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morganaspendragonss · 3 years

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The Broken Soul of TK Strand (1/?)

so, that bonus fic i mentioned. i cannot take credit for it - it is a translation of 'la esencia rota de tk strand' by road1985, which in turn was inspired by my fic, 'out, damned spot'

i am so grateful to the original author for not only taking the time to write something based on one of my works, but also for allowing me to discuss the plot with her and translate it into english, especially when i am still learning her language. the only thing of this that is mine is the translation, and i sincerely apologise for any mistakes on this front 💚

ao3 | 3k | hurt tk, worried carlos, rituals, kidnapping, angst and hurt/comfort

The man leaned out from the alley and watched the scene. He had spent so much time preparing, he had carefully chosen the victim from many candidates weeks ago, and now it had all gone to shit because of a cigarette and some curtains embroidered by an old woman for her grandson.

He liked the fire. It was erratic, unpredictable, and powerful, just like his Lord, just as he himself aspired to be.

He watched the flames and longed to get closer, to touch them and know first hand the home of his master. But he still wasn’t prepared; he was missing one more sacrifice, the last one. He just needed one more soul, and then the doorway to hell would be open for him.

But it wasn’t just any soul he needed; he couldn’t choose the first stranger who crossed his path. That would be too easy - his Lord had told him so in dreams. To open the door to hell, he had to find pure souls which were close to the dark side, good souls that had been through horrible experiences and whose pain could be extracted together with their body’s vital liquid.

With each one of the souls he had already extracted, he had improved the ritual a little more. It was becoming cleaner, more discrete, and it seemed that the police still hadn’t found the other three bodies. With luck, he would finish the ritual before that happened.

But because everything couldn’t be perfect, the fire had ruined his plans.

He had spent days researching the people living in that building. All of them had problems, but David Archings was his target. An orphan and divorced, it was said that his parents died because of him, and this had destroyed his marriage even though the police found no proof. Now he lived alone in a small flat where no-one ever visited him.

He was a sad man, consumed by grief, and few would miss him.

But the fire had taken him before he could do anything, and this delayed his plans.

Or not.

Whilst he watched the flames consuming the building, the firefighters arrived. They worked quickly and in a matter of minutes, the fire was under control and almost extinguished.

He hated these people who always destroyed the work of his Lord. Who were they to put out the flames of the kingdom of darkness?

On more than one occasion, he had thought out teaching the firefighters a lesson, showing that that they weren’t and never would be stronger than the power of his master.

But there were always so many of them, always with police involved. For someone who enjoyed going unseen and carrying out assignments quickly, it would be too complicated and too much work to hurt them.

Despite everything, that night, the cards played a very different hand, one which could solve all his problems.

In that first moment, he didn’t know why he noticed the young paramedic, but there had been something about that that caught his attention. He had a special aura, which changed from dark to light and dark again, depending on the moment.

It was easy to focus on him. If men interested him, he would say that he was truly attractive. If he were searching for a pretty face, there was no doubt that the boy had it. He didn’t know him at all, but he could tell that he had a sad smile which hid fear and regrets - exactly the kind of darkness that he wanted and needed.

“TK,” an older man said, one of the firefighters who, judging by the resemblance, was clearly his father. “We couldn’t have done anything even if we had arrived earlier.”

“I know, but I can’t get the idea out of my head that it was my fault we got here late.”

“It could have happened to anyone.” The older man put a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “You are one of the best firefighters I know, and now one of the best paramedics. We all have the right to make mistakes sometimes.”

The man began to see some of the darkness he needed for the ritual, but he needed more.

Another man, a police officer, came closer to the young man and opened his arms. The firefighter buried himself in them and the officer kissed his head. It was obvious that they were a couple; they weren’t hiding that they were together, and there was a great love between them. The officer was worried for the paramedic - it almost seemed like it had been taken from a romantic novel.

“Ty, your father is right. You shouldn’t blame yourself for what happened. Tommy said that the man was dead before you got here.”

“I know, but I always think that it’s not fair, that things could have gone another way.”

The man smiled; the paramedic blamed himself for these two deaths but it was easy to see that he carried more guilt inside him.

“When these things happen, I remember what happened to me. If it hadn’t been for my dad always worrying about me, I wouldn’t be here right now.”

“That’s a thing of the past and, look, thanks to it, you are here. Have you thought about it that way?” The police officer kissed him and they hugged again before leaving.

It was incredible. He had only thought about taking a soul who was close enough to what he needed. But that paramedic who had been a firefighter, that TK, was exactly what he needed. He was a broken soul, an aged vase in danger of shattering into a million pieces. A firefighter, perfect for punishing those meddlers, and, further, in a relationship with a police officer.

But he was surrounded by people and in the middle of a shift; he wouldn’t be able to take him that night. His master had taught him to have patience, so he let him go, taking note of the firefighters’ station number, so he knew where he worked.

The idea that he would have the soul he was sure was the perfect subject excited him greatly. He didn’t want any mistakes or to find him with a perfect family at home, so he decided to wait and do things right.

TK didn’t sleep well that night. They returned to the station after the fire, but he needed time to get to sleep and he woke up many times. When he finally did manage to sleep, he had nightmares about the idea that they could have saved those two strangers.

It wasn’t his fault, not directly at least, but if he had been ready earlier, if he hadn’t forgotten to replace the bandages in the ambulance, they would have arrived on time. Maybe then things would have turned out differently. He couldn’t be sure of course, but the nightmares did nothing but tell him just that.

He got up. Everything was still; with a little bit of luck nothing else would happen and they could finish the shift calmly and go home. But this didn’t make him feel any better, so he made himself a tea - if he had a coffee he wouldn’t be able to sleep a wink - and left the station. There were barely any buildings around it, so there was always a beautiful view of the sky.

A little while ago, they had placed some deck chairs on the small back patio and TK sat on one, with a blanket around his shoulders as it was a cool night. He drank the tea slowly as he watched the stars; they never changed, no matter what happened below. Whether people lived or died, the stars remained unshakeable and, in a certain way, this comforted him.

He liked the idea that there were things that couldn’t be changed, things that always happened in a certain way and, as much as he or anyone tried, it couldn’t change.

He closed his eyes - maybe he would be able to sleep out here, and in the worst case, he would catch a cold and spend a couple of days in bed with Carlos. That didn’t sound bad at all. TK drank the last drop of the tea and tried to relax; he had almost managed it when a noise at his back grabbed his attention.

It sounded like a crack, like branches breaking or something similar. He got up and peered into the darkness but there was no-one there and nothing moved. The sound returned, a little closer; maybe it was a wounded animal or one that was trying to get into the station’s trash in search of food.

“Hello?” TK called, only to feel like an idiot a second later; he already knew that there was no-one there.

He headed towards the trash cans but there was nothing there, and he sighed in relief - he would not have wanted a pissed-off raccoon to throw itself at him. TK turned around, but a dark figure, wearing a large coat or cape that didn’t even show a centimetre of skin, appeared in front of him.

“Who are you?” he asked, taking a step back and throwing two of the dumpsters to the floor.

He received no response other than seeing the gleaming edge of a knife the man had taken from under his clothes as he approached him.

The station lights turned on - throwing the dumpsters had raised the alarm. The stranger turned - he wouldn’t be able to do what he wanted, but before Paul and Judd arrived, he used the knife against him. TK raised his arm in defence and shouted at the sensation of the blade cutting his skin. He stumbled backwards and fell to the floor, but no-one was there save for his friends running towards him.

“TK, are you okay? What happened?”

He looked around him, but the stranger had already managed to disappear. “Where did he go?”

“Who? Hey, that cut looks bad,” Judd said, helping him to his feet.

“There was someone here, he attacked me with a knife.”

Owen and the others arrived a moment later, and searched the station, but found no-one. Judd pushed TK to go back inside so that Tommy could treat his arm.

“It’s not a deep cut, but it has nicked a couple of veins so it looks worse than it is,” his captain said as she finished bandaging his arm. “You said that a hooded stranger did this? It’s possible that you tripped and cut it on glass or a broken bottle.”

“There was someone in front of me, he had a knife.”

“Something tells me that the fire today affected you a lot,” Owen said behind him. “Captain Vega, don’t you think it would be a good idea for him to go home and rest?”

“No! I’m fine, really. That man attacked me and then disappeared.”

But they forced him to go home.

Carlos was waiting for him; he had been asleep but he always left the sound on his phone in case anything happened to TK. Judd had called him and told him what had happened and that TK had been put in a car home.

He met him at the door, barely having time to prepare himself before TK was hugging him.

“I’m not crazy, babe, and the fire didn’t affect me so much that I’m having hallucinations of people attacking me.”

“Shhh, I know. I know you’re not crazy.” Carlos left kisses on TK’s forehead and cheek, and did the same when he took his hands, kissing the palms and the back as he led him to the sofa. “You need to sleep and relax. We’ll talk about it tomorrow.”

“But…”

“But nothing, baby. Sleep, and I’ll stay awake so no-one else tries to hurt you.”

TK wasn’t sure if Carlos believed him or not, but he always felt safe in his arms. He let go and, without bothering to change his clothes, curled up next to Carlos on the sofa. He sighed, feeling his arms surrounding him, and closed his eyes.

They were all right about something - between the last shift and what had happened by the dumpsters, he was exhausted and needed sleep, so it wouldn’t hurt to do it.

When he woke up, Carlos was still awake, reading. By the yawn he gave, it was clear that he had fulfilled his promise and not slept all night.

“Are you feeling better?”

TK looked at his arm, hoping that what had happened the previous night had been a dream. But the bandage was still there.

He nodded. It was stupid to think that someone wanted to hurt him, or that they’d wait around the station until dawn to do it. Maybe it was true, maybe he had had a nightmare about the fire and ended up cutting himself with glass, like Tommy had said.

The kiss to his cheek brought him back to reality.

“Should I make breakfast?”

“We could do it together?” TK offered, but Carlos clicked his tongue and laughed. “Okay, sorry, what I meant is that you make breakfast and I’ll lend a hand.”

“Perfect.” With another kiss to the forehead, Carlos circled his waist and made him get up. He looked happy, with that warm, perfect smile that made TK feel as if nothing could go wrong. “What’s up? Why are you looking at me like that?” Carlos asked.

TK shook his head and the smile returned. His arm didn’t hurt and the fear of the hooded stranger disappeared all at once. He took Carlos’s hand to go to the kitchen and they spent the next hour making a breakfast that, between laughs, games, caresses, and a round of sex on the kitchen island, ended up more on them instead of being eaten.

“Happy anniversary,” Carlos whispered in TK’s ear, feeling the fast beat of his heart.

“Oh, are you serious? We’ve been together for a year today?”

“You forgot, right?”

“Babe, I’m so sorry, I… No, I did forget, but I’ll make it up to you.”

Carlos took off his flour-covered shirt and gave him a quick kiss. “You don’t have to, don’t worry,” he said, before heading to the bathroom.

“Carlos, babe, wait.” TK tugged at him. “Everything’s been so perfect with you. And it’s gone so fast too. When we started dating for real, I didn’t want to give myself hope that we would last and I decided to take it day by day. I was always scared that…”

Carlos took his face in both hands. “I’m not Alex, nor could I ever be Alex.” He never lost his smile; even now that he was hurt, he kept smiling and kissing TK. “And I’m going to be here, with you, forever. I love you, Ty. I love you so much, so I’m going to carry on as if I hadn’t heard anything, and I’ll wait for you at the precinct at six tonight so we can celebrate our anniversary.”

“Okay, though what we just did…”

“That was just the appetiser. Babe, you have no idea what I have prepared for tonight.”

TK worked that shift like normal, though every once in a while, he looked at his arm. He’d convinced himself that it was impossible that someone would have attacked him. Why go to the station to hurt him? Why him? It didn’t make sense.

Luckily, the shift was quiet and it enabled him to rest; they only went on one call and the rest of the day, Tommy and his father both told him to take it easy. But now that he wasn’t thinking about the fire, he couldn’t get out of his head how bad Carlos must be feeling after TK forgot their anniversary.

He had to do something, to somehow make it up to him.

“Can I leave a little early today?” he asked Captain Vega, before telling her everything that had happened.

“Go, buy him something pretty - forgetting the first anniversary is very serious.”

He had studied the area, parking the car somewhere that wouldn’t appear suspicious, but also a place where he could see the soul he lacked.

His blood was perfect; the ritual he had done last night had been a success, and its taste was exquisite. Now all that was left was to take him and prepare him for the final ritual.

He had decided to wait until his shift was over, but there was no doubt that fate was helping him, as he saw him leave two hours early. He got out of the car, seeing him put in his headphones, and raised his hood to avoid the wind.

“Hey, TK!” a voice behind them said, the only thing that hadn’t gone as he expected, the only thing that made him improvise.

He hid the syringe he carried in his jacket pocket and, gripping tightly to the iron bar he’d found nearby, hit his victim in the head.

TK fell to the floor, sounds reverberating around him, barely able to see anything other than white lights.

“He’s already left,” said another voice inside the station.

“I’m… I’m here. Help,” TK breathed, his voice barely there. Even that was painful as he watched the stranger, the same from the previous night, approached him with an iron bar in his hand. “Dad… Judd… Please.”

“For the return of the Great Dark Lord,” said the other man, closing the gap that separated him from TK. He knelt in front of him and placed the iron on his chest. “For the Lord of the Dark to walk the earth, you will give your life, your blood, and your soul. You are the fourth chosen. The fourth cardinal point to mark his return.”

“Please, you’re wrong… I’m not the one you’re looking for.”

“You are. Soon you will see.”

Before TK could say anything else, a second blow to his head left him sprawled on the ground, like a broken toy.

#911 lone star #911 lone star fic #tarlos #tarlos fic #tk strand #carlos reyes #owen strand #tommy vega #judd ryder #911ls #lone star #fanfiction #my fanfiction #writing #my writing

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thorne93 · 4 years

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Inside the Criminal Mind (Part 29)

Prompt: You’re married to Dr. Spencer Reid of the BAU, and are a distinguished doctor yourself on the team. You’re sent down to Miami, Florida for teaching and as a side request from the FBI, to investigate a string of missing persons. When you think you’ve figured out who the unsub is, your life becomes more complicated than you ever could’ve imagined.

Word Count: 3951

Warnings: (throughout the fic –>) death, blood, gore, killings, language, disturbing mental notions, mentions of rapes/murder/etc (You know, Dexter and Criminal Minds related business)

Notes: Thank you so much to @arrow-guy, @carryonmyswansong, and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo - without each of you, I couldn’t have finished, written, or properly navigated this story. Each of you helped me fish out details that were incredibly important to me. Beta’d by @carryonmyswansong and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo… Aesthetic by @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo

This is a crossover of Criminal Minds x Dexter. First time writing Dexter.

Also, the timeline is after Season 1 of Dexter, but during season 14-ish of Criminal minds into Season 15. Enjoy!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So he’s tracking us,” Rossi concluded, sighing.

“That wouldn’t be too hard to do, but why’d he leave the victim’s body for us? That’s a first,” Batista noted.

“Probably didn’t take too kindly to the idea of Olson imitating him,” Debra remarked.

“You think it’s a message to all the possible copycats?” you inquired.

Batisa nodded. “Yeah, I hate to say it, but I think he kind of did us a favor. Take the law into your own hands and the Bay Harbor Boogeyman’s gonna get you.”

You bobbed your head.

“Well, this is the first time we’ve ever been where the unsub has actually been, so let’s get busy,” Rossi ordered.

From there, forensics swept over everything. Dexter was there, taking pictures. There was blood. Rossi had Spencer map out neighborhoods the unsub might live in, he had Luke get with Garcia to check on any connections Olson had.

Once the investigation was done, Spencer told Dexter that you two were coming over. It wasn’t a request, and Spencer barely kept his anger out of his tone. You were worried someone might’ve seen the tense interaction but both men were moving so quickly towards their cars you didn’t even have time to scold them.

Like always, you three got to Dexter’s apartment, and the instant the door shut, Spencer’s frustration was firing at all cylinders.

“I said we needed a plan, that didn’t mean you had to kill him,” Spencer said in Dexter’s face before pacing nervously.

“First of all, I was trying to break in so we could get legitimate evidence on him. Then I found out he’s murdered before. He saw my face, I had to kill him.”

“Or you could’ve still gotten the evidence on him and we could’ve turned him in for the murders! Framing a murderer for other murderers isn’t so bad. Why didn’t you at least tell us where you were? What you were doing? Maybe before you did it? We could’ve at least talked about it--”

"Why didn't you just tell YN about JJ? huh? Maybe it's because you do have feelings for her? While we’re on the topic of not talking to people about things that matter."

Surprised, you glanced at Dexter. You had no idea he’d bring that up ever, let alone right now.

“That has nothing to do with this right now. That’s between me and Y/N,” Spencer tried to coolly dismiss.

You were about to step in, but their conversation was flying so fast, you didn’t even know what to say. To be honest, you were angry with Dexter too.

"That's what it is, isn't it? You were worried if you told Y/N, she'd see through your bullshit and see that you actually do have something to hide about JJ."

"That's not.... That is none of your business," Spencer rebutted once more.

“It became my business when I had to talk your wife down. Last I checked, between the serial killer in the room and her husband, only one of us was there for her emotionally... and it wasn't you." His eyes were dark on your husband and the entire room’s tension made you incredibly uncomfortable.

“Dex, this is hardly the time or place,” you began. “We need to talk about the fact that you went and killed a suspect, instead of consulting us.”

“Consulting you? This isn’t a board meeting for a fortune 500, Y/N! This my life. This is me. This is who I am. These are people I need to protect.”

“So you just killed him? We could’ve framed him! We could’ve talked about it!” Spencer lashed out. “We have people we’re trying to protect too. This isn’t just you, you know.”

“I don’t need anyone’s fucking permission. I’ve been doing this for years, just fine until you came along,” he hissed, pointing at you. “I never should’ve let you in. trusting a fed. What the hell was I thinking?”

“You can’t honestly make this my fault? I’m not the one who killed most of those criminals out there. Your victims were exposed by some scuba divers, not by some slip up I had,” you countered.

“You’re right. It wasn’t your slip up. It was mine. It was mine when I agreed to teach you. I should’ve just trusted my instincts and told you that you were wrong.”

“You wanna turn this around on me? Fine. But we said we’d all be in this together. I told Spencer the truth. He’s being good enough to help us and not turn us in. And you’re repaying us by just going out and doing whatever you damn well please? Everything we discuss gets back to you. I keep you updated on every lead, every shred of evidence. I keep Garica off your tail and I cover your tracks. And you want to turn this around and say that it’s my fault your in deep shit? I’m not the one digging up tapes on my dead parents at work.”

You grabbed your jacket and purse and stormed out, having Spencer follow right behind you. He didn’t say anything, wise to the fact that he needed to let you cool down.

The two of you got back to the hotel and you were spent. This investigation, Dexter, Spencer… you were beyond tired and exhausted.

Spencer sighed as he started to get undressed.

“What’s wrong?” you asked quietly as you began to take your shoes off.

“Nothing, just tired. This is all… it’s a lot, that’s all,” he softly responded.

“I know, and I appreciate it,” you said.

"It's already a lot trying to cover your tracks on this case, but having to fight him every time I go in a room...." He let the tired idea trail off.

Under your breath, you muttered, "Well it's not like he starts it..."

Spencer stopped getting ready for bed as he looked at you. "Are you seriously taking his side?"

"I'm not taking anyone's side. I'm just pointing out that you aren't making it easier. Any time you see him, you make it very clear you don't like him."

"Well I don't, Y/N."

"You act as if you blame him for the reason I started killing."

"Well he is, isn't he?" he questioned, as if it were the only possible answer.

"No, if it wasn't him, it would've been anyone else. Any other vigilante." You sighed.

"That's not how I see it," he confessed.

“I’m sorry if that’s not the way you see it, but it is. It could’ve been any one else,” you informed matter-of-factly.

“I just wish you had come to me first, tell me you were having these feelings, these thoughts. We could’ve gotten you help... “

“Spencer, I don’t want help. I want these people gone and off the streets. No red tape, no year long trials. I just want these scumbags gone, for good. I know you do too, and I know you don’t want me to be the one to do it because of the risk it poses, but it is what it is. I’ve done what I did. I can’t change that.”

“I know, but maybe I could’ve helped you, protected you.”

You took a deep breath. “I know that you think Dexter is a fuck up. I know all you see are about twenty bodies that he didn’t properly dispose of and now we could be caught, but I see a man who has killed way more than twenty people for nearly fifteen years. He’s been stealthy enough to break into homes, abduct people, make people disappear -- all without being caught or suspected of, even from inside a police station. He is good, he is savvy, and he is intelligent. I know you’ve been trained to see criminals as all they are - criminals. But it’s not all black and white, past what Dexter does, he’s a good person. He takes care of Rita and her kids. He worries about Deb. He worried about you when you were taken and he offered to come with me, states away, just so I had a friend because he knew I’d be a mess around JJ. He likes to cook great tasting food, go to the beach, go to barbecues. He isn’t some unfeeling monster that hides in a basement waiting for people to hurt. He’s a good guy, trying to keep Miami safe in a way he was raised to. We were trained to lock them up, he was taught to stop them.”

“It just kills me to see you go through this. I blame him because… if he’d done something different, done it better, we wouldn’t be here.”

You nodded. This made sense. Dexter was the best and only target for Spencer’s feelings. He probably felt betrayed, confused.

“I mean, you went to him, a random unsub to ask him how to do this. You could’ve been killed. I could’ve lost you to this. Instead of coming to me with these feelings, you went to him. If you felt anything like this when I told you about JJ, then I’m sorry.”

You gave a soft half smile, finally understanding where his anger and pain was coming from. It wasn’t so much about what you hid, it was about the fact that you hid it.

“It was. Ultimately, we’ve both betrayed each other. You’re right. Hindsight says I should’ve gone to you. But I think I knew that you’d either just get me a therapist or talk me down from doing this. This was something I wanted to do, and I knew you wouldn’t approve or even entertain the idea, not that I blame you. You shouldn’t. What I did isn’t normal, but I don’t feel bad. I feel the world is a better place from what I did, what we did, together. You kept the thing with JJ from me, and I kept these dark desires from you. I’m sorry for lying, and I’m still sorry for putting you in this travesty of a situation.”

He nodded, looking down.

“I just want us to be us again. I can get past the killing, and I understand why you lied and kept it from me. I just want us to know that going forward, we can be honest with each other,” he said softly.

“Well we’ve faced murder and infidelity, I’m not real sure there’s a whole lot we can’t tell each other,” you teased.

“That’s true. I think any topic is fair game at this point.”

You two gave each other wistful smiles before getting into bed together to face another day of this double agent work.

--------------------------

When you got to the station the next day, Luke and you worked on the report for Olson while Debra helped. They had tons of evidence they wanted to go over and part of you was bursting at the seams to just scream, “Dexter did it! There! Happy? Can we go get lunch now?”

It was mind numbing having to pretend to be this naive about something that you already knew the answer to.

Dexter did minimal work for the blood work. Masuka mainly gathered the physical evidence and Dexter just ran some blood they’d found, but of course both of you knew he’d find no trace amount of anything leading to the killer.

At one point, Dexter caught you outside as you grabbed two cold drinks from a food truck for you and Spencer.

“About last night…” he started and you stood there waiting for the drinks.

“Yes?” you dragged out, waiting for him to finish it.

“I didn’t mean to… This is all still… I’m not used to sharing the steering wheel, alright? I’m used to having one on the steering wheel and my Dark Passenger has the other. But now with you and Spencer in the picture, I’m not used to including anyone on my decisions, ever. I’ve been alone and independent for years, ever since Harry died. Things happened quickly the other night. I was there, he confessed things, and I just… I knew I could use him. I didn’t really have time to call you two.”

“As far as apologies go, that’s the worst I’ve ever heard,” you said with a bit of a smile.

“Come on, don’t make me do this.”

“Don’t make you do what? Dex,” you sighed, rubbing your head. “I didn’t make you train me. It was very clear what my intentions were. I’m pretty sure I even told you you could tell me no and I’d walk away with no hard feelings. But you didn’t do that. Because we both know you’re desperate to have a friend that knows you for who you are. So I don’t appreciate being the bad guy here. I didn’t pick the dump site. None of the things happening now are due to mistakes I made, they’re ones you made. I don’t hold them against you. Shit happened and we're dealing with it. I just want the same courtesy.”

“You’re right, I know,” he acquiesced. “I am sorry. It’s just all the frustration and tension with this god damn case.”

“You’re tellin’ me.”

“Friends?”

“Always.”

You two parted ways, smiling before getting back to your work.

With no new real leads, and the profile very broad and hardly anything to go on except criminal victimology, there wasn’t much else to be done. Dexter left at a reasonable time, and Rossi dismissed Spencer. He still wanted you to finish up the report though, so you didn’t get out until about two hours after they left.

At this point it was an unspoken agreement that every night would be spent at Dexter’s unless he had to spend time with Rita or his sponsor. So, without you there, Spencer and Dexter were together at his apartment.

“What do we do next?” Spencer asked while standing near the kitchenette, Dexter sat in his computer chair.

In a casual voice, Dexter answered, “I’m not sure.”

“I was hoping you had a next step after slaughtering that guy.” The venom in his voice was very thinly veiled. Despite not trying to actively start a fight, Spencer couldn’t keep his contempt for Dexter under wraps.

“Not exactly. It was a spur of the moment thing,” he informed.

“Great. A meticulous serial killer with compulsions. That’s what we need right now,” he sarcastically responded.

“I’ve got to ask, do you hate me because of what I do, or who I am?” Dexter finally asked, anger in his voice.

“What does that even mean?” Spencer fired back, frowning.

“I mean do you hate me because I’m another criminal in your eyes, I should be locked up, and you shouldn’t be helping me. Or do you hate me because I’m your wife’s friend?”

“I hate you because without you, she wouldn’t be in this situation. Without you, without your consent, your teachings, and your existence, she wouldn’t be doing all of this. She wouldn’t be in this horrible position,” he angrily said.

“I keep having to remind you that she came to me.”

“And the word ‘no’ doesn’t exist in your vocabulary?”

“If I had said no she’d have gone to someone else. And would probably be dead right now. Hell I considered killing her. But I listened to what she had to say, instead. Also, she's innocent. Or… was.”

“Am I supposed to thank you?” he asked incredulously, the ferocity in his face and body evident.

“Yeah, a little. I could’ve turned her in to begin with and been rid of her. I could’ve killed her. I could’ve turned on her when the bodies showed up. But I didn’t, because whether you like it or not, and more importantly whether you believe me or not, I give a shit about her.” He took a deep breath. “If she's discovered, so am I, and vice versa. I don't want to see either of us go down for this. So maybe you could stop being a fucking dick to me, and help me save her life?"

“If you cared about her, you never would've put her in this position," Spencer retorted in a low, firm voice.

"If I could fix it for her, I would..."

"You know, she asked me to pretend like I didn't know anything.... if she's.... She begged me to say I didn't know anything about it... maybe you could take the fall for her."

"You want me to take the fall for people I didn't kill? People that aren't part of my victimology? It'll never work. Why would I do that?"

"If you care for her the way you say you do, you'll do this. You'll spare her life. A few victims against your twenty or so is nothing. I'm sure there are some bodies they haven't found, am I right? Just pretend you're taking punishment for the ones they didn't find."

Dexter looked down in thought. It was an idea. He did care for you. In the back of his mind, he’d always prepared for getting caught, but not you. You were just someone who was fed up with seeing good people and animals hurt and you wanted to stop it. Dexter, as he’d been led to believe all his life, felt he was a monster. So if he was arrested and charged for all the killings, it would be punishment fit for the crime.

In a way, he felt it was right to repay you. You’d set him free from Harry. Making him realize that he was a product of Harry, not himself. You’d shown him he wasn’t evil to the core. You’d been his friend, you’d had beers with him, you sat and ate and talked with him as if you two hadn’t just killed someone. Deb and Rita loved him, but they didn’t know him. You knew him and loved him and he didn’t know the first thing about how to repay this. But perhaps doing this, taking the fall, he could do that. He could give you back your life. Give you back your marriage. He could be a good person, for once, even if it was just to you, his very dear friend.

Finally, you arrived at the apartment, bracing for whatever was on the other side of the door.

But you were pleasantly surprised when they were quietly sitting there. “You’ve managed not to kill each other… So what’s our next move? You killed Olson, but now what? The team thinks you did this and we looked into the train car, but now what?”

“I think it’s time we stop waiting for evidence and leads to fall and take action. Steer the investigation instead of it steering us,” Dexter offered.

“What? I don’t know. Where would we even lead it? We don’t have anyone to frame,” you responded.

“Doakes.”

“I know you don’t like him Dex, but that’s too risky. Doakes already suspects you of shit so we can’t do that.”

“Well, what if we didn’t point it at someone, but in general?” Spence suddenly suggested.

“What do you mean?” Dexter asked.

“Well, it’s been known that killers in the past send something to the police or the media once the victims have been found. Zodiac did it. It creates quite the guessing game for people.”

“He’s right,” you agreed, looking at Dex with a knowing look.

“You want me to turn in some kind of serial killer note? No. no way. I'm not going to be a cliche.”

“This isn’t about your image right now. This is about protecting both of you. Some kind of letter addressed to no one will have everyone scrambling. We could make it absolutely arbitrary. It won’t point to anyone in particular. It’ll give the BAU and the Miami PD something to dig over for at least a couple of days. It buys us time,” Spencer implored.

“Yeah, and then what happens when someone realizes it is just something to chase our tail? Debra’s smart. She’ll figure it out, or any person on our team could as well,” you stressed.

“Well, we’ve bought some time then. And it won’t mean anything. It won’t be the first time a unsub has sent in propaganda for the sake of propaganda. It won’t narrow anything down to any one in particular, the teams are no better off than they started, and we’ve bought some time,” Spencer argued.

“Hate to say it, but he’s right,” Dexter said. “I think we should just do a totally typical serial killer note. Point to politics, environment, daddy issues, mommy issues--”

“Profiling is more than just--” Spencer started, but Dexter cut him off.

“I know, but let's say for the sake of the run of the mill serial killer, this note is going to hit everything. It’ll seem like it has one seamless, unified message.”

In seconds, Dexter was hitting up various blogs with different meanings and agendas. Soon, he and Spencer were formulating a well structured essay littered with what appeared to be a higher purpose, but was actually just nonsense. Spence even threw in some literary references. They were sure to include victims names that the press hadn’t released anywhere. They had to be sure this was coming from the real killer or no one would waste their time on it.

When they had quite a bit and Dexter was polishing the opening lines, you pulled Spencer aside, in the living room.

“Thank you, for continually doing this, helping me. I know you could’ve turned me in, or at the very least, just let me deal with it on my own. You'll never know how much it means to me that you’re sticking by my side this entire time,” you said earnestly, holding his hand.

“You’re still my wife, and I still love you. You still love Star Wars, right?” he asked with a bit of a smile.

“Yes.”

“And you still love chocolate chip pancakes, right?”

“Yes.”

“And you were still hell bent on getting me out of prison, right? Still spent day and night either trying to free me or visiting me, right?”

“Yes, but--”

“But nothing. You made a choice that I don’t entirely agree with, you’ve agreed to stop, and now we are doing what we can to protect you. I’m just repaying the favor you gave me.”

“I don’t deserve you. The two events aren’t exactly the same, either.”

“I did something illegal, made choices that hurt us, and endangered my life and career. It’s no different. I’m not here to quantify or qualify what either of us did. Marriage is being there for the mistakes and rough moments. I made a vow, and I’ve never regretted making those vows to you.”

You peered at him with a tender gaze as he did so with you. You were just about to kiss, your lips touching his, but in a swift second, Dexter broke the spell.

“Hey, genius, come read this,” he requested.

Spencer’s jaw set before he walked over. It took him about 10 seconds to read the whole thirty-two page note. “You’ve got three grammatical errors.” Spencer leaned over Dexter and keyed in the corrections. “There. It’s good to be sent in.”

“Newspaper?” Dexter asked.

You and Spencer traded a quick look before nodding and mumbling a verbal confirmation.

“I’ll call it the Manifesto,” Dexter said with a smile.

Spencer rolled his eyes but you smiled back at Dexter.

“Well, good night, Dex,” you said sweetly, placing your hand on his arm before leaving.

As Spencer was walking out, Dexter stopped him and said, “Thanks for helping on this.”

“I’m doing it for Y/N, not you,” he sharply told him, his tone and gaze steely.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tagging:

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#inside the criminal mind #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fic #spencer reid #dexter #dexter fic #dexter morgan

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judgement-free-sideblog · 4 years

Text

Blood, tears and sea breeze.

Hi there! First things first, I want to apologize for the long time that has gone by since an update, I am truly sorry. I would explain, I am a doctor and I work in a rural area, we had a nasty Dengue virus outbreak and we had a lot of patients, so I was buried in job, we had no mortal victims thankfully, but it was insane. Also I get the Dengue myself and it was awful, but I feel better now and everything is going back to normal, here is a new chapter to this story I hope you enjoy it.

Warnings: ANGST, mental health issues, graphic depictions of violence, blood, cursing, mentions of sexual assault, mentions of sex, substance abuse.

Summary: The not so peaceful town of Broadchurch face dead again, while Alec Hardy continues his journey to redemption will this school teacher be the key to solve the mystery or just another victim of the ever watching evilness that seems to reside in the town.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 7: Like a sleepover.

Alec parked his car near the church and cursed himself when he realized his mistake since his presence confirmed to the reporters that something or someone interesting was inside, when he approach the benches he could se Paul who was lecturing a woman with an angry tone that he had never listened before, neither have the old lady in front of him since she looked terrified at him.

"Don't come here acting innocent, the lord knows when your motives are driven by greed and I truly hope whatever you use the money they gave you is worth it, and don't you dare to blame it on your grandchildren since they don't need to have this terrible example from their grandmother" He was obviously restraining from using more harsh language but the anger on his face was enough to make his point clear, and Alec even stop himself from storming in. "Now go away Mrs Campbell, and I hope you would think about your actions when you go out and talk with that people" The woman went out walking rapidly and visibly shaken.

"I was under the deception that priests never get mad" the detective enter the room and Paul gesture relaxed immediately. "Although is rewarding seeing you act out like that"

"Well they do when their congregation sell out each other for money" He said fixing up his clerical collar and regaining composure. "I'm glad you are here, it's madness out there, this town I thought they were better than this"

"Well you choose a profession full of disappointments" Y/N voice came from the altar and she approached now wearing what Hardy asume were donated clothes to big for her making her look like a child, and he brushed away the endearing feeling bursting in him for a second "For what is worth you should be more like that, maybe seeing the personification of the wrath of God in your face would make them listen" She said touching his arm making him smile, a stupid smile in Hardy's opinion. "D. I. Hardy, I was not expecting to see you so soon, but I assume you are not here to tell me I can go home already" She said with a pinch of hope in her voice that was killed the instant Alec look at her.

"No, I'm afraid not, and since you staying here has already been released to the media within four hours you can't longer stay here." He said trying to think what to do next.

"Yeah, and Ellie's ... I mean D.S. Miller's nephew certainly did a number on me didn't he?" She said bitterly, she appear more calmed, and he could see a glimpse of the woman who's thoughts he had spend the morning reading.

"That bloody idiot, he would sell out his own mother for a "good story" and he always think he is doing the police a favor, only making our job more difficult" Alec was angry and his mind was still trying to figure out his next move.

"Well now I'm glad I never dated him." Y/N said trying to lighten up the mood. "I can stay at the Trader's I can pay for that for a couple weeks, I would hate to cause more trouble"

"I don't think you should stay that close to Jonathan's house" Pauld said getting ahead of Hardy "Maybe Beth can take you, just for the night at least" He said and then look at Hardy.

"Sure, I mean if she agrees" He said knowing she will since they had been in a similar situation before.

"Great! If you think you can trust Lizzie's family to murderous psychopath, it'll be just like a sleepover" Y/N said sarcastically making both men feel uncomfortable. "I'm kidding? You guys really need to relax" She said looking at them "Now how am I supposed to get out of here?"

"I may have an idea" Hardy said finally with his expression still as stoic as ever.

Ellie stormed in her sister's house and the young man working o his laptop stood up immediately trying seeking cover behind the kitchen table.

"You bloody bastard!" She screamed at him and she grabbed the closest thing to her

"He hey hey... relax" He said putting his hands in front of him, she throw the ceramic fruit to his head. "Hey you almost hit me!" He screamed when she missed and the pear shattered in pieces.

"What the fuck were you thinking?!" Ellie scream again "Don't you have any decency left since you came back? That poor woman you have signaled as a suspect is not even at the police station anymore you moron."

"What? But you take her in for questioning, and she was covered in blood... and..." Olly realized his mistake and start looking at his aunt with sorrow, he was not about to betray his source but he understood that he had done something wrong "Damn it Ellie I'm sorry, I thought it was legitimate information"

"Well it doesn't matter anymore, once again I'm going to clean up your mess, come by the station we are going to release an official statement about Norbury's death and maybe it will help to clear out this mess" She was being reasonable, more than he can hope for since he was sure she was still pissed.

"And the woman? If she is not at the station where is she?" He jump straight back at the subject annoying Miller.

"Too late for you, didn't you hear? There is a horde of reporters raiding the church to talk to her" She smile at him, happy to see he didn't know, and hoping that Hardy had taken care of that end.

Paul came out of the church and a small figure covered jump in the car with him and he drove past the reporters who immediately try to follow him and some even did on their own vehicles, maybe when they figured he was just going out to get the paper and some groceries with the help of a boy that was being punished for misbehaving at school, would they realized their mistake, and how they didn't pay attention to the pair of people that walked from the back of the church to the Latimer's house.

"So, did you talk to Dr. Florence?" Y/N asked when the garden of the Latimer's was in sight "Oh come on, they can't no longer see us" She urged him when he gave her another of his angry looks.

"I did, but I am not supposed to discuss any of the investigation with you" He said finally.

"Fine, I'm sure she was pleased to see you again" She said and smiled at his puzzled face "I have seen you in her office before, and I overhear the last time you were there, you made a big deal about not wanting to come back"He looked ashamed and open the fence of the backyard to avoid her look "Relax I won't tell anybody, no one will listen anyway, I'm crazy remember? We can still be therapy buddies" She wink at him and enter followed by the baffled detective.

"Oi! I thought she was supposed to escape the press, come inside before any of those idiots will see you" Mark Latimer called them and they hurry inside.

"Mrs. Latimer, I don't know how to thank you"Y/N said once they were inside.

"It's nothing, Chloe's room is clean and free since she is at Uni, you can take it, can you show it to her dear?" Mark nodded and they walk out of the kitchen and Hardy could see her holding on to Lizzie a little more than usual.

"I wouldn't bring her here if I felt she was in any way guilty you know" He said to her and her arms relaxed a little.

"Well you can never be completely sure. But if you trust her we would help you for as long as we can."

"Don't worry, I just need her to have a place for the night we will figure something else tomorrow" He said and a couple minutes later he walked out of the house to get back his car. Ellie had the press release almost done by the time he arrived at the station and the sun was setting on Broadchurch.

"Busy day huh?" She said offering a cup of coffee "Brian is finishing with the house but he said he found something interesting about the cottage, he will tell us later, are you ready for the press."

"I'm fine, I swear Miller this bloody town is fill with idiots, this woman just lost her fiance and they are making all this circus about it" he sit on his chair and let go and exasperated sigh. "Let's get this over with".

It was as simple message, a man have been found dead and the police was investigating several lines of information, they had no idea who had done such monstrosity, and they urged the public to speak up, and no they were not considering the partner of the victim as a suspect, yet the mind of one of the many souls watching said, and turn off the telly, before exiting the room carrying a purple suitcase with the name Jonathan Norbury on it.

Tag list:

@laciesaito

@allonsymexgirl

#broadchurch fanfiction #broadchurch #beth latimer #mark latimer #chloe latimer #paul coates #di hardy #alec hardy imagine #alec hardy fanfiction #alec hardy x ellie miller #alec hardy x reader #alec hardy #ellie miller #ds miller #dc katie harford #katie harford #david tennat

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kidsofcolourhq · 4 years

Text

Zera (16): Feeling Both Liberated and Suffocated by Lockdown.

Something that has surfaced over these weeks in lockdown is an unfamiliar feeling of released tension. At first I thought it was simply because I had more time to care for myself and relax, but then it hit me that I’m no longer feeling as much pressure to constantly navigate my way through both subtle and explicitly racist conversations and remarks, which I am sure is a feeling many people of colour can relate to. I am spending less time having to perfect the balance between choosing to give some of my energy to educate and discuss, without giving away too much of myself to a person or group that simply don’t have the desire or need to truly listen. I am spending less time mediating my tone of voice or censoring my language in order to prevent people from feeling “attacked” (which subsequently sees them stop listening). This is despite me being the one going about my daily life listening to things I don’t agree with, and having to carry the weight of an issue I want to discuss without having the same emotional freedom others do to release my feelings without consequence.

Instead, I am spending more time talking with my sister. It is always a space that I come out of feeling more sure about who I am and what I believe in, which has been a huge factor throughout my life in allowing me to feel able to speak up confidently to my peers and even my authority figures. Through talking about our shared experiences, I feel empowered and I am able to voice my opinions and ideas, whilst knowing that there is power and validity behind what I am saying as a young woman of colour.  

In contrast, despite some feeling of relief, there are also things that have surfaced and become more apparent during this pandemic which have increased my level of frustration and anxiety. Things such as the misleading and dangerous nature of the statement “coronavirus doesn’t discriminate”. The virus may not, but institutions such as health care, education, judiciary and policing certainly do! These societal structures are what reveal the most about our society and they have institutionalised racism to such a degree that it is statistically apparent that people of colour are more likely to be a victim of COVID-19 and the challenges that come along with it. More than 90% of the doctors who have died from COVID-19 are from BAME communities, and socio-economic disadvantages within these communities undoubtedly contribute to the statistics that show BAME communities to be more at risk in general. Knowing this makes me question how so many people are still in denial about racism in the UK, because statistics like this reveal that racism has been reinforced by these institutions long before the outbreak of the virus.  

One thing that I think we are all more exposed to during lockdown is the media, which although I find myself having to limit or filter, has definitely shed light on the treatment of people of colour in the UK and around the world. I wonder whether this is because people have more time to listen and share, and there are no longer the same daily distractions that so often blindside the public. Something that has been challenging to see during lockdown is the violent videos that are being shared, particularly of police brutality and most recently the footage of the murder of Ahmaud Arbery in America. Knowing that justice was only served because of the rapid exposure of the video in the media, and that he was murdered back in February when police had the footage, disgusts and upsets me, and I am sure many other people too. Something that also disturbs me is people’s inability to see that this says just as much (or perhaps more) about the “justice” system and high up decision makers, as it does about the two racist murderers, and that institutions would rather use their power to cover up and therefore reinforce racism than expose and combat it.

For me, this makes me fearful, because I know that for all the people who have raised awareness for Ahmaud, there are equally people who will become more desensitised to this news and some people’s hateful racism will even be fueled by these videos, meaning that racist institutions will continue to be supported and not held accountable.

I hope that more action will be taken by the high up, powerful decision makers to combat institutionalised racism going forward, as there is enough evidence and people willing to talk about their personal experiences of racism to do so (with their support and acknowledgement). I also feel that it is important to recognise our individual power in order to prevent a feeling of hopelessness, and that can simply come through having these kinds of conversations and reaching out to organisations whose aims are to support young people of colour. This can then be supported by those who perhaps don’t relate to these particular experiences through openly listening. I think the main way I personally have found power in my voice is through talking and listening to those who have shared feelings and/or experiences to me and who can offer a sense of unity, as it is extremely easy to feel isolated and unheard as a person of colour in this current climate.

To cope in lockdown, I have found it useful to have set periods of time where I distance myself from media and the news and do something that I enjoy and that relaxes me. Hopefully, after more effort is put into dismantling institutionalised racism from ground level to the ‘top’, young people of colour (such as myself) who are tired of dealing with different forms of racism in their day to day lives will feel less strain and more positive.

www.kidsofcolour.com | @kidsofcolourhq

#COVID19 #Racism #young people #BAME #people of colour #youth #UK #lockdown

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everlarkficexchange · 5 years

Text

The Price Of One's Soul

Written by: @peetaspikelets

Prompt 65: “You did all this for me?” Submitted by anonymous via @katnissdoesnotfollowback

Betaed by: @sponsormusings

Rating: M, for adult themes and coarse language.

A/N: This is the first part of my new story. There will be one or two more parts to come which will feature the prompt. It’s been awhile since I’ve written anything, especially Everlark and I’m so glad I decided to go for it. I’ve really missed these two beautiful souls.

This story was heavily inspired by Mockingjay and Brooklyn 99 because I have no idea what it’s like to work as a police detective.

Summary:

“I’m proud and relieved to say that due to the FBI’s efforts, and Mellark’s outstanding work, Operation Mockingjay was a success and last night the FBI arrested Snow and 16 of his associates with a number of charges longer than my arm.”

Everyone in the room applauds and shouts out in glee. It’s not the most professional reaction you would see in a police station, but knowing Snow has finally been arrested brings an enormous sense of relief to everybody who’s ever come across his brutal handiwork.

Katniss, however, remains silent, her mouth unable to form words. She feels overwhelmed by the news and what Peeta was a part of. Luckily, Finnick looks over and must be able to read her mind as he’s voicing the only questions she wants to be answered right now.

“Does that mean Peet’s back? It’s over? He’s back at the seven five?”

Katniss eyes Haymitch with a wide, hopeful expression. Beside her, she thinks she feels Gale tense up, but she’s too engrossed in what’s happening right now to linger on it. Finally, Haymitch meets her gaze and his lips curl into a small smile they don’t see very often. “The boy is back.”

Really? Are you sure about that Haymitch? *EVIL CACKLE*

Enjoy! Let me know what you think :)

CHAPTER 1

“Everdeen! Hawthorne! Where the hell have you been? The daily briefing started 10 minutes ago.”

“Sorry, Captain,” Katniss replies, dropping her backpack on the dirty floor of the briefing room and taking a seat at the front. “We thought we could get in some shooting practice before work. Instead, Gale spent most of his time flirting with Recruit Officer Undersee.”

“I was not,” Gale huffs, taking the empty chair beside her. “She didn’t know how to hold her gun properly, so I thought I’d be a nice guy and teach her how to grip it correctly.”

“Yeah right,” Katniss answers dryly. “With all the giggling I heard in her booth I bet that’s not the only thing you helped her with.”

“What, are you jealous Everdeen?” Gale asks, shifting in his chair to face her, his eyes glinting with smugness. “Because really you don’t need to be. I could always take you out the back and show you how to grip my –”

“That’s enough!” Captain Abernathy snaps, his voice booming off the rooms yellow stained walls. He looks around the group in annoyance. “It’s like I’m stuck here on a daily basis babysitting a bunch of kids.”

“Aww don’t say that, Dad. You know you love us,” Detective Finnick Odair chimes in from across the room. He starts swinging back on his chair and looks over to Katniss, giving her a cheeky wink.

Katniss rolls her eyes and shrugs her braid off her shoulder. She knows when Finnick gets in this type of mood there’s no point in trying to stop him from riling people up. Even someone as superior as the Captain doesn’t miss out on his juvenile antics. It can be annoying at times, but with the seriousness of the job, she’ll admit there are some days she’s grateful for his jovial character.

“Finnick, be quiet,” Annie hushes beside him.

“It’s okay, sweetheart,” Finnick reassures his girlfriend. “We all know deep down the Captain is like a big cuddly teddy bear. He pretends to act all gruff and indifferent when I know for a fact the other week he gave Effie from Human Resources a big –”

“If one more person speaks out of turn again, they’ll be on desk duty for a month,” Captain Abernathy snaps, interjecting into the conversation. A vein pulses in the middle of his wrinkled forehead for emphasis.

Sighing, Finnick falls silent and tilts his chair forward, so all legs are safely back on the ground. He stares at the front of the room with a pout like he’s a child who’s been scolded by his favorite teacher.

“Now children, eyes to the front, and let’s get back to discussing the Coin murder case.”

Everybody straightens in their chairs, giving him their full attention as he turns on a large television. Katniss stares as a number of photographs pop up on display, showing the latest crime scene the precinct is investigating. She hasn’t seen these before, so she leans forward in her seat to examine the images of the body.

After all her years of working as a police officer and then being promoted to detective, most crime scenes don’t faze her anymore. It’s like she’s been immunized to the absolute horror human beings can inflict upon one another and today, this case is no exception. The female victim got repeatedly shot with a crossbow. It isn’t a pretty sight, but her mind has the ability to compartmentalize.

After a few minutes, Katniss feels bored as she isn’t one of the lead detectives on the case. Instead, she turns her head to where Finnick and Annie are sitting across the aisle from her. Both are great detectives and good friends of hers. They’re also known as the precinct’s most nauseating couple. Katniss can count on multiple hands how many times she’s caught them at work in a compromising position. She’s had more views of Finnick’s bare arse than any other guy she’s dated. Not that there’s been many, as she’s too committed to the job and not a big socialiser. After a 12-hour shift investigating murders, assaults and robberies she never feels the need to get dressed up and go out. She much prefers going home to her small but comfortable apartment, sitting around in her pyjamas, drinking hot chocolate and watching Netflix.

She doesn’t have many friends. When she was a teenager, she lost her beloved sister Prim and her parents in a car bombing, and ever since then she’s had difficulties in learning how to trust and be vulnerable around people. Even now years later, the hurt is still raw, but she knows - thanks to years of therapy - that she can’t live as a hermit for the entirety of her life.

So, over time and working in close proximity with Gale, Finnick and Annie she’s slowly taken baby steps and allowed them to worm their way into her heart. Even if she wanted to run and hide, their tenacity and loyalty have made it impossible for her to leave. They have her back and she has theirs.

Even Captain Abernathy plays an important role in her life. When they were growing up, she and her sister used to call him Uncle Haymitch, as he was good friends with their parents. He was always a permanent fixture at family barbeques and any big social occasion. Like her, he didn’t handle the nature of their deaths well. Where she purposely isolated herself from the world and didn’t eat or speak to anyone for months, Haymitch turned to white liquor for comfort. In the end, it got so bad that he could barely function. Now years - and a few stints in rehab later - he’s proudly sober and continues slaying that demon daily.

There is another person in Katniss’ life. Certainly the most important person. But these days she tries not to think about him too much.

From the moment Detective Peeta Mellark started his first day at the 75th precinct in Panem, he made it impossible for anybody to hate him. When he first stepped out of the elevator with his carefully styled blond hair and shining blue eyes, it was like he’d just come from a GQ photo shoot. His friendliness and charisma soon followed and caught the attention of everybody immediately, especially the women. Katniss tried to hold it against him, as she was wary of people who had that kind of influence, but his detective skills were too damn good to ignore. In the first few weeks of his arrival he helped her bring down Seneca Crane, a cybercriminal mastermind she’d been hunting for 2 years. After that, they’d worked multiple cases together and he quickly rose from being her casual drinking buddy and trivia teammate to her best friend and confidante.

On their shared days off they would often have lunch together at his family’s bakery before Katniss took him to the local park to teach him how to use a bow and arrow. He wasn’t very good, but he was always keen to join her every week. He had a habit of trying to make her laugh in order to throw her off, but it never worked and the day always left a big smile on her face.

But while he may not have been good at archery, one of Peeta’s many talents was baking. A taste of one of his flaky cheese buns always had her moaning out in pleasure. It soon became a weekly ritual for him to bring in an assortment of baked goods for the whole squad to massacre.

Those were the good old days filled with wonderful memories.

And then things changed.

The day Peeta told her he had to go away for a case and he wasn’t sure when he would be back had come as a shock to her. He had become such a permanent fixture in her life that she felt a sudden rush of loss and sadness. The rational side of her understood and knew the job came first, but the whole situation sucked. After they finally managed to say their goodbyes, she watched him walk away with nothing but a box of his belongings in his hands. But before he got into his car he’d paused and turned around to face her. She swore she saw intense longing staring back at her, an emotion she’d never seen from him before, and it had caused her to freeze in place.

As weeks flew by, she continued being haunted by that moment and spent most of her days trying to decipher what it meant. But ultimately, cases piled up on her desk and she soon stopped replaying the moment, coming to the conclusion that it meant nothing.

“Now, O’Dair. Cresta,” Haymitch barks, pulling Katniss out of her thoughts. “How’s your investigation going on John Cato and Rebecca Clove?”

“We don’t have anything solid on them yet, Captain,” Annie answers with disappointment.

“It won’t be long though,” Finnick adds. “They may be cunning, but they’re also overly confident. It’s a bad combination. They’ll slip up eventually.”

Haymitch nods, satisfied. “Hopefully it’s sooner rather than later.”

“According to our informant, they’re supposed to be meeting with their supplier in a couple of weeks. This could finally be our opportunity to arrest all their sorry asses,” Finnick tells him.

“Good. Keep on them for the next couple of weeks. If you need back up call Everdeen and Hawthorne.”

“Aye, Aye, Captain,” Finnick says, giving him a mock salute.

Haymitch groans in annoyance and closes his eyes. His mouth starts moving slightly, giving Katniss the impression he’s trying to keep his anger in check by counting to 10.

“Hey, Everdeen,” Gale whispers.

Katniss looks over and notices his chair is too close to her own. His muscular thigh is now touching hers, and she can feel the heat radiating off him like he’s trying to burn a hole through her pants.

“You feel like getting some breakfast at Sae’s after we wrap up here? My treat,” he adds, his gaze penetrating.

She narrows her eyes and wonders what the hell is going on with him lately. She’s not sure why he’s basically sitting right up against her and she can’t crack the ardent look he’s now giving her. Over the last few months, she’s noticed the increase of social invitations from him, all of which seemed to be on the romantic side. Only last week he invited her out to dinner to the swanky Panem Bistro. Luckily she’d been sick with a cold, so it had been easy to get out of it. But it hadn’t prevented him from stopping by her apartment with a container of soup.

The shooting range they attended earlier this morning was his idea, but as it was work-related, she didn’t see any harm in saying yes. But now the whole situation was getting confusing - one moment it seemed he was asking her out on a date, and the next moment she’s witnessing him flirt with Recruit Officer Undersee. She doesn’t get men - or more specifically, she doesn’t get Gale Hawthorne.

“Now, before I dismiss you I have an announcement to make,” Haymitch says, turning off the screen. Both Katniss and Gale straighten up in their chairs, forgetting their conversation for a moment, taking note of their Captain’s serious tone. She swears there’s now a look of pride etched upon his face as he looks around the room. And she must not be the only one who notices the change, as all voices in the room cease, and look up at him with renewed interest.

“Now, what I am about to tell you we’ve never been able to discuss as the details were highly classified. But as you all know, 18 months ago Detective Mellark left us to be part of an undercover operation with the FBI.”

Katniss’ body freezes. The sound of his name hits her hard.

“What you didn’t know was that Detective Mellark agreed to infiltrate the Capitol Mafia.”

There are surprised gasps all around the room, the loudest coming from Katniss. She knew he was going undercover, but she had no idea who or what it was for. Obviously, he couldn’t tell her anything and she understood that. But the Capitol Mafia?! That was huge. They’re the worst of the worst. Their leader Cornelius Snow is a sadistic bastard, who runs a highly dangerous underground gang who engage in money laundering, murder, kidnapping, drugs, and bribery. He’s known as the most notorious criminal in Panem, and he was good at covering his tracks. Whenever the precinct investigated one of his crimes there was barely any evidence to link him and when a witness did come forward they were always found poisoned with Nightlock days before they could testify in court.

“It was called Operation Mockingjay,” Haymitch continues above the hushed whispers. “It was originally supposed to be a 6-month stint. However, there were…complications and Detective Mellark was forced to stay undercover longer than we would have liked.

Katniss grips the table, her knuckles turning white.

“Does that mean Peet’s back? It’s over? He’s back at the seven five?”

“Yes!” Finnick yells, jumping from his chair and fist bumping the air.

“When can we see him? Where is he?” Katniss bursts out, thankful her mouth is finally cooperating with her brain.

Haymitch pauses for a moment, a flash of hesitation in his eyes before he says. “You’ll find him in my office.”

Before Katniss knows what she’s doing, she’s leaping out of her chair and racing towards Haymitch’s office. She hears Finnick’s loud, hurried feet rushing up behind her.

When Katniss reaches her destination she’s confused for a moment, and wonders if in all the excitement and shock she’s accidentally run into the wrong office. She looks up at the name plaque on the door and knows immediately she’s in the right spot. But sitting on the opposite side of the Captain’s desk with his back to them is a man with broad shoulders and ink black hair. His whole body stiffens at their sudden intrusion before he slowly stands up and turns around to face them.

Katniss’ mouth drops open in shock. After Haymitch’s announcement, she was expecting to find her best friend with his signature grin waiting for her, before running over and wrapping his arms around her in a tight hug. But to her utter disappointment, none of that happens. Instead, the person in front of her looks like a stranger. He has Peeta’s familiar blue eyes, but they’re now etched with harshness and shaded by dark circles. His cheekbones are also sharp and defined like he’s lost some weight and his overall demeanour is wary and guarded.

“You’re back?” Katniss says, her tone coming out more like a question than a statement.

Peeta takes her in silently for a moment. His eyes narrow in quiet contemplation as they travel down from head to toe, mapping her out, trying to become reacquainted. His shoulders relax slightly and he nods his head in acknowledgement. “Katniss.”

His voice is rough and deep like he’s been smoking a pack a day and he makes no other effort towards her. He’s just standing there, staring at her intently and it makes her feel lost.

“Wow, Peeta,” Finnick says, coming up to stand beside her, and taking in his friend’s new hair and dark leather attire. “You’re a brunette now.”

Peeta smirks and runs a hand through his hair, the action making it scruffier. “Yeah, well I thought if I’m going to join the dark side, I may as well put the effort in and go all out.”

Finnick chuckles nervously and leans against the door frame. It’s clear he’s not sure how to take this new Peeta Mellark as well.

“You didn’t join the dark side,” Katniss blurts out before her brain can catch up with her. She doesn’t like the way he’s talking. “You’re a police detective who went undercover to bring down one of the worst criminals in Panem’s history. What you did in the last year and a half was incredibly brave and the operation was a success because of you.”

Peeta looks over to her and shakes his head.

“Peeta, you’re a great detective –”

“Katniss, stop,” Peeta says, raising his hand suddenly, cutting her off. “I don’t want to talk about this now. So don’t go there.”

“It’s okay Peeta,” she continues, ignoring his wish and taking a tentative step towards him like she’s approaching a baby deer. “You’re home and you’re safe. It might take you awhile to forget about Snow, but –”

Peeta suddenly charges towards her, making Katniss freeze mid-sentence. He’s up in her face, looming down at her with a twisted and grotesque snarl. A rush of fear floods her insides.

“Forget, about Snow? Really, Katniss? You say it like it’s so damn easy, but you have no idea,” he spits out. She hears him take a few deep breaths, his eyes still piercing hers, before he transforms his face into a look of indifference. “Has it ever occurred to you that maybe I don’t want to forget? That I don’t want to forget Snow? That I don’t want to forget my time with him?”

His words scare her and suck the breath out of her lungs. His cold, unfamiliar glare awakens her need to run and lock herself in a cupboard like she used to do when she was younger. No matter what she ever said, the old Peeta would never have treated her like this. He’s not her Peeta anymore. She can’t even see a glimpse of the old him. He’s acting like their friendship never existed.

The atmosphere in the room is left cold and uneasy as Peeta takes a few steps back and looks down at the floor. He rubs a hand roughly across his forehead multiple times like he’s in pain or agitated.

“So, ummm…you’re back for good then?” Finnick asks carefully in the soundless space, hoping to break the discomfort.

“For now,” Peeta replies simply, not caring to extend his answer as he leans back against Haymitch’s desk. “So, enough about me. What have I missed around here?”

“Nothing much,” Finnick shrugs. “We got a new vending machine in the break room and the department finally updated our surveillance equipment. I wanted to take the new body cams home to try on Annie, but she wouldn’t let me.”

The corners of Peeta’s mouth curl up. “I’m glad to hear you’re still together. I would have thought by now you’d have fucked things up.”

A look of hurt flashes across Finnick’s face before he puts his signature smile back on. “Nah, man. Annie’s my reason for living. She’s my everything.”

Peeta’s eyes soften slightly at the sentiment and he nods his head. He briefly looks over to Katniss, but before she can meet his eyes, he’s turning back around and giving his attention to the new face standing at the door.

“Hey, Mellark. Good to see you, man,” the familiar voice of Gale rings out as he saunters into the office and stands beside Katniss.

“Gale. Nice to see you,” Peeta replies curtly, his eyes narrowing at his old colleague.

Although back in the day the two never fought and worked well together when they had to, there always seemed to be an underlying tension between them which Katniss never understood. She found it difficult sometimes as they were both her friends, yet if she wanted to hang out with them, she usually had to do it separately.

“I like the look you’ve got going on at the moment. It suits you.”

Katniss and Finnick turn and give each other perplexed looks.

“Thanks,” Peeta answers tightly, his jaw tense and eyes cold.

“Yeah, so you’ll notice some changes around here,” Gale continues, swinging his arm around Katniss’ shoulders, and bringing her in closer to his body.

She grows rigid on the spot, too surprised by the public display of affection to push him away.

“We moved some people around in the bullpen after you left on your…mafia holiday. Katniss is now at your desk next to me, but there’s an empty one near the kitchen you can have –”

“No!” Katniss cuts in and wriggles herself free of Gale’s grasp. “Peeta can have his desk back. It’s fine. I’ll take the spare one.”

“That won’t be necessary,” Peeta replies back gruffly. “I’ve already spoken to the Captain and I’ll be moving a desk down to the records room.”

“The creepy basement where no one ever goes?” Finnick asks surprised.

“Yeah, it’s perfect. Besides, open spaces don’t agree with me anymore.”

As he says this Katniss looks down and notices his left hand is shaking like it’s in spasm.

That’s new.

She watches the action sadly, feeling a sudden rush of warmth towards him, which is unexpected after their disastrous reunion. It’s a vulnerable moment (which the others choose to ignore) and it reminds her of the old Peeta. Yes, their first meeting has gone horribly, but once he gets back into his old routine he will remember who he is again and will be back to the Peeta Mellark they all know and love.

She’s pulled out of her reverie by Peeta who’s picking up a ratty box from the floor. She’s curious to know what’s inside, but he quickly balances the weight against his muscular chest before she can sneak a peek. As he heads towards the door, he stops calmly in front of Katniss and Gale.

“So, I’m assuming you two are together now,” he states evenly, his expression giving nothing away.

Katniss’ eyes widen at his assumption but before she can correct him, he’s already walking past them and calling out unkindly over his shoulder. “Sending you my condolences.”

The words sting and Katniss feels tears start to well in her eyes.

They watch him walk down the stairs to the basement, without even a backwards glance. Finnick turns to her in disbelief, while Gale mutters out, “I always knew he was an asshole,” before stomping out of the office.

Katniss wants to run after both of them. She wants to yell at Gale to find out what’s going on with him. And she wants to shake Peeta so hard that he comes back to himself, but her body won’t move. Instead, she feels exhaustion set in and it keeps her rooted to the spot.

“It will be alright, Kat,” Finnick tells her kindly, putting a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “We all know you and Gale aren’t a couple and never will be. And even if it was true it’s none of Peeta’s business anyway. What he said was really uncalled for.”

Katniss nods her head, refusing to show any emotion. Instead, she says, “Thanks Finnick,” and heads towards the bullpen in a daze.

“He’ll come around,” he calls out behind her. “Just give him some time.”

Quietly, she sits down at her desk, ignoring the worried looks being sent her way and opens her top drawer, pulling out a handful of colored photographs. For years the squad used to display pictures of themselves all around the precinct. Some were from Christmas parties, training days, or simply goofing around with each other in between cases. When Peeta went undercover, Haymitch made her take down all the photos that featured him, in order to protect his cover. And they’ve laid in her drawer safe and sound ever since.

She stares sadly at the bundle in front of her, each colored memory seeming like a lifetime ago. In every photo, Peeta is either making a funny face or staring at the camera with an easy-going smile. She wonders when she’ll see it again and then a painful thought occurs to her.

What if they’re wrong? What if he never comes around?

A single tear falls quietly down her cheek. What if Peeta Mellark is lost to her forever?

#Springtime Edition 2019 #submission #peetaspikelets #prompt 65

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deviantruse · 6 years

Text

to be human | i.

pairing: connor x reader x ???

genre: angst, post revolution au, fluff, mystery, multimedia inclusive

warnings: language, substance use, mentions of mental illness, people just be going thru stuff man that’s all

word count: 1.5k (1, 550)

parts: one - two - three - four -

a/n: hi! this is my first fanfic in a long while, so pls be nice ty <3

_________

“I feel, doctor.”

Farah’s hands shift slightly, then still again on her lap. She has none of the human kinks, the constant fidgeting, the stammering, the sweating, the heavy breathing. She sits still, in perfect design, but her expression betrays all. She looks troubled, she says she feels.

“You feel what exactly, Farah?” You question gently, dominant hand moving slowly across paper as you alternate between glancing at the android and back at your notes. There are a hundred more reliable ways you could take down and store session notes, but you prefer to write them. It’s something you’ve always liked, no grand sentiment behind it, writing keeps you engaged. And doesn’t hurt as bad as looking at a screen for hours on end.

“I feel confused. I’m unsure of what I must do next, I feel as though I shouldn’t be feeling at all. My creators, they gave me life, gave me intelligence and power. My former purpose was to serve a human master, to ensure their lives ran smoothly. Gaining rights, gaining freedom, it means I must have a new purpose. But what is it?”

“I cannot answer that for you, Farah,” you tilt your head slightly as you smile, “in fact, most humans find themselves struggling to answer that question. Finding true purpose, it is something widely discussed amongst philosophers. Why do you feel you must have one?”

“Markus,” she replies, volume barely audible, “he fought so hard, lost so much to ensure my people would be treated as living beings. He gave up plenty because he wanted us to be free, to be acknowledged as alive. I was designed to be a caretaker, to handle household tasks, to look after children. Now that I know I can be more, it pegs the question of: what should I be? What am I trying to become, now that there is potential?”

You take a moment to marvel at how eerily similar deviancy is to mankind’s deep-rooted existential crisis. When machines are given a conscience, allowed to feel and have free will, when they are recognized as alive, they too fall victim to the question of life, of what it all means, what you’re here for. The question of what role you play in the large scheme of things, of what you contribute to the timeline of the universe.

If you allow something to live, it begins to question why, how, what for, how long.

“Hm, those are interesting questions. They require a lot of thought too, so I understand why they trouble you. I suggest we start simple.” You glance down at the android’s file, searching for the relevant details pertaining to her case. “You previously served Mr. Matthew Oswald, a married businessman with two daughters. How did you like it?”

“It was ideal,” Farah almost sighs, “they treated me well, like I was one of their own. The daughters, Livvy and Indigo, they were such bright, kind little girls. They loved children’s stories, hot pockets and cold chocolate milk. They did their homework when asked to, cleaned up after themselves when possible, and told me -” The android stops abruptly, lowering her head. “-told me I was their best friend.”

“It seems like you were content with the life you had prior to the revolution.” You ensure your tone is as neutral as possible. “Do you think, perhaps, your internal conflict comes from the guilt that you feel for having the life that you did?”

“Yes. So many of my people were being abused, overworked, exploited and considered inferior, yet I lived in my own bubble of ignorant bliss.”

“Markus started off that way too, Farah.” You reassure, “He served Carl Manfred, one of Detroit’s most renowned painters. He considered Carl a loving father instead of a master. He was well taken care of, encouraged to be independent and grow into his own. It wasn't just you, Farah. The leader of the revolution himself had to step out of his bubble to truly see the world around him.”

You see the indicator turn yellow, light spinning quickly before it settles back into the default bright blue. “He had a good life?”

“At home, yes. But he was constantly harassed when out in public. People would call him all kinds of names, rough him up as much as possible before the police intervened. He couldn't even step out to get some paint without risking some kind of damage. His life at home was ideal, but every single day, when he left home, he faced some form of hatred.”

Farah’s expression falls at this. “Humans would call me names too.” Her indicator turns red as she continues. “Every single day, at the park I took Livvy to, at the grocery, at the mall, they’d tell me I was nothing but plastic, a machine parading around as a human.”

Your heart burns as you register the heavy sadness that falls upon Farah. Her indicator stays red as she begins to sniffle, and you for a single moment remember your old life, the person you used to be, the damage you contributed to.

And the guilt burns even hotter than sympathy.

“I’m sorry that happened to you,” you finally say, hoping she hears your sincerity, “humans have always had the tendency to fear and put down what they secretly believe to be superior to them. It’s one flaw my kind struggles to work on. It should have never affected you, should have never hurt you, so I’m sorry.”

“Thank you.” Her voice is soft as her indicator turns blue. “I know you are kind. I know you stand with my people, stand to protect us and our rights. I know you don’t hate us.”

I never could.

“Of course, Farah. You are alive. So you deserve to live the way you choose. That’s all there is to it.”

_________

Connor will never admit it to Hank, but he prefers to avoid Ferndale station altogether.

As he walks beside the Lieutenant, he struggles to keep his expression neutral, eyes instinctively following the symbols on the graffiti, a remnant of Jericho, a reminder of what gave him the right to freely enjoy something so trivial to humans, something they deem insignificant.

An aimless wander.

He tries to look away, tries to direct his attention elsewhere, but it’s a futile attempt. As they walk past several, old, worn down buildings, Connor finds himself searching for them, unable to overwrite the program currently overwhelming him. It hurts him, knowing the last time he went looking for those symbols, he was doing so as CyberLife’s puppet, Amanda slyly pulling all the strings. It hurts him to acknowledge that the ship would still lie freely on sea, damaged but a safe haven, had it not been for him and his mission.

Deviancy has given him much to appreciate, but it’s also doubled the skeletons in his closet.

“Hey, what do ya’ keep lookin’ at?” Hank stops abruptly, following Connor’s gaze and frowning in confusion. “Is there something that I’m not seeing, Connor?”

“No, Hank,” comes the late, soft reply, “nothing significant.”

“Well it seems significant to you.” The older man meets Connor’s eyes and smoothens his tone as he says, “Feelings fucking suck, Connor, I get that. But you gotta talk about them if they’re making things difficult.”

“I don’t know what it is I feel.” Connor shakes his head, fighting the urge to glance at the symbol once again. “I’m still adjusting, so there’s a lot that’s new to me still. I’ll adapt though. I always do.”

Hank nods, understanding it would be unwise to push the android to talk. “The adapting process doesn’t have to be shitty, though. I’m meeting my shrink next week, Tuesday afternoon. If you want to, you can too. Whaddya say?”

Multiple boxes of text stumble into his frame of mind, his mind palace filled with pros and cons of accepting Hank’s offer. On one hand, it would be a great show of support, considering it had taken a while for the Lieutenant himself to agree to see a professional. It would ensure Hank attended his sessions regularly, and it wouldn’t be as difficult in comparison to going alone. On the flip side, it meant Connor had to acknowledge his own skeletons, the ones he fights so hard to forget, to erase from memory. It would mean acknowledging a lot of which he’d prefer to abandon and never pay mind too.

“Connor? You don’t have to, it’s just a suggestion, son.”

“I accept.” He says finally, managing a small smile. “I’ll do it. Same time, different doctor.”

Hank tries to fight it, but Connor can spot the relief flooding into his eyes. His shoulders relax as he exhales, laughing slightly and patting Connor’s shoulder. “Alright, it’s settled then. We’re going to be airing our dirtiest laundry to some psychologists. Fuck, what have we come to?”

“I don’t know, Hank.” The android’s smile widens. “But I believe this is healthy. Better than some scotch and that death burger you love so much.”

“Don’t you dare fucking come for my burgers, you prick. I’m here for a good time, not a long time!”

“Your life expectancy confirms that to a terrifying degree, Hank.”

“Don’t make me swing at you, asshole. Keep fuckin’ movin’.”

_________

i promise future chapters will be longer! this is just to set the scene, of how life is generally. you’ll be seeing what Markus and Kara are up to soon :)

and of course, feedback is always appreciated <3

#the most satisfying part of this was the Connor x reader x ??? part #like who is ???#there's a LOT COMIN FOLKS #:D #detroit: become human #detroit become human #dbh #connor x reader #rk800 x reader #dbh connor #dbh hank #detroit become human fic #post revolution au #detroit: connor #detroit: markus #detroit: kara

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infosecwomen · 7 years

Text

Increasing Safety and Inclusiveness at Hacker Cons

This roadmap for addressing the problems which soured this September in Louisville is a collaborative work by numerous women… many who attended DerbyCon Legacy (some have attended every single year), others who came but left early, some who stayed away entirely because of the news of what was happening, and additional women who have previously vowed to not attend such events at all unless some of the deep-rooted problems in Infosec (which are not unique to any one specific event) can be addressed by conference leadership.

We appreciate the fact that Dave Kennedy, Martin Bos, and many of the volunteers from DerbyCon have engaged the public in a dialog regarding how to best provide for the safety and well-being of hacker con attendees in the future. It is wonderful, their willingness to take steps in a positive direction, and we accept their invitation for open discussion.

There are three steps we see DerbyCon proceeding through in the process of repairing their public image and improving safety for women at conferences. They are outlined here…

[= I. Adopt and Publicly-Post a Code of Conduct =]

Even though a small contingent of people have resisted this in the past, DerbyCon has made significant progress in this area recently. That’s wonderful. A Code of Conduct protects a conference as much as it protects the attendees. Many prominent speakers and sponsors won’t participate at events without one, and even the smallest and most far-flung of hacker cons have been adding them to their web sites and programs.

A Code of Conduct doesn’t have to be long, full of legalese, or kill the “friendly” feeling of an event. It really only has to do four simple things:

State that the event wants to be a welcoming and safe place for all attendees (DerbyCon already says this and has been telling the community that for years now)

Explain what behaviors are not tolerated (this, unfortunately, is where DerbyCon fails to be adequately specific)

Explain how people should report problems (DerbyCon, like many events, encourages people to “contact staff” but the preferred language would include an email address or other contact information that is monitored 24/7 during the con. (If someone is holed up in his or her room because of threats, they shouldn’t have to venture downstairs looking for a red shirt or scroll through Google results trying to find the right Security contact)

A commitment to enforce these rules. (DerbyCon claims to stand for the security of all attendees, but unfortunately we have seen that there have been some stumbles in the past when it comes to follow-up on problems)

DerbyCon can solve point #2 & point #3 with the addition of honestly just one or two lines of text.

At least one hacker con has summarized their Code of Conduct as, “If you are a jerk, we’ll ask you to leave." Examples of being a jerk include harassing, forcing unwanted interactions, or secretly replacing someone’s coffee with Folgers crystals.” Humor can be just fine here! (As long as the two most critical points of “don’t harass others” and “don’t force yourself upon others” are spelled out.)

The “contact” information can truly be an email like [email protected] as long as it’s being monitored throughout the whole event. DM-ing the conference Twitter can work but that requires open DMs (which not all Twitter clients support well) and forces a staffer to sift through a lot of messages, many of which will be just noise.

[= II. Sunlight as Disinfectant =]

This may be the hardest pill to swallow. Right now, we are not aware of any public-facing resolution or closure on these matters aside from Dave and Martin tweeting that things are going to get much better in the future. That alone will not mollify those with concerns nor will it make women want to start attending/proposing in record numbers.

There were two separate major incidents this year, and they were deeply inter-related. DerbyCon would be wise to make blog two posts on their site in which they discuss them frankly and offer clear public apologies for any ways in which they feel they didn’t live up to their full stated hopes of being a con for everybody in the hacker family:

Failure to condemn and expel harassers

While the mishandling of the matter relating to a trainer with a restraining order due to domestic abuse was deeply troubling, harassment is actually the wider matter at DerbyCon, and the issue that keeps women away so much. Given no Code of Conduct prohibiting harassment, a small but vocal group of angry voices targets their rage at people in an attempt to either make them stay away from DerbyCon or not enjoy DerbyCon if they attend. This angry group (to varying degrees) has at times included both staff as well as the general attendee public. While folk such as the former security staffer and his posse of associates represent the worst of it, plenty of things that the conference videographer has stated online cross the line into harassment, as well. Even one of the conference founders, generally a kind person, has threatened physical violence against people and profanely told women to be silent when they have criticized DerbyCon online.

This is a topic where DerbyCon has to dedicate extra care during the repair of its reputation, since it became public during the con this year that most of the hatred and abuse is generated within a Facebook group calling itself the “illmob” (a group apparently started and overseen by the fired security staffer) which includes the DerbyCon founders and several other conference staff as fellow members.

NOTE - This is not to suggest in any way that said Facebook group’s sole purpose is to harass women, but simply to point out that the creation of the harassing tweets, image memes, apparel, etc takes place here in full view of the DerbyCon conference staff. They cannot claim ignorance regarding the identity of the people behind the harassment.

The mishandling of reports of an alleged abuser of women

This is more delicate, and a private matter, but DerbyCon can speak to the problem respectfully and in a way that tells the public (a) what went wrong and (b) what they will do differently in future.

The earlier blog post, about the harassment issue, is harder to put into words but it would be good if it (1) acknowledges that attendees have been subject to online harassment in the past, (2) explicitly states that this is not what DerbyCon is about and that this is not OK, (3) apologizes for any statements made in the heat of the moment by the DerbyCon team which could be construed as harassment, and (4) includes a commitment to prevent this behavior in the future… a promise that staff will be professional and a promise to eject or bar attendees who harass others.

[= III. The Ramifications =]

So here’s where the rubber really meets the road.

Actions speak louder than words.

If DerbyCon is going to be taken seriously, and to satisfy Point #4 regarding a Code of Conduct as mentioned above, they must demonstrate their genuine commitment to:

standing by their updated Code of Conduct

handling reports of abuse/safety risks/etc properly.

DerbyCon has stated that they’ve “never banned anyone” and described how they feel that the community has failed if things get to that point. This is not so. It fails the community to have rules and policies but never actually follow through on them.

As hard as it will be for them:

* Will Genovese represents the most clear-cut violation of a Code of Conduct that anyone has ever seen. He has repeatedly harassed numerous people over the years (and reserves the bulk of his ire for women and their supporters) and this year went so far as to put DerbyCon at actual legal risk by harassing attendees and abuse victims while speaking on behalf of the conference itself. Even after he was fired he continued to harass attendees (and non-attendees who simply spoke about DerbyCon) online and at the conference. The DerbyCon Code of Conduct carries basically no weight if people who behave in this manner are allowed to attend. There are others who have said hateful or harassing things to a lesser degree… but Will has taken it to the point of publicly posting both text and images that do nothing but sow hate and discontent at DerbyCon. For the community (particularly women) to take even slightly seriously the notion that DerbyCon is trying to improve, Will would not be invited back to DerbyCon nor welcomed as an attendee.

* the individual subject to police investigations, an Order of Protection, and court filings for abuse would not be invited back to DerbyCon as a trainer nor welcomed back as an attendee. The fact that he was subject to an Order of Protection backed up by a report of physical violence should have been enough there (and Martin Bos claimed back on August 30th that an O.o.P. was more than enough reason to ban him) We are not talking about an Administrative Non-Contact Order (which basically anyone can get on anyone else for almost any reason) but an Order of Protection based on police-documented abuse. Once the police (not just courts, but the police) are taking things seriously, come on… that’s a person you don’t want at your conference.

* Bryce Case Jr. (a.k.a. YT Cracker) would not be invited to DerbyCon as an artist nor welcomed as an attendee. Again, this is someone with a long history of security violations and drunken abuse of women at other conferences. There are records of all this. It is unclear if the /courts/ were ever involved, so this individual represents a different standard of evidence… but he unmistakably is a known bad actor and if DerbyCon can’t bring themselves to prevent his attendance, it is a signal to the community (especially women) that DerbyCon is not a place where people are safe.

* The DerbyCon videographer is the hardest case here. He has engaged online in what is seen by many as harassment. It has seldom been /directed/ at anyone, however. Instead, his comments are broad and focused against women and their supporters as opposed to calling out a specific person here or there. Also, as his defenders have pointed out, some of this has become more managed in recent months. Our willingness to give him space to reform has nothing to do with his tireless work on video recording… there is no ‘hours of volunteer work / hateful behavior forgiveness’ exchange rate system. We are not without understanding; he could remain part of DerbyCon (where he is cared about by many individuals who are trying to help him improve himself) in a Volunteer role as opposed to being on Staff and this might placate the majority of the community. But there will always be a number of women who will not feel safe attending any conference or event where he is present as anything other than an attendee. (This is why BSides events sadly had to take the difficult steps that they did and remove him.) It is hoped that his behavior continues to improve and that DerbyCon will never have to bar him outright.

It is interesting that in the case of the trainer and the music artist, they aren’t actually in direct violation of the Code of Conduct, because nearly all of their misdeeds took place off-site and at other events. But barring them from future attendance is of course part of a greater safety management process… which needs to be addressed by internal policy: How do you decide that someone is a safety violation to your attendees? How is this researched? What counts as evidence? With whom does the final decision rest? All of this needs to be written down somewhere. Not necessarily posted publicly, but written down and made available in cases where parties request to see it. This is very important for DerbyCon to legally cover their butts and it’s astonishing if some policy like this doesn’t already exist.)

If DerbyCon makes good on these three key areas – a more fully-realized Code of Conduct, public posts describing the difficulties and apologizing to the community, and finally breaking with tradition by actually officially barring certain known bad actors from attending in the future – then this would be considered a welcome (and really big) step in the right direction for the conference. And for the hacker community at large.

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storylikethewind · 7 years

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Canada Day and Canadian Exceptionalism

(It’s not quite Canada day here yet but i’m not sure if I’ll be on tomorrow and i’ve been having some comprehensibility issues so i want to type this while i can make some knd of sense). There’s also not actually a lot of in-depth information here. My brain is kind of fuzzed and all over the place.But i wanted to get it out just in case so this is just another reminder that Canada is a colonial settler state. It is stolen land, much of it still unceded land, meaning that the first nations peoples never officially signed over anything and it was taken by force, and by rights indigenous people should still control what goes on there. The Canadian (and previously British) government that colonized it is guilty of the genocide and continuing oppression of and violence against First Nations, Metis, and Inuit/Circumpolar peoples. Besides straight genocide, Canada and the RCMP have established residential schools and trends like the “”sixties scoop”” to attempt to strip indigenous peoples of their identity and erase languages (they were also hotbeds of abuse). Native communities experience unforgivably high rates of poverty, addiction, suicide, and environmental violence (particularly in water quality) due to systemic racism and federal and civilian indifference. Nothern communities are heavily exploited-Canada seems willing to violate the land with pipelines, fracking, and other destructive measures but thinks seals are a cute enough part of nature to warrant unnecessary protections, at the expense of Inuit lives. Today indigenous people are still fighting for reparations, the return and proper treatment of their land and sacred saces, and the reformation of the (shitshow) “Indian Act” (particularly in regards to injustices against native women and those of ‘uncertain parentage’), among many other issues. Violence against indigenous women is so epidemic and police/non-native indifference so deeply entrenched that even though they make up only 3% of the population, they make up 10% of female victims of homicide, and are at an extremely increased risk to be victims of other violent crimes and sexual violence. A national enquirey is still on going and many indigenous people and groups have been expressing frustration because the governemnt still isn’t listening to them on this issue (among MANY, obviously).

[Here is a google doc (still getting updated, from the looks of it) of indigenous organisations to donate to. I’m going to try to get more specific links in here later, but I need to organize all my bookmarks. Look at the Highway of Tears site for just a small example of the vast MMIW issue and the National Indigenous Women’s Resource Center for a wider view. Alethea Arnaquq-Baril’s film Angry Inuk is focused on the cultural prejudice and systemic violence inherent in anti-sealing, but also touches on a lot of the issues faced by Inuit in Canada (its also just a great movie and everyone should watch it)

Unsettling Canada 150 is a specific call to action and fantastic breakdown of why the 150th is nothing to celebrate, and is based on activist Arthur Manuel’s book Unsettling Canada: A National Wake Up Call. It includes written resources, videos, samples of the book, and specific organized actions on July 1st.]

Canada was also a slave-owning, slave-trading state and many places in Canada were built on the backs of slaves, and anti-Black violence is endemic in Canada. The famous McGill University was named after a slave-owner. Canada has seen the same systemic injustice and violence for Black people in its prison systems, its schools, its historical erasure. Desmond Cole talks about it in his documentary The Skin We’re In and Charmaine Nelson talks here about how erasure works in Canadain education under a veneer of “inclusivity” that dominates Canada’s international image. (An example: going to uni in Nova Scotia, I learned about Africville, a Black community in Halifax that the city tore down and forced everyone out of. It became a focal point of a powerful cultural/political movement among Black Canadians, especially on the east coast. But schools almost never mention it, and even for life-long, non-Black residents of the province, they had almost never heard of it until then). Canada also has entrenched Islamophobia and xenophobia. We, like the US, interred Japanese and Japanese-descended residents and passed laws against so-called “Barbaric Cultural Practices”. We continue to detain immigrants and refugees and have plenty of white supremacist groups and hate groups in our borders. (Read Sarah Adjekum’s article on “The Myth of Canadian Exceptionalism” for a good overview of a number of issues).

We’ve had eugenics and the forced sterilization of the mentally ill, and those with mental disabilities in particular still face stigmatization and difficulty getting treatment (I went off my meds living in Canada because even though I had healthcare, it didn’t cover my psychiatrist or pills, and it lead to several psychotic breaks. I know that’s anecdotal but the point is Univeral healthcare isn’t always).

Despite Trudeau frequently using pride as a photo-op, LGBTQIA+ groups still suffer prejudice and violence, particularly where they intersect with race (violence against two-spirit people is often included in the MMIW discussions), and transgender Canadians still face a huge uphill battle and transphobia in the medical community. “Universal Health Care is the best” is not a good enough answer when so many important things are still out of reach.

This is all really basic stuff but I think thats the problem--lots of Canadians still dont know it or, more likely, don’t want to think about it when they could be feeling smug and superior to the US. American exceptionalism is ridiculous because its so unwarranted, but I think Canadian exceptionalism is even more dangerous because the country has such good PR, so no one outside thinks there’s a problem. And inside, lots of Canadians (especially white, and straight, upper-class, English-speaking, neurotypical/non-disabled etc.) don’t want to admit it. The idea that Canada is a good country for everyone is insidious and wrong and claiming it is further endangers and erases all the people who suffer. Being ‘better than America’ in terms of colonialism and violence is such a low bar its near meaningless. We need to be much better, period, and we need to listen to all the people calling for justice instead of ignoring them because they don’t fit Canada’s friendly, peaceful branding.

Sorry this isn’t very well organized let me know if the links dont work or if something should be added/removed

#canada #canada 150 #canadian exceptionalism #canadian colonialism #im sorry this is such a mess #im having a disordered thinking night at the worst time #warning: written by a tired schizophrenic

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loudlytransparenttrash · 7 years

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This Week Within Our Colleges

A female student’s nomination for director of student safety at Tulane University has been rejected because she called anti-Trump protesters ‘toddlers’ and denounced safe spaces in a Facebook post. One of her critics stated, “I don’t think someone is qualified for this position if they don’t value how I feel and my opinions as a student of color.”

Donna Hylton, feminism’s hero and icon who spoke to her adoring fans at the recent Women’s March is also a woman who spent 27 years in prison for kidnapping a 62-year-old man, starving him, torturing him and forcibly sodomizing him with a 3-foot steel pole before eventually killing him. She was paid to be a guest speaker at Manhattanville College to talk about how dangerous Donald Trump is and the impact of the fear resulting from the vulnerability to being deported because she understands what it feels like to be a victim and a mere prisoner. When a student asked why she refused to mention the crimes which lead to her incarceration, the student was shut down and told not to embarrass the murderer.

Graduate student-teachers at Yale University have launched a hunger strike to demand that the school recognize their newly-formed union and negotiate a contract with it. Here’s the funny part - they have promised to substitute strikers as soon as they’re hungry or aren’t feeling well. Kind of making a mockery of real hunger strikes for real causes.

A gigantic, colorful-haired trans “woman” in a denim vest began destroying a Trump sign and then turned her rage onto a little guy who made the huge mistake of mistaking her for a beastly man during a UC barbecue. When asked why she had vandalized the Trump sign, she responded by indicating that she doesn’t “believe in property.”

Robots are just as racist and sexist as humans, according to a recent study conducted at Princeton University that uncovered gender and racial bias in an Artificial Intelligence machine. According to the researchers, robots have always exhibited racist and sexist word associations, such as connecting women with families and households but not professionalism or careers.

A geology professor at Pomona College says she will prioritize non-white students, immigrants and low-income students for enrollment in a class. Unlike most Pomona classes, the course is offered on a permission-only basis. It was put in place simply to ensure that students majoring in a particular field of study are able to enroll in courses for their major ahead of others who take them to fulfill requirements. Linda Reinen, however, plans to use her approval authority to prefer students who aren’t white and aren’t from stable homes.

University of Wisconsin-La Crosse students have protested the cancellation of a Hmong “language-heritage” course, calling the move “racist” despite historically abysmal enrollment. Students gathered to protest against the school, carrying banners that asserted “white supremacy is alive” and “UWLAX is racist."

A coalition of leftist groups at Harvard University spread hundreds of fraudulent letters across campus telling students their dorm mates had been “detained indefinitely” by the school’s Special Investigations Unit. On the reverse side, the flyer revealed that “this is not a real notice,” but expressed hope that “the unsettling nature of this notice allows Harvard community members to reflect on the reality of people who face these kinds of unwarranted disruptions of life,” and continued to list "facts” regarding blacks and Latinos being pulled over and shot by police and Israel’s supposed crimes against Palestinians.

Students at Pomona College have published a letter demanding that administrators rescind their offer to hire Sociology Professor Alice Goffman because she’s white. The letter complains that the Sociology Department has not hired enough faculty of color to match the increased proportion of minority students. The collective of “Sociology students, alumni, and allies” open their letter by expressing their “anger” and “concern” regarding Goffman’s hire, calling it a “failure” to address the lack of professors of color on campus. They argue that because the majority (56.7 percent) of students in the Sociology department are now people of color, it is problematic for the department to continue hiring white people.

A Macalester College student organization referring to itself as “Stop White Noise” recently held a moment of silence to protest “the centrality of whiteness and Eurocentrism on campus.” “The intent of this action is to raise awareness of the space whiteness takes up in our classrooms and curriculum,” a website created for the organization explains. Initially, the protesters had intended to require only “white students and professors” to be silent, but ultimately decided against that approach because it would “put undue pressure on students of color” who “may be the only PoC” in class.” lol

Students at Hood College want a temporary display put up by the College Republicans chapter to be taken down early because they feel "threatened" by some of the "hateful" quotes from conservatives. The school's president issued a statement saying she shares the "anger and dismay" of those who have been "hurt by the messages." The display was originally intended to encourage discussion on controversial issues such as abortion and gender identity but is instead being met with criticism, anger and vandalism.

The San Diego State University student government voted Wednesday to keep the school’s Aztec warrior mascot, rejecting claims that the mascot is a symbol of cultural appropriation. One member of the student council became so angry over the vote, which was debated for four hours, that she immediately resigned from her post, while another shouted, “Do your damn jobs.”

The office of BGLTQ Student Life at Harvard University has released a new school-sponsored guide telling students to “fight transphobia” and “get the facts about gender diversity.”The guide, which was distributed to students on campus, declares that “there are more than two sexes” and that “gender is fluid and changing,” adding that someone’s gender identity “can be affirmed and/or expressed in many ways,” and can even “change from day to day.”

A dean at Case Western Reserve University spoiled opening day for some Cleveland Indians fans by telling students that the team’s “Chief Wahoo” logo is oppressive and racist. Grover Gilmore admitted that he is a Cleveland sports fan but declared that he does not wear clothing with the logo and requested that students “consider the full impact on members of our community when choosing attire” and “the racism and oppression represented by the Cleveland baseball team’s mascot.”

A California State University at Fresno professor who was reported to the FBI for suggesting that Donald Trump should be sentenced to death has been placed on paid leave. Lars Maischak came under fire for stating that “Justice = The execution of two Republicans for each deported immigrant” and “In order to save American democracy, Trump must hang, the sooner and the higher, the better.” Now, the school has announced that, as a result of his threatening remarks, Maischak agreed to be placed on voluntary paid leave for the remainder of the semester.

#feminism #gender #blm #sjw #social justice #anti feminism #anti sjw #black lives matter #anti black lives matter #anti blm #free speech #college #trump #america

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delwray-blog · 6 years

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THE GREATEST DANGER FACING MAN TODAY IS THE JEWS

The Attitude of Communism toward Christianity The greatest danger facing the world today is the Jews! The Russian leader Vladimir Putin knows it very well. After having lived to see his country collapse and all because of a Bolshevist, Jewish Communist coup that succeeded and now controls the Soviet Union, once an Orthodox Christian nation turned into an Atheistic Dynasty by dirty money supplied by the Jews in New York City. The Jews have vowed to do it again here in America. Money speaks! The dirty money that overthrew Russia is now being used to destroy America and is behind all, and I say all the upheaval in the United States today, especially, the attacks on the current President Donald Trump and now his Supreme Court nominee Judge Brett Kavanaugh. An old philosopher once said, to know a thing well one must understand its first cause. It is unpleasant to realize that a certain element of apostate Jewry is behind the turmoil of this dark hour and the present Soviet persecution through which the Church of Jesus Christ is passing. The Jews and Communism: No informed person who is truthful denies the Jewish character of Communism! The writer recently published the names and nationalities of every leader in the Moscow dictatorship as it was set up many years ago. It was discovered that out of the 545 members of the bureaucracy, 454 were Jews and there were only 23 Russians in the group. In other words, the Russian people are governed by a gang of anti-Christian foreigners, many of whom are said to be unable to speak the language of the people they govern. Some of the principal officials of the Red government are reported to have come from the East Side of New York. It has been said on the floor of the United States Congress, and the charge has not been denied, that a certain Jewish banking concern in Wall Street sponsored Trotsky's mass meetings of rebellion in New York some years ago, sent him across the ocean secretly, and deposited millions of dollars in a Swedish bank to the credit of the destroyers, with which the Russian revolution was financed. In her remarkable book “Waters Flowing Eastward”, Mrs. L. Fry states that back in 1893 a Jewish secret order here in America appointed Jacob Schiff, a Wall Street Jew, chairman of its committee on Russian revolutionary activities. If this is true, it simply means that Mr. Schiff sat at his desk in New York and directed the destruction of the Czar's government thousands of miles away. It is impossible to separate Jewish Communism from Jewish Capitalism. Laboring men who think they can free themselves from the Money Power by embracing Communism are being betrayed by soap-box oratory. The Moscow leaders are the world's wealthiest Capitalists. They own one-sixth of the earth's surface. They control one hundred and sixty million Gentile slaves. The Russian people are not allowed to vote, own property, exercise free speech, enjoy the freedom of the press, or worship God. The masses are kept in their weakened, helpless condition by the most powerful system of secret police ever invented in the history of the world. The attitude of Communism toward Christianity was explained by Lunatcharski, one of the leading Jewish members of the Moscow dictatorship: "Why should we believe in God? We hate Christianity and Christians. Even the best of them must be regarded as our worst enemies. They preach love of one's neighbor, and pity, which is contrary to our principles. Christian love is a hindrance to the revolution. Down with love of one's neighbor; what we want is hatred. We must know how to hate, for only at this price can we conquer the universe. We have done with the kings of the earth; let us now deal with the kings of the skies. The anti-religious campaign must not be restricted to Soviet Russia: it should be carried on throughout the entire world. The fight should also be developed in the Moslem and Catholic countries, with the same ends in view and by the same means." There is no way of knowing how many millions of Russian Christians have been slain during the last one-hundred years because of their faith in Jesus Christ. The magazine, New Outlook, recently carried an article entitled, "Men of Russia." It was the author's purpose to make a critical examination of the ringleaders of international Communism. He says: "Some of the businessmen are Russians, but most of them are of other blood, and practically all of them have prison records. In considering the men of Russia, it should be remembered that it isn't often that ex-prisoners get a crack at the society which punished them, but they did in Russia." The writer in New Outlook then proceeds to discuss some of Moscow's principal Jewish fiends: "Joseph Stalin is a minor official of the Soviet Government. He is but one of the three hundred or so members of the Central Executive Committee, and yet, nevertheless, he was the first man of Russia. Although serving as secretary of the All-Russian Communist Party, Stalin was not a Russian. His every feature is commensurate with 'Stalin', the Russian word for steel." Parenthetically it should be remarked that Stalin was merely the customary "Gentile Front" for the Moscow Jewish leaders. His Gentile wife died a "mysterious" death and he immediately married a Jewess. "Lazarus M. Kaganovitch is a member of the Politbureau or arbitrary 'Brain Trust', and chief organizer of the Second Five Year Plan. This Polish Jew was Stalin's Number One Boy and was his logical successor as dictator. "Maxim Maximovich Litvinov is Commissar of Foreign Affairs. He was the super-traveling salesman of Bolshevism. This shrewd Polish Jew has fought diplomatic battles in every political arena where the gate receipts warranted his appearance. He returned from these victories from time to time to his spacious Moscow office to check up one more Red diplomatic triumph by sticking a new red glass tack in the huge map which covers the wall behind his desk. "Klementy Voroshilov (another Jew) was Commissar of War and Commander-in-Chief of the Army and Navy. He is the dashing yet modest cavalry officer who was charged with preparing the Russian forces for an anticipated war. "Mikhail Kalinin, (an Armenian Jew) was President of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics. Like all big leaders, he served his term in prison, taking an important part in the revolution of 1905 as a member of the Council of Workers' Deputies. "Karl Radek, (another Jew) was Contributing Editor of Izvestia, an official government newspaper. Radek has frequently been suppressed by radical organizations for being too radical. "Michael Borodin, Editor of the English-language Moscow Daily News. This Czechoslovakian Jew was educated at Valparaiso University in Indiana; and spent many years agitating for the International Communist Party, in Spain, in Mexico, in America, the British Isles, and China. "'Just' Podolsky, master of the Foreign Office Press-Censorship Bureau. He may have a first name, but it is doubtful that anyone in Russia, including his wife, knows it. He is a soft-spoken Jew in eight languages, not counting American slang, of which he has a thorough knowledge. Padolsky was a hundred percent Communist. "Jerry Lifschitz, Ex-Vice-Yankee Consul, ex-Second-in-Command of Moscow Amtorg. This Polish Jew had an American jail and prison record for I.W.W. activities; and an added palm for being twice tarred and feathered by irate Midwest American farmers. "Comrade Smirdovitch, (another Jew) is the 'Red Pope'. Smirdovitch, an atheist, is the official restrainer and regulator of religion in the U.S.S.R. He was a member of the important Central Executive Committee. As the official Anti-Christ of the Soviet Republics, he decided how far remaining priests of the church may go toward preaching the Word of God. Kindly, cultured, educated, tolerant in manner, Smirdovitch says religion will die out when divorced from superstitious ritual, pomp, and fear. His job was to help kill it." Toward the close of the article, the writer in the New Outlook says: "But the men who control Russia are not Russians. Members of the Jewish race from all over the world predominate. Every member of the foreign office press censor bureau is a Jew. Little men of Russia who help in responsible positions, heads of offices, trusts, are mostly Jews." Let Christians remember that the international Jewish Communists and Capitalists expect to eventually destroy all Gentile governments, rule the world, and establish throughout the earth the kind of conditions they have introduced in Soviet Russia. They expect to murder all Christian believers and blot Christianity out of existence. The struggle is between the philosophy of the Jew Karl Marx and the Gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ. The manner in which the Moscow Jews have proceeded with their program of destruction is recorded in a quotation taken from the London Times dated November 14, 1919. The quotation is a letter written by a British army officer, who was stationed at the time in southern Russia, to his wife in England. It reads: "The Bolshevists are devils. I hope to send you copies of 64 official photos taken by British officers at Odessa when the town was taken by the Bolshevists. I suggest you make them widely known. Their horror may make people realize. The victim gets crucified with nails through his elbows. The hands are treated with a solution which shrivels the skin. The skin is cut out with a razor, round the wrist, and peeled off, till it hangs by the fingernails, a human glove. The victim gets terrified and goes insane. Other photos are of women. Women with their breasts cut off to the bone. Passes issued to Bolshevists by commissaries authorize holders to arrest any girl they fancy for use of the soldiery. Sixty-two girls of all classes were arrested like this and thrown to the Bolshevist troops. Those who struggled were killed. The rest when used were mutilated and thrown dead or dying into the river. Slaughter-houses were choked with corpses. Hundreds of suspects, men, women, and children, were herded in these, doors and windows manned and the struggling mass fired into until most of them were dead or dying. The doors were then locked and they were left with veritable plague spots causing widespread epidemics. The Bible, to them, is a 'counter-revolutionary' book to be stamped out. Churches are used for anything from movie shows to 'slaughterhouses.'" Let no Christian be duped into believing that we are supposed to sit supinely by and permit the Reds to create a reign of terror in America simply because this menace happens to be a "Jewocracy." True, there is a stratum of Jewry that is indeed "Chosen" and has been a blessing to humanity through the centuries, but there is another stratum that is a "curse in all places" as Jeremiah said they would be. Speaking through the lips of the prophet in Ezekiel 38:3, God said: "I am against thee, O Gog" and this is a clear reference to Communism with its seat of government in "Meshech" (Moscow). It is possible that this invisible empire has existed as a self-propagating body ever since the Jewish leaders contacted the Chaldeans while in Babylonia. Persons holding to this view agree that the organization has almost completed its course, that the time for the consummation of the plot is near at hand, that the last great attack is now being launched for the purpose of setting up an international system of Jewish government. The existence of this secret sinister organization in New Testament times is implied in 1 John 4:3, "And this is that spirit of antichrist whereof ye have heard that it should come, and even now already is it in the world." The entire cabal (plot) is so large and far-reaching, its motives so hellish, its plan of attack so contrary to Christian thinking, that it simply staggers the mind when it is first exposed to view. But the results of its devastating influence may be seen both in history and among the nations today. It breathes the spirit of the last great Beast-Emperor described in the thirteenth chapter of Revelation. It discloses the perverted Messianic theories of an apostate people. This anti-Christ force has apparently manifested itself from its underground sources in different ways at different periods of history, but never with the boldness and permanency that it has since it came to the surface so many years ago. There have always been two kinds of Jews. One racial division represents all that is highest and best in Jewry and regards the Jews primarily as being a system of religion. The other has little inclination toward religion but regards Jewry as a political State, the purpose of which is to conduct world conquest until the nations are brought under one head with themselves in control and all the Gentiles changed into servants. In AD 70 when the Romans turned against the designing and wicked political leaders of Israel, the Pharisees and Sadducees were driven under cover. With the dispersion that followed, their taint was taken to the ends of the earth and has grown up in every nation. No doubt Jesus had this in mind when he warned to: "Beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and of the Sadducees." In all parts of the world, it appears that this poison "leaven" is "leavening" the whole lump of the nations. What used to be the Russian Empire is now completely "leavened." These are the subversive forces that have moved through the centuries, changing their form from time to time as governments have been made to heave, totter, cave in, and fall, but always with the same object in view, a final culmination when all nations will be leveled and a super-Jewish State set up, presided over by one man, their apostate Messiah. This is the genius behind Socialism and Communism. Let me say it again, Let Christians remember that the international Jewish Communists and Capitalists expect to eventually destroy all Gentile governments, rule the world, and establish throughout the earth the kind of conditions they have introduced in Soviet Russia. They expect to murder all Christian believers and blot Christianity out of existence. The struggle is between the philosophy of the Jew Karl Marx and the Gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ. America, you better take heed!

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republicstandard · 6 years

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Black Lives Don't Matter: UK Police and Press Ignore The Realities of Race

Recently the United Kingdom has finally had some news that puts us right back on top. Yes, that's right- after spending so long playing second fiddle to those swaggering, sneeringly glamorous New Yorkers (for 218 years!), we have done it. Finally, London is the most multicultural, multicriminal city in the West- number one for getting raped, stabbed, burgled and assaulted. In your face, America.

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As we know all too well from the Gamergate fiasco, when looking at real-world problems with difficult answers the most important thing to do is to shift the blame onto people who say edgy things online. From The Times:

Cressida Dick, the Metropolitan Police commissioner, said that often- trivial disputes between young people were escalating into murder and stabbings at unprecedented rates. The goading of rivals on online message boards and video sites “revs people up” and normalized violence, she said.

The speed at which disputes gathered pace echoed the way in which some Islamists, including the perpetrator of the lorry attack in Nice in 2016, were radicalized within days or weeks.

A febrile online atmosphere was among factors responsible for rising knife crime. Also to blame were drug-dealing, absent fathers and socioeconomics, Ms. Dick said.

Well, that's a whole lot of sweeping under the carpet and no mistake- you may remember Cressida Dick claiming that gangs of rapists have “probably” been in Britain for “centuries and centuries and centuries” so that's Nothing To Do With Islam, either. It is very cute how we see the topic of jihad slid into the middle of the quote to reinforce the message. It wasn't Islam that drove a man to murder 83 people and injure 453 more. It was the internet!

Damn you, 4Chan!

Maybe Dick is right, and YouTube is more of a problem than Islam, Facebook is worse than a failed multi-generational multicultural experiment, Gab is more terrible than mass immigration that not one British person was asked about; and LinkedIn is not just a place to get a new job, it is far more crippling to our society than the reality that Race and IQ are real; and most uncomfortable of all, IQ predicts both achievement and propensity for criminality. In Britain, Black people were over 3 times more likely to be arrested than White people in 2016, and Black women were more than twice as likely to be arrested as White women.

Wait! That's because Britain is racist!

Not so. As we know that from several studies into race bias, the UK is one of the least racist countries on the face of the planet. It appears to be the case that as the Cathedral can no longer say that Britons are racists, and it is objectively true that London is no longer British with only a 45% Ethnic British population, we are now entering a period where race is simply ignored. This is mind-blowingly irresponsible. The solution? Blame the internet.

It must be social media that drives a spike in criminality of such magnitude that even without the dreaded AR-15 we see more butchery on the streets of London than New York. It is the internet that led to a boy being stabbed to death over some stolen pasta. Drug crime is the fault of Instagram. Acid attacks? Blame Jack Dorsey for not clamping down on what can be said on Twitter.

Pesky things like facts and evidence might suggest otherwise. The Evening Standard reported last year that between June 2016 and June 2017:

The blade offenses include 214 killings, 391 attempted murders, 438 rapes, 182 other sexual assaults, and 14,429 robberies. There were also more than 18,500 assaults involving an injury or intent to inflict harm with a blade and 2,816 threats to kill with a knife.

The statisticians said that a 47 percent rise in knife crimes in London —where 35 young people aged under 25 have been killed by stabbings in the past 12 months — was a prime cause of the national increase.

Cressida Dick acknowledges as a footnote that absentee fathers and drug dealing are a problem, but will not state the obvious. We are dealing with a capital city that is no longer British controlled. As the BBC reported sullenly:

On Friday, a woman, 36, became the 10th victim after being stabbed to death in Haringey, north London.

In September last year, the MP for Croydon Central, Sarah Jones, said social media was "fuelling an escalation in the cycle of violence among young people".

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The Evening Standard said the following:

The 36-year-old was found suffering stab wounds, a spokesman said. She was pronounced dead just after 8 am. A 38-year-old man who knew the victim was arrested at the scene and is being held at a north London police station.

I want to use this short quote to show you how to read reports from the BBC and most British media when they try to discuss crime and race. You will rarely see mention of race or religion on the BBC, unless that piece is resolutely pro-multiculturalism. The problem is that in Britain, race does not matter at all when describing crime- even when to ignore it means death. Everyone, regardless of origin, ethnicity or belief system can be as British as I am, and then race is all that matters- because those new British citizens need help and protection from me, for some reason.

Perhaps that is a good thing and I am missing the point of all this entirely- but I do have certain quibbles about a reality that asks me to simultaneously deny my own racial identity at all costs, and then flip-flops between demanding that ethnic minorities are looking at with unwavering adoration while turning a blind eye to inconvenient statistics on crime, FGM, rape gangs and the utter failure of integration. That is a maddening double standard, enforced now by hate speech laws which are so subjective no Briton can speak freely in his own land, about things that are true.

This is how the BBC reports on an Iraqi who was trained to kill by ISIS, who was still allowed into the country and tried to blow up a train full of my kin.

BREAKING "Dangerous and devious" Surrey teenager jailed for life for Parsons Green Tube bombing, in which 51 people injured https://t.co/Fv4T9dKbNL

— BBC South East (@bbcsoutheast) March 23, 2018

Meanwhile, the BBC consider the reasonable call for tighter immigration to be far right and "right-wing rhetoric." If people decide to call a group far right then that is how the BBC will report. The BBC is an anti-White British organization- there can be no other rationale in a world where concern over immigration is a far right (i.e, White) position while ignoring overwhelming evidence of the impact of immigration on the lives of real people.

youtube

Haringey, where Friday's murder took place, has some interesting demography. as of a school census in 2013, 18.7% of school pupils between the ages of 3 and 18 were White British. The overall population of Haringey was less than 35% White British- and that's as of the 2011 census.

From Haringey Council's website:

Almost two-thirds of our population and over 70% of our young people are from ethnic minority backgrounds, and over 100 languages are spoken in the borough. Our population is the fifth most ethnically diverse in the country... The borough ranks among the most deprived in the country with pockets of extreme deprivation in the east.... the population is estimated to reach 286,900 by 2020, an increase of 5.9% from 2015. By 2025, Haringey’s population is estimated to reach 300,600, an increase of 10.9% from 2015.

Population growth locally is due to higher annual births than annual deaths, and net migration gain driven by high annual international migration.

We all know that correlation is not causation, and that race alone is not an indicator of criminality. That being said, we cannot ascribe the case of Haringey to mere coincidence when taken with the sad corollaries in so many boroughs of London. Proclaiming not all is never an argument when faced with overwhelming evidence showing a significant over-representation.

In 2010, The Telegraph reported:

The official figures, which examine the ethnicity of those accused of violent offenses in London, suggest the majority of men held responsible by police for gun crimes, robberies, and street crimes are black...

The data provide a breakdown of the ethnicity of the 18,091 men and boys who police took action against for a range of violent and sexual offenses in London in 2009-10.

They show that among those proceeded against for street crimes, 54 percent were black; for robbery, 59 percent; and for gun crimes, 67 percent. Street crimes include muggings, assault with intent to rob and snatching property.

This was eight years ago. These statistics were the golden years in comparison to today. Incidentally, the Met Police lost their national statistics accreditation from the governing body in 2014, after it came to light that the police were misrepresenting data. I suppose they were racist numbers and had to be massaged to better represent the actual reality that diversity is our strength.

The point is that we have known for years that Black males are vastly over-represented in both crimes and as victims of violent crimes. Ignoring the problem in favor of pursuing "hate-crimes" and simply ignoring low-value crimes such as mugging and shoplifting has given a free ride to criminals across the city. Fewer police officers on the streets, shops looted with impunity and with a swift threat of violence to any citizen who dares defend themselves- for all know that London is truly lawless. The police cannot protect you from crime, but don’t complain. That could be hate speech.

We have 900+ specialist officers across London dedicated to investigating all hate crime. For more info visit https://t.co/VNyHq5vu5T #NHCAW pic.twitter.com/pp4XzyU5We

— Metropolitan Police (@metpoliceuk) October 19, 2017

“The black community has to look at itself and say that, at the end of the day, these figures suggest we are heavily – not casually – involved in violent crime. We are also involved in crime against ourselves – and we regularly attack each other.” ~Shaun Bailey, 2010

Instead of addressing this problem- which if we do genuinely have any concern about human life at all, we must- Cressida Dick and a compliant media will instead blame Twitter spats and request further censorship of the online world. Bear in mind, this is a milieu where writing Islam promotes killing people will already have your Twitter account deleted. What we need then is to make it impossible for anyone to say "for some reason, blacks and certain other minorities are statistically over-represented in violent crime and that needs addressing, or more people will die." Well, I have said it. Arrest me for caring about people enough to not want them to die on the streets of my lost and broken capital city.

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Why do the BBC and the Metropolitan Police make excuses for London becoming a Third World country? Well; the truth is racist.

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preventsexualassault-blog · 6 years

Text

Topic: Sexual Assault Awareness

Specific purpose: To inform our audience about the intercultural issues around sexual assault and how to stop it

Introduction:

I. Attention Getter: “You’re not a victim for sharing your story. You are a survivor setting the world on fire with your truth. And you never know who needs your light, your warmth, and raging courage.” - Alex Elle

II. Introduce Topic/Explanation of chosen intercultural communication issue: The goal is to inform you on what sexual assault is and how it’s dealt in courts and the media.

III. In other words, we are going to discuss what exactly is the issue at hand, the causes of this problem, and the solutions to put an end and help those who have been a victim.

(Transition to Body)

Body:

I. Sexual assault in society and in the media.

How sexual assault is treated in court, and how sexual assault is talked about in the media.

Brock Turner, 6 month jail sentence for Stanford rape case.

People electing candidates to public office, knowing those candidates have a history of sexual assault.

Both examples of white male privilege

The role of power in intercultural communication puts women, who are often the victim of sexual assault, at a disadvantage

Women are far more likely to be the target of sexual assault. 1 out of every 6 American woman has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape. While only 1 out of every 33 adult American men been the victim of an attempted or completed rape.

Often, it is the point of view of men that is communicated when discussing why sexual assault happens. For example blaming the victim.

Example: Amber Rose’s Slut Walk

Sexual assault has become difficult or shameful to talk about.

Up to 60% of sexual assaults are not reported to the police

Young women have begun to see harassment or sexual assault as “normal”

Men don’t report it because they are taught to be “macho”

D. Sexual assault will continue to be perceived as an act of power. “Even those who are not direct targets of sexual harassment experience its consequences” (Merkin, 154).

1. Hostility towards women will continue, which means women will lose their chances to have leadership roles and growth in the workplace.

2. Sexual abuse can mentally drain a victim, giving power to the suspect. Due to the fact that this is a very severe and traumatic experience, most victims will choose to not speak out because they will (1) believe no one will be able to understand them, (2) they lack or don’t know the resources that they can help recover, (3) lose self-esteem, which might lead to self-harm.

3. Identities have silenced and marginalized. They are often perceived worthless beings, who do not deserve the basic amount of respect. As a society, we are not open to discussion, which causes most to have a limited point of view and lose the desire to see what life is like when an assault has occurred.

(Transition to next Main Point)

II. Cause: Introduce what causes the problem. (Note: it is not about what the problem

causes, but what causes the problem- there is a difference.)/Application of a minimum

of 3 strong concepts, ideas, and/or approaches to understand the issue

A. Culture has played a role in tolerance towards sexual abuse.

1. Explain how the cause causes the problem: For sexual predators, individuals who will follow authority without question just to maintain peace interpersonally are easy prey because these individuals will have difficulty to report sexual abuse since it will mean that they will have to break their cultural views.

2. Evidence that the cause actually causes the problem: In Latin American countries such as Argentina, Brazil, Chile, they are more or less collective cultures, high in power distance, and high in uncertainty avoidance, meaning that they value interdependence relationships, respect authority, and have clear direction by following rules, “possibly due to the collectivism that leads to avoidance communication to blend in with the group” (Merkin, 160 and 167).

B. Describe what the cause is: (Why is the problem taking place? If there is

more than one cause, then you can add more sub-points and explain them): Masculinity as stated before has been a driving force and now, a slow wide-known cause for sexual assault and harassment.

1. Explain how the cause causes the problem: Because men are supposed to welcome and push for the sexual advances, it is often accepted. In fact, it is not challenged because “Due to the Machismo culture, most men do not take the law seriously, and it is rarely enforced”, which reduces the chances of victims coming forward with reports.

2. Evidence that the cause actually causes the problem: “Rejecting psychologists’ characterizations of rapists as mentally ill deviants, feminist rape scholars have described them as mostly normal men, motivated chiefly by a desire to prove their masculinity and to dominate and control women” (Bryden and Madore, 299)

C. Describe what the cause is: Language used

Socially construction of gender: “Differences between femininity/ masculinity are symbolically embodied,performed, and communicated within our specific cultural contexts”(Sorrells 56)

1. Explain how the cause causes the problem:

“Meanings are constructed and assigned through communication to these categories of difference -man/women” ex. Strong/ weak , rational/emotional, you hit like a girl , (Sorrells 56)

Two gender system expresses the relationship of power.

Important role in structure of domination and subordination in social, political,and economic settings

2. Evidence that the cause actually causes the problem:

Words and meaning associated with gender has affected how women/men are perceived and what is expected of them. Ex of the activity the prof. Did about the common words used to rate female and male professors on rate my professor.

D. Describe what the cause is:

Media and popular culture

1. Explain how the cause causes the problem:

“Popular culture normalize culturally informed ways of interacting, social practices, and hierarchies of power”(Sorrells 155)

2. Evidence that the cause actually causes the problem:

Production of social identities

Standpoints and positionalities

E. Address the cause (Have any steps been taken to prevent the problem from occurring? If so, why haven’t they worked? If not, address the cause and explain why it is important to consider this cause.):

Meanings of what it means to be a man or woman have “been challenged, contested, and changed through communication over time” (Sorrells ex feminist social movement

Two gender categories have been contested by third gender and others outside this

system.

Women in film movement to encourage and offer a broader and usually unrepresented/ silenced perspective from different cultures. ex. #52FilmsByWoman , wif.org

ReFrame a organization that is taking action to “further gender parity in the media industry... that engage senior industry decision makers”. (ReFrameProject.org)

(Transition to next Main Point)

III. There are social inequalities in race, ethnicity, gender, and/or sexuality in schools, workplaces, and public locations like supermarkets as well as gyms and due to these inequalities, sexual assault and harassment continue to grow while manifesting itself as typical behavior that should be tolerated. In fact, some will view sexual assault as inappropriate behavior while others will keep quiet to avoid confrontation based on cultural views.

A. Explain how your solution works: We plan to speak on an individual and group platform. Most of us here use social media somehow or are exposed to it. We need to be open to change and use our voices for those who are silenced by exploited power. That way, we can better educate survivors and people such as bystanders who will suffer the effects indirectly.

1. For K-12 schools, college campuses, and workplaces, we stand by providing a clear understanding of the policy against sexual assault as well as education of what it is exactly, how to report it, and what to do if you are a victim or bystander. People who are employees or volunteers must be properly trained and readily have the resources needed for these victims such as “free emergency contraception, antibiotics and post-exposure HIV preventative treatment available in school health centers. Lastly, administer appropriate discipline, including suspension and expulsion, in order to eliminate the hostile environment, enable the victim to recapture her life, and prevent repeat offenders” (Solutions for Sexual Assault on College Campus).

B. Prove that your solution addresses the problem: This way, we can stop repeating offenders and prove to victims that they are not alone, they will not be shamed, and they will be supported regardless of the circumstances.

1. With better education, we will advocate and push for more centers to provide STD testing and counseling services to support these sexual assault survivors. More individuals will understand what is inappropriate behavior versus what is and what to do when confronted with this dilemma. When provided with self-defense courses and life skills courses should be widely available, it was proven successful for young girls in Kenya because they knew how to fight off attackers and knew where and how to contact for help. If we push for more courses, more resources, and stronger policies to ourselves, we reduce the number of assaults and put a stop to repeating offenders.

C. Men who complain about sexual harassment and sexual assault will no longer be dismissed, hated, seen as people with little credibility, and will not suffer consequences for the assumption that men do not face sexual abuse. Those who are part of the LGBTQ culture “face higher rates of poverty, stigma, and marginalization, which puts [them] at greater risk for sexual assault. [They] also face higher rates of hate-motivated violence, which can often take the form of sexual assault” (Sexual Assault and the LGBTQ Community) and by providing them with resources and a team who are proven to be knowledgeable, we can lower the counts.

On our campus here at CSUN we have our own Police station that serves as a safe place to not only find help when in need of immediate assistance, but also information on different types of support groups to prevent and help victims of sexual assault.

Conclusion: So, we have tried to create a bigger picture of how Sexual assault is depicted in the media and culturally. To help our audience gain a greater understanding of sexual assault and its victims.

I. Signal End (Ex: In conclusion)

II. Reinforce Main Idea

III. Review Points

Social Injustice: Sexual assault victims in society and in the media.

Sexual assault will continue to be an act of power, with women having a higher risk of being the victim.

2. Causes: Men are considered the leaders and are often the rule makers, as well as the oppressors. This causes the media to be bought or sueded one side or the other

Womens voices are hushed by control of these male figures. Some may not even report harassment in fear of their own prosecution.

3. Solution: Acknowledging the problem

Spreading awareness of the injustices and causes to the public in as many ways as possible. Using our voices as well as branches of social media to reach as many as possible.

Providing outreach and care programs for victims.

STD testing, Counseling services, and letting victims know the are not alone.

c. Placing the blame on the perpetrador instead of the victim.

IV. Memorable Ending: Pass out the slips to indicate how each person defines their action/label to stop sexual harassment

0 notes