#i wanna be more productive but all ive done is sleep. so much

[delicourse]

fall but blue

#jolyne cujoh #jojo's bizarre adventure #stone ocean #jjba #deliart #a simpler palette i think. i like it a lot actually #ALSO was gonna try to post this version inbetween other artworks but im posting it now so it dont look like i posted once an #d immediately bailed. gone for months #im just still in color palette adjustment purgatory #but new artwork will have a bird yayyy #i wanna be more productive but all ive done is sleep. so much #im gonna have to literally Seek Help. i swear if its vitamin deficiency im gonna be embarrassedddd #like oohhhhh im one centimeter closer to the polar circle i cant get enough vit d anymoreeee oghhhh my body is decayingg. Cringe!

[old-poptart]

Bestie I’m back-

And I’m writing this request as I’m about to fall asleep Fr

But can I have an Amane x reader oneshot with his girlfriend who’s been overworking herself?? Like Amane and her are living in an apartment together and she has been getting little to no sleep due to her job. One day Amane comes home to her fallen asleep at her work table. When Amane finally takes her to the bed, she’s half asleep whispering how much she adores him (she’s half asleep so she’s just spitting all this out with no regrets and filter- I act like a drunk when I’m half asleep-)

I HAD THIS IDEA AND HAD TO REQUEST IT FROM SOMEONE

Thank youuu!!!

a/n: RAHHHH I LOVE ONE SHOTS AND THIS IDEA ITS SO STINKIN CUTEEEEE, ofc you can request from me darlin muah 😽

warnings: fluff so sweet you'll have to pay the dentist a visit, mentions of lack of sleep, over working yourself

Amane with his overworked s/o (female) 🩹:

"rest in my arms, my pretty girl.. ive got ya"

drops splashed on your window, the wind tousling the trees' leaves, what a day today. you barely had any time to spend with your choppy haired boy, amane, the love of your life. you've been known to be a pretty hard worker, you've been commemorated and praised for that. that praise filled something inside of you like it was what kept ya goin'. if you didn't seek validation and a good product, what's the point, right?

"alright, just gotta do these assignme..nts!! then gotta do that thingy and.." those words kept breaking apart everytime your unfiltered voice spoke, lack of sleep was taking an affect to a lot of things but hey! at least you're getting your job done, right? your head wanted to rest itself on that rock hard desk but you resisted. eventually your tiredness said otherwise and made it collapse onto the surface, a sigh escaping your lips.

"sweetheart..?" oh the sweet sound of love rang in your ears, amane always had a way with his words and that carried into the names he gave you. he'd call you all sorts of stuff, my pretty baby, pumpkin, sugar, cutie pie, anything that was as sweet as you was the perfect name for his love. he walked in your workspace, seeing how he was in his pajamas already and was clearly waiting for that snuggle session you promised him earlier.

"hmm..? oh amane, my loveee..!" you picked your head up so that you could look at him properly, a smile tugging onto the corners of your lips and your eyes sleepily but lovingly gazing at him. you couldn't see it that well, but a blush rose to his pale cheeks.

"darling, you need to sleep! it's past midnight.." your boyfriend begged you as he poked your cheek, it just made your drunk like self to be even more lovey dovey. you just loved him so much, what would you do without that angel who also happens to be a hunk of junk~?

"awh but i wanna be with youuuu!! you're just so perfect, i love ya so muchhh" your words were slurred as if you were on your fifth shot of tequila, no words that came out of your blabbering mouth were thought over and it honestly made amane chuckle despite how flushed he was.

an idea sparked in his head, he can take advantage of your sleepy mindset. "you did promise me that cuddle session earlier, you can make it up to me now~" he grinned as he held your hand in his, ready to lead you to bed. "oh yes pleaseee" your half lidded eyes wandered into his gentle but teasing honey glazed eyes. you got up, but you both soon realized you might be too sleepy to even walk to bed!

"alrighty then, 'guess we'll have to do this another way..~" he wrapped his arms around your body, picking you up bridal style and walking you over to bed. you were so sleepy you didn't even get flushed at this adorable action, instead you fawned over how princely he was and how he meant the world to you, how sweet~

his cheeks getting warmer, amane placed you in bed gently as he tucked you in. he also got all cozy with you too, i mean you two are like two puzzle pieces that fit perfectly for each other. your head used his arm as a pillow as the other caged you tightly so you wouldn't leave, it was all you wanted. "you're so sweet.. my prince charming..~" your voice couldn't help but sleepily whisper sweet nothings into his ear as you fell asleep, man he felt like the happiest man alive. what would he do without his pretty girl?

GAHHHHH ROLLIN IN BED RN- HOPE YOU ENJOY!

-ooga :D

#tbhk x reader #hanako #hanako x reader #amane yugi

[mayssa-m]

I have a string feeling this summer is gonna be the one usually previous summers ik even if i have no plans plannified, summer is still gonna turn out really good as i dont study, reunite w my family(especially my cousins) sleep over at their house they sleep over ours, sleep late, wake up late, go to the beach, the sun, getting tanned, losing weight, n its all good vibes especially at night its really animated at night n its really positive vibes out there its jus life, but this one in particular, i will not feel like i have to study but im not doing it, this one im done with my 2 years journey n im passing my exams this may-june, n ill forget n start a new beginning on september, so i wouldnt have to study for sht as its a fresh new start, im getting my first laptop (the old ones are really old n i gave up on them this would be a sofisticated one n id feel up to date with something modern), im starting my journey, i would work out 5 days a week, swim, idk about sleeping early as its nearly unbelievable to do especially that my family is over, id jus feel mentally overall free tbh, focus on building my career for 2 months straight, i would probably also have a new room w my sister so id feel better environment wise, n i would carry my laptop almost everywhere i go, for the sake of motivation n variation in my environment i would work 70% of the time away from home n home would be my confort zone, but just to not feel overwhelmed, stressed n “i hate myself so much” i would workout, shower (away from home), n then walk or by car go to a public place such as a cafe, mall, library,… in order to be away from home n still got this motivation, work for like 2 hours n get back home n do something different such as practicing guitar n i would really love to spend more time w people (which is something i automatically do a lot during summer as i dont got school n feel overall more confident of myself n open to people) so this time this feeling would be more, when i say that id be my cousins, mom, dad, grandparents, i would also like to go out w people from my school which i really dont talk to that much n be as human as possible with them n thats really it

•so id do all the productive sht i would need to get done when im by my own in the beginning of the day, with that being said id have to wake up early, n then for the rest of the day my time would be more flexible n i can do more enjoyable stuff for example hanging out with people once my everyday work was done earlier in the day

N thats really it

I wanna get back to this the last day of my exam

•get a laptop

•being satisfied with the way ive done my exams

•(optional: having material)

•not gave up on working out

[rawrmeansilyindinosawr]

i DRANK 2 PUMPKIN SPICE LAtTez N NOW I FEEL Leafes in my Stom@ch!!!!!!

RAWR MEANS ILY IN DINOSAWR N I WANNA CUM to dA DARK SIZE CUZ THEYZ GOTS Mint CHOCO CHIP COOKIEZ !!!!!!

5 MORE DAYZ THEN I KAN POST ON LEX N FUG WHO EVER REPORTED MY LAST POST CUZ I RLY DID GET LIKE 17 MSGS IN RESPONSE TO MY “pOTENTIALLY HARMFHL” AKA RAISING AWARENESS MAYB BY “INCITING VIOLENCE “ON A Bitch AT HENRIETTA HUDSON!!!!!

Y do u keep smoking weed from a dirty bong when u hav bronchitis??? Y do some ppl accept 5-7 min sex from their partners and still decide to Stay with them ??? Y do u keep growing out ur roots to plz ur boyfie who has worked at michilen star restaurantz but i hav only witnessed cookin pasghetti??? shoutout to the tht guy w the bike who jumped out wilson L at 4am just to tell meh he thought i was cute n asked for mi number but i said NO!!!!!!! n r@n away. shutout to mi fwendz taiwanese landlady who pet me lik a dog n who i put k up her nose in trade 4 hot soy milky n a fish bao. they hav a fb pg dedicated to they pet ferret who dressez up like oprah, marilyn monroe n bob marley <dreads from her old boyfie!> shoutout 2 da bday pawrty tht i threw tht didn’t happen tht led to a mental breakdown n bday boy split on meh but itz all luv at the end of the day.

havnt blogged in a min since i started werking as a teacher n also at jewelry warehouse managing inventory n packaging . ig it’s whut U culd call product merchandising? finished mi fashion merchandising certificate via parsons n hav been accomplishing much but Rly kinda Fucked at the same time cuz Cali taxes but i think in ab 3 yrs w more frugal spending n living w debt i will probz be able to C the lite of day but fornow i hav got to keep gettin Kuter n hotter so i get my drugs for free.

Whts happened since i last bloggeD??? Well… the bar i threw my bday party at in Sep wants $600 from me and i lost my id there as collateral , i put K up my butthole for the first time tht same nite , My therapist i just got last week thinks i hv a great sense of humor , i paid $100 for an LA Astrologer to read my natal chart ill get read nxt sunday ,hav been reading a lot of peoples fb messages in their account unbeknownst to Dem [ some ppl r Toxic!! ] , Went 2 sleepy halloww N it wuz fun to explor3 ! we snuck into the phillip manor n ran from the moosez n snuck into the cemetery then went back to the city to go two parties til our phone died N we were askin ppl for directions to the nxt party. 0pen bar at ladygunn [ N met ppl from sk8 kitchen ive now met like three ppl from sk8 kitchen just in passing in parties n walkin around in bushwick. ] walkin in platformz n cheap shein shoes we blistered n bruised so the bunions unfortunately rnt goin anywhere but it iz whut it iz.

A haiku:

Mi molly plug

put they

pube

in my molly pills.

10/10 Best molly i ever done. missed the party bus at fidi to haunted mansion cuz my fake frog died n im in the third stage of grief ab it. (Bargaining) . Im entering a hoe phase again after being in my “im waiting for tru luv christian era “but like Truly- if ur boring id rather u be toxic pleaze for the love of God don’t b boring !!!!!!!!! UgH…. now I know whut silicone fake boobs feel like in my handz and mouth , iAm now an owner of a mattress made out of green tea , Im talking to a they them whose name is a frappuccino at Starbucks , My belly button piercing is infected , N new luv language unlocked : L8 nites screaming 2 emo music n throwback y2K sheit in Lena hornes grandsons bushwick apt n kissing his gf n trying on wigz n trying to do headstandz n LOTZ OF poetry SHaringz !!

a random poem i wrote on the bussy On my way! to werk: “scared of fame like sia .

Rico Nasty , sick . and diarrheaed .” Do u like it .

Halloweenn wuz fun dressing up like the BL00d of christ lmfao but i def got too tired cuz went out consecutive dayz n no sleep n just tired n sad . Intrapersonal probz make meh so fukin sad. But it lastz few wkz of good wetherr so i celebratin by goin to bodega in a c thru bra. i value deli man’s opinions of meh Titty piercings . iM still confused as to how i met my last situationship’s ex roommate at a casting who also may hav fucked my friends situation ship / Boyfie while feeling insecure and Hmmz. Guess the strait scene is gettin smol like the gay scene.

i finished watching party monster ab the club kidz scene in nyc n i am fuckin INSPIRED as hell to keep dressin weird n mayb do drag makeup sometimez. Luved the movie but therez too much Heroin. but much respect to Amanda Lenore , James st James n Angel Melendez (rip). Sidenote but i’ve been talking to a virgo trans masc columbia student who wants to top me and He wuz tellin meh ab how they did heroin once at a poland rave n Im getting increasingly interested Also just found out kurt cobain did Hereoin to help his undiagnosed IBS prob cuz he was severely lactose but his fav food wuz mac n cheese n pizza. LE SIGGHHH. soooooo relatable…!!!! but H is not kute so ima hav to let this 1 pass.

Finally getting mf help n treatment for ED stuff n tryna take more vitamins , im afraid of change and its so toxic how my head kan get sometimes just trying to follow this routine or diet sometimes i’ll call it just to find myself lying to myself continuously n going in roundabout ways with food anxiety, to the point of not being able to sleep because im in such a bad headspace because i’m hungry and trying to distract myself from not eating. I rly want a cinnamon roll wiff pecans tho. n crab Ranboobs…..

Gossip gurl rennybaby69247 advice- Dunt ever trust a hoe tht acts like sylvia plath manic girlie but kantt rly relate cuz it’s a whole systemic white ppl privilege thing at the end of the day , but trust white ppl who bake real good cuz Tbh they cook the main course w no garlic seasoning or pepper or salt on PURPOSE cuz they wanna prepare u for the boobwerrie muffin w almondz shaped like heartz on the top Dessert on purpose cuz U wont even fathom their artistry n Sheit n the power in their muscles to knead that dough tO Begin with!!!!!!!!!! white people need more credibility in the kitchen Ntthis week i want to say white lives matter n we shuld Giv them respectable chances to "get back " in our social platforms .

Til nxt week!!!!!!!!

ur disney channel princess , clowncore magazine collaging naked neighbor in the window , Depressed bitch rotting in their bedroom, Blew up on tiktok cuz of the ketamine scene in russian doll Yea u shuld follow me , Renny<3

#blog

[invisiblerxch]

hello. Today I gave an entrance exam for a backup (college) plan. It was my first time giving a competitive exam and it went horrible ( atleast in my head)

Reasons for why it went bad? Well there are plenty.

With the change in education system due to pandemic, everything is fast paced and completely new. I think I realize what it's like to be an adult. Not long ago I used to called myself a child but I think I need to grow up and keep up with the world now. Admittedly the main reasons for why I did bad in the exam is solely my fault. I rushed it, wasn't aware, lazy, all over the place, didn't keep with entrance exams date or the syllabus and didnt prepared for it earlier.... i could have, I should have but i did not.

Not long I didn't even wanna apply for the exams for colleges due to being tired with continously giving exams (only few weeks before I had given my last high school main exams that was a month long process)

I didn't manage my time well, I didn't take it seriously. Thinking I'll hop in the last days and you know some how make it.

That's a lie actually. These exams aren't easy.

I keep thinking about my situation.

What makes me so entitled to even think that the universe would pick me and make me smooth sail all my problems? How pathetic.

Looking at all the other peers who are giving there best for months long, have devoted time in practicing and being productive. They are better. And there is no denying.

I was foolish. And Im sad. I didn't knew that I was delusioned to the point I forgot where I stood.

I stand nowhere.

My reality is that I'm not working for my future. And that I've been ignorant for it a long time. I see other kids all aware, excited and always striking ahead in opportunities.

And what have I done ? I've been giving excuses of depression and being stuck at one point. Im simply not excited for life anymore. I fantasy about the American dream in my head uk the girl boss being rich and sh*t. But in all truth I've been having hard time grasping my life conditions. I'm aware of lot of stuff about myself. I know I'm not eating well (or at all) sleeping too much, using social media to distract myself.

I fee like my mind has degraded and my body doesn't responds to me anymore.

I've seen people moving forward. I've seen everyone I knew moving forward to the point I'm not even surprised.

A lot of things are making me bitter. I'm not smart, don't consider myself pleasing, have identity crisis and have anxiety.

I try to feel jolly good for the people around me for their friendships, hobbies, relationships, simply for how they live.

Idk why I keep them all in a pedestal but deep down I really hate seeing people being happy. Not because I want something worse for them. It's just I'm jealous because i feel that certain happiness can't be mine.

Pandemic shut me off completely. I thought I was healing and all but all I've been doing is being caved in a room. The moment I thought I was coming out of my shell the stress of multiple exams hit me. And I couldn't take it, made excuses to get lost in my dreamland and wasted time. Now I suffer.

Maybe it's me being over dramatic ( ik I am) but I learned that time really doesn't give a shit about ya. Lmao

And as I keep ranting, the more I write the more I really wanna punch myself. I sound like a crybaby.

But anyways as I come to conclusion of whatever I wrote. I think at the end I still want to pat myself in the back.

Again I did horrible in my exam and got another main one coming. I dont wanna start with extra positivity and "you'll be fine/okay" bullshit. Those words seem vague idk why...

I just want to try. I really wanna try. The entrances are country wide and is hella competitive. One side of me thinks that absolutely in no way "i" would make it. But another part of me just really wanna give my best shot.

It's just I don't know how.

How do people accomplish themselves? Ive always wondered that... maybe its time for me to adapt and learn as well.

Anyways just a rant. I kept thinking about how horrible I gave my exam today and thought by distracting I would get over it. I couldn't. I just wanted to acknowledge it.

But I got no friends who would listen to me talk this long hahah... I guess I just wanted to speak it out loud.

Universe if you listening. Pls just give me strength to believe in myself once again.

#examstress #rant #howcanthisreachouttootherpeoplesoicanfindfriends #examcoping

[wollfling]

.

#me: i dont have seasonalaffectivedisorder i love winter actually i hate summer #me: has spent every day this week crying over stupid shit #how are you all coping. usually i am okay. and i work best at night time so i always feel a little productive in winter #but its so so bad this time around. that or im just worse in general that could be q thing. #confession is i havent gotten out of bed all day. i took my dog outside thats all ive done. #i keep trying to draw but i just like CANT and its making me cry more. i am really overwhelmed. #i keep thinking oh maybe ill try reading (has been unable to get the stupid book thats just on the otber side of the room) #its so fucking ridiculous. i havent even been on my phone thst much and i havent been sleeping ive just been dissociating i guess? #other than my attempts to draw and play ac but my switch died lol. whatever #i honestly have no idea what ive been doing this entire time. #im gonna take melatonin and go to bed early or something i guess #desperately i wwnt to draw and being unable to is hurting like actually. tgis is so dumb. #and like every attempt I've made and started to be successful somebody has got to bother me and fuck it up #or give me news i dont wanna hear. dump stuff on me. etc. literally so exhausted. always and constantly

[rivetwrites]

DRV3 Cuddling HC

//this was mostly for me, i really need a comfort, so im gonna do all of the characters. very long post BHABHA

i might do the other games as well (even characters ive done before since i wanna rewrite them) 

- mod oma

EDIT: I FORGOT MIU AND TSUMUGI IM SORRY

----------------------

Shuichi Saihara

Very shy about cuddling, but he absolutely loves it

The feeling of your body pressed up against his, your breath on his neck just makes him melt inside

He adores spooning you, though he gets a bit shy when he’s the little spoon

He loves being held by you, sometimes resting his head on your chest as you pet his hair

It relieves so much stress for him, and he’s a pretty stressed out guy

He doesn’t have a favourite position, as long as he close to you

But if he had to choose, he loves spooning

Either way, he loves feeling protected and protecting you

Kaede Akamatsu

She loves cuddles!

She’s not shy about it at all, pulling you close to her when you two are sitting together

She lets you rest your head on her thighs as she runs her fingers through your hair

Though if you want to bring her to your chest, she wouldn’t complain

She’ll always have a big smile on her face as she nuzzles your skin

Her favourite position is having you rest your head on her chest

She loves playing with your hair and comforting you, so that’s the best position to do so!

Kaito Momota

BIG CUDDLE GUY

He loves the feeling of protecting you, so he’ll curl around you, regardless on how tall you are

Though don’t expect to sleep if it’s not bedtime, he can talk for hours

Though, he would love to have your head on his chest as well while he rubs your back

Even if you fall asleep on him, he wouldn’t even notice and continue talking

But when he does, he makes sure you’re extra comfortable as he presses a kiss to your forehead

Maki Harukawa

Almost never cuddles you, but will when you ask

She prefers to be the big spoon, or having you in her arms, but won’t object if you want to hold her

Kind of stiff and awkward, not really knowing where to put her hands

The more time that goes on, she relaxes a bit more, even starting to get a bit sleepy

She doesn’t have a favourite position, as she’s neutral for all of them

But spooning does get her fairly sleepy and snuggly

Kokichi Oma

Little shit can never sit still enough to actually cuddle

He’s always on the move, so you’d either have to wait until its bedtime, or catch him

Once you do, he’s very squirmy and he loves to nuzzle into your chest

He hates to admit it, but he loves being the little spoon. He feels so small and protected and he adores it

If you have boobs, beware, he’ll be nuzzling them the entire time

But if not, he’ll still be nuzzling them, but not suffocating as much

He falls asleep pretty easily if it’s quiet (he’s never quiet) and actually calms down

Before he’s up again and playfully wrestling you

Himiko Yumeno

As soon as you wrap your arms around her, she’s out like a light

She can never stay awake long enough to actually cuddle you, so you’d probably have to snuggle her

But the rare moments she is, she loves laying on top of you, using your chest as her pillow

Says something about recharging her mana, but she’s just sleepy and she loves you

You wouldn’t have to worry about waking her up if you move, she’s a heavy sleeper

Tenko Chabashira

PROTECTIVE.

She will absolutely be your big spoon, or having you rest on her chest

She would be kind of stiff, but she’s mostly on alert in case someone decided to jump the both of you

You’d have to reassure her that you’ll both be fine and to relax

She’s still on alert, but she would relax against you as she compliments you

She loves running her hands on your back, almost like a massage

If someone even decided to sneak up on the both of you, she’ll kick their ass

Rantaro Amami

He adores cuddles

His love language is touch, so cuddles are pretty often with you

He prefers being the big spoon, or having his arm wrapped around you, but won’t protest if you want to change it up a bit

He loves running his hands up and down your sides, his mind taking note on all of your soft curves

He gets pretty sleepy, so you’d probably be trapped while he naps

But never fear! He’ll stay up to talk about your day, or his adventures!

Cuddle time is his absolute favourite time

Korekiyo Shinguji

He takes cuddle time pretty seriously

It’s the one time of day when he’s able to look over at how beautiful your body is

Nothing sexual, just to see how gorgeous you actually are

He prefers to have his arm wrapped around you, but he also likes to have you rest on his chest as well

He’s a pretty tall guy, so his long limbs will tangle with yours throughout the night

He doesn’t fall asleep easily, so he would talk about history, or about traditions he learned more about that day

Angie Yonaga

Very snuggly! Though its hard to get her away from her worship to cuddle

But once she’s in bed with you, her face will be snuggled into your chest with her arms around your waist

She doesn’t get sleepy easily, so she would have a nice chat, even dropping the conversation on Atua and just asking how your day was

She gets pretty calm and cuddling allows her to empty her head

Sometimes she’ll even meditate while snuggling, which she’s pretty good at

But after awhile, she’ll get pretty antsy and will leave to do something else (with you in her hand of course!)

Kiibo

Not very comfortable, but he tries!

The best would probably be cuddling on the couch with his head in your lap

Though, all that metal is sort of heavy

He feels sort of sad since he can’t cuddle your properly

But never fear!! You two can hold hands!

It makes him feel a lot better, especially when you’re laying together and your fingers are laced with his

Sometimes the two of you can get in a comfortable enough position to actually cuddle, which would be your head on his arm

Kirumi Tojo

Sort of dislikes cuddling, but not because she hates touching, she just hates the feeling of not being productive

So the best time to cuddle would be when she’s ready for bed!

She would love any position, so she had no preferences

If you want her to lay on your chest, she will

If you want to lay on hers, got it! She’ll be running her fingers through your hair

You’d have to stop her from giving you a proper massage though, in which she’ll actually have to relax

She definitely deserves a break

Gonta Gokuhara

Absolute SOFTIE

He’s so gentle and caring with you, making sure you’re absolutely comfortable

Big spoon all the way, but wouldn’t mind being the little spoon (big little spoon?)

He would love to have you lay on top of him, in which he’ll wrap his arms around your waist and press small kisses to your cheeks

Kind of afraid that he might hurt you (he never ever does) so he’ll be sort of hesitant

But when you reassure him that you’ll be okay, he’ll have that big cute smile on his face as he peppers your face in smooches

Ryoma Hoshi

He never complains if you want to cuddle

Sort of embarrassed that he’s the little spoon

But he loves it a bunch

He adores feeling your body pressed up against his as your arms wrap around his waist

Sometimes he’ll rest his head on your chest, nuzzling slightly as he slowly falls asleep

Comfort this boy, he’s so tired

Tsumugi Shirogane

This tall woman can CUDDLE

She loves cuddling! Sometimes she’ll pull you into her lap and wrap her arms around you to snuggle

She’s so soft and gentle with you, almost like you’re made of glass

She prefers big spoon, but would love if she was little spoon as well!

Loves to talk about anime and manga, even if you’re about to sleep

Sometimes she won’t talk for awhile, but she’s just off in her own head

Miu Iruma

Lord.

Pray she doesn’t suffocate you in her titties

A little awkward to cuddle, as it’s usually a sign of...more

But when you just want to cuddle, she won’t complain

She’ll go on about her inventions, what she wants to do, what happened that day, who pissed her off, etc

She loves being little spoon, on hand on her waist and another one on her boob

She falls asleep pretty fast, and she moves around a lot.

#mod oma #long post #danganronpa #danganronpa x reader #get ready for tags #drv3 #killing harmony #shuichi saihara #shuichi x reader #kaede akamatsu #kaede x reader #kaito momota #kaito x reader #maki haruwaka #maki x reader #kokichi oma #kokichi x reader #rantaro amami #rantaro x reader #angie yonaga #angie x reader #korekiyo shinguji #korekiyo x reader #ryoma hoshi #ryoma x reader #gonta gokuhara #gonta x reader #kirumi tojo #kirumi x reader #kiibo

[timothy-chamlet]

the afterparty - t.c. fanfic

pair: timmy x female reader

warnings: unprotected sex, general smut

word count: 2.6k (2640)

a//n: ok er ive never written for timmy before so im nervous snsvsj but if you read it tell me what u think !! <3

°•○●○•°

people often thought the two of you were dating. paparazzi tended to make it look that way through press. despite all the candid photos of you and timothée plastered in magazine spreads and floating around on blogs, he would tell people you weren't together. interviewers would ask, and time again he would put an end to the rumor by saying you weren't dating, you were just friends. 

to be fair, you honestly couldn't even be mad at him. it was a good marketing tactic, at least. if all the girls knew he was single they'd still be invested in the persona of a young, attractive starlet that - despite his more than desirable qualities - is still single. genius. meanwhile you were being his best friend and his trophy for award shows. 

it was growing on you though. you enjoyed walking red carpet events and going to extravagant parties and meeting big names in the industry. it was really a win-win for both of you. 

another one of those win-win situations was tonight. the past three days had been crazy. hair appointments, nail appointments, dress fittings, photoshoots, brunches, and dinners. running each new day on an hour of sleep - maybe two if you were lucky. fueled by energy drinks and the promise of rest after the event. showing up to an awards ceremony on nothing more than a 20 minute nap and a double shot espresso. being timothée's showpiece was exhausting. but it was good for you. 

you had just finished your last consultation for dress fittings and were on your way to your styling appointment. the dress would arrive shortly after you so everything was ready to go. things were set for timothée to meet you there in an hour or so, after his own styling. 

currently you're getting your makeup done. a swarm of professionals all around you, handing products, giving directions, telling you how gorgeous you look, at least three hands on you at all times. after almost an hour all the disembodied hands move from your face to reveal the *almost* finished product. you still need your hair done, but your face was flawless. your skin was insanely smooth; not a pore in sight, your lids were a bronze shade, and your lips were a perfect nude. 

a hair stylist soon steps into view, also admiring your makeup before diving into your hair. it was simple. a slicked back ponytail is all, careful not to draw away from your face and your dress. 

the strong aroma of hairspray clouds you as you maneuver to step into your dress. stripped of your previous clothes, you step into your dress and a couple people help you pull it up. the woman attending to the supper in the back steps away for a moment, seeming to answer a question. 

"what's his name?" she asks into her ear piece. "uh yes. she's in here with me. send him in."  

she returns behind you and does up the zipper to your dress. to your surprise, you see timothée waltz in the room. dressed in a charcoal gray suit with a light lavender button up underneath. "y/n," he exhales, walking towards you. "you look breathtaking, ma chérie." 

"you don't look too bad yourself, timmy," you say, stepping down from your pedestal to be almost eye level with him.

"is she done here?" he asks everyone around without taking his eyes off you. 

one of the women there swoops in with a pair of shoes and says, "slip in to these and you're ready to go, darling." 

you step into your shoes and link arms with timothée. "carriage awaits," he says as the two of you get escorted to the limo. 

once inside you let out a deep breath you didn't know you were holding. "you okay?" he asks from beside you. 

"yeah, just.. tired." 

he chuckles and drops his head. "absolutely exhausted." you two had similarly scheduled days so he knows exactly how you feel. "don't worry, mon amour, i'll have you home in about 8 hours." 

"i thought the awards show was only 4-" 

"there's always the afterparty.." 

you audibly groan and drop your head as timothée places a reassuring hand on your knee. 

"we're here," he says with fake enthusiasm as the limo pulls up to the event. the past 45 minutes felt like hours as your head began to pound from the lack of sleep. yet, lucky you, 45 minutes in l.a. traffic was a miracle. 

the two of you step out into the scene. flashing lights from camera flickers, the general buzz of the crowd, people you knew trying to get your attention, people timothée knew trying to get his attention. being the kind person he is, he doesn't shy away from fans calling his name. he walks over to give high fives, say hi, sign things, and really interact with the people that are so invested in his career. you look at him with a fond smile on your face as he greets  people.  

"timothéeeee," you both hear and turn around to match the loud booming voice to a face. 

"armieee!!" he yells in response, hurrying over to hug his co-star. 

you stand idly by as the two hug and catch up. fiddling with your ponytail and the skirt of your dress. until that same voice catches your attention. 

"bring it in hot stuff!" 

"hey, armie! how've you been, handsome?" you two had only met a handful of times, but it's like your souls clicked instantly. he had kept in touch since the first time you met and you guys had been pretty close ever since. 

"oh i’m doing great. really. just excited for this evening. can't wait to see how many awards lil' tim brings in," armie ends with a light laugh before timothée chimes in. 

"oh god no-" 

a cheery voice interrupts the conversation. 

"helloooo," armie's wife says in a sing-song voice and joins his side. "nice to see you again, y/n. and congrats timmy on your nominations." 

you and timothée nod in response and utter small, nervous 'thank you's' before armie excuses the two of them, promising to catch up later. 

"well, well, well- this is it, timmy." you say from your seat next to him. the host reads the nominees for best breakthrough of the year, and timothée's name is mixed in with so many other talented actors. he nervously puts his hand over yours. "you are absolutely amazing. everyone knows that. you're gonna get it." he looks at you and you pass him a reassuring smile. 

"and the award for best breakthrough goes to… timothée chalamet!" 

his head shoots up in shock. cameras pan around him and his baffled expression appears on huge screens behind the stage. he slowly stands from his seat and makes his way to the stage. making a beautiful speech, thanking almost everyone he's ever known. giving gratitude to everyone he's ever worked with, his parents, and his best friends. he comes off the stage and returns to his seat beside you. a year runs down his cheek, and you move to wipe it away, but he grabs your hand away from his cheek only to press his lips to your knuckles. "thank you for always believing in me." 

"you're an amazing actor and an even better friend. 

the night was nearing an end. people were saying their goodbyes and their 'see-you-soon's and going their separate ways. you and timothée walk out of the event, arms linked, with his hands tightly gripping his award. the smile never leaves his face. "i can't fucking believe that, y/n."

"you did it, timmy! all you and your hard work. lemme pick a nice spot on your shelf for it yeah?" 

"i was thinking about sitting it on my dresser right above the drawer full of your shit you keep leaving at my house," he says with a barely visible smirk. 

"oh, well if it's such a problem," you begin "i guess I'll just have to come get my 'shit' then?" you finish sarcastically. 

"oh! how dare you?" he begins to shout, going on a tirade similar to that of hamlet; overly dramatic and mostly nonsensical. "leave them be! small, small remnants; reminders of thee." he trails off softly, dropping his head to your shoulder and bringing his other hand up to trail his fingertips down the side of your face. 

you can't help but chuckle at this. "bravo timothée! amazing performance." 

he straightens up before taking a bow and returning to his previous position on your shoulder. "do you wanna skip the afterparty?" 

"and do what, tim? i thought you were gonna catch up with armie?" 

"i dunno- go to my place?" 

you nod your head, and timothée let's the driver know to just go to his house. 

you get out of the car in front of his apartment, quickly thank the driver, and dash inside; excited to remove the day. "can i shower?" you ask quickly already making your way upstairs.

"oui, mon trèsor, make yourself at home. ill be up in a while." it was almost as if he had it scripted. a routine more or less. you'd ask to shower - despite him telling you almost each time you never had to ask - and go up stairs to do so; him trailing along about an hour later behind you. 

you finish your shower earlier than planned so you decide to lay on his bed until he comes up. you let your freshly washed body relish in the textures of the cotton t-shirt and shorts you're wearing and the damp-cool feel of the comforter on his bed. 

you're not left alone for long before he darts up the stairs and into his room, catching your attention. you watch as he walks around, dropping various articles of his clothing haphazardly on his floor. left in only his boxers. 

"timmy?" you ask in a drawn out voice. 

"hm?" he asks lowly in response; his eyes trained on you. you don't respond to his muffled question and instead watch as he comes to lean over the foot of the bed, by your legs. "i've been thinking," he continues, "a lot recently. about us.." 

"us?-" 

"about what the media thinks we are. what the people say. the blog posts, the tweets. i read it all… what do you think about it, y/n?" he ends with a light sigh, making drawing light swirls on your leg. 

"i dunno really. i've never thought much about it," you say sitting up. 

he moves up from his place in front of the bed, crawling up to sit to the right of your legs. knees drawn up to his chest, eyes meeting yours. he raises his hand so his fingertips ghost the curve of your cheek. "you never think about.. the possibility of us?" he pauses as his eyes drift from yours. hands falling to his lap as he scoots even closer to you. you sit stunned, not knowing how to answer as if it was some rhetoric instead of a simple question. filling the silence, he continues. "i think about how different things would be if we were together. what it would be like to hold you and kiss you and- can i kiss you?" 

his voice wavers as his eyes meet yours yet again. with quick movements, he moves to straddle your legs, both hands resting lightly on either side of your face. 

"can i kiss you?" he asks again, his face millimeters from yours. 

you shake your head yes as your eyes fluttering closed, your lips brushing against his as you move. 

he plants his lips firmly on yours. innocent at first, but the kiss quickly gets deeper. more desperate, his hands moving from the sides of your face to tangle in your hair, pulling your head back giving him access to your neck. his lips dance around the skin of your neck, being careful not to leave any marks. “is this okay?” he whispers, dragging his hands from your hair to the hem of your shirt. 

you nod your head vigorously and he pulls your shirt up and over your head, throwing it to the floor with his clothes. you lean back and give timothee free reign of your chest and stomach. he makes his way from your neck down and across your chest. your hands rush to knot in his hair as he takes a nipple in his mouth, carefully flicking his tongue across the hardening bud before doing the same to the other. 

"timmy.." you breathe out as he leaves your chest and explores lower. his eyes meet yours as his teeth come into contact with the flimsy waistband of your sleep shorts. "please," you whisper. 

he hooks his fingers into the waistband of your shorts and pulls them down your legs; eyes going wide when he sees you have nothing underneath. 

"so pretty," he whispers almost to himself as he throws your shorts in his floor with the rest of your guys' clothes. he runs his finger along your slit, collecting some of your wetness, tasting it. laying back down with your legs over his shoulders, he hooks his arms around your thighs to keep you in place. he runs his tongue along your folds and you arch your back in response. he sucks on your clit making you squirm and tangle your fingers tighter in his hair, pushing against his face, eager for more. 

"tim-... timmy," you beg.

timothée kisses his way back up your body. "hm?" he hums softly beside your ear only for you to utter another weak 'please' in response. 

"please… please what, mon amour?" 

"baise moi.." you didn't know much french. you had picked up on a few of timothée's most used phrases, but this you hadn't learned from him, so it caught him off-guard. stuck in a moment of shock. hearing you say something so dirty in french felt so strangely intimate; you didn't have to ask him twice. 

he slips his boxers, finally accompanying you in nakedness, and slips into you, moaning at the feeling of you around him. 

"fuck.. timmy-" you groan as he picks up his pace. he coos sweet nothings into your ear while drilling into your core. 

his head drops to your chest and the soft, sweet praises slowly turn into obscenities. "merde," he groans, picking up his pace even more. holding himself at arms length above you, he throws his head back; lips parted in pure bliss. 

you lift one of your hands to trail down timothée's torso. you lazily drag your fingertips across his chest and down to his stomach. the pleasure building inside you, your hand finds its way to your clit. “timmy... fuck! ple- please don’t stop. fuuuuuck!” 

“défaire pour moi, y/n.” you didn’t think french could ever drive you to orgasm, but when it came from timothé anything was possible. you convulse around him as your wave of pleasure washes over you. timothée reaching his own peak soon after, pulling out and emptying on your stomach. he quickly finds something to clean you up with before plopping down on the bed beside you. many silent moments pass - nothing but heavy breaths leaving either of you - before he speaks up. “you know,” he begins in a soft whisper, “i felt bad- like i was using you. just to go to events with me. i know you don’t really like them but-” 

you cut him off and turn to face him. “i might hate going to those award shows, but they’re a little less bad with you around.” 

he breaks into a wide smile and pulls you closer, putting his head on your stomach. "mon amour, je t'ai toujours aimé." you reach down to play with his curls and begin to drift off on your way to sleep. 

#timothee x reader #timothee chalamet x reader #timothée chalamet x reader #timothée chalamet imagines #timothee chalamet imagines #timothee chalamet #timothée chalamet #timothee chalamet smut #timothée chalamet smut #timothee x reader smut #timothée x reader smut #timothée chalamet x reader smut #smut #fluff #imagine #fanfic #fanfiction #timothee chalamet fanfiction #timothée chalamet fic #timothée chalamet fanfiction

[rogue-durin-16]

THINGS NEVER GO AS PLANNED (Part VI/VII)

"the downfall"

Summary: After Fred's death, George and Y/n lean on each other to carry on. This wasn't the most brilliant idea, though; George was pretty much in love with the girl, and Y/n— well, she had been dating Fred prior to the Battle of Hogwarts.

Pairing: George Weasley x Reader

Genre: angst mostly

Tags:

Suggested by: @crispykittywitch

Things never go as planned: @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @beautyschoo1dropout @s1ut4georgeweasley @sunshineandshadows @missmulti @accioweaslcy @andreaareynoso @georgeweasley16 @dianarte @skarlettmikaelson

Permanent taglist: @elia-the-bibliophile @randomparanoid @karlthecat15722 @thebutchersdaughtersblog @amourtentiaa @just-here-to-escape-from-reality

Warnings: language, allusions to sex

A/N: my apologies for keeping y'all waiting for this one darlings, but here comes the next part YAYY! Enjoy <3

Prologue: the aftermath

Part I: sleepless nights

Part II: candy floss

Part III: shock therapy

Part IV: wrong name

Part V: the perfect excuse

Part VII: apart

Epilogue: I still love you

Rogue-durin-16 masterlist

He had left me in the room that morning, alone, with regret and guilt straining my chest, with embarrassment and panic heaving over me, my only company being a terrible headache and a sore body.

I was still waiting for him to come back. Of course, he still lived in the apartment, but the day after, he slept at Shell Cottage because Bill needed help with the chores, and the next night at the Burrow because Molly had asked to keep an eye on 'the kids' —the kids being Ginny, Harry, Ron and Hermione— while she and Arthur were off to visit Andromeda, and at Lee's because Angelina was away and they were going to have a boys' weekend; in summary, he managed to avoid stepping into the flat while I was in there for an entire week.

I would be lying if I said the idea of moving out hadn't crossed my mind, but I knew I was being dramatic— we were being dramatic; we were adults, even if we forgot about it more often than not, and adults talk things out, so I decided to confront him at the only place I would manage to corner him; the shop.

When I descended from the office on the second floor, I spotted the ginger turning the 'CLOSED' to face the glass door. "Oi!" His head snapped to me as I climbed downstairs and he instantly walked to the shelves on the opposite side. "Can I have a word?" I requested, following him, only for George to move on to another shelf.

"Right now I'm quite busy." He replied, seemingly absent-minded as he pretended to check the products in front of him.

"This is important." I insisted, moving to stand besides him.

Not fast enough, though, because he was off to yet another part of the shop as soon as I got close. "I'm sure it can wait."

"You know it can't," I assured intently, stalking after him, only for him to speed up his own pace, moving from product to product without stopping too long in front of him. "George I'm- Oi, stop! We need to talk about this!"

"Well maybe I don't wanna talk about this!" He exclaimed, taking big steps under one of the stairs in order to shamelessly dodge the hand with which I had reached out to stop him.

"George Weasley don't run away from me!"

"I'm not running away from you!"

"You're literally RUNNING AWAY!"

He stopped circling the counter and stood across from me, slamming his palms over the till. "ALRIGHT, LOVE!" for the first time, I didn't like the way the name dripped off his tongue. "Let's talk about how we accidentally FUCKED! That's what you want so badly, isn't it?!" Flush crept up his neck and ears, and I couldn't tell if it was from anger or from timidness. "Go on, darling, lead the bloody way!"

I felt my own cheeks going red, partly because of his straightforward statement but also because I genuinely had never heard George raise his voice like he had just done.

"Cat's got your tongue now?!" My stuttering seemed to fuel his anger more. "C'mon, Y/n, talk! You wanted to talk!"

"SHUT THE HELL UP, GEORGE!" He clenched his jaw as his freckles drowned in a sea of pinkish red. "Yeah I want to talk! 'Cause that's what grown-ups do! We don't know how to act around each other so we just don't spend time together anymore— Fuck, I've barely seen you! AND WE. LIVE. TOGETHER!" I emphasised each word with stomps. "We can either pretend it didn't happen or talk it out to make sure we're on the same page, you choose but for Merlin's sake, don't avoid me!"

"OKAY!" His eyes widened, surprised at his own tone, and then he repeated in a softer, self-conscious one, "Okay." He breathed deeply and then added. "We're on the same page, right?" His eyebrows raised as he looked into my eyes. "It was... A mistake."

I should have noticed the uncertainty and hope in his voice, but I panicked and was too quick to respond, "Yeah! A massive mistake." My words stung my heart and, to my dismay, his own just as much. "Can we go back to being friends? Because I'm going crazy without you." I blamed our watery eyes to the argument we had had, and not to the fact that it had been a mistake.

He circled the counter and walked to me, hesitating before pulling me into a hug. "Can I...?" I tugged him closer, wrapping my arms around his middle. It took a moment for him to ease into my embrace, and I could tell we had fucked up our friendship for good. "It's alright, we'll make it right again." His words made me squeeze him tighter, as if he was about to vanish from my side.

And from then, we tried to make it right, we tried so hard, because it seemed so easy to make it wrong again.

Everytime we stood too close, everytime he leaned on to whisper something, everytime I helped him with his tie, our eyes would fall on each other's lips; I would sometimes drift off the conversation, staring too much at his mouth and hands, wandering if they would feel just as amazing as they had done while we were drunk.

"Y/n are you listening?"

"Uh yeah- I mean, no- sorry, what?"

I was so focused on trying to hide it that I didn't notice George was in the exact same situation, meaning that neither of us could give in, because we would go down together. In all honesty, it was doomed to happen at some point, we were just delaying the inevitable.

The moment came the last night of January, when George showed up in my room due to a really rough nightmare, and I, as always, invited him in so we could lay down together.

"Isn't this... Weird?" He murmured as we scooted closer. We had kept physical contact at bay for obvious reasons, and cuddling had been off the table since New Year.

"It doesn't have to be." I replied, my voice as quiet as his. "We've done this a thousand times."

"Right." He cleared his throat, averting his eyes from mines as we shifted in our places ever so slightly, trying to find a position where the situation turned less awkward.

And it happened, my mind got lost on the way his neck tensed, on the damp locks hanging over his forehead, sweaty due to the nightmare; on his plump lips, which he had just wetted with his tongue in the most subtle way. It was a nervous habit of him, something he would usually do, but that didn't make it any less hot.

"George..." I called his name without noticing, my heart hammering violently against my chest when his gaze landed on my eyes, quickly falling on my lips.

The next thing I knew was that he was holding my thigh over his hip, his other hand on the back of my neck while we shared a hungry kiss that, as soon as my hips involuntarily rocked against his, turned into something more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

GEORGE'S P. O. V.

The next morning we swore to each other that it was just another accident, that it would happen again.

And the next one too.

And the following.

The fifth time that happened, we agreed to call the situation a 'friends with benefits' kind of thing, well aware that it was an euphemism for the downfall of our friendship.

I had longed to be hers for so long, and it that moment, as I lay by her side in her bed, that wish seemed so close yet so far; I could reach out and my fingertips would touch her skin, yet I had never felt that distant towards her.

The moment my eyes were averted from her form, her gaze was laid on me. "You don't have to go."

"I know." I replied in a mumble, already sitting up and reaching for my pants. "But soon we'll have to get up, so I might as well do that and let you sleep." I didn't want to turn around, I didn't want to see her beautiful irises pleading for me to stay by her side, because I knew I would.

I saw on my peripheral vision her fingers attempting to carefully wrap around my wrist, and I was quick to stand up and walk to the door; sadly, I did not miss Y/n burying her face into the pillow, her hands fisting on the fabric ever so subtly.

She tried to hide her tears like that, and I agressively wiped mines as soon as I reached the corridor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Morning, lady!" I light-heartedly greeted Y/n without turning my back to the making of our breakfast when I heard the steps approaching the kitchen.

In the morning it was easier to pretend everything was back to normal; usually, the refreshing sunlight and the drowsiness provided by a night of sleep were enough to wash away the sad truth of our relationship.

"Good morning, sir." She responded with a yawn, rubbing her eyes as she walked to stand besides me, leaning against the counter with her arms folded. "Smells good." She commented, leaning on to take a peek at the scrambled eggs.

I was about to make a cocky, playful comment when it dawned on me what she was wearing; it was my jumper, one of the old ones that I exclusively used for pyjamas.

I knew she didn't do it intently; I had left it on the floor the previous night, and it was probably the first thing she grabbed, but it struck a nerve.

I had seen a similar scene way too many times before; a sleepy, dishevelled Y/n entering the kitchen with an ugly Weasley jumper as only clothing, ready to start the bickering with an almost identical version of me who would be making breakfast.

My head then travelled to the thought that lately crossed my mind more often than not and my heart clenched; In Y/n's eyes, I was, most likely, just a poor replacement for Fred.

"You alright?" That worried furrow appeared between her brows too often lately. We were both walking on eggshells, and it got me on my nerves.

"You don't have to ask if I'm alright every time I'm quiet." I hadn't meant it to come out harsh or curt, but it definitely did.

"You're not quiet, you're overthinking." She responded with a tinge of hostility.

"What's to overthink?" I fought the need to raise my voice.

"Dunno, you tell me." She squinted her eyes with a scrutinising gaze directed to me.

"Can we not do this?" I almost pleaded; heated arguments had become a usual thing between us —yet another sign of the unfixable problem we refused to address.

Y/n was about to reply something that would lead us into a fight when the doorbell rung. "Mister Weasley?" I took that as a cue to go open the door to Verity, already dressed on her uniform. "The Valentine's Day products arrived, should I unpack them or..." Her eyes flickered behind me and her cheeks heated up. "Y/n—" When I looked over my shoulder, I felt my own face flushing out of embarrassment. Y/n was still my employee and Fred's ex, so Verity catching a glimpse of her dressed in my jumper wasn't the best thing for any of us. "I— am I— sorry, am I interrupting?"

"You're not interrupting." I assured her with a reassuring smile. "Leave the boxes on the puking pastries section, we'll be down in ten."

"Alright, sir." Her curious gaze travelled to Y/n one last time, and with that, she was rushing back down to the shop.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

READER'S P. O. V.

The ache that had appeared on my chest the day after New Year would end up killing me, or at least it felt like that.

I had a dreadful gut feeling of knowing what caused that pain, but my mind refused to believe it was that, and kept pushing the sensation back into my heart day by day.

George had gone to relocate the puking pastries in the upper level of the shop so I could prepare the section with the Valentine's Day products.

My eyes dawned on the small packages of Amortentia. I knew it was a terrible idea but I needed to know.

I took a look around, making sure Verity wasn't near and George was up still, and brought one of the Amortentias under my nose. It didn't take long for the scents to besot me, and I had to put all my will on not to fall under the potion's spell.

The first smell to reach my nostrils was gunpowder; my heart skipped a bit when the next scent was vanilla.

Then strawberry and chocolate; candy floss cupcakes and George's cologne.

The tiny, heart-shaped bottle fell from my hands, scattering all over the shop's floor. "Shit!" I rapidly kneeled to pick the shattered glass when I realized it had echoed in the empty establishment.

"Oi! What was that?" George descended from the second floor, using the ladder. "Oh shit—" his hands took a hold on my bicep and pulled me away from the pool of pinkish pearl liquid that seemed to be attracting me. "Don't!" He warned Verity, who had attempted to jog in the potion's direction too. "Verity, can you bring me my wand?" The girl complied running up to the office.

In Verity's absence, George took the chance and cupped my cheeks, tilting my head up to check my eyes. "You alright?" I managed to give him a slow nod, my mind buzzing with the newly acquired information. "Getting the Amortentias was a bad idea, wasn't it?" I nodded again, producing a frown between his eyebrows. "No 'told you so'? Are you sure you're alright?" He chuckled nervously, his hands falling to his sides right in time for Verity to rush back to us.

"Here, Mister Weasley!"

"Thank you, darling." He politely replied, taking the wand and restoring the potion bottle in a swift movement. His eyes peeked at me again; I could see the worry growing on him. "Y/n-"

"I'm gonna go wash my face." The words hastily left my mouth before I dashed off to the restroom.

I closed the door behind me and took a look at the mirror; my pupils were blown and my cheeks pink. I ran the tab and splashed the water on my face a few times until the potion's mild effect was gone and my mind clear.

It was in that moment that it dawned on me that I was in love with George Weasley.

#harry potter fanfiction #george weasley headcanon #george weasley fanfiction #george weasley #george weasley fanfic #george weasley series #george weasley smut #george weasley fluff #george weasley fic #george weasley x you #george weasley x reader angst #george weasley x hufflepuff!reader #george weasley x y/n #george weasley x reader #george weasley x ravenclaw!reader #george weasley x gryffindor!reader #george weasley one shot #george x reader fluff #george x reader smut #george x reader #george weasley angst #george wealsey x reader

[plounce]

what if gay CATS........... were gay PERSONS

(info on this au under the cut)

theyre all shitty young adults just kind of. getting through their early 20s as best they can. or as much as they can. maybe things will get better someday, but right now they’re kind of spinning their wheels

magic exists but like eh it’s not a big thing don’t worry about it. it’s around but like whatever. not many people have it and it’s mostly just like. a curiosity or a party trick

demeter and bombularina are together, tugger and mistoffelees are together, bombularina and tugger occasionally fwb, it’s cool and aboveboard and it’s all fine

demeter:

bisexual with a preference for women. 24 years old

semi-psychic (not as powerful as tantomile or coricopat). tends to have vague and confusing prophetic dreams

dropped out of grad school for sociology due to trauma and ensuing intensified mental illness. kind of bitter about it, but tries to get through every day. general anxiety disorder even before all that

very nervous around most men she doesn’t know & trust

currently working at a barnes & noble starbucks, which sucks. she recently became the assistant manager, which turbo sucks because now she has more work for only like a buck raise, but at least she’s getting reliable shifts

her go-to therapy is cutting her hair with scissors. her hair is fried to all hell from regular bleaching

she’s learning how to crochet because she’s decided she needs to do something physically productively creative with her hands to distract herself from Stuff

bombalurina:

bisexual. 24 years old

got her bachelor’s in english two years ago and hasn’t found a job in her field and has kind of given up on it for now

she’s been bartending for like four years, does freelance editing work on the side. will occasionally write listicles for clickbait sites if she needs extra cash

literally any extra money she can save goes to tattoos. her right sleeve’s almost done

has natural red hair but dyes it cherry red

a hedonist to cope but is also just a natural hedonist. likes a good bath

i know that like the typical thing fandoms say about female characters is “doesn’t take shit” for the girlboss points but she truly does not take shit anymore. she used to take people’s shit sometimes but at this point in her life she’s tired and she has a girlfriend to be protective of. she has a couple people whose shit she will take (mostly just tugger) but besides them (and having to practice basic customer service to keep her job) she’s tired of other people’s shit! enough!

my personal take on bombalurina is a mix between the riot grrrls of the 90s and 80s punk girls, and then a dash of the greaser chicks from grease. i saw that spiked collar and my brain went OH okay i can run with this somewhere fun. same for demeter, but less so - she just has the piercings.

demelurina:

bombalurina met demeter in college at a women’s activism club, noticed her because of her dimple piercings and was like “oh someone else with a lot of metal in her face, i’ll sit next to her”

they were each other’s first off-campus roommates and were close friends. made out a couple times, but it was mostly a lot of sexual tension. there was a lot of bombalurina staring at demeter while she or demeter made out with someone else

demeter was on and off with her high school boyfriend munkustrap and bombalurina was like “oh he’s so much more stable/calm than me and she needs that, i party a bit too much for her, i shouldn’t try anything” so she just sort of. lets their almost-there peter off

(this is all bombalurina’s internal thoughts - demeter always was interested in her, but thought she was too boring for bombalurina. so neither of them thought they could pursue it)

bombalurina graduated and moved somewhere cheaper further away from campus. they kind of drift apart

munkustrap and demeter peter off and he moves away for a job (they’re still good friends, it was a very amicable breakup) and then demeter gets with macavity, which is a deeply toxic situation for her and sucks hugely and throws her whole life really off track. won’t go into further details

she finally manages to break up with him and calls bombalurina at like 2 am asking if she can pick her up, and also if she can sleep on her couch, it’s okay if that’s not okay, she just. really needs a place she feels safe, and her gut is telling her to. and of course bombalurina says yes

bombalurina also knew macavity and had also made out a couple times with him at like parties and stuff (see: staring at demeter as she makes out with people). something about transference of feelings - bombalurina was into him for a couple moments because he and demeter had a thing.

this is due to me interpreting the song “macavity” as actually about bombalurina wanting to fuck demeter and her singing as a half-repressed expression of that. i use my really good wlw brain to reach that conclusion. it’s kind of a non-competitive version of eve sedgwick’s take on the love triangle. (<-- normal thing to say)

but anyway demeter stays on bombalurina’s couch and she tries so hard to stay on track but eventually she just has to drop out. bombalurina helps her with that too. she’s just really supportive even as demeter’s life is at its lowest point. when she gets home from bartending she gets demeter to go to sleep

she just Stays with her and makes her smile and reminds her that her life isn’t over, there’s still things in her day to enjoy, to keep her trudging forward

bombalurina is roommates with tugger at this point - he also recently dropped out and demeter knows him because he’s munkustrap’s brother, so he’s Trusted and also is like “hey it’s okay that you dropped out, im here and im chilling and you like me and respect me at least a little, and you have a bachelor’s degree at least!” (more on him later)

demeter is like “oh god ive been crashing at their place for so long not paying rent, theyre gonna ask me to leave, im such a freeloader, they wont take my attempts at paying rent” but then bombalurina and tugger are like “hey! the lease is almost up! we found a pretty good 3 bedroom, do you wanna have your own room for real?” and she nearly cries because 1. the RELIEF 2. oh my god you want me around???

cut to bombalurina helping demeter put together an ikea dresser (tugger got banished to the kitchen to make crystal light lemonade for them because he’s useless with a screwdriver) and demeter has two epiphanies:

1. i thought i was ready to d*e four months ago and here i am making a dresser to put clothes into in my new apartment where i live and feel safe and loved. im still not happy but im still alive and im making a dresser

2. holy fuck im back in love with my best friend, and ten times more than i was back then.

so she like kind of freaks out because she’s already imposed so much on bombalurina, how could she impose her FEELINGS on her like this, oh no oh no oh no

meanwhile bombalurina’s back in love with her even MORE and she’s also like no... she’s already dealing with so much... i don’t want to make her uncomfortable or feel unsafe in her own home especially after her recent relationship trauma... i just want her to feel safe around me...

you might think tugger as their roommate would be like “JUST KISS” but he is in fact pretty oblivious because he is self-absorbed. mistoffelees on the other hand..

eventually they do have a big confession of feelings after demeter has a bad day and it’s very dramatic and they make out in the rain. and it’s like. well this is a movie scene. but also im cold and damp. let’s head inside our home and get warm and dry :)

and then they go inside and and talk through everything, all their feelings (not just their romantic feelings but like ALL their feelings) and their shared histories and bombalurina is like “do you think you’re... ready for a relationship right now? like that would be a good thing for you?”

and demeter considers it. she does stop and think. and then she says, “with anyone else... probably not. but it’s you. and i feel so safe around you, and we’re already so close. you make the future feel more worth it. you make more days alive feel not just tolerable, but something to look forward to. and knowing you’ve loved me all this time... it’s nice. it’s good. i’m - i’m understating it so much, it’s more than nice, it’s just - it’s a lot. i wish i had noticed back then.” “hey, hey, don’t blame yourself. i’m the one who never said anything.”

anyway. everything works out, and they start dating for real :)

tugger:

bisexual. 22 years old

dishwasher at the same bar bombalurina works at. she got him the job. he keeps bugging her to teach him bartending tricks and on slow nights she will agree to

he dropped out of their four year, but he managed to secure an associate’s in communications before he dipped

trying to be an ig influencer hotboy and hopefully get modeling jobs from that but his phone’s camera sucks shit so his account isn’t really going anywhere. but he continues to post his low resolution shirtless selfies

trying to cope with being the failure son who does not have a fancy nonprofit job with a salary and healthcare by being self-absorbed and self-aggrandizing

it works about 60% of the time and 60% of the times that it doesn’t he’s able to hide it

he dropped out right around when bombalurina graduated and he was like HEY! ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A ROOMMATE WHO DOESN’T CARE IF WE LIVE TEN MILES AWAY FROM CAMPUS? WELL HAVE I GOT A SOLUTION FOR YOU: ME!

to which bombalurina (who has fooled around with him here and there and thinks he is funny little man and genuinely goodhearted, and also he has rockin abs as a plus) says munkustrap already asked me if i need a roommate and if i do to consider you, because you don’t want to move back home. in other words: yes, you little idiot

they do fool around with each other but they are both very understanding that it is strictly platonic and for fun, especially once they become roommates. they both do not desire each other for anything serious

he did have a bit of a crush on each other when they met (hot punk older girl who’s friends with his brother) but 1. it dissipated pretty quick after they fooled around for the first time because it was not a very serious crush 2. she was in the middle of being in love with demeter so she was focused on that, emotionally

he got his ears pierced a couple times in high school but bombalurina inspired him to get a couple more. she went with him when he got his nose pierced

demeter has always understood that him and bombalurina are strictly fwb, has never been an issue.

she and him like to bleach their hair together when their hair schedules line up (he bleaches his way less often then she does), but she refuses to use his fancy conditioner that keeps his hair unfried because it’s expensive, even though he tells her to go ahead and use it, please, the health of her hair is giving HIM anxiety, demeter please. please demeter

mistoffelees:

gay. 20 years old

has magic. it’s pretty good magic but again: magic is not a big deal in this concept

a bit spooky. skulks around. a bit of a bitch but also very very nice. chooses when to speak

he has postings on craigslist and fiverr about finding lost objects and people with magic. like a gig economy private detective

side job is a waiter at a fancy restaurant

sometimes he gets paid VERY well from the private detecting, depending on the client. he does ask his psychic friends (tantomile & coricopat) to give a quick glance over on some of the more suspicious clients just to make sure he isn’t finding someone who should not be found by that person.

doesn’t go to college. is roommates with his sister victoria, who’s a freshman and studying dance. moved into town with her so she wouldn’t have to live in the dorms by having a guaranteed roommate.

tuggoffelees:

the general vibe i want for these two is mistoffelees walking around town or driving around in his shitty toyota camry while tugger tags along because he’s bored and thinks this is cool as shit

the general tone of the au is “magic isn’t a big deal” except for tugger, who thinks mistoffelees’ magic and his magic freelancing is the coolest shit ever. this is mostly because he just likes mistoffelees. “there are people who can do cooler shit than me, tug” “yeah but i don’t KNOW them also theyre not as COOL as you” “you had to explain to me how instagram reels work”

idk how they met i just think tugger shows up at his and bombalurina’s apartment one day (this is when demeter has moved in but they havent moved to the 3br yet) with this dude to dash in and pick something up and bombalurina is like “uh. who’s this” “oh this is mistoffelees he’s SO GOOD AT MAGIC” [mistoffelees nods hello] “okay bye bombalurina see you at work!!!” “uh. later”

after that he just shows up a lot. sort of ambiguous if theyre dating or what for a while before bombalurina straight up asks like “hey does the dude you’re dating know we fool around” “the dude im - what?” “... the little magic guy who keeps using our hot cocoa mix. misty.” “oh. uh. we aren’t dating.” “... do you want to? because you’re kind of all over him constantly” “um. well! haha, if i wanted to, i could! haha!” “yeah get back to me on that”

tugger trying to use his ig clout to get mistoffelees more work even though 1. he has no clout 2. mistoffelees has a very stable client base. but mistoffelees appreciates the effort. the self-promo guy promoing someone other than himself... the highest expression of love...

mistoffelees is A Nonthreatening Man plus he’s pretty obviously gay so demeter is chill around him pretty quickly. when mistoffelees is over they’ll sit on the couch where demeter sleeps and watch documentaries quietly while she crochets

they both occasionally say spooky shit at the same time because magic stuff. bombalurina and tugger are both torn between “that was cool as fuck” and “god that’s unnerving”

just a lot of tugger following mistoffelees around on his jobs and mistoffelees letting him because he’s fond of him and them occasionally getting into minor peril and interesting shenanigans, but it is 90% fetch quests

i think the first time they met tugger was taking selfies in front of a hydrangea in a public park and he saw mistoffelees walk up with a shovel and start digging in one of the flower beds and he thought he was hot so he went over and offered to take over on the shoveling to look strong and masculine and he ended up digging up a skull, which mistoffelees picked up and said “thanks” and then walked away

mildly terrifying but also very interesting and tugger’s days are kind of boring and dishwashing kind of sucks as a job to do like every night and he is a person who thrives on novelty so. moth to a porchlight

i think they do start making out for fun here and there and then a while later theyre out on one of mistoffelees’ jobs and someone asks “who’s the guy with you” and mistoffelees replies “oh that’s my boyfriend, don’t worry about him” and then it’s like. “HUH? I’M YOUR BOYFRIEND?” “uh. yeah? i assumed. is that okay?” ��i mean yeah of course i think you’re great! how long have we–” “oh like a while.” “oh. uh. cool!!”

they just hang out a lot. mistoffelees enjoys teasing him and enjoys his warmth and bombasticity and tugger likes watching and helping him solve little mysteries around the county because it’s always something new. they’re kind of a comedy duo. they just enjoy spending their time together and following mistoffelee’s internal magic gps to find lost dogs and lost necklaces

yeah right now this au is just vibes and just sort of. continuing forward with your days and your weeks and your months. just young adults hanging out

#cats the musical #mr mistoffelees #rum tum tugger #demeter cats #bombalurina #tuggoffelees #demelurina #chirps #bird in the hand

[thoseofgreatambition]

Hi LeeAnnnnnn Can i plz request a drabble of just dad George? Im so obsessed with dad twins rn and Ive given a lot of attention to Fred but i wanna see some Georgie love too! Ty ily 🧡

thank you love! i do adore some dad!george kind of a continuation of my other dad george from a while back with his toddler? also heavily influenced by my own father so hope y’all like it

Being a father is hard. George had known it going into every appointment, every decision he’d made with you, every moment. 

Being a father was much harder than he thought. 

He watched as his son struggled to find himself and shouted when he couldn’t contain his emotions. The kicks at walls and tears when Fred Jr. couldn’t handle what was going on. The arguments and the crying at night. 

The overwhelming love was almost suffocating-- but it was a struggle. On nights like tonight. 

Long ago, when you were still alive, the two of you had realized that giving the boy some space worked the best. 

So space was being given. 

George wondered if it was all the long nights at work that made little Freddy so upset. He’d started bringing his son to work-- had turned the backroom into a proper play room or flex room that Fred might like. 

Perhaps he should have listened to that parenting book and not have named his son after his dead brother-- something about expectations. 

Your death had been hard on them both, perhaps it was just a matter of it making things so much harder. 

Either way-- his son had been gone for two nights so far after storming out and screaming at his parent. He always came back. Freddy always came back. Usually it was after having slept on a friends couch, but he always came back. 

George’s hand shook as he tried to piece together the product in his shed. 

Going to hogwarts hadn’t made things much better-- aside from the fact that Freddy had more friends now than just his cousins. On the breaks Freddy just seemed to revert back to the sad, angry boy he’d always been. 

Dozens of parenting books stood on dusty shelves. None had seemed to help. 

A door slammed back inside of the house-- Freddy was back. 

George took his time to approach the door, before knocking. He could hear the boy crying-- turning 15 seemed to make things worse.

“Freddy? Can I come in? I’ve got some dinner for you.” 

A grumbled response came from inside the room, and George walked into a mess of a bedroom with his son crying so hard his eyes were swollen shut. With a frown, George handed his son a handkerchief to wipe his eyes with. “If you keep rubbing them you’ll hurt them Freddy.” 

With a huff, George sat down on the bed. He’d tried putting Freddy in activities. Tried cooking more healthy food. Tried earlier bed times. 

And his son was still in pain. Crying until he couldn’t breathe. George stroked his son’s hair as the young man sobbed into the comforter. More silence, more space. 

George loved being a father, but it was hard. 

“Dad, I messed up.” 

“What happened, Freddy?” 

“I was out with friends, I went to sleep at Danny’s house. His cousin was there and I got into an argument with him. A bad one.” 

George’s hand left his son’s head and moved to pat him on the shoulder as Freddy finally began to sit up in the bed. 

“I was screaming at his cousin-- he was an asshole! He was being a prick about you, couldn’t let him talk down about you not finishing school!” 

“I don’t need you to defend me Freddy--” 

“He was being an ass! And I got too mad and I--” Freddy seemed to falter under his father’s worried gaze and seemed to wither. “I cursed him. Nothing too bad-- Danny’s mum is a healer so it got sorted but... I got one of those notices from the ministry-- they say I’m going to get kicked out of Hogwarts--” 

“I won’t let that happen.” At Freddy’s hopeful look, George continued, “You won’t get kicked out-- your Uncle Harry had done far crazier things at that point. I’ll take you to the ministry to get it sorted. But you’re going to go and see someone about all of this Freddy.” 

There were more tears. “Danny said he doesn’t want to see me ever again. My friends hate me now.” 

George continued to pat his son on the back. The parenting books hadn’t done much to help him about this. His vision began to blur, but he didn’t want to make things worse by crying. “You made a bad choice, Freddy. They’re upset with you. They’ll need time, and you’ll need to give it to them and respect their choices. It doesn’t make you someone bad, it means that you need to work more on your anger issues.” 

When his son collapsed into tears once more, George kept his own tears at bay. It was hard not to wonder about what he could have done different so that Freddy wouldn’t be having such a rough go of things. If you were here things would be better. You were always so good at setting things straight. 

“I need you to eat what you can and shower up. We’re going to go and get this all sorted out in the morning.” 

“Are you mad at me, Dad?” 

“No.” George wiped at his tears and made himself look down at his son, “I’m just sad that all of this happened. But I’m not mad. You’re a good boy who made a mistake.” 

A silence, before Freddy pressed onward. “Do you still love me?” 

“Always. You couldn’t do anything to change that.” George was more openly crying at the moment. Dozens of words he wanted to say held back simply for the fact that it wasn’t right to burden his child with his own insecurities about parenting. “I love you to bits and pieces.” 

“I love you too.” Freddy looked at his father-- the strong man he looked up to for years and felt incredibly vulnerable to see him upset. Both struggled to get a grip of themselves. “I know I’m in trouble-- will you stay in here for a little while longer, please?” 

George didn’t answer, and simply nodded as he wiped away his tears. He’d do anything for his boy. 

#my writing #george weasley #george weasley imagine #wand3ringr0s3 #ask and ye shall recieve

[timextoxhajima]

NOO i swear you're not taking any of my time huhu i love talking to you😭😭 tbh i usually have time at nights but i'd rather use them to sleep or watch some tbz content bc my a test every 3 weeks schedule is still going but i have a lot more to do now so i'd usually spent the first 1 weeks with taking as much rests as i can 🥲

and no worries ur not making me feel pressured to reveal myself!!!! im just saying this bc i really wanna be friends w u,, but if i ever leave tumblr then i WILL OFC I WILL TELL U

hehehe yea i love trying new hobbies no matter how bad i may be at them just to find the feeling of joy when i feel like im truly enjoying them, and with writing even when what i write has nothing to do with my thoughts it really help in keeping my minds busy instead of drifting away into bad thoughts🥲🥲 i do video editing too sometimes, photography, but its kinda hard thanks to the pandemic so yeah,,, editing sunwoo video it is for me😭😂 i hope you found ur getaway too!!! or did u already?

I C THE NEW ENHYPEN POST OMG IVE BEEN SEEING THEM A LOT LIKE A WHOLE LOT EVERYWHERE not to mention im also a shawol so i know that ni-ki was one of the shinee kid?? in shinee's japanese concert😭😂 but i havent found the time to know abt the other members yet so--

ANW I RLLY LOVE THAT FOR UU its good that you're getting a lot more comfortable❤️ so does that mean you are currently on a holiday? yea coming back to uni really sucks sometimes i hated it a lot too but these days i've gotten a lot closer to my friends and i miss them so much now that we havent seen each other for months🥲

i'm pretty good! all the preparation has been kinda a lot and my research supervisor has been kinda laterep lately which is making me super anxious most of the time bc i really need to get everything done by august😭😭 but yeah writing has helped me A LOT in shifting my thoughts and making me feel better, i hope i am taking care of myself enough

how about you dana? are you taking care of yourself ? - 🍋🍋

omg just sleep LMAO just fkin sleep it's fine tumblr isn't worth your physical health HAHAHAHHAHA yeah your 3-week test schedule sounds disgustang fam idk how you do it so props to you

omg... tbh photography is a great way to ?? learn about life?? does that make sense lol i started photography in 2013 and now i've shifted more into filming, writing and editing so it was a very nice shift and transition for me. i guess my getaway definitely includes writing fics, i'm on a video production intern right now too so i get to shoot in studios and edit the footage later on. i was supposed to go on a chill photoshoot with a friend but covid said fuck you LMAO but i might get paid to help my freshies do their committee photoshoot at the end of the year so that'll be a blast. i love brainstorming themes for photoshoots and like templating designs - i think i'm an all-rounded creative person, as in into creatives [not boasting about... my creativity] but i definitely love the freedom in expression and i'm starting to realise that i'm picking up every single medium i could possibly utilise to exploit this freedom of expression thing: writing, dancing, filming, photography, creative designs, you name it LOL

yes niki was a shawol!! he went for a tokyo dome concert of shinee's and key hugged him while he cried LMAO he said it was like 2014 or smth which meant that niki was fucken... 9... stanning enha has been a JOURNEY for me because all this while i've been stanning groups that are generally older than me. even with skz jeongin i began to feel a tad awkward because he's younger, and with txt i basically couldn't whole-heartedly stan them because 3/5 of them are younger than me... then you have enha whose maknae is younger than my sister?! like... fam... how... why... am i that old now... omg

yeah i am on holiday! my sem ended in late april and since then i've been pretty much rotting at home, handling my intern projects, writing, learning some choreos for more covers and sobbing over kdramas owo the tissues wasted LMAO i love this break for myself honestly cause the sem was such a shitshow and i lost a friend or two over some nonsense and i had conflict with a couple of others too so while i do miss their nonsense, i really need the time away from these idiots who act like 5 year olds sometimes

omg i hope your supervisor knows not to pressure you too much, like work-life balance is a thing there right... >.>

i'm so happy you're writing that shit out. back before i began to write i felt so suffocated and i can't imagine my life if i didn't go into writing so i'm glad you found this portal to escape, even if it is for a moment!

i'm taking of myself... by keeping myself at home LMAO i haven't seen friends for like... weeks now, which is pretty surprising given the circumstances, because we're not on lockdown and you can still go out in pairs and i've had friends trying to get me out of the house to hang but i'm... so lazy... and frankly just uninterested in a social life now. idk how i shd feel about that, it's like the introvert rlly hopped the fuck out after i spent majority of the past sem acting like an extrovert.

if you consider sleeping at 4am every night taking care of myself then HEY i guess im fit as a pickle HAHAHAHHAHAHAH

#tth.lemonanon

[burgeonmeraki]

My Current Skincare Routine

I believe in investing in your skin because it's going to represent you for a very long time. As much as I love wearing makeup, I’d still wanna look natural on the outside. But I also want to go out in public and not wear that much makeup. That’s why I'm a big believer that if you focus on your skincare, you really won't need a lot of makeup. Skincare is self-care.

Just a background story of my skin lol.

This is me back in High School.

Back when I was in high school (the puberty period), I literally have no problem with my skin. I never had any kind of breakout the whole high school life, and for that, I considered myself lucky. I don’t know if it’s in our genes or what, but I think my irregular period explained why I don't break out? I'm not sure hehe.

But when I stepped into college, that’s when I started having cystic acne, just once every month. I noticed my skin reacts in a different environment than I’m used to. Like when I was in college, I was studying in Manila. Manila is known for its air pollution because of traffic congestion. I have also found out that the water in Manila has chlorine, and I feel like my skin gets irritated, and that causes acne or breakout.

My brother who lives in South Korea sent a lot of skin care products. ca. 2017

I started using skincare products when I was in college, but mostly it's just facial wash, toner, and moisturizer. Then 3 years ago, I started putting serum on my face, a sheet mask or clay mask, and my skin feels so good after. My face feels so hydrated and the product that I used which is Innisfree works for me.

April 2018

RECENT BREAKOUT STORY (2020)

Ever since this pandemic and lockdown happened, I started breaking out. My skin became super oily, I thought maybe it was just the heat because it was summer then. I update my skincare, and nothing seems to work on me. And then I thought, maybe it was a hormonal imbalance, so I started taking pills for two months, still not working. The worst part of it, my pimples are cystic. Before, whenever I get a pimple it was just once every month. But now, when one pimple heals, there's another one comes, and they're mostly on my T-zones, which is the oiliest part of my face. I was so stressed about it, so I decided to see a Dermatologist at Cutis Essentials. Take note: this is my first time seeing and consulting a Dermatologist.

In order for the Doctor to treat me, she asked me a bunch of questions like, what kind of product do I use, she asked about my skin history and family history, and if I am taking some medicines or vitamins, and so on. And from that, I have learned that too much Vitamin E, B6, and B12 can cause acne. I have never taken any kind of vitamins in my whole adult life because I hate drinking medicines, but since there's a virus spreading all over the world, killing millions of people, I started taking it to boost my immune system. She gave me an oral medicine called Doxycycline and Epiduo Gel that dries up my acne. I stopped taking my pills and multivitamins and just stick to Vitamin C. I also stopped using this cleanser St. Ives Apricot Scrub and switch to a more mild facial cleanser. And hurrah, I finally see a good result. My face started clearing up little by little, and the oiliness lessens a bit. All I need to do is to get rid of my dark spots, which takes time.

The thing with doing your skincare routine, you have to stick with it consistently. And I gotta admit, there are days that I'm so lazy to do it and just skip some steps. Like sometimes I just removed my makeup, washed it, then put some toner to clean the excess dirt, then I'm done. That's my slacky routine. Don't do it hehe.

I did a one week sheet mask challenge and my skin feels so good after. I definitely recommend this product that I got from BeautyMnl. It’s called Superfood Coconut Salad Mask Package from the brand Farm Skin.  Last pic on the lower right, that’s The Ordinary AHA 30% + BHA 2% Peeling Solution. 

A video of my skincare routine. Sorry if it’s a bit confusing LOL. I’ll make a better video next time hehe. 

MY CURRENT SKINCARE ROUTINE & HOW TO LAYER PRODUCTS:

I want to be clear, I am not a dermatologist or esthetician, but this method has worked for me. If your skin is irritated, I recommend hitting the reset button and start from scratch. Try introducing new products one at a time and use it consistently for a few days to see if it's working for you. Also, try to learn more about what your skin needs. Like if you have dry skin, moisturizer and hydrate i every day. If you have an oily skin like me, try to lessen the products that’s very greasy, and don’t use it during the day. Just stick with light moisturizer. It is a little bit of a process and takes time, but once you have it figured out, your skincare routine will be on autopilot, and your skin will look better and better.

Here are the products that I am currently using:

FACIAL CLEANSER

Brand: COSRX

AC Collection Foaming Cleanser

Cosrx is a Korean product. This gentle foam cleanser fights acne. It manages excess oil, without stripping skin of essential moisture. With BHA to exfoliate, lauric acid to provide antibacterial support, and centella ingredients to soothe, this creamy cleanser clears skin while keeping irritation at bay. | I have been using this for 3 months now and the brand works on me. My skin feels so soft after using this.

TONER

Brand: COSRX

AHA/BHA Clarifying Treatment Toner

Formulated with AHA, BHA and purifying botanical ingredients, the AHA/BHA Clarifying Treatment Toner works to soothe, refresh and soften the skin. It is effective for hydrating evening skin tone and texture, and it’s a mild exfoliation. | This toner for me is very gentle and it doesn’t sting and harsh like the other toner that I used before.

MOISTURIZER

Brand: COSRX

AC Collection Light Weight Soothing Moisturizer

This cream moisturizer provides light, non-sticky hydration for acne-prone skin. Made with asiatic acid, niacinamide, and zinc salt, it calms and strengthens skin’s moisture barrier while controlling excess oil. | I love this moisturizer! It’s not greasy so it’s okay to use it during the day because it’s fast-absorbing.

SERUM

Brand: THE ORDINARY

Niacinamide 10% + Zinc 1%

The Ordinary comes from Canada. A high-strength vitamin- and mineral-packed formula to minimize the look of blemishes. Contains a high 10% concentration of niacinamide (vitamin B3); reduces the appearance of spots, marks, and congestion; supported by zinc salt of pyrrolidone carboxylic acid to balance visible aspects of sebum activity. | I’ve heard a lot of good reviews about this product so I tried it, and the brand works for me. It just really takes time to lighten up my dark spots but it works.

EXFOLIATION

Brand: THE ORDINARY

AHA 30% + BHA 2% Peeling Solution

A 10-minute liquid mask treatment that exfoliates to visibly improve skin texture and tone. This product goal is to enhance brightness, even out skin, and decongest pores; exfoliates the topmost epidermal surface; helps fight visible blemishes for improved radiance; reduces the look of fine lines with continued use. | Take note: this peeling solution stings for a few sec, but it’s tolerable. Read the instruction first before using this product. When I first used this, I noticed my skin feels like a glass skin, like it looks healthy. I was expecting my face to peel,  but it didn’t. I only use this 2-3x a week or whenever my skin needs it. 

PROTECTION

Brand: THE ORDINARY

Vitamin C Suspension 30% in Silicone

Helps reverse multiple signs of skin aging with vitamin C, an effective antioxidant; naturally brightens and refines tone and texture; feels smooth on the skin thanks to very light silicones despite the suspension format of the formulation. | I just recently purchased this and I think it’s a great add for my skincare routine to reduce all the blemishes on my face and fights skin aging because well, I’m not getting any younger anymore. This one is a bit greasy so I only use this in the evening, and it has an off smell but fades away for a few sec.

CLAY MASK

Brand: INNISFREE

Super Volcanic Pore Clay Mask 2X

Innisfree is a Korean product. Features 2x more powerful adherence to sebum for intensive pore care; provides triple exfoliation from encapsulated Jeju volcanic scoria, walnut shell powder, and AHA; enhanced deep cleansing formula removes away fine dust particles, pore-clogging dirt, and dead skin cells; provides powerful sebum-absorbing capacity as it washes away impurities while moisturizing and brightening skin; leaves a cooling sensation when applied that refreshes pores. | I have been using the 1.0 version of this for 3 years, which is the Super Volcanic Pore Clay Mask without 2x. I super love this clay mask because this brighten up my dark spots so fast. I only use this 2-3x a week or whenever my face needs it. I recommend this product.

SHEET MASK

Brand: INNISFREE

My Real Squeeze Mask

These face masks are dew-licious skin treats that target your skin's unique concerns and bump your entire routine up a notch. | So Innisfree has a lot of sheet mask that can be tailored to your skin's daily needs. All I can say that whenever I use this sheet mask, my face feels so hydrated, and fresh. It’s an instant boost for my skin. So every time my face looks so dry and dull, I use this product. 

LASH BOOST

Brand: SKIN GENIE

Hair Growth Booster

Skin Genie is a Philippine product. This nourishing clear serum is the answer to fuller brows and lashes. It helps minimize hair loss, prevent breakage, and prime the strands for healthier regrowth. | This product smells so good and I noticed that my lashes became more stronger, longer, and a bit thicker. It will just take times but it works its magic. I put this if I’m about to sleep because the serum goes inside my eyes and kinda sting a little bit.

LIP CARE

Brand: VASELINE

Lip Therapy

A lip-healing jelly with a mouthwatering chocolate fragrance for silky, supple lips. Clinically proven to moisturize chapped lips; instantly softens and soothes dryness and flaking; locks in moisture to help lips recover from discomfort; leaves a healthy, glossy shine; non-sticky formula glides on smoothly. | My lips get dry very easily, and it always turned chapped. Before I go to sleep, I always make sure to put some of this and viola, the next morning my lips feel so soft and hydrated. I used cocoa butter at night, then I use rosy lips during the day whenever I put my makeup on, and they smell so good.

MOISTURIZER

Brand: NATURE REPUBLIC

Aloe Vera 92% Soothing Gel

A hydrating and cooling gel containing 92% pure aloe vera. Gently moisturizes all skin types, including sensitive skin; soothes and refreshes dry, dehydrated, inflamed, and sunburnt areas; firms skin and naturally protects with vitamins C, E, and other minerals; fast-absorbing gel won’t leave a greasy feel; can be used on hair, face, and body as a moisturizer, mask, and/or sleeping pack | I super love this product. I have been using this for more than 2 years now and it does wonder on my skin. I use it on my hair and body too.

ANTI-ACNE GEL

Brand: GALDERMA

Epiduo Gel (Adapalene and Benzoyl Peroxide) 0.1%/2.5%

Epiduo is a prescription medicine used to treat the symptoms of Acne Vulgaris. Epiduo may be used alone or with other medications. Epiduo belongs to a class of drugs called Acne Agents, Topical Combos. | This gel is pricey, and this was prescribed to me by my Dermatologist. I still use this whenever I have acne, and it dries up my acne fast. 

ACNE PATCH

Brand: COSRX

Acne Pimple Master Patch

This is the original set of hydrocolloid stickers that comes with three different sizes to spot-correct pimples. It heals intensively overnight, protecting problem areas from infection and brings out deep-rooted blemishes without leaving behind scars. Slap a patch on your breakouts for instant relief away from bacteria. This will stop the insane urge to pick at your skin and pop your pimples. It’s made with A.D.F. hydrocolloid dressing, a unique material that helps extract gunk from stubborn zits and speeds up their life cycle. | I absolutely love this patch. I use this in the evening whenever I have a very bad acne. TIP: I use the Epiduo Gel first, applied it on my acne, and then let it dry first before putting the patch. I promise, the next day your acne heals so fast! But sometimes, if it's cystic, it will take a few try like 2-3 patch every night.

ACNE PATCH

Brand: LUXE ORGANIX

Hydrocolloid Acne Spot Patch Night Time

When patched to acne; it increasingly absorbs the pus and oil to reduce inflammation and fasten the healing process. This brand is from Korea. | This product works well on me too, plus it contains more patches than Cosrx. Cosrx isn't available in most stores here in Bataan, so I have to order it online. I just go to Watson and buy this, which is very convenient for me. 

CLEANSER

Soft Silicone Facial Cleansing Brush

Gently scrub your face with this along with the Foaming Cleanser, it is easy to use. It is great for getting rid of dirt and clogged up skin. I noticed that after I wash my face with full on makeup, it get rids all the excess makeup and dirt that you have on your face because whenever I apply my toner, you can’t barely see any dirt. You better get one of this. I got mine from Watson, and it is very affordable. 

FACIAL MASSAGE

Brand: BE KIND

Jade Facial Roller + Guasha Set

This beauty tool duo will renew fatigued skin in just a few cooling strokes. Made from 100% authentic jade, each tool is uniquely designed for restorative facial massages. Not only do these tools boost product absorption, they also offer different types of massages. The roller stimulates lymphatic drainage that reduces puffiness, while the gua sha relieves tense facial muscles. When used together, they liven up dull skin for a fresh, well-rested look. | Sadly, I broke my jade roller, but I am getting one soon. Make sure that before you use this tool, put it first on the freezer for a few minutes, and it feels so good, I swear! I used the jade roller whenever I put on my sheet mask. While I used guasha whenever I put on my moisturizer because it glides really well when your skin is moisturize.

OIL CONTROL

Brand: THE FACE SHOP

Oil Blotting Films

Contains 50 silky-soft blotting sheets; made with excellent oil-absorbing 3M film; works to absorb excess sebum; leaves skin looking fresh and grease-free. | I read that if you have oily skin and you're wearing makeup, don't put on another layer of powder just to get rid of the oiliness on your face. Instead, use this oil-blotting film to remove all the oil before retouching your makeup. It's a helpful way not to clog your pores and for your makeup not to look cakey. 

More skincare products that works on me but I don’t use it anymore:

MOISTURIZER

Brand: DRUNK ELEPHANT

Protini™ Polypeptide Cream

Protini’s proprietary formula restores younger, revived-looking skin, almostfrom the first application. Lines, wrinkles, and signs of sun damage appearreduced, and skin feels strengthened and moisturized. | I only have the sample bottle of this because this brand is a little expensive but I heard a lot of good reviews on this. It’s a bit thick for my taste, so I make sure to wear this at night and not under my makeup, that’s only if you have oily skin. 

SHEET MASK

Brand: FARMSKIN

Superfood Coconut Salad Mask Package

A set of 7 sheet masks that leaves your skin brighter, hydrated, and more youthful. Nourish, moisturize, and illuminate skin with this set of sheet masks formulated with a combination of superfoods and colostrum ingredient. | First time using this product, and so far, it doesn't have any negative reaction on my skin since they used organic ingredients on their products. Farmskin has different kinds of sheet mask packages, and it is tailored depends on your skin's daily needs. This package is for brightening and hydrating my face since I need to get rid of my blemishes and dark spots.

FACIAL OIL

Brand: HERES B2UTY

Tea Tree Oil Serum

A multi-benefit serum that clarifies your complexion. Treats acne and soothes redness and swelling with tea tree oil; enriched with green tea, which contain antioxidant and anti-inflammatory catechins to hydrate and regulate excess oil production; fades spots, eliminates acne scars, and protects against free radicals with chamomile, a powerhouse antioxidant; improves moisture levels as it minimizes the look of fine lines and wrinkles with rose hip oil; alleviates irritation as it tightens skin with antiseptic and anti-inflammatory witch hazel; draws moisture to skin with hyaluronic acid to revitalize skin’s outer layers; plumps, restores, and renews to instantly improve the appearance of fine lines. | When I started using this, I thought it was to prevent me from having acne. This oil doesn't work on my acne though, but it lessens the oiliness on my face. I just don't use it very often because I'm so lazy or sometimes I forgot. LOL

TONER

Brand: ESKINOL

Spotless White Classic Cleanser

Eskinol provides products which are specifically formulated for the Filipina skin. Its range of products is known to effectively solve oily skin problems and pimples. Removes deep-seated dirt, excess oil, and makeup with micro-cleanse anti-bacterial formula. Pure Calamansi extracts known to whiten skin. It has vitamin C derivatives to help lighten dark spots in as early as 1 week for an even skin tone. | This product is classic and very effective that's why until now it's still here, unlike other brands being discontinued in the market. I have been using this since college, but later on this particular calamansi formula is more effective on me, while the other formula doesn't work on me. 

BUYING THESE PRODUCT SOON:

PROTECTION

Brand: COSRX

Aloe Soothing Sun Cream SPF50 PA+++

An aloe-infused moisturizing sunscreen for dehydrated skin. Protects skin from ultraviolet rays and other environmental damages with SPF50 PA+++ | I’m reading a lot of good reviews about this product, so I am adding this to my cart now hehe. 

EYE CREAM

Brand: NEUTROGENA

Rapid Wrinkle Repair Eye Cream

Help improve the signs of skin aging with Neutrogena Rapid Wrinkle Repair Eye Cream. Specially formulated for the delicate eye area, the fast-acting retinol cream helps fade the look of stubborn crow's feet, brightens and evens skin tone in the under-eye area, helps smooth fine lines and texture, and reduces the look of dark circles. This clinically proven retinol formula works quickly with visible results in just one week. | It says that this is the best eye cream for 2020 so let’s see if it’s going to work on my eyes hehe.

Whew! That was a lot of information. I hope you find this helpful and give your skin the love it deserves. If you have any questions or suggestion please don’t be afraid to say it to me. Til next time!

Love Lots,  Jamie  ♡

#beauty #skincare

[miumiu-chan]

Miyase Go STORY 1 Chapter 10-4

Subbed video: STORY-1 10-4

-Rulong’s Apartment-

[RULONG]: “Ohh, it’s about ready to drink.”

[RULONG]: “The fragrance is also good. Here, go ahead and have some.”

[REI]: “............”

[RULONG]: “Hm~m, Little Flower, you refused the water earlier too.”

[RULONG]: “If you stubbornly don’t take anything in, you’ll need an IV later?”

[REI]: “......Why aren’t you having some as well?”

There was only one cup. It could be poisoned.

[RULONG]: “There’s no poison in it, so don’t worry. I still don’t completely know what drugs are effective against Little Flower.”

[RULONG]: “And showing hospitality with tea is the manners of “Licorice”.”

[REI]: “Licorice......?”

[RULONG]: “It’s kanzō*.” (T/N: the Japanese word for licorice, because he says Licorice in English.)

I knew what it was. It was a plant often used in herbal medicine.

[RULONG]: “The leaves we used for the shag flavor earlier are also licorice.”

[REI]: “Shag......?”

[RULONG]: “The hand-rolled cigarette.”

That smell that was different from the aroma of the craft tea, I remembered it.

At the same time, remembering Miyase-san's coldness, I felt suffocated.

[RULONG]: “That shag is also made by my family.”

[RULONG]: “The previous generation who was also the founder was a really great merchant, you see.”

[RULONG]: “It was the first licorice-flavored shag ever invented, and that’s why it became the organization name.”

[RULONG]: “——so, since you’ve heard that much already, why not drink?”

[RULONG]: “Because from the point that you trust me and take the tea into your mouth, Little Flower will be semi-family.”

[REI]: “Semi-family......?”

[RULONG]: “Those that you can talk more about with than with other people, yeah?”

The temptation in the sweet scent was strong.

This person properly saw through my regret and inferiority.

For the DCD, my current self was nothing but a burden.

At the very least, I wanted to collect information.

[REI]: “......-, I will drink it now.”

[RULONG]: “Go ahe~ad ♪”

I didn’t really get the taste of the craft tea that was in my mouth.

I just felt the temperature on my tongue and swallowed mechanically.

[RULONG]: “Congrats. With this, Little Flower and I are no longer complete strangers.”

[RULONG]: “Do you want to ask anything?”

Rather than considering the intention of the induction, I chose the option to openly question him.

[REI]: “What do you intend to do with the flower drugs from now on?”

[RULONG]: “Ah, that? I can't answer that. Sorry.”

[RULONG]: “The only things I can tell you are personal things.”

[REI]: (Personal......)

[REI]: “......That Miyase-san is trying to crush the Kujo Family with you”

[REI]: “......Does he hold a grudge because of his mother’s suicide?”

[RULONG]: “Before answering, Little Flower has to present the information that you have.”

[REI]: “Miyase-san’s mother was confined by the Kujo Family's predecessor, and suffering from a mental illness chose to die——is what I know.”

[RULONG]: “Anything else?”

[REI]: “In the same year, the Kujo Family predecessor also died......”

[RULONG]: “That's right. Go-chan’s papa, committed suicide after Go-chan's mama.”

[REI]: “H......!”

[RULONG]: “Licorice, you know, doesn’t respect people who waste their own lives.”

[RULONG]: “Life is the biggest consumable, it’s the best product.”

[RULONG]: “That’s why, I’ll give a hint to Little Flower, who is trying hard to collect information without giving up on your attachment to living even in this situation.”

-Kujo House / Living Room-

[KUJO]: “——Go, is now a good time?”

With the news of my mother’s death, abandoning everything except breathing, I answered without looking at Soma-san.

[MIYASE]: “What is it......? Right now, I can’t talk about any decent things.”

[KUJO]: “Father died.”

What idiotic things are you saying, I ridiculed.

[MIYASE]: “The fake funeral is over already, isn’t it?”

[KUJO]: “He’s really dead.”

[MIYASE]: “........................Ha?”

An intense breathlessness hit me, as if my throat was clogged by the incense burner. I felt nauseous.

Unable to stand it, I lifted my face slowly and Soma-san was reflected in my sight.

He was also looking straight at me.

[KUJO]: “He seems to have been put together with Ryoko-san’s coffin.”

[KUJO]: “An excessive use of a drug was detected in the body.”

[KUJO]: “——It was the same illegal drug as Ryoko-san’s.”

The hairs on my whole body stood on end at once, and I tried to strongly hold down the vomit.

I couldn't vomit anything, because even the gastric juice had frozen in my empty organs.

[MIYASE]: “What are you saying……?”

[KUJO]: “Go, I——“

[MIYASE]: “Shut up.”

[KUJO]: “——“

[MIYASE]: “Soma-san......”

[MIYASE]: “...——When you said “I do not hold a grudge against you” to my mom, what did you mean?”

[KUJO]: “............”

[MIYASE]: “I am sure you said that to my mom yesterday.”

[MIYASE]: “I kept on thinking about what it meant.”

[KUJO]: “That was——“

[MIYASE]: “Were they words of sympathy towards a mistress?”

[KUJO]: “It’s not!”

[MIYASE]: “How is it not!”

I grabbed Soma-san's collar and pressed him against the wall with fury.

When I looked at his pained expression at a close distance, I calmed down a little.

[MIYASE]: “......Just now, you said “it’s not”, didn’t you.”

[KUJO]: “............”

[MIYASE]: “Please explain. So that I can understand.”

[KUJO]: “-............”

[MIYASE]: “Explain it! Nii-san*!!” (T/N: Big brother)

My grip tightened up on his collar.

Rather than pressing him, it was as if I was clinging on to him.

I hit his body against the wall. I glared one-sidedly.

Is this sibling interaction?

Because I didn’t know how to do something like depend on my brother.

[KUJO]: “......Go, I think of you as my brother.”

[MIYASE]: “——!”

Pulling away the hand that was touching, I staggered a step back, and distanced another step back.

There was no “explanation”.

This person admitted that he was insulting my mother's existence, while calling me his “brother”.

He went out of his way to say “You are not guilty”, and heavily pressed that blame onto my mother.

[MIYASE]: “You are......the same as Kujo Soichiro. With that arrogance.”

[MIYASE]: “——To the extent that it robs people of their lives.”

[KUJO]: “Nh......”

[MIYASE]: “You are———...er.”

[MIYASE]: “You are not my brother.”

-Rulong’s Apartment-

[REI]: “No way......-, is that really true?”

[RULONG]: “My family’s researcher is a perfectionist.”

[RULONG]: “Researching everything as detailed and obsessively as possible.”

[REI]: “Then......after all, Miyase-san holds a grudge against the Kujo Family because of his mother, and wants to take revenge……”

[RULONG]: “That’s what I thought. Go-chan too.”

You “thought”......?

[REI]: “Does that mean that the current perception is different?”

[RULONG]: “Little Flower should have understood it from the Hanafuda game earlier.”

[RULONG]: “In Go-chan’s case, not just the cards in his hand, even the set couldn’t properly be seen.”

[REI]: “......Even Rulong-san can’t see all of Miyase-san?”

[RULONG]: “I can't give you any more hints.”

[RULONG]: “Because I don’t trust Little Flower completely.”

[RULONG]: “Even if I said we’re family, it’s still semi.”

[REI]: “That there’s hints means that there is an answer after all.”

[RULONG]: “What do you think? I wonder if Little Flower can see through the meaning of the set that Go-chan made.”

[REI]: “If you know anything, please tell me now......!”

[RULONG]: “And what if I said I was involved in the death of Go-chan's mother?”

[REI]: “Eh......-“

[RULONG]: “But, we’re a family. A family*.” (T/N: he usually says family in English but the second one he said in Japanese, kazoku.)

[RULONG]: “And with that, the serious talk is over ♪”

[REI]: “——!”

Suddenly I was hugged tightly by the waist, and my neck was bitten sweetly.

[REI]: “H......! P-Please stop......!”

[RULONG]: “I~ don’t wanna.”

[RULONG]: “This flower tea, in my country you give it to a woman you want to sleep with.”

[RULONG]: “You feel down because of Go-chan’s coldness, right? I’ll comfort you.”

[REI]: “Wai-! Really st——“

[MIYASE]: “You promised not to touch the product.”

[REI]: (Miyase-san......!)

[RULONG]: “Ah, you’re back.”

[MIYASE]: “Rulong, let go.”

[RULONG]: “Why? Go-chan doesn't need Little Flower, right?”

[RULONG]: “A Japanese woman has a clean and good smell from her moist skin, it’s making me feel a special excitement.”

[REI]: “N-No......!”

The appearance of me being embraced by him was seen by Miyase-san.

Although I was desperately struggling, his restraint was skillful as if it wasn’t a big deal to him.

[RULONG]: “Even if you resist, I’ll still do it. It actually makes me burn more.”

[REI]: “!”

[MIYASE]: “............Do as you like.”

[REI]: (No way......!)

He left.

The closed door resonated with a dry sound.

The view of his back that disappeared was on the other side of it.

......This was the first time I saw Miyase-san's back so clearly.

We were always next to each other or talking face-to-face.

Such a person, now was——...

[RULONG]: “Hmm, will it take about 15 seconds?”

[REI]: “Eh......”

The sound that seemed to cancel my confusion was the sound of the door opening and closing fiercely——

[MIYASE]: “Rulong, if you wanted to uselessly stir me up, you’ve succeeded.”

[RULONG]: “A~ha. It hasn’t even been 10 seconds, Go-chan really is the best.”

Miyase-san, who had a smile like it was plastered on, approached me, 

And firmly pulled my arm so that I got up from the reluctant Rulong-san’s knees.

[RULONG]: “You should’ve just done that from the beginning. I’ll leave you two alone.”

Saying it as if he knew it all, he went out of the room.

-Rulong’s Apartment / Corridor-

[RULONG]: “Having Little Flower reach Go-chan’s set by herself is my reserved card.”

[RULONG]: “Xiao Go, I won’t lose*.” (T/N: He says this in Chinese. Xiao is like a term of endearment that just means “small” or “young.”)

#stand my heroes #sutamai #miyase go #translations

[phemonoi]

tarot cards as foster the people lyrics 🌿✨

*based on the waite tarot deck

I've wanted to do this to better understand the relation of the cards with one another and I thought it'd be a good idea to post it here!

i. aces, the magician & justice

—houdini

“rise above, gonna start the war!” / “well, and eye for an eye, and an ‘f’ for a fight” / “well, you got what you want and what you never knew, perfect gift from me to you” / “focus on your ability, then they can’t get what they want to steal”

the aces have an aura of beginning, the spark of an idea, oportunity, birth. however, the magician is the “trigger” of that change, he controls it, activates it. he’s the architect and alchemist that has the ability to make use of each suit as he pleases. with justice, as we see, this power comes with a responsability. you get back what you give. and because the magician is also an illusionist, a liar and a thief, justice needs to be there as a reminder of what happens when you abuse magic. 

ii. twos, high priestess & the hanged man

—shc

“you’re a secret, that’s worth keeping, and now i’m keeping my mouth shut” / “well, i’ve been sleeping waiting for something, but to feel nothing at all, avoid the call” / “when i’m alone, there’s a ghost the keeps talking, and i know there’s gotta be more, for sure”

the twos are a symbol of alchemy, and this can be clearly seen in the cups with the caduceus of hermes on the background. the high priestess is the master of occult knowledge, she channels cosmic knowledge through intuition, thus creating a bond, an exchange of energy within her and the universe. the hanged man needs meditation and contemplation in order to decide what’s next, what’s real from what’s an illusion. he urges stillness in order to recover, much like the two of swords.

iii. threes, the empress & death

—fire escape

“my spine is made of iron, my heart pumps out old red paint” / “I see the seasons change, all the young faces come and replace the dying ones” / “i’ve watched the dreamers find their legs, and i’ve seen the ones that come get reduced to bones and rags”

this procesion of cards illustrates the importance of cycles. the threes combine pain, sorrow (swords) with recovery, harmony (cups), planning (pentacles) with action (wands), conveying the message that one simply can’t exist without the other, for the presence of the other is what gives one its importance, its core definition. they’re light and shadow, much like birth (empress) and death. 

iv. fours, the emperor & temperance

—coming of age

“you know i try to live without regrets, i’m always moving forward and not looking back, but i tend to leave a trail of dead while moving ahead” / “just like an animal, i protect my pride, when i’m too bruised to fight, and even when i’m wrong i tend to think i’m right. well, i’m bored of the game, and too tired to rage”

the emperor is the giver of stability, as we can see in four of pentacles and four of wands. he provides a stable foundation to build a home, he’s a father. meanwhile, the four of cups and four of swords portray temperance; they’re about patience, balance, and meditation. the emperor, as a leader, needs to balance the responsability of his power out with temperance, or else he will become a tyrant, ruled by fire.

v. fives, the hierophant & the devil 

—pay the man

“say what you love, it’s alright don’t be afraid to find your light, embrace the day, at night we’re here to fight, we all go wild again” / “climbing up my own tree, hoping it can hold all the things i’ve seen but i’ve chosen to ignore. well, i said, well i believe i’ve been well fed but the wolf’s not dead” / “lift up your name, seasons change, you know that it'll never be the same, we'll see the sun again, and before it fades, i just wanna say that i love you”

this procesion is very deep. it speaks of the spirit on a level that no other procesion of cards does in the entire deck. because the hierophant is combined with the devil, i feel like it unites opposite religious concepts: heaven with hell, purity with dirt, wisdom with madness. this alchemy of the soul is pretty much a product of dionysos, and that’s why he’s often identified with both major arcanas. the fives, now, are the middle point of each suit; they mark a transcendental point in the path of the fool. they speak of poverty, sadness, confusion and conflict. this is the event that leads to the tower; the failure, the longing for illumination, the unmasking of the lies and illusions that have ruled one’s life until now. the unity of darkness and light, the highest power, thrice-born and divine, with the lowest impulses of nature, the satyrs and maenads that lure you into their orgy. the devil here demands to be payed back, he wants retribuition, while the hierophant presents himself as the saviour, the guide, that happens to also be incredibly biased. i think it’s very useful to view this procesion as a representation of dionysos, he who initiates us into the journey of self-discovery through mysteries and shadows. 

vi. sixes, the lovers & the tower 

—the truth

“well i’ve been trying to relearn my name, it feels like a thousand years that i’ve been out of frame and i surrender, the truth is what it’s what i’ve needed from you, cause i’ve been floating within your walls of opinion, and i’m tired. i only want the truth” / “a blinding call to prayer has touched my feet, like the call of the prophets, a purpose is needed before you know that you know, to never wonder what you are, and not forget where you’ve come from” / “is it really love you’ve been speaking of?”

the lovers and the tower have a closer relation than what i thought at first, and the verses of this song really show it. the lovers is, finally, the resolution of the devil and the hierophant: it is the unification of duality, the yin and yang, and its lust is still present in the devil; the impetus and dichotomy of human emotion. but the tower and the hierophant are both events of immense spiritual enlightment. they represent freedom. the sixes are about charity, change, escape, and victory. 

vii. sevens, the chariot & the star 

—doing it for the money

“just close your eyes, we’re gonna run this blind, we live our lives, we’re not wasting time, maybe we lost our minds, we’re gonna get what we can” / “i said it doesn’t matter where i go, i am calling all the poets into battle, i am shouting to the world let them know that we won’t be afraid to step into the fight when we can’t see the light” / “there’s no retreat and no escape if we keep dreaming while we’re wide awake”

dreams, hope, courage and art. this is a creative procesion of cards. after the breakdown of the sixth procesion, the seventh brings bravery forthward. there’s no time to waste and we’re now purified, convinced of our worth and what we need to do in order to achieve what is needed. we’ve accepted the situation, the nature of our uncontrolling emotions and the will of fate. the sevens take action, a bit impulsively, but still they trigger a necessary change after the depression seen with the lovers and the tower. 

viii. eights, strength & the moon

—a beginner’s guide to destroying the moon

“and now i’m staring at the moon wondering why the bottom fell out, been searching for answers and there’s questions i’ve found” / “we’ve been crying for a leader to speak like the old prophets, the blood of the forgotten wasn’t spilled without a purpose, or was it?” / “you’ll never be whole until you lose control, and think freely to smash the wall of apathy, stop your self-importance and lift the weight off somebody else”

there’s a very pretty picture on the eight of cups in the ethereal visions illuminated tarot deck, because the moon is full, shining enormously over a deep blue landscape, and that perfectly illustrates the relation of this card to the major arcana of the moon. this procesion for me is about confidence. change is never easy, even when we’ve finally surrendered to the fate of circumstances, even when we were the ones to trigger it. eight of swords and eight of cups are not easy cards to gaze at, but we must remember that the moon is a mother, it is nurturing, it reminds us of the quality of nature to be cyclical, that things are always moving and flowing, and emotions don’t last forever. it’s also a card of illusions; it yells at us to remove the blindfold from our eyes and rediscover our worth. strength is about taming the beast, keeping on working, effort and struggle. so this tells me; no matter how much it hurts, keep going, be a leader, be the lion, make the blood you shed worth it. 

xix. nines, the hermit & the sun

—pseudologia fantastica

“don’t be afraid of the knife, sometimes you gotta cut the limb to survive” / “you got to love the madness of the feeling, don’t have to rush the freshness of beginning, you got to get back up and face your demons, don’t ever be afraid of starting over”

the nines follow the archetype of the hermit and continue their path through the sun. when we’ve worked hard enough, when we’ve compromised to facing our shadow self, when we’ve retired to truly know ourselves, admiting what we’ve done, what we’re worth, and retreated into silence, then there’s a comeback filled with joy, music, light. the nine of swords is a necessary dark night of the soul leading to a definitive awakening. 

xx. the tens, wheel of fortune & judgement 

—iii

“and i wont be afraid, it’s true we’ll never know, when the night will come and take us home, and people change, we fade from youth, and evolve into eternal life” / “wake the sleeping from their dreaming, we all want more, we all want more saints will sing and hearts are beating, saying we all want more, we all want more”

there’s still much to learn in the ten of swords already, but because life is an ouroboros and our purpose is to return to having full control of all the suits and making use of that power faithfully and wisely, it doesn’t matter. in the tens, we admit that we can affect certain situations but there’s always something that escapes our sight; fortune acts alone. wheels turn again, endlessly, for eternity. we want more; the ten of cups portrays a couple with kids new life, new paths, a new story that is, again, yet to be unfold. ten of pentacles passes down its knowledge and experience to the youth; ten of wands continues with its struggle, in the conviction that the nine will come back. ten of swords, however, looks defeated. it ain’t. it’s finally the death of the past self. ten of swords is, actually, the scene of the moment the knight defeated his adversaries. it is a card of victory; but the knight is yet to become a king. 

#tarot #witchcraft #witch #tarot deck #tarot spread #spirituality #divination #neophyte #baby witch #magick

[littlemonstersau-blog]

The Feels Awaken, Part 3: A New Hope (for Friendship)

Written by @jkl-fff, illustrated by me

PART I - PART II [Interlude] - PART III - PART IV [Interlude] - PART V [FINAL] (you are here)

——————————————————————————————–

A new day dawned then waxed then began to wane, but Ford and Bill hardly noticed. A manic, obsessive energy (plus an unhealthy amount of coffee and sugar) kept them focused throughout their self-appointed task. Such is often the case for the kind of people who feel the need to write to right a wrong in the world. Not all heroes wear capes, after all; some wear turtlenecks and trenchcoats, some wear paper-based clones of teenage boys produced through unholy abominations of SCIENCE!.

… For that matter, not all heroes are particularly heroic; some are morally ambiguous straddlers of the line between antihero and antivillain, some are demonic chaos gods who (quite frankly) still wonder how in the 79 Hells they found themselves in this position.

In the end, though it did take more than the one night, they still finished in just over 16 hours. The plot outline came in at just over 18 pages, which they tidily stacked together on the table and declared to be more than adequate … before passing out on the carpet. Facefirst.

When Bill next regained consciousness, he was in his attic bed and morning light was streaming through the window. His mouth tasted like an abandoned prison for criminally insane chalk and his head felt like the internal turmoil of a buzzsaw having an existential crisis. It was a pain that was anything but hilarious; it was the sugared caffeine hangover equivalent of nuclear fallout … Mouthwash fixed the first problem. The second took an adult dosage of aspirin, a lot of water, and deliberate manipulation of many of the clonesuit’s normally automatic processes for a full eight minutes. And even then, not completely.

“Guess I can’t pilot one of these things through 36+ hours of no sleep on a gallon of coffee … Not if I wanna be able to still maneuver it the next day without crashing every ten feet into a wall or the floor, at least,” he grumbled to himself. “Major design flaw … Can’t believe they got evolutionarily approved for mass production with such weak durability …”

Downstairs in the kitchen, Stan greeted him jovially enough. “Stancakes are up, and so are you, it seems. How you feelin’ today?”

“Honestly, confused,” Bill graveled, his clonesuit throat still raw. “I can get longterm possession of a meatbag leading to me—y’know, the real me—developing emotions and physical cravings and other … gross, brain-mush junk like that. Neurochemistry is basically just an addictive habit, like how people respond to hearing the question ‘What is love?’—”

“Baby, don’t hurt me. Don’t hurt me no more,” Stan mumbled automatically.

“Exactly. But what I don’t get is why the real me is also feeling this coffee and sugar hangover. No joke: I tried leaving my clonesuit to get away from it, but it followed me. How is that fair? And, yeah, existence isn’t fair,” Bill interjected before Stan automatically could. “But still …”

Like the benevolent and experienced sage he was (more or less), Stan chuckled to himself. Then, laying a companionable arm around Bill’s shoulders, he leaned in and whispered the truth as grimly as Death itself, “You can outrun your sins, but you can never outrun a hangover.”

“W-wha?”

“Some say if you never stop drinkin’, it’ll never catch up with you. But they are fools. Sooner or later, all things must sleep—sooner or later, all who drink must suffer.”

“Uh … K-kinda freakin’ me out here.” Bill tried to lean away, but Stan’s hold was inescapable. “And, just sayin’, I’m kinda responsible for making most of the 79 Hells as freaky as they are.”

“Heed my warning, child.”

“I’m heeding! I’m heeding! Elder Gods, Stan, the only one who’s supposed to give people nightmares around here is me …”

Straightening up, Stan went back to the stove to continue what passed for cooking with him. “Once you’re done eatin’, by the way, I gotta plate for you to take down to Ford. He prob’ly needs some food and water more ‘n you do.”

Between mouthfuls of food, Bill said, “Yeah, sure … You seen what we wrote, by the way?”

“Yeah. It’s not bad at all. I’d def’nitely go see movies like that. Might even pay my own money for it, too. Heh … Even Soos admitted the storylines are better. Haven’t seen him that downcast ‘bout anything in a while, either. Looked as painful for him as cutting out his own kidney. Might have to do something nice for him soon just to make up for it,” Stan added to himself.

“Huh … Yeah, maybe …” Bill chewed on his breakfast, almost starting to maybe feel guilty. Then, when he finished, he put his dishes in the sink, picked up what was meant for Ford, and took it down to the lab.

Ford, as usual, was at his desk. He was hunched over with a pen, which was also fairly usual. However, and this was very unusual, all his notes and Journals had been pushed into a corner—neatly stacked, but well out of the way. Close to hand, as if for quick reference, was actually their Cosmos Conflicts storyline.

Bill cleared his throat. “Brought some breakfast for ya from Stan.” He set it on the desk, but away from any of the papers (just in case). “How you feeling? I woke up with a caffeine hangover I couldn’t escape even when I left my body. Er, clonsuit. Whatever. Same dif.”

“… I didn’t really sleep very deeply,” Ford eventually replied, his voice as hoarse as Bill’s. “Ergo, I can’t really say I woke up with such a hangover, but I’m suffering one all the same.”

“Yeesh, that sucks. Taken anything? Had some water and some food? That helped me.”

“Some water and aspirin, yes, though I’m not sure I could keep much food down … I suppose I ought to try, anyway.”

“If you feel more rotten than a two-week-old apple core, why are you working?” Bill asked, sliding the plate closer.

“I’m not really working, per se,” Ford answered guiltily. “Just … sketching. Some stuff. For what we came up with.”

Bill’s eyes lit up with interest. “Ooo! Really? Can I see? Please?”

For a moment, Ford’s jaw worked. As though trying to control himself.

“It’s okay,” Bill said hurriedly, though unable to fully contain his disappointment. “I get it. I’ll leave you al—”

A couple pages’ worth of images (some rough sketches, some little more than absent doodles, and some rather intricate and detailed) were thrust at the Demon. “Here. Can’t see any harm in you looking at them, anyway, so …” Ford mumbled. Without looking up, he cut in to his food. “Was just doing this since I’m too awake and restless to just not do anything, but too … wooly in the head, I suppose you could say, to do any productive work.”

Bill poured over them, delighting in the imaginative whimsy of them. Most were of characters from the prequels, though with distinctive touches—touches reflecting their own collaboration (such as Otherkin in a stained pilot’s attire, Imdolledupa aiming ruthlessly with a blaster, and Jelived Knights wearing a different style of clothing from Jelived Sentinels or Jelived Healers). But some were very different, especially among the doodles. “Ha! You made a Soos Wookie!”

Ford couldn’t resist smiling. “Soosbacca. Co-pilot to Stan Solo.”

“In their spaceship, the Mystery Falcon, right? Is Melody a Wookie, too?”

“Huh … That’s not a bad idea, actually. I was having a hard time seeing how to fit her in, since she isn’t really the Princess Leia type.”

“But Mabel and—pff!—Dipper are?” Bill snorted, pointing to where they were both sketched with the iconic braids wrapping around their ears. “Both of them together?”

“Well, they’re also both Luke, since I couldn’t really pick who fit which roll better.”

“Two sets of the twins running around, huh?” Bill murmured, though he was really thinking about two Dippers (and they weren’t running around, either—they were very much not running). “… And Wendy’s Lando, I see. Am I Yoda, since I’m the most triangular or everybody, and the right size?”

“Uh …” Ford hesitated.

“Pff, it’s alright, I can already see 3PO and R2 are both me.”

Lamely, the Weirdologist explained, “Because you’re shiny. That’s the extent of the logic.”

“You gonna do any more sketches?”

“Assuming I can keep breakfast down, probably,” Ford said around a mouthful. “It’s … distracting. And fun. And relaxing, too. Helps to pass the time on a down day like this.”

“Um … M-mind if I stay and watch? Please?” Bill almost begged. “Y’know how much I love watching you meatbags make art.”

“… Oh, fine,” Ford relented. Because what was the harm in being nice to the Demon? Ford didn’t have to trust him for that. “Just don’t make any noise. My head aches enough as it is.”

Bill mimed zipping his lips and throwing away the key before pulling up a chair and settling himself comfortably beside Ford. The only time he broke his silence after that was to ask Ford if he wanted more water, and to assert that the others would get a kick out of seeing these sketches (“especially Soos … the Twins, too, though we’d have to text ‘em a photo of ‘em, or mail the whole project to ‘em to see …”).

All in all, it turned out to be a rather nice day for both of them together.

#little monsters au #the feels awaken #bipper #stanford #bill cipher #writing #fanfiction #please excuse the dopey ass looking star wars sketches #also omfg this is finished finallyyyy #submission