#jere explain yourself

[mrgintsu]

🫶

#käärijä #kaarija #jere pöyhönen #my stuff #alavus #he had that handprint and messy make up again #jere explain yourself #what the fuck is this

[writersblockedx]

Sparks

Pairing - Jeremiah Fisher x Fem!Reader Summary - Jeremiah goes to you for everything, and when you give him a vital piece of love advice, it dawns on him that he is, in fact, in love with you. Warnings - None? Slight mention of underage drinking. Words - 2K

Masterlist

As was common, Jeremiah was at a loss for his several hookups. And, as was even more common, he went to you to debrief and to ask for advice. While he had hookups and situation-ships way more than you did (or anyone in Cousins for that matter), he struggled with how to manage them. At least he did until he started asking you for advice.

He threw himself onto your bed, forcing you to shut the book you had been deep inside. There, staring up at the ceiling, he let out a huff. "What, or should I say who, is it this time?" You raised your brow at him, watching as Jere's wide pupils stared up to the ceiling as if he were replaying some memory over and over.

"Luke." He let the name out in a sigh. "And, And!" He suddenly added as if he had almost forgotten in his daydreaming gaze, "Abi."

He finally sat up, staring at you with them puppy eyes you could never resist. "Two?" You questioned.

"Yes." He said, barely embarrassed by such fact; at this point, it was to be expected. "Reframe from any criticism please."

"I'm not gonna criticise you, Jere." You told him, a sweet smile gracing your lips. "If anything, I don't see what the problem is here."

He took a second before shrugging, "I just- I feel wrong, you know? Guilty." He explained. "Like I'm going behind their backs."

"Okay then, well you either need to tell them both the truth or pick one."

Jeremiah thought about the options for a moment and ran both scenarios through his head until making his decision. "I have to pick one." He said before looking at you, uncertain, "Right?"

"If that's what you want." You comforted him.

At that, he let himself fall once more. This time, right into your lap as he made a dramatic sigh as if this decision was a life-changing one. "What if I don't know what I want?" He questioned, gazing up at you, his sea-blue eyes catching you into his trap.

You let a sniffle of a laugh as you looked down at him, "Oh, trust me Jere, you've no idea what you want. But, that's okay too, sometimes you have to experiment with different people until you know what you want." You went on.

That seemed to spark another question for him, one of which wouldn't leave his head for the next few weeks: "How do I know? Like, how do I know that this is someone who I want a relationship with? A proper relationship, not just a hookup."

For that, you needed to think. As much as you gave Jereimah advice after advice, that was a question he had never asked. "I suppose it has to be someone you feel that spark with. But not just a sexual spark." As you were certain Jere sometimes mistook it for. "A spark that reaches to a deeper, emotional level. Where you feel safe but excited at the same time. A balance, I guess." That was what you assumed anyway. You hadn't had many successful relationships yourself.

But your words had seemed to prompt something for Jere. His eyes washed away, his mind sucking him into his thoughts. Until, after a long moment, he sat back up and with furrowed brows, asked, "How do you know all this? It's not as if you're happily married."

"No need to remind me." You giggled, slapping the side of his forearm.

Of which he chuckled at and defended himself, "I'm serious! You talk all this wise shit and can't even get yourself a date."

You could have scoffed, "I can get myself a date, thank you."

"Really? When was the last time you went on one?"

Then you did scoff, grasping the pillow from behind you and chucking it at Jeremiah's head, only erupting more laughter from the both of you. "You are so rude!"

Only once your mini pillow fight died down and Jeremiah returned home, did that question take over his whole mind. He strolled into the kitchen, pouring himself a glass of milk as he thought over it: how did he know? The only time he felt a spark that wasn't sexual- well, he couldn't quite remember. Everything you had described, the safety but excitement, the emotional connection (and the sexual), well the only person he could ever even suggest he had felt that for was you.

"What's up with you?" His brother's voice broke him from the glare he had been giving the countertop.

His eyes widened, "Huh?"

Conrad and Belly, who had been trailing behind him, both giggled. "You're just a bit...out of it, you know?"

"Thinking."

"That's a first." Conrad laughed.

Jeremiah snapped, "Hey!"

"Go on then," Belly pushed, "What is it you're thinking about?"

The boy sighed, replaying your words once more. "A spark."

"Why's a hookup causing you an existential crisis?" Questioned Conrad, watching his brother in such a focused state that it was becoming a concern.

"It's not a hookup." Jere admitted. "It's Y/n."

Suddenly, that name peaked Belly's interest. She leaned closing, placing her elbows on the kitchen island as she watched the boy carefully, "What about her?" She prompted.

"I went to her for advice, as I always do, and now I can't get it out of my head. She was explaining how for love, you need a spark, an emotional connection, safety..." He stopped there, ever so stunned by his recent realisation.

"And?" Belly pushed on, one brow raised.

Jeremiah sucked in a breath, not making eye contact with either of them as he said, "She basically just described everything I feel for her."

He looked at his brother and his best friend. It was silent. At least for a moment as he took in their unreadable expressions; were they stunned? Embarrassed? Futile? Then, breaking the silence came Conrad's laugh. "You have a crush on Y/n, great." He shook his head. "It took you long enough."

Jere's brows instantly furrowed as he straightened his back, "What? How did you-" He couldn't get his words out.

Conrad looked to Belly, "Come on, back me up. It was obvious."

Jeremiah looked to his friend and Belly could only shrug. "It sort of was." She agreed. "But, now you know, you can ask her out!" Excitement was painted on her words. Belly had been waiting for this for almost longer than yourself.

"I can't do that. She's- She's Y/n. She's my best friend. It'd be weird." The idea was so foreign that it was unbelievable.

"She's your best friend who you're in love with!" Belly argued. "Think about it, please."

With that, she and Conrad left Jeremiah to his thoughts. Once more, you never left his mind. He had been trapped.

For weeks, it was all he could think about. He'd gaze across the other side of the pool at you. Shades covering your eyes as you bathed in the sunlight. There he was daydreaming of everything you would do as a couple. Granted, it was pretty much the same as how things were now, only littered with kisses and hugs and greater smiles than either of you had ever made before.

It came to the point where he was just bursting to tell you. But he waited. He had to wait until the right moment. He couldn't do it by the pool, with Steven and Belly watching. He would wait for the perfect moment. And when the group of you arrived at a local party, he knew maybe tonight would be the night.

A few drinks down, he caught you by yourself. You had wandered to the backyard, sitting on the stairs that led to the porch. He lingered by the patio door, watching you as you sat alone for a moment. Your curious expression was emphasised by the fairy lights which tangled over the wooden fencing, flashing pinks and purples across your cheeks.

You didn't even know Jeremiah was there until he came and sat next to you, your shoulders nudged up against the others. "Enjoying the party?" A smooth smile hung from his lips as he grasped the red solo cup in his hand.

You nodded and glanced over at him, "Yeah, yeah, just needed a break." You excused.

Jere smiled, looking back through the patio doors and the booming party he could still overhear. "That's understandable." He gazed back at you and fell, once more, into your eyes.

"What about you?" You nudged his shoulder playfully. "You're never one to miss a moment from a party. Shouldn't you be looking for Luke? Or, or Abi!" You spat out their names as they flooded back into your memory. You had lost count of all the people Jere had hooked up with.

His smile faulted at the mention of their names, "Erm, no, no. I actually ended things with both of them." He admitted.

"Oh, why?" You raised a brow. "Ended up telling them the truth?"

"No, no." He answered before he looked to the ground, licked his lips and questioned if this was the moment. Something in his mind said fuck it, and he did. "But it was actually because of something you said." Jeremiah couldn't tear his eyes away from you as that curiosity built on your expression once again. "When you were explaining it to me, everything that love made you feel, all the sparks and the connections. That you should feel safe with them but it should be exciting all the same. Well," He took a breath and ran with it. "You're the only person that makes me feel that way."

The air soon became thick with Jeremiah's words as they floated around your mind. This was Jere, your friend, your best friend. The one who had talked non-stop about her and him all while you were nothing but a bystander. Yet, here you were, sitting away from the party the boy was usually the centre of as he professed his love. And you could never deny your feelings in that it wasn't reciprocated.

This time, it was your turn to look to the ground, lick your lips and say: Fuck it. "Jere, I can't deny that you aren't utterly brilliant. I mean, you're incredibly beautiful, and you know it. You're charming and comedic, you bring a room to life. And I love being at your side for all of that, I want to be there in the future too." You took a breath, wondering if your next words were about to ruin that smile that was glued to his lips. "But, it's because I want that, that I want to be your friend. Just your friend." Like that, the smile dissipated. "I can't be some other hookup that you start complaining about because they get too attached, or too clingy. I won't let that be me."

He jumped to take your hands in his. What used to be a simple gesture between the two of you, had suddenly become complicated and you questioned if you should let go. "That's not what you are to me. I would have already tried that on you if that was what I wanted, trust me." He admitted. "This isn't me asking you to kiss me, or to have sex with me or whatever I do nowadays. I'm sat here asking you to be my girlfriend."

The word had been said. It was in the air and it was up to you what you did with it.

And so, you tightened your grip on his fingers and said, "I want you Jere and I trust that you want me to." From there, you leaned in before he could respond, securing a yes with a kiss.

#jeremiah fisher #jeremiah fisher x reader #jeremiah fisher x you #jeremiah fisher x y/n #jeremiah fisher imagine #jeremiah fisher fanfic #jeremiah fisher oneshot #jeremiah fisher fic #jeremiah x reader #tsitp #tsitp 2 #tsitp x reader #the summer i turned pretty season 2 #the summer i turned pretty #conrad fisher #belly conklin #x reader #imagine #oneshot #fanfic

[darkeralmond]

TYSM FOR THE REQUEST BABES I FINALLY GOT IT!!

Hopper’s Cove

Jeremiah Fisher x fem! Reader

synopsis: nicole leaves you and your friends in hopper’s cove after conrad texts belly someone romantic. you call jeremiah to pick you up and help which leads to something more.

warnings: 18+, smut, p in v, praising kink, making out, nipple play

word count: 2k

a/n: TYSM FOR THE REQUEST!! i’m so excited for speak now tv… ONLY A COUPLE DAYS!!!

masterlist | request info

A pair of car headlights shined on Taylor, Belly, and you as it pulled out of Hopper’s Cove. “What the fuck?” you yelled as you watched the car drive away, leaving the three of you stranded while naked in the lake.

Taylor swam over to the dock and pulled herself up. “They took everything!” She looked back at you and Belly with a look of distress on her face.

“What?!” Belly and you yelled in sync before swimming toward Taylor. You pulled yourself up and saw all your clothes were gone.

“The only thing they left was your phone,” Taylor said to Belly. She read the text plastered on the screen from Conrad which really incriminated Belly. Belly couldn’t help but crack a smile while Taylor read the semi-romantic text. “Belly! Focus!” Taylor hit her, causing Belly to snap out of whatever trance she was stuck in.

You thought about a solution while your friends argued. You knew there was one person to call and that was your best friend. “We have to call Jeremiah… and Conrad,” you said Conrad’s name like it was an afterthought. “They need to bring us our stuff.” You got your wet hair out of your face by tucking it behind your ear.

“No, I don’t want to start any more drama with Conrad.” Belly shook her head and frowned.

Taylor scoffed, “That doesn’t matter, Belly. We need to get our stuff back so we don’t get hypothermia.”

Belly continued to argue with Taylor about it, but you had already grabbed your phone and dialed Jeremiah’s number. He answered quickly, “Hello?” There was loud house party music blaring in the background.

“Jeremiah?” you said, your voice a bit shaky. “Nicole and her friends just left us in Hopper’s Cove while we were skinny dipping and she took all our shit.”

“Like what?” Jeremiah replied, obviously confused and concerned by the story you just gave him. “Are you okay? Who’s with you?”

“She took our clothes! I’m with Taylor and Belly.” You looked over at the two girls who listened intently. “Please hurry with our stuff.”

“I’m on the way,” Jeremiah said before hanging up. You put the phone down and looked over at the girls.

“He’s heading over,” you said, nodding at the girls. Taylor had a look of relief on her face while Belly still looked worried.

Jeremiah and Conrad’s cars pulled up to the cove, their headlights spotlighting you. “Y/N!” Jeremiah yelled as he sprung out of his car and ran toward you guys. “Holy shit, are you okay? What happened?” He leaned down to your level.

You shook your head. “Too much to explain right now.” He frowned as he stared into your eyes, your glossy eyes. It made him feel sick.

“Nicole gave me these,” Conrad said as he placed the clothes on the deck.

Taylor squinted her eyes and glared at Conrad. “We wouldn’t have been in this mess if you had just left Belly alone.” He didn’t say anything after that, he just frowned and stepped away. “Can you two turn around?”

Taylor’s words pulled Jere away from the intense eye contact between you two. “Yeah, of course!” he said, immediately getting up from his spot and turned away with Conrad.

The three of you got out of the pool and threw on your clothes. The dry cloth stuck to your wet body as you put on your shorts and shirt. Once the other girls finished, you said, “Okay. We’re good.”

They turned back around, now acting really awkward. Jeremiah cleared his throat and approached you. “How’s the driving situation gonna go?” he asked.

“Uh,” Belly spoke up. “We could ride with Conrad.” She glanced over at Taylor when she said that. Taylor glared at Belly when she said that, obviously not wanting to go. Belly muttered something to her which caused Taylor to roll her eyes and agree.

You looked up at Jere and smiled softly, “I can ride with you… if that’s fine with you.”

He wrapped his arm around you and pulled you into a side hug. “Of course it’s fine.” He pulled away and looked up at Conrad, Taylor, and Belly. “We’ll meet you guys at the house.”

The group of three got in Conrad’s car and drove off while you and Jeremiah hopped into his car. He leaned back against the seat before looking over at you with a soft expression. “Now can you tell me what happened?” he asked.

You cleared your throat and let out a small hum. “Uh, yeah.” Your eyes trailed away from his. You couldn’t keep eye contact with him, it was nearly impossible.

Moments like these made you feel like you were incredibly vulnerable. Like any small move could really mess up this entire friendship between you two.

You cleared your throat, focusing on the lake in front of you. “Conrad texted Belly about how he really wanted to ask her to the deb ball and not only because Susannah told him to.” You looked back at him and frowned.

He let out a scoff and looked off to the lake as well. “Sounds like Connie,” he responded. He ran his fingers through his blonde curls and looked back at you. “So she took all your stuff because of that?”

You nodded your head and let out a small exhale, “It’s stupid. I didn’t expect her to be such a snake.” This won a laugh out of him which made a smile grow on your face. “Thank you for coming.” You looked down at your lap where you fiddled with your thumbs.

“Why wouldn’t I come?” he asked. “You’ll always have me.”

This sent a chill down your spine as you perked your head up. The way he said this sounded different than the other times he did. “What do you mean?” you asked. You didn’t know what made this feel different than the other times before.

His expression turned into a shocked one, you swore you could’ve seen his face dusted with blush. “Oh, well…” he started. “You know… I care about you a lot and… yeah!”

A smile played on your lips as you furrowed your eyebrows. “Jeremiah Fisher, are you blushing?”

He rolled his eyes and looked away. “Shut up!” he laughed. “Yes, I am.” He looked back at you and smiled softly. You met his gaze, listening to the loud pounding of your heart in your ear. “Y/N,” he said, “I really like you. Like… I love you.”

Your eyes widened as your mouth dropped open slightly. His confession caught you completely off guard. Jeremiah loved you? Was he serious? “Really?”

“Definitely,” he said as he reached for your hand, intertwining your fingers with his. A warm feeling crept through your veins and onto your cheeks. Now you were the one blushing.

“Jeremiah, I…” You closed your mouth and looked down at your hands as you rubbed circles onto his hand with your thumb. After taking a deep breath you turned back up to him with wide eyes and spoke very quietly. “Me too. I like you too.” Your cheeks flushed and you smiled a bright smile.

A smile spread on his face as he leaned over to place a kiss on your lips. You kissed him back, your eyes fluttering shut. His lips tasted so sweet and you were giddy at the sensation.

His hand left yours and made its way down to your upper thigh. You broke away from the kiss out of shock before glancing down at his hand back to his eyes.

In the heat of the moment, you couldn’t stop yourself from saying, “Jeremiah. I want you to be my first.” His blue eyes pulled that out of you, and you were a bit embarrassed.

His eyebrows raised as his eyes widened. “Your first…?” He blinked a couple times in disbelief. “You mean…?”

You nodded your head. “Yes.” You grabbed his hand off your thigh and gripped onto it tightly. “Please?” you begged. You batted your eyelashes playfully as you stared into his eyes. You waited for his answer as he processed everything.

Slowly but surely, his face turned a deeper shade of red. He seemed hesitant to say yes to you, but eventually he did. “Okay.”

You nodded your head. “Okay.” You placed another kiss on his lips, this one more heated and passionate. You unbuckle your seatbelt while your lips continue to stay locked with his. You pulled away and crawled over the seat as he leaned back in the driver seat.

You straddled his lap and looked down at him, your hands now rested on his upper chest. He glanced down at your shirt before pulling his shirt off. You followed him and revealed your white bralette.

He stared at your body in awe, his hands slowly coming up to grope your breasts. “You’re so beautiful, Y/N.” This caused your face to turn a deep shade of red as he snaked his hands around your back and unclasped the bra.

Your nipples hardened as his fingers grazed against your cool, damp skin. He placed kisses on your body before locking his lips around one of your nipples.

A quiet moan escaped from you as you tilted your head to the side. His hands trailed down to your lower back as he placed kisses on your boobs. “Jeremiah.” You mewled, grabbing his hair gently. He moaned into your skin when he heard you speak his name.

“You sound so sexy when you say my name,” he mumbled. You shook your head and giggled lightly as he sucked on your right nipple.

He gave quick licks against your bud which drove you mad, but it wasn’t enough for you. “Jere,” you whimpered. “Stop teasing!”

“But you sound so sexy when you say my name…” he whispered, kissing the tip of your right breast. You bit your bottom lip and clenched your fists in his blonde locks. “Hurry up, Jeremiah.”

He giggled at your whines, but gave into your requests. He pulled away and unbuckled his belt, sliding his pants and boxers down just enough for him to palm his dick in his hand. You slid down your shorts and panties, looking at him with anticipation. “Are you on anything?” he asked.

You nodded your head, “Plan B.”

“Okay,” he answered and looked down at his erection. “You ready?” he asked softly.

“God, yes. Yes, please,” you replied.

With a smirk on his face, he aligned himself with your entrance. He inserted himself inside you, causing a gasp to fall from your lips. You rocked your hips back and forth at a steady pace.

He groaned at your movement, his hands held onto your hips to guide you. “Fuck, Y/N. You feel so good. So perfect…”

Your eyes fluttered shut as you moved your hips faster against him. You held back a small moan as a tightness began forming in your core. As quickly as it came, the pain disappeared, leaving behind a warm feeling instead.

You opened your eyes and focused them on Jeremiah. He had his eyes closed with a satisfied look etched across his features. His breaths were heavy, he didn’t hesitate to pull his pants down, he must’ve been really turned on.

Your movements began slowing down. Your hips still moved rhythmically to give him an amazing time. He groaned at how close he felt you getting to your orgasm. He tightened his grip on your hips. “Just cum, Y/N. Come on.”

Your eyes rolled back as you released a high pitched moan. Your muscles tensed up as you squeezed your eyes shut tighter than before. You had never felt more pleasure in your life as you came.

You opened your eyes again once you felt the last drop fall. Your eyes went wide and you let out a soft gasp. “Holy fuck, Jeremiah…”

He smirked before placing his forehead against yours. “You did so good,” he grinned.

He brought both of his hands up to your face, cupping both of your cheeks. Before he pressed his lips against yours quickly.

When he pulled away, he asked, “You ready to go? Conrad and them are probably worried we died or something.”

“Yeah,” you giggled. You got off him and sat back down in the passenger seat. You checked your phone and saw that Belly and Taylor had been blowing up your phone.

#jeremiah fisher x y/n #jeremiah fisher x reader #jeremiah fisher smut #jeremiah fisher #team jeremiah

[eddiemunsons80sbaby]

Never Say Never

Chapter 11

Pairing: SingleDad!StevexReader

Summary: You are a 32 year old single mother, raising your seven year old son on your own. After being widowed at 30 and going out on awful dates with disgusting men for the past month, you have decided that you're giving up. You already had your great love. One person can't possibly get lucky enough to have two in their lifetime. But then your son starts playing baseball and the coach might just change your mind about that.

No posting schedule.

18+ only for eventual smut

Word Count: 9.4K

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Three hours later found you sitting in the passenger seat of Steve’s car, wondering if doing this together was a good idea. After you managed to get some actual baking done, your counter littered with trays of sweet treats, you'd realized what time it was. Steve announced that the two of you should go get the kids. Like this was a normal occurrence, the two of you picking up your children from school together. Like you wouldn’t be making some epic statement to the world when you exited the same car at Hawkins Elementary. 

What would Eli think when he came out of school to find both you and Steve waiting for him? How would he feel riding home from school in Steve’s car? Who were you kidding? Your son would be ecstatic. He’d get to spend more time with Jeremiah, which was always a good thing in his book. And wasn’t this exactly what the boys had been pushing for? The two of you together?

Were you together? It should be obvious after what had gone down in your kitchen. But was it? It was fairly obvious to you that Steve had been around the block a few times. From the way he and his friends talked he was no stranger to relationships. Did sex mean anything more to him than just a good time? Did you want it to mean more? As much as you liked him, what in the hell had you just gotten yourself into? It felt like you'd just bypassed far too many steps and were stumbling into what could be dangerous territory. Shouldn’t there have been some conversation about what you were to each other, declarations of love or something before you got all carnal with each other?

You had no idea. You were really bad at this. You and Justin hadn’t slept together until the night he’d told you he loved you and you'd said it back. There had only been three guys prior to him and only one of them had been a one night stand, a drunken mistake your freshman year of college. Was that what this had been? A one night stand? Or, actually, a one morning stand since it hadn’t even been noon when it began? Or was Steve thinking you were now officially a couple? Jesus, you needed to talk about it but this would be a really bad time now. You couldn’t have this discussion with the kids around.

Why hadn’t you said anything in the kitchen? It wasn’t like the two of you had been silent. You'd talked as you baked but it was all meaningless stuff. Steve filled you in on the new project his company was working on. You told him about the helicopter mom that had been in the office yesterday, standing over your shoulder as you'd administered vaccinations. He’d been touchy, kissing the back of your neck as he transferred baked goods to the oven for you or placing his hands on your hips, watching over your shoulder as you tried to show him how to properly measure ingredients. The guy had no idea what he was doing. He was used to seasoning to his heart’s content. You had to explain that baking was like chemistry. It had to be exact. But not once had either of you addressed what had just happened or what it meant. 

“Anyway, you don’t have to if you don’t want to but I know Jere would love it. And I would love it too but I don’t want to put too much pressure on you. I know this thing has just started, really.”

This thing? What thing? The two of you? Was it a thing? Were you the thing? Had it started? And what did that mean? Was he your boyfriend now? And what had he even been saying? Were you having the exact conversation you were thinking about and you were missing it? Your inner monologue had just interrupted him and now you had no idea what Steve was asking you. 

“I am so sorry. I kind of missed all of that. I was stuck in my head. What were you asking me?”

“We’re having Jere’s birthday party next weekend. It’s at my ex’s place. It will basically be all the people you met at my house plus my ex, her husband, and her parents. Anyway, Jere really wanted Eli to come so I promised I would ask. Nance and Jonathan hired some guy that dresses up like Batman so he knows he’s coming and he said Eli would be so mad at him if he didn’t get to meet Batman too.”

“Your ex’s house?” you asked, that one detail the only thing you could focus on out of everything he’d just said.

You'd gone on one date, somehow bypassed the appropriate amount of time before sleeping together considering he’d just ravished you on your damn kitchen counter, and now he wanted you to meet his ex-wife? To be introduced as his…what? His son’s friend’s mom? His friend? His girlfriend? What was happening right now?

Your fingers wrapped around the handle of the car door, squeezing tightly. Inhale. Exhale. You were not about to have an anxiety attack in his car. You were not going to do this right now. You had control of yourself and your body. This was insane. Why couldn’t you just respond to stress like most people? Why did the slightest things always set you off? You hated it. You hated that you couldn’t just handle the normal ups and downs of life anymore.

“Yeah. Look, I know it sounds weird but I promise you it won’t be. Nance is great and she’s dying to meet you.”

“Dying to meet me?”

“Yeah. I mean, Jere told her about you so she asked and then I told her about us going out.”

That explained it. The ex wanted to size up the new woman who was in his life, the new woman who was in her son’s life. You couldn’t blame her for that. If you were in her shoes, you would probably feel the same way. You'd want to know who was hanging around your son. Maybe she thought this was all too fast. Maybe she was pissed because he hadn’t talked to her about it first. Maybe you should have met her beforehand?

But how could you have? This all began because you were trying to set up a playdate for your son, not one for yourself. You'd had no intentions of dating Steve, not at first. It just kind of happened. There was no way to go about this the proper way when it hadn’t been planned. But was she going to hate you? To see you as some woman who was sneaking in behind her back and trying to take her place? 

“Look, you don’t have to come if it makes you uncomfortable. I knew it would be a hard ask. But if you don’t mind, I can always pick up Eli and take him myself. Jere would be shattered if his best friend wasn’t there.”

“No. Uh…I’ll go,” you stammered, swallowing down the tension that was filling your throat, choking you slowly. Why were you agreeing to this? Because you just couldn’t say no to that face, those hazel eyes, golden in the afternoon light that were looking at you with so much hope.

“You sure?”

“Yeah.” You turned your head toward him, offering up the best smile you could muster. You might live to regret it but it would make your son happy and Steve really seemed to want you there.  “Eli will be so excited.”

“Great. It’s at three. I would offer to pick you up but I told her I would help with setting up. You know, him being my kid too and all. I’ll give you her address.”

“Great.”

Steve pulled into the school parking lot, sliding into a space. You stepped out and walked to the front of the car, waiting for him to join you. You were pleasantly surprised when he took your hand in his as if it was just something you did, the two of you making your way up to school. He wanted you to come to his son’s birthday party and he was showing a display of affection in front of everyone at school. Maybe this was more than just hooking up. Maybe the two of you were a thing now. Your stomach both fluttered with joy and rolled with nerves at the thought.

You could feel the eyes following you and could practically hear the whispers that would be flying around like wildfire at the sight of the two of you. Not only showing up at parent pick-up together but holding hands. Whatever. It didn’t matter really. The rumor mill had already started churning from the moment you had left the baseball game together so let them talk. At least now what they were saying was actually true. 

The doors swung open, kindergarten releasing first followed by first grade. Little feet racing across the concrete into waiting arms, squeals of joy that the school day was over and they were going home to bike rides and basketball hoops in backyards. You caught sight of your son, right next to Jeremiah, where he always was, the two boys talking and laughing. His eyes fell on you, moved over to Steve, and then went directly down to where your hands were clasped. Him and Jeremiah shared a wide-eyed look and then they both yelled out loud, fists pumping in the air. 

“I think they’re happy. What do you think?” questioned Steve with a grin.

You laughed, “I would definitely say they’re happy.”

The boys ran over to you, both yelling, talking so fast it was difficult to catch what they were saying. They kept it up the whole walk back to the car, barely waiting for the car to start before questioning their parents.

“So are you guys like boyfriend and girlfriend now?” asked Jeremiah, leaning between you. 

“Put your seatbelt on,” Steve stated.

“But are you?” he asked again, sitting back and buckling in. 

“Yeah. Are we all going to live together now?” piped in Eli.

“Oh, that would be so cool! Are you getting married?”

“Do I call you daddy?”

It was happening again. You sunk down into your seat, eyes focusing on the numbers on the clock, the pine tree shaped air freshener hanging from the mirror, the sunglasses clipped on the visor above Steve’s head. You closed your eyes. Sounds…you couldn’t focus on sounds, nothing could be heard over the myriad of questions the boys were spewing out in the back. 

Then a warm pressure landed on your knee. Fingers pressing into the jean material, centering you, keeping you still while inside you felt like you were losing control. You inhaled through your nose, exhaled through your mouth, focusing on Steve’s fingers, the warmth and pressure, the comfort it provided. 

“You good?” he asked when you slowly opened your eyes and you nodded. You were. Somehow you were. “Alright. Let’s calm down a bit, okay? Eli's mom and I are just getting to know each other. We like each other and we would like to spend more time together and keep doing that. But no one is moving in anytime soon and no one is getting married anytime soon. Okay?”

His eyes darted to the rearview mirror and both boys nodded. He squeezed your knee again reassuringly. 

“But we might be spending even more time together than we have been. Would that be okay?”

“Yeah!” both kids yelled enthusiastically. 

“Alright. How about we start with tonight? I need to help your mom box up all the goodies we baked today for the school carnival on Saturday. How about after we’re done with that we go to the diner to grab some burgers and then we can come back and play some games, all four of us? Sound good?”

“Can I get a milkshake too?” asked Jeremiah.

“Oh yeah. What’s your favorite flavor?”

“Let’s both say it on three!”

“Okay,” Eli agreed as both boys turned to each other, counting before exclaiming at the same time, “Strawberry!”

Steve chuckled, turning those beautiful eyes on you, “That okay with you?”

“Yeah,” you replied, pressing your lips together. “That would be nice.”

“Good because I’m not ready to stop looking at this face yet.” He winked and your heart stuttered. 

___________________________________________________________

“Rita, can you schedule Tyler for a follow-up in two weeks?” you inquired as you walked Tyler and his mom to the front, turning to the mother. “Dr. Wilson just wants to make sure it’s a respiratory infection and not asthma. He’ll listen to his lungs again to make sure they’re clear after using the breathing treatments and corticosteroids. As long as everything sounds clear, then he should be all set.”

“Thank you so much.”

“Of course.” Leaning forward, you ruffled the six year old’s hair. “We’ll have you back out on the soccer field in no time. Just make sure you take it easy for a couple weeks, okay?”

“Okay,” he grumbled. 

You smirked, amused, because you knew if it were Eli he’d be the same way. There was nothing worse than trying to keep a little kid from being active. Your son would be devastated if he found out he couldn’t play baseball or run around at recess or don his cape and race around the backyard for a couple weeks. 

Kids. They just didn’t understand. You would give anything for someone to order you to take it easy for a couple weeks. You'd catch up on the books that were piled in your bedroom, the ones you couldn’t seem to stop buying but never seemed to get to. You'd watch all the movies that you hadn’t had time to go see in the theater. You'd take long bubble baths and afternoon naps. 

But barring some crazy illness, that was not in the cards for you. And you couldn’t afford a crazy illness, certainly not one that would knock you down for a couple weeks. Not with the school carnival tomorrow, Eli’s game on Sunday, and the impending promise of your parents showing up for a visit. 

Your eyes wandered over the appointment list, seeing that you didn’t have another patient for an hour but your mind was anywhere but. Your mind had been anywhere but where it should have been all day. You should have been focusing on test results, examinations, immunizations, medical histories, and charting. Instead it somehow kept finding its way back to your kitchen yesterday afternoon. 

What in the hell had you been thinking? That was precisely the problem. You hadn’t been thinking. Your brain had completely shut off and your body had taken over. You were like some teenage girl completely controlled by your hormones and your urges. He’d just looked so damn good and then he was kissing you and he was all you could think about, the only thing you could feel. And you'd wanted more. 

Right now, standing here, in the middle of the office, you wanted more. You wanted to get in your car, drive to his home, and have a repeat performance. It might have been a mistake but damn if it wasn’t one that would be worth repeating, if for no other reason than you were damn near positive that you would never feel like that again with anyone else. What was even more terrifying was that you didn’t want to. He was all you could think about and feeling this intensely this quickly was unsettling because it would make losing him all that much harder if it happened.

Was it Steve? Was he just that amazing at sex? His fingers and tongue had done things to you that made you forget your own name. He was definitely skilled. But was it as simple as that? Was it the combination of the two of you? It sure as hell felt so. It felt like you just fit, like his body had been carved to mold perfectly against yours, all your curves and edges lining up. 

“Hey girl!”

You shrieked, jumping about a foot in the air, your arm lashing out and knocking a cup of pens off the counter and onto the floor. Grumbling, you bent down to grab them, glancing up to find Janice grinning at you, eyes wide. 

“Sorry. What’s got you so jumpy?”

“Nothing. I…it’s nothing,” you muttered, setting the cup down, plopping the pens back inside. “What are you doing here?”

“I brought lunch,” your friend stated, holding up a brown paper bag and a cup holder with two coffees. “June made us two of her phenomenal turkey and pesto sandwiches on sourdough.”

“Okay…” you said, the word dragging out suspiciously. “And why exactly did you bring me lunch?”

“Does a bestie have to have a reason to do something nice for her favorite person on the planet? Also, do I have to have a reason to want to have lunch with you?”

“I guess not.”

“So, are you free?”

“Yeah, actually. I just looked and my next patient isn’t scheduled for another hour.”

“Did you want to head to your little spot by the pond?”

“Sure.”

You followed Janice, who bounced on the balls of her feet, only furthering your suspicions that this wasn’t just her wanting to have lunch with her best friend. The girl definitely had an agenda and whatever it was, she was pretty anxious about it if the bounce in her step was any indication. She bopped over to the bench, you joining her, as she pulled out two sandwiches wrapped in brown paper, offering one to you. 

“Thank you,” you said, taking a long drink of your iced coffee. “I needed this pick-me-up today. My morning caffeine hit is quickly wearing off.” Unwrapping your sandwich, you took a bite. “God, this is so good. I didn’t even realize how hungry I was until now.” You both ate in silence for a couple minutes, the only sound little groans of pleasure. June’s talent did not stop at a good cup of coffee. She knew how to make one perfect sandwich as well. “So what? Just needed a little break in your day?”

“Not exactly…” Janice began, pressing her lips together. She looked up at you, her lips pressed together in a nervous smile. “I’m pregnant.”

“What!?” Your arms flew out, the last few bits of the bread scattering off of your lap. Oh well. The ducks would definitely enjoy it. “Are you serious? When? How long have you known?”

“About two hours,” she said, mouth tight. “I just took the test this morning after Matt left for work.”

“What? Does he know?”

“No. You’re the first person I’ve told.”

“Janice…oh my god! I’m so…I’m so happy for you!” You pulled your friend into a hug, joy feeling like a balloon, filling you up until you could absolutely burst with it. “But, you told me first? I mean, you are planning on telling him, right?”

“Yes. I am. But I was just so nervous. I’ve been feeling a little nauseous and at first I just thought I’d caught a bug. But then I realized my period was a week late and it’s so early. I know it is. I probably shouldn’t have even told you because the chances of something going wrong are so drastically high right now…”

“Nothing is going to go wrong,” you assured her. 

“You can’t promise that.”

“No. I guess I can’t and maybe you wait until the second trimester to announce it to the world but you can’t wait that long to tell your husband. Matt is going to be so excited. The two of you have been trying for months. He’s going to be a dad, Janice.”

“I know! Trust me, I know. It’s just…he wants this so much and what if I tell him and we’re all excited and we’re picking out names and then something happens? I’m thirty-two and Holly is the same age as me and she had a miscarriage. I don’t want…”

You winced, remembering that emotional phone call you'd received just six months ago. Holly, your mutual friend from college, lived in California now, having moved there when her husband got a job transfer, but she still stayed in touch. Weekly phone calls, cards for special occasions, and she’d even flown in last summer to spend a week with you. A glorious week where you had taken vacation time and you'd all lounged at the lake, eaten far too much junk food, and stayed up half the night laughing and talking as you shared a bottle of wine. It had made you feel like you were twenty again, just starting life, optimistic about what was to come, not a care in the world. 

“Okay, yeah. That’s always a possibility but you can’t assume that. It had nothing to do with her age. Don’t you remember Stacy? We were only twenty-one and she had a miscarriage and that girl was the epitome of physical fitness. She ran track and watched everything she put in her mouth. She couldn’t have been healthier. Sometimes there’s no rhyme nor reason to it and it’s not fair but it doesn’t mean it’s going to happen. Let yourself be happy. This is a happy occasion. If you don’t want to share it with everyone for a while, then fine, but you have to share this with Matt. The two of you deserve to be in your own little bubble of bliss.”

“I know. I know you’re right. I just…I don’t know. I saw those two pink lines on that stick and at first, I was so excited. I screamed and I jumped up and down. I almost hopped in my car and drove straight to his work to tell him. But then all these doubts started creeping in and I just couldn’t. I freaked out and so I did what I always do when I freak out.” She paused, smiling, her shoulder lifting in a slight shrug as her hand covered yours. “I ran to you.”

“Well, while it is a tough job to always be the one to try to lead you back to the shallows when you jump off the deep end, it’s not a job I would ever trust to anyone else,” you told her, wrapping your fingers around your friend’s hand, squeezing gently. “And oh my God, Janice! You’re having a baby!”

“I’m having a baby!” she cried and the two of you collapsed into a hug, weeping and laughing and shrieking. “You’re going to be an aunt!”

“Eli is going to freak when he finds out.”

Janice raked her teeth over her bottom lip, “Can we not tell him just yet?”

“Of course,” you assured her. “Of course. We can absolutely wait until you’re ready. Besides, you and Matt definitely have to be the ones to tell him this news. He’s always wanted a younger sibling and I don’t see that happening so maybe he’ll settle for this.”

Janice shifted, one eyebrow raising, “I don’t know. There’s still a possibility.”

“Oh please,” you snorted with a dry laugh. “I’m widowed and in my thirties. Justin and I…I mean we talked about trying for another baby but then he was gone. I would have loved to give Eli a sibling but I really don’t think that’s in the cards.”

“Never say never,” your friend sang. “You have a new guy in your life. You’re not ancient. You’re sitting there telling me my age is fine for being pregnant so why couldn’t you do it?”

“Janice, Steve and I barely know each other. We’ve gone on one date.”

“Well, you know my argument on this. The two of you have spent far more time together than that. Besides, I think we can safely count it as two now. He was at your house yesterday baking.”

“That was baking. We were just getting stuff ready for the school carnival.”

Your face flushed with heat, your gaze dropping to your lap, thumbs twirling tightly around one another. It was far more than just baking but did it count as a date? Probably not. A mistake? Absolutely. Steve had been with quite a few women if rumors were to be believed and now you'd just lumped yourself in with the rest of them. So much for making him wait or keeping him interested. He already knew everything you had to offer. 

“Still, you were alone and…why’s your face all red?”

“What? My face is not red,” you protested, sucking down a massive gulp of iced coffee, willing the cool drink to also cool your flesh and stop giving you away. 

“You are too! You’re redder than a boiled lobster.”

“We’re not talking about me. We’re talking about you. You’re pregnant! We’re very excited about that.”

“Like hell we’re not talking about you. Don’t you try to change the subject. I mentioned baking and you got all flustered. The two of you, alone in your house, no kids around…you had sex, didn’t you!?”

“What!? I…no…I…”

“Girl, don’t bullshit me,” Janice warned, one perfectly manicured finger just an inch from your nose. “We’ve been friends for fourteen years. I know you better than anybody. You had sex, didn’t you?”

You groaned, your body sagging against the bench, “Yes.”

“Holy shit! Holy shit! I knew it! Oh my god, this is amazing. How was it? Where was it? Who initiated it? Does he look just as good underneath those clothes? Is he hung? Details! I need all the details!”

“Jesus Christ, do we really have to do this?”

“Yes we have to do this. My friend got well and truly fucked for the first time in over two years. I need to know everything.”

“But you don’t. It was…”

“Oh god. What’s wrong with him?” Janice cringed. “Is he a minute man? Was he one of those guys who thinks penetration is enough to get you there? Does he have a micro penis? Oh Jesus. He has a micro penis, doesn’t he? Guys like that, they always look like they’ll be hung but then they’re not. But it’s okay. We can work with it.” 

“No! God. It…it just shouldn’t have even happened. It was a huge mistake. I don’t know what I was thinking. That was the problem! I wasn’t thinking. I just…god, I wanted him so badly. I haven’t had sex in forever and I lost all control and then it was happening and there was no stopping it once it started and now he’s going to think I’m easy and he’s not even going to be interested. And now there’s all these feelings that wouldn’t have been there if I would have just kept my damn legs shut and if it doesn’t work out it’s going to be even more devastating. I’m terrified of what another heartbreak will do to me when I’m already hanging on by a thread most days. And it was so good and it shouldn’t have been that good. I shouldn’t be craving him the way I am right now. I can’t stop thinking about him and then that makes me feel awful because it feels like I am just completely abandoning Justin. I’m just moving on as if he didn’t matter. I shouldn't even be able to feel like this about someone else.”

“Whoa!” Janice held both hands up in front of her body. “Alright. Take a deep breath for me.” She inhaled slowly, gesturing for you to join her. After you did, Janice smiled. “Okay. That’s a lot of shit to unpack. So, let’s take it a step at a time, okay? So what if you already slept with him? Are you stuck on some archaic three date rule or something? You guys don’t fall into that category because you’ve been spending time together for a few weeks already. So, forget that. Steve is not going to think you’re easy. Honey, you’ve been the Virgin Mary since Justin passed away. It was inevitable that your self-control was going to snap. And around a man that looks like that, who could blame you? As for the feelings, feelings aren’t a bad thing and you can kid yourself all you want but sex isn’t changing the fact that you were already in deep for that man.” She pointed to herself. “Person who knows you best, remember? I know every expression that crosses your face, every little gesture you make, every emotion that you wear painted right across your sleeve. You’ve been in deep for that man from the moment you saw him on the baseball field. I could see it the first time you talked about him. So, that ship has long since sailed. If this all ends, you’re going to be just as devastated whether you opened your legs or not so you may as well have fun with it. I will throw your own words right back at you. You can’t control the future so be happy. You deserve it and as far as Justin, stop it. Stop obsessing about what he would think. He’s not here, honey. You’re not cheating on him. You’re not forgetting him. If you were, you wouldn’t be obsessing about how he would feel. He would be pissed, absolutely, if he were alive but he’s not. You wouldn’t be doing this if he were alive so that’s inconsequential. And the only thing he ever wanted, the only thing that ever mattered to him, was that you and Eli were happy and taken care of. Justin would love Steve because from what you’ve told me, he’s amazing to both of you. So, stop it. Okay? Get out of your head and enjoy this. Something amazing is happening here. Be in your own little bliss bubble.”

“I really like him,” you admitted.

“Well, duh,” laughed Janice. 

“It terrifies me. He’s amazing. I mean, he shouldn’t be real. He’s gorgeous. He’s kind. He’s attentive. He listens. I mean, he really listens to everything I say. He’s respectful, always making sure I am okay with what’s happening before it happens. He makes me laugh. He is a wonderful father and just a wonderful human. He’s so self-sacrificing, always putting everyone else before himself. I think…I think I might be falling for him and that’s insane. We barely know each other. Isn’t that insane?”

Janice shrugged, “Is it? I mean, there’s no timeline for this kind of stuff. There’s no manual on how to feel about something. We can’t control it. I knew I loved Matt on our fourth date. I don’t know. I just knew he was it for me. I didn’t say it then, of course. I was scared he would think I was crazy and I would chase him away. But he said it after we’d been together for six weeks and so I said it too. And look at us. Look at you and Justin. How long did it take you to say the L word?”

“Two months. He took me ice skating. I fell and took him with me and he just grabbed my face and told me he loved me. And I don’t know. I just knew I felt the same way. I think I actually knew it for longer than that but I didn’t say it.”

“So, do you love Steve?”

“I don’t know,” you groaned. “That’s a really big word for something that’s barely begun.”

“Babe, you’ve been about as intimate as two people can be. And you all hang out like you’re a little family already. I don’t think it’s as big of a word as you think. Or, it is a big word, but I don’t think it’s too big to describe what’s happening.”

“Maybe…I…I just don’t know. I know I really like him. I know that I can’t stop thinking about him. I know that I am counting down the hours until he picks us up tomorrow for the carnival because I just want to see his face.”

“Sure sounds like it to me,” Janice grinned. “Look, it’s not a big deal. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. No one’s saying you have to say anything or define anything right now. Just stop obsessing and let yourself enjoy this because it’s pretty damn cool. You, my friend, are in the midst of a love story, a sequel if you will to your first one. Just enjoy the ride.”

“I’ll try,” you assured her, dropping your head on her shoulder. “Now, how soon am I allowed to start shopping for my niece or nephew?”

“Oh lord,” she chucked. “You’re going to spoil this kid rotten, aren’t you? I guess I deserve that for all the shit I’ve bought for Eli over the years.”

“Absolutely.”

___________________________________________________________

“Four hot dogs with everything and a popcorn please,” the jovial dad announced as he stepped forward in line. 

“You got it. Would you like anything to drink?”

He glanced over at his wife, the two conversing over their drink options. Their kids, a boy in third grade and a girl in fourth, chimed in, making sure their preferences were known. It quickly turned into the kids whining and huffing when their parents settled on waters, denying their request for a Coke and an icee. 

The icee machine was something that Laurie was very proud of procuring for the school carnival. Apparently, she convinced Sal, who ran the gas station in the middle of town to allow them to borrow his for the evening. You were pretty sure Sal was just the next in a long line of men that Laurie strung along, flirting shamelessly to get what she wanted from them. Poor guys. They didn’t realize they would be receiving nothing in return until they were in too deep. 

Steve loaded up the hot dogs, handing them off to you so you could hand them to the family. You reached into the cooler to grab their bottles of water while he scooped out popcorn, loading it into the red and white striped boxes that were customary at every concession stand. 

You smiled as you watched your son and his friends race past, their faces covered in paint. Tina had kindly offered to keep an eye on them while Steve and you fulfilled your hour at the concession stand. You took the money the dad offered, telling them to have fun, watching as Eli stepped forward to try his luck at the duck pond. His little face lit up when he turned his duck over to reveal a number. The guy offered him a tiny rubber finger alligator and he couldn’t have been more pleased, immediately placing it on his finger and roaring as he shoved it in Jeremiah’s face. The boys thought this was hysterical, all of them breaking into a fit of laughter. 

“They’re sure enjoying themselves.”

You jumped at Steve’s words spoken right in your ear. You tilted your head to find him, one arm propped on the counter, his lips just a breath from yours. The smile he gave you was as soft and familiar as a pillow, the one you even had to take on vacation because it was molded to your shape. 

“Hi,” he whispered. 

“Hi.” You laughed, the sound hoarse and breathy as you tried to get your bearings. His presence invading your space sent you entirely off kilter like a planet knocked from its orbit, floating haphazardly in the vast nothingness of space. 

“We’ve been working back here for thirty minutes together and have barely talked.” His fingers walked across the counter to cover your hand with his own. “You’ve been kind of quiet.”

“No. No, I haven’t. We’ve just been busy.”

His head tilted, lips pouting in that way that just made you want to kiss them right off his face. One eyebrow lifted, those hazel eyes reaching straight through you and into your soul, as if he could read you like the pages of a book. The thought, while comforting, was also a bit unsettling. You weren't sure how to feel about him being able to see you so clearly after such a short time. 

Had you been quiet? Probably. Your brain was a bit occupied with everything that had occurred in the last forty-eight hours of your life. You'd not only gone on a date with Steve but crossed the line into sex. What did it mean? Were you a couple now? Were you still just getting to know each other like he’d told the boys? Did he still look at you the same way even though you'd been so willing to be intimate with him so quickly? 

You were spinning out a bit. Your talk with Janice had helped some but you hadn’t done this in years. You had no idea how to deal with the bevy of emotions that were twisting you into a knot. You couldn’t stop thinking about him. A simple touch and you were like a sixteen year old girl, hormones raging, on the verge of losing control, ready to grab him and smash your lips to his in front of all these damn people. 

“Is that it?” he mused, forehead tilting down, almost close enough for yours to touch. “I know we haven’t really talked about what happened on Thursday but I’d like to. I wanted to…”

“Help has arrived!” came a high pitched sing-song voice and you moved your head around Steve to see the source. It was Janet Comstock, one of your least favorite people on the planet. And judging from the look on Steve’s face, she didn’t rank very high for him either. “Looks like you two have been pretty busy.”

“Janet? I thought your shift didn’t start for another thirty minutes. You and Ryan are supposed to do the next one together,” Steve stated, straightening and turning. He leaned back against the counter, arms crossed, staring her down like she was a misbehaving child. 

“Oh, it doesn’t but I figured you two could use the help when I saw how people just kept lining up.”

“I think we’re alright,” protested Steve. 

“Nonsense. It never hurts to have more hands, right?” she beamed and then snorted, rolling her eyes. “You know, if you fill up the popcorn boxes in advance then you don’t have to waste time when people order them. Much more efficient. See? You need me.”

“Like a hole in the head,” he muttered, teeth clenched tightly, only you hearing his words. 

“Oh, hi there." She smiled at you as if she'd just noticed you standing there. "I didn't realize you were volunteering." Bullshit. She'd been at the meeting. "How have you been?” Janet breezed, donning a pair of latex gloves in preparation to scoop up popcorn. 

“Okay…” you replied slowly, growing more confused by the minute. You weren't a fan of Janet either but Steve seemed to be extremely put off by her presence. 

“That’s good. I’m so glad to see you doing better,” she continued as she scooped. “We were all so worried about you for a while. No one ever saw you. I swear, you became a hermit after everything. Not that I blame you. Justin was perfect, wasn’t he? You had every woman in town jealous. If only we all could find our soulmate but alas, we’re not so lucky. I mean, when there’s only one person who’s really meant to be yours, what are the chances of you finding them in this great big world?”

“I…I mean, yeah, I was lucky to have Justin. He was an amazing man,” you said awkwardly, unsure of what was happening. 

Steve was like a statue next to you, standing rigid, his jaw so hard you were sure it could cut through six inch glass. This was the most uncomfortable situation you'd ever been in. You would never pretend like Justin wasn’t one of the best things to happen to you but you really didn’t want to talk about that in front of Steve. But Janet couldn’t know that, right? People may have made assumptions about the two of you but they didn’t actually know what had happened. 

“Oh, he was,” crooned Janet. “Strong, kind, and so romantic. I remember when he had all those roses delivered to the doctor’s office for you. I had taken Sally in for an ear infection and they were everywhere, completely covering the counter. Poor Rita could barely see.” She laughed. “The way you two would look at each other, it was like something out of one of them cheesy romance movies. The kind you think are completely fake because nothing like that could ever actually exist. But you two showed us all it could. You must miss him terribly. It must be awful knowing you can never find anything that could come close to that again. But at least you had it for a while, right? Some of us never do.”

“Yeah. I…I…did…” you stammered, your fingers wrapping around the counter so tightly they were tingling, on the verge of going numb. What was this? Why was Janet saying all of this? 

You were struck with the need to get out of there, to be anywhere else but here, talking about your perfect love that you no longer had in front of the guy you were hoping to find it with again. To find something with again. The muscle in Steve’s jaw jumped, his nostrils flaring. He was angry. 

Was he angry because you were talking about Justin? He knew. He knew you'd been married, knew you'd lost your husband, knew you had loved him very much. Was he not capable of handling this? Of knowing that you'd had a great love before? Justin was never going to be erased from your life. Eli was proof of that. You would forever have a piece of him and if Steve couldn’t handle that then this whole thing might be over before it had even begun. 

Janet turned with a sad smile, sighing deeply, her plastic covered hands coming to her chest, “I thought I had that.” Her eyes moved over to Steve and it felt like a ten pound stone had just dropped in your stomach. “I really did but some people are just too scared to let true love in, to see what’s right in front of their face. They keep running to the wrong thing instead of embracing the right one.”

Oh god. Janet. It all came rushing back. That day on Steve’s deck, the girls all talking about this woman he’d dated. Janet, the one he almost had to get a restraining order against. The one who had become obsessed with him. And now it all made sense. Now you could see why Janet was going on and on about Justin. She was trying to make Steve see that you were all wrong for him. Was he thinking that too?

You lifted your fingers from the underside of the counter, curling them one by one, focusing on the feel of the smooth stainless steel. Your eyes zeroed in on the popcorn boxes, the familiar red and white stripes. You needed to get out of here before it happened again. It could not happen here, not in front of Janet, not in front of half the town. You would never live it down. The news of you breaking down at the school carnival would be everywhere before everyone’s heads hit the pillow tonight.

“You know, since you showed up early, how about you help Steve for a bit? I’m going to go check on the boys,” you said, pushing off from the counter, inhaling slowly through your nose. 

“Wait. What?” Steve had been zapped from wherever his mind had just been taking him. “No. I…we only have twenty minutes left…I…”

“No, really. It’s silly for all three of us to be back here when it really only takes two. I’ll go relieve Tracy.”

You walked off before he had a chance to respond, not trusting yourself to spend one more minute in the midst of that tension and animosity. You could not hear Justin’s name come out of that woman’s mouth one more time. You could not watch Steve grow angrier each time he came up. You marched out, on the hunt for your son, ready to lose yourself in the chaos of the carnival instead of the chaos of whatever the hell that was. 

___________________________________________________________

“Janet, what the hell was that?” Steve snapped as the heavy door closed behind you. You'd darted out of there as fast as possible, not that he blamed you. He hadn’t wanted to be there either but one of you had to stay behind. 

“That was me trying to save you from making a huge mistake,” she stated, arms folding over her chest, brown eyes burning into his. “Are you really that naive that you can’t see it?”

“See what exactly?”

“That girl is all wrong for you! You’ll never be able to measure up to her husband, ever!”

“I’m not trying to!” he yelled, jolting when he noticed Sarah standing at the counter, looking sheepish at interrupting what was obviously a heated argument. 

“Hey there,” she said brightly, waving. “So sorry to interrupt. I just wanted to get some popcorn and a couple of icees.”

“Of course!” Janet beamed brightly, turning to handle her order as if they hadn’t just been yelling at each other.

Sarah cringed, mouthing sorry to him and Steve just gave her a small smile and a wave of his hand, indicating it was okay. She probably knew what was happening. The whole town had known he’d dated Janet for a while. Hell, he was sure the whole town knew how he’d broken her heart because she’d probably made sure they all knew. 

She thanked Janet as she took the snacks and traded her money before heading off, turning back once to look back at Steve with sympathy. Everyone knew Janet was a bit crazy. He just wished he’d known before he decided to ask her out. He wished he’d listened when his best friend told him she was after meeting her once but it probably would have already been too late by then. She’d been a stage five clinger from the first date. 

“Steve,” she began, shaking her head, pulling her gloves off and flinging them in the trash can. “You didn’t see the two of them together. I did. That was epic, once in a lifetime love. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life living in some man’s shadow? Because that is all you will be to her, a pale comparison of what she had before.”

“You don’t know anything about her and I, and it’s none of your damn business!”

“It is my business! It is! I gave you everything. I took care of you. I bent over backward to be everything you wanted and you still threw me to the side like I was nothing but trash!”

“I didn’t throw you anywhere! And maybe that’s the problem. You shouldn’t mold yourself into what you think someone wants. Then that’s not really what they want and that’s not fair to you. Why would you want to be with someone if you have to pretend?”

“I wasn’t pretending! I’m telling you, if you head down this road, you’re just going to wind up heartbroken. She will never need you like you need to be needed. You will never be number one for her because he always will. You will never be the most important. And you and I both know how much you want that.”

Her words hit their mark. He would never tell her that. And how the hell did she know him that well? Robin had said all those same things to him. How he craved to be the most important to someone because he’d never been to anyone else. But now he had Robin and he knew he was pretty damn high on her list. Not to mention Dustin. That kid relied on him for damn near everything. 

But what if he couldn’t ever be that person for you? What if you looked at him and just saw the next best option? Like he was the store brand version of your name brand husband? What if he couldn’t ever have all of you because part of you had been buried in that casket with him? 

When Steve envisioned a life with the person he was meant to be with, he envisioned them having all of him, him having all of them. Two people who were so connected that nothing could come between them because they were a force that nothing could break. But could he have that with someone who’d already had that? 

“You know I’m right, don’t you?” she smirked, one eyebrow lifting smugly. “She might be a pretty package but she’ll never truly be yours. That gift tag has someone else’s name on it. Dead or not, it doesn’t change that.”

He was saved from responding when the door swung open, Ryan, the other dad who had volunteered, entering. Before he could even get a word out, Steve was gone, pushing past him and into the gymnasium. As if all the doubts Janet had just put in his head would be locked behind that door too when it shut behind him. 

Weaving through running children hurrying from one game to the next, his head was on a swivel, looking for any sign of you or the boys. The entire place was chaos, a constant drone of conversation, squealing, and feet smacking against the linoleum. He hadn’t made it halfway through when a little body slammed into his legs, arms wrapping around him. He looked down, expecting to see his own son but finding Eli instead. 

“Steve! Steve, you have to come see! They have a reptile guy here and he has real snakes! There’s a python that’s like ten hundred feet long!”

You stood just behind him, Jeremiah next to you. You offered him an uncertain smile and he gave one back. He had no idea where you stood. No idea where your head was at after that embarrassing scene in the concession booth. 

Hell, he had no idea where you stood, period. He was hoping you would get a chance to talk tonight. But between the boys and Janet, that wasn’t looking likely. He knew the two of you had crossed the line, and rather quickly. He didn’t regret it. That moment in your kitchen had been playing on a loop in his brain ever since. But he needed to know how you were feeling about it all. Were you officially a couple? Or were you thinking that was a mistake that you wished you could take back? You really might be after what just happened. 

Eli grabbed his hand and Steve allowed himself to be dragged across the gym. He responded appropriately with wide eyes and gasps as the boys made him look at every single reptile the guy had from iguanas to a python that was not ten hundred feet long but still pretty damn big. But the whole time his mind was on you, on what you were thinking right now, what you were feeling. He was dying to talk to you, to find out. He wished he could peer into your brain. Were you feeling for him the way he was for you? Or was this just a stepping stone, like Robin had been scared of, a jumping off point for you to move on from the man who’d truly made you happy?

The two of you followed the boys from game to game, dutifully holding any prizes they won. You spoke, your words polite but clipped, uncomfortable and he hated it. The boys didn’t seem to be aware but he sure was. Steve stepped up at the game where you threw a ball at pins and won a goldfish for Eli. 

“Mommy, look!” he shrieked, holding the bag up proudly. “Steve got me a fish! I’m going to name him Flash. I know Flash is red and he’s orange but I bet he can swim really fast.”

You smiled at your son, trying to convey excitement but your eyes weren’t quite showing it, “Oh fun.” You looked up at Steve, so exasperated but damn if you didn’t look cute. “Now we need a bowl and food.”

“Sorry,” he offered when the boys raced ahead, leaving you holding the newest member of the family. “I guess I didn’t really think about the ramifications of winning a living creature.”

“It’s fine,” you sighed. “My biggest concern is keeping this damn thing alive. If Eli sees him belly-up, he’s going to be heartbroken. And with a fish, the chances of that are pretty likely.”

“I can stop and grab supplies on the way out of here and drop them off for you,” he offered.

“Oh, you don’t have to do that.”

“Of course I do. It’s my fault you now have a fish to house and feed. It’s not a big deal. I can even help him get Flash all set up if you’d like.”

He wanted you to say yes. He wanted another reason to see you. He wanted an opportunity to talk to you, somewhere away from all the nosey residents of this town. And he was kind of hoping that maybe the boys would head off to Eli’s room and give you some time alone. Time for you to hash all of this out and figure out what exactly was happening here. 

You swallowed, your eyes off in the distance and he feared you were going to say no but then you turned to him, smiling. 

“Okay. Thanks. I don’t really know anything about keeping a fish alive so that would be helpful.”

Steve shrugged, “It’s not that hard. Not a goldfish anyway. They just need some freshwater, a bowl, and some fish food. I can get a couple fun things for in the bowl too. Some fish are more complicated. My uncle had an aquarium and he had saltwater fish and that’s a pain in the ass. You have to make sure the water is the right PH and everything. But goldfish are pretty basic.”

By the time the carnival was coming to a close, the boys had exhausted every single activity, many more than once. They had maximized their time and the very full bag of cheap prizes that Steve was holding proved it. The baked goods had been a hit. Even Laurie had approached you to tell you how amazing your treats had been, leaving you with that pink blush to your cheeks that Steve loved so much. 

The boys were moving much more slowly as they made their way to the parking lot, the energy they’d exuded in the gym finally starting to catch up to them. 

“You know, if Jere is really tired, you don’t have to run to the store,” you told him. “I can always go tomorrow. Hopefully this guy can survive in a bag for one night.”

“Nah, he’ll be fine. Watch.” He turned to the boys. “Hey Jere. We’re gonna stop at the store to grab some stuff for Flash and take it to Eli’s. You good with that or are you two tired to go to his house?”

Jeremiah’s face lit up, his exhaustion forgotten as he bounced on his toes, “Yeah!”

“See?” teased Steve with a laugh. “He’s good at bouncing right back when he’s excited.”

“Can we have another sleepover?” asked Eli. “Jeremiah hasn’t stayed at our house and then he can hang out with Flash too. We can sleep in my room. My bed is big so we’ll both fit!”

You sighed, smiling, looking over at Steve who shrugged, letting you know he was okay with it if you were. You looked back at the boys, opening your arms wide. 

“Alright. Why not?”

“Yes!” both boys shrieked at the same time.

“Well, then why don’t I just take Jere back with me?” you asked. “The boys can play for a bit until you get there with the fish stuff.”

“Sounds good to me.”

“Bye daddy!” Jeremiah yelled, jumping in your backseat with Eli. 

“Well, alright then. See you in a bit, okay?”

“See you in a bit,” you smiled. 

Steve walked to his car, hope blossoming in his chest, a tiny green sprout of hope that this would work out in his favor. If he could play his cards right and hang long enough, until the boys were passed out, then you could finally have the conversation you needed to have. And then he would know. Either that sprout would spread and bloom or wilt and die. 

Chapter 12

Taglist: @katethetank@roxiehorrorshow@sapphire4082@bakugouswh0r3@frostandflamesfanfic @mix-matchsocks @mushy-mushroom04 @palmtreesx3 @littlebookworm86 @eddies-trailer-babe @cheesewritings @emilyj444 @daisyhollyxox @angelbabyivy @the-fairy-anon @loritate7311

Thanks so much for taking the time to read my little story! Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist. 😊 And replies and reblogs are always appreciated if you enjoy it. ❤️❤️❤️

#dad steve harrington #steve harrington #singledad!steveharrington #steve harrington single dad #steve harrington fanfiction #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington smut #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington x fem #steve harrington x you #steve harrington fic #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington imagine #fluff #smut #fluff and smut #romance #second chance romance #second chance at love #widow #divorced dad steve harrington #slow burn #robin buckley #robin and steve #dustin henderson #max mayfield #mike wheeler #eleven hopper

[frikatilhi]

Jere, after drinking glögi that's more stolis than berry juice, trying to explain that he is serious about loving Bojan but he can't find the right words in English and he gets really frustrated so he ends up crying.

That's it. That's the fic.

no no no that is nOT the fic there has to be more?

Like something about Bojan propping him up as they make their way home from whatever fun they were having, and Jere trying to find the words for most important and sincere and earnest and quixotic and horny and soulmate

And he's babbling in Finnish and very sloppy English and Bojan is trying to humour him as he herds him through the streets, and says yes I understand, it's going to be okay, and finally Jere just loses it, right there in the middle of a pedestrian crossing, and yells at him how sä et ymmärrä, mikset sä tajuu, it is LOVE you idiot

and Bojan is trying to save him from getting hit by too many cars and trying to hug him and tell him that of course it is, I know, I love you too, lets just get you home ok??

Fuck me, Bojan, Jere shouts, and Bojan goes ha ha, we're back to insults now, are we, well that's better, more like yourself already

And that makes Jere break down for real, full on crying with snot and everything, and Bojan gives up and they sit on on the curb and all Jere manages is not this, not this, not this brother bullshit, and realisation starts to dawn on Bojan

And then it's I promise, me too Jere, I promise, but in the morning, ok? Come to me in the morning and I will

the end so there

#ask #bojere #not!fic #IDK EITHER DON'T @ ME

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

hii can i req an enemies to lovers jeremiah fic where the reader receives some bad news while they’re at the boardwalk and jeremiah is the only one that notices reader’s mood change and comforts her? thank you! :)

They're not quite lovers, but hopefully this is enough

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

Although you had similar personalities, you and Jeremiah never got along. Every summer, you would come to Cousins for Belly’s birthday and the two of you would always get into silly arguments. Last year, the two of you got into a serious karaoke competition which ended with Steven unplugging the karaoke, sick of hearing your showdown of Grease numbers. 

‘’It’s your and Jeremiah’s turn,’’ Belly said excitedly, scanning the arcade for a suitable arena of rivalry. A mischievous grin crept onto her face. ‘’It’s a shame there’s no karaoke machine.’’ 

‘’I think it’s a relief,’’ Steven mumbled, not wanting to revisit that cacophonous memory.

You hit his arm, feigning offense. ‘’Hey!’’ 

‘’Oh, I think I know.’’ Taylor pointed at a Dance Dance Revolution machine near the pinball games.

This was perfect for you and Jeremiah. You preferred singing than dancing, but you were confident in your ability to win this particular dance-off. With a determined grin, you took your place at the machine, positioning yourself.

‘’Ready to lose?’’ Jeremiah asked, shooting you a cocky smile, his lips curving with unmistakable self-assuredness.

You met his arrogance with a knowing shake of your head, your eyes locked onto the screen in front of you. ‘’Don’t be so confident, Fisher.’’ 

Ariana Grande’s Side to Side began playing and colored arrows cascaded down the screen, urging you to synchronize your feet. You got this, you told yourself.

Beside you, Jeremiah was fast on his feet and initially appeared to have the upper hand. Yet, as the song progressed, a hint of strain crossed his features, starting to struggle with the speed. The concentrated focus was evident in the furrowed brow he sported, hearing more and more ‘excelent’s and ‘perfect’s popping on your screen. 

Belly and Taylor were cheering you, already calling the win while the boys pressed Jeremiah to do better. Unfortunately — for them —, they distracted him more than anything. 

Eventually, the last notes of the song echoed and you jumped in triumph, a victory grin plastered on your face as Belly and Taylor rushed over to hug you, adding a second victory to your team.

The competition continued, but first you made a stop for refreshers before braving the outside temperature again. 

You grabbed your raspberry lemonade from the counter and went to the side to wait for the others. A chim came from your pocket and you pulled out your phone, seeing an email notification that had just come in. You quickly opened it, and your winning smile fell. You had been waiting for this email since you got in the car with Taylor and Steven, hoping for a positive reply. Sadly, it’s not what you got. 

Seeing you frowning at your phone, Jeremiah came over and nudged your elbow. ‘’Why the frown?’’ he quipped, a playful glint in his eyes. ‘’You just beat me at Dance Dance Revolution. I thought you would be savoring your victory and rubbing it in my face for the next hours.’’ 

‘’I didn’t get accepted to the musical camp I applied to,’’ you explained without looking up from your screen, fighting the silly tears that were brimming your eyes. ‘’I worked so hard on my application and audition tape. I really thought I had this…’’ 

You expected him to laugh at you for applying to musical camp, but he didn’t. Instead, Jeremiah looped an arm around your shoulders and offered you a small hug of compassion. The gesture surprised you, but you didn’t push him off.  

‘’Don't let this email ruin your day, okay? It’s their loss,’’ he said, trying to cheer you up. ‘’You’re the best Sandy I even dueted with.’’ 

You managed to offer a faint smile in response to his sincerity. ‘’Thanks, Jere. You’re not a terrible Danny either.’’ 

He chuckled softly as he pulled back, the sound like a soothing melody. ‘’Shall we get back to the others, Sandy? Or do we ditch them and go on a ride?’’

—

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#jeremiah fisher #jeremiah fisher x reader #jeremiah fisher imagine #jeremiah fisher fanfic #the summer i turned pretty imagine #the summer I turned pretty #tsitp

[shirtlessradfahrer]

So I've been politically active since before I was even eligible to vote. I've followed North American politics near religiously since 2014, and I've been a card-carrying member of my country's most prominent left-wing party since before the start of the pandemic. I barely slept at all during the week Ukraine was full-scale invaded, and I've been stressed about it every day for the last two years, given that my grandfather was born there and I've very much wanted to visit someday. And this was all before the horrific debacle of October 7th, and the subsequent atrocities committed against Gaza practically every day since. Lately I've weaned myself off a lot of international news and been more active in local politics because that's where I feel my efforts have been more effective, but...

...the reality is I am tired. I am so fucking tired.

I blacklisted just about everything remotely political when I made this blog because I wanted this space to be my escape from all of that. He is my escape from all of that. A badly needed one, because between the state of the world, the state of my country, the state of my workplace and the state of my personal life, my mental health has been....not very good for most of this decade and last.

I know this is unhealthily cynical, but as someone who had some pretty shitty friends in the past, and continues to have some incredibly shitty family members, including my own father (who, despite having Käärijä levels of charisma and putting on an excellent act in public, has repeatedly hurt me and let me and others down when we needed him most)....I expect famous people I admire to disappoint me. I very much expect famous men I admire to disappoint me. It may be in three days, or in three months, or in three years, or in thirty years, but it will happen at least once, if not multiple times.

Which is why I don’t-and never have-looked up to musicians or any other celebrity for guidance on my political or moral beliefs. It's a surefire way to set yourself up for not only disappointment but feelings of betrayal towards someone who was never "loyal" to you in the first place. And I wish so many people didn't learn that lesson far too late.

I don't like Jere Mikael Pöyhönen because of his insightful commentary on the state of geopolitics. To be extremely blunt, I like him because he's hot and he entertains me, both of which bring me happiness. Once I no longer feel that happiness, I'll move on to other interests, just as I always have. It would be very nice, however, if that day came in thirty years rather than in three. Which is why I felt relief when he expressed his wish to remain politically neutral, even regarding politics in his own country.

That being said....am I disappointed he went to you-know-what? Yes, for reasons both political and non-political. Am I disappointed that he willingly interacted on camera with you-know-who? Yes. In fact there are several things he has done and people he has associated with that I'm not particularly happy about. But in this case do I understand WHY he went and why he interacted with them? Also yes.

I don't believe he had any malicious intent, quite the opposite. His kindness is both his greatest strength and his greatest weakness-he is kind to the point that he foolishly undermines his own credibility. I don't know if there's an equivalent of Hanlon's Razor in Finnish but it goes "never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity".

And.....well. This is a guy who couldn't tell the Ukrainian esc23 representatives from the Greek ones. Who didn't know what the trans flag was until he was personally handed one last year. Who, AFAIK, has never received any sort of higher education (vocational school would still sort of be considered such where I live, but whatever) not that that automatically makes someone "smart" and others "stupid", but it can and often does help with understanding international issues. And based on my overall experience with hockey fans/players (of which he's both)...they typically aren't terminally online debating anything besides individual player and team statistics.

So I'm not shocked that he didn't think about how Just Being Nice on camera with that representative would look to others outside of his own bubble. How that would not have looked particularly "neutral". But he should have, considering this isn't the first time he's had to deal with angry internet mobs coming after him for a relatively minor mistake. Considering his favourite band got into very hot water last year and dealt with the controversy very poorly for too long.

Is it fair that I can block some tags, turn off the tv, and get on with my day, while he has to worry about his image the moment he leaves home? No. But...this is the inevitable downside of the life he wanted. Unlike me, he now has an audience of millions, a not-insignificant number of whom are going to be thinking about this stuff, meaning he needs to as well. And if not, he needs to pay someone to think about it for him. Goodness knows he can afford it now. I can do without all that pyro if it means none of us have another week like this one.

#käärijä #sorry this was still more rambling than i intended #but i wanted to give personal context as to why i appreciate his neutral stance #and why i don't like putting celebrities on such high pedestals #also fuck the ebu #for so many reasons #they don't deserve him

[mitamicah]

An aromantic autistic reading of Joker Out's "Bluza"/"the Blouse"

I have a few words about Bluza. The Blouse.

When I first heard the title, I felt a connection to this song yet in a very tongue-in-cheek way. Because I read the working title was a nod to the white holed sweater blouse (the slut shirt) Bojan forgot at Jere’s place last autumn. But then thanks to JokerOutSubs I realized that this song really speaks to me in another way.

Disclaimer: I am speaking about this from an autistic aroace point of view and as a person who has masked most their lives and doesn’t drink. I hope to explain why this matters in the post below.

The lines that especially spoke to me are these: Ja ko pijana budala Ali čaše nisam popio Jamislim da sam se zaljubio u tebe

I’m acting like a drunk idiot But I haven’t had a single glass I think I’ve fallen in love with you

As a person who has spend most my life being critical about what to say, do, and how I show of myself to people I see the drunkenness described here not as literal but as a form of unmasking. When you find that one person you feel so comfortable around that you know that they won’t leave you or care if you stop being presentable in the eyes of society.

The result is that you may seem drunk and out of character when you are close to them. Drunk as in unlike yourself but also much more yourself. You dare to be authentic and to be silly and vulnerable because this person next to you gets you. No alcohol you could consume would fill you with as much giddiness as being with this person does. There is something about this one person that just speaks to you and let you know that you are safe.

While not having been drunk myself this is what I expect is the feeling most drunk people are searching for: the experience of not caring about what other people might think about them anymore. They just exist outside time and space in a bubble of bliss.

The person in the song is that for Bojan. His bubble of bliss – his safe space.

I’ve been lucky enough to have people like that too for small periods of time. And just like the next line I have felt very strongly connected to the person in those moments thinking “is this was love feels like?”. And here I don’t necessarily mean romantic attraction/love. I mean love as in a deeper, more profound level. The love that is outside of bodily desire. It is two spirits – two beings finding a home in the other person. A home where you can be giddy and drunk without having touch a single drink.

It is no secret that I love the idea of queer platonic love. When I read this, I read it as queer platonic. I read it as beautifully strange, brotherly, romantic, and platonic all at once.

The chorus kind of develops this feeling and adds and aromantic layer to it: Baš ja Koji nisam verovao Da za nekim biću lud

Yes, me who didn’t believe I would be crazy about someone

I read this as a very much an aspec experience.

You may have gone most of your life feeling othered for not experiencing those feelings of romantic attraction the world around you constantly tell you that you should.

Then this person comes along. This person that is your haven, that you can fool around with and open up around. There’s something that seems different, seems honest and so it brings you that feeling of bliss I mentioned earlier. That feeling the world around you have tried to tell you exists for years, yet you never believed would happen to you.

You may have believed yourself to be broken or maybe the world around you too much for seemingly being crazy about love. But now in this moment of bliss, drunk without having drunk, you get it. You want to be with this person, do all the silly things the media tells you are romantic. Not because you are forced to but because it would mean spending more time with your person. And every little second you can spend with your person feels like a blessing.

That is my take on the song at least. Thank you for reading.

#my first try making an analysis that I can remember so please be kind #I just couldn't stop thinking about it #almost cried when I read the lyrics #and this may just be a sappy song idk but it spoke to me this way #so I offer you my aro and ausitic reading of it it here #thank you to jokeroutsubs for the quick translation that gave me the chance to babble about this song #I feel so honored having been in the crowd that heard it the first time live :'3 #I really adore sta bih ja too but mostly for how catchy it is #it is pretty as well when you know the lyrics #but this prechorus chorus just spoke to my aching queer platonic aro heart #okay I am done venting now #joker out #bluza #the blouse #mine #micahs thoughts

[perfectlywrongformend3s]

Babe-Jeremiah Fisher

A/n: This song describes him so well. If you don't understand then I'm sorry, I would tell you but I would be spoiling the books. But I'm team Conrad all the way so yes he's my favorite. Jere isn't really my favorite, but I love Gavin. He's so funny. But please enjoy this one!

Song: Babe

Written: Sugarland (feat: Taylor Swift)

-Samantha

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

'What a shame, Didn't wanna be the one that got away, yeah, Big mistake, broke the sweetest promise, That you never should have made, I'm here on the kitchen floor, you call, but I won't hear it, You said " No one else" '

Your POV

My head was resting on my arms while watching my phone ring for the tenth time this evening. I didn't have the heart to pick it up just to hear Jere's excuse or apologize. The only thing I had going through my head was the day he told me about him sleeping with someone he knew at his school.

That day is so clear to me and it hurts so much just thinking about it. I really wonder if Conrad or Belly knew about this. Hell or even Steven, Laurel and Susanna. I want to call one of them, but I'm so scared about Jeremiah knowing and trying to get the phone to talk to me.

Jeremiah's POV

I stood outside holding my phone and let out a frustrated groan. I just don't know understand why she won't let me explain myself. I was about to call her again when I heard someone speak.

" I would just give her space, Jere."

I turned to find Belly. " I can't stand her not answering. I really need her to hear her voice." I said

She let out a sigh. " Jere, you know what you di..."

I looked back at her and looked away with guilt. " I know! I don't need everyone reminding me!" I said loudly

Before either of us could say anything Conrad and Steven came running out.

" Guys chill." Steven said

I let out a small scoff and turned the other way. " Bro, we know you're upset even though you basically chose that path for yourself, so don't go yelling at any of us." Conrad said

I could hear all three of their footsteps return back inside. I made myself sit down on one of the lounge chairs while holding my phone in my hand.

Your POV

'What a waste, Takin' down pictures and the plans we made, yeah, And it's strange how your face doesn't look so innocent, Your secret had it's consequence and that's on you, babe'

I made myself move to my bedroom so I could throw all the pictures out. I knew if I didn't it would just haunt me for what he did to me. I couldn't get that night out of my head. The next thing I knew was the tears were running down my face. I couldn't make them stop even if I wanted them too.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I felt the sun on the side of my face which told me that I probably cried myself to sleep last night. I heard my phone ding, so I looked at it just to make sure it wasn't Jere, but when I saw Connie texted me I was shocked to say the least.

'Hey, um Jere...may be my idiot brother, but I'm always here if you want to talk. I'm always one call away even though you live like two houses down.'

I let out a breathy laugh and text him back. I then got up to see my room trashed. I decided to take time to get myself together.

'Flashback'

I was sitting on the couch in the Fisher's house waiting for Jere to come, since we had plans today. I was starting to get worried when I heard his laugh come from the front of the door. I walked up there to find him talking to someone.

'Since you admitted it (oh), I keep picturin' (oh), Her lips on your neck (oh), I can't unsee it (oh), I hate that because of you (oh), I can't love you, babe what a shame, didn't want to be the one that get away'

"Jere?" I said

He turned around with a surprised look. " Wh...at are you do...ing here?" he stuttered

I looked at him confused. " Um...we made plans, remember."

He turned back to the girl he was talking to, before turning back to me. " Can we talk in my room?" He whispered

I nodded my head. I heard him telling the girl that they would talk soon. When I made it to his room I couldn't make myself sit, so I decided to just stand in the middle of his room.

" I know what you're thinking, but..." Jere started while walking in

" But what, Jere?" I asked

He just looked down. I could just tell that there was more to the story here. " Jere, please just tell me." I whispered trying not to show any emotion

He looked up through his lashes and said, " Tell you what?"

I looked at him with hope that it's not true, but deep down I knew it already. " The truth." I begged

" I think you already figured that out." he said

I could feel the tears starting to fall. " No, no, no." I whispered more to myself

I let out a choked sob before falling to my knees, I knew I should get up and leave, but all I could feel was numbness. " I'm so sorry." He whispered while pulling me into a hug. I pushed him off me, I looked at him through my blurry vision. " Don't touch me!"

He nodded and moved back. I made myself get up to walk to my house away from him and everyone.

Conrad's POV

I was heading to go to the kitchen to grab a drink, but saw Y/n heading for the door. I thought Jere and her were going out. I walked up closer to her only to realize she was crying. I gently placed my hand on her shoulder. I could feel her tense up which made my heart break a little for her. " Hey, Y/n/n. Tell me what's wrong?" I said concerned

She just shook her head. I pulled her in for a hug which she immediately melted into. " Ask your idiotic brother." She whimpered

She pulled away and gave me a small sad smile before heading out. I ran back upstairs to Jere's room. " What the hell did you do to her?" I said

He looked up. " Nothing."

I gave him a look. " Bull Jere. Tell me what you did."  

He just stared down at his hands. I whispered, " You didn't cheat on her did you." I held my breath praying it wasn't true. When he didn't answer I was shocked. " OMG!" I paused " Jere, come on! You had the best girl you could have asked for." I stated

All I got from him was silent. I shook my head in disappointment and walked out.

'How could you do this babe? You really blew this, babe, We ain't gettin' through this one, babe, How could you do this babe? This is the last time, This is the last time, This is the last time I'll ever call you, babe,'

Your POV

All I could think about was it was my fault. Did I do something to drive him to do this? I cried to my mom all night. I knew she didn't like seeing me like this, and I felt bad for piling all this on her when she already had her problems.

'Flashback Ends'

'How could you do this, babe? I'm here on the kitchen floor, you call, but I won't hear it, You said "No one else," We ain't gettin' through this one, babe, I break down every time you call, but I won't hear it, This is the last time, We're a wreck, you're the wreckin' ball, This is the last time, You said " no one else", This is the last time, I'll ever call you, "babe". '

Once again I'm in my kitchen sitting on the floor this time watching my phone go off with a picture of Jere and I. I know I shouldn't be crying because he doesn't deserve my tears, but I couldn't help it. I want to text him or at least answer just to tell him it's been over since I found out that he cheated on me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I knew I was going to regret the next decision I was going to make, but I had to tell him. I picked my phone up and went to our messages. I hesitated to write, but I knew it would make me somewhat better that he knew.

' Hey Jere, this is hard for me to say, but I know I need to say it. I would love for you to stop calling me for now, maybe just maybe in the near future we can be friends, but that's not an option right now. I just want you to know what you did really broke me and it's hard like really hard for me right now, so this thing with you and I is over and has been over ever since you the day you admitted to cheating. So this is my last good-bye, Jere.'

My thumb was right over the send button. I don't know why it won't push it. It's like my body is numb, or it's telling me not to let go. I know I need to let go and accept that it's happening. I forced my hand to move. Once it was sent I dropped my phone and the tears came down faster.

Jeremiah's POV

I heard my phone ding. I saw that she texted me. I started reading it and broke down. I only kept telling myself how stupid I am and it was making me feel even worse about the whole thing that I did. I just had to accept the fate that this thing with Y/n and I was really over.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Omg! I feel like this one is pretty good. I feel like my writing is getting somewhat better these past years and I'm proud to say this. And I am so thankful for all you for reading and commenting plus voting. It makes me so happy! Again I really hope you enjoy this one!

-Samantha

#jeremiah fisher #the summer i turned pretty #jeremiah fisher x #jeremiah fisher x y/n #jeremiah fisher x reader #Jeremiah fisher x you #jeremiah fisher angst #Jeremiah fisher one-shot #jeremiah fisher fanfic #mine #angst #jeremiah fisher fic #jeremiah fisher imagine

[stylesxreads]

Just Friends (part 2)

Part 1

Pairing: Conrad Fisher x Reader

Summary: Y/N has been in love with Conrad since she could remember. They grew up together, spent every summer of their lives together. Conrad is her sun and she would do anything to bask in him all day. Conrad is confusing to say the least. Y/N decides this is the summer that things change. This is the summer they won’t be just friends.

Warnings: alcohol, drugs, cursing, smut? , cancer, underage drinking

~~~

Needless to say Conrad didn’t join the rest of you guys for a movie that night. Even though you were sat in the living room, eyes glued to the screen, your mind was somewhere else.

Conrad has never been so short and irritable. Nobody else seemed to notice, or care at least. They were so engrossed in the movie, Belly and John sat together on the couch, Jere and Steven laid in the floor and you sat in the side chair. The same one that Conrad was sitting in earlier that day.

You glanced at your phone, hoping to see his contact name on the screen. It wasn’t there. You sighed, sinking into your seat knowing Conrad was long gone for the night.

“Y/n.” Your eyes followed the voice behind you. Susannah stood at the hallway, her hand waving you over. You got up immediately, she grabbed onto your hand and pulled you out onto the front porch.

You both sat on the swinging chair in silence, she held your hand tightly. It wasn’t abnormal for you and Susannah to disappear together. You both loved spending time together, she would take you on lunch dates or shopping or you would paint with her for hours.

“What’s going in with Conrad?” You asked quietly, unsure if you should even bring it up. Susannah sighed deeply.

“I’m not too sure, honestly.. he’s been really sad lately. It started when he broke up with Aubrey a few months ago.” She explained.

Aubrey? He was so torn up about Aubrey? Last time you talked about Aubrey he told you he wasn’t all too into her. It just doesn’t make sense.

“Maybe you can talk to him.” She suggested. “He was smiling when he saw you. I saw it. Maybe you can get through to him.”

Highly unlikely after the conversation you just had with him. But you nodded your head anyways, wanting to make Susannah happy. You hoped you would be the one to help Conrad out of his funk. You wanted to be the one to make him smile. You wanted to be the one to make him happy.

“I want this summer to be perfect.” She whispered, there was a hint of sadness in her voice that you heard. You couldn’t understand why but you could tell she meant it.

“It will be.” You smiled, encouraging her but also trying to giving yourself a little hope too.

***

The next morning you were the first one awake, as usual. You didn’t like sleeping in when you were in Cousins. Sleeping in meant you were wasting precious daylight. Precious time with Conrad.

The sun was starting to rise by the time you finished brushing your teeth and changing. You poured yourself a cup of coffee and made your way towards the beach to watch the sun rise.

Your first sunrise of the summer. You settled in a spot just off the shore, cradling your coffee cup in your hand as the slight breeze ran through your hair. A small shiver shot through your body at the cool air touching your skin.

You sighed happily. There was nothing like watching the sun rise on the beach. It was perfect. Well, almost perfect.

“Hey.” Your head whipped to your left, Conrad stood beside you, coffee mug in hand. You lifted your eyes up to meet his before turning back towards the ocean.

“Good morning.” You said shortly. You felt his eyes on you, feeling incredibly small and uncomfortable next to him. Your free hand ran over your arm softly, warming up the goosebumps that covered it.

“Here.” Conrad shrugged off his jacket and placing it over your shoulders. You were instantly comforted by the warmth of his jacket, taking a deep breath. It smelt like him and you never wanted to take it off.

You muttered a soft thank you as he sat down on the sand next to you, your shoulders touching slightly.

You hated the way you got butterflies from the small contact. Conrad gave you butterflies without even having to do anything.

A comfortable silence settled over the both of you as you watched the sky, the only noise was the sound of the waves crashing and the birds chirping. It was peaceful.

It was almost like a tradition for you and Conrad to watch the sunrise/sunset together. It was never really planned but somehow you both always ended up at the beach at the early hours of the day to witness the sunrise.

It became your thing. And everyone knew if the two of you were out the house at the crack of dawn you’d be at the beach together.

After last night you just assumed it would be just you today, expecting Conrad to stay at home still upset.

“About last night..” Conrad sighed.

“Con.. it’s okay.” You interrupted him. “It’s not a big deal.. just forget it.” You didn’t want to talk about it. You didn’t like having conflicts with Conrad.

“Well I’m sorry for leaving the way I did. I’m sorry for leaving you with that mess.” He apologized, you nodded your head.

“What’s going on with you Con?” You turned your head to look at him. His eyes were fixed forward, not daring to look at you because he knew he’d break.

“I don’t know why everyone keeps saying that.” He huffed, a small frown forming on his face.

“Maybe because something is obviously happening and you’re not letting anyone help you.”

“There is nothing happening!” He raised his voice slightly. “Everyone thinks something crazy is happening just because I quit football. Nothing is happening.” He huffed.

You continued to stare at him, knowing he wasn’t telling the truth. Something was definitely bothering him and this reaction only proved it. But you didn’t push him any further, he would talk to you when he was ready. Hopefully.

“Okay.. sorry.” You whispered softly, ending the topic. It was only your second day here and it was obvious that this summer is going to be different. But you’re not entirely sure if that was a good thing.

“Come on.. let’s go get muffins. My treat.” Conrad stood from his spot holding his hand out for you to grab onto, helping you to your feet. His arm slung around your shoulder as you walked back towards your house to put the cups away.

You didn’t get any new information, you didn’t know what was bothering Conrad but you didn’t want that to ruin the rest of your day or the rest of your summer for that matter.

By the time you guys entered the Fisher’s home with the muffins, everyone was already awake and spread around the kitchen. Jere and Belly were cooking eggs and pancakes at the stove and John and Steven were playing cards at the table while the moms drank their coffee.

Conrad placed the box of muffins on the table, opening it up and grabbing the two biggest muffins with the most sugar crystals sprinkled on top before everyone could snatch up one. He sauntered over to you and handed you the bigger one of the two before settling next to his mom at the table.

Belly bumped hips with you, handing you a plate of pancakes and eggs.

“And where were you two off to so early in the morning?” She wiggled her shoulders playfully at you. You rolled your eyes with a small smile.

“Just watched the sun rise and got muffins. Nothing weird.” You shot back. You and Conrad always watched the sunrise together it was normal.

“Uh huh sure. Are you going to the bonfire tonight?” Belly grinned.

“Of course, when do I not go?” You laughed.

“Do you think I could tag along this year?” She asked with a hopeful smile. You thought about it for a second, Belly’s turning 16 next week…. So why not?

“Sure. But you have to be responsible. Don’t do anything stupid.” You pointed a finger at her. “It’ll be fun though. I get tired of being with the other guys all by myself.” You shrugged.

So later that day when the moms were settled on the couch in your living room you left for the Fisher’s house to meet with Belly. She didn’t know what to wear or how to do her makeup.

The guys had already left, probably already drunk off their asses. Belly was digging through her duffel bag trying to find an outfit.

You laughed, seeing how overly stressed she was.

“Here, let me look.” You pulled out a simple pink dress and threw it at her. “You don’t need to dress up or anything.” You chuckled. Hell you were wearing shorts and a simple tank top.

“You look beautiful Belly.” You smiled at her as she fixed her hair. Clipping it back slightly. She grinned, feeling completely confident in herself.

“Ready.” She smiled one more time before you two snuck downstairs and out the house.

Just as you thought the bonfire was already going, music blared through the air along with the constant chatter of everyone there.

“Hey! You made it!” Your head turned to a guy you were unfamiliar with but he wasn’t looking at you, he was looking at Belly.

“Yup. Here I am.” She chuckled awkwardly.

“Here have a beer.” He smiled offering her the bottle in his hand. Belly was quit to reject his offer, which seemed to have annoyed him pretty badly.

“She’s fine. Thanks though.” You cut in, grabbing Belly’s arm and dragging her away.

“Who the fuck is that?” You furrowed your eyebrows, not liking his vibe at all.

“Some dude I met at the gas station, forget about him. He’s weird.” She grimaced.

“Belly?” Steven’s voice filled your ears and he approached the both of you. “What the hell is she doing here, y/n?” He narrowed his eyes at the both of us.

“Relax. She’s about to turn 16. Let her live a little. Go suck face with that girl.” You rolled your eyes and gestured to the girl he was just making out with.

“Y/n!! Belly!! You’re both here! Now we can really have some fun!” Jeremiah came and slung his arms around the both of you.

“Keep an eye on her.” Steven said to you and Jere before going back to the girl he was with.

You turned to Jere, asking him where Conrad was.

“He’s around here somewhere. I think he’s with Nicole.” Jere shrugged grabbing Belly’s hand and dragging her to the cooler full of drinks.

Nicole? Who the hell is Nicole?

Your eyes searched the dark beach, looking for that mop of brown hair. Your heart dropped when you spotted the all too familiar grey jacket wrapped around a young lady. 

The same jacket that was wrapped around you this morning. 

Then his eyes met yours and you swore that his body stiffened at the sudden eye contact. Your eyes were stuck on him, glancing every so often at the girl basically sitting on his lap. 

You shook your head slightly, feeling your heart become heavy. Your feet began to move before you could even think. You wanted to get out of there. You needed to get out of there.

You picked up your pace, till you felt your feet touch the concrete of the sidewalk.

You felt stupid to think that maybe Conrad would see you differently this summer. You guys are best friends. You’re sure you will always be just friends to Conrad.

Before you could even realize what was happening you felt tears fall from your eyes. It was stupid really, you shouldn’t be crying over a boy that’s not yours. A stupid little crush. 

You sniffled up your snot and wiped your tears, taking a deep breathe. You swore to yourself that that was the last time you’d cry over Conrad. You shook your head, laughing softly to yourself at how ridiculous you were acting. 

“Y/n!” You heard his voice call from behind you, but you didn’t look back, you didn’t stop walking. 

His footsteps became louder, running towards you before you felt his hand wrap around your arm, spinning you to face him.

“Y/n, where are you going?” He panted, his eyes searching your face. 

“Home. I’m not really in the drinking mood.” You said dryly. You couldn’t get the image of Nicole wrapped up in Conrad’s arms. You wanted to get away from him right now.

“Look whatever you think you saw-” 

“It doesn’t matter what I saw. You can do whatever you want.” You furrowed your eyebrows, taking a step back from him. “Who even is she? I’ve never seen her before and you never mentioned a new girlfriend.” 

“She’s not my girlfriend, God Y/n.” He rolled his eyes, running his hand through his hair. “Her names Nicole. I took her to the deb ball last summer after you guys left early. She’s just a friend.” 

“The deb ball? I thought the deb ball was stupid?” You cocked your head to the side. “The only reason I didn’t do the deb ball was because you said it was stupid and you wouldn’t be my escort.” You felt a surge of jealousy and anger fill your body. 

“And she’s just a friend? I don’t think it’s normal for you to be tangled up in each other like that with someone that’s just a friend.” You shot at him, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Oh grow up, Y/n.” He rolled his eyes yet again. “I was her last resort and I felt bad. It’s not that big of a deal. And yes just friends. I do the same thing with you don’t I?” His arms flung out wide, in frustration. 

Ouch.

You should’ve saw that one coming. You should’ve known that Conrad only saw you as just a friend. The way he treats you isn’t special. He does it with all his girl friends apparently.

“Well thank you for making that perfectly clear to me.” Your voice cracked as you spoke. 

Conrad’s eyes instantly softened when he realized what he said.

“Hey, that’s not what I meant-” He reached out to grab your hand but you took another step back. 

“I don’t know what’s going on with you Conrad.. but I feel like I don’t even know you anymore.” You shook your head, walking backwards. “I’m sorry you’re going through whatever it is you’re going through. But that doesn’t give you the right to treat people like shit. Especially people that would move mountains for you.” 

Conrad didn’t say anything, just watched you as you walked away. You sighed and turned around, walking towards the house.

This time Conrad didn’t run after you. This time he let you go. This time you didn’t even want him to come after you.

#conrad fisher #conrad fisher fanfiction #conrad fisher fanfic #conrad fisher imagine #chris briney #chris briney fanfiction #chris briney fanfic #conrad fisher smut #the summer I turned pretty #tsitp

[stilldancewithyou]

No cause THEY REALLY MADE BELLY THE CHEATER ALREADY 😩 I assumed she would’ve broken up with Jere before the last scene of s1 but they made her convo with Jere after that last scene according to the new clip… just insane if JH doesn’t use the cheating plot on J in s3 but made belly a cheater that’s just so nasty to treat your female lead like that in favor of the man 🙄

Yeah I don't like ANYTHING about that Jeremiah/Belly clip. Idk if this is a hot take or not but I don't think anybody cheated in season 1. To me, what happened wasn't cheating at all all. Unless I missed something huge, she and Jeremiah were never actually dating. She's actually just being respectful and doing the mature thing by having a conversation with him about her and Conrad now that she knows that's what she wants. She didn't actually owe Jere anything, but the fact that she tried to be mature and explain it Jere and you can feel how bad she feels for hurting him and he acts like THAT? wtf dude. They kissed twice, talked about their feelings for each other and she went to the ball with him but they never said they were being exclusive with each other. I mean seriously, Cam Cameron was so sweet when Belly broke up with him, he just told her she deserved to be happy and they had something closer to an exclusive dating relationship. Also I'm pretty sure the timeline here, from when they kissed in the pool to the deb ball is maybe a week, maybe just a matter of days. Also, yeah, you were 100% the placeholder for Conrad (and you will be again!) because YOU threw yourself in the middle of it instead of letting them be. It's hard to feel bad for Jere because he openly admits like 187976354 times that he knows Belly has always loved Conrad and it's inevitable and he knows Conrad also loves Belly. I mean...Jere what exactly did you think was gonna happen sweetheart? Why are you acting so surprised? She's been in love with this man her whole life and just found out it was never unrequited. She was always going to choose him.

I just do not like the way Jeremiah talked to her in that scene AT ALL. I feel a little bad for him because I know how shitty it must feel to be trying to come to terms with the fact that your mother is probably dying and then the girl you liked wants your brother all in the same day but would he rather have had her not tell him and just ride off into the sunset with Conrad??? Bc that's the vibe I was getting. And then that line about "my mom has cancer!" are you kidding me??? You're really gonna guilt trip her right now? Also Conrad's mom has cancer too so...is Belly also supposed to abandon him? Does he not deserve love and support but Jere does? That line in the trailer where he tells Belly he's mad at her for being there for Conrad but not him and I get it believe me I do but also was she supposed to not be there for Conrad??? I'm confused what his expectations of her are.

I fully believe we are 100% getting the Jeremiah cheating storyline. The books are being followed so closely right now I don't see why they wouldn't be heading towards that. Also all the subtle hints and foreshadowing that has happened so far...the wedding chaos is happening. It has to happen.

#tsitp #tsitp season 2 #the summer i turned pretty #it's not summer without you #conrad fisher #jeremiah fisher #belly conklin #belly x jeremiah #belly x conrad #ask

[ofsweetgrass-andsurvival]

Jeremiah Fisher Headcanon: As Your Ex Who Wants You Back

judging by your (and jere's) standards, the fight was a bad one. you'd turned down too many of his requests to hang out at all the local parties. he'd misunderstood and assumed you didn't want to spend time with him, and you on your part hadn't been able to explain that crowds just made you uncomfortable - then the two of you had begun fighting. frustrated and more than a little stung by his comment that "none of the other girls in cousins had ever had this kind of problem," you'd told him in a fit of pique to go date them instead, then.

his "maybe i will!" had had you reeling back in absolute shock and hurt. you'd fled before he could so much as utter a single word more, refusing to see him after that.

you ignored all his calls and texts begging for a chance to explain, or at the very least apologize – choosing to burrow away in your room, much to the consternation of your friends & family.

eventually, of course, you had to leave your house, whereupon jeremiah tried to catch hold of you several times, but you shook his hand off on every occasion, finally screaming for him to leave you alone, and that you didn't want to speak to him at all. even though it wasn't what you wanted at all - you missed him terribly. but he'd inflamed all your insecurities so badly with what he'd said that you didn't know how to cope. so you'd run away, again.

after that, he didn't try and speak to you, though you often felt his gaze on you at the country club and the beach. and even though it was exactly what you'd told him to do, you couldn't help the bitter stab of disappointment that he'd given up on you so easily.

three or so weeks passed this way, and you weren't handling the separation very well. you had begun eating very little, and sleeping even less, confining yourself to your room even more than you usually did. but your pride wouldn't let you message or ask to see jere of your own accord, even though you clearly knew being without him was making you miserable.

until on the first day of the month right after your disastrous fight, you heard a tentative knock at your door, swinging it open to reveal a very downcast jere on your front porch, timidly asking if he could speak to you.

you were so surprised you let him in without question, awkwardly sitting next to him on the couch, wondering what he could possibly have to say now. he seemed to look as bad as you felt, shadows under his eyes and faint scruff covering his jawline.

he grabbed your hand instantly, deep blue eyes pleading for you to listen. "i don't want to date anyone else," he said without preamble. "i don't, i swear. i only want you – i'm so sorry i said that, i didn't mean it. i didn't mean it, baby, please believe me – "

you can't help squeezing his hand back, hating how pained his eyes are as he searches your face for any sign of understanding. you nod, unable to choke past your tears to say anything just yet – but you want to tell him you do understand, so you just hold his hand tightly

jere, if possible, looks even guiltier as he waits for you to summon up the strength to speak. when you finally do, you softly tell him that you do understand, and that you didn't mean to make him feel like you didn't want to spend time with him, you just didn't like crowds and too much noise.

he barely even lets you finish before he pulls you to him, hugging you so hard you think you can feel his own heart beating in your chest. "i know," he murmurs, pulling his hands through your hair. "i know, sweetheart, you don't need to explain. i'm sorry i made you feel insecure. i'm just so stupid. i –"

you free your other hand to wipe his cheek, hating the wetness you find there. he sniffs, nuzzling into your hand. "please say i haven't messed this up so badly that you won't take me back," he says softly. "please."

"you haven't," you say, smiling faintly. "you and i are – " but he's already lifted you up before you can finish, taking you to your room to press you flush against his chest, lips ghosting over your neck, your forehead – your lips, apologizing without words, which is how he does it best.

you bury your head in his neck, finally feeling safe after what feels like an age. your head is throbbing with the amount you've cried in the past half hour - but it's all worth it. because you finally have jere back. and this time you know you'll never let each other go. ♡

#jeremiah fisher #the summer i turned pretty #tsitp fanfic #jeremiah fisher headcanon #jeremiah fisher x reader #tsitp x reader #tsitp jeremiah #jeremiah fisher x y/n #jeremiah fisher fanfic #tsitp imagine #tsitp x you

[imyouslnot]

Conrad fisher

Insufficient

beginning of summer, everything was going well, you had a perfect life or at least you thought you did. His family was getting along well despite the problems between the uncles after his grandfather's bite,you are in an "almost relationship" with the boy of your dreams and everything was perfect.

But not everything is perfect,With summer arriving automatically comes his biggest nightmare: the Conklin Or rather Isabel Conklin the girl you think is perfect.

Their almost relationship is none other than Conrad, the dream boy. You always knew that Conrad and Belly's bond was always big, VERY big actually, and it scared you.The fear of losing the love of your life scares you, the fear of being exchanged for someone better than yourself, assuring you that there is no one better than you, you always have that insecurity with someone.

Jere was your best friend for a while and that brought you some information that belly is in love with conrad, he was always just like you and you knew you had to be reciprocal even though jeremiah said he only saw her as steve's little sister.

The day before your first kiss with conrad you heard the conklin family was on the way and it made you nervous but never let it show. You were on your way to the fisher house Susannah had asked you to befriend Belly, you wanted to decline but couldn't, she had asked for you right away, not for any other girl for you and how would you say no?

Just around the corner, the beach house was visible, huge, you walked for a few seconds and you could already see a car, probably Susannah's best friend or belly's mother, whatever.

when arriving at the huge house you saw the four, jere, conrad, steve and belly, they looked happy. You made a sound in your throat to get their attention, conrad was looking at you confused, with a strange face actually everyone was.

- What are you doing here? - that were the words of conrad rather rude

- I called her. - Susannah appeared at the door with an infectious smile on her face.

You watched her walk up to you and give you a side hug

- So Belly Steve, this is Y/N.Y/n these are Steve and Belly - She spoke introducing each other.

- Hi - was all you managed to say other than sending them a smile.

Jere pulled his mom a little and you could hear him asking

- Mom? why did you call her - He asked with some trepidation

- I called her to chat with Belly and maybe make friends - Susannah pronounced with a smile - And who knows, you might be friends again, now go there and be polite - She gave him a little push.

- So Y/N, are you from here? - belly started to bring up the subject

- Yes and no, I was born in New York but I've lived here for as long as I can remember.

-

After a while you were in the belly room, helping to unpack, after the boys had thrown it in the pool to cover any ritual between them.

- How long have you known the fisher? - she asked you

- A few years ago, I always heard about them but I hadn't really met them, as time went by I ended up bumping into Jere at a party and since then we've become best friends That was until he stopped talking to me on the networks and asked me out. So we just don't talk anymore

- Wow, I never imagined that from jere, he's so cheerful with everyone and never forgets about anyone unless he's hungover but you never looked for him?

- I sent a few messages but I didn't get back to him, he didn't answer any so he probably didn't want to know - I said honestly - and what's it like being with 3 boys? - she widened her eyes - Not literally staying, I mean what is it like to live with them? - quickly reworked.

- It's normal, there aren't many things, usually I can never go out with them.

We spent the whole afternoon talking, she was nice, very nice, that explains the way conrad looked at her not only he jere him too, she is anyone's dream girl.

It was almost night and I was thinking about going to the "fire party" but I didn't want to go alone, so I called her, at least I have someone to talk to.

"the boys would never let me go" - she said with a sad smile

- and who said they need to leave anything? - I said with a mischievous smile on my lips.

And off you two went, the party. Right when we arrived Steve the super protective brother or at least he tries to be a slight tantrum and I just said I'd take care of her even though she's not a kid anymore.

- why did you bring her - says conrad getting up from where he was with a girl - hey she wanted to come and I didn't want to come alone, so we came together - I replied.

- Just take care of her - he said pleading with his eyes

And that's when I realized I was the intruder, the way Conrad looked at her was beautiful, he really likes her and made that clear. She likes her too it's plastered on her face all the time

She spent the afternoon telling me about him, and the sparkle in her eyes was clear, there was no way to hide it.

They really liked each other and didn't assume, jere had said that he looked at her like a child but apparently it's not like that anymore or maybe it never was.

Conrad was worried, he looked at her all the time, maybe because she is beautiful, and has a beautiful smile and is all perfect. One thing I know I'm not, not like her and I know I won't make him worried,that only belly can do, not even the girl he was with at the beginning of the party can do that.

I was near the water, thinking, when I felt the presence of someone. I knew it was him, I so wanted it to be anyone but him.

- What are you thinking - He asked

There is if he knew everything that's going on in my head right now, everything.

- Belly - I replied with a sigh

- Belly? O que ela? - He questioned looking at me deeply

- She's beautiful, she has a beautiful smile, she's fun and...

- Which is?

- And it's perfect for you conrad.

- What? what do you mean by that?

- I noticed the way you look at each other, your concern for her, I realized that your world is her and that you are happy when you see her, there is always a little smile on your lips when you see her, that's obvious. And I know you don't look at me like that, and you won't worry about me so much. - I stopped, analyzing his eyes upon hearing my words.

- Y/N no no, that's wrong, I'm not in the mood for belly, I don't look at her like you say, I... - he was nervous, he didn't know what words to use.

- Conrad? I just don't want to delude myself ok? yours is her, I know that and I know there's no use denying it.

I kept walking, knowing he was standing still.

- Y/N I love you. - he said in a low voice and you just kept walking knowing it was better to leave him.

#the summer i turned pretty #conrad fisher #jeremiah fisher #belly x conrad #conrad x reader #jeremiah x reader #steve conklin #bellyconrad

[theflyingfeeling]

Hey I thought I'd ask my resident Finn mutual what is Cha Cha Cha about exactly? 😂

basically it's about getting drunk and letting go of all your inhibitions as a result 🤡 It's the usual story of a typical Finnish guy who, sober and in their "weekday persona" would never step on the dance floor, but once they have downed enough alcoholic drinks the world "ain't making them so scared anymore"

but Käärijä (Jere) himself explained on the morning TV the other day that the song is also an anthem for "being yourself" so I guess it can be interpreted in different ways, although the lyrics are quite straight-forward 😅

#not sure how helpful the english captions provided in the music video are as they're not necessarily literal translations 🤔 #i don't really drink myself and i've never been drunk in my life so i don't really have much else to say 😂 #please drink responsibly kids 🖤

[escapismqueen]

You need to understand that the show is based on the books, and therefore the majority of it will follow a similar plot line. And the changes they have made are only pointing to bonrad endgame even more. Whether you “accept” it as canon or not doesn’t mean anything, it is canon. So that’s just you ignoring reality. As for time stamps, you can find them yourself. But I’ll provide scenes for you, when they’re in the arcade talking jere can be seen eavesdropping behind them. When they’re in the country club and Belly tells jere she will go with Conrad and catch up with him, he lingers in the corridor listening. He strops in the car when Conrad gives her his jumper, to the point belly literally says she’s going to put music on to lighten the mood. He goes all moody and woe is me when she chooses the sour patch kids, so she has to say she can eat the Swedish fish too. She’s constantly having to coddle his insecurities, that stem from jealousy and competition. They’re a couple off the top of my head, but if I put a bit of thought into it there would probably be many more.

I’m not ‘ignoring reality’ I’m realising that there could be changes made to the SHOW that didn’t happen In the book, because Jenny said she might make those changes. Sorry for wanting belly to end up with someone who shows her love at every given moment and creates a healthy environment for the relationship to grow in.

He doesn’t ‘strop’ In the car, he even tells her to take the sweater

He never outwardly shows that the ‘sour patch kids’ thing upset him, because he didn’t want her to feel awkward

And ‘coddle his insecurities’ is so ridiculous. If you mean her telling him that she chooses him, and explaining to him that she’s sorry, then that’s exactly what needed to happen. Those things needed to be said because he was rightfully hurt by the summer before. Of course he had insecurities. Belly was doing the right thing by talking them out with him. Just like he does for her. Because. they. communicate.

#tsitp #team jelly #the summer i turned pretty #team jeremiah #anti bonrad

[zalrb]

the summer i turned pretty - 1x01 review because as initium said, i'm in a bad way

This is what happens when you've rewatched all of your shows to DEATH. You need a break.

I'm skipping the beginning of the first episode because I already saw it when it dropped and it made me violent.

So they're at the house now.

At least it's not a Beyonce song.

I do have to laugh at Conrad getting an ENTRANCE because, I mean, he's just a guy.

I didn't go back further enough. "You're growing up, you're in bloom." Oh jesus christ.

This is what I mean they don't talk to each other with any real emotion, they talk to each other like they're just delivering a line. "He didn't come last summer." "Well that's because we just got divorced but we're good now." I get the sense that Laurel is supposed to be not as warm as Susannah, she's supposed to be a little rigid and I guess insensitive/unaware of her children's feelings but even if that was the case, the way that line was delivered wouldn't be delivered that way.

Wow, Jere is WAY more annoying this season. When he's begging her to go into the ocean it's supposed to be charming, but instead he just sounds like a pest.

Oh, shit I didn't pass the country club part yet? Nope, skipping.

"Did you know my dad has a new girlfriend already?" I just feel like if you two were best friends, you would be having this conversation throughout the school year.

"OK OK we get it you've been working out" but that's not the same thing as aiming a phone into a basket.

So I thought Conrad and Steven were supposed to be the best friends? Like, I get that Conrad is sullen now because his mother is dying but if the previous dynamics were Steven + Conrad + Jere then Steven should automatically know something is wrong since Conrad is distant but he's aligned with Jere immediately. Unless I misread that.

Steven is just as annoying.

"Everything OK?" NO SHE WANTS TO GO TO THE BONFIRE LIKE A BIG GIRL WITH THE BOYS.

Cardi B. For a bonfire. OK.

This music. does not. go. AT. ALL. Please for the love of god, stick to Taylor Swift.

"Steven!" "Whaaaaaaaat are you doing here?" is literally the only time I believe them as siblings.

Belly. You called him over because you were uncomfortable. He's taking you away. And now you're SCREAMING? This girl is not a teenager she is just the worst.

This WOULD be a teenage moment if she called Steven over and he got Jumper away and she's like great thanks you can go now and he was like no no no come with me, wear my jacket, you shouldn't be here and she's like quit it. But screaming and then falling down (which I understand is supposed to be a gag) is ridiculous.

Stay home and watch a movie Belly.

This dialogue does not make any sense. "Who are you?" "WHO ARE YOU?" "Nicole. Conrad and I went to the deb ball last summer..." no no Nicole's not explaining herself to Belly, the next question is "Is she your girlfriend?"

"You're such a brat." Hahahahaha she's terrible.

"FUCK YOU" Belly. What the fuck?

Like OK I'm trying to play devil's advocate with myself. She goes to the beach to see Conrad and he's making out with another girl which she sees after falling down because her older brother is trying to get her to go home. This is a summer she's trying to get Conrad to see her differently. So she's embarrassed and she's lashing out. I can understand her frustration and her jealousy getting her to be like "I thought you said all debs were sheep!" but screaming fuck you at Steven is exactly why you're a brat, Belly. STOP OVERREACTING. Because your overreaction is what caused the scene not Steven guiding you away.

I didn't think there'd be a character worse than Jenny in GG but Belly is it.

she looks like she's falling

"You caught me on my way out" you went up to her and introduced yourself as Sextus, Cam.

So are we not going to talk about how Conrad makes out with a Black girl and his ex is dark-skinned and they're both disposable.

Cam and Belly are more tolerable to watch tbh. She almost does the twirly, giddy, omg a boy is giving me attention, nervous excitement naturally. Almost.

My brother is such a dick. Belly. Please. Shut up.

"I just knew it was going to be a bunch of kids getting drunk and I don't drink at all." oooooor "I didn't want to come, it's not really my scene, you know, I don't even drink, so..." that would sound WAY more natural.

LOL Jeremiah loves her so much. Also Jeremiah *sees Belly get elbowed in the face* oh, damn. you good?

"My name's Cam. Cameron." "Your name is Cam Cameron?" Jeremiah, how dumb are you? Really.

"Your hair's like a little kid's, the way it's always so messy." *staring* I'm sorry, this was supposed to be a moment?

OK so it's supposed to be this moment that Belly runs away from Conrad because she's going to do something for herself, she's going to see Cam, she's going to be more active but the implication is also that if Conrad wanted to do something she would always be available to him to do it and she's not doing that this summer so that's a shift in dynamics, which is why it would've been great if we saw her do the same habits at the beginning of the episode and then we saw that turning point at the end of the episode.

Again with Dawson's Creek it starts with Joey and Dawson talking about their friendship and how she thinks they're going to change and he doesn't think they have to and they share a bed together like they were kids because Joey gives into Dawson's arguments. At the end of the episode, Joey refuses to sleep in Dawson's bed, he insists that they're still the same, and she challenges him like OK if we are tell me what time of day you jerk off since we're still just friends and Dawson can't so Joey leaves because things HAVE changed but as she's rowing back across the street, he yells out the answer, signifying that they've changed but they're also still Dawson and Joey.