#i want to exist again

[sibelin]

i'll pretend i didn't just have breakdown like i do five times a week ✌️

#i'm sorry guys #this week has been really tough #i don't feel comfortable anywhere. not at work not at home and not here either #and it's been affecting me a lot. i'm so lonely here. i wish i was with my family rn. or with anyone who could tell me i'm worth something #i feel like i'm not even human anymore. i am a fake person at work. here i know people will avoid interacting with me when sad. #but i'm stuck bc i struggle living alone and i struggle making connections so ofc i'm sad #idk i'm so tired. i need shoulder to cry on but all i got is this blog and people liking my posts #all that bc i moved far away from everyone and then realized i was nothing to my friends #i want to exist again #please let me be someone i'm so scared #anyway anyway back to posting memes so people like me

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

not "i ship these characters" or "i want them to bond platonically" but a secret 3rd thing (I want them to be forced to interact by the Narrative bc they would HATE that)

#who needs romance when i can watch two narrative foils painfully tolerate each other's existence #bonus points if they are forced to Work Together To Solve A Problem #and they end up working surprisingly well together! #they make a surprisingly effective team! #they even confide some backstory with each other & bond a bit & understand each other better #and when it's all over they shake hands & amicably agree that they still cannot fucking stand each other #'this was an interesting sidequest & I'm glad we got to experience it. #but all things considered i genuinely never want to see your face again' #Enemies to Chained-Up-In-An-Abandoned-Bathroom-Together #to Enemies #two stray cats forced to share a cat carrier for a trip to the vet

[astralpenguin]

self care is writing a fic that you’re literally the sole target audience for

#nobody was asking for a spn pmmm crossover fic focusing on claire at 14 #who by this point has already been manipulated into agreeing to something without knowing all the terms and conditions first #and it was awful and the worst day of her life #so when kyubey approaches her she doesn't go for it #but the people around her do and so claire gets to watch people she loves die horribly AGAIN #like there is nothing in spn canon that contradicts any of this #but literally nobody is wanting a fic like this to exist #nobody except for me #so i guess i have to do everything myself around here #el talks

[theclaygolem]

Chop chop chop

#clayart #one piece #op #tony tony chopper #roronoa zoro #yup forgot tumbr existed again my b #i want to use it more than twt but im set in my old ways rip #anyways i took a big fat break due to health and now im back so YIPPIE #just shoving stuff on every platform seeing how it goes

[qiinamii]

3.4 lantern rite log

[context for the 3rd one]

#this patch isnt even xiao-centric but its definitely a highlight he singlehandedly took by being socially awkward #he's just trying to exist let him be #xiao the uhh guy its in his vocabulary never tell me otherwise #qiiarts #xiao #lumine #traveler #paimon #zhongli #venti #hu tao #xingqiu #xiangling #chongyun #again 2 posts in one day i just want to get this out quick because Yknow The Recent Twitter News

[theforesteldritch]

I’m begging people at this point to realize that hate towards intersex people isn’t just. Fucking misdirected transphobia. Please for fucks sake learn that intersexism is a thing and that while transphobia and intersexism often go hand in hand and are used to reenforce the other, intersexism is not collateral damage from transphobia. They don’t just hate us because of a perceived proximity to transness, they hate us because we’re intersex. And will go about acting on this hate as such

#my post about Kansas’s anti trans and intersex bill is getting more notes again #and so many people just seem like this is just a byproduct of transphobia #so many people just. Dont seem to understand that we’re explicitly being targeted too #I shouldn’t have to spell out to people #That actually they want us to not exist too #intersex #intersexism

[egophiliac]

"IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A JOKE" As someone who's been playing TWST since march and stopped going out of my way to be spoilerfree after I got stuck at Overblott!Jamil? That's honestly been one of my favorite things about it - seeing something in fanart or a comment you think is just fans joking, only for it to be canon. "The economy!", "May I also throw a tantrum?", Malleus' gargoyle thing, and... everything about Rook being my top examples.

there's a whole bit in Trey's platinum birthday card where he goes on about how he became increasingly obsessed with mustard for like a week straight until the other students held an intervention. how are you supposed to talk about this. how can you bring up something like Trey's descent into mustard obsession to the point that the other characters are worried for him without it sounding like the most obvious lolrandom "he mentioned it once and now fandom acts like he puts mustard in everything" joke. also, how can I slip this into every Twst post from now on, because I need everyone in the world to know that this is a real canon fact about Trey "I'm just an average normal guy (who sticks my hands into people's mouths and owns 20 toothbrushes and used to eat flowers off the side of the road)" Clover.

for bonus points, 1) the punchline is that he still doesn't even like mustard that much, 2) he's saying all of this to Leona, and 3) Leona is actually kind of invested in Trey's mustard story for some reason, which is the most unbelievable part of all of this to be honest. (then Trey gets distracted by a painting of the Cheshire Cat and Leona takes the opportunity to powerwalk away to freedom before they can start talking about dijon versus spicy brown or whatever and extend this bit even longer)

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #platinum jacket birthday #sorry that this ended up as me just talking about trey's birthday story for...about as long as trey talked about mustard. whoops. #i have said it before and i'll say it again though #the birthday cards have the best and most insane lore and i love them #especially for trey. he wants us to believe he's just some ordinary dude SO bad but he also keeps saying shit like this. #although to be fair as soon as rook enters the building the weirdness bell curve gets immediately fubar'd #so i guess it's all relative #me any time the characters brush off the most whackadoodle bonkers nonsense: why are they not questioning...oh wait #this is a universe in which rook exists and is a real person that they know #never mind please continue

[wasyago]

something incredibly self indulgent

#i dont know???????????? #also the plot is a mess and doesn't make any sense and literally doesn't exist so don't ask me about it #i just wanted to draw human versions of caspian and gillion and then something weird happened... #jrwi riptide #jrwi fish and chips #just in case #and that's all im gonna tag for now #actually no #jrwi swordfish #>:) #they're dating #i think? i dont know. its complicated #again this thing is a giant mess i have no idea what's going on #uhhhhhhh #my art #sketch

[charpim]

[coughs]

#jevil #spamton #spamton g spamton #utdr #deltarune #just a test drawing of sorts cause i randomly remembered the b&w mode on mspaint existed #and i really wanted to use it again #caveman scrawlings

[p4nishers]

no but actually imagine being immortal and meeting THE LOVE OF UR FUCKING ENDLESS LIFE and spending SIX THOUSAND MFING YEARS imagining an ETERNAL future with them and fucking knowing that you want to spend ACTUAL FOREVER with them like dude im gonna fucking choke and die how can love like that exist even in fucking fiction?? HOW??? this is making me so emotional imagine someone wanting to spend actual fucking eternity with you i would die at the mere fucking possibility. "and we spend our EXISTENCE pretending that we aren't (...) and i would like to spend–" are u fucking kidding me rn man??? fuck off fuck u shut up

#i mean yeah theyre endless beings and time never meant much for them but ohhhhh myyy goddd dude this is insane #YHEY MET MILLIONS OF YEARS AGO THEN REMET AGAIN FOR THE FIRST TIME ANS FUCKING OH MY GOD THEY WANT TO SPEND THEIR EXISTENCE TOGETHER FUCK ME #i have very strong emotions about this someone hold my hand #i just read a fuck ass fic and now i cannot be normal #good omens #good omens s2 #azicrow #crowley #aziraphale #aziracrow #ineffable spouses

[turtleblogatlast]

It’s hard to escape self doubt

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt leo #rise leo #turtle art tag #once again reiterating that I keep forgetting color exists #anyway this was fun! very quick drawing so plz ignore mistakes 😭 #just wanted to mess around with colors and as always leo gets to be my muse #but yeah I like to think that Leo’s at his most real all alone #leo: I’m nothing without my brothers #also leo: *purposefully goes off on his own a lot* #I love him because by god does he contain a myriad of contradictions #he toes the line between selfish and selfless like it’s a dance

[xboxfox]

chell pony

#learning to draw for myself again or whatever #portal 2 #portal #chell #mlp;fim #mlp #my little pony #her cutiemark is a halo becuzs angel of aperture or whatever. i didnt want it to be something robot or science related bc she existed- #outside of aperture at Some Point so it didnt make that much sense and felt reductive yk #even tho the halo is still related it can be separate . perhaps she is just a good person

[courfee]

“Regulus would be proud of us,” James whispered quietly to no one in particular, still gripping onto the painting like a life raft. 

— Tender Curiosities, Baby!  @otrtbs

#ive thought about this scene for so long it just took me forever to draw cause once again the anatomy of cars is the bane of my existence #like originally i wanted evan and barty holding hands to be visible to have the contrast of sad lonely james and sad not lonely rosekiller #but alas cars wont allow it #ahb just still has my entire heart you dont get it #i have a none blurry rosekiller and a just james in front of blue with stars version of this but i think ill only put them on insta... #tender curiosities baby #art heist baby #james potter fanart #james potter #jegulus #rosekiller #rosekiller fanart #marauders #marauders fanart #evan rosier #barty crouch jr #jegulus fanart #jegulus fanfiction #fic: ahb #art heist baby! #mine #my art #hp #ahb #(sneaky end notes: i do have to admit i am not too pleased with evan and barty but this was my first time drawing them) #(so i couldnt figure it out quite yet hency why they look a little. less efforty...) #(also the snake ring is the same design that i drew for chapter 34 of ahb in my little chapter illustrations for my typeset) #((nvm i just checked back and i am fully lying here i used a different one for my typeset and now im vaguely upset oops) #(i shouldnt make decisions only half awake im going to think about this for too long now i am sad)) #((like suddenly i was like. hold up. i had a different design there didnt i... it was an open ring goddamnit))

[ccassettetape]

i am writing an accidental haiku to attract haiku bot

#haiku bot #🦾 finn txt #normal post. average. average words in these tags. #need to catch it. with a net maybe. like those ones that they always show ppl catching butterflies and junk with on shows. pspsppspspspspsp #ooooooooooh u wanna look at this post so bad oooooooooh #<- attempting to attract haiku bot to this post #wowoowoooowowowowowoowowowowowowoowowowoowowowoowowiwoowiwiwoowowowowoowowwwww (<- normal noises) #I wonder if there’s a limit to how many tags you can add #time to begin the haiku bot summoning ritual um #oooowowowowoowowowwwwooooo haiku bot haiku bot haiku bot oooowoowowowowwwwwwwu you wanna look at this post haiku bot ooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuoo #throws flower. get over here please. #man. my arm hurts. #its weird bc one #why does my arm hurt thats really donking random but two im not?? why do i have an arm. i still get kinda surprised by it when i front lmao #why am i rambling so much in the tags #oh right trying to figure out if theres a limit to how many tags there can be dhdjdjndhdjsjmsjdjd #i think lesbians are cool. girls who like other girls are awesome. keep existing 👍 #uhhhhhhhh #never mind im done with that now i dont anything more to say :( #never mind again #tags tags tags tags tags #LISTEN IM BORED AS HECK AND WANT TO DO SOMETHING RANDOM AND SILLY SHUSH #journal

[fucklife101]

I feel so unbelievably alone.

#mentally exhausted #i dont want to be here #tw depressing stuff #im losing hope #i hate myself #i want to die #i’m so alone #self h@rm #i hate my existence #mental health relapse #anxi4ty #deppresing quotes #deppresing thoughts #depressing shit #i relapsed again #i want to disappear #tired of life #no one cares #i hate me lol #i hate my body

[beatriceportinari]

Origami jellyfish, one square sheet of elephant hide paper. Colors are inspired by Thysanostoma loriferum. Zoom in to see the glitter!

#mine #origami #jellyfish #that was what the hexagons were for did you guess ? :) #original model is by Beth Johnson and only the bell/umbrella is in one single sheet (hexagonal) #the tentacles are all added separately #I wanted to see if I could do it all with one sheet of paper so I used the exact same hexagon CP for the bell and simply placed it #at the center of a bigger square of paper #pretty glad of how it came out #tentacles would need some cleanup if I ever fold this again and I could workshop a frillier edge for the bell as well #still really nice this is the most elaborate modification of an existing model I've made #if you want to see the original model it's in origami aquarium by Makoto Yamaguchi p.200 #it looks so cute... teensy jelly #I used elephant hide paper (my enemy) to use up this roll i've had #i thought it'd at least be nice to collapse the hexagon tessellation which it was but that's really the only nice part asdfgh #if I fold this again I'll use smth thinner so the tentacles aren't as bulky #and to hell with the cleanliness of the hexagons #honestly the paper tension works in your favor for thoses #they get tightened when you round out the umbrella instead of flattened out as I feared #so the elephant hide really isn't needed... as usual! #anyway enjoy :3