#i was so obsessed with putting as many tiny details and headcanons into this as i could lol | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nekomacheercaptain · 1 year

Note

alright i am pulling up a chair and giving you the mic 🪑🎤

take this time to say anything you want about your gentle giant. idc how long it gets i want to know your thoughts the moment you saw him, what you thought of him yeeting law and Baby 5 out, how you felt about what he did, his sacrifice, if you think the show would be better and any very self indulgent headcanons you would love to tell others

Oh my god I don’t even know where to start oh shit but I guess I have to put up a line again because I have so many thoughts about Corazon

This came out to be 2,7K words omg so YES this gets a "keep reading" line

I read the manga before my exam this spring, and I remember thinking Corazon was cute and lovable, but I didn’t start my hardcore simping for him then (I was in my Kid and Killer obsession hahah), it wasn’t until the end of July when I saw a TikTok about Law and Corazon that my brain switched and I got a craving for that man. So then I started reading fics, read all about him in the wiki pages, read theories, read his chapters over again (cried like a bitch) and watched his episodes (and cried even more, my heart broke seeing it all animated and with audio fuck), and I do watch his episodes religiously, because I hate myself apparently:))

He’s a fully blown obsession for me now, the worst I’ve ever had, but he’s so sweet how can I not??? His introduction is super cool (and PLEASE his grunt when he sits down after slapping Baby 5 and Buffalo????? The hottest shit I’ve ever heard, I’m a slut for deep voices like that). And I did find it hilarious when he yeeted Law, I’m sorry, the shot is just too funny. Also the sound when Corazon falls to the floor?? I love it, it’s a fun detail. His clumsiness, the one part of him he just can’t hide is so cute and adorable and melts my heart, but I already knew it was gonna go so fucking wrong later :)) so when he stumbled down that snowy mountain after getting the op op fruit I was preparing myself for his death (I was fortunately not spoiled of WHEN he died and how). And this was when I wasn’t even obsessed with him, and read the manga, I was wailing while reading Law’s backstory.

My heart hurt SO MUCH when tiny little Law managed to find the one enemy on the island. FUCK Vergo >:(. This little boy who just wanted to live a nice life with the giant who risked his life to save him, unbeknownst to him he put aside the mission of saving an entire country from his evil brother.

We already know he’s dead so yeah the backstory hurts like a fucking bitch, because we know it doesn’t end well for him :,)) you’re just anticipating the moment he’s killed, and when it happens it’s in the worst way possible, because it was inevitable and Law still thought there was a chance they would be together, but Cora knew that once he put down the chest’s lid that was the very last time he would look into the eyes of that poor little boy.

Corazon is such an important character, if it wasn’t for him, Law would be Doffy #2. Doffy and Law are clear parallels, where they both were troubled, vengeful children, but Doffy got picked out and raised by like minded people who encouraged and promised that rage and revenge he was seeking, whereas Law got kidnapped by a man who gave his life to a mission that would grant safety for an entire country from his brother. But he abandoned that for Law. He made Law believe there were still things worth living for, he gave Law something he hadn’t had for over 3 years; freedom to live. Freedom to live how he wants, no longer tied to his illness and Doffy.

One Piece is all about free will, and Corazon’s sacrifice is the epitome of that. He didn’t have to save Law at all, even if he was a D. He wanted to save him, he wanted to give hope again to this depressed, angry dying little boy because he couldn’t stand hearing a child talk about their awful fate like that. He threw away his mission for this little boy whose time was limited, ultimately failing a country that his brother would later bestow a great tragedy upon.

Have I thought about writing fics where he survives? Absolutely, wether it be the marines take him into custody barely alive, hanging by a thread, and finally manage to tell them about Dressrosa? Either an OC or y/n joined Corazon and Law on their journey and ultimately managed to save Corazon, but lost Law, not able to find him until 11 or 13 years later when he became a big name all over the world? Or the one I think would hurt the most; Doffy brought his dying brother back with him and has held him captive in a cell ever since that day, and Law doesn’t know he’s been alive all this time because he got freed by Corazon. And while he’s in Dressrosa captive in Doffy’s castle, he finally meets his thought to be dead adoptive father who has been tortured, abused, neglected, isolated, and just completely destroyed for those 13 years. But fuck Law would think Doffy was playing a disgusting trick on him, somehow creating a look-alike just to fuck with him. However, he would break down when Corazon, as awkward and clumsy as only he can be, would joke with a croaky, hoarse voice revealing his abuse; “I’m sorry I couldn’t meet you on Swallow Island”.

And then Law would know. He would fucking know everything he’s been fighting and planning for the past 13 years, that vengefulness and emptiness inside of him, was for nothing. It was created by Doffy for nothing. What he had wanted ever since that godawful day was right in front of him, but his smile had been ripped away. The symbol he so proudly had displayed on his back, the symbol of his life, was taken away from the one who had inspired him so much. His savior was no longer one who smiled with his whole face, he was just the shell of a man he used to be. The life in his eyes had been sucked out completely. And that was even worse than him being dead, wasn’t it?

When everything was said and done and Dressrosa was finally freed, Law and Corazon would cry, Law wailing and sobbing into his adoptive father’s chest, and MY GOD SENGOKU WAS THERE TOO. He too would feel like he saw a ghost, his old mind wanting to mess with him, but there he was. His son, his beautiful, kind Rosinante. The son he lost all those years ago, the one that had only lied to him once, a lie that cost him his life. He was standing right in front of him. And it was like he was taken back to the first time they met, seeing that young, lost boy malnourished and distressed in front of him. And he even had a grandson this time around, and though he was a pirate, he was now a part of the family.

I would want for Corazon to join Law, it would be awful for them to part again. For 13 years Law hadn’t had a peaceful night’s sleep without nightmares and noise, his days had been full of bad memories lurking over him, haunting his every move, that day never leaving his mind. And Corazon couldn’t refuse his son, now an adult, his company, promising he would never abandon his side. And after 13 years, Law finally experienced peace in his mind. Well, the only exception being the strawhats.

He would never admit it out loud, but Law would never let his dad out of his sight, giving him tasks that provided him the safety of keeping the gentle giant close at all times. The first thing Law did when Corazon joined him would be to sit down with him and ask what Doffy had done, if there were any injuries that needed an inspection, anything. But secretly he wanted to know what the hell he had been forced to endure the last 13 years to be so different, feeling like he was the one being positive, contradicting their earlier roles. It would take a long time for Corazon to get used to being himself and free again, and Law would cry softly at night, going right back to where he was 13 years ago right after losing his entire world. He almost didn’t notice how quiet it was at night, just like it was those 6 months alone with Corazon. Some things never change :,)

Okay ehm I have to stop there and continue…. His power!!!! His power is so underrated, if that man wasn’t nice and was on plan with his brother, just imagine the destruction they could do??? It’s insane. AND who gets the best sleep in the entire world???? This guy <3

I also headcanon that he knows sign language, it just makes sense and would be cool. More people should learn it (and yeah, Doflamingo knows it too and teaches the kids the filthiest and meanest signs known to man). Writing on a piece of paper is an exhausting form of communication, using signs is better.

Okay, so very self-indulgence, you say??? 👀 I do nothing BUT think of that, I am a proud self-shipper so this will mostly be about me haha (will most likely be a bit nsfw too, since I’m on my period)

Okay so I am chubby, I have thick thighs, arms, rolls on my back, and hella chub on my tummy, and I just imagine Cora as someone that would go fucking crazy over that (he doesn’t care about body types and size etc, though, he would fo crazy for anyone), when it comes to his sweetheart, he’s on his knees as soon as they are in his field of vision. I would be his favorite pillow fr 🫡 He would also fawn over my stretch marks and trace them whenever he got the chance and say how beautiful they were and kiss and lick them asdfghjkl I also have hella boobs and ass, so I’m just a really squishy person in general, I could be his personal stress ball <3 whether it’d be wholesome or sexual stress relief, I don’t mind, he can use me for whatever whenever he wants. I am at his disposal 24/7, if I could serve him for the rest of my life I WOULD WHERE DO I SIGN UP, I’M READY

We would bond over our clumsiness and exchange stories about our scars and broken bones (and you bet your fucking ass he would kiss all my scars and places I’ve been hurt). We would have to proof our shared living spaces as to not get hurt, and he would have to use the kitchen as little as possible. This man is literally Spencer Shay and I cannot afford to buy a new house every week because he’s an accidental arsonist.

Cora would cry when Law start school tbh both out of joy that this traumatized little guy is finally living a normal life and is safe, and because his little baby bird is taking a leap out of the comfort of their nest. He’d be horrendous with helping Law with him homework as he grows older, seeing as that boy is smart as HELL. But Cora is the greatest emotional support you can ever get!!! He’s literally a personal hype man for everybody he loves <3

He’s not really good at first aid (because he can’t do much with his hands without dropping something or mess it up - except for fingerfucking or otherwise worshiping you with his hands, that he does perfectly). We got just a little glimpse of that when he asked Law what to do when Law fell sick and he panicked, my poor husband :,)) He’s (just like me) not the best under pressure, but it’s okay

He would honestly LOVE to go shopping, he would be the one forcing me out of the house. He would make a family day out of it and force me and Law with him to buy what we wanted. He’s a giver and loves to spoil. His love language is primarily acts of service, but gift-giving is high up there too. And physical affection. And quality time…. And words of affirmation. He just loves to love and loves to be loved.

I feel like he’s good at baking??? Like a secret talent you’d discover and be baffled over, because this giant man covered in scars, has a deep ass voice and used to be part of one of the most dangerous pirate groups like to make cupcakes? That’s too cute, he’d be the dad all the moms in the neighborhood would gossip and drool about - AND I WOULD LAUGH AT THEM BECAUSE HE’S MINE HAH 🫶 also I love to bake, when I have the money, so it would be a lovely activity to do together

He’d figure out whenever there would be clear sky nights, and bring a cute picnic set and blanket so that our little family could watch the stars, and if we were lucky, meteor rain. I just like to think that he’s infatuated with the universe, stars and the moon, especially when he was undercover in the Donquixote Family and were on the open seas. He’d ask to have the night shifts so that he could be alone in the crow’s nest, and the sky would become his greatest comfort and he couldn’t resist muttering small wishes; a hope for a better future. And he can’t help but get emotional when he looks at the tiny family he created, his favorite pair of eyes admiring the sky that fulfilled his wish.

Okay fuck I probably have a lot more headcanons, but I can’t think of anymore, so let’s get over to the juicy stuff <3

This man is BIG he’d prolong and resist having full-on penetrative sex as long as he could, he wouldn’t give in until you persuaded him into it, and could take at least two of his fingers without any problems (and honestly, even that took a lot of time for your body to adjust to). This man is 3 meters tall, he’s PACKING. His hands are gigantic too, they make lovely necklaces <3

As a heavier girl, I love that he could easily pick anyone up and just fuck them like that, MANHANDLING IS SUCH A TURN ON DEAR GOD I NEED THIS MAN. Not that it would be his favorite position, though, he wants to be above you, but because of the size difference, it doesn’t really work that well. But if he has to break his back just to look into your eyes as he fucks you deep, showing you how much he loves you, he will.

He wouldn’t mind you riding him at all though, allowing his hands to freely roam your body, seeing you bounce on top of him as you used him to your pleasure??? Sign him UP, he fucking loves being used, doesn’t matter if he cums or not honestly, he’ll get off of you reaching your peak because of him. And if he ever saw a belly bulge, he’d be embarrassed over how turned on he gets at the bump standing out of your stomach.

FUCKING BODY WORSHIP ALL DAY ALL NIGHT BABY he’d make you feel like a goddess with they way he’s always complimenting you, everything about you being perfect in his eyes. He’d feel bad about leaving marks at first, but when he sees how good you look with the reminder that you’re his all over your body, he would never let you go without them. If you marked him?? Oh dear god he could die happily, he would be so proud and talk about it all day and would beg you to make more marks. Raking your hands down his broad muscular back, clawing at his chest, or grabbing his sides??? He didn’t mind, he would almost faint at the view of your hands’ work in the mirror. He’d feel so proud.

Okay shit now my brain is out of juice, and can’t pump out anymore, BUT THANK YOU FOR THIS TED-TALK, HOOLIE I really needed it <3 sorry it got so long

#one piece #hooliescorner #lovely hoolie ♡ (⇀ 3 ↼)#corazon #cheer's a simp #thirst

6 notes · View notes

astaroth1357 · 3 years

Text

How the Brothers Would Try to Corrupt MC w/ Their Sin

I have a headcanon that it's part of demonic nature to try and corrupt humans. Though I think it would be unlikely that the brothers would try to intentionally corrupt MC post-pact, it's still like second nature to them. That means they may try to unintentionally, uh… infect their soul with sin and drag them down into eternal damnation! They don't mean it, but be careful MCs of the world.

Lucifer

One of the hardest things to do can be to make others take pride in themselves… but Lucifer is always ready for a challenge.

The name of the game is praise. The human mind can be easy to manipulate so with enough praise even the most stubborn human will start to believe a drop of their own hype.

Building up pride is a steady thing... He'll usually pick a strength or talent of the MC to give high praise. Perhaps they sing beautifully or they're rather clever, don't worry. He'd let them know.

Light sprinkles of praise steadily increase their self-esteem, which may seem nice and almost healthy at first, but in truth he's laying a trap… He knows how effective his words can be and he's just waiting for them to go to the MC's head.

You think then he would be done right? Oh no. That's not the fun part. What's fun is to then offend that pride he's spent so long building.

He thinks it's cute, really. A small comment here or a little condensation there and they'll get so mad. It's just so amusing!

Of course, he can't take what he dishes, so they'll need to watch out. But don't worry he loves them, even if they're just a little too fun to play with…

Mammon

Since when does the Avatar of Greed give gifts?

Really, that should be the MC's first red flag. Mammon isn't known for generosity, so when he's spending what little money he can hold onto on them, it's time to raise some eyebrows.

It may seem nice, almost sweet, when he manages to track down a rare vintage of wine for them or take them out to a ritzy restaurant for the night but unfortunately it's all just part of the plan…

Nobody has tastes higher than Mammon. He can't afford them most of the time, which leads to compromises, but given all the Grim in the world he'd be living in the lap of luxury - which is exactly the kind of lifestyle he wants the MC to crave too.

Anyone, no matter how modest, can give into temptation. How easy would it be to taste the sweetest wine or enjoy the most wonderful trip then want to do it again? It may seem innocent at first, but piling on the finer things can soon have the MC craving for them when they pass.

Then all Mammon needs is to make little promises, "If I make it big this time, then we'll go to France!" or, "If I win this next hand then I'll buy ya another glass."

So how many times will the MC give Mammon a pass, then? Will they stop questioning how he comes up with his cash? Will they let him gamble just that "little bit" longer? Will they even join him...?

If they keep getting that taste of luxury, then maybe it's not so bad… right?

Leviathan

You think the easiest way to get the MC jealous would be to flirt with other people since that's how most people go about it but, uh…

This is Levi we're talking about. Casual flirting is pretty much out of the question.

So what is a demon to do to get their hapless human jealous? The answer is, be patient.

No one's perfect, humans especially! They'll slip up eventually…

Maybe someone from back home just got a new car or they're sending out marriage invites.

Maybe they have a friend who's better than them at school or sports or there's just someone who has something they want: Money, talent, looks, followers, friends, you name it. When they see it, he can feel that envy creeping in…

From there, all he has to do is feed it. Let the world poke at their little insecurities for him while he plays the supportive boyfriend!

"Did Mammon really get the promotion? I thought it would have been you! That's so unfair..."

"Satan beat your scores again? What is this, the third time? Doesn't that suck?"

Small little comments… but all with a goal to fill the MC with toxicity...

"Are Asmo videos still doing better than yours? I think I know how to drop his numbers... if you want."

And soon enough, anyone can be an enemy. Everyone has it better than them… so they push the world away in order to feel better. And they become so toxic, the world rejects them in turn...

Except, of course, for their loving boyfriend, Levi.

Satan

If you want to keep someone mad, it's best if you're not the actual one doing it.

I know, it sounds counterintuitive, but turning yourself into the enemy risks the target cutting you out. Satan knows this, so he'll never enrage the MC directly...

But indirectly? There's a start.

Everybody has little pet peevs. Tiny things that aren't important, but dig under the skin nonetheless.

Breadcrumbs in the butter, gum-smacking, toe-tapping, tones of voice, or just little annoying inconveniences that can sour one's day...

Satan is well-versed in these tiny annoyances, he'd dare say they're in his domain. And, perspective that he is, he'll know what frustrates the MC soon enough.

Then it's just a matter of execution.

Maybe he jacks with their toothpaste tube or "conveniently" forgets where they put their books... Or they keep mysteriously finding fingerprints on their game disks or seemingly can't keep their room organized to save their life!

It may just seem like the world hates them... but really it's just their demonic lover.

These tiny details and little mishaps will just build and build like cracks in their foundation until it all breaks and comes crashing down… and he'll be right there egging on every moment of it!

Asmodeus

You would think that Asmo would have the easiest time tempting the MC into his sin, but that's not so.

Sure, most traditional definitions of Lust begin and end at carnal desire, but what about those MCs who maybe aren't so drawn to the sins of the flesh? Fear not! Because the keyword for Asmo is desire.

Really, Asmo is happy if the MC's mind is full of nothing but him. He wants them to desire him, to love him obviously, but to the point of obsession. His heated kisses and sensual whispers are only means to that end, which can change whenever he needs.

The MC will have their life bombarded by their beautiful demon. It's not an unwelcome smothering, he's among the best boyfriends they could ever hope to have, which is exactly why he’s so effective!

He wants them to need him at every moment. Soon it will feel weird to go places alone without their demon… Certain things they could do themselves, like their hair or getting dressed, they'll want him to do instead.

Of course, if he's able then he'll certainly seduce them as well and at every chance he gets! From the House to RAD and even in the throne room - he's shameless!... But that's the fun, isn't it?

Beelzebub

Oh Beel… He's probably the most dangerous one of them all. Not because he's so demonic, but because he's so sweet!

When Beel makes food for the MC or orders them an extra side, he does so with love. He just wants them to be full! ...or so he thinks.

Beel's demonic instincts creep up on even him, he's just not one to really question what or why he does things sometimes. He'll know he has the urge to see the MC eat or just be indulgent… but he won’t know why.

You could actually say it works to his advantage. Whenever he offers the MC another turkey leg or a few more bites of cake, his tenderhearted insistence is often so sweet that they'll just go along with it and try to keep eating… even if they're already full.

Now, the human body can only take so much food at once, but over time it can adapt to changing habits.

Eventually, the MC will find their appetite expanding to catch up… They'll stop feeling full as easily as they used to and soon the bigger portions that Beel gives them will be all but a necessity!

Of course, the worst case scenario is that this doesn't happen at all and they do serious harm to their health by always pushing past their limits… but there's no guarantee Beel's solution won't just be more food anyway.

Belphegor

Belphie is the only brother who will knowingly (and gleefully) try to make the MC as sinful as he is!

It's all for selfish reasons. If the MC is slothful, then they'll want to go out less and (probably) spend time with him more. Win-win if you're Belphie.

Since he's well aware of what he's doing, he's pretty damn effective at it. No other brother will be as committed to meddling with the MC as he is.

He'll convince them to cancel plans or sabotage their alarms so they oversleep. He'll suddenly be unable to sleep without them while his naps seemingly get longer and longer… And if they have something to do, he'll be the voice in their ear saying it can wait!

Really, at any opportunity he can get Belphie will try to drag them down or slow their progress with the sweet, sweet promise of relaxation or a good time...

Sure, it may sound nice at the time - great even! - but it won't take long for their promises to break or deadlines to pile up… Sure, the MC could try to catch up but wouldn't that be too much work? Wouldn't they rather rest instead? Why even worry about it?

It's a seductive line of thought and Belphie sells it well, it'd take only the most motivated MC to resist his charms but like that'd stop him. If he wants the MC for himself, he'll happily put their life on hold to do so. Just go with it... yeah?

#obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me headcanons #i got really excited to use the word ritzy #don't get enough chances for that kind of thing

2K notes · View notes

lemonboyjosten · 2 years

Text

—tw//health deterioration, mva, depression

wow it's been awhile since it posted anything huh, hi i'm alive. i've got so much to say while i was away. personally, this year has been an extreme struggle for me and i can't express how much i needed this platform to confide in you precious beings. i sincerely hope you all have been well, and those of you who usually hang around in my comment section, i havent forgotten the lot of you. you can stick with me on this rant or choose to scroll away. either way i need to get this out of my chest so to those who have wasted your time reading this, thank you, i appreciate it.

if i calculated right, i've been off social media for give or take, 4 months now. this year started off sluggish for me because i got tested positive for covid early march and being immunodeficient really affected my health which pretty much deteriorated since then, not to mention my already suckish lungs were failing on me. hence, i wasn't able to continue with classes so med school was put on hold and then came the early signs of depression knocking on my door as though it was personally invited. i needed some sense of normalcy so i thought i would be healthy enough to get back to the flow of writing and i was, even had my thought process in order and my tiny lungs even started recovering slowly after a month. so i started writing again and even signed up for the aftg exchange and everything with full confidence that i'll be able to deliver and give back to the fandom. i had the whole draft ready to be proof read and posted, with a few other projects i was working waiting to be published but all that went to hell when i was involved in a motor vehicle accident that day which cost me partial function of my leg.

3 months of physiotherapy helped me recover some of my strength but my ambulatory power has reduced for the time being. to add fuel onto the fire, the accident injured my lungs further and i was unstable for quite a period of time. to say i was devastated would be an understatement , i thought of giving up altogether. plus, i lost my scholarship because i wasnt able sit for my exams due to being absent for many classes and that really brought me down. the thought of being a constant dissapoinment and burden to my family members was something i couldn't process the thought of having failed those who've constantly had hopes for me and that hurt even more. i failed to even to contribute in the fandom after receiving my exchange gift made me feel like shit but then i had the best support during these last few months which helped me get back into shape and the right mindset. they even encouraged me to get back on track, start with your close friends circle, family then on my socials and actively engage with others and as cliche as it may sound, it worked wonders, i'm not even joking.

hell, i thought all my socials would've evaporated but based on the number of interaction i've received despite not showing any signs of life made me so happy. (our tiny not so tiny fandom is throving huh) my irls couldnt care less about my absence but the dms that came in through this account asking about my obsession with a stupid sports/mafia series really brought up my spirits and i will to continue my efforts because apprently it's a way to get rid of thoughts of self harm or loneliness; they say it's some kind of positive reinforcement or something like that. so here i am after months of suffering from hell and back. anywho, that's all for my sob story. i didnt want to go detail into some things but if you're interested to know more,feel free to dm me and i'll be more than happy to talk. here's to hoping 2022 would suck less and i'll have the capacity to write more. i miss you guys so much. either way, get ready for more aftg headcanons and fics coming your way. happy new year lovelies! take care and stay safe:)

#aftg #happy new year fuckers #all for the game

14 notes · View notes

ourstarscollided · 3 years

Text

jatp fanworks appreciation - day 1 (writers)

motivation - so in true me fashion and my aversion to brevity, i've made three (3) posts (see also artists, gifs/edits) to celebrate the wonderful people in this fandom who have made my jatp tumblr experience what it is; a community of people who simply shout into the void about their love of a ghost band and their fearless female leader. i've enjoyed simply being on the sidelines admiring everyone's love for the show, but i thought this would be a good time to really show my appreciation for all these wonderful people, because if i've learned anything from this pandemic, it's that there is NEVER a wrong time to tell someone that they are simply ✨the best✨.

disclaimer: i don't interact with most of these people personally and i simply absorb their content from afar and scream about how wonderful they are in the tags.

This list kind of became a fic rec, so if you're looking for some wonderful fics to read (or reread), I've also included my favs from the author here as well.

Okay this is gonna get a little long so please bear with me. But I just wanted to preamble this by saying that the fanfiction written by the jatp fandom is what resparked my love for reading fiction after about 3-4 years of not reading for leisure (be an adult they said. it'll be fun they said.). So I'm really grateful for that? I don't interact with a lot of people, just because it makes me a little anxious, but I will constantly yell about your content in the tags as if I were on a set of bleachers with a megaphone.

I also know there are so many wonderful fic writers out there (on Tumblr and not on Tumblr) that make amazing pieces of work, and this is just a tiny peek into that, and is not at all conclusive.

Without further ado here are some writers who live rent free in my head, in alphabetical order, so feel free to just skip to your name to avoid my rambling:

@bluefirewrites -> your Merry Ex-Mas fic had me on the edge of my seat every single time you updated. I am so in love with how you wrote the characters into this and at how many words you churned out for this fic. This was filled with so much adventure, and it was really welcome during a time when the world wasn't allowed to travel. And I simply love all the other drabbles and fics you write, but I especially enjoy the hilarity of Ray Molina, Crime Scene Photographer and Matchmaker.

@captainkippen -> I'm pretty sure Love Drunk was one of the first fics I ever read in this fandom. Your stories and your writing feel so goddamn real and I find myself so immersed in the worlds that you've created. I have reread most of your jatp fics and I still manage to find myself stupidly grinning at my phone each time. Your stories flow so easily and are such perfect characterizations of the characters we know from the show, but elevated to fit into your verse. I cannot say enough how wonderful your writing is and how talented you are!! (also a slight nudge that I am still very much following along with The Key and the Crown and I hope you continue it!)

@catty-words -> Your???? Exhaustive??? Music??? Lists???? The amount of work and dedication and microanalyzing that you put into pulling out every detail from each scene is so admirable. You not only manage to find the details, but you also give us EVIDENCE via your intricately selected gifs. You could've just put the video of the performance, but no, you take your time to find that specific 1 second shot to emphasize your point. And your little fics that you sometimes throw out into the world? They're so beautiful, and so fun to read and I enjoy them so much! (I am STILL screaming about this band's a snack) Thank you for validating my yelling in the tags, and for feeding my hyperfixation to this show. (I'm sad these lists are ending soon, but it's about the journey ya know?)

@lydias--stiles -> I don't even know what to say here because I've yelled so much about your fics that I feel like there's really nothing else to yell. Your Road Trip AU was also one of the first ones I read in this fandom, and really just made me go absolutely feral. Pretty sure I absorbed the rest of your fics in an ungodly amount of time and I just simply think you are incredibly skilled and talented. Every time you post a new fic I always wonder what it's like to be in your head because the ideas you come up with are so unique and so well thought out. Thank you for all the art you create for this show, I will constantly be in awe of you. (Special shoutout to the 5+1 fic that became a 31 chapter monster)

@pearlcaddy -> This list would not be complete if I didn't mention you. First of all, thank you for suggesting this wonderful week, it has been so lovely to see so much love being spread around today. Secondly, I never thought I'd find myself reading a Buffy or a Wizarding World crossover fic, considering I know nothing about those two things. And yet I found myself on various nights after work at 3 in the morning just silently screaming and/or crying into my phone. Your writing is so insane. Your world building is so insane. Your banter/dialogue is insane. The way you capture the love between Julie/Luke in different universes is so perfect. Thank you for gifting us these beautiful pieces of art, and I hope you know that you have at least made one person (me) a very happy reader. I also really admire your dedication to "this will only be a oneshot", only to write like 4 other POVs for it. (Special shoutout to 100 Bad Days)

@ruzek-halstead -> Literally every single fic you have written lives rent free in my head. The way you've managed to build this universe of different Julies and Lukes, and each one still captures the essence of them is astounding. You've extended their characters beyond what we know from the show and I am just in awe of everything you write. Please know that dead of night is both triggering to me and yet the most hilarious thing I have read. (Special shoutout to the Fake Dating Christmas AU and of course the Cinderella Story AU)

@serendipitee -> Your stories and your writing are absolutely magical. I think Write It Down was one of the first multi-chapter fics that I followed super closely and whenever you updated, I would literally drop what I was doing and read it instantly. You have such a way of building the plot and the characters for all of your fics and drabbles, and making the reader just want more. Please know that I am so obsessed with Oh, She Waltzed With the Dead and I cannot wait to see where you take the story!

@sunsetcurbed -> I have no words for your writing. I am simply in awe every time I read something from you. The way you've got down Alex and Willie's voice to a tee is so crazy good. You write their characters and their stories with such grace and care, especially with how you approach the topic of mental health. Thank you for all the research you do and for also writing in your own experiences. I literally binged the Princes Diaries AU during work and lost a good half day to it, and I regret nothing because that fic left me in SHAMBLES. I secretly adore the way you say you're going to keep a fic short, and end up writing an insane amount of words for it. (I have not yet left my obligated long-ass comment on Chapter 4 of the College AU yet because I am still processing the fate/destiny concept.)

@tangledstarlight -> Gahh. Rosie. Please. This is going to sound a little repetitive considering I just screamed at you last night, but now I guess I will just have to publicly confess my adoration for you!!! Thank you for being my first online friend in a very long time, and for putting up with me yelling at you about everything (and also nothing at the same time). I can't believe all it took was one message about your Royals AU for you to post it, but I will gladly take that credit any day. You are so so so incredibly talented with your writing, and your ability to transport me to another world while I read your fics is unparalleled. I adore the way you can come up with a new story to write every day, and then proceed to throw it into your pot of other WIPs. I am so so so so lucky to have gotten to know you and am incredibly grateful that I now have someone to cry about everything with 🧡 (If you read anything from Rosie, you need to read her Seasons/Long Distance Juke "friendship" fic and the Reggie x Photography oneshot that made me bawl my eyes out.)

@thedeathdeelers -> No thoughts. Just soulmates. Jk jk, you know I love your Reggie x Ray x Carlos fics, and I will scream in the tags about it until the day I get more of those fics from you. This is lowkey a threat, but wrapped in kindness. You are so wonderful to see on my dash (albeit scary at times because of the sheer amount of headcanons and theories running through your head), but you radiate such positive energy that it's impossible to not want to jump in and scream about soulmates with you.

Some special mentions to fics that also live rent free in my head:

@sunsetsandcurves wrote a Willex Cruise Ship AU inspired by a Simple Plan song and it’s something I never knew I needed until I read it.

@phantom-curve wrote a Juke fic based off of Coney Island and I would just like to say, yes, it did shatter me. (Here’s the fluff sequel that makes up for it though)

@unsaidjulie wrote the Juke dog fic of my dreams and I simply cannot express how much I want the Molina’s to have a dog now.

@pawprinterfanfic managed to get me incredibly invested in a Star Wars AU even though I know absolutely nothing about Star Wars. I just know that I would die for two (2) space boys.

@sanssssastark your Later universe made me realize that I do very much want there to be more mature content for this fandom (and you constantly deliver).

@theobligatedklutz wrote a Tangled Willex AU that makes me screech every time there’s an update. Just read it.

@alexthedrummerboy your talent knows no bounds when it comes to your Social Media AU. Also she’s written ORIGINAL songs for Alex and Willie?!?!?!

@gennified has this really wonderful modern take on pride and prejudice for Willex and I’m so obsessed with how much miscommunication there is.

@bananaleaves okay, I just found your Tumblr today, and I know you don’t know me in any capacity, but allow me to scream about THIS FIC RIGHT HERE. If anyone in this fandom is to read ANYTHING, it’s this fic. This was one of the best things I’ve read in a long time and absolutely wrecked me. Please just read this.

This turned out WAY longer than it was supposed to, and I’m SO SORRY. (I also tried to make sure I got everyone’s pronouns right, so PLEASE let me know if they’re wrong!) A final sincere thank you to everyone in this fandom who writes. Your talent knows no bounds. Gonna stop talking now before this becomes an essay....

#jatp fanworks appreciation week #fic rec #if i realize that i've missed someone i'm gonna bite the bullet and send an ask to you okay. i will not let my anxiety STOP ME FROM #YELLING HOW MUCH I LOVE PEOPLE'S WRITING!!#idk what else to tag this other than i genuinely think this show saved my mental health and so have all the fic writers.#gonna post this now before i chicken out oky aklfwjepofae #motivation monday

49 notes · View notes

bitchiha · 4 years

Note

hii can you write some detailed nsfw headcanons for kakashi or just write a smut fic i love your writings so i wanted to ask if u could do it or not!

Is it wrong to pick up strange girls at a bar? (Kakashi x Reader)

A/N: you asked and you shall receive! The setting is based of A Little Death — the Neighbourhood. Just cause I liked the idea and I wanted to go with it, here’s a link to the song. The reader is basically a Kakegurui character but make it sexual intercourse <3 Kakashi wasn’t originally supposed to be a sub but I wanted to write sub naruto boys at some point so here it is.

Summary: Kakashi meets a mysterious stranger at a bar and things escalate quickly and he takes her back to his motel. After all, is it wrong to pick up strange girls at a bar?

Warnings: drinking, NSFW, sub!Kakashi, dom!reader, harsh degradation (male recieving) so i re wrote this five million times and I can’t torture myself with doing another edit of it so let’s say it’s edited half assedly

In the shitty little town you lived in the only exciting thing it had to offer was the bar.

It was a town used as a resting stop for travellers. People stopped for the night to recharge before continuing on their way to their actual destination in the morning. Many interesting people came in and out, but all the boring ones stayed put. There was no excitement in your family, in your friends, in your neighbourhood… the only time you ever felt even a lick of the feeling was when you were in that bar.

Not a lot of locals drank there, to them the idea of a public drinking place was disgusting and avoided it like the plague, even going as far as to try and ban the joint. To their disappointment, the bar was the main attraction to the travellers, making it difficult to shut down. The frequent travellers insistance to keep it open was solid proof for your thesis; it was the only good thing about this place.

You were one of the few locals that didn’t avoid the bar. How could you when the only exciting people you met were from that joint? Like that woman obsessed with being a bride, or the Taijutsu master in the green stretch suit, or that boy who declared to you that true art was an explosion!

Those were the kind of people you met there, the kind of people you wanted to be with. The only ones who could make you feel like you were breathing, feel like you were human — if that was even possible anymore. God, it felt like every day you spent in this town you lost a little more of your sense of self...

You’re sat there now. In the dim light of the bar on one of the cracked vinyl stools, toying with your empty glass. The bar tender would shoot you a look in a few minutes grunting to “either buy another drink or get out,” but if you were being honest, you didn’t have that much cash on you right now and you hadn’t intended to buy another glass. You see, you had planned to leave earlier with someone new you’d meet at the bar, but no one had yet to ignite that bubbling excitement within you.

You were beginning to get impatient, there was an undeniable need growing in you and it was clawing at your insides, begging you to give it a release. But Monday’s were always slow and you were starting to realize that you may have to wait a little longer than you could bare-

The door to the bar opened and your heart lurched with that desperate craving upon the sight of the man walking through the doorway. Just when you were about to lose hope, you were given your wish. Your body instantly perked up, drinking in that cool manner that he walked with; like he new he was something special, in whatever aspect that may be. He wasn’t flaunting it, no— rather he was just conscious of the fact. Confident.

He had unruly silver hair and the same green vest plastered to his body that the Taijutsu master you met did. He also had a headband on his forehead concealing one of his tired eyes. Upon further inspection you declared that the insignia was the symbol of the Leaf — so he was a shinobi then... He sat down a few chairs away from you.

Quietly, you counted four vinyl coated barriers between you and to your dismay, he had yet to notice you. Instead, he slumped against the table and mumbled an order to the bar tender. You turned your head to look at him again, your fingers tapping against your empty glass. Oh boy, just looking at him made your entire body thrum with that feeling, that exhilarating eagerness pumping through your veins… excitement.

You felt that familiar intoxicating passion swimming through your body a hundred times stronger than you’ve ever experienced before. There was that familiar bitter feeling between your legs and you clenched your thighs together. He was handsome — anyone could agree on that and you just couldn't wait to toy with him.

Shifting like a curious cat on your barstool, you studied the stranger further. Your movement finally stirred his attention and he turned his head ever so slightly, looking at you for the first time that night. His expression echoed your own curiosity mildly before the bartender slid him his drink, ice clanking in the cup.

You were never one to be shy around strangers, that’s something everyone in the town disliked you for, among other things... But you didn’t think about that as you slid a seat over, giving him a cat-like grin. You chose him for your entertainment tonight, wanting to toy with his cocky attitude until you could swat him around with your paws like a ball of yarn. Like you did with all the ones before him.

“So you’re a Leaf Shinobi, huh?” You asked, taking advantage of his attention, watching him stir his drink. You perched your elbow on the table and balanced your chin on your palm.

“Yeah,” the silver haired ninja smirked a little at your interest, “why so curious?”

You shrugged, “You said it yourself, this bars the only exciting thing in this town. A girls gotta find some kind of amusement, don’t ya think?”

“So I’m amusing to you?”

“Mhm,” you chirped, glad he was entertaining you— albeit a little disinterestedly, but you could work with it... “now go on, what’s it like?”

He was silent for a second. Contemplating before dodging your question, coming off a little distant. “How ‘bout I buy you a drink?” He slid a seat over.

You took his suggestion with a grin, brushing off how he ignored your previous sentence, “Oh! What a gentleman!” You beamed before turning to the bartender, “a vodka and sprite.”

The bartender sighed defeatedly, unable to kick you out of the bar now that the stranger offered you a drink. You were always too damn chatty. The silver haired man snickered at your choice of drink, causing you to gasp at him in mock offense, making him crack the smallest smile.

“What are you laughing at?” You scoffed playfully, once again sliding a chair over. Your arm gliding against the sleek wood table as you did so. Taking your seat, the bartender counted a single chaired gap between his two customers.

“And what are you drinking?” Your voice teasing as your fingers wrapped around his cup and before he had the chance to process your actions you brought the liquid to your lips, tasting its contents and wincing dramatically, “God. Who let you drink that?” You sent an accusing glance at the bartender, who was working on your own drink.

He heard the accusation and lifted a finger with half hearted annoyance, “You’re dangling on my last nerve, y/n.”

So that was your name. Y/n. Kakashi decided he could have some fun real good fun with you tonight. From what you’ve told him, you’re a local in this town, but by the way you dressed he could tell you weren’t like the other people in this place. Wearing that tiny jean skirt and that little top, you were definitely just twenty-one, or maybe twenty-two and certainly not as conservative as the other villagers.

He let himself wonder, as his fingers soaked into the condensation of his glass, how any of them let you out in an outfit like that. Perched a barstool with your leg crossed lazily over the other you looked more dangerous than any enemy he had encountered today.

Before he knew what he was doing, his body was moving him to close the single chaired gap between you two. Sitting on the cracked vinyl, sliding his drink over with him, he simply shrugged at your question and deflected it with a new one.

“And who let you out in that little skirt?”

The two of you maneuvered through the damp halls to whatever room number was engraved on the rusty key Kakashi held (you finally learning his name after some prying.) He slurred something stupid to you as you stumbled along and tilted your head to laugh.

After some drunken fumbling, your beloved stranger managed to unlock the door, pulling you inside in the process. The room was as clean as expected for a cheap room in a shitty motel, but you didn’t bother studying it. You’ve been here countless times before.

You found yourself being pushed up against the door, as Kakashi reached for his headband, pulling it off as you worked at pulling his mask down, your painted nails grazing his skin. Once you tugged the fabric down and his headband clattered to the floor, you marvelled at the sight of his face in its proper glory, burying your hands in his hair as you did so. It was even more alluring in its barest form and there was another wave of excitement surging through your body.

Licking your lips you leaned forward, hands tangling in his hair to connect your mouths for the first time. Teeth grazed against teeth and tongues clashed against tongues in what seemed to be an equally matched fight for power. It was a breath stealing, desperate kiss that lasted for what felt like hours, but could have only been a minute. The kiss had been so invasive that there were sleek strings of saliva connecting your lips, but neither of you moved to wipe them away.

Instead you leaned your head against the wall, his face barely a hair from yours as you both panted. Then in a matter of seconds you were on eachother again, this time the man took to taking your clothes off. Slipping your top off as you began to climb out of your shoes, him doing the same. Leaving you in a bra and your skirt, he started grabbing at your thighs, hoisting them up as he began to move you to the bed. What an eager boy.

When he felt his knees hit the beginning of the mattress, he let his grip on you go, causing your body to fall back. Your arms still around his neck taking him down with you, your back falling onto the mattress as he towered ontop of you. He removed his lips from yours as he began to trail kisses up to your earlobe, tugging at it firmly before licking right up the shell of it.

“How many people have you done this with?” he spoke into your ear, it was a question he was dying to know. Was he gonna be the first? Maybe the second? He liked that idea, liked the prospect of using an all too curious girl for his own pleasure—

“Lots of ‘em, too many to count... but dont take it personally.” What.

He scoffed surprised at your statement, lots? How much is lots? Kakashi felt his ego take a little hit, was he just another person you used for your own desire... He had used many people for his own sake, but he had never had the tables turn on him, until now of course. “The hell is that supposed to mean?” The sound echoed through the shell of your ear and you giggled at the feeling and his voice came out more hurt then upset, which pissed him off even more. Oh how adorable, was the big, strong shinobi’s ego getting hurt?

“Well, You like excitement dont you?” You waited for him to nod an annoyed yes, “Good boy, so we’re on the same track here... Do you know what that’s like to live with a bunch of fucking prudes?” This time you didn’t want for a response, “None of them would even step foot in that bar. Not people like you though and when I saw you I could just feel it... the good fuck could get out of you. I’m gonna have so much fun, we’re gonna have so much fun.” He gave you a surprised look, your mask was slipping and your true colours were shining through and his reaction only egged you on to continue. Did he really think this was some sort of spur of the moment act, that coming here with him was spontaneous.. something special? Oh God, what an idiot..

You pushed at his shoulders, causing him to fall onto his back, allowing you to crawl on top of him. Straddling him, you let your hand to push underneath the fabric of your jean skirt. He stared wide eyed, shocked at how your demeanour was slowly changing. Is the idiot finally getting it now, is he finally understanding his place? “They would never do this. They’d never touch themselves, not like this...” Your fingers dragged along your slit, preparing to access your digits to access to your dripping slit. “But it’s so much fun isn’t, oh and it just feels so good.” As your digits slipped into your enterance your mouth fell open, letting a small moan carelessly fall as you began to push in and out of yourself.

All Kakashi could do was stare up at you. Holy fuck. Were you masturbating ontop of him? The motel room, the look you made, the lewd sounds, all of it.. all of it was like something straight out of the books he read and the fact it was happening to him in real time was beginning to make him short circuit.

“What, You really want to act all shy now, what happened to practically sucking my face off? You brought me back here to fuck, not to blush at me like a virgin.” You said, lifting your skirt with your free hand, giving him a picture to go along with the sounds he was hearing. Upon that sight he made the discovery that you weren’t wearing any panties. “I bet you think about this shit all the time, don’t you? Ngh — You like thinking about girls like this, huh? If you didn’t bring me back here with you, you’d probably be jacking off to the thought of me like some kind of pervert...”

He couldn’t help the red colour invading his face. When he was in bed with girls he was usually the one saying all the dirty stuff, so having you spew all this vulgarity at him was shocking. But what was even more so was the twitching of his cock in his excruciatingly right pants.

He could tell by the face you were making that you were getting close to your own release, the look of embarrassment on his face only fueling your desire even more. Fingers curling and filling your pussy fast and eagerly, thumb moving to flick at your clit. Your tongue was starting to slip out of your open mouth now and he watched the little dribble of saliva coursing down it, your eyes starting to lull to the back of your head — it was that look. That fucking look that he read a hundred times over in the pages of his novels. He felt like he was going to cum just staring at you. But, oh god — were you gonna cum? By yourself? Right now?

Finally being able to move his body, he grabbed your wrist from under your skirt, the lewd sound of your digits leaving your soaked core made his mind all the more foggy. You didn’t complain, the pleasure built up in your core was only intensifying with the anticipation that he was going to be the one between your legs now.

But you wouldn’t tell him that. No, it was too fun to toy with his confidence. “Huh, You think you can make me cum better then my fingers? Hm, Let’s hope I’m not disappointed.” Those words definitely pricked at his ego, but he didn’t have time to mull them over as you began to crawl towards his face.

“You know, you don’t really talk too much, or maybe it’s just cause your a fucking pussy whipped whore...” Kakashi’s face gets redder at the insult. Did you just call him a whore? And why did he like it?

Your breasts bounce in your bra as you moved further up his body. “Lets just see if your mouth is good at something.” You said with dramatic exasperation and before his brain could process it, your thighs were straddling the sides of his head, pushing your core right onto his face.

Kakashi’s reaction was a bit delayed, it was only when your skirt fell over your thighs, trapping him in like a curtain, that he registered the fact that you were now sitting on his face. That and the fact that your pussy was practically suffocating him with your impatience.

He had never felt this much desire to please a woman. You were being so intoxicatingly rough with him that he found his mind only swimming with thoughts of you. Y/n, y/n, y/n. The strange girl he met at a bar. The girl who fingered herself ontop of him and was moaning like a pornstar. The feeling of your wetness already dripping down his chin, ready to be tasted... All of it was tattooing itself into his subconscious.

“Do you need me to say go?” You spat impatiently in the most tantalizing tone, it caused Kakashi’s cock to stir again. However, the words snapped him out of his frozen state and he began to desperately suck at your clit, the wet sounds echoing off the jean curtain and he felt his hips involuntarily buck into the air at your taste.

You felt the movement of his bucking hips and it his embarrassment you refused to let it go. “Oh! So you are a pussy whipped slut? You act so confident but the minute I sit on your face you lose control, just like a good whore.”

As if insulting him turned you on, your mouth began to flow with the most sinful noises and for a second Kakashi thought he was trapped in some fucked up porno. When I’m reality that excitement that had been building inside of you had been finally getting an appropriate release and you were never one to hold back your pleasure.

It felt like your veins were gushing at this point, so much so it felt as though they could burst at any second. You were just so excited and his tongue was so good.. The muscle pushing in and out of your hole, his tongue brushing against your clit as he wriggled as far as he could into your pussy.

Faintly, behind the throbbing in your ears you could hear frustrated fists against the door. They were undoubtably an angry guest that had been awoken by your loud noises, probably a pervy old man too. But you didn't give a fuck and Kakashi was too busy trying to make you cum to care either. Soon enough the banging had either blended into the noise you two were already making or the perv gave up to go jerk himself off.

“You’re licking me like a fucking dog, you’re so desperate to make me feel good.. its fucking sad.” There was no mistaking the vibration of the mans mouth on your clit, he had just moaned. As if that weren’t telling enough you could practically feel the embarrassed heat of his face on the squishy flesh of your inner thighs.

After another sinful noise barged past your lips you found yourself hurtling quite quickly towards your climax. Losing the little ounce of pity you had for mercilessly using Kakashi’s face, you began to grind onto it. Everything was beginning to feel more heightened now. The booming sound of your heart slamming in your chest, the throbbing of your veins, the feeling of Kakashi’s mouth sucking at your clit.

You didnt even bother to heed the man a warning as you came with a loud moan, all over his face. He wasn’t shocked, afterall he finally seen your true colours and he wouldn’t have put it above you to enjoy his surprised face flushed with your own juices. He felt his arms move from their position on your hips to snake under your skirt and wipe it off—

“Don’t fucking wipe it off.”

After catching your breath, you climbed off his face and stared down at the mess you made. Your hair began to fall over your features, but he could distinctly see the sick smirk on your face before you lent down and licked a line from his chin to his cheek, collecting some of your slick off of him. Then you moved back up again, watching his still blushing face stare at you with wide eyes.

“Y/n-“ But you weren’t listening as you climbed off the bed entirely.

Though your own excitement had been suppressed, you weren’t going to leave Kakashi to finish himself off. You liked to consider yourself a good girl, at least a little bit..

“You were so well behaved, weren’t you? Do you want to cum too?” Were you really about to make him beg? Yes you were. “Come on, use your words little shinobi, why don’t you tell me what you want?” The way you spat that word out belittled him in ever sense and he couldn’t help but buck his hips again.

He felt so embarrassed, but the nights events have had him desperately straining his pants and his normal thoughts were in a far away land. The only thing he could process was the bitter ache in his pants and the sticky substance on his face.

“I-I want to cum too.”

You smirked at him from the edge of the bed. You usually expected a please at the end of the sentence but you weren’t gonna make him suffer anymore. You pat the edge of the matress as a sign for him to shuffle down. He did so eagerly and you began to fumble with his zipper.

“Be a good boy and I’ll let you.”

#naruto shippuden #naruto #naruto headcanons #naruto imagines #naruto x reader #kakashi hakate #kakashi headcanons #kakashi x reader #kakashi fanfiction

192 notes · View notes

nottonyharrison · 3 years

Text

I’ve seen this post going around the Good Girls fandom this morning, and as it’s a small community with a lot of people new to regular fandom interaction I thought I would take a moment to discuss my own experience with being a one time popular content creator.

This might get long so putting it under a cut

For starters, this isn’t going to be about fic (well some of the stuff was sort of fic I guess but it’s not as you may think of it), however fanartist experiences can be very similar to authors, particularly in regards to the expectations your audience places on your content.

A few years ago I made a piece of fanart which I sat on for a while. I liked the concept, so I made some more that were in the same vein, and ended up creating a sideblog to post them on. The first piece gained some traction, and within two weeks of starting the blog and posting regularly, it had over 10,000 followers.

That’s when the problems started. I never intended or expected my work to have thousands of notes, and it was daunting. Not only did I suddenly have to deal with multiple messages demanding well thought out responses, but I was also receiving messages telling me other places on the internet my work had been reposted without my permission. I bought into this for a while, as I was excited to have made something that resonated with people, and I was loving the attention after years of creating middling content.

I started creating more and more content. I was posting three times a week. I was taking requests and trying to figure out ways to get other people’s headcanons into the little AU I had created. I became obsessed with tiny details and perfecting every tiny thing. I was having fun.

Within a few months though, I was over it. My work was popping up on listicles. I had been interviewed by the website of a popular tech magazine, and received a massive amount of biased and disgusting hate by fanboys who didn’t like that a woman had made something they were seeing all over the internet. I was accused of being a racist for doing a black and white edit featuring men of colour. I was accused of being an anti for refusing to post shipper content featuring a character I wasn’t interested in. I was accused of not creating enough fanservice content and told it was my obligation as a popular content creator to do it (I shit you not). I was accused of being a misogynist for not posting enough work with women in it. I started receiving asks demanding I go back to posting as regularly as I had in the early days of the blog, which I had started when I had a lot more free time on my hands. I had people posting on their blogs that I had ignored their ask because I didn’t want to deal with the accusation they had pointed at me, sometimes within an hour or so of sending it when I was literally in bed asleep.

I became obsessed with finding any website my work appeared on, and reading the comments so I could get ahead of any criticism to formulate a response before I received it directly. This negative interaction (which to be clear, was mostly unfounded and sent exclusively by people who didn’t understand the core purpose of the blog, or were just being trolls), caused me to start hating what I had created.

I went on a hiatus for six months.

That hiatus turned into a year with maybe one post. Since then, I have only created around 6-8 more pieces of work for that blog, and while it still has a lot of followers, most of them are inactive or minimal in their interaction, so I get a few reblogs and more likes, but overall the interaction is average. The fandom isn’t dead, but it’s certainly not at the heights it was in 2013 (no it’s not superwholock).

What’s the point of all this? I guess it’s to say that being a popular creator is a double edged sword. Yes, you get lots of interaction and often that can be incredibly inspiring and exciting. It’s nice to have your ego boosted, let’s be honest! It’s trite to say ‘don’t worry about how many comments you get’ because they do matter to a lot of people - including me. Validation matters.

But when your work is huge and the volume of interaction you’re getting includes people who might have normally ignored your work (e.g. a fic that someone reads because it’s that One Popular Story but the summary/tags aren’t really for them), it can come with problems including people trolling because they’re jealous or just plain mean, holding you to some kind of morally superior standard as if you’re a canon creator, or sending you asks that you spend hours agonising over the response for in fear of saying something tumblr deems to be Problematic™.

So I guess what I’m trying to say I learned some things from going through this experience, and I would like to share them with you

You are not obliged to respond to anyone who criticises you, regardless of if that criticism has merit. It may be valid criticism, and if so it is important to listen and consider it in the future, but you are not obliged to publicly post the response on your blog. Respond to people privately, and if they’re on anon they’re probably sending it because they know your only way to reply is to do it in public. Also, be prepared for any private responses to be screenshotted and posted because yes people will do that.

Never read the comments outside of posts on your own account or posts you’re tagged in by friends

If you need to abandon something it’s okay, you have no obligation to your followers. Stepping away can sometimes make you fall back in love with your work, and give you a new direction or different perspective.

Ending up on listicles sucks because it takes your work out of context.

If you do read comments on someone else’s post, don’t interact, or vagueblog about it. It’s not worth your energy.

Being someone who creates work that sits in the middle ground of fandom popularity is a very nice place to be.

Bowing to demands is a great way to set yourself up for burnout.

Your life situation changes, and you are under no obligation to create at the same frequency as previous.

Sometimes you will regret something you create, or you will view it differently over time. Learn from it and move on, don’t overanalyze it.

Don’t post your stuff on Reddit.

That’s it. I’m not sure what the point of all this was, but I just had a reaction when I read that post something in it just resonated with me.

#on fandom #my experiences #just to be clear this is not unsolicited advice #this is my story #and my experience #and the things I learned for me and may not apply to you

10 notes · View notes

lilyhoshikawa · 3 years

Note

aaaaaaand jupiter!!!!

– Overall opinion of them

Goooosshhh I love this girl so much ok, she’s so deep and interesting and there’s so much to her?? So during the stream we did I had been looking for an opportunity to say this but there are just so many symbolically powerful character details abt her, so many relatable elements and so many details that just speak to me on a really profound level, that strike me and stand out to me, and when I tried to speak up it came out as like “everything about her is so good” and it was a little awkward dhdjdjdj. I really can’t do it justice but the ENTIRE red ending lives in my head rent free at this point.

– Gender/sexuality headcanons

The game makes it pretty obvious she’s a lesbian, and I also think she’s trans, not just for self indulgent reasons but I think there’s a lot of support for it kind of. The general obsession with distance, with touch, the fear of being touched, the fear of letting someone experience her body in a physical way. It reads both as touch starvation and dysphoria. Also, the fact that she’s allowed to wear pants at a hyper-religious summer camp with strict rules abt gender and sexuality, and the fact that Neptune wears a skirt. I think it’s possible she transitioned early on with cautious support from her parents (her dad probably backed her up and pushed for her) and from that point the need to not let people close became even more important.

– Favorite moment in canon

The entire Red Ending… but in particular, just. The fact that the catalyst for it is her breaking her hair tie. Holy shit. Oh my god.

– Favorite moment in a fanwork

Sadly I have not read any WKTD fanwork…… YET. Me and vane and maybe Luna gotta get on writing some ASAP…

– Favorite line, in canon or otherwise

God, her entire speech from the red ending?? Dbdjbdjdb. In particular I keep thinking about the line “won’t you let me feel like a real devil for a moment?”

– Characters I love seeing them interact with

Obviously there are only two characters for her to really interact with, and they’re both great. I’m sad that her relationship with Venus isn’t explored more tho bc there’s a lot of potential and I think a lot of overlap between them that doesn’t exist with Neptune, a lot they have in common that I think she lacks, which is really interesting and makes for fun scenes.

– Last thing before sleeping headcanons

I feel like she hates going to bed and puts it off as long as possible. She takes awhile to do pre-bedtime stuff and then even after that tries to kill a little more time until she goes to bed, squeeze out every last bit of that valuable time before going to sleep. She probably ends by reading a book or checking her phone in bed.

– Sleeping habits headcanons

One line I really love from the game is when it’s describing how the girls sit around the bonfire, and they talk abt Jupiter “holding her whole body”. That desperate touch starvation and need to feel secure, feel held, feel comfortable in herself, and I think she probably sleeps like that too, clutching herself, balled up tight.

– First thing after waking up headcanons

The game relatably describes her as “bad at waking up” and I think she probably has a habit of sleeping through alarms, and getting woken up by someone else instead. She’s groggy most mornings and has to have an hour or two before she really gets going and has her energy hit.

– Favorite locations headcanon

She’s clearly the type of person who likes to y’know, climb trees and do risky stuff and explore nature. She’s also got a sort of half-desire to spend time alone, and she probably went and found someplace off the path from where she lives, some tiny forest clearing or nature trail by a public park that she can explore and run around in safely. The type of place you can spend hours in before it starts to get dark.

#goshhh #meme response #rambles

3 notes · View notes

smallblueandloud · 4 years

Note

hi essbie!! you seem super awesome❤️❤️ if you would like to talk to me about the west wing i would love that! i’m watching for the first time now and i’m in LOVE with it- tell me all your thoughts! otps, favorite episodes, arcs, characters... anything!

oh my god, this is my FAVORITE ASK THAT I HAVE EVER RECEIVED EVER. i’m so happy to talk about the west wing because the fandom that’s still alive today seems to be TINY (although high-spirited!!). thank you for asking!! i will endeavor to talk a lot.... which isn’t hard for me, lol.

(psst, before we begin, can i recommend you check out @donnajosh, who posts gorgeous new gifsets of tww pretty regularly [and also has gifs tagged by episode so you can find the right post to reblog when you’re liveblogging, shh], @etraytin, who’s written some AMAZING multichaps that have gotten me through this very stressful week, and @cassiesinsanity, who’s just plain genuinely amazing?? okay. now that that’s out of the way.)

i tried to figure out from your blog where you are in the show, but i can’t find anything more detailed than “probably has finished in the shadow of two gunmen”, so i’m just gonna keep things anti-spoilers. there are some really, really cool plot developments in tww, and i don’t recommend you spoil yourself for things on purpose! but also like. i DEFINITELY spoil things for myself all the time. so what the hell, don’t listen to me lol.

(i tried to put this under a cut, but tumblr glitched. sorry, peeps who don’t care about the west wing. also, WATCH THE WEST WING.)

my ALL TIME, dearest headcanon is adhd josh. i just. i love my boy so much. i love my impulsive, ridiculously-sensitive-to-perceived-rejection, loud, hyperfixated boy so much. i don’t know everything about adhd, but from what i know josh is TEXTBOOK. or at least he’s a lot like me! and i’m reasonably sure i have adhd. so. i’m REALLY, REALLY into that headcanon and everything about it. (i actually wrote a fic in which i wrote him the way i see his adhd presenting, because i love him so much. hmm, i should write a fic about josh being adhd. what kind of stims would josh like??)

i love and adore josh/donna, like many many other people. i like zoey/charlie, just because i think they make each other happy and both of them deserve that. i... like cj/danny? sorta? i think they’re adorable, and they have some REALLY good moments (no spoilers but. oh my god. danny really out here chugging his respect women juice and i love him for it). but also i am EXTREMELY ATTACHED to cj/toby and more specifically cj/toby/andy.

HEAR ME OUT. cj has EXTREME wlw energy and cj and toby have A LOT of married energy but then toby and andy... love each other so much, it’s so clear, in literally everything they do, i don’t know if you’ve gotten to the end of s5 yet but i cry. so like?? obviously, because i am who i am, polyamory is the answer! basically the rundown is: andy and toby are a typical couple except that they fight a lot. cj is kinda in the middle. if gay marriage had been legal / socially acceptable in the 80s (because god knows this ot3 has been thinking about optics since they graduated college), cj and andy would’ve gotten married and toby would’ve come and gone depending on who he’d pissed off recently, and everything would’ve been perfect. instead, andy and toby got married and it didn’t work because they really just couldn’t function as a unit, especially since their getting married meant that cj isolated herself a bit more. definitely cj and toby have a couple of SCREAMING arguments about the whole relationship. idk.

but just like. imagine with me, if you will, cj and toby... not dating, while working in the white house, but being exes. friendly exes. friendly exes who are still in love with each other and know it. please imagine that and then think about “i love you desperately / i know” and “you wanna make out with me right now, don’t you? / well, when don’t i?” and “we had it good there for a while / yeah, we did” and then join me in the pit of sadness.

(sidenote i have a sense8 au for the west wing and the second story is just me being emotional about their cluster for 5k. i have another story vaguely planned that i’ll probably never write about the development of the ot3 and about their cluster and how it functions. but don’t read that story until you finish... the first half of s7? or thereabouts? actually probably you should finish the show before you read the sense8 au in general if you’re avoiding spoilers.)

(when i say “i’ll probably never write”, i mean “until the next time i get obsessed with the west wing”. which will probably be years from now. oh, well, we can all hope the muse actually does something efficient for once.)

so yeah. those are my ships. i know a lot of people shipped josh/sam, but i don’t really see it? sam always seemed Way Too Straight for that to work lol, although i DO like the idea of sam pining tragically for josh for years just like donna does. (can you tell i read such a winter’s day a few days ago? it’s amazing. i haven’t left a review yet because i have not been a human being recently, but go read it!! it’s awesome!!)

also, i love the idea of bartlet/abbey/leo, although i can’t really visualize it lol. but there’s some amazing fic for them out there. maybe one day my stupid brain will realize the angst potential and actually let me write something for them, hopefully within the sense8 au. (sam also has a cluster! and i would love to write about them! .....but my brain doesn’t do what i tell it to. ever.)

my favorite arc.... i don’t know. i really loved the early seasons, which were a little more episodic, but ALSO i actually really liked the tone after aaron sorkin left after s4? it takes some getting used to, but it’s WAY more emotional, and i am ALL HERE FOR THAT. i definitely have a least favoite arc, or at least a least-favorite way-that-they-handled-a-storyline (spoiler alert: i hated how they handled the end of bartlet’s presidency in the white house. like. SHE’S ALL ALONE IN THERE- anyways. trying not to give detailed spoilers!)

favorite episodes: hmm. i love the thanksgiving episodes. i loved any episode with the ainsley-and-sam dynamic. noel is a phenomenal episode. 26 could make anyone weep. the flashbacks are the best. the fucking- the fucking what’s next motif.

honestly, probably i’d have to say my favorite episode is either 4x20 (evidence of things not seen, for “stupidly noble cluster” reasons and cj/toby reasons and bartlet & charlie reasons. also i feel like there’s some good josh/donna there too but i can’t remember exactly?) or 7x21 (institutional memory, because i’m pretty sure the writers reached into my id and pulled out EXACTLY what i needed from them to be okay with the show ending. jesus CHRIST i have never felt so satisfied after an episode. literally everything i ever could have wanted happened in that episode. i’m STILL reeling. it’s a perfect episode.)

my favorite characters are... literally everyone? i know that’s cheating but i love them all SO MUCH (except mandy and amy, of course). josh is my favorite, always and forever, but i love cj more than words and sometimes i can’t breathe for love of toby. leo and bartlet and charlie and sam and donna- here i was thinking i was gonna resent will forever but i LOVE will. ainsley is an amazing woman. abbey is such a good character, god, talk about a flawed woman who’s allowed to be a good person.

AND THEN THEY MADE ME ROOT FOR A REPUBLICAN. again, i doubt you’ve gotten to s7, but the republican nominee in the last election... jesus christ. i love that man so much. arguably, i’m very biased, but also how D A R E they expect me to root against him. how DARE.

(i swear this will make more sense once you meet him. i just love the actor a lot, okay?)

anyways. this got ridiculously long. i would LOVE to talk about the west wing with you, feel free to reblog this with your own thoughts or tag me in your own post or message me or something. i would love to hear your reactions!! it’s such a good show, and such a smart show, and every character is so mcfreaking good at what they do and i adore it. enjoy the ride because there’s nothing as perfect and as quality as the west wing. if you’ll please excuse me, i’m going to go cry about 7x21 again.

11 notes · View notes

thechoir-roomhq · 4 years

Text

WELCOME TO THE CHOIR ROOM, JAZMINE EVANS (alisha boe fc),

here is your schedule! you have twenty-four hours to turn in your account and post an intro. good luck and have fun with the semester!

[ALISHA BOE, FEMALE, SHE/HER/HERS] who’s that? oh it’s {JAZMINE EVANS}. i hear they’re {SIXTEEN} and a {JUNIOR} at {WMHS}, have a voice like {paige} and are part of {New Directions, Girls Soccer Captain}. they’re known to be {AFFECTIONATE, HARDWORKING} and {CODEPENDENT, SARCASTIC}. some people say they remind them of {a gentle ukulele ballad, oversized sweaters and hoodies, nighttime adventures through lima’s thrift stores, bedroom posters of kpop idols, soccer cleats in every hue}. only one way to find out! [herman, 21, he/him/his, US Mountain Standard Time]

PLEASE LIST AT LEAST THREE DETAILED HEADCANONS BELOW

Jazmine is a child of the internet. Unabashedly so. She spends her nights streaming the newest season of Love Island or the endless list of anime her “internet friends” have recommended for her. As much as she loves hanging out with her classmates, if given the opportunity she would absolutely cut them all off for a night alone with her laptop and her apple tv. As such, many of her references and jabs are from the media she consumes. She affectionately refers to her sibling as the “Buford” to her “Baljeet”

Jazmine was a relatively shy kid. For a really long time, the only people that she would speak to were her sibling and her parents. Sam had the idea to put her in coed soccer and the tiny shy girl quickly shed away. She’s been playing ever since she was 6 years old and doesn’t ever plan on stopping. She’s pretty good too, she thinks she might actually have a chance of playing for a college team. She plays midfield and is known for her stamina and ball handling. She takes staying in shape for soccer pretty seriously and even goes to the gym on days she doesn’t have practice.

As close as she is with her mom, she’s miles more chummy with her dad. He completely feeds her nerdy and goofy obsessions with the best movie recommendations. Sunday nights are always reserved for daughter-daddy time so that they can binge anything with superheroes or science fiction adventures that they can get their hands on.

In terms of singing, Jazmine was definitely a late bloomer. Her friends and junior high school heard her mother’s old songs and immediately pestered her about it. She realized that she never really tried to sing…even though she had a great ear for music. Her boyfriend at the time convinced her to sing a duet with him at a talent show. Seeing the look on her parents’ face in the crowd, the shock of her friends when they realized what a unique sound she had….it was kinda life changing. Jazmine started watching endless YouTube videos of singers, learned to play Ukulele, and even asked her mother for lessons from time to time. By high school she was more than confident enough to audition for New Directions and she’s really glad that she did.

It could be argued that Jazmine is a serial monogamist. As independent as she could be, years and years of consuming romantic drama narratives have ensured that she’s a hopeless romantic for life. She loves getting to know people and growing beside them. She’s actually quite nervous about this school year because it’s the very first time that she’s started a school year not being in a relationship. She wants to challenge herself to be her own woman for once…but she has a feeling she’s one cute encounter away from breaking her streak.

#accepted #glee #glee rp #glee rpg #alisha boe #alisha boe fc #submission

2 notes · View notes

lj-writes · 6 years

Text

Rey’s abandonment and the destruction of Luke’s new Jedi: A deconstruction

Warning: I have no idea if I’ve stumbled on to something here or am just pounding sand, but IF I’m right you’d be depriving yourself of a hell of a twist by reading this. Also, I put this in the general TLJ tag because it’s speculation for that movie, but if you’re for or against particular parentage theories and/or ships read the tags before proceeding. There is also a lot of death, violence, trauma and disturbing imagery in this post and a mention of pedophilia (not in support of it, obvs) so exercise caution.

I keep reading theories and headcanons about how Rey was abandoned on Jakku after the destruction of Luke’s school for Jedi, and I find it compelling except for the big glaring timeline problems outlined below. I still feel drawn to the idea, though, and I’ll try to show that this may, in fact, be what happened. I will also discuss some other problems this theory may solve (why Jakku? who left her there?) and how this might put an entirely new spin on Kylo’s and Rey’s stories. Buckle in.

The timeline problem with Rey being left on Jakku after the school’s destruction is that the destruction took place years after Rey’s abandonment. We know that Ben had not yet fallen as of Claudia Gray’s Bloodline, six years prior to the events of The Force Awakens, and the destruction of the school happened after the events of Bloodline when Ben learned of his heritage–that he was the grandson of Darth Vader. By then Rey would have been thirteen years old, far too old to be the child shouting “Come back!”

Right?

Let’s stop right here and unpack the assumptions we’ve made. Here are the facts we know, or think we know, about the destruction of Luke’s school:

Assumption #1: The destruction took place after Ben switched his allegiance and became Kylo Ren.

Assumption #2: Kylo Ren’s fall took place in or after 28 ABY, after the events of Bloodline.

Assumption #3: Kylo Ren killed the Jedi students and destroyed the school.

What if none of these assumptions is true, at least without heavy qualification? It would change quite a lot of what we think we know about the characters and their backgrounds, that’s for certain.

I want to make this very clear, what would not change is the fact that Kylo Ren is a fascist enforcer and mass murderer. This entire post can be summarized as “Cool motive, still murder.” I’m simply wondering if the motive might be so cool that it changes the entire game.

All right, let’s dive in below the cut.

Assumption #1: The destruction took place after Ben switched his allegiance and became Kylo Ren.

Let’s start with the first assumption, that the destruction of the school happened after Kylo Ren’s fall, that is after the events of Bloodline in 28 ABY.

Well, what if I told you it may have happened a lot sooner than that? Impossible, right? I mean, it’s laughable! Anyone who read Bloodline or has a passing familiarity with the new canon materials knows that Ben was traveling across the galaxy with his master Uncle Luke, frequently out of communication with Leia and Han. I mean, if he’d already destroyed the school by this point how could he… be traveling… all the time…

Wait a minute. Is there proof that the school existed at the time of Bloodline? Luke certainly wasn’t acting like most schoolmasters if he was incommunicado much of the time. Why was he traveling so much if he had a school to run?

I combed through my e-book copy of Bloodline for different search terms–”Luke,” “school,” “Jedi,” “Temple,” “Ben” and so on. And while the book said Luke was a Jedi, duh, there was no reference to other Jedi, or to a Jedi school or Jedi Temple in current existence. This itself seems odd, since this was nearly thirty years after the Battle of Yavin, twenty-three years since the war with the Empire ended. Shouldn’t there be a new generation of Jedi already?

The closest reference I could find to the existence of other Jedi and the possibility of a school was this passage:

[Luke] Skywalker had been so long away on his strange quest for the lore of the Jedi that he no longer had much influence outside his own acolytes. He was a figure of myth more than one of flesh and blood.

So Luke has “acolytes,” which seems to hint at followers and possible graduates of his academy. Still, does it strike anyone as odd that he has so little influence? If he left these acolytes in charge of the school in his absence, presumably he would have more influence through these teachers and their own pupils. Yet that doesn’t seem to be the case, as though there had been some disruption that broke that chain.

I also talked to @absolxguardian, who unlike me has actually finished the book (and for the record is against my madcap theory so don’t blame her), and she confirmed that she does not recall a direct reference to a school. If you’ve found any, please inform me and we can all have a good laugh at how I was obsessing over nothing.

For now, if you want to come deeper down the rabbit hole with me, you’ll have to accept that there is at least some basis to think that Luke’s school was destroyed before 28 ABY, say, a little less than a decade earlier? Maybe prompting Luke to go away on his strange quest and fade into legend? Without that premise none of what comes below works.

Assumption #2: Kylo Ren’s fall took place in or after 28 ABY, after the events of Bloodline.

Let’s move on to Assumption #2, that Kylo Ren’s fall took place on or after 28 ABY, presumably after he learned that Vader was his granddad. You can see how grabbing and shaking Assumption #1 weakens Assumption #2 as well. If the school was destroyed long before 28 ABY and Ben had something to do with it, then clearly it wasn’t just the extra branch in the family tree that sent him over the edge. He had already gone over, or was at least hovering around the edge, for some time now.

But wait, it was Ben who was accompanying Luke on his travels to esoteric holy places. If the timeline went as I proposed above, how could he have fooled his uncle, a Jedi, so completely?

Jedi have been fooled before, though. That was pretty much the plot of the prequel trilogy. Maybe Ben was a manipulator on par with Palpatine or he wasn’t (he wasn’t), but he may have had a master manipulator on his side. That’s right. Snoke, the guy Leia says was watching Ben from the shadows and manipulating him.

One excellent way for Ben to be in his uncle’s good graces and not fall under suspicion was to bond over their shared tragedy, the destruction of the Jedi school–remember, acceptance is the price of entry to this rabbit hole!–and their status as traumatized survivors. What an act! Why, he must be as good an actor as Adam Driver to pull that off!

But what if it wasn’t all an act? Which brings me to the third assumption…

Assumption #3: Kylo Ren killed the Jedi students and destroyed the school.

This is the part that is going to get me anons, and possibly a defamation suit if I’m wrong and fictional characters can sue. Here’s where the cool motive part comes in, and may unravel all the pesky details of Rey’s abandonment that have been troubling me. Step deeper down the hole with me.

What if it wasn’t Ben who killed the students.

What if it was Rey.

Yes, tiny, maybe five-year-old Rey, with skinny arms and her piping child’s voice. That Rey. I told you this would get me anons.

I mean, why would she? Not out of malice, obviously. I don’t believe for a second Rey is a murderer, but rather a weapon. I haven’t worked out the exact mechanics, but much like my earlier Rey Solo theory, I think Snoke may have turned her raw power against the students, killing them. Maybe she was a student, maybe she was a visitor, but whatever she was there for that day, things turned deadly and it became a day of indelible tragedy.

Now that we’re far enough down the rabbit hole and know what we’re working with here, let’s take a freefall down Headcanon Shaft. It’s quickest, and hopefully entertaining, to tell it in fic form without all the qualifications and hedging, so bear with me. Just remember that I’m not telling a definitive version of this theory, simply presenting one way it could work.

A note on the relationship between Ben/Kylo and Rey: This theory works best with Rey Solo as Ben’s sister, but could also work for Rey Skywalker. It might even work with Rey Kenobi, Rey Random etc., though with a big dose of “why?” (One particular part of the headcanon only works if Rey is Vader’s granddaughter, but the theory could work without that part.) I will use the name “Rey” for the purpose of this headcanon, though as a theorist I prefer “Breha.”

I hope it will become clear, though, that even with Kylo and Rey being unrelated this version of events pretty much closes out the possibility of romance between them.

“One boy, an apprentice turned against him, destroyed it all.”

Rey is unconscious, having spent even her incredible powers. She looks so small among the wreckage and the other children and the adults who tried to defend them, with one difference–her chest rises and falls, where the others’ never will again.

Ben knows. He has gone from body to body, checking, searching, hoping. Now he kneels by Rey’s side, among the fragments of the world they used to inhabit.

But one thing is clear through the fog of shock and sorrow. This wasn’t Rey’s fault, and he has to protect her by any means necessary.

It’s at this point that his trusty advisor, this wondrous man who’s been teaching him so many secrets of the Force, whispers through their link that she can never live a normal life now, that the vengeful surviving Jedi will come for her and lock her away forever. She has to be hidden in a place where she can’t hurt others or attract attention.

But where? Ben asks, sobbing, cradling Rey’s tiny body in his arms. Her clothes, her skin, her hair are stained with the blood of other children, which he tries to wipe away only to smear it around.

Jakku, comes the answer, and Ben’s heart tries to both sink and lift at once. It is a place powerful in concentrated Force energies that will tamp down on Rey’s powers, keeping her and others safe. But it is so remote and far away, it’ll be just like losing her.

There is also no other choice if he wants to keep her free and others safe at the same time. He swears to her that he will clear her name, make the galaxy a safe place for her so that he can bring her back and she can once again live in her own name.

He must act quickly before the adults return. He burns the ruined school down so that Rey’s body will not be missed among the others, apologizing to the dead students and their families. The fire glints red off his tears.

Then he takes the Millennium Falcon, his father’s ship that his parents were using to visit, lays Rey in the back, and launches off. This time he apologizes to his father. He has a feeling he will be making a great many silent apologies in the years to come.

He uses a Force trick his friend teaches him to silence the memories from Rey’s mind. His heart aches again, but again he has no choice. If she remembers who she is she will try to make her way back, and all will be ruined. She could spend her life locked up, might hurt other people again.

Most of all, though, he doesn’t want her to have the memories he will carry for the rest of his days. Just sparing her that may be worth all of this.

She wakes up during the hyperspace jump and is confused but happy enough to chat perched in the copilot’s seat, though he can see she has no clear memory of him. He keeps her entertained by talking to her and distracting her with the old knick-knacks on the ship. He tells her they are taking a trip and will be home soon.

Once he lands on Jakku his will nearly gives out, but he has come too far and this is the only way. “Wait here,” he tells her, seized with the terror that she will wander away and he will never find her again. “I’ll come back for you! It will be all right.”

He exchanges the Millennium Falcon for a freighter with instructions to get rid of the ship, his heart bleeding at the thought of his father. He does not look back as he boards his new ship and leaves Jakku behind.

“Come back!” she screams, though he cannot possibly hear her at this distance through the hull of his ship. He makes the jump to hyperspace too soon, almost hoping to disintegrate. Her voice echoes through the Force for a long time.

He sends out a distress signal when he is safely away from Jakku. When found, he tells a story about how the school’s attackers kidnapped him and he managed to escape. He’s not sure how good it was. The adults, already ashen and dazed, likely do not have the heart to prod and have their world collapse on them once again. He knows what that feels like.

Over the years the secret expands inside him until it threatens to spew out every time he opens his mouth, so he stops talking. About anything that matters, anyway. Every time his mother goes expressionless and numb, every time his father travels away without word when he’ll be back, Ben grits his teeth and clamps down until his ears ring.

“I just never should have sent him away. That’s when I lost him.”

When Luke decides to seek the lore of the Jedi instead of rebuilding the school and asks whether Ben wants to come, he jumps at the chance. Home was becoming unbearable, and he has his own reasons to seek knowledge of the Force. Leia is hesitant but Ben persuades her to let him go. He needs to continue his training, he tells her, and Luke could use the backup. His father is all right with the idea. Ben doubts he even cares. He watches his mother spend her evenings alone and despises the man.

Ben has another reason to stay close to Luke’s side: He knows Luke wants answers about the night his school was massacred. That’s all right, though, with his friend to advise him Ben can find out ten times as much as Luke and stay ahead. And if Luke gets too close to the truth, Ben can kill him.

The first time the thought occurs to him it frightens Ben. Then it comes again, and again, and he grows used to it.

He often wonders during his travels whether Luke suspects anything. At night, when his uncle sometimes turns and cries out, he wonders if it wouldn’t be more merciful to end his misery. He certainly wishes someone would do him the same kindness.

He sleeps with a cloth stuffed in his mouth so he would not cry out something fatal in his sleep. He tries to picture Rey but cannot imagine what she might look like now.

“There was nothing we could’ve done. There was too much Vader in him.”

Almost a decade into their travels Ben is a man, and has learned a great deal but is no closer to solving Rey’s puzzle. Then Luke sits him down and tells him the truth about who he and his sister’s father was, throwing aside the lie they had been telling Ben, the galaxy, all these years.

Ben realizes at that moment that there will be no peace or freedom for Rey or for him. If the universe is to be made safe for Rey to reveal herself, there must be no Force users left to threaten her.

There is a way, his trusty friend tells him. Gentle and noxious as dust on the wind comes a name: The Knights of Ren.

It’s just as well. Once the killings begin they will think he was the Jedi Killer from the school, and it is no lie. That is what he will become, there was just a small time difference. It will make things better for Rey, and that is all that matters.

That night Ben leaves the camp. He looks back one more time at Luke’s sleeping face, troubled in the firelight. He toys with the idea of ending things here, but turns and leaves instead.

He might come to regret it, but regret has become an old, old friend. He is twenty-four years old.

In which I deal with a torrent of objections

If you’re still with me, you probably hate me. Let me answer a few of the possible objections and go into how this theory helps fit some of the puzzle pieces together.

But Ducain stole the Millennium Falcon from Han!

That’s what Han said. Who’s to say his information was accurate? In my version of this theory he and Unkar Plutt were told that story by the same person, Ben Solo.

But since there is evidently text in the incredible cross-sections book about Ducain refurbishing the gun turret while he had the Falcon, let me propose an alternate timeline: Ducain stole the Falcon from Plutt’s parking lot and kept it for a time, during which time he invested in the aforementioned enhancement. The Irving Boys stole it from him, and then Plutt stole it back. Han tracked the train of custody down as far as Ducain, so he assumed old Duc had stolen it directly from him.

Much as in my earlier Rey Solo theory, this version of events adds a layer of emotion and urgency to Han’s search for the Falcon. Since its disappearance is tied to the events at the school, Han would be looking for answers as well as the ship itself. It also explains why he seemed resigned but cool with (evidently) not having the Falcon in Bloodline but was super keen to find it in The Force Awakens: With the revelation of his son’s duplicity it became a much more urgent question for him.

So why didn’t Unkar Plutt get rid of the Falcon?

Does Unkar strike you as a good-faith kinda guy? Ben probably didn’t instruct him to keep Rey in a half-starved state of indentured servitude, either. Plutt also probably knew the ship and smelled a bigger payday down the road. (Anyone else getting a Cossette and the Thénardiers vibes?)

This theory is incredibly white-prioritizing, to have the entire plot and twists wrapped around these two characters and to creat this incredibly convoluted back story just to make Kylo seem sympathetic.

Yes, it is. Unfortunately, given the way Rian is talking I think that makes this theory or something like it all the likelier to happen.

It’s also sexist as fuck, to reduce Rey to an object to be used by Snoke and “saved” by Kylo Ren, and to inflict this undeserved trauma on her.

I completely agree. I hate it, actually, but it does seem to tie a lot of things together and… did I mention I hate it?

This is Reylo and I hate/love you for it!!

This is actually the most anti Reylo theory right up there with Rey Solo (which is likely to be true if something like this happens, because come on). Even if Ben did all this for a girl totally unrelated to him, which is unlikely, if this backstory results in a romance it would be the creepiest grooming bullshit of all time. It would be even worse than if Rey and Kylo had never met before TFA. It’s arguably abusive even without the romance aspect.

Speaking of which, JJ said Kylo and Rey never met!

So we’re into believing JJ now? Not only does he have a track record on this point, why the heck are you believing the cast and crew whose job (well, part of it) is to mislead you? He can always walk that comment back with “never met in this movie” and such.

There are a whole lot of other objections, but you’re too tired and on edge to think of them at the moment.

Correct. Have at ‘em in the asks, reblogs, comments etc. Keep your capslock on. We have to fill the time somehow until TLJ opens, right?

So is this theory actually good for anything?

I should hope so, since I’m staying awake until an ungodly hour to type it up. Here are some of its advantages, as I see it.

1. It gives Kylo Ren the sympathetic back story we were promised, but doesn’t make him a puppet or a secret good guy. It also shows the depth of Snoke’s manipulation while also giving Kylo Ren agency.

2. It explains the Millennium Falcon’s presence within sight of Rey all these years, for as long as she can remember according to Rey’s Survival Guide.

3. It gives emotional depth to Rey’s fascination with pilot imagery, which was also a big part of my previous Rey Solo theory but which never quite fit because I couldn’t think of how to make it emotionally satisfying on a visceral level.

Rey knew that she was waiting for a pilot, hence her sense of comfort from wearing a pilot helmet, keeping a pilot doll, doing flight sims and so on. While it’s unlikely Ben was in a Rebel flight suit there was plenty of Rebel and Empire paraphernalia to be found from the ruins of battle, and she may have made the association. Something probably told her it wasn’t an Empire pilot she was waiting for because oh, the irony…

4. It explains why Rey had to be left on Jakku, which just happens to be a pivotal place in the new canon. absolxguardian’s excellent Rey Palpatine theory also addresses this.

5. “WHAT GIRL?” Kylo Ren heard “Corellian YT model freighter” and “girl” and immediately made the connection. Under this theory, he was probably thinking the whole time about where Rey was in relation to his location and later the location of the search parties.

And remember how pissy he got with Hux about the droid being recovered, not destroyed? I mean I bet he’d love to have a chat with Uncle Luke and all, but was he also trying to set limits on how destructive the mission could be (as in, no bombing from orbit)? Of course it turned out to be plenty dangerous for Rey anyway, but I think we’ve established by this point that Kylo Ren is a master of intellectual and moral laziness, seeing only what he wants to see.

6. It explains Lor San Tekka and the Church of the Force’s presence on Jakku so near Rey in a “correlation is not causation” kind of way. They were there for the same reasons, Jakku’s being some kind of important Force spot. Rey’s presence did not cause San Tekka to be there, but it was also not a coincidence that they were there at the same time.

7. Speaking of which, “There’s been an awakening. Have you felt it?” This line was spoken after Rey left Jakku.

8. Then there’s this part of a deleted scene of Kylo searching the Falcon:

[Image description: Kylo Ren stands in the cockpit of the Millennium Falcon, hunched over and clutching the backs of the pilot’s and copilot’s seats]

See how he’s gripping the copilot’s seat closer with his right arm bent more than the left, almost like he has an arm around someone’s shoulders? Is he remembering the last time he saw little Rey in this chair? I always thought he looked like he was in some sort of pain here, and with my theory goggles on I the pain might have been even sharper and more immediate than I thought at first.

At the end of this cut he says to himself, “Han Solo.” But why? Did he really need to grab the seats to feel his father’s presence? Dude, I don’t have the Force and I could have told you it was Han just by looking at the damned ship. It’s the Millennium Falcon! That crashed through an impregnable shield! How much surer can you get, sniff the seats for Essence du Ford?

No, I don’t think the “Han Solo” line was him feeling his father’s presence. I think he was steeling himself for what he had to do. Yes, I’m going there. Yes, I do believe…

9. This theory explains why Kylo Ren “had” to kill Han. Again, this works best with Rey Solo, but could fit Rey Skywalker, Rey Random etc.

Think about it. He knew from early on from Snoke, in the “There’s been an awakening” scene, that Han was with Rey. Han had talked to her. He could have recognized her, especially if she was his daughter. Rey’s entire cover, the whole reason for Kylo’s existence for the past 15 years, was about to be blown.

Doesn’t that put Snoke’s comment in the earlier scene, that this was going to be a test such as Kylo had never faced, in a whole new context? Kylo knew it then, and he’s realizing it anew: It’s too soon for Rey to be known. Han has to go.

“I know what I have to do, but I don’t know if I have the strength to do it.” Kylo’s words to his father. If killing Han is for Rey’s protection, the idea that he “has” to do it takes on a whole new gutwrenching meaning.

The “Thank you” at the end might well have been genuine–thank you for dying to protect her. I won’t forget this.

And when Han touched his son’s face before he fell? He may well have realized the truth he may have suspected, what his son had been carrying all these years. It was monstrous, it was unthinkable, and yet he understood.

Because Han might have done the same.

10. From the novelization, when Rey catches the lightsaber: “It is you.”

11. “I’ve seen this raw strength only once before.”

What if it wasn’t Ben that Luke was talking about here, but Rey?

012. “Something inside me has always been there. But now it’s awake, and I need help.”

She sounds thrilled about what’s awakening in her, doesn’t she? Why is Rey so terrified of the Force, anyway?

13. “Let the past die. Kill it, if you have to. That’s the only way to become what you’re meant to be.”

Hmmmm

14. “Fulfill… your… destiny!”

HMMMMMMM

"This isn't going to go the way you think!"

I really don’t think Rey’s parentage is going to be the SHOCKING REVEAL we’ve been promised, not like Luke’s parentage in The Empire Strikes Back. The “I am your father!” line was shocking because we weren’t thinking about it and nobody saw it coming. If his parentage had been left as an open loop that fans had been given three years to obsess over, someone would have come up with Vader as the father because that’s dramatically appropriate. Or, you know, because everyone would have been Luke’s father by the time ESB rolled around.

With Rey, the parentage was teased from the first and fans have already come up with every theory under the sun and from where the sun don’t shine. That’s not a shocking reveal, it has to be handled for maximum emotional satisfaction and not for shocks.

The twist has to be something we’re not looking at, and we should be looking at Kylo Ren. The amount he has been talked up, the gushing about what a relatable villain he is, cannot be a coincidence even if it’s distasteful to me.

In this post I’ve presented several assumptions that fans have been holding without question, much like Luke’s father being a) dead and b) killed by Darth Vader. I showed how they can be twisted within the bounds of known canon. Whether I’m right or wrong about this theory, the actual twist is going to do something similar by tackling our unexamined assumptions and totally blindsiding us.

I hope you’ve found this exercise entertaining, whatever the twist turns out to be. Hopefully we’ll all find something to enjoy in The Last Jedi.

#safereysolo #anti reylo #rey skywalker #rey solo #kylo ren #star wars #the last jedi #speculation #meta #theory

132 notes · View notes

littlenancydrewthings · 7 years

Text

#cluecrewquestionnaire

No one tagged me but I want to do it sooooo

rules: copy and paste, answer the questions, tag 10 people to do the same!

1. What is your favorite Nancy Drew game and why?

ASH 5ever, for reasons I’ve already subjected you to endless gushing about over the years. SHA, because I’m from/in soulmates with the Southwest (the same part of Arizona, actually) and the game captures it perfectly, and is perfect in every other way. MHM, because you can’t beat a quintessential haunted Victorian, and for nostalgia reasons mentioned below.

2. Have you played all 32 games in the series? If not, which ones haven’t you played? If yes, which one did you play first?

All except the original Secrets Can Kill. My first was MHM in 2001. I’d read some of the books, and I’ve always been intensely obsessed with ghosts and mysteries in general, so the title and cover caught my eye at the store. The screenshots in the fold-out cover with their eerie captions captured my imagination. After that it was all I could think about. I talked about it every day for weeks, until eventually I came home from playing and found it sitting on my bed. We couldn’t afford it and I didn’t really expect to get it, so I was beyond excited. Playing in the dark that night was magical. Now I hunt ghosts in Gettysburg with access to an endless supply of haunted houses, but the Golden Gardenia is my favorite.

3. What is your favorite quote from any character in the series?

“It’ll be brief, painful, and full of garbage, but that’s life, isn’t it?” “It’s good to know you’re keeping the mean streets of Pancake City free from crime!” Everything Alexei says.

4. If you could change the ending to any game, which one would it be (no spoilers, though)?

The Silent Spy would have a satisfying ending that did justice to the deep and complex story it had up until then, instead of the rushed, haphazard nonsense we got.

5. Which game is your least favorite, and why?

MED is possibly the absolute worst, for too many reasons to unpack in a paragraph.

6. Which character is your favorite? Why?

do I even need to say it

7. Which character is your least favorite? Why?

Rick Arlen and Tino Balducci. I’ve had to deal with so many of that brand of sleazebag in real life, they make my blood boil. Not in a good way, like how Toni Scallari and Brenda Carlton are entertaining to interact with while being horribly repugnant.

8. How do you feel about the whole Nancy/Ned vs. Nancy/Frank situation? Do you ship her with someone else? Who, and why?

I don’t think Nancy is particularly interested in either of them, or in settling down at all. To be honest, I like the idea of Nancy casually hooking up with hot people she meets on cases, then dashing. I’m especially fond of the idea of her and Zoe having an ongoing rivals-with-benefits thing.

9. Do you have any fun headcanons about any of the games or characters?

Until we met him in person, I used to headcanon that the reason we could never quite catch up with Sonny Joon was because he was on the space station. Jamila blogs about classic sci-fi. My crack headcanon about Alexei being a serial killer is a running joke among my entire household. And in my mind, practically every character is queer.

10. If you could visit any of the game locations, which ones and why?

Japan is my #1 travel goal, so the Ryokan Hiei would be first. I would love to be in Nancy’s shoes when there are no other guests left and she has the whole place to herself. Iceland is my #2 travel goal. I’d own the Golden Gardenia, because it ticks every box on my ultimate fantasy home checklist. I'd spend a couple days at Thornton Hall with my ghost hunting squad. I’d deliberately book a room at Wickford Castle when there was a snowstorm forecast, and do exactly what you do in the game. Shadow Ranch, because out in the middle of the Southwest desert is my place. Alexei’s shop, where we would complain for hours while I bought everything in sight.

11. Did you read any of the original Nancy Drew books? If yes, do you like them? If no, would you consider reading one?

Yeah, I started reading them shortly before I discovered the games. They have that old-fashioned charm, and I enjoy the detailed descriptions of Nancy’s outfits and Hannah’s meals. But they’re also super formulaic and frequently racist. Most of my favorite books are more recent. I particularly love Lights, Camera... and the sequel Action! They’re begging to be adapted for a game.

12. What is one thing any good detective can’t live without?

I’m gonna copy and paste what @nancydrewcomplex said, because it’s on point... “A smartphone for taking notes, allowing friends to find your location when you are inevitably kidnapped or entombed, social media stalking your suspects, some quick research, and most importantly the camera for swiftly taking pictures of evidence and journal pages and things you otherwise can’t risk taking the time to read at that very moment.”

13. Which game had the best soundtrack?

CLK’s use of the 1930s sound is 👌👌👌 FIN's music couldn’t be more perfect for a darkened historic theater. It’s mysterious, magical and haunting, like remnants of the music that played in the theater during its 1910s heyday. I love how CAR has carousel music not just on the ride itself, but worked into the many of the songs. Sometimes it’s creepy, sometimes dreamy, like the ballroom theme, which evokes ghostly ladies and gentlemen waltzing around the haunted house that was once the Galaxy Ballroom. And of course, MHM’s soundtrack is a classic. It captures the feeling that the mansion is an isolated bubble of its own history and secrets, unconcerned with the world passing by outside. I love that each room has its own theme, like characters, from the eerily faded saloon music in the basement to the Chinese room to the dark, forgotten sound of the attic.

14. What is one thing you wish HER would’ve included in any of the games (a conversation, interaction, location, feature, etc)?

More recurring characters. So many of them are way too great to only use once. Also more background on everyone. A big part of the reason I love Alexei so much is that he’s one of the few characters we get extensive background details on.

15. Do you have any ideas for a future game? What is it?

Tons! I’ve posted a couple, with plans for many more.

16. How long does it take you to finish a game from start to finish?

Depending on how many times I’ve played it, anywhere from two to eight hours. Hard to fathom now that my first playthrough of MHM took months. I didn’t yet have the internet to find a walkthrough and would put it aside for awhile when I got really stuck.

17. Did any of the games scare you? If yes, which ones? If no, why?

My first time playing MHM, the “I see you” on the stairs scared me so bad that I never used those stairs again, I took the creaky ones every time. The dog attack in Ghost Dogs scared me to death as a kid. Being outside when the howling started and Red saying “get back in the house” was super effective. It’s hard to scare me anymore, yet I dread going near the burned out ruins in GTH. The bad vibes are so oppressive it’s like static electricity.

18. Why did you join the Nancy Drew fandom here on tumblr?

I didn’t know there was one when I started this blog. I’d seen other “_______ things” blogs and kept thinking of Nancy Drew things. I doubted there were any other serious fans, let alone adults, but figured I’d make the blog anyway if only for my own enjoyment. I was thrilled to hit 20 followers. I was totally blindsided by how fast it took off. I’m continuously grateful and amazed by how good my experience of this fandom has been.

19. What is your favorite Nancy Drew joke (from in-game or even floating around the internet)?

I get a kick out of how SPY is the Ascended Meme game. I did not expect how feelsy they managed to make the horse shirt.

20. Who is someone in the clue crew you’ve always wanted to get to know?

Everyone I used to follow has left :’(

21. What are three unpopular opinions you hold about the games?

Ned is annoying and bland af. I don’t mind Fox and Geese. I’m okay with Nancy getting a new voice actress (not that we’ll ever hear her).

22. Do you have any fun theories about any of the games?

I know the dates don’t line up, but I love the theory about Lizzie Applegate and Diego Valdez being Frances and Dirk under new identities. The prop lady is Nancy as an old lady, which is why the prop room is full of souvenirs from her cases. Aunt Eloise writes about Nancy’s adventures under the pen name Carolyn Keene, hence the box of yellow-spined books in her house.

23. Who was your favorite animal character featured in the games?

Iggy with his tiny outfits >w<

24. Do other people in your life know about your love for Nancy Drew?

To know me is to know about it. It’s too important to keep on the DL. And I’ve gotten all my siblings and even an in-law into it, so no one’s judging.

25. How long have you been playing these games?

Since 2001, when I was nine.

Anyone who wants to do this, consider yourself tagged!

#nancy drew #cluecrewquestionnaire #personal

40 notes · View notes