#i wrote the post to not be too shippy in romantic terms

[randomnumbers751650]

I finished Itto’s story quest and I have to say that he’s not as dumb as he seems. He’s not very smart, indeed, but I don’t think his IQ is as negative as some memes portray. In fact, I thought him to be quite quick-thinking and capable of discerning good from bad options under pressure, indispensable qualities for a good leader. The issue is that when confronted by problems that require puzzle-solving or more logical thinking, he’s really not good with that and will try to solve it banging his head against the problem until it’s solved – with very mixed results.

I really think that if Itto had a different education, he could’ve grown different. Grandma Oni taught him to be a gentleman, the basics of life, but not differential equations. He doesn’t seem the type that would sit his butt in class, but there are many stories of geniuses that were doing all kinds of crazy things to not stay in class, just like Itto would.

But, at the same time, it made me think of a rather sad AU: if she was swapped with Sara, getting to the Kujou clan. Takayuki would take advantage of Itto’s strength and use him to terrorize his rivals, depriving him from any form of love. General Itto would’ve be a terrible sight, scaring off anyone who happened to be in his way, but an ultimately sad man who was taught nothing but loyalty to ideas that just benefitted Takayuki’s shady deals. He’d be his attack dog (with no concept of stealth, that’d be Kuki’s role, General Itto’s invisible hand, but she tries to befriend him, but he’s so closed, still they both have absolute trust in each other). I feel sad just by imagining it.

But, as a tonal whiplash, Sara would be adopted by Grandma Tengu, who’d love her unconditionally. It’s easy to imagine her becoming a magical girl tengu, proclaiming sappy “In the name of justice, I will punish you!” speeches before taking down evil-doers with her incredible speed. She’d be a ray of sunshine in everyone’s lives, even if she’s a bit bird-brained (she’d fall for the glass trick, maybe that’s how she lost her vision during the decree). Her gang would have some romantic name like Holy Quintet (it used to be Holy Quartet, but she convinced disgraced detective trying to recover his honor Heizou to officially join it) and they’d do poses.

In the vision hunt decree, Itto and Sara would have a cat-and-mouse game (since her specialty is speed), but he’d get her vision eventually. So, they have their notice board war, with her wanting her vision back, challenging him many times. Even after her vision is returned, she still challenges him because she realized how sad he is and decided she’d be his friend, trying to have a fight that would be fun for an oni, since she learned from stories onis liked to fight.

#genshin impact #arataki itto #kujou sara #ittosara #i wrote the post to not be too shippy in romantic terms #but i like them together #in my opinion #mihoyo knew what they were doing #when they designed them #its just that romantic relationships between playable characters #is a risk #for any of them #anyway itto is really the best boy #and sara deserves more love #since she grew up with so little of it

[icykalisartblog]

Why Bilbo Baggins/Gandalf OTP

All right, here’s my big post on why Bilbo/Gandalf is OTP. This is half-joking but should include some genuinely valuable analysis! Much of this is cribbed from a paper I wrote in about queercoding in The Hobbit.

The Hobbit tarot deck has them as the Two of Cups, usually signifying soulmates and romantic attraction so this seems like a good image to start the post with... soulmate AU, anyone? XD

Without further ado:

Bilbo Baggins Big Queer

Usually when I see queer readings of Tolkien’s works, it’s centered on The Lord of the Rings, and for good reason. But I believe the most likely character to be queer in Tolkien’s work is in fact Bilbo Baggins. When reading Tolkien’s works with this idea in mind, Bilbo, Tolkien, and the world of Middle Earth take on a new dimension, especially The Hobbit.

Bilbo Baggins is an unusual Hobbit due to going off on his adventure to win back the Misty Mountains from the Dragon Smaug, but at the beginning of The Hobbit, it would seem that he should have represented an ideal wealthy landowning Hobbit in the eyes of his neighbors and family members.  The narrator of even states that the Baggineses were highly respected. However, we know from the very end of the book that Bilbo was not particularly well-liked even before he ever did anything exceptional, by the eagerness with which his family members auctioned off his belongings and presumed him to be dead. It is not just jealously over his wealth that caused the other Hobbits to dislike him—his mother was Belladonna Took, and the Took family was known for going on adventures, though the narrator explains that after marrying Bilbo’s father, she never did anything unexpected again. Interestingly, the narrator suggests that “...although he looked and behaved exactly like a second edition of his solid and comfortable father, got something a bit queer in his make-up from the Took side, something that only waited for a chance to come out.” Also from this page, we know that other families of Hobbits thought that one of the Tooks had taken a “fairy wife” and that Tooks would occasionally disappear, but that their relatives would try to quiet the rumors. If you’re going 👀 at queer make-up and a fairy being mentioned, you should. These terms were already being used as queer signifiers and pejoratives in the 30s when Tolkien wrote The Hobbit, plus Tolkien was well... a philologist. 

Enter Gandalf

So Bilbo’s Tookish side is being linked to his queerness, and the other Hobbits think the strange behavior of the Tooks might have been caused by one of them taking a “fairy wife.” Now, if you are very familiar with Tolkien’s works, you’ll know that the closest thing to a fairy that exists in that world is probably what Gandalf is—a spirit known as a Maia, which all the Wizards are. Maiar (that’s the plural) are usually conceived of by critics as angelic beings because they serve the gods and Abrahamic God equivalents, but they have fairy-like qualities as well. And Gandalf is going to serve as the catalyst who brings out Bilbo’s, well, queer side. 

When Gandalf arrives in The Hobbit and introduces himself, Bilbo simultaneously gushes and rants about him, and gives special importance to Gandalf’s fireworks: “They used to go up like lilies and snapdragons and laburnums of fire and hang in the twilight all evening!” he says, and then the narrator remarks, “You will notice already that Mr Baggins was not quite so prosy as he liked to believe, also that he was very fond of flowers,” as if Bilbo’s secret desire to be unique and his love of flowers were of close to equal importance. Gandalf mentions that for the sake of the Old Took and “poor Belladonna” he will take Bilbo on an adventure. The only reason we are given for Belladonna Took being unfortunate in any way is that she was somehow repressed after being married. A critique of heteronormativity?

Bilbo turns Gandalf away and denies his not-so-well-hidden desire for an adventure but invites Gandalf to come have tea with him the next day, an action Bilbo himself does not understand. In fact, the Bilbo is so shaken by the invitation he himself gave that he thought “a drink of something would do him good after his fright,” despite this scene taking place right after breakfast . Gandalf is left standing outside of Bilbo’s house, laughing. He takes the “spike of his staff” (...!) and draws a “queer sign” (...!!!) on Bilbo’s door.

I think it’s worth noting that in Tolkien’s unfinished writings, Gandalf initially didn’t want to go to Middle-Earth. He feared Sauron and thought of himself as too weak to be a proper emissary, but that’s exactly why Gandalf was the right Maia for the job of protecting Middle-Earth. Gandalf’s origin was thus very much the same as Bilbo’s... he’s been through all of this reluctance, too. 

The Two Together

After Bilbo’s adventure, he is ostracized, and the beginning of The Lord of the Rings makes it clear that he had “no close friends” among Hobbits, and that the only ones who appreciated him were young children who would not understand how he was non-normative, and poor Hobbits to whom Bilbo gave money. In fact, the narrative begins with an argument between the Gaffer and Mr. Sandyman about Bilbo’s and Frodo’s “queerness,” which includes Bilbo’s adoption of an heir as opposed to having children biologically. With a queer reading in mind, Bilbo’s request that Gandalf take care of Frodo makes Bilbo and Gandalf appear to be caregivers of an adopted heir.

The text that I feel makes it hard to deny that Bilbo Baggins is queer is a version of “The Quest for Erebor,” an unfinished account from Gandalf that gives his perspective on the journey of The Hobbit. “The Quest for Erebor” was written at the same time that Tolkien was working on The Lord of the Rings, but was not ultimately included as part of the narrative (only an abridged version was included in the appendixes of The Lord of the Rings). I will quote Gandalf’s words from the unabridged version, regarding his choosing Bilbo for the quest (emphasis mine):

I learned that he had never married. I thought that odd though I guessed why it was; and the reason that I guessed was not that most of the Hobbits gave me: that he had early been left very well off and his own master. No, I guessed that he wanted to remain 'unattached' for some reason deep down which he did not understand himself - or would not acknowledge, for it alarmed him. He wanted, all the same, to be free to go when the chance came, or he had made up his courage. I remembered how he used to pester me with questions when he was a youngster about the Hobbits that had occasionally 'gone off,' as they said in the Shire.

As one can see from this passage, Gandalf, who has a very close relationship to Bilbo, does not believe what would be the obvious explanation for Bilbo’s remaining a bachelor—that he was a wealthy landowner, and thus did not need to. Rather, Gandalf believed that it was Bilbo’s latent desire for adventure that led to his never marrying. As I have pointed out, the call to adventure is connected to queerness. Gandalf also quotes other Hobbits as referring to those who had adventures as having “gone off.” To “go off” obviously indicates leaving the Shire to go somewhere else, but this phrase could also mean exploding (and fireworks, something that Bilbo remembered Gandalf for, go off), or to go bad—in the sense of food rotting or becoming moldy and inedible.

I think it’s also worth pointing out that Gandalf felt supernaturally compelled to bring Bilbo along on the quest. It’s likely that this was the Tolkien equivalent of Abrahamic God intervening in the events of Middle-Earth—something that rarely happens! The relationship between Gandalf and Bilbo is really important!

All of the points I have made signify that Bilbo Baggins’s story is applicable to the experiences of queer people, and his relationship with Gandalf suggests that Bilbo himself in fact has a queer romantic orientation—that he is queer in more than the sense of being non-normative due to going on a quest to retake Erebor. The friendship between Gandalf and Bilbo develops throughout The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings, as Bilbo learns to trust and appreciate both Gandalf and his own adventurous side, and Gandalf learns more about kindness and true strength from Bilbo, Gandalf visits Bilbo many times afterward. Finally, they both care for Frodo and leave for the West together. Their friendship is heartwarming, and I would argue that this queer reading of it may be even more so—while there is an enormous age difference between these two characters (Bilbo is fifty-one at the start of The Hobbit, Gandalf is thousands of years old), Gandalf treats Bilbo like an equal and they both teach each other a lot (and Gandalf does not act like he is thousands-of-years old, he lost a lot of his innate knowledge and power when he was sent to Middle-Earth, after all).

Other Details

Close to the end of The Hobbit, after they retake Erebor from Smaug, Bilbo and Gandalf travel together, just the two of them, and the narrator doesn’t elaborate on this. This sounds like peak shipping and adventure fanfic fuel to me! 

I’m not a fan of The Hobbit films, but they do contain some great shippy moments with the two characters. There’s some hilarious snarking, like this exchange: 

BILBO: Are there any?

GANDALF: What?

BILBO: Other wizards?

GANDALF: There are five of us. The greatest of our order is Saruman the White. And then there are the two Blue Wizards... you know, I've quite forgotten their names.

BILBO: And the fifth?

GANDALF: Well, that would be Radagast the Brown.

BILBO: Is he a great wizard, or is he more like you?

And then Gandalf is like 😮 XD

There’s also a really heartwarming moment where Galadriel asks Gandalf why he chose Bilbo: 

GALADRIEL: Mithrandir? Why the Halfling?

GANDALF: I don't know. Saruman believes that it is only great power that can hold evil in check. But that is not what I have found. I've found it is the small things, everyday deeds of ordinary folk that keeps the darkness at bay. Simple acts of kindness and love. Why Bilbo Baggins? Perhaps it is because I am afraid, and he gives me courage.

I remember there being other movie-only sweet moments too, but it’s been a long time since I’ve watched them!

#bilbo baggins #gandalf #the hobbit #the lord of the rings #queercoding #I need an analysis/meta tag

[radbutsafe]

ALL FUCKIN 35 OF THEM SKLNWESDJFPXO

I SHOULDVE EXPECTED THIS FROM YOU

1. From one to five stars, how would you rate your writing? (No downplaying yourself!)

A three! I think I’m mid range cause I ain’t terrible but there is still shit I gotta improve and grow in my writing

2. Why do you write fanfiction?

to manifest what canon won’t give me and to write more! (though yes it is mainly about the smooching and the— I’ll stop there LOL)

3. What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works?

Hm! My weird research details? I’m that “fun fact, did you know...” in my fics sometimes LOL! I plan on giving a penthouse for erina in a fic and I went through penthouse listings in Japan for floor layouts and locations💀 my research gives me inspo and depth to stuff I think I lack in comparison to others sometimes.

4. Are there any writers that inspire you?

In terms of fellow fic writers, one of them I can’t name here but she’s an inspiration with her exceptional gift for prose period and her lovely skill at comedy! I want to be as funny as her when I write, I love her ironic situational humor. Other fic writers are @takoyakitenchou, @royaldragonsevgisi15 who I always love sharing ideas with and motivate me to create more! For non-fic writers it would be V.E. Schwab, Leigh Bardugo, Oda, and Horikoshi! The last two may be mangaka, however they are writers as well to create their stories! The depth these creators have given their worlds and interesting characters theyve given life to are all what I aspire to be like!

5. What’s the fic you’re most proud of?

so far uh?? hm everything I’m currently writing are wips lol!! im proud of my wip that has been nicknamed ‘soma panics’ that is a multi-chapter fic that spans like probs 20 plus chapters maybe

6. What element of writing do you find comes easily?

dialogue! it’s so much fun! and character thoughts. I’ve said to people I may be better suited for script writing

7. What element of writing do you struggle with most?

I think it’s description, of like setting and showing action. also an expansion of my vocabulary LOL

8. Which character(s) do you find easiest to write?

erina! I think it’s because canon has shown us many of her different faces and range of emotion.

9. Which character(s) do you find most difficult to write?

SOMA!! chill ass mofo whos more carefree compared to the common shonen protagonist! for other shokugeki characters I’m not sure just yet because I haven’t flexed my fingers enough for the rest of them.

10. What’s your favorite genre to write for?

I guess I should say romance cause that’s what I mostly write LOL!

11. Who or what do you find yourself writing about most?

sorina and I try to get them to smooch eventually KEK and yeah it’s..usually romantic fluff lmao

12. Tell us about a WIP you’re excited about.

HONESTLY ALL OF THEM but “soma panics” is my brain child

13. First fandom you ever wrote for?

pretty sure it’s digimon....

14. What’s your favorite fandom to write for?

currently shokugeki no soma!!!!

15. What’s the weirdest fandom you’ve ever written for?

uhhhh I guess SNS? LMAO fandoms...all have their quirks to them.

16. Any guilty pleasure trope(s)?

characters cuddling!!!! or getting the urge to smooch!!!!

17. A trope you’ll never, ever write for.

unrequited love GOOD FUCKIN BYEEEEEE

18. Wildest fic you’ve ever written?

I have plot ideas thst can be wild potentially but so far nothing fits this criteria so far that I actually have written.

19. Do you prefer canon-compliant, AUs, or something in-between?

depends on the fandom, but if written well, all of it!

20. Gen fic or shippy stuff?

shippy 100% like I said I like smoochin

21. Favorite pairing to write for? (platonic or romantic!)

romantic is...*drumroll* SORINA! platonic, soutaku and erina and alice!

22. Do you listen to anything while you write?

Sometimes! There are times songs will be on loop and times I just shuffle a playlist. and if I’m writing in random bursts it’ll be with no music but it really does depend lmao I think music is when I’m forcing myself to write?

23. Do you prefer prompts and challenges, or completely independent ideas?

completely independent ideas, I’ve realized in the past prompts shoot me in the foot often unless I luckily figure something out. but I’m often driven by my own sporadic self interest with shitty ping ponging attention

24. One-shots or multi-chaptered works?

multi-chap I guess cause I can post without being finished LOLLL but tbh can I really answer? I haven’t finished anything.....

25. Have you ever daydreamed about side adventures/spin-offs from your fic? Tell us about them!

I can’t answer this question imo because I haven’t finished a fic yet so technically stuff could all fit in the one fic?

26. Is there anything you’ve wanted to write, but you’ve been too scared to try?

MYSTERY AND CRIME! I love the genre and I have plot ideas once a blue moon but I can’t dive in because I want to make details that work and reduce plot holes where suspension of disbelief isn’t as needed. I need to study it more (I need to study all the details for any of my fics imo to be confident sometimes LOL)

27. What’s the nicest comment you’ve ever received?

I don’t think I can say one comment was the nicest because I’ve gotten comments that have given me quite the smiles to my face many times! I know this is a cop out but it’s true!

IS WHAT I WAS GONNA SAY UNTIL REINA SENT ME THE FOLLOWING ON DISCORD LIKE TWENTY MINS AGO:

and also rad. i am never this vocal about my emotions like EVER but this needs to be said your fics are obviously far from perfect, as are mine and everyone else's. but the thing about your works is that they're so well-sanded that it's impossible to find any rough edges or faults in them in terms of cohesion to a plot. your cast is never OOC and the amount of effort you devote to developing your takes on the characters as accurately as possible is unimaginably awe-inspiring.

BITCH I WANNA CRY 😭

28. How well do you handle criticism when it comes to your writing?

I’d like to believe I take it often well to try and improve because that’s always my goal. if someone is rude lol that’s not constructive snd is unhelpful. If I disagree with criticism I’ll explain why !

29. Have you ever gone outside of your comfort zone for a fic? How did it turn out?

Not yet, but I have some plot ideas I think will let me test this.

30. Tooth-rotting fluff or merciless angst?

F L U F F.

31. Do you have any OCs? Tell us about them!

elliott fuji, a japanese-american award winning photographer who is erina’s boyfriend in ‘soma panics’ which..causes soma’s panic LOL he’s 30 with slightly wavy black hair. I still haven’t pinpointed his personality just yet...he kind of humble brags for sure an artsy fucker and flirts maybe I’ll make him a lil shy though. he teaches sometimes, and becomes an adjunct photography professor in Tokyo so he can be with erina.

32. Summarize a random fic of yours in 10 words or less.

a cook is unfashionably late in realizing his feelings.

33. Is there anything you wish your audience knew about your writing or writing process?

I am a slow. so slow. motivation who is she? I also write out of order, unfortunately a bit too often.

34. Copy and paste an excerpt you’re particularly fond of.

this should be for the fic ‘soma panics’ it’s either megumi or satoshi talkin to him rn, I’m leaning towards satoshi

“You thought she would always wait for you, didn’t you Soma-kun? To always welcome you home.”

Soma drags his palms down his face and groans. He doesn’t like this at all. He doesn’t shy from confrontation but this is a whole different ballgame. Soma doesn’t play any ball.

“I guess..?” Is his reply, because he thinks he isn’t sure how to answer that.

“You guess?”

Just being questioned again is enough to crack Soma’s pathetic facade as if it was dropped chinaware and he lets out the longest sigh.

“No.”

Coming home means coming home to Nakiri Erina too.

Nakiri Erina is his forever.

this is @takoyakitenchou’s excerpt she’s most proud of that I’ve written, which is also from you guessed it, the long fic soma panics

SOMA: I am, I mean I will be, I swear I will always come home to you, not spend as much time abroad, once I’m done with work I’ll come right back. I’ll make sure to message you. Nakiri, I’m in love you with you. Maybe for a really long time. You know how I say I dedicate my food to you? My dad—my dad said that the key to become a good chef is to find someone to dedicate your cooking to. A special someone. For my dad it was my mom, you know? For me it’s...

(this is a good piece of dialogue tbh so I am also proud of this)

35. Ramble about any fic-related thing you want!

I’ve mentioned it throughout this but the WIP I’ve nicknamed ‘soma panics’ is something I’m super excited to write, but it’s going on slowly...and almost completely out of order. out of all of my writing it showed off that particular habit of mine, along with “what is this, a shoujo manga?!” though the latter is currently being written chronologically now that I’ve posted chapter one and is pretty solid in direction. it was originally supposed to be a one shot but I got impatient and wanted to post at least something for the sorina / soueri fandom.

however, because ‘soma panics’ (I won’t call it that LOL) is my baby I want to keep true to my rule of refusing to post it until I have a draft of the entire fic finished and I’m satisfied with the main points pretty much. due to my writing out of order, I’m worried I’ll change my mind about scenes or want to reflect things in earlier chapters for later ones etc etc

I joined the SnS fandom extremely late, as season five was airing. I was a fan of the manga five years ago and dropped it because I forgot to check for updates when I caught up 😔 I really want to bang out the different fics and aus for sorina that I have before the fandom fizzles out entirely but tbh I’m writing for myself, I’m manifesting what I want to see and I’ll just share it with all my friends to read if no one else will. cause I’m slow broski I dunno what writing fast even is like LMAO I do really want to write faster though, so I can contribute more and let the words free from the discord dms....

#ask meme #ask rad shit #writing #writing by rad #fanfic #reina girl u put me thru it I swear lol #thank u for sending!! #ur amazing!!!!

[lizardrosen]

@eirenical also asked "..and omg is it terrible to want to know about literally all your Les Mis, Narnia, and Star Wars WiPs?? Because I kind of want to know about all of them. XD" on my wip post

Les Mis

SINGING THE SONG OF ANGRY MEN is just my catch-all les mis doc from before I transferred everything from Word to Scrivener, meaning everything in there is before reading the book. I was probably really unfair to Cosette because i thought of her as competition for Eponine's happiness. Anyway, have a e/R fic i wrote based purely on dash osmosis, and complete with misspellings!

resurrection? was just a really strong image i had to write out and was always curious what the larger story would be. Basically Grantaire is smiling soppily at Enjolras and then thinks "That was before they died" and is sad and thoughtful about The Ideal.

Gray Is Okay - turns out I've already posted this one on tumblr! Grantaire and Enjolras talk about pronouns and convictions and uncertainty!

brietbart online - short fic where Enjolras gets himself worked up over right wing newspapers because “It’s good to know how the enemy thinks” and Grantaire helps him calm down. (Pretty sure this one was inspired by someone being Very Extremely Wrong about one of my favorite episodes of star trek, and then I noticed the source) This wasn't very good writing and it wasn't really going anywhere, so I'm never going to post it.

“Please Come Inside” - Enjolras is greyromantic and mostly he just loves all his friends, but he has a queerplatonic relationship with Courfeyrac which slowly develops into (possibly?) romantic attraction, and he's very confused and upset by this internal change and has to Process.

from my vague notes:

at some point they end up at a chinese restaurant because courfeyrac calls it "the ultimate comfort food" enjolras always makes a token protest when they go, but he secretly loves it just as much or more because salty foods are his weakness "we don't need to change anything we're doing," courfeyrac says as he stabs at an egg roll with a single chopstick, "or we can. Uh, your choice. But no matter what I won't be ashamed of you, and i'll trust that you aren't ashamed of me." (courfeyrac is not aro-spec, but he did introduce enjolras to the term) and they talk about their feelings and enjolras's main fear, besides that he's not aromantic at all, is that he'll be forcing courfeyrac into the closet, because even if whatever-he's-feeling is close to what someone else might call romantic, he still Can Not bear to have himself called a boyfriend courfeyrac mostly just wants enjolras to be comfortable, and he's willing to take whatever form their relationship eventually comes

Friendlier Skies - this one's my les mis space au, with a bunch of shorter stories that all fit into the same solar system. One of my favorite elements is that the Gorbeau Building has been remixed into a ship that accepts literally anyone as passengers with no questions asked.

And the Narnia and Star Wars are going under a cut!

Narnia

Gallivanters is an AU where instead of being from Narnia, Caspian is just a Spanish transfer student at the boarding school where Edmund and Peter are, and they have a bunch of nerdy adventures. I'm pretty sure Caspian/Peter was endgame in my head, but i never got that far.

once a king or queen was just my catch-all Narnia doc. Lots of Edmund, lots of Susan, and one ficlet where Susan Pevensie and Carrie White talk about the family they've lost and the girls they don't need to be anymore. I swear I remember writing a lot of Jill and Eustace too, but it must have gotten lost when transferring computers.

Theory of Narnia - technically not a WIP anymore, but I used the plot of Narnia to write an essay explaining different Theory of Knowledge concepts for extra credit in high school. It had footnotes and everything!

To Fill Different Lives was a passion project for several years! It was supposed to be for a fic exchange in 2010 but it got too big for me and I had to drop out. It's Jadis after the Last Battle, recounting her history to no one because there's no one left. Many things about it make me cringe looking back at it, but I still looove this opening:

I have lived for a long time, long enough to fill several different lives. Looking back, I begin to realize just how similar all of these lives have been. Each time, I had power, but needed more. Each time, I chose a color and assumed it as a part of my identity. And each time, there was a boy.

Star Wars

There Will Be Light - oops, I already posted this one on tumblr too! Luke has bad dreams after Obi-Wan is killed, and Han comforts him. Not meant to be shippy but it definitely could be!

Qui-Gon lives (and somehow everything is worse??) - never got past the "vague chatting" stage, but our conversation started with this

lizardrosen: you know how qui-gon tells padme something like "i can only defend you, i can't fight a war for you" ? and then the jedi order DOES fight a war for the republic eirenical: YES. lizardrosen: how *pissed* would he have been if he'd lived to find out about kamino and the clones and all of that eirenical: *nodnodnod* I think about that a lot, actually. About how Qui-Gon would have dealt with the war. Somehow, I think it would have either broken him completely... or broken his compassion for others. AND I'M NOT SURE WHICH WOULD BE WORSE.

and then we talked about how qui-gon and obi-wan and anakin are a really solid trio for a long time, so it takes a long time to break qui-gon's compassion, but it happens hard, and "obi-wan and anakin are never quite able to be the dynamic duo; they'll always be three minus one but they try, they try so HARD"

Obi-Wan after Revenge of the Sith is just what it says on the tin. He's sad and alone and trying to connect to Qui-Gon, but not quite ready for him even when he does finally show up. This one also has a really good opening paragraph!

Everyone Obi-Wan loves is taller than him. Everyone he has loved? Used to love? No, he loves them still, even those gone from the world, or out of his grasp. He would have grown to love Luke and Leia too, tiny as they are, if given half the chance, which is exactly why he cannot allow himself to take that chance.

#eirenical #les mis #narnia #star wars #my writing #friendship is great!

[highladyluck]

Hi! Inspired by your last post, do you have any ships involving Forsaken?

Hi! I'm so thrilled to get a WoT anon ask omg ^_^ I feel like I’ve hit the big time!

My first instinct is to say I don't particularly ship any of the Forsaken with each other; I think they're all a little too self-involved for that, and would avoid potentially being vulnerable around their asshole coworkers.

That said, I guess Graendal/Aran'gar is sort of canon, and could be parsed as 'Fake Dating' which I normally love, but I have real difficulty seeing any kind of genuine affection in it, or even the possibility of genuine affection later developing. There also isn't enough contrast between their approaches or motivation for a really interesting antagonistic relationship- they don't have anything to challenge each other with. Until I read some fandom wikis I had no idea what Balthamel even did in the AoL. (They both focused on people, with Graendal manipulating individuals and Balthamel researching cultures.) I like some crunchy contrasts in my enemies to lovers, and Aran'gar is basically just a less interesting/more annoying Graendal to me. However, Graendal and Aran'gar would absolutely both fuck their clones and can probably only care for themselves, so maybe there is something real about the relationship?

I should also make the caveat that I'm not sure if 'this is interesting to think about', which is how I feel about most Forsaken/protagonist ships, really counts as 'shipping'. I'm not emotionally invested in the Forsakens’ romantic relationships the way I am in Mat/Tuon, and probably wouldn't go seeking out that content in the same way. But I do love a good crackship (I wrote a drabble with a Forsaken crackship back in the day), and I like hearing people's ideas about how the character dynamics between protagonists and antagonists could be explored.

In terms of relationships I've thought about, I think it would add an extra measure of drama if Demandred wasn't just jealous of Lews Therin but also was attracted to him- and hated both himself and Lews Therin for it. @moghedien made the absolutely classic point about "the homoerotic subtext between Moghedien and every woman who is mean to her" and while I wouldn't know how to write it, I would absolutely read some frustrated (in more senses than one) Moghedien thinking about all of the hot women who have wronged her. In terms of stuff not covered in the Forsaken Ratings post, @veliseraptor's post war blues is a fascinating look at mutual Moridin/Min/Rand that really builds on the strangely functional working relationship Moridin and Rand already have, and also lets Min talk philosophy with someone who likes it just as much as she does. I don't know how much else is out there that's like that, but I'd 100% read more of it.

In general if you want really interesting Forsaken content (not necessarily shippy, but sometimes) a lot of the things I found memorable and interesting appear to have been gifts for Tedronai on A03. Hopefully some part of this answers your question, happy to do a followup though if it didn't!

[galaxywhale-moved]

somebody sent me Marvel for this fandom ask thing and tumblr mobile is the worst at notifying you when you get a message so it’s been like 3 days and now the message has disappeared?? i can’t find it anywhere?? i don’t think i queued it, its not in my drafts, its not in my inbox, it’s not posted on my blog as far as I can tell so thanks tumblr

and thank you anon for sending it!!!

ANYWAY

Favorite Male Character

It used to be Captain America but then the endgame bullshit happened so maybe Thor? mostly bc Chris Hemsworth is hilarious tbh and based entirely off Ragnarok onwards. Spider-Man has also been a fave since I was like 15 but I don’t wanna say him bc far from home is out in like 2 days and i don’t wanna be like “I love spider-man” and then have that completely change lol

(I still love u though steve <3 )

Favorite Female Character

HMMMM if we’re talking MCU Marvel, probably Valkyrie or Captain Marvel, but a large part of that is bc i am Gay. I don’t know a heeeap about Marvel as in the comics but I do love my glowy floaty alien lesbian Karolina Dean from Runaways (the comics, I’ve only watched part of the show so idk if I love her there yet or not) and America Chavez from 

Least Favorite Character

Probably Vision. I literally do not care about him at all tbh, I find him kind of annoying and I think part of it is bc he falls into the uncanny valley zone to me where he’s....human but not??

Favorite Ship

I’m not a huuuugely shippy person tbh (at least with Marvel) but probably Steve Rogers x Sam Wilson/Captain America x Falcon (or maybe even Captain America x Captain America I guess now??). Partly bc I’m still living in the Winter Soldier lol. And tbh I don’t...care if that’s a romantic ship or a friendly one (although if it’s friendly it’s definitely a ‘we were a thing but it didn’t work so now we’re just bffs thing). Steve x Bucky is cute but wouldn’t survive romantically after everything I don’t think. 

I also just want a f/f ship tbh, a canon one, but also.......not bc men are Trash and can you even imagine ew. Maria x Carol I guess kind of fits but it feels kind of queerbaity (especially in the context of the rest of the mcu)

Favorite Friendship

I definitely should have read this first before I wrote the previous answer lol

Steve/Sam/Bucky definitely, Maria and Carol, Rocket and Groot, Peter and Ned too (although that may just be bc I’m 2/3 of the way though Homecoming rn)

There are definitely others but I suck at remembering things unless I’m reminded of them

Favorite Quote

hmmmm i suck at remembering these too

" "When you can do the things that I can, but you don't, and then the bad things happen, they happen because of you." 

is one i definitely like though, it seems very in character for spiderman and i feel like it highlights the issues with complacency and “neutrality”, not taking action is still political

 “I have nothing to prove to you” is also A+

Worst Character Death (if any)

Black Widow bc it felt like.....it could  have been done so well but instead she was just the disposable one

“This Made Me So Happy You Have No Idea” Moment

Steve Rogers wielding mjolnir in Endgame, definitely. Of course my Captain is worthy <3 (although after that ending...) 

Saddest Moment

The only sad moment I can think of is when Peter realises Yondu dies in GotG2 and the ending where they all turn up to farewell him

Favorite Location

I can’t really think of any locations lol 

Wakanda is pretty cool, visually but also in terms of design and culture and how it’s shown

[tenebraetrash17]

So I haven't played ffxv yet, but I saw your Ravus and Lightning hcs so I had to figure out who my qween was being shipped with and HOT DAMNNNN! I wanna play now lolol! I was originally a Lightis/SnowRai shipper, but your hcs (and that guy) got me thinking and I was wondering if you could write up some more? Mainly just to see what they would be like in a shippy sense and whether or not I should ship

HELLO ANON! So sorry for getting to your request so late! Normally I’m faster, but I wanted to get this just right! I hope I did a good job! And sorry again for the wait!

I kinda wrote this in an AU where Ravus did survive, after being purged or something, but he still had remnants of the Scourge that affected him. I mean, it’s clearly an AU because either Ravus is in XIII or Lightning is in XV !

Raire Headcannons: NSFW UNDER THE CUT!! 

They were originally reluctant to date since it seems like anyone they’ve grown close to in the past has often met with a terrible fate.

When they finally do decide to get into a relationship, they never actually went out, other than perhaps a lunch or two, but nothing seemed romantic about it. Mainly because they didn’t know what to do. Ravus was too awkward to try and hold her hand and Lightning didn’t know if she should sit close to him or not.

Evidently the date worked though, since they did it again.

After they grew comfortable with each other, Ravus actually manned up and held her hand, much to the surprise of Lightning. It was a quiet moment so the sudden contact came out of nowhere. It was also that night she decided to kiss his cheek and turned so abruptly afterwards, she could get whiplash. It was to hide her blushing face, the only problem was is that she didn’t notice Ravus turning a bright crimson.

They date more at home than out, they say it’s because Lightning lives by a beach and Ravus in a palace so they have no need to go anywhere since they basically already live like kings or in paradise. The truth of the matter is that they’re both antisocial and they don’t want to hear anyone say “Drinks for the lovely couple?” 

Their dates consist often of just sitting outside for a picnic, watching stars or attempting a trip to the beach, which is rare since Ravus burns quicker than a stick next to fire. Eventually they wind up on the couch talking about menial things, they start out 3 feet apart but eventually Lightning ends up on top of Ravus as they snuggle and they still don’t know how that happens.

Once he is settled in, Ravus is normally the one to initiate physical contact in terms of hugging and kissing, which range from chaste sweet ones to full on pinned down make outs. Lightning always insists that its only because he’s bigger than her that that happens.

SPEAKING OF SIZE! Ravus can lift Lightning over his head and is amused that she only comes up to his chest, which every now and then she’ll halfheartedly punch him in as her forehead also rests against it if she’s annoyed. Lightning doesn’t let the size factor get to her, she’s used to it and grew accustomed to standing on her tiptoes to give him a kiss. But what does sometimes bug her is when people make comments that her boyfriend has bigger breasts than her. Normally she wouldn’t be bothered, but she did get oddly aware of his assets.

Oh well. They make a good pillow, as you can often see Lightning nestled into Ravus’ chest if they take a nap together.

If Ravus has a rough day at work and Lightning happens to be over since they do spend the night with each other every now and then, she’s often not even greeted with a hello or any warning as Ravus just coils his arms and pulls her close before he kisses her until she’s breathless and then some. It was shocking at first but Lightning eventually grew to be used to it, and actually enjoys it now. And she thinks it’s much better than Ravus trying to break himself and the equipment in the training hall.

They’ve sparred quite a lot and Noctis often comments that’s probably why they rarely get into major fights because they “beat the crap out of each other every Tuesday.” Although they did originally try to play nice until they learned the other could take it.

Ravus has done Lightning’s hair in the Tenebraen Style. Don’t ask how or why, he managed to get her to stay still long enough and talk her into it so props to him.

Ravus isn’t afraid to go ahead and secretly buy things to give Lightning. At one point, she woke up to find a necklace on her pillow with no explanation at all, it was a pretty thing as well, a lightning bolt pendant with a pink to purple hue to to crystal. The chain was pure silver to keep with the tradition of being ‘holy’ as the Oracle line does. But during his travels in Duscae, Ravus got some of the stones from the landmarks created by Ramuh’s lightning, which would be what lined the pendant.

Ravus and Lightning both aren’t too into PDA and in fact, avoid it. The most you’ll see them do in public is holding hands, leaning against one another on benches, Lightning holding onto Ravus’ arm and, if he’s feeling bold, Ravus will gently kiss Lightning, but it’s a small one so nothing spicy. 

That’sforlaterintherelationship.

Both were soldiers, both are VERY prone to PTSD attacks, and in those moments Ravus and Lightning rely heavily on each other for comfort, often times be it silence, depending on who was affected they are most likely going to have their head on the others shoulder or chest. These moments are more often than not, quiet, simply not talking unless the person suffering speaks or needs to say something. They both make pretty good listeners, which most found surprising.

It’s not uncommon to see Ravus giving Lightning a spoon/forkful of something at home, especially if he made it himself. He normally looks to her approval when it comes to his baking.

Ravus calls Lightning affectionately his “angel” or “princess.” Although the angel one strikes a bit too close to home since he’s still painfully aware of the darkness residing in him, so he finds irony in their relationship that is the age old saying of an angel falling for a demon. 

Since Ravus does still have the scourge residing in him, Lightning now keeps it at bay as one day out of the month she purges his soul, as they noticed it was the only thing that worked when he was doubled over and coughing up scourge.

The most worrying factor for them is when they’re separated on that day, while it’s rare, it has happened and Lightning had to get to Niflheim as fast as possible.

About five months into the relationship Ravus got Lightning a promise ring that he put on a necklace as an afterthought since he recalled how Serah and Snow has those and he thought perhaps that was tradition in her world. 

The promise ring was actually his mother’s engagement ring, but Lightning didn’t learn anything of it until Lunafreya saw it and knew what happened before Lightning said a word. 

Ravus and Lightning only got a promise ring instead of actually getting engaged simply because it’s hard because of their work, although they both look forward to when they can actually be married.

Oddly enough, Ravus insisted that they wait until they were both ready for the chance of pregnancy happening before having sex. Since he knew protection of any kind could never be 100% so he wanted them to be prepared for anything. Lightning was taken aback but she knew that since they both had responsibilities and a child would be something they would need to commit to.

While they both want to wait to do anything, they have had more than a few heated makeout sessions on the couch that had ended in Ravus losing his shirt entirely while his hands were up Lightning’s. When they noticed them becoming more frequent, they decided something had to be done, especially since Lightning seemed to be more than frustrated with Ravus’ chastity pact after awhile and began initiating things with less than pure thoughts going through her mind. Although one day Lightning woke up earlier than Ravus and when she moved closer to him because it was cold she felt something and upon inspection she was keenly aware of their difference in size once more and stopped trying to get him to give into her advances….at least for awhile. Imagining what she did and what kind of pain it would cause was enough to do that.

When she spoke with Ravus about it and accused him of dreaming of something, he began rapidly exclaiming how that can be usual in the morning.

Ravus still came up with a way to keep Lightning satisfied, he decided that while they wouldn’t go all the way, he still wanted her to feel good. And Lightning found out he was surprisingly commanding lover, as Ravus would often resort to pinning her hands above her head as he would mockingly edge her with his fingers and their slow, languid movements. However there was always some hint of adoration and uncertainty, no matter how dominating and seductive he tried to be.

Lightning found out that Ravus has a very positive reaction to her running her fingers through his hair, as it causes him to purr and whatever he does becomes far more generous than before. Lightning would also never admit it, but she also loves to watch when Ravus goes down on her, there’s an almost predatory look in his eyes, although her eyes often close more quickly than she likes, after he helps her ride out her orgasm, he manages to draw himself up in a more regal manner than normal, and has a tendency to lick her juices from his face and fingers in a probably unintentional seductive manner. That, or it’s the post-orgasm haze she’s in, as Lightning also found out he liked to make sure she had multiple.

When they do finally decide to go all the way, it’s when they’re even more certain that they have a future together and they are completely ready for it. It plays out as they normally do, with Ravus wanting to do most of the work and see “his princess” in such a state of disarray because of him and hear his name falling from her lips. However, once it comes to the actual act of intimacy, Lightning has to basically coax him into it by insisting she’s ready since he won’t stop asking. And even though it’s obvious his body is, his mind clearly isn’t and it takes Lightning pulling him into a kiss to get him to even enter her. What they weren’t prepared for was how Lightning was not expecting the coming pain, she had heard stories from Lunafreya and Serah and considered herself to be pretty tolerant of pain, so both Ravus and she were taken aback when tears ran down her face and she made a sound that neither were accustomed to, making Ravus panic and ask if they needed to stop, although Lightning only replied that he should just keep going, just slowly. Once Ravus was fully inside of her, he did his best to gently kiss and distract her from the pain while she got adjusted, only moving when she gave him to ok and going faster when she asked.

Ravus has a tendency to top more often than Lightning, simply because he just likes to see her getting pleasure rather than him, although it’s not uncommon for Lightning to grab him by the coat, give him a rough kiss and push him to the bed, more than ready to take charge, sometimes she’ll go as far to tie his hands to the bed, especially since it’s a way for revenge since he always restrains her.

Weirdest places they’ve done it? Ravus’ office, a beach cove that is pretty quiet for the most part, the Niflheim meeting room, of all places, and an airship.

When Lightning does become pregnant, which is of little surprise to no one since they both aren’t big on condoms or protection of any sort since it “kills the mood”, Ravus becomes the most doting person in the world and will fall over himself trying to ensure her comfort. Lightning doesn’t at times, but often she’ll just say she needs alone time, it’s a good thing he listens. Although one thing he refuses to do is (as he puts it) make love to her. He doesn’t want to be too rough and hurt the baby, since he is afraid it could happen, so it’s back to what they were doing before being fully intimate.

Take two protective older siblings, put ‘em in a relationship, make ‘em bang, have a baby be the end result. These two are the most nurturing parents you would ever see. The soldier side making them good with discipline while their heavy maternal instincts, a side effect from raising their siblings, lead to them caring and protecting that child fiercely.

I hope this did it for ya Anon!! ^_^ I had wayyyy too much fun writing it, and it kinda ended up as more like paragraphs than quick headcannons…whoops. Sorry again for getting to this late!

Why did I make the NSFW ones so long, they were more like fic bits?? This is the first time I’ve written NSFW too??? ARE YOU OK ME?

#ravus nox fleuret #ravus #lightning farron #lightning #claire farron #Raire #Ravus X Lightning #HAVE I SAID HOW MUCH I LOVE MY BABIES YET?? #sorry #my very rare OTP #thank YOU anon!!! #OTP #Rare pair #final fantasy xv #final fantasy 15 #ffxv #final fantasy xiii #final fantasy #final fantasy xiii-2 #final fantasy lightning returns #lightning returns #ffxiii #ffxiii-2 #ffxiii lightning returns #ship

[hillbillied]

I cba to count but any numbers what havent been already answered for the fic asks g ✌🏼

35 Questions for Fanfic Writers! welchh killed the meme

that’s all the odd numbers, you fuckin cunt, I’m gonna crush you in the lidl aisle with a tort textbook (thanks for these, I love em!! except for the couple that’re embarrassing; fuck you!!)

3. What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works?

the sheer audacity of either the AU concept or the scope of project; they’re either ballsy, like a fic that moves through 300+ years of history, or stupid shit like “hey what if alien but with robots and gay?” (if i wanted to be meta i’d say a gay guy writing gay guys has gotta have an appeal, at least to other guys like me)

5. What’s the fic you’re most proud of?

When It Rains It Pours is my “magnum opus” (bleeding quotations) it’s the fic i always wanted to write. post-canon fix-it, exploring the details of two characters i love making their way in the world (close second is Church of Saint Andrew because it was just a horrible idea)

7. What element of writing do you struggle with most?

overwriting. i sit down to write fun lil romps between chapter updates and then suddenly i got 10k words and a new multi-chapter fic. there’s no “lil one-shot for a break” because i just… can’t write them like that. really bums me out

9. Which character(s) do you find most difficult to write?

trick question, i only write AndyEddie and am therefore immune (i don’t think i write Sledge as well as i could, tbr)

11. Who or what do you find yourself writing about most?

Andy, Eddie, and their gay antics

13. First fandom you ever wrote for?

these are real interesting ones because they’re just me embarrassing myself innit… i wrote for Bleach. like the anime. i was 11, maybe. fucking end me

15. What’s the weirdest fandom you’ve ever written for?

i want to die saying this but ya’ll remember Death Note? probably that

17. A trope you’ll never, ever write for.

i’m not putting it on me blog but the one that uses the greek alphabet

19. Do you prefer canon-compliant, AUs, or something in-between?

all fucking three, baby, fanfiction is a buffet and i got my All You Can Eat token!!

20. Gen fic or shippy stuff?

don’t mind gen fic if it’s multi-pairing so the focus is on other stuff, but otherwise gimme them ships

21. Favorite pairing to write for? (platonic or romantic!)

this question is unlawful, do not pass go, do not collect fifty quid and a statue from bristol river

22. Do you listen to anything while you write?

always!! normally lil youtube playlists for most fics, if not then just whatever gives that general vibe

23. Do you prefer prompts and challenges, or completely independent ideas?

i like a good prompt when it suits but mainly it’s indie fics (“indie fic” is a cursed term)

24. One-shots or multi-chaptered works?

i write one-shots in my fantasies, and multi-chaps in practice

25. Have you ever daydreamed about side adventures/spin-offs from your fic? Tell us about them!

shit, i’d kill for a spin-off of Church of Saint Andrew from Andy’s POV. centuries of being reincarnated over and over, meeting a random guy every lifetime and wondering why he treats you like he knows you, like he loves you… that’d be fucked up and fantastic.

every canon era fic i write is lowkey a side adventure/spin-off of When it Rain it Pours, tbh, like that’s my canon touchstone for writing

26. Is there anything you’ve wanted to write, but you’ve been too scared to try?

less too scared to try and more not willing to commit the effort. some things are so niche and so self-indulgent it’s not worth putting into text, not until I’ve got a fuckton of time on my hands

28. How well do you handle criticism when it comes to your writing?

i used to handle it terribly. now I handle it better. i’ve got a real specific viewpoint on fanfiction crit nowerdays; since fanfic is free, takes effort, and is not inherently for the reader, any criticism given should be a) asked for by the writer, and b) on points of actual relevance rather than “i personally do not like X”. if it doesn’t comply with those criteria, i find myself asking why someone took the time to write the public comment. you can complain about bad fic privately, like all things

29. Have you ever gone outside of your comfort zone for a fic? How did it turn out?

there’s a WIP in my docs from Andy’s POV that deals with some heavier shit and yeah, that was a step outside but if you push through it, your comfort zone expands like bread for the ducks

30. Tooth-rotting fluff or merciless angst?

merciless angst, we die like men

31. Do you have any OCs? Tell us about them!

yes and you will never hear about them but know they are jewish and gay

34. Copy and paste an excerpt you’re particularly fond of.

(fuck almost pasted from my uni work about cyclist helmets) thought you’d enjoy this one:

His name’s Edward Allison Jones and he likes to think his life story can be summed up in under a page. Probably less than.

Where to start? It’s a boring beginning.

Born in a place called Red Lion, that he hasn’t been back to since he screamed his little baby scream at the midwife. It wasn’t a good start, either, considering his parents hightailed it out of there and over the West Virginia Stateline to avoid paying for his little baby entrance. They tell the story like they’re fucking Bonny and Clyde, but their son imagines it more like Flintstones. Yabba dabba doo.

35. Ramble about any fic-related thing you want!

quick fire round: i can’t stop watching the legend of korra (it’s fuckin good man) and it keeps bringin me back to the avatar AU, every time i write “cunt” in a fic i feel americans clutch their pearls, i’m getting back into the old groove of making chars jewish and not giving a fuck, once I found out “high school” was just secondary school i couldn’t write/read high school AUs cause that’s grim tbh, and sometimes i don’t even watch tv shows i use for AUs because I’m a busy boy

#long post i apologise but like i'm innocent #welchh #i need an ask tag and now i have

[femslashrevolution]

To my fellow femslash lovers and creaters:

This post is part of Femslash Revolution’s I Am Femslash series, sharing voices of F/F creators from all walks of life. The views represented within are those of the author only.

I struggled with thinking of what I was going to write for this, so I settled on what I know best – (being overly dramatic about) my own experiences, and what femslash means to me – in the hopes that other people will relate, and maybe feel a little more confident in who they are and what they do. So:

When I first started writing femslash myself, I was still very much in the closet. I couldn’t help but feel a little guilty, because I wasn’t supposed to let myself think like that or indulge those fantasies. But I did anyway, and for once that guilt didn’t stop me, and I felt oddly light because of it.

Looking back, I think the first fic I ever posted was a very poorly written allydia au about 5 or 6 years ago, but even though it’s cringe-worthy writing, I still can’t bring myself to take it down. Because I remember how it felt to write it. It wasn’t just fun, it was thrilling. Here I was, just recently having accepted the fact that I liked girls, writing about other girls loving girls. It was like my big-little secret, my own personal revolution, this whole part of me that I couldn’t really talk about yet, but I could express through the characters I loved. 

I felt giddy, and powerful—if wanted this female character to kiss that one, I could sit down, crack open my laptop, and make it happen. And once I realized that I didn’t have to stop at one pairing, and saw all the content that people were making for others, I kept at it. I would bring notebooks with me to work in the summer, and write while in between shifts, create alternate universes where other women could be everything I was too scared to be yet, and have what I wanted. When I got to college my freshman year, still deep in the closet but trying to pretend that part of me wasn’t real less and less, I would feel a certain kind of rush from writing stories like these in my corner of the library, out in the open even if nobody could know what was on my screen. It was something all my own, but also something I realized from the content I consumed that I didn’t have to keep to myself, that I could share with the world relatively anonymously. 

It was me saying: hey, look at these girls in love, look at how complex their lives and their relationships are, look at all the different scenarios I can put them in, look at what I like, look at what I could be. I wasn’t ready to embrace it in real life, but those desires didn’t have to be locked up and hidden inside me anymore either. If I wanted a girl to hold me and kiss me without being afraid someone would see, I could make that happen in my writing. If I wanted to see my favorite, cheesy romantic clichés play out between women, I could read it or write it. If I wanted to talk about how much I liked it when girls wore a certain thing, or looked a certain way, or talked about something they were passionate about, I could do that through the eyes of a character I connected with and be comforted that if I couldn’t have that yet, I could give that to someone else and pretend that they did.

What made it really worth it, though, was the small group of people who I found myself interacting with through all of this, who would comment on my stuff when I would comment on theirs, or message me about certain pairings, as excited and passionate as I was about them and for a lot of the same reasons. What made it worth it was knowing that other people could see themselves in these characters, too, and feeling so connected to people I’d never even met or talked to before. It was knowing that I wasn’t alone in feeling what I felt, or wanting to see the kind of content I was creating. 

One day, I want to publish my own stories, stories where girls fall in love, and break up, and go on adventures, and live their lives real and raw, and fall in love again. One day, I want to create my own characters, characters that will hopefully resonate with women and young girls holed up in their bedrooms writing about things they’re too scared to admit yet, in the position I was in not long ago. And when that time comes, I won’t have to be anonymous anymore. It might sound cheesy, but I really don’t think I could have gotten there without the initial jumping board and that spark of confidence that writing femslash has given me.

Which is why I wanted to give a special shoutout to anyone who has ever created femslash content, or consumed it, or loved it in any way. I especially want to make sure all of you know that you are appreciated.

Listen, we all know that often femslash pairings aren’t nearly as popular as slash and het (unless the pairing is two white woman going up against a canon interracial het ship, but I’m not going to get into that whole mess right now for the sake of keeping this positive—I just think it’s important to acknowledge there are definitely problems within a lot of popular femslash in fandoms and that femslash ships aren’t automatically perfect). It’s no secret that femslash works typically don’t get a fraction of the attention that content for other pairings do, and that unlike other categories, the people creating content for femslash pairings are almost always lgbtq+ women themselves. But for all my fellow femslash creators and lovers out there, particularly those of you who create for rare pairs you love or fall in love with pairings from shows that don’t get the attention they should, I just want you all to know that even though you might not get as many notes, or kudos, or comments, your work still matters. 

It matters to someone out there who’s navigating their identity but might not really have anyone to talk to as they’re coming to terms with the fact that they like girls. It matters to someone out there who’s struggling to find a label they feel comfortable with, or realizing that labels might not be for them after all. It matters to lesbians learning to accept the fact that they don’t like boys and they don’t have to despite what society tells us, and that’s okay. It matters to bi girls who are realizing it’s okay to like both. It matters to people like me. I’m sure it means something to you. So please, keep your head up, and remember that those 10 kudos on your fic might really be worth a thousand, and that drawing you made you were upset only got 20 notes is saved as someone’s computer background because it made them smile so much, and there’s a girl listening to that shippy playlist you made on repeat because she knows how it feels to pine after her best friend.

My point is, don’t let anyone make you feel like your work doesn’t matter, or let numbers and stats make you think it doesn’t mean anything. It means something. So keep on creating.

About the author: I never know what to write for these kind of things um. I’m Alex, I’m 21 and a senior in college, graduating this May and preparing to attend law school next fall. In terms of fandom, as you can probably imagine based on what I wrote here, the kind of content I create is mostly fic, but I love just talking and headcanoning about femslash pairings in general too. Also, because I feel like this is relevant for this piece, I guess I should mention that I’m a lesbian, but that it took me a long time to accept that and to be comfortable with my identity. But I’m getting there, and I’d be lying if I said creating this kind of content and writing and reading about this kind of stuff hasn’t helped. So…cheers! (Some links below)

Link to Main Blog // Link to AO3

#speedforcelesbian #I Am Femslash #Femslash February #Femslash February 2017 #Type: Meta #submission