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siriusly-the-best-bi · 9 months

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wow so I have like 3 analysis in progress that touch on this topic but I really need to just talk about it rn with its own spotlight.

Aziraphale has this entire life that he's built for himself on earth, after armageddon he's thriving. When we catch up with him in Season 2 his first scene is literally him going to check in with one of his tenants, and throughout the season we see that he has a decent relationship with nearly Everyone on the block. He has an entire life for himself all hashed out and pretty.

Crowley... does not. His cold open in Season 2 is back in St. James park, checking in with Shax, finding out the gossip on Hell. He doesn't have his apartment, he only has his Bentley and the few plants he could fit in it. He doesn't have any other human friendships. His entire life and everything he loves to do is built entirely around Aziraphale.

This is something that I just find so fucking thrilling because when it comes to their characters and where exactly they are in their arcs right now, it's essentially like looking into a mirror.

Aziraphale knows exactly who he is when he's on his own. He nurtures his own relationships with humans he sees often, he's a nice landlord, he loves books and classical music, and hot cocoa. But, Aziraphale still holds onto the ideals of heaven. He still cares about doing good and being forgiving. He still cowers and jumps at the opportunity to help heaven, not because he wants to but because he's supposed to because he's still an angel.

Crowley has nothing. He has his car, which he drives to a secluded location to park every night, only to drive it right back in the morning. He's only even vaguely recognizable because people associate him with Aziraphale and this is fine for him, he could care less. He doesn't really need to know who he is or process his traumas, why would he when he can put all his attention and focus and love and care directly into Aziraphale? His friend, who has always been his friend, the one person who has always stood by him. Who cares about heaven and hell, he has Aziraphale.

When we finally see them on their own and without the influences of their head offices, we see the opposite of what we'd expect, and nearly the opposite of the outcome we see in episode 6. Crowley is the one constantly checking in with Hell (wether he likes it or not), and Aziraphale is the one who's living care free without even thinking about heaven. When he does something good that he wants to report, he just calls Crowley.

this whole dance of Crowley not knowing who he is without Aziraphale and Aziraphale knowing who he is fundamentally but not knowing how to break free from the confines of Heaven that stop him from truly embracing Crowley in the end, it's just so delicious.

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odakota-rose · 2 months

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so many gems in the Doctor Who script library the BBC just released but today I'm here in 4x02, The Fires of Pompeii

#doctor who #donna noble #tenth doctor #the fires of pompeii #literally this is donna's second trip #the first time she met the doctor she saw what he was capable of #and this episode does that too but in a different way #somebody far more eloquent than i needs to elaborate on how this was on a small scale reminiscent #of what the doctor had to do to end the time war #(or at least at this point thought he did. not getting into the timey-wimey retcons rn)#and how he always seems to end up having to make these soulcrushing choices on his own bc that's what being the doctor means #but donna does something very different here and chooses to take half the weight of this impossible choice #and i am very 😭 about it #don't mind me just spiraling over a sixteen year old episode of doctor who on this fine thursday afternoon #as one does #wait.... it's tuesday. dammit.#my posts

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beatcroc · 1 year

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there's no way the bathroom at peppino's pizza is actually that big but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . hey ummm anyway.... i care them...... anyway there's a lil ramble on my take on fake pep's like psyche or whatever in tags on the og post if ur into that kinda thing :y

hey! it's a series! fake peppino world tour: [noise] [noisette] [peppino]<- u are here [gustavo] [gerome] [noisette again]

#ramble after realtags yeag. shoutout to serrangelic btw suggesting the silhouettes thing bc i would have Died otherwise #pizza tower #peppino spaghetti #fake peppino #gustavo and brick #arting #pizzaposting #so anyway i think fake peppino has like. a general awareness that he is supposed to Be Peppino and that he was Made to do that #and likewise he does generally try to...do that. the thing he does NOT realize is hes like really goddamn bad at it #not to be mean but like...c'mon. they are pretty distinctly different kinds of guys even beyond the physiology yknow.#he's neither on-brand nor fooling anyone dsjdsjjkgfsd. BUT!#since the rest of the cast generally likes him [at least as I play it] he thinks hes doing just fine #he's like 'oh they r happy with me so i must be getting a good grade in being peppino :)'#so getting told that 'yeah you actually really suck at that but that was never the reason people liked you'#and told that by og model peppino no less--yknow THE guy he's supposed to be living up to #who's already a bit intimidating for that and who ALSO totally wrecked him TWICE in the tower #making him acutely familiar with just how formidable the guy is and how much there IS to live up to....#it's a Moment for sure. not really a sad or hurt one though. just... contemplative.#thinking abt people liking him for being the guy he's already naturally been being even though that guy is Not Peppino #i don't think he's gonna be super broken up about realizing he has a bad grade in peppino given everything else hes got now #nor do i really think he cares enough to go like reinvent himself or whatever after the fact #he seems to b pretty clearly having fun with it already so i think he just keeps doing that #and in some cases he still has the pre-installed peppino traits/instincts like to cooka da pizza. and that's fine #is this projection. yes. but if youve been following me awhile you know most of my character writing is ghdhfdgf #gonna kinda expand on all this in the gerome one which is...one after next. itll be a bit but man.#anyway peppino will never admit to anyone and especially not himself that he's gotten a little attached to the guy. hee hoo #pep tends to be kinda surly but he certainly has his ways of showing he cares. all of which are on display here #''that thing is not my son'' says man currently watching thing's antics with the 'bemused dad' arms crossed pose. yeah ok buddy.#gus is totally onto him already but hes not gonna say anything.#if u read all this ur prize is not having to go decode fp's rot13. his lines are ''meant to be you...?'' and ''wrong question.''

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thesupernaturalhouse · 1 month

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Vaggie: Alastor can you watch the eggs their being....eggs and I have to- just take them off my hands

Alastor: ooo i certainly will....

Vaggie:.....in a peaceful manner. Alastor.

Alastor: mmm well that's less fun, also why should I watch them?

Vaggie: well you're going to some meeting and I have to help charlie-

Alastor: didn't she excuse you from your duties for today?

Vaggie:...why would she- why would I ask for that??

Alastor: why, you have to come to this meeting to my dear!

Vaggie: no I dont?? It's an overlord meeting I'm not an overlord-

Alastor: but you are!

Vaggie: if anything charlie should probably be going with you rather then me- what what??

Alastor: I'll explain on the way! *just fucking leaves*

Vaggie: wha- alastor! Alastor I swear to the lord you better explain!

Alastor: hmmm, well you're an overlord my dear I don't think there's anything else TO explain

Vaggie: right...but I'm NOT an overlord??

Alastor: I beg to differ, I knew there was something off about you but couldn't place it until Charlie said something

Vaggie: Charlie- what does- okay you know what? You're insane. I'm going to go talk to Charlie myself!

Alastor grabs her shirt collar like a kitten: ah-ah-ah you have a meeting to attend my dear! It's be bad manners if you skipped it, whoch I suppose you've been skipping them for the past 5 or so years?

Vaggie: No, I haven't! and let go of my you asshole!

Alastor: hmmm no I don't think I will~ come on now! We're already half way there!

Vaggie: ugh, at least tell me how you and xharlie think I'm an overlord- which I'm NOT by the way!

Alastor: well...do you remember that sinner you saved? The one you had a slat with and ended uo teaching self defense?

Vaggie: how do you-....ah, charlie- what does that have to do with anything??

Alastor radio noise of displeasure: well, APPARENTLY they told more demons, you DO remember the large influx of demons who came to you right?

Vaggie: I.....I um....yeah....

Alastor: well they said they owed you 'favors' correct?

Vaggie:....fuck.

Alastor: they gave you their souls until said favor is called upon! You not using it has apparently given you the reputation of a very lenient overlord, a defensive and protective one at that! So more people cane to you, you trianed them in defense and most gave you their souls so you could call upon them for a favor at a time of your choosing!

Vaggie: going through the 5 stages of grief trying to process it all

Alastor: On top of that, the other overlords seem to be threatened by the fact you have so many souls and demons going to you WILLINGLY, you not showing up to meetings and beong little morningstars girlfriend doesnt help that either!So this will be a fun first meeting~

Vaggie: no no no no no nope! Alastor, you let me go right this second! I am not- no! Alastor! Alastor!!!

Zestial: Alastor and...oh the defensive Overlord nice to meet you again nd to finally meet you

Vaggie: ¿¡Quién diablos es esta araña joder!? (Who the hell is this spider fuck!?)

Part 1 | Part 2(here!!) | Part 3

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel au #hazbin hotel vaggie #hazbin hotel charlie #hazbin hotel alastor #chaggie #accidental overlord vaggie au #i feel like Al would be pissed at vaggie knowing charlie told him #he lieks to seem mroe powerful/high and mighty and he cant bw that if she knows he gets info form other people #hes very smug at Vaggies panic though #charlie meanwhile already misses her girlfriend #Nifty throwing herself off the roof doesnt help #hazbin hotel overlord #the egg boizs are having a grand old time though #i used google translate for the Spanish part im sorry if its wrong-#i wanted vaggie to say “who the hell is this spider fuck!?” but everytime i tried it always ended up as something different #i tried for like 1p minutes #i THINK i got it down but im not sure if the '!?' changes any words/symbols #translator says it does but im not 100% how right it is so- if its not that then its 'who the hell is this fucking spider' which still work #not to important i guess lol #diablos actually mgiht mean devil and inferno hell but uh....its- its fine #any spanish speakers feel free to correct me😅

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ryssbelle · 3 months

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Some of y’all portray John Dory as so old and yeah he is older and you can do whatever you want forever as an artist or writer but he is 30 years old and yall draw him like his pushing 50

Mans got one foot in the grave and the others going in the second he his 36

Bonus:

#my art #dreamworks trolls #trolls 3 #trolls #trolls john dory #trolls band together #also i would like to say im not upset or anything by this #age is like weird when it comes to how its displayed on peoples faces #like bramch is 24 and has crows feet #its also neat how everyone seems to have aged fine and by that i mean looking their age #except for branch and for some john dory #and those two are the ones who spent a lot of time isolated and (most likely for john) depressed #and like yeah loneliness and sadness does age you #physically mentally emotionally #so it is like natural that john would look and feel older than he is BUT #not by decades dude #cuz like yeah branch has crows feet but he also still looks somewhat his age #you can tell the wrinkles in his face are from frowning not from age #tho like i do love peoples personal designs and takes #theyre all very unique #i just thought this was funny #and also it kind of needs to be said #cuz people act like once you turn 30 its all over but dude thats when your life is really beginning in that #you usually finally know who you are you know #like one of my friends hes 29 and like hes living the dream dude just doing what he loves and its so nice #and im not saying he has it all figured out but he has enough that hes setting a pretty damn good example #and hes only just begun you know he still has so far to go in life #we joke that hes old but again its all jokes #i just dont like that people think your life ends at 30 cuz you still have about 50 years left #but yeah anyway moral of the story 30 isnt old and you still got a lot more life to lead before you crumble to dust have fun live well

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sysig · 4 months

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It’ll all go fine if you’d just don’t worry about it, probably (Patreon)

#Doodles #Handplates #UT #Fellplates #Gaster #Toriel #And technically Sans and Papyrus are offscreen in that last one but they're there!#Starting with a dress because Gaster always needs some pretty clothes!#His cute little angel wings expanded into a shawl :D With a feather-themed dress as well #I was thinking he'd look good in a bleeding-heart pigeon getup - just a little on the nose symbolism hehe - but it'd be very stark as well #But I mean Monsters don't bleed it's fine probably it's just a pop of bright red! Doesn't mean anything!#Thinking about the symbolism of his decorative wings normal-like as well...and of Gerson talking about the Angel of Death.....hmmmm #I'm sure it's nothing haha :)#Thinking again about Toriel taking issue with Gaster's new hole punches but not necessarily of her knowing what they mean #He has to be careful how much he shares of his progress! If she knew what might she make of him? Of them?#Two new little things to be subjugated? Or worse? All the more reason to keep them secret #I like both so much but hmmm he also wouldn't be held as accountable if he kept them secret #It's interesting as well - Gaster had a lot of growing pains with his experiments initially - I wonder how much Fell!Gaster struggled?#He always seems so placid and put together but surely Something breaks him - hard to avoid where and how he is now #Maybe not forever but just for a moment! A moment of weakness is all it takes after all ♪#All the more reason to have safeguards in place!#Like teaching the boys how to heal! :0 Fellplates!Gaster would be able to heal wouldn't he? But nobody else could haha #Would the boys be able to from the beginning? Or do Fell Monsters have to develop it? :0 Through inaction or through intention? Hm ♪#It'd be nice proof of concept if they could heal :) No time like the present!

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fairyroses · 3 days

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He was about to kill you, Lex. Or divulge something you didn't want me to know.

— SMALLVILLE, "Forever" (4.21)

+ bonus from "Arctic" (7.20):

#smallville #smallvilleedit #svedit #lex luthor #jason teague #lionel luthor #clark isn't in these scenes but they're still very much #clex #sv 4x21 #sv 7x20 #dcmultiverse #my gifs #'why can't you see what's right in front of your face lex?' god. god. godddd.#I think there's a really interesting discussion to be had (with many potential viewpoints)#re: to what extent lex actually knew the truth either consciously or subconsciously at any particular time #and how much he was just in denial about it (and why)#I'm not really prepared to have that discussion in these tags but like #let's face it - lex figured out that clark had powers all the way back in 1x12 #just because clark convinced him he was wrong at the time doesn't mean he just forgot that whole thing #and yet it seemed like the more seasons went on and the more obvious the truth became #especially the fact that clark was so heavily tied to all the alien weirdness of smallville #the more lex seemed to (subconsciously?) push back against accepting or recognizing that truth #I mean that's literally what he's doing in the 4x21 scene with jason #so it's like he both desperately wanted to know clark's secret but also didn't want to know at all #and that's just SO interesting #I mean jesus the 7x20 scene is supposed to be peak evil lex and yet he STILL has to be pushed into accepting the truth #and he does so with his eyes glistening because yeah he wanted to know clark's secret once upon a time but he never wanted THIS #(remember when lex told jonathan in s1 that he just wanted clark to have a happy normal life bc clark was such a good person?#and then he's told in 7x20 that to save the world he has to KILL clark and take that life away from him hahaha [crying] it's fine I'm FINE)#wow I really said 'I'm not prepared to have this discussion' and then just. proceeded to have it anyway huh. lmao oops

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froghwon · 8 months

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you can be anything ♥*♡∞:｡.｡

#nctinc #kpopco #nct dream #mark #renjun #jeno #haechan #jaemin #chenle #jisung #vicsedits #7dream #i made jisung allen for comedic purposes. but he can be a barbie too 💖💖#any 90s babies remember what the barbie slogan was as a kid? i swear it used to be 'be who you want to be'#icb its their 7th anniversary. i forget they debuted so young D:#i mean they seem to have grown up relatively fine so >.<#i hope they continue to grow up well and healthy <3 #and keep putting out bops!!! and continue to grow musically and wtv #i just need them to continue with the consistent pop tracks 🙏 they never disappoint 🙏🙏

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chansoooo1-blog · 5 months

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The way Carmy starts avoiding and distancing himself from Sydney after he starts going out with Claire. Like you can't make this shit up??

#like why would you purposely avoid someone who you would consider a friend after you start dating someone #THERE IS NO PLATONIC EXPLAINATION FOR THIS #i mean you could argue that this was because he was avoiding the restaurant #but i dont think this was the case because his relationship with natalie richie fak etc seemed fine??#sydcarmy

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crownspeaksblog · 6 months

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No because I absolutely loved watching ed fight! For 2 seasons we never saw him fight, he was always making his crew do it, even when was in full kraken mode, he just fires one shot and stands back and let them do the rest.

While in 2x08 he was killing left, right and center! He casually took out two English soldiers, UNARMED and used their rifle to choke them out, in a little rowboat, then he choked and broke someone's neck with ONE fucking hand while holding and READING stedes love letter with the other! Then later, on the beach, he was fighting two soldiers, while two more were coming at him and you can see that he already took out NINE others (yes i went back and counted!) Also when he took someone's rifle and put it on their shoulder and shot someone else.. I can't.. He's a fucking menace! A hot fucking menace!

I just think it's neat he went around slaughtering the English like they're nothing after he hallucinated stede, the love of his life, yelling for help!

#although I've some notes ed stabed someone in the shoulder and pulled them back and they didn't get up..#also the guy he took the rifle from didn't resist or anything and he just sort of let ed put the rifle on his shoulder lol #just a little observation that's all..#no but seriously i loved it. it was fun! also ed seemed pretty okay about killing them which fair it's the English and they took his love s #no complaints from me! again he looked really fine as hell slaughtering motherfuckers with his wet hair! 10/10 #ofmd #ofmd s2 #our flag means death #ofmd spoilers #edward teach #ofmd 2x08 #👑

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m1d-45 · 1 year

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i gobbled and devoured the post imposter things. scrumptious!! but what if poor little xiao man feels guilty for hunting or scarring us in the hunt? and please don’t feel obligated to answer, i know you’re busy

burden to bear

word count: 2.7k

-> warnings: spoilers for liyue archon quest, canon typical violence…. minor body horror? blood mention.

-> gn reader (you/yours)

taglist: @samarill || @thenyxsky || @valeriele3 || @shizunxie || @boba-is-a-soup || @yum1x || @esthelily || @turningfrogsgay

< masterlist >

during the hunt itself, xiao is driven by a need to prove himself, pushing past his instinct and the way his karma flares around the one on the throne. he sees it as a way to redeem himself, to finally scrape some of the sin off his hands. it’s a way to prove himself, and one he takes eagerly.

it’s not correct to say he’s blinded by faith, but it’s not exactly wrong either. he definitely feels, subconsciously, that something’s… off, maybe, about his god. perhaps it’s the way his vision always seems to flutter and flare, or the ice in his veins when the command to hunt is given. he feels uneasy, unsettled, finding himself rolling his shoulders and wondering if he needed to add more stretches into his routines. and yet, despite the tension in his shoulders and the twist in his stomach, he kneels, bowing his head with a swear of fealty that goes unanswered.

unacknowledged.

perhaps he had delivered it wrong?

he doesn’t think much of it, quickly dissolving from the throne room and appearing besides the statue of the seven on the west edge of liyue. looking out over jueyun karst, he knows it’s a bit fruitless to start his search there due to the vicinity to the other adepti, but the spires there are tall, filled with wiry bushes and crags of rock that are easier to hide in than may seem at first glance.

he draws his pole arm, spinning it once over his hand before tapping the end to the stone beneath him. he’s not sure why he’s so nervous—is it the fact that this is technically the first order he’s been given? is it the idea of slaughtering somebody so identical to his creator that it nearly fooled morax, who’s been alive longer than he could fathom?

or is it simply the prospect of failure?

xiao grits his teeth and steps off the edge of the floating stone, halting his fall with anemo at nearly the last possible moment.

his feelings meant nothing. orders were given, and he had to follow them.

why else was he there, if he couldn’t?

it takes him longer than he expected to find you. he’s almost impressed, really, that you managed to evade his searching eyes, that you dodged not only him but the other adepti as well, all without taking refuge in any villages or otherwise civilized areas due to the orders the millelith put out. you hid well, he could attest to that, and though he was the one to find you, it was only on accident.

he was clearing out a group of hilichurls north of the inn. he was surprised so many had settled so close to the statue of the seven, as hilichurls usually avoided concentrated elemental energy, but didn’t think too hard about it. he simply unhooked his mask from his belt, noticing the difference in strength between these hilichurls and the average, and teleported into the middle of the camp.

the first thing he heard was a spotter’s cry. the second was the mitachurls’—archons, there were three—roar as they hefted their weapons. the final one was the intricate chanting of the abyss, but not any incantation he recognized.

he kept himself half in smoke as he danced around the edge of the camp, taking out the archers while he tried to find the abyss mage. he could catch glimpses of hydro bubbles through the walls of the hut, but the steps were covered in frost-

he barely ducked under the swing of a mitachurl’s axe, slashing his spear along its side as he slipped away, darting across the path of one charging with a large stone shield. it clipped his shoulder despite his efforts, pain spiking down his arm, but he didn’t pay attention to the injurh. normally he wouldn’t be this distracted, but two abyss mages and three mitachurls in one camp could only spell bad news. the best he could likely do was to leave and grab back-up, but who? the millelith were busy, morax and the adepti were on their own search…

xiao quickly climbed onto the roof of the hut, jamming his spear between two of the logs to keep grip on the woven roofing. the grass was damp, squishing uber this feet, likely from whatever hydro magic the mage was busy with within it. it likely wasn’t the smartest idea to stand on the roof, but this area of liyue was mostly plains, with little cover from the charging mitachurls. he needed a moment, if only a short one, to hash out a plan to deal with the camp.

the three mitachurls were standing besides the hut, two with shields and one with a crackling axe, electro dancing along the blade. xiao shifted, pivoting around the peak of the hut to move away from that one, the grass roof squishing below his feet.

the mitachurl’s ear twitched.

he shoved himself off the roof just as the mitachurl slammed the flat of its blade onto the roof, the whole shack shaking. electricity swarmed across the waterlogged roofing, reaching the opposite edge just as xiao dropped off it, landing between the other two mitachurls. they didn’t charge, nor attack, their motivations only made clear when the hiss of cryo froze out the lingering moisture in the air in front of him, effectively boxing him in.

the abyss mage swayed in its circle, staff glowing a sharp blue from within its bubble of frost.

“leave, adeptus,” it hissed, waving its staff in a circle. “you have no place here.”

xiao didn’t reply, instead picking apart his options. he couldn’t do significant damage to the shield mitachurls without utilizing his burst to destroy their shields, but that didn’t cover the mage at all… and he was still wet from the roof, so the mage would be able to freeze him within the time he had drawn in enough anemo energy to wield his mask with any level of efficiency…

he flexed his hand around his polearm. how had he gotten into this situation? his only options were to get lucky or teleport away, but even the latter of those relied on the first.

luck. how useless was he, to rely on luck-?

“‘adeptus’?”

the abyss mage startled at the voice, the cryo it had been swirling dissipating. both he and it turned to the side, to the entrance to the hut, where a figure could be seen just beyond the mitachurl.

his first instinct was that it was his god, and he briefly relaxed under the knowledge that he’d get out of this in mostly one piece.

his second was to recognize the torn clothing and dirt-smeared skin, and realize that you could never be his god.

xiao’s eyes narrowed, his spear twisting towards you faster than the distracted mage could react. you, his target, the one he had been seeking out, were hiding behind the abyss. he should have expected it, in truth, figured out the one known for going against the rules of nature would side with the most unnatural force, but that was not for now.

not now, when he was launched forward by the power of anemo, his spear driving him forward, barely skimming the mitachurl in favor of his true target: you.

your eyes barely had the chance to dart in his direction.

xiao was, in truth, not the first one to see you.

many villagers had glimpsed you running around the outskirts of their villages, plucking apples and sunsettias off trees and taking mint from their gardens and leaving bundles of sweet flowers behind instead. they’d seen you, face half-covered in a poor mask made of scraps, your clothes that of the haphazard stitches of the hilichurls, which helped you blend into teyvat a bit more at the price of comfort. many had seen you and assumed you were a run of the mill thief, perhaps one taking advantage of the current hunt since the millelith were occupied. they wryly called you clever, warning the traveling merchants about you, the one they glimpsed at inane hours of night.

he wasn’t the first to see you, by far. he was, however, the first to recognize you.

he was the first to lay eyes upon your form and realize the truth, to realize that the blood seeping into your clothes was the color of stars and galaxies, to recognize that your heart beat blue.

the argument could be made that the hilichurls were the first, or perhaps the mages that had taken you in and brought you food, but it was not them that gathered you into their arms and whisked you away in a flash of teal, uncaring of the spike of cryo that drove into their side at the last minute. the hilichurls did not walk with frosted-over limbs, the abyss did not cry with a throat full of ice, calling for assistance in undoing their own crime.

xiao couldn’t decide whether it was lucky or not that baizhu was in the pharmacy, speaking with herbalist gui over the front desk. on one hand, it was best to have the most experienced healer in liyue at your side, but on the other..

“adeptus xiao, what is-…..”

confusion, then anger, then realization, all flashing over his face in an instant before he tilted his head and walked quickly to a back room, xiao following.

he busied himself with picking the ice off his body and clothes, ignoring the shake of his hands and the stench of blood in the room. the mage had pulled you from the point of his spear, but he still hit the side of your stomach, and he could tell it was messy.

knocks sounded at the door but baizhu turned them away sharply, only allowing qiqi to pass him a bowl of lotus seeds. he was focused, changsheng slithering off his shoulders to grab supplies as needed. time seemed to slow to a crawl, like xiao had entered a domain without an exit, filled with the iron smell of blood and the never ending chips of ice he peeled from his skin. it left behind stinging wounds and red marks, but he couldn’t find it in him to care.

what was his brief moment of injury compared to a scar upon his god?

the moment that baizhu had stopped, all but collapsing into a chair and wiping off his hands with a tired call of ‘it’s done. the foundation will be okay.’ xiao had stood and left, biting his tongue through the protests of both his own body and the doctor.

he’d given changsheng his confession, but he did not wish to stick around and hear his verdict.

weeks later, morax came and visited him at the inn, carrying with him a plate of almond tofu and an apology. xiao leaned against the furthest edge of the balcony, curled around the plate, staying as far as he could from the one with your aura imprinted upon him.

he felt it, when zhongli had first come up the stairs. the shock, then the warmth, the all-encompassing comfort that soothed the pain from the bruising on his shoulder. he felt it, and knew that he did not deserve it.

“it’s not your fault,” zhongli insisted, baritone words colored with unreturned sympathy. “the fake… had fooled us all. even me. i cannot hold your actions against you when i myself would have done the same.”

and maybe that was true. maybe he would have drawn his own weapon, pierced your skin himself, acting on the orders of one who dared to take the place of the divine, but that was irrelevant.

xiao was the one who had hurt you. and it was entirely his fault.

almond tofu, his favorite dish, tasted bitter and sour on his tongue, almost akin to the pain medication that zhongli had made him drink after noticing how cautious he was with his injured arm. he’d made him take the first dose in front of him and swear to take the rest, with a long monologue about taking care of himself tacked on afterwards, but it was for nothing. aside from the first night he had it, xiao hadn’t touched the bottle. it sat on his nightstand, beside a bed he hardly used, taunting him when he returned earlier than usual.

he could take it. there was nothing stopping him from doing so, and he probably should if he wanted to return to his duties quicker. but every time he picked up the glass, thumb tracing over the engravings as he undid the top, he hesitated.

he could take it. he probably should. but did he deserve to?

you were still recovering, possibly still bedridden weeks later. your blood still stained his spear, dripping down to his palms, pale and scarred skin marked further with the blue and purple swirls of his sin. you were still in pain, still healing from a spear to your side, and he was here, reaching for medicine for a sore shoulder?

(it was worse than that. bone had knocked against bone, bruising beneath where muscle could reach. it ached even when he sat as still as possible, dragging him out of every attempt to meditate. the dark purple splotches stretched beyond his clothing, reaching across his back and up his neck, making nearly any action flare the wound. it was far beyond an over-exerted muscle or a particularly tiring day, and yet even the worst nights of his pain were staved off by the memory of having to wash blue off his blade. even as the latch on the bottle was undone, the lip pressed to his, he could never bring himself to drink it)

(even the small droplet of it on the rim, tasting of qingxin extract and violet grass, threatened to make him sick. how dare he?)

yes, it would likely only get him into more trouble were he found out, but he was careful not to be. whenever the wind brought him the heavy presence of geo, zhongli’s familiar footsteps climbing the stairs, he snatched the bottle and emptied it into the stone carving on the balcony, letting the medicine soak into the soil beneath it. it splashed when he was sloppy, the deep purple medicine appearing blue on the stone, sparking a memory that weighed harder on the pit in his stomach.

even as he handed the bottle over to zhongli, his jaw clenched from the strain on his shoulder. the action was stiff, jerky, but evidently smooth enough that it had passed his assessment.

zhongli tucked the bottle away, surprisingly not drawing out a new one.

“i am proud of you, and of the progress you have made,” he said, golden eyes softening in the light of dusk. “well done, xiao.”

how strange, he thought, watching him leave, that the very action that made his vision swim with unshed tears was one that was praised.

he wouldn’t complain, of course. he never would. this pain was his to bear, just as the burden of your bloodshed was his to shoulder. he was well aware his pain could never take back yours—though he wished, desperately, that he could move your injury to him. he wanted to be able to take on the physical reminder of his defect, to take the hit of his own spear to spare you from his lapse in judgement. he would take it, take ten times the pain you endured, if only it meant that your skin was free of his scars.

it would be an honor to assist the divine, even at the price of his own life.

#genshin #genshin impact #sagau #self aware genshin #genshin sagau #sagau impostor au #genshin self aware au #sagau xiao #xiao #xiao x reader #xiao x you #genshin x reader #sagau x reader #*lying through my teeth* what do you mean of course i don’t have favorites #hey writer tip here: just write. i know you think it’s gonna be bad. i know it’ll likely seem strange and off-key. guess what? write.#just do it. best advice ever. who cares if it’s shit? you can rewrite it later! once you get through the bad and into the groove it’s fine!!#you’ve gotta expel your Bad Words to get to the good stuff. take it from me i always rewrite my beginnings whenever i post #the first paragraphs are gonna suck! and that’s okay! just keep goin baby!! you’ll get it eventually!!#oh btw just so it’s clear: zhongli’s proud of him for taking the meds not for his um. violent acts.#it’s meant to be a ‘thank you for trusting me and accepting help’ but the twist is: he ISNT #i love xiao. with all my heart. i absolutely adore him. he is my beloved little blorbo.#but good lord do i like to see him cry sometimes.

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