#instagram: @hebaklein

[borderlineflower]

everyone keeps telling me that i have to stay alive for them, that killing myself would be selfish because they need me and my departure would cause them great pain.

what about MY pain? what about ME? i’m dying inside, falling apart every single night and shoving back my broken pieces inside my chest every morning, bleeding internally. what about MY pain? why can’t i rest easy? isn’t it selfish for you to ask me to stay knowing how badly i’m hurting?

#instagram: @hebaklein #rambles #bpd #bpdprobs #actually boderline #actuallyborderline #borderline personality disorder #tw suicide #suicide #suicidal #depression #depressed #sad #alone #hopeless #anxiety #anxious #ana #anorexia #i really dont want to do this anymore on god

[borderlineflower]

being around me is hard? imagine being in my head i’m stuck with myself 24/7 at least you get a break!!!

#instagram: @hebaklein #rambles #no context #but for real #bpd #borderline personality disorder #anxiety #depression #ugh #bpdprobs #bpdlife #actuallyborderline #ana #anorexia #sick of uyall #depressed #mental illness #smh

[borderlineflower]

i want to see more ACCURATE representation of people who suffer of borderline personality disorder. i’m tired of seeing us portrayed as psycho bitches who either want to ruin someone’s life or do crazy shit for attention. we’re human?? we have a heart and we have feelings??? we’re not villains???? we’re just regular people who feel too much and yes we can be too much at times but we’re literally doing the best we can?????? 

#instagram: @hebaklein #im sick of yall #watch out for my novel #no BS in mine #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #actuallyborderline #bpdproblems #borderline personality disorder #borderline #disorder #rambles #smh

[borderlineflower]

it’s crazy how i allow my mental illness to control nearly every aspect of my life.

one little thing will happen and i will blow it out of proportion and let it ruin my week.

every single time i think i've gotten better, i realize that i’m not that okay after all.

#instagram: @hebaklein #rambles #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #actuallyborderline #borderline personality disorder #bpdlife #depression #anxiety #anorexia #fml

[borderlineflower]

i’m in the mood to burn this world down and to lay down under twelve blankets and cry myself to sleep.

#instagram: @hebaklein #rambles #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallyborderline #borderline personality disorder #ugh #my man cheated #he didnt tell me and i have no proof but i know #depression #depressed #lonely

[borderlineflower]

you know what? i’m done apologizing for the way i feel. my feelings are valid and no one can fucking tell me otherwise. does the sun apologize for shining? do clouds apologize for raining? nope. so i’m done apologizing for something i cannot control.

#instagram: @hebaklein #no context in particular #im just done #unapologetic #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #actuallyborderline #bpdproblems #borderline personality disorder #feelings #emotions #rambles #txt #depression #anxiety #writer

[borderlineflower]

it’s a constant struggle to ask myself “hey, are they really abandoning me or is it my bpd acting up??????” either way, i’m stressed!!!!!

#instagram: @hebaklein #rambles #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallyborderline #actuallybpd #borderline personality disorder #i hate it here #aka this planet #im tired #should i hang myself? i literally feel like i can't breathe #abandonment issues #yay me #everyone leaves me anyways so

[borderlineflower]

you’re not here so see you in my dreams i guess

#instagram: @hebaklein #rambles #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #borderline personality disorder #actuallyborderline #ugh #tas #love #lonely

[borderlineflower]

did you ever love me, or was it all just a fucked up game to you?

#instagram: @hebaklein #rambles #i dont like being played with #@ every men i've been with #fuck yall tbh #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #actuallyborderline #borderline personality disorder #love #relationships #cl...j...mainly cl #im crazy

[borderlineflower]

i just want you guys to know that you are loved, even when you think you aren’t, remember that you have me. i love you. i support you.

#instagram: @hebaklein #rambles #pics #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #borderline personality disorder #actuallyborderline #❤️

[borderlineflower]

i just want to be loved softly, is that too much to ask????

#instagram: @hebaklein #rambles #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #borderline personality disorder #actuallyborderline #ugh #love

[borderlineflower]

is life worth living should i blast myself?

#instagram: @hebaklein #rambles #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #borderline personality disorder #actuallyborderline #lyrics #changes #tupac #tw: suicide

[borderlineflower]

sad and lonely

instagram: @hebaklein

❤️

#rambles #pics #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #borderline personality disorder #actuallyborderline #me #borderline #selfie #sad #lonely

[borderlineflower]

hey loves,

for those who don’t know me yet, i’m heba, a 23 year old woman who loves to write and that lives in canada. i struggle (well, excel, mental illness comes easily to me lmao) with borderline personality disorder, anxiety, depression and i am also a recovering addict. i made this blog to connect with other people who struggle with the same things i do and to create a safe space for me to let out all the things that are slowly killing me inside. my goal is to connect with a lot of you, have a good following and once i do i’m planning on self publishing a book i wrote.

about my book: i wrote a book called crushed, it’s a story where the main character has borderline personality disorder (she’s based on me) and i go into details about self harm, love, abandonment issues, daddy issues, friendship, family, sexuality and even more topics related to bpd. of course, the story revolves around a man she loves and what she’s willing to do and accept to be with him while discovering who she is and what she’s really worth, all that while dealing with bpd symptoms.

it’s not out just yet, like i mentioned previously, i’m waiting to get a bigger following to share it with the world. i don’t have a marketing team, literary agent or anyone helping me get it out there but me. 

if you’re interested in knowing more about my book and to be notified when the book is out or have some questions, send me a message!

if you want to donate in order to help me pay for the publishing costs, you may do so here: https://www.gofundme.com/f/publishing-my-first-novel-crushed?utm_source=customer&utm_medium=copy_link&utm_campaign=p_cf+share-flow-1

instagram: @hebaklein email: [email protected]

love you all dearly,

heba x

#rambles #crushed #ok heba let's do this #can't believe i'm typing this #phase 1 #i'm really on my own #my ass has to pay fucking 700$ to get it published and formatted and all #i legit have no one helping me #this will legit be the hardest shit imma do in my fucking life. #anxiety #depression #hi #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #actuallyborderline #borderline personality disorder #mental illness #author #book #self publishing #self published #ahhhh #idk what to add to reach a big audience #writer #writing #wtf #hello #love story #love

[borderlineflower]

i went to work today and they let people go home early, i convinced my homie to leave early too and we went for a walk in the city, it was hot as hell so i ended up buying a cute little dress (one wearing above), ate good vietnamese food and ate pastries in a gorgeous coffee shop while waiting for the rain to stop.

then i came home, only to find out that the electricty cut off in the whole city because of the storm, so i sat with my parents outside while listening to father john misty and enjoying the cool afterrain breeze.

i haven’t felt this good in a while.

i’m still stressed a little, but i’m not gonna focus on that for now. because after all, today was a good day.

H x

ps: my instagram is @hebaklein 💜

#rambles #pics #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #borderline personality disorder #actuallyborderline #journals #me #selfie #hi

[borderlineflower]

my partner isnt answering my texts. my stomach hurts. i’m fucking disgusting. nothing is going well. my shrink ignored my messages. im broke. i’m super irritable and i feel like no one wants me around.

fuck my life i want to die.

@hebaklein on instagram

#rambles #pics #bpd #bpdprobs #actuallybpd #borderline personality disorder #actuallyborderline #ugh #me #tw suicide #selfie