#i was gna start collecting him

[mywons]

i got orange blood from my local target and GUYS. you will not fucking believe this shit.

I LITERALLY GOT HIM FOR THE POSTCARD TOO LIKE HELLO???? HE WANTS ME TO COLLECT HIM SOOOOO BAD IM LITERALLY A NIKI MAGNET.

#ky speaks #the way i spent $20 on a hoon pc because #i was gna start collecting him #rethinking it now cus like #niki wants me??? #what do u guys think

[leclerced]

why do I feel like Bunny vents her issues with all of the other guys to Seb? Maybe even moreso than Lando and Oscar because Seb can take the 30,000 foot view of not being in his mid-twenties and having some life experience that a lot of them don’t have

she’s telling him about this one being weird or that one wanting to do something she’s not into sexually and he’s reassuring her that as long as she feels safe and cared for, everything is okay

until she slips and tells him about Oscar taking out his jealousy on her - she knows she shouldn’t be spilling the beans about her actual relationship but it just comes right out, maybe alongside a story about Carlos - and Seb gets serious when he tells her that’s something to keep an eye on, not always bad but can be a harbinger of a relationship dynamic she won’t want down the line

(and that really if she just wants to run away with him, that’s always an option)

i love the idea of her confiding in seb sm !!! im gna talk ab them calling it quits w everyone in this bc it just feels realistic to me rn tbh so if u don’t wanna hear that ! don’t read it. also sorry this is such a mess. i just brain vomited all over this.

so. i kinda like the idea of seb and oscar kinda being friends and confiding in each other too. like they could bond over racing, mark, and bunny at first then realize they have a lot in common and seb’s like another mentor to him. eventually oscar opens up to him about how he feels about bunny bc he doesn’t know who else to talk to, but he’s seen how rough seb can get but he always remains so calm and collected so he knows he’s the guy to talk to. maybe he’d get a little rougher with bunny than usual and even though she’d like it, oscar wouldn’t like the way he lost control a little. he’d tell seb how much he hates thinking about her with anyone else, that he doesn’t feel like he can say anything about it because if or when he does, bunny and lando will leave him bc they’re not done messing around and experimenting. tells seb he wouldn’t have even gotten involved if he knew it would end up with him feeling the way he does because it scares him. not the way he loves bunny more than anything, the way he’d do anything for her. maybe thinks ab hitting someone bc they were flirting w her then reels back and is like, she’s flirting back and lando’s watching and laughing i shouldn’t feel this way. he’d retreat into himself again and just feel awful ab it until he finally can tell seb about it. he’d just keep saying he’s scared of losing lando and bunny but seb tells him if he wants to keep them around he needs to tell them bc thats stuff they need to know.

then, sometime after that, seb assumes they’ve talked about it and he’s mostly forgotten about it until they’re together again. she’s not even thinking about what she’s saying bc she trusts him so much. she’d start telling him about how she thinks it’s sweet that oscar’s so protective over her and seb asks what she means. she explains how he acts ab the other guys and how he gets rougher w her and she likes it, bc while’s usually dominant it’s when lance gives her gifts or she sees carlos that he gets jealous and kinda loses control a little. seb feels some genuine concern for her and feels bad for oscar, realizing that it’s getting worse as time goes on and that oscar’s still not talking to them about their feelings. i think in a way, he’d have some feelings for bunny and that’s why he jokes ab running away with her all the time. he’d be very careful with his words bc he doesn’t know everything, just what oscar told him then and what bunny is now, but he knows that if bunny was his girlfriend, he wouldn’t be letting half the grid look at her, much less fuck her.

he wouldn’t tell her what oscar told him bc it’s not his place, but he would tell her to talk to him and kind of play it as “i think we’re very similar and if i was in his place, or even lando’s, this wouldn’t be happening.” and she’d laugh and be like “well that’s because you never liked sharing silly.” and make a reference to his redbull days. but he’d tell her like “i’m serious. i’m gonna be honest and say i don’t understand why he shares you, like you’re not something to be treasured. i’m not kidding when i say if you ever want to run away… and i know even if he’s not saying it, oscar’s thinking it. i think he’d really do anything for you. you need to think about how he feels, because he won’t or can’t tell you. if he’s showing you in bed by being rougher, he’s taking it out on you. there’s nothing wrong with some rough play but it needs to come from a healthy place, not anger that another man is touching you when all of you have consented. its… something you should think about.”

bunny wouldn’t even know what to say, she’s caught up in the fun of it all and her and lando communicate so well she would kinda just assume because oscar’s not saying anything that he doesn’t feel anything. but hearing seb’s words she actually does start thinking about it and is paying more attention to oscar and less attention to the other drivers. they’d assume she’s on her period or something bc she’s not making plans with any of them. but then it lasts longer than a week.

she’s just spending time with oscar and lando while she thinks about it over the next few days and runs through months of memories. she’d analyze how oscar used to act and is acting. she’d realize how much gentler he is with her after a week of it, bc when he’s domming her normally, he’s not gripping her hips hard enough for his fingertips to bruise the skin so the other men know he touched her first. oscar would never realize he was holding her that hard until afterwards when he was kissing the bruises and apologizing while she’s sighing above him saying she likes the physical reminders of his touch. after hearing that, he wouldn’t be able to tell her how much he hates it because she likes it. but once she stops seeing other driver’s he’s not holding her so tight or manhandling her as often even though she loves when he rearranges her however he wants.

and it’s not just in bed. he’s less tense during the day and is laughing and joking w the other drivers more instead of giving them glares. maybe a lot of little things would slowly change over time without anyone realizing it but as soon as she’s not fooling around with them things kinda go back to how they used to? not fully bc drivers are looking at her longingly wondering why she’s not making any plans but no one would ask about it. they stop sending gifts and stuff without having to be told.

she realizes how much of an effect it has on him and would talk to lando alone first ab the talk she had w seb and how the reason she hasn’t made plans is bc she’s worried ab oscar and that it’s not just like normal possessiveness. lando’s kinda surprised she thinks so bc he doesn’t see it but then she tells him everything in detail. he’d ask her what she wants to do, and she tells him she wants to do whatever oscar wants. the focus has been on her, and only her. they haven’t thought about how oscar feels, just assumed because he’s going along with it that he likes it as much as they do.

oscar would be an anxious mess when bunny asks if they can all talk, assuming the worst, but he can’t deny her anything. they’d be sitting on a couch in one of their hotel rooms, and she’d tell him about her talk with seb and how she’s been thinking about how he feels more, he’d be scared the one person he trusted told them but realize he didn’t and it was just bunny being horny over him roughing her up and seb getting worried like the grid dad he is. bunny tells him, “if this is too much we need to know so we can stop. it’s not fun for us if it’s not fun for you. but we can’t read your mind, so if you don’t tell us, we can’t help you.”

he’d tell them how he feels, all of it, and they’d kind of look sad bc they didn’t realize how much he was thinking and hurting, he generally just seems so relaxed and thoughtless they never realized how fast the gears in his head are turning. they’re silent for a moment when he’s done, waiting for more. in the brief silence he’s expecting them to kick him out until she pulls him into a hug and tells him how much she cares about him. he’d take comfort in her arms and hide his face in her stomach because he doesn’t want to hear what she’s about to say, much less look her in the eye while she tells them they can’t stop so they’re breaking up with him. but then she’d tell him she’s sorry for hurting him, that she didn’t realize what they were doing was hurting him. he’d feel bad about not communicating when he realizes they both really do care about him and wouldn’t dump him over it, she doesn’t really care about the other drivers, not the way she cares for him and lando, it was just fun at first kind of got out of hand. they’d have to find a way to break it to everyone because while they don’t actually need a reason not to be having casual sex w them, they don’t want anyone to feel like they did something wrong or crossed a line when they didn’t. idk what they would do tho.

#ask #anon #blindfold universe

[kijosakka]

ooouuuuu izzy i have so many thoughts about izzy within dramaturgy. so many

so im gna keep it a little nebulous here bc again im not entiiirely sure what im keeping/changing within WT, but this is smth fun i want to cover

to rehash another post: noahs behavior, his detachment, comes off to izzy as a kind of strategy. actors recognize actors or something and she does goes on to become one. she can tell hes compartmentalizing. this could also serve as a kind of reason for her to be so eager to swap teams, but again she sees how he flaunts his worst and gets voted off basically unanimously.

^ her intrigue in his lacking and finding out it wasnt in fact a strategy to further himself in the game, could also serve for why she picks him to team-up with in tddddi.

okok, so beginning this at the end to the tddddi special, i established in the post covering it that izzy basically drags noah into the water with her, thus making him apart of the action cast (that is, as an additional competitor and not actually replacing anyone). izzy sees this as an opportunity to learn more about noah, since he has to compete, right?

but come the time theyre on their way to the film lot, noah is nowhere to be seen. and izzy learns though being eliminated that somehow hes apart of the peanut gallery and not the cast.

< i imagine that her hearing about the [*]lawsuit courtney filed would make her think that maaaybe it has something to do with why he wasnt on the show.

and its izzy. shes been intrigued by him from the start and come finale she has every intention of seeking him out after the show if only to satiate her curiosity. only noah is nowhere. nowhere. and nobody knows anything either!

[*learning at the award ceremony/red carpet event that noah was working as chris' PA confirms this to her, for behind-the-scenes-adjacent reasons that im going to get into in this next section]

so noah has his whole disappearing from the public thing post-action, but he isnt the only one who goes on to do something notable after the show: izzy, for one, has an acting career.

and its shown explicitly that izzy is someone with a small-scale example of 'discipline/punishment' in her on-set freakout. she, unaware of the cameras still rolling, blows up in a manner that is made severely public and therefore completely dashes her livelihood and reputation.

this, in tandem with the fact that her even being an actress puts her just behind noah (and s2 geoff and bridgette but ill cover them later) in terms of former contestants getting close to Behind The Cameras, meaning that izzy has had a taste of both contestant-ship and employment (which are wildly different), alters her view on noah drastically.

and after having lost her career, it makes something abundantly clear about why and how noah behaved on camera --- being, this is the kind of thing he's trying to avoid.

and even coming back to the offhand ideas of sierra embodying the casts 'punishments' (as seen in the rb chain really kickstarting this au), theres izzy.

she meets sierra and the obsessive way she rewatches the show and picks it apart, and it confirms to her again why noah separates himself so heavily. and its not like its her speculating; noah is the one cast member that sierra knows nothing about.

^ hes just... so little. he has no audition tapes for her to reverse engineer his name or school from, no bonus clips, nothing useful in his interview, no cast anecdotes. compared to the sheer amount she has on everyone else -- she has a relative guess at his age and height just comparatively to the rest of the cast, but nothing concrete beyond his first name.

not even mentioning how he's completely disappeared socially. nobody in the cast has any contact info, no one knows his whereabouts -- hell, is this guy even alive? does he exist? was he a collective figment of the casts imaginations or something?

^ coming back to izzy; she picks up rumors about the rest of the cast and helps sierra run her mill. but theres something so distinct about the ones pertaining to noah -- unlike the others, based around paparazzi photos and interviews and gossip sites and behaviors from On The Show, his are just... there. they're so inherently baseless they might as well be worthless.

as far as izzy can tell, reality TV as a machine has chewed everyone up and spit them out to try and break themselves catering to the whims of the Public, and the only one whos going unseen is noah.

im sure this means something important and focal to their dynamic as teammates in WT, but i havent worked out everything for that season so i cant say definitively what it would impact.

you could spin it so izzy and noahs dynamic (and to some extent with both being Pieces in the Business giving them vague history/shared experience) is much more focal to the overarching story and his character growth as a whole and keep her in the game longer, or just have her influence his motivations to a much greater degree.

idk!! not entirely sure on that front, but izzy having that small-scale example of what 'being unaware' can do is pretty interesting in the context of this au!!

#idk i saw celeb manhunt and in the context of this au thought it was extremely fitting #plus izzy has ties to sierra and sierra has ties to the Themes #total drama #character analysis #dramaturgyAU #td noah #td izzy #< terror. #imsick and probably forgetting smth ummm

[ineffabildaddy]

6, 8, and 21 for the soft asks <3

omg hiii hehehe

6. say three nice things about yourself (three physical and three non-physical)

oh god okay, physical: my tattoos are sick, my beard's coming along nicely, and ermmm i'm stacked in the back lmfao

non-physical: i try to be a friendly person, i'm very organised and clean at work which i'm proud of, anddd i'd like to think i know a good amount about music

8. tag someone (or multiple people) who make you feel good

this bit's gna be long so i'll put it under the cut dlfjlkdg

@raining-stars-somewhere-else he's an inactive king atm but he's my bestie and i love him<3 so so hilarious and observant and talented and kind. he's my dude and he means a lot to me go away

@sad-chaos-goblin i feel like i can be totally insane around you and you'll get on my wavelength immediately, it's amazing dlkkkljgfjkld. also i feel really lucky to be friends with someone so well-rounded and driven and fun, not to mention compassionate<3 i'm really really lucky to have met you and i hope we get to do irl adventures in the nearish future!!! until then we're great friends from afar!!!

@omens-for-ophelia we're just perfectly matched for our headcanons and kinks and shit and i absolutely love it. u get me, i get u, we get each other on this front and on many others!!! ur an extremely nurturing person too. i also love having u around bc ur full of fun facts and passion and energy, and of course ur art is absolutely incredible, i'm scratching at the walls just thinking about it dklkjldfgjkl. can't wait to create more absolutely feral works of crowley and aziraphale [redacted] in various ways hahahhkshjdf. and also hopefully have some london hangouts soon<3

@queer-reader-07 of course i've gotta mention ya because you're one of my fave blogs! i feel so warm and welcome reading all your posts and tags because you're a very lovely individual, and you've also got so many valuable things to say and i really look forward to seeing your takes on everything<3 also as i said before ur a very funny person and i enjoy that heh. i always get so excited when u pop up in my notifs i'm like little old me????

@foolishlovers bestie your writing makes me so happy but chatting and things makes me even happier<3 you're a really enthusiastic friend to have and you've got so many wonderful qualities that i just wanna share the love as much as possible hehe. i'm very glad we're doing shhh it's a secret together and that we've become close in general uwu

@crowleyslvt ur a little lad who's always got something hilarious and insightful to say about literally anything i come to u with, whether it's fkn silly memes or an existential crisis lol. you have such a unique way of looking at the world and i really enjoy it. also having a giggle with u is always top tier and on top of that ur a very supportive king<3 and of course u writing's delish at all times in any context

@voluptatiscausa i can literally tell you my most redacted thoughts and you'll be like yeah this is just another day at the office dkffjddgl. you're a silly and goofy guy (gn) who's simultaneously very easy to open up to which is always a comfort<3 the fact that we both like mitchell and webb makes us collectively Not Like Other Girls and we need to capitalise on that more tbh. also i greatly enjoy ur writing ofc

@bowtiepastabitch you're jokes. also we're very different and yet somehow the same brand of fucked up which i love<3 the lore could not be more disparate but the vibes could not be more immaculate. pls continue to be my friend smh

some more legends i love @crowleyholmes @fearandhatred @crowleys-bentley-and-plants @celestialcrowley @sabotage-on-mercury @quoththemaiden @ineffable-rohese @crawley-fell

21. if you could tell your past self one thing, what would it be?

probably this - one day you're going to start sticking up for yourself, i promise<3

#not good omens #asks #ineffabildaddy

[mogglewrites]

Say What?

LukeJamie confession fic (Luke Ver.)

[Also posted on AO3 and my Twitter as a thread fic]

This fic has two different outcomes. This is if Luke wins the fight.

Thank you to my friend @miss-evening for being my beta-reader. You're a lifesaver.

Okay, let's get to the fic.

----------

It's after hours at the Buckler training center. Two men are fighting, each throwing punches and kicks as if their lives depend on it.

All over a simple wager.

"The loser has to do whatever the winner wants."

It's childish, really, but too tempting to pass up.

It's a chance.

Luke gets a sturdy hold on Jamie's shirt, and rushes forward, pushing and pinning him to the floor. The drunken boxer struggles against him, but the combined weight of Luke's grip and fatigue from a long fight drains the energy out of him. Eventually, he stops. He can't win this now. Only the sound of them panting remains. Jamie is ruined under him, face red and hair loose from its braid. He didn't drink at all throughout the match, which was strange. Usually when they brawl, there would be at least one or two sips from his gourd.

"Ugh, you're too fuckin' big, man. Are your arms packed with bricks or something? Shit...," the yellow clad fighter grumbles. Luke releases him and stands up. He offers him a hand, and unsurprisingly, Jamie refuses it, getting up on his own. He sweeps back his long, black hair and looks for where his hair band has gone off to, then goes over to pick it up.

"Don't be a sore loser. Are you gonna back out of the deal too?" Luke crosses his arms, waiting for his rival to collect himself. Jamie rolls his eyes.

"The great Jamie Siu doesn't go back on his words. I'm the one who suggested it anyway," he says as he ties his hair back in a loose ponytail. He's too tired for a braid right now. "So what do you want? Food?"

Jamie turns to face him, but Luke doesn't meet his gaze. He seems to be deep in thought, though he's staring at his opponent.

Does he have a giant bruise on his face or something? Why is he staring?

"Hello? Did I hit ya on the head too hard? Pick something already." He's getting impatient. First his plan got ruined, and now he's being tortured by his opponent's indecisiveness. It's pretty odd, since Luke is always so straightforward. He must be thinking real hard on how he could humiliate him.

"I want you...to repeat what I say," Luke finally answers after another minute of contemplation. Jamie raises an eyebrow at him.

"That's it?" He puts a hand on his hip. Honestly, he's a little disappointed. A chance to make him do whatever he wants and the guy chooses to play Simon Says. But that's fine. He'll let it pass, just this once.

"Whenever you're ready, big guy."

Luke takes a deep breath to bolster himself. He keeps eye contact with Jamie as he begins.

"I."

"I," Jamie says after him. Weird start. Maybe he's making him say a humiliating line or something.

"...love." Luke steps closer. There's a faint dusting of pink on his cheeks.

"L-love?" Jamie stutters, face turning red as well. He's taken aback by Luke approaching him. No way. No fucking way.

Luke stops. They're standing chest-to-chest now. Jamie is looking up at him with wide eyes.

"..."

The training center is silent. Luke can feel the heat radiating from Jamie's tan skin. Jamie's top is open, showing off the expanse of his smooth chest. Luke sometimes wonders how he doesn't have any scars, even though he seems to get into as many fights as he does.

"You," he finishes, nearly whispering. Both of them are flushed all the way down to their necks. Blue eyes look pleadingly to his object of affection. He's done it. He has confessed.

Now he can only hope that Jamie will accept it.

Fuck, why the hell did he think this was a good idea? Maybe he can laugh it off and say it's a prank. Jamie would understand, right?

"You."

Luke's eyes fall shut. Hearing Jamie say those three words makes him so happy, but knowing that they're probably not true just turns the happiness into a heavy weight that gnaws at him from inside.

He senses Jamie grabbing him by the collar and yanking him down.

Luke braces for impact.

And feels Jamie's lips press against his own.

His eyes fly open in surprise, but closes again as he melts into it. Luke pulls Jamie in, one hand finding his lower back and the other coming up to cradle his face. It began sweet, but a swipe of Jamie's tongue on his lips startles him into breaking the kiss.

"You better not be messing with me, Sullivan, or it's gonna be my fist meeting your face," Jamie growls, sharp eyes burning with passion. Luke feels like his heart can blast off straight into space. He couldn't stop the smile from blooming even if he tried.

"Nah. You of all people should know I don't lie." He gives Jamie a peck on the cheek. He's full on hugging him now, and Jamie is hugging him back! He kisses him again, and again, and again-

"Ookay, that's enough. Leave some for later too, dumbass." Jamie's palm blocks his advances. He looks away from Luke, but his cheeks are flaming red.

"Aww, is the great Jamie Siu defeated by a couple kisses?" Luke coos. Guess he got a little too eager there.

"No, 'cus if you don't stop, I might just fuck you right here." Jamie grins, glancing back at him. Luke sputters in indignation.

"Jamie!" His hold loosens just enough for his rival (or lover? Are they lovers now?) to wriggle out.

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding," he laughs, "I rather do it on a bed." He starts walking towards the door. Where does this guy think he's going?!

"Why you-" Luke catches up to Jamie and scoops him up from behind, holding him in a princess carry, earning a squawk of surprise and a hit on the chest.

"Just for that, I'm taking you back to my place. Better be prepared to get stuck in bed all day tomorrow," he huffs. Call him brash or whatever, but if Jamie wants to tease him like this, he'll do it right back. He's not afraid!

"Cocky much? Don't disappoint me." Jamie drags the tip of his index finger under Luke's chin, like he's caressing an animal. Luke shivers and his smile widens.

"You can bet on it."

#mog writes #lukejamie #street fighter 6 #sf6 #sf6 luke #sf6 jamie #luke sullivan #jamie siu

[attourney-at-lycan]

Dante/zane

OH I KNOW THIS

someone fucking- sent me videos of them interacting in llp and i thought it was so good

definitely a "someone's gna die." "OF FUN!" dynamic

i feel like they'd start hanging out in mystreet simply bc dante comes over to hang out w/ garroth and laurance. but while laurance and garroth are out fucking... kissing or wtver, zane's forced to interact w/ him

I CAN IMAGINE: dante discover's zane's collection and makes fun of it off handedly- kinda like "lmao that's kinda dumb" bc he toys like that a lot w/ the other, but it actually kinda hurts zane's feelings bc it's something very special to zane. he feels like shit about it afterwards so he makes it his mission to watch all of my little horsie's seasons, does research on actualy horses and then goes to zane like "i understand now." zane has gained himself a fellow brony

zane discovering he can enjoy affection and dante learning to control himself when being affectionate.

dante getting zane to prank call their friends bc they sound practically the same (hahaha get it bc same va)

them being each other's concsiousness.

exhibit a: "i swear to god i'm going to fucking k-" "zane that's an eleven year old kid!!!!" "..."

exhibit b: "i think i'm gna climb up to the roof to get it" "don't." "..fine......."

#very fun i love them #aphmau #zane ro'meave #aphmau dante

[ranhaitanisgf]

you’re literally welcome in my inbox anytime girl 😭😭

most of the people on my blog are genshin fans bc that’s how i started out (yes i’m a disgusting genshin fan judge me all you want, it’s warranted) SO I HAVE NOBODY TO GEEK OUT ABOUT IT WITH 😭😭.

also i will CRY if kokos white hair isn’t done justice he looks SO GOOD !! personally i am a huge fan of his other timeline hairs too tho, yk the black with the silver 😍😍 UGH he’s so pretty <33 (can you tell he’s one of my faves.)

nobody was done better justice in the anime then my main man izana though, that man is absolutely MAGICAL in the anime 😍😍

LOOK AT MY BOYYYY

HES BEAUTIFULLLL

sorry he’s my fave 😔😔 (sorry shinichiro you gotta get to the back of the line boo )

anyways please gush all you want to me, i’ve read the manga a bazillion times and i’ve even read part of the spin off ( chapter 28 and i think that’s the most recent? the site i’m using only goes to 28 )

SO SPLURGE ALL YOU WANT LMAO

its funny u bring up genshin .... my second book of oneshots ever (on wattpad i havent logged into that in yearsss) WAS ABT GENSHIN 😭 i lowkey fell off it but i keep up w everything so dw im also a disgusting genshin fan LMAAOAOA (i spent $400 on cyno im literally a psycho.)

YOU ARE SOOOOO RIGHT idk i think the studio fsss wants izana cause they had no business making him soooo magestic and gorgeous and mystical like wtf . &&&& they added those little moments w him and kakucho like izana is DEFINITELY their favorite !! ik they were crying and weeping when animating the scene (it also made me cry and weep like a baby)

& OMGGG THE SPIN OFFFFF !!!! its literally my favorite fjhkdjfhgkjh literally nobody ever talks abt it but its actually so good like AHHHH !!! i love to see the friendship between baji and chifuyu its sooo cute & its so cool to see the past events of first division!! + ryusei .... why do we collectively as a fandom never talk abt ryusei HES SOOO INTERESTING and nuanced and also fine asf .. im fs gna write a little smth smth for him soon bc HE NEEDS MORE ATTENTION. + theres just so many funny moments which is so nice bc i feel like bajis time in the manga was so short and then tragic, so its so nice to see his little silly moments too !! (i love baji sm so this is the best spin off EVERRR) i was dead asf when he dressed in a sailor uniform to get extra tutoring LAWLL

#i never stop talking LMAOAOAO #born to yap forced to chat #idk what that even means #˗ˏˋ𖤐 hana’s moots <3ˎˊ˗

[maiverie]

TRIAGE!┊ a lee heeseung series — MASTERLIST ♡

you try to teach the nerd how to date.

SYNOPSIS! heeseung is not, by any measure, date-able. he’s dorky, he’s nerdy, and he does this weird thing where he snorts loudly every time he laughs. in fact, he loves everything that normal people are allergic to — computer science, collecting rare comic books, and birdwatching on the weekend.

given that you two have obviously nothing in common, you find yourself utterly flabbergasted when you receive a letter in your locker, on which heeseung has written, "hi. will you please teach me how to date?"

FEATURING! lee heeseung x fem!reader

GENRES! romance, comedy, fluff, high school | written series

TL;DR! nerd!heeseung, popular girl!reader, (kind of) fake dating, “nope. no. there is no fucking way i could ever be attracted to a boy that plays sudoku in star wars pajamas” au, opposites attract (!!!), light mutual pining angst, basically a cinderella story in which you transform heeseung into a hot boy and start panicking bc you’re not supposed to be attracted to him but u are —or— you're the popular girl with a thousand insecurities and heeseung can see right through u

WARNINGS! swearing, mentions of drug use, lowercase intended, (verbal) bullying / gossiping, some suggestive scenes :>

kayla’s playlist (@miiiwaa) ♡ my shitty og playlist . tags : #.*triage .

NOTE! this fic is solely inspired by hee's pics from the 2022 seasons greetings. screaming crying HEE IN GLASSES HAS ME IN CHAINS. anyway omg i hope u give this fic a chance! this is gna be wild ASDFKLJ i’m so excited for this :DD

MASTERLIST

❝ lesson I: stop apologising. ❝ lesson II: burn your bowties. ❝ lesson III: be first in something. ❝ lesson IV: unbeknownst to you. ❝ lesson V: falling

please support me via liking, reblogging & interacting! ♡ thank u sm for reading, hope u enjoy this one :> my other works can be found here. edit: thank u sm for all the love on the masterlist 🥺

TAGLIST

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#BIRDWATCHING??? I THINK YES #enhypennetwork #heeseung au #heeseung x reader #lee heeseung fic #heeseung imagines #enhypen scenarios #enhypen fluff #heeseung scenarios #heeseung fluff #enhypen x reader #enhypen imagines #enhypen drabbles #lee heeseung imagine #heeseung drabbles #enhypen heeseung x reader #enhypen fic #enhypen fanfic #heeseung fic #heeseung fanfic #lee heeseung #heeseung #lee heeseung au #heeseung fanfiction #heeseung enhypen #lee heeseung edit #enhypen headcanons #heeseung headcanons #.*triage

[kooksrae]

a collection of things that have made me feel a certain way

updated 23042024

not everything recommended here will suit everyone (smut/ violence/ toxic relationships) and if you do click into links please make sure you read the tws before continuing. 

Social Media AU! (text messages/ snapchat/ twitter/ insta typa vibes)

casual - @muniimyg (JJK × reader)

i have been religiously following this on one of my other tumblr accounts and it's finally completed and i'm so excited to share this with all of you!!

reading this made my insides very tingly and BUTTERFLY typa energy!

lowkey my new comfort fic!

there's some written parts here and there but it really just adds to the CONTENT and the SPICE of the whole situation

 Tiger Flower  - @v-hope (JJK × reader/ KTH × reader)

hella fluffy. makes my heart do the uwu. very much wholesome. something i stayed up till 6am reading

11/10 would stay up till 6 reading it again.

also the significance of tiger lilies is insanely aDORABLEEE 

my love for jjk has just grown a gazillion times more

Under A Shadow - @firebettercallnct (KTH × reader, slight JJK × reader)

a lil angst and a lil fluff. (as all good stories will have)

kinda wish it was longer idk. im a sucker for super long stories.

ALSO !! we get some side yoonmin action !!!!!!!!!!!

Stole your shirt - @firebettercallnct (JJK × reader)

one of my personal favs. super cute and also everyone’s on some kinda crack or sum shit idk.

p damn fluffy and when you reach the end you’ll j kind of wish you could go back to before u read it because u wna experience all the feelings agn.

ALSO!!!! we hv some namjin and yoonseok action !!!1!!

Rumour Has It - @bangtann-bangdamn (KTH × reader)

very much wholesome.

genuinely found it quite funny and it had me laughing at 2 in the morning

i dont rly hv much to say just pls go read it. 

everyone should read it once in their lives

Belong - @v-hope (KTH × reader)

THIS IS FINALLY COMPLETED!!

something i chanced upon during my late night fanfic times and like let me tell you. a whole fucking new world. 

this was really a beautiful read. 11/10 obsessed with this. i literally spend my time rereading this.

teehee give this a read. all yall artist!taehyung fans are rly not gna regret it

Daylight - @maravillamin (MYG × reader)

will make you decide to legally change your name to y/n

ever wanted to be a single mom because you got a divorce with your useless husband? no? well now you wish you were.

literally dad!yoongi and mom!reader

also you have the cutest friends? like this is so cute. makes me want to birth children

touch of him - @herherteartear (JHS × reader) 

you are living the perfect girl life kinda thing and hoseok's the opposite of it all

this is serving polar opposites but not really kind of energy. 

also this is giving off "business only" family energy if you know what i mean.

Actual written things !!

 Monster - @btssmutgalore (JJK × reader)

currently deactivated so i've linked the fic from dee's ao3

this started so many years back and just a few days ago it finally became a completed fic!!!

i have an extremely soft spot for this jungkook.

personal favourite is chapter 18. like literally my heart expands a gazillion times just thinking about this

ngl i was here more for the plot than for the smut. truly chef's kiss

charred - @neonlights92 (JHS × reader)

this was genuinely quite intense. i dont really know what i was expecting out of this tbh. 

development of story plot was great! I enjoyed seeing how it unfolded bit by bit.

this was part of a collection of fics written about mafia!bts n this is my literal fav. i feel like it wasnt too cliche?? (take note of how i said i feel, bcs at this pt i dont even know what counts as cliche anymore) but hey to me this was good n refreshing n i liked it n now i want to share this with all of u

Beloved - @bang-tan-bitches (MYG × reader)

major yandere energy. lowkey disturbing but some part of me is just madly obsessed with this. 

also when you picture daechwita!yoongi it really just drives you craycray

i really dont know what else to say?! but do give this a read (only if you're comfortable)

this is definitely not going to be something that everyone is okay with reading so please check the warnings before proceeding!

love of my life - @latetaektalk  (MYG × reader)

okay this shit be painful af. this fucking broke me. idk have never been the same since. would still read it all over again.

this was about 7k words? so not the longest but it was long enough for something so sad :( 

in general really sad and emo. if you want to feel like the whole world is crashing on you pls give it a read.

the art of the rom-com - @gukyi (JJK × reader)

first of all wtf. made me feel single af. 

it’s our fav kind of enemies to lovers energy. slowburn. college au. yeah you get the gist. 

super fluffy but we love to see it. also mildly angsty but it’s all g we will get over it.

okay but also this was so longggg!!! what an experience. a solid 33k words. i nv thought i would reach the end of it but i did.

super solid read. i hope yall read it too.

blossom - @namfinessed (KTH × reader)

okay first off, yall alrdy know i love hella long fics. this was 38k+ words.

please only read this when you have the time istg i was staring on my tiny screen and really wanted to just fall asleep but also it was too intriguing to just sleep on.

yall rly be sleeping on this though. a very solid read.

i mean you really can’t go wrong with florist!taehyung energy amirite

bad influence: collection - @noteguk (JJK × reader)

so this is an ongoing one as well. 

truth is i havent finished reading whatever has been posted yet. BUT i do have a very good reason for it, which is that i’m not ready to be in a position where i realise i’m going to be done reading it.

frm wtv i’ve read this is some sexy ass story. 

honestly you could read it as individual parts i guess? but for the real feels pls read all the way from the first part. 

oh and it’s a hella hot badboy!jungkook so yes if you r into that you def should add this to your must read list.

easy - @itsamejin (JJK × reader)

okay so here’s the deal with this. collegeau! fuckboy energy. bets are made. yea you kinda get it.

It’s a very basic boy takes bet and ends up falling for the girl kinda thing but idk i really enjoyed the process of reading it. 

you get the good fluff and angst balance in this too so :>

Thoughts Of You Keep Me Awake At Night - @hollyhomburg (MYG × reader)

yoongi asking for cuddles i-

reason stated above should be reason enough for you to go read this

it’s a short 2.1K word situation here so you don’t have to spend a whole hour on it heheh

very nice experience if you’re reading this while it’s late at night and you are alone in bed and can’t seem to fall asleep.

Get You The Moon - @bymoonchild (KTH × reader)

enemies to lovers. do i really have to elaborate on this?

you get to see soft!taehyung and also like jock!taehyung all in one !!

i felt shy reading this. was super absorbed.

ooh and it’s smutty too! 

it’s relatively long (we’re talking 19.6k words besties) but wow the build up, the plot the everything is peak!!!

Paper Cranes - @aquaminwrites (KTH × reader)

we are talking best friends to lovers. some next level fluff. kim taehyung is completely to die for here. i kid you not.

made me wish someone would like me this much lol.

i felt the butterflies reading this. got some post reading depression after this,,,

18.3k words about how you n kth are like the best in the world?? so like go read?!!

anti-baby fever - @gashinabts (JJK × reader)

pls this was so funny and for WHAT!?

it genuinely made me laugh out loud at 2.32 in the morning. 

okay but it’s smutty so you gotta be able to like the spice to read this

it’s also short (4.5k)!! which is a blessing if you are planning to read smth real quick before going to bed!!

but i found myself relating to this though bcs i do not want to have babies unless it’s w bts :’) 

SIN CITY - @btssmutgalore (PJM × reader)

currently deactivated so i've linked the fic from dee's ao3

okAY YALL so this is the one thing that lives in my head rent free. istg there was a period a while back when i went on a social media cleanse or smth but i just had to go back onto tumblr to get updates on this

genuinely the one thing that keeps me going

it’s completed so u can experience all the emotions in one sitting if you are up for that. 

has my whole heart.

dear @btssmutgalore i love you for writing this. pls marry me.

and yes it is spicy my dears. very spicy.

you do get a decent amt of fluff n angst ish n smut so yes it covers all bases.

and you get sum dancing jimin :>

you won’t be able to control yourself istg pls go and read. 

Waking Up Next To The Sun - @houseofwhalien (JHS × reader)

this do be wholesome hours w bby jung hoseok

wholesome morning becomes spicy morning and then back to wholesome morning

okay and this is truly the duality of jung hoseok. like i can literally picture the man being exactly like this

is a short 1.8k of sunshine to bless yall !

Interrupted - @kimnjss (JHS × reader)

let me get yall with this. this is actual spice spice. we are talking extra chilli pepper flakes. 

i’m not usually one for something that is just full on spice but like i was feeling sum typa way when i read this. 

it’s idol!jhope in here who also turns out is your boyfriend. istg y/n do be the luckiest uGH.

it isn’t too long (4.3K words) so it works as a quick read to convince your brain to have some sexy hoseok dreams.

there was a bug - @kimnjss (KNJ × reader)

i felt frustrated reading this man. like the push and pull - istg my girl y/n and kimnamjoon really needa get their shit tgt. 

this was so dirty and for WHAT!! making me shy in bed when i’m all alone with my phone hngghh

has quite a bit of angst and fluff but it’s worth it. the 7k words are all worth it.

baby, my baby - @pjimims (JJK × reader)

okay this was something i read years ago but as i was scrolling through the things i liked i found it again! 

thought it was quite cute

i mean come on dad!jungkook is to die for

am kinda sad they aren't writing anymore fics tho :"(

Angel in the Darkness - @icyhobi (JJK × reader)

okay this made me go oop

i remember seeing like part 3 and i was like okay gna wait for it to be a completed fic before i start reading. and i finally got around to reading it yesterday.

mafia!jungkook is kinda my thing now i guess idk

also wth they all be so sneaky sneaky about everything

will make u go omg out loud

anyway i think i am going to hv I trust issues now (finish reading it and you'll know what i mean by this)

Meet The Parents - @btssaysstudy (KNJ × reader)

idk what it was about this that made me feel very warm but i liked it a lot

it's super short and wholesome

and idk it's nice to think that our dear kim namjoon would be like this 

cute read for when you're busy and need a short burst of fluff to get you through the day

Serving Bitterness - @guksthighs (KSJ × reader)

let me start off by saying this is like the first seokjin fic im recommending omg

this is a super short one (1.8k words) so it's something that you can probably squeeze in during the busy mornings. 

let me first start off by saying y/n is really not here to play lol

also you do gonna be experiencing some second hand embarrassment at the end of it though oof

but yes pls read it was kinda cute, kinda wish it was longer though 

do you want me (dead?) - @gukyi (JJK × reader)

this is a hogwarts au story!!!

dont you just love ravenclaw seeker mr jjk bcs im obsessed!!!!

v cute fic honestly

10/10 wld recommend

pls give it a read hehe

Exitus Acta Probat - @bang-tan-bitches (MYG × reader)

guys,,,, mafia!yoongi pls i am on my knees.

funnily enough i discovered this ages ago during one of my late night tumblr reads but then i lost it the next morning. was able to find it again a few days (?) ago!!

i really liked how yoongi pulled sneaky moves and basically lulled y/n into believing whatever he wanted her to believe to get what he wants

it's lowkey giving yandere(?) and something about yoongi in yandere-ish vibes really keeps me going on a daily basis

tbh my mind sometimes goes back to them and makes me wonder where they are now!!

(pls,,, if you ever want to write more for them,,, i am so ready for it!!)

The one that got away (literally no longer exist; but just going to keep it here)

the snow king - @bloomsuga (KTH × reader)

you got fanatsy stuff going on. you got hella angsty and fluffy all at the same time. besties i think we found the best ice prince! kim taehyung out there.

also we have some slight cutie jimin moments. ( a definite plus!)

oh yea and it gets smutty but in like the most beautiful way.

also this was a long read of 25k words. but it’s a an absolute beautiful creation. did not know that we could put 25k words altogether to make such a masterpiece.

lowkey wanted to cry bcs its way too good.

Willow - @breakiebunny (JJK × reader)

i am not going to ever recover from this.

the number of times i find my brain just drifting over to this work of art is not okay.

my whole heart is still out here hoping desperately that in some alternate universe where this is true that everything is nice and works out great

i felt kinda empty after finishing this ngl,,,

and this is a one-shot,,,

will always hold a piece of my heart

stood up - @parkdatjimin (MYG × reader)

okay everybody. pls. just read this pls.

like this was bloody long. fricking 26.7k words. but what a great use of 26.7k words.

it's like shakespeare rose from the dead and was like what if i dropped another hit!!! (okay not a hit,,, idk it's 2 in the morning i cant think)

for someone who has never even been in a relationship in her whole life i really FELT THIS like in my heart, in my soul typebeat

also working some meh food n beverage job is literally my life. laugh out loud. going to daydream about this when i'm at work tomorrow.

bitter sweet - @mikrksmos (JJK × reader)

once again ladies and gents, my fav typa thing; bf2l

my heart. so full of love. for bestfriend!jk

also wtheck jungkook with a lil sibling? heck yea sign me tf up!!

i think i was very much overwhelmed with the emotions that our dear jk felt bcs sometimes life do be like that

plot was p dang noice!!

#kooksrae recommends! #kooksrae is reading! #bts fic rec #fluff #angst #smut #slowburn #bts #bts fluff #bts angst #bts smut #bts au #jungkook #jimin #taehyung #namjoon #hoseok #yoongi #seokjin #college!au #badboy!au #best friends to lovers #enemies to lovers #mafia!au

[bedtimebrain]

EXO D.O.: You & Me. (P9)

Genre/Desc: Loosely adapted from A Love So Beautiful

Char: u x soo

Series Page

‘Honestly that game was planned for girls to have an advantage so you don’t end up doing this, but i guess you’re just bad at games’ the class rep, joohyuk laughed at you

You continued whining and sulking while tugging the logistics bag. All these misfortune…

As if the fact that minji sunbae was your group leader wasn’t enough. And also the fact that kyungsoo literally gave the lunch you made for him to Minji sunbae. And how they just stuck to each other like glue the whole day. All the scenes played over and over again in your head.

‘Y/N ah, ive been really curious for quite some time now, can i ask? It might sound abit intrusive since we aren’t that close’ 

‘Oh, you have a question for me? Sure! That’s surprising.’ 

‘Is there something between you and woohyun? Or is it between Kyungsoo and you?’

‘What do you mean?? We are all just friends!’ Perplexed by his question

‘I clearly saw you and woohyun holding hands just now! Like near the lake!’

‘Oh please!! That’s just because there were a lot of potholes, he was just helping me so I dont fall in’

‘Oh, really…Then what about you and kyungsoo? He always has his eyes on you you know. At first I thought you were into him too, but nowadays you and woohyun seem pretty tight’

Always has… his eyes on me?

You felt your heart skip a beat. But for once you told yourself not to get your hopes up. Not knowing how to take that information, you kept silent for a while.

Breaking the silence joohyuk suddenly added

‘You know how earlier when we were supposed pair up, I saw him looking at you even before Minji Sunbae asked him to partner. But you agreed to woohyun so fast haha.

And also it wasn’t by chance you got coke alright, kyungsoo actually went to another group that had coke to swap out the Fanta grape for you. I was with him to collect the drinks, they made him dance for it, and he still did it.

It’s hard to believe he doesn’t have a thing for you’

You stopped in your tracks as you heard those unbelievable words ring through your ears.

‘I... I really doubt it.’

After some hesitation, you told joohyuk

‘I keep telling him i like him and keep doing so many things for him but he is just so neutral about everything. i cant even tell what he’s actually feeling on the inside.’ 

Chuckling, joohyuk patted you on your shoulders, 

“Anyway, play along with me later, ill propose we play a game before the confidence walk tonight.’

‘Huh, what, why?’ He winked at you and doubled up his pace, and you chased after him to spill the beans. -------------------

‘Okay, everyone pair up for the confidence walk and tell me your pairs so i can keep track’ Minji sunbae instructed the group and the chatters started again as everyone sat around the bon fire. 

‘Sunbae, why dont we play a game to decide our partners instead? For the whole day most of us have just stuck to our own friends.’ Sungjong asked with a tinge of aegyo and that was enough for everyone to agree, including Minji Sunbae.

‘Let’s do this! We’ll see who can hit the lowest note among us with Do-Re-Mi you’re out if you go out of tune or can’t hit the note. The winners take turns choosing partners!’

WHAT ?!

when you bugged Joohyuk to tell you what he’s about to do tonight, he said he would make sure you and kyungsoo partner tonight!

HOWS THIS GOING TO HELP ME WIN THE GAME?!

There wasn’t even time for you to ask him what’s going on, and the game already started. And as fast as it started, as fast you went out of the game.

Joohyuk that liar, I’m not gna get to pair w kyungsoo…

Giving up hopes on pairing w him now, you watched as the game went on and kyungsoo was actually doing pretty well !

And it wasn’t long before just joohyuk and kyungsoo were left. And, kyungsoo actually won!!

‘Kyungsoo you’re truly a singer’ joohyuk clasp at his throat, fake coughing while giving his praise. And of course Minji Sunbae had to give her smile of approval which you scrunched your face at.

‘Anyway, since Kyungsoo won, you get to choose your partner first’ Minji noona started joyfully and you saw her nudging Kyungsoo a couple times, hinting to be chosen

You saw them exchanging eye contact with each other. Simply can’t bear to watch this, you just decided to look away and play w the fallen twigs instead. Then out of the blue, 

‘I.. I choose Y/N’

————— Is there anyone interested in a D.O. perspective? If there are any reblogs ill write a part from his! Otherwise ill save the effort :D

#exowritersnet #exo kyungsoo #exo fluff #kyungsoo fluff #do kyungsoo #exo #exo fanfics exo scenarios

[tabdrix]

hello !! i’m hero, i’m 22, est tz, she/her pronouns, i like horror films and my cat and yr gonna have to forgive me for this mess that is tabitha !! i’ll have a full bio soon but rn we’re just gna get a quick lil rundown

if you wanna plot, like this, i can hit u up on here or on discord!! 

𝙏𝘼𝘽𝙄𝙏𝙃𝘼 𝙃𝙀𝙉𝘿𝙍𝙄𝙓

24 years old from denver, colorado and has been in roswell four years. currently working as a radio host and dj at rocket radio !

triggers: post partum depression, death, drugs

tabitha hendrix was born to teen parents in denver, colorado. apple of her father’s eye from the start, her mother was a bit more distant, not quite used to having a new addition to the family 

they were on their own for the first few years of her life, tabitha often babysat by her maternal grandmother while her parents went to school, work, etc. 

her parents didn’t stay together past the age of four for her, they split amicably, her dad, while still her hero, took a job out of state to provide for her-- so she saw him less and less 

her mom was never quite... okay with her, tabitha often reached for her mother’s love only to be met with disdain, or just pure ignorance. she’d instead find most of her maternal needs met by her grandma. 

her grandma was a spitfire, and it was very clear that tabitha took after her, her grandma is the one that taught her to be goofy, to not take things so seriously, to live her life to the fullest, and live her life she did. 

while she was never the smartest student, she was a class clown, always out to make people laugh-- she fell into the ‘cool crowd,’ and often was the life of the various parties they thrown, often the one coming up with stupid schemes like climbing up on the water tower or prank calling the school principal 

she falls for this guy, and get this, the cycle repeats. because soon enough there’s a little tiny pink plus sign staring back at her from a pregnancy test-- that’s definitely hard. keeping the kid is something she struggles with but ultimately, she grows attached. the guy says he’ll stay. she believes him. 

eventually, at 17, two months after her birthday, she gives birth to a baby girl. she names her lucy after her grandma. she falls in love with the little thing, she thinks she’s got her eyes. her and lucy’s father don’t stay together very long. 

her grandma watches lucy 2, or tooey (yes, it’s vaguely off of little shop of horrors), while tabitha finishes school. she starts her college career in media production, commuting from where she is.

unfortunately, during her second year, her grandma passes away, years of smoking finally catching up to her. her mom won’t watch tooey, and she’s at an impasse. 

however! remember her dad? yeah, he was working in a little town in roswell, new mexico, with his new wife and kids. they kept in contact after all those years, and he mentioned there’s a position open at their radio station. tabitha applies, gets in, and soon her and lucy are hightailing it the hell away from her mom and to a small trailer in tripp’s trailer park. she has a little money saved, but this job ends up being a godsend. 

quickly she becomes ingratiated with the culture of roswell, and the aliens (or rumors thereof) that surround the town, and rises through the ranks at the radio station, eventually becoming one of the main hosts and djs. 

eventually! she’s able to make enough to move her and lucy into the aurora apartments, this is only a recent development. 

lucy’s seven now, and as much of a little shit as her mom is-- tabitha’s main priority is her above everything else, and keeping her safe in this wild world. 

TL;DR tabitha is the kid of two teen parents, a bit of a wild child goofball who eventually became a teen parent herself at 17. her daughter, lucy, is 7, and she works at the radio station as one of their main hosts, so you’ve probably heard her on the radio!

other

hates any name besides tabitha unless you’re like close to her, that means noooo tabby

kinda gross sometimes? burps freely and does a bunch of ‘unladylike’ stuff she’s just sorta vibing and if u don’t like it too bad 

feeds stray cats 

 has a bunch of stupid tattoos 

uhhh does a lot of stupid voices? you probably heard it on her radio show

super extensive record collection-- it’s her second baby she jokes

she knows she’s a young parent but if u give her shit for it she will probably punch u 

bisexual as hell 

smokes weed... yeah but not around the kid 

connection ideas

neighbors (aurora apartments) 

friends 

listeners/fans

a babysitter

someone she’s done an ad sponsor for 

someone she’s dated casually (m/f/nb)

potentially her baby daddy but??

#this got long when i was trying to keep it short #there's a tldr tho #roswellintro #intro. #post partum depression tw #drugs tw #death tw

[riblds-blog]

❛       ｡        ❄️       ﾟ           𝗱𝗶𝗱     𝗶     𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿     𝘆𝗼𝘂     𝘀𝗮𝘆          the     steam     that     rolls     off     of     a    half     -     drunk     cup     of     earl     grey,     knitted     sweaters     and     a    perpetual     air     of     neatness          &          order,     an     abandoned     manuscript     that     haunts     the     backburner     of     a     tired     mind,     honeyed     curls     and     glances     alike,          &          the     gentle     crackling     of     a     fire     behind     you          ?          then     you     must     be     talking     about     canterbury,     i’d     recognise     them     anywhere.     i’ve     heard     that     the     twenty     -     nine     year     old     bestselling     author     is     an     aquarius     and     honestly,     i     see     it.     they’re     known     for     being     defeatist     and     monastic,     but     their     demiurgic     and     clement     tendencies     make     up     for     it.     they’ve     been     staying     at     du     lac     for     one     week     and     i     think     that     their     real     name     is     𝗷𝗮𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗿     𝗵𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗲,     but     don’t     spill.

jasper  simon  hesse  is  born  to  a  small  but  loving  family  in  canterbury,  england  on  a  particularly  cold,  blustery  evening  ;  ominous  thunder  cracks  overhead  the  minute  he  takes  his  first  discordant,  screamed  breath  and  given  the  way  his  life  unfolds,  it  all  feels  very  poetic  and  fitting.  born  to  an  english  teacher  who  writes  terrible  articles  for  cheap  magazines  and  a  french  teacher,  language  flows  in  his  blood  the  minute  he’s  born.  by  the  age  of  six,  his  mother’s  taught  him  to  speak  french  and  english  side - by - side  and  he’s  reading  whatever  he  can  get  his  grubby  little  hands  on.  his  parents  don’t  tend  to  believe  in  censorship  in  the  home,  so  jasper  grows  up  watching  and  reading  whatever  takes  his  interest   ---   children’s  movies  don’t  do  it  quite  the  same  as  creature  features  do.  it’s  in  his  early  childhood  that  a  lifelong  affair  with  horror  and  the  supernatural  is  born,  and  his  parents  are  all  too  willing  to  facilitate  it.

he’s  a  quiet  kid,  polite  and  charming  and  too  bright  for  his  own  good.  he’s  the  kid  that  sits  in  the  corner  of  the  classroom  with  a  book  that  he’s  entirely  too  young  for  whilst  the  rest  of  his  classmates  are  fooling  around  on  the  playground.  school  reports  often  wax  poetic  about  his  creativity,  his  endless  kindness,  his  chivalry  ;  they  also  warn  that  he  errs  on  antisocial  and  should  be  skinning  his  knees  and  chasing  peers  around  rather  than  poring  over  a  paperback  he  stole  from  his  mother’s  collection.  once  again,  his  parents  don’t  really  mind  ---  their  nonchalance  becomes  a  recurring  thread  when  he  unravels  his  childhood  like  needlework  he’s  not  pleased  with.

(  his  parents’  complete  lack  of  regard  stems  from  their  own  issues  ---  his  mother  has  been  suffering  with  postnatal  depression  since  jasper’s  birth,  has  slumped  into  a  shell  of  the  vivacious  human  she  once  was  and  now  that  he’s  growing  up  she  cannot  continue  to  try  for  him  anymore.  his  parents  get  a  divorce  shortly  after  jasper’s  tenth  birthday,  and  his  father  packs  him  off  to  go  live  in  london  with  him.  he  writes  to  his  mother  occasionally  within  the  times  he  doesn’t  see  her,  but  his  letters  go  mostly  unanswered.  )

london  is,  quite  possibly,  the  best  thing  that  could  happen  to  jasper.  his  father  works  long  hours  but  slips  endless  pocket  money  under  jasper’s  pillow,  a  note  attached  that  tells  him  to  go  blow  it  on  museum  tickets.  he  spends  countless  hours  wandering  around  the  british  museum,  the  v&a,  wide-eyed  and  rosy-cheeked  and  in  love  with  the  world  around  him.  it’s  in  the  cafe  at  the  v&a  that  he  scratches  out  his  first  short  story  at  twelve.  it’s  rough,  and  it’s  hardly  his  best  work,  but  he’s  pleased  enough  with  it  to  show  his  father.  his  father  (  and  really,  i  can’t  talk  enough  about  how  good  of  a  dad  daniel  hesse  is  but  more  on  that  later  )  crows  praise  for  two  days,  reads  it  out  to  his  classroom,  acts  like  jasper’s  written  a  new  york  times  bestseller  instead  of  a  monster  story  with  too  many  adjectives  on  cheap  paper  he  stole  from  his  dad’s  office.  

he  catches  the  writing  bug  hard.  all  throughout  what  remains  of  high  school  he  puts  everything  he  has  into  developing  his  writing,  and  by  the  time  he  graduates  he’s  gotten  himself  published  in  a  handful  of  moderately - respected  magazines.  shortly  after  graduation  he  applies  for  a  bachelor  of  english  language  and  literature  at  oxford  university  and  gets  in.  it’s  here  that  magic  truly  happens  ;  between  attending  classes  and  acing  them  like  it’s  absolutely  nothing,  jasper  starts  working  on  his  first  manuscript.  halfway  through  his  second  year,  he  finishes  it  and  submits  it  for  publishing,  and  ---  he’s  not  expecting  the  response  that  it  gets.  

practically  overnight,  jasper  hesse  becomes  one  of  the  hottest  new  horror  authors  on  the  market.  reviews  of  his  first  novel  are  glowing,  praising  just  about  everything  and  fuck,  if  the  whole  thing  isn’t  infectious.  he’s  twenty  years  old,  with  a  bestselling  novel  and  more  money  than  he  knows  what  do  with,  and  it’s  glorious.  work  starts  immediately  on  his  follow-up,  and  the  rest,  they  say,  is  history.

fast  forward  about  nine  years,  and  he’s  one  of  the  most  well - respected  authors  within  the  horror  genre.  with  a  bibliography  that  spans  magazines,  scholarly  journals,  novels  and  a  film  adaptation  that  he’s  still  moonstruck  about,  he’s  a  success  story  that  most  dream  of.  he  buys  his  mother  a  house  in  barcelona,  and  his  father  one  in  the  alps  --  he  visits  them  both  regularly,  and  tries  not  to  wince  when  they  ask  when  he’s  going  to  bring  a  nice  girl  home  and  start  a  family.  he’s  working  on  something  new,  but  nine  years’  worth  of  churning  out  bestsellers  has  taken  a  toll

his  agent,  a  middle - aged  woman  who  constantly  looks  concerned  about  the  state  of  unruly  curls  and  bags  under  eyes,  suggests  a  holiday  and  books  him  in  for  a  few  months  at  the  du  lac,  and  he’s  too  tired  to  argue  with  her.  

so,  that’s  how  he’s  ended  up  at  du  lac  !  he’s  trying  to  work  on  a  new  novel,  trying  to  relax,  etc  etc  etc

this  is  too  long  anyways  i’m  gna  shut  up  now  but  i  LOVE  him

#lac:intro #depression tw #ˋ ⋅ ˚ ◟ ♡ : hesse ‚ jasper simon . ︵ intro .

[hathfuryi]

why  does  having  3  characters  entail   3  intros     ...     e*thanize  me .

𝚒'𝚍  𝚋𝚎  𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚢  𝚘𝚏  𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚖  ,  𝚖𝚢  𝚏𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚍  ;   that  there  is  OLEANDER  ABERNATHY  ,  notorious  for  being (  fickle  )  and (  noncommital  ) ,  but  there  are  times  when  she  can  be ( sociable  ) and  ( urbane  ) .   i've  heard  that  she  could  pass  as  a  SAM  CLAFLIN  doppelganger  ,  but  i  don't  see  it  .   the (  thirty - three  )  year - old  cis  male  (  human  )  has  been  in  town  for (  eight  months  ) and  they  are  a  ( paranormal  investigator  ) affiliated  with (  no  one ) .   they  tend  to  spark  images  of  infidelity  despite  a  gold - banded  finger ,  misconstrued  fabrications  told  to  unsuspecting  townspeople ,  stealing  from  the  rich  to  selfishly  line  pockets  .

basics .

name :     oleander  james  abernathy age :     thirty - three dob :     april  30th zodiac :     taurus birthplace :     somewhere  in  southern  california gender :     cis  man pronouns :     he / his sexuality :     hetero

                   +   character  archetype   the  miscreant   .

behind  the  aesthetics .

infidelity  despite  a  gold - banded  finger .

y i k e s ,   the  man  be  married  and  do  be  suffering  a  bit  from  that  toxic  masculinity  ngl .   before  you  hate  him  entirely ,   just  know  he’s  never  voted  republican  and  that’s  as  redeemable  as  it’s  gna  get  w/  oleander .   anywho ,   he’s  noncommital ,   right .   doesn’t  believe  in  monogomy  so  why  should  he  practice  it ?   sure ,   he  hasn’t  exactly  come  outright  to  his  wife  abt  the  cheating ,   but  it  isn’t  like  he’s  hiding  it  either .

misconstrued  fabrications  told  to  unsuspecting  townspeople .

the  abernathy  children  have  always  enjoyed  pulling  one  over  on  those  that  trusted  them ,   much  easier  to  do  before  becoming  hardened  by  the  world ,   but  it’s  an  effortless  pastime  that  keeps  their  bills  paid  and  power  on .   wouldn’t  hire  them  as  paranormal  investigators  myself ,   their  ground - breaking  equipment  looks  a  lil  janky  if  ya  look  too  close ,   but  desperate  times   &   all  that .

stealing  from  the  rich  to  selfishly  line  pockets .

when  you’re  born  with  less  than  what  you  think  you  deserve ,   ya  may  get  a  little  resourceful  as  the  years  pass .     never  robbed  a  bank  or  committed  federal  crimes ,   but  the  bar’s  pretty  low .   anything’s  better  than  what  they  had ,   which  was     ...     literally  nothing .   started  stealing  to  fill  empty  stomachs ,   eventually  realizing  that  evening  out  the  scales  and  stealing  from  neighbors  with  nicer  things  was  convenient .   and  better  yet ,   wouldn’t  have  to  spend  a  cent   (   albiet  any  money  in  their  possession  was ,   without  a  doubt ,   stolen   )   and  could  have  anything  they  could  find  dreamt  of .

behind  the  hcs .

father  was  a  drunken  bastard ,  mother  was  a  word  that  felt  like  hollow  cries  in  the  night .  the  only  person  he’s  capable  of  loving  is  his  sister ,  the  only  constant  in  his  life ,  she’s  been  his  protector  against  all  negative  forces  (  including ,  but  not  limited  to ,  their  own  father  ) .  never  sober  long  enough  to  keep  a  job  so  supplying  sustenance  for  his  children  was  improbable .  cabinets  were  barren ,  collecting  cobwebs ,  dust  mites  and  beer  tabs .  they  started  small ,  stealing  chocolate  bars  and  gummy  worms  from  the  convenience  store  down  the  block ,  before  growing  bold .  accumulating  a  finer  taste  as  they  matured ,  oleander  and  ondine  began  by  dipping  their  toes  in  petty  thieving .  pick - pocketing  the  decrepit ,  breaking  into  vacation  homes .  you  name  it ,  they’ve  done  it .

not  to  say  that  oleander’s  father   &   lack  of  a  positive  maternal  figure  is  to  blame  for  the  way  that  he  is ,   it  certainly  hasn’t  helped .   plenty  distinct  memories  of  physical  altercations  with  intentions  of  hardening  him  into  a  man .   the  only  person  that’s  ever  kept  him  in  check  was  ondine  and  she’s  the  only  person  oleander  has  ever  genuinely  cared  about .

dabbles  a  bit  in  selling  on  the  side .  it’s  easy  pocket  change ,  and  as  long  as  rent  is  paid  in  full  each  month ,  what  difference  does  it  make ,  right ?  don’t  tell  ondine  or  she  might  just  keel  over .

not  exactly  the  type  you’d  envision  selling  anything ,   something  of  a  pretty  boy  tbh .   wouldn’t  do  oleander  (   or  ondine   )   any  good  if  she  found  out  about  his  little  side  business .   they’ve  hardly  been  able  to  pay  the  bills  with  the  money  that’s  coming  in  from  their  skam  of  a  business ,   so  what  if  he  slips  an  extra  hundo  in  their  rent  jar .   it’s  beneficial  to  him  that  he  step  up  and  secure  the  roof  over  their  heads .   doesn’t  want  ondine  to  feel  like  she’s  to  blame  for  their  being  stuck  in  watermount .

incapable  of  feeling  real ,  genuine  love ,  disconcerting  considering  oleander  is  married .  loves  women ,  but  being  faithful  to  one ?  that’s  a  no .  doesn’t  like  feeling  restricted ,  suffocated .  as  far  as  oleander’s  concerned ,  monogamy  is  dull  and  he’s  disinterested .

oh  yes ,   he  do  be  lovin’  women  like  it’s  no  one’s  business .   if  he  wasn’t  meant  to  have  different  women  in  bed  each  week ,   then  why  are  they  all  so  irresistible ?   riddle  him  that .

wanted  connections .

nada  thing  atm ,   might  add  smth  here  eventually .

#hell.intro #whew we fightin off exhaustion but these #bitches just b gettin worse

[leofcwler]

( austin butler, cismale ) did you hear how LEO FOWLER is applying to columbia university as a FORENSICS SCIENCE major ?! the 21 year old is living in the WATT HALL. i heard that they got in because they are + CHARISMATIC and +EFFERVESCENT, but honestly i think HE can be - CALLOUS and - RECKLESS. they’re a real ANOMALY. oh well, only time will tell if the JUNIOR will make it til the end. 

struts in thru a bead curtain w a martini in hand........... hlo everyone! i’m bri, n im a painfully awkward canadian 21 years of age!! i haven’t been in a group this big in wht feels like 1000 years n leo is a completely new char...... so im a wee bit intimidated bt?? ready to Party (the crowd goes wild). i have a habit of not sleeping so theres a chance im gna b on 24/7 wonks..... give this a like n i will come running to u naruto style to plot!!

TW: neglect, drugs/drug abuse, overdose, hospitalization

ABOUT LEO

aight so leo’s dad? real estate agent n his mom is a nurse. they live pretty average boring lives?? considering tht leo is like the opposite of Average or Boring he used to lie n say tht his dad was an astronaut lost in space and his mum was a mermaid at a freak show, so. however when he was 12 his parents suddenly divorced literally out of nowhere bc lo n behold leo’s dad was having an affair so........ guess he wasnt as boring as leo thought??

his mom moved out n he doesn’t rly see her a lot any more, she doesn’t rly kno wht to do w leo when she does see him?? he’ll go over and be like ‘im gonna JF kennedy trump’ n then his mom will burst into tears and start crying abt how this wasn’t the boy she raised it’s a whole gross mess so he stopped going over so tht she didn’t get sad n he didn’t get uncomfortable

his dad didn’t NEGLECT leo bt after the divorce he certainly didn’t take his time in caring abt his sons whereabouts n what not. leo had always been raised in a kind of carefree house anyway since his mom worked a bunch of random overnight shifts n what not n she was the more strict one, bt it got to the point where leo wld jokingly talk abt burning down the house to see how his dad wld react and all he’d get is a nod and asked to bring his dad another beer SO

he got kinda bored of trying to get his dads attention with no luck, so one day he ended up buying fireworks tht were COMPLETELY illegal from a vendor on the Sketchy Side Of Town and set them off outside of school...... he had expected to get into trouble n his dad wld have to do sommething abt it bt one of the fireworks ended up exploding and breaking several windows n leo got expelled big time

his dad kinda freaked bc the only other school in the super small town he grew up in was a pretty expensive private school tht he cld barely afford

leo hated it............ wld show up to school purposely out of uniform/wld graffiti the walls/did the most to get detentions jst so he cld stay later n avoid going home etc.............. one time he showed up after cutting the pants into shorts tht left almost nothing to the imagination n got suspended fr it

miraculously got into columbia bc even tho he fucked around in school he was actually quite smart?? cld have probably gotten a scholarship if he actually tried bt Trying jst isn’t leo’s style apparently

although he didn’t have too many friends growing up he did have a few tht he purposely hand selected bc he knew they were jst . not a good influence at all?? got him into the party scene in a pretty awful n intense way, he’d been hospitalized more than a handful of times fr alcohol poisoning n he even OD’ed on coke once which . made him realize tht maybe the whole Doing Coke For Fun At A Party thing was just an excuse now. the hospital offered to get him into a rehab program bt he refused to admit he had a problem even tho he still does coke jst a WEE BIT too much to this day

personality wise he’s kind of a lot to handle?? will turn around and insult u then b confused as to why ur offended he jst.......... doesn’t have a filter and also doesn’t realize he’s being rude cuz he was never rly taught to jst . calm down n think abt words before he says them

is waiting for aliens to come down and take over his body/the earth. a genuine believer in them n all things supernatural......... still thinks he’s possessed after a bad flu when he was 14

tbh he like to make ppl purposely uncomfortable sometimes . watching ppl squirm n blush? his fave thing

majoring in forensics science bc ?? he was obsessed with forensic files growing up and always wanted to be the person tht was like . “We found his fingerprints on the doorknob.”

ironically his star sign is leo

pansexual king.................... a mess when it comes to relationships he doesn’t rly know how to properly be in one bt he actually likes them. also likes to jst . sleep around when he can, being w ppl is kind of his fave thing bc he subconsciously doesn’t think ppl want him fr anything other than sex n stuff like tht it’s a mess

TENTATIVELY TOSSED TOGETHER WANTED CONNECTIONS

he does need some friends tbh

a bro he’s w 24/7?? aka Best Friend uwu

a girl he’s rly close w too bt everyone thinks they’re dating?? n they’re always like . ew thts weird

exes!! on bad and good terms............. Give It To Me

also fwb’s.............. needs lots of Those

someone who tutors him?? he has the attention span of a walnut so wld need help

ppl he deals to?? literally collects drugs jst to feel comforted by the fact tht he has them bt has WAY TOO MANY to take so he sells them when he can

enemies!! i figure he may have . a lot of these siodghoidg

unrequited crushes........... him to someone else or someone to him either way it Works

someone in general tht he is jst . head over heels fr............ disgustingly into to the point where he writes them trash poetry abt wanting everyone else on the earth to disappear so it cld b jst them n stuff

ANYTHING!! the world?? our oyster............

#columbiaintro #wipes the sweat from my brow #drugs tw #drug abuse tw #neglect tw #hospitalization tw #overdose tw #jeez louise #hope this isnt a MESS #sry if theres any mistakes.......... yolo! #like this n i will come to u wonks

[kathvrines-blog]

i’m only 1298338 yrs late....pls forgive me & here is my intro !!!

KATHERINE YU, THE PUBLICITY OFFICER OF THE YALE ELITES. SHE'S 20 AND A SOPHOMORE MAJORING IN PUBLIC RELATIONS. SHE'S AS ASTUTE AS SHE IS DUPLICITOUS.

tw: drugs

she slept with the dean of admissions in order to access and tamper with student files and collect dirt on students to use as leverage

she started using cocaine for fun but ended up with an addiction

after having katherine, her mom could not conceive again and her father resents both of them for the situation. he continuously cheats on her mother, who knows about the affairs but does not leave to protect the family image. katherine threatened to expose her father, who retaliated by halting funding her tuition. katherine steals money from her father (with the help of her mother) to continue paying for school and her luxurious lifestyle. 

ok now for a deeper look into kat:

katherine’s dad is the head of this fancy private construction company (hehe...this is gonna b some future blackmail and yes i’m ripping off the show elite) and her mom was a supermodel in her youth but is now a trophy wife (she’s still significantly younger than kat’s dad btw)...basically a rly odd pairing, but her mom liked that he was rich yet not afraid 2 get his hands dirty & kind of rough around the edges

basically her dad got her mom pregnant as fast as he could once they got married because he wanted a child 2 pass the company on to

so katherine’s dad was angry that his first born was a girl but maybe he could have lived w it if her mom could produce more kids...except she couldn’t. so he hated them both and kat was like i fucking hate u back?? anyway

she grew up hating her dad as much as he hated her n the only times he was nice 2 her was when the cameras were around 

kat was always closer to her mom but lowkey she knows that if her mom had 2 pick between her n her dad.....she’d pick her dad. the only persons validation kat wants is her moms :,( but anyway

because kat always had a closer bond to her mom, when she found out he was cheating on her a bitch was PISSED !!! even tho her mom KNEW and didnt care because the parents were just together for the sake of their image at this point, kat was like >:( 

at first she just did shit to scare off his mistresses but eventually that stopped working so she went 2 her dad and was like. if u dont STOP i’m gna tell the world!! not her smartest move bc he was like lol...dumb bitch i pay for everything u have !! so he stopped paying for her shit to teach her a lesson

so what did she do next to pay for school n her lifestyle ?? get a job? SIKE !! she slept with the guy that manages her dads bank acc to steal from him & make it look not sus. her mom lowkey helps cover for it because she feels guilty for being a shitty mom

just putting it out there kat literally wants to kill her dad. she wants that man DEAD like she 100% intends to kill him one day HERSELF, she’s just holding off until she’s certain she will get away with it

aside from that, kat does the MOST to get attention from ppl since shes so ignored at home and wants to be thought and talked abt. thats why she’s like an ~insta baddie~ 

no basically she’s just kind of ig famous and she’s always partnering w brands blah blah it’s why she majored in public relations even tho she doesnt rly intend on doing much with her major she kind of has it in case she RLY has to fend for herself one day. a bitch got smarter after threatening her dad. now she’s always scheming and getting close to ppl so she can use them when it’s in her benefit

kat is a sagittarius sun, scorpio moon, and gemini rising.....because that’s a little chaotic :) basically she comes off pretty friendly and sociable. most ppl from the outside think she’s a nice good christian girl, always wearing her cross necklace n going to church on sunday (the cross is where she keeps her coke...but we’ll get to that in jus one second) but in reality she’s just a lowkey evil >:))) binch. she cares abt only a few ppl...stay tuned for who because i havent plotted yet

drug tw: my girl was partying one day in high school when she snorted her first line of coke for the lolz but then she enjoyed it so she did it again...and then again and again. basically...she has an addiction. she’s come close 2 overdosing a couple times but she can’t stop. most ppl don’t kno how bad her addiction is but maybe someone in the group was there for one of her overdoses....plot idea perhaps ? anyway

overall i would describe kat as a mix between kathryn merteuil from cruel intentions (who she was first based on + named after) and carla from the show elite. she’s jus always scheming n trying to make herself important because she LOVES being in the spotlight and being talked about

basically,,,,, she’s two-faced but most people only know her fake social “nice” side, even most members of the elites prob

except maybe her nasty side showed a little when they tried to get her kicked from the group....but she pretends shes not mad abt it anymore...even tho she def is still very pissed. she’s a fire sign after all she can hold a GRUDGE

ok this is long i’m done :)) please plot with me i’m desperate

#✧.° — crying tears of gold like lemonade › ( ooc. ) #eliteintros

[maiverie]

triage — ft. lee heeseung (chapter I)

you try to teach the nerd how to date.

synopsis: heeseung is not, by any measure, date-able. he’s dorky, he’s nerdy, and he does this weird thing where he snorts loudly every time he laughs. in fact, he loves everything that normal people are allergic to — computer science, collecting rare comic books, and birdwatching on the weekend.

given that you two have obviously nothing in common, you find yourself utterly flabbergasted when you receive a letter in your locker, on which heeseung has written, "hi. will you please teach me how to date?"

pairing: lee heeseung x fem!reader

genres: romance, comedy, fluff, high school | written series

au(s): nerd!heeseung, popular girl!reader, (kind of) fake dating, “nope. no. there is no fucking way i could ever be attracted to a boy that plays sudoku in star wars pajamas” au, cute opposites attract (!!!), light mutual pining angst

contents: a cinderella story in which you transform heeseung into a hot boy and start panicking bc you’re not supposed to be attracted to him but u are —or— you're the popular girl with a thousand insecurities and heeseung can see right through u

featuring: txt, itzy

warnings: swearing, mentions of drug use, lowercase intended, some suggestive scenes :>

kayla’s playlist ♡ my shitty og playlist . tag : #.*triage

a/n: this fic is solely inspired by hee's pics from the 2022 seasons greetings. screaming crying HEE IN GLASSES HAS ME IN CHAINS. anyway omg i hope u give this fic a chance! this is gna be wild ASDFKLJ i’m so excited for this :DD

chapter one

word count: 4.3k | navigation: next / masterlist

warnings: swearing, mentions of drug use, VERY BAD chemistry jokes.

‎‎‏‏‎ ‎

hi. the handwriting reads. will you please teach me how to date?

it’s 8am.

it’s monday morning.

you’re hungover, your head is violently throbbing, and you can barely stand without wanting to bend forward and hurl last night’s contents. you’re in no condition to be at school, let alone the receiving end of a handwritten letter that’s been delivered into your locker.

will you please teach me how to date?

teach who how to what? you squint at the letter, though the tenebrous shade of your sunglasses shadows your ability to see the handwriting clearly. even without the glasses, you know you’d be having a hard time regardless, because whoever has written this odd letter embodies all the stereotypes of a doctor’s handwriting.

flabbergasted, your eyes dart toward the bottom of the letter, where the mysterious author has signed their name in bold letters.

kind regards, lee heeseung.

you frown.

kind regards?

lee heeseung?

what the—

suddenly, the letter is snatched from your hands. you frown from the abrupt action, prompting you to snap your head toward the side.

“hey!” you scowl at your friend, ryujin, who responds with a soft snicker. she playfully dangles the letter in front of you before gripping it with both her acrylic claws.

“another letter?” she whistles, a sculpted brow lifting as her eyes lazily rake the paper. “jeez, miss popular, this is like the tenth one since last week.”

“just shut up and give it back.” you roll your eyes, attempting to steal it from her grasp. your friend easily evades your strike by stepping to the side, her lifelong immunity to hangovers working to her advantage. she’s a witch. she has to be — there’s no way she’s still standing straight after everything she sculled last night.

ryujin snorts. “teach me how to date?” her loud voice reverberates so loudly through the school hallways that you cringe from the volume. “dude, what the heck is this?”

you shrug. “you tell me,” you grumble, facing your locker with a frown. with a hefty sigh, you rummage through the piles of trash inside your locker, seizing your white headphones from it. “found it just then.”

“kind regards, lee heeseung?” ryujin suddenly ruptures into cacophonous laughter, instantly triggering the pounding of your head. you wince at the pain, feeling your brain rattle inside your skull. fuck this. you’re never drinking again. tequila is the devil’s favourite beverage, and while it may have successfully seduced you last night, you’re never allowing that again.

“oh hell nah, he did not just sign off with kind regards,” ryujin sniggers. “the fuck is this? some kind of professional work email? an agenda? ha! this just made my morning.”

“can you pipe the fuck down?” you growl, shutting your locker as you rip the letter out of her hands. “you’re so loud that i might just return you back to the animal shelter.”

your friend cackles at your joke, arms knotting across her chest as her back touches the row of lockers beside yours. “looks like someone’s grouchy.” she observes with an innocent smile. “did last night really hit you that hard?”

you? grouchy? she’s mistaken if she thinks she’s offended you, because grouchy might just be the only word that can describe you — you’re the reincarnation of the old man from up, or squidward from spongebob. rarely nothing impresses you, as evident in your trademark frown.

and oh god — even at the mention of last night makes your gastric contents gurgle inside your stomach. you wouldn’t be all too surprised if it surged up your esophagus and caused you to projectile vomit all over your friend. had it been your choice, you would’ve skipped monday classes for a proper eight-hour sleep, but your brother was insistent. “how do you expect to graduate when you’re always hanging out with ryujin and her dumbass friends?” you recall jake nagging in his usual pretentious tone. “i’m driving you to school. get in the car.”

ignoring ryujin, you sling your handbag over your shoulder. the both of you make your way down the hallway, parting seas of people.

momentary silence befalls the two of you, and while you desperately hope it continues this way, it’s inevitable that your talkative friend eventually punctures the peace by lightly nudging your elbow.

“so… we’re just not going to talk about that weirdo lee heeseung?”

“what’s there to talk about?” you mumble, adjusting the sunglasses on your face. “i don’t even know who that is.”

it’s only 8am and you’re already lying — you know exactly who lee heeseung is.

he sticks out like a sore thumb.

he’s the top student; he’s the one with perfect grades, the one that wears his pristine, untarnished uniform to a fault, and the one whose brown deer-like eyes are hidden behind big round glasses. he’s always the one delivering the principal’s address during assemblies. he always wears both backpack straps snugly and even tucks his thumbs underneath them when he walks. his shoes are never soiled and you’ve never seen a strand of his dark brown hair in disarray.

he’s every parent’s greatest fantasy and every child’s least favourite sibling.

“you know, heeseung. the guy with the glasses? the four-eyed dweeb that’s attached to the headmaster’s hip?” ryujin eyes you, offended by your ignorance. you feign a nonchalant shrug.

“seriously? you don’t know who i’m talking about? he’s literally in our math class. jeez, you’re so self-involved.”

front row, you remember. he sits in the front row, with his pencils and gudetama-patterned notebooks and star wars pencil case all neatly perfectly aligned on his desk. you stare at the back of his head way too often, but only because it always manages to look the exact same no matter what day it is.

he might just be an android.

“teach me how to date,” ryujin echoes his words with a snigger. “what kind of pick up line is that? why couldn’t he have asked to bone like any other normal person?” she snorts. “and jeez, the nerve of the guy since everyone knows you’re practically dating taehyun. and not gonna lie, i’m kinda surprised he doesn’t want to date someone from his own species—”

“shut up.”

“—like, i’m sure there’s some sort of robot he can procreate with. dude, what do you think the compatibility between lee heeseung and siri is? must be like ninety-nine point nine percent. and holy fuck their babies would actually be insane—”

“ryujin. shut up.”

ryujin looks at you with an offended expression at your sudden interruption, though your eyes are trained ahead of you.

there.

heeseung’s there.

you stare at him from across the hallway, noticing the commotion. a few people are crowded around his locker, including heeseung, taehyun, and some of the latter’s friends.

heeseung looks awfully uncomfortable, because he’s staring off at the side with his fingers twiddling the bottom of his blazer. taehyun, on the other hand, is speaking at him with a smirk.

before you know it, you’re already shoving your way past the masses of student bodies. as you near the disturbance, once incomprehensible syllables are now melded into coherent sentences that float in the air.

“c’mon, dude, be cool.” taehyun. “just for today. if anything goes wrong, your dad’s got your back, right?”

“a-ah, i don’t know…” a soft voice mutters. it’s heeseung. of course it’s heeseung — he doesn’t strike you as anything other than soft-spoken, and when you’re finally close enough, you know it to be true.

“but, heeseungie,” taehyun chuckles, a twinge of condescension evident in his tone. it’s in his classic trademark — taehyun’s always prudent enough to never be outrightly hostile, though he never refuses the opportunity to inject just the tiniest amount of condescension. “just this once. you don’t want your friend to go into juvie, do you? hm?”

“taehyun.” you announce your presence with a stern voice. heeseung, taehyun and his accompanying friends all snap their heads up at you, though ironically heeseung’s eyes are the first pair that yours encounter.

his mousy eyes widen slightly in recognition, and you notice he stands a little straighter when he sees you. he uses a finger to slide his wire gold-rimmed glasses higher up his button nose, gulping once at your stare. you say nothing, though your eyes follow the length of his pristine uniform. his perfectly ironed blazer is embellished with various badges of achievement, accompanying the long school tie that runs the length of his chest.

“oh, hey babe.” taehyun remarks casually. you tear your eyes from heeseung’s, eyeing taehyun with a frown.

“what are you doing?” you ask.

“just hanging out with my best friend.” he answers, using his chin to gesture toward heeseung. you feel a prick of annoyance at taehyun’s comment — does he always have to be an ass? sure, heeseung may be the four-eyed dweeb ryujin likes to call him, but there’s no way he’s stupid enough to not hear taehyun’s mockery.

“let’s go to class.” you counter, potentially de-escalating the situation. you know how taehyun can be — sometimes, all it takes is a single word and things can go south real quick.

“yeah, in a bit.” he brushes you off, turning back to heeseung with a wicked grin. “so what do you say? you’ll take the drug test for me?”

“taehyun.” you seethe.

he throws his head back with a loud sigh. “babe, respectfully, piss off.” he gives you the side-eye. “class can wait.”

a scoff bounces from your chest. “the headmaster is looking for you,” you sneer. it’s a lie, but you can’t help that this is your speciality — you’re an excellent liar, and in situations like these, words come flowing out your mouth like water. “i saw him earlier this morning. he’s probably patrolling the hallways just in case you’re trying to get out of the drug test.”

“wait, for real? fuck.” taehyun immediately groans. he rolls his eyes in annoyance before eyeing heeseung. he then reaches over and ruffles the boy’s hair, flashing a contemptuous smirk. “i gotta go. let’s talk later?”

before heeseung has the opportunity to reply, taehyun has already begun to make his exit. you watch his back disappear, satisfaction bringing the edge of your lips into a small smirk.

success!

your lips then immediately fall into a frown, while you turn over your shoulder with a murderous glower. “what the fuck do you guys want?” you ask with a sneer, scowling at the bystanders that had formed a crowd. they slowly dissipate, seemingly disappointed that they weren’t there to witness a fight. as they scatter away, you turn back around and face heeseung, lips pressed into a thin line.

he stares at you, eyelashes fluttering with soft blinks.

“oh, um, th-thanks.”

you merely stare, mind mostly set on the letter you had just found in your locker. perhaps this is not the time nor place to acknowledge it.

“don’t block the footpath next time.” you say curtly, before grabbing ryujin to yank her away.

tap. tap. tap.

a prank?

tap. tap. tap.

it must have been a prank.

countless explanations for the odd letter heeseung had left in your locker have plagued your mind. you’re in math class, boring holes into the back of heeseung’s chair, bouncing the back of your pen onto the desk.

tap. tap. tap.

maybe it wasn’t from him. perhaps someone just signed it off with his name as a joke.

tap. tap. tap.

regardless, you need to get a lock on your damn locker before weirder letters come flooding in. yep. you’re definitely getting a lock.

tap. tap. ta—

“dude, can you fucking quit it?” ryujin hisses from your side, snatching your pen from you. “the noise is driving me crazy.”

“shut up, as if you’re even listening.” you snipe back, grabbing your pen from her. she rolls her eyes at you, resting her head against her folded arms on the desk. “whatever. wake me up when class is done.”

this is routine for the two of you — you both have always found solace in the seats at the back of the classroom, where other students don’t bother you and teachers don’t care enough to monitor. hence, while ryujin sleeps, you continue to stare at heeseung’s empty seat, albeit befuddled at his absence from class.

you’re pretty sure the boy has never skipped class in his entire life.

and it’s not even that you’re particularly interested in heeseung’s whereabouts — you couldn’t care less, although mr lee himself seems quite frazzled. he appears to be desperately trying to stay collected for the sake of the class, though you notice he’s been nervously and worriedly glancing at heeseung’s seat since class began.

you observe mr lee for the next few minutes, until eventually the older man’s composure completely ruptures. “could someone please go find heeseung?” the teacher begs, tapping the boy’s desk. “he’s never missed a single class.”

you immediately turn away in disinterest, before you suddenly arrive at an epiphany.

is this your chance to get out of class?

every attempt you’ve ever made to skip class has been shot down by all your teachers. the number of times you’ve asked to go the bathroom has apparently been excessive, to the point your parents have even received several emails in which teachers have recommended a doctor’s visit in concern for your bladder health.

holy shit. this is totally your opportunity and you need to seize it before anyone else does!

you quickly shoot up your hand, and the speed with which you do this instantly captures mr lee’s attention. he blinks at you, presumably surprised you even know who heeseung is at all, though you rise to your feet and slap on a cordial smile.

“sure. i’ll go,” you shrug, walking out from behind your desk. you notice ryujin has woken from your noise, though you’re already out the door before another word can be said.

this wasn’t your plan.

you didn’t plan this.

all you really wanted to do was spend an hour taking a nap in the school’s hidden back garden, call it a day and say “i looked everywhere and couldn’t find him. sorry teach”, but nothing went according to plan.

in fact, it would have benefitted you more to not have been able to locate heeseung so easily, but he didn’t exactly make it difficult. you were already on your way out the school through the back entrance when you had spotted the familiar silhouette of his back profile — there he was, seated on a bench in the school’s community garden, accompanied by a girl whose name has slipped your mind.

maybe… lia?

they appear to be engaging in a serious conversation. and since you’re obviously way too nosy to walk away, you crouch behind a bush and veil yourself behind a few tall shrubs and hedges. as you shuffle closer toward the pair, you begin to question the absurdity of this situation, though you remember that you’ve done weirder things.

one time, on a dare, you signed up to a dating app and catfished your principal.

another time, also on a dare (maybe you should probably stop picking dare), you had dressed up as slenderman and chased kids down the street until they pissed their pants.

this — eavesdropping on a missing classmate — is really not the weirdest thing you’ve done.

“sorry, you’re just… not my type. like at all.” the girl winces. oh fuck, did he confess? you might only be a spectator, but the awkwardness in the air can be tasted.

“o-oh.” his soft voice replies. you think he needs to stop speaking like that — if there’s anything girls like, it’s assertiveness. he’s too soft-spoken, it makes him vulnerable to people that could eat him alive. “sorry.”

oh god, you want to groan aloud. now he’s apologising? you begin to wonder how many of the dating no-no’s he’s going to commit.

“whatever. can i… go back to class now?” the girl sighs tiredly. you angle your head a little higher and notice that she’s folding her arms. this is your opportunity to examine her face. huh. she’s pretty. she’s got sparkling eyes and pouty lips that you know guys go insane for. at least heeseung’s got taste, you think, though she seems like kind of a bitch.

and from one bitch to another, you’re probably the most qualified to say this.

“s-sorry.”

no!

how many fucking times is this ding dong going to apologise?

“for fuck’s sake.” you mutter to yourself, frustrated beyond belief. you shake your head in disapproval, ducking slightly when they briefly look in your direction.

“it’s fine.” the girl sighs. “anyway, you’re still going to help me with my homework, right?” the girl asks. say no, heeseung. say no. say fuck you, say i’ve got better things to do than do your crusty ass homework, say get lost and learn how to read yourself you moronic imbecile!

“oh, y-yes… sorry,” you cringe again, “i totally forgot. i’ll give it to you tomorrow… s-sorry.”

oh.

dear.

god.

this has to be one of the most frustrating and aggravating conversations you’ve ever tuned into. if there’s anything you detest most, it’s people that apologise for no reason, and it’s also people that make others feel the need to apologise. whatever happened to reserving the word for when it really matters?

“aw, thanks, hee. you’re the best.” you watch her lean forward and plant a soft kiss on heeseung’s cheek, effectively giving you all the explanation you need to justify how the boy could’ve ever thought to confess to a girl like this. she gives him just enough sustenance to survive, though she’s always sure to draw the line when he’s too close. it’s the oldest trick in the book, and if you’re being really honest, you’re the best at it.

the girl leaves without another word, now leaving heeseung alone on the bench. for a few seconds, you watch him — he has his eyes set on the ground beneath his feet, brows scrunched and lips dipped into a small frown. perhaps he’s trying to analyse where things had gone wrong — perhaps he’s rethinking all the past interactions he had with the girl and if he misinterpreted things.

you know this because that’s precisely how dating games work — they gaslight you into thinking you had concocted delusional narratives in your own head.

hence, “ouch,” is all you say.

heeseung snaps his head backward at you, shocked by your sudden presence. you rise to your feet, brushing off the dirt from your skirt.

“that was painful to watch.” you continue, watching as his eyes appear as though they’ll pop out his sockets and roll on the grass. you’re probably going to send the poor boy into some sort of cardiac arrest. “and by the way, did you know mr lee is worried sick about you and you’re trying to get into some girl’s pants?”

“w-what? pants?” he springs to his feet, blinking rapidly. you try not to smirk so widely, but his reactions are so entertaining. he’s too transparent. he’s almost like a puppy — his reactions are pure and honest; everything you see is what you get. it’s refreshing, you think. most people aren’t like that these days.

“he’s disappointed.” you tsk, shaking your head solemnly. “can’t believe his best student’s out here trying to get his dick wet—”

heeseung gasps from your crude language, so you stifle a chuckle. “i’m just kidding, okay? chill.”

the boy huffs. “you… you didn’t see the entire thing, did you?”

you nod guiltily. “i kinda did.”

heeseung softly groans aloud before he seats himself back on the bench. he props his elbow up on the armrest and sinks his cheek into his palm. you stifle another laugh, this time shuffling closer toward him. “it wasn’t all that bad. you just… you need to stop apologising.”

“i don’t know, i just… i thought she liked me.” he mumbles. “she kept…” he shakes his head. “nevermind.”

you raise a brow. “laughing at your jokes? touching your arm? smiling at you from across the room?”

heeseung snaps his head toward you and nods rapidly. “yes!” he cries, like you’ve just read his mind. “that’s exactly what she would do. i-i would make these chemistry jokes, and… she would laugh and call me funny…”

“hate to break it to you buddy, but she was probably just doing that so you’d do her homework.” you say a little too tersely, now sitting on the bench with him. “and besides, chemistry jokes? when the fuck have chemistry jokes ever been funny?”

heeseung pouts. “well… what do you call an acid with an attitude?”

your brows dig into your face. “what?”

“a-mean-o acid.”

oh god.

he’s doomed.

he’ll die a virgin.

you physically face-palm, groaning aloud as he softly giggles. he’s laughing at his own joke? oh god. you think you hear the sounds of your fallopian tubes shrivelling up and dying. better yet, they’re sucking their eggs right back up the reproductive system.

he’s hopeless. he’s tragic. and he totally reminds you of your dad, because back when you were younger, your father used to make the same types of jokes. they’re called dad jokes for a reason.

“wait, i got one.” you snap your fingers, suddenly remembering something your dad had told you one night when he was tucking you into bed. “what did the man say when his wife threw sodium and chloride at him?”

heeseung blinks curiously. “what?”

“that’s as-salt!”

heeseung instantly snorts a laugh, and you’re so thrown off by the noise that you snap your head at him.

did he just… snort loudly?

the small glimpse of the pretty smile you were able to catch immediately vanishes as quickly as it appeared when he realised what he’s done.

heeseung’s eyes widen with slight embarrassment as he looks away and tries to cover his reaction with a cough.

but he’s too late, because you saw everything — you saw the way his eyes curled upward when he laughed, and the way his nose wrinkled underneath his little glasses. and honestly, you don’t mind his smile. you like it. it’s… wholesome. most guys you know don’t like to smile — it’s always a smirk, or a tough frown, or worse, that overly-forced stoic expression you’ve never thought was attractive.

“are these jokes too basic for you?” you continue in jest. “because i’m not getting much of a reaction.”

heeseung stifles another laugh, though you cringe from your joke. you’re both softly laughing now, which lessens much of the tension from earlier. and though you notice that heeseung has seemingly begun to forget about what had happened with lia, there’s no way you’re not taking this opportunity to not mention the letter you found in your locker.

“by the way,” you reach into the pocket of your skirt, earning heeseung’s curious gaze. “you left this in my locker.”

you hold out the lined piece of paper that heeseung had written his letter on. at first, he’s eyeing it with confusion, until you watch his face change the instant he realises what it is.

a red glow diffuses across his cheeks once again while he blinks at it in embarrassment. “o-oh.” he blushes profusely, grabbing the letter from you. “s-sorry—”

“stop apologising.” you snap. “and also, don’t leave weird shit in my locker ever again, or i’ll fill yours with shaving cream.”

heeseung nods rapidly. you smile, watching him adjust his hair nervously. “d-did you—”

“read it? of course i did.” you narrow your eyes. “you’re a fucking weirdo, you know that?”

heeseung pouts. “i… i left it a month ago, okay? i just… i was confused.”

you blink. oh.

you thought he had given it to you this morning. but you suppose this makes sense, because you’re not exactly the best at cleaning out your locker — it’s always filled to the brim like a landfill, and the only reason you’d even rummaged through it this morning was to retrieve your headphones.

“didn’t realise you’ve liked lia for that long.” you comment, noticing he likes to play the long-run. you, on the other hand, are obsessed with short-lived fantasies.

“n-no, actually, i… i liked someone else at that time and… i don’t know, i.. i thought you could help, since you’re friends with—”

“you liked ryujin?!” you screech loudly. heeseung gasps at your volume, placing a finger across his lips. how did you deduce that from the little information? it’s easy — you’ve got one friend and one friend only — shin ryujin. you might be popular, but you can only really tolerate a small subset of people.

“n-no! i-i mean, yes… i — not anymore!” he stammers. “s-she was really nice to me when—”

“and let me guess, you did her homework too.”

heeseung lowers his head and nods solemnly.

oh god.

he’s fucking hopeless.

how long is he going to let women play him like a little toy?

“i can teach you how to date if you really want,” you shrug, and he instantly snaps his head up at you and stares with those big starry eyes of his. “but it’s obviously going to take a lot of work given what i’m working with.”

“r-really? y-you’ll help?”

“why not?” you sigh. “you’re the first person to write me a letter that didn’t include a drawing of your dick.”

heeseung scrunches his nose up in disgust. “you’ve really gotten that before?”

you nod. “men are trash,” you announce, thinking about the way taehyun had treated you this morning. the hot ones are always trash. “and if i can teach at least one of you from your wretched species how to be a normal fucking human being, i’ll do it.”

heeseung finally smiles, and you make the mistake of looking over and staring at it. you’re already swept up in it. it’s pretty. it’s really pretty. he’s got the prettiest smile you've ever seen, and maybe you’ll admit that it’s contagious.

“thank you,” he whispers.

you feel tiny amounts of heat begin to branch up your neck and cheeks before you turn away in an attempt to stifle down your emotions.

this might just be the most interesting decision you’ve ever made.

//

to be continued.

a/n: hello fellow heeseung simps <3 ngl i normally only like tsundere-like characters but the thought of heeseung being this dorky, innocent, simp ass little nerd has me feeling some typa way I CANT EXPLAIN ITTT 😭 omfg im really not sure that this was the quality i was hoping to achieve but im gna lose it if i have to read this chapter one more time 😭 anyway im hoping the next few chappies turn out well 🤞 or i might just unalive myself :> anywayyyy i'd love to hear what u all thought (good or bad)! do pls support me by liking + reblogging if u can :>>

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