#ig. don't listen when you're in a bad place I'm not even feeling that bad and started at from a distance (song) just killed me

[aromanticannibal]

Hello I am once again asking you to listen to Feldup's new album (edit: ive made a rec post)

#I just listened to stared at from a distance the song (after waters which I had already listened to) and it has fundamentally altered my #brain chemistry #some info on the guy : he's french and also does YouTube videos on horror and internet horrific phenomenona but his music is in english #it's indie alternative rock for the most part #in stared at from a distance (the album) some songs are pretty long. I advise you to have lyrics under your eyes #his singing isn't for everyone but I personally love it #big tw warning for csa and sa in general in some of his songs because he's a survivor and sings about it. General warning for mental illnes #ig. don't listen when you're in a bad place I'm not even feeling that bad and started at from a distance (song) just killed me #he's really really really good and he deserves to have more fans of his music pls give it a try #if you don't want to bother with the full almums I'll make a rec list of my favorites from his two albums once I'm done listening #feldup #stared at from a distance #a thousand doors just one key #French artist #music recs

[niningtori]

supermodel | part two

part one

pairing: choi beomgyu x you

summary: after finding out one of your closest friends sabotaged your relationship with beomgyu in hopes of having him all to herself, you end up spending a night with him. you may come to regret it when you realize beomgyu may not have been as innocent as he initially seemed.

genre: romance, angst, MELODRAMA, yandere, smut (MDNI!!!)

warnings: MDNI!!! yandere!gyu (super manipulative!gyu at least), more (justified imo) cheating, unprotected sex, oral (m. receiving), creampie, dacryphilia, praise, degradation, pregnancy kink, voyeurism (ig?), dom!gyu, sub!gyu, if i'm missing anything lmk

word count: 6.2k

notes: alright ;_; after much debate i'm reposting this probably only for a few days just so everyone who wanted to read can read it before i (probably) delete again! posting this made me feel rlly insecure for some reason but thanks to my moots and anons i feel a lot better ab it :) at least for a little bit. also, i know the direction may have taken quite the turn but this is genuinely just how it came out 😭 if you don't like it i'm sorry ( ཀ͝ ∧ ཀ͝ )

it’s hard to reason with beomgyu as he presses hot kisses down your neck, but it’s not like you’re not trying. you think you’re trying really hard, actually, but it’s nothing in comparison to the effort he’s putting in to make you lose your mind. you have no control over your moans when he sucks a hickey into your neck. you feel heat pooling in your stomach as he grabs your ass and snakes his other hand up your hoodie to catch one of your hardened nipples between his fingers. he’s finally tasted you and, like a man starved, he’ll be damned before someone takes away what’s his.

“b-beomie, we can’t! let’s go back to my place, at least,” you try to reason, but your resolve is weakening as you feel your pussy wetten under his caresses. 

“shh, hana’s not gonna be home tonight,” he whispers. “just want you so bad, can’t wait.” he looks so earnest, you can’t bear to part from him. his puppy eyes look devastated, so what else can you do besides relent? and he knows it, too. now he’s got you. 

he leads you to hana’s bedroom, where he’s spent countless nights listening to her talk about how much she loves him, has loved him for years. he wants to roll his eyes at this, but he doesn’t want you to misunderstand, so he keeps it to himself. he’ll admit, she really did pull the wool over his eyes when she said you didn’t like him, so he can’t wait to see her reaction when she realizes you two have finally figured it out. if she wants to play dirty, they can both try their hand and see who wins. 

and it feels an awful lot like he’s winning when he sees you undress once again, body bare with traces of him on every part of you. even if he hadn’t marked you up so much, and he has, there’s still evidence of his impact on you leaking out of your pussy. you letting him come inside was truly unexpected, but welcome, nonetheless. he knows, when you’ve sobered up from your lustful daze, you’ll ask him if he’s ever fucked hana raw. you’ll probably cry again and rush to get plan b, but he’ll tell you he’s not stupid. he’d never fuck anyone without protection, especially someone he likes as little as he likes hana. he just likes you so much, he couldn’t help but want to feel you. you’re everything he dared to wish you would be. even better, actually, and now that he’s tasted you, he never wants to stop. 

the feeling of wanting to be close to you reemerges when he sees you dropping to your knees for him. you fiddle with the zipper of his pants and he sighs when cool air meets his bare cock. and you're so perfect with your makeup smudged, hair in disarray, and mouth open, prettily presented for fucking.

you start with a lick of your lips and he’s already rock hard from the anticipation. you grab his base and tease little licks up and down his length. he never thought he’d be particularly into that, really, but you look so hungry for him it makes him whine. finally, you lick the precum off of his tip and he moans when you shallowly take in the tip of his cock, hollowing out your cheeks. you bob your head shallowly and it’s taking every ounce of self control he has not to grab the back of your head and shove himself down your throat. but he doesn’t want to hurt you, so he lets you tease him. for now, at least. you take more and more of him into your warm mouth until you can feel his tip searing the back of your throat. you can’t possibly fit all of him into your mouth, so you take the rest of him in your hands. you look up at him with watery eyes, almost like you’re asking for his approval, and his already thinning patience snaps. he grabs your hair and pumps himself in and out of you. you try to meet his thrusts with teasing swipes of your tongue, never once breaking eye contact. the combination of your gaze and the sight of your drool mixed with his precum dripping out of your mouth drives him crazy. 

“baby, look, you’re drooling all over my cock.” you hum in agreement, but a nasty thought crosses his mind as he remembers that you almost went out with another man tonight.

“mmm, who taught you how to use that slutty little mouth?” he asks, riling himself up for reasons unknown. the thought of someone else seeing you like this is enough to push him to madness. he fucks himself into your mouth mercilessly. you’re coughing and slobbering all over his cock, but it’s only when hot tears pour down your face that he registers what he’s doing. how can he bear to hurt you? he pulls out and you’re gasping for air. 

“shh, it’s okay, you’re okay. c’mere,” he coos, leading you to the bed.

you lay down shakily and he takes a moment just to admire your body and the work he’s done to it. he can’t control the want in his gaze when he sees your pussy dripping on hana’s comforter. it’s sick to see, in a way, but it excites him even more. 

“turn around,” he commands, and you would, you really, really would, but your limbs feel so weak, it’s a chore. he sighs and roughly turns you on your stomach himself. he manhandles you into kneeling on all fours and it’s all you can do not to buckle under such force, but you can’t deny the way it makes your pussy clench around nothing when he does this. as if he can read your mind, he lets out a soft laugh as he lines himself up with your entrance and pushes himself in. you’ve obviously just fucked, but you’re still as tight and hot as the first time. slowly, he feels you stretch and spasm to accommodate his length – pussy gripping him like a vise. he shakes when he feels himself completely sheathed in you. 

“g-good girl,” he praises. “so good for me.” then, without giving you another moment to adjust, he begins thrusting into you. his hips meet your ass and he’s awestruck by the sight of it as the tip of his cock kisses your cervix relentlessly. as he’s pumping into your heat, you don’t mean for your arms to give out from under you, but they do. he’s just fucking you so good you can’t help but feel weak. he chuckles at how you’re becoming undone after just a few strokes, but truthfully? he’s endeared. you were so brave in talking back to him earlier, but that attitude is completely gone as you lay there and let him take you over and over again. 

“nghh… not so hard, beomie,” you moan. 

“is it good, baby? i can feel you milking my cock. tell me it’s good, or i’ll stop,” he threatens.

“mmm, ‘s good! too good!”! you cry.

you’re so busy moaning out beomgyu’s name with your face mashed in the pillows, you really don’t hear the apartment door open and keys being thrown carelessly on the table, but as for beomgyu? he hears it all and it brings a mean, lopsided grin to his face. you’d think he would, at the very least, slow down, but he only rams harder and harder into you. the sound of wetness and skin slapping skin echo throughout the room. hana really wasn’t supposed to be home, this much is true, but what beomgyu didn’t tell you is that she had texted him saying her plans have changed and that he should come over. truly, he couldn’t have conjured up a better outcome than the one unfolding before him.

“beomgyu?!” hana shrieks. you’re so surprised you nearly jump out of beomgyu’s grasp, but he holds your ass in place as he continues his thrusts.

“don’t listen to her, just feel me,” he says in a raspy tone. and what can you do besides listen when he drills himself even harder into you? when you feel the veins of his cock dragging against your insides, you’re tuning out hana’s desperate cries, intentionally or not.

“coming inside, okay?” he, well, you would say ‘asks’, but it’s more of a statement of fact rather than a question. “take it all, baby,” he says as his hips begin to stutter. he smacks your ass — just because he can — and you feel it pulsate throughout your entire body as you clench around him, seeing nothing but white behind your eyelids as your release finally comes along with his.

you’re gasping for air when you finish. he carefully pulls out and watches as your cum and his mix together in the most sinful way. it’s a truly a sight to see, and if he had more time, he would be whipping out his phone and capturing the moment to revisit the next time he’s alone, but hana’s words are cutting into his bliss before he can fully appreciate the sight before him.

“b-beomie? w-what’s going on?” hana asks, tears streaming unabashedly down her pretty face. beomgyu is far too preoccupied to appreciate them, though, as he gently helps you sit up and thoughtfully wipes the drool and tears off of your face. 

“‘what’s going on?’” he begins mockingly. “do you really need me to show you again?” he sneers. 

meanwhile, you feel like a deer in headlights as you meet hana’s gaze. you feel dirty and small as you try your damndest to cover yourself up. hana’s soft eyes harden while she stares at you. 

“you. you did this, you fucking slut,” she spits. you break your gaze and stare down at your naked body. you feel incredibly vulnerable because, as you already know, she’s right. you feel your eyes heat up with tears, this time from guilt and humiliation rather than pleasure.

“you’d better watch your fucking mouth,” beomgyu says, eyebrows furrowed and voice even deeper than usual. 

“i just don’t understand. why? why her? and how could you do this to me? you said you loved me!” she shrieks, grabbing beomgyu’s arm. he harshly pulls away and instead collects your sweats and hoodie. you can’t help but stare. he said he loved her then he turned around and fucked you? oh no. 

“well, i lied, if that’s not clear enough,” he shrugs, gingerly dressing you like you’re some kind of catatonic doll. and, right now, you might as well be as you let him do what he wants. his callous words don’t match his gentle actions and it’s making your brain short-circuit. 

“if and when he does the same shit to you,” she says, looking at you with more hurt than you’ve ever seen on a person, “don’t you fucking dare come crying to me. or any of our friends, actually. just wait ‘til they hear what you fucking did.” you shiver at her ominous words. she’s right, after all. beomgyu dropped her the second you showed interest in him, who’s to say he won’t do the same to you? sure, he’s acting lovey dovey now, but you’ve seen firsthand how quickly his tune can change. you’re absolutely fucked. it’s your word against hers, and with the evidence of your betrayal seeping into her sheets, you don’t like your odds. you can’t help but stare at beomgyu, and, as if he’s reading your mind, he says his next words patiently.

“i love you. i would never hurt you like this.” he loves you now? you continue to look at him doubtfully. his words seem cheap after hana’s unforgiving speech, and he realizes he’s losing you when you don’t respond. hana doesn’t stop there, though.

“if he did this to me, i can’t wait to see what he’ll do to you,” she laughs. hana is, objectively speaking, a lot more of a catch than you are. and to the very bitter end, she won’t let you fucking forget it.

“shut your fucking mouth!” he exclaims and she flinches, as do you. you’ve never seen him so angry and it’s enough to scare you. 

“... i should go,” you croak.

“yeah, you should,” hana ridicules. you do an incredibly shaky walk of shame as you quickly gather your things. 

“hey, wait!” he pleads, but you’re already booking it out of the door. he goes to run after you, but hana grabs him forcefully by his shoulder and he spins around to face her. you slam the door, not wanting to know what kind of makeup sex they will probably be having relatively soon. as soon as you’re gone, hana begins.

“are you fucking crazy? her, of all people?!” she hisses.

“i thought i told you to watch how you talk about her,” he says lowly. his eyes are so intense, she’s momentarily stunned, but he’s crazy if he thinks that’ll shut her up. perhaps to her eventual regret, she says her next words.

“if i tell everyone, she’ll be fucking ruined. she’ll have nobody after this.” 

“so?” 

“so, stay with me,” she says softly, while, to his disgust, grabbing his hands and pleading with him. “stay with me, and i won’t tell anybody.” she looks as pathetic as a dog right now, and her words make him laugh in her face.

“tell them,” he says. 

“w-what?” she sputters.

“tell them all. i want you to tell them how i fucked one of your best friends and got her pregnant. tell them how i fucked her raw in your own bed. go on, i’d love to see their reactions when they find out.” 

“you’re… you’re fucking crazy,” she gasps.

“maybe, but not crazy enough to stay with you,” he shrugs. “i got what i wanted, i don’t need you anymore.” for once, she shuts her mouth. the puzzle pieces finally fit together and her jaw drops in awe.

“you did this on purpose?” 

“maybe you’re not as dumb as you look,” he sneers, and with that, he zips up his pants and pats her cheek. “you were okay in bed, but that’s about it.” 

her tears are falling, but that does nothing to mar her beauty. still, his heart remains unfazed. 

“when she finds out, she’ll leave you,” she sobs.

“and who will she believe? her ex friend who’s out to get her, or me? the only person she has left? i’d love to see who she believes.” his words leave her in even more tears, but he does nothing to placate her. he just grabs his shit and slams the door behind him.

-

hana wastes no time in telling your friends about your scandal. your incoming texts range from “what the fuck is wrong with you” to “is it true?” to “you’d better not show your face to us again”.

you attempt to explain yourself, but to no avail. even if hana lied to you first, you committed the ultimate betrayal with a smile on your face. nobody wants to hear your sob story about your forbidden love with beomgyu. nobody, not even your best friend, dares to defend you now.

the one person who’s on your side has been texting you relentlessly, though. beomgyu’s insistence on making sure you’re okay does little to quell the uneasiness in your heart. hana’s words resound in your head. “if he did this to me, i can’t wait to see what he does to you.” you don’t want to give him that chance, but your resolve is weakening when you feel yourself becoming more and more isolated from the people you used to call your friends. 

for days, you don’t leave your house except to go to work. where else can you go? you don’t have anyone to go out with you anymore. still, beomgyu texts and attempts to call you through it all. his messages are all about how much he loves you, how much he misses you, how much he needs you. how much he promises to make things right with you and how you’re the only one he’s wanted all along. more and more, you feel yourself slipping away. even though you never respond, you still sift through his messages and it’s enough to bring smiles, no matter how small, to your face. he loves you, wants you, needs you. who else do you have in your life to say things like that to you? 

still, the thought of trusting him scares you to your bones. what if he does the same shit to you? you don’t have a support system anymore. you don’t have anybody to rely on when he inevitably hurts you in the same way. why wouldn't he, after all? you’re no match for the kind of girls who come his way. what happens when he gets sick of you and wants to fuck another girl in your bed? you’re stuck with these thoughts as you nurse a bottle of vodka, alone in your apartment with nobody but yourself. this is what you deserve, you think. 

a knock on your door is enough to pull you out of your drunken haze. is it one of your friends? could they have finally gotten over their intial shock and disgust and understood that you didn’t mean for any of this to happen the way it did? you stumble to the door and you’re too drunk to even think about checking who it is before desperately swinging open the door. you are not met with the familiar face of one of your friends, however. instead, you see the face of the boy who’s been haunting your dreams for the past few nights.

“beomgyu?” he looks absolutely devastated, eyes reddened and wet with his face ghostly pale. he reeks of alcohol and he stands almost tremblingly. he doesn’t respond to you, just stares at you with the same intensity that entranced you from the very beginning.

“what are you doing here?” you ask. 

“can i come in? please?” you’ve never been able to say no to him, and you especially can’t in his current pathetic state. you move from the doorway to allow him access and quietly shut the door behind him.

“what do you want?” you try.

“want you,” he sobs, tears finally flowing from his sad brown eyes. “only ever wanted you.” your heart aches when you see him like this. you thought hana’s reaction was devastating enough, but he looks absolutely wrecked right now, putting her despair to shame, really. 

“i don’t know what to say,” you admit. “we fucked up, plain and simple. and i don’t know how i can trust you after what we did.” you’re not a victim in this, to be clear, but you’re far too vulnerable to accept the heart that he's holding out for you so carelessly. 

“i know, and i'm sorry. i'm so, so sorry. what can i do to make you trust me?” he begs. your already soft heart softens even more at his words, but you have to be realistic.

“i… i don’t think i can. if you had just talked to me in the first place things could've been different,” you reason. this only puts the boy in an even worse state. he’s almost wailing now, and he looks to you for comfort.

“p-please, just please. give me one chance,” he cries, looking absolutely frantic. “i’ll prove it to you, just let me.” he reaches for your face and you didn’t even realize you’re crying until he swipes away your tears. well, you’re already going to hell. what’s the point in atoning for your sins now? 

as if he can read your mind, he musters up a shaky smile before leaning in and giving you a chaste kiss. his lips taste salty, but sweet, and he’s kissing you with a passion you’ve never felt before. you almost believe him when he says you’re the only one. almost.

“h-how do i know you’re not going to do the same thing to me?” you ask unsteadily. 

“i would never,” he says immediately. “i would never hurt you.” at least, not like this. but you don’t know that yet. 

-

in the weeks following his drunken appearance at your door, being with beomgyu is even better than you thought it would be. it’s like a switch has been turned back on and he’s back to treating you like a princess, almost like the months since your “breakup” never happened. he randomly brings you flowers, showers you with kisses, and he can’t seem to keep his hands off of you along with declarations of love, which you never directly reciprocate. no matter how well he treats you, though, there’s an underlying sense of unease. you still find it difficult to fully trust him, and he can tell. it’s driving him to the brink of madness trying to come up with ways to show you how much he cares.

you’re in the middle of pensively reevaluating the nature of your relationship with beomgyu for the 100th time when you hear a knock on your door. at this point, you don't even bother checking who it is because you already know it'll be beomgyu. no matter how desperately you wish it were one of your ex-friends, you’re always met with his face, instead. you open the door and you’re shocked, to put it mildly. standing before you is not the beomgyu you know and (probably) love, but hana.

“we need to talk,” she grumbles. almost as if you’re possessed, you let her in without much fuss. is she here to rekindle your friendship? to tell you she’ll forgive you after what you’ve done to her? 

“hana, listen i’m so incredibly sor—” 

“save it,” she says, lifting her hand. “i’m only here ‘cause i have something i need to say to you. it took me weeks to come here because i don’t even wanna look at you.” you gulp and nod, genuinely anxious as to what she has in store for you.

“i’m just going to tell you straight up. beomgyu’s not who you think he is,” she deadpans. 

“w-what do you mean?” if she’s talking about how he’ll eventually betray you, you’ve already thought of that. why she thinks this is news to you, you don’t know.

“listen to me, he planned this whole fucking thing.” what could she possibly mean by that? he planned to get caught by her? that doesn’t even make sense. “i told him i’d be home the night that i walked in on you.” your jaw drops in horror, but she continues as if she doesn’t notice.

“i think… i think he heard us over the phone and knew you’d be there before meeting with jay. he told me he wanted our friends to find out and to see who you’d believe if i told you. whether you believe me or not, i really don’t give a fuck, but it’s true. he said he got what he wanted, so he doesn’t need me anymore.” she chokes on her last words and you can't help but feel sorry for her, but that feeling is overshadowed by the feelings of anger towards beomgyu. you don’t think hana would lie about this. she looks so flustered and heartbroken, you don’t believe for a second that she’s lying just to rile you up. before you can reply, the door opens and beomgyu’s figure appears in your doorway. he has a smile on his face, but it drops lightning fast when he sees who’s standing there.

“what the fuck are you doing here?” he says with a scowl.

“i’m on my way out,” hana mumbles, pushing past him. he doesn’t even attempt to stop her. he registers the mixed emotions on your face and he can guess what she said to you without much effort.

“let me explain,” he says lowly, already heading towards you to placate you like you’re some sort of wild animal he has to coax. and you’re so angry, you might as well be.

“explain what? that you ruined my fucking life?” you spit. he flinches at your tone, even more so at your next words. “what i don’t understand is why? is my life a fucking game to you?” his face crumbles at this. 

“n-no! never!” he sputters.

“then what is this? what’s your reason for planning for hana to walk in us? is this a kink or something?” he shakes his head frantically. 

“you don’t understand, i just wanted it to be us,” he pleads. “i don’t like them. they’ll just try to take you away from me.” 

“take me away from them? beomgyu, i’m not some fucking toy. i’m a person. a person whose life you fucking ruined for no reason!” you exclaim. you’re so frustrated you could cry, so you do. does he not realize how badly he fucked you over? “you promised you’d never hurt me,” you sob.

“i-i did it for us! they wouldn’t care about how we feel… they’d just take hana’s side without even thinking about it!” he argues, grabbing your hands. you want to pull away, but if you do, that means you’ll be completely alone. 

“you didn’t even give them a chance,” you reason. “now it’s really over,” you say between sobs. “i… i could’ve talked to them, but you ruined it!” 

“i just want you all to myself, is that so bad?” he asks, as if he genuinely can't understand why you’re so upset. he’s actually sick in the head.

“why?!” you ask again, ripping your hands from his grasp.

“because i love you,” he says desperately. “i just love you so much. i’m sorry, i’ll never do anything like this again,” he promises. 

“yeah, you won’t,” you reply bitterly. “because i won’t give you that chance.” 

“w-what do you mean?” he asks, lips trembling and eyes red.

“i’m not doing this with you anymore. this whole thing was doomed from the start,” you reply firmly. he shakes his head as if denying it with fervor will undo what you’ve said, tears now flowing freely from his reddened eyes.

“no, p-please,” he cries. “i only did it because i love you so much. ever since i first saw you, i only ever wanted to be with you. i… i know i fucked up, but it was the only way. believe me, please.” your already soft heart is softening even more as you listen to the desperation in his voice. he sounds so lost and scared, as if he really doesn’t know what he’ll do if you tell him no. you briefly wonder if he’s ever heard the words: “no, beomgyu. you’ve gone too far this time.” but as you watch him come undone before you, you don’t think you’ll be able to be the one who tells him no, anyway. 

“i’m giving you one, and i mean one, last chance. if you fuck up this time, i promise you, you’ll never see me again,” you declare. you don't know what you’re expecting, really, but the sight of even more tears streaming down his face is not it. he grabs you and pulls you in his warm and trembling embrace.

“th-thank you,” he cries. “you won’t regret this.” 

“i’d better not,” you mumble. even if you do, you can’t deny the way your heart skips a beat at his pure, unadulterated need for you. even if you do come to regret it, it’s impossible to look at him right now and say he’s not being sincere. he pulls away from you and hurriedly captures your mouth, and as if your next words will take back what you said, he seals them in your throat before you can manage to get anything more out. as the kiss becomes more heated, you feel something hard and angry poking into your stomach.

“already?” you tease. he actually blushes at this.

“can’t help it. need you,” he replies sheepishly. 

“you need me, huh? is that why you’ve been so bad?” you ask, palming him deliciously through his pants.

“n-not bad! just love you so much, couldn’t stop myself.” your temper actually flares a little at this. you palm him more harshly and his breath catches when you do.

“really? but you’ve been so bad, i don’t think you deserve me,” you say menacingly, pulling your hand away. he audibly whimpers at this.

“no, no, no, please! i’ll be good from now on,” he pleads as he grabs your hand and begins to snake it under the waistband of his pants. you let him, but you don’t take his hardened length into your hand like you usually would. instead, you tease the sensitive area around it, even going so far as to ghost your fingers over his balls, but you conveniently avoid giving him any sort of friction or attention, so he’s gasping when you give him a mean and unexpected tug. 

“p-please stop teasing me,” he cries, eyes so beautiful and watery. “i know i’ve been bad, but i can make you feel so good.” he’s right, in a way. you’ve never and will never feel as good as you do when beomgyu pumps into you and shoots his hot load in your pussy, but he’s deranged if he thinks you’ll let him have you so easily tonight. not after what he’s done.

“hmm, i’m not so sure about that,” you hum. you lead him to your bedroom as if he’s hypnotized. you haven’t even let him enter you yet, if you’re going to let him do so at all, but he’s already acting like he’s drunk on you. 

“strip,” you command simply. without any questions or doubts, he eagerly takes off his hoodie and shoves his pants down, stepping out of them and closer to you. it’s sickeningly sweet to see how possessed he is by you. he tries to take your own clothes off, but you smack his hand away. 

“bad boy,” you say, and he whines like a dog. “lay down.” he does what you say, lying completely exposed on your bed as he gives a few pulls on his throbbing cock. “stop fucking touching yourself or you’re not getting anything from me,” you add, and he whines even louder. 

“please touch me,” he begs, cock standing all red and weeping. 

“you don’t deserve it,” you shrug. you take off your pants and he leches at the image of your pussy dripping wet for him, and so soon. all he can think about is how warm it is and how fervently he wants to be in it. he thinks you’re going to sit on his cock, because that would be the most natural course of action, but all you do is lay next to him and pull something out of your nightstand drawer. a vibrator. are you fucking serious? 

“no!” he begs, already knowing how this is going to go.

“you can take what you get from me or you can beat it,” you bite back. that shuts him up. he’s biting his lip, trying not to get scolded again, but he can’t help but whine again when you spread your legs and turn your vibrator on. 

“ah,” you moan as the rubber tip hits your clit. “feels so good.” 

“i’d feel better,” he insists, eyes widened and desperate like a madman. 

“touch yourself,” you say in response. “i'm not touching that dirty cock of yours, so take care of it yourself.” he doesn’t need to be told twice. he immediately spits on his hand and begins to wildly jerk his weeping cock. he whines at the friction. you, however, are so lost in the feeling of the vibrations pulsating throughout your pussy, you couldn’t seem to care less about what he does. this only makes him whine even louder. he’s experiencing pleasure, sure, but the sounds coming from him are exaggerated and theatrical. he’s just trying to get a rise out of you. he just wants you to look at him, is that too much to ask?

you open your eyes at his petulant noise and say your next words so quietly, if he wasn’t paying more attention, he’d miss them. “kiss me.” so he does. the kiss is filthy and nothing more than the tangling of tongues, but that combined with the stimulation on your poor pussy is enough to make you near the edge. 

beomgyu can tell you’re close, and his kisses become even more heated as he abuses his cock under his hand. he’s moaning into your mouth, showing you, in no uncertain terms, just how badly he wants to be in you instead. 

“let me do it,” he begs. “come around me, instead. it’ll feel so much better.” his dirty words break you out of your trance and you annoyedly shut the vibrator off while tossing it god knows where. you tear his hand away from his cock and mount him, teasingly rubbing yourself against him, but refusing to put it in. he whines and pouts, but you’re far too busy trying to get yourself off to appease him. then, as if he’s possessed, he raises his hips and his tip catches on your entrance. you both gasp at his shallow intrusion. 

“p-please sit on it, it hurts,” he asks rather pathetically. 

“i can’t, beomie. you haven’t even fingered me yet — you’ll break me in half,” you say provocatively. he whimpers at the imagery. “and you've been so bad, how can i let you get what you want? you’ll never learn if i do that.” 

“i’ve learned! i promise, i’ve learned! just, please, help me,” he cries, bucking his hips up and holding your waist so hard you’ll know he’ll leave bruises. 

“mmm, i don’t knowwww,” you drawl.

“please!” and with that, you angle your hips and begin to sink on his thick length. the stretch burns and you can’t help but cry out as you feel your pussy enveloping every inch of him mercilessly. he’s in tears when he feels you throbbing around him, pussy stretching to accommodate how big he is. when you finally, finally take him all in, he can’t help but begin to fuck into you wantonly. 

“b-beomie, slow down!” 

“c-can’t! feels so good,” he says, tears streaming down his pretty face. he grabs your waist even tighter and flips you around so you’re lying beneath him. his cock continues to hammer into you and you’re seeing stars. his mouth is open, drool pooling out of the corners of his lips, and he’s moaning out your name like a prayer.

“pussy so good, so perfect,” he babbles. “missed this. missed feeling you like this.” 

“i missed it too,” you admit. 

“wanted you, wanted you for so long,” he continues. you don’t even think he knows what he’s saying, but you can tell he means every word. he reaches to your stomach and presses down where his cock is ramming into you. your eyes roll back at the pleasure that comes with the pressure. 

“my baby could be in here,” he muses. “our baby.” this should scare you into sobriety, but it does nothing of the sort. you find yourself tightening even further at the thought of him breeding you like a bitch. 

“i’ll take care of you, i swear,” he says as he thrusts so hard your head nearly meets the headboard. “i’ll give you everything you need. sh-shit, baby, wanna fill you up so good you feel me for days,” those words in addition to his sloppy thrusts are what send you over the edge. you clench around him and he hisses at how you’re even tighter than usual. you feel his thrusts become even more sporadic and he’s emptying himself into you unceremoniously. as he softens, he pulls out and you wince at the feeling. to your surprise, he moves down to your pussy and begins to lap up all of the cum like a starving animal. then, he pulls you in for one last nasty kiss. 

-

you don’t know if you necessarily trust beomgyu, but it’s hard not to at least try to when he basically prostrates himself in front of you on a daily basis. he lets you walk all over him, really. if you call him, he comes running. if you’re mad or upset, he soothes you. when you’re being unreasonable, he reasons, anyway. you still haven’t heard from your friends, but you’re starting to accept the fact that you never will. he introduces you to his friends, and surprisingly, they actually welcome you with open arms. apparently, they didn’t like hana very much and knew beomgyu always had a thing for you. you’re not sure how to feel about that, but you’re flattered, nonetheless. 

you call beomgyu crazy, and maybe he is, but he always says it's because he's crazy in love with you. you want to playfully smack him when he says such cheesy words, but you're starting to really believe him.

#supermodel #niningtori #beomgyu smut #beomgyu angst #beomgyu hard thoughts #txt hard hours #txt hard thoughts #txt smut #txt angst #txt x reader #beomgyu x reader #beomgyu hard hours #mdni

[mitsies]

if you were a WAITING ROOM...

-;, things the blue lock boys do when they're crushing ! > based off of the song WAITING ROOM by phoebe bridgers

"IF YOU WERE A TEACHER, I WOULD FAIL YOUR CLASS // TAKE IT OVER AND OVER 'TIL YOU NOTICED ME."

he's not sure why he's doing this. he understands the subject perfectly, maybe even on an advanced level- but he's letting his grades fall.

it's bad, the way he stops turning in work. it's irresponsible, how he starts bubbling in answers incorrectly on purpose. but it's so worth it, with how you begin leaning over his shoulder to double check his answers.

he can't get enough of you, and how you smile sympathetically when he shows you his poor scores on tests, and how you offer to help him after school in the library. and maybe he's crazy for this- he's risking his extracurriculars, his grade point average, his whole education just so you could tutor him. but strangely enough, he can't really find it in himself to care.

he loves how you explain with your hands, how you get so excited when he finally 'grasps' a concept- he loves it all. he thinks he'll risk the summer schooling if it means he gets to see you more often.

; REO, karasu, yukimiya, isagi

"IF YOU WERE A WAITING ROOM, I WOULD NEVER SEE A DOCTOR // I WOULD SIT THERE WITH MY FIRST AID KIT AND BLEED."

he knows he's better than this. he knows he shouldn't be here in the first place. but somehow, he finds himself in your office for the 3rd time that week.

"you need to be more careful," you chide, as you dress the bloodied cut on his ankle. "how does this even happen?"

"not sure," is his reply. he's bashful, unusually so, and he can't meet your eye. your fingers graze his skin and a shiver passes through him.

you're the nurse's apprentice, and coincidentally the prettiest person he's ever seen. he's basically obsessed, infatuated, absurdly so. and he's not the brightest so all he can really do is keep on coming back in the only way he knows how.

you click your tongue and he wonders how your hands would feel in his. "i'm not a huge fan of how you're a regular here, now."

"i thought you'd be happy to see me!"

"i'd be happier under different circumstances."

maybe one day, he'll have the courage to ask you out. but for now? he'll settle for the hospital bed.

; nagi, NANASE, bachira (but... more lively ig), shidou (but more h*rny LMFAO)

"I WANNA BE THE POWER BALLAD THAT LIFTS YOU UP AND HOLDS YOU DOWN."

the party is loud despite the late hour. distantly, he hears one of his friends chatting to him about some cute girls or the food or something he doesn't really care about.

all he can think of at this moment is you. you look unreal in the colorful lighting, your skin painted green and gold beneath the plug-in strobe lights. your smile is nothing short of radiant, and he catches himself fixed on your shiny, painted lips. he wonders if the color you're wearing tastes as good as it looks.

he's not usually the shy type, especially not when it comes to strangers- but the way you glow in the artificial lights makes him breathless.

you don't even know he's there, focused on whatever your friend is telling you. he watches as you cover your mouth and laugh, bumping into their shoulder playfully.

he sighs and downs his drink, preparing to speak to you. he thinks he'll need all the courage he can get. talking to an angel is no easy feat.

; kaiser, oliver, SAE

"I WANNA BE THE BROKEN LOVE SONG THAT FEEDS YOUR MISERY."

his spotify account is the only app open on his laptop. a quiet hum is emitting from it. the song is another one of those dreary, dismal love songs- a genre he's found himself listening to a lot more often as of late.

he pulls up the lyrics to the song and is hit with a swarm of thoughts of you- the lyrics practically speak your name and breathe your image, and something that must be longing is all he can feel.

it's 2 in the morning, and he's alone in his bedroom, and he wishes he was with you instead, because there's no way around it, he's absolutely, positively in love. every song, every sound, conjures the thoughts of you. he can't escape it, he's stuck, and he can't find it in himself to hate it.

but he could never tell you- no, he couldn't risk that. and so he sits on the floor, propped up against his bed, making you another playlist as if he'll ever send it to you.

maybe one day you'll catch on to his hopeful stares, and maybe one day you'll notice that he makes a new playlist of solely love songs whenever you hang out.

but for now, he'll keep on watching. he hums along to the song playing and adds it to the still-growing playlist.

; ISAGI, otoya, hiori

"I WANNA MAKE YOU DRIVE ALL NIGHT // JUST BECAUSE I SAID 'MAYBE YOU SHOULD COME OVER.'"

what time was it again? why was he here? god, he's stupid for this. he knows he shouldn't be here, right now, behind the wheel of his car at 1 in the morning, but he is.

he's got somewhere to be in the morning. he has things to do the following afternoon. he should be asleep, in bed, at home- but he's not, and he can't- not when you called.

5 minutes ago, he received a text from you asking if he was awake and doing anything. for the record, he was just about to head to bed, and in the middle of changing clothes, so he was very much in the middle of something.

but then you'd asked if he could come over, and he knows he could never say no to you.

so here he was, driving on the empty streets towards your apartment on the other side of town. he's stupid, he's delusional, and he's so head-over-heels in love that none of it really matters.

it might be a long drive but he can already see it- your face buried in his chest, his lips on your temple, the off-white color of your bedsheets- and suddenly, he thinks it'll all be worth it.

; kunigami, RIN, karasu, reo

"WANNA MAKE YOU FALL IN LOVE HARD AS MY POOR PARENT'S TEENAGED DAUGHTER."

he hasn't seen you in what, 5 years? 4? not since you were both teenagers with remnants of fat clinging to your cheeks, hot-faced and immature.

then, you'd called him your yours and he'd called you his. it was a typical teenaged relationship, the 99% that wasn't meant to last. at least, not the first time.

because he sees you now, for the first time in what feels like centuries, and he feels like he can breathe again. the neighborhood party is hot and busy but you look lighter than air, just as beautiful as you did the day you'd kissed him in your car and then wished him good luck and goodbye for the last time.

he'd been stupid, then. but he could see it now.

the way you laughed as you greeted his mother with a hug, the way you grinned and knelt down to talk with the new children of the neighborhood the both of you had grown up in- he could see so clearly the love that lingered in your little actions.

and then you looked at him. your eyes grew wide, before you smiled like you used to, and he could practically feel the unbridled affection seeping into his skin.

you were love, he thinks, and he'd let you go.

truly, what a fool he'd been to let you slip through his fingers all those years ago. but now, you're walking towards him, getting closer and more real with every passing second- and he's determined to not make the same mistakes this time.

; chigiri, bachira (hear me out), SAE, oliver

"she'd be the best you ever had, if you let her."

#blue lock x reader #isagi yoichi x reader #itoshi rin x reader #itoshi sae x reader #bachira meguru x reader #chigiri hyoma x reader #kunigami rensuke x reader #oliver aiku x reader #hiori yo x reader #nagi seishiro x reader #reo mikage x reader #bllk x reader #yukimiya kenyu x reader #otoya eita x reader #karasu tabito x reader #karasu tabito #otoya eita #yukimiya kenyu #itoshi rin #itoshi sae #isagi yoichi #bachira meguru #chigiri hyoma #kunigami rensuke #oliver aiku #hiori yo #nagi seishiro #reo mikage #nanase nijiro #nanase nijiro x reader

[tinydeskwriter]

Request: Jack being obsessed with gf reader. Clingy, touchy, jealous, possessive, etc. Constantly has to have her around and gets cranky when she's not.

Mark The Territory

Jack was usually very touchy—almost clingy—, as a rule a part of his body always had to be connected with a part of hers, and it was just with her Y/n learned early in their relationship, he had never been like that with previous girlfriends, at least that's what his friends said, Urban, Jack’s best friend, even once joked that Jack suffered from an Y/n Obsession, which everyone thought was funny, except for Jack himself who blushed when even his girlfriend starts laughing. Whenever they are in the same room he is drawn to her vicinity like a moth to her irresistible flame. No one else even blinks anymore when he pulls her to sit on his lap in the middle of a conversation. Or the way he moves in two seconds if he sees a guy getting too close to Y/n.

They were one of those always touching, always together, teeth-rotting couple.

“Shit, dude.” Urban entered the hotel room. “Metta came out of here cursing you in German, what did you do?”

“He bit her head off, because his outfit isn't all-black and he and Y/n ain’t going to match.” Zack commented bored, while sitting in an armchair, scrolling through his phone. “And he’s grumpy because Y/n is going to meet him at the stadium for the game, and he misses her.” Bia made fun of his friend. “He’s suffering withdrawal.”

“Shut up.” Jack grumbled, finishing the buttons on his dark brown silk shirt.

Yes. He was in a bad mood over his girlfriend's absence.

They had already spent the entire afternoon apart as she had had a photo shoot for a lingerie campaign. And he'd been banned from attending by her manager—just because he'd threatened the photographer in the last photoshoot, it wasn't like the guy didn't deserve it —.

And to worsen his mood, Jack had seen on IG that two of Y/n's ex-boyfriends would be in the game.

He didn't really care about Colson, the guy was engaged and their relationship had ended peacefully, they kept as friends, Y/n even went shopping with Megan.

Jack's problem was the asshole who still DMed her as if he didn't know she was dating him. He didn't have any beef with Gerald till the rapper he collaborated with on the song 'Moana' made it clear he didn't respect his relationship with Y/n.

"C'mon idiots, I don't want to keep my girl waiting." Jack took his cell phone and wallet from the bedside table.

—#—

One of his hand was intertwined with hers over her knee, and the other was playing with his hair. From time to time he would attack her bare neck with his lips—completely aware that he would leave marks—his free hand gently holding her jaw in place, as if she were his prey.

Jack was also aware of the other rapper sitting across the court, apparently unable to take his eyes off his girlfriend.

“Just ignore.” He heard Y/n whisper in her ear, and turned to look at her.

“Hard when he can't stop looking this way.”

“You're the one who's going to take me home… or rather to our hotel room.” Y/n rested her chin on her boyfriend's shoulder. “While he's the guy who messed up all his relationships and he's going back to a big empty house.”

“How did you know….” He turned to face her in time to see her roll her eyes.

“Please Jack, give me some credit, I know you.” She said. “And since you arrived, all that's left is for you to piss on me to mark your territory.”

Jack blushes.

And then he heard Zack and Urban choke on their drink.

Assholes. That's what you get by listening to other people's conversation.

“I'm yours Jack, there's no reason for you to be jealous or feel insecure, Gerald, Colson, all the other guys are in the past, none of them made me feel the way you do.” Y/n kisses her boyfriend just as the kissing cam focused on the couple.

#jack harlow concepts #jack harlow imagines #jack harlow imagine #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow blurbs #jack harlow x y/n #jack harlow #jack harlow x oc

[jiijux]

Forever in your heart.

-Male reader x Light Yagami -sad ig?

summary: L and Soichiro found out about your relationship with Light in a way that they almost feel bad about your feelings towards Light.

-December 22, 2003

As L were looking through the cameras, he saw that Light had gone back home from school and he expected everything to go like normal but he noticed that there's an individual next to Light while holding an umbrella. He knew that the whether was rainy today and he can understand that Light didn't brought an umbrella with him but what interest L is he never seen this individual before. Was it just another classmate of his? they look like they known each other for a while until he hears Soichiro speaking to him.

From what he heard about the individual from Soichiro, they're really close friends but Soichiro rarely seen the guy often now ever since this Kira case took place, this statement almost made L a bit suspicious that there's a potential of the guy might know some information about the Kira case but he ignored that thoughts and focus on what they're observing right now.

L notices their mouth moves and he assumed they're talking so he listens carefully, maybe there's potential lead to the case to find evidence. But what they talk about is the opposite of what L's expected.

"You're awfully quiet now." (M/n)

"Maybe it's because I'm worried about the Kira case, after all my father is working on the case." (Light)

"I know that, but you're different from what I remember now. Did something happened?" (M/n)

"Nothing happened, everything went just like how it is.." (Light)

"..." (M/n)

L could see the face of (M/n) changing to slight dissapointed as if he know something and the fact that Light is lying to his face but L sees how (M/n) was desperate.

"We're different individuals with different path and future, but just what if I change in the future that is on the negative side? Would you still like me?" (Light)

That statement both shocks L and Soichiro knowing Light would say something like that even towards the same gender, what L notices is Light's expression when he says that. He can't described how it looks like but it feels genuine that it's almost hard to believe someone like Light would say it. But both weren't prepared to what (M/n) replies.

"No matter if we go seperate ways and in our own path, I know that you're always forever in my heart. If it meant to always remember you for the rest of my life." (M/n)

L and Soichiro didn't expect for the two of them to have some sort of relationship but who's even more shocked is Soichiro, after all this time; he never notices the relationship between the two of them and he didn't think it would go that far. But L ask Soichiro if it's fine for Light to have a thing for guy's and he expected Soichiro to immediately be angry about it like how it usually goes since Japan homosexual isn't normalised in Japan yet. Surprisingly Soichiro was completely neutral on this matters and was in fact for dissapointed that he didn't knew this side of his son, seeing this side of him is what shocked him completely.

But it seems like both Lights and (M/n) conversation hasn't ended yet to their suprise.

"Just maybe if this Kira thing didn't happened then I wouldn't be able to let out how I truly feels." (M/n)

"Would you still do it if you feel like you need to?" (Light)

"I don't know, what we know is that there's just something in between us. I wouldn't hesitate to cut our friendship if you want us to." (M/n)

"What, no.. I don't.." (Light)

"?" (M/n)

L was suprise (M/n) would go that far just to keep their friendship just friends and forget about everything. Either way, from what L observed, (M/n) seems to cherished Light so much without the other boy knowing. L will admit, this feels like something straight out of a romance drama.

"There's just been much going on.. Maybe when the world become a better place, I'll tell you."

L seems to be focused on the word "better place." Just what did Light meant by that? It was clear now L suspicion of Light being Kira was correct, but he didn't have enough evidence to prove it and using only a CCTV is not enough.

"A better place?" (M/n)

It seems that (M/n) also gets it about Light's word but L feels that (M/n) hides his suspicion from Light to don't get it in the way of their friendship, L almost felt bad for (M/n). While Soichiro just can only stare at the screen without saying anything after their conversation has ended.

And that might be the first and last time both L and Soichiro ever witnessed Light interactions with the guy.

#light yagami x male reader #light yagami #death note #dn light #light yagami x reader #male reader #light yagami x you #dn lawliet #l death note #l lawliet #x reader #x male reader

[fizzing-imagines]

Playtime Pt. 2 | Daycare Teacher! Billy Hargrove x Reader

Warnings: Giving birth ig?

Words: 1.3k

"I'm gonna keep it...just so you know.", you mumbled after a while. Your fingers were playing with the hem of your shirt while preparing yourself for what he might say. "And I wanna be in it's life, so we got that figured out.", he said while looking out of the window. "Just...the co-parent thing." You let out a "Mhm." in response. "I mean, you're not ugly. I'd date you, if you let me." He looked over to you, and what he said honestly made you laugh. "Charming.", you commented. "Honestly Billy, I'm a lot. I've got severe mental health issues and a best friend you need to get through beforehand." He shrugged his shoulders. "Sweetheart, I have diagnosed PTSD. It's not much easier with me." He gave you a smirk and you laughed once more. "Wanna trauma-bond?"

Billy took you out every other day, doing his best to keep it hidden from Ari. Jenny, of course, knew about it. But you didn't need Ari to tell everyone at daycare. He went to every appointment he could with you, got you whatever you craved and touched you like you were made of porcelain. Nobody has ever been softer with you than Billy was. "I'm trying to make you mine before he or she pops out.", he said to you once, and he would be damed if that wouldn't work. But judging by how it was going, he was going to reach that goal.

"You're a mechanic?", he asked you in disbelief one evening. Your head was resting on his lap while the two of you were watching the stars. "Pretty damn good one, too.", you added with a proud grin. "I've always liked cars. My brothers couldn't be fucked to help my dad with his car, so I always did. And in high school, I decided to make my hobby my career." Billy gave you a low hum while stroking your head. "Wanted to be a mechanic too.", he said. "But I taught swimming to kids when I was a teenager, so I took that road from there on out." You listened to him carefully, then added a "I'm happy you took that road." once he finished. He smiled down at you while tucking your hair behind your ear. "Now that you mentioned your family", Billy started. Shit. "did you tell them yet? About the baby?" Billy would find out eventually, he couldn't know that it was a bad topic for you. "All dead.", you said while looking back at the stars. "They died of carbon monoxide poisoning on Thanksgiving three years ago." Billy felt guilty for asking. "Oh...I'm sorry, sweetheart.", he said. You shrugged and said "It's okay, you didn't know." Now that he mentioned it, you were curious as well. "Did you tell them?" He looked away for a second, clearly thinking about something. "Max knows, and she's actually surprisingly excited to be an aunt." He smiled at those words. Max was his step-sister, you knew that much after seeing a picture of the two at his place. "I don't talk to the others anymore. Too much trauma." You reached out for his hand and took it into yours. "I'm sorry, Billy.", you said before placing a kiss on his knuckles. He smiled at you, was silent for a few seconds and then said "You know what would make me feel better?". It was odd how quickly he could change topics, but you knew that that was what trauma can do to people. "What?", you asked with a smile on your face. "If I could kiss you." Your cheeks flushed at his request, but you didn't need to think much about your answer. "I'd like that.", you replied with a smile. Billy leaned down, held your face carefully with one hand and kissed you softly.

This went on for months. Whenever you two didn't see each other for more than three days, Billy felt like he was going insane. As soon as he had you in his arms again, he'd greet you and then the baby with a kiss. When the two of you were at his apartment, he talked to the baby for hours. He knew so much about children and how they develop, but seeing his own child grow was so much different. Unfortunately, he couldn't be there when you found out the babies sex, but you were buzzing to tell him. "Not that I won't love a boy, but I'd be ecstatic to have a little princess.", he said to you while resting his hands on your growing stomach. You put your hands in top of his with a smile across your face. "It's a girl, Billy." Your voice was soft, causing him to almost melt on the spot. Once again he pulled you into a hug, a long one, and you swore you felt a tiny wet spot on your shirt. "Shit, you've made me the happiest man alive.", he whispered. You smiled while patting his back. "I believe I can make you even happier.", you said after a while. He let go of you and looked at you with a slightly confused facial expression. "Be my boyfriend. Please?" Now he was grinning ear-to-ear, but instead of hugging you he leaned forwards and kissed you. Of course, you happily gave into the kiss. He leaned his forehead against yours once you broke the kiss. "Nobody ever made me as happy as you did, sweetheart.", he whispered. "I love you. And our princess.". You could feel some tears forming in your eyes at his words. "I love you, too. Both of you." Your voice was shaky, vibrating in both love and adoration.

Next month, the two of you already moved in together. He didn't let you do any of the heavy lifting, saying he'd do it so you won't hurt yourself or the baby. It only took two more months after that until your baby girl was born. She decided that it was her time while Billy was in the middle of his work day, changing a full diaper that was already leaking. "Gotta get used to this, won't I?", he cooed at the small boy on the changing table. The toddler giggled at his tone, showing a toothless grin. "Billy?" His coworker was frantically looking for him. "Billy?" She looked into every room, every corner until she finally found him in the bathroom where he was putting on a new diaper at this point. "Billy!", she said while skipping inside. "What's up?", he asked without looking up. "Your girlfriend called, she's in labour.", she said out of breath. He stopped in his tracks and looked up at her. "What? Well, can I leave? What do I do now?" Now he was panicking. Can he just go? Does he have to finish the day? "Don't just stand there, go!", she rushed him while changing positions with him. He's never rushed out of work faster, quickly grabbing his things and starting his car. Luckily, you two talked about in which hospital you'd give birth before. The 15-minute drive only took him 10 minutes, then he was already rushing through the entrance and was lead to you. To his relief, you weren't in much pain yet as you were given pain killers.

Your daughter truly didn't want to wait anymore, as she was born two hours after Billy's arrival. While there were complications and she had to be delivered via C-Section, Audrey was born healthy. While you rested up, he held her close to his chest and cooed at her to make her feel better. To Billy, she was the most beautiful and precious girl in the world.

And he'd be dammed if anything happened to his new family.

#billy hargrove #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargrove fluff

[riverblujay]

You just reblogged my FHSY post with some EXCELLENT tags and I wanted to say you're so right the pair the spare stuff was bizarre. I ended up liking where Sandra Lynn and Jawbone went in SY but at the end of FY it's so weird. Also I'm following you now because you're a self proclaimed Murph girlie and SPMGs like us need to stick together

(aforementioned tags)

ty bestie!!

truly TRULY the worst part of FY for me. like, i super get that they were trying to wrap stuff up after having a super intense combat, so i also don't, like, hold it against d20 that much?? and maybe it would be even less tasteful to me if we didn't have icon and aroace ally murph (and brennan ig but murph like. INITIATED this plot line) giving us Allo/Amatonormativity Personified as baron.

fwiw, im not 100% romance repulsed either. and i GET that teen romance is part of the genre they're trying to convey in fh!! i just think maybe it should have been limited to the teens, at the very least in FY. it's SO awkward and personally i think reads as "brennan had some (head)canons abt who got together with who, eventually, but it's the last episode so there's no time to seed that in a graceful way if he wants his two cents out there." which is his right to have ideas for who among the adults get together, but like--the entire focus of the whole season was the bad kids, not their parents. so it feels weird when your thoughts abt who ends up dating, even if there is SO MUCH context and build up in brennan's head, are presented as a loose thread being tied up in a bow.

ignoring my complicated and by no means exhaustive feelings/rambling on the topic, if you have not listened to naddpod yet i cannot recommend it enough!!!! yes im a murph girlie and i LOVE his dm style (recently saw a comment on a post saying naddpod has less patrons than wbn bc "brennan is a better dm" and it made me FERAL. i get it i shouldn't have read the comments in the first place, and also you (the commenter) hate consequences and dope encounters. literally no one can say a DROP of MURPH SLANDER unless they have listened to eldermourne finale AND c3e27 the king of dragons. combat and encounter design dm of all time FR!!!!)

but i just love how despite naddpods tight editing, you can tell just how much murph, emily, caldwell, and jake care abt each other both as people and as their pcs. emily has literally said the way jake INSTANTLY decided that hardwon loved the crick made her feel always welcome at a table with him. how much the cast makes each other laugh, or cry, or feel any kind of emotion.

ALSO moonshine is SO aroallo coded to me. axmurph aspec allies fr fr. naddpod dnd podcast of all time in my heart <3

#dimension 20 #d20 #fantasy high #naddpod #idk its a lot to ask but. no one take any of this out of proportion/in bad faith yknow?? #its like. not THAT big a deal #just. smth that grates on me from time to time #i hate hate hate 'pair the spares' as a trope as a dynamic in general etc etc #you can have meaningful char dynamics without making every possible relationship inherently romantic! for no reason!! #figayda is fh romance done right #vs parental romances in FY #like. JUST BC fig and riz tried to set up sklonda and gilear doesnt mean u have to set up almost every significant adult npc!!! #...... sometimes i DO get a little bitter but its not a huge thing in the grand scheme. like. its canon there is nothing i can do #except for ignore it and live in my little aro world where the romance that DOES exist has strong reason/foreshadowing/is justified <3 #didnt mean to Go Off but this ask was SUCH a prime opportunity lol. ty for agreeing w/me and my lightly salted aro takes haha

[ticklepinions]

Leave me be

So yeah same friend. Whatever. Enjoy my suffering. Feet tickles is coloured orange.

My tummy- I didn't realize it was that ticklish. I can not stay still whatsoever...

So she wrapped her legs around my own and basically started poking me.

The way she was just making jokes saying things like "my money don't jiggle jiggle, it folds" because I so happened to curl up rather uh violently

But ugh I make post about this later but tickles are even more fun when everyone is already laughing because of a joke that was said or something

"Are you ready for... The cLaWwW?" No I was not ready

I noticed that I never tell her to like stop. I usually just scream instead lmfao. Or the classic apologizing (if I provoked her or sumthin)

She was just laughing at my reactions the entire time bro. Mean as hell

Thigh traces are honestly what the f!ck. They tickle so bad you don't even know. She was just tracing them and I was laughing like crazy. I hate it here

At one point we were cuddling as we do, me being the lil spoon ofc and she just lifted up my shirt to like tickle my tummy and it was this whole endurance thing 😩 cause she said tickles are a mental game and you can just will it away or whatever. It did not work. The element of surprise always wins. Always.

She also spent LOTS of time just tracing my back, specifically my shoulder blades cause she was like how is it sticking out like that. Skinny people problem ig idk. But she kept poking into it and it tickled really bad but it also felt like a massage so rip

Anyways I had fun, maybe I like being bullied a lil bit by people I appreciate

Now listen. I do this thing where I pretend things don't tickle when they do. As I said before she was tracing my thighs and I was like it feel so weird and she said "oh it tickles? Does it feel ticklish? Because I'm tickling you?" She said the word one too many times bro-

I was laying on my stomach and she raised my arms just enough to simply place her hands under my arms and I honestly flipped out. I did this embarrassing squeal and it's late at night so we're both silently laughing to ourselves

She even tickled my feet and she was literally giggling up a storm because she was like "oh you're doing a lil Irish jig. Dance for me *increases the tickles*"

#storytime with onion

[brainworms-all-night-long]

hi it’s tornadopilot from my main. what are your thoughts on tails’ attempts to win kit over in a similar manner to how sonic deals with his own rivals and his clear masked frustration and disappointment that it wasn’t working . you can SEE the effort he was putting in you can see how bad tailswanted it to work out and then it didn’t. WHAT r ur thoughts on that kit and surge drive me nuts

Ahahaa I'm sorry it took so long for me to respond but I kinda had half a book written before realizing I got side tracked to a completely different topic so I had to rewrite most of this and even despite that I'm not completely satisfied with the result but so is the way of my brain ig

-–-–-–-–-–-•-–-–-–-–-–-

Tails would absolutely definitely take after and look to Sonic as a model of his mannerisms as he was basically raised by the blue blur. But it's also more than obvious that Sonic trying to peacefully reach out to Surge with talkings of freedom and friendship won't work and he needs a different strategy.

And I feel that the same case is with Kit, because while he's much more open to reason and doesn't fight unless he has to (even than he's quite easily swayed from doing so) he also doesn't belive the words of anyone who isn't Surge. Especially now at the end of issue 56 with his trust broken by Sonic twice.

While common ground could be struck with conversation, it has the stability of a card house built outdoors because one wrong word or slightly off action could sent all the progress crumbling to pieces

And using that card house allegory further, what you need to do for increasing its stability is change the location of where you're trying to make it to ensure no stray breeze is gonna knock it over and than also make sure there won't be anyone nagging you constantly and threatening to tarnish all your progress if you don't indulge them

But that is the problem. Surge as the one threatening to topple the card house over is probably definitely not gonna let up and Kit won't be functional without her, which makes the poor fennec stuck between two watermills of knowing he has to be there for Surge but but also not wanting to follow her into fights she picks with everyone else around her. Starline hammered it in his brain that he doesn't get to have an identity and only serve as a sidekick to Surge. But how good of a sidekick is he when he's so easily swayed form helping her in a basically life or death fight she had with the sonics in the old base by Tails, as in his own enemy he was specificaly designed to destroy.

In a hypothetical universe where Surge did die back than in the garbadge place that I forgor the details off and Kit were to be left with he heroes, he would just end up feeling.. useless. Because even if he undoubtedly sees Surge in Sonic and tries to just follow his programing by listening to orders and doing his best to protect the blue blur, the moment he'd look at Tails, he'd get his purpose undermined. Tails is someone who he was ment to replace, to eliminate. And yet the fox remains a better version of himself. A version of himself far more capeable of doing the job of prottecting and assisting his speedster while he just let...Surge.. die.

A silly detail I noticed is that Kit has no second thoughts about attacking Sonic (or at least attempting to) when the situation calls for it. After Surge's fight in central city, he is sent into a shortlived fit of rage, in which, if not straight up kill, than definitely at least wanting to infilict some serious harm to sonic when feeling betrayed seeing him fight Surge, after not so long ago he was told by the same hedgehog that she died (oh god I could make an en etire post just centering around kit's shattered thought process in between those two plot points oh mans the worms are braining again agh-) And same in the second big fight they had, Kit was going straight after sonic but the second, the god damn second Tails steps in, he retreats.

This is not a case of Kit not being able to or strong enough to inflic damage with his powes. I mean hell, he easily cut trough metal chains with those water tentacles one issue before that. What could possibly be stoping him from tearing both Tails and Sonic limb from limb.

-–-–-–-–-–-•-–-–-–-–-–-

Hhhhh that's as far as my thoughts go without fully venturing into headcannon territory, just making random stuff up ooor completely derailing from the topic,

There's like two more paragraphs that I've written but couldn't really manage to reformulate or fit anywhere here because my brain refuses to cooperate but I don't want to erase them so here they are;

> What i think would make Kit tick (hehe funni words) would first and foremost be actions, not words. All they need is acceptance but unfortunately they can't have it because they're hardwired to kill those tha are constantly offering it to them and are harming every one in their path which only results in minimizing anyone else trying to reach out to them. 'Sonic and Tails were "heroes" after all, obviously they would try to manipulate them to the "good side" with empty promisses of care and love. they're valuable and strong assets after all.' or so that little leftover of starlines voice lingering around in their head would tell them.

-–-–-–-–-–-○-–-–-–-–-–-

> By that I'm not implying that Kit doesn't care about Surge in the slightest, theres definitely a kind and carying nature towards everyone burried somewhere uder all his programing, it's just that right now only centered on Surge and who knows just how much of it is actually genuine or Stockholm sydrom even. Nontheless After the Central city fight he brings him and surge back to Starline's old base, thinking of it as the last safe space they potentially have. Surge is haunted by visions of the fruity ahh platypus and Kit not really knowing what to do in that moment just hugs her, apologizing for beliving Sonic for even a second and for leaving her. And even before that earnestly being relieved and happy that Surge is fine. There has to be at lest some smidget of genuine care for her (Perhaps once they do recieve their much needed thraphy they could become just as inseparable as Tails and Sonic). Also reiterating this point again for the Nth time; Kit never shows the desire or even willingness to fight until theres absolutely no other option.

#sonic idw #i just kept writing a character analysis of Kit and Surge istg #who knows once I replenish my thoughts juice Ill be able to write out something like that #but if we aver get an actual interaction between Tails and Kit that isnt just about trying to stop the latter from being silly #i think it would mostly be like kit: what the hell are you doing??? #tails: giving you affection and understanding! #kit: why in the fuck would you do that?! #kit: ... keep doing that tho #but that would be me on my kitails thoughts #tails the fox #miles tails prower #kitsunami the fennec #kit idw #surge idw #surge the tenrec #sonic #sonic the hedgehog #silly brainworms #ask

[seakicker]

me when literally everyone else: mmf yes so hot so sexy,,,, stretch marks? scars? moles? love it love it love it FUCK so sexy! I love love love tummy and boobs and big boobs and small boobs and boobs that are perky but also boobs that abide by gravity and boobs that spread out and I love love love chub and thick thighs and cellulite fuck it’s all so sexy I love I love I love I love feminine men I love big masculine men I love it all

me when myself: god I’m so ugly why

It could be because I’m trans especially because there’s good days and bad days but damn I hate parts of myself I KNOW I would drool over on other people. I draw people with my exact body type and lust and lust and lust and then I try to indulge myself and draw self-ship art but. I feel like I’m ugly or that the character I’m with wouldn’t like me EVEN THOUGH I KNOW THEY WOULD? Maybe it’s a confidence issue maybe it’s my dysphoria but that other anon talking about their experience with their commission and asshole artist reminded me of this damn dilemma. I love y/n fanfic so much cause it’s easier to forget myself and what I look like in the first person but damn. I hate myself in art and photos so much and I don’t even know why. Sorry if u didn’t really want to hear this in ur inbox lmao but ig this is the best place to vent into ahah

—⌚️

hello my sweet, thank you for coming to me and pls dont feel like you should apologize for venting here, it's part of what i'm here for and i like being able to listen. ik lots and lots of people, formerly myself (and still me on some days) included get that "i love my features on everyone else but hate them on myself" because i think that's just the nature of insecurity-- you feel like other people are "doing it right" or that things just look better on other people than they do on you. it's much easier to hold yourself to an impossible standard like beauty standards than it is to hold other people to the same standards, if that makes sense... any good person will know to not judge others but that doesn't stop you from judging yourself, you're your own worst critic. one thing that always kinda comforted me is knowing that i've never actually seen myself-- you only see yourself through mirrors and pictures but that's not really you, your camera doesn't capture real life dimensions and everything is flipped in the mirror, that sort of thing. you never see yourself, at least not in the way you look at other people, but i'm sure if you could see yourself through someone else's eyes (as the ol saying goes) you'd be surprised how fine/attractive/wonderful you look to everyone else. i can't comment on the dysphoria aspect so i can't offer any advice as far as that goes, but i think knowing that i'm not alone in my insecurity has always helped me so i try to remind other people that they're not alone in their insecurity too. the things that i don't like about myself are only because i'm my own worst critic and bc i hyperfocus on my flaws rather than the things i like about myself, and i think that's how it goes for a lot of people. but the things you like about yourself are more important than anything else!

another thing that's helped me is following models/influencers/etc that have my body type and similar features as me, ie thick eyebrows and a lil toothgap, and unfollowing models/influencers that i struggle with comparing myself to. your internet experience is yours to curate and there's nothing wrong with unfollowing models that you can't help but compare yourself to; it doesnt mean theyre a bad person or bodyshaming or anything, just that they may not be healthy for your experience and that's alright! so maybe that could help you too. i wish u the best of luck and i thank you for sharing your feelings with me; i think you're wonderful no matter what and i'm happy to be a place where you feel comfortable sharing your feelings and fantasies!

#i luve u #chats #⌚️ anon #tw insecurity

[fairycosmos]

hi baby i am losing my mind at home. and mybe im in the wrong. my mom got a new bf since maybe two months and the same day she told me about him, i met him, and that weekend he was there the whole time. and now, that was a month ago, he basically is here constantly. am i being a cunt for being annoyed by this? i love that shes happy, but her last husband was very toxic and made me feel very uncomfortable and unsafe so i am not at ease at all with a pretty much complete stranger in my house. i told her how i felt about it, and she blew up at me calling me egocentric and selfish and made me feel in general very very the odd one out, and like i was not allowed to feel that way. i asked her, after having a full blown panic attack in front of her, to try and keep in mind that when im at home (which is not much considering im in college and only here every few weeks for two days) to at least let me know if he’ll be here, and preferably just not. which she didnt, again, this weekend. i really dont know what to do. bc i really dont feel at home and like im wanted here and ignored and in general very anxious. the guy isnt bad or whatever, but its the same pattern from with her ex where her relationship became more important than me and this whole thing is so incredibly triggering. ig the answer is just a very simple ‘dont go home’ but i am so desperate for recognition and i just want to feel seen by her. i just dont know how to be fine with having a mom that doesnt want me. im really sorry this is so long. i hope youre doing okay <3

hi lovely - im sorry to hear this. it sounds so fucking frustrating and honestly i don't think your reaction is unreasonable at all! there is an appropriate way to introduce your kids to your boyfriend and this is definitely not it, especially if you've had a bad experience with her partners in the past. it is incredibly unfair and childish of her to blow up at you and to have him spend the whole weekend at your place the first weekend you guys met. like, no wonder you feel upset and overwhelmed by it all. it's not a great way to get to know each other, and her disregard for your feelings is awful.

it sounds like you've tried everything you can to set the right boundaries and to communicate clearly and respectfully what you're feeling with her, and of course if you want to you should keep trying to get through to her, but i think it's important to know when it's time to protect your own peace and focus on what is actually in your control. it's totally natural to crave feeling seen and recognised by her, like as much of a human need as eating or sleeping is, but if she's not able to give that you you don't need to internalise it as something that is your fault or something you deserve. it is entirely a reflection of her and her fucked up priorities if she refuses to listen and to amend her own behaviour. like it's obviously ok for her to date, and she doesn't need your permission, but she is not being respectful of your space at all, and that is the problem. i know accepting that is incredibly difficult, and it may take a long time to be able to say “hey, i deserve better than this and i will not beg for her validation, or for her to grow up and act like an adult about things,” but that really is the bottom line. if you still want to go home often, which is obviously completely understandable, maybe you could work on just setting your own boundaries within the house - staying in your room, only engaging with the dude/your mother to the extent that you feel comfortable with, even just straight up communicating to the guy that you're not really used to having him around and you're trying to take things at your own pace. if either of them get offended by that, honestly it's on them. they clearly haven't been considering your feelings so it's ok to just do what's right for yourself at this point. i'm really sorry you're in this position and i hope it gets better with time, that they begin to hear you out and give you room to breathe and process etc etc. i guess i just wanted to offer some genuine understanding, because you're not being ridiculous at all - i think your mam kind of is. also, if there's anyone you can talk to at school about this - like a mate or a college counsellor, i'd really recommend it. i know it might feel really weird and vulnerable to be open about it, but it's an issue you're dealing with and you deserve to feel supported. just processing it out loud and getting someone's outside perspective might be really cathartic and validating. i don't know, no pressure obviously - just smth to consider. sending a hug your way. x

#anon

[theveil-and-thepath]

Hii hun<3 hope u r doing fine.

I'd like to know abt what type of person I am in real life... Coz ik and I feel I hv my walls up as my defense mechanism... Ig my inner child is highly wounded... I need healing n I'm working on it... I always feel like I hv put a mask over my real self for so long that it is getting hard for even me myself to recognise my true self... Can u plss help me to know abt the real real me(like both dark/shadow side and soft/spiritual side)

You can skip it tho if u want to~

Thankyou sm🤍

~SM

Hi, SM! I hope you're doing better now.

When I asked you question, the cards took a while to come out and the first one that came was the seven of pentacles. Then, I got the queen of pentacles and the two of cups. What comes to me is that you're someone who is looking for a solid ground to stand on, you're craving earth energy, something secure and certain. The things associated with the sign of Taurus make sense here, because you need a comforting environment to flow, to let your emotions show to others.

The shuffluing made me feel like it will be a long journey of self discovery, you won't see change quickly but only notice it when you look back some years and compare to how much you've changed. You're true self comes to me as someone who works at their own pace, taking solid steps, not wanting to build a house over sand. You won't open up to anyone because you feel like 'why bother, if they can leave or if our connection will lose importance and they won't care for my feelings, they will forget me, they think of this as fleeting thing'. You need to be shown tolkens of afection, shown real actions that make you feel safe and somewhat stable. Your true self needs something solid to develop, otherwise you feel like building castles in the air.

Your true self likes to protect people and care for them, you value a fair exchange of emotions and you don't want to settle for half of what someone can give you. The long quest you'll have in life is look for this safe place and at fisrt you will look for it in other people. The right people will come along, but to discover your true self you need to feel like you can trust in yourself to provode the things you need. You will keep trying your best to get away of old stressors and old trauma environments, this is how growing up feels like and trying to be mature and fighting to be able to determine your own fate (which is hard bc external circunstances often block us or delay this process). All of this can manifest in an unbalanced way, but if you stop for a second before acting you should be fine and be able to live at your best behaviour. I really don't feel bad things to say to you know, it looks like you can be balanced enough when looking for security and for people who value you as much as you value them.

One thing I do feel is hidden from you is your ability to renew yourself. You are awar of it I believe, but not to the extent you have it in you, you can change and your past will not leave a stain on you, don't see your past as stains that can't be erased, the past leaves a mark but try not to see it as an undesireble stain that you scrub out by force. Your favourite clothes can have holes and be well preserved, try not to see the past as a bad thing. You probably are in the right way already, so just take this message as a reinforcement.

Your real self will come out of its shell slowly, and you will build yourselves together, you have your entire life ahead.

p.s.: i'm listening to this very calm music right now and these days, i recommend it! (3:33 hours long music, mostly instrumental and some vocals)

Love,

Veil

#The Veil replies

[r-shizzle]

So I recently took a break from my main socials (FB, IG, & TikTok) because I wanted to address the recurring dread that I've been experiencing for quite a while now.

There's always been this feeling that I kind of feel lost and lonely despite meeting new people, having new experiences, and taking certain risks to change my life.

I took a while for me to come to this point, but I realized that what's been missing from me all this time is passion.

Ever since I've gone to college, I felt like I had to set aside my interests to actively participate in society. It seems that it went on well onto adulthood, where my decisions became largely influenced by stability, upskilling, and financial security.

But don't get me wrong— I am proud of myself for that. I will always be grateful that I have this level of grind to give myself the life that would actually keep me safe from toxic circles ans underpaying jobs.

I've learned how to embrace routine and the mundane. I would sometimes find myself thankful that I've come so far from the struggles that used to burden me.

But then, it seems that I have lost my lust for life—and that's where everything began.

I remember having a dreadful thought back when I was in high school on how life seems to be a series of going through the hopes; how after I graduate school I would work, and after I've secured a stable job I would need insurance, savings, and investments; and then I would need to help the fame, then have a husband and give birth to two children, and then buy a house and a car, and then claim my pension until I die.

Or maybe I will keep checking out stuff that I can spend on, go on trips that keep me booked, go on dates that I can allot time for, and talk to people so I don't have to deal with myself. At least, that's how most adults do it.

But idk, it just felt banal & overwhelming at the same time. It felt like I was only meant to tick boxes on my to-do list forever.

It was clear yet I didn't know: I was having an existential crisis.

I honestly didn't know what to do. I thought I might be mildly depressed so I tweaked my morning routine to include affirmations and write things down on a gratitude journal. I was in such a decent place in life so what do I need to be sad about anyways?

It wasn't until a few weeks ago when I watched Crimson Peak and signed up for a new Tumblr account that I felt the fire inside me spark once more.

I started watching TV shows again, and just recently I listened to a song that really makes me want to dance:

It was crazy. I almost forgot how much I loved dan cing.

I immediately looked up a dance class that I can take this week and I'm doing it.

And that's where it all clicked in.

For me, life is inherently meaningless and it is up to us to define it. Our purpose may or may not be driven by a grand cause and that's totally fine. But what matters is that you build a life that excites you, shapes you in the person that you're confident to become, and lights a fire deep within your soul. Indeed, it highlights your indomitable spirit.

And the catch? You don't even have to spend big bucks on it. It just has to be something that you will keep looking forward to that it drowns out the dread of the mundane.

Suddenly, being alone and doing mindless tasks isn't so bad.

Since it felt a lot like a wake up call, things started to make sense for me why sometimes people do what they're doing even it doesn't seem logical.

Whether it's a low-paying job, a thankless role, you name it. If it's illogical, they're probably passionate.

#ramblings #text #my first text post! yay #Spotify

[orbleglorb]

i guess i should make an intro!

hi! i'm wyatt. i'm 17, and i use he/they pronouns. i also go by sammy! either name works, but most people just call me wyatt, and that's the name i use IRL as well. i've had this blog for a while (over a year? i had one in 2019 and then deleted it at some point, and idk when i made this one!) but i think i'll be more active here now because tumblr's interface feels more user friendly. who knows, tho ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

some info about me and this account (a BYF, i guess):

this is a very general purpose blog. i will post all sorts of crap here. from fanart to serious topics to cats with ridiculous names! i don't repost serious things too often (i don't think, anyway).

most of my posts are just reblogs! i don't have a large audience so i don't feel the need to make posts. i know you have to make posts to have a large audience, but i'm fine with a smaller audience as well. im just in my own silly little environment

i'm on social media for my own enjoyment, which means i will post as little or as much as i feel like at the moment! i will also block people for small or silly reasons (like, if i don't like the stuff they post, even if it's not problematic).

if anyone else remembers framecast/drawcast hmu because sometimes i wonder if that was just something i dreamt

FEEL FREE TO SEND ME PICS OF UR ANIMALS ANYTIME

please don't feel bad if i don't watch/listen to/read something you suggest. i have a huge huge huge list of things i need to watch, read, listen to, play, etc. i have not crossed off a single thing. i really just suck at getting into new content for some reason

that being said, i think learning about a piece of media through a person that really really likes it is much more enthralling than actually looking into it myself. so feel free to rant to me about things!

give me ur ocs this is a threat

i have my own ocs that i may post about from time to time! feel free to ask me about them. please.

i don't know half the shit that goes on in the online world. if i follow someone who is problematic, just assume i don't know anything because i probably don't!

if anyone needs me to give photo IDs/transcriptions of images i post, don't hesitate to ask! i'll gladly add one on

i can't read most fancy fonts. i know some (like zalgo text) are made with the intention to be incomprehensible, but if you use a fancy font (such as over-the-top cursive, some gothic/medieval fonts, or ɑׁׅ֮ꪀׁׅᨮ꫶ׁׅ֮tׁׅhׁׅ֮ꪱׁׅꪀׁׅᧁׁ ᥣׁׅ֪ꪱׁׅƙׁׅ֑ꫀׁׅܻ tׁׅhׁׅ֮ꪱׁׅ꯱ׁׅ֒ (anything like this), i will not be able to read it! a translation or caption would be nice if you use one of these fonts, but it's probably not something i'll unfollow you over

i use parentheses often (because how else will i communicate vital information in an easy and concise manner?)

that's it for disclaimers, i think! here's some of my interests:

five nights at freddys :(

the walten files

blaseball

my ocs!!

stardew valley

pre-2010s microsoft windows operating systems

will i get laughed off of this website if i say purble place? bc yeah

homestuck (im sorry)

anything with convoluted lore ig

backrooms/"liminal spaces" (idk why they're called liminal spaces, which is why there's quotation marks around them) (also i don't know shit about the backrooms lore i just like empty places that fill me with dread)

so yeah!!

i guess everyone is doing "before you follow" and "don't interact" warnings. i pretty much did a byf up at the top. but here's a dni ig:

DNI: proshippers. i think that's it really

YCIBYOTI (you can interact but you're on thin ice): tiktok kids y'all scare the crap out of me. genshin fans (i call y'all genshpacters so don't be surprised by that). danganronpa fand. again i don't want to tell people who like those things not to follow me, because no group of ppl are a monolith and there's definitely a bunch of people who don't live up to the stereotypes. but i am Slightly Wary of y'all. this isn't a hardcore "don't interact" but more like "proceed with caution & please don't tap the glass because it scares the animals (me)"

that's it!

a picture of my cat, for your troubles

ok cya 👋

[lundilalune]

some days i drown in a really heavy sort of negativity and just can't seem to escape it... like i genuinely hate myself and hate that i do and especially the fact that i can't really just Fix that,,,,eugghhh it's a really rough feeling but sometimes I'm just cranky bc im hungry/sleepy? still tho,,, it's such a painnn

#listening to loud music with a strong bass/kinda deep-hitting beat??? helps sometimes #like it fixes the wrong way my heart beats...or something?? #i hate listeningg to happy songs when im feelin fucked up bc it makes me feel even more alone n like everyone is mocking me #but sometimes i can't stand slow and sad songs and i just want my head to shut up/i want to be distracted but not really with happy things?? #like i want those feelings to be acknowledged instead of being brushed aside/fitting this feeling of just barely holding it together #or just living with the pain #also: one of the worst feelings is feeling like I'm being ignored #it's dumb and irrational but i really start Believing that people hate me so much so easily #and feeling ignored soooo makes that worse...like i just start thinking shit like #oh they don't care about me they don't care at all they hate me they don't want or need me around #(this is abt my irls btw) #and i know that I'm wrong but I can't stop feeling like that ever #and it's bad when I'm feeling upset/worrying about something and they don't respond/can't give me an answer #but it might just be worse when im talking about something i love to them and they just ignore it #like yeah im sorry for rambling for two hours about how much i love my favorite character and his flaws and character development but like #that really fucking hurts when i check back to see if anyone saw and they did and didn't say anything and then they just move on to smthelse #like ofc ppl HAVE to care when you're going ooo i hate myself so bad ooo you wanna help me sooo baddd bc guilt/fear #but it rlly shows that they don't care when they don't want to touch your spams about things you love/care when you're in a good mood #like ig i just am overwhelming them w Something they don't even like so it's understandable but it still just hurts that I don't have #that place/gc to that I'm fully comfortable with rambling to like that #and esp since i used to try and at least pretend to be interested in their stuff when they used to do shit like that #but i can't do that anymore (I'm just too bitter) but i feel so wrong and bad n petty for being like that #eugghh what was i even talking abt???? sjskssjs this got way off topic i did not intend to vent in da tags #it's just another rough day basically <3 #lundi rambling

[rviden]

hello <3 may i request headcanons with xiao, scaramouche, dainslief, kazuha and albedo with a female s/o that had a really bad day/rough week. (ig in a similar situation as traveler and she misses her sibling terribly so she ends up breaking down or sobbing in front of them. what do they do to comfort her or how affectionate would they be?

— COMFORTING THEIR OVERWHELMED S/O

#includes — scaramouche, kazuha, xiao, albedo

#warnings — n/a

#pronouns — no pronouns mentioned

#note — i don't actually write for dainsleif anymore unfortunately - i don't know enough about his character :(

#SCARAMOUCHE

now he's not the best with the whole feelings and comforting thing, but the minute you start to feel the overwhelming sadness or just stress in general, he knows

being super perceptive of your feelings is something that scaramouche is great at, so you can bet that before your knee's even remotely give out, scara is at your side

while he doesn't comfort you with kind words or reassurances, his hands are wiping away the tears falling from your eyes, his body is close to yours, and he's running his thumbs along your cheek bones — he holds you and shows that he's there through words

scaramouche 100% asks "are you done?" when you stop crying — both in attempt to make you laugh, and also in attempt to just get you to speak — he's not good with mushy feelings, give him a break!

#KAZUHA

puts down anything and everything in an instant so he can be at your side to provide you anything you need — kazuha is also a very preceptive lover, so nothing goes unnoticed by him

kazuha would pull you to a quieter place (ect. your bedroom, the dining room) just so there would be no other distractions around the two of you

now kazuha is both physical and verbal when he comforts your distressed figure — his body if shuffled close to yours as he holds you into his chest, and he's whispering light encouragements and professions of love

kazuha just wants to see you smile or at least calm down, seeing you in such a state of distress worries him to the core, so he'll do anything in his power to help you (somewhat people pleaser kazuha)

#XIAO

another boy who isn't the best with strong emotions — he understands what you're going through, the overwhelming feelings that you're going through, so the most he can do is just be there

xiao would sit silently at your side, not being overbearing in touches as to not cause you any more stress then you're already going through — his shoulder just brushing against yours as if he was trying to say "i'm here for you"

once your heart finally calms down, and your breathing becomes even, xiao offers you whatever he can think of — a bowl of your favourite food, a certain comfort item, or even just a hug, whatever it is that you want, he'll get you

he's patient yet awkward — xiao will wait an eternity for you in silence if that's what you need most

#ALBEDO

physical over verbal comforts

albedo is on the quieter side of the scale, so he puts his words into his actions — the minute you walk into the house, tear stains on your cheeks and puffy eyes, albedo is walking over and pulling you towards the couch

he'll sit with you and listen to you rant about what in your day/week had gone wrong, never once interrupting you and giving you all the time in the world to let it all out

when albedo senses that you're starting to come down from the stress and becoming more exhausted then anything, he'll pull your head into his lap and just sit with you — his fingers nimbly massaging your scalp as a way to help you relax

albedo would sit quietly for you to fall asleep, and once you do, he'll be right behind you — falling asleep with the blanket thrown over the two of you

taglist — open

@bluexiao // @kxmorri // @seppyco // @immaswallowurkids // @cynettic // @lasignorasearring

if your name is crossed out, it means i couldn't tag a blog with that name!

#🖇 — scaramouche #🖇 — kazuh #🖇 — xiao #🖇 — albedo #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact imagine #genshin x reader #genshin imagine #scaramouche x reader #scaramouche imagine #kazuha x reader #kazuha imagine #xiao x reader #xiao imagine #albedo x reader #albedo imagine