#ive been meaning to compile all this stuff into one for years now so here you go this is my gordon hes a mess | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

peacheenie · 4 years

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hl1/2 gordon scentric hc time

im rly feeling half life in this chillis tonight so....some....hc’s about everyones favourite free man, i have a lot so enjoy

-he’s actually mute and uses sign language but only about 50% of the time cuz people either don’t know what he’s saying or he can’t do it whilst holding like 20 different guns/weapons to protect himself so instead he makes big gestures a lot or writes down what hes trying to say (pretty much everyone at black mesa could understand him via sign language so he was very comfortable using it, during hl2 however he has to keep reminding himself not everyone is fluent and it frustrates him to no end)

-when he tries to speak it hurts and the most sound he can make is mumbles or little sqeaks so if theres ever a time he needs to alert someone to dangers reeeal quick he ends up hurting his throat a lot to try and make some kind of warning noise thats loud enough, he can hum tho and enjoys humming along to music as well as when he’s signing to try and convey some kind of emotion along with his facial features of which he emotes a LOT

-his hand writing looks like that of an actual dotors and its neat cursive but very hard to read so if he’s trying to write as a form of communication he just defaults to caps with big spaces inbetween and people (barney) tease him about it constantly (barney)

- hes incredibly short sighted without his glasses and ends up squinting a lot without them on and since he’s usualy default bitch facing he just looks very angry all the time when really he just cant see anything please dont be offended sir he didnt mean to upset you

-is actually very scared all the time abt like everything, hes literally just a scientist who just happened to be “the right man in the wrong place” and was just so determined to try and save those around him during the cascade that he pushed thorough his fears and anxiety to try and get the job done but he def has some form of ptsd after it all, barnicles specifically really freak him out because getting strangled and slowly lifted off of the ground into a row of razor sharp teeth is fucking TERRIFYING and he wouldnt wish it on anyone

-only reason he knows how to use guns is because barney would regularly take him down to the shooting range during their breaks and they’d see who could shoot straightest after a few drinks, barney would always win.

-after hl1 when he was put into stasis and he wakes up in hl2 hes lost like 20 years of his life and hates that fact terribly, all his friends have aged around him but hes still in his 20′s when he shouldnt be and he hates it so fucking much

-he also finds himself missing the feeling of the HEV suit terribly during the begining of his re-awakening in city 17, he’d grown so used to the feeling of it on him and keeping him safe that it makes him anxious without it and the cold air on his hands is also uncomfortable so he prefers wearing gloves all the time, when he finally gets the HEV suit back it feels like a weight has been lifted and he can finally stop worrying, the suits voice is also a comforting sound beccause its familiar and a sign that he’s not alone, same goes with the healing station and suit charging noises; they’re a comforting sound to hear and he enjoys humming along to the vrwwwrrrr vrrwwrrr vrwrrrrwr the machine makes when he plugs into the port

-he worries about overdosing on the healing stations a lot though; the morphone they give out is indefinite and once during the casade he’d passed out from taking to much and woken up to a zombie very slowly approaching him from down a corridoor but with how drowzy he was it was it was a horrible struggle to lift the gun and fire between dozing in and out

-he gets attached to people quickly since also during the cascade days he’d regularly meet people in danger who only had him to keep them safe so he tries his absolute hardest to make sure he can protect people even if that means he gets shot in the process, the suit usually protects him/heals him anyway so he’s used to it and if theres danger he almost default/automatically moves infront of people to make sure they’re okay without any concern for his own safety

-he also reeeally likes antlions and will pet them any chance he gets, he tried to do it when he first saw them and almost lost a hand so it makes him upset he has to kill them but when he finally gets the bug bite from the vorts? ohhhhohohoh he pets so many antlions, it again makes him sad he has to use them as like fodder for turrets and stuff but if an antlion comes back to him after taking down a turret or killing a combine he gives them extra pets and becomes a very proud papa

-since hes technically in his 30′s (and would be nearing his 40′s had he not been in stasis) he feels more of a big brother/fatherly bond toward Alyx since he’d also met her as a baby and finds any romantic involvement with her awkward, (so Elli’s comment on him “wanting grandkids” he ends up slapping the man on the arm with a frown to which Eli just laughs) this doesn’t help his attachment issue though so when they have to seperate to do things away from the other he worries for her safety even though she constantly assures him she can take care of herself and he KNOWS she can. he still really can’t help but worry though...

after hl2 ep2:

-when eli dies i dont like to think they all straight away go to mossman and instead get to spend some time mourning at the base, this gives gordon some time to finally sit down and relax for a little bit but he finds it incredibly hard to even take off the HEV suit at first because to him there was no passage of time between being put into stasis and waking up in city 17 all those years later; he’d closed his eyes, went into the portal and then the next second awakened in a completely unfamiliar place, in unfamiliar clothes with unfamiliar people (he definitely had a panic attack before geting off that very first train) and the thought of that happening again when he’s not prepared is terrifying.

-when he does finally take off the suit (after a lot of helping and reasuring from alyx, kleiner and barney a LOT from barney; theyre very good friends (;) he takes to wearing very comfy and heavy clothes such as jumpers, ponchos etc as well as a bullet proof vest because it makes him feel safe, the HEV suit gloves he retires entirely cuz theyre gross, definitely covered in his own blood and have been through hell so instead he has a bunch of different pairs he cycles through depending on how he feels that people around the base give him after learning about his fondness towards them

-he secretly carries a gun around with him even when they’re not in any danger becaus it’s another added layer of security and becaus he literally can’t trust things to not go bad EVER; now though nothing will go wrong again on his watch because he’ll be ready for it!! this really doesn’t help with his nerves though since he’s constantly looking for something to go wrong

scene specific hc’s:

-i always think abt that one specific sene in the train that gets derailed where alyx is trapped by a stalker and gordon has to pull it away with his gravity gun and i always imagine him franticly pulling it away with so much alarm on his face and such panic, when shes free though and has to stop to catch her breath gordon would give her a hug and make sure she’s okay cuz it must have been terrifying to have that thing screaming inches from ur face, gordon just instantly goes into protect mode

-another scene that always comes to mind is when you first encounter an advisor and it makes that horrid loud noise where alyx is holding her head; i imagine gordon almost dropping the gravity gun in a panic to try and cover his ears because he doesn’t handle loud noises too well and it freaks him out so much alyx has to help him get out of the room since he kind of locks up on hearing it

-same goes when you get trapped by an advisor in a barn and almost become food for it; gordon is absolutely terrified at getting so up and close without being able to move that when it finally does drop him he starts hyperventilating and alyx has to protect him from the oncoming combine for a little while before he can catch his breath

-last scenes but some of my favorites are the ENTIRE sections of gordon being up close with breen,

first being the teleporter malfunctioning and when gordons heavy breathing i imagine hes trying super hard not to start freaking out/hyperventilating and when breens doing his “i want that twink obliterated” spiel and then looks up and says his name, gordon almost looses it and internally is like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

second is when youre trapped in that like...metal contraption thing the stalkers are carried in and brought to breens officce and that entire section where breen is talking directly TO YOU i just adore it becausee gordon would have been looking away awkwardly unable to actually respond and furrowing his eyebrows at the nerve breen has upon thinking you would ever agree to any such terms and would definitely also spit in breens face as a response just like alyx did since he can’t use words

okay that is all, if you read all of these you’re amazing and i love u and also gordon hes an amazing “character” because i can insert as many of my own quirks into him as i please because valve literally never gave him a personallity :^)

#half life #half life 2 #gordon freeman #headcanon #long post #text post #headcanons #ive been meaning to compile all this stuff into one for years now so here you go this is my gordon hes a mess

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lesbeet · 2 years

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sorry to ask a big question like this unprompted and of course please don't feel a need to answer this, but i'm having difficulties right now as a college student who managed to never really practice composing formal writing in high school and my first 2 years of college now having to take writing intensive courses. i feel like theres a lot of shifting between different modes in a bit of an intuitive way needed to write effectively, and i'm sure with practice i could get a better sense for that, but in general ive never been good at organizing my thoughts and have a lot of trouble with executive function issues/adhd stuff that make it so that when people try to break things down like ‘just write an outline before you write to structure your thoughts!’ as a simple first step it feels like theres so many unnamed steps i’m supposed to figure out before i can even get to that point. i get the feeling there might just not be easy answers applicable across different people beyond the normal steps people recommend for essay writing and i just have to continue trying to figure it out even if it feels pretty fruitless right now, but i just wanted to ask since i know you’ve talked about both being an english teacher and having adhd (while ofc that doesnt mean youve had that issue, i at least feel it might be easier than how ive tried to articulate my issues with people knowledgeable about writing in my life who dont have adhd or anything) i was wondering if you maybe had any advice about how i could approach this or break things down further or anything? thank you so much even if you just read this and don't respond, my apologies for sending all this!

i'm actually going to approach answering this from more of an english teacher perspective than from an adhd-er perspective, bc i find that a lot of my students without adhd also struggle with organizing their thoughts and putting them into words to a degree that necessitates further direction beyond just "go write an outline"

i can't really give you any specifics without knowing the style of writing or the goal of the piece, but 9 times out of 10 you'll be pretty well served by either:

1. compiling evidence until a pattern emerges, which will help you figure out your overall angle, thesis, claim—whatever you call it, it's the central idea that your writing piece is pointing to. then you can figure out the best way to present your evidence in support of your central idea

or,

2. if you already know what point you want to make, then it's just a matter of figuring out the best way to do it. is there specific evidence that you can use to support it? is there a particular train of logic that you could delineate to help your reader reach the conclusion you're trying to present? sometimes trial and error is best here, or even setting a timer for 5 minutes and typing stream-of-consciousness-style nonstop about the topic to see if any repeated ideas emerge. again, looking for patterns helps here, and adhd-ers are often particularly adept at pattern recognition! once you've found the patterns that will help you make your point, it's honestly not the worst idea to just rearrange them in your head until it feels like it makes sense. most poorly organized writing i read is only poorly organized because the writer put down the ideas in the order they came up with them and didn't try to rearrange them into something more effective. if you try putting things in different spots, you'll start to get a feel for what makes sense, which ideas logically lead into one another, etc.

for writing fiction, honestly the same options can work for brainstorming or outlining, but instead of a thesis, it's a theme, and instead of evidence and a path of logic, it's characters and a plot.

ik this is super vague but i hope it was helpful! if you want more specific advice, feel free to reach out over chat! thank you for being patient i meant to answer this yesterday kdsjflksjd <3

#answered #anonymous

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thevibrationofatoms · 3 years

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Hi I keep getting new followers here now so uh I guess here's a quick like...rundown of what My Deal is.

The Solid Facts: I'm a 32 year old white and cis ace/biromantic married lady. Very ADHD, also very much an introverted scientist sort of nerd. This is the side blog of my main blog @linddzz

So like....what's the DEAL:

Fuck dude idk. Ive spent a good chunk of adult life being an ex-Catholic agnostic who dabbled in various paths of nature veneration type paganism. This blog was made years ago as a way for me to compile resources and ideas as I tried to find something I Vibe With. Spent a lot of time finding things just didn't seem to Feel Right, kept looking into various members of various pantheons (mostly Hellenic and Nordic) and also read a lot into reconstructive Druidism, found a lot of things that almost fit but never really felt anything from it. The more recent years I've shrugged and settled into a more secular general atheist nature veneration where I just like....kept in touch with seasonal cycles and gardened and brewed and read up on the local environment and it's history. Have been in a funk state for years of "well I sure would LIKE to Believe In Something but nothing seems to grab me."

Then I got called to Dionysus and by "called to" I mean that after years of him going "pspspsps" at me I turned around and went "WHAT????" I then panicked realizing that oh, this is what a call from the divine is like and I guess I'm not an atheist anymore.

I already had a like...vague knowledge that Dionysus is more than "WOOO PARTY" and that he had a lot of death/rebirth and wild nature vibes going on, but nothing concrete. Since a very concrete aspect has decked me out in ivy garlands slightly against my will I've been reading more scholarly stuff on him and keep needing to go sit down because everything I read has been like.....very very much matching up to the Vibes I get from the Dionysus in my head. A lot. They match a lot. I'm....hm.

So You're a Hellenistic Pagan then?

Hnnggg kinda??? I guess??? Idk man no one but Dionysus has tapped me and no one else waved back when I tried reaching out and reading on other dieties. I've been saying I'm Dionysian because he's the only one who grabbed me. Tbh the only other diety I even ALMOST felt something from was Odin and the most I got from there was a vague sense of "nah not quite there kid"

I honestly am so new to this shit that it's been days. I got hit in the third eye and have been reeling around a bit

So what's the Dionysus Aspect you're on about?

The image that pops to mind is a lithe androgynous young (or old, or middle aged) dude draped in leapoard skins and old vines and bones, golden snake-eyed and horned, almost entirely hidden in shadows of foliage, feeling like something alluring and dangerous and ancient, fully man and god and animal.

Also wearing shutter shades and drinking wine from his kylix using a silly straw and grinning.

You described yourself as an asexual introvert nerd which....doesn't sound very Dionysian

Oh I Know and I did point this out to him but all I get is that fucking dangerously happy fanged smug ass grin

You don't sound very Respectful of your new god

I live in comfort that if he expected breathless respect and nothing but sweet veneration he wouldn't have slung an arm around me. I had no say in this so he gets what he gets damnit

If anything I feel like he's just entertained. Like one would be at a grouchy but harmless cat.

This is all a very recent development and if you want more stuff on how i relate to him and what the general Real Big Neon Signs were that he was tapping me, scroll on down. I'm also down to chat I guess but again, this is a whole new damn world for me

#the dionysian spiral #dionysian #dionysus #dionysos #idk dude im just here and now so is Dionysus

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ariyadaivaris · 3 years

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- oh god vic please come back. where have you gone. we miss you

- NEW GEAR! NEW GEAR FOR TONY the track jacket is obviously new (its very cute i like the rolled up sleeves+tape up to wrists look a lot) and his new goofy lil emblem on his kneepads. also its the same candy red as ariya's. unbearable! i can't stand them. good for him

- "a red wedding of sorts, if you will" HUH? YOU CAN'T SAY THAT. WHY DID HE SAY THAT

- ARIYA DID THE SLASH ACROSS THE THROAT THING!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT FEELS LIKE LIFETIMES SINCE HE'S DONE IT i love him. terrible. awful. scary <3

- the windup on ariya's elbow drops <3 he is a delight to watch...

- god i wish wish WISH 205 had some fucking storylines again!!!!!!!!!! i love tony and ariya and i love the bollywood boys, you know this, but if i have to watch another mostly directionless tag match that won't go anywhere or lead to anything because the cw division's plot-important stuff is relegated to nxt with an entirely different group of people and none of these guys are considered in high enough regard to reap the rewards of a division they built and carried on their backs for the last 5 years with NO fucking help or faith in them at all i'm going to go off the deep end. i would take an in-ring promo at this point. anything at fucking all - commentary keeps pushing the "they're working harder than ever to get a title shot" thing and it's just so. i'm insanely depressed about it. does ANYONE genuinely believe, watching this, that they will ever be given a title shot? do the four men in this ring right now have any hope that they will ever see that title on their show again, never mind get a chance at it? - ariya really isn't ever gonna be a champion is he. the division gets some steam and he's never going to be a part of it. i'm so mad all the time. lol

- its...a struggle to watch 205 recently. it is a struggle to do fucking anything recently but this especially is hard because 205 is like. My Thing. that is the one thing that i am in it for, this is the one thing i have to look forward to on a weekly basis, to mark the passage of time for myself. and i just can't keep doing this! watching alone, having to sustain interest on my own, ignoring the parts of the division that have things going on because its dudes ive never seen on 205 and have no interest in and because its a lot of miserable shitheels and predators that dubya considers relevant for reasons i will never understand (their loyalties have always been clear but given how little anyone cares about like, devlin, who has never done anything in dubya at all even if you ignore That, its like what tradeoff could possibly be worth this unless you want to just signal that you will protect abusers which EVERYONE KNOWS ALREADY), watching and desperately finding scraps of character development in reruns of the same three match configurations over and over and over again involving more dudes that you don't really care about even after all this time because they joined post-plot-or-character and its all with no build, no leadup, no EXCITEMENT, while everyone has already kind of moved on from it for reasons that seem better and better all the time. i don't want to let go of it or stop hoping because i WANT to see if anything happens, i care about ariya and tony's weird fuckin story arcs that much if anything and honestly i think letting go of it at this exact point in time is admitting a loss that i could not withstand at the present moment, but its so...i have to force myself to watch it at this point. and i know it all sounds sooooo pathetic because it is, but i'm just. im so tired!!!!!!!! im so fucking tired of it all

- OHHH SAMIR'S SAVE INTO THE NECKBREAKER OWNS

- ITS FUCKIN SUNIL TIME BABEY!!!!!!!!!! SUNIL SINGH EPIC MOMENTS COMPILATION!!!! GOLD STANDARD DOESNT STAND A CHANCE LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOO

- ariya tagging tony in and just kind of collapsing and rolling through the ropes to have a little lie-down on the apron. sunil singh unstoppable, undefeatable, cannot be survived

- ARIYA KNOCKED HIMSELF OUT ON THE POST. ARIYA

- TONY TWO KNEES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- TONY GET CLEAN PIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARIYA WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- oh my guy ariya's not lookin too good lol

- he’s fine <3 (he IS okay if you are worried)

- oh now lorcan cares about the cruiserweight division again huh! interesting ^_^

- legado del fantasma should be allowed to do that. i think its okay

- i don't really care about him besides going huh, fun aesthetic i guess, but i like grey's entrance music a LOT. maybe it's just the vocals making it distinguishable from whatever new team is doing the themes and making them all the same boring generic hinting-at-metal pop punk instrumental shit. oh well

- commentary making suuuuuuuch a big deal over grey doing things The Right Way to beat mansoor and IF I DO RECALL CORRECTLY tony as well and ignoring that he cheated to beat ariya. ariya gets cheated out of the recognition he's earned once again i see...pretty sure grey wasn't doing it The Right Way when he put his feet on the ropes against the BACKBONE, the BLOOD, the SPINE of the cruiserweight division but whatever............

- you know what i miss? high flying. that thing that 205 was originally about showcasing in a lot of ways? where did that go (to the corner to sit through timeout for being too good apparently) god i miss lhp i miss cedric i miss babyface moose i miss angel and humberto and AKIRA!!!!...i even miss buddy...wails and gnashes my teeth. i miss alicia and kenta and lio and the kanellises though i am glad they are out of dubya. some of these people aren't high flyers which was the original point whatever i still miss them. i need to rewatch 205 so i can try to have fun and not freak out over just how much of it i have to skip over

- he is so handsome <///3

- ariya is both very VERY interested in august cheating to beat him and furious that he's not cheating to beat anyone else. why WOULD he do that? he didn't care about it when he had to beat ariya. ariya's not the ONLY heel in the division, and not the only person who would cheat to win. august can position himself as righteous--he's doing things HIS way, after all--and noble, but ariya knows better. august is losing by doing this, too! he's not WINNING! he cares more about his principles than about the win, which is CERTAINLY news to ariya. turnabout is fair play against him, apparently, because It's Daivari and anyone can do anything to him and get off scot-free. ariya watches grey refuse to cheat against anyone else, and he listens and he is commended as a hero for it, and it is driving him up the wall to watch. of course, ariya getting humiliated and treated like shit by people who then get lauded as clean babyfaces who continue thinking of him as a dirty cheater beneath them as they do the same things is uh. he’s encountered it before

- "YOU blew it! you let your pride get in the way! YOU blew it! don't ever forget that!" HM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- this is so fucking juicy. ariya ranks winning through any means above his pride! ariya would rather win dirty than lose clean. he's disgusted that grey won't use his brain to see that a win is better than a loss. ALSO! ariya going "you let your pride get in the way" is SO interesting! self righteousness as arrogance in his eyes feels very illuminating. NO he's not exactly PROUD of the shit he's done but it's the smart thing to do. he's survived, hasn't he? how many other cruiserweights could say that? did mustafa survive? did cedric? did akira? did their principles help them survive? did akira having his arm ripped off just to outlast ariya The Right Way do anything to help him in the long run? what good is doing things the right way when it is so so so fucking hard not to die in here already? on the other hand, ariya is also kind of proud at times! ariya's pride being wounded is what led to the huge character shift he went through to begin with. his pride got in the way of joining drew and tony on the same level and it got in the way of fixing things properly between him and tony until they had to grow back together, and when i say grow i mean it in the sense of...like...a tree. slow and deliberate and taking fucking forever. and it's still never been addressed out loud, really. when ariya says grey's pride got in the way of somethig, he has some idea of what he's talking about ugh. UGH!!!!!!!!! this is all so fascinating. ariya daivari top five characters of all time

#205 lb #meta tag #VERY fun episode for ariya this week. i DID have a good time please ignore the breakdown in the middle

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savnofilter · 4 years

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answering all anonymous asks

i have a lot of mixed opinions and stuff so i just compiled them into one post. the public ones i will be posting separately, simply because i feel they are different. all responses are under the cut!

tw: mentions of pedophilia and gore.

i am and thank you!! i havent really eaten since tuesday but ive trying to keep my fluids up. i hope you are doing okay as well, anon!

~ i learned about puberty when i was 6 only because my sisters had already learnt it (ages 8). the educational sites used were always catered to helping the youth learn about periods, puberty, and everything that comes along with it. once i was at age 8, i also had access to the sites as well.

~ the idea of sex was brought around to me around 8. at 9 i had an experience but i will not get into it since it’s still slightly traumatic for me. other than having a negative experience with it, i yet again already had an understanding because of my older sister’s and i’s class experiences to have a grasp of it.

i would also like to add that my parent were never prudes. bringing up this point, disclaimer that they havent done anything weird to me or my sister. once i was 11 (in 6th grade), i was learning about sex and reproduction. my mother has always told me if i had any questions about that type of stuff, that i should never be afraid to ask.

if she felt anything was too explicit she would tell me that i didnt have to learn about that right now and that when i am older she would be receptive responding. i honestly think the hate stems from the fact that they dont get dicked down well enough from their own bfs that they have to write the pent up frustration on minor characters.

i mean with the cult running around, yes it is. if you are not in a close circle or have an established following, you will have a much harder time getting your stuff out there. its not impossible but it is much definitely more difficult to start up.

if you need help with getting your work out there i am more than welcome in trying to help you out tho!

THANK. YOU. someone had to fucking say it, couldnt be me since they refuse to listen to me. do you know how predatory in itself trying to control what minors of the same age doing together???? the only time i can see minors getting “arrested” unless it was public indecency. also why are you an adult knowing about 14 y.os getting arrested for sexual intercourse? 🤡

it definitely is safe. the people most active are teenagers so do not feel afraid. if there are any concerns please come to me since i am the original and head of the server.

!!! exactly. her sorry ass callout post about my age and followers LOL. “sorry i have more notes than you” i- i had to laugh. i think its so funny because if this was about followers i wouldve done this earlier, not when i hit 5,000 followers.

^ this. all it took was a gabby hannah callout post about my age cnckjsvd couldnt be me. these people preach about keeping kids safe, the kids of the fandom speak up about an abuse and toxicity problem and suddenly we’re ruining the fandom? pick one or the other pls. 🤡

i just honestly find it concerning that theyre thirsting over a character thats um.... HALF YOUR AGE. fake or not its weird asf. its really not your place to say people shouldnt be uncomfortable because you write them “aged 18+” and the most you age them up to is 18 and still write them in U.A. i dont really understand why its such a hard concept to understand.

i just think its concerning that the same people who think i have no sexual awareness have no problem writing characters my age and the only version that theyre aged up is in their fics.

theres something wrong in this equation here.... 😗

lmao these adults have no problem giving people trauma. and yes, yes, and yes. we arent saying that there is a problem aging them up, its how you do it. its really the fact that theyre aging them up and having them at the dorms and aizawa is still somehow, their homeroom teacher? please make it make sense.

if youre especially going to age up someone and youre about 22+, your excuse is that, “their fake so it shouldnt be a problem” is predatory in all the wrong kind of ways.

^ they hate to see it. but once again they did make this an age thing,,, obviously they only learned about sex when they hit 18, and i have hacked the system and infiltrated adult territory. 🤡

right. people are like 16 y.os cant have sex -- no its in place so adults like you dont think you can fuck them any younger. thats all i have to say. but no, im fifteen, i dont have a brain or any sense of the world. no h*rny card for me.

💀 imagine being old enough to understand that stuff can be triggering and no human should even be saying that... getting those shane dawson gore fantasies here.

“no one is mad at you for writing smut. adults are mad because youre writing smut”

your adults arent mentally sound and this is why im making this post. ❤️

lmao i am okay!! ive been having phantom nerve pain where my knuckles are because of that ask though and i had a gore dream. : ) i spoke clearly and properly, when i took them as a joke (yknow being the clowns that they are), they got mad! 1/10, would not recommend a conversation! apparently shes more mature about me but her last post was about riding a teenager’s forehead cnjk vdfd COULD NOT BE ME. she choose to ignore all the other claims and it shows~ 🍵

i dont really mind, ive been wanting to talk about my age on this blog for a really long time since last but sometimes things come sooner than later. even if you dont support my work, i still thank you for supporting me as a person!

RIGHT?! im just really concerned that there are adults who understand that there are moral issues here and some dont. this is why im making a post on a select few and not the whole adult community. thank you for coming to my TED talk.

LMFAO but they dont see it?! 😂 i think me writing about characters my own age is much better than someone who has 10+ years, or better yet, MORE THAN HALF THEIR AGE writing about them. you had your hormones suppressed, doesnt mean mine should as well. 💓

personally, if i was an adult and i made a callout post on someone’s age, i would put a disclaimer to not bully the minors in question,,, just putting out there. your mature and respectful queen is doing magic. 🥰

^ and let me make it clear, after the point of time i realized that following was 18+ blogs was bad, i stopped following them. and even now im sifting through and unfollowing all of them. yes, i do have a brain at fifteen and can think. i know its a foreign concept for some people. 😳

no no no, its okay! i lied about being an adult so this all my fault. :D just think its concerning someone so easily can say one thing and everyone can follow. real cult behaviour and shes the leader. been thinking about making a mean girls poster and sticking her pfp on regina, but even regina had redemption and realized she had work to do. : )

lmao these people have said, “i started reading/writing smut when i was 11-13 but i realized how wrong it was and stopped” so how does it differ from me? you dont magically get good at 18. dont be a hypocrite.

even adults themselves are afraid to speak up. all it took was a shitty post for them to ignore the whole story. these people ignore all the abuse, therapy, toxicity, pedophilia (umbrella term) and everything else that she and her friends are being brought to light about. it shows how much of a blind eye that people have.

this is not a tati situation, i will not go back on my words.

this is understandable. this is even past the age, and this me repeating myself once again. i wasnt even the one who said i was groomed i- its people who were in your, space. think about that.

it really is. and what makes it more concerning that the same people who preach this will talk about how they want to, “beat us the fuck up” or rip our fingers for showing out concern for the vagueness of aged up in fics sometimes.

i even stated that its not everyone who does this but no one will listen.

#tw gore #tw grooming #sav talks

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alanlicht · 4 years

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Alan Licht’s Minimal Top Ten List #4

A few weeks ago, near the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic, my friend Mats Gustafsson sent out a mass email encouraging people to send him record lists to post on the “Discaholics” section of his website--top tens, favorite covers, anything. I immediately thought of the first 3 Minimal Top Ten lists I did (now found online here) back in 1995, 1997, and 2007 respectively, for the fanzine Halana (the first two) and Volcanic Tongue’s website (the third), and sent them to him. Those articles have sort of taken on a life of their own, and I still see them referenced as the albums get reissued and so on. Occasionally people ask me if I’d ever do another one, and looking at all three again made me think now is the hour. I started writing this in the midst of the lockdown, and the drastic reductions in people’s way of life—the restriction of any activity outside the home to the bare essentials, the relative stasis of life in quarantine, even the visual stasis of a Zoom meeting—make revisiting Minimal music, with its aesthetic of working within limitations and hallmarks of repetition and drones, somehow timely as well.

The original lists were never meant to represent “the best” Minimal albums: they were ones that were rare and in some cases surpass, in my opinion, more widely available releases by the same artist and/or better known examples of the genre. Some were records that hadn’t been classified as Minimalist but warranted consideration through that lens. Likewise, the lists aren’t meant to be ranked within themselves, or in comparison to each other; the first record on any of the lists isn’t necessarily vastly preferable to the last, and this fourth list is not the bottom of the barrel, by any stretch. In some cases the present list has records I’ve discovered since 2007; others are records I’ve known for quite a while but haven’t included before for one reason or another. I’ve also made an addendum to selected entries on the first three lists, which have become fairly dated in terms of what is currently available by many of the artists, and to account for some of the significant archival releases in the 25 years since I first compiled them.

Unlike the mid-90s, most if not all of these records can be heard and/or purchased online, whether they’re up on YouTube or available for sale on Discogs. So finding them will be easier than before (although I haven’t included links to any of the titles as a small tribute to the legwork involved in tracking records down in olden tymes), but hopefully the spirit of sharing knowledge and passions that drove my previous efforts, forged in the pre-internet fanzine world, hasn’t been rendered totally redundant by the 24/7 onslaught of virtual note-comparing in social media.

1. Simeon ten Holt Canto Ostinato (various recordings): This was the most significant discovery for me in the last decade, a piece with over one hundred modules to be played on any instrument but mostly realized over the years with two to four pianos. I first encountered a YouTube live video of four pianists tackling it over the course of 90 minutes or so, then bought a double CD on Brilliant Classics from 2005, also for four pianos, that runs about 2 and half hours. The original 3LP recording on Donemus, from 1984, lasts close to 3 hours. It’s addictively listenable, very hypnotic in that pulsed, Steve Reich “Piano Phase”/”Six Pianos” kind of way, with lots of recurring themes (which differentiates it from Terry Riley’s “In C,” its most obvious structural antecedent). Composed over the span of the 70s, as with Roberto Cacciapaglia’s Sei Note in Logica, it’s an example of someone contemporaneously taking the ball from Reich or Riley and running with it. Every recording I’ve heard has been enjoyable, I’ve yet to pick a favorite.

2. David Borden Music for Amplified Keyboard Instruments (Red Music, 1981) 3. Mother Mallard’s Portable Masterpiece Co. Like a Duck to Water (Earthquack, 1976): These were some of my most cherished Minimal recordings when I was a teenager in the mid-80s, and are still not particularly well-known; they’re probably the biggest omission in the previous lists (at least from my perspective). Borden formed Mother Mallard, supposedly the first all-synthesizer ensemble, as a trio in the late 60s, although there’s electric piano on the records too. He went on to do music under his own name that hinged on the multi-keyboard Minimalism-meets-Renaissance classical concept he first explored with Mother Mallard, as exemplified by his 12-part series “The Continuing Story of Counterpoint” (a title inspired by both Philip Glass’ “Music in Twelve Parts” and the Beatles’ “The Continuing Story of Bungalow Bill”). I first heard Parts 6 & 9 of “Continuing Story” (from Music for Amplified Keyboard Instruments) on Tim Page’s 1980s afternoon radio show on WNYC, and bought the Mother Mallard LPs (Like A Duck is the second, the first is self-titled) from New Music Distribution Service soon after. I mail-ordered the Borden album from Wayside Music, which had cut-out copies, maybe a year later (c. 1986). I wasn’t much of a synth guy, but I loved the propulsive, rapid-fire counterpoint and fast-changing, lyrical melodies found on these records. “C-A-G-E Part 2,” which occupies side 2 of the Mother Mallard album and utilizes only those pitches, has to be a pinnacle of the Minimal genre. Interestingly, Borden claims to not really be able to “hear” harmony and composes each part of these (generally) three-part inventions individually, all the way through. The two-piano “Continuing Story of Counterpoint Part Two” on the 1985 album Anatidae is also beloved by me, and there was an archival Mother Mallard CD called Music by David Borden (Arbiter, 2003) that’s worth hearing.

4. Charles Curtis/Charles Curtis Trio: Ultra White Violet Light/Sleep (Beau Rivage, 1997): Full disclosure: Charles is a long-time friend, but this record seems forgotten and deserves another look, especially in light of the long-overdue 3CD survey of his performances of other composers’ material that Saltern released last year. This was a double album of four side-long tracks, conceived with the intent that two sides could be played simultaneously, in several different configurations; two of them are Charles solo on cello and sine tones, the others are with a trio and have spoken vocals and rock instrumentation, with cello and the sine tones also thrown into the mix. (I’ve never heard any of the sides combined, although now it would probably be easily achieved with digital mixing software.) The instrumental stuff is the closest you can come to hearing Charles’ beautiful arrangement of Terry Jennings’ legendary “Piece for Cello and Saxophone,” at least until his own recording of it sees the light of day; the same deeply felt cello playing against a sine tone drone. And it would be interesting to see what Slint fans thought of the trio material. Originally packaged in a nifty all-white uni-pak sleeve with a photo print pasted into the gatefold, it was reissued with a different cover on the now-defunct Squealer label on LP and CD but has disappeared since then. Stellar.

5. Arthur Russell Instrumentals 1974 Vol. 2 (Another Side/Crepuscule, 1984) 6. Peter Zummo Zummo with an X (Loris, 1985): Arthur Russell has posthumously developed a somewhat surprising indie rock audience, mostly for his unique songs and singing as well as his outré disco tracks. But he was also a modern classical composer, with serious Minimal cred—he’s on Jon Gibson’s Songs & Melodies 1973-1977 (see addendum), and played with Henry Flynt and Christer Hennix at one point; his indelible album of vocal and cello sparseness, World of Echo, was partially recorded at Phill Niblock’s loft and of course his Tower of Meaning LP was released on Glass’s Chatham Square label. He’s the one guy in the 70s and 80s (or after, for that matter) who connected the dots between Ali Akbar Khan, the Modern Lovers, Minimalism, and disco as different forms of trance music (taken together, both sides of his disco 12” “In the Light of the Miracle,” which total nearly a half-hour, could arguably be considered one of his Minimalist compositions). Recorded in 1977 & 1978, Instrumentals is an important signpost of the incipient Pop Minimalism impulse, and the first track is a pre-punk precursor to Rhys Chatham and Glenn Branca’s appropriations of the rock band format to pursue Minimal pathways (Chatham is one of the performers in that first piece). The rest, culled from a concert at the Kitchen, features long held tones from horns and strings and is quite graceful, if slightly undercut by Arthur’s own slightly jarring, apparently random edits. [Audika’s 2006 reissue, as part of the double CD First Thought Best Thought, includes a 1975 concert that was slated to be Instrumentals Vol. 1, which shows an even more specific pop/rock/Minimal intersection]. Zummo was a long-term collaborator of Russell’s and his album, which Arthur plays on, is a must for Russell aficionados. The first side is made up of short, plain pieces that repeat various simple intervals and are fairly hard-core Minimalism, but “Song IV,” which occupies all of side two, is like an extended, jammy take on Russell’s disco 12” “Treehouse” and has Bill Ruyle on bongos, who also played on Instrumentals as well as with Steve Reich and Jon Gibson. A recently unearthed concert at Roulette from 1985 is a further, and especially intriguing, example of Russell’s blending of Minimalism and song form. (That same year Arthur played on Elodie Lauten’s The Death of Don Juan--another record I first encountered via Tim Page’s radio show--which I included on Top Ten #3; Lauten as well as Zummo played on the Russell Roulette concert, as their website alleges).

7. Horacio Vaggione La Maquina de Cantar (Cramps, 1978): Another one-off from the late 70s, and yet more evidence of how Minimalism had really caught on as a trend among European composers of the time. Vaggione had a previous duo album with Eduardo Polonio under the name It called Viaje that was noisier electronics, and he went on to do computer music that was likewise more traditionally abstract. But on this sole effort for the Italian label Cramps, as part of their legendary Nova Musicha series, he went for full-on tonality. The title track is like the synth part of “Who Are You” extended for more than fifteen minutes and made a bit squishier; but side 2, “Ending”--already mentioned in the entry on David Rosenboom’s Brainwave Music in Top Ten #3--is my favorite. Kind of a bridge between Minimalism and prog, and a little reminiscent of David Borden’s multiple-synth counterpoint pieces, for the first ten minutes he lingers on one vaguely foreboding arpeggiated chord, then introduces a fanfare melody that repeats and builds in harmonies and countermelodies for the remainder of the piece. Great stuff, as Johnny Carson used to say.

8. Costin Miereanu Derives (Poly-Art, 1984): Miereanu is French composer coming out of musique concrete. Unlike some of the albums on these lists, both sides/pieces on Derives are superb, comprised of long drones with flurries of skittering electronic activity popping up here and there. Also notable is the presence of engineers Philip Besomes and Jean-Louis Rizet, responsible for Pôle, the great mid-70s prog double album that formed the basis of Graham Lambkin’s meta-meisterwork Amateur Doubles. I discovered this record via the old Continuo blog; Miereanu has lots of albums out, most of which I haven’t heard, but his 1975 debut Luna Cinese, another Cramps Nova Musicha item, is also estimable, although less Minimal.

9. Mikel Rouse Broken Consort Jade Tiger (Les Disques du Crepuscule, 1984): Rouse was a major New Music name in the 80s, as was Microscopic Septet saxist Philip Johnston, who plays here. Dominated by Reichian repeated fills that accentuate the odd time signatures as opposed to an underlying pulse, this will sound very familiar to anyone acquainted with Nik Bärtsch’s Ronin albums on ECM, which use the same general idea but brand it “zen funk” and cater more to the progressive jazz crowd rather than New Music fans, if we can be that anachronistic in our terminology. Jade Tiger also contrasts nicely with Wim Mertens’ more neo-Romantic contemporaneous excursions on Crepuscule. Rouse later performed the admirable (and daunting) task of cataloging Arthur Russell’s extensive tape archive for the preparation of Another Thought (Point Music, 1994)

10. Michael Nyman Decay Music (Obscure, 1976): Known for his soundtracks to Peter Greenaway films, and his still-peerless 1974 book Experimental Music: Cage and Beyond (where I, Jim O’Rourke, and doubtless many other intrepid teenage library goers learned of the Minimalists, Fluxus, AMM, and lots of other eternal avant heroes), Nyman is sometimes credited with coining the term “Minimal music” as well, in an early 70s article in The Spectator. Decay Music was produced by Brian Eno for his short-lived but wonderful Obscure label. The first side, “1-100,” was also composed for a Greenaway film, and has one hundred chords played one after another on piano, each advancing to the next once the sound has decayed from the previous chord (hence the album title). For all its delicacy and silences, you’re actually hearing three renditions superimposed on one another, which occasionally makes for some charming chordal collisions (reminiscent of the cheerfully clumsy, subversive “variations” of Pachelbel’s “Canon in D major” on Eno’s own Discreet Music, the most celebrated Obscure release). This is process music at its most fragile and incandescent. In hindsight it may have also been an unconscious influence on the structure of my piece “A New York Minute,” which lines up a month’s worth of weather reports from news radio, edited so that one day’s forecast follows its prediction from the previous day. I’ve never found the album’s other piece, “Bell Set No. 1,” to be quite as compelling, and Nyman’s other soundtrack work doesn’t hold much interest for me, but I’ve often returned to this album.

11. J Dilla Donuts (Stones Throw, 2006): One more for the road. Rightfully acclaimed as a masterpiece of instrumental hip hop, I have to confess I only discovered Donuts while reading Questlove’s 2013 book Mo’ Meta Blues, where he compared it to Terry Riley. The brevity of the tracks (31of ‘em in 44 minutes) and the lack of single-mindedness make categorizing Donuts as a Minimal album a bit of a stretch, but Questlove’s namecheck makes a whole lot of sense if you play “Don’t Cry” back to back with Riley’s proto-Plunderphonic “You’re Nogood,” and “Glazed” is the only hip hop track to ever remind me of Philip Glass. Plus the infinite-loop sequencing of the opening “Outro” and concluding “Intro” make this a statement of Eternal Music that outstrips La Monte Young and leaves any locked groove release in the proverbial dust. There isn’t the space here to really explore how extended mixes, all night disco DJ sets, etc. could be encountered in alignment with Minimalism, although I would steer the curious towards Pete Rock’s Petestrumentals (BBE, 2001), Larry Levan’s Live at the Paradise Garage (Strut, 2000), and, at the risk of being immodest, my own “The Old Victrola” from Plays Well (Crank Automotive, 2001). On a (somewhat) related note I’d also point out Rupie Edwards’ Ire Feelings Chapter and Version (Trojan, 1990) which collects 16 of the producer/performer’s 70s dub reggae tracks, all built from the exact same same rhythm track--mesmerizing, even by dub’s trippy standards.

Addendum:

Tony Conrad: “Maybe someday Tony’s blistering late 80s piece ‘Early Minimalism’ will be released, or his fabulous harmonium soundtrack to Piero Heliczer’s early 60s film The New Jerusalem.” That was the last line of my entry on Tony’s Outside the Dream Syndicate in the first Top Ten list in 1995, and sure enough, Table of the Elements issued “Early Minimalism” as a monumental CD box set in 1997 and released that soundtrack as Joan of Arc in 2006 (it’s the same film; I saw it screened c. 1990 under the name The New Jerusalem but it’s more commonly known as Joan of Arc). Tony releases proliferated in the last twenty years of his life, which was heartening to see; I’d particularly single out Ten Years Alive on the Infinite Plain (Superior Viaduct, 2017), which rescues a 1972 live recording of what is essentially a prototype for Outside played by Tony, Rhys Chatham, and Laurie Spiegel (Rhys has mentioned his initial disgruntlement upon hearing Outside, as it was the same piece that he had played with Tony, i.e. “Ten Years Alive,” but he found himself and Laurie replaced by Faust!) and an obscure compilation track, “DAGADAG for La Monte” (on Avanto 2006, Avanto, 2006), where he plays the pitches d, a, and g on violin, loops them over and over , and continually re-harmonizes them electronically--really one of his best pieces.

Terry Riley: The archival Riley CDs that Cortical Foundation issued in the 90s and early 00s don’t seem to be in print, but I feel they eclipse Reed Streams (reissued by Cortical as part of that series) and are crucial for fans of his early work, especially the live Poppy Nogood’s Phantom Band All Night Flight Vol. 1, an important variant on the studio take, and You’re Nogood (see Dilla entry above). These days I would also recommend Descending Moonshine Dervishes (Kuckuck, 1982/recorded 1975) over Persian Surgery Dervishes (Shandar, 1975), which I mentioned in the original entry on Reed Streams in the first Top Ten; a lot of the harmonic material in Descending can also be heard in Terry’s dream-team 1975 meeting with Don Cherry in Köln, which has been bootlegged several times in the last few years. Finally, Steffen Schleiermacher recorded the elusive “Keyboard Study #1” (as well as “#2,” which had already seen release in a version by Germ on the BYG label and as “Untitled Organ” on Reed Streams), albeit on a programmed electronic keyboard, on the CD Keyboard Studies (MDG, 2002). As you might expect it’s a little synthetic-sounding, but it also has a weird kinetic edge (imagine the “Baba O’Riley” intro being played on a Conlon Nancarrow player piano) that’s lacking in later acoustic piano renditions recorded by Gregor Schwellenbach and Fabrizio Ottaviucci. But any of these versions is rewarding for those interested in Riley’s early output.

Henry Flynt, Charlemagne Palestine: A few of the artists on that first Top Ten list went from being sorely under-documented to having a plethora of material on the market, and Henry and Charlemagne are at the top of the heap. I stand by You Are My Everlovin, finally reissued on CD by Recorded in 2001, as Henry’s peak achievement, but I’m also partial to “Glissando,” a tense, feverish raga drone from 1979 that Recorded put out on the Glissando No. 1 CD in 2011. Charlemagne’s Four Manifestations On Six Elements double album still holds up well, as does an album of material initially recorded for it, Arpeggiated Bösendorfer and Falsetto Voice (Algha Marghen, 2017). The Strumming Music LP on Shandar is a definitive performance, and best heard as an unbroken piece on the New Tone CD reissue from 1995. Godbear (CD on Barooni, vinyl on Black Truffle), originally recorded for Glenn Branca’s Neutral label (which had also scheduled a Phill Niblock release before going belly-up), has 1987 takes of “Strumming Music” and two other massive pieces that date from the late 70s, “Timbral Assault” and “The Lower Depths”; Algha Marghen released a vintage full-length concert of the latter as a triple CD.

Steve Reich: Not a particularly rare record, but his “Variations on Winds, Strings and Keyboards,” a 1979 piece for orchestra on a 1984 LP issued by Phillips (paired with an orchestral arrangement of John Adams’ “Shaker Loops”), is often overlooked among the works from his “golden era” and I’d frankly rate it as his best orchestral piece.

Phill Niblock, Eliane Radigue: As with Henry and Charlemagne, after a slow start as “recording artists” loads of CDs by these two have appeared over the last twenty years. Phill and Eliane’s music was never best served by the vinyl format anyway—you won’t find a lackluster release by either composer, go to it.

Jon Gibson: I called “Cycles,” from Gibson’s Two Solo Pieces, “one of the ultimate organ drones on record” in the first Top Ten list, and it remains so, but Phill Niblock’s”Unmounted/Muted Noun” from 2019′s Music for Organ ought to sit right beside it. Meanwhile, Superior Viaduct’s recent Gibson double album Songs & Melodies 1973-1977 collects some great pieces from the same era as Two Solo Pieces, with players including Arthur Russell, Peter Zummo, Barbara Benary, and Julius Eastman.

John Stevens: In Top Ten #2 I mentioned John Stevens’ presence on the first side of John Lennon & Yoko Ono’s Life With the Lions; the Stevens-led Spontaneous Music Orchestra’s For You To Share (1973) documents his performance pieces “Sustained Piece” and “If You Want to See A Vision,” where musicians and vocalists sustain tones until they run out of breath and then begin again, which result in a highly meditative and organic drone/sound environment. In my early 00′s Digger Choir performances at Issue Project Room we did “Sustained Piece,” and Stevens’ work was a big influence on conceptualizing those concerts, where the only performers were the audience themselves. The CD reissue on Emanem from 1998 added “Peace Music,” an unreleased studio half-hour studio cut with a similar Gagaku--meets--free/modal jazz vibe. I also mentioned “Sustained Piece” in my liner notes to Natural Information Society’s Mandatory Reality too, if that helps as a point of reference.

Anthony Moore: Back in ’97 I wondered “How and why Polydor was convinced to release these albums [Pieces from the Cloudland Ballroom and Scenes from the Blue Bag] is beyond me (anyone know the story)?” That mystery was ultimately solved by Benjamin Piekut in his fascinating-even-if-you-never-listen-to-these-guys book Henry Cow: The World is A Problem (Duke University Press, 2019)—it turns out it was all Deutsche Gramophone’s idea!

Terry Jennings, Maryanne Amacher, Julius Eastman--“Three Great Minimalists With No Commercially Available Recordings” (sidebar from Minimal Top Ten list #2): Happily this no longer applies to these three, although Terry and Maryanne are still under-represented. One archival recording of Jennings and Charlotte Moorman playing a short version of “Piece for Cello and Saxophone” appeared on Moorman’s 2006 Cello Anthology CD box set on Alga Marghen, and he’s on “Terry’s Cha Cha” on that 2004 John Cale New York in the 60s Table of the Elements box too. John Tilbury recorded five of his piano pieces on Lost Daylight (Another Timbre, 2010) and Charles Curtis’ version of “Song” appears on the aforementioned Performances and Recordings 1998-2018 triple CD.

Whether or not Maryanne should really be considered a Minimalist (or a sound artist, for that matter) is, I guess, debatable, but I primarily see her as the unqualified genius of the generation of composers who emerged in the post-Cage era, and the classifications ultimately don’t matter—remember she was on those Swarm of Drones/ Throne of Drones/ Storm of Drones ambient techno comps in the 90s, and I’d call her music Gothic Industrial if it would get more people to check it out (and that might be fun to try, come to think of it). She made a belated debut with the release of the Sound Characters CD on Tzadik in 1998, an event I found significant enough to warrant pitching an interview with her to the WIRE, who agreed—it was my first piece for them. Her music was/is best experienced live (the Amacher concert I saw at the Performing Garage in 1993 is still, almost three decades later, the greatest concert I’ve ever witnessed) but that Tzadik CD is reasonably representative, and there was a sequel CD on Tzadik in 2008. More recently Blank Forms issued a live recording of her two-piano piece “Petra” (a concert I also attended, realizing when I got there that it was in the same Chelsea church where Connie Burg, Melissa Weaver and I recorded with Keiji Haino for the Gerry Miles with Keiji Haino CD). While it’s somewhat anomalous in Amacher’s canon, making a piece for acoustic instruments available for home consumption would doubtless have been more palatable to the composer herself, who rightly felt that CDs and LPs didn’t do justice to the extraordinary psychoacoustic phenomena intrinsic to her electronic music. “Petra” is more reminiscent of Morton Feldman than anything else, with a few passages that could be deemed “minimal.” Some joker posted a 26-minute, ancient lo-fi “bootleg” (their term) recording of her “Living Sound, Patent Pending” piece from her Music for Sound-Joined Rooms installation/performance series on SoundCloud, which is a little like looking at a Xerox of a Xerox of a photo of the Taj Mahal; but you can still visit the Taj Mahal more easily than hearing this or any of Maryanne’s work in concert or in situ, so sadly, it’s better than nothing (and longer than the 7 minute edit of the piece on the Ohm: Early Gurus of Electronic Music CD from 2000).

A few years after Top Ten #2 I was on the phone with an acquaintance at New World Records, who told me he was listening to a Julius Eastman tape that they were releasing as part of a 3CD set. Say what?!?!? Unjust Malaise appeared shortly thereafter and was a revelation. Arnold Dreyblatt had sent me a live tape some time before then of an Eastman piece labeled “Gangrila”—that turned out to be “Gay Guerrilla,” and is surely one of my five favorite pieces of music in existence (the tape Arnold sent was from the 1980 Kitchen European tour and I consider it to be a more moving performance than the Chicago concert that appears on the CD, although it’s an inferior recording). The other multiple piano pieces on Unjust Malaise more than lived up to the descriptions of Eastman performances that I’d read. The somewhat berserk piano concert I mentioned in that entry seems similar to another live tape issued as The Zurich Concert (New World, 2017), and “Femenine,” a piece performed by the S.E.M. Ensemble, came out on Frozen Reeds in 2016. Eastman’s rediscovery is among the most vital and gratifying developments of recent music history--kudos must be given to Mary Jane Leach, herself a Minimalist composer, for diligently and doggedly tracking down Eastman’s recordings and archival materials and bringing them to the light of day.

The Lost Jockey—I was unaware of any releases by this group besides their Crepuscule LP until I stumbled onto a self-titled cassette from 1983 on YouTube. Like the album, the highlight is a piece by Orlando Gaugh--an all-time great Philip Glass rip-off, “Buzz Buzz Buzz Went the Honeybee,” which has the amusing added bonus of having the singers intoning the rather bizarre title phrase as opposed to Glassian solfège. Also like the album, he rest of the cassette is so-so Pop Minimalism.

Earth: Dylan Carlson keeps on keepin’ on, and while I can’t say I’ve kept up with him every step of the way, usually when I check in I’m glad I did. However I’d like to take this opportunity to humbly disavow the snarky comments about Sunn 0))) I made in this entry in Top Ten list #3. Those were a reflection of my general aversion to hype, which was surrounding them at the time, and of seeing two shows that in retrospect were unrepresentative (I was thunderstruck by a later show I saw in Mexico City in 2009). Stephen O’Malley has proven to be as genuinely curious, dedicated and passionate about drone and other experimental music as they come, and the reissue of the mind-blowing Sacred Flute Music from New Guinea on his Ideologic Organ label is a good reminder of how rooted Minimalism is in ethnic music, and how almost interchangeable certain examples of both can be.

And while we’re in revisionist mode, let’s go full circle all the way back to the very first sentence of the introduction to the first Minimal Top Ten: “I know what you’re thinking: ECM Records, New Age, Eno ambients, NPR, Tangerine Dream. Well forget all that shit.” Hey, that stuff’s not so bad! I was probably directing that more at the experimental-phobic indie rock folks I encountered at the time, and expressing a lingering resentment towards the genre-confusion of the 80s (i.e. having dig through a bunch of Kitaro records in the New Age bins in hopes of finding Reich, Riley, or Glass; even Loren Mazzacane got tagged New Age once in a while back then, believe it or not), which probably hindered my own discovery of Minimalism. What can I say, I’m over it!

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doomedandstoned · 3 years

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Meeting Bomg, Doom-Drone Legends from Ukraine

~Interview by Billy Goate~

Doomed & Stoned continues our week of epic interviews with a long overdue conversation with the great Ukraine doom-drone band BOMG, who have been desamating stages and blowing out amps since 2010. During that time, Nikolay Temchenko (guitar), Yuriy Temchenko (bass), and Anton Khomenko (drums) have put out two mammoth LPs, an EP, and a split.

I first got turned on to BOMG's sound with the record 'Polynseed' (2013), which released the year that Doomed & Stoned was founded. I recommend starting there if this is your first exposure to the mighty trio from Kyiv.

Bomg have been gradually drifting in the direction of full-on drone metal, executed in their own authentic and compelling way, as we're about to discover as we drill into 'Peregrination' (2020) -- which we reviewed last year and Robustfellow has recently reissued.

Give ear...

You state that BOMG means “vagabond” on your Bandcamp page. Can you elaborate on how the name ties in with the band’s history and core identity?

It’s an abbreviation literally meaning “with no particular place of living”. Funny thing is that its’ meaning is degraded in common use (like “bum”), but when it was incepted (60s – 70s in USSR) those who were stigmatized by it were better off going elsewhere than being part of the regime, taking it as a positive. This became somewhat of a short-lived movement even. We think that despite being prone to misunderstanding in every way, it fits the overall vibe. Blessing and a curse. But frankly, the name is a secondary thing at best.

How would you describe your distinctive sound, to someone who has never encountered it before?

Basically, trying to elaborate and add to “Black Sabbath spaghettified” idea. We try to squeeze out any possible amount of low frequency, volume, distortion and effect saturation to the instruments, not necessarily designed for it. As of similarities and influences, it’s 60s-70s heavy psych, proto-metal and proto-punk, 80s - 90s continuation of it (doom metal, stoner/desert rock, sludge, drone doom), besides that – dub, ambient, prog rock, experimental music, field recordings and whatnot.

Peregrination by Bomg

Your new album 'Peregrination' is an explosive bombshell, massive in every respect. When was the concept for the album born?

The first track was almost ready in 2011, we played it at our first show. As of concept, it started to take shape somewhere in 2013-2014, most of the lyrics were written back then. Then it took years to “grow.” First, we tried to make it so each track would fit one side of LP, but it seemed kinda compressed and landed too quick. Then we decided not to confine it to any time limit but each track landed itself around 40 minutes, so we made sure it evens out like this in final recording.

Tell us about the recording process involved. We’re very curious about instruments, gear, amps, and the general studio environment in which it originated.

Each whole track was recorded live (took roughly four weeks for four tracks), then layered with two additional guitars. Synths, field recordings, vocals were added afterward.

Gear: we used two Tank amps (Orange/Matamp clones) made from old soviet broadcast amplifiers and Tesla Disco 240 for guitar and bass (wish our Sunn concert bass was alive at that point, but it just burns transistors when turned on – we couldn’t find an exact schematic for it, even photos of the exact amp on the web, seems like it’s from some transition period).

The drums are '70s Rogers 13”, 16” toms and 24” steel shell bass drum from '50s-'70s (mass-produced for political celebrations, weddings and funerals), coupled with Meinl hi-hats, Paiste Rude China and Zildjian Mega Bell.

Guitars used were early '00s Gibson SG Standard, '72 Musima Eterna Deluxe and ’69 Musima Record; and ‘70 Cremona Violin bass.

Pedals: Poltava fuzz-wah, Noname “flanger” that is actually phaser for bass; Tesla Vrable fuzz-wah (the seller told us that his uncle was under KGB investigation for just having it), Noname dist (most likely a ProCo Rat clone), Vox wah, Boss BF-2, Lel’ parametric EQ, Lel’ digital delay, Boss dynamic wah, Roland Space Echo for guitar.

Recording equipment: Two '70s Oktava ML-19 for overheads, '50s-'60s Oktava ML15 and ML16 for room and various dynamic and condenser mics for everything else into Pro Tools, then later in mixing/mastering stage partly routed through mixer and cassette deck using beaten up cassette for analog saturation and vibrato.

Long story short, we tried to use most of the stuff we got in our studio, and at this point, it’s hard to remember every detail of the process. Referring to the environment, it is compiled of numerous weird gadgets which got to us throughout years, most of which were collecting dust somewhere for decades, and have a history (an entire topic by itself) we’re always asking for. And when used, they tell a story which then leaves a mark in recordings for sure. That was a hell of a fascinating process.

I noticed you had lyrics for each song on 'Peregrination,' but the singing doesn't seem discernable. Are there indeed vocals and, if so, how can I hear them?

Yes, there are vocals. They appear on low volume as reverberated and somewhat oscillated notes, more like presence; on high volume, you can hear words with 1-5 kHz correctly dialed in (on most audio equipment these frequencies tend to be excited, so lowering EQ at this range brings clarity), it appears as a whisper in a loud, saturated mix. Also, we added subtitles on YouTube, so you can know for sure where to find vocals. The point was to make them recognizable only with intent.

Talk about the album art. It seems there is hidden symbolism there, is that true?

It’s some sort of a window that leads to four areas, which are the visualized soundscapes to each track. There were no particular symbols, but the thing is that they fill in the picture as it is set - like a hallucination, which is often a well of meaning where symbols change and multiply interpretations, at the same time being just momentary blobs of form.

The process of making this album cover involved many iterations of drawing, running through GAN networks, editing the result to achieve the effect of a captured hallucination, close to the exact one. When hardwiring symbols directly into it, they would be eaten up by hallucinating AI. So by randomly forming a resemblance of shapes, things started popping out where they fit the most contextually - weird stuff. It’s a common thing in art to throw “open for interpretation” on everything, but this one might be.

What is the concept behind each "hobo" symbol and track on 'Peregrination'?

So, the first one means being quiet and alert, seeing what’s going on. The second one is a sign of a trolley – hopping from one soundscape to another, time travel. The third one – safe camp; it may be confusing when applied to the lyrics, but the position that is stated there facing the object is some sort of a “safe camp”, ground to stand on. The fourth one means “don’t give up”, even if applied in both meanings of this phrase to track. But the symbol references may lack context without diving into tracks.

I'm sure our readers would be most happy if you were to illuminate the meaning of each of the songs on your new album.

Well, it’s like trying to create a soundtrack to some introductory ontological theories (pretty blank, sterile stuff), realizing their intensity. Here uneven-numbered tracks touch on mind ontology, even-numbered - on reality ontology. Not diving into details too much, let them hang there.

I. Electron

Peregrination by Bomg

it's no light of star it's a light of mind walking thru a dream electron shamanism

"Electron" is covering the theme of mythical perception akin to humans and the discovery that put a dent into these beliefs. Variation on a Tunguska story, mythos surrounding Tesla, how people mythologize all around.

II. Perpetuum

Peregrination by Bomg

Across desolations Caravans astray Sand covered roads Forget old ways

"Perpetuum" goes more into sci-fi territory: endless cycles of dead and born-again civilizations, the Great Filter caused by cosmic events or beings themselves, and how we just might unknowingly observe such things staring at the sky.

III. Paradigm

Peregrination by Bomg

Giant web built and set in lines It works when mind reflects Leaving us with all the fears Or letting them disappear

"Paradigm" is based around the tendency of the mind to confine itself into some set of ideas, building a higher fence while thinking it broadens the space. Thinking of one thing while it is the opposite, fear of the structure collapsing while an event like this would alleviate any sort of fear. But breaking a paradigm usually leads straight to the next one, to which the same attributes apply. And keeping this notion brings a safe distance to it.

IV. Emanation

Peregrination by Bomg

Now the opportunity is To see the universe spinning Emit structures boundless Round its' endless borders It's the very first the very last small moment In periods of endless time When the structure merge infinite To manifest as something

"Emanation" goes somewhat contrary to the second one - a reality that may be started at some point, complicates itself, and never is truly repetitive. Also thoughts on subjective existence and the point of it, maybe being an instrument of the Universe to explain it to itself. Speculation on whether or not consciousness flows from one state to another, as energy does, returning to its inception or scattering across until equilibrium, or even said results being the same thing. And the uncertainty of these things that are left to be answered while we as beings, it seems, are just left to fade away.

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#D&S Interviews #BOMG #Kyiv #Ukraine #doom #metal #doom metal #drone #sludge #atmospheric doom #Robustfellow #Doomed and Stoned

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brinytrolls · 4 years

Note

heyy!! i really like your work and think you're SUPER MEGA cool, and hope you get REALLY good at animating!! drawing is the first step, so making it move is the next haha. (once i save enough for a tablet i'll practice a lot!!) but i have a question: how do you improve as an artist? do you actively seek out critique or does it come with time and sub-conscious decisions to not do the bad thing anymore? what did you do? love you, keep fredding on!! ----some stupid idiot who wants to be anonymous

thank u anon this is super sweet!!! it means a lot<3

also ive been an animation student for 5 years now so i know a little bit but probably, less than i should.....i do Not practise enough

as for tips! let me try and compile a short list of things that help me!

• u hear it all the time but its true-practise practise practise!!! sketchbooks, digital, whatever strikes ur fancy. practising is the MOST important thing u can do

• understand and research the basics. you dont need to be an expert on anything, god knows im not, but its good to know a bit! this includes but isnt limited to:

colour theory! why colours go together, what colour schemes look good, etc. heres some basics on it! personally

[i also find symbolism of colour just as important. obviously symbolism varies from person to person and culture! but heres a quick guide on the usual symbolism of colour. if something sounds wrong to you though, mess with it yourself!]

tthe form of subjects-this means drawing basic shapes, and using them to construct [basically] anything! the idea is its much easier to draw and move around a series of cubes and cylinders, than a whole human body. heres a guide on how form works.

draw a box is a challenge recommended to me by my lecturer for improving on drawing shapes and forms! i highly recommend it!

value and lighting are important! heres an explanation on value. im not sure much can be done to cheat lighting and value, except for master studies (we’ll get to that shortly!) and observation.

the most useful tip on value ive learned, is to turn your art black and white, and see if it all has enough contrast without colour. if not, time to work on the values!

composition, babey. how subjects are arranged in a piece. heres a bunch of stuff on it [im still learning this one...rule of thirds i will Die for tho]

anatomy! this is the hardest shit. i still dont get it. my lecturers recommend andy loomis [heres a pdf of his figure drawing book] idt his way was quite up my alley, but u never know!

• speaking of anatomy-life drawing is an INCREDIBLY useful reference. so goddamn useful, u dont even know. they help u figure out anatomy! this includes gesture studies, and more detailed things. i recommend googling how a typical life drawing class goes down/tips for it

life drawing classes are very difficult to access atm, so here are a couple of online resources! [all of these will obv contain nude bodies]

croquis cafe-contains free videos that simulate a life drawing class! videos are more useful than images. has a variety of ethnicities and body types, which is wonderful!

line of action- a site with a variety of images on figure drawing, animal drawing, as well as hands & feet, expression/face focus, and environmental things. you can set it to play as a slideshow for as long as u like, or set it up to be similar in timing to a real life drawing class

online stock photo artists such as senshistock, who has compiled a useful little list of similar accounts over here!

• reference reference reference!! references are so incredibly useful, and anyone who tells you using a reference is cheating is wrong on every conceivable level. reference from photos, from movies, from videos, everything.

something ive had to do in every level of art education is recreations and master studies.

this means collecting artists work from professionals-be it historic painters, movie screenshots, concept artists, anything!

it makes you focus on their compositions, how the lighting works, the colours used, pretty much everything.

this is useful bc it can 1: get you out of your comfort zone and 2: make you use new techniques you might never have considered

online tools such as designdoll and justsketchme have poseable models for you to pose as you please and reference from! suuuuper useful, especially for perspective poses.

• experimentation! fuck around. use brushes youve never used before, try a new medium, collect every free sample from the craft store and just Do Shit with it.

• absorb every goddamn piece of art u have ever come across, and save what you enjoy.

and i mean save everything you enjoy. u like a movies lighting? a certain shot? an outfit? a random piece of fanart u came across? save it! look at it, figure out what it is u like

make a private pinterest board or a folder on ur computer, save everything.

absorb and yank bits from art u enjoy. obviously dont imitate someones entire style, but if u like the way someone draws hands, or noses, or eyes, reference it. recreate it. see what u like, and incorporate it into ur own art

art is a big mess of taking things u like and making it ur own

• study professionals! animations, artists, illustrators. they know what they’re doing.

heres a useful resource with a lot of rare concept art from animated movies! i go here a lot.

buy art books, or acquire pdfs of them, im not a cop, i dont care

• as for critique, i do look for critique, and pay attention to it, but it’s important to know not to take it personally. and i recommend asking people whos opinions you value!

i think thats all i can think of right now in terms of General Art....

if u want me to elaborate on anything or show me art, ask for help or just talk art stuff [character design is my fav and my speciality, ive been studying it for a while 👀] please dont be afraid to dm me or just send me another ask!

best of luck anon, i rly hope this helps! :D

#thats a lot of writing im so sorry #fredspeak #long post #Anonymous #ask #text

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collegeessayguy · 4 years

Photo

This list was compiled by my screenwriter friends Ed and Whit. Thanks, y’all.

Need more fun ideas? Hopefully this helps. Check out Part 2 here.

TO DO

Learn how to cook. From Michelin-starred chef, Massimo Bottura. He hosts an online cooking class on his Instagram and Christopher Kimball’s Milk Street has made its online cooking class free through April 30th.

Live Yoga Classes!

How about origami! One of my favorite skills learned as a child was origami. But my friend Becky had to teach me in person! And we all know “in person” is stupid now. Let’s learn online! It’s free.

Another thing I loved as a kid were Rebus puzzles — those visual word puzzles which hide common phrases. There are hundreds of them on the bottom of this website but make sure to do them in order because they list the answers to the last set on top of the current set.

Have a picnic indoors. Get a video of the outdoors and throw it up on your TV. Then, on your computer or phone, bring up some birds chirping or other nature sounds. Put them both on at the same time, put a blanket on your floor, and have a picnic. Believe me, it’s worth it.

FOR KIDS

A great google doc I did NOT make but was asked to share. Tons of kid-focused lessons and activities. Some stuff for grown-ups, too!

Sesame Street is chipping in because of course they do. They’re making games, videos and more all free. Their content list is constantly being updated so check out this page to keep up-to-date.

The Broad (a great museum in Los Angeles) offers a weekly “Let’s Make Art! Family Workshop At Home.” Every Friday they post a new project on Instagram, Facebook and YouTube. Here’s the first one on YouTube!

Drawing class for kids every day on Instagram. You’ve probably heard of this one. It’s been going around a lot. But just in case, here you go!

TO HELP

Help make masks for our doctors and nurses!

A friend (writer) and his wife (ER doctor) created a tax deductible fund where you can donate money that goes directly to buying meals for ER and ICU staff. If you’ve had the thought of donating food to those on the frontline, this is a great way to do it (and tax deductible!)

TO FEEL

Want to brighten up your day? Watch the Berklee College of Music students sing: “Love Sweet Love.” It’s really great.

Here’s a good article about what you may be feeling. And what you may be feeling is grief.

A friend suggested that since we’re all washing our hands to the tune of “Happy Birthday” multiple times a day, why not include a different friend’s name each time? That way you’re thinking about your good friends Katie and Grant instead of mindlessly singing “Happy Birthday” to no one like a crazy person.

TO WATCH

Part One we listed the Metropolitan Opera’s free shows but other operas are airing their own productions. The Vienna State Opera is showing pre-recorded operas. You have to register but then it’s free. And a new one every day!

Just something to lighten the mood and astound you: a magic trick. But honestly? Maybe the best magic trick I’ve ever seen. I know magic doesn’t usually translate on video but this one does. A true master.

Watch a movie series in chronological order. The Marvel movies come to mind, here’s the list. But there are other ways to watch movie series rather than chronological. How about watching the Star Wars movies in “Machete Order”? Episodes: IV, V, II, III, VI, VII, VIII, IX. Or, for something shorter but still Star Wars, how about this amazing reimagining of the Kenobi/ Vader lightsaber fight. If only all the films were made this well!

You’ve probably seen plenty of places to watch Broadway shows but how about documentaries ABOUT Broadway shows? Here’s a list of some great ones to watch!

I was going to list only the best of this list but Gizmodo has so many good, “nerdy” ideas for free viewing that I’ll just link the article. It includes: CBS All Access, Quibi, Showtime, and Amazon Kids. Also some great places to read: Audible, Internet Archive, and Scribt.

Sports! Sure, the NBA and NFL aren’t playing live games but that doesn’t mean we can’t get FREE access to their Passes. The NBA League Pass is free through April 22nd and the NFL Game Pass is free through May 31st. It’s all replays and classic games but still.... free sports!

And Sir Patrick Stewart is reading Shakespeare every day on Twitter. It’s worth a listen.

TO LEARN

Interview your partner/roommate/child/parent. If you’re quarantined with someone else, why not REALLY get to know them? For many years my job was traveling across the country interviewing strangers for consumer product research. But why does it have to be strangers? Interview your family or friend. Really get to know them for one hour. Ask them questions that don’t normally come up in day-to-day life. “Greatest fear,” “biggest regret,” “dream occupation,” “if you had a magic wand, what would you change in the world right now?” And you can’t say, “Cure the pandemic!” Tip: Have them answer every question in a complete sentence so you can understand their answer without having to hear the interviewer ask the question. Plus, as my boss always told me: “No matter what they say, ASK WHY?” That’s when the answers get interesting. For an ADDED activity, take your interview tape (from your phone or camera) and edit it on iMovie. A one hour interview should cut down nicely to 10 minutes. You get the experience of editing (very easy on iMovie) and then you have a piece of history from your time together.

TO PLAY

Free jigsaw puzzles! For adults and kids. And although I miss the hands-on feel of the puzzle, if you’re desperate, this is pretty good. Make sure to go to Full Screen mode. Makes a world of difference.

Make your own board game! Why just spend time PLAYING when you can ALSO spend time MAKING your game? There are some easy ones like “Can’t Stop” which are great for kids and adults alike. Or how about Otrio? It’s tic-tac-toe but more fun. Just google the game and make your own board and pieces. You can play it on the floor, on a table, or in the yard.

For more ideas, check out Part 2 here.

#COVID-19 #stay-at-home #productivity #things to do #studyblr #have fun

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staysocky · 5 years

Photo

answering a handful of asks under the cut !!

answers & replies here are generally:

brush settings

misc. responses

(MANY OF THESE I’M ANSWERING...VERY LATE.... IM SO SORRY FOR THE DELAY I JUST WANTED TO WAIT A BIT SO I COULD COMPILE EVERYTHING ALL TOGETHER.....)

Anonymous said: Hello friend may I ask about your brush settings? Because I am in love with your colouring and line work!

Anonymous said: Your art is so cute! What brushes do you use?

Answer: i main SAI2 now, but here are the same settings when i was using them in the original SAI!!

(i just copied my own settings in SAI2 now so they should work the same... also sometimes i use the marker tool for doodling nowadays)

Anonymous said: do you post speedpaints anywhere? i'd love to see your painting process! your art style is phenomenal hngh

Anonymous said: Do you have a youtube channel? Just wondering, since I can't seem to find it. I'd like to watch some speedpaints or something .u.

Anonymous said: could do you a tutorial on how you color hair??? its so pretty and baffles me all the time

Anonymous said: Would you ever do a tutorial showing how you draw? I've see you post on how you color but not lineart (ps your style is super duper cute!!)

Anonymous said: Ayy ;3c hello stocky, your art is amazing ;; how is your process for color your drawings? Plz need to know! God bless you♥

Anonymous said: How do you color soooo well? Can I get some tips? ( ;n; )

Answer: i’ve sometimes done lil art streams for friends before! i could use the same capture software to make speedpaints sometime.... i’ve been considering it for a while actually!

my process can be a lil sloppy when i try to break it down into steps for tutorials so i think the best way to show + explain is through art streams (& video process)...

i was thinking of starting art streams on twitch in the near future too... it’s just when i’ll finally be able to get setup finally that i’d be able to set a streaming schedule

Anonymous said: I never played Megaman but I used to watch my older brother play it, and I finally started playing it because of your art too lmao (i love it)

Answer: MEGAMAN GOOD!!! im so glad you’re enjoying the series now too!!

Anonymous said: Socky, will you restock the sanic charms (the knuckles and tails link one) or make other characters?? i love them !

Answer: THANK YOU i’m glad u like em!! each time they sell out i do plan to restock them so no worries!! 👍 I AM AIMING TO MAKE MORE CHARMS OF OTHER SONIC CHARACTERS TOO they’ll come eventually when i’m able to make the designs & get them ordered!!

Anonymous said: ((whispers, this may have been asked before and I wasn't sure where to ask it, but what does "i tried my best x5" mean? is it a reference to something? ;;))

Answer: OH NO WORRIES I’LL CLEAR IT UP!! it’s in reference to a youtube user’s rp comments as “kagamine len”. i’ve seen it MANY years ago & at that time it became sorta an inside joke between me & my friends.

later i referenced/used it as a response a few times on my len askblog to keep it going.

it’s a small lil thing i guess but i’ve sorta adopted the saying now haha

Anonymous said: socks r gr8 doncha think

Anonymous said: ookay im going to sleep now sorry

Answer: no come back you are valid !!

Anonymous said: your aRT gives me heARTATTACKKKS

Answer: BREATHE, ANON

Anonymous said: I JUST FOUND YOUR BLOG AND I LOVE YOUR ART STYLE! <3

Anonymous said: Wanted to say I absolutely love your art and how you draw the Kagamines. Please keep it up!

Anonymous said: HELLO I JUST. WANNA SAY I ADORE YOUR ART AND BLOGS !! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK AND I ALSO WISH YOU ALL THE BEST !!

Anonymous said: your art makes me cry out of joy. I am actually crying because your style makes me so happy!!!! keep up the good work!! <3

Anonymous said: your artstyle. CUTE

@transjackatlas said: you art style is absolutely adorable 💙💚💕

@emmi-san said: I only wanted to say that I love your art style and the cute representations of the vocaloid songs ✨💕

@tyranart said: Your arts wonderful and I hope your day is full of nothing but enjoyment

@thekillermarti said: how do you draw so cute?!

@neykoart said: YOUR ARTSTYLE IS SO CUTE OH MY GOD YOUR TETO DRAWING WARMS MY HEART SO MUCH

@dumiz-hyper-saiyan said: Hiya! I wanted to ask, how is your art so great!? You are so so talented (I know it’s not really a question but I love your drawings so much! I hope we can be friends cause you seem to be a amazing person!) hehe!♥️

@seraphofivorylight said: (￣▽￣) i just found ur blog today and i want to say i really love how soft ur art is !! its super pleasing to look and i definitely wish i could have some of these as prints to slap onto my wall of posters ✨ keep doing ur good work !! i hope ur doing well !!

Answer: THANK YOU SO MUCHHCH!!!!! i’m glad y’all are enjoying my art u folks are the MVPs & it’s super motivating to get your nice feedback _(┐「ε:)_ 💕 💕 //sends you all my lov e

@moderndayoutsider said: Just thought I'd shoot a message and say that I absolutely ADORE your art and you're one of my inspirations <3 God bless! Keep on doing what you're doing! :D

Anonymous said: ahh i wana say that ive been a fan of you for years and youve inspired my own art sm T_T... bout time i told you how much i love ur stuff 💖💖💖

Anonymous said: Woah, I'm a bit new to your blog and I just want to say how cute your art is. I'm literally so glad this was on my recommended. If I hadn't clicked on your blog then I don't know where I would be. To be honest, I would send you this on my real account but I'm actually really afraid to talk to you, and plus I'm really shy heheh. But keep up the good work! You're an inspiration to us all.

Anonymous said: Hi socky!!! I just wanna drop by and say that I love ur art so so so much !! The coloring and shape of it is so appealing and sometimes I spend hours at a time on your social media just marveling your art. It's really pretty!! Keep up the good work ✨✨✨

Answer: sdfgFDGDdsf knowing that u folks are inspired by my works makes it all worth it, i hope u know (;__;💕 💕 thank you so much for sticking around & enjoying!!! it really means A LOT pleas y’all have a lovely week!!

Anonymous said: Do you take commissions?

Anonymous said: Commission?

Answer: I SORTA HAVE COMMISSIONS OPEN tho i take them by a commission form which puts you on a waitlist. i’m more active on my twitter and tweet updates, & handle most contact about them there...

here’s a link to the tweet about my current commission info + the link to the form is inside --> [comm info]

Anonymous said: Where are you from? Your art is so clean and stylish!! 💖✨

@mysticmangaanimepainter said: What year u start drawing???😮

Answer: started drawing wayyy back when i was able to first hold a crayon haha. tho i sorta started paying attention to what i was doing around middle school? started drawing digitally between middle & high school iirc... im from the US also !!

AAAND AGAIN A LOT OF THESE WERE ASKED/SENT VERY LONG AGO..... & IM SORRY FOR JUST NOW ANSWERING THEM... o+<

but to all who’s sent me nice messages & words of encouragement, thank you so much 😭💕💕💕 i rly appreciate em all & even tho i’m not very responsive here on tumblr i rly like to look at and read the messages from time to time;;;💖

#THIS IS SO LATE THERE ARE ASKS SENT FROM YEARS AGO IM SO SORRY HGFDJLHDJ #i'm not very responsive here on tumblr but i do see & love all the good feedback yall have sent!!#ask compilation #answered

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iwillgiveyoumyhappiness · 5 years

Text

김재현, Kim Jaehyun

anonymous asked:

I love it when I catch you looking at me then you smile and look away paired with Kim jaehyun ( nflying )

Group: N.Flying (엔플라잉)

Member: Jaehyun

After a long day at work, three weeks of poorly repressed stress, and leaving the house late and on the brink of an argument with your fiancé, what you expected was a cold, empty house with a lonely, regretful feeling.

What you got, however, was said fiancé—the one and only Kim Jaehyun—waiting anxiously by the door for you, biting his nails while he leaned against the wall outside your apartment.

You furrowed your brows. “Did you get locked out, or—?” you started, already reaching for your keys.

He held up a hand. “Before you say anything!” he said quickly, cutting you off. He dug around in his pocket, pulling out a lavender envelope with cute stickers plastered all over it, sealed with a heart blowing a kiss. “Please read this.”

He looked almost a little shy, handing over the folded paper; a massive change from his usual bubbly personality. You couldn’t help but think you must’ve really hurt him this morning.

You’d grumbled a lot of things you didn’t mean and you wouldn’t liked to apologize to him for it, but you knew he wouldn’t let you until you’d read whatever was in the envelope.

You pried the flap open with your thumb, your palms getting a little sweaty.

Inside, there was a letter. You felt silly for getting so nervous, as most envelopes contained letters, but things that had to do with Jaehyun always made your heart flutter, so you supposed it wasn’t that odd.

You gave him a look before he urged you to read it. You sighed, going straight into it.

“Hey, sweetheart,

it read.

Maybe you don’t want me to call you that right now, and that’s okay. I didn’t say it out loud, so I hope you can forgive me. I think you must be working pretty hard. You look tired.”

Instinctively, you went to rub your under-eyes, positive that there must’ve been dark-circles there, maybe some wrinkles tossed in.

You heard him stifle a laugh. You looked up at him, but he just gestured for you to keep reading, trying to force his smile back down and swallow his addictive chuckles.

“Knew you’d do that.”

You rolled your eyes at his cheekiness that he managed to sneak in, even in writing.

“I just wanna let you know, if you were lashing out because you’re really stressed or something, I understand. I don’t blame you. If it’s because of me, I also don’t blame you. In that situation, I would only blame myself.”

You wanted to rip up the paper and tell him that it wasn’t him at all, but you kept on reading. That small bit of pride that kept pulsating in your stomach forced you not to forgive him so easily, even though he totally deserved it.

It wasn’t his fault that you argued that morning, and you didn’t want him to feel like that. Yet, the mean part of you did. The selfish part. How you wished you could murder that bit of yourself.

“Now, I know that you’ll forever chastise me, saying: ‘Honeyed words don’t fix everything!’, but I think I’ll test my limits, if that’s okay with you. That’s why I have compiled a short list of ten things that make me fall head-over-heels for you all over again, every single day. Ten is really isn’t enough, but I wanted to keep it short so if you forgive me, I can hug you sooner than if I wrote down ALL of the reasons.”

You almost chuckled, but you decided to keep it to yourself.

It was a nice atmosphere for silence, a warm spring breeze blowing gently at your back and ruffling your hair. You could feel how desperately he wanted to push that hair gently out of your face, behind your ear, but he refrained.

You appreciated that.

“Reason #1: Your sleepy face in the morning

It’s super freakin’ cute, and you don’t even notice it. In the mirror, I sometimes watch you while you’re brushing your teeth (not creepy, I swear), and you always look like you’re about to fall back asleep. It makes me want to protect you forever and ever, like a weird, tired burrito.

Reason #2: Your unique sense of humor

It’s not that you’re not funny, really! It’s just that- you’re such an original, sometimes I need you to explain the genius that goes on within your brain. (Please don’t hit me. T-T)”

You smiled at that last bit.

“Reason #3: Your courage

You’re literally the strongest person I’ve ever met, and I’m not just saying that to be cheesy. Remember when your family was going through that tough time, or when they totally didn’t approve of me? Lots of people would’ve just taken their opportunity to walk away from that, but you didn’t. Even though it was hard, you stuck around and you worked it out until the very end. I think that makes you really gorgeous, sweetheart. Probably why I asked you to marry me.

Reason #4: The way you kiss my fingertips

I’ve gotta say, I thought it was really weird when you first did it, but as time passed, it became one of my favorite things. I craved it, and when I didn’t get it, I threw an internal hissy-fit. Like- GIVE ME MY FINGER KISSES, WOMAN. It’s really special and I feel like it’s only for you and me, so I should treasure it more.

Reason #5: You drove me to the ER at 3 AM

You remember that, right? It was before we were even dating! I confessed to you in the car while I was dizzy and almost passing out, but luckily, after I woke up in a hospital bed, strapped up with wires and IVs, I still remembered. And you did, too. You accepted me. Thank you for accepting my weird, unromantic confession. It means a lot.

Reason #6: Making my birthday special every year

You never fail to surprise me with something awesome and thoughtful. It makes me feel like someone truly pays attention to the things I say. The things I like, the things I don’t, and the things that slip out of my mouth when I’m not paying attention. I swear, you know me better than I know myself... I’ve almost cried at so many parties because of you. Do you know how not-manly that is? Speaking of not-manly!

Reason #7: I can sob openly around you

I don’t think you’ve ever judged me, to be honest. I used to think when I first started dating you, ‘Be a shoulder for her to lean on. Don’t crumble and be the pants of the relationship’. Turns out, I was more like the socks. You’re always there for me when I’m not doing well. You force me to eat when I get too skinny, you make me sleep when I’m overworking, and you assure me that it’s okay to cry around you. It’s because of you that I’ve become a crybaby. Sad movie? The tears are coming out. Happy ending? Oh my gosh! I’m so relieved! I better cry. Bad day? It’s okay to let it out, ‘cause I know you’re here to comfort me and make me feel less emasculated.

Reason #8: How much you believe in me

Even when I don’t believe in myself, you tell me how well I’m doing or how much you think I’ve improved, or even how much you love it when I do the most trivial of tasks. You think me folding the laundry and putting it away for you is the coolest thing on the planet, and that makes me want to do it more often, ‘cause you make me feel like a superhero. Your superhero, so it’s even more special.

Reason #9: Your beauty

And I’m not talking about that outward stuff (though... you have that too), I’m talking about what’s on the inside. It’s your soul. It’s your happy heart that’s sometimes a little blue, but it always perks up again. It’s your intriguing mind and thoughts, and it’s your individual charm that no one else could ever hope to live up to. It’s your passion for your dreams, it’s your patience for mine, it’s your generosity, and it’s your wisdom. It’s everything that is you, and it’s beautiful.

Reason #10: When I catch you looking at me then you smile and look away~

This is probably the most important and meaningful thing to me, weirdly enough. It makes me feel like you love me as much as I love you. It feels like you have me on your mind and you can’t help but seek me out. It feels like you care about me to the extent that you’re just like, ‘Huh... Where’s Jaehyun?’, and then when you find me, you smile. Not because I smile at you and you return it, but just because I make you smile. At least, I think I do. It hurts my heart in a really good way. You look so shy, yet confident, and you make me feel adored. I don’t deserve you, I don’t think. Probably never will, but I’m still so glad that you put up with me.

So! With all that being said, do you still wanna marry me? ‘Cause I still love you, sweetheart.”

What a strange, curious thing. You were crying.

Tears were slipping down your cheeks, chin and nose, all soaking the paper and making it crinkly and weak. You started choking back sobs.

Jaehyun heard you—of course—but he still didn’t overstep the boundaries. He waited for your green-light, looking at you with those concerned puppy-eyes.

“Oh, for goodness sake,” you coughed out, rolling your teary eyes. You sniffled loudly and wiped your nose with your sleeve. You held your arms out widely, dropping the paper and envelope to the ground. “Hug me already!”

Within seconds, he came rushing over to you, picking you up and wrapping your legs around his waist. He always held you like this; not to prove how strong he was, just to have you close as possible.

“You still like me?” he asked softly, muffled by your collarbone.

You shook your head, leaning forward. “Nope,” you said. You pushed his bangs up, kissing his forehead. “I still love you.”

Don’t ask me why I chose this gif, please. I felt like it. Accept it as that.

Thanks for the request! It was a lot of fun. ^-^ Very cute, much sweetness, and it was fun to try and work in the concept! Thanks again, and feel free to stop by any time!

I hope you enjoyed it; have a good day/afternoon/evening.

#for anon #kim jaehyun #n.flying jaehyun #n.flying #kpop #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines #kpop fluff #kpop angst #request #reaction #requested #this is really cute

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whentherewerebicycles · 5 years

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okay i am feeling FRANTIC today, just a million million little tasks that all seem to require contacting people and waiting for replies, then all the BIG TASKS that for some reason are stressing me out so much even though it’s basically just LESSON DESIGN and i know i could do that in my SLEEP!!! taking DEEP breaths and now i am just going to write out.

HERE IS A COMPLETE LIST OF THINGS THAT ARE STRESSING ME OUT:

i’m teaching material i technically should know but haven’t thought about in years so i feel panicked bc i can’t tell how much review ill need, and instead of reviewing it im just avoiding it and wasting time panicking

nervous about guest teaching

stressed about not having an outfit in time for the wedding

accidentally overdrew my account this morning and am waiting for a transfer to go through so im just existing IN THE RED right now

millions of small tasks that should be so simple but aren’t bc they require a lot of back and forth and are being complicated by impersonal bureaucratic inefficiencies

have a ton of little things to do for second job and we’re getting into that part of the busy season where texts are coming in at all hours and everything needs to be done Right Away bc hard deadlines

my big work computer has been broken for a week and every email to the tech desk seems to get redirected to someone new, and i hate doing work planning stuff on my laptop bc the screen is smaller and it feels like my work/non-work lives are colliding

also this means that my iCal died with the computer and i haven’t quite managed to reconstruct my calendar from memory so i am never sure if someone is about to drop by or not

ive been waking up late/just being slow getting ready in the morning (HONESTLY probably bc of this lowkey dread i am feeling), and the downside to that is that i have to RUSH to campus with my hair still wet and then start the day feeling super frazzled and wild-eyed

im stressed about upcoming social events (wedding, friend visit) even though i know that both will be amazingly wonderful experiences! it is just that anticipatory social situation dread!

i’ve been spending WAY too much time on my phone in the evening and it doesn’t Feel Good but, bc stressed, i cling to it as grim escapism that actually just makes me feel worse most of the time

okay. OKAY. what can I do?

as soon as i finish writing this, i will take ten deep slow breaths to chill the fuck out. i will then set a timer and spend 30-40 min deciding which two Lorde essays i want to teach and calmly sketching out an overview of the primary source materials i want to use. then i will email the person whose class i am covering.

after that, i will take ten more deep slow breaths. then i will compile all the pdfs i need and figure out how to print those from my laptop. then i will just spend some time reading/doing background research for this other seminar.

then i will readjust if necessary.

at the end of the workday, i will consider today productive if i have:

taken care of room reservation, order questions, tech desk reply

roughly sketched out the activities for the seminar

selected and emailed the readings for the guest class

read and taken initial notes for the instructional part of the seminar

selected a finding aid to use for one of the activities

#daily processing #sorry to just VOMIT my feelings but #i do feel better having written it out

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unproduciblesmackdown · 4 years

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some random numbers: 1, 3, 6, 15, 23, 31, 35, 40. give me ur ungodly long answers.

lmaooo YES brevity whom......i cannot be concise

1) favorite videos?

i sure spent 2010 - 2014 enjoying youtube horror interpersonal-drama series marble hornets, those are a good time. and here in the future you and i both know there is just a wellspring of wrol-related Video Content out there, god damn, i really love so many of them.....in between that there’s sure been a lot of fun and funney videos and like, some Artistique ones i like to revisit [or have disappeared :( ] but i always like to promote this Wuthering Heights one. i love it. oh lol!!!! and the uh, Skate 3 Glitch compilations!!! so so funny

3) favorite memes?

i think Deep Fried Memes are fun all the time lol. the Youtube Meme of “___ but ____” is a lot of fun OH YEAH steamed hams was awesome too. the 24601 Releases A Sammich On Parole ytp is priceless......this is just turning into favorite videos again lmao. vine as a meme and a whole

6)favorite mixes?

you know i never really made or used playlists lol!!!! i will just be like, in the mood for certain songs or else like “i want to listen to music but....which ones”.....i say i can never be concise and all of these answers turning out short lol. it’s not b/c i’m Concise but b/c like, i don’t know what Favorites i have and i don’t have a memory that works without Direct Reminders of Specific Things so i’m just failing to like, come up with the info in the first place smh

15) favorite fictional characters?

here we go lol i can answer this one cuz when i have a fave rave it’s rare and like, easier to remember cuz i do not Go Hard about it that often.....weirdly for the first few years of The Decade i did’t really have such certain faves.....i was def enjoying some characters, as i always do, but nothing like super standout. then in ‘11 or ‘12 or whatever i was like oh hey, ed from cowboybeboy.......and then just had like, the solo experience of me humoring myself w/ that. bit of an usual one b/c a lot of the characters i Really latch on to will tend to be kinda roughly similar in ways that maybe seem pretty at-first-glance levels of obvious, buuut idk she’s not That far off from my usual selections i guess lol. anyways then in 2014 i was like, time to go ham for lars. what a valuable time it was....what Fun we had.....truly tho! and then another interval later it’s 2016 and for similarly (relatable characters of roughly the same cut) i was like, well here i am having a great time re: kip, all while getting to generously use of my fave shade of blue and fangs central and all that fun stuff. and then another interval later the Eventual Unfolding of what started innn 2017 i guess occurs, and it’s late 2018, and i’m like, time to look into Jared Kleinman b/c just from reading the wikipedia summary that didn’t mention him all that much i could tell this was probably a character i’d go ham for for predictable reasons, and the vague interest in that has stuck with me for the past little-over-a-year......and then i was Completely right lol. deh? well that’s just Bonus Jared Lore, to me (though of course alana in her own right is a great and similarly underappreciated character. rights)....and then of course i’ve had a lot of fun with pretty much each and every Wrol Role lmao.......Very fond of jeremy, and also christine, and bmc just has really enjoyable and interesting characters all over the place. and of course, here i am, Extremely #about winston quantbillions as another certified fave rave, really. call it classic!!!

[[answered both 23 and 31 prior, actually.....words were typed....]]

35)a random memory you remember with strange clarity?

tough one because lol a fair amount of “you recorded this memory in a fair amount of detail” is due to increased levels of unpleasantness / stress / discomfort, and if it’s also “i remember this b/c it was Nice” then i wouldn’t call that Strange clarity lol, and Random Memory like “just pull one up from the ol memory bank” is like, god, i wish it were that simple........but give me a min.

oh yeah i had a High Time of it when pokemon go came out (only pokemonn game i have ever played lol) coz there was like, this stretch of Landmarks stops that started at this garden and went along this waterfront / connected park forrr maybe like a half mile stretch? ideal territory and people would actually like, come from out of town to partake in it lol. and i’d Download podcast eps on my phone from my work’s wifi and just like, in the evening listen to that or music and just like, walk and do this shit. i had like five or six gyaradoses at one point cuz i guess the riverside nature of it meant they wanted to throw all these magikarp at you (there Were carp, also! one of the parks had a koi pond.) and like, there were just all these people around doing it along with you, even that late at night and in the early AM hours, so it was fairly social even if u weren’t there with a group or talking with anyone (though there was Camaraderie like, oh hey just so you guys know, there is a ____ over by the boat.) and it was just an interesting Walk with several things to look at and routes to take. and one time in a weird Dead Of Night time like 1am there was this like, smallish cruise ship docked that actually Set Off. and like, a bunch of us randos were just standing there and watching this unfold. this isn’t a very good Clear Random Memory but if i tried to think of a good one, god only knows how long it’d take me lol

40)an important personal revelation?

oh jeez this has really been a decade with lots of the unfortunate combo of “stuff that is a bummer but also boring” lol.......a benefit of getting to spend more time than not Away From The Parents’ House was like, oh sweet, having this perspective for long enough finally leads me to the conclusion of why i hate this......B/c It Is Bad. oh yeah and then there was also conclusively figuring out early in the decade like oh right, i’m trans, that makes sense.......other layers of Gayassedness like oh, more specifically i’m nonbinary, oh yeah and like, i’m not straight, call that queer and/or bi and/or also Gay......bein grey ace like a champ, and aromantic like, oh yeah i’m not like, fucking up at being a person somehow and Letting People Down by not wanting to date them (i mean besides rando cishet men. they can be let down regardless).....and just like, this ongoing process of getting the space to b figuring out myself and what i like For myself in alll kinds of ways....even up till now with the “oh yeah ive been a theatre gay all my life lmaooo” bit that’s like, totally obvious but just like, i didn’t much have the reason to even look at the would-be obvious stuff from the right perspex till now. and it’s pretty fun to realize a Lifelong Area Of Big Interest like that, cuz those sorts of things can feel elusive. and then also unfortunately a lot of the decade has involved like, “oh my self-esteem is so fucked that it’s circling back around and i’m appreciating and valuing myself and that i deserve decent treatment and Not bad shit,” which was a crappy process obviously lol but it was nice when i did start to get there, and making further progress on that front. im not dead certain when i was like “hmm...am autistic” b/c that was definitely a really ongoing process of figuring that out lol, but when / as i did it’s definitely a series of “oh hahaha this is why i’m like This or why i do This or feel like This about This!!” and it’s really easy to learn a totally Brand New Thing all the time abt bein autistic where it’s like Oh #Me!! coz yknow. the info By and For autistic ppl is not always widely available and known of. love that for us

#thank u!!! and thanks for the End Of Decade Ask Meme in the first place lol #cockbiteproductions

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34rfrees3s34 · 6 years

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Glitchedpuppet/Glip/Purplekecleon and Lexy Eevee are on Mastodon

https://awoo.space/@glip // screenshot

https://mastodon.social/@eevee // screenshot

Warnings for child sexual abuse, CSA, pedophilia

SCROLL BELOW TO SKIP INTRO

its time for me to talk about these people. eevee has been on mastodon.social for awhile now and glip just joined awoo.space. i thought for awhile people were not aware of any sort of claims against eevee or who they were affiliated with, but ive begun to realize that in fact no. people are actually aware of the claims, theyre just only hearing eevee's side of it because of his place in the tech community. im fed up fediverse. ive lost countless friends and communities for this, so even though i hate having to be the one to do it, here it comes regardless.

this thread will compile verifiable evidence (aka "not screenshots"). i am not going to speak on the current legal allegations which may never be confirmed/denied, only actions which are archived and shouldnt be overlooked when considering their involvement in our community. i will not be speaking on the issue with marl. marl stayed behind the scenes, i suspect theres a reason for it but that can only be speculation on my part. marl is not on mastodon so im focusing on eevee and glip right now.

to preface this i feel the need to remind everyone that these people have following and support. this is probably self evident but im not just trying to throw anyone under the bus because i dont like them. eevee is a moderately well known programmer/website host and glip is a successful artist. both of them have been around online for a long time, so personally im not gonna hear that theyre the sole victims of 4chan smear campaign. this is the result of long term bad behaviour.

im not here to laugh at these people. i dont think theres anything funny about this situation. i am being as wordy as possible because i see these people being wordy as hell to cover it up too. if youre willing to read their paragraph long posts on patreon pleading for acceptance on behalf of their "poor cute oddball family," you can read this too.

im a completely uninvolved party, but i think they pose a real threat. the extent of my involvement is that i was a fan of glip when they were known as PK (okay bear with me i am bad at numbers/time but i think i was aged 14-15 or something probably), i was not involved in PMD-E and i didnt go to their servers. later i found their porn blog, by then i was around 18-19 at the time i think, so i just wrote it off as "gross," because while im not a fan of porn in the first place i especially think its uncomfortable to see it with childhood based characters. its one of those things i wouldnt have thought about as a minor but i began to realize as i aged. whatever, anyways.

it was only after i stopped following them that i discovered what was going on. so this isnt any kind of grudge, i assure you. i will refer the kiwifarms thread but i took no part in it. ive never met or talked to these people and i never will. also before you suggest it, no im really not going to try to talk to them. countless people have tried to talk to them. i have read many of their posts and claims. i do not trust them. i am staying the fuck away from them.

i know people are invariably going to say to me "well kiwifarms dug this up so you cant trust it!" and to a degree i get it. i do not support kiwifarms for their harassment and mob mentality in general. they are hugely homophobic/transphobic and if it were not for the "funny drama" i think they would have ignored the fact that glip drew child porn as well because they dont give a fuck about lolicon/shotacon.

but i am not going to throw information under the bus just because of where it came from, these people are riding on the hope that people wont be willing to dig through tons of information from kiwifarms to uncover what theyve done. people NEED to pay attention to this if theyre going to have these people in their circles. the admins of awoo.space and mastodon.social are to be held responsible for giving these people platform. these people cannot undo the harm which they've willfully perpetuated, no amount of apologies can ever make up for this. get them out of our spaces.

this thread will not be a complete example of their behaviours by any means and i do believe the kiwifarms thread has a lot of it which should be looked at and accounted for when judging this. i believe they have been a danger to children on the internet for a long time in more ways than one. i think it started as smug/dramatic deviantArt personalities and grew into something hideous. there are accounts of them harassing and making fun of other artists and children (and i still see them doing it), but i am focusing on the more immediately harmful stuff.

finally i would like to remind people that this entire group of people has stuck together through these allegations, for that reason i feel we shouldnt overlook eevee’s actions for glip’s, or glip’s actions for marl’s. theyre all aware of whats going on and this is only going to give them more leeway when being faced with these serious problems. they’re going to rely on each other for as long as they can slide by doing that.

END SCROLLING HERE TO SKIP INTRO

eevee defending ownership of child porn- SCREENSHOT (including just because its easier to read): https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/eevee-defend-jpg.38156/

ARCHIVES (for confirmation): http://tweetsave.com/eevee/status/244965411521708032 http://tweetsave.com/eevee/status/244966006211092480 http://tweetsave.com/eevee/status/244976970209837056 http://tweetsave.com/eevee/status/244978882191695872 http://tweetsave.com/eevee/status/244985791657426946 http://tweetsave.com/eevee/status/244990121911414784 http://tweetsave.com/eevee/status/244993723384078336

eevee in response to someone talking about their actual, real CSA says he wishes that was him (its 10 years old but shouldnt be thrown aside)- ARCHIVES: https://archive.is/5JTEL#selection-2833.0-2833.57

glip's collection of child porn which she drew herself of her own characters (yes these ones are screenshots hosted on kiwifarms but you cant fake that much art)- THREAD LINK: https://kiwifarms.is/threads/melanie-herring-purplekecleon-pk-papayakitty-glitchedpuppet-floraverse-forbidden-flora.5567/page-514#post-2411146

ARCHIVES: http://oresund4.rssing.com/chan-3345726/all_p11.html

glip includes a ball gag as an accessory in a deviantArt roleplay game (PMD-E) she and the group hosted which was knowingly comprised of mostly children- ARCHIVE: https://comments.deviantart.com/1/290954538/2461459333?offset=0#comments // archive

glip also then took the ideas of that project and turned it into a physical doujin to sell, note some of these are the same characters those children interacted with in the ARPG and she still continues to include children in the stories themselves: ARCHIVE (page is SFW but comes from a doujin she published): https://archive.is/3ObC1#selection-435.8-435.19

here's her character from PMD-E having sex with a child- ARCHIVE !!!VIEW WITH EXTREME CAUTION!!!: https://archive.is/YlCzT

more "dubious age" character porn LINK WITH ARCHIVES INSIDE !!!VIEW WITH EXTREME CAUTION!!!: https://kiwifarms.is/threads/melanie-herring-purplekecleon-pk-papayakitty-glitchedpuppet-floraverse-forbidden-flora.5567/page-515#post-2411705

she tags her own porn with shotacon- LINK WITH ARCHIVES INSIDE: https://kiwifarms.is/threads/melanie-herring-purplekecleon-pk-papayakitty-glitchedpuppet-floraverse-forbidden-flora.5567/page-515#post-2411899

she even contributes to a cub porn/shotacon magazine, credited as 'papaya kitty': ARCHIVES !!!VIEW WITH EXTREME CAUTION!!!: https://archive.fo/jaHzt https://archive.fo/IczP7

HERES ANOTHER POST I FOUND WHICH OUTLINES SOME MORE QUESTIONABLE SHIT AS WELL:

https://bestofglitchedpuppet.tumblr.com/post/162852252909/callout-glitchedpuppet

#purplekecleon #glitchedpuppet #glip #eevee #floraverse

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