#i just want to feel safe and calm

[1101200905]

the only way i know how to get through anything is by just dissociating and inhabiting the facade of a completely different person. which feels like a thing that's not good for me but i don't know what Else to do. like I'm open to suggestions tho.

#bpd #borderline #dissociation #dpdr #trauma #my housing is really unstable rn and i need to make a lot of choices about my future really quickly and I'm scared as fuck #i just want to feel safe and calm #not sure what that's like but it sounds cool /Lh #abandonment trauma #unstable housing #no clue how to cope except complete remove myself #also ive big regressed (at least interpersonally) in the last couple weeks and it really sucks!

[astrobei]

when byler has this conversation in season 5

#hunger games catching fire the movie of all time #the visions…. i’m being plagued by them #like #peeta being like #“nobody needs me” #katniss looking at him n saying ‘i do. i need u.’ #LIKE SHE DOES #SHE NEEDS HIM #she’s always needed him!!! #look i know thg isn’t about the love triangle and the romance plot that’s the whole point i Know #but like #finding safety and comfort in someone #needing someone #wanting to build ur future w that someone once u know the future is safe #someone who calms u down and grounds u and makes u feel protected #i’m just so #tell me this is not the van scene. TELL ME THIS IS NOT THE VAN SCENE !!!! #byler #will byers #mike wheeler #/astro posts

[greg-montgomery]

sometimes i avoid watching dharma & greg bc when i do i get a little too insane about greg. that is my boyfriend!!!! my husband!!!!!!! the loml!!!!!!!!!!!! i swear in my delusional mind my greg is out there and i’m gonna meet him and we’re gonna get married <3

#he’s just perfect for me 😭😭 he is my love #everything i want 🥺🥺🥺 #i’d feel so safe with him #he’s so sweet and nice and calm and patient and GOOD #a man who refuses to hurt you ‼️ #and he also looks like a disney prince so #that’s a plus #greg 🧸

[kyber-kisses]

Y’all I am down so bad for young Elrond —-

#that’s a man I would feel safe with #I just feel so calm whenever he’s on screen #i adore him #and want to give him a smooch #the rings of power #young elrond #elrond

[mo-ok]

What's a Red without their Blue?

Chikyuu Sentai Fiveman

Gaku Hoshikawa & Ken Hoshikawa

#fiveman #chikyuu sentai fiveman #sentai #red and blue #aniki. duo. #favourite thing about these two is i dont think gaku's actor is particularly tall - ken and the girls are just tiny #love when smart calm red + angi bruiser blue #you get the feeling that gaku has spent most of his life wrangling ken from jumping head first into dangerous situations #that or ken has spent most of his life dragging gaku into fights he didnt want to be involved in #depending on how you wanna look at it lmao #ken didnt have to grow up quite as quickly as gaku and it shows in his hard headed and impulsive nature #even so gaku trusts ken to be in charge when he isnt around #he trusts that ken will keep them safe #gaku's kicked puppy heartbreak when ken goes behind his back or doubts his intentions #vs ken's overcompensation to help ease the guilt of making his big bro sad #*throws up* #gif post tag

[elftwink]

title: precipice pairing: caleb/fjord tags: fake/pretend relationship, costume parties & masquerades, implied sexual content, slow burn, not exactly canon compliant but canon adjacent, containing vague allusions to canon with no specific timeframe or setting word count: 46, 533 summary:

“So is this… worth attempting? Pretending we were invited inside and trying to sneak off to find the artifact? Especially since only one person can go inside.” “Two,” corrects Caduceus. “No plus ones,” says Nott. “Except in the case of spouses,” says Caduceus, “If you’re married, the invitation admits two.” “Caduceus!” Jester gives an overdramatic scandalized gasp. “Are you suggesting we lie about our martial status?” “I’m not suggesting anything. I’m pointing out the wording of the invitation.”

[read on ao3]

#oh my god. ok everybody [me] stay calm #widofjord #could the summary be more descriptive. yes. but i already wrote the whole damn novella so #its also rated m but tbh its probably borderline between T and M i just did M to be safe #i also feel like theres more tags i could add but i cant think of them so. here we are #really the only NECESSARY one is fake/pretend relationship. like do you or do you not want 46k words of widofjord fake marriage #actually cant believe im done. will be reblogging this like 2 times a day for the next week fyi everyone!! #mine

[mrsackermannx]

tw: sensory overload, neurodivergent coded reader.

thinking about coming home to your apartment with aki overstimulated and a little irritable to have him work it all away in seconds? the sound of his breathing is the only sound that doesn’t make you want to break out of your skin, he pulls you close, and wordless at the doorway, peeling away your coat. peeling away the outside world. he doesn’t say anything, not yet. instead he waits until you’re out of your coat and shoes, and he pulls you toward the bathroom. tea lights dotted all over, rose petals leading a trail to the door, chocolate covered fruit on a tray beside the tub.

your brows knit, and you rejoice in the sensation. they’re no longer furrowed, not when you’re looking at him. you pull on his tie, grinning at him, “hello,” you whisper, shifting the hair from his eyes. “how rude of me not to have said hello to you yet…” he smirks, shaking his head he tilts your chin and presses his mouth on yours. “not at all,” he tells you, voice soft, “i know this week’s been a lot, i feel it,” the measured, squeezes of his fingers around your hips make your breathing grow ragged and uneven. “you need to relax, with me.”

your heart throbs. you throw your arms around his neck, “aki, i wanted to see you all day,” he gasps at your earnest words, pressing you against the tile wall as he rips at your pantyhose, his lips all over your jaw. “don’t tell me that, because tonight we’re taking it slow—right?“ You moan as he works your panties aside anyway, even more so when he swipes your arousal from side to side. “i don’t wanna think, about anything. just you, aki, just you. can you do that?”

“id do anything for you.” he locks your wrists together and pins them above you, keeping them clasped together with one hand. “and now ive got you all to myself for the weekend…you’re all mine and only mine, for now. you don’t need to think about a thing.” his other hand toys with your slick, teasing you until he works his fingers in ways that have you panting and cursing into the steam of the bathroom. “ill make you feel better…so much better.” he groans, feeling the way you clench on his cock, his hands locked with yours. “that’s it, lose yourself. ‘till you’re too full to think of anything else.”

#aki x reader #modern au aki #i just know he’s so thoughtful and understanding #he knows when you’re overwhelmed #I’m projecting bc I’m low-key so socially drained and overwhelmed ahh #i know that aki would feel like a safe space #he smells so good #he’s so soft #his skin #his lips #his hair #I want his husky whimpers #he speaks so softly to you #running his fingers over your spine #calming you #but he fucks you like an animal when you’re stressed #putting you to sleep fr #aki think for me #take care of me pls malewife

[molter-writes]

don't you think it's funny that harwin is like ... physically speaking anyway ... the male version of alicent (younger alicent that is) ... like he's taller than rhaenyra, he has long curly dark hair and brown eyes, his smiles are soft and so are his eyes when he looks at her-

like rhaenyra be so fr you have a TYPE

also i would like to know your thoughts on how alicent feels about their lack in height difference when they're adults coz i think it's endlessly hilarious that she suddenly no longer has the height advantage and i think it infuriates her like "how dare you how dare you become taller than me Rhaenyra Targaryen now i must master the art of looking down at you from an inch below you"

it is very frustrating to be at the perfect shoulder-head-resting level and never be able to rest the head 😡😡😡

#yes but in reality i do think part of what makes rhaenyra attractive to alicent is her power #having a much higher social station and a dragon and also being just personally willing to step over the Invisible Line of Women's Roles #eventually when alicent perceives rhaenyra as using that power to manipulate and lie to her (she thinks) it becomes a font of envy #and not attraction #and rhaenyra growing up to be physically bigger than her even if just slightly is somewhat of a manifestation of that imbalance #but i also think alicent is a stressy messy bottom who wants rhaenyra to hold her very tight and make her feel like she's so utterly safe #that she has permission to calm down and untense #as though rhaenyra's strong suffocating hugs actually give her a little breathing room

[akkpipitphattana]

it really means the world to me to know i’m my nephew’s favorite person

#and i don’t mean in a oh he said i was way cause like he has but he’s also six so he says someone new every week #and sometimes he just wants to annoy his parents or grandma #i mean it in a we were helping my sister and brother in law move today and he cried when there wasn’t a car available #for us to drive from apartment to apartment together #and in a he asked for me to carry him into the house #and in a he hasn’t seen his sister in a while and almost started crying earlier talking about her and i was able to cheer him up #and in a when he’s really throwing a fit i’m the person they ask to come help and calm him down #and i don’t love it purely for the like the pride aspect tho i’m definitely proud of it #but he’s also six and been through way more than he ever should have and i’m so glad that i make him feel safe and loved and listened to #i never want my own kids but if i can be a safe place for the kids in my life that’s all i could ask for #liz rambles

[bakatenshii]

ok not to get more deeplore and i know i just said i wasnt gonna take this seriously oopsies (I’M NOT I PROMISE) but

#baka bants #im a liar im a pussyi only feel safe in the tags still #so here i am in the tags #anyways Ive brainvommed this all to rae already but to be like. bcos this is basically my glorified (extrahorny) diary #i think i was just suffering from fomo and wanting to make sure i was posting when everyone else was because it was so active #and it was the height of all activity and like i didnt wanna miss out on the new wave of the new fandom or WHATEVER #or wanting to constantly be involved in everything/have a head start #and then i was dreading the inevitable deathof tumblr again once quarantine lifted and everyone went on with their lives #(which it did happen obvi) but i guess coming back and seeing that #people are still here? like the fandom still exists albeit the majorit tof people moving on or out of tumblr #and it feels?? like just(???? home??? in a calm chill way like #my friends are still here and even tho its not like a million things happening every day #its calm and chilled and i gues all im teying to say is #i was scared of being left still here when everyone moved on so i moved on first but people r still here so #it makes me feel?? secure #i ??? DOES ANY OF THAT MAKE SENDE #IM JUST EXTRA VULNERABLE ON A WEDNESDAY AFTERNOON I GUESS #BASICALLY WHAT IM SAYING IS SOMETIMES I THINK ABT HOW SAUSAGE PARTY HAS A VERY REAL AND ACTUALLY ACTIVE FANDOM #AND IM NO LONGER WORRIED ABT MY ANIME FANDOM DYING OUT #(but in all actuality like;; the hp fandom and evedy superwholock fandom is still VERY much alive and well) #(so im just being a pussy tbh and emotional for no reason) #(ifbuou have resd this im so sorry for this moaning and being emosh for no reason HAHAHA I LOVE U THANK U FOR PUTTING UP WITH THIS) #EX OH EX OH #!!!! <3333

[m3r0t]

THIS IS BAD

THIS IS SO BAD

gahhh

i legit cannot tell if i am in fact falling in love

or my brain is acting up again

#*crying screaming throwing up* #grr #why am i like this #sorry #idk #vent #vent ish #i think i’m so deeply in love with him but neither of us know yet #lovesick??! #he is just like.. made for me or something idk #he is actually perfect #GOD #and the happiness he gives me #i am so terrified and so excited #WHAT AM I EVEN FEELING AHHH #i want him #i need him #he is so fucking adorable #i wish we could just spend every waking moment talking #the long calls with him are literally my favorite #he does not even know how much every little thing he does makes me so happy #he makes me feel calm and safe #i feel like i am going to get my heart ripped out #and not in a good way #PLEASE LET THIS BE REAL #LET HIM BE REAL #LET US BE REAL #GOSH HDHSJSHSKS

[murobrown]

.

#let me vent here real quick #bachelorette/bachelor parties are one of the most stupid concepts we ever created #it's disgusting and humiliating to me #if I'd have a person who loves me enough that they decide that they want to spend the rest of their life with me it's like an ultimate win #i mean what more do you want to achieve in life? isn't that like a main goal? #I don't even mean marriage that's useless but just that safe warm loving feeling #and then you gather all your friends and you're going to look at it as game over????? #so anyway I should attempt a stupid bachelorette party this weekend and it's useless and incredibly expensive #and it's full of activities that are totally outside of my comfort zone like drinking and dancing and being half naked in a spa #and you have to wear some dumb accessories so that you also humiliate yourself in front of everyone #and first I thought will be able to handle it but yesterday I panicked and asked if I can be excused from all those activities #and people don't understand that my concept of fun is different from theirs #and i don't mean this in any negative way towards those people #it's just different for me and I'd love you to understand that #but... it's also not nice from me to ditch them last minute and let down my friend that's getting married #but yesterday I just had this moment when I thought fuck no I'm going to think about myself for once and it's just not right #because then you make people upset... #the actual wedding is another thing I dread...it will be an actual nightmare and there's no way I will ever escape it #so yeah I'm just full of emotions and I don't know what's the right thing to do and how to keep others happy and myself calm #at least last night I dreamt about Jake Bugg hugging me and if that's not the sign I'm going spend the rest of my life with that man... #i also decided to survive both of those events sober just to make it more challenging for myself #alcohol has way too many calories and i just want stay in control of my brain #i will see if the only three friends i have will resent me after this #i needed to sort my thoughts here even though I know ot doesn't look like so #i hope that you all are having a wonderful day and doing fantastic ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[magicstormfrostfire]

#rain always makes me feel happy and calm and safe #thunderstorms even moreso. #i really wish it was raining right now. #antidepressants are supposed to make you not feel bad #instead im feeling everything and idk what to do with it #my therapist told me that I would start feeling more on them so im not surprised #but i just dream of good things. very good things. #and then wake up and reality is bad #I wish I didnt have to wake up #i miss the dreams i keep having of warm spaces and soft touches and homecooked food #the gentle monotony of being in a safe space with others #the warm pinks and browns and hardwood and swirling soups of sensory #the feeling of things ive never had #of people that have no faces but have loving embraces #the serenity of being with a lover that never has a shape but has everything i want #and then i wake up #and its all gone

[pekodayz]

If I gotta be around some racist transphobe one more time I’m gonna bash my head into a concrete wall until i can no longer see or hear or think of these these stupid ass idiots. I’m so sick of these ppl god

#sorry I have to vent #i defend one thing and they go off on my ass. like kys but if i lunge at u im the bad guy okay now everyone thinks im the crazy one #can they just die like come on I can’t do this by myself #they serve no purpose on this earth they’re gonna be here forever and I’m so sick of it why am i the crazy one when i defend then #they get SO OFFENDED when i call them out and say that what they’re saying is insane. walking hypocrites #I’m gonna go insane i wnat to get out #like what are you???????? god plz die i literally cant bc of law but can u just fuck off forever #i have to hold something and grip it until i calm down but that isnt even working #i do not want to bite anything so im just gonna have to repress it and look insane for the next few hours #im not gonna feel comfortable until i move aren’t I #yeah hahahahahahahahaah omfg i love this world i wish I can buy something rn i wanna watch ososan i don’t feel safe I wanna go to my room

[starbuck]

OH MY GOD I THINK I’M HAVING A TRAUMA RESPONSE

#(this not being a panicked post but rather a moment of realization - please do not worry!) #i’ve been feeling completely crazy for the past week being down on myself like ‘why am i so upset when nothing is wrong????’ #while simultaneously joking every day like ‘isn’t it SO crazy that it was around a year ago that all of my coworkers left me????’ #never once considering that these two things could be connected! #but it seems so obvious now #no WONDER i’m freaked… my body is preparing for nuclear war #i was hanging on all right but then suddenly there were a lot of big changes at once and my system just went ‘oh SHIT!!!!’ #‘it’s THAT again!!!!!!!!’ #and it actually ISN’T!!!! everything is actually cool and fine and under control now!!!!!! #but my trust level is at absolute zero and i cannot perform functional personhood and i feel like a roiling puddle on the ground #that actually makes… so much sense… #i’m gonna talk to my manager tomorrow and explain the situation to her #not that there’s really anything i can do about it but i want to explain myself at least #to hopefully receive a little extra patience and understanding as i work through this #i… did NOT realize that last year’s Situation was so traumatizing but like. Yeah - of course it was #i was in Survival Mode #and i am again now #and i’m just gonna need a little patience and love to help me calm down again and feel safe #that’s it #i can work with that

[oak-and-hurricane]

i had. the simultaneously most stressful day of work ever and also most rewarding. i have been 1 blink away from tears since i got in my car. i'm so glad i'm not going to that school tomorrow. i wish i could only spend all of my time in that school forever.

#LOTS of emotions happening tonight lmao #f.txt #my kids are all so. theyre so fucking elevated all the time im not sure any of them are ever truly feeling calm #i just want them to feel safe and happy and supported #and i don't have nearly as much time to give them as i know they need :(