#i'm just in the hell of my own making

[spyglassrealms]

had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing

#normally I don't chronicle my dreams here but fucking hell that one was funny #I think this would genuinely make tumblr better tbh #@ staff do this cowards #spy has thoughts #my life is a sitcom and i am my own laugh track #functional website #spy's smash hits #Glock function #edit for everyone in the notes saying 'everyone clapped' #I know I can't prove to you that it happened for real you're just gonna have to trust me on this #but I swear on my goddamn life I'm not making this up #I make so many conscious puns that sometimes my subconscious cooks up a real good one

[arcaneyouth]

i think the one downside to people thinking my comic is super awesome and compelling is that i don't actually get to ramble about spoilers very often because people really want to see it play out naturally aisdUHASLDIUHASLIDH which is fair and flattering. i'm going to implode with all the words in my chest i'm not allowed to say tho

#what do you mean i don't get to tell you everythinga bout my ocs i love my ocs???? #i'm fairly sure most of the people in my spoilers chat have it muted which is their right and they can do whatever they want #i'm just in the hell of my own making #i fucking love talking sooo so so much #and there's only a few people who i can legally ramble about this specific stuff to 😔 life is so suffering #queued post #as silly as this problem is. it is genuinely kind of distressing sometimes #i don't expect anyone to let me pity ramble to them it's fine i care about artistic integrity i understand why i can't ramble about this #it is also still so much i can't say and can't typically get a proper outlet for #i have GOT to find new ways to cope with this #writing script has been semi helpful..... i've gotten a TON of writing sessions in the last couple months #half of which were because i was so excited i couldn't breathe and i got it out through Writing It Out #other times tho? it just gets me more excited and more sad i can't tell anyone yet ALSIUDHASLIUDHASD #my torment as a person making a story is endless #when i was younger my problem was that i didn't get a lot of validation because nobody knew my comic #my problem now is i'm still not getting validation because i've done a really good job and now can't talk about it more without consequence #either way it's kinda lonely. hyperfixating on ocs is rough.

[egophiliac]

I got a really tough question.

What’s your favorite Twst event of ALL TIME?

I like Harveston

this truly is the hardest question. :( but after much consideration, I think Endless Halloween Night wins out for me, because it's nonstop Characters Being Silly the whole way through. the whole thing is just lots of these little dorks having the most ridiculous interactions, which is always my favorite! and of course the big twist is SO delightfully stupid and doubles down SO hard that it becomes AMAZING and I 100% unironically adore it. AND it's Halloween! everyone is in their cute little costumes and having a spooky adventure! it's great!

however, I am ALSO a big fan of the Harveston event! how can I not be! everyone is wearing comfy winter outfits and getting along really weirdly well with Epel's grandma and he's getting a little worried about that! my terrible loud son sews a plush squirrel and then gives it a silly little nickname and refuses to leave it behind when it breaks! the ending shot with the sled! I LOVE IT.

obviously we need the best of both worlds now

#art #twisted wonderland #malleus in the background: RYUU } >:( #(this is an au where sebek wears his own halloween costume and isn't obsessively trying to match with malleus) #(unless malleus is also wearing a patchwork squirrel costume. hold on wait i should've drawn that instead) #my favorite is when people draw sebek's room and have risugurumi just hanging out on his desk or something #SHE GAVE HER LIFE FOR HIM #well she gave her leg or something anyway #it's been a while i forget #anyway endless halloween night also has my favorite cutscene #which is the five second long cutscene that is literally just floyd going OOH WHAT DOES THIS BUTTON DO and then a battle starts #thank you twst #i believe this is also when trey finds out that sebek's dad is a dentist and immediately makes it weird #while rook is just. dancing around and singing opera in the background. #'did...did he hit his head when we fell through the mirror?' 'no he's just like that' #i have to stop or i'm going to end up recounting the entire event #(sorry this took so long!) (i have been back in Deadline Hell) #(i didn't mean to actually answer this on halloween but it kind of worked out! HAPPY HALLOWEEEEEN)

[heybiji]

double life

#masks: a new generation #masks a new generation #ttrpg #pbta #superheroes #dad mode and this job is ruining my life mode #this hell i am in #me before: i don't really care about superheroes #me making my own superheroes: I SEE NOW #gm mode is just going ham on the npcs #masks: overlook city #masks: overlook #trying to explain he's a serious character in the same breath as describing how his life was ruined by a giant dinosaur balloon #TS in rare video footage shouting about how a balloon doesn't have a soul but he does!!! LOL #all my character must struggle to maintain their dignity it's my favorite thing #hard to root for him though he basically chose being a supe over being a good husband and father so... oop. #anyway #true strike #truestrike #antonio salvo #tony salvo #sorry masks tag for flooding you with npc stuff i'm the gm and i still need enrichment

[wiisagi-maiingan]

#the nearest grocery store to me is a 30+ minute drive #i live in basically a tiny island of just homes and NOTHING ELSE surrounded by just fields #i am literally housebound rn because i don't have my license and there is NO WAY to get anywhere without driving #look tiny towns still have people in them who are just as bored as you are #and would probably be thrilled to have some clubs or library activities #hell those things are almost definitely already happening you just need to find them #anyway i'm kinda bitter about these tags don't make assumptions about people on their own posts lmao

[muzzlemouths]

the issue with chronically having low energy is that you don't have it in you to reblog everything u want to with the tags you want at that very moment so you make a queue. the issue with the queue is that it takes just as much effort to queue posts as it does to reblog them with tags so you start Liking posts to place into queue later and the issue with that is

#muzz mumbles #hi. i'm in a hell of my own making #if i've ever liked your artwork i promise i PROMISE i'm going to reblog it #i'm just soooo silly goofy. so so funny so um. so. (kill me)

[shorlinesorrows]

qpr jean and neil. that's all i'm gonna say.

do you see my vision?

#i might add onto this later but right now I'm too busy crying #“misplaced forever partner” ARE YOU KIDDING ME THAT DESTROYED ME #neil ordering a hit to keep jean safe changed my brain chemistry #i need them to be friends #i need them to call each other and gossip and send each other stupid memes that only they understand #i need them to slowly grow closer as they heal until one day they can finish each other's sentences #and they ocassionally make super dark jokes about their trauma out of the blue (they bet on how people will react competitively) #i need them to call each other derogatory names but get Super Upset whenever anyone else talks shit about the other and offer to kill them #and i would love them to reclaim the spots next to each other that riko set #and make them their own #they're not partners on the court but they sure as hell are partners in life #the mcs ever #at one point andrew and jeremy are just looking at each other across a table at a restaurant as these two bicker #and realize they have somehow both become the Third Wheel despite the fact that 1) there's four of them and 2) jean and neil aren't dating #the amount of queer platonic pining i could fit in these traumatized people #the: “i'm lowkey obsessed with you but I Really don't like you romantically and I don't know what to do with it” #and the: “oh thank hell me too i thought i was even weirder than i already am. wanna go harass the fbi with me?" #jeremy and andrew watch this trainwreck both exasperatedly and proudly you can't convince me otherwise #cannot convince me that these four won't somehow end up living in each others pockets even if they live 1000 miles away #kevin pops in frequently as his usual wonderful diva self #anyway i'm going insane how yall doing #neil josten #jean moreau #all for the game #the sunshine court

[coockie8]

It's so weird and funny to me when antis will be like "coping with taboo fiction is fine, but don't you understand you can't post it because people might get off to this!?!?"

Like what a stranger masturbates to is any of my business at all.

#I think the reason anti rhetoric just doesn't work on me at all is because I'm just too addicted to minding my own business at this point #if it's not causing real harm (and discomfort is not harm) then I genuinely could not give less fucks about what a stranger gets off to #to any anti reading this #I promise your life will improve *exponentially* if you just start minding your own business #'cause unironically y'all seem miserable af 90% of the time #and the only times you *don't* seem miserable as hell it's because you're literally celebrating the murder/suicide of a real human being #because of fiction that makes you uncomfortable #think about that for like 20 seconds #just anti things #anti bs #proship #anti anti #profic #pro fiction #proshipper safe

[vellichorom]

yes i will call thierry a woman. yes you may also. he is whatever you want him to be

#twinkie talks #TSP blogging #i've spent almost 3 years thinking about his gender i still don't know what it is. i've always liked cis or trans man narrator.... #but idc YOU decide #someday i'm going to make my own fandom content & just post thierry over a ton of pride flags & confuse everyone to hell #THE ONLY THING I'M SURE OF IS THAT HE'S GOT HE / HIM PRONOUNS & HE LIKES MEN #( rosemary & your self insert count as men ) #i've seen people refer to him as just butch or butch lesbian & i really love that idea #someone said he's genderqueer once god bless #fuck it make that man a lesboy let's go

[merp-blerp]

Pro-gaylor swifties (like swifties who aren't gaylors themselves but are nice to gaylors) should make a fandom-name for themselves so I know who I'm safe with 😅

#i just get nervous when ever i do more than reblog a gaylor post #like when i make my own #tumblr has always been such a safe place for me #and i don't want that to end because where else would I go? #most other socials are video-based and I'm much more of a text post kind of girl #the only other text-based cite i know of is twitter/x and I'll die before I join that hell hole #while i love the gaylor fandom we take a lot of hits from dicks #i haven't gotten any of my own personally but it's a bit scary to know a hetlor could find my post and come at me or something #gaylor #friends of dorothea #lgbetty #taylor swift

[asthewintersun]

day 01/100 | one hundred days of books

i've spent this week reading ninth house, after finally getting my hands on it last november. i recall there being controversy when it was first released, but honestly, i still don't understand why it provoked so much anger. the book comes with its own undercurrents of anger, and with so much still unresolved i don't expect that to end any time soon, but there's also something cathartic in it, every time a man gets brutalised for his misogyny, every time alex gets to truly show who she is. this was definitely not an easy read, but it was a powerful one.

#ninth house #booklr #idk when i'm gonna get the sequel since i have 20 other books already sitting around waiting to be read! #but i definitely want to get hell bent sometime this year #in the meantime i'm not productive enough for the 100 days challenge #so i figured i'd make my own one for books! #no they will not be a hundred consecutive days just 100 days over the course of a year #something fun to try and gets me talking more about the books i'm enjoying

[mechieonu]

haven't seen HH yet & my only real hope is that charlastor keeps whatever dynamic they had goin on

#their biggest allure for me—other than the song and dance—is the inevitable betrayal arc #charlie's genuinely a sweetheart and her believing in him comes from that AND her naivety #and combining that w their weird power imbalance (i like to think that she's stronger by default as princess but he's got the street smarts #they've got the recipe for something brokenhearted #ESPECIALLY when alastor inevitably submits himself to the mortifying ordeal of love and friendship #girl help! the woman i'm working with is a lovely contradiction to everything i've ever known abt hell and redemption! #essentially: nothing is sexier than ignoring all the warning signs & letting yourself be goaded hook line and sinker #into a terrible decision by the villain/your own hubris #charlastor #hazbin hotel #i hope she makes a deal w him & that its her bestworst decision ever. i hope that al realizes how much he‚ too‚ has been irrevocably changed #why are all my favorite ship dynamics just billford #remember to sail the seven seas; amzn is on the boycott list

[cosmichawk]

dottore decided to go signora route when dealing w/ nahida

#talking?? what's that? imma just snatch the gnosis and be done w/ it #me and my bestie were talking and i was like 'bro i draw dottore so often that i memorised his design' #and my friend was like lmao if that's the case draw him talking to nahida NOW #obv this is a polished result #BUT i was right. sketch looked really accurate #you know you down BAD when you can recall char's design from your memory #he is the only char which design i know by heart #like i stare at zhongli's back every day but i won't be able to draw him from behind even w/ 50% accuracy #but there is like 3d model of dottore in my head and i will draw him w/ 80% accuracy whatever his pose will be w/out using any references #anyways now i'm going back to my dottore triptych and back to personal hell of my own making #genshin impact #dottore #nahida #ch - art

[third-doctor]

I feel like I'm going insane. That episode read to me as a lot more tragic than other people are reading it. Yeah they were racist and rich and spoiled and awful but they were just kids. They were all just kids. Lindy was absolutely terrified throughout the whole thing and clinging desperately to what she knew, which was terrible. They could've had the chance to learn and become better but they chose to go die and it's infuriating and tragic because nobody deserves that. Nobody deserves to be eaten by slugs or die of exposure in the woods. Nobody deserves to suffer like that. But they chose it rather than let the Doctor help them because they'd rather stay in their rich white supremacist bubble and he just wants to help and there's nothing he can do.

Maybe it's because one of my core beliefs is that nobody deserves death and suffering. Nobody. Even the worst person on earth can learn from their mistakes and come back and change and everyone deserves that chance. There's no such thing as too late. But they're never going to get that chance because they actively rejected it and to me that's still very, very sad.

#dead men do tell tales #doctor who #doctor who spoilers #dot and bubble #I am losing my mind. I am actually losing my mind #maybe it's because my brain is always telling me that I'm the worst person alive #instead of just saying that no I'm not my response is to say yeah okay and even the worst person alive doesn't deserve to die and can chang #what matters is that I'm taking the next step. and anyone can choose at any point to take the next step #and they actively rejected doing that and it's sad and infuriating #because nobody deserves to die #but they get what they chose #there's also the fact that I was raised by racist trump supporters and had to unlearn a lot of shit #which I was only able to do because I got out of my small town cult bubble and I was actually willing to listen to people #the problem comes when you see assholes and go wow look at those horrible unsympathetic assholes I could never be like them #by treating them as solely monstrous and something completely different from you you ignore your own ability to be monstrous #because you're not like them you're better #even the worst person is still a person and not some cartoon villain #and thinks that their actions are justified #and I'm always looking at people being assholes and going what makes you think this behavior is okay. you clearly think you're in the right #seriously what makes you think this. I want to know your exact thought process so I can stay far the hell away from it #I've been the asshole thinking I was completely in the right and I've seen people be absolutely horrible and justify it to themselves #so I'm always aware that this could be me. I could be being a total fucking dick. so I'm going to study you so I can avoid that #also the next person who says it was because they didn't learn empathy/were unempathetic gets slapped

[plusultraetc]

Saw the tags on the Toshinori post and do you have more to share?? Any insights? If so I’d welcome hearing them 😭 He really is so self-sacrificial and it hurts but it’s truly at the core of who he is

This has been sitting in my inbox for almost a week because I needed to make a futile effort at organizing my thoughts into something coherent--but this is as organized as they're going to get for now! Thank you so so much for the ask though bc I do love to yell about MHA <3

(Obligatory reminder that I'm watching this show in such a confusing order so if what I'm about to rant about has been addressed before and I'm harping on it unnecessarily I Am Sorry.)

(For anyone curious, this is the post btw)

SO. It feels relevant to mention that my sister and I were talking about All Might in the first place because we were talking about MHA Moments That Haunt Us. For me, it's the 'I am not here' sign hanging around the neck of the All Might statue in Kamino Ward after the Paranormal Liberation War. It literally lives in my brain rent-free 24/7 365 days a year, especially with the AM vs AFO fight being relatively fresh in my mind. The reversal of All Might's catchphrase and all it represents hurts, but to display it at the site of his 'last stand' in Kamino? That's brutal.

All Might vs All For One and how that rematch plays out is so so important to the story for so many reasons, but one of them is that the fight itself is a sacrifice. Toshinori gives everything he has, short of his life, to defeat All For One. He gives up his physical strength, his public image as the unbeatable Symbol of Peace, and, effectively his Quirk ("Goodbye, All For One. Goodbye, One For All" haunts my every waking moment, still!)

This battle is also the culmination of years of All Might's life and heroic philosophy (because Toshinori has been both practicing AND preaching self-sacrifice in the name of the greater good since we met him. It's what he thinks a hero does). Kamino is the sacrifice to end all sacrifices, if you will. Yes, he does get to walk away from the fight with AFO, but he walks away irrevocably different, almost unrecognizable. He's forced to totally change his focus and his mindset and his life. Everything he has given up is made literally visible in the deterioration of his body.

But most most importantly, All Might's sacrifice at Kamino was... all for nothing. Even if AM defeated him in that moment, All For One is free less than a year later. The world is in shambles. People are afraid, and their faith in heroes is crumbling. Heroes are afraid, and this time, they have no idealized symbol to rally behind. When Dostoevsky wrote "Your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing," he was talking about All Might btw.

Toshinori gave this fight (and his career, and being All Might) everything he had, and it still wasn't enough. He sacrificed so much of himself, and so much of how he perceived himself and his purpose, and he didn't even save the world. He just bought them time--and not much of it. I think that's why he's so desperate to keep fighting, no matter the cost, no matter what condition he's in--even 'quite literally half-dead.' He can't let Kamino be the Symbol of Peace's final stand, because Kamino was ultimately for nothing. Instead of saving the world, it has been reframed through the sign on the statue as All Might abandoning the world. And ever since then, he's been scrambling to prove that he is still here.

(There's also probably something here about Sir Nighteye telling him that he was going to die. Since Nighteye used his Quirk on him, Toshinori has been anticipating sacrificing his life for good. Knowing that his entire hero career is effectively a fight to the death has probably maximized his self-sacrificial tendencies.)

#ask #yagi toshinori #bnha all might #mha all might #love of my LIFE #i had more bullet points to include about all might's philosophy of self-sacrifice as both a hero and a teacher #but then i was writing random notes about all might as a product of hero society as opposed to a pillar of it and i felt like that one vide #of the old man going '90% of the time i have no idea what the hell i'm talking about' #it wasn't strictly relevant to this ask but maybe one day it will be it's own post bc toshinori messes me up when i think about him #for longer than 0.5 seconds #this is so word vomit i'm so sorry #liza blather #AND ANOTHER THING. a lot of the pros are self-sacrificial to an extreme (i made a web weave abt it) but all might is one of the few #who actually makes it his PHILOSOPHY. like he passes on the idea of setting yourself on fire to keep others warm as a Good Plan #which is NOT a criticism of him OR his fault it's what he LEARNED to do just like #i can't really blame the ua faculty for the sports fest as messed up as it was bc like. half of them are probably ua alumni. they #probably had their own sports festival. this is just like. not registering as abnormal to them. #okay now i will stop #one thing about me is if i'm not talking about kamino i'm talking about the sports festival #and on the off chance i'm not talking about either i'm talking about the joint training arc

[steelthroat]

Self-taught artist? Went to art school? Why not both?????

Artist who went/is going to art school, but teachers ignored them/are never in class/just care about their favorites so they kind of had to learn things by themself and then go crawling like a worm to the professors and ask "like this?" And they grunt and nod instead of giving constructive criticism.

#steel rambles #or you know #when the prof uses your project to experiment so when they do their own thing they know what to do because they watched you #I am this close to get my painting and slam it on my professor's head #I told the other lab's assistant what that asshole is making me do and she was horrified #HEY AT LEAST NOW I KNOW IT'S NOT ME BUT HIM! #ha! #I'm gonna cry so hard lol I could have just done the project the same way I did it last year #“BuT nOu” he wanted me to “tRy SoMeThInG nEw” #FUCK YOU???? if something worked once why the hell should I do something harder with worse results????? #but I'm gonna do it anyway now #and it's gonna look good #because fuck you I'm gonna do a good job no matter how much this asshole is gonna try and make things difficult #but I swear if he doesn't take the difficulty into account when he's gonna give me my grades... #you'll hear about me on the news I swear. #just a few months and I'm never gonna see him again #just a few months! #AAAAAAAAARGH