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andthebeanstalk · 1 year

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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agnes-come-back-challenge · 2 months

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I love that everyone in TMA is just. Unremarkable. Jon isnt a heroic character; he's self-loathing and depressed and he exhibits the same self-pity as I do when I'm self-loathing and depressed. He doesn't stand out for his strength of will or quick-thinking or virtue. He's a good person but he stops trying to stay human when it gets uncomfortable. He's everything that a regular person is when theyre trapped in a horrible situation and it's ugly and insufferable and Real.

#and dont even get me started on the rest of them #martin is jealous and petty and manipulative #and look at his life— look at his mother— of course he is!#basira would never do the things daisy does but she's perfectly content to look the other way and ignore it #and she does the same thing in the archives— the world is ending and she hides away with her books and pretends it's none of her business #and oh god MELANIE #like #it really drives home tim's point that all you need for the fears to ruin your life is just bad luck #tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #jon sims

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bixels · 20 days

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Scary Sunset.

I'm concepting things way outta order in this story, but I'm sure you can piece things together. Context is for a storybeat where, after defeating and capturing Adagio (thus having all three sirens in her possession), Sunset enacts her revenge plot to release the sirens on Canterlot as Thea discovers she's been manipulated. In a confrontation, the two scuffle and fight over the siren orbs while Sunset struggles with her conflicting wants and emotions.

#mlp #sunset shimmer #twilight sparkle #twiset #the orbs are the glass balls sunset carries on her back btw its in her cast line up art #deep down sunset hates thea. she was named “twilight” by celestia. the time of day succeeding sunset. she was always her replacement #but at this point in the story sunset's also fallen for thea. so it's also a conflict of wills in sunset. love or hatred.#hence the “don't make me do this” language. she's rationalizing her hatred and violence as thea forcing her hand and getting in her way #when in reality she doesn't need to do any of this. it's her last stand and outburst to cling to a life of revenge that she's grown too #fond of. because she knows thea has the power to change that and disrupt her identity as a pathetic victim who fell from glory #and that's scary. thea's a very scary thing to sunset because suddenly sunset wants something and to be someone new.#she suddenly wants to change. to be better for someone else. and she never thought or believed that could be an option for her #anyways toxic yuri yayyy #my art #the grand galloping 20s #character design #i hope i got across the pained conflicted emotions in sunset's face tho i belabored over them these past 3 days #i hope a look of anger and dissonance and guilt and “oh god i don't really wanna hurt you please just obey me” while trying to intimidate #is readable. if so it's all in the eyebrows babey

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homeforclones · 22 days

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The difference between Season 1 and Season 3 of the Bad Batch

Season 1: Omega: Crosshair, can I have a hug? Crosshair: The audacity??? Of this Child??? Nothing would revolt me more than to show any kind of weakness to sate your neediness. Season 3: Omega: Crosshair, you're getting a hug. Crosshair: The charity??? Of my Sister??? Nothing would give me more joy than to be hugged by the Literal Angel that you are, though I am a lowly worm.

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artiststarme · 1 month

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One day the kids wake up and they can’t find Steve. They search his house, the school track, the basketball courts, anywhere they can think of where they might find him and he’s nowhere to be found. When they go to Robin’s house, she’s missing too. Her parents haven’t seen her since she disgraced their family by proclaiming herself to be a lesbian.

Even Eddie hasn’t seen either of them and that’s particularly worrying since the three of them are always together.

Both Steve and Robin come back two weeks later with sunburns and matching tattoos on their wrists. They had been at one of the Harrington vacation homes in Florida getting drunk, checking out girls, and getting tattoos. It’s also when Steve realized he was interested in Eddie and plants a smooch on him as soon as he gets back to see Eddie checking out his ass.

#the kids are happy to see them back until Steve kisses Eddie #then in the most respectful and accepting way possible they tell him to get lost again #because gross-don’t mack on their dungeon master #Robin is just enjoying the out and proud life away from her toxic parents #stranger things #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley

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fifthnailinstevesbat · 2 months

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steve “cant get out of bed till middle of the day, barely leaves his house or is never home, isolating himself from everyone, never takes time for himself anymore, depressed and is slowly losing more and more of himself every single day” harrington post 1986’

robin “i know you loved her, and it must’ve killed that she wouldn’t take you back, but nancy is happy steve and she still loves you. she’s not the only one out there for you, and you’ve gotta get over it. we miss you” buckley post 1986’, trying to help her best friend

steve “…this isn’t about nancy” harrington.

robin “wha-?… oh. oh steve.” buckley.

he still wears the vest.

#stranger things #eddie munson #steddie #steve harrington #nancy wheeler #stranger things 4 #robin buckley #yeah idk #i just thoight abt this #bc i miss my pooks #steve being so distraught after the events of s4 #and it’s understandable and everyone else is kinda the same level of shook up for a while #but for steve it just… continues #and nobody really knows what’s going on #robin tries to get him out of his shell without prying for so long #but eventually she just straight up tells him how it is in an attempt to get him to TALK to her #SAY SOMETHING #bc she thinks it must be he is heartbroken abt nancy #she didn’t want him back #and that’s so rough but #robin wants him to know that she isn’t the only person in his life that loves him #even if it’s not in the way he is wanting #but steve just #he just says; this isn’t about nancy #and robin is confused #then she puts it all together #then she understands.#eddie.

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monty-glasses-roxy · 8 months

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HALLOWEEN GAME TIME!!! WE'RE GOING TRICK OR TREATING!!!

ON THE DAY OF HALLOWEEN ask me or anyone else that's reblogged this, "trick or treat" and you shall recieve a random thing in your trick or treater bucket! What thing?

THAT'S UP TO WHO'S BLOG DOOR YOU'RE KNOCKING ON!!

A little doodle of their blorbo? An incorrect quote? A drawing of a little cat? A fun fact about bees? A little drabble (100 words I mean but do as you will) for a random thing? A photo of their pet dog? A headcanon? A fic recommendation? A random meme? An OC? A link to their current favourite song? A nice, virtual slap in the face? A trick? A treat? WHO KNOWS!!! NOT YOU OR ME THAT'S FOR SURE!!! (Just no screamers or shit like that of course lets not forget that lmao)

Why am I saying this now instead of on the day of the game? So anyone else that wants to play has plenty of time to prepare a little handful of things for the trick or treaters!!

Remember, it doesn't have to be anything big!!! You can be the blog that's giving everyone images of rotisserrie chicken you found on google, or you can be the blog that's giving everyone pictures of your cat if you want!! This is a low spoons and low stress game so do whatever you want to do that's easy for you!! Be a mix of everything or just give a 'hi!' it doesn't matter, it's all in good fun!! And we can trick or treat each other too, of course. Not as fun if you can't get any tricks or treats too, right? Anyone can trick or treat and anyone can be trick or treated!

I recommend making/queueing a post on the day so everyone knows you're playing btw (anyone that reblogs this post will get one off me too if they don't say otherwise in tags and if I remember I said this)

FOR TRICK OR TREATERS!!!

All you gotta do is send an ask with 'trick or treat' in it on Halloween! Halloween day!! 31st of October!! Day of spooky!! That's it!! (And if you go on anon no one will know if you come back again but I didn't tell you that lmao) I'll be answering any I get when it's Halloween in my timezone and I'm sure I won't be the only one so if you ask earlier, hang tight! It's probably not Halloween yet or they don't have time just yet cause it's a Tuesday! I believe that's everything so...

Have fun guys!!

#halloween game #yeah I know this is the kind of thing that circles every year btw #but I can't for the life of me remember anyone actually doing it :(#so here's a game!!#I will try my damn best to do it so stay tuned for that!!!#I'll make a little mix of things to share it'll be fun!#plenty of time to build up a little collection of low spoons stuff I think #honestly a great way to get myself back into things probably #we'll see!

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mumblesplash · 5 months

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part 2!!!! [read part one here]

transcript below the cut arranged into stanzas to help show where the rhymes are:

“that’s why they brought gem in? as a failsafe?” as a pawn. we were told to point her at whoever we need gone

“gem won’t hurt her allies. …yet.” the curse she carries will it’s had its eye on her since she lost the other eye she was specially selected for her hunting skill it’s quite the high honor. “wow. how generous.” we try

think about it: why does almost no one fight the curse? “given how fast scott killed skizz last season, i can guess.” [“any pain you spare your friends, you’ll have to suffer worse”?] it’s designed to shut down higher reasoning with stress

#if you still can't see the rhyme scheme try reading it out loud #if that doesn't work uh. idk. can't help you #my art #grian #geminitay #smajor1995 #bdoubleo100 #inthelittlewood #secret life #grian and his terrible horrible no good very bad eldritch coworkers: the sequel #cant wait to post the next part so i can be like 'my three secret life comics. and yes they all rhyme'#this one narratively doesn't work nearly as well as a standalone compared to part 1 #however i accidentally went way too hard and could probably upload the middle page + second to last panel as their own separate art pieces #tbh i'm considering putting an explanation of everything below the readmore buuut i don't feel like it atm. :3 later maybe #me and my 20+ life series headcanons i only allude to without explicitly stating don't need to explain ourselves #still experimenting with this webtoon-esque vertical comic style #still not sure i like it #it gets long too quickly #among other things #but it's very easy to read on a phone so

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spicyraeman · 3 months

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Lae'zel doodle with some post zaith'isk hcs

#bg3 #lae'zel #nice TBI hows the whole traitor to your people thing goin btw #we just... do not talk about how this girl can get holes punched in her brain in act 1 #and the only way to fix it is slurp down one of the worms #yknow the thing that laezel is the most resistant to doing #she has the worst day of her life and then when she goes to do the thing she was explicitly told to do in this situation #it just gets even worse #she just cant catch a break

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tubbytarchia · 3 months

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gg buddy am I right (ethubs doodle that I don't know what to do with)

#ethubs #Ive wanted to draw ethubs angst for so many days but art block is still hitting hard and this thing has been sitting around for awhile #hey ethubers how did you. survive #last life ethubs upsets me so much make it end #The way after Bdubs dies Etho is trying to justify to himself not having given him a life to begin with rather than #telling him to prove himself #its like he expects the others who are with him to comment on it but they dont. Etho's all "I couldn't have just given it to him you know..#without them asking about it or anything. And Etho just keeps going. god damn it Etho I feel so bad for them #dont even get me started on what Bdubs said to G about Etho grrrr GRRRR I saw that for the first time not long ago GRRRRRR #I still wanna draw proper ethubs though. someday #also the damage to Bdubs' face is supposed to be from the rocket Lizzie shot #does it make sense? No probably not but its an excuse to make him look more dead #tubby art

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bongosinferno · 1 month

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A devastating and confusing thing about the Fallout setting, when you explore the pre-war aspects, is what the creators think about pre-war America. In the first games we only get hints of the pre-war world, but they seem to be some sort of wild fascist nation invading Canada. In Fallout 1, the first thing we're introduced to of the pre-war society is seeing a soldier shoot civilians and laughing.

Now, for the first 2 games and New Vegas we don't really know much. What we know is that there's a fascist military group known as the enclave who were a sort of US deep state even before the war, and that the government teamed up with corporate interests to preform vaguely MKULTRA-ish experiments with the Vaults. Basically, the government was an extreme version of the 50s American jingoism and McCarthyism.

This is well and dandy, I guess issues come up more when we get to the later games, especially 4, where it seems like none of this extreme plotting and societal civil unrest which would exist is seen. The society as presented in 4 also seems quite progressive, gay people are featured in the opening, and none of the baggage of say, civil rights not existing are included. Now on a baseline, I don't want settings to be more conservative, homophobic and sexist etc., but it becomes a very confusing setting when it's displayed both as this jingoist extreme thing with fascist tendencies aswell as a progressive place where everyone is seemingly equal. If you're focusing on the 50s as your setting, and American nationalism in the 50s, then you can't have McCarthyism spoofs and anti-communism as a societal paranoia norm while also general equality is the norm without misunderstanding why McCarthyism and nationalist jingoism is bad. A massive harm done in anti-communist paranoia is how it degrades and vilifies any progressive movements (women's rights, civil rights, homosexuality) as being morally un-American and therefore connected to communism. To ignore this just makes any critique of MacCarthyism and jingoism weird!

Basically, pre-war America in Fallout 4 becomes this both sides thing where America is both pure and equal and white fences in every instance that we see as the player (the intro), while also supposedly being this dystopic MacCarthyist hellscape that's broadcasting gladly about their war crimes in Canada, and wants to root out communism. I guess the only fix for this issue without getting into the fine print like they had to do is just not to focus too much on the pre-war world.

#fallout #fallout 1 #fallout 2 #fallout 3 #fallout 4 #fallout new vegas #fo1 #fo2 #fonv #fo4 #I'm almost half-way through the show #it suffers from this too but whatever I'm just going to count it as it's own thing #it gets a pass or whatever. telling a video game story and telling a tv-series is completely different #they can do what they think is useful.#We see a bit of what the I'm talking about in New Vegas with mr house being able to be that rich etc #but new vegas cares more about the fallout of Fallout 2 + new ideas than some pre-war America. The most we get is like Poseidon energy and #Raul. but Raul doesn't really care that much about the details of the past world #his life seems pretty normal. it's not that important.#dead money and owb did this like... Okay. wasn't too bad it was fine. I don't like those DLCs too much. Dean Domino is whatever

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copypastus · 6 months

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Feyre's selective hearing is the origin of my villain arc.

#my art #acotar #acotar fanart #rhysand #feyre archeron #feysand #acomaf #anti feyre #anti sjm #rhys killed his tamily too feyre!#that was a pretty important part of that story!#he melted his brother's brains!#his dad killed tamlin's mom even tho he promised him he wouldn't #wow what are the odds tamlin went through something similar when rhys's mom and sister got killed #rhys wasn't there #AND NO ONE BOTHERS TO ASK HIM #srsly tho i get it she's fully on board the tamlin hate train at this point #but the way she twists every little thing the man does to be him being an asshole on purpose is just >_>#tamlin did nothing wrong ever in his life

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otaku553 · 6 months

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Ok so I have been stewing this crossover au in my brain nonstop for the past few days and. I am nothing if not committed to the bit, so. Volume cover redraws :)

Here are the originals:

If you want to read more about my one piece spy x family crossover, keep reading!

So the idea is simple! Crossover reincarnation au where ASL is reborn in Spy x Family. They’re each born separately and none of them are born with the same names as their previous lives, and with no way of finding each other, they each find their own thing to do in the world.

Sabo, too used to the dangers of being a spy, eventually finds a cause to devote himself to again, in preventing war from engulfing the country he was reborn in. Ace, drawn to fire as he was in his previous life, used arson as a means to rob rich people for sustenance and survival, and is eventually scouted and hired by Garden as a fire specialist and assassin. And Luffy, though born in perhaps the poorest condition, grows up happily and takes whatever part time jobs he wants to do.

The thing about Sabo is that, as much as he seems like a young man of good repute and high standing within society, everyone in WISE knows that he is a massive nuisance. Nobody knew in the beginning how a child less than half the age of most of their veteran agents could have the same skills and knowledge in their profession. Sabo was— and still is— hyper competent, and by the time WISE figured out just how much of a menace to society he was, it was too late.

Ace forgot for the first few years of his new life that he wasn’t made of fire, and consequently, received multiple accidental burns. This did not deter him, however, from growing up to be a very skilled arsonist, well-practiced in every which way to start a dumpster fire or house fire. As a teenage he would use this often to draw attention as he robbed rich people blind. When he was caught, he was given an ultimatum by Garden: join them and receive payment for starting fires and causing problems under contract, or face the government and authorities for his crimes. Begrudgingly, he joined Garden, but eventually comes to appreciate that he can make substantial money in his element.

Luffy is Luffy. No telepathy or experimentation, no fancy schools, no gimmicks or secret identities. But he has still lived an extremely colorful life in this world, full of fascinating and kind individuals who have helped him grow up healthy and relatively happy. He goes where he is free, and he takes whatever part time jobs he wants in order to make the minimum he needs to survive.

Ace and Sabo find each other first, in their late teens, and neither of them realize that the other remembers their previous life, but both refuse to separate. (Sabo thinks Ace doesn’t remember, because Ace didn’t recognize him. Ace never saw Sabo grow up past 10, however, so he doesn’t recognize older Sabo immediately. By the time he does realize who exactly Sabo is, Sabo has backtracked and pretends to know Ace from a dream, or from somewhere else.)

Sabo’s attachment to Ace, predictably, causes problems between Sabo and WISE, but by then, Sabo is indispensable to the organization, and they make an exception for Sabo to be able to remain with Ace, so long as Ace never finds out what Sabo’s actual job is. Ace, on the other hand, hides his job because he doesn’t want his brother, who he has just found and who does not know Ace well enough yet, to know that he makes a living from killing people.

And they find Luffy sometime afterwards, prior to the beginning of the Spy x Family canon. Luffy figures out, not long after moving in with his brothers, both of his brothers’ secret occupations and the fact that both of them remember their past memories. He thinks it is common knowledge, however, and so he never brings it up.

#one piece #spy x family crossover #sabo #monkey d luffy #portgas d ace #crossover #I have so many ideas for this au #I’ll probably write like a drabble series for it #maybe. if I get around to it #extra things:#Loid and sabo get paired on a nonzero number of missions as siblings #they are only 6 years apart in age and they’re both blond so WISE is like.. ‘it’s free real estate’#every time this happens sabo finds a way to sneak into conversations that they’re actually cousins instead #this annoys loid a LOT because he thinks sabo can’t keep a cover to save his life. sabo is aware but he only has 2 brothers #and even in disguise he refuses to let someone else take ace and luffy’s place #ace’s codename within Garden is either ‘flame lily’ or ‘pyracantha’#the latter being another name for the firethorn plant #yor has only heard of him in passing and has not met him in person before. but she knows that she is sent whenever he blunders and lets #someone see his face #Luffy is kind of just chilling! he takes a lot of part time jobs everywhere #to the point that loid is briefly worried that he’s a tail or stalker or something since he keeps seeing luffy around #Anya really loves playing with Luffy though because luffy has such vivid thoughts of the ocean and being a pirate #ok that’s it for now #I am very. brainrotting

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age-of-moonknight · 8 months

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“Systemic Approach (Part Two),” Avengers Unlimited (Vol. 1/2022), Infinity Comic, #64.

Writer: Mat Groom; Penciler and Inker: Caio Majado; Colorist: Pete Pantazis; Letterer: Joe Sabino

#Marvel #Marvel comics #Marvel 616 #Avengers Unlimited #Avengers Unlimited Infinity Comic #Moon Knight comics #latest release #Moon Knight #Marc Spector #Jake Lockley #Steven Grant #Captain America #Steve Rogers #hey Mr. Groom excuse me but how did you get access to inside my head because this is pretty much exactly what I could have wanted in life #because don’t get me wrong I love Mr. MacKay’s run but one thing I’ve been missing is just Steven - Jake - and Marc interacting #(and I was hoping that the name of this arc was in reference to the Moon Knight system but I hadn’t dared hope too much)#which means there’s so much I love here #love Jake’s jacket and the acknowledgement that the people he mingles with are in no way lesser than Steven’s socialite #or Marc’s superhero ilk but rather the people who often just need some help (whether that be through Steven’s funds/business acumen #Jake’s hands-on social support #or Marc’s /very/ hands-on support method of boxing villains over the head) but could be the least likely to get it #and !!!!! an acknowledgement that the system is a strength and an invaluable asset to Moon Knight work !!!!#and that it was Khonshu’s influence that was largely the problem as opposed to the system’s neurodivergence !!!!#and an acknowledgement from Cap of all people! I WEEP #it just means so much to me: Marc getting some support both from the system and from Cap #as well as how in character this is for Cap #as some of my favorite moments of his are where he reaches out to those deemed by others too ‘unstable’ or ‘unreliable’ to ever amount to #much in the grand scheme of things and he asks them to be Avengers #recognizing what invaluable talents they posses #could the cynical say this reads like a Saturday morning psa? sure but this is an infinity comic with Cap. Enjoy it for what it is akshsksj

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kis-ki · 2 years

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“i’ll post a new fic this week guys” AND IT’S A LIE. AND I LIE.

i am sorry (not)

#life gets in the way of things #no time #just work #and school #rhi speaks

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corvidcall · 2 years

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None Of You Know What Haiku Are

I'm going to preface this by saying that i am not an expert in ANY form of poetry, just an enthusiast. Also, this post is... really long. Too long? Definitely too long. Whoops! I love poetry.

If you ask most English-speaking people (or haiku-bot) what a haiku is, they would probably say that it's a form of poetry that has 3 lines, with 5, and then 7, and then 5 syllables in them. That's certainly what I was taught in school when we did our scant poetry unit, but since... idk elementary school when I learned that, I've learned that that's actually a pretty inaccurate definition of haiku. And I think that inaccurate definition is a big part of why most people (myself included until relatively recently!) think that haiku are kind of... dumb? unimpressive? simple and boring? I mean, if you can just put any words with the right number of syllables into 3 lines, what makes it special?

Well, let me get into why the 5-7-5 understanding of haiku is wrong, and also what makes haiku so special (with examples)!

First of all, Japanese doesn't have syllables! There's a few different names for what phonetic units actually make up the language- In Japanese, they're called "On" (音), which translates to "sound", although English-language linguists often call it a "mora" (μ), which (quoting from Wikipedia here) "is a basic timing unit in the phonology of some spoken languages, equal to or shorter than a syllable." (x) "Oh" is one syllable, and also one mora, whereas "Oi" has one syllable, but two moras. "Ba" has one mora, "Baa" has two moras, etc. In English, we would say that a haiku is made up of three lines, with 5-7-5 syllables in them, 17 syllables total. In Japanese, that would be 17 sounds.

For an example of the difference, the word "haiku", in English, has 2 syllables (hai-ku), but in Japanese, はいく has 3 sounds (ha-i-ku). "Christmas" has 2 syllables, but in Japanese, "クリスマス" (ku-ri-su-ma-su) is 5 sounds! that's a while line on its own! Sometimes the syllables are the same as the sounds ("sushi" is two syllables, and すし is two sounds), but sometimes they're very different.

In addition, words in Japanese are frequently longer than their English equivalents. For example, the word "cuckoo" in Japanese is "ほととぎす" (hototogisu).

Now, I'm sure you're all very impressed at how I can use an English to Japanese dictionary (thank you, my mother is proud), but what does any of this matter? So two languages are different. How does that impact our understanding of haiku?

Well, if you think about the fact that Japanese words are frequently longer than English words, AND that Japanese counts sounds and not syllables, you can see how, "based purely on a 17-syllable counting method, a poet writing in English could easily slip in enough words for two haiku in Japanese” (quote from Grit, Grace, and Gold: Haiku Celebrating the Sports of Summer by Kit Pancoast Nagamura). If you're writing a poem using 17 English syllables, you are writing significantly more content than is in an authentic Japanese haiku.

(Also not all Japanese haiku are 17 sounds at all. It's really more of a guideline.)

Focusing on the 5-7-5 form leads to ignoring other strategies/common conventions of haiku, which personally, I think are more interesting! Two of the big ones are kigo, a season word, and kireji, a cutting word.

Kigo are words/phrases/images associated with a particular season, like snow for winter, or cherry blossoms for spring. In Japan, they actually publish reference books of kigo called saijiki, which is basically like a dictionary or almanac of kigo, describing the meaning, providing a list of related words, and some haiku that use that kigo. Using a a particular kigo both grounds the haiku in a particular time, but also alludes to other haiku that have used the same one.

Kireji is a thing that doesn't easily translate to English, but it's almost like a spoken piece of punctuation, separating the haiku into two parts/images that resonate with and add depth to each other. Some examples of kireji would be "ya", "keri", and "kana." Here's kireji in action in one of the most famous haiku:

古池や　蛙飛び込む　水の音 (Furu ike ya　kawazu tobikomu　mizu no oto) (The old pond — A frog jumps in The sound of the water.)

You can see the kireji at the end of the first line- 古池や literally translates to "old pond ya". The "ya" doesn't have linguistic meaning, but it denotes the separation between the two focuses of the haiku. First, we are picturing a pond. It's old, mature. The water is still. And then there's a frog! It's spring and he's fresh and new to the world! He jumps into the pond and goes "splash"! Wowie! When I say "cutting word", instead of say, a knife cutting, I like to imagine a film cut. The camera shows the pond, and then it cuts to the frog who jumps in.

English doesn't really have a version of this, at least not one that's spoken, but in English language haiku, people will frequently use a dash or an ellipses to fill the same role.

Format aside, there are also some conventions of the actual content, too. They frequently focus on nature, and are generally use direct language without metaphor. They use concrete images without judgement or analysis, inviting the reader to step into their shoes and imagine how they'd feel in the situation. It's not about describing how you feel, so much as it's about describing what made you feel.

Now, let's put it all together, looking at a haiku written Yosa Buson around 1760 (translated by Harold G. Henderson)

The piercing chill I feel: my dead wife's comb, in our bedroom, under my heel

We've got our kigo with "the piercing chill." We read that, and we imagine it's probably winter. It's cold, and the kind of cold wind that cuts through you. There's our kireji- this translation uses a colon to differentiate our two images: the piercing chill, and the poet stepping on his dead wife's comb. There's no descriptions of what the poet is feeling, but you can imagine stepping into his shoes. You can imagine the pain he's experiencing in that moment on your own.

"But tumblr user corvidcall!" I hear you say, "All the examples you've used so far are Japanese haiku that have been translated! Are you implying that it's impossible for a good haiku to be written in English?" NO!!!!! I love English haiku! Here's a good example, which won first place in the 2000 Henderson haiku contest, sponsored by the Haiku Society of America:

meteor shower . . . a gentle wave wets our sandals

When you read this one, can you imagine being in the poet's place? Do you feel the surprise as the tide comes in? Do you feel the summer-ness of the moment? Haiku are about describing things with the senses, and how you take in the world around you. In a way, it's like the poet is only setting a scene, which you inhabit and fill with meaning based on your own experiences. You and I are imagining different beaches, different waves, different people that make up the "our" it mentioned.

"Do I HAVE to include all these things when I write haiku? If I include all these things, does that mean my haiku will be good?" I mean, I don't know. What colors make up a good painting? What scenes make up a good play? It's a creative medium, and nobody can really tell you you can't experiment with form. Certainly not me! But I think it's important to know what the conventions of the form are, so you can appreciate good examples of it, and so you can know what you're actually experimenting with. And I mean... I'm not the poetry cops. But if you're not interested in engaging with the actual conventions and limitations of the form, then why are you even using that form?

I'll leave you with one more English language haiku, which is probably my favorite haiku ever. It was written by Tom Bierovic, and won first place at the 2021 Haiku Society of America Haiku Awards

a year at most . . . we pretend to watch the hummingbirds

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