#i just want us to give it a chance ok

[rains-pace]

YOUR CITY GAVE ME ASTHMA - Wilbur Soot

#wilbur soot #your city gave me asthma #ycgma #my art #hiii ive been working on this for quite a while now!! and it's done! #ive had this idea for so long #and i finally got a chance to do it #and i was gonna wait to post it until the anniversary but i dont want to wait lol #this is actually a project for school #so i originally wanted to keep it all in the original color palette of the album #but my prof recommended using more of a color story with it? #and so i shifted the colors a bit throughout #also this is like. idk. a blend of cc and c wilbur designs #like i just wanted to mkae illustrations that fit the vibe each song gives me #and i wanted to be able to follow this character who is like. obviously based on wilbur cuz its his album #idk idk idk im just glad its done!!! #this is one of my favorite albums ever it means so much to me. like saline solution is my favorite song #auuhghhh #ok thank you im gonna stop rmabling #& btw if you want to see me talk about mcyt i do that over at @duodusk . im very embarrassing over there though #adding this on after the big surge of notes (which. THANK YOU BTW WHAT THE HELL)

[silenthillbunni]

.

#it went!!! idk lately my pain treshhold has been so low bc im in pain all the time #so i just dont wnna be in pain anymore... he said that now it'll still hurt for a few days T-T #but he wasnt exactly sure what it was but i had.. a cavity?? #im not rlly sure abt the english terms for all of this but the tooth is dying lol #but instead of immediately killing it nd getting a root fill he said that we should give the tooth a chance #so he fixed what he could fix #i hate dentist treatments bc of all the air nd water nd my anxiety i need to swallow constantly #but this time i actually told them abt it nd he was very helpful sksks #he even said 'ok now take a break nd swallow' so i didnt need to be so anxious #nd it was a relief bc he wasnt bad at all. he was actually rlly nice nd easy to talk to phewww #it cost abt $80 so i can manage to be without that until next week!!!! #so yeah it went much better than i had anticipated so im happy abt that #but yeah the problem still isnt 100% fixed yet so im still not relieved #he said i had a cavity in my other tooth as well but that we needed to check that at another time #im so frustrated bc i brush my teeth 2/day i use mouthwash i floss.... #and for the last 7 months i havent even had any sugar!!!!! like why did this still happen.. o.o #oh nd he also said that i probably clench my teeth nd yeah i do that a lot more than i've realized #your teeth arent supposed to be touching!! never!! only when u eat #my teeth.... are touching pretty much all day omg. bc im so tense nd anxious #he said that he couldnt be sure bc he didnt have enough info to go on but that could have contributed to this #well well... i did it nd went even if i didnt want to #hopefully my tooth will be better now. nd i have another appt in may to see what i could get done further #if financial aid for it gets approved tho it might not #but yeah.. god dental pain nd issues is my no. 1 fear bc im poor nd i cant afford it

[transmechanicus]

Brb crying on this friday night

#my stuff #my ex texted me they’re having a rough time but they refuse to let me help #i feel so thoroughly useless to them and i feel like they should/will give me up as a friend if i’m not useful #like if we’re really friends like i think we are LET ME DO SOMETHING TO SUPPORT YOU #i’m actively offering to help and they refuse every time and it hurts bc i know they’re struggling and if we were partners still they would #they would let me support them like they deserve #i know at least some of what they’re struggling with is beyond my control but there’s a non-zero chance part of why they’re upset is me #in the sense that they’re struggling to navigate our friendship after they broke up with me #and i don’t want that to be a source of stress if so. i’ve offered to provide any and all reassurances that might help them #but they’ve said they don’t need to hear anything and need to work it out on their own #how’s uhhh how’s that going for you champ?? #they need support and i’m willing to give it but they won’t admit it even at cost #so i just get to sit here and hope they’ll be ok. and that i’m not making it worse in some way i can’t see #Spotify

[nerosdayinanime]

crippling need to draw this image i have of sabigiyuu pressed back to front, giyuu holding onto the arm thats hand is splayed over his stomach/ribs, easily leaning his head back onto sabito's shoulder, his soft barely-there hold on giyuu's neck with their cheeks gently pressed together

#until the vibe to Do Shit comes back just imagine it for me ok? plz? im almost to tears thinking of them being soft #giyuu's trust in him so complete its second-nature and sabito's unwavering support & passion #FUCK GOD DMANIT I CANT USE WORDS TO DESCRIBE HOW THEY FUCKING FEEL ABT EACHOTHER. GIYUU BIG DOE EYES @ SABITO LIKE HES HIS ENTIRE WORLD & #SABITO HOLDING HIM LIKE EVWRYTHING HE NEEDS IS RIGHT THERE IN HIS HANDS. #FUCK #GOD THEY MAKE ME FUCKING INSANE I CANT EXPRESS HOW INTENSE IT IS AT THE SAME TIME. THEYRE EACHOTHER'S *EVERYTHING* SABITO'S PASSION GIVEN #DIRECTION & GIYUU'S UTTER DEVOTION HAVING SOMEWHERE TO SHINE #THERES A REASON VIGI!AU SABITO THOUGHT FAKING HIS DEATH WAS THE ONLY WAY TO KEEP THEM BOTH ALIVE & REGRETTED IT SO DEEPLY ANYWAY #CLAN AU: SHIT MARRIAGE +ADULTERY GIYUU BROKEN AND HURTING YEARNING FOR SCRAPS AND SABITO BEING THERE TO HEAL HIS WOUNDS & GIVE HIM FEASTS #THEY WANT TO GIVE EACHOTHER THE WORLD THEY WANT TO GIVE EACHOTHER THEIR VERY SELVES FOR THE CHANCE OF HAVING KNOWN THEY WERE LOVED #WHOLLY AND UNHESITATING #i need to make them worse in my aus theyre not unhinged about eachother enough they need to be sewn together at the hip souls entwined #auuhuhh #i need to go to sleep #sorry for the mental illness moment ill do it again #sabigiyuu #loserboy giyuu posting #fratboy sabito posting #sabito #giyuu

[krysmcscience]

Saw this prompt for incorrect OC quotes and couldn't resist with a bunch of my Breach goobers. Some of them would absolutely say these things word for word in canon if I gave them half the chance to, though. XD

They're in order of when they showed up in person - Qīng, Ghost, Red, Marisol, Shio, Cam, Daruk, Tawoos, and Alondra - as well as some important honorable mentions who have only been mentioned or gotten dialogue - Star, Blake, and Creation.

Star's design is a slight spoiler, I suppose, but it doesn't reveal if they're human or impostor, so it's all good. Creation's "design" also isn't a spoiler at all, because They can look however They want, LOL. As for Shio...some of you who have seen the body horror I've done of them may be wondering why they look so normal here, but I promise there are Reasons. :3c

In other news, will I be making a liar out of Shio in an upcoming Breach canon divergence? ..........Maybe~ >:3c

#original characters #breach #among us #(technically lol) #look i even revealed what their colors would be - as if it wasn't already patently obvious #aside from creation but - uh - ignore them (trust me it's better this way) #meanwhile qīng's color isn't even available which is a Damn Shame #there needs to be a sky blue already ffs #cyan ain't cutting it #if it were an actual lobby qīng would waffle so hard between blue and cyan and would miss his chance to pick either XD #the closest quote to canon is cam's because she REALLY wants a different job and she'll take yours in a fucking HEARTBEAT #meanwhile the closest quote to BECOMING canon is creation's and it is taking all of my willpower to resist their insistence that i allow it #the most incorrect quote of all is definitely blake's - he is so mad at me for drawing this and calling out how he feels about his old job #the biggest lie here is red's - he absolutely thinks about breaking rules and does it a lot more than he'd like to admit #someone give poor tawoos a fucking break - they didn't ask for this #i promise that marisol is more than The Bitchy Sunflower Girl - just give her some time - i promise #alondra has other aspects too but she would be weirdly offended if you tried to assure her that she's more than just Squeaky Mouse Girl #if daruk ever had to go to anger management he would accidentally incite a rage riot just like dan did in that episode of dan vs #ghost i'm sorry but your fashion sense is incomprehensible and i don't even know how i come up with half the stuff i put you in #did blake steal the jacket off of crinklytinfoil's pink/chase from the skeld? absolutely not - he borrowed it cuz those two would be BUDS #these tags are ridiculous #ok im done now

[guideaus]

this is probably a good a place as any to drop the manga

#personal #noragami lb #maybe i'll give it another chance some time like welcome to the ballroom but hmmm #theres just too much heterosexuality (which leads to excuses to being misogynistic) and its VERY afraid (?) of being genuine #i really dont like its inability to be serious. tough girlboss here decides to be vulnerable and yato does this and jokes abt how she #was wide open and they go back to fighting but in a 'funny' way now #then the end of the chapter a diff character tells hiyori how yato has never had serious followers. he's used as a misfortune god #no one wants to associate with and is used to that and is positively effected when hiyori says she wont forget him #it really does remind me of welcome to the ballroom. it has an ok idea and then cant stop making jokes and being sexist #edit: and the next ch is him possessing her body and causing trouble. the author is again showing her underwear

[horrorwebs]

why are men literally the fucking worst

#theres a guy in one of my uni friend groups who has a crush on my friend also from the friend group #and she feels so so uncomfortable plus she hasnt done ANYTHING thatd give a hint that she likes him back. bc she doesnt #and now she doesnt feel ok around because hes so attached to her and so so needy and its like. well. way to fuck it up dude. fuck you #he has been acting so strange lately and not in a good way. strange awkward and needy and like. possesive. #her and i also have another friendgroup where frankly i feel much better with and she does too. and its like. well the guy is always like #butting in but now really being part of anything? like its not like he comes over to the grouo to be with all of us hes just sort of . there #talking only to her or sometimes me but its like not nice its weird and annoying #ALSO HES SO PATRONIZING TOWARDS HER ITS AWFUL #AND hes like. a bit older.... where its not like. the weirdest age gap i dont think so. but it IS a bit weird considering some of the things #he has said. like the other day he made a comment about how my friend 'well shes so young like people her age sometimes dont get [x]' like? #if you think she is SOOO young and SOOO out of touch with people your age well why the fuck are you asking others if you have a chance w her #get away from her really #sidenote: today she was telling me and a different friend about this problem and my other friend said it was really uncomfortable and bad + #that he used to think the guy had a thing for ME BEFORE??? and i dont know if he also thought -i- had a thing for him but please god no. #even the hypothetical made me feel super uncomfortable. also i used to feel like that a bit like he might like me and it was bad and gross #so i dropped a comment that let him believe i was a lesbian i think? also got much colder towards him . like. thats what you get fucker #about the lesbian thing i meant that he told me about a friend of his that had it hard coming out as a lesbian and i said like oh yeah being #like that was hard for me also. finding out i was not straight was tough etc . #dont remember if i said the word lesbian i dont think so but i did say i like girls and i didnt mention boys at all so i hoped itd be enough #also people dont really -get- what being asexuas means + didnt want to tell him im ace + techically i Can like boys bc romantic attraction #is undefined to me but i was definetely not going to tell him that bc 1. im much more prone to like a girl and 2. not trying to get his hope #up. #so anyway it was gross to realize other people saw it too so i mightve actually not been insane to think he had a crush on me but it was bad #and also. i really need for my friend to be comfortable in class so i might have to kill him who knows. well see #spikeposting #personal

[mintjeru]

super tuna!!!!!!! my entry for the wootteo event happening on weverse rn

open for better quality | no reposts | ID under the cut

[Image description: A digital drawing of Wootteo reeling in a tuna from the ocean. Wootteo looks at the fish with star-shaped eyes. The tuna fish is teary-eyed and terrified. A bright blue sky with a couple of clouds is seen in the background.]

#wootteo #jin #bts #the astronaut #super tuna #fanart #myart #doodle #not sure how many bts related tags i can use without being out of line so i'll leave it at that #also as promised i'm going to be sappy on main for a bit so if you don't want to see that you can ignore the tags #i'm waving at the armys who follow me hello i am one of you!! #i made a weverse acc yesterday bc i wanted to participate #it's probably a one in a million chance i'll actually win the raffle but it's still A Chance #anyway. when i first watched the video where jin explained wootteo's design #and he said wootteo is going to be there for us when he can't. definitely cried #and ofc the astronaut. not only the lyrics but the symbolism in the mv?? #i was ok watching the mv and reading the lyrics #but the moment i saw c.hris martin introduce the song in the c.oldplay concert. man. i broke down #i know this will be temporary but they've been by my side for 8 years now and they've seriously given me hope when i wanted to just give up #i used to not understand when fans would say their favorite artists' music saved them but i get it now. i really do #i always think of that one quote from that one ending ment #'if we could reduce your pain from 100 to 99 that's enough for our existence to have meaning' #and they have. so many times #i know it's not over and they will be 7 again but it's going to take some getting used to #if you see me sobbing later this month you'll know why #in any case i am physically crying now but it's ok bc i love them so much #so come on weverse staff just draw my name and give me the wootteo merch

[killuaisaprincess]

Cinderella

THEY ARE CUTE!

Zushi has a crush.

On his best friend's brother, someone who was also his friend when they were younger…

It’s confusing. Learning Nen was much easier somehow…

He couldn’t ask master; it was much too embarrassing… and besides, he'd probably bring up some statistic that would make all of Zushi’s self-confidence plummet. He couldn’t ask master’s master; she was scary… Alluka is his best friend! Which makes it all the worse! But she had just teased him and told him probably way more info than Killua himself would ever want anyone to know… so now he feels a little guilty.

But that sad look in those deep blue eyes of his… it’s like an ocean of sadness, and Zushi wants to see a smile against those pretty features like when they were younger…

But he’s no good. He doesn’t know what to say or do… he’s definitely not Alluka, who was the only person who could bring her brother out of a melancholy state, and he’s not Gon…

Zushi doesn’t even know what happened… A-and he has no right to pry!

But he can’t think of what to do, so he’s sulking at the punch table, fiddling around with a glass in his hands.

Killua hadn’t danced with a single person tonight… s-so maybe!

Oh, come on… who’s he kidding… it took him years to conquer Heaven’s Arena; something like this seems…

Zushi sighs out loud vehemently, placing the drink down and playing with his champagne-colored bowtie, bright against the pure white of his suit.

He doesn’t know how to dance…

He’ll just stay glued here, in this spot, until the party is over, he decides; until he sees Killua slowly move away from the edge of the balcony, clearly intending to leave.

H-he’s got this!

༶•┈┈⛧┈♛ ♛┈⛧┈┈•༶

HE DOESN’T HAVE THIS!

He’s sweating buckets to the point he thinks his shoes must be flooding.

“O-OSU!”

He tugs at the edge of his tux, swallowing thickly.

It’s not hard to sweat just in the presence of Killua. He’s like from another dimension. The way the light pink dress he wears flows down, like a cascade of waves, highlighting his petite frame, his slender shoulders, the sleeves draping past them. His lips are the same complimentary pink, blushing his skin in spots as well.

Killua stops fiddling with his silver locks, his somber expression twisting for a second, something akin to joy, as he looks back.

“Osu. It’s been a while… you’ve gotten strong, huh?”

There’s a small catlike grin on his face for a moment.

S-strong? Oh, right!

Zushi steps forward, standing next to Killua, rigid as a board.

“Osu! B-but I’m still nothing compared to you two!”

Wrong move.

Killua’s expression crumbles so fast, Zushi wishes he could stuff the words back in his mouth. Killua physically recoils and draws closer to himself, wrapping his arms around his stomach.

“I can’t speak for Gon… but you’re definitely stronger than me now… you train with Alluka, right? She’s gotten strong too. She can take care of herself… so I don’t really train anymore. I don’t like fighting…”

It had always been a necessity, not fun. There was only a short time it was fun for Killua…

Tears fall hot on his cheeks before he can stop them, and he wipes them away, smiling bitterly. He wants to stop them. But they don’t…

Killua dips to the floor, trying to hide, sniffing.

Oh no.

Zushi wants to disappear. His heart aches, and he looks around desperately.

Alluka!

He can’t help Killua… he wants to. But what can he do…?

Confidence! Master’s master said it is the most important thing!

He leans over slowly, gently placing a hand on Killua’s shoulder.

“Killua?”

Killua looks up, tears still pooling in his eyes, and Zushi fumbles in his pocket, pulling something out and holding it outward for Killua.

Except it’s not a handkerchief. It’s his patchwork coin purse, and nervously he draws it back, fumbling to tug out the small piece of fabric and handing it to Killua.

“U-Um! Killua-san! S-someone as pretty as you shouldn’t cry!”

Zushi hears a small gasp out of Killua’s lips, and the red around his nose turns an even deeper hue, and Zushi isn’t sure whose face is more red, feeling his own on fire, still awkwardly holding the handkerchief out, and you can hear a pin drop.

Killua gently takes the handkerchief from Zushi’s hand, his small and slender fingers brushing against Zushi’s own, and his heart swells again, and Zushi swallows, trying to keep his heart from leaving. Killua’s pretty… and cute…

Killua says he doesn’t fight anymore, but Zushi knows Killua is still strong, but he can’t help but feel the urge rise in his chest to protect him.

“U-uh! I know you don’t fight anymore, b-but! If you want to, I mean! I’d really like if you came and watched a match of mine, osu!”

“Eh?”

Killua says it so softly he almost doesn’t hear it, and his head feels like it’s swirling as he looks up; Killua gently wipes under his nose using the handkerchief before placing it in his lap. His face is still cutely red, and he looks to the side, brushing a strand of hair behind his ear.

“W-well Alluka has a match… that-that day, b-but! I guess I could see how strong you’ve gotten…”

Killua looks over, smiling softly, adding.

“Osu!”

#;windy’s stuff #hxh #killua #hunter x hunter #killua zoldyck #Zushi hxh #Zukini #ZERO FUCKS TO GIVE THE TAGS WILL ENJOY MY RARE PAIR CRACKSHIP #In actuality I expect either nothing or hate but 😤 THEY ARE CUTE I DO WHAT I WANT AS QUINA WOULD SAY #GK always number one in my heartbut I’ve had this rare pair for two years now #JUST LET THE CURIOSITY DRAW YOU INNN COME ON JOIN THE DARK SIDE I HAVE COOKIES #Actually it’s wholesome 🥺 #ZUKINI OSU! 😤🥺 #Zushi x Ki ZuKini CUTE RIGHT CAME UP WITH IT MYSELF! Another fun thing about ships that don’t exist! #KI IS A PRINCESS 🥺🤧😤😤😤 Ki in dresses 🤲👌👌👌🎀 #C-CUTE #Ki is 22 and Zushi is 21 in this! I’m assuming Zush is the same age as Alluka! #I actually really find their dynamic cute 🥺🙏🤧 #🥺🤲 Ki is t-tiny and fluffy and cute 🥺🙏🤲🤧 KI IS ALWAYS TINY AND PRINCESS 🥺 #My Ki is always 5’3/5’4 in aged up aus and Gon is 6’6 AND IM LOVE THAT BIG GON AND TINY KI! #BUT KI IS TINY AND PRINCESS even when he’s about the same height as Zushi 🥺🙏 #THERYE REALLY CUTE GIVE THEM A CHANCE 🥺🤲 #ITS SUCH A DIF DYNAMIC THAN IM USED TO BUT I LOVE ZUKINI (and I love that ship name I came up with 🥺) #Zushi is a shy nervous bug and Ki is a cute shy BABEY 🥺🥺🥺🥺🤲🤲🤲😭😭😭 ZUSHI WOULD TREAT KI LIKE THE PRINCESS HE IS OK #Ki is so cute 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🤧🤧🤧 MY HEART CANNOT GO ON THEY ARE REALLY CUTE OKAY! OMG MY HEART AHHHHHHHH #KI TUCKING HIS HAIR BEHIND HIS EAR SHYLY IS SMTH I LIVE FORRRRRRR 😤 HES SO CUTE #ACTUALLY LOVED THIS IM GONNA CRY ITS SO CUTE #ZUSHI IS JUST EVERYONE WHO DOESNT LOVE KI AND WANT HIM TO BE PROTECTED AND LOVED AND THINK HES CUTE! KI IS BABEY 🥺🥺🥺🥺🤲🤲🤲😭😭😭😭🤧🤧🤧🤧 #BEST THING ABOUT NOT EXISTING! Slight fear everyone would leave until I realize there really aren’t that many people to leave and even if #I do end up alone! I will not stop writing and making edits 😤

[politicallyinvolvedpandabear]

Wow, I really love radfems so much. Anyone who, like, gets it. Understands. 

I like consuming entertainment/media a lot, and I especially do it now that I have more free time and want something to enjoy during these trying times, but it just occurred to me why even though I usually like what I watch, it’s been doing nothing for me for the most part. 

It’s the men. It’s because it’s made by men. Not only is the fandom super male-dominated and therefore male (looking up an underage female character and getting unwanted porn of her lmao), I’m so used to the disappointment and whatnot that I forgot what the cause and reason was. 

Basically, when I surround myself with women or see female takes, I feel much happier and connected to others/positive/cheerful. But when I watch something made by a man and can feel it through the sexualization and uncomfortable everything and all of that, then I totally clock out and am disconnected from humanity/others like, “Ok, disappointment. No thanks. No more.” 

I like to check tumblr quite often and sometimes I know outright that it’s because I want to see radfem blogs and regain my sanity, but yeah.... It’s really true that who you surround yourself with can influence you and your mood. Coming to this realization was nice. “It doesn’t have to be this way” <-- me and my lack of expectations for media/others

No one’s perfect, but I certainly feel a lot more love towards radfem/”TERF” blogs than I do anyone else I know (since they’re either male or are sipping the libfem Koolaid and probably wouldn’t get it). 

I hope all of y’all keep it up, being so cool and all. I’ll definitely fight for us! ✊ You’re all great. c: 

#my own rambles #i purposely don't specify or name a lot of things in detail because i dont want to be found out lol #right now my dash is divided between the radfems and the libfems i used to follow and #the difference in posts is so stark lmao #i dont unfollow because i dont mind seeing both sides #but since becoming acquainted with radfems... the libfem side is SO unintelligent hahahaha #anyway i'm surrounded by men in my fandoms but i dont HAVE to interact with them #or take the entertainment that seriously too #this is coming from someone who likes art a lot #this is quite a freeing thought... #i'll spend my time reading that article i had open from that one radfem post #i shouldnt waste my time on/with men #even by proxy through their shit art... trying to find what i want/makes me excited #yeah this is quite the revelation. i hate men after all so why am i even giving them a chance? #i wanna fix my thoughts regarding this and be more conscious about them. i definitely wanna be around women more #talking to myself haha. ok! i like this post. #i'm really so grateful and glad i found radfems #they are the coolest people i know. like... usually i feel nothing towards people. no expectation. only disappointment #but radfem posts can actually make me smile. and FEEL things. actual connection/love to other humans wow! #not just my own morals guiding me on.... me actually genuinely liking people and being curious about them #not wanting to disappoint some of my fave radfems lmao #i'm writing posts at like 2 AM again but i'll try to take these lessons into tomorrow/the future ^^ #tbh though i actually feel unused to sharing my thoughts since regular people are SO hostile and i dont want them in my notifs #radfems are human too so i dont really expect a warm welcome from them or anything #but i'd be happy to throw my thoughts into the void without the worry of someone bothering me over it... like picking a fight/being rude #this is the internet though so i'll brace myself as always i guess xD #i wanna make a post talking about my other feelings/the other aspect of my identity but idk when i'll do it #i know people have mixed opinions but i'm not doing it for THEM necessarily. i'd just like to share for fun

[orcelito]

Anyways I love futago siblings bc of the inherent drama to it & the complexity of feelings involved in it. And also I want futaba to suplex akechi in a sibling kind of way. It's not that complicated

#speculation nation #akeshu nation literally pardons him for trying to kill akira Twice #and youre caught up in futaba potentially forgiving him for killing her mom when he was 15 #& context clues tell us that he was likely pressured into killing by shido? #it's not like hes doing this shit for fun. like ok he enjoyed killing okumura bc okumura's a piece of shit capitalist #but besides that. when we get to know him we learn that he wanted to be a hero when he was a kid #& that coupled with the way he acts in 3rd semester really paints a picture #he doesnt start killing again bc he doesnt need to. & Notably he stops trying to kill akira bc shido isnt pushing for that anymore #plus i dont think futaba has to forgive him for them to be friends. it will always be something present in their minds #but in the same sort of way of akira liking akechi enough that hes willing to give him the chance to atone for Shooting Him In The Head #i believe futaba could give him the chance to atone. or at least try to be a better person. #and i just think futaba would enjoy the excuse to limitlessly bully him. #the 'you killed my mom so u cant be mean to me' card. which she would pull a lot im sure #it wouldnt always work. especially if she overused it lol. but still. #and yea idk. i can get being uncomfortable with ppl trying to wave away the fact that he killed her mom #but when it's done right. i think it's quite a compelling relationship. #her seeing herself in him. recognizing the ways they are so painfully alike. & that pain being what pushed him to the lengths he went #her sympathizing with him doesnt mean Forgiveness. it's just a potential basis for connection. #god i just keep going on about this but that person made me literally so angry #dont post ur bad takes in main tag 2k22. i dont wanna fucking read them.

[bo0zey]

my manager has kids:(😕 but i have a new resident doctor crush soooo;)😳

#i knew i didn’t stand a chance !!!!! #also i saw my first pediatric cardiac arrest today #i was okay during the code i was glad i could be helpful i just gave out flushes lol #they didn’t make it but i had a feeling that was gonna be the outcome cuz they were already in rigor mortis when they got to us #the doctor leading the code was the one i’ve recently started talking to more n he’s like rlly friendly w everyone #i wish i knew the difference between someone being nice to me and flirting w me lol #anyways he did really good leading the code as well as the other doctors doing their best n everyone else #he wanted to hold a debriefing w everyone afterwards but i stayed back to clean up the room so when mom say her baby it #wouldn’t be as traumatizing w all the blood snd gastric contents soaked towels and garbage EVERYWHERE #i wish they’d stopped the code sooner the doctor leading the code was the first to point out the baby was in rigor right at the beginning #but obviously cuz it’s a peds case they wanna do everything they can and he literally did EVERYTHING all the code meds u could possibly orde #this stupid lady next to me who had no idea what she was talking abt was like ‘wait i think i see something on the monitor’ n im like bitch? #the baby was literally PEA they’re in fcking rigor mortis stop trying to prolong this horribly aggressive mess just let it end peacefully #baby was asystole throughout the entire code..they couldn’t even intubate him cuz his jaw was clenched so tight #anyways right after everyone agreed w the leading doctor to end it the doc like put both hands on the bed and kinda #bowed his head but i saw the pained look on his face i hope he didn’t blame himself i mean he knew from the start the baby was in rigor and #he asked everyone to give the baby a moment at the end of the code #that’s when they were all gonna go debrief but i stayed behind #anyways my supervisors were asking me if i was ok n i was like yeah bc the baby looked so much more at peace when we readied the room formom #then later the leading code doctor found me and asked if i was okay and i said was fine..i felt better knowing he was already gone before #he got to the hospital and was in literal rigor mortis with a rectal temp of 94 deg F #but i didn’t want to seem too heartless bc i could tell the code had upset him and he was talking in a more quietly #concercdndd voice like he’s usually always loud and joking around like me so :( and the fact that he stopped to talk w me privately n was #genuinely wanting to know if i was okay made me ;-; cuz im not used to being comforted?? or having my emotions validated #i was like ‘yeah im fine now haha it might all hit me later when im driving home alone at the end of the shift lol’ #n he gave me a pat on the shoulder n said i did a good job ;—; #ngl i always thought he was kinda cute but i only just started talking n working w him on pts tuesday n i think he likes me???? #idk bc he’s friendly n easy to get along w everyone AS AM I but idk we talked 1-1 before n i got a Vibe 😳 from him #but anyways then i got home n had pasta n talked to my fam abt my day and told them i had my first peds cardiac arrest #then all of a sudden something in me switch??i felt myself stiffen n my eyes started watering so i went to my room n ended up crying 4 20min

[pepprs]

hi mutuals. ive been gone all day in capstone hell in part bc my advisor is basically making me restructure the entire thing and it’s literally due on saturday. also if i look at a screen for another second my eyes will explode out of my face i think. like screens are so weird and 3d to me rn and it hurts my eyes and is too up close but also im pretty sure i have a lazy eye now so that’s probably why lol. but I have a week of this left at least atp except i can’t possibly ahve a week of this left because i literalt graduate a week from today. i feel like setting everything on fire

#purrs #what is it with me and my teachers / professors changing my entire project at the last minute LOL. throwback to ap art i. senior year of #high school when i was so fucking stressed out and depressed about graduating (hmmm sound familiar 🤔💕) and i had spent literally ALL YEAR do #doing my stupjd breadth and composition. or whatever it was like the names of the 2 stupid categories w head to do and i spent the whole yEA #year doing paintings for my compositon and i didn’t finish them bc i bit off more than i could chew (hmm sound familiar 🤔💕) and got permissi #permission from her to do my last like 3-4 paintings as collages in my sketchbook and then i had to give her mt sketchbook to like physicall #physically handle them and grade them (which was mortifying bc mt sketchbooks are like my diary basically) and after she gave it back she sa #sat me own and told me that she thought i had a better chance of getting a high score if in just used my sketchbook collages + some RANDOM #SKETCHBOOK PAGES that i had just been doing for fun and in my free time. instead of the paintings. thst i had spent all year fucking #murdering myself over. and iwas so angry but i went with it and i only got a 4 LMFAOOOOOOOO like this is just a repeat of that where he’s li #like you have to redo your entire fucking soi and break down everything etc etc and i swear to god i’ll get like a C. and at this point i do #don’t care. i almost broke down crying to him i was trying so hard to hold it together but i was telling him how i am worried about changing #so much of this right now not because I don’t care but because im exhausted and i DESPERATELY want and need to be done bc it’s been like #2 weeks of this at least. and he said nothing to that (in part bc i didn’t even look at him when i said it bc i was too embarrassed and bc i #said something else right after to lighten the mood bc i was too embarrassed) but like. lol still. this all sucks TREMENDOUSLY. i literally #am graduating in one week and it feels like i still have a month left and i have no fucking idea honwim gonna do this bc the stupid paper i #have been trying to write for the last 2 days he basically told me i have to redo in its entirety AND THE THING IS ITS 10 FUCKING PERCENT OF #MY ETIRE GRADE LKKE THIS IS SO STUPID HELPPPPPPPPPPPP help. this is so stupid and my faculty mentors can’t help me and im like ok maybe i ai #will go lie in the street right now. also not counting seeing glimpses of my roommates i haven’t been around another human being in person I #in a week and 2 days and ive only left my room 3 #3x in that time span too all to go like take out the trash or some shit. so im absolutely done with everything LOL there is no way this #project is happening and i want to just dump the entire thing unfinished and say please just take it i can’t do it anymore i literally can’t #him: don’t even worry about the time rn. just pretend you have infinite time. me: crying cat meme. LIKE SIR I WOULD LIKE TO BE DONE THIS #VERY INSTANT! HAVE I NOT SUFFERED ENOUGH!!!!!!! HAVE I NOT SUFFERED ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it’s the way i have literally created THREE #fucking collections of literature in the course of doing this project and it still isn’t good enough LOLLL like i appreciate you trying to h #help me do well and give me time etc bu you have to understand i need to be done with undergrad right this second or i will explode

[groupwest]

Man this sucks. I am disappearing

#so my poppy had a heart attack he is in hospital and will either have to have a triple bypass surgery or more stints put in #I don’t know what to do :~( #I haven’t even seen him yet. everyone else has but I have to stay home and mind the dogs #I’m so worried so scared #and just #I can’t get anything for myself done. ever #everyday things get worse for everyone else and I feel like I’m disappearing. dissipating #like I’m invisible like I’m a ghost like my life is absolutely nothing #I can’t get diagnosed I can’t even go to the drs to get this implant taken out. my entire life means nothing and revolves around everyone’s #schedule but my own. I’m nothing #amd I know people care but not enough to offer help. even though all I do is help them. do I just exist to be used lol #like it feels like I have nothing inside of me no personality no will no autonomy. hardly even discernible feelings. #i don’t know what I want all I know is that I can give others what they want. I don’t know how to explain it it just feels so fucked up #anything I do want is impossible. I’ve given up on everything already. I don’t think I ever had a chance cuz Ive had no hope since childhood #I just want my family to help me again :~( did I use it all up? use all their caring up when I was a teenager. even tho I have nothing to sh #show for it. god I miss my mum so much #I miss my life so much #I miss every friendship I’ve wrecked and every person that’s left me behind. I rly hate myself and I rly want to change. #I just feel like such a ghost and I don’t know what to do #ok sorry lol. it’s fine #I just wish life would be kinder to us all

[vacant2007]

yeah, i fully get it. it’s awful that “traumadumping” as a term looks to be going the same way as gaslighting and fetishization- being specific terms that get used so broadly that it’s impossible to tell what ppl mean by it, and then used as a weapon against the vulnerable. :(

exactly, the 'impossible to tell what people mean by it' bit- that's how I feel seeing it used a lot of the time now. I wish people would be less... punitive, I guess is the word I'm looking for. See it less as a "let's punish people for doing this, if it seems like they're doing it to me" type of thing and opt for constructive communication about boundaries instead.

#i especially worry about kids #as a kid i didnt understand this stuff and i was desperate to be able to speak my mind someplace so unfortunately it was often in #public online spaces #i didnt mean any harm by it and if someone came at me out of nowhere insisting i was a terrible person i would have been terrified #or hated myself even more than i already did #so it's just very very dangerous I think to approach these situations from a place of aggression or desire to punish #or to make fun of people for behavior they might not know is inappropriate #know what i mean? #anybody can learn; you dont know whether or not they understand their own actions until you explain what they're doing #and after that if they don't want to listen ok get mad. but not before giving them a chance to correct it #and back to my original point... 'traumadumping' doesnt equal talking about trauma!! its just that theres a time and a place #and nobody is forcing you to follow accounts that talk abt trauma so please dont tell people how to use their own accounts :'/ #ask #tw vent #tw negative #negative

[semlohhh]

will never understand people who care more about others' gender identity than billionaires actively destroying the economy

#''there used to be only 3 genders!! now there are too many!!!'' ok aunty #like literally what difference does it make to your life if someone wants to identify as a sledgehammer or laptop charger #let them????? #and about the kids you seem to be so concerned about #IT IS JUST A PHASE #ALL KIDS GO THROUGH THE PLAY PRETEND TO BE SOMETHING ELSE (LIKE A CAT) PHASE #THEY WILL MOVE ON #WHY DO YOU NOT GIVE A SHIT AND JUST SHAKE YOUR HEAD AS IF YOURE FED UP OF ME WHEN I TALK ABOUT THE PEOPLE DESTROYING OUR ECONOMY #one of them doesnt make a difference on your life other than appearing on your instagram reels #the other is ruining your chances of emplyment and earning a good amount of money with a job you loce #IT IS DIRECTLY AFFECTING YOU #go fuck yourself no one asked your opinion on the subject anyways you just saw an opportunity and decided to rant #go fuck yourself #shut the fuck up #never thought people from MY GENERATION would talk like this smh