I LOVE BEING ARO SO MUCH!!!!!! I WILL NEVER FEEL ROMANTIC ATTRACTION AND THATS BEAUTIFUL AND NATURAL AND SOMETHING I WILL WIELD AS A WEAPON AND A SHIELD AGAINST ANYONE WHO WOULD CHANGE ME OR ERASE ME!!!!!! REALIZING I AM ARO WAS ONE OF THE MOST JOYFUL AND FREEING AND ILLUMINATING EXPERIENCES OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY EXUBERANCE AT LIVING WITHOUT THE NARROW SOCIETAL IDEA OF "LOVE" KNOWS NO BOUNDS AND I SEE BEAUTY IN EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!! MY LIFE OVERFLOWS WITH JOYFUL ABUNDANCE!!!!!!!! I AM BURSTING FOR AFFECTION WITH EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WILL NEVER BE "ALONE" (I WILL NEVER BE LONELY) BECAUSE I WILL MAKE FOR MYSELF A LIFE THAT SINGS AND SHINES!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE LIVING A LOVELESS LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE THE SELF RELIANCE OF MY HAPPINESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM INFINITE AND BOUNDLESS AND DEFY DESCRIPTION OR CATEGORIZATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM AROMANTIC!!!!!!!! ALL IS JOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALL IS LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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never ceases to amaze me how ppl are obsessed with assigning other characters's traits and story arcs to Izzy to pretend that He's The Only One Who-- (no, he isn't)
'cause yk there IS a character who has a casual disability/body difference that doesn't just exist when it's relevant to the plot (and is, in fact, not relevant to the plot at all, because it's not a narrative device). A character who starts out with hypermasculine posturing and tbh kinda femmephobic, and is then quite literally cured by gay love. Who's kinda weird and goofy, but depicted as hot and desirable, because that's what he is! Who goes through a traumatic event and finds catharsis and healing, and sure, lots of that happens off-screen and could be addressed in more detail, but when has that ever stopped fandom from writing novel-length metas and fanfics. Who has a beautiful, canon love story.
And on top of that he's a hilarious, sarcastic little shit, and just great fun to watch!
(It's Pete. I'm talking about my buddy, my best friend, my specialest boy Black Pete.)
But for some reason he tends to fall to the wayside in fandom. If he's talked about at all, there's a fandom-wide tendency to make him into the shitty, one-dimensional, disney-esque clown and comic relief character he notably is not in canon - and assign his actual arc and characteristics to a more palatable angry asshole.
Hmm.
Wonder why that is.
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the darkest of nights, in truth, still dazzles.
a halsin fanmix [listen]
01. Heart of Spring - david arkenstone | 02. Cé Hé Mise Le Ulaingt? / The Two Trees - loreena mckennit | 03. Pussywillows, Cat-tails - gordon lightfoot | 04. Maybe Tomorrow - f&m | 05. Don't Stop Me Now - queen | 06. I Was Born Under a Wand'rin' Star - bryn terfel | 07. A Tenuous Bond - derek duke | 08. Closer - nine inch nails | 09. Into the Darkness - jeremy soule | 10. Colorblind - counting crows | 11. Natural Light - ludovico einaudi | 12. Under the Greenwood Tree - royal shakespeare company | 13. The Grove - bear mccreary | 14. Blood Upon the Snow - hozier & bear mccreary | 15. A Quiet Darkness - houses | 16. Spellplague - alderfall | 17. Empty Chairs at Empty Tables - jonathan antoine | 18. Only Everyone Can Judge Me - crywank | 19. Blue Skies - kathryn calder | 20. The Buzzard - old blind dogs | 21. Constant Craving - k.d. lang | 22. The Cave - mumford and sons | 23. Jim Cain - bill callahan | 24. I Won't Back Down - johnny cash | 25. The Ash Grove - laura wright | 26. The Wind - yusuf/cat stevens | 27. To Someone From A Warm Climate (Uiscefhuarithe) - hozier | 28. The Logical Song - supertramp | 29. Tapestry - don mclean | 30. Big Yellow Taxi - joni mitchell | 31. Eat Your Young (Bekon's Choral Version) - hozier | 32. The Flock - david maxxim micic | 33. Changes - david bowie | 34. Ri Na Cruinne - clanaad | 35. The Moments of Happiness - ken page | 36. My Back Pages - the byrds | 37. If This Journey - tom hanford | 38. Turn! Turn! Turn! (To Everything There is a Season) - Live - pete seeger
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i made a semi-facetious joke about kabru dungeon meshi but then it turned into a long ramble oops
kabru is so weirded out by laios' inscrutable vibes and lack of interest in other people (including kabru which he totally doesn't take personally or anything) that he immediately descends into paranoia and assumes malevolence
what i'm saying is laios is autistic rep, this we know,
but kabru is also autistic rep,
for equally traumatized autistic people who think their hard-learned mastery of people pleasing, social scripts and masking translates into unilateral skill at reading people of all types and assuming they are right on the money about it every time (**despite obvious cases of this not being true) and now call themselves Dark Empaths and have that one person who didn't wrong them but also didn't notice them or immediately become their friend and so said Empath is waiting desperately for another, actually valid reason to call them out and claim this weirdo was evil all along and be 'dealt with' and feel reassuring closure over not being able to connect with what is now clearly proven to be just an obvious error of a human, whatever that even means,
and tragically not grappling with the irony of this being the exact fate they've merely defensively trained their way out of facing at the hands of others
i say this as someone who likes kabru and think he and laios should kiss btw i just wanted to see how many people read all that and Flinched, happy tuesday
**something something:
Worthy Contrast i think, between
A) kabru assuming average joe adventurers laios and falin are sinister people hiding something... after seeing their honest generosity be pretty blatantly taken advantage of, without them ever catching on or at least never causing a fuss, and kabru assuming laios could only ever be corrupted by the forces of the dungeon because laios doesn't care enough about people or what people think, which must mean he doesn't value human life enough to not do evil things one day
B) kabru having misguided trust for the town's literal crime lord, who he knows is a crime lord, entirely bc of how friendly the guy is and how clean and orderly he runs things (because it's functionally pragmatic to not be as evil as possible about it) and oohh they're so well acquainted! kabru knows he's a ultimately a good dude who'd do the right thing and care about the community whose seedy underbelly he oversees, and look at him, he even looks like santa claus...! after all the cordial interactions they've had, surely "leave money on the table to prevent a calamity that could leave hundreds dead" is a favor he won't mind kabru asking of him at all!
kabru said he wanted to see a mask fall,
he got exactly that
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thinking abt what you said with house viewing Benny as a son and I’m obsessed. Like. The man spent most of his life before the war presumably alone, and then after the bombs fell he was alone again, save for AI he himself devised. Then he decides to pull in some Tribes, and one kid shows promise! So sure, treat him well, train him, groom him to be his protege, then next thing you know UH OH he’s got developing paternal feelings towards this guy. Wanting some semblance of a family when the time has long since passed, yet fostering that feeling all the same seems so accurate for him. Benny meanwhile only views him as a boss, and not a particularly good one at that. makes me wonder how House must’ve felt when he found out about Bennys plans
I view it as House blames only himself for this, cause he kind of does in canon (strap in this is a long one).
When reflecting on the issue of Benny, House chastises himself first and foremost for not acting quickly enough when it comes to priming Benny. He describes Benny as being ambitious, ruthless and capable; compliments coming from a man like House. House has an ego and while he is logical enough to understand there was never any evidence Benny saw him as a father-figure, he lacks the humility to admit he let his own views on his relationship with Benny blind him to the activities happening behind the scenes.
I doubt that House was as aware as he makes out about what Benny was doing, he knew early on but certainly not early enough to stop Benny from hacking and obtaining a securitron along with getting the chip in the first place. I take it he was distracted by all the possibilities he was calculating of Vegas' success and growth with him steering and Benny as the new figure head, not because of any normal affection for Benny but the admiration of his capabilities. It's to be noted that House believed menial incentives (likely caps, booze, basic needs, etc..) were enough to keep Benny tame like the other Chairmen but, as evidenced by the Omertas and Mortimer in the WGS, this is not enough when it comes to more driven Vegas citizens. This implies he still undervalued Benny and created a space in which Benny felt the need to rebel.
House in my eyes is not sentimental in the traditional sense. I can imagine his pride was severely scorned as someone he certainly deemed dumber than him was, albeit only for a little, able to out-gambit him. It would definitely hit home seeing how his brother also betrayed him but I feel like that's why he's so apathetic when he tells the Courier to do as they see fit with Benny. I doubt the way he terrorized his brother brought him any emotional satisfaction other than a "Now who's in charge!" ego boost. Putting that same emotional intensity towards Benny isn't worth it because who does it benefit? Wasted time, wasted planning, and most importantly wasted potential are all he gets from continuing to be hands-on with Benny. I say the closest example is not being able to throw out old toys due to the memories attached but knowing it's necessary as they are broken or just taking up space for new ones, and then asking someone else to do it so you don't need to get caught up in the feelings of throwing something you put so much effort into. It's not Benny House cares about in my mind, not in a way that sounds healthy to any non-emotionally constipated individual, but what he could've represented for him, which is why he so quickly offers the same position to the Courier.
As for Benny's view on all of this, it was a long time coming. Benny didn't and doesn't believe House is a completely shitty boss. He admires what he's been shown and admits House knows how to run the strip, but disagrees with the directions. Ideologically, House is an anarcho-capitalist while Benny is just an anarchist. House wants to run the strip to profit, though money is not what he's concerned with being rich with anymore. Benny wants a free state that he wishes to become a place for the people, except for the Chairmen who would be on top (I like to remind people that Benny's motives were selfish but not for personal gain/power as was it for the people he actually saw as family). Benny was never looking for a father but a future. He was not interested in being adopted, or having the chairmen adopted, as bigger names still overshadowed in House's legacy.
Truly, it's easiest to summarize as House feeling strongly and thinking positively enough of Benny to start incorporating him into the future of Vegas (a huge honor actually) while Benny was so disillusioned by House's ego and indifference that he thought the only way Vegas could be the future is with House gone.
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Sometimes, I wonder what would have become of certain characters - guys like Gore and McDonald, for example - if they hadn't been killed extra-prematurely.
Would their continued presence have made any difference, and if so, how? What would it have taken for them to be pushed truly to the brink, to their absolute limit?
In essence, and for lack of a better phrase, they died as "heroes" but would they ever have become "villains" had they only lived longer?
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