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#i just became SO obsessed and rewatched it back to back
bleue-flora · 3 days
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Would you agree that between c!dream and c!punz, c!punz seems to be the more crueler. I was talking to another blog about it, and we spoke about the final lore streams where c!punz didnt care about c!clingys problems, most notably c!tommy almost taking his own life in exile (but then again he is desensitized to death cuz revival book lol) But, c!punz was the one to stick to the revival book plan near the end while c!dream opened up and showed vulnerability. I have seen a lot of fics characterize c!punz as being the one to be more softer and less inclined to hurt others for a goal, but after seeing the final streams I can't help but feel like its the other way around. I'm really curious on your take about it, and its fine if you disagree. Also really love your blog, you seem like such a kind person :)
Hmm ok well here are my thoughts on the matter at the moment, however as I rewatch more lore I might change my opinion.
Well in regards to c!Punz not caring about clingy duo’s problems, you’re assuming he hasn’t heard it before. We don’t know if thats new information, it’s possible c!Dream told him about the tower. In fact, since he was often still apart of the smp and conversations going on it’s very likely he’s heard a lot of what they said already. He’s a spy after all, it’s his job to know things.
Secondly, it’d be very hard to be empathetic to someone about themselves almost killing themself over a year ago when they just broke into the prison and murdered his friend. The revive book and such has clearly corrupted both of their empathies seen in their experiments. So, c!Punz already has a lack of empathy or at least is desensitized, the last person I’d expect him to sympathize with would be his enemy, especially when clingy duo weren’t really hearing what he had to say. I mean it’s insulting to be ignored after lying and hiding for so long and finally be able to share your opinion, but also the fact that clingy duo (and others) really thought he was cold enough to betray his friend for a measly amount of money to the point they question when it turns out to be fake. I mean that’s pretty offensive.
On that note though, it is also important to point out that those conversations in the finale are in his ‘evil role persona’ just like c!Dream he’s playing a part - one of the greedy mercenary just in this case for power. So if he seems cruel that’s intentional. Though I will say, he does give c!Tubbo and c!Tommy plenty of steak when they ask, which does say something, with this being c!Dream’s response:
“Wow, being humane. You could have waited.” And “don’t give him more, don’t give him more” [5:50]
And most importantly, I think that because we don’t get to see c!Punz break down like c!Dream the assumption is that even though it turns out c!Dream just didn’t want to be alone, c!Punz is still power hungry. But I think that’s a little unfair to c!Punz because it’s not like we saw him vulnerably be opened up like that, so is it fair to say he still has the stated goals. I talk about this a little more here [post]. What he does say in that conversation isn’t about power but about friendship. When Tommy is dissecting c!Dream c!Punz remarks on it:
“What can you just read minds now? are you just a mind reader—you knew it like—What?” [clip]
And this could probably be taken different ways, but given how he goes quiet whenever c!Dream wants to talk and seems to defend him in their conversation I see it more as like a - don’t put words into his mouth sort of thing. And because c!Tommy and people kinda do that it makes sense for c!Punz to be on guard for it. And there’s the comment about him being c!Dream’s friend. [clip]
In the less performative moments in the ending finale, c!Punz isn’t cutting in with something about power but about friendship and having c!Dream’s back. So I’m of the opinion more so that c!Punz was c!Dream’s friend, c!Dream became afraid and obsessed with death, and c!Punz stayed by his side, getting corrupted along with him. If it was about the Plan and power for c!Punz, I think he would’ve said different things like arguing with c!Dream about his goal and stuff. And there’s not really a lot of evidence to say c!Punz would’ve stayed by the plan had things not ended (though we shall never know for certain). But I think while it’s a common assumption to make, I think it’s a little unfair to say c!Punz was all just for the plan because we don’t hear him get fully vulnerable.
So given that, no I don’t think c!Punz is particularly crueler. But I do think he would do things c!Dream wouldn’t. While c!Dream is run by rational thoughts, c!Punz seems to be more emotional so (as expressed in my fics) I could totally see him going for violent revenge on behalf of his friendship with c!Dream. Perhaps then that makes him crueler? But I guess it would depend on your perspective of cruel, I suppose I was seeing cruel in this context as heartless, which I don’t think c!Punz is. In other words, he is wholesome to c!Dream, but everyone who wronged him better watch out. (I mean think about the scene of c!Punz leading c!Tommy and c!Tubbo down the stairs enraged by them killing c!Dream and him suggesting c!Purpled and c!Dream tie c!Quackity to a chair and torture him.)
Hope that provides some insight into the matter. :) and aww thank you that’s so sweet. <3 <3 <3
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minimoefoe · 1 year
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with the way things are going rn, I'm absolutely gonna be doing a full rewatch of oitnb again after I've finished s7 lmao
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moderndaymelodrama · 9 months
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apparently people are complaining about how many times nick says he’s bi in season 2 of heartstopper and saying it’s cringe?!? like just say you don’t care about bisexual people and go
as someone who for years never came out to anyone because the second it came up in conversation the word “bisexual”, which felt so comfortable in my head, became terrifying and disgusting the second i tried to say it out loud; watching the way it is used in the show in such a casual and positive way is incredibly affirming and important. when i first started questioning my sexuality, bisexual felt like such a perfect label and i loved it, but after so long of not being able to come out as well as coming out to people and not getting the support i was looking for, i drifted away from the label. it didn’t feel like me anymore. i was so ashamed to say it out loud that i became ashamed in my head too.
it’s only just hit me today how much heartstopper has helped me with seeing bisexuality in a more positive light. when first watching season 1, i had to pause because i burst into tears when the scene of nick watching those “how i knew i was bisexual” videos came up. the same thing happened in season 2 when he talks about a guy he was obsessed with as a kid who he, only looking back, realises he had a crush on. i just realised today that the bisexual label feels like me again, in the most wonderful way.
nick wanting to come out to people but not being able to speak it out loud when he gets the chance is REAL. him constantly having to reiterate what his sexuality is because bi erasure is so common is REAL. i’m sorry if you find that cringy 💙💜💗
thank you @aliceoseman @chronicintrovert for everything you do. there’s so much more i want to post about the new series but i want to finish rewatching it first :) this just felt too important to wait x
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writeroutoftime · 11 months
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you found me
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(neither gifs are my own)
pairing: mcu!peter parker x reader
summary: as the multiverse is in peril, peter promises he will find you after strange's spell is cast. but how can peter remind you of who you are and what you mean to him?
warnings: angst but then fluff!
words: 1.4k
a/n: so, I just rewatched no way home and had this idea, which was so much fun to write! also, I just couldn't help but imagine the whole "I will always find you" line from the show once upon a time. that was my middle/early high school obsession lol. anyways, enjoy and please let me know what you think!
oOoOo
The wind whipped around him, and the adrenaline pumped through his system at rapid speed. Peter knew he had only minutes, but he couldn't help but take in the sight of Ned, MJ and - most importantly - you one last time.
"Listen, you're all about to forget who I am." Peter spoke. "Strange agreed to cast this spell to end all of this."
"What? No!" Ned and MJ shouted as you simply stared at Peter with tears in your eyes.
If the entire multiverse wasn't on the line, Peter would have broken at the look you gave him. But this was for the people he loved, for you. He had to make this sacrifice to keep everyone safe.
"But you'll find us." you finally spoke up, voice shaky yet confident. "You're going to find me, and then we'll figure it out. Together."
Peter couldn't help but smile. Even with all that had happened, you still had immense faith in him. He swore to himself he would find the three of you and make it all right again.
"Yes, I'll find you." he vowed, taking you in his arms. "I got you to fall for me once, I can do it again." he chuckled, pressing his forehead against yours one last time.
You revealed in the gesture, unbothered by how selfish you were being with Peter's time. After a few moments, you pulled back and quickly worked to unclasp the necklace that sat against your neck.
Hurriedly, you passed the item into Peter's hand and shut his fingers around it. "I know you will. And then you can give me this." you told him, cupping his face and savoring one last kiss.
Peter was the first to pull away, committing the last smile you would give him as more than a stranger to memory. This would not be the last time he held you in his arms. It couldn't be.
oOoOo
Days morphed into weeks, and weeks into months. Peter was well and truly on his own in New York like he never existed in the first place. That first week he holed up in his new apartment, mourning the loss of his life - of you.
But when the self-pity subsided, Peter marched down the busy streets and checked all your frequent spots until he finally found you one day. The sun framed your figure like a spotlight, and Peter felt as though the breath had been stolen from him. It was like falling in love all over again.
Your melodic laughter rang out of the coffee shop, face scrunched up over a joke MJ shared with you and Ned. The scene tugged at his heart, and suddenly, fear washed over Peter. He looked down to his hands and gripped your necklace even tighter.
It had been a present he gifted you on your first birthday the two of you celebrated as a couple. It was a small, dainty necklace he had laughed at when he first saw it. You had found out early on that Peter Parker was Spiderman, and so the silver spider quickly became a prized possession for you. Often times it was slipped underneath your clothing to tamp down any suspicion, but it was always on you, claiming it was a good luck charm for the both of you.
Looking down at his closed fist and back up to you, Peter was suddenly seized with fear. What if you never remembered him? Or worse, what if you remembered him and didn't want to be with him anymore?
He watched you for a few more moments and saw how carefree you looked. Could he really subject you to all the chaos and danger his life entailed all over again? He vowed he would find you and make you remember, but he had also promised himself to also protect you. Maybe this was how that happened.
Without another glance, Peter turned on his heel and dashed out the door. Clueless to the fact that you caught a fleeting glimpse of him as he ran away, curious and left with an empty feel afterwards.
Over the next three weeks, Peter continued to see you from afar at the coffee shop you frequented. Each time, he ached to be near you, but held back from approaching. He just had to know you were okay, remind himself that he was making the right choice.
What Peter hadn't taken into account was the chance that you would notice - and be interested in - him. It was during the fourth week that you finally approached Peter's table as he poured over his study materials, looking down at him rather nervously.
"Hi." you began softly. "I'm sorry to bother you, but I've seen you around here recently. You look so familiar. Have we met?"
Here it was, he thought as his heart beat rapidly. Peter's chance to explain everything and make you remember him. But as he opened his mouth, it seemed his mind had a different plan.
"N-no. I don't think so." he said. Your shoulders sagged at his words, sparking something within Peter. Even now, he never wanted to be the source of your disappointment. "But, uh, I'm Peter. Peter Parker." he introduced.
You offered a dazzling smile, sticking your hand out. "Hi, Peter, it's nice to meet you. I'm y/n." you introduced, taking the seat across from him.
oOoOo
Peter swore he fell for your twice as hard this time around. The two of you talked for hours that first day at the coffee house. Of course, he feigned innocence and pretended not to know the answers to all the questions he asked. But, regardless, it felt so wonderful to be near and to talk to you again.
It became a regular occurrence for the two of you to meet at the coffee shop, but your exchanges quickly expanded outside of the shop's walls. Each time he saw you, Peter tried to gauge if there was any spark to demonstrate you remembered him and your lives together, but each time he was disappointed. Never in you. In himself over the entire situation.
Soon enough, Peter had invited you over to his apartment when the weather derailed your plans of a stroll around the park. You happily accepted, wanting to know more about the man who had quickly become such an important part of your life. He led you into the studio apartment and left you to explore for a minute while he ran to grab a glass of water in the kitchen.
Glancing around Peter's apartment, you noticed how little decoration or personalization there was. No pictures on his dresser or posters on the walls, only a few post-it notes scattered here and there. The one thing that did catch your eye, however, was a flash of a silver necklace that laid delicately on the dresser.
Peter hardly seemed like the jewelry type and so you stepped forward to inspect it further. Slowly, you reached out your hand and threaded the cool metal chain between your fingers, the pendant hanging in the air. A small laugh left your lips as you noticed the necklace was of spider silhouette.
There was something that struck you about the necklace. It was so familiar, almost as if it were out of a dream. Somewhere deep inside, there was an urge to put on the necklace, but before you could, you heard Peter's footsteps behind you.
"Oh, I'm sorry, Peter." you apologized, quickly setting the necklace back where you found it. "I shouldn't have been snooping, I just couldn't help myself."
Peter stared at you, eyes wide and his mouth slightly open. "I-I, no, it's okay." he stuttered out, swallowing harshly. "Uh, it belongs to a real important person in my life." he added, lamely gesturing to the necklace.
"It's beautiful." you admitted, still unsure if Peter was angry or not.
To your surprise, Peter reached around you to pick the necklace back up. He glanced down at the jewelry, before holding it up and gestured to you. Without hesitation, you nodded and turned so that your back faced Peter.
He stepped up behind you and immediately you could feel his warm breath fan against your neck as your breath hitched. He lifted the necklace and let the chain and pendant fall against your skin before he clasped it shut. You reached down and held the spider pendant in your hand, gasping as another rush of recognition ran through you.
Turning around, you looked at Peter who snapped out of his trance zoned in on the necklace. His eyes met yours and there was something behind them you could almost put your finger on. Both of you took a step closer to each other and Peter reached out to gently cup your cheek.
"Just, trust me." he whispered, leaning towards you to mold his lips against yours.
Your eyes fluttered shut, instantly, and you leaned into Peter's chest and the warmth of his chapped lips. Your hands threaded in his hair at the nape of your neck, sighing into the kiss.
Slowly pulling away, your eyes remained closed for just a moment longer. Then, as if suddenly breathing in new life, you gasped loudly and opened your eyes. "Peter." you whispered, gripping tightly to his shirt. "You found me."
Peter made no attempt to stop the tears that fell down his cheeks as he held you close to him, pressing soft, quick kisses all over your face. "I will always find you."
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moonlightazriel · 10 months
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Do you love me? /// Aemond X F!Reader
Summary: Ever since the accident, Aemond has been insecure about his appearance, but things get even worse when he hears those nasty words reach the ears of his future wife.
Warnings: Nothing much, just angst
Word Count: 2,2K
Notes: Okay, I was rewatching HOTD and became obsessed with Aemond again, but the difference is that this time I’m a writer and decided to give it a try on writing for him cuz why not? And yes, it’s based on that lovely scene from Queen Charlotte, who cares?
Main Masterlist
“Perhaps you should not get too close, my lady.” The man behind her warned, but she couldn’t help, her feet carried her closer to the giant animal. Its leathery nose sniffed her scent before the large dragon rested its head on the floor.
“They are fascinating creatures.” The beast’s golden eyes watched her closely as she extended her arm, letting her fingers brush slowly over the dragon’s nose. Vaghar huffed, the warm breath fanning all over her body, and she smiled as the dragon allowed her to continue.
“You think so?” Another voice, deeper and serious, sounded but she didn't bother to turn around, a hushed whisper was shared and the sound of boots sounded against the stones.
“Of course they are. And those afraid of them are fools.” She replied, and a low chuckle sounded, she liked that sound. “My father told me tales about King Jaehaerys and Queen Alysanne, when they did us the honour to visit our family, how those beautiful creatures flew over our home.” She kept rambling. “I have been dreaming with them ever since, being so close to the stars, feeling the breeze in my face, perhaps I might ask my dear husband-to-be for a special ride, if he bothers talking to me, ever.” She turned around, regretting every word that left her lips as Prince Aemond stood before her.
“I am sure he will consider such a request from his future wife.” She felt the heat in her cheeks, slightly embarrassed for what she had said.
“Your Grace.” She bowed to her betrothed, and the Prince gave her a small smile, watching in delight as she rushed out of the dragon’s pit.
⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆
His soon to be wife, was a true beauty, her hair was always falling in curls behind her back, she was always wearing dresses in various shades of blue to honour her house, a true born Tyrell. She had left HighGarden when the Hand suggested that the King should marry her to his second son, to strengthen their alliances, Aemond would do everything to fulfil his duties to the crown. A marriage for allies, never for love.
But as he spotted her walking quietly by her Lord Father’s side as they entered the throne room, he knew it wouldn’t be hard for him to fall in love with her, a kind, well educated and beautiful lady.
She never looked at him with disgust, always seemed rather interested in what he spoke and how he carried himself, he had caught her gaze fixed on him as the two sat by the library to read, more times than he could remember. He knew she didn’t deserve a scarred, one-eyed prince as a husband, and she was too gentle to say so, he knew deep down that she would never love him. And he accepted that, as long as he could call her his wife.
⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆
“What is it like, Lidia?” He stopped in his tracks as he heard her sweet, melodic voice coming from the garden.
“What, my lady?” The servant replied and the other woman sighed, if he closed his eye, he could see her blushing, the red tainting her face, until it reached the roots of her beautiful hair.
“The first night after the wedding!” She lowered her voice, and he heard the servant giggle. “You’re married, are you not?”
“I am, my lady. I can assure you that it’s going to be fine, Prince Aemond will take good care of you.” The reply came and he smirked with that.
“But, my lady..” A third feminine voice sounded, one he did not recognize. “Do not forget to ask for him to keep the eyepatch, you will not want to be looking at that deformed face on your wedding night.” The comment was followed by a few women laughing. His heart twisted in his chest as she didn’t say anything.
He was used to the looks, the whispers, the frowns and the ladies in court running away from him, but the idea of her being one of those people, it hurt him deeply. He left without waiting for her reply.
“You should watch your tongue.” Y/N pointed to the lady. “Or else, Vaghar might want something different for dinner, and I heard that the meat from the Stormlands’ is quite good.” She turned her back to the group, marching towards the Keep.
⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆
She stood by the door, the fancy nightgown hugged her frame as she shivered in the cold night air. Aemond looked at her, his lilac eye glowing in the dim candle light.
“We do not have to do anything.” He simply stated. Y/N looked at him confused, with her eyebrows knit together in a lovely frown.
“We have to, it is what’s expected from us, Lord husband.” She said, walking closer to where he stood, next to the big bed.
“Duty, right.” It was all that left his mouth for the rest of the night as he laid bare with her, only the eyepatch covering his insecurities, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, he touched her with adoration and worshipped her body as he made love to her. But the way she didn’t look at him, how her face would contort in something he didn’t know what it meant, this told him everything he needed to know.
⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆
“How was it, my lady?” Lidia asked as she brushed through Y/N’s locks.
“I was so scared that I could not even look at him, and Gods help me, I am still not able to walk properly, it was really painful.” She said, looking at the woman.
“It is normal, when you do it again, it will be less and less painful, until all you can feel is the pleasure growing in your belly.” Her toes curled in excitement as she thought of going to bed again with her husband.
But it died as soon as a servant handed her a note, in his fancy handwriting, he stated that the two fulfilled their duties graciously, and now she should go back to her chambers. She felt the tears pricking in the corner of her eyes, what she might’ve done to offend the prince?
⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆
Y/N wandered alone through the halls, it’s been months since she had a proper talk with her husband, he was always too busy to be near her, so she would spend her days alone, reading, embroidering, sometimes alongside her dear sister Helaena, or having tea with the Queen.
It was in one of those afternoons that she felt something was wrong, the warmth in the Keep was too much to handle as she sipped her tea, the Queen was speaking with Helaena about the twins.
“Excuse me, Your Grace…” she said, suddenly feeling everything spin around her.
“Are you okay, sister?” The princess asked, noticing how much paler she looked, and the sweat coating her forehead.
Y/N couldn’t muster a response as the ring in her ears got too much and her body collapsed. She blinked, feeling the fresh air coming from the windows in the Queen’s room. She felt embarrassed as she noticed the Queen, some servants and a Meistre, all of them looking at her with worried eyes.
“Are you feeling well darling?” Queen Alicent asked, squeezing her hand.
“Yes, your Grace, perhaps it was the heat?” She inquired, her eyes landing on the man in front of her.
“I am afraid you are wrong, my Lady. You are with child.” The older woman smiled at her, leaning to hug her. She felt her whole body shaking, a child was a blessing, but how would she tell her husband, who doesn’t even acknowledge her, that he was going to be a father?
“This is great news, I am sure Aemond will be just as happy.” Alicent spoke, getting up and urging everyone to leave the room.
⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆
“Come in!” The Prince answered, and Y/N pushed his chambers doors open. She gasped a little when he turned to her, she barely got to see him for months, and he was just as handsome as she remembered, this time, the eyepatch was discarded and his scars and the sapphire eye were on full display, he was beautiful. “What are you doing here?” He asked, starting to turn his back to her.
“I am with child.” She blurted and he stopped, his lilac eye looking at her, she walked closer, until she was right in front of him, she grabbed his hand, placing it on her belly. “You are going to be a father.”
“That is great, I am sure the King is very happy.” He said, walking backwards and removing his hand, the smile that tugged at her lips quickly vanished at his reaction.
“What about you? Are you happy, Lord Husband?” She inquired.
“I am thankful that we were able to do our parts in this court.” It was all he said. “I am busy, you should go back to your chambers.” It broke her heart hearing that, when his own was almost bursting out of his chest with happiness. She looked at him incredulously, tears sliding down her pretty face.
“Did I do something to offend you, Your Grace?” The pain was evident in her voice.
“Not at all.” His tone was dismissive.
“Do you love me?” She inquired, stepping closer to him once again.
“What?”
“Do you love me?” She repeated, louder and firmer this time.
“I am trying to protect you.” She looked hurt, and angry.
“Do you love me?”
“I cannot….. This conversation is leading no..” She interrupted him.
“Do you love me?” The question hit him hard, of course he loved her, more than anything, but all he did was out of love for her.
“Y/N, please. Stop!” He begged, she paced around the room, breathing heavily.
“Is it because you do not believe that I could love you?” She fixed her gaze on him once again, tears falling free from her eyes. “I do.” He almost repeated the words to himself, she loved him.
He looked at her without saying a word, not knowing what to even say, but she continued.
“I love you Aemond, in fact, I love you so much that I will do as you wish.” He looked at her confused. “If you do not love me, all you have to say is you do not love me, and I will go. I will go back to my chambers now, I will stop bothering you, I will go back to my life and we can have our separate lives and I will have this baby alone. But first, you have to say that you do not love me!”
She was sobbing, while she hugged her own body, shaking, all the sadness pouring from her soul.
“You have to tell me that I’m utterly alone in this world.”
He looked at her astonished, his heart ripping in half at her confession, how alone and isolated she must’ve felt all these months, he always thought he was doing the right thing, sparing her from having to be seen by his side, his lips parted and the words left his mouth before he could stop himself.
“I am a monster, everyone knows that, I don’t deserve you, you deserve better than this.” He pointed to the scar.
“Do you love me?” She asked again, tired.
“You do not wish a life with me for yourself.” He felt the tears in his own eye. “No one wishes that.”
“Aemond!” She protested. “I will stand with you between the heavens and earth, I will tell you every day that you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen, that your scar doesn’t scare me, and that I love you just like you are. “Her words were so pure, honest, that his heart jumped in his chest. “Do you love me?” She asked for the last time.
“I love you.” He shouted, so loud that his throat burned. “From the moment I saw you with Vaghar, I have loved you desperately, I cannot breathe when you are not near. I love you, Y/N. My heart calls your name.”
He couldn’t hold himself anymore, closing the distance between the two, he held her face in his hands, pulling her closer as he kissed her, her lips tasted like salt and cinnamon, and they were so soft against him, she held him too, afraid that he would disappear, that they would go back to that torment.
“I am so sorry for everything, I wanted to be with you, hold you in my arms everyday. But I could not, what they spoke, how they looked at us.” Y/N looked at him, her eyes puffy and red from crying.
“I do not care for any of them. All I care about is you, about us, and the family we have now.” He rested his hand on her belly.
“I heard them talking, the day before our wedding, I thought you agreed with them.” He confessed.
“You what?” She raised an eyebrow. “In fact, my love, after those nasty words about you, I threatened to feed her to Vaghar.” He looked at her, smiling as she traced the scar on his face.
“Perhaps I should take you flying to compensate for the time apart. As I remember how badly you wanted that.” He offered and she smiled brightly at him.
“It will be an honour, my Prince.”
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alicerosejensen · 24 days
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I love your page so much omg. I‘m literally obsessed with your work😭🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Also I have this imagination in my mind going on about how Leon would try to help his girlfriend from recovering from her mental health issues since she’s always helping him. I was recently thinking about how he would react finding her not moving on the bathroom floor and trying to bring her back! I rewatched American horror stories and the scene with tate and violet in the first season episode 6 (ig?) is always in my head. I‘m still recovering from my past and my unhealthy habits and tbh recovery never felt better.
If this is too much for you or triggering please ignore this.🫶🏼❤️
I had a terrible period in my life when I was a few steps away from doing something like this in my life and unfortunately this shit often comes out. I'm not sure that such texts help me work through my psychological traumas, which were, in fact, inflicted on me and continue to be inflicted by close people who do not consider me a person, but at least such works help me to vent my pain, which I cannot permanently bury in myself.
I have been postponing this request for a long time because I was probably waiting for the right moment to write this text.
There are mentions of suicide, psychological trauma, severe self-doubt and anxiety, so if this is not acceptable to you, then please just block it.
Perhaps there is a similarity with my previous texts, but I am writing this with strong emotions now that I am trying to cope with it again.
the text is chaotic, I repeat, written while I was under the influence of strong heavy emotions. Maybe I'll delete it later, when my brain gets back to normal a little bit.
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If a songbird doesn't sing well, they wring its neck.
Maybe it was the costs of Leon's profession and the result of his constant missions, after which something human is gradually dying in him despite the constant struggle to save everyone. Raccoon City was supposed to teach, if not to survive, then make him begin to understand that some are doomed to die.
Leon Kennedy was taught not to offend, but to protect the weak, especially weak women. But it is difficult to calm the flow of disordered thoughts and put aside the fear that has seized him in order to clamp bloody wrists and apply something to them to stop the blood. Leon knew many strong women: Ada was perhaps the first among them, he did not know either her past or her real name, only the present that pushed their foreheads against each other; Claire, a fighting friend of misfortune that he met in that ill-fated city; Ashley, who turned from a baby eagle into a proud eagle; Angela Miller and others…
Your strength dissolves in the water, coloring it scarlet while your heart stubbornly still beats, let the rhythm noticeably shorten.
In truth, over the past few months it became clear that this was the only way out. When even your loved ones considered you an expired product and did not hesitate to remember this and remind you every time. In the end, their words turned into an obsessive worm that settled in your head, slowly day after day, month after month, devouring you and the circumstances seemed to be not in your favor. Instead of support, you somehow faced reproach, as if the universe was screaming that you were an wrong person, nature's mistake who had no right to live.
Escape attempts were doomed to failure. At first you tried to suppress it in yourself, helping Leon, because, in your opinion, he was the only one who had the right to complain about life, although he did not do this in front of you, because everyone said that you had no problems: you have everything limbs, there are no fatal diseases, all loved ones are healthy and there is a roof over your head, as if this is enough to not fall for nonsense and not walk around forever with a sad face.
This was the last time you shared your experiences. You didn’t even bother telling Leon, but everything inside was torn from constant pain. The feeling was as if you were being beaten by two extremes that led you to the edge of an abyss where you ultimately voluntarily jumped.
no, you really loved him, it was just other people’s words and your own speculation that convinced you, despite your strong relationship with him, that Leon would find someone better, someone more confident in himself, someone who would not be you because you had already missed the chance for a good life because it moved too slowly. Ultimately, a couple of sips of alcohol with sleeping pills and a sharp blade in his hands simply promised to correct the mistake in the form of you with your own hands.
You didn't have the courage to do it any other way.
But you really didn’t think that if you could try to open up to your loved one, you would meet support and not condemnation. Perhaps in a mad world he would be the only one who would heal your wounds as you healed him in your time. Leon clenched his teeth, feeling tears flowing down cheeks, seeing these crimson stains, when he pulled your body out of the bath, holding you close to him, repeating “I’m holding you. It's allright"
He so carefully laid you on his lap, managing to pull out a first aid kit and then bandages to tightly, albeit carelessly, wrap them around your wrist in order to somehow stop the bleeding. At least you were still breathing, thereby giving him hope that everything could still be fixed. the darkness and emptiness came to life, calling in a whisper to dissolve into eternal silence where there is no pain or condemnation. Your body will be in a grave under a gray stone, while the remains of your soul will float like a small grain of sand in infinity.
For Leon, everything happens in a fog; he tried more than once to save people, but he had no right to lose in this battle, even if you yourself surrendered to death. Shaking his head, brushing away the tears, he wrapped your body in a large terry towel, kissed your temple and picked you up, trying to somehow warm you, pressing you closer to him. the ability to provide first aid in the field and pull suicides out of the other world is not the same thing. Leon would have thanked God if he had believed in him, convinced that blood loss was the least of the evils that you had caused yourself, until he saw the remains of some substance at the bottom of the glass that stood on the table along with an almost full bottle of alcohol.
You really didn't give him a chance.
The ambulance took several minutes, which seemed like an eternity. In fact, Leon wasn't sure if it was worth trying to make you vomit when you'd already lost so much blood that it was already seeping through the bandages. Surely you would need a transfusion and Leon is ready to give you all his blood if only you would wake up. Holding his breath, he carefully looked at your chest, watching whether you were breathing and fortunately, your heart was still beating, slowly, but it was still fighting for life.
He stroked you on the head, kissed you, promised that he would take you somewhere else, quiet, where no one would dare to offend you, even if it was your family. You could have just asked him for help, just cuddled up to him and he would have protected you from other people’s attacks, but you preferred to remain silent. Kennedy was tired of waiting for the medical staff to let him in, although relatives should be allowed to see the patient first, but the position of a government agent sometimes had its advantages, and they concerned not only the high salary. When he was let in to you, it seemed to him that you had become half your size while you were lying on the bed, curled up under the blanket. It didn’t work out to pull off a beautiful suicide, which meant that soon angry relatives would come here with new sweat of bile especially for you. They won’t care about your feelings, but Leon sat down next to you, trying not to intrude too much into the space in which you imprisoned yourself, as if this blanket cocoon could be a separate world where you could hide. He spoke to you carefully, hating himself for not being able to understand in time what was wrong with your behavior; perhaps if he had been more attentive to you, the incident could have been avoided. You would see a psychotherapist, take a course of medication, and your environment would definitely be taken care of.
You cry, not letting him come to you, hating how you weren't just left to die and how much you hate this world. Hysteria after hysteria, nervous breakdown after nervous breakdown, in the hospital you repeatedly tried to commit suicide, but the attentive staff managed to prevent this before you inflicted fatal injuries on yourself, and if after some time Leon still managed to carefully break through your armor, then your loved ones This did not concern relatives in principle. You only allowed one person to visit you while you were undergoing psychological treatment and you behaved calmer and calmer, listening to the velvety words that soon all this would be behind you.
“We’ll go home soon,” Leon smiled, gently holding your hand and kissing your forehead, just glad that you’re alive, that you’re breathing and that your psycho-emotional state is slowly but improving. “You know, I have a surprise for you, I think you’ll like it when we get home.”
Soon what happened will become another nightmare in his life, a blessing with a good ending, but for the sake of this happy ending, Kennedy is ready to descend into hell at least every day.
You nod at him and smile a little, fearing that the gift is some kind of party on the occasion of your discharge. In fact, the last thing you want is to see someone’s faces, especially those who diligently hammered into your head how insignificant you are. Why do you even hope that the doctor will postpone your discharge, but the plans for your further treatment were completely different.
On the other hand, after taking antidepressants and psychological help in a special medical institution, how many men are ready to stay with their girlfriends who have been there for several months? For Leon, it seems this was not a significant problem, or he simply carefully did not show it. However, there were no parties, no calls, you simply returned now to his home where there were new interior items. it became somehow more comfortable... but something else surprised you.
Puppy. A small puppy of a couple of months old ran towards you and Leon to meet both of them, but stopped and began sniffing your shoes, while something thawed in your heart.
“Animals seem to help us well, They feel when we feel bad, it seems to me a good idea to get us a little companion,” Leon said quietly, stroking your back while you were busy with the puppy, rejoicing at the little living soul who will love you with the same pure and devoted love.
Ultimately it should have a happy ending too. Leon is ready to go to great lengths so that his beloved songbird starts smiling and singing happy songs again, even if it is necessary to remove other birds from her family who sleep and see how to pluck all her wings again.
You and he also have a chance for a happy ending.
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percheduphere · 5 months
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LET'S TALK ABOUT WHEN MOBIUS GETS EMOTIONALLY COMPROMISED
I rewatched S1 (in prep for a GIANT meta reviewing S1 and S2 together), and upon second viewing, I greatly appreciate the subtle and gradual progression of trust within Loki and Mobius' friendship. S1E2 is key to this. Tom and Owen's performances are impeccable because the energy between them changes scene by scene alongside the plotpoints.
From Mobius' end, I think I found the exact moment Mobius officially became emotionally compromised when it comes to Loki:
S1E2
The interaction that caused the final blow: 32:09 - 33:04
"Gentleman's bet? Let's play for pride."
"Let's go let's go let's go!"
"Extinction of the swallow? Is that a thing?"
"Got 'em!"
Racing against time cross-refrencing apocalypses with the presence of Kablooie. Spouting back and forth about their progress. Sassy remarks.
After a rocky start, they are now operating on the same mental wavelength. They're in rhythm. They are having so much fun together. They are smiling and laughing. Any moment in which a best friend is made feels exactly like this.
Not only was Loki right about his Apocalypse Theory, he also finds the exact date and location where Sylvie hides. Mobius is so proud of him! Look at these faces:
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But we don't see how smitten Mobius is until he's with Renslayer in the scene that immediately follows. Sure, Mobius is excited about getting close to catching Sylvie, but he's even more excited about how well he and Loki work together. It's incredibly sweet.
I couldn't find gifs of the exact dialogue I wanted, so I transcribed it like the obsessive fool that I am:
RENSLAYER: And this is all based on a theory from the variant who just blew your previous mission?
MOBIUS: Yeah, he's doing great!
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AND
MOBIUS: Come on. You don't usually see me this worked up, right? I'm exited! Im chomping at the bit!
When he says this, even Ravonna looks happy for him? I'm kind of sad, actually. You can tell in this scene that Ravonna and Mobius truly were close friends, once upon a time.
Then, they go to the locker room before deployment, and what does Mobius do?
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He's so happy he gives Loki his daggers (a symbol of love), likely knicked and saved for who knows how long, hidden from Renslayer because this love is precious and he will not give it up. (@northrnfool you put this so well in another post!)
S1E2 has so much to unpack. Every scene is so layered, yet efficient and economic in effectively in propelling emotion and plot. I can't wait to word vomit on the whole series. Please forgive me.
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grxmreaperx · 7 months
Note
MARK HOFFMAN LITERALLY ANYTHING PLS
You literally have no idea how happy I am that my first request is for Hoffman!! I’ve been rewatching the Saw series and I’m SO obsessed with this man
Untested
Pairing: Mark Hoffman x reader
Word count: 1.4k
Warnings: not many, slight angst. Mentions of blood and a couple of the traps. mentions of sex, but nothing explicit (this time
Summary: you and Mark are the only two Jigsaws left standing. John and Amanda were killed in Jeff’s game and Mark has made it clear that Jill is no longer welcome. You and the detective have grown close, working together to set up John’s so-called games and making sure Hoffman’s name stays out of the FBI’s mouths. You always warned him that Jigsaw lets no one go untested. He didn’t believe you until Jill received a box.
Takes place around Saw V/Saw VI. This might end up being a part of a longer piece, I’ve had a story in my head for a while, so if you guys like this I’ll start working on the longer work!!
“When’s your test, Detective?”
“I don’t need one.”
“You know John is going to test you at some point, right?”
Hoffman smirks. “And what makes you think that?”
You toss the screwdriver on the table, admiring, as John has coined it, “The Rack.”
“Amanda is right, John doesn’t let anyone go untested. She’s been tested. I’ve been tested. That leaves you, Detective.” You don’t allow yourself to look at him, instead admiring your handiwork in front of you.
He pulls his gloves off, shoving them into his pockets as he watches you. He knows you’re right. He hasn’t taken his life for granted, but neither had you. But here you were, a survivor of the game and one of the few people John trusts with his work.
“I just wish you’d let me help you. I can help you prepare, for whatever your test will be.” You finally look over, staring at him, examining his face for any sort of confirmation, confirmation that he’ll give in and let you do something for him.
He scoffs. “I’ll be fine, sweetheart. What, you worried about me or something?”
You cross your arms and stay silent. Normally you’re fine with the teasing, the back and forth, but not when his life could be at stake. Even if neither of you would say it aloud, but you cared for one another. You both had given into the tension months ago, developing a relationship that you both agreed, at the time, was nothing more than sex. But with every broken nose snapped back into place, every cut bandaged, and every casual touch, you both became more and more aware that this wasn’t true.
Your silence stabs at his chest. Softening ever so slightly, he says “Don’t worry, I can handle whatever the old man throws at me. I’ll be okay. I’ve set up enough of these things to know what I’m doing.”
Your sigh fills the room. “Whatever you say, Hoffman.”
“I’ll be right there.” He shuts his phone, jaw tense.
“Everything alright?” you ask from your seat in front of the monitors. You had both been watching as William Easton made his way through his game, blood in his wake.
“Yeah. Erikson says they have the Seth Baxter tape. Some specialist is analyzing the thing and they want me there.”
You feel your shoulders tense. After a moment of silence, all you can ask is “You need any backup?”
He smiles. “No, no. You stay here and run the game. Make sure everything goes smoothly. I’ll be alright. Be back as soon as I can.”
“Alright.”
He run a hand over your arm as he makes his way towards the door. You fix your eyes on the screen, steadying your breathing.
“Mark,” you say, as he steps over the threshold.
He looks back at you, eyes still on the screen.
“Be careful.”
You see his reflection on the screen nod, before closing the door behind him.
The third shot on the carousel went off when one of your security cameras went black. You sit up in the desk chair, poking at the keyboard, trying to get the feed back. Groaning, you hoist yourself up, grabbing a tool kit and your gun, and heading to the broken camera on the back of the building.
Your phone rings as you tinker with the faulty camera.
Hoffman.
Preparing yourself for the worst, you answer.
“Hello?”
“Hey, where are you? I’m back.”
“I’m out back, one of the cameras cut. All good?”
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll tell you about it when you get back in. But I’m fine. You good?”
A weight is lifted off of you. “Yeah, all good. Be in soon.”
He didn’t notice the note on the keyboard until his phone was flipped shut, trying to slow his heart rate. You didn’t put this here, did you? Where would you have gotten it? You knew about it, of course, but why would you put it here? You didn’t even know when he was coming back. You had been there when he had written it.
“Are you sure about this? Amanda is good at what she does, even if she is a bit hot headed. Just like someone else.”
“Yeah, I’m sure. This is our game, not hers. Once she’s out of the picture, it’ll just be you and me.”
His eyes darted around, trying to think of some explanation. He’d have to ask you when you came back in. He thought about going out to “help” you, even if he knew you didn’t need it, just to calm his nerves. He hated the idea of you out there by yourself, focused so intently on what you were doing that you wouldn’t notice someone coming up behind you through the darkness. Even though he would never admit it, he couldn’t wait for you to get back inside. His nerves were fried after the fire, and he needed to see you.
He was so lost in thought that, before he could react, he felt an electric shock pulse through his body.
As soon as you got the red light on the camera blinking again, your phone buzzes.
Hoffman.
Impatient, you thought, flipping the phone open.
���Hello, Detective.”
Nothing. Dial tone.
Your eyebrows furrow and you feel your breath hitch. You quickly dial him back, pressing the phone to your ear.
No answer.
Fuck. You leave the toolbox on the concrete, pulling your gun from the holster around your waist, and slowly make your way back inside.
You slink through the hallways back to the command center, listening for anything that tells you where he is, that he’s okay. That he’s alive.
Then you hear glass shatter.
You could’ve sworn you heard a car door slam shut outside, an engine starting, but you don’t care. You quickly make your way to the room, the window in the door shattered and –
The bear trap falling from the bars.
You throw the door open, and you suddenly forget how to breathe. Mark is one the floor, alive and bleeding, the side of his face torn to shreds.
You holster your gun, rushing over to him.
“What the fuck happened? Stay here, I have a kit in my car. Don’t move, and that’s not a suggestion.”
He nods slightly, breathing heavily through his nose.
You rush outside, hands fumbling with your car keys, pulling the door open and searching the glove box for your first aid kit.
When you get back inside, Mark has moved against the wall, head leaning back against the stone. You crouch down beside him, pulling out a clean needle and thread.
“I can do it,” he says through gritted teeth, reaching for the supplies.
You slap his hand away. “Shut up. You’re not doing this.” He sees your tense jaw, your eyes wide, and decides to listen.
Once you’ve stopped the bleeding and have at least half of his cheek sewn back up, your heart has stopped trying to escape from your chest and your hands have gotten steady again.
“Who did this?” you ask him, his face finally whole again.
“Jill Tuck.”
“What? Are you serious?”
The rage in his eyes gives you you’re answer. All you can do is nod. Jill motherfucking Tuck.
You start applying an antiseptic to his face, ignoring his insistence that he’s fine.
“So,” you start, breaking the silence. “Do you want me to say it now or later?”
His eyes meet yours, and he lets out an annoyed laugh. “Later, thank you.”
You can’t help but laugh, relieved and angry and fearful all at once.
I told you so, Hoffman.
“Cmon,” you say, grabbing his hand as he forces himself to stand. “Let’s get you home.”
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Text
Note: request by @bubblyabs! thank you so much!! I hope you'll like it!
Warnings: SKMD SPOILERS. fluff/smut 18+, a lot of fourth wall breaking and my infamous attempt at humor.
pairing: SKMD!Sihtric x Modern!You (f)
summary: The fictional man of your dreams was suddely not so fictional anymore.
wordcount: 5,2k
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'You looked really hot there.'
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There you were again, wrapped in a blanket on your couch, ready to once again finish another binge rewatch of The Last Kingdom. You just couldn't stop yourself. Ever since you became obsessed with the show, you could watch nothing else. No other series appealed to you anymore, and you kept going back to the very first episode, pathetically anticipating the second season, because that's where your favourite character comes in; Sihtric Kjartansson. The man needs no introduction, if we're honest. 
You don't know what exactly it is about him, but you were smitten. Each time he appeared on screen, you needed a glass of water and a cold shower afterwards.
You thought the actor who played him was cute too, you just couldn't really recall his name, you only remembered he had some complicated last name, Federsomething. However, cute or not, nothing was better than the rugged look of that pretty Danish rat boy in that medieval Netflix show. And so, only several weeks since your last rewatch, you were watching the movie again, which was the very last taste of the entire show you would ever get. Until they'll make some lousy remake in 10 years or something, which you would obviouslly not watch because you couldn't stand the thought of all those actors being replaced. Not on your watch.
Anyway, you had cried your absolute eyes out during the movie when you saw it the first time. But more importantly: whoever was responsible for Sihtric's haircut in the movie, was an actual blessing from the lord. Every time you saw his very first scene in that movie, where he walks up to Uhtred, with that long, loose hair, you simply just slide down your couch, being a whole hot mess. The things you would do to get that man in your bed, and the things you would do to him… oh, if only he wasn't fictional. You'd let him rail you, but alas.
And that made you groan each time. The most beautiful and perfect man you had ever seen was freaking fictional! It seems ridiculous, but Sihtric just ticked all your boxes.
He was funny, brave, loyal, adorable, hot, sexy, maybe not the smartest but you had no problem taking care of that man, he was good with weapons, he was protective and a real family man. What else could a you possibly want? You cursed Bernard Cornwell for coming up with the character and whoever casted that actor, as they are clearly responsible for you being forever single. Because you would never settle for anyone who was not Sihtric Kjartansson; fictional character and the goddamn love of your life.
And just like two weeks ago, you finished the movie and switched off your tv, while being a sobbing, snotty mess once again. Your three week holiday had just started, and your initial plan was to stay up late each night, but you had a headache from crying, so you decided to go to bed when it wasn't even close to midnight.
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The next morning you woke up early because of some loud banging. You figured the toddlers of your upstairs neighbours were at it again, banging their fists on the wall, running through their apartment. You could hear their little gremlin claws stomp and scratch everywhere they went. But you had to admit, they were louder than usual today, and it actually sounded like they were kicking and stomping at your front door.
You groaned and got dressed for another day of simply doing nothing. You started your coffee machine and opened the door to your little hallway, which led through the front door. You hadn't checked for any mail downstairs in a few days, and it was time to leave your cave for that little adventure to the main hall of your apartment building.
But you would not get there, at least, not any time soon. No. You were about to get the biggest jump scare of your life, to which you would scream so loud, it would without a doubt wake up the entire city. And after that, everything would turn black in front of your eyes.
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During your unconscious state you had the weirdest dream. You had opened the door to your hallway and found the cause of that weird banging noise. The noise came from your own apartment. The noise was created by a man, kicking at, and rattling your door, in a pathetic attempt to open it. And it wasn't just any man. 
You recognised him from the back within a split second. It was the fictional man of your dreams, dressed in the red-brownish leather armour he wore when you last saw him on your tv, his hair braided and his face bloody and bewildered. You screamed so loud when you saw him, that someone probably called the cops, because it was a horrible, distressing sound. And it also scared the hell out of Sihtric, who turned to face you while reaching for the hilt of his sword as he stepped closer. But after a second, his expression changed from anger to astonishment, and he stared at you, all confused and wide-eyed. You stared into his mismatched eyes as he was merely two paces away from you. 
'Lady?' he said, with the voice and accent that simply set your body on fire whenever you heard it. 
And you randomly thought how Sihtric looked taller on tv than he did in real life, in your hallway, and then everything just turned black.
And it turned out that it wasn't a dream. But it all had actually happened before you passed out, in your hallway. Sihtric had been quick to catch your fall and caught you in his arms. While still completely confused, and in shock, he had carried you into your living room and carefully laid you down on your couch. And as it would take a good five minutes before you regained consciousness again, Sihtric took a quick look around your apartment, growing more confused and concerned with every passing second.
And you suddenly opened your eyes again as he had his back turned to you.
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You blinked rapidly, your eyes trying to focus on the backside of the man in armour, which you recognised all too well. It hadn't been a dream, it all actually happened. And it was still happening apparently. How the fuck was this possible? Did someone prank you? Did someone pay a ridiculous amount of money to hire the actual actor, just to scare the shit out of you and to mess with you? Breaking your heart in the process as you could never be with the man of your dreams? What a sick joke.
While that medieval looking hunk stared at your family pictures, you quietly took your phone from your pocket and opened instagram. Your eyes grew wide when you saw that the actual actor, who you knew played Sihtric in the show, had posted a story just a minute ago, announcing that he was currently in some country, far away from yours, at a comic con.
'No way,' you whispered, 'but then who the fuck-', you looked back at Sihtric again, who had made his way over to your Last Kingdom book collection. 
He stared at it, but as you couldn't see his face, you had no idea what he was doing because you remembered he shouldn't be able to read. You followed his movements with huge eyes, completely in shock, and without realising it, your phone slipped out of your hands and dropped on the floor with a loud thump. You spooked Sihtric, who slightly jumped, and was quick to turn around, again ready to draw his sword.
'Where am I?' he asked, trying to sound calm.
'W-what… uh, England?'
'England?' 
'E-England,' you said again.
'What is the year, lady?'
'2024.'
'What?'
'No, sorry! Sorry, I- I mean 2023!'
Sihtric stared at you, and you thought if he wouldn't blink soon, his eyes would dry out.
'H-how did you get here?' you asked.
'How did you get here?' he asked cautiously.
'I… live here?' you frowned.
'Why?'
You blinked. 'Because… I… pay to live here?'
'Oh,' Sihtric said, then nodded, 'that seems fair. What is that?' he asked, pointing to your tv.
'It's a t- uhh,' you figured that if for some reason this really was Sihtric, the medieval dude from your favourite tv show, he would not know what a tv is, so for the sake of playing it safe, you lied, 'it's a… art.'
'Art?'
'Yes, like a drawing,' you panicked.
Sihtric looked at the tv, then back at you, and said, 'but it's all black?'
'Well, it's… modern… art? It's really expensive,' you said, hoping he would not try to break your tv for whatever reason.
'Expensive?'
'Yes,' you said, 'it's, uh, over a six hundred poun- pieces of silver.'
Sihtric looked back at your tv again, scratched his forehead, and then locked eyes with you again, 'Lady,' he snickered, 'I think someone has fooled you. That drawing is not worth that amount of silver.'
You smiled, simply agreeing, while anticipating his next move.
'Is that,' he squinted his eyes and walked over to your kitchen, 'Uhtred?' he frowned, looking at your coffee cup which had a picture of Uhtred's face on it, 'why?' Sihtric asked as he looked back at you.
'I, uhh…' were you going to tell him they didn't have a cup with his face on it, and that you had sent an angry email to the company? Maybe not. You cleared your throat, but before you could speak, Sihtric's eyes found the large framed poster of him, Finan and Uhtred on your wall. And his eyes grew wide. 
'Where did you get that? Why am I… why are… wh-,' Sihtric stopped talking, then eventually said, 'who made this painting?'
'... Google?' 
'Who is Google?'
'It's, well, so,' you stammered.
'You paid six hundred pieces of silver for this too?'
'Wha- no, more like…seven.'
'Seven hundred?' Sihtric gasped, 'lady,' he smiled, clearly flattered.
'No! I mean like seven pou- bloody pieces of silver!'
'Seven?' he frowned, suddenly offended, 'only seven? Yet you paid six hundred for that?' he pointed at your tv.
'Sihtric, look,' you sighed.
'How do you know my name?' he asked, frightened.
Okay. This had to stop, right now. What the fuck is going on? 
You told Sihtric to shut up, a little harsher than you really meant, but so be it. You took his hands and sat him down on your couch. For some reason he kept holding your hands, which you obviously didn't mind, and you tried to explain how you knew who he was while desperately not trying to get distracted by his appearance. Those tattooed fingers, the tattoo on his neck, and all those scars. He was even more handsome in real life. If this was real life, of course.
'You… you have seen my life?' Sihtric frowned, 'on… the black painting?'
'Yes, it's called a tv. Here, I can show you,' you took the remote, and Sihtric gasped when he suddenly heard noise and saw moving images on the previously black screen.
'Sorcery,' he whispered with big eyes, squeezing your hand.
'No, not sorcery,' you said, remembering how awfully superstitious he was in season 3. And how cute he looked in season 3. Well, he was cute in every season.
'The… the people,' Sihtric suddenly said, 'are they s-stuck?'
'Stuck?'
'Are they stuck in the painting?' he asked, concerned.
'What? No… no, it's… oh god,' you sighed, 'the people are fine,' you smiled.
You quickly switched on Seven Kings Must Die, and you thought Sihtric was going to pass out. He jumped up when he saw Finan and Ingrith, near the beginning of the movie, in Uhtred's hall, your favourite scene, and he ran to the tv.
'Finan!' Sihtric yelled, 'is he stuck?' he looked back at you, worried, 'can he… can he hear me?'
Sihtric turned to the tv again and pressed his fingers against the screen.
'No! Don't touch the screen!' you yelled, worried he'd damage it with his rough fingers, and Sihtric was quick to pull his hand back with a flinch. And you felt horrible for making him flinch, but before you could apologise, Sihtric had composed himself again.
'But… F-Finan?' he asked, 'is he okay? Where is he?'
'Finan is fine! He's not stuck! This all already happened… right?' you grimaced, hoping you were right somehow.
Sihtric looked at you, confused, then back to the screen, and he stumbled backwards when he saw his own face appear on the magic painting. He watched the scene unfold, and he didn't know what to say, he just stared at the screen as he reached for your hand again.
'You looked really hot there,' you blurted out, and you felt yourself blush.
'Hot?' Sihtric frowned, 'I wasn't hot, lady. It was a cold night! Can't you see the furs?' he scoffed.
'No, I mean, you- … no, you're right. It must've been… really cold that day.'
'It was,' Sihtric said sternly, and looked back at the screen again, 'I remember this,' he gasped, 'Finan said he only fell asleep once,' he said, just seconds before Finan said the line on tv.
'See!' Sihtric gasped and looked at you again, 'he actually has fallen asleep many times, lady,' he grinned.
Holy fuck. You didn't even think about that. Sihtric obviously knew everything that had happened, the whole story, not just the bits and pieces you saw from their lives on tv.
'H-has he?' you asked, cautiously.
'Yes, lady,' Sihtric said, 'it often happened because he had too much ale the night before. And because he's old,' he winked with a grin.
'Oh,' you snickered, 'I see. And… you never fell asleep?'
'Me? no, never,' he said with confidence.
'Are you sure?'
'Yes, lady.'
You hummed and skipped to the scene where both Finan and Sihtric had fallen asleep, while Uhtred was awake.
'So…' you smiled, pointing at the tv.
Sihtric gasped, 'No, that… see! See, I'm awake. I was merely resting my eyes, I was… in deep thought,' he lied.
'Okay,' you laughed, 'if you say so.'
You watched Sihtric's face, which went from mildly ashamed to a light chuckle, and soon he laughed softly along with you. He still had no idea how it was possible that he could see his own face on your expensive painting, but Sihtric was a simple guy; he saw a pretty lady and he was smitten, not caring about much else anymore, except for winning your heart. He clearly didn't know you were basically ready to marry him on the spot. And for some reason you both just seemed to accept the situation, no questions asked. You watched the rest of the movie together, and it was surreal. Sihtric remembered everything, told you little anecdotes and simply seemed to enjoy seeing his friends on your screen.
'So… did Uhtred die?' you asked when the end credits were shown on screen.
'Uhtred died?!' Sihtric gasped.
'What? No, I mean, I'm asking you!'
'Uhtred was alive when I last saw him!' Sihtric said, and so you found out Sihtric had ended up in your world only hours after that heartbreaking last scene in the movie.
'Okay, then I'm sure he's, uh, fine,' you tried to convince yourself as much as you tried to convince Sihtric. 'Also,' you cleared your throat, 'what happened to your wife and kids?'
'Oh,' he said, 'we had a rough divorce. She broke my heart and took the kids,' he shrugged.
'Oh,' you blinked, surprised, 'I'm… sorry?'
'Are you married?' Sihtric blurted out.
'Uh, me?' you chuckled, twirling your hair, looking the handsome Dane up and down, 'n-no, I'm not. Why?' you kicked your feet.
Sihtric stared at you, he just couldn't believe his luck after being strangely teleported into a different year and world, ending up with a beautiful lady who wasn't married. But then he thought that was odd, because why weren't you married yet? A pretty lady who was clearly rich, at least that's what he thought, who lived in a nice home, was of marriage age, who was also very kind and funny, and with a body which he would undoubtedly be thinking of later that night. Why has no one married you yet, he wondered.
'Are you cursed?' he said without thinking.
'What?'
'Cursed,' he said again, 'you're not married. Why?'
'Uh, well,' you cleared your throat, 'I'm… picky.'
Sure, picky. You were simply in love with the medieval, fictional man on your couch, and you would never settle for anything less. 
'Picky?' Sihtric frowned.
'Yes,' you replied, 'only a certain kind of man could win my heart,' you grinned, mindlessly twirling your hair around your fingers again.
'Oh?' Sihtric raised an eyebrow and smirked, clearly intrigued.
And he thought of it as a game now, a game he desperately wanted to play, because he wanted to know if he could win. And gods, how he wanted to win you and take you back home with him. Or stay here with you, he really didn't care, not after you just batted your eyelashes at him. No, he would do everything for you now.
'So,' he cleared his throat, shifting a little closer next to you on the couch, 'what kind of man would that be?'
'Hm,' you hummed, thinking as if you weren't looking at that specific man, 'a man who is… kind,' you said, 'loyal and brave,' you smiled at him.
Sihtric hummed and licked his lips as he gave you a playful look. He knew he was kind, loyal and brave, so he figured his chances with you were pretty good right now.
'And… someone who is not afraid to take charge,' you teased, seeing if he's willing to take the bait.
Sihtric grinned and slightly adjusted his position.
'He also has to be protective,' you said, 'and strong,' your eyes trailed down to his clothed biceps, knowing very well what's underneath all of that fabric he was wearing.
'Well,' Sihtric smiled, a little cocky, 'I might just be the man for you then.'
'You think so? I'm not sure…,' you played it cool, but inside you were going stark raving mad, this surely had to be a dream.
'I think I am,' he gave you a smirk and winked.
You were absolutely ready to pull that man in your bed, but it was only noon, you had just met him a few hours ago, and everything was just really freaking weird. So you held back. You told him you'd think about it, to which he frowned, playfully offended. You bickered a little and eventually ended up discussing what on earth you two were going to do now. He had nowhere to go, and you didn't want to kick him out, but he was still a stranger. Even though he had lived in your head rent free for years already. You told him first things first; he had to get into different clothes. Which he agreed to. You did some digging and found some sweatpants you had bought online years ago, which turned out way too big for you, and you had forgotten to return it, which came in handy now. Unfortunately, the sweatpants were pastel pink, and Sihtric clenched his jaw, exhaling sharply as he grabbed them out of your hands. You snorted, and to make it worse, the only thing you owned which he would possibly fit in, was a matching sleeveless crop top.
'No,' Sihtric said sternly, looking at the top you held in your hands.
'Guess you're not brave enough for me then,' you taunted.
Sihtric huffed and snatched the shirt out of your hands. You pointed him towards your bathroom, where he stayed for quite a while, simply admiring every foreign object before he even thought of changing clothes. And when he finally walked out, you thought you were going to pass out again.
He had untangled his previously braided hair, wearing it down now, which you loved so much, all while wearing that sleeveless crop top, which barely covered half of his insanely toned upper body. And the matching sweatpants hung on his hips, low enough to reveal he wasn't wearing any underwear, which made sense, as you had no underwear that would possibly fit him. 
He raked his fingers through his hair, exposing even more of his trained torso when he did, and every single filthy thought you ever had about that man crossed your mind at once. You desperately tried to shake your thoughts and took him back into your living room, where you sat down and simply talked. He wanted to know all about you, and even though he didn't understand a lot of the things you mentioned, he knew he was going to marry you. Somehow.
Later you made him dinner and as promised, Sihtric slept on the couch. And you had to fight the desperate urge to find him in the night and lure him into your bed, which Sihtric would have gladly allowed to happen.
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A few days passed and Sihtric seemed to adapt decently. He was not as dumb as Uhtred and Finan always made him seem, but he was definitely as clumsy as expected. Knocking over drinks, breaking small objects which he wanted to look at but his hands were too rough, things like that. But you couldn't give a shit, you were madly in love with him, and you couldn't wait for him to break you-... your bed.
Sihtric was very flirty too, and loved brushing his fingers over your face, arms, or well, anywhere he could really, whenever he could. But he was also a true gentleman, and slept on your couch each night, for nearly a week. 
One evening he asked if he could see one of those Last Kingdom episodes you had talked about, and you agreed.
It was still unreal to watch an episode with the one and only Sihtric Kjartansson next to you, and it still felt like a dream. You switched on a random episode, and it happened to be the one where his father, Kjartan, ends up getting killed. At first Sihtric had been watching in awe, amazed that he could relive parts of his life like that.
But when he realised where it was going, his face became more and more deprived of emotions. You noticed it quite late and wanted to switch the tv off once you saw it, just before Kjartan got killed, but Sihtric stopped you by taking your hand in his. And he held your hand tightly as he watched the scene unfold. He showed no emotion, which told you he was more or less at peace with it, but it still was a rough moment to sit through.
When the episode was over, Sihtric looked at you, and you could finally do what you had always wanted to do after seeing Sihtric in that terrible scene; you pulled him in your arms and held him tight.
'Are you okay?' you asked after a moment.
'Yeah,' he said quietly, enjoying the feeling of having his arms around you.
He softly hummed as you brushed your fingers through his long, wavy hair, which was simply another dream come true, and he held you tightly for a long time.
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'Can I stay with you?' Sihtric suddenly asked a few evenings later as you had just watched another episode.
'What?' you asked.
'Can I stay here? With you? I mean… I- I like you. I like being here,' he said, 'and, unless we find out how I got here, I have nowhere to go.'
'Y-you want to stay here? With me?' you frowned. 
Sihtric wasn't wrong, he truly had no place to go and you also still had no idea how on earth he had gotten here, which you both quickly stopped questioning as it drove you mad. And naturally you wanted him to stay, but it would be a hard thing to explain to your friends and family, who knew all about your (unhealthy) love for Sihtric, who was, until last week, non-existent in the real world.
'I'd like to stay,' Sihtric smiled sweetly at you, 'with you, lady.'
And you just couldn't resist him anymore. With his long, wavy hair, those mismatched eyes, that smile, and the pink crop top he kept wearing once he realised you liked it on him. He did swap the pastel sweatpants for a black one, after you had bought it for him a few days ago. He was simply the most mesmerising man you had ever seen, and before you knew it, your lips crashed together into a heated kiss. And you tore each other's clothes off as fast as you could. You've been waiting years for this dream to become a reality, and you absolutely would live your fantasy to the fullest right now.
Sihtric seemed just as desperate as you, but before he pulled your panties down, you ran to your bedroom. He was still a medieval man, who knows what he caught in those days and you wanted to limit the risk of catching something as much as you could, and also you did not want a baby, yet, so you grabbed a condom. Sihtric frowned at the package, and you quickly understood he had never seen such a thing. You chuckled a little awkwardly and opened the package.
'It's protection,' you explained, but you didn't want to spook him by talking about STDs, knowing he would probably think it's a curse, so you simply said, 'it's so you don't put a child- I mean, pup in my belly,' you frowned a little as you said the ancient words.
'You do not want my pups?' Sihtric asked, and he almost sounded hurt.
'N… I… well,' you cleared your throat, 'not yet,' you admitted.
Sihtric started to ramble and question you, and you politely asked him to stop talking. You asked if he was okay with everything, to which he then nodded with a smirk, and he allowed you to put the condom on him. And the low hums he let out when you did so, were enough to turn your insides into jelly, and the pressure between your thighs was immense and unbearable. And as you wanted to take your hands off him, he quickly held onto your arm, keeping your hand in place.
'Please,' Sihtric said with big, darkened eyes and a sly smile.
And you understood he seemed to like the feeling of your hand working his length. You had to admit, all those fanfic writers did not lie about his size; you had nothing to complain about here. God, the way you enjoyed having this man on your couch, completely naked, except for the Mjölnir pendant around his neck, with his head thrown back as he smiled while soft moans escaped his slightly parted lips, enjoying the way you made him feel. And it didn't take long before Sihtric came, and the sound of his low groan was pure bliss to your ears, and even more arousing than you already had expected it to be. 
After a short moment, Sihtric was quick to push you up and make you sit back against the couch. He kneeled down in front of you, on the floor, and he carefully spread your legs with a smirk. He threw one leg over his broad shoulder, and before you could grasp that your wildest fantasy was coming true, his face was already buried between your thighs. He nipped your sensitive skin with his lips before he softly kissed your wet folds, followed by running his tongue over your core, making you exhale sharply as your hands found his hair. Your body trembled in no time as he sucked, kissed and licked your clit, as if you were the most delicious thing he had ever tasted in his life. And just like Sihtric, it didn't take long before you came with a desperate moan, pulling his hair to which he groaned.
You both ended up laughing softly as Sihtric sat back next to you, giving you some time to recover, while you both realised how insane this was. But in less than a minute he already took your face in his hands and pulled you closer, wanting to kiss you like there was no tomorrow. And as soon as you felt like you could take him again, you climbed on his lap, to which Sihtric smirked. He watched you with half open eyes as he bit down on his lip. His hands settled on your hips while yours found support by holding onto his muscular shoulders. His body was even more impressive than you imagined, and you cursed Netflix for never giving the audience a shirtless Sihtric scene. 
And then you finally sank down on his cock, you both gasped at the feeling, hands desperately squeezing and scratching each other to display pleasure. And Sihtric was vocal, moaning and cursing with a smile as he enjoyed the way you were riding him, his eyes fixated on you, darting between your eyes, your lips, your breasts and down to your core, loving the view of how you took his length.
'Gods,' he moaned, out of breath, and then he hummed with a light chuckle.
'Fuck,' you muttered under your breath, digging your nails in his shoulders as you tried your hardest to not finish right there and then.
'Hm, I want to fill you up,' Sihtric whispered with ragged breath, and your attempt to not finish before him was to no avail, as his words were enough to make you cry out his name while your walls clenched around his throbbing cock.
'Fuck, sorry,' you said, panting, riding out your own high while feeling a little embarrassed you finished so fast. 
But to your surprise, and pleasure, you felt Sihtric's grip on your hips tighten up and he let out another hard, deep groan as he threw his head back, finishing only moments after you, just as he had hoped he would. You both tried to catch your breath as you embraced each other for a little while. Then you took a shower together and dressed in some comfy clothes. You grabbed a few drinks and some snacks, and made your way into your bedroom, telling Sihtric to come with you. And on your bed, you'd talk and joke around for hours, if you weren't too busy kissing each other or cuddling that is.
'If you had the chance,' you asked, hours later, as Sihtric held you in his arms, 'would you go back home?'
'Only if you'd go back with me,' he said, without any hesitation or doubt, and he squeezed you a little tighter against his chest, 'but if you wish to stay here, then I will stay here, even if I could go back.'
'Why?' you asked, surprised but happy to hear his answer, and you felt a little emotional all of the sudden.
'Because,' Sihtric smiled, moving up a little to look into your eyes, 'because I like you,' he lovingly brushed his fingers over your cheek, 'I have lived my life there, back home,' he said, 'there's not much there for me anymore. I would rather stay here and have you, have someone to take care of and to provide for, then going back without you and just… feel alone again at night.'
'I love you,' you suddenly blurted out.
Sihtric's jaw dropped slightly as he looked at you with big eyes, and then he smiled softly, 'I love you too,' he said, 'and I just want to be wherever you are.'
'Sihtric,' you whispered, cupping his cheeks as you stared into the warrior's vulnerable eyes, 'I will simply follow you anywhere you decide to go.'
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destiel-wings · 2 months
Note
I hope you don't mind me asking, but what are your thoughts on angel x buffy? :)
Hii i don't mind, thank you for asking 😊
So, I used to love bangel sooooo much when i first watched the show. I was 100% into it, (with a crush for Boreanaz too) and i cried so much for them in s2 and when Angel left the show in s3. And I truly, sincerely, unironically hated Spike too (I thought he was a great character but i just loved hating him, you know? Lol). When we saw Spike's dream of kissing Buffy I swear i felt nauseous.
... and then they aired Fool for love.
By the end of that episode I was left in utter existential crisis in front of my tv because i felt my whole world shift. There was a part of me that still liked Angel and Buffy, but there was also this new part that wanted her to be with Spike now.
So anyway, that's when i decided to switch teams and i became team spuffy, and for as much as i had been obsessed with bangel before, it was nothing compared to how deep i was caught into the Buffy and Spike relationship. I never looked back. They were just much more complex and real and compelling. And it made me reevaluate Angel and her relationship with him too. Angel never really knew Buffy, always treated her like a child, and let's be honest--and that's something that hit me only years later when I got older--she was a child when they were together. He was spying on her and falling in love with her when she was just fifteen years old and he was a 240-year-old vampire who had been sired at like 26 years old, and they got together when she was 16/17 and he broke up with her when she turned 18... I don't think that's something the writers did intentionally of course, because (as everything else in buffy) it's just meant to be taken as a metaphor for the ideals and struggles and the intensity of drama of a girl's first love, but it still comes off as icky.
And before anyone comes at me, I know spuffy isn't healthy either, but that's kinda the point and the appeal. First of all, it's fiction and a metaphor, and secondly, it's about two broken people that are supposed to be mortal enemies but are actually two sides of the same coin, so different and yet so much the same, who can understand each other as a whole, light and darkness, in a way that no one else ever could, who yes, hurt each other along the way, but whose love saved them from the deepest darkness, ultimately bringing them into the light.
This is what spuffy is to me, and this is why i think it's not only the superior ship, but one of the best ships of all time (thee best, until i saw destiel, now they're sharing the podium).
So anyway, to get back to your question, the moment i became obsessed with Buffy and Spike (and i have been ever since 2005, lmao, they've been my first real obsession, alongside btvs, until spn and destiel) Angel sort of became the enemy 😅. And I hated him so so so so so much when he appeared in 7x21 and kissed Buffy (pure fanservice, but okay) and brought the medallion that ultimately killed Spike. So i spent years very maturely holding my vendetta against Angel (like, rooting for every demon that fought against him when I watched Angel, lmaoo). In most recent years, I've (sort of) made my peace with the character, after rewatching Angel. I mean he's still the enemy (of course, duh!! Who am i if not eternally petty??) but i appreciate him in his own show.
So i don't ship Angel and Buffy anymore, but I can understand why someone would (as i myself used to), and more importantly, i respect other people's right to ship them.
If we're joking, I'm going to insult Angel and keep saying he's the enemy. But on a mature serious note, I think Buffy and Angel were a great first love (for Buffy), but they were supposed to be just that, the impossible teenage girl's dream of a first love, eternal but doomed to end and break your heart.
I think Angel was much more well paired with Cordelia (which is something I'd never think I'd say), and i found myself shipping them so much when I rewatched the show. It felt so much more mature and profound than what we saw with Buffy and Angel (and that's probably due to the fact that we got slow burn for them - as we did for Buffy and Spike- and could actually see the feelings growing, while Buffy crushed on Angel in the pilot and she was madly in love (as teenagers do) in 0.5 seconds for no apparent reason than the fact that he was hot and mysterious.
So when I say the kiss in btvs 7x21 makes zero sense, I'm not just talking about spuffy, but also about cangel. I feel like both characters parted ways and lived on in their own shows to grow and become their own persons, developing other relationships that were more adult and meaningful, and that kiss was just disrespectful for both (but anyways, it doesn't change anything).
I have so many thoughts about all this honestly, and I hope I haven't gone too much off the tangent with my reply, but i couldn't just give you a simple reply because that would've had to be something like "angel is the enemy and i don't like bangel" but as you can see my thoughts are a little more complex than that 😅
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keerysfreckles · 3 months
Text
august — cam cameron
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pairing: cam cameron x fem!reader
summary: y/n has a summer job at the cousins bakery. cam cameron likes to find excuses to buy muffins every day.
warnings: none? just a long fic (i got carried away oopsies)
a/n: already rewatching tsitp and i finished it this week I LOVE IT SO MUCH FJSHJDHSH
masterlist !
⋆ ˚。 ⋆ ୨୧ ˚
cousins beach was so surreal in the summertime. it was the busiest time of the year for the small town. the beaches were crowded and the boardwalk never slept.
everyone practically knew everyone. that's what y/n might have loved most about it. besides her close friend isabel conklin of course.
the girls met in the summer of 2017 when y/n's family started driving three hours to their newly bought beach house. it was in the same neighborhood as the beck house, meaning y/n and belly quickly became friends. belly always invited y/n over, and grew fondly of conrad and jeremiah fisher. she eventually learned to enjoy steven's presence as well.
the two girls have been inseparable since. every summer you'd find them attached at the hip, with conrad, jeremiah and steven following behind.
this summer however was different. not for belly though, she was still just as obsessed with the older fisher brother. the summer was already different for y/n. her father made the decision for the girl to get a summer job. her mother wasn't too thrilled with the idea, just wanting her daughter to have a memorable summer. but after officially getting hired at the local bakery, y/n didn't mind.
she's always loved going to the bakery. it was almost tradition for her mother to buy a pie to bring to susannah's fourth of july parties. y/n always begged for the double chocolate chip muffins before they left at the beginning of august. nine out of ten times she left with a smile on her face and a muffin in her hands.
the first week of work went smoothly for y/n. belly stopped by everyday to check on her. jeremiah went with her one morning for a muffin run, and conrad went with her once to buy chocolate chip cookies to cheer up a very upset steven.
two new faces came into the bakery with belly and the fisher brothers. conrad and jeremiah immediately went to the small stand with different flavors of cupcakes. belly walked up to the counter, with the two newcomers trailing behind her.
"hey bells," y/n smiles, leaning against the cold counter.
"hi," she smiles back, "i just had to bring everyone here for the best muffins in the whole wide world."
belly gestures to the two friends behind her. the girl to her right has dirty blonde hair, with thick mascara covering her eyelashes.
"this is taylor," taylor waves.
the boy to her left has brown curly hair, with darker skin than belly's, and y/n can't help but smile when be does.
"and this is cam," belly pushes him forward a bit.
"it's cam cameron actually!" jeremiah interrupts from the other side of the small store.
y/n can't help bit giggle, "cam cameron?"
"yeah, cam or uh- cameron works just as well."
y/n sends him one last smile before turning back towards belly, "so i'm guessing you didn't just come in here to chat?"
belly shakes her head and gives y/n the muffin order, including steven's request who was busy with his summer job at the pool as a server.
y/n was quick to pack the 7 muffins in a box before handing them to belly. she walked over to conrad after paying, with taylor following behind. cam sent a wave to y/n, which she happily reciprocated, before watching them walk out of the store.
the next day at the bakery was quite boring for y/n. an older couple came in and ordered a cake, and a family of four ordered a dozen muffins. y/n was in the middle of cleaning and rewriting on one of the chalkboards on the wall when the bell above the door rang.
"oh hey cam cameron!" y/n turned to see the curly headed boy from yesterday.
he smiled at the name, not hating it when it came out of her mouth.
"what can i do for you?" she sets down the chalk and walks behind the counter. cam follows as he stands on the opposite side.
he gives her his order, which was one blueberry muffin for himself to enjoy. she slides the small bag across the counter, but cam doesn't want to leave the store just yet.
"seeing as you're not busy," cam chuckles as he looks around the store, "do you mind if i keep you company?"
y/n instantly shakes her head, "no, no not at all. i'd actually love that today. it's been so slow."
cam nods, "yeah i saw the boardwalk was pretty busy on the way over here."
the pair talked for over an hour, when to both of them it only felt like ten minutes. y/n couldn't keep her smile off her face when he was around.
cam pauses in the middle of his story when his phone buzzes from his pocket. "shoot," he sighs, "my mom wants me home for lunch."
cam grabs his bag before walking towards the door, "i'll see you!"
y/n smiles and waves, "bye cam cameron."
for the rest of her shift y/n couldn't stop thinking about cam. their conversation earlier ranged from their favorite foods, to cam's love for marine biology, and even to y/n's hidden talent of being a boss at karaoke (belly's words, not hers.)
a week had passed and cam stopped by the bakery every day. his order varied from muffins, to cupcakes, to cookies. cam accidentally admitted to the girl he visited her to keep her company. it absolutely warmed her heart and a giggle fell from her lips.
y/n practically skipped out of the bakery and towards her yellow bike. she knew she'd call belly as soon as she got home to tell her what happened with cam today.
the phone rang once, then twice, then belly answered.
"hi y/n! what's up?"
"i may need some girl advice bells."
"i'm sorry?" belly's instantly confused by y/n's words.
y/n groans, not knowing how to word her feelings, "can you just come over? it'll be easier to explain."
not even five minutes after hanging up, belly's knocking on the pale blue door of y/n's parent's beach house.
"cam cameron asked me on a date," y/n was quick to the point once the two girls got to her room.
belly squealed, before asking a million questions. y/n happily answered them all, knowing belly was truly excited for her.
y/n explained to belly that cam asked her right before she left to go home after her shift at the bakery. the sun was setting, and cam was worried he'd miss her if he didn't jog the second half of the route from his house towards the bakery. she found it cute as he seemed more nervous around her today than any other day last week.
cam took a deep breath before asking y/n if she wanted to go to the boardwalk with him. with a bright smile the girl agreed.
which leads to her predicament, of not knowing weather or not cam cameron meant it as a date or not.
"he asked you personally, so obviously it's a date y/n," belly was looking through y/n's closet as the ladder layed on her unmade bed.
"but what if he just sees it as two friends hanging out?" y/n rebuttals.
belly doesn't answer, but instead she comes out with a navy blue corset type of tank top, and grabs the pair of shorts she found in y/n's dresser moments ago.
she holds the articles of clothing together, "because how can he see you as a friend if he sees you in this!"
both girls fall into a fit of giggles before you eventually get ready. y/n still had thirty minutes or so until cam was picking her up, so belly insisted on helping with the rest of the look.
she kept her hair natural, from it already being styled for work earlier in the day. she threw all her jewelry back on, considering she can't wear any at work. y/n always wore two necklaces, five rings (three on her left hand, two on the right), and a handful of bracelets adorned both her wrists.
belly helped with her mascara and lip gloss.
with one last look in her mirror, y/n and belly both giggled as a knock echoed through the whole house.
cam cameron was never speechless, but when he saw y/n standing in front of him words weren't even a thought.
"hi cam," she giggles.
"hey- hey y/n, you look great."
belly not-so-subtley squeezes her way between y/n and the door, greeting cam before she ran back to her own house.
cam and y/n started walking towards the boardwalk. the sun was still in the phase of setting. hues of orange, yellow and pink filled the sky with a couple of clouds.
the walk to the boardwalk wasn't the shortest, but y/n loved the amount of time she's able to spend with cam. they didn't stop talking the whole way there.
cam observed the girl, and noticed the small wrinkles around y/n's eyes when she laughed. he saw her fiddle with the ring on her thumb when she listened to him talk. he loved how excited she got talking about all her favorite rides at the boardwalk.
y/n wasn't the observant type, but cam was the only exception. her heart sped up when his smile got bigger as he talked about marine biology. he loved everything about whales. she noticed during the week, when he got nervous he runs his hand through his hair. he does the same motion as the two finally walk into the buzzing atmosphere of the boardwalk.
"so, what do you want to do first?" cam politely asks.
y/n can't help but giggle again, before grabbing onto his hand, "i have an idea." she simply grabs cam's hand and pulls him towards one of the many games.
y/n never thought her favorite night of summer would be with a boy she just met this year.
her and cam played almost every game on the boardwalk. y/n won most of them, but when cam beat her at ring toss, he gave her the purple stuffed giraffe, which she didn't dare loosen her grip on it for the rest of the night.
after games, the two sat down on a bench to eat. y/n had a massive plate of chilli cheese fries while cam had funnel cake. y/n wasn't one to question his choice, as he explained he ate an early dinner before he picked her up.
after eating they went into the arcade for a little over an hour. they walked out and the sky was now dark, with a million stars reflecting off the ocean.
now y/n and cam were walking side by side at the other end of the boardwalk. they were near the railing, away from all the games and bright lights, making it more quiet.
"i had a lot of fun tonight cam," y/n's smile hasn't left her face all day, and doesn't falter when she thanks him.
"me too, i'm glad you were able to come."
for a few moments it was quiet between the two. their hands kept brushing into each other's. y/n could feel the warmth radiating off of his hand, she couldn't help but slowly interlock her pinky with his.
"do you mind if we sit?" y/n points to a bench maybe ten feet away, "all the walking is finally catching up to me."
of course cam says yes. they sit beside each other on the cold bench, with the purple giraffe sitting lopsided by y/n's feet.
"are you not cold?" cam asks, suddenly remembering y/n was outside in only a tank top and shorts.
y/n shakes her head, "no uh- not really. i like the cold."
cam tilts his head towards her, "you sure? cause i could easily go to the gift shop for you."
y/n giggles at how sweet cam is, "really, i'm okay cam."
"do you know what you're gonna name it?" cam gestures to the giraffe he won for her earlier in the evening.
y/n shrugs, "i haven't really thought about it yet," she picks up the giraffe and studies it, "what about muffin?"
cam lets out a chuckle, "it's perfect."
a cool ocean breeze blows through the boardwalk. once it reaches y/n and cam, the girl shivers and subconsciously moves closer to cam. his cheeks flush slightly at the contact of her thigh pressing against his, and her shoulder bumping against his own.
"you sure about you not being cold?" cam laughs.
"okay, maybe it's a little cold now," y/n laughs with him.
silently, cam holds his hand open. y/n takes it, and a warm electric feeling flows through her body. cam's hand was shockingly warm, which was a great contrast to y/n's cold skin.
sadly, the fun night cam had planned for the pair had to come to an end. their hands never left each other's grip as cam walked y/n back to her house. once again, the two talked the whole way back.
y/n sighed once they reached the cobblestone driveway of her house. cam walked her up the steps of her porch, now turning to the girl once they reached the door.
"thank you for today cam," y/n thanked him again.
"i'm glad you had a good time," cam smiled down at the girl.
y/n smiled before leaning up to kiss the boy's cheek. her lips lingered there for a moment. just as she was about to unlock the front door, cam's voice stopped her.
"you missed."
y/n's eyesbrows furrowed.
"you missed," cam repeated.
before y/n can respond, cam grabs her hand again to pull her in front of him. he smiles before pushing his lips softly against y/n's. the kiss lasts for a few seconds before the girl pulls away. her cheeks are pink and her cold skin is suddenly warm.
"i really like you y/n," cam's voice is quiet, afraid to break the moment the two just shared.
to respond, y/n leans up to kiss cam again. this time one of her hands goes to his cheek to make the kiss become deeper. cam smiles against her lips, as his hold on her waist never falters.
this was the first of many dates for cam and y/n, and she loved every single one of them.
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crookedfandomquill · 7 months
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Alright, folks, I rewatched the Bo’re Life arc this week, and I have thoughts and a newfound appreciation for it (what? Me? Liking the Bo’re arc?It’s more likely than you’d think). As my mom used to say at the start of road trips or our semi-annual family viewing of The Sound of Music: buckle up, chitlins. 
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Okay, first off: this arc is a lot easier and more interesting to watch the second time around. I suspect that’s because I’m not chomping at the bit to just get back to Tantai Jin and Susu in the real world, since I already know what happens. This time, I can settle in and appreciate Bo’re Life without the urgency of “when is the actual story going to come back, fuck you writers”. It’s also very fun for me to draw parallels and find foreshadowing I didn’t notice before. And, having done so, I present the following thesis: the Bo’re Life arc strengthened the overall story both as a tragedy, and as a “happy” ending.
Addendum: I have a lot of thoughts about what constitutes a happy ending, and my thoughts on TTEOTM in this regard are complicated. Essentially, I would argue that the ending, while certainly sad, isn’t a “tragedy” in the narrative sense. While the individual happiness of the characters takes a real blow in the end, they do accomplish their ultimate goal. It’s a pyrrhic victory, but a victory nonetheless, and it’s implied that they will get a much happier ending as individuals sometime in the future. That doesn’t mean it was as satisfying as it could have been (it seems clear that TTJ will come back but I'm pissed we didn't get to see it), and I know a lot of viewers will totally disagree with my opinion. But I digress! Let’s get into Bo’re Life.
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Bo’re Life threw a LOT of information at both protagonists, and the roles they played in it didn’t correspond neatly with their own destinies, which kind of baffled me the first time around. Ming Ye represented both what Tantai Jin could aspire to be, and the mistakes Susu needed to avoid in neutralizing him. Sang Jiu represented both Susu’s traumas and doomed loveline, and Tantai Jin’s fate if Susu failed as Ming Ye had.
The parallels between Bo’re life and real life perfectly underline the tragedy of the story: both protagonists are shown beforehand the choices they must not make, but because of who they are, they make them anyway.
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Susu was an idealistic and traumatized woman with a mission, so she was always going to fail like Ming Ye did by putting the greater good ahead of love and communication. Tantai Jin was a disempowered and naive man falling in love for the first time, so he was always going to be just like Sang Jiu and give his fragile heart too fully, then shatter under the weight of betrayal. Bo’re Life both foretold the tragedy, and failed to prevent it. 
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It could be argued that Tantai Jin and Susu played the wrong roles in Bo’re Life to avoid tragedy in the Jing arc, but they played the right roles to avoid it in the cultivator arc. In the mortal world, Susu needed Ming Ye’s experience of losing everything because he neglected his heart. And Tantai Jin needed Sang Jiu’s experience of subsuming herself in another person so recklessly that she lost her soul to it. Neither of them got that, and so they repeated the tragedy of 10,000 years ago: Susu by loving and then betraying Tantai Jin, and Tantai Jin by allowing his obsessive love to run unchecked.
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But as cultivators, 500 years later, they both ended up relying on the virtues of the roles they played in Bo’re Life. Susu channeled Sang Jiu’s optimistic love and staunch loyalty to repair her relationship with Tantai Jin and become someone he could genuinely rely on. And Tantai Jin needed Ming Ye’s sacrificial love and dedication to the greater good to understand and execute his subversion of destiny.
This time around, they were both where they needed to be, playing the roles fate assigned them… but drastically changing the lines. Susu became a goddess, just like her mother, the only being who could defeat the Devil Lord. And Tantai Jin became the Devil Lord, just as he was born to do. But there was no battle between them, no great war like 10,000 years ago. Just like during their dance at the Jing water festival, Tantai Jin played his part, then surrendered.
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And, just as she removed his mask 500 years ago, Susu saw through his act to who he really was, who he’d always been.
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They redeemed the very mistakes they made at the end of their story in Jing: Susu, who couldn’t trust him and destroyed him as a result, finally gave him her trust, even as he wore the image of her greatest fears. And Tantai Jin, who was so desperate for her love that he killed her trying to keep her, finally let her go to save the world. 
The Jing arc ended with both of them as the worst versions of themselves: Susu vengeful and traumatized, Tantai Jin obsessive and broken. As she died, Susu threw Tantai Jin’s destiny in his face, calling him the greatest curse and rejecting him in this life and the next. In his last days in Jing, Tantai Jin devolved into despair and denial, unable to cope with the grief and betrayal. They didn't learn the correct lessons in Bo're life, not this time around.
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By contrast, the cultivator arc ended with both of them as the best versions of themselves: Susu capable of trust and forgiveness and elevated to godhood, Tantai Jin whole and loved and able to overturn his evil destiny. They learned, not just from their own mistakes, but from those of Ming Ye and Sang Jiu. And it helped them win.
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buckybarnesss · 8 months
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Lurker now follower here, hi hi, I love your blog and all your insights and thoughts on Teen Wolf and Sterek!! I just finished a rewatch and then immediately started over from the beginning because I am Unwell 😂😂😂
I’m on episode one and I gotta say it’s pretty hilarious how Stiles immediately recognizes Derek. Like, I can only imagine how obsessed he was with the fire and the Hale family, and now Derek is back!!
I don’t really have more coherent thoughts on this, just my brain going BRRRRR so yea lol 😂😂
hi! welcome!
i know we all joke about how stiles immediately knows it's derek hale that he and scott run into because it is funny. like stiles baby. honey. the signs were there.
i've always gotten the impression the fire is something stiles remembers very, very well.
the hale fire changed beacon hills. the hales had been there since the town's foundation. they were a well off, prominent family. there was reason to suspect arson. multiple children died and the only known survivors were two barely adult children and a severely burned, comatose man.
laura and derek were high schoolers. cora was eleven years old and presumed dead.
we're told the only thing left recognizable of talia hale were her claws.
it's the definition of a tragedy.
not to think of the supernatural repercussions to the vacuum left behind.
stiles would've been about 10 when the fire occurred which is young but old enough to understand the severity of such an event. especially as the child of the sheriff.
he probably saw how it weighed on his father and had a healthy dose of morbid curiosity. he may have even have knew cora hale in that passive way you know other kids in your school even if you don't know them personally. one day there and the next dead. for someone like stiles who gets hyper-focused on things and has a lot of anxiety stemming from the death of his mother i can easily imagine how his mind didn't let it go.
meeting derek in person created a hyperfixation so intense and so unhinged it led to him recognizing teen derek hale at 50 paces or less in a mexican desert several years later.
as he got to know derek he unlocked the layered tragic backstory stiles really became derek's secret keeper.
and it is only stiles that gets these pieces of the puzzle that is derek hale. he's the one who goes through the hale fire files, he's the one who pieced together that kate argent preyed on a young derek and he knows about paige.
i find it interesting choice to have only stiles know these things about derek. scott never learns of these things that could possibly make him more empathetic towards derek. the writers don't use it that way.
especially because stiles learning these things never goes anywhere overt. it's all in the subtext of the relationship between derek and stiles.
like, stiles learns about paige and he does nothing with this information but we do see him with tears in his eyes over it. he doesn't ever learn that paige's death gave power to the nemeton either. jennifer only tells derek that.
he knows all of this about derek and never tells anyone. he only ever alludes to knowing about kate one time and it's in the overlooked when he gets in derek's face. i'm unsure derek's even aware stiles knows about paige. stiles carries all these secrets about derek and he never uses it against him. instead he continues to keep coming back again and again and again for derek.
more importantly he understands derek and what is love but the mortifying ordeal of being known.
that all said stiles is absolutely unhinged about derek and derek does nothing to curb this by the way. if it bothered him he'd stop it but they are freak4freak so derek probably finds it charming even if he puts up a few token protests just to bait stiles.
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mirageofadesert · 4 months
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Looking back on my first year as a c-drama fan!
This year I fell - first down a flight of stairs - and then (because I couldn't walk properly for a few weeks) down a rabbit hole of cdramas!
In total, I have watched 28 dramas since May. I actually finished 17 of them. I re-watched 8 of them at least once. My most rewatched show is Till The End Of The Moon, followed by Love Is Sweet and The Untamed!
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Shows I loved
Till The End of The Moon: This drama triggered my hyperfixation, and I still love it so much. Tantai Jin became my new obsession.
Love is Sweet: This one surprised me because I don't usually care for romantic dramas. It made me more open to different genres.
The Untamed: I watched this for the first time in 2019, and now I can appreciate it even more.
The Sleuth of Ming Dynasties: It took me several tries to get into the drama because the political setting was too complicated. I'm glad I didn't give up. Wang Zhi became one of my favorites!
New Life Begins: I was just looking for something light in between and was quite surprised how much I liked the show.
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Things I learned as a newbie:
Cdramas are an acquired taste. Sometimes it's worth going back to a drama that you initially gave up on.
To avoid spoilers, it's best to skip the intro and especially the outro.
I love my characters unhinged.
Apparently it is okay to share leaks from filming.
Never believe anything that comes from yxh accounts.
Shippers are toxic in any fandom.
C-drama fans are a bit older than K-pop fans, but they can be just as unhinged and have trouble distinguishing between how to treat actors and the fictional characters they play.
My ADHD is better regulated when I watch shows in a foreign language while reading the subtitles. I don't get bored watching TV, which is rare!
Shows I dropped, and what I learned from it:
Hidden Love: I still don't like romances that have no significant plot beyond the relationship. Especially if I don't care about the characters at all.
Back from the Brink: Sometimes dramas that start well become an unwatchable, rage-inducing mess halfway through, and it's not worth sticking it out to the end.
Beauty of Resilience: I'm a character-driven audience. If the characters aren't compelling and the story isn't interesting, I don't care about the show.
Ashes of Love: I hate childish FL with baby voices and naive personalities. I need better written female characters. I'm on my 3rd attempt to watch this show and I only have a handful of episodes left, so I'll actually make it to the end (eventually).
I've dropped a lot more shows and actually watched some to the end that I didn't like very much in the end, but those are the ones I learned the most from.
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What will stay with me:
Tantai Jin: I'm still obsessed with this character. He is everything I need in a fictional character.
Luo Yunxi: This will come as no surprise to anyone who follows me, but my obsession with TTJ soon extended to Luo Yunxi.
Bai Lu & Sun Zhenni: While I appreciate both of them as actors, it's their fun and uninhibited personalities that made me fall in love with them!!
Costumes: I adore the detailed costumes and hanfu styles, and do prefer costume dramas to modern ones.
Food & drinks: I'm now looking into more Chinese foot now and how to cook vegetables in more interesting ways. I also bought "moon cake stamps"... so wish me luck!
New online acquaintances: I have made some new friends online who I can fangirl with to my heart's content!
What I'm looking forward to in 2024:
I'm really looking forward to Luo Yunxi's upcoming dramas, Follow You Heart, Shui Long Yin and Immortality (🤡). I'm also looking forward to Sun Zhenni's first leading role!
There are still many dramas I want to watch, but haven't found the time for. Like A Journey to Love, Goodbye, My Princess, Nirvana in Fire, Then Miles of Peach Blossoms and The Blood of Youth.
I'm not sure what else I'll post here next year. Probably more reviews and content related to my favourite actors. Let's see if something triggers my hyperfixation soon!
Happy New Year!
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autistic-puffin · 8 months
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AHSOKA SPOILERS AHEAD
(also, long post apparently)
i'm actually kind of obsessed with this latest tidbit from baylan. the fact that he decided to reframe the fall of the jedi both as something inevitable, a repeated pattern throughout history, and that they had coming due to their own weakness, instead of what it is (genocide).
we've all seen how different jedi responded, how some became inquisitors or otherwise turned to the dark side, how some turned their backs on the force entirely (like kanan tried to), how some stayed completely hidden and separate (yoda), how some ended up training new jedi (like kanan also did)
it's really interesting to me that baylan is aware of the other "wild" jedi (bokken jedi, apparently), and considers himself different and separate from them, but shin still associates herself with the bokken jedi. when they first appeared, given their red lightsabers, i figured they had to be more sith-aligned, though probably not outright sith. if they're gray enough for shin to still consider herself as jedi-trained before baylan corrects her, then that's super interesting to me also.
the other day i rewatched the first two episodes of rebels. the very first episode opens with darth vader telling the grand inquisitor to hunt down the force sensitive children - and any surviving jedi that could train them. i am beyond obsessed with the apparent inevitability that jedi will train new jedi, but moreso also with the different ways we see this play out.
there's kanan, who retains his jedi identity (obviously there were some bumps along the road with that) and has a proper padawan he trains/raises to be a jedi.
there's ahsoka "i am no jedi" tano, the "part-timer", who does also apparently take on a (basically not force sensitive) padawan and abandons her. we also see her refuse to train grogu.
and now there's baylan skoll, who trains a padawan to be "more" than a jedi, who seems (at least sometimes) reluctant to kill other jedi, who has semi-fond memories of the temple, whose padawan seems actually uncertain about their status as jedi or not.
both ahsoka and baylan definitely exist in the gray between jedi and sith, with ahsoka basically still being a jedi and baylan being much more dark side-adjacent.
it's just so fascinating to me that we've seen multiple jedi/former-jedi/jedi-adjacent people that are so bitter and disillusioned with the jedi order, so critical of their failures and shortcomings, that they seem to ignore the reality of what happened. they were massacred. their home and the center of their culture was burned, their children were murdered, they were shot down by their own troops in the field, they were chased and hunted down and killed. regardless of the very real flaws of the jedi order, they didn't deserve that. no one does.
i think baylan's reframing makes a lot of sense as a classic trauma response. "this bad thing that happened was actually for a reason beyond palpatine's agenda, the jedi were too weak." because if there were real reasons, then it's preventable. he also, though, views it as a continuing pattern in history. the key thing here is that he thinks (apparently) it's a pattern that he can stop. he seems to both think it was the fault of the jedi for their weakness but also an inevitable pattern of history. he addresses both by raising his apprentice to be "more" than a jedi and by this mysterious plan to stop the cycle of history from repeating itself.
this is the longest post i've written about star wars in a minute and i'm not entirely sure my thoughts have made sense (definitely doubtful they'll be read). i also haven't looked at what people have been saying for this week's episode, so it'll be hilarious if someone else has already spoken on this. it's turning around in circles in my brain. i just think the post-order 66 jedi are really really interesting and i think about them a lot
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hangmanbradshaw · 2 months
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Have you ever considered writing a Hannah Montana The Movie inspired Hangster AU? Something about the vibe of that movie just screams Hangster to me.
In my head it would be something like Bradley being forced to go his hometown and stay at his uncles' (Mav and Ice's) ranch where (surprise surprise) Jake lives and works. Idk why Bradley had to go there, maybe he's famous and has to escape some kind of scandal? I can totally see him being a famous singer (á la miss Montana) and maybe Mav and Ice used to be famous too but chose to leave the spotlight and settle down on the ranch and now they will show Bradley that there's another way of life. I also think the Mav/Ice & Jake dynamic would be really funny. Like, Jake's parents suck so he left home to apply for work at the ranch, but when Mav and Ice saw him they were just like "welp, guess that's our kid now". And so they make fun of each other (Jake calls them old) but Mav and Ice are fiercely protective of him and will call Bradley out on any bullshit when they start to get together.
There's also the perfect opportunity to include some Taylor Swift since she's literally in the movie! Also Lucas Till's character is named Travis, like, that's too good!!
Oh and the whole "I used to have a pretty big crush on you" "Don't worry it passed" (or whatever the lines are) conversation is SO Hangster coded.
Anyways, I'm sure you would come up with an amazing story so please feel free to steal the idea if you ever feel the inspiration strike!
OOOOH I could so dig this. I'm really enjoying this vibe of country/ranch Jake at the moment, and putting Bradley in that just feels right. Feels good. They have this history from when they were kids until Bradley left, and then he's back and just the bantery bickering as they feel each other out again. Also the dynamic with icemav would be really good, where they're kinda in the middle being switzerland but also Bradley so confused about when they basically became Jake's parents lmao. (I'm gonna have to go rewatch the hannah montana movie now) Anyways this is amazing!!!!! Obsessed. Maybe one day.......ahh.
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