#idk if I covered everything I should have feel free to ask me more stuff 'd be happy to answer | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

shadowsong26x · 1 year

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Yes, it’s been a while, yes, I’m aware that it’s no longer 2022, but here we are, back again with the Great BSG Rewatch of 2022!

Obligatory plug for Galactica Big Bang here, since that’s a thing now XD Signups will open July 1, I’ll be posting more about it here and on the event tumblr as we get closer to that. We also have a Discord!

Anyway, that shameless self-promotion aside, we’re picking up with Season 3! This is actually my favorite season overall--despite the fact that it doesn’t include my very favorite episode(/two-parter) and does include my least favorite episode (which we’ll get to in the back half of the season) along with a couple other storylines that irk me. It feels just...IDK, even though this is the real start of the ‘writing by the seat of our pants’ problems that are a Thing in the second half of this series, and it’s not actually all that cohesive, as a season it feels weirdly cohesive? Like, thematically, and so on. And anyway I just like it.

I am splitting this up into halves, like I did with season 2, and there aren’t any Extras in this round (I should probably track down the Resistance webisodes; I know I have the Face of the Enemy stuff, but not those). So this covers everything from Occupation through The Passage.

My notes on the miniseries and Season 1 can be found here; and my notes on the first half of S2 (plus Resurrection Ship and Razor) can be found here. My notes on the rest of S2 (plus The Plan) can be found here.

As before, my notes contain spoilers because I have seen the full series before. I’ve copied over a lot of quotes I like, some with commentary, some with just Flailing. Also some plot/construction notes, and some notes to myself about The Other Battlestar (which I swear I am actually working on; although it needs a better title lol) and a couple other self-indulgent AUs/potential fic projects, which I have deleted. There might be a few I missed, though.

Also, warnings. Very Very important content warnings: genocide, suicide, intimate partner violence, torture, and sexual assault, as well as a lot of other Violence. And, because we are living in a post-COVID world, plague/pandemic stuff. The torture warnings are particularly heavy for both halves of season 3. Also, there’s quite a bit of dubcon in this first half. And a lot of fatphobia/diet culture BS. Feel free to send me an ask if you want more details.

That should cover it, so let’s get down to business to defeat the Huns wait wrong fandom. MOVING ON.

Occupation:

And the opening bit has changed! At least adding that bit with Caprica waking up and her and Boomer(?) and A Random Five coming to accept the surrender.

Kara gets the previously-on!

…which then dives Right into Creepy!Leoben because Of Course, that whole Thing.

YAY MY 2000-YEAR-OLD DYSFUNCTIONAL ROBOT DRUNKS IN LOVE

I’m sorry I can’t take the moustache seriously XD

Oh that closeup on Ellen’s ring during the flashes of her and Cavil, and cut together with building a bomb and lighting candles in a temple and. I love this arc A Whole Lot guys, there will probably be not much intelligent Commentary, mostly just Flailing.

I do like the way this bit with Ellen is shot, without showing Cavil’s face for a very long time, to let you think it’s Tigh thinking about that while he’s in lockup.

Huh, Bill still wears his wedding ring, I don’t think I’d picked up on that before.

Chief’s post-timeskip facial hair is pretty great.

Aaaaaaand now we’re up to the Creepy Dollhouse.

Lol Cavil just casually putting on his sunglasses.

Aaaaand now we can see she was screwing Cavil. Or hear, at least, the face is still unclear, but given what she says and her attitude when she climbs off…

Yay, bombs!

And this just gets Creepier and Creepier the more we learn about Cavil and the Final Five.

Lol “we gotta get you processed. Bureaucracy, you know.” Cavil just enjoys frakking with him.

Awwwww, the way they Cling to each other when he gets out.

YOU ARE SO CREEPY LEOBEN

Niiiiiice they weren’t even sharp and went all the way through his neck.

Wonder how many times she’s done this. Given how casually he says “I’ll see you soon” probably Many.

And this music as she picks up the knife and finishes her dinner with her hand still bloody and she’s very Mannerly about that part and I love it.

Ooooh, and different words!!! And no survivor count.

BABY! Oh, poor Nicky, did you get screwed over by the narrative.

134 days into the occupation.

Mars day.

Lol Cavil’s air quotes on ‘god’

D’Anna is also only halfway paying attention; hard to tell how much attention Baltar is paying until they suggest executing him. XD

And Caprica’s like “nope” “just because he’s your favorite toy.”

Oooh, and she specifically looks to D’Anna on ‘anyone who wants to challenge that [he’s with me].’ I guess they were setting that up already.

Still wish we knew whether this D’Anna was Fleet!D’Anna or Downloaded!D’Anna or both (probably not both But)

YAY MY BEST BELOVED MOST IRONICALLY NAMED MAN IN THE UNIVERSE FELIX GAETA. AND THE PUPPY!!!!!

Puppy is very very important.

Baby!!!

Nice, dug-out cellar safehouses, that’s what I thought I remembered.

Ah, the Irony XD

So, Gaeta’s been passing stuff for weeks, which seems to have started after Tigh was arrested. I wonder if he tried other things before he worked out this system, or if it just took him a couple months to figure Anything out about making contact?

And Tigh and Cavil are using very similar “send a message” rhetoric, that’s interesting.

And yeah, can’t blame Sam for taking the ‘they’re not coming for us’ attitude. And this argument between him and Saul is just. Amazing, I love it.

And Tigh’s face with “any word on Kara” I love their relationship so much.

“Hi, honey, I’m home.”

Five times, apparently!

Lol the casual way he steps over his own dead body.

And she doesn’t kill him that time, interesting.

“I’m a patient man.” “You’re not a man.” “I’m willing to wait. You just need more time.” SO FUCKING CREEPY.

“To know the face of God is to know madness.” I feel like that’s come up before and every time I hear it it’s followed up with “To love another person is to see the face of God” in my head. IDK if I’m going anywhere with that but…there it is.

“Either way you’ll be spending the night with me” FUCK. “I do love you, Kara Thrace.” Ffffffuck.

Oh man how quiet the flight deck is.

YAY KAT

THIS FUCKING SUBPLOT I HATE IT SO FUCKING MUCH.

Hi Hoshi!

Oh shit collision.

Dee is so pretty. And deserves so much better.

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate.

“You’re weak, soft. Mentally and physically.” I HATE THIS SUBPLOT. I REALLY HATE IT.

Not Lee and Bill fighting, that’s whatever. The Fat!Lee subplot, it is every kind of. Fuck it. Just fuck it. I hate it so much I can’t even words.

Playing pyramid while planning a suicide bombing yay.

“Not the first time we’ve sent a soldier on a one-way mission.”

“Some things you don’t do, even in war.” “Maybe you’ll feel different when it’s you sitting in detention.”

And Bill and Athena, yay!!! I still like my headcanon for why her hair is the same exact length as her sisters here XD

“I don’t do guilt,” he lied, like a liar.

“I sat here consumed with rage at all the things that had happened to me. And at some point I realized it was just guilt.” And she does call her betrayal what it is. And talks about choosing to forgive herself and move forward.

This is interesting, I’d kind of like to watch this scene back to back with that one bit with Dee during the Kobol arc.

Dee is so irritated right now and I kind of want to fast forward past this entire scene except I’m Committed to a full rewatch and if I didn’t fast forward through some of the earlier bits like in Six Degrees or Captain’s Hand I’m not gonna skip this. Also Dee’s face is pretty.

“You lost your war. And you’re a soldier who needs a war.” Interesting.

…and that was slightly Awkward exposition “that’s one of the reasons I married you.”

If they had Felix on the ground with them they’d probably have more luck with the comms.

And yep, there is a Raptor because of course there is.

YAY CONTACT!

Her face when they make contact!!!!

Have hope. We’re coming for you.

<33333333333

Tory is also Very Pretty.

I am…actually not surprised that there are 200 people. There were always going to be the Majority of people, who keep their heads down and just try to survive, low-level cooperation as necessary, and then the people on the outer extremes of either Resistance or Collaboration. And there are always going to be enough people on that Collaboration fringe. And they’ll have a lot of reasons for it, it’ll vary from person to person, but…it’ll always happen.

Ohhhhhh this prayer. Even without watching Resistance and getting to know this guy it’s. It’s a Lot.

And Baltar decides at the last minute not to go to the ceremony.

Felix’s hair is so Floofy I love it.

As he BOLTS to the dead drop location.

Tigh makes a very good tactical point. But does allow for the strike to be aborted if Baltar isn’t going to be there but Chief doesn’t get the message in time and…yeah.

He checks the bowl a Minute too early if he’d been just a Minute later…

“They call this a suicide vest, but I think that really underplays the homicide involved.”

OH THAT SHOT WITH THE CRACKED MIRROR

Don’t look suspicious don’t look suspicious

Centurion jumpscare! But then it turns away and lets him pass.

BOOM

Precipice:

Bill gets the previously on, I think!

Subtitles that was not Starbuck

Yessssss prison conversation!!!!! I love the scenes with the two of them talking when one of them’s in prison. They’re just. Some of the best.

(Yeah, no real comments I just. I just love scenes like this with Laura and Gaius.)

“Their only crime was putting on a uniform.” I think it’s this episode or maybe it’s the next one where Bill has a really great line about the importance of symbols/uniforms and just. PARALLELS I LOVE IT.

Well that’s almost certainly not Philosopher!Cavil but he did steal his hat!

“Which side are we on? We’re on the side of the demons, Chief. We’re evil men in the gardens of paradise, sent by the forces of death to spend devastation and destruction wherever we go. I’m surprised you didn’t know that.” I LOVE THAT LINE SO MUCH.

I also love how, whatever other shortages there might be, they Never run out of cigarettes XD

1150 armed effectives, nice to have numbers!

“Eventually, your people will see you as heroes.” “Not tonight."

Oh right Cally got taken I forgot that.

Poor Nicky. Poor poor Nicky.

Oh man especially after “one of these days you’re just not going to come home” she said in the last episode and oh maaaaaaan.

I do like the Bright Colored Coats in that shot of the marketplace.

Yeah, destroying the launch keys would cause more problems than it solved.

And Lee’s not wrong about the weapons drop.

“Detention is run by a separate ministry.” “How do you do it? How do you help them day after day? How do you look yourself in the mirror?" And Gaeta just. Trying to keep his cover. But he promises to do what he can to find out. “Why don’t you try and do something?” He is. But he cannot say it. Especially not where they might be overheard.

And Jammer is having Emotions.

“I bet they’re in over their heads. At first I bet they thought they were doing something good at first. Get the Cylons off the streets.” “Then they were frakking idiots. What did they expect? …you know any names?” “…no.”

“One day when this is all over, guys like Gaeta are gonna get strung up. And guys like you and me are gonna be there tying the knots.” Knowing how Collaborators actually goes, and how Chief handles things in there…MAN.

AND THE CREEPY THING WITH THE TODDLER LEOBEN YOU’RE A CREEPER JUST STOP.

“I remember I blew the crap out of that place.” “It wasn’t a total loss. We were able to salvage certain things. Like your ovary.” CREEP. ER.

She is a very cute little girl, though.

“What’s that?” Lol.

Ohh, that little half-smile as he carries her down the stairs.

YAY COMMISSIONING ATHENA TO SEND HER AS A LIAISON!!!

Okay, 2000 civilians with the battlestars yay numbers.

Oh and that reference to the Centurions being carefully restrained.

“If we go back to New Caprica now, and we lose, then humanity just stops. And admiral stars don’t give you the right to make that gamble.”

And that’s why Bill splits Lee and Pegasus off as a failsafe. “I know why we left those people behind. And I know it was their choice to be down there. And I realize the survival of the human race outweighs everything else. But this time, I can’t live with it.” Yesssssss

And they hug. But they don’t get their music this time.

Leoben is still fucking creepy talking about their fake baby’s future.

No, Starbuck’s not gonna let the little girl starve but. Man.

And this conversation about suicide bombings I love it. I love Laura and I love Saul and just. Love all of this.

Yeah, Saul, you deserved that. And Sam’s face in the background like “oooooh shit”

“Sometimes I think that you’ve got ice water in those veins and other times I think you’re just a naïve little schoolteacher. I’ve sent men on suicide missions in two wars now. And let me tell you something. It don’t make a godsdamned bit of difference if they whether they’re riding in a viper or walking out onto a parade ground. In the end, they’re just as dead. So take your piety and your moralizing and your high-minded principles and stick ‘em someplace safe until we’re off this rock and you’re sitting in your nice cushy chair on Colonial One again. I’ve got a war to fight.”

Tigh has the BEST LINE in this arc.

And Boomer is like “this is fucked up” and Caprica’s like “yes it is but how else to we respond to suicide bombings”

And Boomer is having Emotions!

(Lol Kacey’s mom is going to get one foulmouthed toddler back XD)

And Boomer goes to see Cally! Who was the cause of her (first?) death!

“I want you and Galen to know that I’m happy for you, especially since you started a family. Something he and I talked about before.” “Can you get me out of here?” “I don’t know. I have nothing to do with internal security—” “Then frak off you stupid frakked up toaster. How many times do I have to shoot you anyway? If you can’t help me, then just go away and leave us alone!”

EMOTIONS

Oh man this scene.

Power substation is crippled, two weeks to repair.

Just this pan around the circle of Cylons.

Caprica’s face oh man.

And he looks to her for help and she tries to defend him and.

“The first act of Cylon on Cylon violence” lol no.

“Everything we do requires your signature.”

“They’re covering their existential asses.” LOL.

“Then we’ll find another President.”

So this is…probably the first time Caprica has been killed in front of him to make a point But.

And the other Sixes’ faces.

“She’ll be back.” “But if he pulls that trigger now you won’t.”

Oh man and the change of lighting when we switch to Head!Six.

Interesting implication that she hasn’t been around and turns up after Caprica gets shot and then. And then he looks down and he’s already signed, and they’re just. Lined up staring at him. And that one Five is a little out of breath.

And we get a closeup on Boomer’s face and. Oh man.

YAY SHARON AGATHON

Helo is so haaaaaaappy

Aww, their little smiles as they walk away holding hands.

“Looks good on you. Belongs on you.” Awwwwwwwwwwwwww.

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

“Can I ask you a question? How do you know? How do you know that you can trust me?” “I don’t. That’s what trust is. Good hunting, Lieutenant.”

Oh man Ellen’s faaaaaaace. And then Cavil asks about Saul and she freezes. And he’s asking for intel about the insurgency.

“We know he’s their leader. Why do you think we let him out of detention?” “I thought it was because of the twist.” “Well, yes, that too, for sure.”

“I want a specific place and a specific time of a very high-level meeting of the insurgency. If I don’t get it, we’ll pick up Saul again. And this time, he’ll lose more than an eye.”

And Saul’s reaction to hearing about Athena’s commission.

And Sam has the map for the meet! And hides it away when there’s a knock but pulls it back out when he sees it’s Ellen and oh man.

Yep, Sam knows how this part of things works, that’s why he’s on this council with the military guys.

And she takes the map when he’s planning to burn it and. Oh man. Her Face.

“Tell me you didn’t sign it, Gaius.”

“Have you even looked at the names?” “I’VE SEEN THEM. I’ve seen them, all right? There was nothing I could do.”

“No one enjoys the thought of mortal death, Boomer. But she tried to murder you. Maybe it’s God’s justice.”

AND THEN THERE’S THIS ASSHOLE (AFFECTIONATE)

And Zarek’s been in detention the whole time because he refused to collaborate.

Aww, Sam and Athena hug!!!

“Been a long time.” “Funny, I feel like I see you every day.” And her little half-smile.

And Gaeta is trying to find Cally in one of the trucks so he can help her.

Oh man and Kara taking Leoben’s hand there because. Oh shit.

“Last year. You tried to steal the election, didn’t you?” “Yes, I did.” “I wish you’d gone through with it.” “Me, too.” And on the one hand, when the Cylons turned up there was absolutely no choice but surrender (it’s everything he did After that that’s the problem). On the other hand, if she’d won, they never would’ve settled. So no one would’ve been in that position.

…but would something similar have played out on a less shitty planet if the Cylons caught up to them there? Interesting thought experiment.

And Jammer pulls Cally out of line and she obviously thinks he’s going to do Horrible Things to her which. Yeah.

Especially when he pulls out the knife. But then he cuts the tie and tells her to run and not look back.

And now all the police flee and Cavil just sidesteps as the Centurions show up. And Tom pulls Laura back and Cally is fleeing and she hears the shots and.

I love this arc a whole lot.

Exodus 1:

Chief gets the previously-on I think.

Maya! She’s like the only Wholesome named character in the entire canon. XD

Oh that shot of the empty socket.

“I want you to know that I would do anything for you.” And she was a split second from confessing and then Chief interrupts.

And he’s shaved!

And Saul cuts through Chief’s panic. “Take four men and get there ahead of the trucks. Chief! Pull it together. You won’t do her any good if you get caught too. Besides, the last thing your son wants is me and Ellen for parents.” There are so many levels of With Context there I can’t even XD

And Chief is still flailing while he looks for the coordinate list I love him. This relationship is very fucked up but I love him.

Yay Cottle’s in this episode!!!!

And Athena had her marines positioned for cover because she is Smart and so are they.

Chief’s learned a lot about ground ops since Kobol. So has Seelix.

“Where there are skinjobs, there are bulletheads. Break out the RPG.”

…oh man, that’s a thought. Chief, Cally, and Seelix were all on Kobol together (with Baltar). And now the three of them are here at that execution site. Does it mean anything? Probably not! But it’s a Thought!

Oh man, Chief holding Cally down under cover. And Jammer took his mask off.

Aaaaaand they find the map on Cavil.

OH RIGHT I KNOW THAT GUY. I forgot he was introduced this early but he’s in the Circle, isn’t he?

“They were waiting for us. Right where we thought.” Marine is like “yep I know my business thank you for listening” and then Sam gets the map back aaaaaand realizes Ellen sold them out and. Oh boy.

“Been a while since I had a woman throw me to the ground. Not quite as much fun as I remember.” LOL.

And Seelix makes sure the gun is out of range so Cavil will die slow.

And now Whichever D’Anna This Is is having Visions! I do love the really cool greyed-out lighting effects for this whole thing. And she sees the bodies, and hears Hera crying and sees herself picking the baby up.

“It doesn’t matter to me, really.” “You can stop that right now. My ego’s not so fragile as all of that.” Lol I forgot that bit was in there. “These things happen. Or they don’t happen.”

Okay Doral is not Entirely wrong about the importance of sanitation (and also that ‘lack of toilet paper’ comment hits a little different post-COVID lol)

“Four months of this, Gaius. Four months of watching you slip further and further down into this well of self-hatred and loathing. Do you know what I’ve given up for you? Do you?” “Do you know, what with the occupation and everything. I really can’t say I’ve given it that much thought recently.”

And this is why I headcanon that they actually don’t talk that much during this period. Not about anything serious or real. Except when he lashes out like this. They don’t talk about what they did. What they’re doing. It came up in a fic I wrote ages ago (which probably should’ve been two fics, it was two conversations) but like…yeah.

And then he says “Don’t go. …please.” And she watches him drink, and she does come back. Because they do love each other, even if there are these hollow places between them, these things they can’t say. (I do ship them very much; I do love their ending together; and I have…many more things to say about this period in their relationship but that is not the purpose of these notes lol.)

And that is actually Good Parenting, to apologize to the little girl and say it was because “I was upset with myself, not with you. Grown-ups do stupid things sometimes.” I love Kara a whole lot.

And Kacey grabbing her finger as she turns to leave and FEELINGS.

And Leoben is watching them.

D’Anna going through the city, seeing little flashes from her vision/nightmare…

[yeah there are reasons she’s another one I headcanon as force-sensitive for crossover purposes darth lawless is a cylon]

“Don’t be afraid, I know who you are, what you are. Poor thing. You must be terrified.”

“Zeus sees all. Sees you, Number Three. Sees your pain, your destiny. All the gods weep for you.” Oooooooooooh.

“There’s no Zeus. No other god but God.” “You don’t believe that anymore. You don’t know what you believe, and that is why you’re here.” “Not true. I don’t even know why I’m here. Stupidest thing I ever did.”

I’m really loving this scene more than I remembered omg.

“I have a message for you, from the one you worship. He speaks through me to you, just as he does in your dreams. The message is: the fruit born of two peoples is alive. A child named after the wife and sister of the all-knowing Zeus. Hera lives.” “That’s not true. The child is dead.” “You will hold her in your arms, and you’ll know for the first time what it is to feel true love. But you’ll lose everything you’ve done here.” And D’Anna is crying. “…wish I had some chocolate caramels.”

Okay but I love this oracle I want twelve.

Aww, Dee and Helo are being cute. “Will you quite looking at me like that?” “Like what?” “Like we’re never gonna see each other again. We will.” “Take care of the Admiral?” “Take care of his son.”

And this goodbye/separation ceremony I love it so much.

Racetrack reads from the Scrolls, I think! I can’t always recognize her out of her helmet, I’ll admit…

“Always together.” And then the hugs. My heart.

AND A FISTBUMP

“If I’m not back in 18 hours, find Earth.” “Yeah, right.” “I’ll see you at the rendezvous point.” “18 hours. Try not to be late.” “I’m getting old, I’m a little slow. But I’ll be there.” AND NOW WE GET THE MUSIC AND I DON’T LIKE LEE AND. EVERY. GODDAMN. TIME.

“Don’t make me cry on my own hangar deck.” FUCK YOU I’M CRYING YOU CRY WITH ME.

PUPPY!

“You don’t care who I am, do you? All God’s creatures in your eyes.”

YAY COTTLE! “Can’t sleep?” “Bad dreams.” “Didn’t know you people had dreams.” “Sure. Everybody dreams, Doc. That human or cylon blood?” “Cylon. One of the Fives got pretty shot up today by the insurgents. But he’s gonna make it.” “You could’ve let him suffer.” “That’s not what I do.” YES I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.

And now D’Anna (D’anna? Which is correct lol) turns the conversation to Hera and Cottle is like “…ah yes. That mess. Yay.”

“When that child died on Galactica, why did you cremate the body? The first cylon-human hybrid, and you threw it into the incinerator?” “It wasn’t my decision. It was the President’s call. I was just following orders.” “…that’s a very funny thing. ‘Cause this stuff all looks the same.”

…I don’t think this is the same dog that Lampkin later gets, I think he gets a yellow lab but I might be misremembering. The POINT is there are possibly TWO ENTIRE PUPPIES in the fleet.

“They left me in the hot sun with a bullet in my guts.” “What a noble race you are.” Shut up, Doral.

“Skin’s a lot tougher than you think.” Yikes. “Now that’s three for me. Three downloads. The first I just got a headache, but I could handle it. Now it’s worse and worse. This time it was like a white-hot poker through my skull. It’s not worth it. None of this is worth it.”

“He’s right, you know,” Gaius says quietly. While crying. …oooooooh. “It’s not worth it. Which is what I believe I’ve been telling you all along.” “Caprica, can you please control him?” “Why don’t you just shoot me, if that’ll remedy the situation?”

Watching Boomer in this scene, as she listens to Cavil’s story and is having Emotions and…knowing where that relationship is going (assuming this is Primary Cavil which. It’s hard to tell, but one can assume if there’s only one One in the scene it’s Probably him unless otherwise specified? Especially for Important Shit like overseeing the mass execution and these meetings.) and also her whole story arc in general. Man.

Caprica’s more ‘I don’t want to hear this but I’ll listen because I am the main reason we’re here.’

And the little glare she shoots Doral when he tells her to control Gaius.

Also the way D’anna was watching Gaius talk.

Oh, and while he was saying ‘why don’t you just shoot me’ Caprica apparently turned away, because she spins back around when Doral suggests cracking down harder.

“Consensus used to be so easy. Now look what they’ve done to us.” Oh, it’s not just this, though it definitely accelerated the fissures here. But.

“Worst comes to worst, we can always just nuke the city and be done with it.”

Aww, Athena refusing to give up her dogtags.

“Thanks for the concern. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.”

And Ellen gets dragged in and is Shocked to see Athena and. Oh man. Oh man oh man oh man That Scene is coming up and. GDI I’ve already cried once this episode.

“Where is my husband I want to speak to my husband!”

And Sam asks Athena to keep an eye out for Starbuck “I don’t know if she’s alive or dead, but it’s been four months.” “I’ll do what I can.”

“We’ll keep her on the move, along with other high-value targets. She’ll never stay in one place longer than two or three days.” I wonder who the other high-value targets are?

And Sam doesn’t know why Maya is so valuable, but he trusts Roslin and he will keep her safe. “How far do you want me to go? If it looks like the Cylons are gonna capture them…” “No. Don’t let it get to that point. That’s all.” He does asks what’s so important, and gets the “she may very well be the shape of things to come. That’s either a blessing or a curse” answer, which is vague, but enough for him to figure it out, maybe???? But he was clearly going to do it regardless of the answer, which is I think why Roslin actually let him in on the secret? That was a FASCINATING little moment omg gotta watch it again.

OH MAN ESPECIALLY SINCE THIS FLASHBACK COMES IMMEDIATELY AFTER HIS CONVERSATION WITH ATHENA AND HE KNOWS BUT. BUT BUT BUT OH MY FUCKING GOD.

…I wonder what the original purpose of this dug-out room where they’re having this conversation was. Maybe they just had the basement-type storage under several of the tents? They probably couldn’t’ve started digging them after the occupation, it would’ve drawn too much attention…

His FACE as he puts the pieces together and OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD I NEVER NOTICED THAT BEFORE BUT HE KNEW SAM KNEW AND HE’S ONE OF THE PEOPLE WHO’S KNOWN/WORKED WITH ATHENA THE LONGEST IN SOME WAYS SO HIS CHOICE NOT TO TELL HER IS OH MY GOD OH MY GOD THIS IS BREAKING ME HOW DID I NOT NOTICE THIS SHIT BEFORE OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD.

…ahem. I’m okay. Um.

holy shit though omgomgomg

…right, back to D’anna.

She’s wandering through the city, focusing on babies…but that one’s too young to be Hera.

And now the Resistance is talking weapons.

“No Pegasus, just Galactica.” “Why?” “Don’t know, sir. Way beyond my paygrade.”

Zarek asks if they’ve rehearsed. …he’s keeping to his carefully-constructed persona here, but I imagine that if he wasn’t satisfied with what Chief et al are telling him…if anyone knows how to sow chaos, it’s him. [if I write for GBB along with running it, one of my possible ideas (since most of my Ideas are way too long lol) is to do something Zarek-focused; possibly surrounding his original arrest…]

((and there’s this sam knew sam knew sam knew in the back of my brain that I’m not gonna stop thinking for a while lol it’s like https://64.media.tumblr.com/0ac9d8e9014935480bcfb5b3e643c385/f3631f541e57a655-5c/s1280x1920/7280e89354e384b744b17c5be078c1c177d243f3.jpg ))

And Mathias is pointing out that “when there’s shooting and chaos and panic it’ll be different” and Roslin doesn’t exactly tell her she’s wrong but…like there’s nothing else we can do about it, we have to trust we’ve prepared enough and hope for the best at this point.

“I trust you because I trust him.”

And then Ellen gets brought in.

Athena walking through the town, getting Looks and a bottle thrown at her and she just. Keeps moving.

And they confront Saul and Ellen with the map and.

“He said…he said he’d kill you.” “Who said it?” “One of the Brother Cavils. I did it for you, Saul. It was all for you. I had to. I didn’t have any choice. Don’t you see that?” and their FACES oh my god my beloved dumpster fire 2000-year-old robot drunks in love I can’t take it.

And Athena just puts her hand into the datastream, no unsettling self-injury this time Thank Fuck.

Oh, nice, voice-activated storage!!!

And D’anna (or some Three) interrupts. “…my God, it’s you.” Athena pulls a gun. “You’re betraying your own people. For what?” “I’m a Colonial Officer.” “You’re not one of them.” “I gave them my word.” “That’s not what counts. It’s who you give it to.” “I’m gonna have to shoot you now.” “Hera lives.” Oh, okay, it is D’Anna. “…what?” “Your daughter Hera is alive. Your new friends tell you that?” and Athena’s face and her flashbacks and oh maaaaaan.

“They faked her death and hid her from you.” “You would say anything—” “I had dreams. I had strange dreams that made me question my faith. Made me question God. And in the dreams, there was a human oracle, so I went to see Dodona Selloi.” “I’m not going to kill you, but I’m going to wound you so you can’t warn the others.” “The oracle said that the fruit born of two peoples is still alive. That Hera lives and I would hold her in my arms and I will know true love. Put down the gun, and when I find her, you can hold her, too.” And Athena kneecaps her. “Adama wouldn’t lie to me.” “You’re wrong. YOU’RE WRONG!”

Just. Athena’s face during that whole thing.

Enough fuel to make at least one jump! And she congratulates him on his son! “What’s his name?” “Nicolas, after Cally’s grandfather.” “You remember when you helped Chief spread Hera’s ashes? You actually saw the ashes?” “Yeah, of course. Why?” “Nothing. …just make sure Cally never lets her kid out of her sight.”

EMOTIONS.

And Helo is just bursting with pride when he reports that his wife successfully got the launch keys.

And Kat is fidgeting in the rec room and Racetrack is pacing and picks up the phone when it buzzes and IT’S ON!

“You’ve heard the news. You know the mission. You should also know that there’s only way this mission ends. And that’s with the successful rescue of our people off of New Caprica. Look around you. Take a good look at the men and women that stand next to you. Remember their faces. For one day you will tell your children and your grandchildren that you served with such men and women as the universe has never seen, and together you accomplished a feat that will be told and retold down through the ages and find immortality as only the gods once knew. I’m proud to serve with you. Good hunting.” YES YES YES YES YES.

…apparently Captain Kelly was in that episode??? I always miss him, lol…

Exodus 2:

Previously on from Bill!

“I’m having trouble accepting this.” “I know but we have to push forward. Keep the fleet together. Find Earth.”

“I haven’t given up hope.” “Yes, you have. I saw the look on your face when you got back from Galactica. Like you were never going to see him again.” “Am I that easy to read?” “Just to me.”

“No matter what the cost. No matter who we leave behind.” “You can do this. You can get us there. You are the commander of this fleet, and you will guide us to safety.”

(I don’t have a lot of Thoughts on this scene because I generally don’t have a lot of thoughts on Lee, but I do get flashes of why he and Dee love each other, even if she was his second choice.)

Oh no oh no oh no.

Sam pushing at Tigh with all the reasons and he’s like “I get it, all right?” “You know what has to be done here. If you don’t want to do it, I understand. But believe me, Colonel, someone is gonna do this. Now it would be better for her sake if it was you.”

His FACE oh my god oh my god oh no my heart.

(look I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; Tigh grows on me more and more with each rewatch and so this is gonna kill me I will be deceased he is now one of my favorites and he and Ellen are just. Oh my god.)

“I had to do it, Saul. I had to. It was all for you. And I want you to know that I would’ve done anything to save you.” “I know. I know. It’s all right. It’s going to be all right.” “No, you don’t understand. I got you out of detention, Saul. It was me. I got you out. I went to see them, the Cylons. Finally got to the one (One?) in charge. And I got him to notice me the way men notice me. I slept with him. And I felt like puking every time he put his filthy hands on me. But I smiled and I faked it to save you, Saul. But you listen to me. I’d do it again. Frak anybody. Do anything. Even gave ‘em the map. I didn’t want anybody to be killed.” And he holds her and she’s crying and. And his face. And. And then he gives her the poisoned cup, and she nods a little. “I could use the drink.” And the LOOK they share. And. Kate Vernon has said she knew and she’s DEFINITELY playing it that way and oh my god his face and how calm she is and. “You’ve always been there for me when I needed you. Oh, I’m exhausted. I feel like I could just curl up here. Should’ve listened to you, Saul. Should’ve stayed on Galactica.” “Don’t worry about any of that now. You just…you just go to sleep.” “I’m sleepy…”

BAWL. ING.

I don’t even care that that was Really Fast for an orally-consumed poison to work I just.

“I love you, Ellen. Do you hear me?”

((this will come up again on the algae planet arc but…like…we have these instances of someone murdering their spouse, and that’s usually a certain Thing, especially when it’s a man murdering his wife, as both cases are, especially in a show with this much intimate partner violence, and yet. AND YET. Both murders are just. EMOTIONS. FEELINGS. BAWLING. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.))

And the way he cries over her body and just. That last line of his. “I love you, Ellen. Do you hear me?”

FUCK FUCK FUCK.

Gaeta is just sketching; Baltar is drunk and rambling. “And where are we now? And more to the point, where’s Laura Roslin? Where’s Tom Zarek? At large. Whereabouts unknown. Free, at any rate. Probably with Colonel Tigh. Solidifying the insurgency’s hold on the public’s imagination.” “What would you have us do, Gaius?” D’Anna asks. “Leave. Pack up your Centurions, and go. Please. Go.”

And D’anna’s like “would you really leave us alone if we did that? Or would you raise your children to continue the war? Would you tell them to tell that story to their children, and their children’s children, so that one day they could go out among the stars and hunt the Cylons once more?” “Blood for blood. It has to stop one day.”

OH SHIT. OH SHIT, I THINK HE SAYS THE SAME THING WHEN HE’S TALKING CAVIL DOWN IN DAYBREAK. “Blood for blood. It has to stop one day.”

And ALL OF THE THINGS are exploding!

((Man, the Fours generally get…not a lot to do. I think one Four has had one line in this entire arc.))

Tory coordinating the evacuation!

OF COURSE THERE ARE WEAPONS HIDDEN UNDERNEATH THE PYRAMID COURT

Sam’s running the attack on the detention center.

And the maneuver from the beginning of this arc! Only now it’s For Real. And they do pull it off yay!

And there’s chaos in the office and Caprica goes over to Gaius who is just. Slumped over in the corner. “For nothing. All for nothing.” “We’ll start over, Gaius. A new city to rise from the ashes.” “It’ll be buried. Buried like the cities of old. Consumed by the wrath of God.”

And Boomer (probably) reports that the drone thing worked and we have two battlestars in orbit! “Adama’s back.”

And Leoben hits Starbuck when she tries to overpower him/kill him again to get out the door.

“You’re coming, right?” “My ship’s up there.” “You sure have a sense of the dramatic.” LOVE IT.

“Hey, you, you were on Galactica right?” “I didn’t do anything!” LOL But also poor Jammer. ((also the Parallel to when Helo singled out Baltar in the miniseries i love it))

“All hands, brace for turbulence.”

A second line for Simon! “Where’s Galactica?”

YES YES YES YES YES YES YES DROP THE BUCKET!!!!

FIRE!!!!!!

And Chief’s FACE while he watches this happen torn between “thank fuck” and his mechanic brain SCREAMING

“Well, this oughta be different” LOL HOTDOG

Oh, there’s Kelly.

And the Backlash when Galactica jumps away!!!

And they have Explosives for the prison!

Sam finds Kara yay!

And he’s so relieved she’s breathing and he kisses her “I’m gonna get you out of here” and oh no Kacey

There are too many baseships, they can’t hold off four, they were hoping to hold them off long enough for the civilians to escape and I mean I know how this ends I’ve seen it before but just. Bill’s voice when he says “we can’t hold off four” omg

Bill is running cords and there’s a medic (I don’t think Ishay?) there. And they don’t have their jump drive. And.

“Then that’s it. It’s been an honor.”

And this MUSIC

And then SUDDEN UNEXPECTED PEGASUS

“Damn you, Lee.” “…thank you, Lee.”

Love it.

And Lee is sacrificing Pegasus, putting it right in the center of the basestar formation.

And Kara wakes up and is like “put me down!” and she kisses Sam “is it really you?” “it’s really me, come on, we have to get back to the ships.” “where’s Kacey?” “who’s Kacey?” and yep Starbuck’s running back and Sam goes after her “GODSDAMMIT KARA NO!”

A third line for Simon! “There’s a heavy raider ready to evacuate us.”

The Cylons are pulling back, D’anna says she’ll stay behind to set off the nuke.

“You should go as well, Caprica. …and you. I don’t think you’ll want to be here after we’ve gone. There’s a place for you, too.” “For me?” “You were right and we were wrong. Should be some reward for that.”

“Gaius, we should go.” “I just want to sit here and die.” “You’re gonna get your wish, Gaius.” I LOVE YOU FELIX. And I do remember this confrontation and I love it so much.

Only a few civilian ships left on the ground.

“I believed in you. I believed in the dream of New Caprica.” “Gaeta, we all did,” Caprica tries, and he turns the gun on her. “No! not him. He believed in the dream of Gaius Baltar. The good life. Booze, pills, hot and cold running interns. He led us to the Apocalypse, and I—and I—I turned out to be…” “An idealist,” Gaius says quietly. “There’s no sin in that. Everything you say about me is true. Every word. But you have to listen to me. The Cylons have a nuke in this complex. Nobody…I mean nobody is getting off this planet alive unless I stop D’anna.” “Gaius, she’ll kill you.” “Then she’ll kill me. Or it’ll be down to Mr. Gaeta. Either way, the human race dies with me. Go ahead, shoot. What are you waiting for?” and he pulls the gun up under his chin and says “please. I’m begging you, please.” And that shot of their hands together on the gun. and Felix…still an idealist. Some part of him still a little bit in love with the best parts of Gaius. Gives him the gun. “You have one chance to put things right. Do you understand me? Get the frak out of here! Stop that nuke! Go!”

And Caprica pulls him away, his eyes still locked on Gaeta and. Man that’s another one of my favorite dynamics in this series, all the things that happen between these two. ((there’s a reason I had two versions of my ‘no one mourns the wicked’ icon for these two; one with this scene, the other with gaeta’s execution))

(his finger was actively on the trigger, too, before Gaeta’s hand joined his)

“Good work, and I’ll see you on the other side,” Lee says, when he gives the order to abandon ship.

“You too, Commander.” “Yes, sir.” Lol. But he does take a moment to say goodbye to Pegasus, which has been his home and his command for like a year and a half. “Thank you,” he says.

FUCK I’D FORGOTTEN THAT PEGASUS JUST. STRAIGHT-UP BATTERING RAMS A BASESTAR TO DEATH. TAKING IT WITH IT. WELL FUCKING PLAYED.

And then that piece of debris with the name of the ship.

And it’s eerily quiet under Starbuck yelling for Kacey. And Leoben comes down the stairs with the little girl. “I knew you’d be back. I saw it.”

LEOBEN. STOP. FUCK.

“Say the words. I want to hear it. And I want the rest of it. Like I told you.”

FUCK YOU.

“Fine. You win. I love you.” “Say it again.” And Kacey just looking up at the adults like ? “I love you.” “Now the rest.” And there’s a kiss and. Yikes. Just. Yikes.

“Was it everything you thought it would be?” “That and more. I’ll never forget this moment.” “Neither will I.” More kissing, and then she stabs him. And twists the knife. And Kacey looks down at his body, and here comes Sam!

“I’ll explain later. Let’s move.”

And Caprica and Gaius are looking for D’Anna. And they hear the baby crying!

“Frakking liar,” D’anna says, and then she hears the crying, too.

Poor Maya. Poor, poor Maya.

And Head!Six! “It’s her, Gaius. The first of God’s new generation.” “Hera,” he says.

“It’s a miracle,” Caprica says. “God spared her.”

And he stands up, holding her, as D’anna comes out of the tent.

“Hera,” she breathes. “Can I hold her?” And he hesitates for a moment, and then lets her take the child. And then he turns the gun on her.

“No!” Caprica says. “She won’t set off the nuke. Not anymore. Come on, Gaius. We have to go.”

And he follows her through the ashes and away.

And that shot of Laura back at her desk is Amazing. “All right. I’m ready to go.”

Chief’s face on seeing Kara with a baby. “I thought you were dead!” “Yeah, so did I!”

And then Kacey’s actual mom!!!

And that frozen heartbreak on Kara’s face, and then she forces a smile and.

“But you saved her. Gods bless you.”

That wild look on Kara’s face oh man oh man oh man.

Bill welcoming everyone aboard and Helo and Athena HUGGING and

And then Lee and Dee getting off their raptor and Bill like. “I guess you didn’t understand my orders.” “Never could read your handwriting.” MORE HUGS

“Permission to come aboard sir.” Oh, Saul. Oh poor Saul. “Permission granted.” And they exchange salutes, and. And the looks on their faces. “You did it. You brought ‘em home, Saul.” “Not all of them.” “I’m sorry.”

EMOTIONS. SO MANY EMOTIONS.

And then Bill is pulled away by the celebrating evacuees and Saul is just. Broken. :((((((( and back to Kara’s face and. And and and.

Oh, and there’s Gaeta leaning uncertainly against a raptor and.

EMOTIONS. THAT IS ALL.

“We’re still double-checking the manifests, but it doesn’t look like Maya made it off New Caprica.” “What about the baby?” And Tory just shakes her head. “I was there when the two guards left to take them to their ship. I don’t know what happened. I’m so sorry. I let you down, and I know that.” “No, you didn’t. it’s not your fault.”

…want to remember this for when I get to S4.

“This is bigger than us. This is life.”

And shaving off the moustache!

The FUCKING LIGHTER MUSIC AGAIN

Collaborators:

Gaeta gets the previously-on!

Oh, Jammer.

And Chief isn’t super thrilled about this whole situation but he’s doing it. It is really interesting to watch the faces/feelings/reactions of the different people in the circle.

Oh man Chief just quietly asking “did you do it.”

Okay, three days off of New Caprica at this point. I do love timeline markers! Don’t think we get a whole lot after this (except in No Exit?) but they’re nice while they last, lol.

And Chief didn’t watch the execution, his back was turned. Everyone else did.

Anders is starting to doubt the mission of the circle. Chief…isn’t doubting in the same way, but he hates it.

Nicky is such a cute pudgy baby I wanna squish his li’l cheeks I love him.

Chief asking Cally if Jammer was telling the truth. Too late to change his decision, and it wouldn’t have changed anything either, but he just…wants to know.

“How did you know about that?” Good question Cally.

Back to the usual titles! 41,435.

RIGHT THIS BIT. I love the blooper where Mary McDonnell and James Callis both crack up when she goes in for the kiss. XD

“Oh no.” “What?” “I’m dreaming, aren’t I.” Yes, you are.”

Oh right, the part where he’s just. Naked. For a good chunk of the episode.

I will say that, while this show doesn’t get nearly up to Spartacus’ level, it is pretty good about equal-opportunity nudity. And a fair amount of the nudity isn’t really sexual, just…naked.

…wonder what the last three days on that basestar have been like.

And Sam is trying but he doesn’t really know how to help Kara, and she doesn’t really know what she needs from him, and…

Three more days to swear in a new Quorum! And then we play musical chairs with the Presidency XD

“The whole thing should take less than an hour.” “You’re stepping down without a fight. That means you want something. Why don’t you put your cards on the table, and let’s see if it’s a price I’m willing to pay.” And yeah, Tom’s like “yeah I’m a realist, I know I’m not gonna actually hold on to power, especially since Bill doesn’t like me. But I want to be part of the new government.”

The thing about Tom here is that…yes, he stood up to Baltar/the occupation regime. He is very good at making a gesture/statement/Point like that. It’s a significant chunk of What He Does throughout the course of the series. But there’s these sort of two sides of him, when it comes to his approach as a public/political figure--making a Point, and being ruthlessly practical. Part of him believes at least a portion of his own rhetoric, part of him just wants power. He cultivates being liked as a means to gain and hold power (as a contrast to Baltar, who cultivates power as a means to being liked/respected, or Laura who just wants to get shit done and knows she can do it/looks at the alternatives and…yeah.) Anyway, the point I’m trying to make is that, if he’d been in Baltar’s position on New Caprica, meaning if he’d been President and not VP when the Cylons showed up…I genuinely don’t know which side of him would have won out. Because like I’ve said a couple times, once we get to that point, surrender is the only viable option. And part of Zarek would know that. But he’d also know that, once he made that call, his political career/power base would be absolutely destroyed. Especially given the specific reputation/persona he’s spent the last two years building. Even if he’d managed to get out of Cylon custody and work with the Resistance, even if the alternative to surrender is, best case scenario, he gets shot and they keep going down the chain of command until they find someone who will…so, does President Tom Zarek do the practical thing, or does he take a Stand? As VP, he can afford to take a stand, and show that courage that the Fleet needs, as Laura puts it.

…yeah, there’s a reason my Zarek tag is “and then there’s this asshole (affectionate)” and I might write about him if I write for GBB along with running it. He’s just. Fascinating. There’s so much to dig into here (I mean, there is for most of the characters, that’s kind of what this show Does, but).

…ANYWAY that tangent aside. Presidential musical chairs, resume.

Poor poor ironically named Felix Gaeta. I just wanna give him a hug.

“Who gave this man permission to enter the CIC?” Can’t really blame Tigh. And Helo’s like “Admiral ordered it, to fix the comms.”

And Gaeta just quietly stands there and takes it. “Do you know where my eye is?!”

Bill’s trying to get Saul calmed down, and…yeah, this is all very messy.

“Oh yeah. Just go to sleep. Forget about it all. Just forget about everything. Well I’m not forgetting. I’m not gonna forget.” I really love this in contrast to the way he is very Insistent on keeping things within correct bounds when working with the Circle when Connor wants to be Excessive.

57 more people to try in absentia, three days to do it. “Stop wasting time bitching and moaning. We all knew there was a clock when we signed on to do this.”

Yeah, like I was just saying. Connor “Most of these fraks are so guilty they stink. I can get through 50 of these things in an hour.” And Tigh slams his head into the table, and his voice is. So calm. And like. We know damn well Saul doesn’t have a problem shouting, he does it all the time. And just. Damn. “You think we’re thugs, handing out punishment on a whim? Jammer didn’t get airlocked because you thought he was guilty. There was evidence. You read the witness statements. He was tried and convicted by this circle. This is about justice. You got that? Justice!”

And now Gaeta’s name comes up.

And Tigh is like “You think I want to do this? I stood next to him in the CIC for four years. He was like family. But the fact remains he was Chief of Staff to Gaius Baltar, and that alone is enough to convict him.”

Anders is like “we don’t have any hard evidence, no witness statements, it’s not enough.” Chief agrees. Tigh points out that Baltar probably wasn’t directly running things because…the man has certain skills but. “He was the public face, but Gaeta was the brains. Everyone knew that.” And…honestly, during the year before the occupation, that’s almost certainly true. If only because Gaeta knew if he didn’t do it, Zarek would. Anything that actually did get done was probably mostly Gaeta. …or Zarek, depending on the specific thing.

“We don’t know what Gaeta did or didn’t do when he saw that list.” And Barolay’s like “you see a list like that, and you do nothing about it?”

And they call the question. And Sam’s like “No. I’m done. War’s over for me. I’m sorry.” Conner wants to push ahead without him, Jean’s like “we do need six votes.” Chief’s like “we don’t have six votes, I’m out too.” And Tigh, whatever his other personal feelings, has to agree. Because he wants to do this right. This is about justice.

Oh my god D’anna is so pretty in that dress.

“How are you, Gaius?” “…I’m alive, I suppose that’s something.”

((Also it is. Definitely my headcanon that the pills are 95% to shut Head!Six up. They didn’t really work; she was quiet for other reasons, but.))

The way her fingers linger when she hands them to him, though. And the way he pulls away when she sits down on the couch. “You’ll have to excuse me, I’m slightly confused. …how long have I been here, exactly?” “Three days.”

And the vote to let him stay/live is deadlocked. Three to three. And the Sixes are the swing vote, which surprises him. (I…wonder if it’s along the same lines otherwise as the Cylon civil war? The Threes are definitely voting to let him stay; the Ones are definitely voting to ditch him; the Fives probably follow the Ones’ lead. Probably the Eights are voting in his favor, but the Twos and Fours…)

Aaaaand yeah there are Missing Persons reports that Lee has to bring up. And ‘thousands’ of people got left behind on New Caprica, which is helpfully vague ((for fic/rp numbers I’ve used whatever number feels right in the moment))

Lee’s like “no, these are people we know got out, like Jammer.” “…yeah, I just saw him yesterday.”

So, thirteen people are missing, that means thirteen Circle executions. Plus 57 people left to try. Given that they were complaining about the time constraint for the remainder, probably we can assume no more than half of that have already been tried, especially since it probably took Zarek a day or so to set things up, pick his people, etc. There are 70 people on the list For Sure. If we assume maybe a handful don’t get convicted (or aren’t known to have gone missing after evacuating the planet)… 75 is a nice round number of people for Zarek to prioritize. Or maybe 72, that’s a multiple of twelve. Or 84, maybe. I don’t think any higher than that, though.

Ugh this FUCKING subplot again I hate it I hate it I hate it so much. “Hey, I dropped half a stone.” “Keep jumping.” HATE.

And Gaeta is isolated, and Starbuck is glaring at him from across the room, and she approaches and he…wants to believe she’s willing to talk to him. But he’s wary and. Can’t blame him.

“I heard about your situation.” “Right. I just try not to think about it anymore. You know? Kinda like you.”

“What do you want me to say? Maybe I could’ve done more, but when the Cylons landed, I thought it was important for me to keep my job. To help from the inside.” “By propping Baltar up and letting the Cylons walk all over us?” “No! I fed information to the resistance. I set up dead drops. There was a dog bowl. I passed along Cylon positions, internal memoranda…” “Riiiiight, Felix. You’re a frakking hero.”

And he leaves. Because what else can he do at this point.

And Caprica looks so sad. “Whatever feelings I had for you have to stop. I let my feelings cloud my judgment. I protected you. I gave your species a second chance. I even turned against a sister Cylon, and for what? I’m a Cylon, Gaius. Somehow I lost sight of that.” “You are much, much more than a machine. You’re a person. A real person. A woman. And you’re in love with me. And it hurts. I know it hurts. But believe me, I am the only one that can make it better. Don’t you see? I am the only one.” …yeah, you started out okay there, Gaius, if you had stopped with ‘I know it hurts’ or pivoted to ‘because it hurts me too’ or something along those lines…buuuuuuut nope. XD

He's not allowed out of the room, Centurion blocks his way. And then belatedly. “And I need you too! ……….maybe I should’ve started with that.”

((once again, resisting the urge to go on a long tangent about the two of them and their relationship, lol. Look, I love them, I’m invested in their eventual happy ending; I get very different things from the two of them than my other primary ships in this fandom; there’s a Lot to unpack particularly in this phase of their relationship and why it falls apart here despite the fact that they never stop loving each other and Because Destiny Said So is in play.))

Kara joins the Circle! And Tigh is very, very clear on the rules, because it is important to him. …probably because that’s one of the ways he can live with himself. Especially after Ellen.

And it really is interesting, the way Sam (and Chief) are trying to walk away from the hell they went through, trying to move on and keep living. Sam walks away, decides he needs a clean break; Chief stays involved because maybe he thinks the Circle needs someone with that perspective on it. And Tigh in his own way is clinging to that…especially given his line about being demons down there on that planet. Clinging so hard to doing this right. To making it justice, and not chaotic vengeful bloodshed like it was before.

“It’s not about settling scores or personal grudges. It’s a jury.” “We’re just dealing with the worst of the worst. People who did more than put on an NCP uniform or make a deal with the Cylons.” Yeah, because…well, like I said before, the Vast Majority of people are going to mostly keep their heads down and try to survive. And that is going to involve, for a lot of them, a limited level of cooperation, and where you draw the line between that and collaboration is important. And, like, look at Cottle and his sense of medical ethics. (lol if Zarek did try to put him on the Circle’s list he was definitely acquitted, but I genuinely don’t think his name came up. Just. A thought that occurred XD)

“None of this is legal, right?” Kara asks. “No, it’s legal,” Chief says. And shows her the orders from Zarek. “…you’ve got to be kidding me.” And Tigh asks for her commitment. And she’s in.

They give her a minute to go over the evidence. And Chief once again points out that they don’t know what Gaeta might have done when he saw that list.

…I bet Chief is wondering if Gaeta was his source. I’m sure a part of him is hoping he was. He likes Gaeta, Gaeta is a likeable dude. He liked Jammer, too, but Jammer’s guilt was a lot more unambiguous and also he wasn’t in a position to be the inside source. [for crossover purposes where I headcanon Chief as Force-sensitive…possible evidence? Lol.]

“My gods, the whole things like a bad dream, only we woke up and the traitors are all still here.” And Kara votes guilty immediately. Seelix says it has to be unanimous, and turns to Chief, who’s the last to vote. And Sam interrupts to talk to Kara. Tigh agrees because she’s already voted. …there’s a Thing here, about Tigh and his sense of duty and loyalty, but I can’t quite find the words for it. Maybe when I get to Crossroads.

“I quit because I’m not looking for ways to keep killing people.” “I need this, Sam.” “What, throwing a few people out an airlock is going to make you feel better about yourself? Because believe me, those aren’t the people who kept you locked in that room.” “They’ll do! And not just for me, but for every person we left back on that planet. Someone’s gotta pay. So you can either get with it, or you can get lost.” “Is that what you want, Kara? You want me to leave?”

“A lot of good people had to pay the price for what they did. Choices they made on New Caprica. Like my wife. And I liked her a lot more than I like Gaeta.” I do love that line.

“Look, Sam…I’m in a different place now. I…I don’t know how else to explain it to you. But I got out of that cell, and it’s like someone painted the world in different colors. And I look at you…and I wanna tear your eyes out just for looking at me. I just wanna hurt someone, and it might as well be you. So you should probably go before that happens.” :((((((((((((( I want to hug both of them so much.

“Baltar, not Gaeta.” “It’s the same damn thing.” “He’s right, Chief. A lot of people died because of them.” And Chief caves, and votes guilty.

Oh no oh no he’s giving her back the dog tags I’m gonna cry :((((((((

“Sam—” and then she pulls him back and kisses him and. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. And then she walks away. And that shot of him alone on the deck in semi-darkness I just. Babies. I love them.

And Gaeta is offered a chance to defend himself…after conviction. And he looks to Chief, who begs him to talk. “We’ll listen.” And then Connor cuts in. And Jean is like “say something.” And Felix says, “what’s the point? I already tried to explain. I’m not gonna beg.” And I can’t really blame him. “Too bad you didn’t grow that spine four months ago,” Tigh says. And Felix remains quiet. But Kara, in her blind unfocused rage and pain, saves him. Unintentionally.

“Beg. Beg.” “Thrace—” “No. Beg. Come on, Felix. Tell ‘em how you were working for the resistance the entire time. COME ON! Tell them about all the important information you gave them. Tell them about the messages, and the dog bowl, and everything else.” And that catches Chief’s attention! “What? What did she just say? What did you say to her? Tell me. What did you say to her?” “There was a yellow dog bowl. It was a signal. It meant there was a message in the garbage dump. I turned it over. It was a signal. It meant there was a message in the garbage dump.” “…that was you. Oh, my g—” And he cuts him free. “There was a yellow dog bowl. I used it. You were wondering who the source was, Colonel. There’s no other way he could’ve known. He’s the only other one who would’ve known.”

And Gaeta just quietly says. “I did what I could.” And slowly gets to his feet. “I don’t know what else I could’ve done.” And he walks through them and away. And the Look Chief and Tigh share.

And Bill and Laura are calling Zarek on this crap. …and Tory is there, too! Because all of the Five have to be involved in this (except Ellen). I doubt she says anything but the fact that she’s There.

“They have a jury. But they don’t get lawyers. They don’t get to showboat for weeks on end while they find ways to blame the system. And they don’t get lasting fame as martyrs or innocent people just in the wrong place at the wrong time. They just disappear. Now. In the grey twilight between the long night of the occupation and the dawn of a new era. You come into office clean, without their blood on your hands.” “Well, thank you. That’s very poetic.” A) I love the look on her face that’s like “someone’s speaking from Direct Personal Experience don’t think I’ve forgotten how you became a household name Tom” and B) just the way she cuts him off I love everything about this. And the boundaries she works to set, just like when she and Tigh were arguing about suicide bombers on New Caprica.

“You think by making the trials public, you’ll find justice?” “Yes, I do.” “Come on, Laura, you’re not that naïve. Let me tell you what’ll happen, if these cases go to trial. It’ll consume this fleet for months, maybe years. People will be lining up to testify against their neighbors. It’ll be a circus, an entertainment for the mob, and you’ll be signing death warrants every day. Is that how you want to spend your term, Laura? As executioner-in-chief?” he’s not Entirely wrong here and she knows it and she hates all of it. Which is why she does what she does next; if he hadn’t had the Circle in play, maybe she would’ve done something different re: the amnesty (like she says she was planning to do), but…again. He’s Not Entirely Wrong. But definitely after Zarek did what he did, she’s backed into a corner there.

Also oh man her speech playing over Kara hanging up the dog tags Sam gave her back and Saul finding Ellen’s clothes and hanging them up and…

“We all feel the need for justice, and we all feel the need for vengeance, and telling the difference between the two can be difficult at times.” And the way it panned over Zarek and Bill there was. Amazing.

And cutting to Baltar and Caprica on the basestar when she says “we are all victims of the Cylons, and none of us can be impartial.”

Caprica leaving Gaius clothes; she did vote to let him stay in the end.

“There will be no prosecutions. I am issuing a general pardon for every human being in this fleet. This will not be a popular move today, but I truly believe this is the only way for us to move forward in strength. In the spirit of healing and reconciliation.” And that it goes to Tory when she says that.

And lol once again Bill leads the applause for Laura I love it.

Gaeta still eating alone. Until Chief goes over to him.

I do appreciate that Gaeta didn’t have to cut his hair again when he resumed his military position. I like Floofy!Gaeta XD

Torn:

This weird-ass fucking arc here we go!

Baltar gets the previously-on.

Hurray for beachside fantasies! ((…I mean, I know some of it is because of the lakehouse, but it is interesting how many of his fantasies involve water. Mostly in context of the Selkie AU which I probably will write more of someday XD) And Head!Six is back. “I thought you’d abandoned me to your Cylon comrades.” “Would I do that?” “You’ve always been more…unpredictable than your flesh and blood counterparts.” “A man who loves women as much as you do should’ve learned that a long time ago.” “I’m a slow learner.” “Then take this period to learn all you can about the Cylons. You’ll need it in the days ahead.” And now she tells him about projection! “What are you, really? You’re either connected to the woman I knew on Caprica, or you’re a damaged part of my subconscious struggling for self-expression. So which is it?” “I’m an angel of God sent here to help you. Just as I always have been.”

And he’s no less afraid (of her) when he wakes up, for all he pretends not to be in the dream.

((and now I’m distracted by wondering where the clothes he was given came from. Were they. Like. Just what he was wearing when they left New Caprica, only cleaned? Did they get taken from one of the Fives? I mean, they’re a little too…sedate in color for that But XD))

Yeaaaaah time would Absolutely not feel real in that room, especially when he’s alone most of the time.

“We’re all part of one big ecosystem.” “…yes, I can feel it breathing…” that’s Fascinating and I love it.

And then Caprica comes in and D’Anna pulls away a little. And they start asking him questions about Earth. “Do you know how to find it?” “Not really, no. That’s unfortunate. There was a hope—my hope—that if you knew about Earth, it would justify keeping you alive a little longer.” “Wait. Wait! When I say I do not know exactly where Earth is, that is not to say I don’t know a great deal about it’s possible location. I spent hours—days—weeks—months!” Lol. I mean, he’s actually probably telling the truth here; along with the other projects he was working on for the science part of his job. But just. Watching him flail after D’anna pulls that “what a shame” thing.

And Caprica is still being a little distant. “We’ll get back to you.”

And he asks the real question! “Why do you care about finding Earth?” and the look on his face when D’anna tells him “we’ve decided it’s going to be our new home.”

41,422!

Back to training exercises; Lee and Starbuck are back in their cockpits, Helo is still acting XO.

Aaaaaand collision when Starbuck ignored orders and went out of formation.

“How’d you land this thing?” “Pointed it towards the deck and stopped when I got here.” Lol.

Lee benches Starbuck which. Yeah honestly kinda fair at the moment.

And Tigh is hallucinating Ellen’s voice! And he goes into the hall looking for her and…

…

Yeah.

https://textsfrombsg.tumblr.com/post/6491550426/submitted-by-derevko

Awwww, Kacey!

“Gimme a hug!”

I wonder when it changed from Camp Oil Slick to Dogsville.

“The last thing I need is a two-year-old friend. And Kacey does not need me in her life. So do us both a favor and don’t bring her around here again.” Can’t really blame Julia for being Annoyed, but also…yeaaaaaaaah.

FUCK THIS SUBPLOT WITH A RUSTY SPOON.

And yep, he wasn’t lying, Gaeta’s building on the same research. “If there was one thing I learned about Baltar, it was his extraordinary capacity for self-preservation. I think he wanted to find Earth because he wanted to get there.” That is. Certainly at least partially true. And also probably part of it was that it was an interesting and challenging Science Problem for him to solve.

“Initially, I thought the doctor might be off his meds as well.” That shouldn’t be as funny as it is XD

I do love that little flash of her soft smile as they’re walking down the hallway and he’s bitching about his conflicted feelings.

Random naked Eight doing her naked Tai Chi because Eights are just very comfortable with their bodies XD and he’s distracted for a moment because…well, yeah, and then he’s like “…sorry, didn’t mean to intrude.” And LOL him putting his hand up to cover his eyes as Caprica drags him away.

And he gets her to actually explain projecting. “Have you ever daydreamed and imagined you were somewhere else?” “…I have an active imagination.” LOL “We choose to see our environment in any way we wish. You see us as standing in a hallway, but I see it as a forest. Filled with trees, birds, sunlight…” “Like the walks you and I used to take. On Caprica.” “…the aesthetic is what gives me pleasure. Not the specific memories.”

I wonder if they can do this outside of basestars, or if they need the network/datastream to do it?

“Instead of looking at blank walls, I choose to surround myself with a vision of God’s creation.”

And now he’s back on the beach with Head!Six. …and starts to wonder if it’s the same. “Is it a coincidence?” she asks. “What are you saying? Is there a connection? Because of my experiences with you—am I a Cylon?!”

And back to Caprica. “What was that?” “…nothing. Just thinking out loud. Silly me.”

((Like, I know that the writers specifically had a rule that anyone other than Roslin or Adama was fair game for a Cylon reveal, but I genuinely think that it could never have been Baltar. It would have broken too many mythology and thematic rules. He and Helo are the ones who never could be Cylons because of the way the narrative is structured around them; Bill and Laura could never be revealed as Cylons because of the emotional rules/core of the story.))

And Racetrack is willing to fly second chair for Athena, and calls her Boomer, and she’s like “…that was someone else.” And then Helo gets everyone to pitch new callsigns and most of them are terrible jokes (as callsigns often are) but then someone suggests Athena and. Yep! …and by someone I mean Hotdog XD “usually accompanied by the goddess of victory” and the little SMILE the Agathons share and their hands and that little kiss and I love them.

Aaaaand in comes Tigh who’s still in a Mood.

Dead Man’s Chest is apparently another card game besides Triad!

Aaaaaaaand now Kat is needling at the gap/wound between the people who were on the planet and the people who were in the fleet and.

Helo does briefly step in to defend the crew, but knows when to back down, even when Tigh takes a…not even really a shot at Athena, more at the whole Situation. “While you were pinning wings on your Cylon girlfriend, our people were strapping bombs to their chests to take the bastards out. So forgive me if I don’t get all misty about your sacrifices.”

Kara and Saul have never gotten along quite as well, it’s a problem.

“You seem distracted, Gaius.” “…do I?” “You can rest easy. Your navigational data and your rescue of the child have gone a long way to convincing the others, for now.” And then he’s doing the math, and she starts softening a little, “I used to think that you and I might have a baby one day…”

(still clinging to my headcanon that the glowyspine is related to conception, even though I know there’s an Official explanation)

“There are twelve Cylon models, but in the entire occupation, I only ever saw seven. Here, only the same seven. Who are the final five?” “I can’t talk about them.” “Can’t, or won’t?” “I can’t. it’s complicated, but we don’t talk about them.”

Aaaaand now we get to the Actual plot of this episode! “Six, we have a problem.”

Basestar hybrid yay!!!!

The datastream here is fairly literal and it’s kind of beautiful.

And that Four does seem to think the disease would download with the victims which…I don’t think that makes a whole lot of sense but what do I know. …but it is probably better to assume it might and take precautions just in case.

And Head!Six orders him to volunteer. “You have to prove to them you can be counted on in an emergency. Show them you’re worth keeping alive.” “And if you are a Cylon, one of the five you haven’t seen yet, wouldn’t you rather just die and get it over with?”

And he does volunteer, and Caprica’s face when she says “what?”

“A truly selfless act…” Well. Not really. But.

“Here’s to knowing that someone will always have your back.” “The sentiment’s good, but in my book, trust is an overrated commodity.” And everyone’s drunk and everyone’s still hurting and Kat and Kara are always good at Escalating a situation.

“Every colonist that landed on New Caprica was loyal…to a point. It was amazing watching those people that you thought you knew go over to the Cylons.” Yesssssssss.

And Helo’s like “I…really don’t want to talk about the problems Tigh and Kara are causing, in part because Kara is one of my best friends, and in part because after my own experiences in occupied territory and coming back to the fleet, I do get it. But the Admiral is asking me directly, so…I can’t not.” “Suddenly, it’s like if you weren’t in the ground war, you can’t be trusted.” “They’re destroying morale and unit cohesion.” “They both know better.” “I don’t think they care, sir.” Right now, no.

“Atrophy. Don’t ask me how. I’ll be dead in a thousand light years.” I really genuinely love the basestar hybrids, they’re Amazing.

Also the way all these…disconnected/sort of floating/almost…dissociated isn’t the word I want but. Just. The Vibe of these sequences on the basestar during these first couple episodes is Really Cool.

Also Baltar in a flight suit is the weirdest fucking visual XD

Lol, of course the Twos are the ones who pay attention to the Hybrids’ babbling.

“She is the baseship in a very real sense.” “Mind gone mad.” “She experiences life very differently than we do, Gaius. She swims in the heavens, laughs at stars, breathes in cosmic dust…maybe Leoben is right. Maybe she does see God.”

And that ‘to know the face of god is to know madness’ (with the ‘to love another person is to see the face of god’ corollary) pops back into my head…

Oh man the creepy floaty dead raiders.

He’s trying to be detached and analytical but. His face. At least until he sees the beacon they brought on board.

“I would never do anything to hurt you.” Oh, man, this scene with this Six. Just. Oh shit. And she asked him to kill her, and he doesn’t want to, and then she accuses him of doing this on purpose and does she believe that or is she trying to get him to do what she asked in the first place and then he does and. Man.

Oh shit. “I see nothing. Nothing of consequence. There’s nothing left to do here.”

“Whatever you think I did, I didn’t do it, honestly!” “We followed your coordinates and found a disease with no treatment or cure.”

And they’re arguing and then D’anna just slams her hand into the datastream. And they have to abandon that basestar. And the Hybrid is screaming.

“Mists of dreams drip along the nascent echo, and love no more. End of line.”

“The Hybrid objects.” “She doesn’t get a vote. Jump the ship.”

“You noticed nothing suspicious on the infected ship?” And Caprica finds the proof he’s lying when he says ‘nothing,’ as she goes through the pictures he took.

And Bill goes to talk to Kara and Saul.

“Give me your sidearm.” “…what?” “Your sidearm.” And she has no idea what’s going on, but she does pull out the gun for him. He cocks it and tosses it back on the table.

“There’s a live round in that!” Tigh says. “One of you, I don’t care who, pick that up and shoot me,” Bill says. “Admiral, I don’t—” “I didn’t say to talk. You’ve done enough of that already. I said to pick up that weapon and shoot.” “You gonna turn the rest of my pilots against each other? Poison the crew? You’ve already done that. Both of you.” “Yeah, well, if you’re looking for an apology—” and he shoves her chair over. “You were like a daughter to me once. No more. You’re malcontented and a cancer. And I won’t have you on my ship. So you have a choice. You figure out how to become a human being again and an officer, or you can find another place to live, off of this ship. You’re dismissed.” That first bit was a lie, she is still his daughter. But. “You gonna kick me out of my chair, too? Don’t patronize me. Say what you came here to say.” “If you need time, Saul, you take all the time you want. But I gotta run a ship. The last thing I need is a one-eyed drunk sitting down here sowing discontent and disobedience. So I’ll tell you again Saul. You can pick up that gun and kill me, or you can go back to your quarters until you’re ready to act like the man I’ve known for the past thirty years.” And Saul empties the gun. “That man doesn’t exist anymore, Bill. And you won’t be seeing me again.”

Man. Just. The way he gets from there to how he reacts to the Reveal at the end of the season I just. I love Saul. Every time I watch this show, I love him more and more.

And Kara is cutting off her hair and everyone’s just kind of baaaaaacking away from her and her knife. But she is resetting, as best she can.

And Saul is just. Back in his quarters. Drinking.

And she goes to see Kacey yay!!!!

Who really is a very adorable two-year-old. And probably swears as much as Kara now XD

Oh Kara’s face when she holds her my heart :(((((((((

And Saul staring at the picture and holding Ellen’s jacket and……..man.

And Racetrack is so excited to see the nebula! And Athena’s like “something is Off” and then they see the drifting raiders and the basestar and… “When God’s anger awakens, even the mighty shall fall.” “Frak, Athena, we need to get out of here!!!”

A Measure of Salvation:

Previously on is…Lee, maybe? Maybe Helo? Does Helo ever get a previously-on?

Oh man the way they keep cutting to Athena as they board the basestar and. Anxiety.

Also everyone else has a helmet even lee why doesn’t she get one.

(also lol because Dean Stockwell is Sir Not Appearing In This Two Parter there are no dead Ones XD At least the Fours get stuff to do this episode…)

Oh, man, Athena’s face when she kneels next to her dead brother.

And now she’s putting her hand in the data stream and I know she’s immune but aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Oh god the datastream is all sludgy. “You sure you want to do that?” “It’s how it works.”

And Lee’s brevet promotion to Commander has been revoked, he’s back to Major.

Five living Cylons! A Two, a Four, a Six, an Eight, a Five.

And they’re praying.

Athena cradles her sister Eight’s head. Eight calls her a traitor, then tells her to save herself. “Get away from us.” And the Six tells her the same thing that other Six told Gaius.

“Infected?” “…son of a bitch!” Lol Matthias’s tone XD

“Uh, Galactica, Apollo. We have a situation down here.” You sure do!

((lol imagine if their recon ran into Gaius and the other basestar that would’ve gone real weird real fast I’m sure someone’s written that fic but))

41,420! …wait, who died in the last episode I’m confused.

Yay Cottle! And yeah, this is Absolutely the kind of shit the military would have an Established Procedure for, he just has to brief command on the specifics since it’s his department.

And yeah, while Cottle wanting the beacon to study makes sense, Bill deciding it’s too risky also makes perfect sense, so he doesn’t fight it and just moves on to the question of the five survivors/prisoners.

“How many prisoners?” “How many you got?”

And the basestar goes Boom!

“Massive energy discharge from the basestar! …it exploded, sir.”

Back to the other basestar for a little light torture!

“How long have you planned to betray us?” Yeah, because that was a STUPID lie you told. Like. I get that you were panicking because of that Six and what she said but like. Lying about the beacon when you already have a picture of it is going to cause you way more problems than it solves!

And Caprica’s crushed face, and D’anna’s disappointment.

“You’re only making this harder on yourself.” “We know about the beacon, Gaius. You knew it was out there. You knew it contained a deadly virus.” “This is a most profound understanding. Yes, I did discover it on the baseship, and I should’ve told you sooner, but I thought you’d link me to the virus, I was wrong, it was a mistake, it will never happen again, and…”

And Caprica is on the edge of tears because after everything she does still love him. “I’m sorry, Gaius.” As the Centurions come in.

And D’anna’s little sad smile. “Things would have been so much simpler had you only told the truth.” And she adds, very matter-of-factly, “We think you know more about this virus, and we intend to find out.”

“Relax. Have a drink.” Head!Six says. “I can’t. The pain.” “It’s all in your head, Gaius. Pain, pleasure, they’re all just neural impulses sent to the brain. You decide how to interpret them. They can be pleasant…or unpleasant.”

[gotta love when I’m watching this particular torture scene and the dog interrupts saying ‘throw the ball plz’ XD]

[I did in fact pause to throw the ball what kind of monster do you think I am]

And Caprica’s face as she listens to him scream, and turns and walks away. And the look D’Anna gives her is soft, and sympathetic. Almost empathetic.

“I want it to stop, Gaius. I don’t want you to feel this pain. And neither does Caprica, do you?” “No.” “I love you,” he says, looking at Caprica, and her face oh man.

“You feel anything yet?” “Yeah, I feel sick. Sick of you bugging me.” “You didn’t touch any infected skinjobs.” “Not my fault you’re clumsy.” “You can kiss my infected ass.” Lol I love Hotdog. And Racetrack. I’m getting better at recognizing her out of her helmet!

“Well, you can kiss it, but it’s not infected.” LOL COTTLE I LOVE YOU.

And humans are immune but Athena still might not be so she has to stay in quarantine. And oh no Helo waiting outside and his face. “Please tell me she’s okay.” And Helo very briefly accuses Cottle of prejudice, but is more focused on reassuring Sharon as best he can and then “you come for me the second you know” and I love those two so fucking much.

Cottle goes to check on the prisoners, and has them take the Five. “He’s the furthest gone.” And he can’t cure them, but he can keep them alive.

And some medical technobabble about a vaccine but Cylons have an antibody that will break it down so it won’t function as a cure, and they’ll need several injections in close intervals. It’ll treat it but not cure it.

Lee asks “should we bother keeping them alive.” Which. …I mean, yeah, it does need to be asked. Helo suggests keeping them alive to question for intelligence. And Bill agrees, with Roslin pointing out that dangling the vaccine as a bribe to get them to talk might work. “They don’t need to know it’s a stop-gap.” So far, so good, but I do know how this meeting ends soooooooo yeah.

Hey, we’re using Helo’s name! “Karl’s wife called it ‘the prayer to the cloud of the unknowing’.” I think that’s. like. One of three or four times in the Entire Series someone calls him Karl, lol. “She said they only use it when they’re facing an imminent death that’s final, no chance of resurrection. They were ready to die.” And Laura points out, just because they’re ready to die doesn’t mean they don’t want to live/none of them would take the chance if it was offered.

And the Four takes it!

God I love his voice.

“It infected everything. Baseship. Raiders. Centurions. Until we were finally abandoned by the other Cylon ships.” “Why not just put you under quarantine until they found a cure?” “Fear of spreading the disease. They told us there was a bioelectric feedback component to the pathogen, it corrupts how our brains manage our immune systems. If one of us dies and is resurrected, the disease will follow, infecting the resurrection ship and the fleet.” I still say this makes very little sense, but again if there’s Even A Chance I can understand not wanting to take the risk. “Why were you in this area?” “We were sent here to look for the lion nebula. Baltar…said it would point the way to Earth.” And reveals that Baltar is alive and on the baseship, helping them find Earth! Huh, I thought they didn’t know until the algae planet, guess I misremembered.

“We want a new beginning. Much like you. I gave you information. She said that there was a cure.” “Doc Cottle will be giving you the medicine.”

The Fours really do need more love [which is why there’s one in TOB]

…I still feel like it’s weird that Lee is the one who immediately jumps to genocide via biowarfare. I mean, not that he’s willing to do it, but that it was his idea. …granted, I’m not sure whose idea it should have been, out of the people in the room. But…ah well, this is a Weird Ass Arc anyway.

“You sure the virus will download into a new body?” “The Cylons are sure of it.” Again, even if they’re not sure, making the choice to sacrifice the infected basestar Just In Case is a horrible but…you can see the logic of the decision. Even if the Hybrid objected. So, if we’re going this route, following that same logic only in reverse “we can’t be sure but it’s worth trying.” “The fact that they left their wounded out there to die alone with no hope of rescue tells me all I need to know.”

And Helo is the one who calls it what it is. Using the word genocide.

“They’re not human. They were built, not born. No fathers, no mothers, no sons, no daughters.” “I had a daughter. I held her in my arms.” “She was half-human. These are things. Dangerous things.” “You can rationalize it any way you want. We do this, we’re no different than they are.” And Laura says, “I respectfully disagree. They started this war, and not being content with wiping out billions of human beings, they pursued us relentlessly through the galaxy, determined to wipe us out.” And then Helo brings up what they were trying on New Caprica which. Was a Mistake. Because he’s not wrong but that is Not the argument to use.

((also this whole situation is…weird, the writing is weird, Choices Were Made.))

“You would serve your fleet better if you would remember that the Cylons are a deadly enemy of the human race.” “I’m talking about right and wrong. I’m talking about losing a piece of our souls. No one wants to hear that, right? Let’s keep it on me. Yeah, I’m married to a Cylon. Who walked through hell for all of us how many times? And she’s not half anything. How do we know there aren’t others like her? She made a choice. She’s a person.” This is absolutely true; but there’s a point (and we’re past that point) that you can’t wait and hope for that. “They’re a race of people. Wiping them out with a biological weapon is a crime against—it’s a crime against humanity.” “But they’re not human, they’re programmed,” Lee says. “We will take your input under advisement,” Laura says. “Thank you both.”

And once again, we have a lot of that same rhetoric used—for the suicide bombers, for how the Circle was supposed to operate…that recurring theme of ‘we have to be worthy of survival’/’there are some boundaries we have to maintain/some lines we Cannot Cross or we will lose ourselves.’ And the Pegasus arc, too. And just. …again, this arc is weird for a lot of reasons but it does hit hard on that point once again and does so fairly well.

Back to the torture porn! …well I think I’m funny. …although actually the torture isn’t super graphic. Although the minimal BGM, just the machine whining and Baltar’s shaky breathing and occasionally screaming is. Effective.

“I can guide you through the torment and beyond, but you have to do the work.” “I’ll do anything,” he tells Head!Six. and D’anna hears him. “Tell us what we want to know,” she says, softly. “Look at me,” Head!Six says. “When you make love to me, you don’t always think about me.” LOL. “Your mind wanders, I know that. You think of equations, puzzles, your laundry…” okay I love that ‘equations’ is on that list just. What a Delightful character note. “It’s the nature of the mind to disconnect from the body, enjoining on its own. Separate your mind from your body. Keep your mind in that room. Use your intellect against her. Reason. Logic. Analysis. Find the holes in her psyche.” “I can’t—the pain—” “The pain’s only in your body. So keep your body here with me. Don’t worry. I’ll take care of it.”

“This is what the absence of pain feels like,” D’anna says. And that little almost wink. “It’s easy to forget.” This is so fucked up I love it.

“It was a coincidence.” “There’s no such thing as coincidence. God wills the universe according to his design.” “Focus on her. As a Cylon, not a woman. Be a scientist. Examine her faith.” As she starts undoing her dress.

“I’m a scientist. And as a scientist, I believe if God exists, our knowledge of him is imperfect. Why? Because the stories and myths we have are the products of men. The passage of time. Religion in practice is based on a theory. Impossible to prove, yet you bestow it with absolutes like “there is no such thing as coincidence.”” “It’s called faith.” “Absolute belief in God’s will means there’s a reason for everything. Everything. And yet…you can’t help asking yourself how God can allow death and destruction and then despise yourself for asking, but the truth is, if we knew God’s will, we’d all be gods, wouldn’t we?” I love that last line so much. “I can see it in your eyes, D’Anna. You’re frustrated. You’re conflicted. Let me help you. Let me help you change. Find a way to reconcile your faith with fact. Find a way toward a rational universe.” As she’s selecting her next torture instrument.

“Give your body to me. Only your mind is there. Feel me. Feel this where she wants you to feel pain. Look at me. Look at me, Gaius. Do you want me to believe you’re worth saving? Do you? Say it.” “I want you to believe in me! Don’t stop! Don’t stop! Please! Please, don’t stop! You have to believe in me! You’re all I have left!” and D’Anna’s face, because as far as she knows, he’s talking to her. “Now tell me you believe in me. Tell me you believe in my strength!” “I believe in you! I believe in you.” And he whispers, crying, “I love you with all my heart.” And that’s. that’s a lot of blood from his ear. Wow.

And D’anna just sort of…petting him as he passes out.

YAY ATHENA IS OKAY! “Something about fetal blood cells, whatever, I’m immune” aww that tacklehug the way she jumps up to him I LOVE THEM THEY’RE SO CUTE ONLY GOOD THINGS FOR THE FIGHTING AGATHONS. “Our baby saved my life. She’s gone forever, and she saved my life. Hera kept us together.” And she’s unfastening his belt for Victory Sex and he can’t help thinking about the genocide that’s being discussed, and he tells her what the plan is. And she starts crying. “The infection’s gonna spread everywhere.” And he’s crying a little, too. That shaky breath before it cuts to Bill and Laura.

(Also I love her curled up in her chair super cute.)

“There’s a point I’d like to make,” Bill says. “The law forbids me to use biological weapons without a direct Presidential order.” “Which means you’re passing the buck.” “On this one, yes. Helo’s right on one thing. We start destroying entire races, even mechanical races, we’re liable to tear off a piece of man’s soul.” “The Cylons are coming to Earth. If they find us, they’re coming for us. Those are the stakes. They always have been, Bill.”

And Athena is. Not going to fight it. “You think I don’t know that? I made a choice to wear a uniform. To be a person.” “You were a person before you put on that uniform, okay? You were a person before I fell in love with you. You don’t have to prove that.” “I have to prove it every day. Let me tell you something, Helo. My people may die. My entire race may be wiped out. But this Cylon will keep her word, even if that means she’s the last Cylon left in the universe. Can a human being do that?”

“Posterity doesn’t really look too kindly on genocide.” “You’re making an assumption that posterity will define this as genocide. If they do, at least there’ll be someone alive to hate us for it.” …yeah. Yeah, that is a point she’s making. I don’t know that it outweighs the rest, but…it is a point. “The Cylons are our mistake. We created them.” And she gives the order. “The use of biological weapons is authorized.” “So say we all.” “So say we all.”

Athena is even flying in the mission oh man.

Starbuck’s back in her cockpit, yay!

And Helo is Doing A Thing because Helo is a Good Man and he will not cross this line, even if it means he has to cross another.

Gotta love when murdering five people is the lesser of two evils.

And there’s Something about Gaeta relaying the ‘terminate the prisoners’ order after All of the Everything.

And Lee is leading the execution party. Along with Matthias. Only to find the prisoners are all already dead in their cell.

“They were dead before the resurrection ship was in range. They didn’t download the disease. We missed our window.”

“Seems like they’re always coming for one of us.” Aww, Helo. “I’m not a traitor. I love my people. I love this ship. Besides you, the first thing I wanna see on any morning are the lights in that CIC. I did what I thought was right. If it was a mistake, fine, I can live with that. It’s you I can’t live without.” And she holds him. And I love them both so much. “I’ll always love you, Helo.”

“Someone did this manually,” Bill says. “Someone?” Laura asks. “Seems to me there’s only one or two likely suspects. Who will lead the investigation?” “No one. I’m closing the book on this one.” “How convenient.” And it was an accidental contamination based on Cottle’s findings. “According to Cottle, the virus was an exact match to one reported over 3000 years ago, right around the time the 13th colony left Kobol.” “The beacon was a signpost to Earth.” “We’re on the right trail.” “So are the Cylons.”

Well that was certainly a two-parter! But I love Helo and Athena so goddamn much, that’s what I’m choosing to care about right now, lol.

Hero:

Another weird one, hurray. Uh, to be completely honest, I have very little memory of this episode? I mean, I remember the broad/overall plot but no real Specifics. …probably because none of this is ever mentioned again.

Bill gets the previously-on!

Hi Corinne!

I think these flashbacks are recent enough that we won’t have to see that crappy wig from the ones in the beginning of S2, at least.

LOL THE PAINTING I FORGOT ABOUT IT.

Laura’s hair is really cute here.

Awwww, Billy gets mentioned!! I love Billy and I miss him a lot.

45 years in the military which just. Highlights the way the Caprica retcon makes absolutely no sense.

((as ‘one last time’ from Hamilton starts playing in my head… “after 45 years of my life/dedicated to its service with an upright zeal…”))

I forget what CBDR stands for, I know it came up at one point. I do not care enough to Google it but.

Lol did Bulldog also bring his own brain to the party.

Helo’s ‘huh?’ face is great.

Starbuck got her haircut evened out, I see.

Starbuck’s ‘wtf’ face is even greater.

41,421! Bulldog Immediately gets added to the count, I love it.

…they are actually still using the Cylon detector XD I guess at some point it got tweaked and put back into use? Or a different one got built, IDK. But yeah, that’s definitely a useful thing to know.

Lol, Cottle. “The conspiracy theorists are going to be disappointed.”

Okay, so Bulldog went missing three years ago, which means… if we add up the ~10 months of S1 + S2, plus the two timeskips, plus however long between the exodus and now, it’s been somewhere between two and two and a half years since the miniseries. So the Valkyrie mission has to have been between six months and a year, give or take, before the attack. Maybe a bit longer, to allow for rounding. And since Cylon infiltrator agents like Caprica and Boomer had already been in position for at least a year at that point…yeah, no, this stealth mission did not kick off anything, even before the Final Five reveal stuff Conclusively proves otherwise.

…now I want noodles.

((…I keep calling them ‘basestars,’ but I keep hearing ‘baseships.’ Did I…did I totally make up ‘basestar’ lol.))

“After a while I felt the institution no longer had anything to offer me, so I left.” Lol.

“Thought maybe the Cylons had beaten the bullshit attitude out of you.” LOL.

Ooooooh was he on the infected basestar??? Or did a second one get infected and also cut off? But then where did the pursuing raiders come from…?

Hi, Random Three! (oh man especially since this comes off the episode of a different D’Anna torturing Baltar…I wonder if they do most of it? I had assumed it was the Fours because doctors, but…)

Okay, yeah, it was about a year prior to the attacks, I did do the math right!

And of course the Taurons were causing issues; which given that Adama is ethnically Tauron…

Roslin is…about 85% sure this cover story is just that, I think. Especially when Bill says ‘there was no distress call, no sign of ejection, so I just left.’

So she asks Tory and Bulldog to leave, Tory will see if she can track down any family, and LOL THE LOOK SHE GIVES BILL. “So, you gonna tell me what really happened?” And he just says “you’ll have to trust me. It’s my mess, I’ll fix it.”

And this dream sooooort of supports that the Primary Three is Final Cut!Three instead of Downloaded!Three? Both being on Galactica and also I thiiiiink that’s the same yellow shirt? Except they can access each other’s memories in the datastream…

And the door says ‘end of line.’

I really love the super casual threesome reveal XD (way back when I wrote something about how D’Anna brings Caprica in for it; I found it on an external hard drive a while ago; I can post it somewhere if anyone actually wants to see it)

Hurray for the creepy eye socket and Tigh in his Dark Place still. But he actually is together enough to have this actual conversation with Bill when he comes in to tell him about Novacek. “So are you here to talk to your friend or your XO?” …well, closer than he was last time we saw him, at least, but maybe not fully there yet XD. “Last time I checked I was neither. Oh, yeah, I get it. This is gonna be a little complicated for you, Admiral. You gonna tell him what you did?” “I did what I had to do.” “So tell him.” “It’s not gonna make a difference. It’s in the past.” “You’re equivocating.” “I don’t know why the frak I came here.” [if I ever do actually do a soulmate AU, even though I’m mainly interested in how it would impact Caprica and Athena coming from Cylon culture ((since it would not be an ‘everyone has a soulmate’ AU)) …anyway, there are a Couple reasons why I’d write it out that Bill has two—Laura (romantic) and Saul (platonic) but just. I love the scenes the two of them have together.]

…still doing the thing with Ellen’s clothes, I see.

Saul not quite sure what to do with the hug, lol.

“Drink?” “You have no idea.” “Yes, I do.” …ow.

Ooooh, and that scene paralleled with Bill and Lee talking.

“He still does his share of ass-covering.” LOL.

Aaaaaand, yep, Saul is going to spill the beans but in fairness when he brought it up he thought Bill had told him. “…he didn’t tell you, did he. That son of a bitch.”

“I shot him down.” “If you did, you had your reasons. You were following orders, preventing something worse, right?” “No. I shot him down to avoid detection. Protect the mission. So it wouldn’t be discovered by the Cylons. The sole purpose was to ascertain the likelihood of a Cylon strike.”

Oh man Lee’s face as he’s putting all this together.

“You’re saying that…that we knew they were out there? That they could launch an attack on the Colonies?” “We didn’t know anything for sure. there were theories in some circles that the reason the Cylons had stayed dormant for so long was because they were building a war machine, preparing a strike.” “But I thought…I thought that no one had seen or heard from the Cylons in over 40 years.” “That’s true. …partially. The Admiralty had grown restless with the Adar administration. They thought we were resting on our laurels, unprepared to protect from an attack. My mission was to escort a recon ship just over the armistice line, gather evidence.” “And if the Cylons discovered you across the line…then they would see that as…” “An act of war.” Again, even at this point, the timeline adds up—maybe Bulldog’s mission sped things up, but preparation for the attack was already underway and had been for at least a year; we’ve known that since the miniseries, since Caprica and Gaius had explicitly been together for two years at that point.

“Don’t do this,” Tigh says in the flashback. “Think about it. You don’t want to do this.” “Do you have any idea what it will mean if he’s discovered?” And Bill gives the order to launch a ship-to-ship missile.

“The sooner you admit [that you know it’s true], the sooner you’ll get that haunted look out of your eyes. Sometimes surviving can be its own death sentence. I know that.” Saul. Ow. :((((((

“All those years, I told myself I didn’t know what they were. But I was just lying to myself. Pretending that it couldn’t be true. …it is true. I started it. Initiated it.”

Again. We already know the math doesn’t add up, and I think…I think if he weren’t in the moment of confronting his guilt and all the feelings Bulldog brought up, he would probably realize it, because Boomer had been under his command for two years, which means the Cylons were already sending their agents in at least that long ago. (Although…timeline conflict here; I thought she had only ever been on Galactica?)

And Lee is trying to absolve his guilt. “They put you there. You had no choice. You were one mission, you were one man. One man.” “It only takes one,” Bill says, which is true.

Awwwww, Caprica checking in with D’Anna, being a good girlfriend. “I think God’s trying to tell you something.” “It’s about Gaius, isn’t it?” “No, it’s not. It’s about something much bigger than that.”

Right, this is the part where D’Anna keeps setting herself up to download for Revelation purposes. And ordering the Centurion to forget.

OOOOOH FLASHES OF THE TEMPLE. …and these memory bits come from Downloaded so IDEK anymore.

I really do wonder what the resurrection goop is.

“There’s something beautiful, miraculous, between life and death.” And the other Three and the Six are. Concerned.

Starbuck is watching the footage of the dogfight and has Questions. “Why the hell do they keep missing?” Because, yeah, they’re missing by a fair margin.

Bulldog doing pushups again, sometimes on fists, sometimes on flat hands.

Oooh, and Kara brings her concerns to Saul! “Novacek was hit and smoking, flying straight and level. Any nugget could have made that shot. They let him escape.” “…Cylons don’t do anything by accident.” “Yeah, that’s what I was thinking, too.”

…Bulldog, if you choke him with the pipe, he’s not gonna be able to answer your questions…

“When I saw they left that door wide open for me…” “Is that what they did? Did they leave the door open for you? Did they let you escape?” “That’s not what I meant! That’s not the truth! I beat them! I beat them at their own game! I frakking killed her, and I escaped! You trying to take that away from me?!”

Goddamn Tigh is frickin badass at hand-to-hand I love it. Even with one eye and coming off an unknown length of time spent drunk and grieving.

“The truth hurts. But it’s better to know the truth than live a lie. We’re all soldiers. We’re all expendable. We did what we had to do to protect the mission. It’s ugly, but there it is. The Cylons let you go. The question is why? Ask yourself that, Danny. Because up until a minute ago you were doing exactly what they wanted you to do. You almost gave them what they wanted. Tell you a dirty little secret, the toughest part of getting played is losing your dignity, feeling like you are not worth the oxygen you are sucking down. You get used to it. You start to believe it. You start to love it. It’s like a bottle that never runs dry. You can keep reaching for it over and over and over again.” “So how do you put that bottle away, Saul?” “I don’t know. One day, you just decide to…get up and walk out of your room.”

…there’s a Whole Heck Of A Lot to unpack there holy shit. About. About a lot of people, about a lot of storylines. About Boomer, about Gaius, about Ellen, about…damn. Tigh says the coolest things no wonder he grows on me more and more with each rewatch.

((also I do find it interesting that, despite being a lieutenant (i.e., same rank as Kara and Helo and most of the other main military people except Lee were at the start of the series), Bulldog is on first-name terms with Bill and Saul in a way that pretty much no one else is.))

“Your resignation? You have got to be kidding me.” “I said before, we can’t hide from the things we’ve done. I see no other way around this situation. Maybe it’s time, Laura.” “Sit down, Bill. I think you’re being naïve.” “Naïve?” “Did it ever occur to you that the Admiralty may have set you up to provoke a war they wanted? It’s naïve to think that horrible things that we can’t understand have simple explanations, because simple explanations make us feel like we have control when we don’t. We know why the Cylons attacked us. And it wasn’t any one thing, oh my gods. We did a thousand things, good and bad, every day for 40 years to pave the way for those attacks.” AND ALSO THEY WERE DEMONSTRABLY ALREADY UNDERWAY FOR A YEAR BEFORE THE VALKYRIE MISSION. Even though they don’t know much/anything about Caprica’s mission, they do know that Boomer was in place for at least two years, discounting if she actually went to an Academy or all of her records there were backstopped, we don’t know. “Something has to be done.” And she still wants to give him the medal. “This was before I heard about this resignation of yours. So, hmm. I’d like to propose this. You seem hell-bent on paying some kind of penance for whatever it is you think you’ve done. So instead of resigning, why don’t you get up and walk out of here, meet me on the port deck tomorrow evening, and let me pin a frakking medal to your chest?” “I can’t.” “It’s not for you. It’s for them. Stand up there, acknowledge your fleet, and give them what they need: a hero. And that’ll be your penance. Even if it kills you.” She is very much not wrong and I love her.

I wonder who those three random civilians on the dais are.

Aww, Cottle sees him off and there. …may actually be a psychiatrist/psychologist/therapist in the fleet??? Given that Cottle is specifically sending him to a Dr. Stoffa and we’ve already confirmed that he’s physically okay. “It’ll take time,” he says. Which. Yep.

And Bill gives him back his uniform, and Bulldog tries to refuse, but. “Once a pilot, always a pilot.” “Yes, sir.” And they exchange another salute, this one much less Tense than at the beginning of the episode.

…I think they reordered these scenes, unless this is Supposed to be a flashback? Since Bill is in his blue uniform with Bulldog but in his dress greys for both the medal ceremony and the next scene in his quarters…I think reordered, since they don’t cut back to the medal ceremony which would’ve made more sense for a flashback.

Saul has an actual Eyepatch now, yay! The real sign his coming out of his dark place.

“I heard you won a medal.” “Yeah. They give ‘em out for anything these days. Good behavior, attendance, playing well with others…” And the LOOKS ON THEIR FACES. The way Saul won’t quite look at him, and the way Bill is looking at Saul, and…I love them. “I need you back in CIC. It’s just not the same without you there, intimidating the inmates.” “No, that’s not what I came here to talk to you about.” “Okay.”

…Saul has been keeping himself shaved while in his dark place.

“You want to tell me what happened to Ellen?” “…I could use a drink.” “Me, too.” I love these two and their relationship A Whole Lot.

Yeah, that was a Weird one, and there are some issues with continuity/etc., but I have to say I genuinely like it, for the Bill and Saul stuff. So, there it is. XD

Unfinished Business:

I have admittedly mixed feelings about this one XD Mostly because I have zero patience for the Quadrangle of Why subplot, and while it’s been around since at least mid-S2, this is where it really kicks in. But I really love the Bill and Laura flashbacks, and some of the other stuff is great.

And also I used As Long As You’re Mine for this episode on my S3 mix and I have never been prouder of a fanmix decision in my life XD

Lee gets the previously-on.

Still can’t take the moustache seriously, though.

First people in the ring are Lee and Helo!

Okay but that flashback location looks like it would have all the same problems as sex on the beach. Namely sand/dirt in places where you really don’t want it.

Lol Helo’s little ‘come at me’ gesture.

Dee is super pretty and deserved so much better.

And even if their relationship is in a weird place, Kara is still inviting Sam over for sex. “That was exactly what I needed.” “Glad to be of service.” And he’s going along with it, but.

((because this is the point where it’s Apropos: https://textsfrombsg.tumblr.com/post/7085786879/derevko-not-even-kidding-i-bet-this-is-what …and also possibly this one: https://textsfrombsg.tumblr.com/post/18017419131/derevko-kara-can-be-pretty-blunt-in-her-texts ))

…Sam also deserved better.

Ah, he decides to hold her bra hostage so they can try to have a Feelings conversation. “I want our marriage back.” “And what if I’m not ready for that?” “I don’t know. Maybe you’ll never be. Maybe because I’m not what you really want after all.”

Yeah, Kara, don’t…don’t hide from your feelings with one man by running to another. ((which is why her having Angry Sex with Kat doesn’t hit the same buttons because that’s a very different relationship dynamic.))

AW YAY FIGHTING AGATHONS IS AN ACTUAL CANONICAL NICKNAME

“He’s a tough little frakker, I’ll give him that.” I love you so much Helo.

Oh, good, they straight-up establish that Cottle’s observing.

Ugh did we Have to bring back the fatphobic jokes again WHY I thought we were DONE with that bullshit.

And Cottle is the one who says ‘nope, Lee is done here.’ And Lee is Not Thrilled at him.

“I’m done, Kara.” “I’m not.” Aaaaaand Dee watching from afar and. Sigh.

“Now who’s biting off more than they can chew, Captain?” “Not me from where I’m standing, Major.” And yeah that was a very. Charged. kiss-or-kill distance moment.

41,422! I guess someone had a baby since last episode??

Okay, flashback to 17 months ago, which is 8 months before the occupation, so 4 months after the initial settlement, give or take. Which means…this episode takes place 5 months after the exodus, give or take a couple of weeks for the actual plot of those four episodes.

“Awww, that’s such a load of crap.” “There’s an open bar!”

I love that outfit on Laura.

“I do not gaze at—” sorry wrong fandom XD and a very different dynamic but the way he looks at her there XD

Aww, her dad was a fight fan!

“Did you throw your tags in there?” “I wish. All the frustrations that I have--” lol the way he cuts off there.

Is Gaeta managing the bookmaking XD

I love Kara’s Challenge smirk.

And yeaaaah of course Starbuck wiped the floor with Hotdog.

XDXD Gotta love a noodle incident. “So then they come back to the locker room with the same set of handcuffs and two straws!”

Awwww, Saul looks so happy in the flashbacks, and I love this little bit with him and Ellen.

“Did I ever tell you how happy I am I married you?” “Not once.” “Then I’ll save it for a special occasion.”

And Gaeta is so happy to talk Infrastructure but then he has to go talk to the finance minister and I love him, he’s so cute. “Oh, my gods, I didn’t think he’d ever leave” LOL LAURA. The one thing she doesn’t miss about the presidency is having to listen to stuff like that XD And then Bill says he’s a good kid and I love all of them so much.

Yes that was a Very Transparent invitation Laura was giving you, Bill XD

And Bill is starting to spot some Discipline Issues he needs to fix in the present.

And awwwww, him and Chief having a drink 18 months ago because Cally is pregnant. “First boy born on Galactica.” I love them a lot. Except Cally doesn’t want him born on the ship. “And neither do I. not if he can grow up breathing fresh air.” And Bill initially refuses to let him.

YES KAT KICK HER ASS I HAVE NO IDEA WHO SHE IS BUT I LOVE YOU AND ALSO I REMEMBER WHAT THE NEXT EPISODE IS I’M GONNA CRY.

And Bill is making a point of putting his tags in. “Chief! Get your fat, lazy ass up here.”

And Helo wrapping his hands. “Make ‘em tight.” “Yes, sir.”

…hey was that Zarek in the crowd? Probably not, Richard Hatch is too expensive/important for a two-second cameo but it kinda looked like him XD

And Bill gets off one heck of a punch as soon as the bell rings and everyone’s like OOOOOOOOOOH

“Get up, Chief. We’re just getting started.”

And Chief in the past is trying to put the best face on it. “There’s doctors, sickbay, medicine…” And Cally is trying to look on the bright side, too. And that little kiss, poor babies.

((yeah they totally had sex in that hammock))

“Maybe we should just enjoy this.” “I am.” MY HEART.

“This how you fight your enemies, Chief? How you fight for your life? No excuses. Show me you’re a soldier.” And the look on Chief’s face, omg.

“Is that what you want? Is that what you want, Admiral?”

Aaaaand Kara using this as an excuse to needle Lee.

“You literally drank Anders under the table.” Lol.

I do love all the random couples slowdancing in the background while Lee and Kara are having that conversation.

And Cottle wants Bill to tap out but he refuses and I LOVE LAURA HERE OKAY. “He’s swinging wild, so hit him with a left hook” I LOVE HER SO MUCH YOU GUYS

“You wanna win?” “I’m not gonna win.” Yeah, that’s not the point he’s making here.

And then the next morning Bill changes his mind and lets Chief and Cally muster out. “I’m gonna miss you, Chief. I wanna wish you good luck.” And this music in the background and the look on his face when he smiles and Cally’s FACE. And “I want you guys to have at least a dozen.” “We’ll see about that” and she kisses his cheek and MY HEART.

And the way the same music continues as they go back to the fight scene where Chief is pounding the crap out of Bill.

And then it goes very quiet because he has his Verbal point to make. “When you stand on this deck, you be ready to fight, or you dishonor the reason why we’re here. Now remember this: when you fight a man, he’s not your friend. Same goes when you lead men. I forgot that once. I let you get too close, all of you. I dropped my guard. I gave some of you breaks, let some of you go, before the fight was really over. I let this crew and this family disband. And we paid the price in lives. That can’t happen again.”

And the way Laura takes his arm to help him down awwwwww.

And Tigh says it’s over. “So, what, you’re just gonna call it?” Kara says, because she hasn’t fought Lee yet, which is what she really wants to do.

“It’s over, Kara.” “So, what? You have the guts to try and frak another man’s woman, but not to fight one? I wonder if Dee knew what she was getting. Think she would’ve settled for sloppy seconds?” And he hits her. “Truth stings, don’t it?” “You want a fight, Captain? You’ve got it.”

I really do love her Fight Me smile.

And she took off her tanktop for this one, she didn’t with Hotdog.

And Dee comes in and. The look on her face. Poor Dee. She deserved so much better than this bullshit. (like, yeah, she’s not…it is kind of hard to forget the way she handled ending things with Billy but that doesn’t make the way Lee and Kara screw with her and Sam at all okay.)

“I’m not getting married.” “Then what’s the point, Kara? You love him, right?” “Where are we going with this, Lee?” “That’s the question, isn’t it. Where are we going?” ugh, I’m already exhausted. “Is this how you want to spend [the rest of your life]? Is this who you wanna spend it with?”

And Sam shows up to the dance and finds Dee. “What’s going on?” “What does it look like?” “Looks like they’re trying to kill each other.” “That’s one perspective.”

Again, I feel like fucking in this dirt is a Poor Life Choice. …I mean, not just for all the Relationship Drama reasons, I mean because dirt/sand in Uncomfortable Places. I guess they did at least Try to layer their jackets/etc. on the ground to prevent that but Still.

“Well that makes things more complicated.” “Yeah.” “What are we gonna do?” “What are we gonna do? We accept it. Tomorrow, I tell Dee, you tell Sam.” “Just like that?” “Just like that.” And right after Dee transferred to Pegasus to be with him. “Yeah, we tell them how we feel. We shout it to the skies. What, you don’t think I will?”

This shouting to the sky bit is so dumb in all the best ways and would be Super Adorable if it weren’t for the entire Quadrangle of Why that comes from it.

Also how drunk are you two right now I assume Very.

Aww, Helo cheering Starbuck on.

…you know, Kat is another person who almost never gets called by her actual name? Always her callsign. I don’t know if anyone ever says Louanne out loud.

Aaaaand now it’s going in an MMA direction which is probably against the rules but Kara and Lee are beyond caring at this point, Cottle’s gone, Saul may be, too…

“You look like you had a good time.” LOL.

“It’s been a hell of a morning. You missed all the excitement.” “Problems upstairs?” “No, good things. Kara got married.” “…what?” “Yeah, about an hour ago. Found herself a priest, went down by the river, and got married. …you okay?”

Yeah, Kara, it’s…really not cool to run from your feelings with Sam by going to Lee and run from your feelings with Lee by going to Sam.

“She deserves it. We all deserve to be happy. I gave her permission to muster out, along with Chief and Cally, a few of the others. So it’ll be up to us to make sure there’s no mass exodus.”

…I think this is the same music (or very similar) as what was playing in the Opera House vision with Baltar and Head!Six on Kobol?

Anyway Lee is not listening and…yeah, his face as he goes to meet Sam and Kara.

And Sam is just Elated and missing the other Drama because he just got married!!!!!

“No, it was crazy, she comes down, she wakes me up, she pops the question, drags me down to the priest, and bang, like that, we’re married!” “So it was your idea.” “Yeah. It was my idea.” “…do you guys want a minute to, you know, talk?” And Lee just tells him congratulations and good luck before walking off with a “you’re gonna need it” parting shot. …and going to make out with Dee.

((at least this time, unlike at the end of S1 when he was being an UTTER ASS, he kind of has room/reason to be pissed at her.))

Oh, Sam and Dee in the crowd, watching as Lee and Kara’s fight winds down. They’re both wobbling, but they won’t quit.

And they wind up hugging, and Sam has to look away briefly, and Dee just keeps watching, with this blank but devastated expression. And I just. Those two deserved so much better.

…yeah, I guess my final thoughts on this episode are I really love everything about Bill’s half!

The Passage:

Aaaaaand now I’m gonna cry.

Either Starbuck or Kat for the previously-on, I think.

Ah, yes, the flashback to the JUST HAVE ANGRY SEX episode aka Scar.

…do we ever see any of the male models download? I think we see Ellen later, and I know we’ve seen Sixes and Eights and now Threes…

Aaaand the food processing is contaminated, but Sharon is looking for a route to the planet where they can harvest algae. 7-10 days on current rations if it doesn’t work and oh my god Helo trying to stay Calm and Professional but he’s so worried about whether or not Sharon will make it back through the radiation okay especially since she’s late back and my heaaaaaart.

“I gave it to Cottle.” “Right, after I gave him head.” Lol.

The pilots divvying up crumbs, man.

41,420 again! So…two people died since the last episode, I guess?

Also this vaguely unsettling and largely repetitive piano music for the Basestar stuff. And D’anna quietly moves Gaius’s hand, lol. But he wakes up, she tells him not to wake up Caprica, and that she has things to do. “I’ll never understand what you all do all day long. Where do you suppose she takes herself off to, then?” “You’re not the only one asking that.” “I’m not?” “She’s been doing things.” “…doing things?” But Caprica falls back asleep before answering him.

Awwww, Helo hovering. And Athena’s nose is bleeding, as she goes into decontamination.

And Helo just takes her hands ‘are you okay’ and she gives him a quick nod before reporting to Bill and Lee. “She’s a Cylon, she can handle a radiation dose that big.” “We think!” Helo snaps.

“Nausea from the radiation exposure will take care of our appetites.”

“We’re all flying solo on this mission, so there’ll be no one to bitch slap you if you start to drift or start seeing little toasters on your ass.” Lol, Kara.

Aaaand that’s how Kat (or Sacha) gets caught; one of her friends from her old life catches her. “My name isn’t Sacha. It’s Captain Louanne Katraine. Sacha and you were a long time ago.” Awww, yay, she got promoted! Probably when she was CAG earlier but she didn’t get demoted back again which I appreciate.

Back to the basestar “could you believe I’m lost again” lol Gaius. “If I spoke to the relevant Simon, would I actually find out you were at this meeting?” “Who would tell you anything about my business?” “So, it’s true?” “Caprica?” and he quickly shifts to put her on the defensive in a different direction. “Did you know you have some dried goo in your hair?”

“Do you have any idea what you are accusing me of?” “Yes. Intentionally killing yourself over and over so you can download over and over. But death’s just a revolving door, isn’t it?”

Aaaaaand of course her ex is blackmailing her.

“Since when is it a crime to take care of your own? Remember, I know who you are. I know how to make you happy.” And he goes in for sex, and she rebuffs him.

And all those shots from the top of the stairs…was that to indicate Kara or someone else was listening in?

YAY TIGH IS BACK AS XO!!!

Or he’s hovering outside the door, working himself up to coming in and aww Bill’s little smile.

Felix and Dee are like “don’t make it weird don’t make it weird don’t make it weird” and then people start applauding and my heaaaaaaaaaart.

“Enough! Don’t you people have jobs to do?!” And Bill and Gaeta are the ones not making it a Thing. Bill just quietly says “welcome back”

Tigh looking at the sigil/symbol on the wall <3333333

Helo trying to talk Hotdog through “ease up on the throttle, this is not a viper.”

Aaaaaaand they lost one ship on this first jump through. :((((((

Aaaaand Kat’s patch is black. But she found her ship that she thought she’d lost!

Or maybe not.

Her face when she comes out of the decon shower oh man. :(((((

And Hotdog pukes on the deck. Not for the first time.

She looks around at the other pilots, many of whom are. Not Doing Okay. Helo’s doing better than most, at least. Which is why she picks his patch to steal, probably.

“We gotta get better at tracking our sheep. Racetrack, don’t call out coordinates to the wrong ship.”

And Kara watches Kat go, but helps up one of the others first.

100 marines down, 200 close to it, civilians causing Problems on the other side…

“I heard they were eating paper. Is that true?” “No. Paper shortage.” And they both start laughing because what else can you do at this point.

Oh, this is where Starbuck sees Kat and her ex, because he’s still hanging around, and she’s checking out one of the raptors and sees them arguing on the catwalk.

“So, when you resurrect, you see the faces of the final five Cylons? The ones that no one’s seen.” “Why do you want to know about them?” “I could be a Cylon. I would stop being a traitor to one set of people, and be a hero to another. And have a place to belong. You would help me understand my destiny. Have you seen my face?” “Your face? I can’t remember.” And she’s been trying to draw while it’s still fresh on her mind, but nothing much comes out. “Cylons, humans…we’re all just trying to discover who we are, aren’t we?”

Aaaand Kat’s ex flirting with random girls, and Starbuck approaches him, calling him by name. and then she goes to confront Kat.

“I took the name Louanne Katraine from a girl who died two days before the attack on Caprica. Got me through the background checks.” “Yeah. Times were rough. Keep going.” “I was a drug runner. Enzo was my supplier. What do you want? We were truckers, okay? We just moved stuff.” “People. You see, some think that that’s the way the Cylons infiltrated Caprica. They seeded themselves in the outer colonies and then used criminals to get them into the capital. Anyone who’s found guilty of helping the Cylons is considered a traitor.” “We didn’t carry Cylons.” “How do you know?” “Because nobody knew they looked like us!” “Then how do you know you didn’t?!” and then the way Starbuck leans in. “You think I’m a traitor. You think I’m a traitor?” “No. I don’t think you’re a traitor. You’re a smart young woman. That’s what the old man said. You’re just not smart enough to accept who you are. You see, you lied your way into the company of good people.” And they’re at kiss-or-kill distance and Kat is crying and begs her not to tell Bill. “Please don’t, or I—” “Or what?” “Please just let me tell him myself. Please, just let me. Can you do that?” and Starbuck is…the way she looks at her then. And then she just says ‘gods’ half under her breath and walks away.

And D’Anna and Gaius are going back to the Hybrid.

“This is where you got the idea to start…intentionally downloading? …let’s see what we can find out.” And he approaches the tank, kneels next to her, and rolls up his sleeve. “What do you think you’re doing?” And he closes his eyes and visibly braces himself, slowly lowering his hand into the tank. “Don’t touch it!” but then the Hybrid grabs his arm and looks directly at him which is New. And the Terror on his face omg. “Intelligence. A mind that burns like a fire.” “…yes, I’m here.” “Find the hand that lies in the shadow of the light. In the eye of the husband of the eye of the cow.” And he pulls back and he seems like he’s in pain, and her head returns to its regular orientation. “Are you all right?” D’Anna asks. “It just speaks nonsense, right?” “…I don’t think anything it says is nonsense. The husband of the eye, the eye of the…Hera. Hera, sometimes referred to as cow-eyed Hera. And the husband of Hera…” “is Jupiter. The Eye of Jupiter. It’s written about in the ancient texts. My god…could there be a connection between their gods and ours? What does it mean?” “It’s a location. A planet, hidden in the shadow of light, probably a cluster of stars…that’ll lead us to the Eye of Jupiter, and to the hand hidden in the shadow of light.” As he stares at his hand, and his logic brain keeps going. “Probably some kind of artifact. As in five. Five faces. Now all we have to do is find the right planet.” And he drags his sleeve back down so slowly.

Kat studying her reflection in the mirror, struggling to decide what to do. She finds her hair is falling out. Checks her patch, thinks, remembers “accept who you are.” Goes to see Enzo. “Thieving bastard. You’re going to cost me everything I’ve got.” And then she has sex with him, and running her hand along the raptor, and…yep, breaks into Helo’s locker to steal his patch.

God she looks like hell. Poor Kat.

Oh noooo she lost her last ship too…

And they have to jump, but she refuses to lose another one, so she stays to look for Faru Sadin, even though her patch was already black and—oooh, algae planet has Rings!

…huh, I guess either of the two seats in the front of a raptor can be used by the pilot? Because some of the pilots seem to be on the right and some on the left.

And her stolen patch is black now, too, and. And and and.

Aww, Saul. “Come on, Kat (or possibly kid?). Come on home.”

And that calm look on her face as she spots Faru Sadin and then she brings them home my heart.

“Galactica, Kat. Mission accomplished.” And her face. And. And I know what’s coming. And. :(((((((((

And Helo starts a round of applause for her and and and and she’s barely standing as she comes out of her raptor, but she puts her arms up for Victory and takes off her helmet and reaches up to take off her helmet and then Lee realizes and glances to the side and then she collapses and.

MY HEART. “I don’t think we should end the way we ended.” “Listen. Everybody is stuck with the things they’re not proud of. That, uh, that thing about good people, I…I didn’t mean that.” “Yeah, I know.” And Starbuck gives her sleeping pills. “Enough,” she says. “Take ‘em if you want.” BAWLING. “Thank you.” “…Igottago.”

And the way Bill puts his hand on her shoulder as she flees and goooooooooood.

“Admiral, I…I’m so sorry.” “I’m not here to lecture. I’m letting you know about a promotion. I’m making you CAG again.” “…sir, you know I’m not getting out of here, right?” “You earned it. What you did was harder than facing a bullet. And you did it without putting one other soul in harm’s way. Don’t know if I could’ve done that. I wish there was something more that I could give you.” “No. it’s good. I’d like to be CAG very much. Thank you. …sir, there…there’s a thing. A reason why you might not want to do this. Kara knows what it is, but I wanted to tell you myself.” “I don’t need to know anything other than what I already know. When you were CAG, you protected your people. Made them feel safe enough to be brave. What you were gonna say, does it change that?” and he goes to get a chair to sit with her and BAWL. ING. “Are you…you staying?” “Oh, I’m staying. I love this sickbay, in a way. Reminds me of where my son Zak was born. Carolanne was so happy. She was convinced both times that she was having a girl. So it was a surprise at the end.” “Did you want a girl, too?” “Yeah. Three’s a good round number.” GODDDDDDDDD MY HEART I CAN’T TAKE IT. And then he changes the board and ;____________;

AND THERE’S A BIT OF WANDER MY FRIENDS IN ALL STRINGS AS THE OTHER PILOTS WATCH HIM DO IT AND FUCCCCCCCCCCCCK

And Kara puts her on the memorial wall.

God fucking damn it that episode. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

#bsg #battlestar galactica #the great bsg rewatch of 2022 #i love everyone in this bar

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helpicant-stop · 2 years

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all of the ask emojis for c!hannah <3

omfg 😭 well alright strap in i guess

[send me character headcanon asks!]

🏳️‍🌈: sapphic aro (qpr ctinarose supremacy 🙏🙏)

🏳️‍⚧️: she's a #girl but like with a little extra flavour. spicy cisgender if you will (ie she uses nature-related neopronouns because she thinks they add to the aesthetic)

😇: standard twitch prime practitioner like most on the server, but she has more faith in the inherent laws of nature and fairy magic. also the egg but that was like a year ago people change man🙄 /j

🧸: in her early childhood she lived mostly in the forest with other fairies, but started spending most of her time in hypixel during her teenage years

👻: i don't think channah's outright afraid of many things (that she'd admit), but i also think she was scared of the egg returning after she finally broke free of the "possession" thing; it's an unexplained vaguely divine entity that goes againsf the laws of nature and makes everything around it rot and change colour, of course it'd be a bit intimidating

🎶: channah likes metal but like not the screamy kind like the operatic rock ballad kind, and she almost exclusively listens to women artists. also she's a big fan of 90s riot grrl

👽: carries a bag of rose seeds/sprouts wherever she goes, not just for personal strength and aesthetics but because rapidly growing rosevines make great distractions in a fight

💤: i think pre-egg she'd have mostly scent/touch/sound related dreams that are mostly just sensations or vague events, and sleep really soundly. during the eggpire she'd go days without sleep before dropping randomly and waking up hours later in another location. i think the only dreams she'd have then would be quiet whispering or distant shouts she couldn't quite hear properly. post-egg she can't quite fall asleep or wake up as easily anymore, and she doesn't even remember if she has dreams or not

🦾: blind with roses where her eyes should be, because nature fairies don't need eyes unless the thing they represent does. when she moved to the dream smp, an eye sprouted out of one of the flower petals and gave her sight on one side (because the laws of nature or something were different there bitch idk). it doesn't feel natural (?) and is prone to random phantom pains/sensations and honestly isn't that useful so she'd rather be without it.

during the egg, vines and leaves grew through her and replaced the flowers in her eyes with those little glowing red sprouts. i actually made an art about this (*cough cough* @yesican-stop *cough cough*)

💝: acts of service but as in she will be your number 1 apologist and defender and take you places. i also think she's very on gift giving and enjoys gifting flowers and pets (the latter only to people she think can take care of them)

🫂: i think she's extremely loyal to her friends which i think makes the red banquet betrayal such a Thing™ because like. you know she's far gone

💔: insert "hehehe yes... yes!!!!" sickos comic panel here. when she was infected, one of her biggest guilts was going against cpuffy, but she couldnt really ruminate or reflect on that at all because the egg would always cover up her thoughts with its own, and even after they made up they were never quite the same afterwards. ahaha fboy face emoji

🪢: she has no recalled family except for nature, her friends and tina, which to her is better than any related associations she could hypothetically have

📓: bit of projection here but i think she'd have several phases of learning several different fighting styles/martial arts and gettign moderately good at all of them before developing her own unique style. aside from that (projection 2 electric boogaloo) she also seems like the type to sculpt or sew or make dioramas or just create art in general, and i think a lot of it would be really emotional theme-wise tbh. also she organises all her stuff by colour and helps tina farm fungi at kinoko

👗: she'd definitely love to mix style with practicality, like i think she'd have miniskirts with shorts sewn on underneath so she could fight, and blouses that can be tied back with buttons so she can get her hands dirty. one thing that is not practical at all are her reproduction white 1960s gogo boots. nobody questions the reproduction white 1960s gogo boots.

she is also a big fan of natural tones but FUCKING HATES FLOWER PRINT because it's not even close to the real thing at ALL. she used to wear a lot of bright rose red, but the egg kind of spoiled that for her, so now all the red she wears is dark or muted. also all her outfits would be self made, 100% biodegradable and sustainable and usually have living plants integrated within the outfits

🔪: come on. you already know this one. channah pvp queen girlboss etc. ok but in all seriousness i think her fighting style would be very swift and graceful, and she'd talk a lot during fights, whether to herself or the opponent/s. during emotional fights especially she gets surprisingly better rather than slipping up. one of her mottos is "use words, until that doesn't work, then use violence"

🌟: i think prior to the smp most of her goals would be very short-term/impulsive/quick-passing without really thinking of the future or consequences. but now ?? dude she just wants to be happy and live a nice fun life with all her friends and probably do nature activism on the side. why is the dream smp so trauma girl /: girlphobic if you will ,,oh wait that's just misogyny isn't it 💀

🥇: at heart she's just a rose fairy and that's what she's best at. she can cultivate rosebushes so cool looking the gardeners at the queen of hearts' castle would CRY

🍫: she doesn't like sweets that much but would KILL for a well-made steak like srsly it's so hard to find nowadays everyone either overcooks the outside and undercooks the inside or overcooks the whole thing or adds bad seasoning but come on how hard can it be. she eats at mcpuffy's (but begrudgingly) because it's cheap and moderately average but las nevadas has better food, they're just too overpriced for her taste and she partially works there anyway so why would she need to in the first place

🎭: totally a casual liar, but she doesn't lie about anything severe *when she can*. but yeah she would tell a child that santa is real without flinching or tell someone she's working on the thing they asked her to work on when she's not

❤️‍🔥: she's aro and #Not Interested moving on (however if i ignore this and make it about qprs then she's totally super sappy with tina and more giggly around her than like bad or sam)

💄: she's made of soil and plants and roses grow out of and around her arms like climbing vines. also she wears makeup that she grinds out of plant dye and charcoal

🖕 (funnieat emoji choice ever btw): she gets more irritated than angry, but when she does get angry she Gets Angry™. she's the type of guy to utilise insults and threats really effectively before even fighting

😺: she's a "dog person" but is a fan of most animals anyway. her favourite amphibian is either an axolotl or salamander; her favourite reptile is snakes but specifically like the small 5-6 ft ones that can curl around your arms, and she prefers their natural morphs rather than the eye-catching artificially selected ones and can you tell i know way more about snakes than any other animal yet; her favourite bird is the lovebird because she likes their call and also thinks the fact that they come in pairs is adorable; her favourite mammal would probably be dogs or capybaras; her favourite fish would be a parrotfish and tbh idek why she just seems like she would and i don't know shit about fish; and her favourite invertebrate would be butterflies or any insect that disguises itself as another animal because she loves the ingenuity and the naturally formed patterns

😬: i think her betrayal and murder really hangs over her head, but she doesn't like being reminded about it (and anyway she considers it fine since she was literally possessed and couldn't do anything about it) so she chastises the people who do bring it up

😭: i think the inciting incident/first few weeks of the infection were the most hard-hitting because she'd feel physically bad all the time with seemingly no source and hallucinate sounds that didn't exist and get terrible intrusive thoughts. i think once it really started growing and getting a hold of her she just started getting numb to it

😶: she once ate a butterfly on accident and felt incredibly bad about it. also i think her wings had rose patterns on them like stained glass

#HOPE YOURE HAPPY /lh #asks!!#wren🧚#chitter

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bisluthq · 2 months

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There are articles on Louis Tomlinson and One Direction, and once again Louis is speaking out about Larry not being real, but he is helpless in saying anything that changes people’s mind. It’s nothing he can do about it. I think it’s frustration on Sean’s part that rumors persist too. I think most Gaylors think Taylor would just come out and deny it, and the reason she doesn’t, is proof she is. I think she did try but the rumors got worse and saying anything more would make her sound homophobic. That is a fear in Hollywood, I believe…being perceived as homophobic. Hiddles seemed to get irritated when asked about it, and flat out denied his rumors. There are plenty of gay and bi people in Hollywood, but the conspiracists seem to focus harder on people that really hasn’t shown any proof they are gay.

Taylor did come out and deny it lol. She denied it to fucking CNN. They covered Taylor being straight alongside wars and shit. But yeah conspiracists don’t give a shit.

look, a bit of speculation is natural and normal and sometimes is yk very true lol. People do come out and/or admit rumors were correct sometimes. Rumors about wild behavior are always fun. People do have fun with one another and artsy people do on the whole tend to be kinda wild and free spirited so like heterosexual truthering to the point of “NO I KNOW FOR A FACT THIS PERSON HAS NEVER EVEN KISSED A PERSON OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER” is just… not it for me lol. I mean I met old (in length of friendship not age per se) friends of my bf’s the other day that he’s had from Cali/HW (all are film people) and those two friends are married now but when my bf met HER (she’s his friend, he met him through her) she was married to some other guy. Fun story about how those two met: her now hubby has a tongue ring and one night apparently everyone was asking him what it’s like to hook up with a guy with a tongue ring so he set up a kissing line and HER THEN HUSBAND was in the line directly in front of her and made out with him first, after which she did. Her husband and her then split for completely unrelated reasons (my bf had known him and he was apparently a bit of a prick), this guy and her were working a crew job together, got drunk and hooked up and… the rest is history lmao. She finds it hilarious her ex husband made out with her now husband first. Now I don’t think that’s an especially straight story but I’m 90% sure everyone (except tongue ring guy who’s a bit of a wildcard on that kinda thing) in it identifies as straight. People also have flings and shit idk on both sides of the equation - a VERY lesbian friend of mine (the girl who was a bit too masc for me personally when we went on a few dates and we were both just not fully feeling it romantically but we’ve stayed pretty good friends - we actually were very close straight after the failed attempt at dating but then she moved to Colorado so it’s not super easy to talk time zone wise but we do text regularly) recently got drunk and hooked up with her male roommate lol. Shit happens. None of that’s identity related or like necessarily that deep and we should normalize saying like idk people do stuff sometimes lol and it’s fun and normal and we shouldn’t try box everything neatly.

conspiracies on the other hand rot ur brains 🤷🏻‍♀️ and all these gay truthering things are literally that - not rumors, just full on conspiracies and often kinda homophobic at their core because it comes down to like “a straight person wouldn’t do that” and like??? WTF lol. Wtaf.

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call-jupiter · 1 year

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committing myself to attempting a chapter in the form of a true-crime doc for The Sycamore Tree lmfao should be fun but we’ll have to see how it goes. I like challenging myself and trying my hand at a variety of writing styles and this fic being my first rookie fic AND being as long and as… involved… as it is makes it a good sandbox for some experimentation. might scrap it if it pisses me off but the attempt will be made. I already know exactly what ground it’s gonna cover and everything so I’m looking forward to putting those chapters in proper writing (not just an outline) so I can really get to work on this one knowing fully how the relevant chapters before it panned out. it’s planned and all but I need to actually finish the chapters first bc I’m not… always great at following my own outlines. lol.

since I’ve been trying to flesh it out with subplots and side action and new characters and bottle chapters and things my outline has come out feeling structured very much like a season of television. so I thought it’d be cool to try and take one of the show’s unique episode formats and incorporate it in. turning Sycamore into something of like a… what-if for s5 on the whole rather than just a canon divergence that happens to start in s5? like I want it to be Large Scale. if my readers and I are committing to 40 chapters that range from 7-10k words each, I might as well use that space to its full potential.

I’m rambling. but what y’all are gonna learn about me the more and more active I get in the fanfic scene for this show is that there’s nothing I love more than using my socmed platforms to pontificate my little fic ideas instead of making private notes. do it on my twt all the time for bbc merlin bc that’s the place I promo those works. tumblr’s become a bit of a home base for my rookie content (which is just Sycamore rn but hopefully more in the future since I’m enjoying creating this one so much). that means these random little musings about potential fics or directions for those wips are mostly gonna land here. feel free to ignore them. or, hell, if I post some off-hand concept that you like go ahead and lift it for your own works. I think that’s why I like making notes this way tbh bc then if an idea is dead-on-arrival for me it could theoretically find life in the hands of another writer who came across it. like paying it forward or whatever but in fic prompts. inspiring myself and hopefully other writers in the process—since I know coming up w an idea is half the battle. might be a bit presumptuous but it’s like if I do it this way maybe I can make that part a bit easier on my future self or on someone else. idk.

anyway. love y’all a lot. like a lot a lot. the support is still mind-blowing to me. I don’t think I’ll ever quite wrap my head around it. very surreal. so hopefully you can bear w me and my aimless posts like this and my writing experiments that may or may not succeed. I’m so proud of this work so far but it’s such new territory for me and it really feels like it’s asking a lot of the audience to stick w it since it’s… so much. like I want the diversions from the main arc to feel natural and engaging. it’s difficult tho bc I’m not a professional or whatever. I’m not even someone w an english/writing/literature background or something. I’m just a pharmacology student writing some silly little fanfiction in my spare time.

what I mean to say is that I’m trying my damnedest to make it worth your time to read it all. even the parts that aren’t chenford or aren’t connected to the main plot. like they’re there bc I feel like it adds to the experience not bc I’m trying to pad the length. and ik that in my mind but sometimes I see the current word count or my projections for the final word count based on the average of the finished chapters and I question how it comes off. like I worry a bit that adding stuff like that could seem superfluous even tho it’s not my intention. I don’t want Sycamore to be long for the sake of being long. I want it to be long so it can feel like a whole universe. like a highly fictionalized thing still grounded somewhat in reality. not just a one-track story to get characters straight from point A to point B. you know?

idk what I’m saying anymore but. it all makes sense in my head. I just have so many thoughts about this work and I’m also just so excited to write it and publish it and let you see it but it’s very slow-going bc I want it to be as good as possible.

anyway. weird little draft note thing over. there was a point to this somewhere but I definitely lost it midway. lmfao. this is what happens when I forget to take my adhd meds and can’t focus enough to actually write but still want to feel like I’m making progress. whoops.

#the sycamore tree #fanfic #ao3 writer #the rookie

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sundaysundaes · 4 years

Text

Our First Time

Mark Lee X Reader, ft. Johnny | Smut, Fluff | 4.6k | College AU

Summary: Considering your boyfriend never dares to take the initiative to go further than your usual make-out sessions, you have to do the part to actually be in charge of the relationship.

Warnings: Smut, unprotected sex, Mark Lee losing his virginity while being extremely awkward and utterly cute about it, oral sex, fingering, failed fluff (idk man this is just basically me being a thirsty hoe over morkly)

“Remember the suit you wore when we went to your aunt’s wedding?”

Your boyfriend, who has been together with you for almost a year by now, hums in response, not really giving you any glance as he’s busy tapping his pen to his lips, thinking about writing the next lyric for the song he’s composing. Mark Lee has his chest pressed against his acoustic guitar, his hair’s a bit messy and slightly parted to the side, showing his forehead. Considering how close he’s sitting on the floor next to you, you can tell how half of the collar of his washed-out denim jacket stands up, brushing against the end of his dark hair.

“Yeah, what about it?” He continues asking when he notices that you’re waiting for a proper answer. He slips his guitar pick back between his fingers and tries a few chords to match his lyrics.

“I just dreamt about you fucking me from behind while wearing that suit.”

Mark strums his guitar too hard out of shock, making his instrument flies away from his lap, hitting the marbled floor with a sudden loud noise.

“What?”

Still having your head pressed against the table with your right cheek glued to your abandoned college papers, you flatly repeat, “I dreamt about you fucking—”

Mark stands up so fast, you can tell he’s having a slight headache because of it. “No. No. I heard what you said, I just—” It’s a fact that Mark blushes rather easily, but he has never blushed this hard before. “What—why—telling me so suddenly like this—you’re—”

“Mark, you’re rambling.”

“Why are you so calm about it?!” He walks away to pick up his guitar, unconsciously stomping a little bit like a fuming child as he does so. “And why are you lazing around like that? Didn’t you have some assignments to do?”

You finally straighten yourself up, looking at the textbooks you need to read and suddenly feeling like you’re dyslexic from birth. “I dozed off a bit, I guess. I just woke up from that dream where—”

“OKAAAAYYYYY!” Mark scrambles back to your side, crossing his legs and shushing you down by covering your head with your hood until you can barely see anything. The grey hoodie you’re wearing—his hoodie, actually—is already oversized when Mark is wearing it, so it’s basically a dress when you’re wearing it and the hood is big enough to cover your entire head.

You pull your hood away, your hair looking like a mess and by then Mark still has his cheeks rosy from your words and you wonder, whether it really was too much to talk about with your boyfriend?

You have never been the one who gets easily embarrassed about sexual stuff—or about anything really, because you’re a pretty blunt person. It’s his job to get embarrassed about things—even the ones that came out from his own mouth. Mark can be so confident and so awkward at the same time that it doesn’t make sense but you find him to be cute that way.

“Mark.”

“If you’re going to talk about that dream again, I am going to yank my hair out of my head.”

“But—“

“And I’m going to yank your hair out of your head.”

“But then we’re both be bald.”

“That will be your fault.”

You huff, unconsciously pouting, before you finally let go and head back to your papers. You try to hold your concentration longer than a few minutes, but when you hear Mark going back to his guitar, humming a few notes here and there, you just give up because there’s no way you’re going to finish your thesis when your boyfriend is singing so angelically like that.

“New song?”

“Yeah.”

“Sounds nice.”

“Thanks. It still feels a bit weird on some parts though, but—” Mark stops talking when you walk on all fours toward him, pushing the guitar out of his hands and crawl onto his lap. “Babe?”

You sink your face against the crook of his neck, hands going down and circle their way around his back. “Ssshh,” you say, exhaling all of his scents and thanking whoever it is that invented his perfume because goddamn, Mark smells like cinnamon and chocolate and everything that is good in this world. “I’m out of battery. I need to re-charge.”

Mark spends two seconds in silence before he blurts out laughing, “What are you even saying?” He protests but doesn’t push you away. Instead, he rests his chin on your shoulder and cuddles you closer into his chest.

“You’re so warm,” he murmurs, almost lazily as if he’s a few seconds away from sleeping. You answer by placing a peck on his neck which makes him jolt a little in surprise but not breaking away. The silence between you two is comforting but the way Mark’s jeans are pressing against your bare thighs is not so you move around, trying to find the most perfect comfort zone on his lap—not knowing that it is becoming a new kind of torture for your boyfriend. It’s until you feel something growing underneath you that you begin to halt your movements.

“Mark—”

“I know, don’t say it—”

“You’re kinda… hard.”

“I said, don’t—” He lets out a whine, slamming his temple against your shoulder. “Look, I’m sorry, but you keep moving your butt and it feels like you’re not wearing any pants—“

“I am not wearing any pants.”

“Fuck.” Mark is not the kind of man who curses a lot—he only does it when he’s surprised or when he panics as he tries to process what he’s saying next, so the fact that he’s cursing now can mean he’s feeling one of those things or both or for a whole other reason.

“I mean,” you try to explain, “I’m not trying to seduce you or anything. It’s just your hoodie is way too big for me so I thought why bother? It’s not like we’re going somewhere. We’re just hanging out in my bedroom after all.”

“Oh my God,” Mark groans, throwing his head back as he leans against your bed. “Just give me some time to calm down.”

He really looks like he’s trying to will his boner to go away, what with the way he furrows his eyebrows and keeps his eyes tightly closed in concentration. Mark is too much of a gentleman to ask for your help but you’re willing so it’s more like he’s giving one by providing the chance for you to ravage him.

Just gotta play it cool, though.

And by cool, you mean pressing your palm against his groin when he’s not expecting.

“Yo, what!” He jumps like a scared little cat and honestly, he’s too cute—so utterly cute—that you begin to lean up and kiss him square on the lips. “Mmph!” His protest is muffled by your mouth and the way you entangle your fingers around the back of his hair, pulling him close. He stiffens for a few seconds before he finally lets go, melting into the kiss and you know the next one is going to be your favourite part.

See, the thing with Mark is, he acts shy and awkward most of the time but when the moment is right, he can be passionate about things. Like when he’s playing music. Or writing his raps during his free time.

Or kissing you.

“Mark—“ It’s funny that you initiated this, but it’s you who’s losing your breath. Mark takes your hand when you’re about to fall off his lap, pulling you with enough force to make you tumble back to his chest, and slips his tongue inside your mouth as you gasp. His kisses are deep and fast, almost like he’s in a hurry to kiss you before you disappear from his life forever. You never peg yourself to act like a thirteen-year-old virgin—because you’re certainly not—but when Mark kisses you like this, you feel like you’re acting worse than that.

You can feel one of his hands on your thigh, holding you tight to the point it feels like it’s going to bruise. You push his denim jacket off his shoulders when he kisses your neck, lips hovering hot against your sensitive spot, making you say his name in the tone you’ve never made before.

“You,” Mark whispers between kisses, “have got,” another kiss, his teeth nibbling against your bottom lip, “to stop teasing me like this.” Another slip of his tongue, meeting yours for a split second before he breaks off the kiss. “Or else, I’ll go crazy. I am going crazy because of you.”

“Then why are you stopping?” You ask, breathing a little bit heavier. You cup one of his cheeks, leaning up to kiss him again but he pulls away, hesitating. “Mark?”

“I don’t think we should go any further.”

“You don’t?” You grind your hips against him again and his lips part slightly, trying his best to contain his moan. “Even though you’re this excited?”

“That—” He hisses, gripping hips with both hands to keep you still. “Stop it, you’re not being fair.”

“I’m being honest,” you correct him. “What’s wrong? What’s stopping you? What did I do wrong?”

You can tell he feels sorry for making you feel like this and he’s really contemplating whether he should tell you the real reason or not, so you squeeze his hand and smile at him. “Let me know, please?”

He licks his bottom lip nervously before he sighs. “It’s dumb but…” He looks away, trying to hide his face but you see how the tips of his ears are turning scarlet. “You’re Haechan’s ex and I know he can be a little bit, umm… wild.”

It takes a few seconds for you to process. “So you’re afraid that you’re going to be worse than him in bed?”

“No, I mean—“ He seems frustrated and ashamed, like a child being caught with his hand in a cookie jar. “Okay, yes, I guess you’re right. I am. But it’s more than that.”

The way he fidgets and rambles is just so cute—everything about him is cute—but you never say that out loud because he hates being called cute. He always says you’re cuter than him. “Mark, I don’t care about what happened with me and Haechan. I’m dating you now, aren’t I? You’re being jealous over nothing.”

The way he pouts indicates that he doesn’t particularly agree with your words, but he lets it go. “Well, there’s also one other thing.”

“What thing?”

“You know,” he shrugs, hiding his doe eyes behind his bangs. “That thing.”

“What? What is it? What thing?” Then you open your mouth in realisation. “Oh Mark, baby, I don’t care if you have a small dick. Size doesn’t matter.”

“What—NO!” He shrieks, face in flame. “I mean, not that I regularly measure it and compare it to other guys—I have never even seen another guy’s dick—not that I want to—”

“Mark, you’re rambling again.”

“I DON’T HAVE A SMALL DICK!” He exclaims and you hold back a laugh when he adds in a murmur, “At least I don’t think I have.”

“Okay, my bad.” You massage his shoulders, kissing the corner of his mouth. “Then what is it?”

Another silence, then. “I’ve never done this before.”

“What, sex?”

He weakly nods, teeth nibbling on his bottom lip worriedly, and you feel something warm growing inside your chest. The fact that he’s never been with anyone suddenly becomes the highlight of your life, and if you can be his first then you can just die from happiness by the end of the day.

But it’s because of this very reason, that you have to become very careful.

“Okay, then, let’s just take it slow?” You offer and he seems conflicted about his own expression. Part of him looks relieved but the other part of him looks disappointed.

“Why do I feel like we have our roles in reverse?” He asks, somewhat annoyedly, as you settle yourself better in his lap. You let out a small chuckle in response. “Also, your brother is downstairs.”

“He has his AirPods on.”

“How do you know he has his AirPods on?”

“Johnny always has his AirPods on.”

“But—”

“Mark,” you whisper, closing your eyes as the tip of your nose touching his, “Don’t you want me?”

He lets out a shaky breath, having a hard time trying not to stare at your lips that are becoming even more irresistible by the second. “You don’t even know how much I want you.”

“Then just let go. Just give in, Mark.” You press your temple against his and within this close proximity, his scent is intoxicatingly amazing.

“Okay,” he finally whispers back, but since he still sounds somewhat unsure, you add, “Look, we don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. Just stop me whenever it gets too uncomfortable for you, okay?”

“Okay now we seriously have our roles in reverse. Should I be handing my dick to you now? I think you’ll make better use of it.”

“That sounds like a great idea only if it’s possib—” The rest of your words is replaced with a yelp when Mark suddenly pushes you down onto your back, your head hitting the floor too hard and now he’s yelping.

“Oh, shit—fuck!” He scrambles with his words and with his hands, trying to help you get up and check on your condition at the same time. “I’m so sorry! I was trying to be sexy and be in control or something like that—shit, it just looks way better in my head—I—Why are you laughing?!“

You can’t help it. This is all too ridiculous. Almost refreshing for you, even. You never compared Mark with your ex-boyfriend Haechan before because Mark is way, way better than he’s ever going to be but you remember that with Haechan, things were wild. So wild, that you constantly got caught off guard, not having enough time to focus on your feelings or your own pleasure and just fulfilling his, and his only. With Mark, you feel like you have so much more to give. So much more new experience. So much laughter. So much fun.

“Oh my God, Mark,” you cackle, wiping away some tears from your eyes, “I love you, but if you don’t stop acting so cute, I am going to ravish you myself.”

“What?”

You blink in realisation. “Sorry, that was too much.”

“No, not that.” He knits his eyebrows together. “You love me?”

You feel your heart drops to your stomach. You can’t believe you just said that. It’s not like you didn’t mean it—of course, you mean it. But you’ve tried your best to wait so you can hear him say it first. You are a woman, after all. And to think that you just said it randomly at times like this? After your boyfriend knocked your head against the floor for trying to be sexy? Not really the way you imagined it to be, that’s for sure.

“Umm,” you fondle the hem of your—his—hoodie. Great, now you’re nervous. Suddenly, those papers you have scattered on your table don’t look so bad. “You’re right, I do have some assignments to do. I’ll just get back to—“

Mark grabs your hand, holding you right on your spot. “You love me?”

You can practically hear your own heartbeat in your ears and it’s really fast. “My thesis—”

“Babe, I need to hear you say it.” The way his doe eyes are holding yours seems unfamiliar. His gaze is firm, unfaltering, and you give in because what else can you do? It’s really how you feel after all.

“I love you, Mark.” You can hear the shyness in your own voice and you curse inwardly because where did your confidence go? You were acting so superior before!

Mark doesn’t say a word and when you feel like dying is a better option than standing awkwardly in front of your attractive boyfriend after your stupid unplanned confession, he suddenly lifts your entire body with both hands and lays you down on the bed.

“Mark—“

He kisses you like he needs it to keep himself alive, and you find yourself closing your eyes shut, moulding your lips against his until you can taste the mint flavour from the candy he ate earlier. He tangles his fingers around your locks, the other hand cupping your cheek to angle your face better so he can kiss you deeper. You can’t help but to arch yourself closer to him, chest meeting chest, hips against hips. You can no longer tell whether the moans come from you or him but everything feels hot and going so fast, like you’re free-falling from a skyscraper.

Perhaps he feels the same way because he gradually slows his pace until he finally parts his lips from you. One look at your disheveled face and messy lipstick smeared from your mouth to your cheek, and he goes back to staring at your lips again with want. He mutters, “Fuck” under his breath, almost inaudibly before he crashes his lips against yours, but slower this time, just carefully savouring every taste and breathing in every scent of you.

Mark pulls away only to grab the hem of his white Van Halen shirt, pulling it over his head and tosses it somewhere without care and you have to remind yourself to breathe because fuck me, that was hot. His hair’s a mess—even messier than before and you think that’s just as hot as he can get but then he pushes his hair back with his hand, forehead showing as it glistens with sweat, and says, “I’m not going to hold back anymore.”

Again, fuck me, that was hot.

Mark seems brave enough to finally just let go and consume you in the way he has been wanting to for a while, but you can tell he’s also nervous from the way he fumbles every now and then, especially when he tries to unhook your bra without looking. He has no problem tossing your—his—hoodie away, but when he keeps his eyes closed as he kisses you, it takes a good minute for him to finally unclasp your bra.

He’s momentarily in awe when your naked breasts come into view but he wastes no more time trying to please you with both his hands and his mouth.

It’s good. He’s good. If he’s this good his first time, you can’t wait to see what happens next. You’re too busy losing yourself in his touch until you feel his length pressing against your thigh. By instinct, you press it harder against his groin, eliciting a surprised moan from him.

Goddamn, why is he so hot?

That voice of his; you want to hear it more and more, so you bring his mouth back to yours, align your hips with his and unzip his jeans. Mark is swearing again, but the more he swears, the breathier he sounds and when you rub him over his underwear, his moans are delicious.

“Feels good?” You ask and he kinds of scowl at you because what do you think?

Surprisingly enough, he pushes your hand away from his crotch and when you raise an eyebrow asking why, he kisses your body lower and lower until his face is hovering above your panties.

“Mark,” you call out, “Don’t try to be sexy and pull my underwear down with your teeth or something. You haven’t reached that level yet.”

He responds by tickling you hard on the sides of your stomach and you almost kick him in the face from laughing beyond control.

After all joking has receded, Mark swallows his breath nervously and kisses you on the inside part of your thigh, slowly creeping down to your heat, mouthing against it from over the fabric.

“Want me to take it off?” He asks in the cockiest way you’ve ever seen him do and you wonder who’s the virgin one in this relationship.

“Depends. Do you want to have blue balls for the rest of your life?”

“I’m kidding, geez,” he says, chuckling a bit but it sounds more nervous and he probably is nervous since he’s never done anything like this before.

“Don’t worry, I’ll guide you,” you assure him and he looks like he wants to retort with something clever and snarky but he also kind of needs your guidance so he keeps quiet and just pulls your underwear down and tosses it away.

Mark knows how to use his tongue, he just doesn’t know where he should use his tongue. That’s when your guidance comes handy, you suppose.

“A little bit lower, Mark.”

“Here?”

“Lower.”

“Umm… here?”

“Whoa, too low!” You spring up from the bed, pressing your thighs together so he won’t lick anywhere weird. “Okay, Mark, there’s my vagina and there’s my ass. Some girls like to have their asses eaten, but not me.”

“Right,” he says awkwardly, cheeks burning bright. “Sorry.”

“No, don’t be. Umm…” It’s so awkward and you both kind of just sit on the bed not knowing what to do so you ask, a bit unconvincingly, “Try again?”

To your surprise, Mark nods rather excitedly, like a child eager to learn and that’s cute and all but in this context? Not so much.

But wow, Mark learns fast.

It’s been more than a year since someone has touched you like this and it feels like it’s your first time again, so you’re quickly reduced to a whimpering mess when Mark kisses and flicks his tongue against your private part. And when he sucks at a particular spot, you’re practically screaming his name.

“S-sorry, did I hurt you?” He asks, pulling away, eyes shaking in concern.

“God, no.” You’re this close to shoving his face back to your crotch. “Don’t stop, Mark, please.”

“But if you’re in pain—“

“Mark,” you can practically feel your patience throwing itself out of the window. “If I’m in pain, I will kick you in the face or tell you to stop, so if I don’t do any of that, don’t fucking stop.”

You know you sound a bit desperate. Or a lot. But is there any girl out there who’s not going to sound this desperate when Mark Lee is using his mouth to utter nonsense when he just did a perfectly good job over there?

Lucky for you, Mark actually listens and doesn’t stop going even if you’re mewling his name, to the point of almost sobbing even, and continues to please you until your thighs begin to tremble in delight and you fall back to the bed with the biggest content sigh you’ve ever made in your entire life.

“How was it?” He asks with a little bit of teasing in his tone because he can see how good it was. You can tell he wants to hear you praise him.

“You, Mark Lee,” you breathe out, looking at him with stars in your eyes. “Are the most talented person in the world and I’m not just talking about your talent in music, but in everything.”

He chuckles. “That good?”

You pull him down by his belt, until his chest pressing against yours again. “That good,” you agree before you crash your mouth against his in the most consuming way you’ve ever kissed someone.

Mark eventually has his pants off and you switch positions when he’s finally stark naked. He’s so shy about the whole thing that he barely keeps eye contact with you, and he stutters hard, asking where the condom is when you begin to position yourself on top of him. You shake your head, telling him that you don’t have one and add, “Just tell me when you’re about to come so you can pull out just in time.”

Mark opens and closes his mouth like a fish gasping for air, probably about to protest but can’t come up with any better solution. Besides, he basically just throws everything out of the door when you sit down on his lap, your walls stretching against his length in one swift motion and he throws his head back.

“Fuck!” He breathes heavily, looking at you specifically at the part where you both are connected. “You’re wet—how are you so wet—and warm—oh my God—I’m—“

“You’re rambling again.” It’s the third time you said that to him in the last hour, which must have been some kind of a record. Not important right now, though. You’re focusing yourself to adapt to his length—because he’s nowhere small, it turns out—and slide up and down when it stings less.

“Okay, shit, wait—“ Mark sinks his nails on the sides of your hips, making you wince a little and he pulls back, muttering “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, but I feel like I’m going crazy. Can we stop?”

“Too much?”

“Too much.”

You tease him by clenching your walls around him and he just groans loudly in the sexiest way you’ve ever heard a man groan. “Babe, please,” he begs, eyes half-lidded in lust. “You’re not being fair. It’s my first time.”

“So?” You can’t help it. You’re having so much fun. You rock your hips against him again and he just loses it. Mark grabs you by the waist, bringing you back down to the bed and muffle your laughter with his mouth.

“Since you can’t stop teasing me about it,” Mark says, spreading your legs apart by instinct and seeing him between your thighs is just the sexiest thing you’ve ever witnessed. “I’ll take control from here.”

Mark moves rather awkwardly, and sloppily from time to time but he is hitting the right spot. He’s too enthusiastic though, which doesn’t make him last long. He comes undone soon after, dripping liquid onto your stomach before your own orgasm can hit you but he doesn’t spend his time lying beside you on the bed. Instead, he quickly inserts one finger into you, then two, pumping in and out as he analyses your expression—making sure that he’s doing right and not hurting you in the process. You clutch your fingers around his bicep, urging him to go faster with your mouth parting halfway in pleasure and he smiles proudly at the sight. Smirking, he brings his mouth back to suck on whatever that is that makes you feel like the world is ending and you don’t fucking care because of Mark, oh yes, Mark!

When you’re done, he pulls his fingers out and licks the tips. He’s probably not trying to be sexy but more out of curiosity or just trying to imitate some dudes in those porn videos he watches from time to time, but goddamn, please do that again.

“Sorry for making such a mess,” he says, pushing the bangs out of your eyes, “I’ll go grab some tissues to clean you up—”

You bring him down to kiss him, senselessly, longingly, and languidly. Just enjoying the moment as you come down from your high. “You know,” you say, “I don’t know if I’m a good teacher, or you’re just one hell of a student, but that was amazing.”

Mark blushes but he grins like a child. “Am I better than Haechan?”

“I hate you for bringing him up because he no longer exists in my life but I bet my ass he’s never going to be as good as you. Our first time is ten times better than my last time with him.”

“You’re being honest?”

“Ten thousand percent.”

Mark plops down on the bed next to you, punching the air in a winning pose. “Hell yes!”

“Mark?”

“Yeah, babe?”

“Let’s take a shower together. You see, practice makes perfect.”

As he’s busy trying to wash the blush away from his face, there’s a loud knocking sound coming from the other side of your door.

“Have you two bunnies done fucking each other’s brains out yet? I need to take my AirPods you borrowed.”

Mark stares at you in horror when you finally remember that you, indeed, borrowed Johnny’s AirPods this morning.

You begin to sweat. “Oops?”

***

1K notes · View notes

cixthotshit · 3 years

Text

A Cup of Rose Americano

Pairing: Bae Jinyoung x Original Female Character|Reader

Genre: Smut, Fluff, Poor Girl/Rich Boy, Coffee Shop/Gangster AU (IDEK how I got here, just go with it)

Summary: There's more than meets the eye with every person, including Bae Jinyoung, the world's finest barista at Personal Barista Cafe

Word count: 4.7k

Rating/Warnings: Mature / Explicit Sexual Content: Porn With Some Plot, Kissing, Mirror Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Creampie

Author’s Note: I wanted to write a fluffy Coffee Shop AU but NGL something else has been preoccupying my mind and the world building to this fic kind of went off the rails and transformed into a completely different story. Enjoy this smut, readers! I really want to explore this world a lot more but IDK if I can commit to anything beyond this RN. So please, please enjoy this! Sorry in advance for mistakes! I don't always catch everything when I proofread.

I always appreciate some feedback on my writings!

"Really, it'll be a...new coffee experience," Hyeon assured Sandy. She handed Sandy a green card. It felt like an expensive platinum credit card, the card made of metal, feeling heavy and cold in her hand. "All you have to do is fill out a survey after you get your free coffee. Once you make it inside, hand the card over to your barista."

"Aren't you supposed to find actual volunteers?" Sandy asked, looking at the shiny card. The only thing on the card was the name of the new test cafe, PB Cafe.

“Trust me,” Hyeon said with a grin. “You’ve never had coffee like this. This is free, too. You’re going to say no to free coffee? And I swear, this is really me saying it, their coffee is really good.”

“Fine, thanks for the free coffee.”

“Enjoy!” Hyeon turned her back to Sandy, most likely scanning for potential test subjects for her new marketing event. Being her best friend, Sandy was always her first test subject. She didn’t know if Hyeon’s bosses approved of her taking advantage of all the free stuff she was receiving.

Sandy walked over to a shop that was setup at the southwest corner of a 3 story building. The walls were white and the windows were covered by white curtains. “PB Cafe” was written in black on the front door, though there were no door handles. Standing in front of the door, Sandy noticed a black square pad beside the right side of the door. She pressed the green card to the black pad and jumped slightly as the glass door slid open. A short piano tune played, sounding old but familiar, reminding her of old Hollywood movies from the mid-20th Century.

Tentatively, she stepped in. Walking past the white curtains, she found herself inside a small room. At the back end of the room was a small bar with one wooden chair in front of it. It only took her 4 steps to reach the chair, so she pulled it out and sat down. The wall behind the bar slid down to the floor and a broad shouldered man walked out from what looked like a bright white light before the wall slid back up behind him.

Too shocked to react, Sandy set the green card down onto the smooth marble countertop. Her eyes couldn’t leave the face of her barista. He was very handsome and his small grin softened his masculine exterior. Wordlessly, he took the green card and placed it in the front left pocket of his black apron.

“Welcome to Personal Barista Cafe,” he said in a soft, sultry voice. “My name is Bae Jinyoung, your Personal Barista today. How shall I address you?”

“Uh, just call me Sandy, I don’t like formalities much.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Sandy. If you don’t like formalities feel free to call me BaeJin or BaeBae.” She gave a soft chuckle and threw her hand over her mouth, feeling her cheeks warm up. Such a sultry man telling her to call him something as cute as BaeBae tickled her. “Is this your first drink with PB Cafe?”

“Yes,” she replied. “I don’t know anything about this cafe, except that you have good coffee.”

“A Personal Barista will make you a personalized drink,” he explained, pulling out a menu form. “Whatever you order, I will make it in front of you. If you want to know how I prepare your drink, please let me know and I will explain as I go. If you want small talk instead, I enjoy a small conversation as I prepare you a drink. If you want silence, for any reason, please don’t feel pressured to speak if you don’t want to.”

“Can I get an Americano?” she asked, after glancing at the long list of coffee drinks. The menu was simple and elegant, the writings were in cursive but the paper was black and the ink white. She liked the seemingly simple attention to detail. “How long have you been a barista, BaeJin?”

“Almost a year,” he replied. He poured fresh ground coffee into a metal contraption with a long neck. She pressed her lips together as her eyes were fixed on his skilled, large hands. He was using a device to compact the coffee grounds.

“Do you enjoy being a barista?”

“I do. It allows me to be creative. My regular job is stressful.”

He put the coffee grounds into the machine and pressed a few buttons. She watched him place a small white espresso mug under the spout of the machine. He grabbed a large white mug of coffee, and looked at her with a soft grin.

“This is your side hustle?” she asked. PB Cafe seemed like it paid well.

“Most people have more than one job these days,” he replied.

“That’s true,” she replied. “I have a day job and a night job.”

“What are your jobs?”

“I’m interning at a law firm, helping a paralegal out. I’m hoping to get my private investigator’s license soon.”

“You want to be a private investigator?” he asked.

“I want to be a lawyer,” she answered, “but having a private investigator’s license helps me pick up skills. Research is the true gift of being a good lawyer.”

“Research. You must be very smart and hard working.”

“You are sweet,” she said, resting an elbow onto the counter, leaning forward. “I wish my smarts and hard work were enough to give me success. I’m lacking in luck lately.” His eyes drifted away from the espresso machine and looked into her eyes. She felt her cheeks turn hot, realizing she had overshared. It’d been a sad thought, too. “I feel very lucky right now.”

“Sandy, I don’t mean to make assumptions about people but if I were to guess you are someone with expensive tastes,” he said. He pulled out two small brown glass bottles from a drawer. “But, you settle for less.”

“I..” she breathed out.

She should have been insulted, but her barista BaeJin was right. Sandy had always been envious of people who could afford designer things or had the means to go on extravagant vacations, but all of that had always been a dream. The closest she got was free shit from Hyeon. A drink from PB Cafe was likely three times that of a drink from Starbucks, and Sandy could only afford Starbucks for special occasions.

“Why are you saying this?”

“I want to make you a drink in which you will appreciate,” he replied, pulling out a single stemmed pink rose from under the counter, and handed it to her. She felt her cheeks flush with heat as she accepted it. “Refined, seemingly ostentatious, but simple and hopefully, delicious.”

He poured hot water from a glass kettle into the mug. She felt her cheeks turn hot again as he reached over and plucked a single petal from the rose she held. He tilted a single drop of liquid from one of the brown bottles onto the petal.

“Rose water,” he said to her as he locked eyes with her for a second. He placed the rose petal into the mug, letting it float in the hot water. He poured the espresso into the mug of water, and took a spoon to scoop out the wilted petal, tossing it away before handing the drink to her.

She gave it a sip, and shut her eyes, a smile on her lips. Using a flower as aromatic as a rose was difficult to pull off in cuisine. Oftentimes the rose aroma was too overpowering, reminding one’s nose of perfume instead of food. Baejin’s Rose Americano, though, was the perfect balance of a good cup of coffee elevated with some elegance, refined by the subtlest hint of a rose’s sweet scent. The warm breath she exhaled after a hot sip of Americano filled her senses with flowery comfort.

“This is the most...beautiful cup of coffee I’ve ever tasted,” she replied, setting the mug down when she was half finished. “It tastes...beautiful.”

He gave a small chuckle, his eyes crinkling as he smiled. She bit her bottom lip, trying not to smile any wider than she already was. He was incredibly cute, grinning in reaction to her compliment. How could a man exude the amount of sensuality like BaeJin yet be so cute that she wanted to squish him like a marshmallow?

“You like it?” he asked.

“I do,” she replied. “I didn’t know a cup of Americano could be improved. Thank you for this cup of coffee. You’re a gifted barista.”

“Thank you. I would love to make you another drink.”

“I’ll try to come back one day,” she said earnestly.

She sipped her drink and glanced at her phone. Thanking her talented, handsome (and cute) barista BaeJin one last time, Sandy finished her drink and sprinted out of the odd, surreal cafe. She had to get ready for work. Smelling the pink rose in her hand, Sandy smiled to herself. Who knew her barista would be the first man to give her a rose?

“Diamond! Malibu was accidentally double booked,” Danielle called out into the dressing room. “Can you give a lap dance in the Blue Champagne Room before going home?”

“Wait,” Sandy said, holding the gold hoop earring she’d just taken off her left earlobe, “I’m not going to chase Malibu for the flat fee. The last time I covered for her, not only did her John not tip me but I had to chase her for 4 days before she gave me the cash.”

“I have a hard time chasing her down, too,” Danielle said with a heavy sigh, handing her purple vape pen to Sandy to hold. She dug into her pink and purple Bedazzled fanny pack, and fished out a few bills. She handed a bag of clothing to Sandy. “Let me know if this John is handsy or out of line. He’s a new customer. You have five minutes, babe. Fix your makeup.”

Handing the vape pen back to her boss, Sandy put the cash into her purse before shutting and locking the drawer to her vanity. She put her earring back on and retouched her eye makeup and lipstick. Her locks of hair looked good as she combed her fingers through her hair, looking into the mirror before getting up to change.

Sandy hadn’t exactly planned on becoming a stripper, but during her freshman year in college, she took a class on feminist studies, specifically on sex work. What started out as a learning experience in respecting sex work, and educating herself on the legal struggles of sex workers’ rights, Sandy soon found herself stripping as a means of extra income. She herself was in need of money, and recognized her beauty was valued enough that she could make capital from it.

Having walked out on her dysfunctional family as soon as she turned 18, Sandy had been hustling on her own for years. She was still working towards a career in law, but in the meantime, she was balancing between her day job as an unpaid intern at a shitty law firm and her night job as a stripper at a club called Blue Paradise. Giving lap dances were only nice when she received good tips, but they didn’t happen often enough. All she wanted was a good tip.

Pulling out the outfit Danielle handed to her, she took off her clothes and put on her new outfit. She wore a neon pink G-string bikini bottom with her matching lace bra under a black pencil skirt and a white costume button up office dress shirt. She put on a loose blue tie around her neck, and put on a pair of thick black framed glasses, matching it with her black leather knee high boots. Apparently, this new customer had a librarian kink.

Walking down the hall, toward the other side of the back of the club, she entered the room with the blue door at the end of the hall. The Champagne Rooms, where customers received their private lap dances, were color coded. The Blue Room was where the clients with specific kinks went.

Opening the door, Sandy pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose, and looked up to see her John seated on the black couch. The dim lighting of the room cast a shadow over his body, making it hard for her to make out his face. She blinked, and closed her mouth, realizing that her customer was her barista from PB Cafe, BaeJin. It had been days since she had her cup of Rose Americano.

He was wearing a loosely worn grey sweater with black denim jeans. She didn’t think it was possible but he looked more handsome than she last remembered. Perhaps, with her body so close to his, knowing that he was there for devious reasons, her face flushed and her nipples hardened as heat rushed through her body from head to toe.

“BaeJin!” she said, forgetting her sexy librarian character.

“Don’t move,” he said, looking alarmed. She stood completely still, one hand on the door handle. “You’re a stripper, Sandy?”

“You...you remember me?” He nodded. “Stripping is helping me pay for my law degree.” She licked her lips and tilted her head, pushing her chest forward slightly. “I can give you what you want.”

“I can’t do this,” he replied, crossing his left leg over his right. His eyes left her, and diverted to the ground. Her ego was bruised. Not only did she need the money, but her vanity made her feel upset that he didn’t want a lap dance from her. “I should go.”

“I have to try to keep you here,” she said shyly, pressing her back against the door. “If I don’t, that means I’m not good at my job.”

“How long should we be in here for you to be considered good at your job?” he asked, his eyes returning to meet her gaze.

“You don’t want a lap dance? Am I not cute? My tits too small?”

He gave a chuckle, and looked away when his eyes moved to her chest as she talked.

“You’re very cute,” he replied, “but that’s the problem. As a barista, I don’t date customers. Since you didn’t actually pay for your drink, I thought it’d be OK to ask you out if I ever saw you again. But if I pay for this lap dance, I wouldn’t want to ask you out. It’s not fair for me to proposition you while you’re working.”

“You’ve been thinking hard about me?” Her cheeks felt hot and goosebumps formed on her arms. “Would you accept my invitation if I asked you out after this? I’m actually supposed to be off work by now, but this is my last job tonight. If I don’t give you a lap dance, we didn’t cross any lines, right?”

He nodded, and she gave a nervous chuckle.

“You said that being a barista was your side hustle,” she said, noticing the expensive watch and ring on his left hand. Sex workers had to know street codes to keep themselves safe, and watches and rings were how gang members communicated their loyalties and rankings. “What’s your main job? You said it’s stressful.”

His right hand wrapped around his platinum watch, the case of the watch encrusted with diamonds. The C9 Gang was a wealthy gang with origins in Tokyo, Japan, platinum was their calling card. BaeJin’s gold band emerald ring sat on his middle finger, indicating he was a made man of high rank. Sandy was impressed; BaeJin had acclimated to a high status in a gang at a young age.

“How long have you been working here, Sandy?” he asked in response.

“Diamond,” she answered, her grip remaining firm on the door. “My stage name is Diamond.”

“Sandy...Diamond,” he said with a grin. He stood, and she took a deep inhale of breath as he took a step forward and pressed his body against hers, his left arm wrapping around her waist as his hand gripped onto her wrist. Her hold on the door handle loosened. “You are the diamond in the rough in Blue Paradise. You still want to invite me out on a date?”

She took a gulp of breath, staring deeply into his dark brown eyes. He licked his lips and her eyes drifted to his mouth. Giving the most gentle nod of her head, she said, “Yes.”

“I drive a blue Ferrari F60 America,” he said as the tip of his nose touched hers.

“I don’t know anything about cars,” she replied, shutting her eyes. His breath was warm, making it hard for her to breathe. He chuckled and she felt his head rest onto her shoulder.

She opened her eyes when she felt a hand touch her chin.

“I drive a blue car,” he said, his eyes drifting down her face to her lips. His thumb ran across her bottom lip gently, sending heat deep into her groin. Her stomach ached at the touch. “It’ll be the most expensive looking car you’ll see when you walk outside.” He looked directly into her eyes again. “I’m a dangerous man, Sandy...Diamond. I have to ask you one more time, do you want to keep talking to me?”

She chewed on the inside of her left cheek nervously, and furrowed her eyebrows. Given how close she was to getting the paid job as a paralegal at Johnston’s &Partners, Sandy was one step closer to her dreams of becoming a lawyer. Would it be ethical to date a gangster?

“Will you take me home or will we be going to your place?” she answered. Life was too short not to take risks.

Upon his request, she left work wearing her costume. BaeJin’s description of having the most expensive looking car was accurate. The navy blue car shone brighter than any other car, and the curves of the body created an elegant design to the car. He’d opened the passenger door for her. She realized her skirt barely covered her ass as the cold leather from the seat hit the back of her thighs.

He drove them up a curvy hill to get to his expensive mansion, placed behind a small forest. It sat atop of a mountainous hill, overlooking the bright lights of the city far below. BaeJin was a man of very high rank by the looks of his home. It was large and designed with multiple floor to ceiling windows. Sandy took a soft gulp of air as her mouth felt dry.

“Your home is beautiful,” she said when he led her into his home, the hallway lined with expensively framed paintings. The jade vase that held 3 white lilies beside the coat hanger looked like it was worth more than everything she owned, including the small amount of cash she had in her bank account.

BaeJin’s home aesthetic was minimalist, though each room had a piece of furniture that popped out, like the jade vase in the front entrance. In his bedroom, he had a rose gold encrusted full length mirror sitting at the foot of his bed. It was shameless, but did not surprise her. Their eyes locked as BaeJin sat down at the foot of the bed. Their fingers intertwined when she reached her left hand out to his outstretched right hand.

“I spent a week trying not to think about you,” he said, pulling her easily onto his lap. His free hand wrapped around her waist. “The closest thing to you was trying to get a stripper to dress up like a sexy librarian.”

“Aren’t you lucky?” she said, squeezing his hand. “You went to Blue Paradise wanting a fantasy. Instead, you left with your fantasy.”

His hand released hers and she felt his hand between her legs, sliding up against her slit. Shutting her eyes she gave a soft moan, surprised at his swift movement.

“You deserve the best in life,” he said into her ear before grazing his teeth gently against her neck. “Don’t ever settle for less.”

He kissed her, his lips warm and firm. His tongue parted her lips and she gave a soft hum. She pushed his tongue out of her mouth, appreciating the taste of floral green tea from him. Her fingers tangled into his hair, pulling him closer to her. He tasted better than the beautiful cup of Rose Americano.

With a clouded head, she helped him pull his sweater off as he aggressively pulled her top off of her, the cheap buttons popping loudly as they flew into the air. Her skirt failed to exist when he ripped the zipper and tore the fabric apart with his bare hands.

“Are you going to rip me apart?” she asked breathlessly when his fingers found their way under her bra, fondling her erect nipple. She gave a soft moan and he grinned as he pinched her sensitive bud.

“I’ll be as hard or soft as you want,” he assured her. The pad of his thumb grazed against her nipple. Her back shivered as a sharp heat rode up her back.

“I like a bit of both,” she said, her cheeks hot. It felt like a dream to have BaeJin telling her he would do as she wanted. “You ruined my skirt.”

“The cheap costume skirt?” he asked, his hand returning to rubbing her slit. “You don’t have to settle, remember?” She shut her eyes, her hand grabbing his arm as two of his fingers pressed against her clit. “I like you best without clothes anyway.” The heat intensified as his fingers moved down lower, moistening her panties with the slick heat coming out of her pussy. Her back shook again as his fingers moved up against her slit, and then back down. “Your voice is lovely.”

She moaned as she rested her head against his chest, his fingers continually creating more heat between her legs. One finger slipped under her panties, pulling the fabric away from her wet cunt. The back of his knuckle pressed against the engorged bud of her clit, and she mewled as he rubbed up and down against her.

“BaeBae,” she could only speak with a shaky breath, “BaeBae, I’m going to come.”

Her hips thrust haphazardly against his knuckle as a small flash of heat washed over her, goosebumps forming up the back of her neck. Her orgasm disappeared as soon as it came and she breathed through her mouth. Her pussy felt wet as her slick heat dripped out of her.

“I was just playing with you,” he said with an amused smile, his eyes locked onto the mess between her legs, including his wet fingers. He spread her juices onto her folds, and moved the pads of his index and middle fingers to draw small circles onto her clit. She mewled, shutting her eyes, as her hips rutted against the motions of his fingers. “But with you this wet, I can fuck you right now.”

“BaeBae,” she breathed out, opening her eyes.

Her eyebrows were furrowed as she looked at him. Wordlessly, she stood as their hands began removing each other’s clothes off. His expensive jewelry remained on as he pulled her back to his front, making her stand between his legs. His hand went between her legs and he massaged the inside of her thigh. She hummed a soft moan, enjoying the way his hand relaxed her muscles.

Both of his hands wrapped around her waist, and his lips kissed her neck. He requested she trust him, and one hand reached down to her right knee and had her stretch her leg out to rest over his. As his other hand went to her left knee, she understood what he was doing. He wanted a full view of her pussy so she sat on his lap with her legs hooked over his.

“Ready to put this to use?” he asked, his hands kneading her hips. His reflection from the mirror was staring at her. She saw the cheeks of her flushed face turn a bright red, and she tilted her head down to look away from the mirror. The blood coursing through her chest up to her head clouded her vision. “Look at us.”

His right hand cupped her face, and she felt his wrist press up against the front of her neck. The pulse from his wrist beat rapidly against the pulse on her neck, and she struggled to breathe as her eyes locked onto his from the reflection in the mirror. Hot blood rushed to her groin and her hips jerked forward, out of her control. His left arm wrapped around her waist had her firmly in his hold, so all she could do was wiggle in his lap. Feeling the muscles of his thighs flex under her made her buttocks tighten, her body anticipating his cock.

“If you let me take you raw,” he said softly against her ear, his eyes locked with hers through the reflection of the mirror, “that’ll make you mine.”

His hold on her face was gone as his hand grabbed his cock. He rubbed his hard cock against her slit. She bit her bottom lip as his heat caused more juices to pool out of her cunt. It made her nerves shake, itching her skin in unbearable heat. He blinked, and his eyebrows furrowed as she opened her mouth to breathe loudly.

“I’m yours,” she said clearly. He groaned as he pushed the tip of his cock into her entrance. “Give me everything, BaeJin.” Pleasure blinded her vision as she saw nothing but white and gold flecks of stars. She gave a loud gulp when she felt his hand grip onto her chin again, his wrist pressing against her throat. Her grip on his arms tightened as she held onto him for leverage. His cock pushed in deeper, and the walls of her pussy trembled as heat filled her body in overwhelming waves. “I’m yours.”

His lips were on her neck and when her vision cleared all her eyes could focus was on the way his cock was fucking her pussy. He started with shallow pushes, the rhythm steady as she bounced on his lap. She came and she gave a gentle mewl, blurting out his name as her walls squeezed his cock. A gentle chuckle escaped her lips as she saw him shut his eyes tight.

“You’re so easy to please,” he said as he pushed in deep. She gave a loud groan as he pulled out roughly before pushing in fast, going in balls deep. He started a steady, deep rhythm and she cried as she was filled with undiluted pleasure.

“You fuck so good,” she moaned, her hand reaching back to grab his hair. He sucked on her neck, leaving a red mark before he kissed her shoulder. “BaeJin, fuck me. I’m gonna - I’m - I’m gonna come.”

His grip around her waist tightened as he pushed faster into her, and they bent forward together as he came into her in deep pushes. Her fingers dug into his skin as she shut her eyes, taking in the sensation of his hot seed filling up her insides.

“Come,” he panted out heavily as she felt him withdraw from her. She whimpered as she felt his middle finger push into her come-filled cunt. His thumb rubbed up against her clit, making her nerves dance in hot waves. She cried out a soft orgasm as she came again. She breathed heavily as she rested against his body.

“We barely know each other,” she said after a while. She didn’t know how long they sat together, staring at their reflection before she finally spoke.

“We have the rest of our lives to get to know each other,” he said, running a hand up and down her thigh, sending heat up and down her back. “You are mine now.”

He pulled her off his lap, and they laid in bed together. A shiver went down her back as he kissed her shoulder. They were facing each other, her left leg locked between his muscular thighs.

Giving a laugh, she watched him grab her wrist. He kissed the inside of her wrist before kissing the inside of her elbow. She shut her eyes as she felt his lips on her shoulder. Every kiss sent a vibrating heat under her skin. His mouth sucked on her neck and she grabbed onto the back of his hair as his teeth grazed against her skin. The muscles in her stomach tightened. The world ceased to exist as BaeJin’s embrace consumed her.

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