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#i too am old and gay and can now say fuck!
lolotr · 6 months
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finally watching the new dan and phil games and it's chaotic and incredible
but i feel like someone who's been paying attention needs to update me on The Lore bc i haven't watched them probably since 2019
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emotinalsupportturtle · 4 months
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coming home for the holidays from university in your twenties (no family tragedy has taken place, yet) makes me feel like I finally understand what Hamlet was actually on about
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#have been an anxious lil piece of shit since my mother walked past/then in my room bc she smelled something-#this was yesterday btw .. first thing she said was 'u dont vape do u?' and i was like 'no' *queue john mulaney voice: like a liar*#ok well technically only on occasion like if i dont have w**d#anyway she steps into my room and starts fuckin sniffing around and goes 'it smells like .. weed 😐' and just looked at me and guys ..#i am the WORST but my mothers brother aka my gay uncle got kicked out when they were younger bc he smoked too and my mother has grown to#not be fond of it since . so BASICALLY i lightly gaslit her and was like 'mom. seriously ? 🙄'#bc we joke about it on occasion like she went to denver and came back with a fuckin pot that says 'a little pot from colorado' meant for#weed and in my head im like 😭 bro i could actually use this 😭#so thats how we joke but obviously for me its genuinely funny bc of the irony but anyway .#my anxiety was so high after that bc i literally had my pen on me and i just left the situation and started petting my dog and filled up my#waterbottle trying to think of what the fuck i was going to do next but that was literally the end of that#(at least for now but i dont even want to jinx it)#to be proactive tho bc newsflash i do smoke! i got smart as shit and wrapped my smell proof combo bag to make it look like a gift for my#my friends when i go back to school so she wont think anything of it#and then put my pen old battery and vape in a box hidden away so i can still access them if i need but god DAMN#i was def just being stupid tho bc i forget when im at home i cant be so lax and rip the shit out of my pen with my door closed and no fan#anymore like 😐 u dumb fuck i was smarter at 16 with this shit#anyway. its definitely on me and im just mad at myself for it and hope it doesnt come up again/that she isnt overly paranoid with me like i#am with myself rn#also just for some more background my mom and i have never been super close but im really close with my dad but i love with my mom ? so#after this semester not just bc of this situation but i might be like. ive never had a room at dads and id like to at least for summer#and go from there. they just moved and its so cozy and id love to make my room mine over there for once even if it means moving in for abit#but the one thing that would absolutely break my heart is that my dog lives with my mom and its not like i couldnt still see her but i feel#like id feel guilty/like im abandoning her or something :'(#idk if anyone read this far pls lmk ur thoughts#oh and i work right by my moms so its not like i couldnt still visit her but it would break my heart#kylas thoughts#drugs /
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marriedtobigfoot · 8 months
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Steve ends up heartbroken, lonely and depressed after season 2. Nancy called him bullshit, even after he ditched all his old friends for her. Billy Hargrove took his spot at the top of the food chain. He can have it, Steve doesn't really want it anymore. But Steve does want to find some sort of connection. Someone to have in his life who isn't an 11 year old kid he barely knows. He tries to go on a date one night, take a nice-seeming girl to a party. He wants to find connection, to kill the loneliness that's been building for months, but just as he's feeling kind of good about things, his date ditches him.
So. He decides to drink his feelings. He gets majorly fucked up, and ends up laying on the ground in the backyard, contemplating how much life seems to hate him.
Only to literally get tripped over by Eddie Munson, who was at this party selling pot and is very confused as to why Steve Harrington is alone on the ground with a bottle of vodka clenched in one hand.
Eddie ends up chatting a little with Steve, nothing substantial, but enough to know that Steve is very very drunk, and also very very sad.
He asks if Steve wants to go back to the party, and Steve staunchly refuses. He doesn't want to be around a bunch of annoyingly happy people.
He asks if Steve needs a ride home, and Steve just kind of shrugs. His parents just left for another trip, so home is kind of depressing right now too. But he doesn't exactly have any other friends he can stay with so. Home it'll have to be.
Only Eddie can *tell* he doesn't really want to go home, though he has no idea why Steve wouldn't want to return to his veritable mansion after a shitty night. The reason doesn't matter much. He offers to let Steve crash at his place. Steve can take the couch, or hell he can stay in Eddie's room if he doesn't mind sharing, that way he wouldn't risk being woken up when Wayne comes home that morning.
And well, Steve agrees. Can't think of any reason not too. Munson has been nice so far, he's got a good easy-going energy that Steve likes. Why not stay the night.
By the time they get to Eddie's, Steve is *slightly* more sober. Not much, but he's slurring his words a little less, and he can walk with only a little help.
Eddie grabs them each a little plate of leftovers, because he has no idea if Steve's eaten at all. It's quiet while they eat, Eddie doesn't push Steve to talk, and Steve isn't sure what to say. Eventually Eddie sets the plates aside and give Steve an easy grin.
"So, do you want the couch, or are you crashing with me?"
Steve thinks about it for a while. He hasn't shared a bed with a guy-friend since he was a kid, and he's heard rumors about Eddie, whispers in the hall about the way he looks at other guys. But...Steve can't really bring himself to care. He's tired, and he really doesn't want to be alone.
"I don't mind sharing."
Eddie sets them both up in his room, letting Steve choose which side of the bed he wants, and they both settle in. There's a respectable distance between the two of them, and Eddie says a quick goodnight to Steve, figures they won't talk and just go right to bed.
Except Steve isn't sober, and he really isn't in a good headspace, so he can't stop himself from blurting things out into the quiet of the dark room.
"Are you really gay?"
Eddie stiffens next to him, he can feel it, he can hear the way that the other boys breath cuts off and he seems to stop breathing all-together.
"It's okay if you are, I'm not going to be an asshole about it, I'm trying not to be that guy anymore. I guess I was just curious."
It's quiet for another beat before Eddie seems to loosen just a little. He starts breathing again at least.
"Yeah I uh- I am. Gay. And if that's weird the couch is still open, I can-"
"It's not weird."
"Okay."
Steve let's himself mull over this confirmation, and then his mouth starts moving again, without his permission.
"Is it lonely? Cause I mean, it's got to be hard to date in Hawkins. People here are shitty. Unless you've got like, a secret boyfriend or something."
"No...no secret boyfriend. It does get a little lonely sometimes. I'm lucky though, I've got my uncle, and my friends are pretty great. That's enough most days."
"What do you do when it's not enough?"
"Hmmm?"
"When your uncle and friends aren't enough, what do you do? To try and...make it better?"
Eddie is quiet again for a long stretch before he shrugs.
"I try to focus on something else. I'll play my guitar or work on a new campaign, read a book. Something to take my mind off it."
"Oh."
Now Steve is the one who seems tense, his jaw is tight and he's got his arms wrapped around himself. His next words come out as a whisper, but Eddie manages to catch them.
"I don't know how to do any of that."
He sounds almost choked, and Eddie is caught off guard. He's never seen Steve Harrington as anything other than solid, as happy. He's the king, after all. He's supposed to be all smiles and great hair. Only...Eddie's noticed that he hasn't hung out with his old friends lately, that he's eaten alone at lunch too many times to be anything other than strange.
"Steve...are you lonely?"
Eddie expects a denial, for Steve to laugh it off and tell Eddie that he's perfectly fine and fulfilled. Or maybe he expects a shrug, a non-answer. What he doesn't expect is the gut-wrenching sob that seems to tear past the other boys lips.
He doesn't expect to turn and see Steve Harrington's face, a scant foot from his, shining with tears.
He panics a little at the sight.
"Fuck- I'm so sorry-"
"Don't be." Steve tries to wipe his eyes, to hide the tremble in his voice. "Not your fault there's something wrong with me."
"What do you mean?"
"It's like I'm broken man, like nobody can stand to be around me. Tommy and Carol hate me now, Nancy- hell even my own parents hate being at home with me for more than a week. It's like I'm repellent or something. Couldn't even get a date to stick around for a whole night."
And Eddie's pretty sure *he* might start crying now. He'd never have expected this much from Steve, all that sadness to come pouring out. It wouldn't have happened if Steve was completely sober. Without thinking, he reaches out.
Eddie puts a hand on Steve's shoulder and waits to see if the touch gets rejected, but Steve seems to lean into him, so he lets his hand linger.
"This probably won't help, but I don't think you're repellent. And that's coming from somebody who your whole group used to torture. I don't know much about you, but I kind of liked having you around tonight."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
Steve gives him a tiny smile. His eyes are still wet with tears, and the smile doesn't come close to reaching them. He seems impossibly small here in Eddie's bed.
"I don't know man. I just wish-"
He cuts himself off, apparently deciding his words are too far, but Eddie urges him to keep talking.
"What do you wish Steve?"
"I just wish that... there was somebody out there I could have a future with. Somebody who actually loved me, you know?"
It might be the saddest thing Eddie's ever heard, and he blames that fact for what he does next.
He takes his hand off Steve's shoulders and instead hauls Steve closer to him, fitting the other boy against his chest and wrapping his arms around him. It's a move that might get him decked, but he doesn't think it will. And he'll be damned if he doesn't hug Steve right that second.
He doesn't get hit. Steve tenses for a second, but it's just that one instant before he's melting into the embrace.
Eddie feels more tears falling against his shirt, and he couldn't care less. He keeps Steve close, let's him cry into his chest, runs a hand through that famous mop of hair.
He isn't sure how long it takes for Steve to calm down, but eventually he does. His breathing evens out, and he shivers a little before speaking.
"Thanks man."
And Eddie takes another leap of faith.
"I could be that person, you know."
"What?"
"I mean. You know Im... not straight. It may not be exactly what you're wanting but. I think I could picture a future with you. If you want to, just for tonight...I could be that someone who loves you."
Steve looks at Eddie, like he's a puzzle that he needs to solve, before a other shiver seems to wrack his body.
"Just for tonight?"
It comes out as a whisper, but Eddie hears it all the same.
"Yeah. For tonight Steve."
"I think...I think I'd like that."
Eddie gives him the sweetest smile he can muster, and nods.
"Alright sweetheart."
Eddie isn't exactly sure what it means, to love Steve for the night. After all, Steve is straight. He figures it doesn't matter much though, it's only for a night.
He keeps a hold on Steve, let's him get comfortable tucked against Eddie, and he does what feels natural. He runs a hand up and down Steve's spine, traces shapes into the soft fabric of his shirt. He tangles their legs together, and in a moment of insane bravery he presses a kiss to the top of Steve's head.
He's met with a sigh, full of relief, and figures he's on the right track.
"Just close your eyes Stevie, I've got you."
"Can you tell me about it?"
"Hmmm?"
"The future. You said you could see one. Can you tell me?"
And he asks so carefully, he sounds almost afraid, Eddie can't say no to that.
"Do you want the fantasy future, or the realistic future?"
"The real one."
"Alright then. Well, if I'm not going to be a rich and famous rockstar...I'll probably graduate and get a job somewhere in town. A real job, maybe working on cars or something. I'm good with cars. You'd come over all the time, have dinners with me and with Wayne. You'd have to meet Wayne. And we'd have more nights like this, sleeping close."
Steve let's out a pleased sounding hum, and shifts his face so it's buried even closer in Eddie's neck. He can feel Steve's breath on him.
"We could save up money and get a little place together, somewhere outside Hawkins. I have to stay kind of close, for my uncle, but maybe Indy?"
Steve nods, mutters something about staying close 'just in case'. He sounds like he might fall asleep, so Eddie keeps going.
"We could get an apartment, nothing too fancy. We would get two rooms, so nobody gets suspicious, but we would share a bed most nights. I'd play with my band on weekends, just for fun, and you'd join some little local sports team. I'd make sure to schedule DND nights so that I never miss a single game, even though I don't understand a damn thing about sports. We would come home for holidays, but most of the time it would just be us. I'd take good care of you, make sure you never go more than a few hours without me telling you I love you. I'll show up wherever you're working just to give you a hug and a kiss, and make sure you don't forget it. And I'll annoy the hell out of, but you won't mind too much, because I'll make you happy too."
Eddie can think of more. He can think about so many things. How he could give Steve one of his rings, even if they couldn't legally get married, even if Steve would never want that. Just as another reminder that he's loved. They could take trips together and go out to parties where Steve will never have to worry about getting ditched. Eddie doesn't do things halfway, and he has a hell of an imagination. He could picture them growing old together, if he tried, if he let himself. But this is just for tonight, so he doesn't. Instead he runs a hand through Steve's hair again, and listens to his quiet breathing. He thinks he may have fallen asleep, but he's wrong.
"That sounds nice."
It comes out muffled, spoken into Eddie's neck, but he manages to make it out, and he let's the vibration of it sink into his skin.
*It's only for tonight.*
He has to remind himself, because Steve is just feeling lonely. He doesn't want that future with Eddie, he just wants to feel loved.
But even if it's just pretend, just to help Steve for a few hours, he's okay with that.
Steve may think he's broken, but Eddie thinks he would be easy to love for a long time. Loving him for one night is nothing. He doesn't even have to try.
Tomorrow Steve will wake up sober, and he'll thank Eddie for letting him stay over, and they won't talk about it. Eddie will drive Steve back to his car in silence, and they'll say their goodbyes. They may not talk ever again, they never had before.
But for tonight? Eddie Munson will love Steve Harrington, and Steve? He'll let himself be loved, let himself beleive it. And he'll love Eddie right back.
Just for one night.
And if Steve ever needs it again? Eddie will love him for another night. And Steve will give that love right back. He's got plenty to spare, after all. And there's far worse people he could share it with.
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penny00dreadful · 6 months
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STWG Prompt: I can explain!
Eddie had just barely pushed his own bedroom door open before everyone, including him, was shouting and he clapped a hand over his eyes.
“I didn’t see anything!”
“You better not have!” Robin shouted at him and he could hear her pulling her shirt back down from where she just had it held up to her chin.
“It’s not what it looks like!” Steve’s voice came out as more of a high pitched shriek rather than how it usually sounded.
“Okay, because it looks like you were feeling up Robin’s boobies.”
“You said you didn’t see anything!” Something bumped against his forehead and based on the softness of the fabric and the smell, he guessed it was probably one of Steve’s polos snatched up from the nearby hamper.
“This is my bedroom! Sorry I don’t walk into my own bedroom expecting random naked women!”
“I can explain!” Steve’s voice sounded closer now and Eddie automatically reached his free hand out blindly for him.
“Excuse you, I am not a random woman! And I am not naked nor was I naked, I was just kinda topless!” Robin huffed. “And this is Steve’s room too!”
When his hand finally landed on Steve’s arm, he felt his way down towards his hand, lacing their fingers together.
“Okay, then. Let me rephrase. Sorry I don’t walk into our bedroom-” he gave Steve’s hand an exaggerated shake, “-expecting to see you topless!”
Steve squeezed his hand back. “She said her boobies felt weird.”
“Have those boobies been put away?”
Robin made a disgusted noise. “Can you two stop saying ‘boobies’? What are you, twelve fucking years old?”
“Her boobies have been put away.” Steve snickered to himself, recoiling with a hissed ow when Robin slapped him across the arm.
Eddie had to blink a few times to get his eyes to adjust back to the light in the room but when he did, he found Robin thankfully fully clothed.
“Uh,” Steve shuffled a little on his feet. “Just so we’re clear, I’m not cheating on you with Robin.”
“Obviously.” Eddie pulled him closer, tucking his hand into Steve’s back pocket and giving him a little squeeze. “You’re not the cheating type and she’s as gay as Christmas.”
Robin glared at him with her hands on her hips. “I’m Jewish.”
“Gay as Hanukkah, then. Are your boobies okay?”
Robin glared at him again but shifted her eyes over to look at Steve.
“Everything seems fine, Birdie. Same as I told you this time last month. And-”
“And the month before that, yeah, yeah. I know.” She sulked, staring at the two of them for a moment before asking, “Do you have any vanilla ice-cream? And some sprinkles?”
Brought to you by my own monthly woes
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ellieluvr420 · 3 months
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Friends? Never. Pt.1 (Ellie Williams x reader)
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SYNOPSIS: You and Ellie had been bitter enemies for years now but before that you were best friends. You had always planned to be roommates one day but when that becomes a reality the situation isn't exactly how you both imagined it.
New fic alert? Can you tell I've got a thing for the enemies to lovers trope? Sorryyyyyy. I have loads of ideas for so many stories but this one made me too excited :D I can’t tell if the writing in this is ass but i’m just setting things up hold out hope for me people…
"You've got to be fucking kidding me." Ellie opens the door of her new home only to see you, her least favourite person in Jackson, standing at her door with your suitcase in hand.
"No no no no no no no." You say as you immediately start walking away from her. You keep walking until you see Maria walking towards you.
"Don't even start-" She already knows what you're going to say.
"I am not fucking living with her Maria."
"Didn't I tell you not to start? You're wasting your breath anyway, this is the only way we can accommodate all the new arrivals."
"Why do you hate me?" You groan and she spins you around immediately marching you back to your new home.
"I don't, but you and Ellie are a pain in my ass, maybe make the most of it and try and get along hm?" She keeps you held firmly at the front door as she knocks three times.
"Back for more alrea-" Ellie pauses as she sees Maria standing there with a stern look on her face, she pushes you through the door and smiles.
"Enjoy setting up!" She calls over her shoulder and you're sure you hear her laugh.
"Fuck my life." You push past Ellie, bumping her hard enough that she stumbles slightly. You storm off upstairs to find your room huffing at your new reality.
You're unpacking all your belongings when you notice her standing in the doorway, leaning against the doorframe. "Are you just gonna keep staring at me like a creep?"
"Are you gay?"
"Pardon?" You scoff at her bluntness but your heart was beating a mile a minute, you knew it wasn't a big deal, she's a lesbian herself, but for some reason you still found coming out to people so difficult. Your parents hadn't taken it well which is how you found yourself living on your own... well, with Ellie. You breathe in and regain your composure, turning to her and flashing a coy smirk. "Why do you want to know Williams? Got a little crush on me?"
"Ha! You wish. Just wondered seeing as you're nineteen and have never once even held a guys hand."
"Didn't realise you paid so much attention to me, should I be worried I have a stalker?" She rolls her eyes at you obviously avoiding her question. "Why does it matter?"
"It doesn't, just trying to figure out if I should be worried about you getting a crush on me and going all crazy."
You walk over to her until there's only inches between you. "You're so arrogant." You bump her in the shoulder and she stumbles as you walk past her towards the kitchen. "You're also not my type... at all." You call over her shoulder missing the look of bewilderment on her face.
"Wait... so you are?" Ellie calls as she follows you to the kitchen. She's close behind you as you march away until you stop dead in your tracks causing her to bump into you.
"If you must know Ellie, yes I am."
"Oh." Ellie felt her heart clench a little for you as she knows how unaccepting your parents are, that's why you stopped being friends all those years ago after all.
You had met Ellie on the first day she arrived in Jackson, she looked tired and a little gaunt but you still felt butterflies in your stomach when you laid eyes on her for the first time. You remember seeing her walk in and hand a gun she kept in the back of her jeans to Maria, you were gobsmacked because she looked the same age as you and you couldn't imagine holding, let alone using, a gun. You had been born in Jackson, only ever leaving to go on patrol in the last couple years so 14 year old you found the girl all the more intriguing. You had watched her from a distance as Joel spoke to your dad, you still remember the feeling of your stomach dropping when she looked up to see you spying on her. You hadn't spoken to her until later that evening when Joel and her had come to yours for dinner. It was awkward at first but when she saw your record player and limited vinyl collection, the ice thawed quickly, you became inseparable until your parents started taking an issue with your friendship with her, you never understood why they stopped you seeing her and stopped seeing Joel until two years ago when you told them you were a lesbian. Ellie had always known that they were homophobic but it still hurt when they stopped you seeing her, she saw red any time she was near you because she was so hurt that you could cut her out of your life just like that and within a couple months you were bitter rivals that couldn't share a nice word with the other. Her hatred for you was so overwhelming that it forced her to stop being so awkward around people because she was so focused on throwing as many insults your way as possible that her nerves when speaking to others dissipated.
Now, as you stand in the kitchen staring at her leaning on the doorframe you felt a pang of guilt for how you had treated her although it quickly disappeared the second she opened her beautiful mouth.
"Well er... you're not my type either so don't get any ideas." You laugh at the awkwardness of her statement knowing why she suddenly lost confidence in herself.
"Thanks for the clarification." You roll your eyes before busying yourself getting a glass of water, it was the middle of summer so all the moving and unpacking was making you feel severely dehydrated. Ellie watched as you gulped down the water, noting how a couple drops fall down onto your white tank top. She dragged her eyes away from you and cleared her throat.
"Well now we've established the feelings mutual we can go back to never speaking again. Or are you going to bother me constantly with small talk?"
"Oh believe me you have nothing to worry about on my end." You refill the glass again and walk over to her. "And if I'm remembering correctly you're the one that came and spoke to me, so I could ask you the same thing, no?" You jab a finger into her chest as you speak emphasising your point. "Now if you'll excuse me I need to go wash this finger of your germs and finish unpacking." You push past her once again and she scoffs as you walk away back upstairs without looking back at her.
You continue unpacking methodically until everything is put away neatly and your decorations are in their new designated homes. As you collapse onto the bed picking up the book you were reading at the moment from your bedside table you breathe a sigh of relief at the breeze making its way through your open window. Your shared cabin was right on the outskirts of Jackson so your view was the beautiful woods that lined the north west section of the wall, as you looked at the greenery that was reflecting glittering spots of sunlight you reminisced on the times you and Ellie had spent in the woods when you were friends. You're interrupted from your thoughts by the growling of your stomach that prompts you to sneak back to the kitchen.
"Fuck's sake." You mutter under your breath as you walk into the kitchen only to be greeted by Ellie leaning on the counter savaging a bowl of cereal.
"You know you're spilling more of that down your shirt than you're getting in your mouth right?" Ellie looks down at her t-shirt only to see that you were correct when you said she was spilling milk down herself, she huffs and continues eating, this time being more careful as she brings the bowl right to her mouth.
"I thought I made it clear I didn't want to talk to you and yet... here you are talking to me." She mumbles through a mouthful of cereal. You roll your eyes and open the fridge only to see the leftovers you had put in there earlier were gone. You take a deep breath before spinning to give Ellie the dirtiest of looks.
"Are you fucking kidding me? That's the only food I had until I go out tomorrow. Why would you eat it?"
"Oh was that yours? My bad I got hungry earlier, it was really good though you gotta make me some more of that sometime." She smiles sweetly and your face twists into a scowl as you feel the rage boiling inside of you.
"Only we live here Ellie, if you're going to steal my food you could at least own it." You walk away and just before you leave the kitchen empty handed you turn back slightly. "Pussy." You go to walk away until you feel a hand enclose around your arm yanking you backwards. She pushes you up against the wall and leans her body weight on you so you can't move, relishing in your struggle.
"Say that again bitch, I dare you." Her eyes are dark and cold only mirroring yours, a devilish grin appears on your face as you lean in closer to her.
"You're a pussy Williams... and you don't scare me." You push her off with all your strength and rush away from her before slamming your door so hard you're shocked it doesn't come off the hinges. You pace around your room muttering and cursing Ellie before you stop, realising you actually have to live with her for the foreseeable future, every time you looked at her all you could think of is the screaming matches you endured with your parents when they banned you from seeing her and the look of defeat on her face as you ignored her for the first time when she came over to you while you were out with your parents, the nausea you were feeling only grew as the memory of when you came out to your parents flashes through your mind as it does multiple times throughout the day. You grab your book and begin reading once again trying to rid yourself of all these memories that Ellie was bringing up. As you finally feel the nausea calming there are three forceful knocks on your door that you ignore reflexively.
"You gonna open the door or what?" Ellie's voice is muffled but clear enough to make out what she's saying.
"No. Fuck off Ellie!" Ellie rolls her eyes before knocking harder this time and she doesn't stop, she continuously bangs on your door until you throw your book down in frustration to storm over to the source of your irritation. As you yank the door open you're greeted by a smirking Ellie. "WHAT? What could you possibly want? You eat my food, you piss me off, you pin me against a fucking wall, what do you want now Ellie?"
Ellie is taken aback by your harsh tone, typically it had a hint of playfulness to it but now you just sounded angry. She gulped before regaining her standoffish demeanour. "Calm down sweetie."
You scoff and go to slam the door in her face but her hand stops you and pushes the door back so hard you stumble backwards with it, you huff and walk away dropping down onto your bed once again.
"Can I come in?"
"Sure whatever. You're gonna do what you want anyway." She stuffs her hands into her front pockets and walks in as she looks at all the decorations in your room before plopping down on your bed sitting directly on your feet. You snatch them away with a huff as you grit your teeth and curl up to put as much distance between you two.
"What... do you want Williams?"
"Nothing really. Just wanted to see your room. It's very... you."
"Mm and I'm sure yours looks like a squatters pit." You smile smugly at her as she rolls her eyes, your face drops as she turns and eyes the book on your bedside table with a smirk.
"You read romance?" She stifles a laugh poorly.
"Yes and what? Can you even read?" She chuckles and you mumble under your breath "idiot"
"Wow you really are a virgin aren't you?" You eyes flash up at her as your eyebrows knit together and your face turns to a grimace.
"Why do you assume I'm a virgin because I read romance? Maybe I just enjoy it."
"Ha! Right. I'm assuming you're a virgin because only virgins read romance books." You kick at her and she grabs your sock-covered foot stopping you in your tracks.
"Oh my god Ellie can you go away!"
"No no, not just yet. My curiosity is piqued about this book now." Before you can stop her she's reaching for the book and standing up while flicking through some pages.
"Wait, No Ellie don't." She holds it above your head as you stand, you try and snatch it from her once but it's too far out of your reach, panic takes over as she opens it above her head and begins reading aloud. "Ellie fucking stop!"
"Why? It's just a romance book right? Nothing too... inappropriate." Your cheeks heat and the familiar rage comes back in full force, you look down at her feet and stomp on the left one as hard as you can, she yelps and drops her arms which allows you to grab the book from her grasp and you immediately rush out of your room and into the bathroom, locking the door behind you with a triumphant smile.
"Ow you bitch!" You hear Ellie call after you. As you eye the bathtub you decide now is the perfect time to relax in the tub so you can escape Ellie for awhile and read your book in peace.
You stay in the bath until the sun has completely set and the room is bathed in a silvery glow from the moonlight, you guess you were in there for at least an hour but as you start to shiver from the cooling water you decide to finally leave your refuge. As you climb out of the bath you're horrified when you realise your towel is still in your room.
"Fuck fuck fuck." You had to walk past Ellie's room to get to yours but ultimately you decide you'd have to risk it, you unlock the door and peak out into the hallway to see its empty, you edge the door open and begin quickly creeping to your room, you're almost there but as you go to walk past Ellie's room she walks out at the exact same time walking straight into your naked form.
"AGH OH MY GOD!" Your hands immediately attempt to cover your dignity but its an almost failed attempt as you notice her looking you up and down. "DON'T FUCKING LOOK!" You scream as you run past her to your room so quickly your feet slip a little. You hear her cackling in the hallway as you lean with your back against the door in utter disbelief. "No no noooo that did not just happen." You mumble to yourself as you run a hand over your face.
You try to put the embarrassment past you as you settle into bed before passing out from the sheer exhaustion of the day.
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AITA for making a joke about my sex life to a student? 😏🐓 Nsfw text obv i know the title sounds bad but please read everything
I (Transmasc, 25) work on a school, very open as being gay, pride pins and it all, not as a teacher but I take care of computers, textbooks and the library. The younger folk seem to like me, but it's in high school folks things get ugly. Most just don't care about me, which I can't judge, being a teen sucks. Some hate me for telling them to go back to class. The ones that like me (mostly queer/autistic folk) like me for real.
There's this one boy (he's either 16 or 17 so he's NOT a kid) that always makes fun of me, is always skipping classes, is mean to everyone, implied a old teacher she should be better off dead, bothers everyone, talk loudly and complains about everything on his sight.
And he is. Very bigoted. I saw him more than once hurting the girls he studies with (slapping/punching) and caling the whores and more, telling them to suck him off, ride his dick, gag on his cock, etc, saying very hurtful things on gay men/anyone he deemed gay, and principal can only call his parents so many times before the parents stop showing and taking the concerns seriously. This is an ongoing issue since 6th grade, as far as I know. He hates my guts since I've called the principal on him more than once for going off on me telling me to fuck myself for asking him to go back to class.
My main strategy with him is ignoring him and the second one is answering as I don't understand him. Perks of being autistic I guess, being able to do this with a straight face. So: he calls me a chicken, I tell him they're my favorite farm animal, how did he guess? They're so amazing and cute. He tells me the lunch is gross, I say they can buy their lunch to bring if they want to, school food isn't that good (not true, the school food is amazing. Most students eat more than one plate). The computers are too slow, I ask him to please be patient cause they're old men that don't like to work, be nice to them :(. Guy says that the classes sucks, I tell him that the complaint box is at (governor's address) but yea they suck but at least he has only one year left.
This is where I might be the asshole, because I hurt myself going up and down a chair to organize some textbooks and I already have severe hip/knee pain so this only made me hurt worse so I am already pretty grumpy. A teacher asks for a banner of a periodic table and I have to find the table and go up a chair to hang it, and in the process, I let out a moan of pain becaude my knees dream of my downfall, and the teacher asks me if I am okay, so I tell yea, my hips and knees just hurt like a bitch. And this one student tells me "why, are you beaten up from taking cock in your ass?" And I breath deeply and answer "If it was from fucking I would be damn happy, but it's only from working. Anyways teacher here you go (with the periodic table)" and the teacher looks me with a surprised expression and all the class is silent and uncomfortable so I just left. Now the student can't look in my eyes but at least they're not talking to me anymore and the teacher hasn't said anything. AITA?
What are these acronyms?
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solarmorrigan · 1 year
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( @nitro502-the-sequel​‘s tags on this post made me ugly laugh and then I had to write something, I hope that’s okay??)
Wait, no, this is hilarious, hold on
Steve drops Eddie off at home later that night, where Wayne is awake and puttering around in the kitchen making what might possibly be lunch (he tends to keep overnight hours even on his days off, so as not to completely fuck his sleep schedule, but hell if Eddie can keep track of what time of “day” it is for him).
Wayne gives Eddie a nod of acknowledgement and turns back to the pan he’s stirring on the stove. “How was your–”
“HE CROCHETED ME A SCARF.”
This was a little louder than Eddie had meant to be, but Wayne, to his credit, doesn’t even flinch. He turns back to look at where Eddie is standing in the middle of the living area, clutching the ends of the aforementioned scarf like it’s a towel at the end of the world.
“Who did?”
“Steve.”
“Huh,” is all Wayne says. “Is crocheting the thing with the…?” He holds his fists out in front of him, rotating them at the wrists like he’s rowing a very tiny boat.
“No, that’s knitting. Apparently, they’re different,” Eddie says, brows raised and hands held up in front of him, like he can fend off the ghost of Steve’s surprisingly enthusiastic lecture on the subject. “Crocheting is with a hook, like–” Eddie holds out one curled fist, trying to demonstrate, but it mostly just looks like he’s either stabbing something or failing to pick up some invisible spaghetti. He gives up and flutters his hands in front of himself, clearing the image. “He showed me – never mind, it’s – you’re missing the point!”
“And I’m sure you’re gonna tell me what that is,” Wayne says, turning back to the stove before the beans (Eddie’s pretty sure it’s beans he’s smelling) start to burn.
“Steve crocheted me a scarf,” Eddie enunciates, because putting the proper emphasis on certain words will definitely solve the problem.
Wayne just hums. “Well, that was nice of him. Lord knows I can never get you to wear anything warm.”
Eddie groans, clutching at this scalp and then running his hands through his hair. He’s at least seventy-five percent certain Wayne is being obtuse on purpose.
“But what am I supposed to do about it?” he laments.
“Wear it, I’d say,” Wayne replies. “Can I see it?”
Eddie hesitates for a second, because it’s his scarf and Steve made it for him, and he doesn’t want anything to happen to it when he hasn’t even had it for twenty-four hours, but then he decides he’s being ridiculous, because if he can trust anyone with his stuff, it’s Wayne. He unwinds the scarf from around his neck and passes it over.
Wayne’s brows go up as he looks over the close, even stitches, running his fingers over the little ridges Steve somehow made with yarn. He nods appraisingly. “It’s nice,” he says, handing it back.
“Right?” Eddie tosses it back around his neck with a sigh.
“Did you say thank you?”
“Yes,” Eddie says, before thinking back over the moment when Steve had told him that the scarf was for him. “…more or less.”
Wayne shakes his head, turning back to his food with some unfavorable mutter about Eddie’s manners.
“Okay, but I think you’re still not seeing the problem here,” Eddie insists.
“Looks like the problem is that you’re having a conniption over a scarf in the middle of the damn living room,” Wayne shoots back.
“No, that’s– well I mean– no,” Eddie sputters. “Okay, look, what would you do if a girl made a scarf for you?”
Wayne pauses, and Eddie loves his uncle with his whole shriveled heart, but it is always funny watching him try to shift gears when he realizes they’re talking about gay things now.
“Well,” Wayne says slowly, “pretty sure I’m a little too old to have any girl knitting me a scarf.”
“Oh my god,” Eddie groans. “Fine! A mature woman, then. Work with me here!”
Eddie gets a raised eyebrow at the mature woman comment, but Wayne lets it slide. He tilts his head consideringly as he spoons some beans out onto a plate by the stove, where he’s already got toast waiting. He tilts the pan at Eddie, wordlessly offering, and Eddie shakes his head.
“I suppose I’d have to get her something in return,” Wayne finally says. “Or make her something, if I was the creative type.”
Eddie gets another pointed look at those last two words, and he groans again, letting his head fall back in defeat, because he’d been afraid that would be the answer.
“I don’t know what the hell I’m supposed to make. It’s not like I can make him warm clothes or do anything useful,” Eddie says, so caught up in the sudden and dramatic realization that all of his hobbies are entirely useless that he doesn’t manage to duck in time when Wayne gives him a not-entirely-gentle smack on the back of the head as he passes by into the living room.
“Stop that. The things you make are just fine. It doesn’t have to be useful, it just has to be thoughtful,” Wayne says, settling into his chair. “So quit standing around whining and go come up with something you can make to woo your boy.”
“Oh my god.” Eddie covers his face, even though Wayne will definitely already know he’s gone red. “You’re actually the worst. I don’t know why I talk to you.”
“You’re welcome for the advice,” Wayne drawls.
“Yeah, yeah.” Eddie waves a dismissive hand at him, but the quick “thanks” he throws out afterwards is entirely sincere.
He retreats to his room after that; apparently, he has some thinking to do.
[Part 1 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Epilogue | Ao3]
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Ding dong, here’s the final chapter! I have an epilogue in mind so that may come later, but for now, Thanks  so so much for the response to this series and Enjoy!
Ch1 Ch2 Ch3
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[talking] [talking passes]
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Gai: You knew right away, didn’t you? Kka: Correct. I knew something was wrong when you weren’t trying to do situps or anything..... You little criminal, who smuggled that in for you? Gai: Naruto
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Kks: How did you get him to do that? /I/ cant even get Naruto to do things. The tear tracks and shit eating grin are cute. Kinda wanna kiss you. Gai: Don’t let me be a hindrance to-
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Gai: What are you giggling about? Kks: I just remembered
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Kks: I get to hold over your head that I held mirai before you. Gai: You what?! Your first baby hold and I missed it? Get off of me Kks: So mean! Near death made you crabby. Gai: I won’t give into this Kks: You will, you always succumb. [gai sighs annoyed]
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Gai: [Groans] When are they making you swear in as hokage? Kks: That’s not happening anymore thankfully. Gai: Huuuh?? Tenzou didn’t tell me that!
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Gai: He said Lady Tsunade was retiring and you were the only choice. Naruto even tried to- Kks: Where do you think i’ve been all day? I convinced her to hold out until Naruto or whoever  took over next. Gai: How did you smooth talk that one? Kks: I agreed to do her paperwork and cover for when she needs R&R. I also advised her to ditch the elders so she can actually run this shit show right. Gai: And they... took that well? The elders? Kks: No, not at all. Let’s just say I said some... things that made them backtrack on their decision.
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Gai: YOu cant just say that and not tell me now!! I gotta know! Kks: Well... Homura: Absolutely not! Kks: If I am appointed, I’ll be replacing you regardless. Naruto certainly will. It’s inevitable. Koharu: Those kids don’t know how this village runs!
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Kks:Those kids just won your war and this is how you speak of them. Or are “those kids“ only respectable to you when they’re eager to die at your beckon call and shut up. Elders: How dare- Watch your tongue! Kks: I won’t be someone who you can walk all over. Things will change. Just so my intentions are clear
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Gai: What next?! Kks: That’s is really. Kinda tuned the rest out and passed out for 3 hours. Gai: Rival, I was so invested Kks: Sorry Gai: So you agreed to essentially split the work of a hokage but not publicly take the title? Kks: Mhm Gai: So cool! Apologies, I had just assumes since you were gonna accept last time Kks:[hums] Things changed. Konoha’s not on the brink of war, Tsunade’s still here. The village can breathe and rebuild now.
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Kks: After a glimpse of the hassle and public attention the last time, I’m just... Not interested in any of that. I’ve never dreamed or desired to be the hokage. That was always something others wanted /for/ me. So I said no. I know you were happy for me so- Gai: Kakashi
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Gai: I’m so very proud of you for expressing how you truly feel. You and tsunade will do amazing work supporting the next generation. Even If you chose to retire today, I’d still be just as proud of you. Also a selfish part of me if happy to have more time with you. [kks huffs]
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Kks: I’m proud of you too, y’ know. All your hard work, you’re fucking incredible. Glad my dad made me talk to the cool kid in the green jumpsuit. 2nd coolest shinobi. Gai: Only took 25 years, but I’ve finally caught your eye! Kks: Yup, let’s move in together.
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Gai: WHAT?1 Whu-! Kks: I’m fixing up dad’s old house with Tenzou. you should live there with me Gai: Why? Kks: Why are yo suspicious? I’m serious. Space, accessibility for you... I want you around more. Gai: Ok Kks: Ok? Gai: An exciting change is just what my youthful journey needs!! Kks: So yes?
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Gai: I would love to share a home with you, Rival [kks giggling] What now?
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Kks: Did I just make you succumb, Gai-kun? Gai: When can we have a match next, I need to consensually slap you in the head [kks laughs] Why did you say it like that? Kks: I’m sorry! Your pout looks so cute.... You are still moving in with me, right? That wasnt a joke.
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Gai: I’m gonna let you sweat on that one awhile... [whimpers]
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Kks: Love you so much, Gai
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[gai snoring]
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[gai snoring]
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bluecollarmcandtf · 10 days
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"Dude, I took over your dad's body.."
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"...and goddamn is there a lot of him to work with! I've been a ghost for years now, but I've never been inside a 6' 3" ex-linebacker! I've been checking him out all afternoon, and let me tell you that this man is big and hairy all over," he punctuates his comment with a wink.
Your dad, the man you've looked up to your entire life, is saying things you don't want to think about while casually laying on the couch in nothing but a robe and booty shorts. The urge to puke is suppressed, but you know that Jimmy has crossed a line here. Your deceased friend has possessed bullies, professors, and more, but he's never had the balls to take over your own family. What was he thinking?
"I jumped into him while he was at work. I think his coworkers probably found it strange when I picked up his briefcase and waddled his ass out the door," Jimmy chuckles at the memory, "But don't worry. Your old man had plenty of sick days he wasn't gonna use."
It doesn't take long for you to burst out in anger at the spirit controlling your father. Your face is hot, and you can't stand to watch your dad get puppetted around like a fool!
"Calm the fuck down!" he swears uncharacteristically, "Give this big guy a hug. Come here. Daddy needs some love..."
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The thought of hugging your father while he's being forced to act like this feels wrong, but you relent. A part of you is glad for the embrace. It might not actually be your dad, but paternal comfort is exactly what you need right now, and your real dad isn't the type to give his child a hug.
"That's it, son," Jimmy pets your head with your father's thick hands, "Let daddy take care of you. Let your dumb old fart-of-a-father give you some much-needed attention."
You can't help but chuckle at the self-deprecating joke. Your real dad was too proud to laugh at himself, and he'd never made an effort to be anything other than distant and formal with you. In fact, there was a lot your real dad would never do; he'd never leave the office in the middle of the day, he'd never lay around the house like a lazy bum, and he'd certainly never let his hairy chest and thick legs be on full display in front of his disappointing gay son.
Suddenly, while still embraced, you realize there's something poking into your waist.
"Sorry, dude," your father whispers in your ear, "I guess your dad is just happy to see you."
You push him away, insisting that Jimmy needs to stay out of family members' bodies because this just feels so wrong! You search the pair of unnaturally blank eyes for any sign that Jimmy might be listening to you.
"You need to relax, bro," your dad (Jimmy) groans in annoyance. He looks disappointed, but then he sparks up and gives you a new look of excitement. "Son," he says with exaggerated machismo, "Take a page from my book and learn to chill out. It doesn't matter what the world thinks about you or me. I'll prove it to you..."
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With a placid grin and blank gaze, your father lumbers past and marches straight out the front door of the house. You're almost too stunned to follow. Was Jimmy really going to parade your dad's body around the neighborhood in nothing but his robe?
"Afternoon, neighbor," your father's rumbling tone bellows across the street, "Lovely weather, today. My son thought I should take my fat hairy gut for a little stroll in the sun. You know us dads have got to keep our boys happy. Am I right?"
Mr. Jones stares at your father from his porch, just as shocked as you are. He often drank beers with this man and every other neighborhood dad at backyard barbecues and living room game watches. This was not how he normally interacted with the man, and it obviously struck him as weird.
"You alright, Bob?" he asks hesitantly.
"Right as rain, neighbor!" Jimmy answers with a tone that's too goofy to pass as my dad's, "If that's how you're staring at me now, I wonder what'll happen if I take this robe off..."
Before Mr. Jones can process the flirtation in your father's voice, you shuffle your dad further down the street and away from the whole interaction. That may have been hilarious, but Jimmy was going to destroy any reputation and respect your father had around here!
You demand to know where Jimmy is going with this body. It's not like you have any ability to even slow the ghost down when he's got the weight and strength of your 200 lb father.
"I'm thinking the park. Your dad could use some cardio," he smirks, an unfamiliar expression on the grown man's face, "Or maybe the public bathroom on the north end. You know, it has that hole in the stall..."
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No amount of reasoning or arguments can change Jimmy's mind. Apparently he's set on wearing your father to the city's most notorious gay hookup spot.
"Don't look at me like that," his gravelly voice sounds amused by your frustration, "With me in charge, your dad will be the dirtiest slut that bathroom's ever seen. Don't you think it'll be funny to see such a massive, manly bear serving man after man in there?"
You sigh in disbelief.
"Or...maybe I don't have to rent out your dad's body to a bunch of strangers..."
You wonder where he's going with this. It sounds like an ultimatum is coming, and you don't like the idea of your crazy dead friend giving you an ultimatum.
"...your dad could hold off on bottoming for strangers...if...you let him be your submissive little bitch."
The choice is an annoying one, but you're pretty sure you can't let your dad have unprotected sex with strangers in a public place. This is what he'd want right?
"That's what I thought," the grin on your father's face twists maniacally. He tussles your hair like he's the proudest dad in the world, "Let's head on back home, buddy. Daddy's gonna lick every inch of sweat off that body of yours. He's got years of emotional absence to make up for."
One of his beefy arms cradles your back and turns you around. You're relieved to no longer be headed towards the public bathroom, but you're still a little nervous about what awaits you at home. How does Jimmy expect you to enjoy any of this when it's your dad doing all these things to you?
"Daddy's gonna treat you to a night that's all about you," he goes on, "Cooking you dinner, rubbing your feet, cuddling on the couch, and so much more. I want you to think of some humiliating things daddy can do for you while we walk back. Make sure they're extra degrading or your dad will just have to step out of the house and degrade himself where the entire city can see..."
The last comment gives you butterflies in your stomach, but it also gives you a bit of a hard-on. Maybe Jimmy playing with your dad wasn't so scary of an idea after all. With him possessed, anything was on the table: personal affirmations, some much needed bonding, roleplay, revenge, humiliation. Heck, you could even give your father a golden shower and Jimmy would have him smiling through it!
Walking home, you steal glances at your dad, towering over you as his rotund gut leads the way. Home can't come fast enough!
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master-xochimilli · 7 months
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◇ About + DNI ◇
Currently: Offline
Welcome to my blog~ My name is Xochimilli, though I'm sure some of you would be eager to call me Master or Sir
A 21 year old genderqueer boygirl cat thing, It/He pronouns (yes capitalized :3)
My asks are always open, go ahead tell me anything, I love going aaaa and talking. Just be nice. Please don't just say "hi" or try to get me to e fuck you, I'm a person
If you cannot handle different time zones and the fact others have work and responsibilities don't even bother. Asks will not be answered right away, please take situation/time sensitive asks with a grain of salt.
Time Zone: GMT -6 • Mexico City
♡ Pet
My pet is the lovely @onetiredpup, or 🫀 puppy who I lovee and adore so so soooo much 💛 THE BOYFRIEND YIPPPEE YAYY HOORAYY :3 💛💛💛💛💛 A A AAAAAA AA AAAAAAA KISSING HIM KISSING HER HUGGING THEM SO TIGHTLY
◇Anon Pets◇
•🪐 • 🩻 • 🦇 • 🪲 • 🐻 • 🐼 • ⚰️ • 🌱 • doe • 🧜‍♀️ • 🫧 • 🌻 • 👑 • 🦦 • 🌌 • 🥺 • 🤍 • 🐾 • 🍰 • 🍑 • 🪣 • 👑🖤 • 🍊 • 🍤 • 🐈‍⬛ • 🪷 • 🐞 • 🐬 • 🌟 • 🏩 • ✴️
◇ DNI ◇
Minors and ageless blogs fuck off, I will block you.
Typical DNI, dont be a bitch to others. Raceplay, and ED blogs also dni, for personal reasons, I can and will block anyone I want to, this is my safe space.
I also just reccomend not to interact if you just want the horny!!! I will rb anything n everything I want <3
◇ Kinks ◇ Limits under cut ◇
Kinks◇
Petplay
Impact play
Soft Degradation + Praise
Bondage
Piss/Omo
Somno
Breeding
Pregnancy
Edging + Cum Denial
Free Use
CNC (emphasis on the consent)
Sub/Dom
Knifeplay
Intox (only alcohol)
Biting/Marking
Primal
Royalty play
Lactation/Milking
Blood
Cockwarming
Objectum
Pain/Physical Injury
Possesiveness
Forcemasc
Monsterfucking
Gore (will not post about it)
Cannibalism (will not post about it)
I'm a bitch ass soft baby when being subby and bottoming, so feel free to ask beforehand about my limits!!!
Limits◇
Apart from what is included in the DNI, do not offer to include these. I either don't enjoy them personally or can't do/write for them !!!
Use of the word "rape" in cnc (literally a fucking victim of it, me panicking and having flashbacks about over it will not be fun so stfu!!!)
Scat
Inflation
Ageplay
Raceplay
Brat taming (I am too soft for it)
Vomit
Size difference
Cheating
AB/DL
Hypno
Sissy
Weight gain/Loss + Feederism
My puppy's good boy chart ♡
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Good boy chart for my lovely puppyyyyy, my sweet boyfriend @onetiredpup 💛 So so sooo excited for using it with him !!!! Will update it as they get stickers :3 so everyone can see what a good boy she is~
based off @/droolypupboy's chart !!!!
◇ More:
I'm just queer, so it doesn't matter what you are it's gay if it includes me sexually. Because someone asked: I am kind of pretty sure I am monoamorous, I will engange in sexual play but no romantic stuff :3 -> Aro adjacent thing, heart is being weird about it, might be not fully aro. I have a boyfriebd. I have a boyfriend. Did I mention I have a boyfriend? I have a boyfriend and I love him I love my boyfriend with my whole being 💛 My boyfriend my beloved kissing her face right now actually because I love them and my blog is kinda obviously all about him lmao
Not a transman, I am genderqueer, please respect the queer part of it, no I am not justifying or explaining my gender to you.
I do enjoy being the top dom most of the time, but I'm a nice switch vers at heart and wouldn't mind switching it up if a person came along and put me in place like the clingy kitty I am
Will be referred to as sir, master and people I frequently talk to in a sexual setting can use daddy, only as a title, and nothing more
All pet/master, d/s relations are for fun but I feel very strongly and I will care about you and probably count you as a close friend :3
Autistic and ADHD, and mentally ill, and chronically pained– Age regressor will always log out before regressing. Also a full time worker, don't fret if I don't answer right away~
Please, please, keep in mind I am mentally ill. I am not a healthy person, do not take everything I say as the best option, nor as the best advice. I have shit memory, shit emotions and at times questionable responses.
I will log off the moment I feel myself age regressing, unless I get explicit agreement when big, to be regressed with you, and I will not click out the chat!!
Not open to sending pictures, but will keep any pictures or videos sent my way~ For any curious pet, I'm a pre op and pre t, 5 foot 2 and probably the most fem thing ever
Living in CDMX, long periods of silence are usually due to getting stuck in traffic or power outages, or when regressing.
◇Xochi is a real person I am not horny all the time lmao
A part time librarian! Head of the children's section of the library I work at, love taking care of kids and helping them get interested in reading. Also part time English teacher! Really just doing things I like nowdays~
I'm a pretty big softie at heart, expert crybaby, expert emotion feeler, expert at caring too much. I am also good at being dumb and laughing too much at stupid shit :3
I like stuff apart from masturbating and getting others horny~ Like drawing, Sky: Children of the Light, Sanrio (My Melody my beloved ♡), Percy Jackson, Artemis Fowl, Pretty Cure, plushies and cooking to name a few things I like, so don't be afraid to just talk about my interests! I'm not scary I promise :]
Understanding and open, don't like me being too rough? Go ahead and tell me— Will gladly compliment and comfort you, don't be shy! Also be a sweetheart and tell me if you get excited hm?
◇ Tags ◇
#xochimilli writes -> Orignal text posts
#xochimilli answers◇ -> Answering asks
#xochimilli's pets -> My pets being cute
#xochimilli comfort ->Only comfort more sfw
#xochimilli speaks ->Me bitching about stuff
#xochi is the breeding bitch -> Bottom/Sub POV writings
#important◇ -> important shit lmao
#☆lynn no mires☆ ->irl Xochi, audios and pictures
#🫀puppy-> For my love, my bf, my sweetheart, the one who fills my whole heart and my sunshine :3 ♡
#🫀💛 -> reblogs that make me think of them ♡
♱𝖋𝖆𝖌𝖌𝖔𝖙♱ <- matchy matchy for my bestie my beloved HOLAAA SEÑOR GACHA AAAAAAA
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prettynice8 · 5 months
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Kinkmas Day 1: Rimming
Paring: Kakashi Hatake x male reader
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This guy
Warnings: Rimming DUH, anal fingering, teasing, slight begging, little bottom twinky fuck me daddy feminine male reader, no actual sex, enemies to lovers? I think that's it
Word Count: 1,307
Fuck him. Fuck his pretty silver hair that I just want to run my hands through while he eats my ass, his muscular form that must have been crafted by the sage of six paths himself, his beautiful attention catching eye, his mysterious mask, his (what I hope is) insanely large dick. Just fuck the whole thing (I wish).
Of course, the only person you could be thinking of is the one and only Kakashi Hatake, copy ninja of the leaf, and the hottest mother fucker to ever exist. Oh god did you have an obsession with him. Having wet dream after wet dream about him, screaming his name while masturbating, and it doesn't help that you catch him staring at you all the time almost as much as he catches you staring at him.
This whole obsession started a month ago when you saw him reading one of his goddamn sex books in the middle of the street. You walked over to him and asked why he was reading erotica in a VERY public place, and he just looked at you "Because it's hot." he stated matter-of-factly. The nerve of some people, from then on you two would see each other walking around, say hi, go your respective ways. It's been that way ever since; stolen glances and fuck me eyes since.
Until now. You were done with man after man not fulfilling you like you think he may be able to, maybe, it's a complete guess but he just gives off the vibe. Anyway, you saw him reading his demented sex shit again when you decided to make your fantasies a reality once and for all. You walk behind the bench he was sitting on and read the words on the page and HOLY SHIT IT'S GAY RIMMING. You mentally scream into the pillow like a 15-year-old girl who just found out her crush is available, which is kind of like what's going on.
"Uhm, can I help you?" Kakashi questions in his horny inducing voice, with a little annoyance sprinkled in through all the underwear wetting.
"Oh sorry, am I disturbing a public jack off sesh." You coldly state with a smirk on your face, hand doing a little masturbation gesture.
"Do you mind." he says rhetorically, the twinge of annoyance from earlier much more noticeable now.
"If you didn't want someone to talk to you then why are you reading 'that' on a public bench in the middle of the street again?" you sassily question.
"Because I wanted to read outside, privately." He answers, you look at him like he's the dumbest man in the whole world.
"Then why, in the absolute fuck, are you reading in the street you attention whore." you rhetorically ask, the previous sass now developed into genuine frustration as you walk around the bench to be right in front of him.
"That's cute coming from you." he chuckles.
"And what's that supposed to mean?" you ask.
"Don't act dumb, you have been trying to get into my pants for weeks now." he exclaims, you start to blush, ensuring that what he said is true.
"Don't act so high and mighty with me. I've seen you look at me too bitch." you state. He stands up, his large frame completely dwarfing you, his eyes almost angry. You do a cartoonish and audible gulp, the fear enhancing the horniness.
It's quiet for a while until he leans down,
"And what of it" he whispers in your ear and grabs you ass tightly, not caring if anyone sees. You let out a soft yelp at the sudden sign of attraction. You're completely stunned, not knowing what to do. He realizes this and before you can think any more, he holds you close and grabs your ass tighter and whispers,
"My place." It wasn't even a question or a request, it was a demand. One that even given the choice you wouldn't say no to.
Before you know it you're already on your way to Kakashi's place. He's giving you a piggyback ride to save time, and because he wants that juicy cake as quickly as possible, his mind is going crazy with your legs wrapping around him.
Finally, you make it to his place and immediately you both rush into his room. Right when you both enter you get off his back and onto the bed. Your legs spread as he takes off both your pants and underwear and tosses them both to the side.
"Now, turn around and bend over." already making demands and he hasn't even bought you dinner yet, not that you care because without a single moment of hesitation you are already on your hands and knees.
Without warning he immediately put his long skilled digit into your readily awaiting hole. He moves slowly as he starts to open you up. All the while you let out quiet moans.
"Your little moans are so cute." he said. Suddenly you feel a second finger enter you. He stays at the same excruciatingly slow pace. While he's pumping his fingers, he starts to feel the rest of your ass, rubbing it sensually and squeezing at the sensitive skin.
He puts in the third finger and his speed starts to pick up. Now your moans start to get louder as his three fingers stay at a steady and quick speed. He pumps them in and out over and over with precise repetition.
his fingers start to curl inside you, twisting and turning inside you perfectly. It's at this point that you are officially a moaning mess. The all too familiar feeling churns into your stomach. His fingers start turning and hitting your sweet spot consistently.
Then the feeling of relief washes over you as his fingers twist and hit your spot for the final time. You let out a loud moan and crash into the bed, cumming without even him putting his dick in you.
But he wasn't satisfied with just feeling inside you as he picked you up and brought you to your hands and knees again.
"Not yet sweetheart." he says as he starts to rub and massage your ass cheeks, caressing them to his desire. He gives you a quick and sharp spank, you cry out in pleasure from the surprise as he watches you ass jiggle in awe.
He puts his mask down and licks your ass, putting small and harmless love bites from time to time. Each lick and bite getting closer and closer to your hole. You start begging him to just devour you already. "Please, god I've fantasized about this please." you cry out, wanting, no, craving for his tongue.
"Well since you asked so nicely." he calmly states, though you can tell the excitement in his voice, aware that he wants this too. He licks lines on your cheek until FINALLY taking small licks on your entrance. Your spine chills in anticipation and pleasure and your breathing becomes shaky.
He licks languid circles on your entrance slowly. His hands are still caressing the rest of your ass. Your legs are shaking due to the stimulation and your cock is as hard as can be. He stops his simple licking and finally puts his tongue in your ass.
It starts off slowly but develops quickly into a fast pace, his tongue going in and out of you. You are now officially a moaning mess as his tongue is assaulting your hole. He continues this and then starts to put his fingers back in your hole while his mouth is still doing its job.
The familiar feeling in your stomach starts to build up again as his talented hands and mouth works on your asshole. Your moans crescendo until finally you climax for the second time of the night.
And you're not done yet.
THE END
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zombyjuice · 3 months
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YOU USED TO LIVE A BLONDED LIFE₊˚⊹ ᰔ(๑ᵕ⌓ᵕ̤)>c[_]
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in which it’s almost valentines and all wonbin can think about is the girl on his bus rides home.
wonbin x fem!reader
cussing, awkward, kinda bad ngl, reader is poc ermmm enjoy :3
“I’m lonely, I need a man before Valentine or I’ll go fucking insane” you speak coming up behind your friend Luna who practically jumped out of her seat phone flying in the air “Goodness! Someone needs to go put a bell on you” you look down at her with a menacing stare getting out of your 🕴️pose and going to the other side to grab your chair, stepping over her phone.
“I feel like you’ve already gone insane,” she picks up her phone thanking God it’s not broken “Cute hair by the way” she points out your now dark brown hair up put in a ponytail and a white headband with a fluffy blue star clip attached to it, you smile softly touching your hair “hopefully that cute boy on the bus thinks the same, he’s always staring at me I think he wants at me” you let out a giggle and jump up and down on your chair “oh my GOSH he’s so fine how~”
“shut up I’m sure he’s going to like it your pretty and look straight out of one of those old quirky Japanese fashion magazines, also you don’t have the worst personality” she states finishing her coffee “Oh? whatever fuck you let’s go” you kick her under the table and watch her face curl up in pain laughing out loud.
You guys shuffle out of the cafe with grumpy faces seeing all Valentine’s decorations and giddy men and women with gifts for the significant others, “disgusting” you sneer “Be happy” you glare at her “Shut the fuck up and be mad with me fuck valentines!” you slightly shout her eyes darting around not understanding how you have no shame(in Korea), you were a strange complex person but she loved you for it, deciding to ignore the glares.
Not even on the bus yet eyes immediately start darting trying to find the boy excited dressed just for him even though in the back of your mind you knew you were never going to go up to him ever, especially remembering your first interaction.
To make a long story short he was at the bus station at 1 am doing God knows what (waiting for the bus) and since there was barely anyone there you and Luna thought it was the best time to do a silly little TikTok you sprouting with energy cause Luna just gave you tons of it.
The song was slowed down so there you were dancing your heart out (slowly) to Ma Boy by sistar19 to get the perfect video and everything would’ve been fine if you didn’t heard the stifled laugh that the boy was holding.
Your face contoured with fear and Luna's deadpan while tapping your shoulder to run. And ever since then you’d see the boy every day, which would be concerning any other man but this was a breathtaking man who looked at you like he wanted to go down on you any moment.
Luna says it’s not that bad because the video ended up being great the sped up video making people laugh and you guys got viral the next day but you think that was hands down the most embarrassing moment of your life.
“I think you guys would look good together” your friend states while you guys eagerly waiting for the bus “What do you mean? How?!” you get giddy slapping her arm “idk it give cute black cat bf and weird orange cat gf” “okay can you hop off always trying to insult me” “that’s what I do best” “oh you're a fucker” “ow! Stop pinching me gay fuck” “You’re g-”
“the doors open” a quiet voice that belonged to no other than your future(not really) pretty black cat boyfriend >:3
you both barely look back and beeline into the bus.
“haha,” you awkwardly laugh a little too late at the boy who looked at you a little silly, both of your eyebrows raised strangely at each other “Oh my gosh” Luna muttered.
You turned around all of a sudden you would like to leave right about now.
The bus ride was quite awkward you and your friend standing and chatting sometimes losing yourselves in the convos and laughing a bit too loud immediately going to check if he looked at you a certain way.
You guys shared cute glances here and there you could feel the way he looked at your outfit or the way he scanned your side profile also not failing to catch the soft grin plastered on his face.
When the time came around for you to get off your bus stop you frowned, yeah you guys never talked before and you weren’t planning on it, but his presence was enough you could gladly sit awkwardly next to him as he looked at you with those cute boba eyes, gladly giving him the same look back.
You gave him one last look and a soft tight lip smile before walking away with your friend off the bus, but what you didn’t catch was that he followed you guys off.
“excuse me- excuse me”
You guys turn stiff and you snap back to see him slightly smile and wave “Can I um speak to you, please, not to be weird or anything”
You look at Luna with a smile a little too bright and she nods smiling back and glaring at Wonbin before walking off.
you look back at the boy's direction and you walk up to meet each other properly…
“You changed your hair,” he states blankly your eyes go a bit wide, and chuckle a bit “Yeah I was tired of the blonde, but I’m nervous this might be too plain though it does look a lot better I might add some color or maybe like a couple of blo- sorry I blabbering” he giggles a little too hard eyes turning into crescents and cheeks burning red “sorry that was a weird statement, not your fault, haha but um I’m Wonbin…” he scammed your features and your reactions finding them all so cute how expressive and real you are it’s like he could see you take note of his name in your head.
“Wonbin.. pretty I like it! I’m y/n” his face burned more and he couldn’t help but let out a nervously high giggle “Also pretty I think you're pretty too and I wanted to introduce myself properly and take you on a date or two before you know, Valentine's” gulp.
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auteurdelabre · 4 months
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SOMETHING TO FIGHT FOR VINGETTE #2 dad!Joelxf!Reader
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Rating: 18+ (explicit, mdni)
Words: 4.7k
Summary: When you send Joel a dirty picture during work one day you don't forsee it changing your entire future for the better.
Tags: established relationship (married), dirty talk, public sex, masturbation (m), office sex, breeding kink if ya squint, wife/husband talk, pregnancy talk, caught, fluff and smut.
a/n: While this is from the STFF universe, it could read as a stand alone with you and Joel in an established relationship!
=========================================
Done as a request from two amazing readers who requested STFF vignettes of:
Also maybe some joel x mc stuff bc girlll 👀🥵
The “fuck me pregnant” smut. 👀
You know who you are ;-p
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Joel doesn't text. 
He hates the too small screen and how his big thumbs hit all the wrong buttons. He dislikes that he has to use his glasses to read the ones you send. He hates that at eight years old Sarah is already more adept to technology than him. 
So when the first few texts come through to your phone you're genuinely confused. 
Joel [11:12am]
Wish you w uhere hhere with me
[11:12am]
Did someone steal this phone?
Joel [11:13am]
what?
[11:13am]
My husband doesn't text. :-p
Joel [11:14 am]
What ttyhe fuck is :-p
[11:14 am]
Tilt your phone. 
A pause. Then. 
Joel [11:19am]
Jesus waas trying to be romantic and your sticking yourr tongue outt at me
You panic.
[11:19am]
No, I liked it! I was just being funny!
[11:19am]
I love that you're texting me!
[11:20am]
I was just kidding!
A longer pause, one in which you can imagine Joel sitting in his work truck, smirking down at his phone, fingers going over the buttons hitting wrong ones along the way. 
Joel [11:19am]
I knoww hoynhey I was ttoo
It's sweet actually, the way he tries so hard. You know texting isn't his thing, technology in general really isn't. But he's trying because he knows you*** like it. When you show him something funny Maria sent you via text or when you're pensive, hunched over your phone on the sofa, typing something over to Alex about work. 
It makes you feel soft for him, your body warm. 
[11:20am]
I miss you too baby.
Joel [11:21am]
Wish I could seedh you right now
His words are simple but they pack a punch. You wish you could see him right now too. In fact you wish every day was just like the weekend. The three of you in this perfect, happy bubble of comfort and laughter and love. It feels so good. 
You've been really busy at work lately, long hours. You wonder if this is what Joel is picking up on. This distance. The thought breaks your heart. 
You've also been talking about having a baby. A big step. Joel is so eager, so excited to create life with you. But you? You're terrified. You had a horrible fucking childhood. You're scared of what that could mean for your parenting. 
You look at your wedding ring set, twisting it and smiling softly.
The thing is, even if you were the worst parent Joel would be there to help. Joel is the most wonderful parent in the world. He patiently helps Sarah with her homework, he's impossibly kind to her even when she's defiant, he lets her put all manner of bow and glitter and product in his hair as she practices the latest hairstyles she's seen. He's a wonderful father. He's a wonderful husband. He's just... So fucking wonderful. 
You take a moment to consider Joel's message, then turn your phone to take a selfie to send to Joel. You're smiling at your desk and on impulse give a peace sign. The door to your office opens and Alex walks through with paperwork just as you snap the photo. 
"Tell me you're not sending that to Joel," Alex says and you lower your hand frowning at her. 
"Why? Last time I checked he liked my face."
Alex rolls her eyes dramatically, heaving the file of rescue records onto your desk.
"I'm gay and even I know a guy doesn't want a cheesy smiling photo from his wife." She gives you a knowing look.
"Huh?"
"He wants something. . . Special." 
When you continue to look confused she raises her eyebrows. "A photo you wouldn't send to anyone else if you catch my drift ..."
Oh.
You laugh breathily, your face going red at the insinuation. You mumble something about getting back to the funders and Alex stops at the doorway. 
"I'm heading for lunch with Tosin," she tells you, suddenly all business. "I don't know if you remembered."
"I did," you nod motioning out the door. "I left the speaking points by the front door."
"Amazing, I'll debrief when I get back."
Alex leaves, closing the door behind her, leaving you to stare down at your phone to see the grainy photo of you smiling flashing a peace sign and you wince. Is Alex right? It does look kinda immature. 
You delete it. 
You glance up to see your door closed and take a moment to consider. You take the phone in your hand again, thrusting it under your blouse and pulling back the cups of your bra. 
"Can't believe I'm doing this," you murmur to yourself, even though there's a part of you that finds this all a bit exciting. You press the button and feel a thrill go through you. 
You pull the camera out of your shirt, peering into the phones display. You frown when it comes out blurry with what you think is your nipple in the corner. 
Fuck.
No it's too... In your face. No mystery. You'll go a different route. You tug open your first few buttons at the collar of your shirt, until the lace of your bra is seen. You bend forward, allowing the camera to capture your winking face and generous show of cleavage. 
You hook your finger into the lace of your bra, suggesting more but showing just the skin. You tilt your head so your neck looks long and delicate. 
You snap a few photos until you find one you that you like; the one where you look playful and sexy and you attach it to the message. 
[11:33am]
Hopefully this tides you over. Xoxo
The photo is sent and you feel your body tingle as you imagine Joel innocently checking his phone for a text only to find that image waiting for him. You put your phone back down on your desk, eyes drifting to your computer. 
Suddenly you freeze. 
Wait what if he answers his phone while he's at the job site with a bunch of others? What if someone else sees? Oh fuck, what if Tommy sees?! You'll never be able to look him in the face again! 
Before you can throw yourself into a full blown fit of pique the alert comes through on your phone that you have another message. 
You flip the phone open to his message of just one word. 
Joel [11:34am]
More.
A thrill goes through you at the thought of Joel in his truck or at the job site turned on because of that photo. It makes your thighs clamp together as you imagine him looking at the photo, his eyes wide, his pouty mouth parted. 
You stand and lock the door to your office. You glance at your watch, thankful that Alex should be gone for a while. 
You don't reply right away because your trembling fingers unbutton the rest of your blouse. You'll send him a little striptease you think. 
You receive another text from him as you reach the bottom button. 
Joel [11:35am]
??
You laugh out loud at his impatience, typing hurriedly back. 
[11:35am]
Be patient. 
Your shirt is unbuttoned to your bellybutton and your bra is pulled down to show a peek of your nipple. Your finger grazes the bra cup, tugging. You snap this picture and send it off. The reply is immediate.
Joel [11:36am]
Youu look so good bby
You can imagine how Joel says it, voice all low and syrupy. Fuck you're turned on.
You fumble with the hem of your skirt tugging it down until the band of your panties is showing. You slip a hand underneath and raise the camera again. 
Your neck is tilted back and you let the camera capture your lower lip full as you bite it. You send it off, pulse pounding. 
Joel [11:38am]
Fuckd oplease morrhee. 
Joel can barely function. All the blood has gone to his cock. When he receives another image seconds later, this one of your hands between your legs, head tilted back and your eyes heavy lidded in pleasure he can't take any more. He fumbles the numbers on his phone, holding the cell to his ear. 
"Hello?"
"You know what you're doin' to me?"
His voice is low and husky and you're loving that twang of his that comes out sometimes. 
"No idea," you smile. "I'm just here working away."
"Makin' me hard, baby," Joel groans. "Had to go to my truck so no one would see."
The smile dies from your face, replaced with a mask of surprise as Joel's words register with you. This is followed quickly by desire. 
"You touching yourself, Miller?" 
Joel gives a shaky laugh. "No."
You swallow, your face burning with shame and lust. "Would you?"
Joel takes a quick glance around his work site. He's pretty far away from everything having parked in the back lot. But there's always a chance of someone walking by.
"Here in my truck? Right now?"
"Yeah," you offer swallowing. "I.. if you want I'd... Yeah."
Joel can hear it, the breathless catch in your voice. That little hitch that happens when you're turned on. You know he hears it because you can practically hear him smile over the phone.
"I gotta go park somewhere more quiet."
"No," you breathe heavily. "Do it there."
"One of the guys might see."
You don't speak but he hears the way your breathing increases in speed. He feels his pants grow uncomfortably tight now, desperate for you to be there in the truck with him right now. Desperate to see that unfocused look you get when you're turned on. 
"Exhibitionist are we?" Joel teases. "You like that I might be caught?"
"I... I guess so," you say surprising yourself. "Yeah."
"How're they gonna look me in the eye if they catch me jerking off in my truck?"
You laugh at this, but only to break the tension. It's a breathless thing. 
"Don't get caught."
You wonder if Joel thinks you're depraved for this. In all honesty you'd never thought something like this could be hot. But right now you're turned on out of your mind. Imagining Joel hard for just a photo of you, hearing his breathing grow unsteady. 
Joel as always though, knows you so well. 
"Making you wet knowing you got me here in my truck all desperate?" Joel asks, and his voice is pitched low. 
You let out a soft whine, your hand tightening around the phone receiver.
"Squirming there at your desk knowing I'm palming myself through my jeans right now?" You hear Joel give a soft shudder. "You like knowing that you do this to me, honey?"
"Jesus ... Yeah." 
He lets out a dark, smooth chuckle. The kind he presses against the hollow of your throat when you're in bed together. 
"And what are you gonna do for me?"
"Anything you want," you say earnestly. "The second I see you. Anything you want."
"S' that a promise?"
"Of course."
"Alright then," Joel says, leaning back a bit on the bench seat of his truck, his eyes scanning to make sure he's still alone. "You tell me what you want."
You pause. It's one thing to say things when you're together in bed, sweaty bodies writhing against one another. It's quite another midday over the phone. 
"Gotta hear you ask for it," Joel teases huskily. "Then I'm happy to give it to you."
You can hear his belt buckle and zipper over the phone and desire pools in your belly. He's really doing this.
"Want you to make yourself come," you say just above a whisper, blushing all the way to your roots, "while you're thinking about me."
"I'm always thinkin' about you," Joel assures you with a groan. And you can hear the unmistakable sound of flesh on flesh as he begins to stroke himself. 
"Yeah?" You say, swallowing. "What do you think about?"
"How you look at me when I'm between your legs."
Joel is blunt. He always has been. It's what you love about him and in this moment it turns you on so much your mouth goes dry. 
"Remember our honeymoon?" He groans, hand moving jerkily over his cock. "That night in Santorini?"
Fuck yeah you do.
You listen through the phone, eyes shut as Joel groans huskily into the receiver. His breathing is heavy, and you can tell he's got his teeth clenched. You hold yourself still, not wanting to miss a single fucking sound. 
"You still there?" Joel's voice is thick and rasping. The tone makes your thighs press together under the desk. 
"Uh huh," you pant. "Please don't stop."
"You really like this," Joel says and you can almost hear the curl in his smile. "I'll have to remember that." 
You can hear the movements of his hand increasing; can picture him in his truck jerking himself off with one hand, the other holding his cell to his ear. Why is that the sexiest thing you can imagine? 
What was he wearing this morning again? Oh fuck, that's right. That green plaid flannel, the one that he rolls up so it shows off his thick forearms. This inserts itself into your fantasy and you physically feel your panties dampen. 
"You got me so fuckin' hard, baby," Joel grunts out, his voice hitching with each swipe of his palm over the head of his member. "Love knowing you're sitting there turned on outta your mind." 
"I am," you whimper. "Fuck, I really am, Joel."
Your legs cross under the table and you squeeze them. Pleasure shoots up your core. You let out a trembling whine at the sensation.
"Love those ... Mmmph....sounds," Joel grunts into the receiver, imagining you there with your mouth parted. "Gettin' close-"
You've started rocking in your seat as you imagine it. 
"Want you here, your mouth-"
And then abruptly you hear Joel's breath catch, hear the rustling of his body on his truck. 
"I gotta go baby."
Before you can deny this interruption the line goes dead. Your legs cross, squeezing, desperate. 
Fuck.
Your phone alerts you to a text coming in. 
Joel
[11:48am]
Sorry bby. Tommy was commhing over. 
Disappointment doesn't touch on how you're feeling right now. 
You go back to your paperwork, deciding that you'll pick up things later when something occurs to you.
You bunch your skirt up to your waist and with a smirk you raise the camera to snap a photo of your legs spread with your damp panties on display. You giggle and send it off with: You owe me. Xo
You smooth down your skirt and re-button your shirt, looking presentable. You stand on shaking legs and unlock your office door, opening it. 
You go back to the funding report you have to fill in, your mind turning back to the sanctuary and the animal adoption reports. 
An hour or so later the main door to the office opens and you go to ask Alex how the meeting went when two familiar brown eyes come into view and your husband streaks towards your office. 
"Joel?"
His eyes are blazing. He comes into your office, closing the door behind him. You stand at his approach, coming to rest your hip against your desk, pulling him into your arms. 
He's wearing that green flannel and he smells like the outdoors, fresh and clean. You bury your nose in his neck inhaling. 
"Didn't get to finish our conversation," Joel murmurs against the top of your head. “Got your text and saw you needed me."
"Needed you?" You tease, cocking your head to the side, looking up at his face. "Whatever for?"
He gives a wry grin before sliding his wide palm between your legs, pressing over pressing over your clothed sex and rubbing gently. 
"This."
He smirks down at you, dark eyes on your lips. You kiss him fiercely, hands digging into the flesh of his neck, urging his mouth tighter against yours. His tongue slips between your lips and you moan against that deft muscle. 
"Couldn't leave you wet and waitin'," Joel murmurs as he plants kisses along your jaw. 
"Joel we can't do this here," you say amused and turned on. "Alex could be back any second."
"You promised me," Joel says, hands on your hips. "Anythin’ I want the second I see you, remember?"
You give him a crooked grin because really, you can't deny him. You don't want to. 
He urges your bottom back onto the desk as your hands reach for his belt. You both move quickly, aware that time is of the essence.
His wide hands tug your panties off without hesitation and within seconds he's inside you, bracing the two of you against the desk. Your arms are around his neck for purchase, his hands on your hips as he thrusts into you. 
"So wet for me," Joel groans in your ear as you bounce against him. The desk creaks with every thrust. 
"Always," you groan honestly. 
"Could barely drive here straight. All I could think about was..." Joel lets out a shuddering groan. "Fucking you right here on your desk. Watching you come for me."
You can barely form words. All you can do is hold tightly around his neck as he fucks into you, groaning and grunting beautiful, filthy things. His thumb finds your clit and begins circling as he slows the movements of his hips. 
Joel never lets himself come before you do. Not unless you expressly insist on it. He's working you slowly, his eyes heavy and fixed on your expressive face. You allow him to unbutton and strip your shirt from you, leaving you in just your skirt and bra, body tilted against his as you groan. 
"Lean back baby," he urges. "Lemme see you." 
You comply without hesitation, shoving your papers to the ground as you rest your spine along the desk. You don't care about funding proposals right now. All you care about is Joel and the beautifully slow way he's touching you. 
Joel watches you laying there for him, cheeks flushed and eyelids heavy. He's never seen anything so fucking sexy. And you’re his.
Waking up to you, going to sleep with your arm around his waist, seeing you with Sarah, talking about your day, watching movies as a family, going to the zoo. Every day since you've moved in has been bliss (aside from the odd argument because well, you're both human). He's so ridiculously in love with you. He wants to give you everything. 
And the fact that you want him as much as he wants you sometimes seems like a dream. One he never wants to wake from. You tell him every day you love him. That you love Sarah. You want to hear about their days, you want to be around them all the time. The way that unlike with Paul, you showed off your engagement ring every chance you could the second it was placed on your finger. 
He thinks about your wedding day, the way you'd looked coming down the aisle to him, how your lips felt when he kissed you for the first time as your husband. The way you call yourself his wife with pride to anyone who will listen.
And now you're here, his wife, laying against the desk as he thrusts into you, begging him for more looking so fucking gorgeous. He'll give you more. He'll give you anything, everything.* He wants to make life with you. Wants your belly swollen and everyone knowing that you're his. Wants to pick out baby names and do lamaze classes and watch you carry something you both created inside you. 
He knows you're not certain, knows that you're hesitant and he'd never force you. Knows that despite being off birth control you're still wanting him to use condoms. And he does without fuss. He will as long as you need him to. 
If you never want to get pregnant he doesn't mind. He got you and Sarah and that's all he needs. Another baby would be a joyful addition, but not necessary for his happiness. 
You're breathing quickly, chest heaving. You don't object when Joel begins tugging down your bra until your breasts are exposed to him. Joel makes a soft strangled noise in the back of his throat as they jolt and ripple under his thrusts.  
"How're you so goddam perfect?"
You grin up at him, your voice breathless. "Was gonna a-ask you the same thing, Miller."
You moan when his full mouth finds an exposed nipple, sucking and licking while he worries the other between his fingers. When he gently nibbles there you let out a sharp cry of pleasure. 
Joel thrusts between your legs slowly, filling you and with his mouth around your nipple he watches with saddled brows as your eyes roll back in your head. 
"So fucking gorgeous."
You're only able to whimper for him, thighs spreading further as he moves himself deeper between your legs. Your ankles cross behind him and he pulls back, his thumb once more against your clit. He can feel that you're close, your hips rutting more aggressively. 
"So good," you whimper up at him as the pleasure reaches that apex of pleasure. "You feel so f-fucking good, Joel."
He's curves over you, one hand on your hip, the other between your legs as his thumb works against you. He's looking at you with a look of such love that it takes your breath away. And he's all yours. This is your man. Your husband. Tears prick the corners of your eyes before pleasure between your thighs overtakes you. Your head tilts back. 
"Gonna come for me, honey?" 
You nod, overcome emotionally and now physically as your orgasm rushes through you. You arch back against the desk and Joel watches as your naked breasts tilt to the ceiling as you tighten around him. 
"There she goes," Joel says approvingly, his thumb not ceasing its movements as you crest for him. He feels you flutter around him and he groans as he throbs within you.  
"So good, baby."
You preen under the praise and you begin to come down, your eyes so heavy lidded Joel muses that you look asleep.
"Joel," you whine, hands reaching for him. "Please."
He gives you an indulgent grin, leaning over to kiss you. He gives a little grunt when you wrap your arms around his neck, kissing him deeply. You pull back when his hips stay stationary. 
"I didn't bring a condom," he confesses. "Thought I had one in the truck. Guess we'll have to finish this up at home tonight."
"But-" you're leaning up on your elbows, watching as Joel smiles lovingly down at you. "But you came here?"
"'Course," Joel says with a small smile, starting to pull back from between your thighs. "Needed to make sure my wife wasn't aching for me all day."
You feel everything in your body attuned to him. Seeing no guile, no resentment there in his deep brown eyes. He really just came to make you feel good with no expectation of his own pleasure. And that's what seals it, though you'd known it all along. You tugg off your bra and shirt completely, your eyes trained on his. 
"Want you to come," you say, your eyes trained on his. "Don't care about a condom."
You stand shakily, pressing him to sit in the chair behind your desk. Joel assumes that you're talking about a blow job, so he's confused when you throw a leg over his lap, perching there. 
"Honey do you know what you're saying," Joel says when you begin to lower yourself over his hips. "We've talked and-"
"I know what I'm saying and doing," you tell him, pulling him back out of his jeans hurriedly. "And I'm asking you to fuck me bare."
Joel's dark eyes blow wide and you can see the pupil rapidly expand. Desire courses through him and you watch as his cock still glossy and semi hard stiffens sharply to full attention. 
"If you want to," you add, hand gently stroking him, feeling him throb under your palm. 
He doesn't let you finish. His hands cup your face in his large palms as he kisses you gently, licking into your mouth as you begin to lower yourself onto his thick length. 
"Are you sure?"
You whimper, body jerking as you take all of him from this angle, stretching and watching as Joel's head tips back, eyes still peering out at you. 
"Very," you promise him as his wide hands skate down your spine. "I love you so much, Joel."
"I love you too, baby," Joel says earnestly. "But if you think you need to do this for me-"
"I don't," you explain, and you let yourself surrender to the building pleasure. "I want this Joel. Wanna carry your baby."
Joel moans, brows saddling and you feel him start to thrust up into you, not holding back. 
"Does that turn you on?" You ask, amused that you've both discovered something new about each other today. 
"Yeah," Joel admits with a shy grin up at you. 
"I'll have to remember that," you tease before you feel him thrust up into you and a stripe of white hot pleasure goes up your core. 
Joel's arms hold you tightly to his chest, pinning you around the waist as your head falls to his shoulder. 
You two thrust against one another in the silence of your office, the only sound the traffic outside, your combined groans and the wet sounds of flesh as Joel drives himself up into you. 
Your body is naked save for the skirt you wear, like some daydream of his come to life. 
He slips his hand beneath your skirt and builds the pleasure there, fingers on the pearl of your clit as you ride him. His head is tilted back so he can watch your face, the way your head lolls back when he hits a really good spot, the way you whine a little when you're getting close. 
"Gonna come," you slur out, already on the precipice of another orgasm. 
"Fuck yeah you are," Joel says through grunts, watching your body jerk against his deepening thrusts.
You let out little whines as you chase your pleasure, your hands on his shoulders for purchase as you slide yourself along him. He feels so fucking good. 
"Doing so good baby," Joel says gently, stroking your hair back from your face as he bucks under you. He looks to where your bodies join, seeing the glossy curve of your inner thighs. "Keep going, keep going."
You do, you slide along his length as Joel's arms wrap around you, rocking into you groaning about how much he needs you, how much he loves you and you melt against him. 
You come with a shiver, body arching against his as he watches you, marveling at how gorgeous you look like that. 
Then your mouth finds his and you take him deeper, feeling his cock nudge your cervix. You hear your husband groaning, his damp mouth warm on your neck. 
"Come on, Joel," You whisper breathlessly against the shell of his ear, fingernails digging into his shoulder blades. "Fuck me pregnant."
"Fuck yeah, honey, I will," Joel begins to babble against your neck, his hips setting a brutal pace as you cling to him. "Gonna fill you up. Gonna give you a baby, everyone's gonna know you're mine and-"
Joel lets out a strangled cry as he releases, you feel him pulsing inside you, holding you tightly to him as he empties himself into you. Your entire body quivers as Joel comes, his body tightening and then slowly loosening, going boneless against you. 
You both breath heavily, foreheads pressed tightly against one another before Joel plants a soft kiss on your neck, your jaw and finally your waiting lips. The two of you gaze at one another before giggling gently. 
"I'm texting more often."
Still panting and giggling in the afterglow neither of you hear when Alex returns to the office. 
"Hey so lunch-"
Joel wraps his arms around you, shielding your bared chest from your co-worker as she opens the door and walks into your office. 
Alex takes in the scene, you shirtless on Joel's lap as he sits behind the desk. Both of you red-faced and looking guiltily at her. 
With her hand still on the doorknob Alex backs out of the room, closing the door, but not before adding a very smug:
"Glad my advice worked."
211 notes · View notes
henrioo · 4 months
Text
°•*⁀➷ SMAU: CROCODILE
꒰ WARNINGS ꒱ : TransReader (but can be read as cis because have only one mention about pregnancy), MALE READER, GAY RELATIONSHIP, MALE PRONOUNS, mentions to sugar daddy relationship (more like a joke), dark jokes (it's Robin after all), Buggy x Shanks x Mihawk and Buggy x Mihawk (is more a joke and fight to give more entertaining than really a shipp) age gap (not specified but Crocodile is older than reader and reader is older than Luffy, but none age is mentioned)
꒰ NOTES ꒱ : I decided to try make one SMAU because I really like the ones of @sanjisboyfie then thanks for the inspo, I don't know if I gonna make more but I really like this one. Enjoy!
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crocobaby posted:
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liked by MLuffy, Hawkeyes, Akaagami and 638,973
crocobaby_ helping him get late for work... But it is fine, he is the owner ;p
view all 20,327 comments
TheCrocodile you are always so troublesome...
╰ TheCrocodile I wasn't.
╰ crocobaby I didn't see you complaining...
ClownKing that's why you are always late...
╰ TheCrocodile say one more thing and you're gonna regret it
╰ ClownKing DON'T SAY THINGS LIKE THAT!
TheCrocodile posted:
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liked by Hawkeyes, Akaagami, QueenIVA and 291,083
TheCrocodile this boy was waiting for me finished the meeting so he could give me flowers... How can I say I'm a little old for that?
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crocobaby but you are my man, you deserve flowers 😔
╰ TheCrocodile I appreciate the flowers but I am not a teenager for that my dear
╰ crocobaby you never are going to be too would for me... And if I don't give you flowers what can I give to show my love to you?
╰ TheCrocodile find me in our room and I can show you some things I can think of...
MLuffy posted
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liked by RoroZoro, San, CatNami and 893,547
MLuffy me, my dad and my friend that dates my dad! Wait that makes him my dad too? How much dad's one person can have at the same time?
view all 40,754 comments
CatNami WTF IS (Y/N) DATING YOUR FATHER?? YOU INTRODUCED US SAYING THAT IS ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS LUFFY!
╰ MLuffy so? He is my friend and he dates my dad, he can't be both?
╰ CatNami I'm gonna just ignore that because (y/n) isn't that young too... BUT DAMN @crocobaby YOU GOT A SUGAR DADDY AND DON'T SAY TO US???
San by my count you have four dads if we count with Shanks... If you count the two boyfriends of Shanks then there are six dads... You probably have more dads than we all have together...
╰ ClownKing wtf you saying with two boyfriends??? @akaagami
╰ Hawkeyes 👁️👁️
╰ ClownKing YOU KNOW THAT HE WAS DATING BOTH OF US AT THE SAME TIME???
╰ Hawkeyes Actually probably is you that is dating two men at the same time, because I don't date Akaagami and only date you.
╰ Akaagami WTF YOU MEAN THAT YOU'RE WITH BUGGY????
╰ RoroZoro THAT FUCKING CLOWN??? SERIOUS DAD???
crocobaby posted
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liked by Hawkeyes, Mr0001, ROnico and 348,869
crocobaby Damn... He always knows the best places to take me...
view all 32,785 comments
TheCrocodile you deserve the most beautiful things in this world and I will be the men giving you that
╰ crocobaby I don't think there is anything more you could give at this point...
╰ TheCrocodile that is what you think. Let's see the future...
ROnico hope you enjoy your time there, it is gonna be more calm without Boss here 🤭
╰ TheCrocodile any complaints about?
╰ ROnico never sir
ClownKing posted
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liked by Hawkeyes, crocobaby, buggyfanclub and 1,647,536
ClownKing if they two gonna act like too teenagers in love I'm leaving right now
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TheCrocodile we actually didn't invite you... So please leave
╰ ClownKing you are fucking mean
Hawkeyes it could be worse, you could have a vacation with them because our sons are friends. Then you gonna be stuck with them because you tree are adults are you have to pretend that you not realize that they are fucking each other only with their eyes.
╰ crocobaby I kinda don't want to go on vacation with you anymore...
╰ Hawkeyes I agree, please don't.
╰ TheCrocodile You really need a boyfriend...
╰ Hawkeyes I have one.
╰ TheCrocodile The clown doesn't count.
crocobaby posted
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liked by MLuffy, Hawkeyes, ROnico and 2,347,743
crocobaby Okay... Maybe he hasn't given me all before... But now I definitely have everything I could wish
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TheCrocodile you are the only one that deserves all this
MLuffy are you giving me a brother now?!
╰ crocobaby DON'T FUCKING ENCOURAGE YOUR DAD HE'S JUST WAITING TO TALK ABOUT THIS WITH ME AGAIN
╰ TheCrocodile you can't run now, we live at the same roof.
ROnico I really hope you enjoy your honeymoon and it would be horrible if Crocodile dies but if we think in a positive way you would be a billionaire and probably a boss more chill than him 🤭
╰ TheCrocodile Well I can't say I wouldn't pretend my death only to have eternal vacations...
╰ crocobaby Please don't, I'm supposed to be the househusband, not you!
╰ TheCrocodile so demanding...
QueenIVA SO HAPPY FOR YOU CROCO-BOY AND (Y/N)-KUN, WHEN I GONNA GOT A INVITE TO TALK TO YOUR LOVELY HUSBAND ABOUT YOUR PAST TOGETHER?? I HAVE A LOT OF STORIES
╰ TheCrocodile I'm gonna send the police after you if you show here
╰ crocobaby I'm kinda curious now... And I'm really interested in those stories...
╰ TheCrocodile no you not.
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146 notes · View notes
inkskinned · 2 years
Text
but you couldn't, like, see a gay person kissing.
it was alright that i had been catcalled at 12 years old. it was alright that i had been followed and groped at 15. it was okay men were leery and treacherous. it was okay when a man asked me my age and when i said 18, he said, that age is my favorite.
don't you like feeling sexy? i love action movies, but i often have an internal tally of how often a camera will begin at someone's hips and travel to her face only as if by accident. weirdly, you can't show too-much asscrack in the same movie, even if it was the style in the nineties. sort of only apply a tasteful sprinkling of asscrack.
i am wearing a body type that is very easily sexualized. it's a compliment, you'll miss it. it is not his fault, i am told - and then usually with this assurance, someone will compare me to an object. i am, by the way, not using "i become an object" metaphorically. well, you wouldn't wear a precious watch in a dangerous city - i am the watch, in this situation. can you blame a thief for taking a jewel if it was just left out in the open? i think my personhood is the jewel, but sometimes also it is pain. a dog sees a steak. i like this one because it does refer to men as dogs, even if it does literally compare me to a piece of meat (which is, you know, somehow worse than being a dog. at least call me a bitch, babe).
it's inappropriate to show two men kissing, but it's totally normal to hear that "best" age for childbirth is 15. (it's not, by the way. try 20's & 30's. do your fucking reading). and on tv - let's cut from a murder mystery where a woman is shown brutally bloodied, carved into pieces (only pg-13) into a tampon commercial where she runs around, happy and fluttering, refusing to use the word period, white pants abounding. periods: gross, icky. violence, though, is just a gendered currency.
so it's like - you say "can we please treat women like they're people and stop cutting their heads off in advertisements" and then it's like. no actually we needed that woman's bellybutton to sell drain fluid don't like it don't look. and you say "can you please not make every latin person a drug dealer holy shit" and they're like. unfortunately if we don't make the latin person a drug dealer we literally will go rabid. and you say "okay can we at least agree you super don't need to use racist epithets why is this even a conversation we're still having" and they're like. actually my child is a make-a-wish kid and his only wish was that i get to use words that make your skin crawl and if you don't let me use the words it's because you love cancer don't you.
so it's kind of a lost cause. because when something is complicated even a little bit, you find yourself trying to explain that the solution isn't make women cover up, it's that the idea "sexualization of nonconsenting parties is wrong" can also hold hands with the idea "not every expression of fondness is sexual in nature, nor is nonhegemonic sexual expression somehow more inflammatory or inappropriate than its counterpart"- and both of those ideas can also hold hands with "the male gaze is rarely censored despite the massive amounts of societal harm it imposes." but like, that's a big thought. let's just slap "pg-13" on the movie because they actually use the word lesbian. and let's cross our fingers and hope no kid figures out they're lgbt+ before college - otherwise they have access to literally no resources, since even google will censor the results in case they're pornographic. now, if you wanted to know how to hide a body...
when i was a kid i used to keep my eyes on my toes while walking past bra stores, feeling uncomfortable. it was gross to look at ladies, i knew that much. the way the women were posed was... not for me. not even for the people shopping. it was weird. i don't think anyone actually there-for-the-product was like yeah this is inspiring.
and i remember in high school my friends and i were still talking about how uncomfortable we felt in victoria's secret, shuffling our way out into the new england chill. little yellow leaves around our feet. a guy held the door open for us. a few seconds later, he jogged up after us. we were so startled we turned to look. "sorry," he said. "i just wanted to ask how old you all are." we were young then, so we lied and told him we were older. we'd talk about this later - we all thought maybe one of us had dropped our wallet or something. he smiled dolefully. "i just wanted to say you all are fucking beautiful. you have amazing tits on you."
sometimes i wonder. what if one fraction of the effort they put into making sure no gay thing ever occurs onscreen just went into controlling and educating their own fucking population. now wouldn't that be something.
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