33! 👀
ooh you picked a Good One!
33 is a wip that i labelled "flower." I talked a little about some of the shorter snips with rogue secunit OCs that i've written that never really went anywhere. This is not one of them. I have 16,000 words of it.
The fic is called flower because Flower is the name of the rogue SecUnit OC. I was probably a goner as soon as I named it that (Flower, my beloved 🥰). The original concept was just "Murderbot & Three run into some enemies who have a SecUnit while on a mission with ART's crew, and they hack the SecUnit's governor module." Then it developed a personality, which is why it went farther than just a few short snips. Flower named itself Flower before it was rogue, based on pictures in its education modules--it has not seen an actual flower before. Flower is a SecUnit who absolutely hates hurting people, in the hands of a company that uses it mostly for hurting people. It is not having a good time, and when MB & Three give it a way out, it takes it, even though it's scared of what might come next.
That was like, the first chapter, and subsequent scenes I wrote were all of a very anxious Flower getting used to being a rogue, meeting humans who treated it like a person, and settling in on Preservation. Three faded into the background because frankly i am bad at writing Three in any time period significantly after NE, because there is just not enough to extrapolate its personality from. So it was mostly Murderbot somewhat reluctantly babysitting a brand new rogue, on a Preservation Station that had only dealt with two other rogues so far and was still getting used to this whole "rogue SecUnits walking around" situation.
It was fun writing a unit that completely hated violence. Partially because it was angsty, and partially because it clashed really well with Murderbot, who is perfectly fine with violence as long as it's the one in control. I wrote a scene in which there was some kind of dangerous situation on Preservation, and MB expected Flower to back it up, but Flower wouldn't engage in helping it stop the hostiles and someone got (non-lethally) hurt. MB was mad and lashed out at Flower but eventually backed off and reconsidered, and had a moment where it realized that Flower had a right to draw its own line that it wasn't willing to cross, just like MB did after Ganaka Pit. That was a scene that I really enjoyed writing.
I really like Flower, and I like this fic, but I think i've already written all the good bits and don't know if I'll ever have the motivation I would need to polish it off. Writing it definitely informed other rogue OCs that i've come up with, and I might sneak a Flower cameo into the OU,YU universe at some point, just for fun :)
This answer is super long already but I want to share some actual words from this fic, so here's a bit from the beginning--Flower is in ART's MedSystem post-combat-turned-rescue, and the POV is Murderbot.
ART said, Do you require any further assistance at this time?
I said, “Something’s wrong with its gunports. Or its targeting software. It shot me in the foot.”
My targeting software is fully functional.
“Then why did your shot hit so low?”
I was targeting your legs.
“Why?” There was no protocol saying to use minimum necessary force against a SecUnit. When we fight we try to kill each other as quickly and thoroughly as possible. “Did you have orders to incapacitate? What kind of idiot tells you to avoid shooting a SecUnit enough to actually stop it?”
I was not ordered to refrain from using lethal force. It was a breach of protocol.
“You broke protocol? On purpose? With a working governor module?”
I don’t like killing.
The way it said that…sounded like it had been thinking it for a long time, but had never been able to say it before.
I said, “This wasn’t the first time?”
No. I thought…maybe they would assign me to a different contract if I disobeyed. But they just put a counter on my governor module to record how many times I violated protocol by using nonlethal force. If I kept doing it they were going to dismantle me for spare parts.
“How many strikes did you have left?”
This mission was my last chance.
That hit me hard. It had known that if it disobeyed again it would be destroyed. It had faced the even more immediate threat of me and Three killing it. It had known it would die.
But it had still shot me in the foot instead of the head.
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i love makoto so much but fanon does her so much better (the good parts of the fandom) because in the game her character is so lack luster. they butchered her confidant it is so borning and not even about her. they made her a cop. A COP. they pushed this "canon waifu" role onto her (before sumire came along and did it Even Worse). and it SUCKS because SHE IS SO MUCH MORE!!! SHE IS SO MUCH BETTER!!!! SHE COULD'VE BEEN SO MUCH BETTER!!! the way i feel about canon makoto is the same way i feel about the canon ryuji events post komoshida where he's horribly mistreated and used purely as comic relief: i ignore them <3 my game now <3 never happened <3 my ocs <3
You are so right. I generally apply this to all characters in p5 bc the game does such a shit job of staying consistent with character arcs and personalities. Theres a desperate need to throw in perverse jokes at the expense of female characters and a need to show that the police (as a whole) are reliable people who are not influenced by things like money and power; only the BAD cops do that. Not to mention this obvious fatphobia and homophobia but i feel likes thats a given.
But back to Makoto. Shes a victim of bad writing just like everyone else. Ryuji during the kamoshida arc was fighting with self loathing and genuine anxiety, and aside from the like. One comment on Panthers outfit in the metaverse, hes more than well behaved. All of that is shelved as soon as Kamoshida is gone and replaced with him being weird comic relief (and the focus of alot of sexual jokes that were nonexistent in the beginning of the game). Anns arc about self love and empowerment is completely dropped as soon as the nasty bad guy is put away (so that its good to be weird about her w the Good Guys). Makoto loses her a chunk of her personality to be the mature waifu which is INSANE to me bc shes like. Not okay or normal at all 😭😭😭 she THINKS shes responsible and so does everyone else on her team, but its an act! She doesnt know shit! And she doesnt know that she doesnt know shit bc shes respectful and adults dont care about anything as long as u respect them!
Its very telling that for literally every single thief (and goro), you can see the exact moment the writers gave up on adding anything of worth to their characters outside of the social links. Its like they didnt know what to even do w the characters at their disposal after their main arcs were complete. No mention of friends hanging out without you, no mention of having group hangouts. Everyone is treated as a core, important member of the friend group DURING their arc, but outside of it, they are acquaintances at best. Theres nothing in the game that convinces you that these guys are legitimately friends who care for each other and do Friend Things. And i describe it like that bc there IS a game that treats them all as friends, and its strikers! Strikers/Scramble genuinely feels like the game p5 wanted to be; a road trip w your team where they stay up at night talking to each other and hanging out and doing things together that dont necessarily include you, the player. Its refreshing and lovely but it sucks that u get that kind of attention to detail in a ‘spinoff’ title
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Last Line Tag Game
Thanks for tagging me @teejaystumbles ! A really nice surprise!! :D
I am indeed contemplating writing two Dead Boy Detectives fic right now, but they're both in the very early 'being-outlined-in-my-head' stage, haha. They both revolve around post-s1 Edwin pining for Charles, one where Edwin takes matters into his own hands and one where he decides to have a chat with the Cat King about it. Not sure if they'll ever be written but they're intriguing!
But for the sake of the tag game, here's a lengthy bit from a Dreamling wip I've slowly been chipping away at for a few months!
A scene from Every Little Thing (Working Title)—
In which Morpheus is a figure drawing professor who has just been fired from a film production based on his comics, and Hob does part-time figure modeling and is determined befriend the aforementioned professor.
Morpheus picks his class schedules wisely— he runs two first year general figure drawing classes, at 8 a.m. and at noon on Mondays and Thursdays. He helps the uni’s live figure workshop club on Wednesdays and Fridays at 6 p.m., and meets his sister for lunch on Wednesdays. All other free time was dedicated for his industry work.
That wouldn’t be a concern anymore, would it.
By the time Morpheus unlocks the door to the studio, sets his bag down by his desk, and starts fiddling with the ceiling studio lights pointed at the model stand, all of Morpheus’ thoughts have reduced to pure spite. Fine, maybe the big studios don’t want him. They don’t deserve him, then, their loss. His portfolio and repertoire are infamous in the industry, they’ll be crawling back to him in no time. Too bad, maybe he would have started his own production studio and he’ll end up with the next ground-breaking animated film. Maybe—
Morpheus’ thoughts are interrupted by a knock at the door.
He shakes himself out of it, calling, “Come in.” A glance at his watch tells him it’s only 7:48, perhaps it’s an overeager student here early. It’s only the second week of the semester, they grab every opportunity to prove themselves with a spirited step that Morpheus might be slightly envious of.
“Hello, Morpheus Endeles?”
Hearing his full name startles Morpheus, and he turns from the lighting settings to the door. “Yes?”
The man who steps into view can only be described as radiant.
He can’t be much older than Morpheus, not much taller either but wider in the shoulders. His hair is cropped just above his shoulders and he sports a neatly kept beard. Morpheus registers this all first simply because of his profession but— he gets caught on the man’s brilliant smile and deep brown eyes. There’s something there that knocks all thoughts clear out of Morpheus’ head. The stranger smiles warmly, smiles like he already cares.
“I’m here to model for the morning and noon figure classes?” The man says.
Morpheus clears his throat and steps forward, “Yes, this is the right studio.” He extends a hand, “Robert Gadling, I presume?”
The man takes his hand— god, he’s so warm— and shakes it steadily, “Please, call me Hob! All my friends do.”
I'm a sucker for the 'Morpheus catalogues Hob's appearance during their first meeting' trope in most Dreamling human AU fics, I couldn't not do it too :]
Besides this, I've also got a Dreamling Velvet Goldmine-ish AU fic that I want to get done this summer. I'm a very slow and ruminative writer so let's see if I can commit to any of these fics now that I've posted about them lol!
No pressure tags! I have no idea who's been tagged recently so-- lol. @hardly-an-escape @valeriianz @moorishflower @amielot :)
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the brilliance of jay's progression in countdown is that it gives you a promise of positive character development, and then it breaks it. and it does so intentionally, in the most diverting way, to emphasize jason's inability to escape the cycle.
or, another post breaking down the series, where i repeat myself a lot but also make a clearer argument.
there are three notable events that happen at the beginning: the subtle showcase of jay's internal conflict considering his approach toward killing (the very first encounter with duela and the monitor), jay reaching out to donna in crisis ("i guess I just wanted to be around someone else who might know how it feels…"), and finally – his helmet shattering. these scenes tell you: jason's direction as a character is changing, and it seems, for the better. he's about to abandon his trauma-based (no matter how ironic, it does remain tied to his trauma) identity, he is connecting with people, and he seems to be on a brink of understanding that his moral standing does not provide easy answers or solutions either.
and for the most part of the series, we see that narrative unfolding (even if a bit non-linear, still innocently convincing way). it is, in many ways, supported by bringing up features of his characterisation from the 80s. jason remains, of course, still unpleasant in ways typical for this era of writing, and is conflicted and disagreeable, which makes sense for his utrh/post-utrh personality. however, there are also details that bring us back to his original robin run and his cameos on ntt – we see him being responsible (e.g. #43 – suggesting to bring in other superheroes in crisis, even though he clearly is not keen on the idea of working with them), determined (#16: “isn’t that your super-power, stupid boy? too stupid to ever give up?” “maybe it is”), sensitive (half of the whole storyline, really), caring for gotham (gotham by gaslight) and people-oriented (as early as #51).
the issue that particularly signals that jason is an inherently good person and externalizes his internal conflicts regarding classic heroic vigilantism vs his cynical approach is #30, where we meet batman of earth-15 – alt jason, whom our jason attempts to punch in the face.
and on topic of batman – jason is always gravitating towards batman. in gotham by gaslight jay looks delighted to see (the foreign) bruce and suggests checking with the local bat. then, earth-51 arc arrives.
earth-51 arc (#16 - #13) is a culmination of a promise of catharsis for jason. we have already seen him as batman, as a confirmation that a different life for him is possible. and here he has a chance to come to terms with his past and overcome it. he meets a version of bruce who has done exactly what he wanted him to do in utrh: killed the joker and the rest of the rogue gallery. what is most important – he is disappointed with this version of his father. we realise that jason, deep down, has an intimate and intuitive understanding of what batman stands for; and that he shares most of his values. this is a truth that you can't ignore especially since jay is the one to inspire this hollow, cynical version of batman to go out and fight in a seemingly lost battle.
and then batman dies. right in front of him.
this is a central moment of the narrative, for many reasons, most strikingly:
the symmetry:, a premise known from the lost days, becomes literal. this "the father had lost a son, and now the son had lost the father" is a cruel parallel to a death in the family and bruce's grief. jason's death created a gap between them that jay has been desperately trying to close, with no avail – because in bruce's mind, jason remains dead. now that jason is grieving bruce, the connection closes on both sides, and there's no way for either of them to reconcile the mourning with the reality of the other being truly alive. in this sense, the arc solidifies that jason can never come home.
no good deed goes unpunished. as i have mentioned before, so far jason is established as someone good at heart, but confused; and the reader intuitively assumes that his better, honest side will win. yet, the moment jason gives in to hope, it victimises and retraumatizes him. this event, again, brings to mind his own death, when he tried his best to save sheila and ended up paying the highest price for it. so, narrative-wise, jason is always punished for his kindness.
perhaps because of the nonchalant act that jason pulls off, many readers seem to miss that everything that happens after that arc is an upshot that follows logically from it.
jason's immediate determination to leave – and later a short period of indecision that ends up with his dramatic exit, pushing his team away, makes perfect sense when you consider what intense trauma he has just gone through. admittedly, i'm not a fan of the notion that he would give up at all (i think he's always ready to give up on himself, but not on the world), but then on the other hand, if there's anything that would cause it, narrative-wise, witnessing batman dying does sound like a good incentive for that. (it also has to be pointed out that jason seems to be confident that the rest of the team can go into the final battle without him anyway; it's not like he would go back to his earth not even knowing if said earth will exist tomorrow).
it's crucial to notice that following that crisis of faith (faith in fighting for the world) is followed by him raising up for the challenge again, but now... worse and even more confused. in the final confrontation with donna, jason antagonizes the superhero community, and when we see him at the end of the series (#1) his monologue indicates that he believes the capes to be naive. (significantly, he also focuses on bruce and offends the memory of 51 earth-bruce by calling him crazy; an action that can be seen as suppression of his own guilt and invoking, once again, a cruel symmetry considering bruce's engagement in victim-blaming after jason's death). this, once again, is consistent with the "no good deed" reading – jason diminishes superhero values because he has been continuously punished for living by them. (and unlike other superheroes, he doesn't have a support system nor skills in compartmentalization that would help him deal with this trauma) every leap of hope re-traumatised him. hence, it seems to be no surprise that jason decides to abandon the mask, and in the closing scene we see him without it. the promise of the shattered helmet is pushed to an extreme – jason does not get a new alt identity. he denounces the idea of superheroism completely.
and yet, what is ultimately subversive about the ending, is that jay is not truly a civilian and he does not abandon vigilante ways. he does the same thing. we see him without a mask, but he is clearly working a case. he might have rejected the symbolic dimension of the vigilante work, but he still carries the same delusional hope for bettering the world and protecting people that the superhero community does. only now, he is even more isolated and doesn't have any identity to go by (as he is still legally dead).
as such, the ending opens a new question regarding jason's understanding of himself and vigilantism, or rather the lack thereof. is it possible that vigilantism is really at the core of jay's trauma? and why, potentially, is it something that is so destructive for him as a character specifically? (and i have some answers for that, but i'm not going to get into it here, as it's already a very long post)
so, tldr; the genius of countdown is that it establishes jay as sensitive, determined, and fundamentally good (this is what the purpose of seeing him as batman is!), and then it brutally reminds the reader that jason’s tragedy is that on this specific earth, in this specific timeline, his love doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. the story goes on as it did; one way or another, jay is trapped in the cycle of his care ironically creating rifts between him and the others, and bringing him to his own downfall.
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The idea of these three working together is just so amusing:
Lysandre: *attempted genocide, almost blew up Pasio, and flash-boiled two people alive (with heavy implications he'd have done the same to a third person IN FRONT OF A CHILD)*
Lusamine: *froze dozens of not hundreds of Pokemon going by her room, and was super controlling/abusive to her two kids, tho she did get better/is actively trying to repair that relationship*
Rose: *just wanted to find a good source of energy and improve the lives of people, isn't like he actually knew who Giovanni was at first or even really had any substantial reason to distrust him aside from Oleana getting suspicious vibes* What is wrong with you people?! 😱
-----
Lysandre: Sometimes, in the course of human events, some people get boiled alive. 🤷♂️
Lusamine and Rose: WHAT
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Lysandre, having dinner with Rose to discuss some technological collab project: I can't stand this world becoming uglier. I would destroy the world in an instant so that beauty will never fade!
Rose, nervously: Uh...yes... Wouldn't we all?
Rose, texting Oleana under the table: OLEANA PLEASE GET ME OUT OF HERE
Oleana, already preparing to fire the sniper rifle, texting back: Don't worry, sir. I got you.
Also:
Lysandre, taking out Volcanion's Pokeball: "I have a plan."
Lusamine, Rose, AND Sycamore: "No murder."
Lysandre, sighing and putting away Volcanion's Pokeball: "Fine. I don't have a plan."
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