, I already thought you were lame,” Faust muttered, not quite smiling, but in a tone far from hostile. “So then, can I ‘trust’ you to help me make a sling?”

———

It didn’t take too long to gather the supplies for a sling, as well as some ice to apply to the injury. Both parties used the time to collect themselves individually, and after Luka had rinsed his face off and Faust pondered the nature of the other’s request, they reconvened at the scene of the incident. The sling was simple enough to craft out of an extra scrap of thin fabric Luka kept from one of his previous sewing attempts, and although the edges were too small for the human’s fingers to work into a knot, Faust made quick work of it using his uninjured hand and his teeth. Yet another display of his frighteningly extensive experience with this sort of scenario, but this time, neither commented on it.

“Are you able to take off your shirt? It’ll make it easier to see where I should put the ice,” Luka asked as he finished bundling a small lump of crushed ice in more leftover fabric.

The smaller nodded, catching the hem with his fingertips and tugging it upwards. It took quite a bit of wriggling and finessing, but eventually the demon was successful in sliding the garment over his arm and off his body. While Faust casually tossed the shirt to the side, thinking nothing of the motion he’d performed countless times in the human’s presence, Luka’s movements faltered and his stomach tightened. Now that the other’s back was exposed, he was reminded of the countless scars that marred the flesh there. Hundreds of discolored, thin gashes that overlapped each other in straight lines — some short, as if he had just been grazed, and others long, stretching nearly the entire length of his back — that appeared to have never healed quite right. That sinking, spiraling anxiety that sent him over the edge before came back to gnaw at his insides, but Luka reminded himself that he needed to focus on Faust’s wellbeing for the present moment. Unfortunately, it seemed like he had that realization just a second too late.

“Is something wrong?” the smaller asked, looking over his shoulder to see what the hold-up was. Upon seeing Luka bat his eyes in surprise and avert his gaze as he stammered for an answer, Faust sighed and faced forward again. “You’re worried about my scars?”

Luka frowned shamefully, but after collecting himself, he moved to position the makeshift ice bag on the swollen wound. “Sorry,” he apologized softly, pressing the fabric against the bruised flesh with a light touch, “I know that’s off-limits.”

Faust flinched as the stinging cold caused the entirety of his arm to throb, but after the initial shock subsided, he remained still and allowed Luka to apply a bit more pressure. A soothing numbness soon took the pain’s place. “No, it’s…fine.”

In the silence that followed, Faust furrowed his brows. Trust, huh? Well, he was already small, injured, and virtually defenseless. What was just a bit more vulnerability?

“…You know that I was a soldier. Or, that I at least trained to be one,” he began slowly. He didn’t need to turn around to sense Luka’s quiet surprise. “I, um… Actually, maybe this isn’t the best time to—“

“No,” Luka interjected, urgent but soft, “Please. If you’re comfortable with it.”

Faust swallowed. It didn’t look like he could back out of this one, so he continued after a brief pause, “You might find this hard to believe, but even in a world that’s…well, more me-sized, I’ve always been kind of small.” There were certainly several things Luka could have said about that. But he didn’t. “I’d always been the smallest demon in my platoon, from my very first memory of enlistment to the time of my, er, departure. To tell you the truth, I don’t know why they didn’t just label me as a runt at birth and kill me then. Maybe I just barely passed the acceptable threshold, or maybe it was someone’s idea of a sick joke. I doubt I’ll ever find out.”

“Anyways, it’s not like I was a pushover just because I was a little short. I trained like hell to catch up with the rest of my platoon, but it’s like my body just had a limit I couldn’t ever push past, no matter how hard I tried. And I fucking tried,” he added with a noticeable bitterness. “Demons are all born at the same level, but once they gain more power, they become bigger and stronger. We call those ‘High Ranks.’ And for every group of ‘Low Ranks’ — that’s what I am — one High Rank acts as their commanding officer and oversees their training. That’s where K… m-my platoon leader comes in.”

Faust swallowed dryly, his posture having gone stiff and his tail coiling in a tight spiral. Luka flashed a concerned frown, then bent forward slightly and gave his companion a light nudge.

“Are you alright?” he asked, “We can stop if you want.”

Upon hearing his roommate’s voice, Faust allowed himself to breathe and release the tension that had gathered in his muscles. He reminded himself of Luka’s affirmation that he wasn’t alone anymore, and managed to reel his mind back to the present.

“No, I’m good. It’s just not the greatest memory, y’know?” the tiny imp replied with renewed determination. “So…that High Rank I mentioned, he was pretty strict on everyone, but he had a method of training that relied on the weakest link. With every regiment, we would all train with the knowledge that whoever ‘he’ determined to perform the weakest would, um…” Faust swallowed, briefly weighing his options. He was already sharing an overwhelming amount, so maybe it was best to spare certain details from this story. “...Receive punishment. Brutal punishment.”

He reached to hug himself with the only arm that could manage to do so, grazing the edges of a few scars with his fingertips. Maybe it was the memory, or maybe it was just the cold from the ice pack, but he swore he could feel them aching.

“I-it wasn’t me every time. Sometimes someone else would fall behind, and I’d be left alone for a while. But…for better or for worse, they wouldn’t last very long, if you know what I mean. I don’t know how I did. Maybe all that extra training was good for something, or maybe he just wanted to keep me alive to…”

He inhaled sharply, cutting off the thought. “So, yeah. That’s basically the long and short of it. Now you know where my scars came from.”

Luka stared forward, speechless. Honestly, he wanted to cry again, but he wouldn’t. Faust didn’t need to deal with that twice in one day. He just didn’t know what else to do. He had wanted to learn the truth so he could help, but now that he knew it, he’d never felt less sure of what to do or say. Just how horrible had things been in Faust’s world? Were they still like that? How many demons like him were experiencing the exact same trauma at that very moment? The questions and uncertainties were maddening, but with the brittle thread of knowledge that Faust had finally been willing to open up to him, Luka kept himself together.

He opened his mouth to say something, reconsidered, then closed it.

“Don’t tell me ‘I’m sorry’ or some stupid shit like that,” Faust sneered over his shoulder. His sour disposition brought the air of familiarity back to the room, which Luka welcomed readily.

“I wasn’t going to,” he replied.

“You were,” the smaller drawled, waving a hand through the air, “You’ve got that sad, dopey look on your face. I don’t wanna hear it though. None of that has anything to do with you, and pity pisses me off.”

Luka laughed through his nose. While it was frustrating to see Faust dismiss his problems before, this felt different. Not quite dismissal, as much as acknowledgment and acceptance. That was a start.

Seeing as the ice had turned into more of a slush at this point and began to make quite the mess on his desk, Luka collected the small bundle into his cupped hand and began making motions to stand up. “Alright. How about a ‘thank you’ then?”

Faust looked up, confused frustration evident on his features. “For what? Telling you my sob story? I don’t want to hear that, either.”

The brunette shook his head. “No. I had a feeling that would upset you as well, so not quite. I was thinking more along the lines of a ‘thank you for not giving up,’” he said through a smile, “Maybe you think the reason you’re still alive is due to dumb luck or some sort of cruel conspiracy, but I think it’s because of your own perseverance. You’re just too stubborn to die.”

Luka stood fully and began exiting the room to discard the ice pack and tidy the small mess he’d made in gathering materials, but paused by the doorway to add one more statement to his previous sentiment. “Every choice you made that kept you alive eventually brought you to me. I couldn’t think of anything to be more grateful for.”

Faust couldn’t do much but stare at the empty doorway, even long after Luka had left. He swiped a hand across his face, stared down at the droplets that accumulated there, and huffed a short, incredulous laugh. After all that, this was what made him cry?

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luvring · 11 months

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Hi!!! If your still taking requests can I ask abt mhin (from touchstarved) with a siren s/o?

MHIN WITH A SIREN S/O

gn!reader | ok. some gender stuff i had to work around here. since i couldn't 100% confirm if sirens affected only men or Everyone (yknow. w women Not Being Sailors) i went w the assumption Everyone is affected. "First you will come to the Sirens who enchant all who come near them" is GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME!

and tho sirens are usually half-women i still used gender neutral terms! found depictions of male sirens which disappeared around the 5th century bce so. yknow. mythology.

! a Little difficult to safely prove your problem (especially if you run with the idea that sirens die if someone survives hearing their song) to mhin unless you're capable of transforming into the usual mermaid appearance, or perhaps the half-person half-bird version, etc. in which case,, it's pretty easy to tell. lol. to be fair you point out that mhin transforming isn't exactly safe either.

^ if it's the half-bird version i think they would exhibit a Certain kind of Shock since their form is also some sort of bird creature. like okayyy twinning ?! you'd get to compare your forms and they're like ? there's some major differences between us but i see what you mean

it intrigues them about how good your voice could be, and they wonder how long they could listen or if there's some sort of work around. like would it affect them the same if They were in their monster form, and do either of you really want to test that theory

^ specifically a solution that doesn't involve others bc there Is already 2 solutions,, but neither of you are very excited by this experiment Or involving anyone else.

one big (good!) difference is the fact that you both know you aren't alone, if ykwim. like, it isn't being a siren that's important to mhin, it's that you guys can relate to each other's problems and can face them Together

there is definitely. a conversation you have about whether you enjoy being a siren or if you would try to get rid of that part of you if given the chance. how your thoughts compare to mhin's, and reassuring them that even if You didn't want a 'cure', you understand why they do and support them. or that you Would choose to be something else,, and mhin keeping that info in the back of their mind for later

anyway. on a more lighthearted note.

in general, mhin doesn't really treat you differently than they would if you weren't a siren. other than maybe making sure you aren't picked for karaoke and—depending on how often you sing while alone—making sure it's safe to come into your room, it doesn't affect day-to-day life very much!

being a siren doesn't stop any date ideas, walking around, physical affection, etc. What about a good singing voice means you can't tease them or help them clean up after a mission or trying new sweets together. LOVE WINS!

imagine if it was like,, you had to have the intent of luring someone in + you don't Die if your 'target' survives,, so you could hum or sing without someone being in danger. and Mhin knows that. but the others don't. Idk i think we should let them be a menace. support it, even. play along, if you will

^ ! if this was the case they would at least be very interested in hearing you sing while you're one-on-one. like as a siren Out of the water Not leading sailors into a rocky death,, if you're in a safe enough environment, there's really less risk of...death. and they trust you!

but seriously,, ais and vere say something irritating and mhin is shooting you a look. and you have to tell them No you will Not sing to fuck with them right now

mhin asking if there's specific songs you have to sing or if you could technically sing something dumb + silly. not because they secretly think it'd be amusing to watch someone fall under your control but solely because of curiosity /sarc

! being a siren could potentially pull off different jobs which means you can work as a Team :) no longer alone!

are you a siren with a mermaid form? if given the chance mhin would take you to...a lake...the ocean... a body of water so you can show them what you look like, and they're just. in awe. they understand how sailors would've fallen for you and others like you

Something to be said of how mhin wishes their curse was more like yours in this case (alluring, control over your power, not intrinsically horrific, etc) but Let's not think about that too much

#touchstarved game #touchstarved mhin #mhin x reader #nia + touchstarved

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ellaenchanting · 1 year

Text

50 Days of Fetishes Day 29: Amnesia Play

I initially wrote a string of angsty tweets about this topic that Twitter thankfully erased- which is good because now this post is much more about hotness and desire than pointless angst.

Amnesia as an idea is really hot to me on a few levels. There's a kinky joy of knowing someone has enough control of your thoughts that they can erase them, even temporarily. Especially since your memory makes up such a big part of your identity, being that moldable hits on nice submissive buttons. There's the intimacy/trust fall factor of giving that power to someone safe and enjoying that they'll catch you. There's the potential surprise party/magic trick experience of having someone plan something to thoughtfully amaze or surprise you. There's the convincer bit of having evidence that you were 100%, undoubtedly hypnotized and responding to someone's suggestions instead of"playing along".

In my fantasies about amnesia, it happens effortlessly - without all the big mental contortions it's always seemed to require irl. (I'm pretty bad at amnesia as a subject-it feels like I'm trying to twist into a yoga position I can't possibly hold). Fantasy amnesia feels like a bit of magic- true mind control. Fantasy topping amnesia would also feel effortless and not like a leaning tower that's about to topple because I'm secretly The Worst Hypnotist. (I've had some more success there as a hypnotist than as a subject but - it always feels wavery to me and I have a hard time trusting in others' experiences - maybe because I have such difficulties w/it as a subject. It feels hard.)

AMA- I have tons of thoughts about amnesia. Help me clarify my swirl of thoughts about it.

AMNESIA RECS:

Mine:

I recorded this file a while ago where I'm throwing a bunch of techniques at the wall. https://m.soundcloud.com/ella-enchanting/experimental-amnesia-fractionation-file

I've written a bunch of amnesia stories. Here's a hot one and a sweet one. There's a bunch of others of mine under the ROM amnesia tag.

Others:

@wellgnawed made this amazing classic Amnesia file-

@tennfan2 has a nice amnesia fantasy file here

There are so many amazing amnesia fics out there. One of the best is this consensual kinky one by @jukeboxemcsa

Finally, I've gotten a lot of invaluable amnesia techniques and advice from Hypnotic Amnesia by @theleeallure and @hypno-sandwich here

Please send me your amnesia story, scene log, or file recs. It's one of my favorite tropes and I'm always curious about more!

#50daysoffetishes #amnesia #amnesia play

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nuoc7mia · 5 months

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random update on media i’ve been consuming:

- read and finished beach lovers by emily henry, which i surprisingly rlly enjoyed! i feel like i’m slowly understanding how to read romance novels the way that i read shojo manga LOL (the ending tho made me cry a bit damnit.)

- reading cruel prince by holly black rn which i’m also enjoying !!! reminds me a bit of how old ya dystopian fiction made me feel (pos) altho i will say that the voice is a lil inconsistent imo. also didn’t realize it was enemies to lovers LOL

- read kimi no yokohao o miteita (looking at your profile) and pls 😭😭😭 SOMEONE GIVE ME MORE TRANSLATIONS PLSSSS I LOVE THIS SORT OF PLOT W MULTIPLE NARRATORS WHO ALL EXPERIENCE ONE SIDED LOVE YEAHHHHHHHHHH

- read misu misou bc of the clips of the film on tiktok and goddamn it was graphic AND made me sad :<< did not realize the creator also wrote hi score girl + i still enjoyed the story for the most part. it’s def endless suffering tho

EDIT (12.3): woah wait i forogt i never posted this since i wrote this in july LOL but i shall continue altho tbh i also don’t remember half of what i finished consuming

- cruel prince is on pause rn bc i entered another reading/life slump ;-; i have a rlly big to-read list tho that i wanna start soon (including rereading the hunger games trilogy after spoiling all of the recent movie)

- finished monster which is WILD TO ME!!!! ugh it's such a good series — truly deserve of all the flowers it has received and sm more. writing is so tight and something i'm amazed abt is how it balances mindless violence and loss with the persistence of love and the hope that life can continue on. we want to be remembered bc our lives persist thru the ppl we meet and love. the relationship between a child and parent-figure are so important for the future pf humanity (i'm blurting stuff now). it also makes me rlly wanna dive into cold war history bc ik i glazed thru a lot of it back when i was in school LMFAO

- i read transcendent kingdom for a lit class and it CHANGED MY LIFE. its depiction of addiction, trauma, and its lasting impacts are sooo poignant and

- caught up on raise no tanin ga li (ii?) and it’s a fun read :3 i like the dynamic of the main couple and the yakuza/gang setting allows them to be a lil ridiculous despite just being high schoolers LOL. also the art style is so clean + unique??? obsessed

- stl: my son’s so silly

ok that’s all i can think of now :3 will do another update and actually keep a track of everything soon xD

#moon babbles #whoopsies i thought i posted this already

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lionydoorin · 1 year

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wait wait wait wait. i gotta know more of what nancy’s side of the rockstar au relationship is like. how does she react to all the sudden attention? do people start accusing her of being a homewrecker and getting in between steve and robin?? is she treated differently at work?? anything u can think of i’ll take

hi hi hi! okay. this post might be a little long cause i've got a lot to say.. i kinda want to analyze miss wheeler for ya, if that's alright?

so, to start, a few things about rockstar rob!au nancy:

she's a rookie journalist working at the hawkins post's entertainment department;

hates her job cause she shares it w like a bunch of old dudes that have Zero respect for her (and also because she set her dreams of leaving hawkins back because of some family problems, and being at the post just reminds her of everything she couldn't accomplish);

took the job cause she wanted to make things right and make sure the article about robin didn't have a misogynistic view nor was filled with lies (that she knew, for a fact, the post would try to go for, cause their only source of income for the entertainment department is making up stories about the Two people that left hawkins and got famous aka steve and robin)

ok! with that set, let's get to ronance.

because of the tour and how close she got to robin, even before their relationship was official, nancy experienced her fair share of paparazzi and celebrity drama from the side. having their journey from the concert venue back to the tour bus delayed because the security guards had to deal with the amount of cameras waiting for robin outside, reading through a bunch of articles (the good ones and the bad ones – comments harassing robin and talking about their looks, their voice, their "relationship" with steve) and talking about the public attention with robin during their sessions. robin would mention some of her biggest struggles, and how part of the public invalidated their sexuality, identity and overall being.

and knowing that being involved with someone famous requires having your name talked about, even for a little bit, and being somewhat of a "public" person, nancy (and robin) knew they had every reason and right to try and be secretive for a while. at least until nancy felt comfortable with the idea of being a couple in public – since it's like coming out to the entire world, and having the entire world acknowledge who and what you are in a way people that aren't public don't have to experience.

so, as long as they're a secret, nancy thinks she can live her life. they kiss behind closed doors and pretend to be acquaintances, friends on the outside. only the tour production and a few close friends know about them; they don't hide their affection as long as it's not visible to the public eye. they almost got caught a few times, even, and every single time makes nancy's heart jump, fear crippling down her spine and leaving goosebumps behind. as much as the adrenaline of having to hide is enticing to them for a while, the whole thing also leaves them exhausted and frustrated with everything they wish they could do.

it takes a while for nancy to fight her demons and face her fears, but, after the tour ended and they had to go long distance for a few months, and seeing how she couldn't handle being away from robin, they decide to move in together, right? and they know they should come out as a couple if that's gonna happen cause there's no way in hell they'd sustain the secret relationship thing.

since she works for the post and they're the number one source of robin-related gossip for the entire country, nancy knows she would never have peace to date publicly as long as she's working in hell, so the whole moving in with robin is a perfect excuse to leave her job and apply for bigger newspapers in new york city. the article about robin was a big success, and lots of companies were more than interested in having her in their crew, so it wasn't hard to land a job. so, as soon as she moves, they come out as a couple, and, well, have to adapt to a few changes.

some things are the way she expected they'd be. lots of cameras, a constant feeling they're being observed, having to answer and avoid questions, everything. nancy was dating someone public, but she didn't want to become a celebrity or anything, so she had a few rules and boundaries she didn't wanna cross and robin respected that. she made a private twitter and instagram accounts as her public ones got a boom of followers with their announcement. she didn't post much on them, just the occasional pictures with robin whenever she felt like it and lots of work stuff, and nothing can get her used to the fact in ten minutes she gets more than five thousand likes on whatever she posts— and fifty thousand as soon as it involves robin.

she did become the target of some harassment, but she tries to ignore it the best way she can. robin is very supportive, and they teach her how to filter comments on posts and not get notifications for the things she didn't want to see. nancy still read some in secret, though, no matter how gut-wrenching it is; people really did call her a homewrecker for shattering their fantasies of stobin being real, or invalidated her own sexuality and her love for robin. they tried to paint her as someone who was only in for the money and fame, like she only got her job and was where she was because she was using robin as a ladder for success.

they both knew it wasn't true, but, yeah, it hurts nonetheless.

meanwhile, her new job is fairly respectful of her relationship. nancy's coworkers don't ask a lot of questions about robin, just the occasional one or two people asking if they can get autographs or if robin is joining her in office parties. they also don't use nancy as a way to get to robin, or steve, or any other celebrity they know; and nancy appreciates the way it makes her feel like she's there for her own merit, and not to be used as a pawn to get to celebrities.

but, of course, she gets the occasional calls and e-mails from the hawkins post asking if she can do them a favour and give them exclusives. interviews, earlier announcements, or actually anything nancy would be willing to spill in exchange for money. she blocks every single one of them whenever they try to reach out.

adjusting is hard, at first, but robin is always there and she's so, so thankful for it. they talk about life a lot and robin always wants to reassure she can set as many boundaries as she wants to. they don't hide how they feel from each other; robin offers to find her a therapist that has dealt with this before if she wants to, just so she can have someone other than rob themself to talk to. she tells nancy she can archive all of the posts involving her if she feels like it. always checks in to be sure it's okay to post this, or that, or if it's fine to mention her in an interview and tell certain stories if she's not bothered by it.

nancy is fully aware that being with robin comes as a challenge, but in the end, it's all worth it. there's no one else she'd rather be with :)

#sorry for the rambleeeeeeee #i cant shut up about them. i have a hard time shutting up in general but about rockstar robin? oof #impossible #i hope its not too long and like actually understandable 🤧 i feel like i went in circles for a sec #rj thank you AGAIN for giving me a space to talk abt rockstar au ronance more. im Hugging u tight 🫂#ronance #rockstar!robin au #nancy wheeler #<- gonna tag her separately since this is primarily about her #ask #el fandom birb

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series-thoughts · 9 months

Text

Breaking the Dollhouse - Chapter One

Word count: 2.5K

Summary: What would have happened if Junior survived but was taken by Tiffany from the hospital? What would that mean for both him and Nica over the next year?

Notes: Yay! This fic has a name now (Thanks to Luna). Once again, this was originally Luna's idea and we are planning this story together. This chapter was interesting to write since I tend to lean more towards writing fluff so I hope this works out since this is a lot more tense.

Tags: @losersclubisms

Overall it had been a strange month for Junior, needless to say there was a lot for him to adjust to. Tiffany was definitely eccentric, he had started off thinking that was just due to her public appearance as Jennifer Tilly but it didn't fade, not even for a second. He supposed it was down to being in that body for so long and whilst the child-like joy she seemed to experience when playing pretend definitely unnerved Junior at times, he wouldn’t complain. He would take that over his father’s obsessive control any day.

Living in Beverly Hills wasn’t quite what Junior had imagined, granted he hadn’t dared imagine much in the first place. It was only when the crushing realisation of the people he would never see again kicked in and he desperately wanted a way out of it. The house itself was great all things considered, it was more than big enough and with the exception of a couple of rooms (Junior was assuming she used to store clothes) he was allowed anywhere around the house. He would like to decorate his new room more which had proven difficult so far given the fact that Tiffany barely left the house and had told him not to leave at all. He assumed he could understand, with him being ‘dead’ and adjusting to life with a heart condition, going out in public could definitely be a risk. Still, he remained hopeful that part of his Christmas present would involve being able to redecorate his room, Tiffany seemed to enjoy any form of makeover.

Junior was trying to distract himself from the pain, Christmas was always his mother’s favourite holiday and spending the first one without her stung more than he could even begin to describe. He had been doing his best to hide the pain throughout the morning but not well enough, Tiffany worked out something was wrong during breakfast and since, had made it her mission to make the day special.

For now he was back in his room, feeling both too full from lunch and too struck with grief to move until Tiffany decided her ‘surprise’ was ready. She had insisted on presents after lunch, with the promise of an extra special surprise to supposedly add to the excitement and in all honesty, he couldn’t for the life of him think what it could be.

“Sweetface!” Tiffany’s voice pierced through the quiet, “Time for presents!”

Junior took a deep breath before heaving himself off the bed, everything was feeling like a chore today but he hoped the surprise would at least provide a good distraction. He put on his best smile before opening the door and making his way down the small flight of stairs and was met with Tiffany waiting for him in the hallway. Odd, he didn’t understand why she would need to be waiting there if everything was ready, or why she seemed almost more nervous than excited.

“There you are!” Tiffany smiled, reaching out to Junior and he got closer, “Now, as i said i’ve got a very special surprise for you and hopefully it will help you enjoy the day more.”

“What is it, mom?” The name still tasted sour in his mouth, he didn’t think it would ever stop doing so, especially today but Tiffany insisted on it. A fresh start and all.

“Well,” She began as she placed an arm around his shoulders, slowly leading him towards the living room, “It’s really more of a ‘who’ than a ‘what’. I know you’ve been feeling bored and a little lonely being in this house so I thought today would be the best day to properly introduce you to someone.”

The two of them turned the corner into the living and Junior was struck with a feeling of all consuming terror at the sight. He could feel his heartbeat rising in fear and he forced the muscles in his face to continue smiling, Breathe he told himself, for the love of everything, keep breathing. You can’t have an episode right now.

In front of him was that same woman Chucky had wanted him to kill last month, his ‘Auntie Nica’ Tiffany had called her. The one he now knew to be possessed by Chucky. The one he had last seen terrified, begging for her life as Tiffany injected her with an unknown drug. Compared to the sight in front of him now, he decided he would have much rather seen her shrieking in terror again, somehow that would have been less unsettling.

She had been left in a wheelchair facing the TV, dressed in quite possibly the ugliest pink sparkly dress he had ever seen. No doubt Tiffany's decision, her hair also seemed different to what he remembered. The Nica he had seen before whilst terrified and scruffy, looked human but now it felt more like looking at a life sized Barbie and he had never expected it to be so disturbing. If it wasn't for the occasional tear he saw roll down the woman's cheek, he honestly could have believed she was a doll, or dead.

What the hell had happened to her? She seemed empty, Tiffany had said about her taking time to deal with the part of Chucky that was inside of her. Maybe she got it out but at what cost? Had her soul gone with it?

"Nica," Tiffany’s sing-song voice interrupted his thoughts and he looked over to see Tiffany walking towards her. "Oh come on now. No need to be such a baby, there's someone I want you to meet." She continued upon seeing the woman's tears.

Junior processed the comment in just enough time to realise that was his queue and slowly made his way towards the two women.

Upon closer inspection he was met with Nica’s glassy eyes looking not entirely at him, only his general direction. Not dead he thought, just drugged out of her mind.

"Junior, I thought it was time for you to properly meet your Auntie Nica." Junior took a moment, trying to think of a way to respond to what Tiffany was showing him.

"I-is she okay?"

"Oh yes, Sweetface. She's just a little tired and well, I had to be cautious just in case Chucky got control again. Who knows what that bastard would do to me? Sometimes a girl's just got to advocate for herself, you know?"

Junior plastered on his best smile again best not give her a reason to advocate against me he thought to himself.

"Hi, uh Auntie Nica. It's nice to meet you properly." He spoke as he extended his hand for a handshake. Nica in return looked at him for a few seconds before sluggishly lowering her gaze to his outstretched hand.

"Oh no Sweetie, I'm afraid she won't be able to shake your hand, but it was a nice thought."

Junior dropped his hand in an instant and looked back at Nica in time to see a couple more tears fall from her vacant eyes. Gods, what have they done to her?

"Ooh, I've just got to get some snacks from the kitchen. Be back in a minute you two!" Tiffany announced as she rushed out of the room. Junior waited for the sound of her heels clicking on the floor to fade before trying again.

"Nica?" He asked softly as he crouched in front of her, "Hey, can you hear me?" He reached his hand towards her shoulder intending to give it a gentle shake when Nica shrunk back with as much speed as she could. In response Junior pulled his hand back as if it had been burned. "I- I'm not gonna hurt you, Nica. I promise. I want to help."

Nica looked at him again, trying her best to focus her eyes on him.

"Go." She spoke softly, her voice hoarse.

"What?"

"Go."

"No, I'm gonna help you."

"You need to go." She spoke again, her voice a little stronger now, "Sss not safe here." Her words slurred a little, no doubt due to the drugs.

Junior moved to reach out to her again when he heard the familiar clicking of heels on the floor.

"I'll find you later," he promised in a whisper, "We can work things out then."

By the time Tiffany was back in the living room Junior was sprawled out on the couch in an attempt to look as relaxed as possible.

Junior couldn't remember much else about the afternoon, Tiffany had given him things to redecorate his room, but he couldn’t bring himself to be excited about it anymore. He was entirely too focused on keeping up the act that everything was fine. Something he had hoped he would never have to do again after his dad but he felt it was a far more dangerous situation this time.

Now, Junior had gone back to lying on his bed, he knew there was no chance of sleeping so he was simply waiting for Tiffany to go to bed so he could talk to Nica. He had been told that his 'Auntie Nica' would be staying with them by a giggling Tiffany and that she had been in one of the rooms downstairs for the past month. So that was his next goal, to get down there and find out what was going on, he only hoped that whatever Tiffany had drugged her with would be wearing off a little now.

Junior looked at the clock on his bedside table and let out a sigh, absentmindedly fiddling with the knife in his hand. He had liberated it from the kitchen on the way back to his room, it didn’t seem necessary before but after that afternoon he felt he couldn't trust anything. He looked again, 11:25, Tiffany will be in bed soon.

Five minutes later, Junior deemed it safe to sneak out of his room. He clutched the knife tight in one hand as he inched the door open with the other. In that moment, he was grateful for where his room was in the house, it meant he didn’t have to sneak past Tiffany’s in order to get downstairs and he was soon face to face with the double doors and, putting entirely too much faith in Tiffany, he tried the handle. Locked. So, he went with his next plan and picked the lock with the tip of his knife. The first few attempts he was unsuccessful until he was met with the sound of a faint click and the handle moved freely.

Ugly. That was the first thought as he looked around the room, everything was a sickening shade of pink, from the walls to the curtains to the bedspread. Junior took a few hesitant steps into the room, being sure to close the doors behind him. He squinted in the darkness and slowly made his way over to Nica, she hadn’t made any move to sit up but he doubted she was asleep.

“Nica?” he called out softly, closing the distance between them as he waited for a response.

“Junior?” Her voice was clearer than it had been that afternoon.

“Yeah, it’s me. I said I would come and find you later. Do you remember?” He took a seat in the chair near the side of the bed and flicked the switch for the bedside lamp. In the gentle glow he could see the woman’s brows knit together in concentration before she spoke again.

“Yeah, I- I think I do. But it feels all muddled, I don’t know how else to explain it.” Nica was still layed down, seemingly making no attempt to move.

“Can you um, can you sit up?” Nica let out a broken chuckle.

“It’s a little difficult now. With no limbs.” Junior was confused, With no what? he thought to himself. That was when it all pieced together, the broken look on her face when he went to shake her hand, the glassy look in her eyes. The drugs hadn’t just sedated her, they must have been making her hallucinate!

He made his way closer to Nica before carefully placing his hands on her shoulders and helping her up into a sitting position. Junior was pleased to note that Nica’s eyes were looking much clearer than before, the drugs from earlier must have worn off a little.

“Nica,” he began softly, “You still have your limbs.” She looked at him with unshed tears in her eyes and shook her head slowly. “No.”

“Yes,” he gently took hold of her right hand and held it up in front of her face, “See? It’s just whatever drugs you were given that made you think that. Your limbs are still there.” A look of realisation grew on Nica’s face as she slowly flexed her fingers and let out a sob of relief.

Junior gave her some time to adjust to what she had just learnt, before his curiosity got the better of him.

"Have you been here the whole time?"

"How long is the whole time?"

"Since we first met. Well, saw each other, a little over a month."

Nica closed her eyes in an attempt to better decipher her most recent memories. "I- I think so. Time's been a bit difficult for me to follow recently." Junior gave a small nod of understanding, trying to work up the courage to continue the conversation.

"Nica…" She looked up to see Junior nervously avoiding eye contact. "I'm sorry about… what happened that night. I, uh I didn't want to-"

"I know. And I know you weren't going to kill me."

"But I killed-"

"He tried to get me to kill first, back at the mental hospital. Chucky manipulates, that's what he does. That's why he mainly targets kids, adults are more difficult to fool. So he only really targets adults to kill or in my case possess. I'm guessing Tiffany told you about that?"

Junior moved himself back ever so slightly, giving a small nod. In all honesty, that fact had slipped his mind briefly.

"She had told me you were taking time to yourself, to figure out how to stay in control." Nica scoffed and rolled her eyes at the statement, he knew it was nothing against him, just the situation.

The two ended up talking for most of the night, sharing their experiences with Chucky and how they ended up at that house. It turned out Nica had a heart condition too, although Chucky possessing her seemed to have made it less of a risk for the time being. Junior figured that was pretty lucky considering the fact that she had no shots and Tiffany didn't know about it. He had decided he had to find a way to get Nica out, as far as he was aware, he was pretty safe and frankly, had no other options being 'dead' and all. Although Nica begged to differ, she was pretty insistent that they both escape but he had managed to drop the debate for now. The sun was just starting to rise when Junior returned to his room, feeling a little more at ease and lay down to try and get a few hours of sleep before Tiffany insisted on breakfast later that morning.

#chucky #chucky 2021 #child's play #chucky syfy #junior wheeler #tiffany valentine #nica pierce #charles lee ray #chucky fanfiction #Breaking the Dollhouse

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moonjxsung · 1 month

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star i know i dmed u about this but like i cant. i cant. AAADSJDJDADJSDKJDJDDS I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY ABT THE CONCERT (ISABEL LAROSA + ARI ABDUL GODS WATCHING TOUR!!!) I WENT TO YESTERDAY

I GOT THERE AT THE VENUE AND FOR SOME REASON EEVRYTHING WAS DELAYED BY AN HOUR AND I DONT . I DONT KNOW I WAS DEVASTATED I WAS LIKE SHIT I CANT EVEN SEE THE SECOND PERSON PERFORMING (IT WAS A DUAL TOUR) AD IW AS SO SAD BUT SOMEHOW. BY SOME MIRACLE. MY DAD TEXTED ME AND WAS LIKE "IM SO TIRED PLZ COME USING THE TRAIN" HOLY SHIT. I COULD STAY AS LONG AS I WATN AS LONG AS I COULD DRIVE THE LIE EVEN FURTHER WITH MY MOM. AND THATI EXACTYL DID!!@#!@#!@# I KNOW I SHOULDNT BE SO EXCITED AND HAPPY ABOUT LYING BUT IM JUST. HAPPY I GOT THIS EXPERIENCE INT EHE FIRST PLACE. LIKE THIS WAS THE BEST POSSIBLE OUTCOME. I GET TO GO HOME BY MYSELF, I DONT GET CALLED BY MY PARENTS, I GET TO SEE (ALMOST) THE ENTIRE SHOW, I GET FRONT ROW VIEW?? LIKE IT WAS LITERALLY THE BES TPOSSIBLE OUTCOME AND I THINK PERAHPS IT WAS A REWARD FOR THE SHITTY WEEK IVE HAD THIS ENTIRE WEEK. YETSERDAY SINGLEHANDEDLY MADE UP FOR IT. I LEFT THE VENUE AROUND 11:40 PM ISH??? AND GOT HOME AROUND 1 AM LMFAO how was i not questioned at all idk. i dont wanna jinx it like what if my mom asks me today abt everything i did. but also what the fuck how was i able to get away with such a big lie WHILE keeping it for HOURS???????????? HOURS PAST THE TIME I SAID ID BE OUT?!?!? no but like i cant beleive that these people are REAL like wym iw as in the same ROOM AS THEM? IC ANT. I CANNOT! the first girl (isabel) was BEAUTIFUL like ic ouldnt stop staring at her at all she was GLOWING. the crowd was lowkey fake and dead af tho.....like live in the moment stop staring at your phones tryna get aperfect fancam of her this aint a kpop concert!!!!!!!!! you came here FOR her not a recording of her!!!!!! well i undertsad the recording part bcs i was recordin gtoo but liek NO ONE WAS JUMPING OR SINGING ALONG OTEHR THAN ME BASICALLY AD IW AS LIKE WTF?!?! i love her older music so when she performed one of my favorites (heaven) i almost cried out of joy. but the crowd wasnt evenr ecording or singing along so i hope they were at least admiring her in person bcs she truly looked heavenly. like an angel. the white spotlight was shining down on her and she looked liek she had WINGS bro. i cant believve i got to see this live. INCLUDING ONE OF HER UNRELEASED SONGS THAT IM JUST SO IMPANTIENT FOR. NOW I HAVE AN UNOFFICIAL RECORDING OF THE ENTIRE SONG FOR ME TO LISTEN TO UNTILT HE ACTUAL RELEASE! i actually like her older songs a lot and one of my faves from her next to heaven is closer but she never performed that </3 i guess it was never on the setlist and she never performed it live pensive emoji stop i said i was near the stage nad i ltierally was like i dmed u the video of one of the girls (ari) TOUCHING MY HAND .. WHAT THE FUCL. I ALMOST ORGASMED HER VOICE IS SO HOT SED HELP stop her normal speaking voice made me DIZZY. it was raspy and lowkey deep and so like. so. it was giving dominant. why was she speaking liek that thru the mic do you want me to explode in my pants . someone needs to study me and my infatuation w women that have sexy deep voices like i also am heavily obsessed with fu hua from honkai impact bcs her voice is so hot and Ugh okay lets not get into the voice kink (guess my skz bias if u couldnt already from my previous asks .) BRO SHE STARTED TAKING OFF HER TIE TOO I ALSO SENT U THAT CLIP LIKE IAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOKAJOASKOAKOAOKOkookakokoakoakokaskodaidjaddsk

while i was buying merch before i left (i had to leave before the last two songs from ari, one of them being my faves </3 bcs i didnt wanna risk it any further) i was telling the girl by the stand that i had to be discreet bcs my paretns did Nawt know i was at a concert and some girl w her mom overheard and laughed and we made small talk and her mom was like "dont even worry about sneaking out for a concert, ive done worse as a kid. im glad you were able to give yourself this experience bcs we only live once" and i was like 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 damn some validation from a mother that isn't even mine surely feels nice. ANYWAYS. i got a signed photobook from them! i really wanted a shirt w the tourdates but alas my paretns once again dont know i was at hte concert and they are also religious as fuck and im pretty sure any shirt that mentions god in a nonreligious context would get my ass beat. Im still in disbelief like how did i even get away with this i cant believe it. also im crying bcs in order to drive the "conference" image, i went dressed in a whole business formal outfit LMFAOFOOFO you kow that meme that slike "me at my wedding vs me at some other event" with that guy. yeah that was me. me at my wedding (in my pjs) vs me at the gods watching tour (in an all black blazer outfit)

anyways yeah thank you for the lil pep talk you gave me and your comments on it <3 im glad i took the risk and went and therefore i had to tell you everything about it.

SPEAKING OF CONCERTS I SAW THAT U GOT LOLLAPALOOZA TICKETS!!! CONGRATSSSSS I HOPE YOU HAVE FUN WHEN YOU GO!

- 💫

HELDPDOSKKEMFKFKEKRKJRKTT THE LAST PART OF THIS MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD W YOUR REFERENCE TO THE MEME W THE SUIT AND RHE CASUAL DRESS PLEELWKKSKXKEEO THATS SO REAL 😭😭😭😭 NO but real talk im so fucking glad you went AND that everything somehow worked out in your favor????? YOUR DAD COINCIDENTALLY GETTING TIRED HOLY FUCKKKKK I always feel bad when something happens where I can’t be 100% honest with my parents but like that lady said it’s literally worth it because it’s a once in a lifetime thing!!!! When I first bought tickets to see bts and booked my hotel and flight and everything I told my parents nothing but the bank called about the charges and they found out and I felt soooo bad but I literally regret NOTHING like concerts are such a fleeting thing and you gotta take advantage and GO when you can!!!! Holy fuck dude though I can’t believe you got that CLOSE to them??? AND GOT AN UNRELEASED SONG???? I do know Isabel from tik tok her music’s GOOOOOD (she’s always the audio in those hot ass skz edits djkekekckdkdkd) BUT I CANT BELIEVE YOU GOT TO BE SO CLOSE TO THEM also getting a signed photobook????!:!:!:!!:!:!:!.! YOU WON SOOOO GOOD BESTIE 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 IM SO GLAD YOU WENTTTT I hope you’re able to take advantage of whenever you have special opportunities and that you always get this lucky!!!! Don’t feel guilty about lying either one day these years will be mere memories and you got out of it clean so relax and celebrate bc YOU GOT TO BE SOOO CLOSE TO YOUR FAV FUCKING ARTISTS HOW COOL IS THAT……… ILY BBY MANIFESTING MORE MOMENTS LIKE THESE FOR U IN THE FUTURE 🫶💓💖💞💘🩷💕

#💫 anon #ask

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autistic-sidestep · 7 months

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uno_reverse_card.gif im cheating and using a few ideas from the meme bc i have No braincells but i DO crave that suranga lore SO--

favorite color to wear AND favorite color in general, if they're different things; favorite genre of any media AND what his favorite type of media is (music, movies, shows, etc), favorite person, AND what he thinks abt the rat king :3

k lets finally fuckign answer this

favourite colour: phthalo green! namely why it's a very core part of the argos suit. they like wearing blacks/greys/dark greens and blues, those tend to lean into the more professional/conservative look they're angling for as a mob step, but i'm sure if they weren't having to worry abt staying lowkey in civilian cover they'd love to dress up in more bright colours, jewel tones n such. as for now, most of that's reserved for when they're juno (pre-debut) and argos.

their cuckoo training's given them an aversion to opera and ballet, given those featured heavily in the functions they were meant to infiltrate as a cuckoo, sometimes as a dancer themselves. but! musicals and plays, for sure. The COSTUMES. THE EMOTIONS. tia elena probably invites sura to come with her one time and they're hooked (i want to believe wicked's in the fh verse, they'd be all over that. misunderstood outcast tarred as a villain? YEAH. post-hb it'd have even more resonance; no good deed is SO fitting cos of past-self rivalry. defying gravity, too.) then there's 70s-80s rock, esp queen (ofc the lead singer is the purrcury's namesake), sharing the same taste in music as pelayo and joes lol.

they're a classics/shakespeare nerd too, (hence why sura's puppet was named juno), and they'd especially enjoy viola's genderfuckery in twelfth night (and honestly, the mental image of argos going "it's SHAKESPEARE you HEATHEN" after quoting something from one of the tragedies at a clueless hero is too funny to pass up. they're just bringing some class to the villain scene.)

they like movies, though they do find it a little less engaging w/o the minds to read. a good few hollywood golden age, but animated ones are probably their favourite thanks to themmy. they binged a bunch of cartoon movies together, and lilo and stitch is their favourite cos of the BIG relate to lilo being a weird autistic girl and stitch being an escaped experiment that was made to be evil, but learned to love,,,,,

favorite person: pre-hb, it was a tie between ortega, tia elena (she nicknamed sura pollito, and she's the Only person sura will allow to call them that) and, as expected, themmy, in no small part due to the fact they all kept feeding sura. and he kept coming back like a stray cat lol. they made sura feel safe and loved and valued, and not just a little kid. themmy (in my hc) being openly autistic especially helped sura be less insecure about how young he came off, especially when the farmhands infantilised the regenes so much (and by extension, learning to mask and suppress his autistic traits). part of hiding his face (and lowering his voice) was so people would take him seriously, cos he was well aware how babyish he looked. it was a huge relief not to do that anymore, or at least do it less.

themmy: so what did you think?

t: are you crying?

sura, sniffling and very obviously holding back tears: no

throughout rebirth, it was just mortum, largely cos they felt like the friendships they had as sidestep, being able to relax in someone else's company, this time, in juno's body. they love nerding out with her on tech stuff, critiquing peoples' suits, and just generally having someone that Gets It about just sitting in silence hanging out (mortum reads as neurodivergent to me).

it's a tie between her and chen now, to the surprise of both sura and chen, given how much friction they used to have lol. turns out that they have a lot in common (better at bonding with animals instead of people), more so than before hb, of course. (i am also pushing my autistic chen agenda, and that was part of the friction between the two was that step was trained to understand allistic inclined people. chen operates on different rules. but also given chens scepticism about the suspiciously well-trained young vigilante thing, i'll give him a pass for that too.)

rat king opinions: SURA ADORES THE GIRLS. sorta filling the void fred did, but not quite. i like to think of them as like… a telepathic equivalent of a service dog. if sura wasn't a mob step, they'd be a lot more dependent on them for interaction, but as is, they're a reliable supportive presence that sura knows will always have its back. it's nice to have another telepath to communicate with! routinely gives them mental scritches and treats for being the best telepathic rat brains in the whole world. they deserve it!!(and an added bonus, that also involves some self-care for herself. can't disappoint/let them down. it's a win/win.)

#ramblings #oc: suranga fernando #YAY ONLY TOOK 5 MONTHS THANKS FOR WAITING VAL

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rapharoni-supreme · 2 years

Text

Andrea-Mod’s Raph-focused fics masterpost

Since I’m posting my fics here, I figured I might as well make a masterpost of all my Raph-focused fics that I’ve written (so far). Starting from the earliest:

Knitting Needles Make Good Conversation Starters

How does the so-called 'angry one' of the family become not so angry? Simple. With a few good coping mechanisms, and a lot of help and support from his family. ((Literally the first fic I ever wrote for Rise, so pls excuse any typos or out of date details/OOC-ness)).

Patience and Fangs

There are many things Splinter still has to learn when it comes to being a father to four turtle tots. But one things is for certain: He loves his sons. ALL parts of them, even the parts that may be a bit more... savage.

Happiness is a Warm Puppy

It’s always good to take a break, especially during the rough times. Breaks that involve your favorite little brother and a bunch of fun, cuddly and slightly mischievous puppies? Those are even better. ((Post s2-finale, Mikey helps Raph de-stress after the whole Shredder ordeal))

Test Subject #1-R

“Why were you trying to lift a bus anyway?” Donnie asked, his face a mix of tired and exasperated, “Do you seriously not remember last time?”

“No, I remember,” Raph replied, scowling a little, “I just thought that now that I had a little more Raph power-!”

“While the scientific part of me would like to encourage experimenting and testing, I’m fairly certain your Aura Clone-Jutsu technique wasn’t meant to be used to pick up buses for fun.” ((Post s2-finale, Raph and Donnie experiment w/ Raph’s new aura powers))

Sweet Sixteen

On the morning of Raph's birthday, he and his father share a moment, and Raph is reminded that even if birthdays don't always feel like a big deal, they can still be worth celebrating.

Snapper's Day Out

What was meant to be a relaxing day out (and a simple trip to Teddy Bear Town) for Raph ends up having a few extra twists to it. But, that doesn't necessarily make it a bad day. Far from it, actually.

A Matter of Perspective

It hadn’t exactly changed much, it was still the same old face he always had. Same old eyes and snout and snaggletoothed mouth. He had to wonder what had made these things - what had made all of him, apparently - so ‘criminal-like’ for lack of a better word.

(OR: Raph deals with the aftermath of the whole Heinous Green situations, and the not-so-great feelings that comes with it)

On The Bench

What happens when the turtle who's known for taking the big hits and being the team protector ends up being the one that others have to look out for? ((post s2 finale, Raph has to deal with suddenly being the one that people are fretting over/protective of after he gets seriously injured in battle))

Mind Over Kraang-Matter

“...I guess it makes sense,” Donnie admitted, “That you’d be worried about… that happening again. But besides the fact that the Kraang don’t have any control over you anymore, you shouldn’t be trying to restrain yourself or- or punish yourself for being controlled in the first place, Raph. We know that you’d never try to hurt us, and you know that too. The thing that did try to hurt us wasn’t you, it was a complete different-!”

“But that’s-!” Raph stopped himself. He didn’t want to snap at Donnie again, so he took another deep breath before continuing, his voice quieter now. “But that’s the problem. I know the Kraangified me wasn’t actually me and was a totally different thing, but… but I still worry that it’s still in there somewhere, waiting to come out and take over again.”

“Okay… Why do you think that it’s going to take over again?”

Raph gave a hollow laugh, keeping his eyes locked on the floor. “I mean… Come on, Don. The whole thing with the Kraang… It wasn’t the first time that someone else was able to 'take over' while I was blacked out...”

(OR: Raph copes with the mental aftermath of being Kraangified, and Donnie insists on helping him find a better way to cope.) ((Post-Movie, obvi))

Cracked Shield

“Heh, you're one to talk, big bro. Hero moves are totally your style…”

Even if they ended up not being Leo’s last words to him, Raph still had a feeling that they would haunt him for the rest of his life.

(It's easy being the one who protects, the one who saves others. It's not nearly as easy being the one who gets saved...) ((Post-Movie, obvi))

-----

So yeah! While I’ve got plenty of other fics that feature Raph, these are all the ones that are majorly focused on him and/or his relationships with other characters. And you can read these AND all my other RotTMNT fanfics on AO3, my username there is JustAndrea: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustAndrea/pseuds/JustAndrea

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #raphael tmnt #my writing #fanfiction

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give-soup-please · 2 years

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Could you please write about a reader with parental abuse history being the adopted little sister to The Narrator? Like he sees them being gaslighted and verbally abused and is just: "No, you're going to have to go through me first", "I suppose you need a real elder figure to look up to and teach you things."

(alright, this one went straight into wish fulfillment territory. And I hope I wrote the narrator as a big brother well, I don't have a lot of experience with healthy sibling dynamics)

Narrator as big brother figure to his adopted little sister reader

The narrator has been keeping a close eye on you for a while now. Ever since he broke out of his game, he’s been listlessly wandering from place to place. There are very few willing protagonists on this side of reality. Various humans occupy his attention, but never for very long. Not until he finds you.

There’s something familiar about you. The narrator doesn’t have any relatives, not as far as he knows, but he looks at your actions, the way you move through the world, and it all feels so… recognizable.

He knows what this is, it’s on the tip of his tongue. It’s the fear he gets before a reset is forced on him. It’s the feeling of total despair whenever Stanley stops responding to him. He sees in you similar shades of emotions to what he’s gone through. Yes, the situations are different, but it makes him upset to see it happen to someone else.

He watches the fear you have of your parents, the despair of going to sleep in a place that’s terrible for you. He realizes that you need help. So he begins to step in.

He doesn’t quite know why, at first. It hardly makes sense to him. He’s always tried to hold back from being invested in the lives of others, and yet, and yet…

He sees the person hiding underneath the abuse. The spirit, beginning to shatter. The heart, under the stress of cracking. The wonderful being that could be, if given a fighting chance.

He’s still just a voice for the time being, so he comes into your bedroom one night when you’ve been crying. He clears his throat, and you startle.

“W-Who’s there?” You ask, keeping your voice low. You’re too afraid that if you’re loud, your parents will come back. He adopts the same quiet tone. “I was wondering-” and here he pauses, trying to work out what to say next. He decides to start simple. “It appears to me that you could use some help. You seem as though you’re in need of-” What word does he want to use? He flicks through several in the span of a few microseconds. “-A… narrative guide.”

Well, if your mind had snapped, at least it had chosen a nice voice to begin the descent into madness.

“Yeah, alright. My name is reader.”

And so begins a very interesting dynamic.

He’s very protective, always trying to sooth you in the best way he knows how: storytelling. Even though it’s been a long time since he and Stanley last interacted, it’s part of his function naturally to talk and spin tales.

He will tell you Stanley’s story, and then- recognizing that you’ll get bored quicker than he did, researches what stories to tell you next. He’ll tell them all, grandly. Fairy Tales, fantasy, and interestingly enough, he begins to enjoy telling mythology stories as well. There’s something about slightly different versions of the same story that’s really soothing to him.

You’ll sink into bed after another grueling day with your abusers, and he’s there to sooth you with his voice and stories. You’ve fallen asleep many nights to the comforting sounds of him talking.

He begins to document everything your parents do. For some odd reason, their version of the truth and yours don’t match up. Your parents tend to insult and degrade you and then pretend that they didn’t. It’s sickening.

“No, no, no, reader. Your mother definitely said something awful a few hours ago. I won’t repeat it, because I don’t think you need to hear it twice, but I am telling you, she was cruel.”

He watches them play this disgusting game again and again, making you doubt your perception of reality. He’ll do his best to keep you grounded. Now that you’ve got a second pair of ears and eyes, life becomes a bit easier to manage.

He comforts you as best he can. “Reader, I know it’s difficult, but you’ve got to remember there’s a better life waiting for you outside this place. I can’t intervene, not directly, but I can help hold you together until you have the resources to leave.”

He celebrates every small victory you have, every inroad to health you create. He doesn’t know when it happens, but he eventually starts seeing you as a little sister.

He listens to you, whenever you need to vent or complain. You have a lot to complain about, given your current living situation. The narrator is always there to lend a sympathetic ear.

He’s always available to help when you need it, whether it’s encouragement, help with school/work projects, or motivation. The narrator’s skills at convincing people to do things are unparalleled.

The narrator inwardly seethes at your treatment. He’s watched you suffer for too long. He begins to develop a plan. One of your parents is yelling at you about something stupid. For the first time ever, he speaks up on your behalf.

“You know, your parenting skills leave much to be desired.” Both you and your parent freeze. It’s the only thing you share in common. He continues, “Honestly, I have no faith in a universe that puts people like reader in the care of a wretch like you, but luckily they have me to help guide them properly.”

The narrator’s voice curls around the room in a slightly sickening way. You’d feel much worse if the venom was directed at you. “Reader is under my protection now, so I suggest you leave before things get ugly. Well, as ugly as your heart is, at any rate.”

Your parent flees the room in terror. You’re somewhere between laughter and tears. The narrator rests his hand on your shoulder, and speaks softly. “Are you alright?” You aren’t sure.

One day, the treatment by your parent escalates. The narrator watches them storm to your room and feels a spike of fear. He quickly pools his energy together, just in case. They’re screaming in your face. You’re terrified. The narrator is filled with rage. In slow motion, he watches your parent lean back, ready to strike you. And in one visceral instant, he manifests in the physical world and blocks their hand.

“Oh, no you don’t.” He snarls. The parent gasps in surprise and fear. “Reader, do me a favor. Close your eyes.” You’re quick to obey. Even behind your eyelids, you wince at the flash of white. You wait a few seconds, then cautiously open your eyes. Your parent is gone.

“Where- did you kill them?” You ask. The narrator sighs. “Unfortunately, no. I don’t have that level of power in this world. I just teleported their body somewhere else. Seattle, the Sahara, somewhere beginning with an ‘S’.” He crouches down to where you’re sitting on the bed. “It’s alright, reader. You’re safe now.”

“But- how are we going to- I can’t live without their financial support!”

The narrator sighs. “I know. I’ve been working on a few solutions to that. It’s not perfect. The next few months are going to be very hard. Unless-” He looks at you, kindly. “I could bring them back.”

“No!” You say. “I mean- no thank you.”

The narrator doesn’t know how to feel about what he’s done. But you’re his little sister, and he couldn’t bear the thought of not protecting you when it counted the most.

#the stanley parable #tsp narrator #headcanon #answered ask #tsp #stanley parable #narrator #platonic

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