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wavesoutbeingtossed · 6 months

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So while I’m on my “You’re Losing Me” riff, another thing that really strikes me about the song is how pervasive loneliness is in it.

This isn’t inherently unique in Taylor’s music; she is after all the narrator in most of her songs. They are inherently self-centered and not in a selfish way, but in a literal way: these are songs about her and her perspective. It makes sense then that YLM is uniquely about her experience in this relationship and this breakdown.

But when I talk about the theme of loneliness, it’s how alone she as narrator is throughout the story. Even in the opening salvo, where he says, “I don’t understand,” and she says, “I know you don’t,” the conversation represents two people fundamentally pushed to their own corners.

There is a clear split between we and I throughout the story.

We thought a cure would come through, now I fear it won’t. We loved this room cause of the light, but now I just sit in the dark and wonder if it’s time. Should I throw out everything we built?

There’s a divide between when they were on the same team, and when she’s been cast adrift. They were working on fixing their problems, but now she alone is burdened with the knowledge that they’ve passed the point of no return. They chose a home to house their future dreams together, but now she’s left all alone in the dark feeling those dreams slip away. They built a life, but now she’s the one having the make the call to take it down.

But it gets progressively darker than that. The line about being a phoenix mending all her own gashes has always jumped out at me, because it connotes her dealing with blow after blow by herself, having to put herself back together each time, the onslaught relentless even if she ultimately overcomes. Yet it’s him who tears her apart for good. The image it paints is of a person continually facing her own struggles on her own, dealing with the fallout like a lone wolf (sorry for the continued animal allusions?), but whatever it is that the subject he does breaks her worse than the thousand cuts she’s experienced before. Even here, the idea is of a person who shoulders her burdens by herself and being praised for it (something something when I used to fight you’d tell me I was brave etc. Even though I know that’s an entirely different situation but it’s also not) or at least being expected to do it, but the subject’s actions — or lack thereof— cut deeper than any of those lonesome fights. She keeps fighting for herself, trying to grow from the hurt, but his “blow” threatens to undo it all in one fell swoop.

Of course, as the song continues, the story expands and becomes one about miscommunication and apathy. I’m not one to believe that every single line in Taylor’s songs is literal; she’s a master at metaphors and scene setup, so as much as some commentary interprets the line about glaring and sending signals as literal and therefore putting the onus on her for not communicating effectively and expecting the person to be a mind reader, I feel like this is where her affinity for being flowery paints a far sadder picture.

She glared at him with storms in her eyes could mean she’s acting pissed but not saying why, but it could just as easily be a metaphor for sharing anger/upset with your partner who refuses to acknowledge its weight. (How can you say that you love someone you can’t tell is dyin’ when it’s right in front of you?) I sent you signals and bit my nails down to the quick could be seen as again not saying what’s wrong and expecting him to pick up on her behaviour, but I also feel it’s an instance where her penchant for emotive language is at play: it’s not that she expected him to read her mind, it’s that she tried every way she could and he still didn’t care. The signals could be that like a lighthouse in a storm: clear and guiding, but dangerous if ignored. She told him in all the ways she could, literal, emotional and physical, that she was wasting away, but he wouldn’t take it seriously. It once again details the experience of a person living through this tragedy completely on her own, whose pain is dismissed at every turn.

Which brings us to, “My face was gray but you wouldn’t admit that we were sick.” It could mean, she was making herself ill and he ignored the reasons why, but as I mentioned in my post earlier, death hangs over the entire song. (There’s a larger essay to be written about that theme alone.) To me, it’s not just that she’s grey because she’s ill, her face is grey because she’s (metaphorically) dead. She’s already died (or the relationship is dead) before he’s even admitted there was anything wrong to fix. She alone is sitting with this realization.

As the song continues, the loneliness with the burden of this knowledge shifts to the loneliness of everything she feels she’s done or felt that’s been ignored or dismissed.

My pain is an imposition. (On you.) I gave you all my best me’s. (And I didn’t get yours in return.) I bled and tried to be the bravest soldier only in your army frontlines. (But you didn’t fight in mine when I needed you.) I’m the best thing at this party. (But you’d never acknowledge I exist.)

By the time she gets to the end of the bridge, she’s fading fast but even as she’s losing the battle, she’s still imploring him to fight for her and them in a last-ditch effort. Show me you’re still with me. But she never gets that answer, because ultimately they’ve lost the pulse, and her heart has stopped. While the song begins with them fundamentally misunderstanding each other, it ends with her confirming her fears in the opening: there is no more we, but there is no more her either. She’s gone, all alone, without anyone there to see it.

In spite of the fact that the song is super catchy and uptempo, with a characteristic banger bridge that is fueled by anger and seeping with resentment, “You’re Losing Me,” is incredibly sad and kind of morose. It leaves such an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach, which I imagine is only a fraction of the feeling of the person experiencing the story is.

#me thinking too hard about taylor lyrics #lyrics analysis #taylor swift #Midnights #you’re losing me #writing letters addressed to the fire #Sadly i relate a lot of this song to my mother minus the marriage stuff lmao #it makes me so sad for Taylor because the feelings of loneliness pain and apathy in this song are just so heartbreaking #especially for someone shouldering it alone #and not to compare to current events #but it must be wild to feel some lightness after sitting with all this for so long #Again the death imagery is a lot and I don’t think I’m the person to discuss it #but it’s definitely A Thing

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kaylor · 8 months

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Idk if Taylor has always always been this literal in terms of the concept and the name of the album (maybe with speak now) idk i guess each album gets a bit of that but to me her entire explanation of this one being “this album is about those thoughts you have at midnight so my album is gonna be named midnights and in every single song i will used the word midnight, even tho sonically the album doesn’t make any fucking sense and it doesn’t look or even hear as an bum, because this album is set at midnight. It will come out at midnight because that’s the concept of the alb-“ and the fact that she claimed it’s a concept album, I’m crying laughing.

yeah i mean she's always been pretty literal with album titles tbh, like reputation was very on the nose but was just cool enough to work. lover/daylight again very basic on the nose, even though you have to respect the implications of referring to both yourself and your partner as Lovers on an album full of wedding imagery. it's still a bad album title but the implications.... 😈

folklore, 1989 and red, in that order, i think are her best album titles. folklore is exceptional because she is literally turning her life experiences into stories, warping them and disconnecting them from herself, but making them part of her own mythology anyway. no one will ever know the truth behind any of these stories, and no one ever should. they're folklore now, they're up to interpretation, and every swiftie will have a different version of taylor swift folklore in their minds. genius.

1989 is super cool because it's so mysterious, it gives nothing away beyond hey this music is inspired by 80s pop but it's also about myself but it's also not about myself anymore. it's like. this album is about rebirth, not as a person, but as an artist. the metanarrative about moving to new york to become herself + immediately solidifying her position as a pop behemoth, chefs fucking kiss.

red is great because, well, does it even need saying. the joni mitchell inspiration. the lipstick. the synesthetic emotional state of a fresh breakup. the literal colors in autumn. it shouldn't work, it should be super overdone, but it fucking works!!

on the flip side there's evermore, which to me is such a nothingtitle. it's very much a "we have all these b sides we have to call it something" vibe. no hate to evermore, there's some amazing tracks, but it's not an album it's a collection of songs. speak now is... fine i guess? very funny to title your album with a command to speak now when the album is full of songs you wrote because you did not speak then. again no hate to speak now because it's got many of my favorite songs on it, but it is only loosely cohesive as a unit because it's just a coming of age album. i would have to sit down and have a proper think about what i would have titled it.

and while we're here we may as well talk about fearless and self titled too. fearless is a good album title, it's very 2008, it's exactly what an 18 year old should be feeling, it perfectly captures the album. nothing groundbreaking, just decent and appropriate. i personally find it extremely boring for artists to name an album after themselves. i think it's uninspired, i think it's lazy, i think it should be illegal for artists to do this. i don't care how much you reinvented yourself or whatever, it's BORING. do better.

and then there's fucking Midnights. maybe the laziest concept ever conceived. it's literally just "i wrote a bunch of songs about my feelings" okay what's new? "i'm almost topless in the photoshoot" incredible no notes. but is the album interesting? hardly.

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godofsmallthings · 9 months

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least favorite tswift song and least favorite piece of ts discourse

least favorite ts song is afterglow (honorable mentions go to maroon and enchanted)

least favorite piece of discourse? oh my god how can i pick just one??? i think what annoys me the most rn is just this sort of assumption that your interpretation of who taylor is/your own fandom boundaries are The Most Correct and that everyone should think the same way as you. i see so much discourse that's just groups of people that have very different fundamental assumptions about taylor trying to make people see things the same way as they do, when that's ultimately impossible because they have different realities and truths. she wasn't joking about the mirrorball thing and i think a lot of people don't understand that their version of her is more of a reflection of themselves than anything else (which makes sense bc she feels like a real person in our heads and that's just not an intuitive or easy idea to internalize). but going off of this, my own personal fandom pet peeve lately has been people who base everything off the idea that taylor is this insecure, jealous, mean person and extrapolate this (imo quite harsh) idea of who she is into everything she does. situations like the olivia stuff felt like they really got out of hand with basically nothing to back any of it up to me and, especially when other ppl are dragged into it, it feels really annoying to me. but whatever, everyone's hashtag entitled to their own reality lmaooo this is just not one i care to participate in

#i definitely could've phrased that better but i'm sure ykwim #also ik i just was like lmaoooo everyone stop trying to argue with people who see things differently than you and then did just that #but that's the name of the game baby!!!!#i feel like it's totally fine to talk about but i just hate when it's clear ppl deliberately seek out these opinions to pick fights and make #themselves mad #it's rlly just not that deep at the end of the day #ask

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asteracaea · 9 months

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I feel like those references are so vague that I don’t even think the GP will catch on (if they even are about T). Also don’t think it’s big enough for T to even care about. Idk.

Side note and no hate to Olivia for this, but is it just me or does she kind of use phrases/lines that Taylor has had in her songs as well? This all feels a little weird to me

oh i hope you're right because i feel like the internet immediately decided who and what that song was about! i would love for them both to do something that puts this feud narrative to rest. it's just misogynistic when you boil it down.

i know what you mean and i find lots of parallel themes and imagery in olivia and taylor's songs but i think that's because these are experiences that young women go through. i have never had the feeling that olivia has copied taylor in any way. i've always felt that olivia writes about her own authentic experiences, and those experiences were similar to things taylor also went through. it's part of what makes both of their music so relatable and cathartic and beloved. LOTS of us have gone through, if not the same exact situation, very similar emotional experiences. and the way they write about them leaves room for listeners to interpret them how they will.

i've seen a lot of discourse today saying things like "has the world forgotten alanís morrisette existed? and fiona apple? joni mitchell and carly simon?" it's in response to certain groups who seem to insist that taylor invented the female experience (and was the first to write songs about it) and olivia is just copying her. yes, taylor changed the industry and the world in a lot of ways, but there were others who came before her. it seems that some people have a very limited exposure to artists, and history, and narrow views tend to result in drama.

several blogs i follow will often post thematic or lyrical parallels between taylor and other artists' songs, and it's always done in a loving, analytical way, exploring possible meaning and illuminate the listener's experience of the songs. it's never a criticism of copying. and that's how i feel when i notice parallels between tay and liv's songs. i have been wanting to point out the thematic similarities between vampire and dear john but i've been kind of afraid to draw any comparisons because of the negativity directed at olivia these days :( but it's so fascinating!! and maybe instead of criticizing, people could start saying "hey, why does this kind of thing keep happening to vulnerable young girls.... maybe we should do something about this..."

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balladtv · 11 months

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other than the 1975, fave lyrics from songs from different artists (analysis welcome)

-> drama a-level is fun but so weird exam wise, so good luck on whenever that exam is. i actually miss english lit a-level so much so im glad you're liking it :,)

ooo now this is interesting! i’ve chosen 3 artists that I also love reading into their lyrics — and I think we can all agree that it would be a crime not to include the lyric master herself… taylor swift;)

taylor swift — one of my favourite tay songs I would actually say upon a first listen you would categorise it as one of her ‘simpler’ pieces in terms of complexity, however when you do read the lyrics, I feel like it speaks (pun intended) a lot about taylor’s era at the time! and in honour of speak now (taylor’s version) — it’s ‘mean’! taylor has mastered her craft with creating a good balance between simple lyrics and what she means emotionally, an example being “words like knives” / “voice like nails on a chalkboard” and “all you’re ever gonna be is mean” — it balances those similes and the bluntness of the chorus amazingly, and it’s just so fun to listen to and delve and explore. speak now has always been a special album because she uses her music to communicate not only with us swifties (who love to read into everything), but also the idle gossip that she doesn’t write her own songs — the most girlboss move ever to then release an entirely self wrote album. now that is who taylor is. the special thing with taylor as well, or at least how I interpret the song, although she’s clearly talking about her own experiences, her lyrics don’t alienate the listener, because she knows that we relate. whether it be from bullying or anything else, “all you are is mean” also tells the listener that you are more than them, and your success is entirely up to you, not to the negative & mean people in your life! you are worth everything!

paramore — by also choosing paramore along with taylor, you are absolutely right in assuming that I am not okay after listening to ‘castles crumbling’. but we move! for paramore, I want to talk about ‘thick skull’ from their latest album ‘this is why’, because of the powerful lyrics along with hayley’s vocals and the instruments and just everything. although I’m obviously a massive the 1975 fan, I will admit that I think ‘thick skull’ is the strongest ending compared to recent albums that have been released, and although ‘when we are together’ is a strong end to ‘bfiafl’, I think ‘thick skull’ takes the crown. ‘this is why’ as an entire album has some of the strongest lyrics I’ve ever had the pleasure of listening to, so just narrowing this down has been insanely difficult. “I am a magnet for broken pieces” firstly sets up that dire atmosphere along with the low, slow introduction in the music itself. I love music that feels like an experience (clearly from my other analysis’) and this is exactly what the song feels like. it’s simple and effective (my favourite combination). straight off the back of that, “I am attracted to broken people” although reflects the same atmosphere, my reaction has always been relatableeeeeee. finally, the obvious “thick skull never did nothing for me” is so emotional and hard hitting, yet also liberating for hayley herself, stating that they’re ‘self indulgent’ and ‘healing’, making the song an absolutely emotional pleasure to listen to.

the japanese house — my favourite album of the year, ‘in the end it always does’ has produced some seriously genre changing and revolutionary songs. trust me when I say this album is life changing! one of the songs I think is slept on from the album is ‘over there’, next to ‘sunshine baby’ as my favourites. I am currently absolutely obsessed with amber, so I wanted to look at the chorus in particular. like I mentioned previously, songs that feel like an experience are the best, and the masterful layering of the vocals is really what gets me throughout the entire album — it is absolutely beautiful. “where do you wanna go? did you wanna get some air? do you like it over there?” by having the chorus limited to interrogative sentences, it really helps create that isolation and separation that comes from not knowing someone anymore (specifically through a breakup). it starts off almost hopeful and receptive with “where do you wanna go?”, willing, before acknowledging that development through “do you like it over there?” / “over there?” — now completely limited.

hopefully all of that made sense, definitely weird to not be talking about the 1975 but super fun nonetheless! and also thank you very much, shouldn’t be too bad hopefully and gonna savour the time before exams this year and actually kick my butt to revise super early.

(adding this gif because I think it’s appropriate)

#taylor swift #taylornation #the eras tour #speak now #speak now (taylor’s version)#sntv #hayley williams #paramore #this is why #the japanese house #amber bain #in the end it always does #balladtvtalks

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ts1989fanatic · 1 year

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Comparing Taylor Swift to William Shakespeare

What do Taylor Swift and William Shakespeare have in common? More than you might think, it turns out.

There's even a Buzzfeed quiz comparing her lyrics with lines from Shakespeare's poems.

Eminent Shakespeare scholar and former Oxford professor Sir Jonathan Bate, who is quite the Swiftie himself, got them all right.

So, who better to speak on the matter.

In a bookstore, 25 minutes south of where the Beatles were born Bate had an unexpected encounter with a modern interpretation of Romeo and Juliet.

The lyrics of Taylor Swift's Love Story, about a girl on a balcony and a boy who comes to rescue him, had captured his attention.

"I went up to the counter and said to the girl behind it, oh that's a great song, who's it by, and she said... this country and western artist Taylor Swift... so I bought the CD - those were the days of CDs - and gave it to my daughter who was nine I think and she gave it to all her friends," Bate told RNZ Afternoons.

"They sort of became lifelong Swifties so I kind of followed along."

Bate argues Swift is more than just a best selling pop star - she has a literary sensibility worthy of some of history's great writers.

"A lot of my work over the years... has been about how Shakespeare stays alive by being reinvented on all sorts of different cultural media."

The poet John Keats - also a big Shakespeare fan but who lived in the wrong century to test his loyalty to Swift - says poetry is "a wording of our highest thoughts, almost a remembrance".

"In other words, what a great poet does is they put into words feelings that we've all had but that we've not quite been able to articulate," Bate says.

"That's what Shakespeare did for his generation and it seems to me that is what Taylor swift is doing for a whole generation of young people."

"There's no doubt she has a very literary sensibility" - Eminent Shakespeare scholar Sir Jonathan Bate duration 19′ :50″ Playlist Download

"There's no doubt she has a very literary sensibility" - Eminent Shakespeare scholar Sir Jonathan Bate

There are of course areas where the pair differ.

"There's no doubt that Shakespeare was very very discrete about his own feelings and his own ideas."

Every feeling expressed belongs to a character, not to Shakespeare himself, Bate says.

Even when he wrote seemingly more autobiographically in his sonnets, he doesn't let on who he is talking about, he says.

"Maybe that is because he was bisexual because the majority of those sonnets do seem to be addressed to a beautiful young man."

It is a far cry from Taylor Swift, who has used her own life and successive heart breaks as sources for her work.

"My Taylor Swift journey took a bit of a pause when she started rocking and rapping, which isn't really my thing."

It was reignited, Bate says, when Folklore and Evermore were released.

"I started listening to the lyrics particularly of one of the songs in which she goes to the Lake District in the north west of England and actually mentions William Wordsworth, the great English romantic poet.

"That got me looking more closely at her lyrics and seeing that there's a whole set of references in her work to that romantic poetic tradition.

"There's no doubt she has a very literary sensibility."

True Swifties would have picked up on an easter egg too, Bate says - Evermore was announced on 10 Dec, the birthday of the romantic poet Emily Dickinson.

Bate says there's a famous Emily Dickinson poem about a love triangle, with the following lines:

I spilt the dew -

But took the morn, -

I chose this single star

From out the wide night's numbers -

Sue - forevermore!

"I'm pretty sure that's what inspired her to write the title song of Evermore."

The domination of visual platforms like Instagram and YouTube means in some ways, we are losing the sense of the power of words, Bate says.

"So I think when you have a popular artist like Taylor Swift who chooses words so carefully, who genuinely produces poetry in her lyrics, that's an enormously powerful, reassuring positive thing."

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celestialmaison · 2 years

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i think there’s something to be said about paramore’s first release since 2017 being about consequences, perception, anxiety and language.

when hayley sings “this is why i don’t leave the house” she never directly elaborates on what this is—it’s very purposefully (i think) left open to interpretation so whoever is listening can insert their own this without having to elaborate to anyone else. hayley has her own this, zac has his own this, and taylor has his own this. they share a few this’ and some of them are completely unique to each band member. “you say the coast is clear, but you won’t catch me out” can resonate with anyone again depending on what their this is and what coast they need to be cleared to feel safe to exit their safe space. hayley also doesn’t nail down what people should do with their opinions—their language—but she does suggest that you can shove it, scream it, or keep it depending on what it is meaning: use discretion before you speak (something far too many westerners in particular never learn how to do even into their old age moving on).

this is why orbits around this very real anxiety of experiencing consequences for (insert your own reason the song is neutral in certain aspects for a reason) and being perceived. hayley is out minding her business near the water when suddenly she’s aware that she’s being filmed, zac is restless even in his “home” bc he is constantly surveyed, taylor is having a peaceful (?) reflective moment on the roof and then there’s a camera and some people there like. even in the “middle of nowhere” they can’t get away from the media. and the scenes where the camera is the only thing watching them and the people are gone are so fucking important because even having a device that can record them around without someone to control it is unsettling for all three of them. they feel like they always have to perform and be on for others.

“one step beyond your door, might as well have been a free fall” is straightforward as all living fuck but it still hits. when hayley falls out of her “home” (where she appears to live alone and even has a completely different hairstyle from her classic red in the rest of the video and “draws her lipstick wider than her mouth” fake happy enthusiasts are living their best lives) there is no one there to catch her. when the scene cuts to taylor and zac, they catch her not once but twice. whenever they’re around, they always make sure to help her up again. and when the “filmmakers” (the media) record zac and taylor catching hayley, they tell them to do it again, and the band kinda just stands there for a moment like “why?” hayley fell because she was struggling with something, zac and taylor helped her stand up again, and now the media wants a replay, they want a recap about something possibly extremely personal with more details. the first time the boys catch hayley, it’s a darker close shot. the second time, it’s a lighter distanced shot. depending on who’s watching, it could look like anything. this is why hayley doesn’t leave the house, kids.

#paramore #pmore #this is why #tiw #paramore this is why #paramore text posts #also the fact tht hayley was just vibing in her house at the end #and the moment she realizes she’s being recorded she draws more lipstick on her face #this is CINEMA people

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cloudslou · 2 years

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okkkk sooooo let's go, brace yourself it's gonna be a long rant. (also sorry if i don't make sense, english isn't my first language)

i am a larrie too and most people i follow here are larries bc i kinda feel like they're a safe space you know? BUT the fandom can be so fucking tiring and annoying sometimes. not everything louis and harry do have to do with larry and that's okay!!!!!! (i know saying something like that can get you dragged to hell in this fandom...anyways. lol) not everything is an easter egg. not everything has to be interpreted (?) a certain way. i know it's fun to find little things in their music that are connected, i get the thrill. but sometimes it's too much, the fandom makes the most out of too little things and it's so ??????. my issue is mostly with how some people in the fandom view louis and his ideas and themes and stuff. let him have his fucking moment without connecting EVERYTHING, every single little detail of his art to harry. they are their own individuals and they have their own career and they make their own art. there are connections and parallels, someone has to be dumb not to see them but sometimes it's good to let them have something for themselves each. - i.e. i saw someone making the fitf ono about how harry had one too and blah blah married yeah we get it!!!!! but what the FUCK does louis promoting his album have to do with harry? what the hell does louis having one, two, whatever special concerts to promote his album have to do with harry? it's like, louis follows every step harry takes (i'm always speaking in terms of their career and art), he does whatever harry does, he doesn't have creative freedom (? not the right phrase but idk how else to say it sorry). it's like some people see his work as a copy of harry's, you know what i mean? this is not meant to be sorry for louis or to pity him, i know he hates that and i know you do too. it's more like, louis is his own person, OUTSIDE of the relationship!!! (as is harry of course), not everything he does has to be depended on the relationship or his partner, he has his own mind, his own ideas, his own creativity. he doesn't have to have anyone as a "step" where he has to be on to build his career (does that make sense?). he's gaining sooooooo much popularity and recognition, i know walls was successful, but this era is on another level. let him fucking have this for HIMSELF. he did that HIMSELF. it's kinda unfair to take that away from him by implying that everything he does has to do with anyone but him.

anyway, this is where the rant ends. didn't wanna make a post about it bc as i said, saying this stuff can get you dragged to hell in this fandom bc let's be honest, there are certain opinions that apparently everyone has to have. thank you for your time and patience. post it if you want, or not idk. of course i'd love to hear your opinion on this. byyeeeeee <3

anon im so glad u came back i was hoping to see a msg from u when i got home from class.

i think im largely on the same page as you!!! i consider myself a larrie and thats mainly who i follow and who my friends r, like thats my Circle in the fandom, but it can be very exhausting when its the only lens ppl use to look at their art. not only is it just a tad annoying, i think its pretty dismissive and reductive to take that approach every time. i have similar feelings abt taylor when ppl jump to immediately connect a song to her public life story and then dont go further. for me its like.... there is so much more to a song (or any piece of art) than its "true" meaning (and i say that liberally because even when larries connect on of hl's songs to the other or their real lives, this is no more "true" than connecting a song to a girlfriend, etc, i think there's too much certainty by fans in this fandom) and it limits ur enjoyment of a song i think to not push to break out of that box.

also i think people drawing connections between career stuff is mostly. connecting dots that arent there. one-off concerts are not a rarity and theres already differences in their album release shows. i dont follow many musicians super closely, but i believe ashe also had an album release show last month. and (iirc) lthq said these shows will be a mix of songs from walls and fitf (so it wont be a straight through play of the album like harry's ono show are).

#ask #anon #like u said #i like the thrill #but the thrill doesnt belong to.....everything

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inthemelancholymoonlight · 2 years

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a little bit about me, the fic, and this blog

Hi, hello! Welcome to my little blog for In the Melancholy Moonlight! I'm guessing most if not all of you are here because you read my story, so thank you for that! For those of you who might have just happened to stumble across this blog, welcome to you too! Here is a little introduction to me, the story, and the blog, for whoever has found this little corner of the internet:

The first chapter of In the Melancholy Moonlight was posted on March 28, 2020. It's been a long two and half(ish) years for everyone. I started this story as a means of coping with the world, and it's saved my life several times over. Bringing this story to life brings me so much joy, and I hope it brings you joy too. :)

Nicknames for this fic include IMM and Moonlight, depending on who you ask. Feel free to make up your own, if you'd like. Nicknames for me are few and far between, so feel free to make up your own for me as well.

My username comes from the song "Pluto" by Sleeping At Last, which is, ironically, not my favorite song. That title goes to "Neptune," also by Sleeping At Last, but "Pluto" is a masterpiece and I chose that username because the full lyric is "Show me where my armor ends / Show me where my skin begins" and this story (and fanfic and fandom in general) has allowed me to explore the more vulnerable parts of myself and given me the courage to share with the world.

IMM is the story of Lucy Everlin Diggory. We begin our journey with her on August 25, 1991, and while I don't have a definite end date for this story, we will follow her story for over a decade. It's a massive fic and it will only grow from here, but I hope you will find it to be worth your time. There are many twists and turns. It is largely canon-compliant from 1991 to 1998, but epilogue? What epilogue? Besides, JKR sucks. I've taken many a liberty with her original work, and I will take many, many, many, MANY more before I'm through.

JKR sucks. Again. I just want to make that very clear. This story is a safe space for you, no matter who you are. Hatred has no place here.

I'm an aroace author, so please kind of just assume that all characters are aroace until it is stated otherwise. Again, I begin this fic in 1991, when they are all CHILDREN, so when I say this story is a slow burn, I mean it. That being said, this fic is diverse. I don't go into explicit detail of how many characters look, so it's truly open to interpretation. As far as sexuality and gender goes for my characters, that's open to interpretation too. Everyone is welcome here. If something resonates with you, claim it as yours. Everyone is safe and celebrated here. I promise.

This blog is going to be a place where I can talk about the fic. I have many thoughts in my head at all times, and I wanted a place where I could talk about it with anybody who is interested in hearing me talk about it. (Currently, I ramble a lot on my Quotev account. A lot of people who follow me read the fic, but not everyone does, so I feel kind of bad about that. Hence this blog!)

The ask box is always open! Please interact with me! I am quite lonely a lot of the time! I love talking about this fic! I am always happy to talk about anything else too! (My other interests are anything and everything Middle Earth, Narnia, Supernatural, ATLA, Percy Jackson, Sleeping At Last, Taylor Swift, English in general, I'm currently watching Parks and Rec for the first time, et cetera, et cetera. I will talk about anything.)

Oh, and I am a Marauders fan! I'd love to write a proper Marauders fic one day, but in the meantime, I do my best to include little Marauders moments even in this 90s-era story.

Thank you for reading this far, if you did! Sorry for such a long first post, but again, I have many thoughts in my head at all times and I wanted to properly fully introduce myself, the fic, and this blog. I hope you enjoy!

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and-im-yours-to-lose · 2 years

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If you're going for every song is somewhat truthful you're going to have to acknowledge how many mention men and he/him pronouns, as well as match up with relationship details we know about her relationships

With breakup songs- a lot of people write them looking back- creative people can access past pain. They aren't necessarily living it

You're also going to have to worry she's actually a murderer

Just seems weird to be like 'illicit affairs and post rep breakup songs are 100% true! It's only logical to base arguments off them! Ignore any song that doesn't fit my narrative'

You've picked the least likely songs to be 'real' (and ignored what she said. About her own work. Just as you ignore what she says about her own life, relationships and not being in the community)

I'm sorry, I didn't brought up the songs... I know her songs are not completely truthful, ex: she uses he/him pronouns a lot.

and she has to match her lyrics to her public relationships so it doesn't raise questions that may hurt her brand and the relatable and truthful song writer that she is known as. the drama of it all was part of her success at the beginning of her career, and it's important to this day because hey, what would paper rings be if she wasn't in a loving, super private relationship with Joe?

it does seem weird to be like "illicit affairs and every break up song after rep is 100% true" doesn't it? but I never said that, I said that if paper rings was going to be use to fit your narrative then it was just as valid to use any other song. I was trying to point out that using her songs as justification of which speculations were valid and which ones weren't was a dumb thing to do, because her songs are either a perfect map of her personal life and she in fact did kill a man because that man killed Este or her songs are up for interpretation, which is what most gaylors do but since our interpretations bother you for some reason you think you can decide which songs are more or "least likely to be real"

and the fact that I don't take Taylor's work like the word of God (because guess what lying and Easter eggs are her brand) doesn't mean I ignore what she said, actually I never said that her relationship was fake

I clearly said that the rumors about her relationship being a pr relationship were as 'weird' as the rumors of her being already married... so not weird at all, just something that comes with fame

and I won't get tired of repeating myself, she never said she wasn't a part of the community, she implied it

in the same way she implied that gay pride was something as integral to her identity as western boots lol

#taylor swift #gaylor #anonymous asks

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allamericansbitch · 2 years

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hi, I think it's ridiculous that you're getting hate and i think it's safe to assume those people sending the hate come back to check your blog a lot so this ask is a little more towards them than it is you (but please add anything you agree or disagree with). I think in general with gaylors there seems to be a variety from people who are queer and relate to taylors music (which is why I have thought it meant too) to those that are trying to prove taylor is queer when she has said she's not apart of the community herself and I guess like when you replied to certain asks and used the term gaylors, the former might have misinterpreted and though you meant them when you were talking about the more invasive ones who try to prove she's queer. I think especially on tiktok there's been a surge of the gaylor fandom because I saw a video of people explaining swiftgron and wonderland and I guess one thing about this fandom is that when it comes to interpreting music there seems to be a lot of swifities who are quite strict. I know Taylor is songwriter first and yeah a lot of her music is autobiographical and so there are certain swifities who swear only by what she's written and don't allow others to interpret her lyrics from their own perspective and when you are queer and relate her lyrics to yourself and those fans say your wrong it does make you feel invalidated especially if you were talking about your personal life. I think taylors music is so easily interpreted and related by queers because so many of her themes are relatable for queers like the secret or having to hide your relationship themes that run through her love songs which from taylors perspective is because of the paps not because she's queer and the best example is her an Aaron talking about peace when she's talking about the paps and he talks about his mh and she didn't realise that that's what he loved about the song. I think the fandom in general needs to allow for people to freely suggest their interpretations of her music and not just discredit them because it's not what taylor wrote about (I have had this happen to me not from a queer perspective but certain songs I interpret them as being from a parents perspective but I've had other swifities say that's not at all what the song is about because of specific lyrics and sure if we want to nitpick she didn't write it about my parents in particular but that doesn't mean I'm wrong about what her music feels like or anyone else is right) I think the way some people discredit interpretations of songs combined with swifities who play detective about her known relationships and the specific moments that she writes about in her songs (I remember after atw10 pap photos of them arguing in the car resurfaced against the short film scenes and all of it felt icky to me to drag it all up) all of this does lead to defensive gaylors who feel like they also need to play detective and nitpick her moments with friends to validate the interpretation they have of her songs (this is what I feel is the swifitie culture and then theres wider stan culture issue of shipping real life people which is ew and invasive leads to all this discourse) and I think if both sides gaylors and non gaylors stop with this nitpicking and solely trying to prove or work out every specific details taylor writes about and just allow for people to discuss what her art makes them feel everyone would just be able to get along

thank you for taking the time to send this and be so thorough with you're reasoning/explanation. i've definitely seen a lot of the behavior you spoke about and agree.

i've made it very clear that i've never had any issue with people interpreting taylor's lyrics to their own personal life and their queer identity. that's what music is all about, making it you're own and finding relatability to it. taylor herself said it best when she said 'these songs were once about my life, now they are about yours'.

perfect example is the song seven. i've seen a lot of people in the community say it represents being queer to them because of the closet line. i've seen other people say that the song represents childhood trauma. i think it's beautiful that one single song can mean very different things to different people simply based on their own personal story and i have absolutely no issue with either interpretation.

what i do take issue with is people crossing the line into taylor's personal life and her relationships, with men or with women or whoever really. that always rubs me the wrong way. crossing that line and absolutely insisting that a song is about one specific person and people having arguments about whether it's this guy or this girl feels like it's completely invalidating her work in songwriting/creating and just making it about her personal life. i completely relate to seeing those pap photos when atw10 came out and it made me so angry. taylor herself has said she hates those slideshows people use of all of her significate others because it makes it for the general publics entertainment. whenever i would see those slideshows about what whatever specific line means i would think 'why does this even matter'. whether it was a gaylor trying to prove it was about karlie or whoever, or about jake or whoever... neither matters. make the song about your life not hers. her life isnt meant to be dissected for arguments sake to prove someone on the internet who doesn't even know hers' point.

#answered #anonymous

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thatonehypnokid · 7 days

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'Cassandra' by Taylor Swift is actually from the point of view Clytemnestra, in this essay I will-

Maybe not an essay but some in-depth lyrical analysis instead:

'I was in my new house placing daydreams' It's her house while Agamemnon is at war, and she tries to make it into the perfect house of her dream - she is in charge now

Patching up the crack along the wall She's trying to keep her family - Electra and Orestes - together, even though it's become irreparably broken with the death of Iphigenia and with Agamemnon going to war

I pass it and lose track of what I'm saying 'Cause that's where I was when I got the call Clytemnestra has a system of fires set up specifically to tell her when the Trojan War is ended and her husband's coming home - this 'call' is the beginning of the end for her

When the first stone's thrown, there's screaming In the streets, there's a raging riot When it's "Burn the bitch, " they're shrieking I mean, 'bitch' for Clytemnestra? Need I say more? The woman who has been portrayed time and time again as a cruel, inhumane woman who kills her war-hero of a husband? Everyone in her story hates her and everyone who hears her story hates her

When the truth comes out, it's quiet A few interpretations here - firstly, everyone being quiet about the death of Iphigenia - they don't mention what Agamemnon did to start the war, instead letting it be forgotten to time, and being quiet if Clytemnestra ever does bring it up. Then, quiet in the way that the Chorus simply commentates as she kills her husband, only to do and say nothing to her face about it

So, they killed Cassandra first 'cause she feared the worst And tried to tell the town This line fits less well in that it is 'they' who killed Cassandra, but some sources state that is Aegisthus who murders her, whilst it could also be seen as a more general commentary on how Cassandra's phrophesysing led to her destruction, mentally and physically

So, they filled my cell with snakes, I regret to say Do you believe me now? LITERALLY - need I say more??? Her husband betrayed her by killing their child and if that doesn't make him a snake I don't know what does - and then her very own children turned against her.

I was in my tower weaving nightmares Twisting all my smiles into snarls They say, "What doesn't kill you makes you aware What happens if it becomes who you are?" Clytemnestra goes from being a princess of Sparta, sister to beautiful Helen, to wife of a man who has no qualms over killing their child - she becomes mean because she has to be to avenge her daughter's murder

They knew, they knew, they knew the whole time That I was onto something The family, the pure greed, the Christian chorus line They all said nothing No one stood by her as her daughter was murdered - Clytemnestra was literally the one to lead her daughter to the camp, thinking it was for a wedding, only to discover Iphigenia was a lamb meant for slaughter. The Greek chorus doesn't act to save Cassandra or Clytemnestra - they just watch and commentate, without taking any actions or supporting anyone through deeds instead of words.

Blood's thick but nothing like a payroll Because family meant less to Agamemnon than fighting a war over a woman, and the wealth and glory he could steal from that battle.

Bet they never spared a prayer for my soul Because although her daughter was sacrificed to the gods, what good did it do her? Clytemnestra, who was, instead, doomed by the fights, to be murdered by her own son.

TO SURMISE - I don't think T. Swift actually intended for this song to be read this way but I love Clytemnestra so much so I couldn't help but hear her story in between the lines.

#rip clytemnestra they could never make me hate you #classical allusions in taylor swift songs will be the death of me #taylor swift #clytemnestra #cassandra #the oresteia

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tillidontneedfantasy · 3 years

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A Track-by-Track Breakdown of Taylor Swift’s 9th Studio Album: ‘evermore’

“My collaborators and I are proud to announce that my 9th studio album and folklore’s sister record is here. It’s called evermore,” is how Taylor Swift introduces us to this album in its foreword. One might assume a “sister record” would entail b-sides, or tracks that didn’t quite make the cut for folklore, despite Taylor’s explanation that “we just couldn’t stop writing songs.” evermore’s release came at a strange time, upon the heels of the Folklore: Long Pond Studio Sessions film on Disney+, as well as 5 Grammy nominations for folklore. The world still captivated by folklore, it’s understandable why one might not consume evermore as critically. Even as a die-hard fan, I felt some whiplash by this announcement; I am still processing folklore! Hell, I’m still processing reputation!

If this was the Taylor from two years ago, this may have been a big enough fear of hers to hold off on releasing evermore. But as she explained upon folklore’s surprise release, life is too unpredictable now, and there are zero givens or guarantees. So she followed the same path this time (although making sure it fell in line with her birthday weekend). But it’s not just the strategic timing of the release that she’s thrown out the window for now, but also her mindset whilst making records. As she explains in the evermore album foreword,

“I’ve never done this before. In the past I’ve always treated albums as one-off eras and moved onto planning the next one as soon as an album was released. There was something different with folklore. In making it, I felt less like I was departing and more like I was returning. I loved the escapism I found in these imaginary/not imaginary tales. I loved the ways you welcomed the dreamscapes and tragedies and epic tales of love lost and found. So I just kept writing them.”

This is a revelation for Swift, to let the music lead her into artistic freedom, which is what makes evermore such a triumphant return. Truly folklore’s sister record, Taylor wrote evermore with the same creative team: Aaron Dessner of The National (Swift’s favorite band), long-time pal and collaborator Jack Antonoff, Justin Vernon of Bon Iver, and William Bowery aka Swift’s boyfriend, Joe Alwyn (as officially revealed in the Long Pond Studio Sessions). Additionally, former 1989 tour openers and close friends of Taylor, the HAIM sisters, join the crew, along with Marcus Mumford for some dreamy backup vocals.

The production is just as wistful and mesmerizing as it was on folklore, yet the storytelling on evermore is kicked up a notch, expanding on the topics and worldbuilding established in its sister record, with even sharper lyrics and an effective and elaborate use of alliteration. The best thing about Taylor is that no matter what she does, her masterful lyricism is always at the heart of her art, and somehow, she keeps getting better. Once again, I wanted to explore the rich stories she’s crafted in this woodsy universe. This is how I’ve interpreted the album, but I hope you find your own meaning in the songs as well.

1. willow It is fitting that the opening track to folklore’s sister album, where we wade further into the forest that is Taylor Swift’s imagination and storytelling, would center on the type of tree that is a symbol of hope, belonging, safety, stability, and healing. “willow,” one of the few more obviously autobiographical tracks on the album, is a hymn of gratitude for her man (as she wants you to know, yes, thirteen times), Joe Alwyn, and how the invisible string tethering them together pulled her to him in a time when everyone else was counting her out. Though not as present on many of the other songs later to come on this record, you can feel the lightness in her heart on this song as she embraces the way in which the willow has bent, wrecking her plans, throwing her into the water and leaving her happily lost and afloat in his current. The downward key modulation throughout the last two repetitions of the chorus is beautiful and very fitting for Swift vocally, but also sounds like the feeling of finding your comfort and settling into it, basking it in while you wait for the next place the wind pulls you. Best lyric: “Now this is an open/shut case / I guess I should’ve known from the look on your face / Every bait and switch was a work of art.”

2. champagne problems On the second track of the album, Taylor dives back into the fictional worldbuilding she began to explore on folklore. While on folklore high school relationships and dramatics took center-stage, evermore graduates from adolescence to young adulthood, not that it is any easier emotionally on the listener’s heart. “champagne problems” chronicles a rejected marriage proposal between two college sweethearts at their old dorm building. Taylor sings as the narrator, a reflective, self-deprecating young woman who jokes about belonging in a madhouse and dismisses all her turmoil as champagne problems. The term ‘champagne problems’ itself could have various meanings here: their trivial concerns, the fact that their “sister splashed out on the bottle” of champagne that they will not be using to celebrate as they had hoped, or perhaps it could even hint that excessive drinking is a piece of all the ways the narrator is “fucked in the head,” as they said. Although the person she is singing to is the one who got hurt in the story, the hurt in the narrator’s heart is just as palpable and relatable, because you only have yourself to blame when you self-destruct. Best lyric: “’She would’ve made such a lovely bride, / what a shame she’s fucked in the head,’ they said / but you’ll find the real thing instead / she’ll patch up your tapestry that I shred.”

3. gold rush On her YouTube live chat prior to the album’s release, Taylor explained that this song “takes place inside a single daydream where you get lost in thought for a minute and then snap out of it.” The daydream consists of a love story so pure that the town had never seen such a thing; it could only happen in a fantasy for the narrator. How could she possibly have the gall to call them out on their contrarian shit, or end up with her Eagles t-shirt hanging from their door, when they are so coveted by all, and when she cannot withstand the thought of even competing? She sings, “My mind turns your life into folklore / I can’t dare to dream about you anymore,” a sweet little connecting piece to this album’s older sister, effectively convincing herself out of the idea of jumping into the chaos of the gold rush because even inside her own imagination it’s too dangerous. Best lyric: “I don’t like that falling feels like flying ‘till the bone crush.”

4. ‘tis the damn season According to Aaron Dessner, Taylor had written the lyrics for “’tis the damn season” in the middle of the night amidst their Folklore: The Long Pond Studio Sessions recording after a long night of chatting and drinking with their co-conspirator, Jack Antonoff. The lyrics perfectly encapsulate the guttural ache the track evokes. It is a tale of two people who always find their way back to one another in their hometown, which acts as the ever-returning fork in the road. The path taken, back to L.A. in pursuit of her dreams, is the one she chose and continues to choose, but whenever she returns home, she takes a ride down the road not taken, just to get a taste of what could have been, even if just for the weekend. What starts off as an icy homecoming always transforms into the warmest intimacy. The success of this track is aligned with the success of Taylor’s entire career; even with such specific details, it feels so deeply personal to the listener. You know the street you’d drive along late at night laughing, the spot you’d park the car, the person who stars in every what-if. You will never really know if the road not taken is as good as it seems, but that might be ok; sometimes, the fantasy is better than the reality, anyway. Best lyric: “It’s the kind of cold / fogs up windshield glass, but I felt it when I passed you / There’s an ache in you / put there by the ache in me.”

5. tolerate it Inspired by the novel Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier, “tolerate it” is an agonizing track from the perspective of a devoted wife who polishes plates and paints portraits and waits by the door for her husband with a battle hero’s welcome, who at best tolerates all her adoration. There are few things as painful as idolization being met with indifference, when you have all this love to give to someone who just leaves it there untouched. “tolerate it” captures that desperation for the approval you know will never arrive, but you sit and watch, waiting for it just in case you’re wrong, but you know you’re not. Best lyric: “I made you my temple, my mural, my sky / now I’m begging for footnotes in the story of your life / drawing hearts in the byline”

6. no body, no crime feat. HAIM “no body, no crime,” the one evermore song solo-written by Taylor, has the clearest plot from beginning to end. In the same vein as the female powerhouse country classic “Goodbye Earl” by The Chicks, Taylor is out for blood to avenge her friend, Este (named for one of the HAIM sisters). The story goes as such: Este’s husband kills her for calling him out on his infidelity, and then Taylor kills the husband and frames his mistress. The HAIM girls, who are long-time friends of Taylor’s and former touring mates, lend their vocals to reinforce the accusation on the husband and to provide Taylor’s alibi. “no body, no crime” is so far the closest we’ve gotten to a return to “country Taylor,” proving that she is still the master of a killer country tune (yes, pun intended, it had to be done I’m sorry). Best lyric: “Good thing Este’s sister’s gonna swear she was with me / (she was with me, dude) / Good thing his mistress took out a big life insurance policy”

7. happiness Written a week before the album’s release, “happiness” is one of Swift’s strongest and most reflective breakup songs. Although she writes it as though it is recent, there’s a lot of power in knowing that she’s been happily in love for four years, and that she is even better now at doing the thing that has always been best at. She is finally “above the trees,” as she sings, and is able to see it all for what it is, but her character is still in the heat of it all, trying to navigate the stages of grief when a relationship ends. We see the narrator grapple with many of those stages throughout the song. Most striking is the anger displayed in the second verse when she sings: “I hope she’ll be a beautiful fool who takes my spot next to you / No, I didn’t mean that, / sorry, I can’t see facts through all of my fury.” That section is jarring and feels like one of the most honest moments in a Taylor song, the insanely difficult emotional balancing act when we are grieving a relationship. The devastation of loss can distort our perception, and a part of that is the difficulty of understanding how multiple seemingly opposing things can co-exist in our hearts, such as happiness because of someone and happiness after them. But when you leave it all behind and finally find your place above the trees, you can find happiness after someone and also look back and appreciate the happiness they once provided. Both of these things can be true. Best lyric: “Showed you all of my hiding spots / I was dancing when the music stopped.”

8. dorothea Taylor Swift has the uncanny ability to create such developed and well-rounded characters with such little information, which is what makes her storytelling so compelling. In “dorothea,” we learn much about the title character through the narrator’s eyes, and the relationship they once had. The lyric “skipping the prom just to piss off your mom and her pageant schemes” alone tells an entire story in itself. “dorothea” is also the companion song to “’tis the damn season,” just from the other person’s perspective, which helps shine even more light on the story. The narrator of “dorothea” reveres her but wonders if she’s still the same soul in L.A. as she was back in their never-changing town. Whatever the answer, they’re still willing to support her no matter where she is, but she’s always welcome back in Tupelo by her hometown love’s side if she ever just wants to be herself rather than someone known for who they know. Besides, they’re the only soul who can tell which smiles she’s faking. And you can always return to the road not taken. Best lyric: “They all wanna be ya / but are you still the same soul I met under the bleachers? / Well, I guess I’ll never know / and you’ll go on with the show.”

9. coney island feat. The National What really started the folklore / evermore journey was Taylor’s love for The National. Taylor has cited them as one of her favorite bands for many years, and as we know, this led to her beautiful new collaborative relationship with Aaron Dessner. So it would make sense for the track written with the intention of this duet to be so well executed; you can feel the love and care Taylor put into writing this song. In her press for these sister albums, she has spoken about trying to channel frontman Matt Berninger’s writing style. But what actually happened was she just produced her own signature lyricism at its sharpest. “We were like the mall before the internet, it was the one place to be / the mischief, the gift-wrapped suburban dreams / sorry for not winning you an arcade ring over and over,” is a hall of famer Swift-ian lyric. “coney island” explores the confusion, hurt, and self-reflection when a passionate affair burns out fast because you did not prioritize that person. And to top it off, Swift and Berninger’s harmonies are achingly beautiful, transporting you right there in the story, on the bench, wondering, over and over. Best lyric: “Do you miss the rogue who coaxed you into paradise and left you there? / Will you forgive my soul when you’re too wise to trust me and too old to care?”

10. ivy Leave it to Taylor Swift to make a song about an affair sound so romantic, and so sympathetic to the narrator, that you’re rooting for adultery. “ivy” tells the tale of a woman in a lifeless marriage, likening her home with him to the tombstone that the widow in town visits each day. I like to think this is the same wife whose husband was out there building other worlds without her in “tolerate it,” because then that means she found someone who celebrates her love, who holds her pain for her, who blooms all over her; they started it, but she’s fighting for it all the way to the end, nonetheless. “ivy” showcases Swift’s gorgeous vocals and her sharp lyrics, with a melody so infectious it is bound to permanently plant its roots in your dreamland. Best lyric: “Oh, I can’t stop you putting roots in my dreamland / my house of stone, your ivy grows, and now I’m covered in you.”

11. cowboy like me With the beautifully blended backing vocals of Marcus Mumford, “cowboy like me” is an entrancing love story of two con artists who lost at their own game and got conned into forever with each other. She’d gone from swindling old men for their money and fancy cars to falling victim to the danger of dancing with someone who only has eyes full of stars, and she knows she’ll pay for it. “cowboy like me” is one of the most romantic tracks on the record, proving that life never plays out quite as we plan. Best lyric: “Now you hang from my lips like the gardens of Babylon / with your boots beneath my bed / Forever is the sweetest con.”

12. long story short One of the more pop-sounding tracks on evermore, “long story short” is pretty much a summary of the long story behind reputation (2017). The song is filled with various metaphors for her reputation crumbling around her, and then finally putting her defenses down to be with her lover, someone as “rare as the glimmer of a comet in the sky.” It is a sweet ode to her boyfriend, and a gentle comfort to her past self that it will all work out. But it is also an oddly relatable example of how we shrug off our struggles and minimize them to just a “bad time,” when the time she is singing about was obviously something that deeply affected her (as will be further explored in the title track); but sometimes it actually feels good to just shrug it off as just a blip in your life, because at the end of the day, you survived, and that’s what counts- even if you’re not keeping score anymore. Best lyric: “Pushed from the precipice / clung to the nearest lips / long story short, it was the wrong guy. / Now I’m all about you.”

13. marjorie Whereas track 13 on folklore was a tribute to Swift’s paternal grandfather, evermore’s track 13 is a tribute to her maternal grandmother, Marjorie Finlay, who was an opera singer in the 50s, and passed away in 2003 when Taylor was 13 years old. “marjorie” is quite possibly the most touching track Taylor has ever written thus far in her career. Grief is one of the most difficult topics to tackle in a song; the genius of “marjorie” is that it is simple, yet not understated. Swift reflects on the profound lessons she learned from her grandmother, about the difficult balances of kindness and cleverness, and politeness and power. She curses herself for not cherishing the moments she had with her, for complaining rather than understanding in the moment how admirable her spirit was, for all the amber skies she’d love but will never see. The chorus, blunt and hard-hitting, reminds us that someone does not have to be living to be alive, to be all around, to be with us. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were singing to me now,” Taylor sings towards the end of the song, right before you hear a sample of Finlay’s opera singing in the background, a truly eye-swelling moment. It is clear that Finlay played a pivotal role in Swift’s own ambitions, as she sings, “all your closets of backlogged dreams, and how you left them all to me.” Marjorie knew she was leaving them in good hands. If you haven’t yet, check out the moving lyric video for the song, where you can see photos and video clips of Marjorie, both throughout her career and in her time with Taylor. Best lyric: “Never be so polite you forget your power, / never wield such power you forget to be polite.”

14. closure On the most experimental track musically on the record, Taylor writes off her need for closure from a relationship of some sort, whether it be romantic or platonic or business, all of which can cause hurt of equal intensity. The subject of the song is trying to make nice with Taylor, and she is just not having it, as it is not coming from a genuine place, but rather to ensure that their life remains picture perfect, or to clear their guilty conscience, or to preserve their own ego. This is a deeply relatable sentiment; as valuable as forgiveness can be, sometimes the person who hurt you just doesn’t deserve it, and all you can do is forgive yourself for blocking their number or shredding their letters. Best lyric: “I know I’m just a wrinkle in your new life / staying friends would iron it out so nice.”

15. evermore feat. Bon Iver To close out the standard edition of the album, Taylor joins forces once again with Justin Vernon of Bon Iver, with whom she collaborated on the Grammy-nominated duet, “exile” for folklore. However, Swift leads most of the track this time, lamenting the difficult time she went through in 2016. The piano and Swift’s vocals are haunting, particularly when she describes this time in her life as “catching my death,” consumed by a pain that she feels will never end. If you’ve ever been depressed, you know what that feels like, and the dark places it leads you. Although she is singing about a time four years prior, it sounds so present, and it is heartbreaking to hear her in such a state. When Bon Iver comes in, the tempo of the song picks up, the piano riff becomes more erratic, like a winter storm hitting you in the face, and he voices all the anxieties of the cost of such a downfall. But through those anxieties, Taylor finds not a cure, but an anchor in love, and then the tempo slows back down. By the end of the song, Taylor has the foresight to understand that although it may not feel like it now, the pain she is experiencing is not permanent (a sentiment my therapist has been trying to instill in me for years). In her Apple Music interview with Zane Lowe, Taylor explained how the lyrics parallel the times we are in currently, and so it feels really special to have the album end with someone who knows how it feels to be imprisoned by your pain gently comfort us with the wisdom that “this pain wouldn’t be for evermore.” I hope one day soon, as we leave 2020 far behind, we can all truly believe her. Best lyric: “I was catching my breath / barefoot in the wildest winter catching my death.”

16. right where you left me (bonus track) The first bonus track on evermore, “right where you left me,” captures a moment so earth-crushing, a piece of you is trapped in it forever. In this song specifically, the narrator finds herself stuck in the same corner of a restaurant where she was told by someone she loved that they had met someone else. “Glass shattered on the white cloth, everybody moved on,” she sings in mourning. We have all experienced those moments that we could teleport back to if we just closed our eyes; the scenery, what you wore, the smell and taste of the season, the very point in your body where it felt like your insides were collapsing. Or that one particular person, who is long-gone from your life but seeing them is like time-travelling back to that person you once were, ready to pick up where you left off. But as much as you want to stay in that moment forever, just in case it changes in your favor, the cold reality is that the world stops for no one. Best lyric: “If our love died young, I can’t bear witness / And it’s been so long, but if you ever think you got it wrong / I’m right where you left me.”

17. it’s time to go (bonus track) “right where you left me” was Taylor’s cry for help to get out of restaurant, and “it’s time to go” is the answer to the call, as she sings in the first line, “when the dinner gets cold, and the chatter gets old / you ask for the tab.” This song is about gathering the strength to leave situations and relationships behind that no longer serve you. She grieves the betrayal of someone she thought to be a twin from her dreams (almost definitely referring to former friend, Karlie Kloss), acknowledges that keeping a marriage together for the sake of the kids often actually has the opposite intended effect (possibly- but not certainly- something she and her brother experienced), and recounts attempting to bargain with someone consumed by greed, only able to leave with herself (absolutely referring to the end of her fifteen-year long business relationship with Scott Borchetta, her former record-label owner). But as painful as leaving all of those situations was, Taylor has gained the wisdom to understand that walking away sometimes takes as much strength as persevering. You can’t stay at the restaurant, or at the mercy of someone else forever; you have to forge your own path, even if it’s in the opposite direction of what you envisioned for so long. And even with all her past success behind her, as folklore and evermore have proved, there is so much more ahead of her. Best lyric: “That old familiar body ache, the snaps from the same little breaks in your soul / You know when it’s time to go.”

In a time where we are all trapped in our homes and in our heads, the folklore/evermore experience has been the sweetest escape. If anything, the creation of these wonderful sister records has taught me that our most powerful tool in times of distress is our own imagination. Even just the ability to close my eyes while listening to one of these tracks and feel the character’s story is a gift. The way I’ve always been able to pick up Harry Potter and escape to Hogwarts when I’ve felt alone and friendless, I can listen to folklore and evermore when I feel scared or hopeless and escape into this enchanted forest Taylor has built, where I can climb above the trees and see it all for what it is. I feel so lucky to watch Taylor’s imaginative world unravel around me. I can’t wait to see what she creates next.

DISCLAIMER – REVIEWER’S BIAS: I would literally die for this bitch.

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