#like i Get why my site had me in tears lol. it IS kind of uninituitive | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

blacksadbbath · 1 year

Text

do you want me? do you need me?

pairing: jerry cantrell x fem! reader

summary: you thought your boyfriend was never really attracted to you, but he was actually just being respectful.

warning: body image issues at the start, lack of communication lol, angst, smut (please dni -18)

word count: no idea sorry

A/N: had to start writing again because of the lack of jerry content on this site god.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Jerry fucking Cantrell was your boyfriend.

You had met him at at the start of the year at a gig of your friend’s band. A pair of unknown beautiful blue eyes had been on yours the entire night, so curiosity took over you and you offered to get him a drink. One thing led to another and now you have been dating for four months.

Beautiful gifts and ice cream dates have been keeping your relationship busy, so much that he barely touched you in any way. For example, it took him months for you to tell him (because he never did it himself or thought about doing it) to grab your waist when you two hugged, so you couldn’t help but wonder if he really liked you as his girlfriend, or just a friend which he had a bigger connection with. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t want to kiss him for hours with your legs around his waist, but you were -almost- completely sure he wasn’t feeling the same way.

Was it your body? You had gained a few pounds since you met because of the lack of time to work out or make better meals.

Was it your skin? You got yourself on birth control two months ago and the hormones had messed with your skin giving you acne.

“Did I stop being pretty? Did my body change so much he stopped liking it? Was he ever attracted to me in the first place?” The words cut into your brain almost every time you found yourself in front of a mirror, making you every time more insecure about your relationship. You didn’t want to tell him either, because it made you kind of embarrassed, so you tried to brush it off every time you hung out.

Till you couldn’t brush it off anymore.

Every time the thoughts lingered for longer in your head, and you felt your conclusions getting more real each second that passed. You had to talk to him.

“Hi Jerry” You said through your phone, hands shaky and your feet tapping into the hard wood floor of your room.

“Hi love, I was just going to call you ” He answered calmly through the line. “I’m ten minutes away from your house, can I go?”

Fuck, the least that you wanted to do was to talk in person, but you couldn’t keep waiting or your nerves were going to explode.

“Sure” You replied softly, trying to not let the worried expression of your face take over your voice “It’ll be nice to see you”

“I know, I missed you and wanted to give you a surprise. By the way, was there any reason why you called me first?” He asked genuinely.

“Nope, just wanted to say hi. See you soon”

You hung up and tears started running down your face, you didn’t know how to talk about this. The time went slow and you didn’t know what to do, so you took a cold shower to help with the puffiness of your face and body in general. Two minutes after you got dressed and applied a bit of mascara and concealer to not look dead, you heard a knock on the door.

“Hi” Jerry gave you a small peck on the lips and went straight to say hi to your dad. You chased him down the hall to tell him your dad wasn’t home yet and you needed to talk to him about something. He hummed and went back to the living room where he sat, a little bit concerned.

“Listen, im gonna be direct because this is eating me alive” His expression went from a little bit concerned to concerned and nodded, afraid of what you were going to tell him. “Do I disgust you?”

“What?” He said extremely confused, thinking that it was almost a joke.

“Could you tell me the truth, please?” You started spitting words one after another and tears started running down your face again.

“I feel like you’re not attracted to me anymore, or maybe you never were. I want to feel like your girlfriend, not some friend you just like a lot. I have noticed that PSA isn’t your favorite, but I just know that if we asked some random on the street what our relationship is they would never guess we are a couple. I feel loved, I know you love me a lot, but I don’t feel like you do it like I want you to”

“God, im sorry, I just...” He got his concerned look back and started talking again, but you interrupted him.

“If you’re not attracted to me is completely ok, of course i understand that you could have stopped thinking im hot or anything I just...” You sobbed not wanting to look at him in the eye “I just want you to tell me the truth”

Jerry got on his knees in front of you, hugged your stomach with one arm and with the other took one of your hands in his.

“Y/n, you are the most beautiful woman I've met. I know I might look like one but im not an idiot either, if you thought I just liked you as a friend but still asked you to be my girlfriend” He looked up at you with doe eyes and you tried to believe him, but it was still difficult. “I’ll try to be more affectionate, I promise, I just didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. And if you need me to tell you I want you...I have since I first laid my eyes on you”

Your heart skipped a beat, but your whole body relaxed because that’s all you needed to hear.

“Can I kiss you?” He asked, still with your hand in his palm. You nodded, so he stood up and kissed you with the passion he hadn’t shown you in all these months.

Your hands traveled through his neck, hair and jawline, while his held you by the waist so close to him you felt you couldn’t breathe. The kiss started getting heated for the first time in your relationship, making your stomach contract again by the anticipation. You both started to get desperate, and while every second that passed took the worries about his attraction away, new ones about this being your first time being like this with him started settling in your brain.

His tongue demanded your mouth to open, and after yours did the same, he bit your lip softly. You moaned unconsciously and that was the last straw for him. He took your face in his hands and whispered in your ear softly.

“When is your dad getting home” The blonde started kissing your neck while waiting for an answer.

“I don’t know, but I don’t care either” You knew he was getting home in about an hour, but you wanted to make things more exiting, so you kept your mouth shut and dragged him to your room.

You closed the door and threw yourself on the bed, action which jerry followed. You hooked your leg in his waist and encouraged him to get on top which he accepted happily. His long blonde hair framed your face while his hands roamed your body, now without any worries.

“Do you promise to tell me if you get uncomfortable with something or want to stop?” You nodded really fast to resume the kissing, but he had plans to keep talking.

“I really want to show you how much I wanted you all these months, and how big my love for you is.” He got his hands under your top and you got rid of it immediately. “You’re the only woman of my life”

He went back to kissing your neck looking for your weak spot to remember later. His hands kept traveling freely through your body, and every noise of pleasure you made made him smirk against your skin. His mouth started getting near your breasts before he unclasped your bra. Everything was great until your stomach dropped after remembering he was in a band too and had groupies with probably better tits than you. He noticed the change of expression of your face and went back to kissing your mouth again.

“I don’t care about anything you think about yourself, im very lucky to be with someone as hot, smart and funny like you”

“Take off your shirt, please” You interrupted trying to get the bad thoughts off your mind. He nodded.

“Can I take my jeans off too? They’re getting too tight” You laughed and while he got a bit embarrassed, he felt good because he made you laugh. Besides, it was actually true, he was too hard to keep wearing pants. You blinked and he was already all over you again in only his boxers.

The hot kisses continued while his right hand made its way to your inner thighs, and you touched him through his underwear making his breath itch.

"Fuck i don't have a condom" He looked at you with dilated pupils and swollen lips. Who on earth could loose an opportunity like this?

"I don't care just...don't cum in me" You replied while trying to get your boyfriends underwear off.

"Don't worry, i won't" He nodded and did the same with your panties. He was about to position himself between your legs when you suddenly got a rush of dominance. The two first times you had with past boyfriends were really bad because they didn't know what they were doing at all, and even though you knew your actual boyfriend wasn't going to disappoint, you wanted to make this different.

"Can i ride you?" Your face got red before you could even finish the sentence, and you regretted what you did immediately, but it was too late. You felt yourself getting manhandled until you were on top of the blonde, giving you no option but to stick to your request. You both shared a few more desperate kisses before you took him in your hand and lowered yourself taking your time until both of your bodies were fully connected.

Your hips started to move involuntarily fueled by Jerry's moans, getting even wetter after each one. He looked through his eyelashes your body moving like ocean waves, and in an attempt of wanting to feel useful, he got you closer by your waist to his chest and started sucking one of your nipples. In some lonely nights you imagined this moment in a lot different ways and scenarios, but none compared to the real thing. You felt your body melting into his, and the love overflowing your soul. You had never felt this connection with anyone before. Maybe this was the love and confidence everybody talked about.

You were so high on pleasure you didn't notice your legs getting tired until you felt a cramp. You let out a small cry and stopped, making you boyfriend get out of the trance too and panic instantly.

"Y/n are you ok? Did i hurt you? What-" You shushed him with a small kiss and then threw your hands in the air.

"I'm fine, i'm fine. My leg just started to hurt but i'm ok" His expression relaxed and he got you off his lap in a second. A blink later, he was positioning himself again between your legs.

He didn't push slowly because he didn't need to. You threw your head back by the sudden pleasure and he sucked your neck while fucking you into the mattress. Not much time passed for your whole body to start tightening and your moans to get more pitched, he was hitting the right spot.

"You feel so good, cum for me" He grabbed your face aggressively and kissed you even harder than before, making you squeeze around him for the last time before letting go. An obsene sound came out of your mouth, which alerted Jerry to pull out just in time, cumming in your lower abdomen.

Five seconds later he got up, got dressed ridiculously fast and ran through your door.

"Babe what the fuck" You exclaimed in complete confusion. Turns out he had gone to get you something to get cleaned with, and got dressed in case your dad was home. You smiled and hugged him so hard you felt you broke some of his ribs.

"I love you so much, you have no idea" He said getting his breath back after your demolishing hug.

"No, you have no idea"

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

#jerry cantrell #jerry cantrell x reader #jerry cantrell fanfic #alice in chains #grunge #fanfic #oneshot #grunge fanfiction

61 notes · View notes

1up-girl · 6 months

Text

20 Questions

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 10 works.

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 131,856

3. What fandoms do you write for? Only Zelda right now, but I have done stuff for Evangelion and Teen Titans in the past! Also looking to add a Shingeki no Kyojin piece in there soon.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Reverdie (413), Fragmentation (290), After the Rain (200), Tacet (188) and Finding and Keeping (175)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Always! I'm very greatful for folks taking the time to read and comment on my stuff. It really means a lot to me, so I like to show my gratitude in the comments.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Ooof uhhhh like none? I think I did some themed one-shots that were downers but like...I really can't bring myself to end on angsty notes.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? They all end happy, but I think Love Stayed With Me has to be the happiest by default because [TOTK ending spoilers here]

8. Do you get hate on fics? Thankfully, no! It would be okay if I did, though. Like whatever, a hater isn't paying for my service so I wouldn't really care if they were wasting their energy in my comments section.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes! It depends on the situation, really. I'm a big fan of smut that is sort of exploratory and almost innocent, where two characters are exploring these feelings with one another and discovering that bliss for the first time. But on the other hand...I am like, beyond ready to write Link getting pegged LMFAO. I'm not too picky about smut.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? No... I don't think I have. I think I planned one when I was like 13 but I can't remember the fandoms or anything.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Have had stuff reposted without my permission on other sites, but my name was still attached to it. So like...not entirely stolen haha. No one reposted under a different author's name.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? No, but I WOULD LOVE THIS

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yesssss! Currently worked on A Song of Storms with @deiliamedlini!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship? I really think Zelink takes the cake for me. I've never simped so hard for a ship. I love how they are cosmically entwined, soulmates which can come in really lovely, heartfelt forms, or angsty, miserable forms. They aren't limited by one iteration. gOD.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? As much as I wish I could, I don't think a longfic is in the cards for me. I'm frankly not creative enough to keep the momentum up ;_;. Maybe if the right inspo hit. But at this point I write shorter things and I don't expect to not finish them at some point, even if they take a while to crank out.

16. What are your writing strengths? I like to think that I have strong ideas on characterizations, and that the prose carries the ideas that I'm trying to convey. (Particularly about Zelink.) I love the poetic imagery for them and enjoy metaphoers and loooove religious imagery for them as well.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Absolutely fucking plot and also finding the balance between like, wanting langauge to be flowery and not overdoing it. I am always tearing my hair out over it.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? Oh I'm very down lol

19. First fandom you wrote for? I think would have been Teen Titans when I was like 12.

20. Favorite fic you've ever written? UGHHHHH I don't know, maybe Reverdie because it was so music inspired? And I loooooove writing pining Link and the sexual tension between them. Part of me actually thinks about rewriting that and making it longer, dragging it out even more than just 4 chapters, but I think that's me being sadistic haha. Love Stayed With Me was also so personal to me because it was crafted sort of in real time with playing TOTK. And of course has all my own personal baggage tied into it.

THIS WAS FUN THANKS FOR TAGGING ME @zellink! I'll tag @deiliamedlini @wanderingnightingale @itcantbe @softlessly and anyone else who wants to do it!

#fanfiction #author #zelink #so much zelink

7 notes · View notes

astrobei · 1 year

Note

Quick! Tag your top favorite byler blogs (as many as you want) and tell my why you love them in one line to spread positivity on the dashboard and make someone's day!

YESSSSS ok buckle up everyone i have an excuse to Gush and these will Not just be one line sorry (i am not)

first and foremost, of course, my lovely lovely friends @bookinit02 @andiwriteordie @smoosnoom @wiseatom and @livsmessydoodles the MOST incredible and lovely people i have ever met in my life !! not only are they seriously the most talented writers and artists i have ever ever had the privilege of talking to, they are also just such kind and hilarious people and a solid 50% (at least) of the reason this community means as much to me as it does !! seriously so inspiring and uplifting and i look forward to talking to them every day because they never fail to make me laugh uncontrollably and inappropriately in public places, go give all their fics (and liv’s art) so much love RN bc they deserve it sm <3

@meanwillbyers my first Real mutual on st tumblr you are such a delight to see on my dash!! like actually mal is one of the funniest people Ever and such a talented artist AND writer like wtf . who let this happen 😭 has never had a bad take ever and is just generally such a refreshing name to see on my screen!

@lookslikefireflies literally she is such a talented writer, her will and max fic had me like . frothing at the mouth in tears on the bathroom floor NOT JOKING love love love seeing a message from u in my inbox or a comment from u on my fics, actually one of the sweetest ever and such a nice constant presence on my dash !!

@nancysglock HELLOOO wtf the first time i read one of her scripts it was over the summer and i dont remember which it was but i was SO EMOTIONAL WHEN I REALIZED IT WASN’T REAL omg but seriously so sweet i honestly geek out whenever you interact w my blog bc i’m such a fan LOL and the whiplash i get from your funny ask answers/posts vs ur scripts and rly well written gut-wrenching posts is so. wtf (<3)

@nnilkyway YELLING EVERY TIME HE POSTS ART seriously idk how u do it but the way u use color makes me gasp and i could probably sit there staring at anything u make for hours and hours,, and also they’re actually HILARIOUS yk when you find someone with your exact sense of humor and it is so extremely comforting and it feels like a warm hug,, literally what seeing ur posts on my dash is like i am sitting here patiently waiting for new nnilkyway content

@messrsbyler HOTTEST TAKES EVERRR and so many posts that never fail to make me sink to my knees and start sobbing SERIOUSLY one of the biggest brained people on this site,, also just extremely funny and sweet and i love getting messages/replies from you!! obsessed with you and your entire blog fr

this is by no means an exhaustive list, mostly just the people i interact w most on here! love u guys all so much, you seriously make it fun and exciting to be a part of the byler community, even when things r bleak and slow i always look forward to coming on here and talking to u !! thank u for giving me the motivation to keep writing fr <3

#ask #this took embarassingly wrong for me to write #i just have a lot of Feelings about peopleOk #all my followers r the coolest and best Ever #(real)

25 notes · View notes

oceangirl24 · 1 year

Note

15, 38 and 48 for the asks!

Hi! Thanks so much for the asks!

15. What’s your favorite AU that you’ve written?

Ooo, I haven't written an AU in ages. Years ago, when I was big into the seaQuest, I despised the direction the show took in the second season and came up an AU for it. The first attempt was... not good. lol I did start a rewrite a few years later but unfortunately, I never finished it (although I still have the handwritten notes for it). Do I remember a lot of details? Nope! But it's still up on FFN.

38. Did any of your fics get surprisingly popular (whatever that means to you)? Which ones? Why do you think they were so successful?

Warning: Long response, may veer off-topic slightly 😆

This is an interesting question. Honestly until I joined AO3 in 2021, I never thought about popularity or stats. I really didn't know it was thing. I was always on FFN so maybe that's why.

Based on stats across the board on the three sites I post on, it's easily Autumn in Philadelphia.

When I began AiP in 2002, it was one of a kind. No one else wrote Jonathan Turner as a central character and, to my knowledge, Audrey was the first published OC love interest for him. The popularity of the story back then surprised me as it was the era where OCs were heavily criticized and almost every one was labeled a dreaded Mary Sue. I still tear up over those OG comments wanting J and A together, some a decade plus after the last chapter was posted.

Coming back after 19 years away, the BMW fanfiction scene is very different. There are a ton of Jon & Shawn fics now, although I'm not sure how many are Jon-centric. Once I crossed over to AO3 and saw popularity was a thing I noticed that readers seemed to want extremely specific tropes handled in very certain ways for Jon and Shawn in order to bring in the kudos and comments, especially. Since I go in a very different direction with these tropes and have a very different story to tell, I knew I was fighting a losing battle but trying to get out of stats chasing mode was so hard.

Side note: When I started to write again on FFN I contacted everyone who supported me on the story back then, knowing they were likely out of the fandom and their accounts inactive. I just said thank you so much for commenting back then and it was rereading those comments that brought back me back to this story. The response was surprising because I didn't expect to hear anything. Some people responded right away with excitement. Some I heard from months later saying they never check FFN anymore but when they saw who the PM was from, they had to respond. Many said they would be reading. One person said AiP was the first fanfic they ever read and how much they loved it. Audrey was remembered fondly. Someone remembered the RPG I had forgotten about. How cool?

Now when I look at stats, I tend to focus more on FFN due to the detail of their stats and every month I have 5-10 people going through the whole story. Which floors me as it is not a short read. It is a complicated story.

Somehow, it's even closing in on 3K on WattPad which amazes me. BMW is largely Reader X or SI. (Are those the right terms? lol).

Maybe popular isn't the right word here. Longevity. I'm really surprised by AiP's longetivity.

Why? The level of detail maybe. Character development? How different it is? No clue.

48. What’s the last fic you read? Do you recommend it?

In a previous answer, the last read was Darlin' by @mrsmungus. Just before that, I read (am reading) Aftermath by MantaI305ApollosChariot. I dropped off on the MCU movies a while ago, but I really love her Wanda-centric fix-it story. She's amazing at filling me in on canon and what her changes are and why. Very enjoyable to read.

#my asks #boy meets world fanfiction #seaquest

7 notes · View notes

prophecydungeon · 2 years

Text

not quite to the date (yet) but ten years ago i posted a fic that is somehow still sitting on the front page of results by kudos and by bookmarks for the most popular ship in the most popular fandom on AO3 and i still don't know how that happened.

like... really genuinely truly i don't know what kind of WILD perfect-storm-level shit was going on to make this happen. the original post got eleven whole notes here on tungle (yeah i checked lmao). i am not, actually, a very Doing Numbers blogger or writer, nor had i ever been, nor will i ever be. as far as i know, there wasn't any wildass six degrees of separation thing that happened where someone very Doing Numbers made it Do Numbers. i didn't "advertise" it or anything (ppl who make fic graphics and have a posting/rbing/rting schedule.. i could never lmao), i didn't post it on every site known to man, i didn't tag it to hell, i didn't really do anything. it just fucking happened. and it's still happening!!! and i am just so fucking baffled. how did this happen. why are there people making tiktoks about this fic in the year of our lord 2022. how??????

i have a lot of very complicated feelings about this fic, with a lot of them boiling down to just, like, brain chemicals being very stupid, and i know that logically it's just brain chemicals gone bad! but it's still hard to shake ten (10!) years of feeling like my growth in writing is being constantly undercut by this thing that's created its own gravity well to keep sucking in kudos and comments when just about everything i've written since has been Better™ (which again, logically, i know is untrue -- i write for fandoms now that are relatively VERY small lol so of course nothing is ever going to Do Numbers again like this)

this fic was something i wrote after a very difficult-to-process series of events, so it was complete and utter wish fulfillment and it felt so good to write. the flip side of this, which in retrospect really soured the fic for me, is that i tried my damndest to live out the life i wrote in this fic. i went to grad school for linguistics two years later and TA'd, Just Like The Fic. it was supposed to be great! and those turned out to be the two most miserable years of my life. maybe not specifically because i was trying to live a daydream, but that disparity didn't help (though my friends certainly did). so in a way, aeiw is this image of a failed dream -- i'm not in linguistics as a field, not even remotely, and i likely never will be; i don't want to ever go back to academia, even though i will likely need to get another masters (derogatory) in my current field at some point.

BUT. i promised that this is not a negative post so i will pivot here to say very genuinely that i am so, so grateful to all the friendships and good times this fic has brought me. thank you to all the people i met because of this fic or while writing it. thank you to everyone who's gotten to know me for totally different reasons/fandoms/etc and then been like WAIT A SECOND. (it's so funny, every time.) thank you to everyone who's ever left kudos and said a kind word. (i still get kudos emails nearly every day just for this fic.)

and thank you to the incredibly beautiful personal anecdotes people have left on this fic, holy shit. i have a folder in my email for those specifically. here are some excerpts from comments that made me tear up:

Hey, so...you probably don't still read comments on this fic because it's so old and so wildly popular*, but I hope you see this. [...] I just started my first year of University as a Linguistics major, and I know for a fact that I wouldn't have figured out what I wanted to study had I never read this fic. I've always had trouble with school, and struggled to find subjects that weren't wildly difficult or insanely boring-until Linguistics. Now, I'm excited to learn and pursue my degree-maybe even a master's eventually. I just wanted to say thank you for this sweet story that stuck with me for all of these years, and helped me find what I want to do.

*i do. i read every single comment. every single one.

[...] Reading this, I don't understand how anyone could say that you, the writer, did this alone and will only ever be alone for this story.** I mean, we're separated by computer screens, but I feel that I was transported into your story in a way that transcends what is expected of the written word. Maybe this is my biased opinion as someone who has grown up in a secondary orality culture, but I just had to let you know that this story was more than the written word is often perceived to be. If that makes sense. I felt like I was there, getting the story and so caught up that I couldn't stop reading. And you might not be the narrator, but you're essentially god and you breathed life into these characters and I'm so in awe of you. You make it seem so easy! What's worse is I know it's not, so here I am, seeing something unfold with what looks like practiced ease when I know just how much work you've put into writing to get you to this point. I'm so proud of you! And it feels silly to say but I am, and I wanted you to know. [...]

**this is one of the most incredible things anyone has ever said to me.

[...] I first read this a long time ago (at least 6 years) when I was really Going Through It and this fic - specifically Dean - really resonated with me.*** It gave me an inkling (pun intended) of hope. And it was the first positive representation of tattoos that I'd seen. I started planning tattoos I wanted soon after reading this, using them the way Dean does in this to identify the important and best things in my life and figure out how to represent them and always have them with me. I just got my third done and I love all of them. So thank you for the impact that you've had on my life, and for writing such a wonderful story.

***i was really Going Through It as well. i'm doing great now and i hope you are too.

thank you to past me for writing this fic and finishing something "long" (lol..... lmao). thank you to past me for writing unabashed wish fulfillment, something i would lose the capability to do for a long time (dw, i got it back). thank you to this fic for irrevocably fucking up my AO3 statistics.

so anyways, ten years on i'm doing great. new career. new gender. new fursona. i live in a super cool area. i got like seven anime figures of this one horrendous guy. my sick tattoos have gotten even sicker. here's a portrait of the author for good measure:

and here are some fun facts about the fic that idr if i've ever shared before:

the scene at the very end where cas goes to get tattooed by dean? my beta wrote that for me. yes, the whole scene. thank you.

i don't remember who it was that carried a bike up some stairs but i always hefted my bike up onto my shoulder when walking it up my outside stairs so i pictured whoever that was doing it too (and i still have that bike! i refurb'd it last year!)

i think i own every vinyl i mentioned... i think

i definitely own led zeppelin's entire discography on vinyl

i finally bought a pair of rough-faced amethyst plugs for myself, something like two years ago? took me a while to get there

that sex scene was in there because i felt like i "had to" include one lmaoooo i had no idea what i was doing and i've written way better p*rn since then

when i turned 24 i did actually listen to 4 + 20 by csny first thing in the morning

soooo much of the tattoo and piercing stuff was so fucking pretentious of me.... but really, be thorough when looking for piercers and tattoo artists, stay safe, there are a lot of great resources out there

i actually pretty legitimately don't like showing my tattoos irl just because people can be really annoying/weird but i also just enjoy wearing long pants and long sleeves lol

...also yeah i do dress Like That. unironically.

some things i have written since then that i am very proud of:

P vs NP, RvB

the more i run (the farther away it seems), destiny

quema, bleach

in the details (not the devil), haikyuu!!

apsidial precession, destiny

and so in conclusion........ thank you. but i'm still baffled.

#this isn't a negative post i promise #I've Done Numbers You Wouldn't Believe #ten years. ten years!#fic talk

20 notes · View notes

naralanis · 6 months

Text

20 Questions

Thanks @silv3reyedstranger for the tag! My meeting can wait, this is more fun lol

How many works do you have on AO3?

44 (my wife's saying it's bad luck, so I guess I better make it 45 soon)

2. What's you total AO3 count?

601,330 which is weirdly way more than I expected but also way less? How dare AO3 not count all the words I've never posted, this is homophobia

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I got my start in the Devil Wears Prada and Harry Potter fandoms, and then the supercorp gifs pulled a bag over my head, tossed me in a van, and made me hyperfixate on a really bad but really gay show, so. I've also written for Xena Warrior Princess and ATLA/ATLOK, but I've never posted for those. There is an errant OUAT SwanQueen one-shot out there, courtesy of some insane people I love.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

In order, they’re Perhaps, For the Better, Perfect, The Date and, surprisingly, The Wrong Way. I didn't expect that last one at all, to be honest.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do appreciate every single one (they’re a writer's main source of nourishment) but I am terrible at responding to each and every one. There will be times where I'll go on comment-replying marathon and then I forget about it for like, a year. My bad! I do love all the comments and I re-read them all the time when I'm feeling kind of shit. They bring so much joy to my heart and occasional (happy) tears to my eyes.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably Unshackled, but I'm not sure if that counts because the happy ending came in part two. But for the people who didn't know there was a part two… that was probably the angstiest I've managed! I love angst, but I have to have the happy ending, whether I'm reading or writing it.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oof, I don't know. I try to have happy endings to most things. I think the one that jumps to mind is i don't know how to dance so slow (to keep up with you). I don't think it's necessarily the happiest ending, it's just this whole fic plays in my head so clearly, almost like it's a movie, and it just gives me the good feels. It's short and sweet, and it makes me happy.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I think if I wrote more I'd get some lol. I used to get some trolls here and there, especially flames back on FanFiction.net. A couple on Perhaps, but the Cissamione peeps were awesome helping me deal with them. Nowadays everything's pretty chill.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

*points at The Adventures of Soft Butch Hermione*

Not to mention all the stuff I don't post. Smut has to be just right to make the cut. Nothing too crazy, but ya know I have to sprinkle some praise kink in there.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Nope, and I don't think I ever will. The most I've done is borrow other characters from within the same universe (see Luthor Motor Racing AU), usually as a joke/easter egg. I'm usually not a fan or crossovers (writing or reading), but there are a handful of exceptions here and there.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

HAHA yeah. A couple of times. Usually found on Wattpad, or translated into Portuguese and posted to some Brazilian site without my permission. Side note, why is it always Brazilians. I'M ONE OF YOU, PLS

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

Yeah! To Russian, French and Mandarin (with permission) and Portuguese (without), at least as far as I know. I'm totally cool with translations, just like. Ask me first, give me the credit for the original work, and send me a link! I love to see translations of my stuff, especially if it's in a language I can speak.

13. have you ever cowritten a fic before?

@shadowdianne and I had some incredible back-and-forth a few years back, but it never really went anywhere (although I maintain our ideas were FIRE). It was a frankly amazing take on Narcissa as a character, with some sprinkle of a Narlily friendship and Cissamione endgame. We both had other stuff going on, so it never really developed further, but I still have the docs with all of our ideas and frankly hilarious commentary.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Don't make me pick just one, I can't.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

At this point, all of them I think? Brain's just not braining that way.

16. What are your writing strengths?

It used to be world-building and environment descriptions, but to be honest I haven't flexed those writing muscles in ages. I think I can tell a lot with not much real-estate. I also think my readers/fellow writers would be better at answering this one lol

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

The writing part.

Jokes aside, it's actually stringing a plot together. I write by vibes.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I technically speak four languages, but I always worry whether whatever foreign language dialogue I insert sounds genuine enough to sound like a native speaker, so I always ask for a second (and a third and fourth) opinion anyway.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter, on a little known (to Americans) social media platform known as Orkut, and then on FFNet. Then I deleted all traces of that and had a fresh start with Devil Wears Prada.

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

It's like asking me about my favourite child. Right now it's while all of the lines are blurring, which is a WIP but I just have. SO MUCH. To add to it. AND I DON'T HAVE THE TIME OR BRAIN CAPACITY but I. Love that plot in my brain. Maybe one day.

I won't tag anyone this time around, but writer peeps, feel free to take it and run with it!

#silv3reyedstranger #ask game #ask naralanis and maybe she will deign to respond #fic asks #this is a lot better than this DoS webinar #god I hate webinars

4 notes · View notes

minmin-pal · 9 months

Note

i dunno how to start this but here's my ask about killer in love :D

chap 10: i finally see the guy! the guy that i think you meant? or is the one that's like "i can have anyone i want" type? i also saw arata and stalker dude. them going to disneyland after burying someone is giving me whiplash but in a good way?/pos and i finally saw the scenes of kokoa smilling and saying "don't die." and the pic of suzuki after just stabbing the stalker. i actually really adore the artstyle omg, i see what you mean by it's super pretty

and i noticed how like during the car sequence when suzuki asked if he could call her by name? in the first panel of her it showed her eyes as normally detailed, but then the next panel when she calls him by his name, it's suddenly detailed? i love this? it makes it so easy to get immersed? and it's giving kokoa a kind of eerie feeling around her lol if that makes sense, but suzuki is actually so expressive i like how it's different from the other characters:0

i'm getting somewhat attached to them (suzuki and kokoa) now and i'm very nervous lol, i don't even know how this'll end since i'm on the 'dude disturbs suzuki and kokoa in their table' scene at the start of chap 10, but yea i should probably continue now lol

yikes points for arata and stalker, but i already worry abt this dude oh no, and yep i'll continue reading now but gahh i really like how they managed to show suzuki's thoughts ngl, at the start showing why he joined a crowd like arata's and how he tried to change the way he presented himself/his image. it went from him accepting to be kokoa's fake boyfriend to something extremely out of the normal happening to him? the whole stabbing someone then the random people in the group taking photos and making him trend on twt, online harassment and it's all piled up on him now. things never went right before, and just when he was trying to be 'normal' it didn't work and his (presumably) tired of it all now, but even when he had the knife to his throat he was able to smile even a bit then as his about to plunge it, kokoa just- runs up to him (and i'm just noticing this now but did she block the knife with her hand? is that why there's a small scar there in the "don't die" scene?)

but aa, all the details like his eye-widening, the background tuning our during these shots and kokoa just so gorgeously detailed and smiling "Don't die. Let's live together." then suzuki tearing up?? i didn't expect this to be so gut-wrenching ;; i'm- really curious what she meant by saying "I'm the same as you, I'm worthless shit, I know that desire to die but I don't want you to die." i realize now we don't actually know much about her at this point other than her having a stalker, being somewhat off-putting (though that's probably just me reading into it too much?), her enjoying the same stuff as suzuki that got exposed as a 'nerd' at the table and that's about it? ig? i assume we'll find out more about her in the future chapters though.

the last scene with suzuki crying and saying about "The feeling of being hugged is incredible. i don't know if the "You're like a goddess." scene is part of the actual manga or if the site i'm reading it on inserted it in like an art piece or something? i'm assuming it's part of the story but ahh, the symbolism of this last scene is giving foreshadowing vibes sm but it shows their dynamic kinda well i'm assuming :') suzuki seeing kokoa like a goddess and him feeling like he was 'pardoned, and allowed to live'. i'm looking forward to how this dynamic grows though defintely, it's like suzuki is uhm- what's the word? putting her on a pedestal maybe? maybe 'looking at her as though she's his redemption/saving grace'? i suppose that would fit my current understanding of their dynamic though it might change i dunno, and yep i'll continue reading now lol

last bit- I FINALLY GOT TO THE LAST SCENE OF THE CHAPTER?? WOOHOO?? not really woohoo though, it's just the dude's ugly mug lol

chap 10.2: ohh, so so far suzuki's dealing with the random dudes that know kokoa, he asks about it but then she gets a bit upset so suzuki backpedals? i'm assuming it's meant to be off-putting since they purposefully mentioned about "why didn't she just block the stalker?" thing that suzuki though in the apartment scene. all the shots of them during the night with the sparkles of the attractions around them is so pretty in all honesty, suzuki's embarassed/flustered reactions are a bit cute to read lol/lh

chap 11: THE DUDE IS BACK :'(!! suzuki come backkk ;;!! this guy haS A KNIFE???

chap 12: is the reason kokoa had a melancholic expression when asking suzuki to never change because of this dude? i know his the 'bad guy' in this scenario but it's that sense where the writer is so good at writing that i actually understand? his entire life got upended whether kokoa meant to or not, even if she didn't mean to, the fact he suffered is valid though so the lien of "Damn, I wish I could kill them all." i dunno i just react to it as"yeah that's fair" if that made sense? i dunno, off handed tiny rant lol sorry

oh wow okay i finally scrolled down to the part where he did the thing to kokoa, major yikes ;; i'm both looking forward to/dreading how suzuki will react once he finds out the dude took kokoa, it was nice meeting flustered suzuki o7o7

chapter 13: they were probably such good friends??? why would you slap her??? he has an inferiority complex is that it-?/lh he has a warped perception of what 'loving' kokoa is like ;; WAIT HIS THE KILLER??? HUH?? oh wait so the black haired transfer student actually seemed pretty chill? though i assume his nonchalance just pissed off this dude more ;; suzuki's here :D

chapter 14: oh god his comments are disgusting, he earned that punch from suzuki lol the artist really did do such a good job on the art though, all the shading and shadows really helps to paint the scene ahh/gen/pos the "I'm gonna slaughter you." scene is so intense looking like actually, the persepective!! it's so good!!

suzuki: "No way, another phyco." meanwhile suzuki:

(did that meme make sense, i hope it did lol)

is kokoa some type of evil mastermind?? or is the story just misdirecting the reader's expectations?? the writing is so good i'm becoming just as confused as suzuki lmao, and oH!! they used the manga pages!! as the background for this scene with suzuki blacked out with only his widened eyes visible, the mood setting is actually unreal i love this/pos suzuki's definitely an unreliable narrator now that i realize lol but also it's his perspective so i can't say i fault him at all, but woah i like how suzuki's eyes get all fogged up in these intense moments, super cool detail

YEAAA, HE GOT HIT WITH THE GLASS! SUZUKI GOO! OH MY GOD HE AIMED FOR THE DUDE'S EYE??? the pained expressions are so starkly different compared to the usual expressions and i just love the intensity of all the frames<33 all the rough lines and wrinkles, the more stiff edges of the character really exemplifies it a lot :D

chap 15: this dude is really adding more weight to the suspiciousness of kokoa, i'm so confused on what to think and believe ahh i adore this level of writing that manages to cause this feeling in readers lol,really puts you in the shoes of suzuki. I WASN'T READY FOR THIS SCENE OF SUZUKI SLASHING THE DUDE'S THROAT??? THE ART AND EVERYTHING IS SO PRETTY!! i adore suzuki's blank-eyed expression sm lol

chap 16: now i can't help the feeling that kokoa is using suzuki ;; though i guess that would make sense in the genre and story so far? ah suzuki's conscience is getting to him now lol, oh yea blank-eyed suzuki is the normal now ig, he finally decided on his purpose now though somehow i feel like this is what kokoa wanted lol, idk complex stories always confuse me lmao

the shot of him saying "Thats my purpose in life." is so nicely drawn omg<3 i love all the details, it looks so clean yet so 'sketchy' at the same time if that makes sense. the expressions were so nice in this chapter ngl/pos

YEA!! KOKOA IS SMILING AND BLUSHING:D i don't know how these two are ending but kokoa really does look pretty. the art is so nice to look at and oh no the camera was recording them ;;

chap 17: kokoa being sneaky and i assume jealous is very amusing to watch lol/lh o7 riko chan

chap 18.1: oh okay that was an eye opener on kokoa lmao, so i'm assuming something happened or kokoa's always just been catering to other people and stuff like that? kokoa's reaction to "can you really be happy like that?" feels intense ngl, maybe it's cause the previous characters of focus have all been dudes who are interested in kokoa aside from that one girl friend of hers that warned suzuki im pretty sure, i like the character insights so far :D

will suzuki have to reject or harm riko :(? oh but his back to somewhat gentle expressions lol, maybe it was the nap or something. OH MY GOD THE KNIFE CAME OUT, THEY'LL HAVE TO KILL HER WON'T THEY?? TT oh wait his sweating while threatening her lol, there's finally some sign of hesitation ig?

oh my fucking god

he actually killed her

WHY AM I INTERNALLY HURT SM TT riko got me attached oh no :'( the light was finally back in his eyes too ;; o7 and yep his losing himself (i'm at chapter 20 while writing this, how did i skip the chap indicators lol)

chap 21: oh my god that boyfriend is a douchebag wha the heck, IN HER HOME TOO???? all the scribbles over the pages to show suzuki suddenly 'realizing' was such a cool effect omg, i'm seeing a recurring theme of people saying to kokoa "- just because your somewhat cute." and other similar stuff like that, will her story involve something about her putting up a front or changing herself somehow?

oh yea, suzuki knows at this point lol, though ig he doesn't care anymore? or maybe he does, i'll see next chapter but i finally found the other scene you showed me :D that uh- "Okay then, why don't we kill that guy?" one with suzuki's smiling face lol, and yep his starting to lose it (i feel as though i've already said this)

chap 26: oh wait :( it's showing yuki and kokoa's trip to disneyland now, kokoa reacted exactly how suzuki did lmao. r they riding the same rides too? i don't remember the specifics of their rides ;;

chap 28: ... absolute whiplash ;; i- i love this?? it's made me feel things?? i've reached the scene from the prologue?? it's all coming together and i adore the connection they now share of 'not having anyone but each other'? i don't know how the actual ending will be like, but for no i'm really happy that they didn't make kokoa to be some type of 'in control, manipulator' type of character? she has her own motivations? she feels so human? i love how the writer was able to write this story so well that when suzuki was demanding an answer from kokoa of "whether to kill him or let him (her well ig exboyfriend?) live" and you could see she was at a loss for words, she didn't know what to say and suzuki was getting more frustrated? i, actually like the fact that kokoa leapt to protect yuki from suzuki? yuki was horrible and hurt her, took her for granted but yuki is confused but she loves yuki still?(i assume so at least) it's such a cool parallel to suzuki killing riko now that i think about it but just inversed?

riko loved suzuki sincerely and wanted to be with him, the "but i love __" moment was suzuki killing riko 'to not cause kokoa any trouble' (i don't know how to phrase this right but i hope the idea got across lol)

yuki 'loved' kokoa and literally breaks up with her, the "but i love __" moment was her literally running after suzuki, trying to stop him from killing yuki and even throwing herself at him

riko loved suzuki but suzuki loved kokoa more, kokoa loved yuki but yuki loved (idk fame? money? the name of that girl he was sleeping with that i forgot?)

i adore this bit a whole lot ngl, when kokoa proceeds to try and 'butter up' (for lack of a better term) suzuki, did she even believe herself? or was she trying to convince herself more than she was suzuki? and now they're both united again, under the "I'm the same. I have nobody but you." and- well i gues they don't really anymore do they? it's so much more different than their earlier dynamic, suzuki actually knows things about kokoa now. his seen her 'ugly', she's not just a 'random cute girl' anymore, maybe nor is she even just a 'goddess that pardoned me, that allowed me to live' since i'm pretty sure the spotless view he had of her is gone now. she's human, they know each other now. they're on the floor crying and hugging and goddamit i can feel myself tearing up too ;; /lh there's no more of that- idealizing suzuki had? is it bad i like this development a lot?

"You've finally noticed me. But that doesn't stop us crying. I can't help it and neither can you." has my heart on a platter, this made me feel too many feelings lol/gen/pos

chap 29: "I wish we had met sooner. If we had, neither of us would've been alone." why is this such a gut-wrenching line, why do i like that they're finally having a conversation ? i dunno, i know it's just been unfortunate circumstances that led them to each other but i can assume either of them would've cracked from their 'normal' eventually, but ahh the parallels again! at first it was suzuki who we knew the thoughts of and it was kokoa who seemed 'mysterious' and we didn't understand but now the roles have been reversed and now kokoa's the one asking "if suzuki will still be with her forever even if he doesn't like her anymore?"

oh my god suzuki pat kokoa in the same way or place on the head that yuki did, it is now i realize perhaps when kokoa first said for suzuki not change, she was referencing her bf lol kokoa's new haircut looks really pretty ngl though that's likely just the artstyle looking nice in general,

chap 32: i feel like i may have not explained it properly in my last few paragraphs lol, but ahh i suppose this is the bit where they actually have an actual honest conversation? seeing as the first time i mentioned 'they were having a conversation' it was pretty much just kokoa talking? suzuki wasn't as invested? i don't know how to phrase stuff ;;

his being honest, his finally properly realized instead of earlier where he was thinking "I won't let myself think.", there's no 'goddess', there are just two people. they're both coming to terms with it, that noit wasn't real. i'm scared of the next chapter but why do i feel like suzuki's maybe gonna turn himself in or something? maybe he'll still hold up his promise to make kokoa happy and maybe cover for her?

kokoa wants to believe but suzuki's already been in that position, he knows that won't make her happy. "Being loved by someone like me won't make you happy." i'm actually getting teary ;; "You'll be fine, even if you're alone." wow ok i didn't need my heart today i guess :melt_smile:

the introspection of suzuki while his on that ledge, the lack of backgrounds in the memory giving harsh contrast to the busy and filled background of when his looking down is genuinely so amazing, in the police car too, his so angry and it's understandable why, the art is beauitufl and perfectly captures everything. the shot of suzuki crying, screaming with snot dripping and saliva leaking from his mouth, just purely uncontrolled crying. the lines are harsh, intense and then there's the last shot with the barebones shading, soft colouring and melancholic expression and it all feels so fitting/gen

i'm getting whiplash from kokoa's backstory reveal and the ending of the story itself/lh i'm actually at a loss for words? i'm pretty sure the full story will properly register in my head in a few hours but as of now, i just loved everything? the beginning, the ending that i never saw coming from a mile away, all the characters, i realize i might be lacking in experiences to properly appreciate this story but for now, i can say i genuinely did love it all. thank you? for letting me be aware that this existed?/gen/lh

the culmination of kokoa's story: it explaining why she said "I'm a worthless shit.", why she goaded riko about "not making an effort" she parroted the sentence of "Did you really expect to be loved unconditionally?" and the fact that that parallels the message she received of basically saying "Don't look for love." or something like that, it's a bit blurry right now, and why she mentioned the prince metaphor, it shows her rejecting stalker dude and the "i have a nice nose" dude lol, it showed her family and how the way she coped with everything harming her reputation and following her till the end of the story (the being seen with older men thing her classmates were gossiping about), how changing herself seemed to work for a while but it was never enough for others, it wasn't enough for her. this whole story was tragic and i realize damned by the narrative from the beginning, it was always foreshadowing something ominous but- i can't say i regret reading this. it was a very fun experience and i thank you a lot for looking it so much, i ended up reading it too.

it's not really spoilers anymore for you to talk about why you related to suzuki, if you still wanted to chat about that, the art was just as gorgeous from the start till the end, i liked it all a lot.

thank you min<3

(also fair warning and apology lmao, i might've missed a few "chap XX:" signifiers like that since i was just reading the manga in one tab then auto writing what i thought in the other tab like some kind of journalist lol so a few are out of place or maybe don't make sense, i hope the general idea gets through tho/gen)

aaaa

okok first of all ive read through and i must say im so happy u liked it this is a big favorite of mine and i havent shown it to anyone really before (bcuz its kinda.... sad) but if u liked killer in love u should definitely check out boy's abyss its A LOT like killer in love... without the killing ive sat here typing out a response but honestly you hit a lot of feelings i had right on the nail.. and honestly you caught a LOT of stuff faster than i did- i only realized after a reread that the part where kokoa says "did you really expect to be loved unconditionally?" didnt click until i reread it- also you didnt dislike kokoa, which is really telling of you as a person when i read it, it was obvious the author was trying to make us think kokoa was the manipulator or something, and it just felt off the comments on it when i read were people hating on her and such and i always liked her (ill say something more indepth having to do with her in a second but i wanna finish this point first) im happy she was kinda just a victim and wasnt using him (though she sorta was- atleast not to the extent the manga couldve made her) its all just very genuine (ive been typing this for. an hour. and it is only one pragaraph long. im sorry if this is really short my brain is like .. mushy)

OK SO im really not typing anythong of sumbstance im sosry

THAT SCENE. IS SO SWEET because it introduces the idea of them getting away from eachother. in that short time they knew eachother their relationship turned really codependant suzuki was literally killing all her problems- which to begin with was toxic, but now, shed reached a point of needing him, and as long as he lived he would need her too like a soldier and their country country needs soldier, soldier is dependant on country- its literally their home think koreans signing up to fight in war to aid japan (oppressors) during ww2 they couldnt LEAVE korea, and they were much too poor to feed themselves or family, so theyd join so their fsmily would get food from the military its a bit of an extremem comparison. but its not wrong :grin:

kokoas backstory singlehandedly explained why she was her, how she was her, excused her actions, and cleared up her character shes genuinely just unforfunate in every aspect which is just so heartbreaking cuz its litterally not her fault she tried, and failed, and tried again and failed and tried and failed again she just attracts weirdos i guess

my favorite part is when suzuki kills her boyfriend because, she *technically* instigated it, but he knew she didnt want the boy dead and suzuki, he just lost it by then hed killed riko already, and he now was done for no matter what hed either run away with kokoa or die or go to jail so for him to sacrificed so much for her, just for her to have someone she still loved other than him yeah i get where he came from killing the guy was. a bit much. but its understandable amd thats whats so great about this!!! theyre all so undoubtedly human its amazing...

the reason i like suzuki or related to him and whatnot was his relationship with kokoa im a- was a really obsessive person a while ago recently id say counting today as august its been a good 6-7 months that was honestly my rock bottom, and it was then that i read kimi ni koisuru satsujinki and when i got to when he killed riko and it was just kinda like. i would do that too and thats when it kinda clicked that i was kinda fucked at the time you can tell im being vague cuz i dont like to talk about it

aswell as the youre like a goddess scene it reminded me of how i felt about this one person. and how feeling like that kinda pushed them away from me, its just really eye-opening to see someone doing things you do, and recognizing it as a bad thing, then realizing that that in turn makes you a bad person aswell kokoa, kinda like. them. was viewed in a really uplifting way and they, or kokoa was just a human and they were flawed, and they had layers o them, and they werent just a shoulder to be leaned on and . suzuki (or me aswell) just failed to come to terms with that, and in the manga's case suzuki did eventually reach that, and let kokoa go but i was kinda like suzuki after he killed kokoa's boyfriend

completely deluded, not willing to face reality but (they) werent like kokoa in that sense, because they realized the. not goodness of the situation, and instead of staying (like kokoa did with suzuki out of fear) they just. left me which im glad they did honestly, cuz that was the healthiest option fot them

really fucked with me though, since it was just. sudden i had it coming though i was a real prick

anyway IM REALLY GLAD U LIKED IT i was scared u wouldnt really care for it so this was really heartwarming thanks custard or mikey

mustard

#min-pal.asks #mikey 🍮

2 notes · View notes

otakween · 2 years

Photo

.Hack//G.U. Begins

A manga recap released for the Nintendo Switch version of .Hack//G.U. The manga is broken up into 3 sections: SIGN, IMOQ, and Roots. You can find it on the Bamco site here: https://www.bandainamcoent.com/landing/hack-gu-begins-manga

.Hack//SIGN

-I like the art style, even though it looks kind of sketchy and unfinished. They managed to make Sora look hot which is no small feat lol.

-Listening to the SIGN OST reading this was very nostalgic. I think I’ll always feel the most connected to SIGN and its characters compared to the later entries in the franchise.

-The fact that they treat player killing like this horrific act is a little hard to take seriously. I feel like if a game has that mechanic and is full of hormonal teens/preteens, it would be pretty commonplace. I guess that’s Japanese politeness for you...

-It’s interesting reading something written after everything has already come out. They drew Sora knowing he’d become Haseo and it kinda shows. I can see this Sora turning into Haseo way more than I can see anime!Sora becoming Haseo.

-I can never get enough of seeing Tsukasa and Subaru being cute together, so I’m glad they had Sora react to that.

-Not Sora having the sad Naruto flashback where nobody likes him lol. I would have really loved to have seen more IRL Ryou, both as a kid and a teen. It would especially be interesting to see what the heck he was doing when he went through his batshit crazy phases online.

.Hack//

-Funny how this section is just called “.Hack//” I guess they never really gave it an overarching name, huh...

-Omg it’s the .Hack//Zero version of Sora! I didn’t even think about the fact that Ryou was in SIGN and G.U. but not IMOQ. (Unless you count Skeith). Really interested to see where things go from here since I never read Zero.

-Lol @ Sora’s “there’s nothing special about Kite, he just has an off-spec bracelet.” Yeah, pretty much. (I’ve never liked Kite).

-I appreciated the callback comparing Tsukasa gaining strength from Subaru to Kite and BlackRose. It’s annoying that the anti-social Sora has to learn a generic “power of friendship/love” lesson, but the continuity is nice.

-The “Ryou was there the whole time as a ghost!” thing is interesting, but iirc Haseo has no memory of when he was Sora, right? I wonder how this manga will handle that...(Edit: this section ends with him getting the amnesia).

-Oh my God, they managed to throw an “apoptosis” mention in there...of course

-Cool to see all the random background party members in this art style. Kinda a shame they didn’t do more with some of these characters. The designs were so good!

.Hack//Roots

-Reading this in quick succession makes me wonder. Did Ovan know about Sora and what happened with him and Morganna? I can’t really remember why he latched onto Haseo so intensely. (Only other explanation would be gay lol).

-Honestly, Ovan and Shino were made for each other. Both annoyingly cryptic and “cool” in that dumb anime way. I wonder if anyone out there ships them...

-Even though I don’t ship them, Shino and Haseo do make a handsome couple. I appreciated their heart-to-heart in chapter 3. Felt like a real conversation instead of a bunch of vague catchphrases. (Also we get to see blushy Haseo hehe)

-I can’t take Shino’s tear drop tattoo seriously. I know it’s just supposed to be a fantasy thing, but I just think “oh, so she’s killed someone before”

-This section wraps up on my least favorite parts of the Roots/G.U. saga: Haseo’s rage monster phase. And of course Ovan comes back to be annoying too. Bleh. Ah well. I can definitely see the value in putting something like this out for people who don’t have time to watch SIGN, Roots and play IMOQ before jumping into G.U. It’s also nice to see some plot points from a new POV and with a new art style. Probably wouldn’t read this again, but I had fun taking a stroll down memory lane.

#dot hack #.hack #.hack// G.U. Begins #manga #dot hack manga

19 notes · View notes

rivertalesien · 8 months

Note

I never did figure out your take on Elden Ring. Did you hate it that much? Did you ever continue? I had to my blood pressure was getting too high lol

I got a month's worth of hate messages for having an opinion about this game, in my own little space, and had folks trying to discourse me over it. Because I'd committed some kind of blasphemy actually giving some thought to said opinion and it was wrong. An opinion. It was ridiculous. I may have blocked a few people over it. Also ridiculous, but dogpiles over fandom wank are too.

Meanwhile, on Reddit, players bitch at all hours how the game is trash and somehow never get hate for it. It feels more like a support group over there. Reddit. I got harassed on Tumblr. Make it make sense.

But I'll wrap it up for you: I think Elden Ring, my opinion only, is what you would get if you asked an AI to come up with a From Software game if it were written by GRRM.

Story-wise, it has about that level of conviction. Play-wise, it's fun until it's pure abuse.

Want more?

I laugh at the people who say "this game doesn't hold your hand" while hundreds if not thousands of players have spent hundreds of hours building wikis and creating videos to help players with everything the game doesn't hold your hand about. Because sometimes, you need INFORMATION and the game couldn't be bothered. Like, a starting point? What's that. Narrative coherence and an abundance of storytelling opportunities (lost journals, letters, NPCS) that would help with the world-building this game couldn't really be bothered with? What's that.

That's why I say it feels like an AI built it and I think games in the very-near future maybe composed in just such a manner. Why pay GRRM for a handful of notes when you can get AI to just crib the whole thing for you? For nothing (this little point is kind of what drives me on this: it's coming, it's happening and authors like GRRM should be very wary of their work being used like that).

As for playing the game, I will backup to my nephew who tried to kill a dragon one time. Like you do. It was like a hidden spot, the last big boss or whatever, and it took him just about a month. One boss. He played it daily. He played upwards of six hours per day. He wore out every weapon and character configuration he could think of. He watched a couple of other players manage to beat it. Also after dozens of hours of playing.

I watched him a couple of times. I saw him tear up.

Is that what games are supposed to do? I asked him if he was having fun. He actually said he didn't know.

Every single time he died he had to restart from a site of grace far from the boss fight: he had to fight through the same overpowered beastmen or whatever they were and frequently died just from getting stressed and falling the wrong way off the little cliff to get to said boss fight. Generally, this took him about ten minutes from the site of grace to the boss fight locale with only minimal trouble.

Ten minutes.

The fight would last maybe five until he got killed.

So, about a 15 minute wait to restart the boss fight.

And this isn't the only boss fight that is like this, with bosses that are so ridiculously overpowered, all your stats mean nothing. Players work their booties off for very, very, very little reward. And get high blood pressure. Nice. And it's somehow addictive too? Not so nice. Don't know if you're having fun? What?

I played up to a point where I realized all I was doing was participating in some masochistic ritual (I'm not a masochist). I wasn't having fun slogging through it, not even sure if I was interacting in the correct order or I missed someone I was supposed to meet, not having a clue how any of this was supposed to go. Because it's a story. But no one was telling it and it felt, almost from the gitgo, like a trick.

Open world games should involve exploring and even participating in the world-building going on. It's one thing AC, God of War, Ghost of Tsushima, Skyrim, even GTA et al got right: if you're going to play, then play. Make it something big and worth getting lost in. Tell the damn story. Use every tool in your impressive tool box. Elden Ring had no excuse to leave so much out and have suck-ups say iT dOesNt HoLD yOuR HaNd or the classic GeT Gud. Fans are holding each others hands trying to puzzle it out. And they paid an awful lot to do the job Bandai/FS should have done. And they got shit on for it.

Every single strategy any player found and shared with others, got wiped out. Not glitches being fixed. Strategies being removed to allow the game to cheat on the players. As if they don't have all the advantages already. The bosses in this game are ridiculous. Even little monsters like the devil dogs can take a player out in one or two surprise attacks and that's just stupid. Even Assassin's Creed's chickens couldn't do that.

And those were some mean-ass chickens. But the game didn't mistake them for mini-bosses.

Imagine being a player who has spent hours looking for a way to kill random graft giant no. 73, finding it, then uploading the video with narration to Youtube (that's some EFFORT), only for all that work to be made null and void once FS found out and issued an "update."

Imagine spending hours and hours trying to kill the last boss, the Elden Beast, but you keep dying and having to START OVER, going through goofy overpowered boring Radagon AGAIN just to get to the EB.

You get there.

You and your Spirit buddy have got plenty of health. You've found the right weapon, the right mix of shit and that sucker is almost dead, hardly anything left on the health bar. Yours is full, it's going to happen this time AND THEN

Motherfucker kills you with one move. A move you got hit with before and didn't die over. But you did just as this guy was going down.

And it happened again. And again. And again.

I'm not making this up, Reddit is FULL of stories like this.

I read somewhere that Elden Ring might have been the most popular game of 2022, but it was the game players were least-likely to finish. They'd give up.

Can't think why.

Who wants raised blood pressure over a slog of a fight that is constantly telling you it's cheating?

Timing is everything in these games. You have to hit the right spot at the right moment for the game to give in. That's programming for you. You miss it, you die. Guess how many right spots and right moments there are.

I can see where more masochistic players would simply love it and yay for them, but I find it insulting.

If you go back far enough, to the original Tomb Raider games, it was absolutely essential to buy the guides to help you through it. You couldn't do the game without them. If you tried, you'd just be massively frustrated and probably stop playing very early on. The games were crude compared to what we have today. They followed a predictable path and you couldn't go outside of that. Saw that recently with the SW Fallen Order game, but it had the benefit of years of intuitive game design. You don't need the book for it.

With an army of designers and creatives at their beck and call, why did BN/FS create a game that was gorgeous to look at, gorgeous in character design and movement...and not finish?

Somewhere in that production they decided to leave out the story GRRM wrote (on the side of a napkin?) for them. A story that would have held all the threads together and given it some kind of emotional core. A reason to keep going. We're not the storytellers, they are.

But I don't think they really cared about the story. Their brand is Maximum Sadism and if that's what you want, there it is. $70 please.

I might restart Odyssey. I loved those dorks.

#questions #elden wring #no I will not be listening to your opinion today #post it on your own blog #anyone trying to sic another mob on me is going down

0 notes

kelliealtogether · 2 years

Note

2, 4, 5, 6 for a question of space and smbts if it is ok to do that lol

That is totally okay, Anon! Two for the price of one! 🥰

A Question of Space 🚀

2: What scene did you first put down?

"The scene" for this fic, the reason why I wrote it at all, was when they floated in zero-G and kissed, however, the first scene I actually wrote for A Question of Space was when Ronan finds out Adam's a cyborg.

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

So much of the dialogue in this fic was fun to write. It's hard to just pick one line/conversation. But I always like taking bits of canon and bending them a little to fit the fic, and I like this part a lot:

Ronan had rigged a supply dolly with a series of strong magnets he’d reversed the poles on. He’d attached an old exhaust fan to the bottom of it, creating a rudimentary hoverboard. Then he’d found Parrish.

Parrish looked from the descent pod he was inspecting to the rigged up dolly to Ronan. “I’ll pass. I appreciate my limbs and their usability. Blue’s only a passable med tech when someone gets cut, not broken.”

“Parrish, get on.”

“Lynch.”

“Live a little. It’s a feat of engineering.”

“That’s not a feat of engineering. That’s a safety hazard.”

5: What part was hardest to write?

The courtroom scene, because I kept tearing up. I legit do not cry ever. When reading, when writing, when watching movies. I am a robot. My eyes are deserts. But writing the courtroom scene, I kept getting so emo. In canon, we get that scene from Adam's perspective. But in courtroom scene iteration in the fic, it's from Ronan's POV after doing all this work to find a loophole to get Adam out of being shot off into space and they might be too late and just... 😭😭😭 The whole time.

6: What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics?

It's in space? I don't know with one. I wanted to write a space fic, so I did. The only think I can think of it that I don't really have "messages" in my fics, but this one kind of has a whole "bureaucracy sucks" thing going for it. I don't know, anon! I just write them because I have fun writing them! I leave it to you guys to tell me if they're special or different.

Sore Must Be the Storm 🌧

2: What scene did you first put down?

Their initial meeting, which will be in chapter ten! SMBTS has been written (so far), chronologically, with the exception of their reunion (also in chapter ten). I started with when they first met, then progressed through their budding relationship, until the point where communication was lost, then started writing how they make it back together. It's just posted in the wonky way I've posted it with the past/present thing going on in every chapter.

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

This one isn't too dialogue heavy, and I haven't written them being too snarky with one another because they're a little older in the fic and I wanted to wear that down a little. This is an upcoming bit in chapter eight that I really like:

When Ronan gets a surreptitious photo of a grow operation, like Adam’s phone was slid from his pocket just enough for his camera to take the photo, Ronan calls Adam almost immediately. The call rolls to voicemail, but Adam calls back a short while later. “Sorry, I was finishing a site tour. I’m driving home now so I’m all yours.”

“Was that pot?” Ronan desperately wants to switch the call to FaceTime so he can see the California sun illuminating Adam as he drives.

“It’s called cannabis.” Ronan can hear Adam’s smirk through the phone. “They’re farmers, too. Sometimes they need our help. Usually it’s just the legal team, but I got to tag along this time.”

5: What part was hardest to write?

The part that is hardest to write is getting Ronan the hell out of Ilidorin...

6: What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics?

The structure of it! I really wanted to try something I hadn't seen in a fic, and I hadn't seen anything where there's the backwards-forwards of the timeline chapter-over-chapter. Because it's really not flashbacks, it's the same story happening in two different directions. I described it once as kind of a half-Cloud Atlas, if that makes any sense at all.

[Ask game.]

0 notes

merlieve · 2 years

Note

Oh I'm READY

My request if for our beloved benedict bridgerton

I had to search my brain for something because i really want ben fics but i have 0 creativity

(They're already married in this, since i feel like there's more freedom to write a relationship that way when it comes to the 1800's lol)

Reader's dad had some problems with alcohol so that's something that really scares her and one day reader sees ben drunk, like really really drunk, and she's scared of him (He doesn't do anything to her, he's just louder than normal, but the whole thing is just a trigger to her) and when it's the other day and he's sober again he doesn't understand why she's kind of avoiding him and flinching at his touch

Fluff ending as i love angst with fluff in the end <3

ultraviolence :: benedict bridgerton x reader

Fem! Reader

(She/Her)

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

[ Note: the title has nothing to do with benedict, i just thought of ultraviolence by lana del rey while reading that request! And I agree with the marriage thing, LOL. I hope you enjoy this story <3 I tried my best! ]

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Fluff & Angst | Warning/s: Past trauma, mentions of alcohol, toxic father-daughter relationship & yelling.

I do not allow my works to be published on another site, so please check in with me, or at least give credit!

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

(Y/n) fully believes that if you’re married to someone, you shall tell them everything, but in this case, she didn’t want to. It was something she always kept at the back of her brain, along with the rest of the memories of her father. Her father was an alcoholic, even if (Y/n) loathed to admit it, he was. He would go gambling with his friends from work and start drinking in the process.

He wasn’t a friendly drunk, the total opposite, he would yell at her mama for the tiniest things, and occasionally, even (Y/n) herself. It scarred her for the rest of her life, it’s what made her susceptible to shouting. What she didn’t expect was her spouse to come home intoxicated himself.

“(Y/n), I am h-home!” Slurred Benedict, he had just arrived home from Lady Danbury’s ball, (Y/n) came home earlier than Benedict, she insisted on him to stay since he was reconciling with old companions. Hearing upon Benedict’s arrival, (Y/n) rushed downstairs to his aid, only to find Benedict stumbling as he stepped, using the wall to keep him from falling flat on the floor. “Oh, my - what happened?” Whispered (Y/n), looking at Benedict with worried eyes, walking to aid him instantly.

While she was waiting for his response, Benedict was struggling to form words, laughing at himself in the process. “When you left for the ball, you’ll never guess who came – you’ll never guess who came…” It seemed Benedict did not know he repeated the same thing, that’s what made (Y/n) giggle a bit.

“LORD GRANVILLE and Lord WETHERBY! When was the last time we visited them? Well, whenever that occurred… we OWE THEM a visit,” Laughed Benedict, he seemed to not notice the volume of his voice got higher than expected. “Ben, may you lower your voice a little? We shall not alarm the housekeepers…” But (Y/n)’s feeble attempt to get Benedict to lower his voice backfired, as it only made him louder. “I cannot HEAR you! My head is ACHING!” Stammered Benedict, as he closed his eyes in hopes it would ease the pain.

(Y/n) cannot focus on Benedict, he never came home drunk like this. It only reminded her of her father, he would always shout at (Y/n) for ruining his life, and that he had many choices but he was obligated to stay with her mother because of her, and he would wake up and pretend he had never said such hateful things to his daughter. The thought brought tears into her eyes, but she decided not to worry Benedict enough.

Benedict resumed to chatter, the neighbours presumably have heard his laughter as the housekeepers woke up and assisted you to carry him to your shared bedroom. “You must not worry about me, I’ll be sleeping in the guest bedroom tonight,” (Y/n) sent a fake smile on their way, as they scattered to prepare the bedroom for their lady. “W-what? There’s no need!” Gasped Benedict as he tried getting up, only to be greeted by a familiar pounding in his head, as he winced. “Goodnight, Benedict,” Told (Y/n), as she closed the door before Benedict could utter a word.

It was the morning after the incident, (Y/n) didn’t know she cried herself to sleep, reminiscing memories of her father. The events of last night stormed their way into her mind as she sighed, she can not face her husband again, she shan’t, the urge of breaking down was an option in that scenario. She got ready for the day ahead of her while making sure she avoided him. When Benedict woke up the first thing he noticed was the lack of his lovely wife’s presence beside him… also the slight pounding on his head, but his wife was his priority.

“Ah! I see you have awakened, Sir,” Benedict’s butler greeted him. “Daniel, where is (Y/n)? It is five in the morning,” Groaned Benedict, as he tried to sit up but his vision started getting blurry. “She’s eating her meal, my Lord” Benedict stayed in bed for three minutes to ease the pain, his mind trying to recall the memories of last night, but only remembering his wife leaving the ball early and chatting with old friends. “Do you remember what time I came home last night, Daniel?” Asked Benedict. “You came home at precisely - 1:25 AM, my Lord,”

Oh, god, (Y/n) was presumably mad at him for staying up after midnight, she always waits for Benedict to wake up, not to mention, how cold the other side of the bed is. Benedict got prepared for luncheon, and pranced to the dining hall, in hopes of seeing his charming wife. When he got inside, (Y/n) was already done with her meal, he greeted her, but once he walked towards her, she flinched, ��W-what did she flinch?’ Benedict thought, but before he could talk to his wife, she left, swearing he heard her sniffle.

The whole afternoon, (Y/n) ignored Benedict’s endeavour in making her notice him, it was pathetic from an outsider’s outlook. She knew she can’t disregard her husband forever, but she needed her space, she didn’t want to open up to Benedict either, in her eyes, talking about it will make the situation worse, or would it not? (Y/n) slowly walked towards their shared bedroom, she hesitated to open the door – after five minutes of standing there, she decided it was time, the door opening caught her off guard, she looked up at the figure who opened the door, and there her husband was.

“Hello-” Stated Benedict, clearing his throat in the process. “Hi, Benedict… err - so you may have noticed I’ve been avoiding you…” Exclaimed (Y/n), though she was quickly cut off by Benedict. “So, she speaks,” He joked. “Look, Benedict, I haven’t told you things, personal things. I don’t know how to start this…” It was pathetic, she already had tears in her eyes. “It’s alright, my love, take your time,” Smiled Benedict, as he placed his hands on her shoulders, slowly massaging them to help her explain.

“You came home late last night, drunk, and it bothered me because I haven’t told you about something I’m ashamed off – my father would come home, drunken, and I’ll save you time by saying, he wasn’t a nice drunk. He would yell at my mother and me for the tiniest things. F-for example, I told him I had no intentions of marrying one of his acquaintances, and he hit me, it wasn’t like it was the first time but… that made me aware of who he was. And when you came home drunk last night and started yelling, I kind of got reminded of him,” (Y/n) felt ashamed for telling him this way, but she missed her husband, and her husband missed her too.

“Oh, why didn’t you tell me beforehand? Darling, I love you, I wouldn’t do such foul improper things to you. What could I do to help you feel better?” Asked Benedict, he felt bad he reminded her of such a person, primarily her father. Benedict truly adored his wife, he was his inspiration, his muse, and the love of his life. “You could make it up to me by spending the evening with me,” Grinned (Y/n), as she looked at Benedict with only love in her eyes, and he seemed to share the same.

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

Masterlist

•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••

#benedict bridgerton #bridgerton #benedict bridgerton x reader #bridgerton netflix #luke thompson #luke thompson x reader #bridgerton x reader #bridgerton icons #benedict x you #benedict bridgerton drabble #benedict bridgerton imagine #benedict bridgerton x reader angst #merlieve’s fics ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

454 notes · View notes

sweetnsinfull · 2 years

Text

Pet | S. Hanma x Reader|

⪀Pairing: S, Hanma x F!Reader

⪀Word Count:

⪀Summary: College is expensive. Everyone jokes about wanting a sugar daddy, but the last thing you expected when you signed up for a dating site was to become Hanma Shuji's personal pet.

⪀Rating: Explicit

⪀Genre: Porn with a teensy bit of plot.

⪀Warnings: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. This fic is extremely dark and fucked up. If you are sensitive to dub-con (kind of noncon vibes), drug usage, kidnapping, knife play, mentions of human trafficking, unwilling pet play, 1 mention of animal abuse, extremely rough sex, or asphyxiation, this is not the fic for you. It is intentionally dark and depraved to match the collab it is a part of. You have been forewarned.

⪀AN: This is my part for the Cumminity's Tender and Taboo collab! It is pretty dark and I have rewritten this like 5 times trying to get it just right lol.

DISCLAIMER: All of the characters I write for are aged up. Thanks!

Winters in Shibuya were normally rough. A heavy blanket of snow had fallen over the streets during the day, causing traffic jams you could see from the high-rise apartment windows. That had to be why Hanma was not home yet. He was never late. On weekdays like today, he strolled through the door around 9PM, hung his coat by the door, and kicked his shoes off. He expected you to be waiting by the door, head lowered, on your knees, with dinner hot on the table. Not lukewarm, not just out of the microwave, freshly made and recently plated. You’d learned that the hard way.

Still, you lifted your head for just a second to peer at the clock by the door. 9:15. The snow must’ve slowed him down. For a second you thought about what else could have happened. Maybe he was dead. Maybe he’d finally pissed off the right person and they’d shot him in cold blood. Maybe he slipped and fell, and hit his head on the pavement. Maybe he finally overdosed. The thoughts that raced through your mind ground to a screeching halt at a very familiar sound from the other side of the door. Your head snapped down, eyes anxiously tracing imaginary patterns in the fibers of the dark gray carpet.

Keys. You’d memorized the sound his keys made when they jingled, fresh out of his coat pocket. He was home. Not dead. Alive.

You were not free.

Hanma did not greet you when he first stepped in the door. In the early days of your servitude to him, he would do something to you when he came home, under the guise of needing to let out a bit of steam. He’d smack you around a bit. Grab you by the chin and spit into your mouth. He loved to shove his gun in your face, reminding you that he alone held your life in his hands. Something about the way you trembled in fear or the tears that flowed down your face as you tried and failed, to swallow sob after sob got to him. These days very few people got the privilege of seeing Hanma’s wild, sadistic grin, but watching you suffer turned him on greatly. By the time you were bruised and bloody, or shaking like a fucking chihuahua, Hanma’s dick was hard and pulsating against the zipper of his dress slacks.

“Welcome home.” You greeted, annunciating so he can hear you well. Mumbling had earned you a beating more than once, and it had not taken you long to wise up to the no mumbling rule.

“Get up.” He ordered simply, toeing his shoes off and nodding toward the black, leather loafers. “Put these away. Wait for me in the kitchen.”

You stood, avoiding eye contact as you followed through with his instructions, leaving his snow-dusted dress shoes on a tray to avoid a water puddle when it melted and heading quickly to the kitchen where you kneeled next to an empty pair of dog dishes. Seeing them made you feel sick, embarrassed that at one point, the man had you eating dog kibble from these bowls. The salty, bland, food had somehow sustained you, despite how much you wanted to throw it up. When he entered, Hanma eyed the counters first. Clean. He checked to make sure you cleaned and put the dishes away from breakfast and then eyed the spread on the table. Tempura. He prodded it with two fingers, pulling them away to check for grease. While he didn’t show it, he was sure his tardiness to dinner would have caused the meal to be ice cold.

“I’m impressed. Dinner is not cold or greasy this time.” He sat a hand on your head, ruining the hair you had taken so much time to perfect for him. “Good girl.” There it is. Hanma was not generous with his praise, but if everything was satisfactory when he came home, he gave you the same reward as a dog. A pet on the head, and muttered words of praise. Hanma took a moment to peer into your bowl at the steaming white rice and a few pieces of plain short rib. “Go on then. Eat.” He commanded.

And you do. Head leaned forward past the lip of your pink dog bowl, you do your best to suckle the meat into your mouth. It’s tough, and not all that flavorful since you were not the one to cook it. Hanma sourced all of your food from a local business that he had loaned money to, that produced all natural, fresh pet food. The thought that someone’s prissy little lap dog was eating the exact same meal as you made your stomach turn.

It just furthered the truth.

You were Hanma’s lapdog.

And you would be, until he got sick of you and pawned you off onto one of his friends, or killed you. Whichever came first.

The first day he brought you into his home, you saw what happened to people he was done with. Another woman, probably your age, maybe even younger, was splayed out on the kitchen floor. It was obvious she was dead, her eyes clouded over, staring straight up at the ceiling. A pool of blood made a halo around where her head hit the ground with a single, gaping gunshot wound to the forehead. The smell alone made bile rise into your throat. As if sensing your disgust, Hanma had grabbed you by the back of the head and hovered you only inches from her dead, wide open eyes.

“This is what happens to girls who don’t listen. Do you know what she did?” He’d asked, voice low and menacing. A grin spread across his face. “She tried to kill me. Thought she could get a knife through my back while I was on a call. You will never get that chance, do you hear me?” He reveled in the way your skin paled, eyes averted, as you swallowed vomit that threatened to bubble up in your throat. Hanma had let you go and forced you to sit on the floor while he undid a collar from around her neck. “Chin up, slut.” As soon as your head tilted up towards the ceiling, he clasped the leather around your neck. It smelled, the leather still sticky with her blood, but he didn’t seem to care. Leaning in, he found your gaze, lips curled up in a snarl. “Step out of line and you’ll get a nice little shock. Be my good, pretty little pet, and maybe, I’ll let you live for a little while.”

The receiver clicked against the outer edge of the bowl as your tongue collected individual grains of white rice. It was not enough to keep you full. It never was. You sat back, unsatisfied, and waited for Hanma to start eating his own food. Occasionally he’d raise his phone to his ear or quickly tap on the screen to send what you assumed was a text. He’d snuck a few peeks at you while you ate, and it was starting to rile him up a bit, though he dared not show it. Hanma did not allow panties or bras, and he kept you in skin tight, low cut t shirts, and short skirts so he could watch your tits bounce, or eye your hairless pussy while you bent over to eat. To him, he deserved it.

After all, you were nothing more than a stupid animal.

His stupid little pet.

Finished with his meal, Hanma stood up and wiped his hand on a napkin, only to discard it by throwing it in your face. “I’m going to shower. Have you washed your pussy?” A nod. “Do you need to go to the bathroom?” You held in a sigh, knowing that the auction would earn you some sort of nasty punishment. Getting permission to piss was so stupid. You nod again. He leaned forward, slender fingers curled beneath the leather and pinching some of your skin under blunt nails. You tried your best to keep up with his long strides, palms scraping the carpet and adding a sickening red burn. Hanma kicked the door open and nudged you towards a pile of pale blue puppy pads he forced you to use. There was something disgustingly dehumanized about having to squat in front of the man to relieve yourself that had you gritting your teeth.

“Go on then.” he released you and pushed you towards it with his foot. This would never not be humiliating. Begrudgingly, you crawled towards it and hiked up your skirt. Over time you had mastered the ability to perch on the balls of your feet, angling your hips away from you as you pissed. Of course, he watched, looking bored as he leaned against the sink. His half lidded eyes darted between your bare pussy, and the growing, yellow patch on the pad beneath you. Normally he called you disgusting. Made some sort of joke about how you look like a dog he tortured as a kid. But tonight he was ominously silent, the only sound in the room a sharp hissing as you piss in front of him. When your stream tapered off, he tossed you a strip of toilet paper and promptly kicked you out with an order to get the kitchen cleaned by the time his shower is done.

Since his showers usually took an hour, that gave you more than enough time to get the dinner dishes washed, dried, and put away. Leftovers went into a bowl in the fridge, prepped for a freezing cold breakfast that would be dumped into your dog bowl before Hanma left for work. Table wiped, and floor still glistening and wet, you sat outside of the bathroom door to wait. For a second your mind wanders to how easy it would be to open the door and kill him. He’s defenseless in the shower, his gun and the remote for the shock collar sitting on the marble countertop, out of his reach. You could easily turn the handle, reach for it, and shoot him through the curtain…but the image of the woman who came before you splayed out on his kitchen floor, and the memory of scrubbing her blood from the white tile for hours with a toothbrush gives you pause. If you attempt and fail, not only will Hanma kill you without hesitation, another starving college student will be plucked from the college campus nearby and put into your place. Forced to cook, clean, and satisfy Hanma, until she either makes the same mistake, takes her own life, or tries to flee. From what you overheard from Hanma’s goons, the girl before you had it so much worse…the only thing waiting for you on the other side of that door, was a life of being a corporate pawn, anyway. After years of living under Hanma, there was no hope for a real life. No one would want a woman whose pussy had been used day in and day out by a maniac, and who inevitably had severe PTSD from said experiences.

He’d ruined you.

A sudden yank of your hair drew you out of your thoughts. Hanma was right in front of you, bent over so you both are face to face. He had your hair in one of his hands, forcing you to stare up at him. “When I call you, you come. Do you understand, bitch?” He hisses, droplets of water sliding down dark tendrils of hair, and splattering on your face.

“Yes sir.” You croaked, biting your tongue. The reality hit you like a freight train. No matter what you did, you would always belong to Hanma, all because you’d gone on one of those stupid sugar daddy websites, tired of eating ramen and spending every last time on college. One decision, one click of a mouse had decided your fate before you’d even had a chance to realize your mistake. And thus you’d be paying for it, for the rest of your life.

“Get in the tub. You stink.” He tugged you by your hair towards the bathroom, only letting you go so you could crawl towards the tub. Quickly, you removed your clothes and did as you were told, head angled downward as he turned the water on. The sensation of hot water makes you jolt. It was always ice cold, and yet today, Hanma had seemingly chosen to spare you that discomfort.

What a gentleman.

Once you’re soaked, Hanma washed your hair in fruity shampoo and scrubbed your body with soap that smelled too expensive to be wasted on you, but then again, every day he made sure you wore deodorant and perfume. He’d made a joke about not wanting his house to smell like a dog, but you really felt it was something he used to feel in control, more than anything.

Once you're cleaned, he stepped aside and watched as you climbed out, still on all fours obediently. He enveloped you with a towel, another strange behavior, and wiped you down with it, hands oddly gentle as he stroked your body. Normally he’d just let you drip dry, or worse, he’d make you rub yourself all over his carpet to get the water off.

“Come on. I have something I want done.” Hanma husked, missing his usual venom as he spoke to you. In his lavish bedroom, Hanma did not dole out a worn t-shirt for bed. Instead, he pointed to his sheets and told you to lay down. Even with a crimson towel around his waist, you could tell he was rock hard, his cock straining against the confines of the absorbent red fabric. Obediently, you laid down on your back, damp hair cold against your back. To your surprise, Hanma reached for a bottle of scented lotion and rubbed his hands up and over your body. You hated the way your nerves tingled for him, body coming alive under his touch. His long fingers grazed over your pert nipples every now and again, sending hot zips of pleasure racing down your spine. Alarm bells go off in the logical part of your brain. This should not feel good. You should not want him to do it again. Your clit should not be engorged and pulsing between your legs.

In an instant, your brain flashes back to an intro to psychology class, where you’d first learned about Stockholm Syndrome. Every part of your being fought against the concept. You did not love Hanma. He called you names, made you eat out of a dog dish, made you pee on puppy pads while he watched, and yanked you by your hair when he wanted something and you were too slow to respond. And yet, as his hands parted your legs and the pad of his thumb kissed your clit, you whine, head tilting backward.

That is how he knew he won.

“Good girl. Such a good girl for me.” He purred, tongue darting out to dampen thin lips. His fingers are like magic. How, between the abuse and sexual assault of so many other women, had Shuji Hanma learned to use his hands like this? How had he figured out just where to touch, to make you whimper and writhe against the sheets for him. This wasn’t fair at all.

“Are you daddy’s pet?” the way he says your name as your stomach coiling in knots. Thighs trembling you begrudgingly mumbled a reply.

“Yes sir.” You managed, voice wavering as he pinched the bundle of nerves between two fingers. Your heart thundered in your chest, back arching from the sheets. Normally, Hanma was rough and to the point. He didn’t bother with touching you and trying to make you feel good. It was all about him. All about him pumping your cute little cunt full of his cum, or splattering it across your face. Ownership. Deep down, what really got him off was your duty to him. No different than a stupid, ignorant, dog, you’d follow him to the ends of the earth if he told you to. And that was what really made his cock twitch. You were his and his alone. No one would ever fuck your pussy the way he did. They would never get to see you like you are now, writhing and moaning, head thrown backward.

He owned you. Every single part of you. You needed him. And that was what he always wanted in a pet.

“That’s it.” He cooed, curving his wrist to slide three fingers into you. When you cried out from the sudden intrusion, he simply shushed you, pumping the digits as he watched your eyes roll back in your head. “I bet this feels so good, doesn’t it?” As much as you hated to admit it, you can feel an orgasm growing in the pit of your stomach, so close you can almost taste it. “Beg. If you want to cum, a good girl always begs.”

“Please, Hanma. Please. I need it. I want it.” Hanma gave a dissatisfied shake of his head. His fingers began to slow in a wordless threat. “Need it so bad. Want to cum. Please. I want to cum.”

“And what’s in it for me?” He questioned, head tilted just a tad. That sadistic smile had returned again and that was not something you wanted to see while you were on the edge, tilting so close to falling into the oblivion of pleasure. “Will you be on your best behavior tonight? Will you let me ruin you?” You bobbed your head frantically, head too far up in the clouds to really pay his words much attention. He’d already ruined you. One more orgasm would be nothing.

“Anything. Anything.” You stuttered, gripping his sheets in your hands. It was right there. So close.

“Alright. You asked for it.” He returned to thumbing your clit, continuing to stretch your pussy with three fingers again. Suddenly you tense, mouth opening in an ‘o’. Hanma grinned harder, feeling your orgasm finally erupt. Your walls clenched violently around his digits and your chest heaved out quick, rushed breaths, making your tits bounce ever so slightly. He just can’t help himself. Hanma spits directly into your mouth, then rears his hand back and smacks you hard across the face. The sudden, stinging, hot sensation on your cheek, combined with your earth shattering orgasm made you whimper, tears filling your eyes. It’s too much. Caught off guard, you shed tears for the first time in what feels like months. Salty drops of water trail over your chin, and leak into your mouth where your lips are parted.

Hanma let out a breathy little laugh and pulled his fingers from your cunt with a pleased little hum. He drug your cum all over your body, leaving long streaks of it across your tits and your belly, marking you with your own release. “Atta girl. Daddy’s smart little girl. What would Mikey say right now if he saw you here, covered in your own cum and whining like a needy slut?” He asked, head tilted. The sound of your ex’s name casually rolling off of Hanma’s tongue made your heart drop into your stomach. How did he know Mikey? And why was he bringing him up now? You had been gone for years, right? What did it matter what Mikey thought? He had probably assumed you were dead, mourned your death, and moved on, right?. No one paid attention to missing person cases after a few months. Hanma had kept a calendar on the fridge, though sometimes you forgot to peek at it. Both 2021 and 2022 were long gone. It was December of 2023 right?

Right?

Taking in your wide eyed expression, Hanma shook his head. “I can see those little gears turning in that pretty little head. Don’t you worry about that. I’m going to make him a beautiful gift and send it to him. Won’t that be nice?” Before you can even register what he’d said, Hanma was up and exiting the bedroom. Thoughts ricocheted around your mind as you tried to think through the post orgasm brain fog. Mikey. He knows Mikey. You two had been dating since freshman year, but you couldn’t think of a connection between the two men. While Mikey had offered you money before, you had never taken it. The sugar daddy thing had been a secret, at least as far as you knew. Why did he feel the need to send him some sort of gift that would remind him of you? Wouldn’t that just prove that not only were you alive, but Hanma had also you caged in his house and kept you here for two years? Wouldn’t that get him caught? Wouldn’t that be counterproductive?

“Here. I bet you’re thirsty after that. Why don’t you have a drink?” Hanma thrust a clear glass into your palm. Water. You tipped the glass back and gulped down the entire thing, mouth dry from the sudden mention of your ex. Speaking without being spoken to was forbidden, which meant you couldn’t ask your captor any clarifying questions. Your eyes watched Hanma set up his phone on a tripod before he moved to his closet, coming out with a familiar box of sex toys. Great. He left an anal plug, a leash, a roll of silver duct tape, and a gag on the black sheets before he shifted off of the mattress to press play. He tugged your collar close and whispered in your ear. “Go ahead. Tell Mikey hello.”

You swallowed deeply, that familiar nauseated feeling returning with a vengeance. “Hi, Mikey.” You murmured, goosebumps spreading across your arms and legs at the mere utterance of a name you haven’t said in what feels like years. Hanma choked out a dark little chuckle and turned your face towards the camera.

“Why didn’t you tell me you had such a pretty little girlfriend?” he asked, leaning in to slam his lips against yours, in a kiss that you know will leave your lips swollen and sore come tomorrow. When he pulled away, there was a glint in his eyes that made your heart clench painfully. Hanma wastes no time tugging your arms behind your back and binding your hands with the silver tape. He tied the gag behind your head, forcing your lips apart. You tried your best to swallow, but drool leaked past the corners of your lips, trailing down your chin and dripping onto the sheets.

“Drooling, just like a dog. Seems you do know your place.” He crooned, lips twitched up in a pleased smirk. A thumb caressed your temple and slid down the apex of your chin as Hanma muttered how beautiful and helpless you looked, all bound and gagged. With one swift motion, he easily manhandled you onto your belly and tucks your knees close to your chest. You hated anal. Everything about it felt like an immoral intrusion you’d never consented to. You’d grit your teeth were it not for the plastic ball keeping your mouth open. Instead, you dig your blunt nails into your palms, as Hanma used a dot of lube and started stuffing your hole full, in direct view of the camera. The small amount of the viscous lubricant is not nearly enough, and you sniveled into the sheets at the intense stretching and scorching sensation.

“You see her asshole, Mikey? See how she is stretched open so good for me?” He asked, clearly enjoying how much this hurt you. Finally, the base settles between your cheeks. Even though it was inside, somehow it still felt as if it was still moving and burying itself deeper inside of you.

Suddenly your head started to swim. The pain became dull in the back of your mind, instead replaced by an uncanny feeling of false euphoria. Something blocked any further logical thought, leaving your body feeling weightless and your brain blank. Hanma flipped you onto your back and spread your legs. He’d set up the camera at the perfect angle to catch the drunk expression on your face, and he reveled in the way one of your eyes had already started to droop shut.

Twice, he smacks your cheek, just enough to get your cloudy eyes focused on him. “Don’t you look perfect?” He hummed, glowering down at you. No matter how much you wanted to control your limbs, you just couldn’t. No amount of strength keeps your legs from toppling over like a newborn deer.

“Poor thing, you’re so helpless. You need someone to take care of you, don’t you? Stupid fucking dog.” Hanma spits on your shaved pussy and spanks your clit, hard. The sudden stimulation has your eyes rolling, and a muffled groan making its way around the ball gag. “I’m going to breed you. Have my little bitch stuffed full and fat with my babies? You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Want me to make you a mommy, stupid whore? You’d look stunning with your tits full of milk.” There is no way you could get pregnant. Hanma kept you on a strict regimen of birth control pills, so he was free to use your pussy as a cum dumpster, without any of the repercussions. That was your job, after all. To be used by him until you made a big enough mistake to be killed.

You were a means to an end. Nothing more than an object.

Jolts of electric current raced up and down your neurons, sparking fireworks in your brain as Hanma spread your lips for the camera. Finally, he shoved his towel off of his hips, letting his cock spring free. Did you really hate him? The question made bile rise in your throat, as you eyed the way his long fingers encircled his cock and jerked it a few times.

“Look at her. Look at how wet she is for me. You see that?” He asks, collecting some of your slick on the pads of his fingers, and showing them to the camera how your desperate little hole flutters around nothing. “She lives for her daddy’s cock, don’t you?” Hanma teased. He always teased you. The tip of his cock pressed between your lower lips, just enough for your hole to open, suck him in, and drool for him before he pulls away again. Your hips tried to chase the feeling, which only made Hanma sneer. He grabbed you by the chin and forced your barely focusing eyes on him again.

“You love me. Don’t you? You love and need this cock to survive. I am everything you’ve ever wanted. I’m all you will ever want and need.” He took a moment to tug the ball from between your lips. “Say it.”

“Need it.” You slurred, finally swallowing a mouth full of spit. “You. Need…want you. Do anything. Will do…please, Shuji, want you to fuck me.” It came out in more of a whine than you intended it to, but god do you wish he would hurry the fuck up. “Love you.” You croaked, finally giving him what he really wanted.

Hanma’s resolve broke at those simple little words. He shoved you back against the sheets again and promptly hiked your legs up and over his shoulders. He lined himself up with your leaking cunt. You tensed, waiting for it with bated breath. All at once, he shoved himself in. Hanma did not have a huge cock, but what he lacked in size, he made up for with a slight curve of his shaft, and an innate ability to know just how you wanted to be fucked. As his hips rolled, he set up a brutal pace. Somehow, over the sounds of wet skin meeting over and over in a rhythmic slap slap slap, you moaned, head tossed back and eyes screwed shut. Colors burst behind your eyes every time the head of his cock rubbed against the spongy bundle of nerves inside of you.

“Such a tight pussy.” He grunted, teeth-gnashing as he slammed into you over and over again, his dark eyes flickering over your body bouncing against the mattress. “I’ve fucked this pussy so many times, I’ve molded you into the perfect cock sleeve.” He bragged, watching your eyes roll. Holding onto consciousness seemed so much harder now that he was so deep inside of you.

“Ah ah.” Hanma chided, smacking your cheeks when your eyes closed, and watching the way they struggled to focus. He quickly became nothing more than a hazy shape above you, glasses slightly askew. “At least cum for me before you pass out. Wanna feel you cum.” A hand snuck between your legs and you gasped, eyes widening when he found your clit and thrums it just right. You whimpered, rocking awkwardly into him and squirming. This orgasm feels different. Stronger. Something about not having a clear lock on your senses just makes the sharp, sudden pleasure coursing through your veins more potent. Mouth wide open and pupils two times their size, you shuddered, nerves on fire and brain going into overdrive to keep you conscious.

“Look at you.” Hanma murmured, flicking your clit and watching your body seize up. “So close, aren’t you? Why don’t you fall apart for me?”

The world tilted all of a sudden. Your head found Hanma’s shoulder after he hoisted you back up onto his thighs. The new angle is jarring. All at once, your body thrums when his tip slams into your cervix. You suck in a breath so quickly, you’re sure your heart is going to stop beating. Lungs aching, your lips parted in a silent scream. One little kiss to your cervix is all that it took to cause you to cum, slick coating his cock and running down the inside of your thighs. Hanma fucks you through it, groaning at the feeling of your release collecting on the tops of his thighs as you cream on his cock.

“Good girl. Good fucking bitch.” His eyes found the place where you’ve left cum in his pubes, and a ring of it encircling his length. His large hands found purchase on your hips as he lifted you up and slammed into you with no abandon. Occasionally you whine or gurgle, but it only takes a couple seconds for the world to go dark. When he realized you’d passed out, Hanma pushed you backward again and fucked you deeply, head tossed backward. Something about fucking your unconscious body makes fireworks go off in his head. That sick, depraved grin crossed his face again as he held your hips in his hands and surged inside of you one more time before he finally filled you with rope after rope of cum.

The first thing you felt when you came to was a horrible pulsating in your head. You’re not on the stupid little dog bed you normally slept on. In fact, you aren’t sure where you are. You sat up and rubbed at your temples for a moment, trying to remember what happened last night. There are deep red ligature marks along the skin of your wrist, and a slight stickiness, that pulled a foggy memory of someone blond tugging silver tape from your skin. You eyed the dark sheets for a moment, cringing at the burning pain deep in your pussy. You slipped a hand under the sheets, and surely enough, your lips were dangerously puffy, and your skin was still sticky with someone's cum.

A soft snore tore you away from your assessment of the damage from the night before. It’s Hanma, sleeping next to you peacefully. In a moment of clarity, you considered finding his gun and ending it, right here, right now. It would be easy to get a knife from the kitchen or fish around his office drawers for a gun.

The thought of killing him made you tremble. Hanma worked for someone even more terrifying than he was. A blond, with wicked eyes who kicked you in the thigh, hard enough to knock you over when Hanma had him over for dinner. Somewhere in the deep recesses of your mind, you recall him telling Hanma you needed a muzzle and yanking you up by your hair. Not only that, he had a handful of associates who were equally as terrifying. If you somehow succeeded in killing him, you would paint a target on your back for god knows how long. There would be no escape. There was no life without Hanma.

You sighed and tugged the sheets up around you.

You are, and forever will be, nothing more than his pet.

805 notes · View notes

fanficshiddles · 3 years

Text

My Sweet Rose, Chapter 1

From the imagine on imagine-Loki here.

Summary: Rosie got a job working at The Avengers tower with her cousin, Pepper. She’s only been there a week when Loki comes live there, to make up for his past deeds in New York. But this brings a lot of problems for Rosie.

Loki was her Daddy Dom. Who vanished one day without a word, leaving her completely broken and lost.

Note: Daddy/little dynamic & Flashbacks will be in Bold. I’m not sure how long this story will be, I’m thinking no more than 5 chapters though. But I saw the imagine and omg I love it, had to do something with it. Haven’t written anymore of it yet but just HAD to share the first chapter so far, oops! lol.

Rosie had been working and living in the Avengers tower for a week now, it was going really well. And it was helping to keep her mind occupied, getting her back on her feet after such a rough year.

She was a PA for Stark, and the other Avengers if they needed anything too. It was helping her cousin, Pepper out a lot. As Stark was very demanding nowadays and the others were becoming that way too.

It was also good for Rosie. She’d had a really tough year. She met someone a few years ago in a BDSM club, it had been her first time there after spending months building up the courage to go. She was a little, and had been wanting to find someone that she could feel safe with to explore that side of her.

She met a man, who was charming and handsome. Kind, funny. They fell in love, or so she thought anyway. He was the perfect Daddy Dom for her, teaching her everything and looking after her. She adored and loved him so much. Which is why when one day he just vanished, it was all the harder for her.

He just never returned after saying he had to go home to visit his family, who lived in Iceland apparently. But he did that regularly and always returned to her. But not that time. To say she was heartbroken when there was not even a call or a text from him explaining why was an understatement.

His name was Loki. And it became clear what happened a few months later after his disappearance, she saw him on the news. Loki, the God Of Mischief, was trying to take over the world. She couldn’t believe it and thought she was dreaming when she realised it had was her Loki. He looked different in the heavy armour, he looked scary.

But she thought no wonder he left her, he was a God and a Prince after all. What would he have wanted with her in the first place anyway?

She had tried a couple of times to date someone else, but never made it past the first date. As they just… weren’t him. No matter how often she tried to just forget about him. It was difficult.

She’d fallen into a downward spiral, not even able to go to work. So she had lost her job and was on benefits for a while. She became really anxious and nervous.

But here, in the tower, she was trying to turn herself around again. It had been one man, even if he had been her first true love, in her heart anyway. She knew she would heal, in time. Even if it had been over a year.

Rosie had been so engrossed in sorting out some paperwork for Tony that she never noticed the newcomer coming into the kitchen. She barely even registered Thor introducing her to him. ‘This is Rosie, our PA, she’s new here.’

Not until she heard an all too familiar voice responding that sent shivers down her spine and sent her heart racing.

‘Rosie… My sweet Rose?’

There was only one person who had ever called her that.

Slowly she looked up, eyes widening, standing before her was Loki.

‘Oh my sweet Rose, you’ve done Daddy so proud.’ Loki purred gently as he cradled her in his lap.

She felt so safe and secure, curled up against him as he wrapped a blanket around her naked body. Knowing how cold she always got after they’d played together quite so intensely.

Loki rocked her back and fore softly as he ran his fingers through her hair, soothing her. She was trembling a bit after her orgasms, Loki had pushed her almost past her limit, but he knew. He always knew when to stop at the right time.

He was an intense Daddy, and could be really strict at times. But he was fair and ever so kind. He had his goofy moments and was extremely playful too, which she loved. He was never angry with her, always calm and collected. Even when she misbehaved, not that that happened often.

She clung to his shirt so tightly, never wanting to let go. Loki had to carefully remove her hand from his shirt just so he could change them into a different position, getting them both under the blanket so he could have her snuggled up next to him. He knew she would fall asleep soon.

‘Daddy.’ She whispered quietly, sounding so vulnerable.

‘Yes, my little one?’ Loki asked, engulfing her small hand in his large one.

‘Can you sing to me?’

Loki smiled. ‘Of course, my sweetling.’

He began singing to her in Asgardian, but he had told her before it was Icelandic. She had no reason not to believe him, especially since he told her he’d grown up there with his parents.

But he had a beautiful voice, she always loved to hear him sing.

She felt so loved as he she drifted off to sleep to the sound of his voice. She faintly remembered a gentle kiss on her forehead just before she fell asleep.

Thor was confused at their interaction, especially as Rosie said nothing at first. Just stared at Loki in utter disbelief.

‘No…’ She shook her head and took a step backwards. ‘You… You don’t get to call me that anymore.’ She said quietly, her voice trembling as tears came to her eyes.

‘Rosie? What’s wrong, did he hurt you?’ Clint asked upon seeing the reaction.

Rosie grabbed the pile of paperwork off the table beside her and she ran off out of the kitchen, with tears falling down her face.

Clint turned to Loki. ‘You’ve got some explaining to do.’ He snapped at him.

‘I have nothing to explain to you, Hawk.’ Loki snarled.

Natasha and Pepper saw Rosie running out of the kitchen in floods of tears, they ran after her into her room. Natasha managed to grab the door before it closed on them.

‘Rosie? Rosie, what’s wrong?’ They both asked as they rushed in to her.

Rosie threw the papers on her bed and she started pacing back and fore, shaking and crying with her arms wrapped around herself. Pepper grabbed her and pulled her down to sit on the bed.

‘Rosie, please speak to us.’ She pleaded with her cousin as Natasha sat at the other side of her.

‘It… It’s him…’ She sobbed.

‘Who? Loki? Did he scare you? I told him not to be an asshole to anyone.’ Natasha said angrily.

‘He… He’s the one. Who I dated before.’ She blurted out, making Pepper and Natasha go silent in shock.

‘But… how?’ Pepper asked.

‘I met him one night in a club. And we dated for eleven months. I was in love with him, utterly and completely. I thought he was with me too. But then he just vanished and never came back one day. Then a few months later, I saw him on the TV… I didn’t tell anyone it was him, because I thought no one would believe me anyway. And what did it matter? It wouldn’t change anything.’ Rosie blurted out between crying.

‘Oh, Rosie. I wish you had told me.’ Pepper pulled her into a hug and cradled her head against her. ‘It’s ok, shhh, shhh. It’s going to be ok.’

Natasha rubbed her back softly. ‘If we had known, we would have warned you he was coming here. I’m so sorry.’

Rosie shook her head and wiped her eyes with her sleeve. ‘No… It’s my fault, I should have told you. I just… it’s a shock to see him face to face.’

Natasha and Pepper nodded in understanding.

They stayed with her for a little while, then when she told them she was ok and was going to take a shower before bed, they left her to it.

But it ended up being the longest shower ever. She kept thinking about Loki and what they had together before.

Kept thinking of when they first met…

Rosie was super nervous when she walked into the BDSM club. But after months of talking herself into it, she finally had the courage to do it.

She didn’t dare tell any of her friends what she was into or what she was doing, perhaps foolish in a way as no one knew where she was. And she was on her own. But she was too embarrassed to tell anyone. Her friends wouldn’t understand.

She relaxed a tiny bit once she was there, noticing other people on their own as well. Getting a few drinks down her helped with her nerves too.

Some of the people she spoke to briefly were really nice. She met a lovely couple at the bar who asked if it was her first time there. They told her if she needed anything to feel free to ask them, not to be shy. That everyone there was really nice and friendly.

There were various demos on that she watched, there was a lot more to some scenes than met the eye. It really made her realise how on sites such as Fetlife and others, it was easy to get sucked into the wanna-be-Dom’s who likely had no idea what they were doing. Or how much safety came into it all.

‘Excuse me, I don’t mean to bother you but I was wondering if you’d like to join me for a drink?’ A beautiful voice came from beside her when one of the demos on aftercare just finished.

Rosie turned and her breath was taken from her as she gazed up at an incredibly tall and handsome man.

‘I… I… Yeah, I would like that, thank you.’ Rosie stammered out, nodding over enthusiastically.

He grinned, showing off his pearly white teeth as he put his hand out towards her. ‘My name is Loki.’ He introduced.

‘I’m Rosie.’ She smiled up at him and put her hand into his. That’s when she noticed his gorgeous hands, so big and he had such long fingers. She blushed hard when he raised her hand up and he kissed the back of it, making her skin tingle like crazy.

‘Pleasure to meet you, Rosie.’ He said charmingly.

Loki gave her his arm and led her over to a free table near the bar. She was really nervous, and Loki could tell. But he soon had her at ease, just chatting away to her calmly and making her laugh almost straight away. She slowly began to relax in his presence.

‘Is this your first time here?’ He asked after buying them both another drink.

‘Is it that obvious?’ She cringed, making him chuckle.

‘Kind of. You did look a bit like a deer in the headlights. But that’s normal for first timers.’ Loki winked at her.

‘So, I’m guessing that means you’ve been here before?’

‘It does.’ He nodded. ‘Not often, it’s probably my fourth visit. Mainly just trying to meet new people, meet anyone that may potentially be interested in a Daddy Dom.’

Rosie’s eyes widened and she suddenly fell shy again as she looked down at her glass and swallowed hard. Loki raised an eyebrow, instantly realising that she was a little. He suspected she was a sub, but hadn’t been sure about the little aspect or not.

Loki leaned forward over the table towards her a little more. ‘Let me take a quick stab in the dark here… But I am presuming that you are a little?’

Her mouth opened and closed again. Then she just opted for nodding in response instead of trusting her voice to actually work.

Loki smiled softly. ‘Nothing to be shy about, sweetheart. That’s why lots of people come to these clubs, to meet their person.’

‘I… I guess so.’ She agreed.

They continued to talk for over an hour, not much about BDSM which Rosie found quite pleasant. He didn’t seem to want to jump straight in so quickly, which in turn made her trust him more and relax.

At the end of the night, Loki handed over a small card with his number on it. ‘There’s absolutely no pressure at all. But I’ve really enjoyed my night with you, Rosie. I would love to take you out on a date, perhaps out for lunch Saturday? But there’s no pressure, I don’t need an answer right now. Just text or call me to let me know. But if I don’t hear from you, that’s ok too. I totally understand.’

Rosie’s heart was racing. Could he get any more considerate? He wasn’t pressuring her at all, not asking for her number. Not even expecting her to contact him if she didn’t want to go on a date with him. Not even needing an answer straight away, what a gentleman.

Loki walked her outside the club and hailed a taxi for her, he even paid in advance for her, not taking no for an answer.

‘I just want to make sure I know you’ll get home safely. And I can’t help it, it’s the protective Daddy in me.’ He shrugged and chuckled, making her giggle shyly.

‘Thank you, Loki.’ She smiled widely at him as she got into the taxi and he closed the door for her once she was in.

He waved her off and she couldn’t stop smiling the whole way home.

Of course, she did text him the following morning to say she would love nothing more than to go on a date with him on Saturday. If that was still what he wanted, too.

Loki replied within a minute, with a time and a place for their first date.

‘How DARE you!’ Pepper roared at Loki and launched for him, slapping him across the face. It barely made him flinch, but he clenched his jaw as he glared at her.

Everyone was surprised at Pepper’s outburst.

‘Woah, what did he do?’ Bruce asked.

‘HE is the one that broke my cousin’s heart. She was head over heels in love with you, asshole. Then you just disappeared on her, left her alone without even an explanation. No note, nothing.’ She snarled at him.

Loki narrowed his eyes at her. ‘Not that it’s any of your business, but I did what was right. To protect her. She was better off without me.’

‘You did NOT do what was right. You have no idea what you’ve put her through this past year, how heartbroken she was. Still is!’ Pepper screeched.

Loki faltered. ‘Still is? Did she not find another, she’s a beautiful, incredible woman. How could she not find ano’

‘You are such a fucking idiot!’ Pepper screeched angrily and so wanted to slap him again, but she knew it was pointless.

The guys around him all put their face into their hands.

‘What?’ Loki asked, looking around.

‘That’s a low blow, man. Not even leaving her a note.’ Said Tony.

‘I… I thought I was doing the right thing.’ Loki said, looking at Thor.

Thor nodded. ‘I did not realise that your Rose was this Rosie… But yes, Loki thought he was doing right by her. He was in love with her, adored her. Never shut up about her. But when he discovered his true heritage on a short visit home, he decided not to go back to her. In fear of hurting her.’ Thor explained.

Pepper ran her hands down her face.

‘Well, you failed on that. You probably hurt her more by not at least saying you were over. You have no idea what she’s been through this last year.’ Pepper shook her head in disgust at Loki.

The team all murmured between them and left the room, leaving Loki with Thor.

For the first time in a long time, Thor saw his real brother back. He saw true emotion on his face again, sorrow and guilt.

‘I… I did not mean to hurt her.’ Loki said, still a bit confused. ‘I loved her, Thor… I do love her. I never stopped thinking about her, never loved another.’ He whispered.

Thor sighed and walked over to him, patting his shoulder. ‘I know, brother. I know.’

Loki thought back to the first time she had called him Daddy. How much it made his heart happy that she trusted and wanted him so much…

Rosie and Loki were snuggling on the sofa together, watching some cartoons that she loved. Loki wasn’t overly fond of them, but it made her happy so he always obliged. He was just happy to have her on his lap, comfortable and relaxed in his arms. Where she belonged.

He was lightly stroking her back underneath her top, making her skin tingle. She was in utter heaven, and Loki couldn’t get enough of just simply touching her. He needed touch in some way, whether he was just holding her hand or had the tips of his fingers on her skin, he needed and craved the intimacy with her.

Loki’s fingers trailed a bit too far to her side and up a little, making her squirm and giggle.

‘Daddy, that tickles!’ She laughed and tried to grab his hand to stop him.

But he had already stopped, freezing at what she said. That was the first time she had called him that, even in little space.

The biggest smile spread across his face and he buried his face into her hair and squeezed her tightly to him.

‘Sorry, my sweet little one. I forgot how ticklish you are.’ He purred.

#Loki #Tom Hiddleston #Loki x OFC #Loki x original female character #fan fiction #my sweet rose

149 notes · View notes

qianinterprises · 3 years

Text

Warm Mornings

Pairing | Jeno x Reader x Jaemin

Warning(s) | slightly suggestive (if you squint), polyamorous relationship

Synopsis | Just an everyday morning in the life of you, snuggled between the loves of your life.

Author’s Notes | I wrote this after reading this by @bluejaem. After getting permission (in the form of a brain dumped imagine lol), I decided to write my own little NoMin poly! I would also like to add that I started over three damn times before I was finally happy with it, but it has not been beta read so... expect grammatical errors (Im sorry!)

Work Count | 1.9K

°:. *₊ . ☆ ° . *₊ ☆ ✮ ° . ☆ *₊ ☆°:. *₊ ° . ☆ ✮　 °:. *₊ °:. *₊ . ☆ ° . *₊ ☆ ✮ ° . ☆ *₊ ☆°:. *₊ °

As morning bloomed over the city, pulling individuals out of their dreams to dawn a new day, you rolled over under the blankets, careful not to disturb the arms wrapped around your waist in your quest for comfort. As you settled on your side, facing the eastern window, your eyes cracked open, sleep already leaving you for awakeness.

Sunlight beamed into the window, casting hues of gold along the walls, creating patterns and designs of light around the room. One beam of sun in particular hit the back of the man to your left, light bouncing off his bare skin and illuminating his body in such a way he appeared to almost be glowing. Golden rays bounced off his dyed brown hair, creating such an heir of elegant innocence around him.

The bed ruffled and the body behind you wiggled until one of the arms around your waist was pulling you back against a broad chest, face nestling in your neck, blowing soft tufts of air across your sensitive skin, making you shudder.

“Good morning,” his voice was deep and raspy, husky with sleep.

“Morning,” you whispered back, quiet so as not to wake the male in front of you.

“Is he glowing?”

A smile falls across your face, eyes roving over the porcelain face of Na Jaemin, deep in the confines of sleep, eyes fluttering lightly with dreams, hair a mess atop his head.

“Like an angel,” you whispered.

The arms around your waist seemed to tighten even more as he pressed a kiss on your jaw.

“Our angel.”

You placed your hands lightly over his, stroking along his skin, tracing the bulging veins that came with being a well-built muscular man with a love for exercise.

“Are you two talking about me again?”

Jaemin’s voice brought a yelp from your throat and your body lurched backwards in shock, unfortunately sending your foot into a not so friendly place for the man behind you.

The arms released your body completely as said male let out a slow whine, hands moving down to cup himself, coaxing the organ to stop spiking with the pain your foot had left.

You rolled over, careful of your limbs this time to check that the male was alright.

Lee Jeno. A tall, lanky but muscular man that had stolen your heart the first time your eyes met. His face was contorted in pain, eyes squeezed shut to keep in the tears that surely weren’t far from falling.

“I am so sorry!” you breathed, reaching out to place a hand on his shoulder, but he flinched at your touch.

“Give him a moment. Let him catch his bearings.”

Jaemin’s voice wasn’t half so husky now as he wound his arms around his waist and pulled you back, careful of your feet as you curled your legs again comfortably.

“That wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t been pretending to be asleep!” you hissed.

“Oh I wasn’t pretending. You two just aren’t as quiet as you think you are.”

You turned your head to send a glare at him when a puff of air left Jeno’s lips and his body uncurled itself. His eyes opened, glassy, and he blinked a few times to rid the tears that threatened to fall.

“Next time you jump in fear, try to make sure your not curled up first!”

Jaemin snorted and you shook your hide, sliding out of Jaemin’s arms and closer to Jeno, who engulfed you in a bear hug, pressing your face against his shoulder.

“No fair! He got cuddles already! I haven’t got my cuddles yet!” Jaemin’s voice whined behind you.

“I just got kicked in the balls! I think I deserve a few extra cuddles!” Jeno insisted.

You rolled your eyes and pulled away from Jeno slightly. He let out a small, puppy whine, hands clinging to your waist as Jaemin cackled behind you, making a grab to pull you away. He let out his own yelp when you slapped one of his hands away and instead, grabbed his arm, tugging him closer until his chest was pressed against your back.

“You can both cuddle me,” you mumbled, nuzzling your face into Jeno’s neck as Jaemin’s arms slowly wrapped themselves around your body.

Your eyes began to droop as two warm bodies help you snuggly between them, hands softly stroking your back or your arms, lulling you back into your dreams, breathing in Jeno’s scent of earthy body wash, content at the way Jaemin’s lips pressed butterfly kisses along your neck.

°:. *₊ . ☆ ° . *₊ ☆ ✮ ° . ☆ *₊ ☆°:. *₊ ° . ☆ ✮　 °:. *₊ °:. *₊ . ☆ ° . *₊ ☆ ✮ ° . ☆ *₊ ☆°:. *₊ °

When you opened your eyes for the second time, you noted the lack of arms around you and the rhythmic heartbeat against your ear.

You let out a soft yawn, shuffling closer to the chest, immediately recognizing it as Jeno’s. You wound your arms around his waist, holding onto him like an overstuffed teddy bear.

He had his phone in his hand, playing some weird alien-killing game, his other hand lazily drawing patterns beneath your shirt against your back.

“Where’s Jaemin?” you asked with a small yawn, nuzzling closer.

“In the kitchen.”

It shouldn’t have been a surprise when he didn’t glance up from the game as another green alien blob appeared on screen.

“I’m going to go see if he needs any help.”

You moved to get up, but the hand down your shirt quickly pulled out and wound itself around your waist, preventing you from moving.

“I’m under strict orders not to let you out of this bed.”

You rolled your eyes but complied, happy to rest your head against Jeno’s bare chest, but his abs were only so interesting.

“Can you hand me my phone?”

Dating two was a lot different than dating just one. You had to make compromises and things didn’t always work out flawlessly. For example, sleeping arrangements.

After dating for a while, the three of you had decided to get an apartment together rather than living in two separate apartments (because Jeno and Jaemin already lived together). It made sense, especially with their differing jobs and never having time to go on dates as a trio. When you’d first bought the apartment, you’d taken your queen sized bed from your old one, but that quickly ended in disaster, either Jaemin or Jeno ending up on the floor in the middle of the night after being kicked out of bed from a restless sleeper.

After finding one or both men snuggled up uncomfortably on the couch because the bed just wasn’t big enough for the three of you, you’d pooled your money and bought a larger, King sized bed. However, while this kept you all in bed without bruises, it also meant you were stuck under two blankets between two boys, both of which radiated heat like a space heater.

You’d find yourself waking up in the middle of the night, their arms wrapped around you, your shirt sticking to your back in sweat, which should have been an easy enough solution, just kick the blankets off. Problem was, when you did, you either squirmed so much it woke one or both of them up, or you ended up warm and toasty between two shivering boys. That was an issue solved with a ceiling fan, though it wasn’t perfect.

The newest issue, however, was always needing assistance to reach something. Rather than sleeping on a side with a night stand, you were constantly shaking them awake to ask for a sip of water from the nightstand or crawling over one of them to use the restroom. A solution to this problem didn’t seem so simple as the others. However, despite waking them up countless times in the middle of the night, they never complained. In fact, they almost seemed happy to do it, even when Jaemin was sluggishly pulling himself out of bed at 5am for work after a rough night.

Unwinding his arm from around your waist, Jeno reached for your phone on the nightstand, unplugging it, and placing it in your hands, wrapping his arm back around your waist and going back to his game.

Pressing a kiss to his chest in thanks, you unlocked your phone, smiling at the photo of the three of you at the beach, begrudgingly taken by Donghyuck who’d gotten roped into third-wheeling when Renjun had bailed at the last minute.

You opened your Tumblr account, shifting to hide your screen from curious eyes and you pulled up your initial feed, hearting posts and reblogging memes until you came upon a fic from your favorite blog <your favorite blog> featuring South Korean heartthrob, Jung Jaehyun.

Biting down on your lower lip, you took another glance at Jeno before letting your eyes scan greedily over the words, drinking them in. It wasn’t long before you were fully absorbed in the story that you didn’t realize Jaemin was calling your name until the phone was snatched out of your hands.

“Geez! You’d think you’d gone deaf!” Jaemin exclaimed.

You felt your cheeks heat up, nose twitching in embarrassment as you carooned into Jeno’s chest.

“What in the-”

Jeno cut himself off. You glanced up at him, curious as to what had shocked him, only for your eyes to widen when you found him gaping at your screen.

“What kind of filth-!”

“It’s called smut! And it’s not for you!” you cried, reaching for the phone, only to have it raised higher, out of your reach.

You huffed.

“When did you start reading that stuff?!” Jaemin gaped.

“Probably around the same time Jeno put that virus on your laptop!”

“Hey!”

“So you’re the culprit! I had to explain to my older brother why I had a virus from an adult site I’d never watched before!” Jaemin exclaimed.

He jumped on the bed, grabbed his pillow, and hit Jeno over the head with it, hitting you at the same time.

“Ouch!” you whined. “Stop it!”

Jaemin huffed and flopped down on the bed, crossing his arms over his chest.

Jeno placed your phone back on the table and all was quiet until you turned to look at Jaemin.

“What were you calling me for anyways?”

He stared at you in confusion for a moment before perking up.

“Oh! Do you want orange juice or coffee?”

“Um… coffee duh! We started dating two years ago, right? Not yesterday?”

“I was just making sure!” he grumbled, crawling out of bed and stomping back to the kitchen.

When he was gone, Jeno leaned down to place a kiss on your forehead.

“I still want to know why you were reading filth about that idol…”

“Just forget it Jeno. You wouldn’t understand,” you groaned.

Not even a minute later, Jaemin was walking back into the room carefully balancing three trays in his arms. Jeno reached out to grab his own. Jaemin placed your tray over your lap and slid back under the blankets on your left. You sat up in bed and leaned close to press a kiss to the males cheek, only for him to turn at the last minute, capturing your lips.

He brought a hand to your face, cupping your cheek softly, drawing you closer as his tongue brushed over your bottom lip before pulling away, placing a lasting peck on your forehead.

“I love you,” he whispered.

You nuzzled yourself closer, careful not to disturb the tray of food on your lap.

“I love you more,” Jeno, clearly dissatisfied with his lack of attention, stated moving up behind you and pressing a kiss to your shoulder.

You let out a breathy laugh, wrapped one arm around Jaemin’s neck, the other around Jeno’s.

“I love you both the most.”

#ficscafe #nct nomin #jaemin x reader #jeno x reader #nct fluff #poly relationship #Soft #love

309 notes · View notes

imagine-loki · 3 years

Text

My Sweet Rose, Chapter 1

TITLE: My Sweet Rose CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 1 AUTHOR: fanficshiddles ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine you are secretly a little but no one knows, one day you decide to check out a local BDSM club to try and get a feel of the community. You meet a handsome stranger that, over the next few months, shows you all about the lifestyle. However, one day… he vanishes without a word.

RATING: M NOTES: Daddy/little dynamic & Flashbacks will be in Bold.

I’m not sure how long this story will be, I’m thinking no more than 5 chapters though. But I saw the imagine and omg I love it, had to do something with it. Haven’t written anymore of it yet but just HAD to share the first chapter so far, oops! lol.