#it's a part of the creative process where it doesn't look like how you imagined it yet it's still wonderful - I love it just

[ask-whitepearl-and-steven]

Would you mind sharing your planning process of the comic? I'm starting to brainstorm a fiction idea and right now the ideas are very messy and I wanted to know if you could show how you plan what happens on a season and on an episode, maybe with an example of a season episode you already published, so I can learn how to organize myself?

I really, REALLY appreciate you coming to ask me for help with this. It's awesome to hear that you respect my writing enough to seek me out as an authority on such things, or at least enough to ask for advice.

But I'm gonna be real with you - what you're asking for is not a quick slapdash reply that I can whip up in my free time. What you're asking for is an hour long video essay (with examples) on the level of an educational creative writing online course.

And I--I don't know if I have it in me to do that right now. Not with everything else I'm trying to do. (Sorry.)

BUT.

What I can give you instead is a basic rundown, and maybe some recommendations for where to this stuff.

To be absolutely brief: For me, the best way to visualize how I plan would be to make a flowchart.

Keep in mind that....... I don't ever actually.......MAKE. A flowchart.

Mostly, I am just using this as a visual representation of how my ideas flow from and to each other in a coherent way. The reality is that this skill is something you have to develop until it becomes second nature.

As an example, let's take the episode(s) where I introduced Seaglass.

This little arc was planned in season 3, but really started to come into play in Season 4.

To make it happen, I started with the obvious main idea: SEAGLASS.

I then broke it down into multiple smaller ideas:

If you notice, the main plot of this doesn't even start when the Seaglass exposition does. Steven makes Seaglass back in season 3, but doesn't know about it. But these ideas are still important to acknowledge as being a part of the main plot.

I then fill in MORE space between these larger ideas.

This whole set of steps is just a logical progression of me playing 'how do we get there'. I make up plot points and say 'what happens to get from A to B?'

And keep in mind - this may seem kinda obvious. That's because... it should be! But that's how the planning happens.

Realistically, it's just a bunch of asking myself questions. The same exact questions I refuse to answer in asks.

"What happens next? What would happen if....?" "Why doesn't Steven know about ....?"

"How would Steven find Seaglass if he doesn't know she exists?"

Well she's small and green, kinda like Peridot. So he goes looking for Peridot and mistakes Seaglass for her.

BAM! You've got yourself a plot point. That's a plan, baybee!

And then just kinda rinse and repeat.

And eventually, you want to make sure that you have some sort of connection back to the main plot point. In this case, it's the realization that Steven CREATED LIFE.

Again, I want to stress - I don't actually........plan.... by writing this down.

I do this process in my head. Often, multiple times per chapter, writing and editing to make it make more and more sense. The important part is about asking yourself questions. The same questions your readers should be asking.

"Why is this character doing this?" "Why is this event happening NOW?" "How will A find out when they realize what B has done?" "What is the BEST time for B to find out...? What is the WORST time?"

All of this takes imagination. It isn't about organization. It's moreso about learning to tetris plot events into their most snug spaces. It's about thinking of events as a staircase, which eventually leads to a larger staircase of plot arcs.

And as a final note, I will say that someday, when I'm less busy, I may make a video about plot. But it will take more time and effort, and for now, please just watch videos by other creators! I'm sure they're just as good at it as I am.

#chekhov answers #plot

[doumadono]

I just wanna know why so many adult mha smut creators say they age up minors as if it justifies their attraction to them. Would you say it's okay to age up Eri too?

Ah, aging-up fictional characters, my favorite controversial topic! ♥ You know, I was low-key anticipating an anon to drop this kind of question, sooner nor later (what a pity you didn't have balls to come off-anon tho!). I've had my fair share of childish anons before, and trust me, those went straight into the digital dumpster. But hey, this time, I've decided to lay it all out on the table, crystal clear 🙅‍

You know, I've done it all – murder, rape, summoned demons, even glorified Satan and had several children killed in my stories. But guess what? Not a single pair of handcuffs in sight! 😎 And don't get me started on the horror section at any bookstore - it's like a buffet of dreadful deeds.

Let's be real, the purity police can take a hike. There's something oddly fishy about the fact that fanfic, mostly crafted by awesome writers, gets the brunt of the criticism or some ridiculous accusations, especially the smutty bits, while the gruesome stuff gets a free pass 🤷

Look, folks, it's all about context. Fiction is a realm where creativity knows no bounds, right? So, if I want to age-up a character for a mature storyline, I'll go for it 🤷 Look, it's all a part of the creative process. Fiction is like a playground where we can swing from the monkey bars of imagination, right? Aging-up fictional characters is a common practice in creative communities, and it's important to remember that these characters exist solely within the realm of fiction - they are not real, so it doesn't hurt them in any single way. It allows creators to explore different scenarios and relationships without crossing any ethical boundaries :) Also! Aging-up characters isn't some sneaky scheme to write "inappropriate" content about youngsters. It's about taking characters you adore or find fascinating and giving them a new lease on life. It's like those college AU fanfics for characters in their late 30s or kidfic for full-grown adults. It's all about exploring different phases of their lives. So, whether it's smutty or not, the essence remains the same 😎 You see, the whole "aging-up" thing in fanfic/fanart is just common sense. We're not into the whole "let's sexualize kids" scene, so we gracefully turn our characters into adults. It's all about creating content featuring responsible, grown-up folks. And let's get real, if reading about something meant you were all in on it, then every mystery novel reader out there would have to be either an undercover detective nor a murderer 😎 So let's dial down the judgment and just enjoy our creative freedom, shall we?

But you know, trying to equate aging-up with things like grooming/pedophilia is like saying eating a banana is the same as piloting a spaceship because they're both hands-on activities. Let's keep our perspective here, folks, and not get too carried away with the terminology 😂

If you don’t want to read those stories (containing aged-up characters/dark content/smut with aged-up characters) - then don’t read them - problem solved!

Oh, how times have changed, my friend! Back in the day, I used to let all those comments and anonymous hate bring me down. But guess what? I've evolved, and I've got news for the critics: I write what I want to write, and nobody's gonna tell me otherwise. I've got this little thing called free will, and I'm not about to hand it over to anyone who thinks they can dictate what I should or shouldn't put on paper. If that means ruffling a few feathers, so be it. I've shed my tear-soaked days and embraced the fact that I couldn't care less about those sensitive souls who can't handle a bit of fiction. So, to all you "snowflakes" out there, if you're trying to stifle my creativity, good luck, because I'm just going to crank up the heat and write even smuttier storylines with aged-up characters! Thanks for the encouragement, dear Nonnie – you've only fueled my fire! 🔥😎 I might even consider writing some very dark-themed fic with aged-up Eri, why not! 😈

Oh, hey Anon! Quick question for you. Have you ever picked up a Stephen King book? You know, the master of horror and suspense? Well, if you have, you might've noticed that he doesn't shy away from some pretty explicit content, and not just with adults. Sometimes he writes about kids too, and they're sometimes off legal age as well! Surprise, surprise. You can stroll into a bookstore, grab a book off the shelf, and guess what? There's a good chance that some of those books contain content that would make a sailor blush! Yet, the world isn't collapsing because of it. The point is, even in mainstream literature, you'll find situations that might make you raise an eyebrow. So, let's not throw stones at age-up fiction creators when the literary giants sometimes walk on the same edge, right? 😏

In the conclusion, if you've got a problem with aging-up fictional characters, dear Nonnie, you might want to take a chill pill and remember that it's all just a bit of fun in the end ♥ Well, you know what would truly make my day? If you took the liberty to hit that "block" button with glee and gracefully vanished from my interactions. And if, by some chance, you decide to stick around, don't hold your breath for a response. I'll be too busy conjuring up some fiery, smutty tales featuring Bakugo or Shoto or any other character I like to bother with your, shall we say, less-than-enlightening queries. But hey, chin up, pal – here's a little nugget of wisdom from your "older and wiser" friend: go get a life. It's an absolute game-changer 😜 I'm tagging some content creators who write dark fics or use aged-up characters and might face similar anons/anon hate: @mrskokushibo @ectologia @kyojurismo @bakubunny

#aged up characters #asked and answered #anonymous #go get a life #your ask made my day though #I'v been waiting for so long for an anon like you! ♥ #i'm being sarcastic

[tillthelandslide]

Insufferable Arsehole Part 7: All I Need To Hear

a/n: okay i actually really love this chapter (it might be my fave so far) ... ready for some cuteness between lou and matty and some protectiveness from the boys? i sure hope so. hope you enjoy it

Warnings: smut, fluff, spelling/grammar mistakes

IA Masterlist

Part 6

Minors DNI

Lou was sat on the front of the stage, her legs dangling over the side, her guitar rested in her lap and her notebook was sat by her side, the edges were frayed and ink was spilled on the surface. By every sense of the word, it was worn; beaten up and used. She loved it nonetheless and took it everywhere with her, it was quite a thick notebook, stuffed to the brim with songs of course, but also pictures she had taken (of her loved ones, her fans, strangers, nature, everything you can imagine), fun things she had found like flowers that she pressed to preserve, receipts from places she had visited, small mementos people had given her: it was all apart of her creative process.

She had several like it back home, but nothing made her happier knowing that this notebook was also filled with Matty now, Polaroid's she had taken of him throughout their time together, making up for the years where he wasn't present.

A pen rested between her teeth as she strummed and hummed, she occasionally stopped to write something down before playing again.

Matty was watching intently at the side of the stage, listening to how her voice somehow filled the empty venue, despite it being huge and her not having a microphone. He was enamored with her, well and truly infatuated. He loved how she used notebooks too, not opting to write it on her phone like some people, she found it easier to write this way and so did he, the words flowed out of them easily.

"And I'm, on, my way to believing" she sings, liking the words so writing them down, nearly finished and happy with the song she was writing.

"Can feel you staring y'know" her voice catches his attention then, she didn't look at him as she spoke, too heavily focused on what she was doing. He feels like a child who was caught doing something he wasn't supposed to, his cheeks flush and he looks down at his feet.

"You can join me if you want..." She says, turning her head to look at him now, his heart pounds twice as hard and three times as fast as her soft eyes find his, as her lips prick up into a smile upon seeing him. He can't help but smile at the way she pats the spot next to her, it was cute.

He was wearing a hoodie which was a size or two too big for him, black jeans and his hair was slightly askew on his head. She liked him best like this, this was her Matty, not the persona he had created for stage, or interviews or online. This was just Matthew Timothy Healy, the boy she grew up with that she hated for most of her life, who had turned into one of the best things that had ever happened to her.

The boy she hated felt like a distant memory now, she doesn't know how long it's been since he confessed his feelings but she truly doesn't care. Every bad memory she had of him was overwritten by a wonderful one, ones that made her heart flutter and butterflies swarm her stomach.

She realises as he walks to her that he's not wearing shoes, his feet clad in a pair of black socks, making his footsteps that much lighter. His movements are slow and fragile, not wanting to disturb her thought process. He truly can't even believe she's letting him witness this, he finds it quite intimate, watching someone write.

He doesn't speak for a few minutes, just listening to her, watching her intently as she plays a few chords, then jots them down in her notebook, singing beautiful words, before she's scribbling them down.

"Sounds beautiful darling" he says, quietly, needing to tell her his opinion but not wanting to interrupt her.

"Thank you Matty" she says, still not looking at him.

"I can leave if you need to be alone" he says and she looks at him then, frown resting on her face.

"Hey no. It's okay. Don't leave. Quite like having you here" she says, her words rushed and panicked.

"Okay I'll stay" he says, leaning forward to place a peck to her cheek, awkwardly moving around the guitar.

He doesn't quite know what to do when she doesn't continue writing or playing. She's just staring at him, before she puts her guitar down next to her.

She leans her head onto his shoulder, looking out at the venue. She used to dream about playing venues like this when she was a kid, when they were just kids playing in George's garage.

When her own band started selling out venues similar sizes to the one they were at, sometimes bigger, she couldn't quite believe it, she suffered with imposter syndrome for many years during the beginning of her career. But something about this, playing with the four guys she loved most in the world (and becoming friends with some of the best people she had met including Jamie Squire, John, Carly and Polly) ... It was different.

But recently, she felt unbelievably guilty for being so happy here, the idea was ridiculous. She missed her band, but was also having the time of her life with the guys. She believed that if her own band knew how she was feeling now, the happiest she had ever been and unbelievably in love; they would maybe feel jealous and Lou felt guilty because of that.

"Are you okay, love?" He asks, voice still quiet, scanning her features, trying to work out how she was feeling.

"I... Um" she hesitates, she moves herself from his shoulder then, looking at him. Her thoughts are clouded with all the negative things she's been pushing down recently: the fact that she had been receiving an influx of hate recently, the fact she was missing her band and her family, the fact she was feeling a little lost, if not momentarily.

He sees the tears prick at her eyes and he's quick to pull her into his arms, lips pressing against the side of her head, into her hair, trying to soothe her. He realises this is the first time he's ever seen her cry and the sight cracks open his heart.

"Hey darling it's okay, I'm here" and truly that's all she needs to hear to stop her tears from falling.

"Talk to me" he says after a beat. He feels bad that he can't help but feels grateful that he's the one experiencing this for a change. Usually George or Ross would be in his place right now... Sometimes even Hann. But for once he got to have her like this and that thought (although selfish) was everything to him.

"I miss my bandmates..." She admits (only scratching the surface of what was really wrong) and the confession pangs at his heart for a bit.

"Are you not enjoying yourself anymore?" He asks and she moves to look at him.

"No... No it's not that. I- I miss them. But I feel guilty more than anything" she admits and he knows not to talk, to just listen, because that's what she needed at that moment.

"I feel guilty because I'm with you guys, having the best time. And they keep asking if I'm coming back and... I can't help but feel like I don't want to. I don't want this to end because it's been perfect. We haven't even been on tour that long but it's the best" she says, sniffling as more tears threaten to fall.

"But they know you're needed for the whole tour right?" He asks and she nods.

"Truth is I don't ever want to leave you guys... You've all made me feel... The most alive I've ever felt in my life... Especially you Matty" she admits and his breath falters at her words.

He made her feel alive. He doesn't quite know what to do with that yet but he'll unpack that idea when he's alone. For now this was about her and giving her a safe space to speak.

"I loved being on tour with them, don't get me wrong. I love our fans and our songs and... They're my best friends, you know... It was fun... But... You guys feel like family... When I'm with you... When I'm on that stage with you all, I feel like everything is going to be alright" she explains and he nods. He truly felt that too, even before she started helping them out on this tour. He admits that it's gotten better since she's joined and the thought that one day she has to leave, it truly pains him.

"You know you're a part of this family now. Always have been really. That's never going to go away love" he says and she knows his words are true.

"And if they truly love and care about you they'll understand how you're feeling," he says.

"I can't stay here forever though Matty. Eventually Carly will be back, where she's supposed to be, and I'll be on the opposite side of the world to you guys" she says and again the thought pains him.

"Unfortunately we can't change that love. I know that's a sucky thing to say but we can't. We just have to make this time we all have together, count" he says and she nods, knowing he's right.

"You're right," she says.

"We will continue to play the shows, we will spend every waking moment with each other. And I... I'll shower you with love every day... And when the time comes to say goodbye... Maybe it won't hurt as much, yeah?" He says, pressing a soft kiss to her lips.

"Yeah" she nods, feeling slightly better now, although she knows the more time they spend together, the more it will hurt to say goodbye. But she can't think about that now. So she decides to live in the moment, with the man she was falling in love with and her three best friends.

----------------------------------------------------------

A day off on tour was infrequent to say the least, but today they had one. They often wouldn't have time to actually do anything, they would either be too tired to wander the streets of whatever city or town they were in, or Jamie would be worried about them getting swarmed by fans. But yesterday, they had arrived at the city fairly undetected due to their flight arriving late at night. So with much persuasion from all of the band, Jamie was letting them explore today.

Lou couldn't control her excitement, so woke at 7am, she knew Hann might be up but the rest of the band would likely be asleep still. She slipped out of bed, hearing a groan from Matty, who's hand slipped from around her waist. Despite his groan, he didn't wake and Lou sighed thankfully.

She took a long, peaceful shower before slipping on a pair of jeans and a white crop, she smiled to herself as she applied some makeup, the "M" necklace dangling in front of her chest.

She slipped out of their hotel room, trying her best not to wake Matty. Their rooms in this particular hotel were all connected, she swore Jamie did it just to force Lou and Matty to shut up for a day or two (not that it stopped them). Each bedroom was connected to a large room in the middle, where there were large leather sofas and a small kitchen hidden in the corner. She spotted Hann sitting at the island there, reading a newspaper as he drank coffee from his mug.

He looked up from what he was reading, offering her a smile as she walked closer to him.

"Good morning sunshine" she says, her voice still quiet, too early to be louder yet.

"Sleep well?" he asks, already grabbing a mug and pouring her a coffee as she comes to sit next to him on the island. She nods at him and he smiles. Her eyes find the paper he's reading, seeing their faces sprawled out across the front cover, smiling at the group picture that was taken of them.

"What are they saying about us this time? Any slander?" she asks and he chuckles, eyes wandering over the paper.

"It's quite nice actually, makes a change really" and she nods at his words, taking a sip from the coffee, nice but not as good as the ones Matty makes for her she thinks.

"There's a lot of questions about you and Matty though Lou" he says, a hint of worry detectable in his voice.

"Yeah..." her voice trails off "been seeing a lot of articles come up on my phone too... People tweeting me too" she says and he looks at her then, trying to sense what she's feeling.

"You know you don't have to tell anyone what you are right??" Hann says and she nods at his words.

"Can't help but wonder if we're doing the right thing" she says, knowing he is exactly the right person to talk to about this. Hann will always tell her how it is.

"What do you mean love?" he asks, needing some more information before he gives his insight.

"No matter what we do... people are going to hate us... some people anyway. If we tell people the truth, that we're just having fun, enjoying time together, figuring out whatever this is... then they might hate us... if we carry on doing what we're doing, not confirming it but not denying it either... people are going to continue to say we're being unfair... not telling our fans the truth" she says and he nods.

"He makes you happy right?" he asks and she nods again.

"And I know for a fact that you make him happy. When you're with each other, does any of it matter? What people might think or say?" he asks and she shakes her head"no ".

"So agree you'll deal with the consequences together, either way, whatever you choose" he says and she leans on his shoulder.

"Thank you" she says and he briefly grasps her hand, giving it a soft squeeze.

"You've been there for me with all the Carly stuff in the old days, only returning the favor" he says, but they both know it's more than that. The whole group would do anything for each other, they'd die for each other if they had to.

"What would I do without you Adam Hann?" she asks and he chuckles.

"Probably let George, Ross and Matty delude you into thinking the sun shines from your arse" he jokes and they both can't help but howl at how funny they find it. They hear two doors open after that, each revealing a grumpy band member: Ross and George.

"What the hell is going on out here?" Ross says and he says the two of them laughing.

"I know you can't be laughing at Hann, he really is not that funny" George says, the next to join them, placing a soft kiss atop her head. George's eyes drift to hers, searching around her as if she was missing a limb.

"Where's the grump?" George said, a nickname they had given Matty because he was definitely not a morning person.

"Sleeping" she says, a smile creeping its way up onto her face, no matter how hard she tries to hide it.

"Oh look at you" he says, gripping the apples of her cheeks.

"Shut up" she says, shoving him.

"Well I'm not waking him up" Ross says as he plonks down on a sofa behind them. She sees John leave his room, coming to sit with Ross and before she knows it George is leaving her to join them too.

She stands, hugging Hann quickly to say thank you before she grabs another mug, pouring a coffee for Matty before standing up and walking to their room.

"Please for the love of god dont have sex whilst we're all awake" she hears George shout and she laughs.

"Wouldn't be the first time George" she shouts back, hearing him groan as the others laugh.

She slowly opens the door to their room, eyes flinching as she sees him stir in his sleep at the light that makes its way into the room.

She moves leisurely across the room, not wanting to suddenly wake him. She carefully places the coffee cup on his bedside table. Kneeling next to his side of the bed, her fingers drift across his hair, pushing the curls away from his face so she can see him better.

Sleep is etched across his features, his eyebrows furrowed almost in a frown so she places a soft kiss there, careful not to wake him yet.

His soft snores continue to fill the room and she smiles, she doesn't quite want to wake him, he just looked so darn peaceful.

"Matty" she says his name softly, accompanying her words with a kiss to his cheek making him stir. She repeats his name again, placing another kiss to his lips this time.

"Hmm" he mumbles, the kiss awakening him, out of instinct they press firmer against hers and his hand is quick to grab the back of her head, not letting her go just yet. She laughs against his mouth and he smiles, breaking their lips for a few seconds before they're back on hers.

"Morning" he grumbles, his morning voice awakening something inside her, like it always does.

"I made you coffee" she says, trying to distract herself from the feelings his voice draws out of her.

"Mhmm" he says, pulling her up from her knees and grabbing her so she falls on top of him.

"Now isn't that so much better?" he says, voice deep, the vibrations resonating in her chest.

"Matty we have to get going, everyone else is up" she says.

"Mhmm, everyone is up" he says, his words having a completely different meaning to them, and she knows exactly what he means as he raises his hips up to hers. She can feel him hard and heavy beneath her and her breath becomes bated at the feel of him, looking down at him she sees the all too famous smirk resting on his lips as his usual dark eyes are blown wide.

"Someone's definitely awake now" she says and he flips them, making her chuckle.

"Had a dream about you" he says as he smears his lips against hers, she tastes like coffee and he groans at the taste.

"Clearly" she mumbles against his mouth, making him chuckle.

They're abruptly disturbed by a loud knock on their door.

"What!" Matty shouts, making her chuckle.

"We have plans, remember!" they hear George say and Matty groans as Lou pulls away from him.

"He's right. Come on" she says, pressing against his chest to slip out from underneath him before tugging him upwards, out of the bed.

"You can sort that out in the shower" she says, gesturing to his erection.

"You will be the death of me" he confirms with a firm kiss to her mouth, one that completely knocks the air from her entire body, especially when his tongue aggressively presses against hers. He leaves her after that, stunned and a little bit (or a lot) turned on.

She returned to the others in the larger room, sitting by herself as they were wrapped up in some conversation she had no interest in partaking in, something about football.

She found herself scrolling on Instagram, interacting with fans who had commented on her recent uploads, a few of which were of Matty. She couldn't help but read some of the negative ones too, and suddenly she was in a deep trance, reading negative comment after negative comment. A few people were calling her a "slag" or "slut" and it did make her chuckle but also made her stomach churn. She has always had this desire to be liked, and when people didn't like her, she hated it.

She hadn't realised how long she had been scrolling but suddenly Matty was standing in front of her, his shadow casting over her features, but even that didn't make her eyes leave her phone.

He called her name: no reply. It wasn't until he was pressing his fingers against her chin lightly that she looked up at him.

"Ready to go love?" He asks, his features soft as he looks down at her, thumb gently running along the apple of her cheek, feeling like something wasn't quite right.

She tries her hardest to push the thoughts away, and does so quite successfully. She nods up at him, taking his hand as she stands.

"So I think John, Hann and I are going to go to this record store" Ross explains and Lou, Matty and George nod. Jamie, Jamie (manager) and Polly agree to stay at the hotel, needing some alone time.

"We can meet somewhere throughout the day? I'll call you" He asks as he pulls her to his chest, hugging her tightly, before hugging the others. She quickly hugs Hann and John, saying their goodbyes.

Lou, George and Matty decide to go to a local park, walking along in the sunshine, talking about all sorts. They pick up an ice cream each along the way, each trying each other's flavors. Matty walks with his arm hung over Lou's shoulders and she takes pictures of them throughout the day.

A couple of fans notice them and kindly (and quietly) ask them for photos which they accept. They appreciate that they don't draw attention to them, letting them enjoy their day off in peace.

They continue walking along the park, stopping to look at the trees, to guess what type it was (as if any of them had a clue), Lou would often stop at different flowers, naughtily plucking a few and begging Matty to let her weave it into his hair.

"Stop being a pest" he chuckles as he attempts to push her hands away from his hair.

"C'mon Matty! You'd look adorable... Please" she pleads with a pout on her lips. Matty has to seriously resist the urge to place his mouth against hers to remove the pout.

"C'mon G help me out here" she says and George holds his hands up.

"I'm not helping you with anything" he says and she frowns.

"You're both boring old men now" she says, Matty and George share a look as mischief clouds their features. They both set their eyes on her and she knows she's screwed. They both run towards her, George picking her up off the ground by her waist, Matty quickly finds her sides, tickling her. She squirms in her best friend's arms and all three of them laugh way too loudly.

A few onlookers scowl at them as they walk past making them chuckle as she's set back on the floor.

"Miserable fuckers" George's says as they laugh. They continue their walk along the park together, eventually wandering off into town to meet the boys in a coffee shop Ross had told them to meet them at.

He had popped a heads up in their group chat (a new feature for their group) that a group of fans was crowding outside, not too many, about 4 or 5. He said they seemed nice enough and said they're hellos and then let them enter the shop.

Lou found herself getting nervous the closer they got to the coffee shop, what if they hated her? What if they were amongst the few that had started to post mean things on social media?

George seems to sense something is wrong and hooks his hand in hers, squeezing it tightly. They see the group that Ross had texted them about, she spotted almost instantly the daggers they were shooting her way.

George's hand nearly slips from hers and she's quick to whisper "please don't let me go" to him, he doesn't need to be told twice, placing his hand firmly in hers.

The group are quick to say hello to Matty, pulling him in for hugs and pictures. George gives Lou a look as they look at him and she nods, letting go of his hand reluctantly. She awkwardly stands there, getting the sense they didn't want to say hello to her. They quickly took photos with George before they were saying goodbye.

George comes to stand next to her again, placing his hand back in hers and walking behind Matty into the shop.

He takes a step into the shop, door open, leaving Lou to still be out the door. They both hear the fans' words at the same time and she flinches as she sees the look on George's face.

"See you've moved onto George now... What a slag" one of them says as the others laugh meanly, it felt like she was back in high school. Although online comments hurt, she was quite good at distracting herself from it all, but in person was a whole new kettle of fish: it was completely unavoidable.

"G just leave it" she says, looking up at him silently begging him not to step back outside.

"They can't say shit like that to you" he says, voice loud enough for them to hear.

"It's fine G really. Let's just go inside" she says.

Matty hadn't noticed the two had stopped in the doorway so he proceeded to sit down with the other boys.

"What's going on with them?" Hann asks and Matty shrugs his shoulders.

"The fans probably wanted to say something else" Matty says, not knowing what had happened. If he did he would've been straight out there, telling them exactly what he thought of their mean words.

"Please G, drop it" she says, hearing them say more stuff behind them, things about how Matty's ex's were prettier than her, how she 'wasn't even that good' and how they could've got someone better to replace Carly.

He sees tears spring to her eyes and instantly steps into the threshold. He begins to say something to her as the door shuts but she interrupts him.

"I don't want to talk about it" she says as she moves to the table the guys are sitting at.

"Well I fucking do" George says, his voice raised, drawing all their attention to the lanky lad as he plonks himself down, arm wrapping round the back of her chair in defense, as if it would protect her. The waitress comes over and asks them what they'd  like to drink.

"Latte please" she says weakly. The waitress looks at George who doesn't meet her eyes, making her awkwardly walk away.

"Care to explain what's going on?" Ross says, getting completely ignored by the both of them. Matty's eyes flick between the both of them, utterly lost.

"You say you don't want to talk about it as if that's not the first time that's happened" George says, she can't look at him because she knows exactly how he'd look.

Pupils blown wide in anger, facial features furrowed  and the vein on his neck would be popping out. She knew the look all too well, having seen it on many occasions in the past, most of them when she had broken up with someone or someone had treated her badly: just like this occasion.

Matty looks at his best friend, seeing a look on his face that worried him, one which he rarely saw.

"What the hell are you two on about?" Matty then asks, and she looks at him, seeing how worried he looks, he sees the remnants of tears in her eyes and his hand quickly finds hers under the table, squeezing it tightly in his own. God she was thankful for him right now.

"Those fucking 'fans'" George says, fingers raising in the air to punctuate the word fans "said shit about Lou okay? And I get the impression it's not the first time"

They're all looking at her now, anger sketched across every single one of their features, even John looked angry and she didn't think that was possible. He was practically a walking marshmallow.

"It's not the first time and it won't be the last. Doesn't change anything" she says simply, trying not to get upset.

"Yes it fucking does" George says, his eyes softening as she flinches slightly, he places his arm on her shoulder, softly squeezing as if to say sorry.

"Alright George calm down, she doesn't need that right now" Matty says, usually that would be something Ross would say but she's so thankful it's him this time.

"Sorry I'm annoyed" he says, arms crossing as he huffs.

"We all are mate, but it's not exactly helpful is it?" Ross says.

"What have they been saying Lou?" Adam says, his words carefully spoken as not to press too much.

"Just silly comments about me being a slag. It's fine honestly"

"That is not fine" it's Matty who is talking now and she looks at him and frowns.

"Love they have no right saying shit like that" he then says, squeezing her hand again. The waitress brings over her coffee awkwardly, not wanting to disturb the heated discussion.

"There's nothing I can do about it. They think what they think and it's fine" she lies, eyes drifting down to her and Mattys intertwined hands, before looking at Matty, who was silently begging her to just tell the truth, sympathising with the fact she felt she had to lie to them.

"What did the ones out there say?" Ross points to the window, the people who were there now gone, which he's thankful for because he was one word from going out there and shouting at them.

"They said something about me moving onto George and then called me a slag" she says, looking down at her coffee cup, fiddling with the china.

"Moving on to G- Oh" Matty says, eyes finding hers again, eyebrows furrowing to say sorry, he shakes his head, letting her know she has nothing to say sorry for.

"I was just holding her hand" George explains, making the rest nod "That's why you needed that didn't you? You were worried they were going to say something" he asks and she nods at him.

"How long has this been happening?" John asks.

"A while...." She admits and in unison they all sigh.

"Love, why didn't you tell us? We would've-" Matty starts.

"Would've done what Matty? There's nothing you can do" she says, voice breaking slightly.

"We would've at least known Lou. We go through these things together, that's what family is'' Ross explains and she lets a rogue tear fall. She suddenly feels embarrassed that they're having this coffee in the middle of a random coffee shop (albeit an empty one with one waitress but still)

"I'm sorry" she says, her voice frail.

"You have nothing to be sorry about" Matty says, and she's the one squeezing his hand now.

"We will get through this together, if this happens again, you come to us and you tell us okay? Any one of us" Adam says and she nods.

They were a family after all.

They finish their drinks after that, they all stand from their chairs, slipping their jackets on.

"Think we're going to head back" Ross says and a few of the others nod. Matty and Lou share a look, explaining that they wanted to keep exploring and so they do. Ross is the first to pull her into a tight hug, only letting her go when her grip on him loosened. Adam is the next to squeeze her into his arms, his hand drifting along her back in a soothing motion.

George hugs her tightly next, whispering an "id kill anyone who would hurt you, you know that" and she smiles and nods as she pulls away. John gives a quick hug before they're all being ushered out by Matty, who secretly wanted nothing more to comfort her on his own now.

They continued walking along random paths, down streets that had little shops and stalls, popping into a few to see what they were selling.

At some point, Matty's hand brushes against hers and she grabs it, he looks down at their intertwined hands, a smile on his face.

"You sure?" He says, looking around to see if anyone was watching.

"We'll deal with the consequences together, yeah?" She asks and he nods, bringing their hands up to his mouth and pecking the surface of hers.

"Then I'm sure," she confirms. They walk around the rest of the day like that, eventually finding their way back to the hotel.

----------------------------------------------------------

They briefly wait outside the hotel, sharing a cigarette between them and sharing a few tight hugs, ones that let Lou know Matty had her. Before they're hiding away in their room because Matty can sense that she needs to be alone (with him of course).

She finds a comfortable position on his chest as his arms wrap around her, keeping her warm and safe. Usually listening to someone's heartbeat would make her anxious, something about the rhythm impacting her own, but she felt grateful to hear his. She felt like it made her know him more, it was intimate, hearing when it picked up or slowed down, when it skipped a beat: it was like his own symphony and she was just fascinated by it.

“I’m sorry I didn’t notice something was up” he says, frowning down at her, she simply shakes her head and presses a peck to his mouth, letting him know it was okay.

"Tell me what other people have said" he says softly, his fingertips flowing through her hair, the soft strands easily gliding in-between his fingers.

"I can't Matty it hurts too much" she admits now it's just them. She doesn't have to lie around him, or pretend she's fine when she's not. She can just be.

"I know love, I know. But talking about it might help" he says and she's turning in his arms then, looking over his features. He truly was a very handsome man, she never once questioned why fans fancied him so much. She lets out a deep sigh before she starts talking.

"Couple of people have said you guys could have hired someone better to replace Carly" he scoffs at that, placing a kiss against her cheek as he murmurs "there is no one better". One of the cracks in her heart heals at those words. She wants to tell him the one that hurts the most but she's scared: scared he'll confirm her worries, reject her thoughts and feelings (like so many had done previously).

She sighs deeply again, shutting her eyes as she says "someone... A few people actually… have said your ex's were prettier than me... Nicer... Better for you" she admits, her last admission is the one that destroys her. He's silent for way too long and her eyes snap open to see him.

She's rarely seen him look upset but God he looks upset now. His lips are set in a clear pout, the bottom one almost wavering as he sets his eyes over her features, his eyes almost glisten, he's not crying, but his eyes are like glass, tears almost threatening to spring.

"Lovie" he says, frowning down at her, she's trying to sense what he's thinking but falls short. What she would do to crawl inside his mind now.

"Want to know the truth?" He asks and she nods.

"Always" she says, partly worried she wouldn't like what he has to say.

"I compared every single one of them to you... It wasn't fair... Not on them because some, most of them were lovely. I never ever, not once, gave myself to someone fully... I looked for you in everyone. You made it pretty hard to be honest..." He admits laughing at his own confession and she doesn't know what to say. Another confession that shocks her to her core.

Her mouth opens before it's shutting again.

"It's okay, you don't have to say anything. Just know. Know that you, you are everything I have ever wanted and nothing came close to you. I'm never letting you go. You are living up to every single one of my expectations, superseding them even" he says. All she can do is press her mouth to his, letting him know everything she couldn't bring herself to say.

I love you, you're my person, no one has come close to you either, this is the best thing that has happened to me....

She knows one day she'll tell him but for now, she presses her lips to his, moving herself so her legs are resting either side of his body. His hands find her hips as his back leaves the bed, holding her against him as she straddles him.

She breaks away from him for a split second, removing her top, his eyes don't break from hers, not even to look at her chest which is now revealed. His stare is intense, one that would usually make her confidence falter, make her doubt herself, but now, basking in his light, she felt safe, seen. His stare tells her what he thinks of her, utterly obsessed and addicted.

He bridges the gap between their lips again, moving downwards after a few minutes of loving pecks. His lips find her neck, scattering loving kisses along the skin, just simple but firm pecks.

"You're beautiful" he says as he delivers a kiss to her collar bone. Hands drifting from her hips to her waist, taking his time with her, something that was yet to happen.

Everything so far between them had been rushed, each of them desperate to show each other their desire, their passion, their need for one another.

She wasn't scared this time, she was ready to have him in this way. To show each other they loved each other even if they couldn't bring themselves to say it.

His mouth finds the swell of her right breast, hovering over the warm flesh, lips coming down to press firm kisses to the skin. Her hands find the curls at the nape of his neck, playing with strands gently.

His breath is shallow, mind toying with the idea of undoing her jeans, but not wanting to rush the moment. She looks so perfect, sitting in his lap, her jean clad core flush against his. She felt him through her jeans, already solid and desperate for her.

"I'm so lucky" he murmurs against her chest as his hands find the clasp of her bra. His movements are far too slow for her liking, almost painfully so.

"Matty" she sighs as her bra finally comes undone, crumbling into his hands. He discards it somewhere unseen as his calloused fingertips toy with her flesh. His touch is gentle, barely there, but still manages to send shock waves of pleasure coursing through her entire body.

His fingertips delicately move across her nipples, making them pebble under his touch. She has never had anyone be this gentle with her before and it was the least she was expecting from a man like Matty. But he was always one to surprise her, everything she had learned about him so far had been a pleasant surprise, this perhaps her favourite of all. He would usually struggle to be this way with someone, but with her it almost came naturally to him, he needed, more than anything else, to show how how he truly felt.

"Want to take my time with you okay? Is that okay?" He asks, wanting them to be on the same page. She's nodding as he mouths at her skin, mouth wrapping around her nipple, sucking tenderly at the peaked bud. His lips move down in-between her breast, pressing against the necklace he gifted before reaching the other nipple, tongue teasing it gently. She can't help it as her hips rut against his at the amount of pleasure it causes her.

His hands move back down to her hips then and he's slowly lifting her, placing her onto the other side of the bed, back flush against the soft comforter.

Her hands find his shirt, lifting it over his head, revealing his tattooed chest. She stares at him from her place on their bed, how his thighs are parted, accommodating her small body, how the chest scattered with tattoos that she loves is clenching under touch, how he can't help but place his bottom lip in his teeth as he watches her.

Her eyes drift up to his face, his brown orbs almost perforating into her skin, clouded by something much greater than lust or desire: love. She can't count the amount of times he had changed his hair in the time she had known him, but this, this was her favourite, when the curls sat awry on his head, the grey strands drifting among the black, almost unnoticeable at a mere glance.

She was absolutely besotted with him and the fact didn't scare her anymore: she welcomed it.

Her lips are the ones to press against his skin now, dedicating a whole file in her mind to how he felt against her, how the centre of his chest dipped and how his waist curved inwards almost too much, reminiscent of the days in which he abused his body. He was healthier now and muscle had built up in the places where there once was only skin and bone. Even back then, through all the hate she found him beautiful, there was something about him that was unlike anyone she had ever met, but now she knows he is the most beautiful person both inside and out.

"You're beautiful Matty" she admits and the confession has him pulling her away from his chest, assaulting her lips in a passionate kiss. No one had ever used that word to describe him before and he found his heart jumped in his chest as he heard her say it.

His tongue moves against hers languidly, strong movements that have her eyes fluttering although already shut. Her small hands find his jaw, not wanting him to leave her mouth just yet, so he continues his ministrations, tongue curving around hers as sighs fall from one person to the other. She feels stubble under her fingertips and she smiles against his mouth, breaking them apart for a second.

He stares into her eyes, pupils blown wide matching her own. Their lips are both swollen, cheeks tinted red as they smile at each other.

His hands find the button of her jeans "may I?" He asks. "Please do" she says quietly.

He tugs them down her legs, careful not to be too aggressive with his actions. He wanted to show her how he truly felt about her, he needed to show her how grateful he was that she was here, with him. He knows she could have any guy in the world but she wanted him, he knew if he thought about that fact he's ego would inflate too much so he focuses on her.

He's quick to rid himself of his own jeans, making her chuckle before his body is resting above hers again.

He chuckles "sorry got a bit excited" he says making her giggle under him.

His mouth finds hers again in another round of passionate kissing. His hand drifts along her skin again, drifting along her now exposed thighs.

He hooks her right leg over his hip, flattening his core against hers, she sighs at this, mouth agape. It felt like every sense of hers was heightened, such a simple gesture making her see stars. He hadn't even properly touched her yet and she already felt on cloud nine.

"Matty, please touch me" she pleads, eyes finding the man above her. His features soften at her words, he doesn't say anything, simply lets his hand drift in between her thighs, meeting her underwear with the pads of his fingers.

One touch and she's moaning into his mouth, it was barely audible but he heard it. His fingers hook into her underwear pulling them down until she's revealed to him.

"So so beautiful" he murmurs, lips finding the shell of her ear.

His touch is feather light against her folds, carefully pressing up into her, making blissful sighs fall from her mouth, making sure he catches everyone with his own. She feels every ridge, every crease and indent in his fingers, the pads calloused from years of playing guitar. His fingers were rough in every sense of the word, a juxtaposition of how they were moving against her.

"So wet for me" he sighs.

He presses two fingers gently inside her, resisting the urge to press his own hips into hers at how she clenches around him. Airy gasps and moans are captured by his mouth.

"Matty" he would never tire of her saying his name. His cock pulses under the confines of his boxers, the way she's saying his name, like it's the only one she knows, it satisfies his deepest desires. He's curving his fingers up into her now, caressing the deepest parts of her, the spongy bundle of nerves being massaged with every deliberate trust.

"Matty" she sighs "I need you" she says and he groans into her.

"Don't worry I've got you, love" he says, knowing exactly what she needed because he needed the same thing. She helps him rid himself of his underwear, her hands wander in-between their bodies, grasping his hard member in her hands, he shakes his head, not needed the foreplay right now, he just needed her, desperately. He quickly finds his place back in-between her hips, leg hooking onto his hip as the tip of him threads through her cunt.

He slowly pushes all the way in, bottoming out as they sigh together. He holds himself there, deep inside her as she adjusts to the size of him, it wasn't their first time but it felt different like this, more intense. All she can do is grip him, making sure he doesn't move from her, she needs him here, close.

"My love.... Oh my love" he sighs against her ear, needing a minute to adjust as she clenches around him.

He places gentle kisses against her closed eyelids and they snap open as he draws his hips back slowly, pushing back in when the head of him reappears.

Their eyes never waver from each other, holding contact throughout. His movements are deep and meaningful, languid strokes of his hips sending his cock into places he had never reached before. His grunts are quiet, delivered into her ear so only she can hear.

His hand grips her bent knee at his hip, the angle forcing his cock into her sweet spot with every intentional thrust of his hips. Her mouth falls open against his chest, sighing into the skin, not wanting anyone to hear them. This moment was about them and them only.

Her mouth opens and then shuts, not able to speak with the amount of pleasure that was creeping its way up her spine.

He wants nothing more than to tell her he loves her but he's afraid she'll run away if he does. His pelvis is pressed against her clit with how deep he is and she's sighing into his mouth at the feeling.

She takes his hand in hers, pressing it against her abdomen " feel how deep you are Matty. No one has ever been this deep before" she groans. Her words have him almost cumming on the spot and his movements falter for a second, causing him to tip forward suddenly, sending him up and into her harshly, not the pace he wanted at the given moment. She gasps at the feeling regardless of whether he meant to or not.

"Keep saying stuff like that and I'll be done for" he says making her chuckle before the noise is replaced by a high pitched moan, his mouth pressing against hers to catch it.

This wasn't fucking, this was making love, their bodies telling each other everything they were too afraid to say.

A particular push forward of his hips accompanied by his fingers circling her clit has her sighing loudly, grasping his chin and forcing her lips against his. She didn't want anyone to hear this, this was a moment for just them, their own little secret.

"My beautiful darling girl" he grunts against her mouth.

"I lo-" he nearly says those words but her mouth presses firmly against his, not letting him say it just yet. He didn't need to because she already knew.

"I know" she says, nodding up at him, letting him know that she did too.

"Feel so good Matty" she sighs, his hips pulling out and pushing back in, her core convulsing around him, clenching against his girth as euphoria washed over her features. She was truly on cloud nine with him, everything else seeming to disappear.

"Fuck" he says, hips snapping forward a bit faster as he drew closer to his end.

Tears spring at her eyes as his hips pull back, snapping back in, the tip of him massaging her spot. Her eyes are closing as a tear falls, he’s kissing it away and her eyes open then. She had never felt Iike this before, not once had someone been able to make her feel this good. She was being loved the way she deserved.

"Matty" she sighs, back arching off the bed as her hands grip his back, pulling him closer if possible. His forehead rests against hers as he looks down at where they meet.

"Look how well you're taking me love. Fucking made for me" he says, her eyes snapping to where they're joined.

"Baby" she sighs. Her mouth hangs open, and he finds her eyes again, almost boring into her soul.

Euphoria takes over features and he knows she's close.

"Let go love" he says and that's all it takes. Her back arches even more off the bed and she all but sobs as a pleasure like she has never felt washes over her entire body. Her body spasms, her right hand resting against the pillows next to her head, he leans forward, grasping her hand in his.

"I've got you love, I've got you" he says, continuing his movements through her high. His mouth hangs open as his own high dawn's on him, he had never felt like this either. He had never really made love to someone before and he thought he'd feel vulnerable but with her, all he felt was loved.

"Oh god" he moans, hips spluttering forward as he reaches his own peak. He's cumming hard, harder than he thinks he ever has, long hot spurts of his cum coating her walls.

"So good" he says as their lips meet in one last passionate kiss. He pulls out of her, landing on his back next to her, completely high on everything that was her and this moment.

He pulls her to his chest, kissing her as she still comes down from her high.

"That was amazing" she sighs, completely fucked out. 

"You're amazing, thank you" he says and she smiles at him, pressing another kiss to his lips, simply not able to get enough.

"Thank you" she says. He gets up to clean them both off, checking if she needs anything before returning to her. They stare at each other for a while, stupidly happy smiles resting on their lips.

Lou eventually presses her cheek against Matty's bare chest, her fingertips trailing across the skin, down to his torso, light touches drifting along his collar bones, in between his pecs, along the centre of his abdomen, finally caressing the "we are kings" tattoo she has grown to love.

Matty was breathing lightly above her, post orgasm high still coursing through his body, his own fingertips playing with her hair, occasionally pressing kisses against the top of her head.

The scene was something they had both grown comfortable with now, they craved it all hours of the day: up on stage in front of thousands of people, just among their friends and especially when it was just the two of them.

He began humming something, something unrecognisable but unmistakably pretty.

"Sounds pretty" she says, her voice barely a whisper.

"Pretty?" He asks, moving the hair from her face so he could see her. She looks up at him from her place on his chest, nodding and smiling when his face crunches up, not liking her confession.

"Don't want our music to sound 'pretty' love" he admits.

"Well it does, so deal with it" she says, turning to get a better look at him. She places a kiss on his scrunched up nose.

She wriggles about for a bit, trying to get comfortable, he grunts above her as she stabs and pokes him as she moves.

He doesn't mind though, he'd go through hell just for her needs. She finally settles, palms flat against his chest, her legs resting in between his parted ones, her face resting against her hands and she can finally see all of his face: including his untamed curls that sit askew atop his head.

He likes this position, he can see her face too now, can see how her eyes sparkle as she looks at him and smiles. Despite the both of them being completely naked, neither felt vulnerable.

"'All I Need To Hear' is a pretty song.... So is inside your mind, this must be my dream, when we are together, about you ,Falling for you, tonight (I wish I was your boy) me and you together song " she says, listing songs of his she thought sounded pretty and he groans at that, making her laugh again.

"alright I get it love" he chuckles, cutting her off and making her laugh and she presses a kiss to his chest. 

"You're a pest you know that" he says and she nods up at him, smiling widely, making him smile too. His fingertips drift along her cheek, resting against her chin and pulling gently so she raises slightly. He presses his lips against hers then, making her sigh in bliss.

"You know you just listed several songs that were written about you" he says, making her shoot up to look at him.

"You can't tell me that," she says, making him laugh. She lies back down on his chest.

"Is my whole life a lie?" She says dramatically (on purpose) making him laugh and place more kisses against her lips.

"Tell me you love me" he murmurs against her lips, she wants nothing more than to break away and talk about his words but she can't bring herself  to do so quite yet. So she allows him to keep pressing gentle kisses to her lips, getting carried away when he starts to press firmer ones, ones where his tongue peeks through his lips and presses against hers. After what had just happened she supposed it needed to be said. She feels him pull her away and her eyes open to find him.

"Tell me you love me" he repeats, his voice barely audible in the large hotel room. She thinks she knows him quite well now, and she thinks she knows why he's asking her.

"Can't seem to bring yourself to say it first?" She asks, whispering back at him. He's scared, although he has no reason to be.

"If I tell you that..." He begins but his voice trails off. He was truly scared that if he opened his heart in that way, she would reject him, or things would go wrong, afraid he'd lose her.

"Matty" she says, and his eyes shut, not wanting to look at her. One look and he'd be spilling his heart out.

"Matty, baby look at me" she says firmly making his eyes drift open to look at her again.

"You know you're not going to lose me right? Especially after what just happened" She says and he nods hesitantly.

"Matty, I'm not going anywhere. Not now, not ever. You're stuck with me now I'm afraid" she says. He simply leans down to kiss her again. The kiss is more passionate than the last one they shared.

"I love you sweetheart" he says as he pulls away, his eyes are tearing up slightly and she smiles a soft smile at him.

"I know Matty, I know. I love you too, more than anything" she admits before pressing her lips to his again.  She goes to pull away but he lightly pulls her forward by the necklace that rests around her neck, the necklace he got her, the necklace that proves to the both of them that he's hers and she is his.

"Not ready for you to leave quite yet" he mumbles against her lips.

"Okay Matty" she smiles against his mouth.

They cuddle after that, Matty is the little spoon for a while before he's turning them, insisting on "wrapping the woman he loved" as he so blatantly put it, up in his arms.

He's repeating the three words throughout the night, some of them she heard, some of them she didn't (having fallen asleep in his arms) but that was okay. He had years of catching up to do, might as well get a head start he thought.

They were truly insatiable, waking every few hours and making love, various I love you's falling into the empty room. Each time seemed to be more intense than the last, until both of them are nearly crying into each other. They laughed with each other about how pathetic it was, but they were happy. The happiest either of them had ever been.

Part 8

Note: hope everyone liked this chapter, please let me know what you think and what you want to see... Even if it's not something directly linked to the story, could just be a Matty x Lou concept... Also help everyone is doing okay despite everything. Remember I love you

#matty healy #matty healy x reader #matty healy smut #matty healy fan fic #matty the 1975 #matty healy fanfiction #matty healy fic #matty healy fluff #matty healy imagine #matty healy x ofc #matty healy x oc #insufferable arsehole matty healy series #the 1975 fanfic #the 1975 fic #the 1975 smut #matty healy series #the 1975 #m

[eichisnewgroove]

i was saying this to @xenospects but one of the big reasons behind why eichi "can never get bored of wataru" is because he has no idea how to copy him. eichi is used to basically just being able to acquire any skill he admires. in circus he teaches himself how to do challenging circus performances without having to do much actual practice by obsessively watching videos of how they're done, carefully memorizing the details, and doing them over and over and over and over in his mind so when he is able to physically practice he's already done the bulk of the mental work. in milky way, after shu really rattles him and bests fine, eichi sits on the rooftop going over everything shu did in his head, deconstructing it, learning it. he can't mimic the process of shu's creativity (which is why he's jealous of him) but he can learn to execute the kind of routine shu can come up with. he talks about this with tori in dance time as well. eichi isn't "creative" but in terms of acquiring skills he's confident that anything he puts his mind to he can learn to do. he's always drawn toward people who can do what he can't do, like leo and his ability to compose music, but he can still learn to play leo's songs.

and that's where wataru's tricks become limitlessly fascinating to him. wataru isn’t just a genius, he's highly specialized in a way that completely fuses his genius with his execution. his tricks are unique, advanced, and mechanically complex. eichi frequently complains that no matter how much he thinks about it he can't figure out how wataru does his tricks. wataru's physical skills are also really difficult to replicate; even the twins who have been pulling off complex physical performances since they were children find it difficult to keep up with him. wataru is complex on every level: his execution is so flawless that it leaves even eichi, who is extremely attentive and scrutinous, and actively trying to figure out the mechanics, completely clueless as to how he pulls things off. second, his methods are very advanced and complex, so even if he were to explain it it may be too difficult to understand. third, the skills wataru has and makes use of to pull off the tricks are also very complex, difficult to understand, and difficult to replicate even by other geniuses and experts.

wataru's magic is something eichi would never be able to do. trying to make sense of how wataru does it is a fun but ultimately futile exercise, and this really frustrates him but also keeps him forever enchanted and intrigued. this is why when wataru tells him in diner live, it's not real magic, it's all sleight of hand, eichi says, well i have no idea how you do it, so to me it's the same as real magic. eichi isn't just a regular fan who can't figure out wataru's tricks; he's the kind of person who can normally figure out how anything works. imagine his shock the first time he saw wataru do magic as part of one of his shows broadcast to the TVs, when after rewinding it several times, looking up special effects, watching hours of magic how-to tutorials trying to figure out how the hell wataru did it or at least get a hint, he was still completely stumped. but that's the kind of person eichi is and the kind of effort he'd go through to make sense of it.

what balances out eichi's frustration with and jealousy of wataru is wataru's kindness. wataru is truly, to the bone, everything eichi idealizes in an entertainer. he has a loving heart and doesn't look down on his audience but wishes to please them. he smiles at eichi when eichi feels completely useless, and it's not a pitying smile but a genuine one. for all of his show offy antics, wataru is very much not all about himself. he's genuinely interested in and attentive to the happiness of his audience, and once eichi has his attention, he turns that impossible talent directly into making eichi smile. for all of his frustration and jealousy it's impossible for eichi not to love wataru, and his respect for wataru as an artist is unparalleled. eichi finds himself thoroughly enchanted by him because wataru has something so unique to offer the world both in terms of what he can do and the kind of person he is.

that's why wataru will never stop surprising him. that's why eichi will never get bored of him. wataru is everything eichi finds loveable in the world and he inspires eichi to think of others, like tori, who admire eichu for what he can do, and to hone in on his own uniqueness he has to offer to the world. even if it's "not real" like the geniuses he admires, it may still be magic to someone he loves and wants to inspire.

#analysis #eichi tenshouin #wataru hibiki #eiwata #wataei #eichi #wataru #ink spills

[bread-tab]

"stop making [media] your whole personality"

ah... okay. yes. so.

first off:

there's this neurodivergent thing, where you use an interest as a filter for processing the world.

for some people that is called a "special interest," for others with different needs it is more of a "hyperfixation;" there are far more variations than i (or the field of psychology) know how to describe now. if you want to understand the difference there are people who can explain those variations better than me. but i can tell you what it feels like.

you discover something.

it doesn't matter what it is; you find something that speaks to you, something you can connect to, and it becomes a bubble of safe habitat from which you can rest from and explore and connect to all the other parts of this strange chaotic world.

a source of joy. a source of illumination.

it's like you're a person who has lived all their life in dark caves and you find something that glows.

these interests can be anything.

(literally anything; i personally derive meanings that you could never imagine from ✨ drainage ditches. ✨)

but very often, they are stories. tv shows, books, movies, comics, songs, podcasts, minecraft improv streams, cartoons, web serials, whatever

these things are:

tangible. you can hold them in your hands, replay them, turn on the subtitles, take screenshots, read the sheet music

and yet

real. they form a genuine connection from your (isolated, untranslatable) internal world to other (formerly unknowable) people and the rest of the universe

they create meaningfulness

and they exist because humans find these incredibly effective soul-deep ways of communicating to one another.

now, appreciating stories, that's not a neurodivergent thing. that's a human thing.

the point of relevance here is that experiencing an extreme love for stories is a neurodivergent thing.

it's a very common neurodivergent trait which often gets mocked, portrayed as childish, and used as a pretext for infantilization and bullying.

(and it is also a trait of young people in general, to take stories very seriously in a way that looks silly to adults, and that is something that many people (regardless of age) try to bully out of each other.

what good is that doing anyone?)

"stop making [x] your whole personality"

listen, you. get down off that goddamn embankment and climb down into this ditch with me. dip your toes in this oily water. watch the stars and city lights ripple into constellations you've never seen

now look me in the eye

you need to understand that no matter what lowbrow, cringey, problematic or otherwise not-to-your-tastes drivel you might be complaining about today,

you are talking about the phenomenon of creativity

you are talking about a transcendent catalyst of human emotion

and yes that includes the overmilked disney franchises, it includes the formulaic shippy fanfictions, it includes whatever brightly-colored cartoon this website is obsessed with this year (and will be having incredibly dramatic meltdowns over next year), it includes the cheesy action movies and the fanservicey anime and the badly-designed video games and the milquetoast tiktok "literature", it includes the indistinguishable scribbles of some random five-year-old and/or famous fine artist and/or precocious elephant

i get it. you care about real life and touching grass and shit. you have taste. just take the stilts off your horse for a second, okay?

i know you're probably sick of "let people like things" discourse

i would just like for you to stop for a second and take a deep breath, and let the stench of whatever is in this mud puddle wash over you (yeah i know, ew, but you'll be fine) and consider

what is so bad about having a cringey personality, anyway?

and maybe you will think better of making "stop making [some silly moment in the universe] your personality" into your personality and maybe you will come off as a little bit less of a snob/ableist/ass and maybe you will have a slightly better outlook on life among humans.

that's all. yeah you can get out of the gutter now. thank you for coming to my ted talk—

ooh wait, look, a bottle cap

#''let people like things'' is not enough #let people find joy in the mundane stupid shit of life goddamn you #rant #*waves hands inarticulately* your sprouts! #protect your sprouts #idk if i'm making sense #i failed literature 101 three times for this #fuck it #maybe this is the semester i go back and pass that goddamn class #long post #actuallyautistic #adhd feels #neurodivergent breadtab #ableism #and that thing i don't know what to call it #where the intellectuals and the anti-intellectuals are fighting and it makes my head hurt because they're both missing part of the picture #and for me that part whatever it is it's foundational #sleep deprived #i have more to say about drainage btw #unfortunately it's more of a ''rotating in my mind'' kind of interest so it might not #make sense #per se #however i could probably get more poetic about this considering the thing I'm rotating in my mind is the sum and substance of how #humanity intersects with the water cycle of the entire earth #in summary: woder

[mazeinthemiroh]

Hello can I request a stray kids with there s/o being a stylist !

( imagin one of them getting jealous on how close there s/o is to a other idols face when doing there makeup >-<)

stray kids with a stylist s/o

genre: fluff

word count: 0.9k

warnings: not proofread

pls like and reblog if you enjoy! feel free to request anything <3

bangchan

channie just loves the way you do his makeup. like he really feels only you bring out his best features. you make him feel confident in himself when he is performing because you give him outfits that not only are flattering but also that he feels comfortable in. even when you're not styling him, he might ask for fashion tips or your opinion on his outfit anyway. what makes channie super happy though is that you always remember to compliment his handsome face whether he is wearing makeup or not, knowing that he's insecure about his bareface. this makes his heart flutter for sure <3

lee know

minho loves the perks there are in having a partner who is a stylist. you have a good eye for things so he comes to you for free fashion advice and stuff like that. what he isn't too keen on is when you are styling other idols. he knows it's part of your job but when he catches glimpse of you leaned over another idol to do their makeup, he can't help but feel a little jealous. even if the other idols you are styling happen to be his members! why should they be worth more attention than him? that's where his mind is at. so be sure to pamper him and give him special treatment uwu

changbin

he loves the fact that you are mostly there backstage whenever he has a concert or special event. he feels like he can get positive vibes and support just by knowing you're not too far from him. he loves it when you take care of him, especially in between performances at concerts. while adjusting his make-up and outfit, you'll wipe his sweaty forehead and always ask him if he's ok and if he needs anything. you mkar him feel so loved and care for no matter what setting or circumstance. he likes to think that you take care of him at work and he get's to take care of you at home >.< idk the whole scenario is just very cute to him.

hyunjin

he admires your work because to him being a stylist is like being an artist; you have your own creative process and speculate on how to make things look beautiful or make outfits look unique for performances. he always claims that every time you style him, you give him the most iconic looks. whether that is giving him a new hairstyle or vibrant, intricate makeup on his face, or even a new style of clothes that has never been tried by an idol before. he likes making a good impression on the fans and being known as striking and daring, so having you by his side to support this idea is a dream come true for him.

han

he finds it quite a novle idea that he would be connected to his partner this way. he still finds it funny how he could ask about different clothes and hairstyles that you would be willing to try out in him while you talk long into the night. having you in his work aspect of life is something he is still getting used to, but definitely something he very much appreciates. just knowing you are there, even jn the backgrounds of the dressing room somewhere, even if you're styling another idol, he knows you're there. and that's the main thing. he feels he has someone to turn to just incase something happens. he is very comforted by you.

felix

every time you get the opportunity to do his makeup for an event, you also make sure his beautiful freckles are visible, which he really appreciates. as felix's stylist and partner you feel that you tend to focus more on complimenting his personality and talents than looks. this is because felix has expressed to you that he doesn't want to just be known for his handsome face, and you completely understand that. as someone who is constantly around handsome faces anyway, you tend to be unfazed with regards to looks, and so you reassure him that his personality shines the brightest <333

seungmin

before he started dating you, seungmin was super shy when you came over to style him, and this was mainly because you could not stop yourself from complimenting how handsome he is. i mean... i can't blame you?? i would totally do the same lmao. anyways, now that you both are dating he's a lot less shy because he's used to being around you a lot more, not just at work but also in a less professional setting, like when you guys at home. but you still make his heart flutter regardless; he's just not used to getting so much attention from just one person. it's a new feeling, and a feeling he likes very much indeed.

jeongin

you are able to shield jeongin from any awful hairstyles that other stylists attempt to infringe upon him. like the amount of times other stylists have come at him with hair crimpers is appalling and definitely not happening, not if you have any say in it! he definitely appreciates you understanding his wishes, for sure. when he sees you styling other idols, he can feel himself getting more and more jealous. he's just lowkey insecure, especially if he deems the idol you are so close to as being 'more handsome' than he is. but he will never mention it to you because he recognises that you are a professional and this is merely what you're paid for.

#stray kids #skz #bang chan #bangchan #chan #seo changbin #changbin #felix #lee felix #lee minho #lee know #seungmin #kim seungmin #jeongin #yang jeongin #hyunjin #hwang hyunjin #han #han jisung #stray kids fluff #stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #stray kids reactions #stray kids x reader #skz imagines #skz fluff #skz scenarios #skz x reader #kpop fluff #kpop

[tediousdelusion]

the absolutely most chaotic modern steddy hands au i can imagine is established couple ed and izzy with recently out divorce attorney stede.

like, izzy and ed got married young. maybe because they were drunk in vegas. maybe for the spousal immunity since they are and always have been involved in some less than reputable dealings. but they aren't exactly a "real" married couple in their own minds even tho they live together and their lives are needlessly intermingled.

ed is going through his midlife crisis. he's unhappy, wants to find out that there's more to life. and izzy is done with his shit after the most recent flight of fancy. because i love irony, i think that he buys a boat and comes up with some flimsy justification for why he needs it for "business purposes."

and so izzy threatens divorce, like he has a million times. and ed doesn't buy it because izzy is all talk. but izzy is serious this time - or at least he wants ed to think he's serious - and so he goes and hires a lawyer. not some bus stop lawyer either, no. he wants the real deal and his name is on the joint account, dammit, so ed's money can pay for it too.

enter stede bonnet, divorce attorney at law.

stede is from one of those old legal families. his father was a lawyer and his grandfather was a lawyer and his great-grandfather was... well, you get it. and stede doesn't really want to be a lawyer, but he doesn't have much choice in the matter. his biggest rebellion is practicing family law instead of becoming in house counsel for an investment bank.

for forty-odd years he plays the part of the good son, well after his father is dead. marries the girl he is supposed to, has two kids, a nice house, a steady job. and sure, he's never really happy happy, but he's a divorce attorney! every day he sees marriages so much worse than his own that he figures what he and mary have must be the best a person could hope for.

until woops! actually, no! his marriage is just as bad as half his clients' and now he's going through this whole process himself and oh, yes, on top of it all, he just realized that he's gay!

so between chauffeuring the kids, reading about all the gay culture he's missed in the past four decades, and catching up on his other cases, he ends up meeting one izzy hands. sad case, stede hates to see the end of a long marriage, but it seems easy enough.

except things aren't easy at all because 1) izzy and ed don't actually want to get divorced and 2) stede is starting to fall for ed, izzy's enigmatic and charming husband.

ed is falling for stede, too. of course he is! stede is interesting and new - he comes from this old family tradition that ed's never seen before, but he's also creative and witty and fascinated by ed. and so ed takes it upon himself to help introduce stede to gay culture, preferably by a hands on demonstration.

izzy knows what's going on. of course he does. he's seen ed take interest in someone before, knows what it looks like. but what he doesn't like is that stede is starting to return his interest. stede is izzy's fucking lawyer. if anyone should get to fuck him, it should be izzy.

cue a series of rom-com style hijinks where ed and izzy are both trying to seduce stede, stede is trying to save izzy and ed's marriage, and all three of them think they know what the others want. for more angst and more comedy, you can throw in some actual ethical rules, like how lawyers aren't supposed to start fucking their clients. (there's also a lot of conflict of interest here but shhhhhhhh)

of course, this ends in a throuple. exactly how could go a few ways. maybe izzy walks in on ed and stede and stede is waiting to be fired, but izzy just loosens his tie and joins them in bed. maybe they make it all the way to the first court appearance and when the judge asks if they really want the divorce they're like, nah. he's shagging the lawyer but i guess i want to be fucking him too. maybe stede forces them all to go to lucius sponsored couples counseling and they get perma-banned when they start making out on the couch.

anyway, no matter how it happens, i think stede quits divorce work to become izzy and ed's criminal defense attorney and they all have a long and morally bankrupt good time together

#steddy hands #steddyhands #is it one word or two??? #izzy hands #i just think it would be funny your honor #ofmd #our flag means death #trying out just posting ideas that i wont actually execute #bonus points if izzy and stede actually meet before izzy hires him #like stede fucks up his car or smth and izzy meets him at the side of the road and is a real dick about it #and then shows up at the office like 45 min later to hire stede #the revenge crew all works for the firm in this #in varying roles #like i think that jim would be the pi #oluwande is the paralegal #roach runs the cafe in the building #frenchie would be better at the front desk but buttons would be so much funnier #ed this whole time is just making stede's job harder but more fun #stede: i am representing your husband in the divorce and i need to go over some papers with you #ed: okay i will meet with you but only at 8pm at a queer bar

[romance-club-daily]

A little bit late, but I'm gonna jump in on the recent "RC uses AI art" bandwagon. I understand where you're coming from — I'm an aspiring translator and even before the whole AI craze I had no idea how tf I'm gonna look for a job once I'd graduate, but now the situation's even more dire. That being said, I think we really really REALLY shouldn't jump to conclusions about in this case because

do we actually have any proof that it's AI generated art besides "it looks like that"? Because AI... doesn't really have a "style", it's literally gonna look like the art you feed to it/what it finds on the web. I've already seen at least one instance of artists being told that their art is actually AI generated just because it looks similiar. CGs in all stories are usually more realistic-looking, imo, and showcase the biggest differences between different artists' styles. All of this is speculation is conjecture, but like, so is the whole thing about RC using AI art in the first place. So I'll just move on to more solid argument

just last month, on August 4th, RC announced an open call for hiring artists. I guess this vacancy was targeted at CIS countries since as far as I'm aware they didn't crosspost it to Facebook or Twitter or anywhere besides VK and Telegram channel. On 28th they stopped accepting applications from artists and are, most likely, currently continuing the tryouts. My point is: what kind of company would resort to using free AI and then go and hire real humans you actually have to pay? It just doesn't make sense

Here is my translation of these posts about the whole hiring business and screenshots. I'll send you links via another submission or ask because I'm afraid tumblr might nuke this one

translation, if anyone knows russian and thinks I made a mistake of some sort feel free to correct me, after all there's a lot of artist argot I'm not too sure about:

august 4th:

2D artist vacancy

Friends, we announce that we started hiring artists to Romance Club team. ❤

We're YSI, an independent game development sudio from Moldova, that creates interactive visual novels. We're looking for people who may become a part of our big family.

If you're a talented character and/or game locations 2D artist (or you're just great at drawing), then you're exactly who we're looking for!

✅ What do we want from the applicants?

- creativity and rich imagination;

- to be professionaly versed in 2D graphics softwares (experience with Adobe Photoshop is necessary);

- to be able to draw by hand using a graphic tablet;

- your portfolio is necessary.

❗All of the applicants will be given a test assignment❗

✅ Why you should choose Romance Club:

- friendly young team as well as modern office in the capital of Moldova;

- to work with experienced professionals in informal and inspiring environment;

- opportunity to realize your own creative ideas;

- exciting long-term projects;

- fair wage + bonuses;

- possible career development;

- game dev is cool!

If you're interested, send us your portfolio at jobs @ yourstoryinteractive. com and briefly tell us about your skills

August 28th:

2D artist vacancy, applications closed

Friends, we finished the hiring process for artists❗

Huge thanks to those who sent us their resume. Everyone turned out to be incredibly talented and interesting.

✅ Candidates that received an e-mail from us move on to the next stage of tryouts

Our apologies for not being able to reply to everyone personally. We received a great deal of applications and, unfortunately, couldn't possibly contact everybody.

Thank you for showing interest in Romance Club and working for our company!

With all due respect,

Your Story Interactive

As a side note, it is possible that some of the artists may use AI without their hire-ups and writers and so on even knowing that — unlikely, I don't have any proof of that, but it's a possibility. But I feel that the only thing we're doing here is treading muddy waters of conspiracy theories. I'm repeating myself, but it just seems unlikely that there's actually any AI involved when the company in question just started hiring new artists. You may argue that they had to use AI for the most recent update because of the staff shortage but once again: let's not dive into conspiracy theories. Okay, I took longer than I needed to, but I rest my case

_____________________________________________________________

I agree with you on some points, it could be the artist using it without the company knowing and it is a possibility (although I think would be naive of them). But I believe that hiring artists and using AI is something that can happen simultaneously, in the beginning. One thing may not have to do with the other either. That said, it has caught our attention because the style has changed drastically from one update to the next and is very similar to how AI-generated images look. The public used to complain that the characters didn't have realistic poses and out of nowhere they change some to something ultra-realistic (without being able to see a real evolution until reaching this point), almost like a painting which happens to be very similar to how the AI works with images. It's something to be suspicious of, we shouldn't straight accuse them, but being suspicious and sharing our distrust is valid, given that many companies have recently been doing this. And if an employee is using AI and they know about it, It has to be approved by someone at the company, and it carries the company name. I don't think they're that naive (an artist's style changes suddenly and no one wonders why).

Since when they see that using AI is cheaper (or costs almost nothing) and it's fast, they have to make a decision, ethical or not.

Let's see what will happen, but I hope for a good outcome! I love RC stories and would be shame if they go for this path.

And of course, this is absolutely my opinion on this, you can agree or not and that's ok for me.

#submission #romance club #romance club game #ask answered #ask anon #ask anonymous

[ralexsol]

Thank you for being the only reasonable person I've seen in this godsforsaken fandom

I think a lot of people are reasonably upset, but are taking a somewhat harmful approach to making things better.

It's difficult to see a show with such openly queer characters and not your own demographic (poc, disabled, women). They think that they should have a place there too, which they should! But you have to consider situations in part of a bigger picture of where we're at as a society.

Right now, the queer community has a lot of attention, and it's easier for pretty much all people to take a walk in their shoes. "I'm a man who loves women, you're a woman who loves women. Well, the only thing that's different is who exactly you love, but you still love, so I don't have a hard time imagining your circumstances."

And while poc have been crying out for attention for years now, most notably in 2020 with the BLM movement, it's much harder for a white man to imagine the experience of a black woman. And considering that if you do it wrong you're canceled, it's easy to see why people shy away from it. People say, "Oh, it's just a person! Act normal!", and yes that is true, but the white man may still accidentally perpetrate a stereotype. And then he's yelled at for not doing research first. It's a cycle that people can get stuck in.

As for physically disabled people, depictions of them are so stigmatized in media at this point that it's hard to know right from wrong. There are going to be mistakes made. That doesn't make it totally okay, but progress is a process. Disabled people have been silenced for a very long time, and they deserve a hell of a lot better. But if we just tell the Council to include them, how are the Council to know exactly what that looks like? We need to give them ideas, we have to guide them.

And as for women, yeah, there's definitely a lot to be desired. Frankly, they're a bunch of white guys; it's bound to happen. What we can do is clamor for more women who aren't only milfs. Yes, we love them, but regular, strong ladies like Jay are needed all throughout the campaigns. Give Jay some love. She's amazing. Condi does great with her.

The JRWI community has the unique position of being able to actually influence the creators. While Disney artists and writers are hidden away behind a big corporation and continue to pump out the same white, straight, cisgendered characters, we have one on one contact with the Council.

Tell me: if you went up to a Disney executive and screamed at them to include a black ambiguously bisexual or lesbian woman in one of their movies, do you think that would help the issue? No, they wouldn't care. They'd just say you're trying to brainwash their children again.

Meanwhile, the Council are a small group of four white, mostly cisgendered and straight men. And yet, they've included gay, lesbian, bisexual, nonbinary, unlabeled, asexual, transgender, and black people! That's awesome! We should be celebrating the fact that this podcast even exists! It's incredible.

Don't scream at them. That's counter-productive. Have civil conversations, encourage them to do more, show them what representation should look like while giving them room to be creative with it. Tell them what they do wrong and then point them kindly in the right direction.

I don't want this community to kill the podcast. I don't want all of this negativity to force Grizzly to leave - and I think it could get to that point if things continue the way they do.

Art is the best way to influence the Council. Draw the pcs with mobility aids! Give the poc characters love and attention, expand on hcs. Make ocs that showcase aspects of these lesser-represented communities. There are so many things you can do.

#jrwi #rrays answers #ive been wanting to talk about all this #guess now's the time #i just hope i dont dramatically offend anyone #i think a lot of people need to go touch some grass and remember the state of the real world #and how lucky we are to have a show like jrwi #with creators who are willing to listen and change their behaviors

[carolingarts]

I just saw a post about how Henry is the "Original" creator of Bendy when canon says Joey and I think it's a fascinating opportunity to discuss Ub Iwerks and Walt Disney so *Let's Go* and if I get any facts wrong please feel free to add or subtract!

History is full of pairings like Henry and Joey (the closest ones obviously being Henry and William Afton - ha. see I got jokes) but the notion of a collaborative creative process that isn't instantly *seen* is something I find interesting. So much work today is dissected and arguments can be brought to social media extremely easily. It's re-defined the creative process.

Ub Iwerks and Walt Disney were the best of friends who worked on Walt's 'Laugh o' grams' before Mickey Mouse. When Walt wanted to move into shorts production and took Ub with him. The two of them went to work for Universal with Walt asking for Ub to come up with the *image* of Oswald the Lucky Rabbit while coming up with his personality.

So that's Oswald - Walt's ideas and Ub's work (His dreams, my effort) which doesn't mean that Oswald and by proxy Mickey Mouse aren't part of Ub Iwerks's work (in fact it's fucking criminal and if you like Bendy and you don't know who Ub Iwerks is go look him up in Henry Stein's name ok.)

Oswald is really interesting because Universal and Pat Powers tricked Walt into a contract that they owned total and complete rights to Oswald the Lucky Rabbit and Pat Powers - Walt's contact with Universal - announced that he had also hired away Walt's animators without them - or him - letting him know.

I remember in reading "Walt Disney: An American Original" a great story about how Walt and Ub came up with Mickey while they were still with Universal and managed to convince animators that were still "loyal" to Walt to draw the Mickey cartoon underneath their Oswald sketches while they waited their contract out. So imagine a bunch of dudes literally grabbing animation work and then hiding it when Universal supervisors came around.

From the Link I posted below:

[MARTIN: When the Laugh-O-Gram Studio eventually went bankrupt, Disney took a train out to Hollywood. But not very much time had passed before he was begging Iwerks to come out too. He couldn't make his cartoons' success without him.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

MARTIN: And that was where, in 1928, Ub Iwerks single-handedly animated "Plane Crazy," the first Mickey Mouse cartoon. After a record 700 drawings a day, Iwerks did in two weeks something that would have taken other animators months. ]

(JFC. If we can assume that Joey asked for Henry to do something like that and Henry did it the man is a fucking *machine*)

The rest of the story is - pretty much what we've gathered from Bendy canon unless the Meatly says otherwise. Ub ended up chafing under Walt's leadership, left the studio for 10 years and produced some pretty cool Looney Tunes cartoons even if his own studio folded. He rejoined the studio doing animation, special effects, and themepark design even winning an award for his work on "The Birds" (yes that birds, the Hitchcock Birds.)

Obviously Bendy is a story, but the real life stories about this kind of stuff are three times as interesting IMHO.

This is the most abridged version of the story *ever* and I'm sure I'm getting some facts wrong but I think both Ub and Walt would be the first people to say "we worked on Mickey together" as well as Oswald. A collaborative effort. Most creative efforts that are put in the spotlight are when things are negative and you have to really make the effort to say that it *was* the product of two people.

So it's *really interesting* that people are arguing over these two fictional characters and that Henry deserves just as much credit as Joey *especially* given that people are asking for Ub Iwerks to get more credit relating to Mickey Mouse.

There was a thread I remember reading on twitter (I wish I could find it) where an animator was talking about how in a Mickey Mouse short they were able to use a picture of Walt Disney for a joke for the first time - and how much of a shock it was. That's because Walt and Mickey are *sacrosanct*. You don't fuck with the image of Walt or the image of Mickey Mouse.

Think about it. TWDC has literally lobbied to *rewrite the copyright codes of the United States of America to protect Mickey Mouse*.

I like to say that if Walt had done what he did in the modern era or if social media had existed in the 30s he would have been like one of the big youtubers. He has an *image* that was carefully crafted - and Ub helped him design it! He was the one who said he should go by Walt Disney.

There's another quote in an American Original where Walt's like "I've kind of ceased to be Walt Disney. Walt Disney is someone else." And that's what successful branding *is*. Disney doesn't eat or yell or scare the hell out of his employees - Walt would bring cans of chili to other countries so he'd have something to eat and scare the hell out of his animators. He and Ub just butted heads then got back together and Ub helped us build themepark rides (think that Henry would give Piedmont a run for his money?)

You also have to keep in mind that even if the books *aren't* canon, Sammy was probably there pretty early and writing "The Lighter side of Hell." You can't forget the contributions of our favorite musical composer.

Any good creative project is a team effort and I'd like to think that Henry animated Bendy, Joey sold him, then they brought in Sammy who added more character. After all - Sammy technically (if they books are canon) mentions Alice and that the cartoons "need a girl."

So basically while Joey is twice as much of a bastard for totally breaking all his employees mentally - we have to give creative credit where it's due. Bendy was drawn by Henry, thought up by Joey, given a voice by Sammy (though I'd like to imagine Joey voiced him.) and then put into a world by the rest of the team.

Anyway, if people are going to have this argument I think it's important to draw from history - namely Ub and Walt and how the two *did work together* and apply it to Mickey Mouse and Oswald as well as our favorite Lil' Devil Darlin'. Again, history is full of partnerships like Henry and Joey and if you aren't careful you're going to forget one in favor of the other.

(I mean at least Walt didn't experiment on his employees outside of maybe asking them to ride rides or watch cartoons before everybody else)... As for Bendy tho.

This link above says it best, "Mickey is the Child of 2 Dads."

So's Bendy!

Joey's just the Disneyland dad and shitty parent and Henry's the one who'd probably be making sure Bendy and the crew would be eating and doing their homework before reading them to sleep.

That said, in reading the link, you should also make yourself *aware* of Ub Iwerks because he doesn't get nearly enough credit and Mickey being a team effort I think - in a world where people only bring attention to the negative aspects of creative partnerships - is important for people to know.

Let me close with my favorite Oswald animatic because it includes both Ub and Walt and Oswald and Mickey and it's inspired by Epic Mickey and it's just great.

#Walt Disney #Ub Iwerks #Oswald the Lucky Rabbit #Mickey Mouse #Disneyland #Disney #Bendy and the Ink Machine #BATIM #Bendy and the Dark Revival #Henry Stein #Joey Drew #Joey drew studios #Youtube

[aashi-heartfilia]

Star Dress Combo #01: Mini Series Begins!

Let's do it!

So, welcome all to my mini series where I rank every SD and SDC based on their appearance, power and significance in the story. So without further ado, let's jump straight into it!

The first Star Dress Combo (SDC) on our list is LeoXVirgo.

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Appearance

My first reaction to this Star Dress was pretty meh and honestly, I'm still not a big fan of it. I know, I might be one of those few people in our fandom, but I just don't like it. Leo is very Queenly and Virgo is literally a maid so what LeoXVirgo gives us is pretty much fitting with its theme but the dress itself with all it's jewellery and frills and the apron isn't just doing for me.

And what are those wings for? Can she fly?

It's might be a controversial opinion but I think it could have been better. More creativity and thought process could have been applied to it but keeping my personal preferences aside and taking the fandom into account, this is my final rating.

Appearance: 8/10

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Now let's move on to the best part:

Power (DPS)

Just look at the damage it does! After Urano Metria, it's arguably the most powerful move in Lucy's arsenal and that's one thing for sure! I'm not counting AquariusxGemini here cause she can hold it for merely 16 seconds but more on that later.

The biggest nitpick however, I have with this SDC or probably all SDC in general is that it has only one single move! You would think that a SDC with such high DPS should at least have something better to offer, especially when we know how versatile and dynamic both Leo and Virgo SD are.

But no, we get one OP OHKO Move, which we thought was very badass until Kiria rendered it completely useless in the 'Battle between Women' when she cut through her Lion Maiden like it was nothing.

DPS: 9/10

Not as powerful as Natsu's Fire Dragon Demolition fist but OP nevertheless.

Versatility: 2/10

Just one OP move combining Virgo and Leo's powers doesn't make it versatile.

Overall: 8/10

The DPS is solid but puts a heavy toll on Lucy's magic Power and leaves her very vulnerable to her opponent's attack if Lucy's attack somehow didn't work, like with Kiria and that my friends is more devastating than you think.

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Significance

Just 3 major appearances and it's already very popular among western and Japanese fans alike. With lots of fanarts and a very high DPS it might be the most popular Lucy SDC so far.

Plus, from the story POV it's one of Lucy's Trump Card! Whenever she found herself cornered by tough opponents this was the first SDC she could count on.

During her battle with the Strauss Siblings, she was able to OHKO Lisanna and damage both Elfman and Mirajane with just one move!

Even in the 'Battle between Women' this was her first choice to battle Kiria. No wonder it's Lucy's ultimate strength and one of the best SDC in her arsenal. It is strong and elegant, like Lucy herself.

Significance: 10/10

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Evolution

My series could not end without me adding my personal ideas and touches to it! So what other moves or powers could LeoXVirgo SDC have?

Earth Manipulation

I don't have an image for it, but it would be lovely to see Lucy manipulating a huge chunk of Earth and hurl it on her opponent or maybe even some mud rope that can bind the opponents from all sides?

Huge Quick Sand

Something like Azeel had, from the Alveraze arc if you can recall. It was said that it could swallow entire cities! If only Lucy had something like that....if the opponent cannot fly, there is just no escape! What's better is that Lucy already had a smaller version of this move with her Virgo SD and it's called pitfall. So what if she can incorporate the same thing just on a very large scale?

Flying?

Put her fairy like wings to some good use and make her fly!!! It reminds me so much of Erza's Heavens Wheel that I can't help but imagine her flying. Don't ask, just do it!

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My Overall Opinion

As far as the SDC goes, I think it was a very neat concept. Even before the 100YQ made it official, it was suspected by many fans that she should be able to use it sooner or later. I think the concept of SD itself should have been introduced earlier in the series, so that we could have seen it evolve more but anyways.

I wish we could get a more detailed explanation on how this thing works and what other moves she can use, if any.

Otherwise, I'm always up for Lucy getting some power ups to show how capable she really is.

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So with that, I end the part #01 of my SDC MINI SERIES! Make sure, to look forward to more!

~Thanks for reading

Cheers! Aashi🌻

#lucy heartfilia #ft lucy #fairy tail #ft manga #ft 100 years quest #ft100yq #100 years quest #fairytail 100 years quest #ft 100 yq spoilers #natsu x lucy #lucy fairy tail #badass lucy #ft spoilers #lucy heartfilia smile #virgo star dress #leo star dress #lucy star dress #LeoXVirgo star dress #SDC mini series #celestial princess #celestial magic #fairy tail erza #team natsu #ft natsu #natsu dragneel #erza scarlet #gray fullbuster #fairytail meta #fairytail lucy #fairy tail 100 yq

[9w1ft]

Can't believe that some "fans" actually think that Taylor's referencing Karlie only to communicate her queerness with them when Taylor literally said in Sweet Nothing that not only does she not want to deal with any of the bullshit the Entertainment Industry throws her way but also she very much does not want to do any of the "more" any of her fans are begging her to do either, like talk about listening to Taylor talk pretty plainly about how she actually feels about a lot of things for once with Midnights including implying that she doesn't really want to do any activism at all which includes LGBT+ activism and being like "Taylor's feelings doesn't matter, what does matter is that Taylor's queerness can be useful for *us*, so obviously that's the sole meaning of everything she did with Midnights and is doing with the Eras Tour, duh!" 🙈

sweet nothing is a good example. same with dear reader. and i don’t mean it as a value judgment, towards gaylors or towards taylor. taylor can have anxiety over these things and we can (and i would argue should) still nudge her, within reason, to affect change with her platform. and this is something that happens with pop idols. i mean, that’s why we use the term idol. they become bigger than themselves and represent something more than themselves. so i understand the desire to have the idol be one’s own guiding light, and a beacon for many. it’s a natural part of human culture.

sometimes though i get frustrated because i consider most of us to be super proficient close readers of her work, so it’s odd when what i see is people not picking up the same things i am that i assume she’s been putting down.

i also think, whether intentional or not, that people often try to put that type of engagement as being on a plane that is higher. that the act of analyzing taylor’s work exclusively through a queer lens is somehow the only true way, and any declaration of which is discourse ending. that people who see the muse at the thesis of taylor’s work are uh… annoying shippers…? like… we can be queer and also be in love. why not think about what that love story is?

like imagine walking into an art gallery putting on an exhibition full of paintings by one artist, that are clearly all of a person and this person is clearly the same person. some are painted differently, maybe different colors or styles or angles, but they’re all of the same muse. and you can look around at the exhibit and notice that the benches in the room, the frames, the lighting, the artists notes below the paintings, the little room playing a video of the artist talking about their creative process, photos of the muse and blurbs about their life, the content of the brochures on the exhibit, the music playing, the timing of the exhibit, and so on and so forth, all complement the collection of paintings.

imagine walking into this space and your immediate reaction being to walk around and tell everyone appreciating the exhibit and admiring the care that went into putting the room together that everyone needs to stop talking about the muse because it’s offensive to the artist. sure, some paintings of this collection might also fit well in an exhibition set around a different theme, or maybe you’d display them differently or disagree with incorporating pieces that aren’t paintings into the installation, but do you really walk up to the curator and demand that the gallery stop with their shenanigans and only showcase paintings in a certain way? do you really bother everyone for trying to perceive all aspects of a space on a given theme? idk, i just think that there’s something to be learned from approaching the artist’s work from the angle of the muse, you know?

like if there was a picasso exhibit where picasso fans the world round brought together all of his paintings of one of his muses, would it really be so upsetting? there are plenty of galleries where you can go to look at other collections of his work, you know? doesn’t mean it isn’t gonna be worth your time to take a look around

it’s not a perfect metaphor, i just mean to highlight that i sometimes find the attitude toward kaylor to be so unmerited, especially given what taylor has presented us all with.

[kirchefuchs]

so remember

t h i s post

I recently overcame it while scrolling down your blog (I totally wasn't looking for some of my old ideas to bring back to life pfffffff totally) and I just had a thought

What if we switched the roles?

The Narrator — aka, Pollux — has the Lovebug virus and Stanley is completely normal. The same thing that happened in the post happens in this too, but with the roles switched, I can't help but feel like it hits harder (especially considering your AU)

(I love your AU ok it's so creative)

If you acknowledge that Stanley basically did everything in his power to make Pollux sentient, wouldn't that mean that him losing the very thing keeping him that way to be a great loss? All that work, down the drain, in one fell swoop — and Stanley didn't even get to say goodbye.

Imagine the devastation he felt — the overwhelming guilt, and he won't even be punished for it. Imagine having to accept that all of your work is just, gone. No countdown. No "3, 2, 1." It's gone. Imagine going through the worst depression of your life while the only one who was there for you doesn't even understand anymore. Imagine having to live through what Pollux once was without him even knowing that his whole being was permanently reset.

And the worst part was that Stanley loved him back.

Imagine the only person you've ever been with to fade away in the blink of an eye. Imagine that certain person not even being in their normal state at the time — Pollux was infected by the Lovebug virus, after all.

And imagine his last words being I love you.

Imagine having to look back at those memories and realize just how stupid you were being by lashing out. Imagine being Stanley, whose last and only memory of the man he loved being one where he isn't even himself.

Imagine being Stanley, where your story ends in a hiatus.

And in the end, there was nothing true to finish the narrative.

There's no goodbye

only a scripted confession.

anyway have a nice day and I hope you enjoy your new brainrot which I totally won't joining you in hahshdhdhgd!!

— 🅰️non || 06/13/2023

I'm fine. I'm normal about this.

Anyways.... I'd like to give you some advice if you do want to join me in my Trigun phase.

I am currently in the process of reading the manga, but I have watched both anime series and the movie. So here's what I recomend.

I don't think it super matters is your read the manga first or anything, but it is important that you watch the 1998 Trigun anime before you watch Trigun Stampede (2023). The movie takes place somewhere in the middle of the 1998 anime so you can watch it after the anime if you want or halfway though, it doesn't matter.

The order I went with was pretty much this. I've just started the manga.

Trigun 1998 (show)

Trigun: Badlands Rumble (movie)

Trigun Stampede (show)

Trigun (manga)

Trigun Maximum (manga)

Warning: while this fandom does seem silly goofy (which I'm not saying it isn't silly goofy. It is very silly goofy, however) it will make you cry. The further you get in the sadder it gets. Vash needs a break, therapy, and some donuts. So, there's that warning.

As for where to watch and read it, I used zoro.to to watch both shows and the movie and am using trigunmanga.com to read the manga. The legality of it all is pretty ehhhh, but I don't really have the money buy physical copies of the manga even though I really want to.

Hope this helps! Imma go die from the brain damage Trigun and The Stanley Parable have inflicted upon me ♡

#tspud #the stanley parable #tsp #ask #kirche rambles #🅰️non #i dont think i should put this under the trigun tag #so i wont

[autumnslance]

I have a question! How do you get over a fear of writing and creating a character? I try to write but I start feeling anxious. My brain doesn’t want to come up with anything. Even trying to imagine a character in another series causes the anxiety. I know I should stop but I don’t like the idea of stopping as I feel like I’m failing.

Is it the creation, or the potentially sharing with others, that's actually scary? Is it what others may say? Is it feeling like what you might come up with isn't "good enough" in some way? Is it fear of a self-insert, or of being derivative? Feeling like you have to create characters and stories to be in fandom, rather than wanting to create for the sake of it?

A lot of times, it's our fear of how others might react or think that stops us. We're afraid of looking dumb, or oblivious, or otherwise Incorrect in some way, and that we'll be ridiculed or scorned for it. We're taught to fear failure and the judgment we think comes with it.

It's easy to say "kill the cop in your head" and "screw what others think, create for yourself" but it IS hard, if it's a point we want to even get to for ourselves.

So figure out what part of the process actually is scary. I guarantee it's not actually "all of it!" There's at least a ranking of "scariest" to "least scary but still nerve-wracking". Once named and acknowledged, and broken down, it's a little easier to tackle.

I made up stories and characters in my own head for years before I ever shared them with anyone. A teacher singling out my and another student's stories as meeting the mark of an assignment in completely opposite ways helped. Screwing up the courage to post to my high school's nascent lit journal was hard.

I was terrified. I was one of the weird kids constantly bullied or ignored. If people knew who I was, they didn't like me cuz I was awkward and unsociable. But I wanted to write, and adults I trusted who read the few things I actually turned in told me I was decent at it, so I did it scared anyway.

And nothing bad happened. Some folks thought my stories were OK. If they said anything at all.

It took me several years before I was able to post anything online. Some was access. Some was fear. Some was feeling like I didn't have characters or stories to share. I got into roleplay, online and in person. My characters were...well, LynMars, my usual handle, is from a Vampire LARP character I played over 20 years ago, and made a lot of baby roleplayer mistakes on. I did her dirty in many ways. She wasn't a good character. Had a basic screwed up backstory but no real goals or plans. I played her for a few years and learned a lot from her, and so she's stuck with me as a reminder.

Several of my characters from those days weren't great; unimaginative, derivative, some very much "wow I did not know better back then..." But...we had stupid goofy RP fun anyway, learned from those characters and each other, tried new things. Sometimes they worked. Sometimes they didn't. A lot of times it was nerve-wracking.

There's a lot I write that I don't post. Some because it isn't ready yet. Some because I'm not ready and don't know that I ever will be. It's scary. And some of that is the bully still in my head, and I know it, and some days that's easier to deal with than others. Some days I can tell the bully to screw off. Sometimes I keep those stories private, I tell myself as indulgences.

I give myself the grace to fail, and remind myself that doing it scared anyway is where many of us live every day.

Anxiety sucks. Even with meds and therapy, it doesn't entirely go away. Figuring out how to work around it, or through it, or even wrangle it into submission and work for oneself, is tricky and individual. But it doesn't own or define you and your creativity.

Start small. Start simple. Start for yourself and don't worry about sharing it yet. If making up a new character is hard, find a favorite canon character, marinate and rotate that blorbo in your brain awhile, then file the serial numbers off as you imagine them in What Ifs and AUs. Share only if and when you're ready, if it's a thing you want to actually do.

And you may not. You don't have to create anything to be part of fandom. You don't have to have OCs with full backstories and planned futures. You don't have to write or draw or screenshot stories. You can just vibe.

Find why you want/need to create. How much it means to you. Isolate what parts of creation and/or sharing are so scary. Figure out if it's something you personally truly want or need. Then you'll be able to chart your path forward, one way or another.

#lyn prompts #blogging #about me #rambling #not sure if this is helpful #cuz I'm not sure I'll ever stop feeling scared of creating myself #I do it cuz I gotta & that's just a bit stronger than the fears

[vorpalmusings]

This is an excellent summary of the problems with AI Art beyond even the legal issues of copyright- though it indirectly addresses them as well- and especially points out why the comparisons between human learning and the algorithm “learning” only show a deep ignorance of the human process— and why relying on the algorithm will create nothing but stagnation.

From Christopher Doehling:

“I’m often accused of not understanding how gen-AI works. Nahh. I understand. Counter: a lot of tech people don’t understand human creativity or learning. I have backgrounds in all three. But mostly in art and creativity. Check my LinkedIn profile.

Before you come at me with “computers learn/create like peoples do” consider: it may be you who are in a strange land. Not me. Before you go running into the jungle, you might want a guide.

For example, ever wonder why it took us so long to learn how to draw and paint "realistically"(to make images that look like what we see)? It's because by default, our brains learn concepts, not visuals. For most, our eyes are used to recognize, not replicate.

It's like our mind throws away the visual information that is explicit, and exchanges it for understanding. I quickly know a cat from any angle I see it. I know that they are furry quadrupeds that purr when you pet them unless they scratch you. I know a cat when I see one.

My eyes also help me quickly understand the 3d space the cat occupies, so that I know where it is in relationship to my body, so that I can pet it or avoid it. My eyes help me understand "cats". Can I draw one? Not easily, because my brain, by default, doesn't care about that.

Unless... I want to care. I want to make images that represent or communicate my understanding of "Cat". Early art is more abstracted/symbolic because we expressed concepts first before explicit visuals. 4 lines= 4 legs. Shape language tells the story, with an arresting style...

Even if the exact visual (what my eyes saw) is not transmitted. Its not that we didn't want to. We didn't know how, any beginning artist experiences the same problem. Your brain wants to express what it knows conceptually, not what the eye sees.

But over time, our concepts and understanding grew to include things like optics, math, color theory. Tools we could (with great effort) apply to our artistic expressions as well.

Filippo Brunelleschi (re?)discovered linear perspective not just by looking at the world around him or at other art, but by application of those concepts. and then, finally, we could (again?)draw and paint what we saw. We could also make others see what we had only imagined.

So, we draw what we know, about what we see. Even if what we see is other art, even if I do a master copy, It comes from a place of concept. We are seeking to understand technique, another's experience, another's knowledge, not just absorb a visual for later source material.

evidence: If you have not gained at least some of the same conceptual understanding that the master did, you probably will not be able to copy their work, at least not convincingly.

"Generative" Ai (as it is) is not only unlike humans in the way that it learns, it is the polar opposite. It can copy what it sees. it can combine what it sees. But it does so without any understanding at all. About anything. At all.

A computer does not know what "cat" is. It may have some pixels->patterns that are keyworded "cat" but that is all it has. It can denoise from those latent images/parts of images, but it will only do so as instructed by our keyword requests and/or randomly seeded math, etc.

The only concepts delivered into an AI gen image are those given by the original artists or photographers. If you see a cat, its because someone else (or many someones) gave you cats to see. All the Ai did was serve it up, blindly combined.

The uniqueness of each of us, our experiences, and the concepts we learn and teach are what makes art evolve. If Ai had "taken over" for us at, say, the medieval period (in Europe), Art movements would have ended there too. Renniassance, Baroque, Impressionism, Cubism,...

Etc. they never would have happened. because no matter what prompt you gave, all you would get would be remixes of Medieval paintings, or anything previous to that time period. Ai doesn't make anything really new. not the way we do. It only (blindly) combines what's already made.

That's what's at stake here. We are on the brink of handing our creativity over to something that isn't creative. Why would we limit ourselves like that? If you think it makes art easy, it doesn't. It's an illusion. All you have is the art made up to this point. and no more.

If you want to be an artist, be one. No matter what your skill level, it's better than this. You are contributing of yourself to the world. You are contributing. period.

P.S. it’s not that Ai doesn’t have valid uses as a real tool. But when we get the idea that it’s a pet pro artist that “does the dirty work for me”, that’s a dark path. The dirty work is what moves us forward. it’s also the fun part, and we are the only ones who can really do it.”

Original post:

https://twitter.com/dolimac/status/1635286958330224641?s=46&t=MInooHF4e3-CHmlyx2cj8w

#ai art debate #blog post #article #ai art theft #ai art isn't real art #ai art discourse

[suzy-queued]

Artist Interview

Happy Boxing Day! I was tagged by @you-are-so-much-better-than-that in this artist interview.

1. Do you post on AO3? If so, how many works do you have on AO3? If not, where do you post?

I do post on AO3 as Suzy_Queue. I have two art galleries there, one for general art and one for Kinktober 2022.

2. What is your total art count?

If you count art done for other people's stories, headers for my own stories, and Gallacrafts pieces, it's around 150.

3. What are your top 5 pieces by likes/kudos?

I use this cool website to get my full Tumblr stats. According to them:

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! Although I'm not the fastest at it.

5. What is your current fandom, and what was the first fandom you drew for?

Currently, it's Gallavich all the way. The first fandom I remember drawing for was Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, making my own comics. (they were 7th-grade-girl bad).

6. Have you ever received hate on any art?

Nope, people are very supportive, even on pieces that I know aren't that great.

7. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t drawn for yet but want to?

I can't really think of any.

8. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

The one that has lived in my brain for the longest part of my life is Han/Leia.

9. Do you draw outside of fandom?

Yeah! I was an art major in college. I've been a professional artist for 20 years and have created art for book covers, movie posters, album covers, logos. I go to figure drawing sessions at a local art school and am in a nature journaling group. I've displayed my horror art at conventions around the country.

10. What’s the an art piece you’ve drawn that came out completely differently than you expected?

This was the first piece I ever drew on a tablet with a pressure-sensitive pen. It was an experiment to learn the tools. I had no idea how it would look, and it turned out all right.

11. Do you draw smut?

Yep! There's some smut in this gallery.

12. Have you ever had any of your art stolen or copied?

Not that I know of.

13. Have you ever collaborated on a piece?

I've created art for stories working with the author, but I've never co-drawn a piece of art. Unless you count playing Exquisite Corpse with my children.

14. What’s an idea you have that you have yet to draw?

Oh, I have a lot. The one I think about most is a picture of Ian and Mickey in a lineup at jail, looking disheveled, hung over, and completely in love.

15. What are your drawing strengths?

I like my compositions a lot, the flow of items throughout the picture. I feel like I'm good at drawing what I see in a realistic way, whether it's a photo or real life.

16. What are your drawing weaknesses?

Drawing from memory/imagination. I have to have reference photos of what I'm doing or I go off the rails. I need to develop more trust in my own style and lean into weird proportions and my own skewed vision.

17. What’s your favorite art piece you’ve drawn?

I'm quite partial to this book cover art I did. It's spray paint, pastel, and acrylic. It's about 4 feet tall.

18. What is one thing you’d like to tell people about your art that they might not know?

Just because I've been doing it for a while doesn't mean I'm not still learning every day.

19. What inspires or motivates you to create for fandom?

I have a lot of emotional energy churning below the surface. Creating art and fics helps get it out. It's a much more positive outlet than letting it brew.

20. And finally, can you describe your process a little? Do you have a favorite place to draw? Do you play something in the background? Do you do research or just go for it? Give us a little insight.

I have a basement office where I write and draw. I bought a new table this year which I absolutely love. I do most of my creative work between 9-11 pm after the rest of my family has gone to bed. I do love music and play it a lot while I draw.

I research a ton. I spend a lot of time making photo compositions for every piece I draw, which are collages of body parts and other images.

Thank you so much for the tag for this interview!

#fan art #about me #artist interview