#i thought i was ok w it but its rly a horrible feeling | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

arcadequeerz · 2 years

Text

Just thoughts.

Dad died on October 18th. A lot more people showed up to be there, then i thought would of. Lots of people from his church, and his brother n his wife- n some cousins I haven’t seen for years, and my moms sister. I think the worst part was when they turned off the ventilator, and he started to make noise- and that’s the moment it kind of hit me what was happening. Wasn’t fun hearing it, wasn’t fun seeing my mom sob over him and my sister cry.

Will be having a service for him at his church, in November. The church is paying for it all n providing food- which we can’t thank them enough for. Expecting a lot more people then I expected to be coming- I had no idea how many people loved him.

And it kind of just. feels weird. Had a small memorial for him at the church w his bible study friends, and they were sobbing, and telling fond stories about him- n talking about how kind and sweet he was to everyone. And it kind of just hit me how: it feels like we’re mourning two different people.

Because I don’t understand: hw he could treat them so kindly, and care for them- and then come home and treat my family n I so horribly. I know he loved me and I know he cared about us, but I don’t kno w why we couldn’t get that too. I don’t know why he couldn’t of treated us like that and told us he loved us at home, and told me how proud he was of me when he was here, instead of all the times he called me useless to my face because I forgot to do the dishes or something.

I hear about how he talked about us all the time, and we meant so much to him and its just. feels detached and like I’m hearing about someone else's dad n not mine. I know he loved me, he told me as much the last time i heard him speak. Told me he was proud of me, told me he just wanted me to be happy, and do something with my life- and all i could do was nod and cry because I don't know why he couldn’t of told me that before it got to this.

Told me the last time i heard him talk, that I'd always be his daughter even if I ‘wasn’t anymore’ and i wanted to tell him I’m not- but didn’t seem right. And in a stupid sense I wish I could of been that, and my mom says he never cared, and he loved me all the same: but I just don’t know why he couldn’t of said that instead of That- or why he couldn’t of Told me that Himself.

And I feel mad- because I don’t know why we couldn’t of had that dad those people from church love so much, and talk so fondly about- and I hate feeling like this because its not like I can ask him! I just gt left all this and I don’t know what to do with all of this now.

I just kind of feel numb and detached from all of it, and everyone. yes I’ve cried but I don’t think its been enough- because my family keeps asking me if I'm ok, n when i say im ‘fine’ they give me weird looks. I don’t think I should be fine, i should be inconsolable, i should be sobbing, my dad just died but I rly can’t.

Kind of feels like everything's falling apart, but it probably has been for the last several years, this is just the thing that might bring it all down around me n im just kinda too tired to try and pull myself out of the way. Feels like I’m jsut sitting here- waiting for something horrible to happen, like the next: awful thing to happen because things just keep getting worse.

Anyways. it feels like the universe hates me. so just.

#||Dnt Reb/og plz||#Cade.vnt #just me rambling. about things. n feelings.#n i didn't even go on about shit w the church but whatever i'm too tired 2 type more n theres alrewady so mch shit on this post

6 notes · View notes

volfoss · 2 years

Text

hi teehee kof rant (mai centric bc i have a problem etc) below the cut and all that

burden of being a mai fan is having to see a million horrible pieces of content in each kof game (and fatal fury too my god) but it genuinely drives me insane how they write her in a lot of the games. like its 50% of the woah shes a conventionally attractive woman and thats all the character development and depth shes given. Any other time its just maybe 45% "kyaa andy" and 5% lets have her have a nice time w her team. now like. im biased due to hating andy (due to how he really treats her a lot of the time and just how her character is so so based around him instead of letting her be an actual character)

now i know that its like a part of her character that shes super in love w andy and SUPER feminine (other than the ending for fatal fury special where she remarks that she needs to be less masculine) but it really feels like SNK just poured all the budget and effort into seeing how sexy they could make her/the physics of her animation (again iykyk). esp considering her development section on the wiki (of heres who her boobs and ass are based off of, how when they introduced her ""swaying bosom", the developers were awestruck". like i understand fully that they are trying to yk. make her a sex symbol (which worked a little too well imo). it really bled into how a fair bit of fans treat her as just a hot body and never really consider her personality or literally anything other than how her clothes fit or how they can make her outfit worse.

but it really to me feels that the devs were like ok. 4 traits should work: mean to other women sometimes (mostly over appearance), SUPER irrational (which i dont believe but im also like. overthinking pro here, ill elaborate later if i remember), in LOVE with andy, and hot. occasionally they try and throw in a bimbo angle. i feel they really ignore a lot of things they COULD touch on (ie literally ANYTHING with her past, how she gets along w literally anyone on andys team outside of andy (we again. get tiny hints of it but rly not much), or literally ANYTHING outside of the few traits we very vaguely get.

so many of her endings are just either SO andy centric or just her getting drunk. and thats literally it. not even to get into the team stories which are normally a bit better (96's has made me INSANE for weeks tho) but esp 99, that was really disappointing. that one really felt like they were treating her as a footnote and butt of the joke (which happens a lot of people being like wow girl you are crazy about andy) but it feels like in some of the endings (2003 comes to mind, where you get a tiny hint of woah theyre putting in that she cares about her friends and then its like no lol actually its just all about andy)

again i understand how the way that she is written doesnt really allow for a really good read on her as a character (her personality section on the wiki is fucking abysmal. tldr of it is wow shes cheerful, 2 full paragraphs dedicated to how much she loves andy, shes a "traditional and ideal japanese beauty" and like. a tiny note on how she gets along w the womens team/terry and joe). but she really does have more than that of just genuinely being a very kind person and very goofy, as well as a very talented and dedicated person.

so what rly irks me (this is not number one but girls need to get their thoughts on her past out somehow and by god im doing it here) is how her past isnt really ever touched on except for tiny hints here and there. sure we get info on how her grandfather trained her and the tiniest inkling of stuff on her parents (that theyre dead) and how andy came to train with her grandfather when they were both pretty young. but they really dont ever elaborate on how her grandfather basically passing all of her training off to his friend (who is yk. a canonical creep and lecherous old man trope to a T) and training andy impacted her. we never learn how she handled her parents death. or even her grandparents death. or even the enormous weight of being the last shiranui ninja. its all focused on wow lol she fell in love w andy super early on and thats IT really. MI2 (pretty sure. might have been MI 1) does go into a tiny bit of detail on her grandfather training her to move silently and bribing her into that with anything she really ever wanted, and how that even impacted her with the beginning of MI2, where she uses training from her grandfather to throw the letter at Andy, catching him by surprise. but we really dont get a lot of introspection on that in really any of the mainline games (or manga that ive read, all of the ones ive read just have her plotlines be the same as the game (of half andy and half woah hot lady)

not to mention again in the 96 team stories, she mentions that after King says she also cannot participate in KOF, she says this:

^ which literally lines that drive me insane that they NEVER elaborate on. surely her childhood had to be lonely with her being an only child (presumably) and it not really mentioning any friends she has outside of the womens team and a TINY bit of terry and joe. which god. there could have been SO much potential with her and terrys relationship. we literally could have had besties but instead its normally used for a joke of wow mai is SO scary about andy oh nooo. and same w joe. i think tbh the fatal fury movie honestly nailed how i would have their relationship in an ideal world, with them just teasing each other and being a bit bitchy but in a fun friendship way yk?

in regards to the womens team i do normally enjoy how they handle the stuff with her and them, its VERY clear she cares about and loves yuri and king, and even chizuru (i hold the 96 ending SO close to my heart tbh) and just literally if they could pass the bechdel test for literally once in their life, it would be ideal.

mai just genuinely has a lot of potential in terms of writing and literally if u just go through her quotes its just really clear to see she doesnt get that potential ever explored (esp in some of the fatal fury stuff, where shes having to fend men off from touching her or hitting on her.)

tldr snk hire me i understand her etc

#twist rambles #i have to put my like 30 page analysis doc to use SOMEHOW and if its making angry tumblr posts then so be it

16 notes · View notes

menalez · 1 year

Note

Hi! Sorry if this is an inconvenient ask and feel free to ignore.

I have no clue if I'm actually a lesbian... I tried making out with men and even had sex twice but wasn't attracted to them at all and the sex was just horrible. I kind of forced myself into it just to prove that I was not "defective". I think that, during my early teens, I might have had crushes on men (much older than me), but those might have been platonic or an attempt on making myself feel heterosexual. I thought I was bisexual for a long time, but I've only ever enjoyed kissing other women. I just never tried sex with women... It feels weird claiming that I'm a lesbian since I've had sex with men before, though. I don't really know...

you should probably try figuring out if you had crushes on those men older than you or if you mistook sth platonic (or maybe even something that was even familial in a way???) for sth romantic/sexual. the sex w men being horrible doesnt tell me much bc statistically speaking they generally just suck in bed so idk if u mean they were bad in bed or if it was horrible for reasons more relating to u (like u didnt want it or felt uncomfortable/disgusted w what was happening, for example)

ALSO just gonna say that actually being with a woman can rly help clear things up. based on what ur saying ur either heavily SSA-leaning bi or a lesbian,,, i think with more experience the answer should be clear. if ur actual experiences are limited and not so helpful, think of your fantasies too. do you exclusively fantasise about women? has that always been the case? have you tried fantasising about men? what was the reaction in that case? figuring out the answers to those questions can rly help clarify things for u. also remember that regardless of what it turns out ur sexuality is, u dont have to be w men just bc its the Encouraged path for women. if u prefer women or only want to be with women or only enjoy being with women, its ok to choose women. even if it turns out u have some minimal attraction to men

1 note · View note

blurays · 3 years

Text

i feel like i need to remember ppl have it worse than me and make it through

because i know people think im self centered and think my own problems are the only ones which like i dont think that but if it comes off that way its the same effect

but its like every Little bad thing feels like the end of the world im not one of those grateful terminally ill people who enjoy every little thing now i think when ur already horribly depressed its instead just. every good thing actually makes you sad too and every bad thing makes you feel cursed

idk if i over think or barely think abt things

and in regards to how bad i have it

again im like oh i whine so much people make it thru worse

but sometimes i barely think abt how bad ive had it

like as in the pandemic has been weird for me hearing people complaining about not having close contact for (under a) year and im like well. the last time i had a friend in real life i was. twelve

and if u count a friend i talked to outside of school think it drops down to like eleven and im 22 now and my parents have ranged from neglectful narcissistic to gaslighting to just. maybe they love me but they dont say it i dont feel it idk we're more roommates than anything else i think. and its hard to feel like im being honest that they’re bad because i used to think i had to lie for pity but i mean i havent been to school since i was 12, so...

like its ✨embarrassing✨ but im so incredibly lonely i have been for a really really really long time its why when i have a gf or whatever theyre the only thing i care abt which everyone including them understandably is like shut the fuck up but rlly im at the point where a mutual randomly dms me hoping im ok and i burst into tears because people are nice (here usually) but i feel like its just cause they feel bad for me and i dont even believe that anyone thinks abt me if im not talking which is probably why i feel like im suffocating if i cant tweet or say smth whatever 3x to the same ppl like ik ppl think i love attention because im a cunt or a leo or whatever but i rly think im just trying to like not die of loneliness its not even just the like lack of rl friends for uhm ten plus years its like i dont even go anywhere except the doctor or the store or whatever the people who ive occasionally seen like when i helped with scouts one time the woman said i know you hate hugs but i want to and i was like what and realized i just. dont even know how to react to physical contact cause again i mean christ i didnt know being touch starved was an actual like Thing beyond me being sad about it i guess but yeah i really only get touched at the doctor or if i ask for help when surgery leaves me particularly disabled which is ✨painful and humiliating✨ i think when my mom massaged my back a couple times after hospital beds had me like super fucked up tensed was like . the nicest thing ive experienced in . well yeah 11 years and its not like i can remember before that ive just never been physically close w someone and thats not even Normal and im not going to be Loved any time soon like i cant even work still i just dont interact w anyone making friends irl sounds horrifying and impossible idk how to act w people after this long and tht feels supported by ppl lately

and thats just loneliness if uve ever read like one post from me u know the. illness thoughts

im tired its weird because i dont think i couldve imagined ever being 22 when i was 12 i think i was really planning to die before that but i didnt and now i might not ever be 25 or 30 and i dont know i think that makes me really sad but i think if they told me it was happening i might be just. a little relieved because im so tired i wish i didnt have to choose to die like cause id Rather be loved touched happy but that doesnt feel realistic ever and im tired of this i think id just rather it be over lol

sorry if u read all this and thanks .

3 notes · View notes

autisticstarseed · 4 years

Text

sorry to sound cringe or w/e the fuck but. half the fandom shit you all whine abt being unhealthy is fully normal behavior, we’ve just gotten too used to hiding our like. basic humanity from each other? fiction affects people yall, its supposed to do that, you are supposed to read a story and feel smth, its supposed to engage you, thats 100% how it works, being invested in a fantasy world is literally..... just normal human shit and what fiction straight up exists to do. like. we’ve done it for a while now. we have imagination for a reason. we are supposed to use it in our daily lives. its a human skill. literally why would ppl even make stories if not to impact others. you all cannot in the same fucking breath agree, that certain content which harms others and glorifies awful shit is wrong and should be retaliated against because fiction ofc affects reality, and then go on to do your stupid whiny funnyman fandom cringe bullshit any time you decide people are letting themselves have too much fun in a way that makes you uncomfortable but doesnt hurt you.

like sdjfjsdf okay we get it you dont have interests outside of the 5-10 tumblr accepted ones, you’re a cool unfeeling social media robot that acts like every other dumbass jester craving validation for being abrasive and uncharming to the rest of society but hey at least you can make a shitpost right i get it i get it sure, but its truly not my job to keep validating your personality of being a hypercritical nihilist and i need for you to understand. it is normal. to like media. many different kinds of media. it all exists for people to like it. stop exaggerating and strawmanning every single person you come across that expresses their interests in a divergent way as this like. horribly unhealthy disconnected nerd who is LOST in a fantasy TM and lives in their basement and jerks off to their waifu instead of talking to real people and is ~hurting themselves~ with their lack of social endeavors or w/e. thats not fucking real you idiot passion is regular, its not anybody elses fault you killed yours off bc you wanted to make certain ppl think ur cool. its normal to project, its normal to feel emotional attachments, its normal to ‘let yourself’ like the ‘cringe’ medias, its normal to buy merch or make your own, its normal to make long and depthful content (forreal so much of this ‘support’ for the hard work of artistry can be so conditional and hollow from you guys), its normal to discuss stories from a realism standpoint because again thats generally the intention, and its. just normal to like shit that isnt real sometimes. it rly is. ideas and thoughts can be valuable. fantasies arent completely worthless.

‘’escaping reality’’ with distraction and immersion Can become unhealthy but it doesnt mean you are literally incapable of having critical depthful valuable thoughts on the reality you live in just bc you find daily joy in something unreal as well and you are honest to god the weird one if you cant get that. especially if you try to use peoples harmless passions as a way to like. jab at their harmless identities or their harmless appearance or their harmless fucking ‘i think harmless behaviors should be supported and left alone’ stances. like wow i am ever so fucking Sorry that the CRAZY TM su kins and marvel stim blogs and theatre kids and tiktok cosplayers creating all this cringey content thats meaningful to them and full of effort and passion just Really truly gives you hives bc of your wretched personality and weird fabricated dramatic assumptions abt their personal life and your inability to positively socialize with nonjudgmental people anymore but like honestly at least they act like a real person and their art and fun matters more to me than your bratty cringe feelings ok those mean dick to me they hold no value in my mind and they dont have to its not my responsibility to baby you for your judgments they dont even equate imo like oh my god just go get some interests you loser maybe it’ll cure your bastarditis !

#original #long post #ok to rb light ever y mother fucke rup #like idk just imagine being in class and the teachers like 'what did you think about to kill a mockingbird' and some kids like #kinda cringe that you're making us listen to you talk abt ur favorite book in class......#teacher gives an analysis and the kids liek DUDE YOU SAT DOWN AND WROTE THAT ALL OUT LMFAOOOOO #DID U JUST SIT THERE FOR HOURS DOING THA..T......... OMG GO OUTSIDDDE #like. the literal only honest to god 'cringe' thing i can imagine in this situation is the ppl who act #genuinely devastated and like they are being oppressed bc someone made them cringe.#like.#get up bitch ur fine shfskDJFSDFKLSD

3 notes · View notes

doyouevenshipbr0 · 4 years

Text

rewatched legend of korra and i would like to get out some unpopular opinions. this is gonna be long.

-mako is literally not bad. i actually like him a lot. the only season i dont like him in is s2 but the rest hes lowkey a king.... (not my fav dont get me wrong. but he’s misunderstood:/ imo)

-makorra. there. i said it. they obv killed it in s2 but omggg i loved them in s1🥺 and even in s3 and s4 i think they got a lil spark. i do understand however that they kinda bring the worst out of each other so maybe theyre not a perfect match! i just think they have good chemistry. ill leave it at that.

-korras*mi is not fleshed out😭in the show!!! in the comic they are a cute couple but like them getting together in the end didnt make much sense to me. like in s4 their only significant interactions were asami saying her hair was cute, and korra only writing to asami. then they just HAPPENED?! yea idk. not rly buying it. but i do understand that the creators prolly kinda had to tip toe around their relationship bc ya know. nickelodeon. but like i said the comics did them justice❤️

-bolin and opal as a couple are boring:/ yea. not much more to say here. cute but boring.

-su yin is ELITE. i dont think this is an unpopular opinion but like she might be my fav character. def at least top 5.

-ranking the seasons: s1, s4, s3, s2. i dont think this is super unpopular either but yea.

-zaheer??? is?????? RIGHT??? hes hardly a villain ok im sorry idc.

-why does tenzin not have darker skin?? and why is kya not a little lighter? like they rly just said “carbon copies of katara and aang” like come on i think we can spice it up a lil more. still love all the kataang kids tho!!!!!! theyre all up there for my fav characters.

-ok. did anyone else notice how much faster traveling is in lok?????? getting from the south pole to the north pole literally took an ENTIRE SEASON in atla which i believe was at least a month. but in korra they go across the world in like one ep. idk seems weird.

-still do not understand how there are more bison. not complaining. but yea.

-kai and jinora is kind of a weird couple. im SORRY but i said it for atla and ill say it for lok, theyre KIDS! literally like 12. why do they feel the need to pair CHILDREN up. idk its just a BIT odd to me!

-fight scenes are SO much better in lok than atla holy SHIT.

-lavabending does not make much sense to me. kinda think thats mostly bc im dumb tho lol.

-korra=aang. i feel like this debate is so polarizing like ppl almost always love one and hate the other but i deadass like them almost completely equally.

-that being said, korrawouldbeataanginafight. idc.

-i b like :/ when i find out the og team avatar were not the best parents. i do like that they made them human and flawed but like:/ aang and toph seemed...........just flat out bad parents😭 makes me sad. but thats life ig!

-bumi..........shouldve stayed a nonbender. idk i rly liked that ab his character!!!

-ikki>jinora

-meelo=the worst

-it was weird seeing cars and radios and phones in lok. i get it. future=more technology but idk. it was weird. i dont think i liked it.

-varrick is king

-that being said!!!^^^ varrick and zhu li getting together also felt weird lmao. felt a lil forced. cute, but a smidge forced.

-asami was so capable of kicking major ass idk why we didnt see her do it more!!!

-i. want. more. PRO BENDING!

-i HATE!!!!!!! the new airbending outfits. hate them. a lot. hate.

-wing and wei were unsung HEROES. they were so dope and had like 10 lines total.

-also amon was lowkey onto sum too......like maybe dont take ppls bending away but... idk im js......

-90% of the eyebrows in lok were absolutely ridiculous and horrible. bolin, mako, tenzin, bumi, UNALAQ. like. u dont gotta do all that!

-they were kind of...... making bending a broken system in lok??? if that makes sense?? i get it, they were just trying to expand the possibilities but idk. lavabending, the waterbending that gets rid of bad spirits, flying, the spiritual projection thing, being able to bloodbend outside of a full moon, taking bending away w bloodbending?? plus they made things like metalbending and lightning bending SO common like those were supposed to be rly rare i thought? idk!!! maybe its just me!

-^that being said, as i mentioned earlier, bending is overall way cooler and better in lok.

#lok #legend of korra #personal

2 notes · View notes

penny-anna · 4 years

Text

ok me & friends finished watching Buffy s1 last night and it was my first time watching it in a while and here are some thoughts:

Welcome to the Hellmouth/The Harvest: I really struggle to properly judge this whole 2-parter bcos i find it boring tbh but part of that is that everything it does later episodes of buffy did better and i watched it for the first time out of order. idk how it would be to watch it ‘fresh’. however the friends i watched it with who was new to buffy didn’t love it so. 6/10

The Witch: enjoyed this one a lot more than I expected? I think on first watch i found it kind of dumb and it DOES play kind of weird in light of how buffy later depicted witchcraft but still. it’s solid and tbh a better intro to the tone of the series than the first 2 eps. i think part of the reason i didn’t love it as a kid is the full implications of amy’s relationship with her mother just went over my head. 7/10

Teacher’s Pet: I used to think that this was my no 1 least favourite ep of Buffy and I don’t think i stand by that any more, however I still find the whole concept of it stupid and ??? and the fact that it ends w the girls making fun of xander for being a virgin is just unpleasant. dislike. 1/10

Never Kill a Boy on the First Date: this one is fine ig. i tend to forget it exists. another of those ‘later eps did this exact thing better’ deals plus it feels a bit redundant when you’re watching it out of order/re-watching and know what the twist is. THAT SAID new-to-buffy friend did not see the twist coming and expressed surprised when the ‘anointed one’ died so evidently it’s doing something right. buffy’s one-ep love interest is a dick tho. 5/10

The Pack: ok apparently this one is really unpopular and I don’t think that’s entirely fair, i think it’s legit very creepy (probably the scariest ep of the season) and I have always liked it a lot, HOWEVER on re-watch it struck me that the premise is a hm (probably accidentally) racist allegory so i like it a lot less now. 6/10

Angel: hm yeah what i said above re ‘later episodes did this better’. this one holds a special place in my heart for the Angel reveal and the final sequence w Darla and the guns and the strobe lights is legit rly cool. it’s am ambitious one but i think it falls a bit flat. 7/10

I Robot, You Jane: I am DYING to know how this one came off in the 90s bcos the whole premise is just SO stupid by 2019 standards. like I want to like it, it’s perfectly competent and Moloch is one of the show’s more interesting demons (& i think also the first one? neat!), his MO is so creepy, the reveal that he’s built a robot body for himself (with the HORNS) is legit cool and also Miss Calendar is there and I love her. HOWEVER. the whole ‘internet panic’ thing. willow inexplicably reading aloud to herself as she’s typing. i cannot enjoy it. 6/10

The Puppet Show: I cannot BELIEVE I had forgotten about this episode?? to get it out of the way Sid the Dummy is creepy (not in a creepy dummy way, he’s just a creep) but aside from that the mystery in this one is just SO well constructed, the twist about Sid is OUTSTANDING, the talent show stuff is all so good and so funny and Principal Snyder is introduced (LOVE that guy) AND has one of my no 1 fav Snyder moments (’There are things I will not tolerate. Students loitering around campus after school, horrible murders with hearts being removed, and also smoking.’) this is some GOOD shit. love it. 8/10 (would be a 9 if sid wasn’t a creep)

Nightmares: another very ambitious one that doesn’t quite work for me. it sort of, moves its concept back & forth between comedy and drama in a way that I’m sure could have been made to work but just feels a bit confused. that said as with The Witch the implications of this one REALLY went over my head when I first watched it, the reveal about the ‘Ugly Man’ is SO dark and so well foreshadowed through the episode. the parts that work work really well I just wish it could like. make up its mind if it’s a comedy or not. 7/10

Out of Mind, Out of Sight: really like this one. it’s so sad and so creepy. love Cordelia’s development (side note watching this one back to back w Nightmares is bizarre given HOW (intentionally) dumb all her scenes in that one are). love the invisible girl & the reveal at the end w the school for invisible kids that they nEVER COME BACK TO (not a complaint i’m into it). 9/10

Prophecy Girl: another v ambitious one that doesn’t quite come together, that said the strong parts are really strong and when it goes hard it goes REALLY hard. has a kind of, cinematic scope that previous eps don’t have? really good finale. sets the tone for the rest of the series. good shit. 8/10

25 notes · View notes

guroshitsuji · 4 years

Note

All you do these days is follow horrible people out of spite, I really thought you were better than that. Almost miss being mutuals but you and your blog are full of red flags.

i have a feeling i know who you are n i almost miss being mutuals too but its probs for the best if u rly think this black n white. cus i don’t follow “horrible people” out of spite. i don’t think anyone i follow is horrible and ive yet to find a reason to unfollow anyone other than this mob mentality that once someone has been accused of something via a callout post w no evidence, then they are that thing , no questions asked. ppl keep sending me anons abt my new mutuals and i keep asking for evidence that they are these horrible things and i always turn up empty handed. ive talked about this before. x , x . and ive talked abt this before too but its so like .... nonsensical that you’re all anons. if you rly miss being mutuals or if any of you guys rly cared enough ud just talk to me directly. how are you gonna expect me to it take seriously when ur saying rly confrontational things or rly heavy accusations and ur quiet literally anonymous. idk how everyone else is ok with that but im not.. i just cant get behind it. these things matter to me and if im going to break mutuals w someone i need more than a rly aggressive anon, i want to be talked to like a person and explained in detail all this evidence that ive yet to see. like my dms are always open and i am happy to talk these things out privately !! there is no reason for me to be having a onesided public conversation like this !! id esp want to talk abt these red flags you think im full of, bcus as far as i know i have not changed whatsoever and thats a big accusation . i would absolutely love if it someone could talk to me abt smth ive done thats hurt people bcus i rly cant think of one thing and i dont want to be doing that !!!

anyways this is too much energy and time to waste on stuff like this. this is the last time i will ever answer an anon like this... ive said this before but ill say it again . just mssg me. frm now on if i receive an anon abt my mutuals i will delete them and i will not publicly acknowledge them.. im sorry that i demand a little respect in situations w sensitive topics but its rly what i think is fair. and sry to literally anyone other than the asker whos had to read thru this and for all the needless drama, this will not be a problem again, i promise

#kinda ... worried this anon sent me my last anon too #took it as a joke but under this like tone ? it feels kinda weird.#anyways this is a long one so its under the cut #its always so draining to get these asks #Anonymous

4 notes · View notes

fmdromeo · 5 years

Text

hi cuties ! i've finally caught a break from this new semester , & adjusting to it has definitely been easier than i thought , but i probably will be slower in terms of plotting & threading still until the holidays roll around ! i hope everyone has been doing well :> this lil post is in regards to our event , and under the cut you'll find what both romeo bae [ origin's maknae ] & sohn aerin [ femme fatale's main vocalist ] will be up to in regards to the actual concert & the afterparty ! give this a lil like if you'd like me to msg you about plotting , but please feel free to im me if anything in particular stands out to you ! thank u sm for reading .

note : all usual threads will be put ON HOLD until the event is over , just to make things easier for me ! uwu

crossed out plots means they are officially taken , italicized plots are pending !

romeo bae :

my goblin baby boy is going to have three stages in total , each having one song to perform besides origin closing off the concert , so he’s going to be performing seven songs in total ! of course , he’s going to be tired as fuck , but origin’s schedules have somewhat prepared him for this , and it feels like any other normal instance where origin has to perform . so romeo isn’t too ... shocked or anything lol he kind of figured this is would happen ! anyways , he’s still pretty juiced for his stages and hopes to make the most fun of it , at least . that is until the after party ! romeo is probably gonna go all out [ when is he .. not ] for the party because he needs to kick the fuck back and chill out for a second . he’s definitely going to pregame right after the concert ends ! if u need weed , romeo is ur guy ! he’s gonna be in and out of the party randomly getting high ..... somewhere , somehow , so tag along if thats ur thing . overall , he’s gonna work his butt off and then chill and have fun ! onto the specific plots for him .

romeo is the most aussie mf out there , so he is definitely going to be in the pool sporting some designer trunks ! he’s a water baby so if you wanna just chill and swim , play a pool game or have him teach ur muse to swim , he’s ur dude

romeo is naturally super competitive so he’s going 2 have the time of his life playing pool or beer pong , his personal faves !! come join his team or play against him pls !

if he’s not swimming and outselling ariel in the pool , he’s gonna be drinking . like a madman , so if ur muse wants a drinking buddy or have him expose them to drinking , he’s def gonna have a cup in hand at all times lmfao

and now if he’s not drinking , then i know the kid is getting high 4 sure , somehow nd somewhere . romeo prefers to smoke too but he probably has a handful of edibles shoved into his pocket or sum .. hit him up if you wanna have a sesh somewhere or get ur muse stoned for the first time w him , he loves that shit

this boy is the reason blueface wrote thotianna but wbk ? hit romeo up if u wanna hookup or just makeout for a long time .. sum like that cause the thot is gonna show up and show out , so if ur muse needs to ~relax~ or wants 2 be corrupted by satan himself , romeo is here 2 provide that

it’s obvious origin is always overworked , and it shows on romeos face alot too . he’s probably gonna be high or drunk , most likely both , but maybe he rambles to ur muse about how tired he is of all this ?? and probably open up about how sad he feels most of the time but uh yeah !

romeo loves 2 get fucked up wbk but ur muse cant even handle anything like that too much , so now he has to fuckin BABYSIT them ? he’s annoyed nd pissed off , but he wont risk dispatch getting a hold of a juicy lil story so he’ll put up w it for now , but u owe him !!!

sohn aerin :

aeri , like romeo , has a handful of stages too ! she’s going to have four in total , and will be performing seven songs in total ! she’s honestly really happy about having a lot of stages ? it definitely beats having to perform the same one (1) song all the time , plus she gets to wear cute little outfits and have people look at her so .. thats that on that . despite it being obvious hard work , she’s honestly really happy for the first time in months for the concert to showcase more of femme fatale , and she loves performing with her members too ! big bonus is all the lovely collab stages uwu she’s also really giddy for the after party so she can dress up like the true lil thotty she is ? she’s going to have lots of fun , make horrible decisions and be super out of it ! aeri doesnt have the best alcohol tolerance but like .. thats not gonna stop her from getting shitfaced lmfao . she’s a rly cute drunk if i do say so myself .. but yeah ! she’s also gonna be getting high nd things of that nature too . overall she’s going to really enjoy the concert and the afterparty too ! onto the plots !!

aeri used to be an excellent swimmer and now she kind of .. cant ? she bought a cute bikini tho , and the world needs to see it . she sees ur muse can swim pretty well and asks them to teach her the basics again ?? she j wants to take thotty pool pics :/

she will also be highkey drunk out of her mind chilling in the jacuzzi , maybe ur muse sees her and goes to check up on her if shes ok ?? she will be like this , as a ref picture

the main vocalist is gna jump out with karaoke !! pls join her sing early 2000s bops or sum .. or tell her to stop singing HHH

besides singing , shes also gonna be dancing ??? pls come join her she just wants to dance w everyone !!!!!! if ur muse wanted a lap dance , she can also provide that winkity wonkity

she’s going to be doing shots like her life depends on it , if ur muse likes to drink or hasnt , shes ur girl !! shes also gonna b doin body shots as well :~)

i lov havin my muses do stuff together so shes probably gonna get a joint or something from romeo SJJNJDG come join w her on the roof of the mansion or like wherever ... thank u

shes also gonna be showin up in full Thot mindset so she will be hookin up and makin out w whoever is down to !!! hit her up ?????

wbk femme fatale promotions and comebacks esp this year are a little ... weird and its been bugging aeri since its happened , maybe she confides in ur muse randomly [ or not ] about her feelings about that ? in regards to women in general in the industry and how shes pretty terrified of the day her and the group will be shoved aside hhhh

like i said , although aeri can drink well , shes not a good drunk and gets drunk fast so ur muse has to now babysit her !!!! lmao have fun and good luck !!!!!

#fmdcall #fmdgsr2019 #| i hate buying books for school sm so im ignoring having to do that rn cause im confused...............................#| me ? not making a diff post on aeris acc ? fake as hell

6 notes · View notes

ursoself-satisfying · 5 years

Text

All Things Must Pass

this was a request!!! hes so young here wow

Joe Mazzello x F!Reader, sad/comfort fluff

A/N: i have so little time to write this was a struggle,,, i projected a lot onto this fic, using the language i use when im in a negative headspace n such so i hope it doesnt thro anyone off,,, i went thru a lot of what i felt then wrote that cus i deal w mental health issues n tried to portray what i go thru in a semi-accurate way but not one so specific its not readable u kno??? y'all that peep my references here tho get bonus points

Warnings: none rly,,, its kinda vague n sad like dealing w not discussing whats wrong n such,,,,, nothing bad tho,, not even any language wow!!! jk one language wh00ps

The warm mug in your hand didn’t improve your mood. The steam of the drink drifted up from the contents and swirled in intricate patterns near your face. You pursed your chapped lips and blinked your drying eyes. A feeling had been swelling in you for days, but you couldn’t quite identify it yet. With soft blankets curled around you and your body folded up on the couch, you pondered it again. This wasn’t an unfamiliar experience. It had been happening for years. The bite of the sharp night air bled through a crack in your draping covers and you shivered, conserving your heat by pulling further into yourself. Though familiar, this state you were in was anything but comfortable. Even if you really were comfortable like this, you wouldn’t have wanted to admit it.

The kitchen light was the only thing shining through the apartment. It wasn’t your apartment, no. This wave had to come crashing down on you when you were far from the safety of your home. This apartment was safe It belonged to your boyfriend and he made you feel safe, but he wasn’t there right now. It was just you and the sound of minuscule little droplets of rain pattering against the window. The street lights made the storm seem like a glitter against the glass, reflecting back the business of the night.

You couldn’t remember the last time you felt like this, but you had to remember it was ok not to be ok sometimes. “We naturally go through emotional highs and lows, everyone does,” she told you, “it doesn’t mean you’re broken if you feel bad- it means you're human.” ‘Remeber that,’ you'd thought, ‘remember it’s ok. You’re ok.’

Your drink smelled sweet and a little burnt. You breathed in the warmth wafting from it before slowly and cautiously tipping the cup to your lips. A hiss escaped your lips at the still scalding temperature colliding with your raw skin and you sighed. Your love of the cold weather had betrayed you and left you weak. The entire situation was stressful and tiring, and you’d cry if you could but for some horrible reason you just couldn’t.

Your mind struggled to focus on one thing at a time that had led to your current emotions but it mostly focused on the bad. Your mind was foggy and muddled and insisted on making a mental list of all the reasons your life was the absolute worst in this very moment. ‘Perhaps,’ you reasoned, ‘if I identify what's wrong, I can fix it.’

You were far from home. New York City was scary and big and loud and dirty and new to you. This was exciting and terrifying at the same time. You wanted to see everything, and Joe wanted to show it all to you, but of course, he still had work things and you were left alone. You only had so much time there and even less time with him. There was never any way you could have fit in every important place you wanted to see into the few precious hours you could share.

That led into your second reason, which was that you just desperately missed Joe. He hadn’t wanted to leave you alone, but duty does call and he had to answer. “I love you, ok? I’m so sorry, I- I wish I could have planned for this but-”

“You couldn’t have known! It’s ok,” You’d smiled at him and he kissed you before he left. Every morning and every night and every time he had the chance, he kissed you. God, it gave you life. His face just seemed to fit into your so perfectly, like your hands were molded against his cheeks. You closed your eyes and could almost feel him there with you, his warmth keeping you sane, but when you opened your eyes, he was gone.

Maybe the third reason was that your relationship was fairly new and you were insecure in the commitment for a number of reasons- or maybe it’s just that the holiday season was upon you and that ‘seasonal depression’ was hitting you hard. There was so much to do, so much to not miss out on, and so little time to relax and actually enjoy this time of year. Joe hadn’t managed to decorate for anything yet and had actually planned to do so with you, but it didn’t look like you’d have the chance to now. There were no lights up anywhere, no festive knick-knacks up on the shelves, nothing.

‘Or maybe,’ you thought, ‘it’s not seasonal, it’s just me.’ This was a turning point and you were scared. Joe had never seen you in such a deep, naturally dark headspace before, and you had little explanation for it. There was no one thing you could blame for the way you felt. It was just- Everything. A vague yet overwhelming anxiety rolled through you that made your guts feel like they’d turned to sawdust and were swirling around inside you like you were the floor of some horrible workshop.

The lighter side of your mind spoke up, ‘Maybe that’s not such a bad comparison, I mean, you are a workshop, always tinkering, changing, evolving. You are a human bent on self-improvement. Recovery,’ the voice reminded, ‘is not linear.’

“But any step forward is a good step,” you said out loud.

“What’s that from?”

“Holy fuckin’ sh-!” Your entire body jolted violently at the surprise of the response and your drink sloshed over the sides of your mug, spilling all over your blanket. Thankfully, it was no longer hot. “God, what a- what a waste of a good cup of-” Your curses trailed off into angry murmurs and you stood before looking over at Joe standing in the entryway looking equally as startled.

He’d just come back from a meeting with a potential director for an upcoming film to be met with his girlfriend completely spaced out on the couch. She’d been sitting there for several minutes without knowing he’d come in. When he spoke and surprised her, he jumped nearly as much as she did. He went over to help her clean up the spilled drink with a soft, sorry expression. She’d already gotten up, though, and shuffled to the kitchen without really acknowledging him. Something about the situation made Joe feel sick and guilty. “I’m so sorry. I, uh,” he paused and breathed a laugh as he picked up a pillow slipping off the couch and looked at the form that had moved into the kitchen, placing the empty cup on the counter with a soft click of ceramic against marble.

His breath hitched and he forgot whatever it was he’d intended to say to her. She was cast in odd shadows from the lights of the streetlamps inside combatting with the yellow glow of from above the stove. The scene carried none of the normally blissfull air his lover had. It was sharp and contrasting, like the set of an old expressionist film. He thought she would look fit beside the likes of Nosferatu, her in her cloak of covers and tussled hair barely emerging from the makeshift hood that supported her neck. The way she’d cocooned herself reminded him of a lost child standing alone in the cold, one no passing stranger would stop to notice.

It was silent for a moment as the actor continued absorbing her aura. The cars driving about in the rain echoed through the building. The sounds of splashing through puddles and revving engines drifted by his ears. [Y/N] stared at the sink before slowly meeting her boyfriend’s gaze. They just looked at each other. Joe felt like he wasn’t even there though like she didn’t see him there. She stared through him with the same disassociated look she had when he’d walked in. His shoes suddenly became of great interest to him and dragged his attention from her to the grain of the floor. “I’m,” he gulped and raised his eyebrows in a mixture of guilt and concern, “I’m so sorry I couldn’t be here with you today.” He looked at her again and she finally seemed to notice him standing there.

His sad puppy dog eyes bore you down. You’d fallen so hard for them. Before you’d even learned his name, you knew him by his eyes. You forced yourself to process what he’d said and were quickly overcome with guilt of your own. “Oh- Oh, no! Joe,” you pleaded and sighed as you rushed to him with a sympathetic smile, “I’m sorry, I just, like, spaced out- I’m fine, it’s all fine.” You nodded lightly at him with a stretched smile and looked up at him with hands gently placed on his chest, holding tightly to the coat he’d yet to remove.

“I know you have to work and I could never-” You bit your lip as your mental search for words was shown through the frantic lines your eyes traced, “I never want to be an obstacle.” With a softened gaze, pleading for ease in the oddly uncomfortable situation, you continued, “I’m pretty sure I’m always gonna love you, and I’ll be here,” his mouth parted as you paused, “just for you. No matter how many dates you miss, as long as you’re doing your best.” A pitiful chuckle fell from your lips.

So early in your relationship, you weren’t sure when an appropriate time to address your current emotional state would present itself. Then again, is any time a good time to discuss something like this? You felt he deserved an explanation, at the very least, to ease him a bit from the stiff form he kept since he’d returned that night. ‘Where to begin’, you wondered. Before you could let another sad syllable drip from your clenched teeth, jaw tight in distracted thought, arms wrapped around you and a bristly cheek pressed against your own.

“This is weird.” He whispered, “Why are we weird right now?” The blankets around were nuzzled out of the way so he could bury his face in the crook of your neck. His nose pressed hard against your hot skin. You were unprepared for the contact. All you could focus on was his heavy breathing beside your ear, every exhale slipping down your back and making you shiver. Cautious hands danced up the back of his neck, barely touching the airs that stood on end from the undefinable energy surging between the two of you. Molding yourself to fit perfectly in the empty cavities of space left, you were flush against him, clinging to the back of his head and letting his arms shift under yours to support you.

“I’m bad right now.” Your voice was almost a whimper, choking you on it’s way out. It wasn’t even your voice, the words were breaths you let out at all once. Joe- You weren’t sure he understood, and you didn’t expect him to immediately. He has no context yet, no reference besides what you’d carefully revealed to him. It was never your intention to hide any of your traits or symptoms or past from him, or most anyone, really, but it wasn’t exactly a hot topic of conversation.

He’d remembered briefly her using the phrase ‘when I was bad’ once or twice when referring to her mental and emotional state, but she didn’t often talk about it. Either it was sensitive or simply private, but it was fine. He didn’t push. The last thing he wanted was to make her uncomfortable or drive her away. While respecting her privacy and her past, he still swelled with concern at the thought of not knowing. It was a loving kind of fear that filled his stomach when he’d imagined moments like this; moments where something was wrong, something was off and he was in the dark. He didn’t need a reason to love and support her, but he was unsure of how to help in the best way.

“Bad emotionally,” she started in barely a whisper, though it was louder than before, “not ‘bad’ like-” There was a hot huff of air with a small laugh behind it and [Y/N] sniffled, “not ‘bad’ like- like ‘I’ve been bad, officer’- not in a sexual way-” It was punctuated with a cottony laugh.

Joe shook his head softly and gave the girl in his arms a squeeze. His smile was wide, though she couldn’t see it. Her squeak made him laugh a little and he could feel the air around them suddenly lose about five pounds. It was easier to lift his shoulders in this new situation.

After a moment of breathing in sync, cars passing by, and rain beating rhythmically against the windows, the man broke the silence. “You don’t have to say anything-”

“You know I can’t do that, Joe.” He held onto her for a moment longer then pulled only his head back slightly to kiss her turned cheek while she was still in his embrace. In the warm kitchen light, the patterns of the blanket and the shadows of the passing headlight combined like brushstrokes on the scene and turned them into the likeness of a Klimt painting. Yellow cascading down their backs and an iconic arching connection made this art.

“If you’re bad, then let's make it better.” The words were pressed into her skin by his plush lips. Before pulling away, their hands found one another’s and gripped them tightly, like he was a rope and she was dangling over the ever looming pit of her past.

For the first time, she could feel a wetness pricking at her eyes. Without effort or dismay, she could cry. There were no sobs to accompany it, just silent streaming tears. She didn’t stop them for they were a gift. The damp streaks beneath each eye bent around her growing grin as she looked up at her lover through the filter of emotional release. Everything but the earthy brown around his pupils was a watery mess in her eyes. ‘God,’ she thought, ‘This- He is a good one. He is so- He is so beautiful.’

Joe could feel the pain in his chest as his heart shook, threatening to crack at the image of his love in such a fragile form. “Let’s just-” He could have claimed the rest of the sentence got stuck in his throat but the truth is there was nothing there to get stuck, nothing to follow what he’d started saying. “Is it ok if we just,” he took a deep breath, “be together? Would that- Would that help?”

“You already help. Being here helps.” Her voice was back now, though, physically, she didn’t look in any way improved.

Joe handled his girlfriend gently and urged her to the couch with him, pulling down onto his lap so they both laid on the piece of furniture long ways. Her bundled body blanketed his and he leaned back, letting her warm him. Struggling to slip off his coat as he kicked off his shoes, Joe also snaked his arm into a pocket to retrieve his phone. He pulled it out with a small noise of pride and held it out in front of him. “A little George Harrison makes everything better, right?” There was a sleepy hum of agreement and ‘My Sweet Lord’ played softly from the speaker of his device. He nestled into [Y/N]’s and closed his eyes. He held the phone in his hands, clasped together as his arms wrapped around the woman.

The ‘hallelujahs’ seemed in time with the weather outside as the couple drifted further from the present and into their own billowing comfort. The lights still were yellow outside, as they were inside, and the cars didn’t stop speeding through the puddles. Though you doubted the return of these feelings would stop, for now, you were content. Joe was there with you and it somehow, just his presence, made some of the sadness wash away. He was like a rain on your pity parade, saving you from any continued celebration of your own inabilities. Tomorrow, there might be explanations needed, but tonight you felt blessed. He was safe. He was warm. Your mind wasn’t racing and your eyes weren’t dry. This was better than anything you’d been feeling, anything swelling inside you the past few days. This wasn’t an unfamiliar experience, and you’d hoped it would never become one.

Glancing up at the man beneath you one last time, you smiled genuinely, bliss settling in your center, and you closed your eyes. George Harrison lulled you to sleep that night, and safely asleep you fell, holding tightly to Joe through it all, just as tightly as he held you.

211 notes · View notes

hcrcwitz · 5 years

Text

last but not least! please HMU or LIKE THIS to plot again, i luv u all for stickin w me in this trying time.

❝ constance wu. cisfemale. she/her. ❞ ━ 𝕝𝕒𝕜𝕖𝕧𝕚𝕖𝕨 welcomes heather zhao with open arms. the thirty-five year old botanist has been living here for fifteen years, give or take. on a good day, they seem the vehement & eccentric type, but their deceitful & capricious tendencies shine through when there are no taxis into the city.

heather was also a freak as a child. why??? bc i find freaky children to be very relatable ok. im incapable of writing a character w a normal childhood.

born in raised in toronto, her was was a dentist & her mom stayed home to watch her & her 2 siblings!!! she’s the middle child and u can TELL

she was a science kid!!! like....u know the kind w all those little science kids to like grow ur own crystals and blow shit up and whatever. thought lighting stuff on fire was cool.

she was fairly popular in school!!! although most definitely a trouble maker. top of her class, student council president, yearbook editor, track star, valedictorian, her plate was FULL. and yet.....the little shit was always in detention

everything was just so BORING, which is why she chose to keep herself busy and do so many things. there was never one place she fit in, always bouncing around trying new things and befriending new ppl.

she graduated early and ended up getting hella scholarship money & she went off to uni to study dentistry just like her dad

her uni roommate was..........a horrible influence on her. well, they were bad influences on each other tbqh because heather wasn’t exactly a good egg to begin with LMAO.

they definitely focused more on their social lives than their grades, but heather still did p well in school.

heather decided pretty quickly that she did NOT want to be a dentist and eventually, after her and her roommate decided it would be a great idea to grow pot plants in their dorm closet, switched her major to botany instead and the bitch was a whiz! casually growing & selling closet pot to fund their horrible spending habits

she got engaged to her college bf on a whim & she moved to lakeview w him & they got married as soon as she finished her degree. needless to say it definitely did NOT last. she stayed married to him while she finished her masters and then the two called it quits, but she stayed in town.

a few years later she ended up pregnant w her first child shortly after she finished her doctorate!!! she’d only been dating her boyfriend for a few months at the time but of course......being the impulsive gal she is, they got married!!!! they ended up having another child before they inevitably split up. they currently share custody and they’re on v good terms!!!! there rly are no hard feelings, things just didnt work out for them romantically but they’re still v good friends!!

she got engaged again at some point but never quite made it to her third marriage, which is fine by her. she’ll probably be married another 3 times before she dies but who cares!!!!! weddings are fun. when will she learn her lesson???????? we may never know

anyway, now she out here doing plant things and being a Cool mom. she mostly does a lot of environmental research w her job but also......she runs a grow op on the low, pls don’t tell the police. she’s making bank for the future of her CHILDREN.

she rly is a whackadoodle y’all

she is Loud. generally a cheerful person but she can flip flop so quick it’s SCARY. blames her lack of sleep but she’s always been like this.

indecisive as hell, moody, generally just........a little bit psycho.

kind of has her head in the clouds????

kind of wants to fight everyone she meets.

she rly still is that little trouble maker she used to be and has only smartened up a LITTLE bit since becoming a mom LMAO.

likes to to reckless things to feel alive. still thinks everything is boring, which is probably why she’s being risky af with her fuckin grow op???

she’s like nancy botwin but actually a Good mom LOL.

a bit of a creative type! never really had the chance to explore that side of her growing up but she’s fully exploring it now that she has kids. makes their halloween costumes and now she’s 10000% a pinterest mom.

she’s Out there. marches to the beat of her own drum, doesnt care what the other bitch pta moms think. she’ll FIGHT THEM!!!! karen better watch her damn back sis

some extra lil bits bc i Gotta

her two kids are ava (8) and miles (6) and she loves them more than absolutely anything in the entire world ofc!!! they are her angels............if u let her she will show u a million photos of them and brag abt them forever.

wine mom??? we don’t know her. heather is a VODKA mom 10000%.

her ex has the kids on weekends so........that is her time to SHINE sis!!! she rly loves to go out and dance and she slays karaoke.

she rly likes cooking and she thinks she’s AMAZING but.....anyone else will tell u that she is horrible.

but she’s rly into healthy eating & her and her kids have a garden and they grow their own veggies & shit its a wholesome family activity

honestly she rly is a kid at heart!!!!

always stressed out but still crackin jokes

she’s smart but still bad at most things??? bad at cooking, bad at driving, bad at time management, but good at helping her kids out on their school projects and REALLY good at planning the best sleepovers

honestly the best way to sum her up is just..........she’s nice but she wants to fight u

#thirtyintro #finally #i can REST

10 notes · View notes

batsysims · 5 years

Photo

didnt wanna do an actual Simself Edit™ so have an arrested development reference

anyways

i was tagged by @0cherub & i tag any1 who hasnt done this yet bc who doesnt like answering 125 questions abt themselves oh also @flavortowne im forcing you to do this sry

get to know me tag

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? its batsy dont worry abt it

2. WHAT IS YOUR NICKNAME? its batsy dont worry abt it

3. BIRTHDAY? september 15

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BOOK SERIES? what?? are books

5. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ALIENS OR GHOSTS? ye both

6. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE AUTHOR? ummmm idk lmfao i havent “read” a “book”” in like 5 years

7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE RADIO STATION? 35 & 36 on sirius are like basically the exact same station but that doesnt mean i dont constantly alternate between the two whenever im near a radio

8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLAVOR OF ANYTHING? pink is a v trustworthy flavor

9. WHAT WORD WOULD YOU USE OFTEN TO DESCRIBE SOMETHING GREAT OR WONDERFUL? *owen wilson voice* wrow

10. WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT FAVORITE SONG? what kinda question is this wt f ive currently reobsessed myself w marina and the diamonds so honestly any of her discography

11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE WORD? idk any words :^/ sry

12. WHAT WAS THE LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO? wheels on the bus im exhausted

13. WHAT TV SHOW WOULD YOU RECOMMEND FOR EVERYBODY TO WATCH? man in the high castle. man in the high castle. man in the high ca

14. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE TO WATCH WHEN YOU’RE FEELING DOWN? clerks al;dksfjf

15. DO YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES? almost exclusively sims and fallout but every once in a while some indie game i find on steam so. yea

16. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? never doing anything in my life and having nothing 2 look forward to!! yay

17. WHAT IS YOUR BEST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? probably my resiliency, maybe?? idk

18. WHAT IS YOUR WORST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? my habit of allowing bad things to happen to me lol

19. DO YOU LIKE CATS OR DOGS BETTER? cats but im sorta kinda indifferent 2 both i think i might 1 of the 5 ppl on earth who dont like having pets

20. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? summer and fall

21. ARE YOU IN A RELATIONSHIP? yea

22. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU MISS FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD? not being lazy lmfao

23. WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND? @flavortowne eye emoji

24. WHAT IS YOUR EYE COLOR? blue

25. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR? its natural brown but im thinkn abt going either red or blonde again

26. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU LOVE? like 3 ppl irl and everyone on discord u guys legit

27. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU TRUST? my person and @flavortowne eye emoji

28. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? tom hardy. what is his end goal

29. ARE YOU CURRENTLY EXCITED ABOUT/FOR SOMETHING? tbh going 2 basic lmfao im!! lame

30. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST OBSESSION? as of right now,, spiderverse lol

31. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW AS A CHILD? teletubbies was fckn legit and so was old school spongebob

32. WHO OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER CAN YOU TELL ANYTHING TO, IF ANYONE? my person

33. ARE YOU SUPERSTITIOUS? im not superstitious,,, but i am a little stitious

34. DO YOU HAVE ANY UNUSUAL PHOBIAS? i cant deal w fishing poles idk

35. DO YOU PREFER TO BE IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA OR BEHIND IT? in front babey

36. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOBBY? sims or stitching play foods 4 the kid to use on her play kitchen

37. WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? stop asking book questions

38. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? spiderverse yeye

39. WHAT MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? piano & i try 2 pretend i know what im doing w a ukulele

40. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL? stingrays :^)

41. WHAT ARE YOUR TOP 5 FAVORITE TUMBLR BLOGS THAT YOU FOLLOW? legit all my mutuals

42. WHAT SUPERPOWER DO YOU WISH YOU HAD? i had an oc that could read ppls memories like a scrapbook if he touched them and i always honestly thought that was. cool

43. WHEN AND WHERE DO YOU FEEL MOST AT PEACE? in my house!! the door b locked bitch!!!!

44. WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE? toddler being an idiot toddler

45. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? its not really,, a sport,, but i bike

46. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DRINK? cream soda in those glass bottles is top tier non-alcoholic beverage

47. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A HAND-WRITTEN LETTER OR NOTE TO SOMEBODY? i wrote a letter 2 my person telling him he was an idiot and by the time it was mailed 2 his house i was already living there lol

48. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS? nah

49. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? either ppl blowing vape in my face or holding something so close to my face i cant see i just go ballistic

50. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A CONCERT? nope unless u count a sesame street liveshow like 10 years ago

51. ARE YOU VEGAN/VEGETARIAN? nope!

52. WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE, WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP? a cop lmfao

53. WHAT FICTIONAL WORLD WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE IN? this is horrible but the setting of new vegas i just feel like id be at home there, w the radiation and constant danger and dehydration

54. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WORRY ABOUT? the kid

55. ARE YOU SCARED OF THE DARK? only when im looking in the mirror adlkfj start thinkn abt a different face showing up instead of mine idk

56. DO YOU LIKE TO SING? yea

57. HAVE YOU EVER SKIPPED SCHOOL? skipped a whole year adlfkj

58. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE ON THE PLANET? this is basic but i miss the tri-state area

59. WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE? this is basic but i miss nj

60. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? yea :^/ a dog, a cat, and uhhhh 14 fish

61. ARE YOU MORE OF AN EARLY BIRD OR A NIGHT OWL? night owl but honestly im just always tired

62. DO YOU LIKE SUNRISES OR SUNSETS BETTER? sunsettttt

63. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DRIVE? i do

64. DO YOU PREFER EARBUDS OR HEADPHONES? headphones. they just work

65. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? nah but i need em

66. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC? i listen to everything tbh

67. WHO IS YOUR HERO? michael cera

68. DO YOU READ COMIC BOOKS? i used to read them religiously but not so much any more. i am reading the TAZ graphic novel tho

69. WHAT MAKES YOU THE MOST ANGRY? having to repeat myself 20 times. or being an idiot when i wanna start a new hobby

70. DO YOU PREFER TO READ ON AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE OR WITH A REAL BOOK? idk how to read

71. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? honestly i had a blast in econ and my law enforcement class

72. DO YOU HAVE ANY SIBLINGS? a bro, another sibling, and a half-bro

73. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? food lmfao

74. HOW TALL ARE YOU? every time i measure myself im 5′2″ but the government insists that i am 5′3″ so w/e

75. CAN YOU COOK? yeap

76. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU LOVE? alcohol, bike riding, wearing stupid makeup

77. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU HATE? ppl holding me back, bird box, when my nail breaks before i can file it so its all oglee

78. DO YOU HAVE MORE FEMALE FRIENDS OR MORE MALE FRIENDS? uh idk?? i dont have,, many,,,, friends

79. WHAT IS YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION? bi

80. WHERE DO YOU CURRENTLY LIVE? sc :’^(

81. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TEXTED? my brother

82. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? 2 nights ago the kid pistol whipped me in the chin w her phone and it just hurt so bad it legit made me lose it

83. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE YOUTUBER? ok this is dumb as shit the kid is obsessed w Blippi and i have a mom crush on him afdslfkjs

84. DO YOU LIKE TO TAKE SELFIES? ye

85. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE APP? i am currently obsessed w L.O.L. Surprise! Pop but all in all probs Pocket Camp

86. WHAT IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENT(S) LIKE? bad as parents but theyre fine now that im an adult and they have a grandkid they can like

87. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOREIGN ACCENT? i dont like a majority of them lmfao but idk maybe uh?? irish

88. WHAT IS A PLACE THAT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO, BUT YOU WANT TO VISIT? rly wanna go to nevada but im moving to the mojave soon anyways so

89. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER? 15

90. CAN YOU JUGGLE? nope

91. ARE YOU RELIGIOUS? i was raised christian but i dont rly give a shit abt any of that

92. DO YOU FIND OUTER SPACE OR THE DEEP OCEAN TO BE MORE INTERESTING? outer space my dood the ocean is dumb and scary

93. DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE A DAREDEVIL? im jus livin my life

94. ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO ANYTHING? i mean. im lactose intolerant but thats abt it

95. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE? nope

96. CAN YOU WIGGLE YOUR EARS? no

97. HOW OFTEN DO YOU ADMIT THAT YOU WERE WRONG ABOUT SOMETHING? when im wrong abt something

98. DO YOU PREFER THE FOREST OR THE BEACH? forest ig bad choices

99. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIECE OF ADVICE THAT ANYONE HAS EVER GIVEN YOU? i dont think i was ever given advice, ever. maybe thats why im like this

100. ARE YOU A GOOD LIAR? idk i try not 2 lie unless its like. an obvious exaggeration for the lols

101. WHAT IS YOUR HOGWARTS HOUSE? wtf idk ok i just did one of those quizzes & im a slytherin?? what does that mean

102. DO YOU TALK TO YOURSELF? yeah

103. ARE YOU AN INTROVERT OR AN EXTROVERT? more of an introvert but im ok w going out there if i gotta

104. DO YOU KEEP A JOURNAL/DIARY? i keep one for the kid but thats abt it

105. DO YOU BELIEVE IN SECOND CHANCES? nah. unless it was something stupid like burning food like im not gonna ban u from the kitchen

106. IF YOU FOUND A WALLET FULL OF MONEY ON THE GROUND, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? if theres an id i guess mail it 2 the address on there?? idk ive never just. found a wallet. i think this happens a lot less than all the hypotheticals make it out to be

107. DO YOU BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE ARE CAPABLE OF CHANGE? if theyre dedicated to it. i dont think ppl can just do it over night and i dont think its ever a 100% change

108. ARE YOU TICKLISH? dont touch me

109. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A PLANE? Yep

110. DO YOU HAVE ANY PIERCINGS? 2 in both ears but thats it

111. WHAT FICTIONAL CHARACTER DO YOU WISH WAS REAL? spidr...mna

112. DO YOU HAVE ANY TATTOOS? no :^( once im cleared for them tho deffo

113. WHAT IS THE BEST DECISION THAT YOU’VE MADE IN YOUR LIFE SO FAR? i hate that this is the answer but enlisting adlfkjs

114. DO YOU BELIEVE IN KARMA? yeah ig??

115. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES OR CONTACTS? glasses

116. DO YOU WANT CHILDREN? 2 late

117. WHO IS THE SMARTEST PERSON YOU KNOW? we all b stupit

118. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING MEMORY? idk?? i get embarrassed but also get over it quick so like. idk

119. HAVE YOU EVER PULLED AN ALL-NIGHTER? yea

120. WHAT COLOR ARE MOST OF YOU CLOTHES? black & red

121. DO YOU LIKE ADVENTURES? mhm

122. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON TV? i was on nickelodeon back when they had those cuts to the Live Studio Audience™

123. HOW OLD ARE YOU? 21

124. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE? “I wish there was a way to know you’re in the good old days before you’ve actually left them.”

125. DO YOU PREFER SWEET OR SAVORY FOODS? savory i almost never eat anything sweet

#get to know me tag #now that ive posed this i wanna get back in2 making pose packs sigh

6 notes · View notes