#i dont think you can love someone unconditionally?

[strawberri-syrup]

i refuse to believe that unconditional love actually exists you get something out of every relationship you are in why would you be kind to someone if it didn't also serve you?

#i do believe that humans are inherantly good #and that we arent born with a desire to do harm or whatever #but also #i dont think you can love someone unconditionally? #everyone has limits #i am kind to others and am trying very hard ot be a Good Person #but im not kind to people for the sake of kindness u know? #it makes me feel good to be nice and i am scared of what someone would do ot me if i wasnt kind #its transactional #why would someone be friends w me if i wasnt doing something for them yk? #it makes sense in my head

[levmada]

PLEASE write about Levi’s mental state, i’m begging you

He’s faced death and precarious situations since he was born, yet he’s still standing strong and hopeful, WHAT THE HELL I LOVE MY SHORT KING

IT'S FINALLY HERE😭im sorry anon i hope you're around to see this and if u are i hope i dont disappoint

the tone in this analysis is so weird because i kept getting caught between 'this is an apa paper no contractions, academic language, double spacing -' and 'this is a tumblr post about a fictional blorbo wtf r u on'

i also use some scientific language i try my best to explain but if this turns anyone off i don't blame them because im unhealthily obsessed

*i'm a third-year undergraduate psychology student w/ a concentration in psychopathology

tw/cw: discussion of childhood exposure to sex (not assault)

Foreword

I’ve been putting this off for a while (I’m forgetful and this topic is intimidating what can I say), but being a year out from graduating with my bachelor’s to become a mental health professional, and being a Levi scholar(/hj), I wanted to give this a shot. 

I wanted to dissect and examine Levi Ackerman’s mental health “currently” (as in general canon), and explain as thoroughly but as simply as possible how and why he thinks and acts the way he does.

Seeing how AOT is pretty renowned for leaving out the ‘insignificant’ details, especially character details, a good majority of my assertions and even details of his life are built off of correlations and “signs and symptoms”; meaning some things could be an aspect of Levi’s personality, or a symptom of psychopathology. 

 I will examine his childhood (especially his childhood), adolescence, young adulthood, and “present” adulthood, with a short summary at the end of where he might be mentally after the war.

*Lastly, I don’t like it when things I say about a series or character are taken as fact or make it implied that someone else’s thoughts are “wrong”. This is partly built on headcanons anyway, which are influenced by my own experiences. Don’t take away from this that this is me telling you what to think.*

Childhood

The most important period of development occurs in infancy and childhood, especially from the ages of 3-6. This is when a child learns where to find security, love, and basic skills, gaining stability as they develop.

Well, Kuchel died when Levi was 4.

Maternal Love / Learning Empathy / Anxious Attachment Style

Levi was born into deep poverty within a violent unwelcoming environment. Basic physical needs must have been very hard to meet (i.e., consistently fed enough, a clean environment, no physical threats). And where Levi was born is like the dictionary definition of a bad environment for a small child, excluding only his mother’s care and love.

As it’s generally understood in canon (and suggested from Levi’s special backstory manga so far) she was a caring parental figure early in Levi’s life that loved him unconditionally. We can conclude that Kuchel did everything within her power to compensate for both parenting Levi alone and shielding him the best she could from his horrible surroundings, teaching the kindness, goodness, and love that Levi would internalize and go on to strive for for his entire life. 

As far as we know, no other children lived in the brothel. Socialization is just as important for a young child as receiving love. With this isolation, it’s extremely difficult to learn how to connect to other people, or pick up on social cues. Levi would’ve never learned how to interact properly with his peers—aside from use of aggression and violence which Kenny would go on to instill in him.

With the danger/anxiety imposed by strangers, mostly if not entirely men, he would turn to his mother for comfort all. The. Time. 

And she would give him that support and affection of course. This early motherly affection is integral to child development: a child who receives empathy and affection is subliminally taught how to feel and express empathy towards others. 

While Levi’s surroundings were dangerous, lonely, and chaotic—traumatizing enough for a toddler or young child—Kuchel provided a safety net from that, so I think that Levi developed an anxious attachment as a child: exhibiting clinginess, excessive fear of abandonment, and an excessive need for security and/or reassurance.

Paternal Trauma / Potential Androphobia

Born and living in a brothel, we can assume that Levi was probably seen as a burden and a mistake by others, especially by men (both the likely majority of her customers and her boss).

AOT ch69; Before the Fall, ch34

This is likely in contrast to the women (those living and working in the brothel like Kuchel). They should know Kuchel if not as friends, then acquaintances who could empathize for her and her son. 

There’s an obvious trend here. If Levi is going to feel fear/danger/anxiety because of men, he should have a general aversion to men and-or the behavior of men who he encountered as a child. This is impossible to know for sure or in meaningful detail, but it seemed to be resolved by the time he became an adult if so.

Although Kenny in his words was no more than Levi's teacher, Levi did see him as a father figure.

The subject of Kenny will be expanded on later, but it's clear Kenny in no way resembled a father, who also would go on to abandon Levi (at the age of 11 or so). Children without father figures tend to struggle more emotionally, psychologically, and socially. Specifically, (especially boys) tend to exhibit intimidating/aggressive personas to compensate for resentment, fear, and unhappiness. 

Sexual Trauma (Tangent, Probably)

This is unconfirmed but a likely trauma Levi went through: exposure to sex as a child. There’s no way to confirm what he experienced, so I’ll function on ‘probably’s’ and ‘most likely’s’. 

Because Levi and Kuchel only lived in one room, other rooms in the brothel should have belonged to other women, and he was at the oldest four, I wager that he was babysat by women who Kuchel knew and/or was made to hide somewhere while she worked, such as in a cabinet.

(for reference)

AOT ch69

The odds are high that he was exposed to the aftermath of sexual violence (i.e., marks seen on his mother), and the sound or smells that have to do with it. That young, he wouldn’t know what it was, but he should have realized later as an adolescent.

In general, children regardless of gender exposed to sexual content usually experience early puberty (which is just as likely for impoverished children, or children who experience chronic high-stress in general); issues with intimacy; become desensitized to high-risk behavior; negative/inaccurate expectations about sex and relationships in the future; influence inappropriate behavior with other children or adults; sex addiction.

This is especially relevant to Levi’s fear of closeness/intimacy in the future. Exposure to sexual situations—possibly not including CSA in his case—very early in life inflicts on a child emotions and stress they don’t have the intellect or reasoning to process or understand. An extreme aversion to interpersonal relationships, especially physical ones, results.

This stress Levi must have felt, being powerless to this happening to his mother, is a different beast. Children aren’t capable of handling high levels of stress, and so the brain will automatically create coping mechanisms: dissociation (a severe form of “zoning out”; observing the self “from the third person”; numbness; the feeling of living in a dream), excessive daydreaming/overactive imagination, symptoms of PTSD (nightmares and terrors; flashbacks; spontaneous activation of fight-flight-freeze associated with anxiety; excessive worrying/fear; loneliness/self isolation). PTSD will also be prevalent in Levi’s later life, which I’ll delve into later.

Inappropriate behavior and sex addiction are also highlights for me because they shouldn’t exist in him based on Levi's personality and behavior throughout the series. In my opinion, Levi ought to associate sex with pain, shame, and violence; he does see it as an ordinary job—a means to an end. He should be desensitized to sex as a concept, but associates it personally with shame, sadness, and pain, possibly feeling disgust towards it. So it is highly likely that Levi in every stage of life following this experienced sexual repulsion (usually associated with high anxiety towards sex), a low libido, or a lack of sexual desire entirely. 

From a trauma perspective, he could avoid sexual topics of conversation, sexual settings (i.e., brothels), or an array of things which are sexually suggestive or he as a child possibly associated with sex (i.e., cleavage, panties, specific touch). Similarly, he might avoid direct reminders or have a post-traumatic reaction to them, such as anxiety or flashbacks (i.e., the sound of a bed creaking, the sight of wet clothes).

Importantly, it can be concluded that sexual violence was often exhibited, and the idea would be ingrained in him that sex, like everything else besides his relationship with his mother, is “give-and-take”, “victim-and-attacker”, and learn to be repulsed by intimacy. This impacts his willingness for later friendships and relationships as we’ll see later. 

Early Abandonment & Early Exposure to Death

As Kuchel’s health deteriorated, Levi’s sense of security would break down. Availability of shelter, food, and emotional support would be even less secure than before. He might have been providing for Kuchel for some time, even, as it can be gathered that he received little to no help from those around him while she was sick. To whatever length he had to take responsibility and both fear for Kuchel, this would cement a sense of responsibility and guilt in him from the age of just four years old.

He will fail to save her—regardless of the fact that that’s not his responsibility in the first place; a child wouldn’t understand that—and then lose her with nothing he could do to even cushion the blow.

How powerless he must’ve felt. How hopeless. How likely is it that Levi found comfort in joining her? A child his age wouldn’t be able to comprehend death, basing our understanding on Piaget’s theory of cognitive development. To summarize, at the age of six or seven, children aren’t capable of complex, abstract thought like death or the finality of it. But Levi had to learn early. 

AOT ch69

This will be center in his “clean-freak” tendencies later.

Adolescence

Most of this section is going to be rather vague again, but we already got the bulk of that over with in childhood!

Emotional Train Wreck / Lack of Identity 

It’s hard to notice if you’re not paying attention, but in every scene we’re shown with Levi after his mother dies but before Kenny leaves, he’s wearing some variation of his mother’s one dress styled into a shirt. He loves her endlessly, even or especially in death. And part of cherishing her memory, to him, should’ve been taking after her as much as he could.

That’s how to explain why he didn’t become a cruel person (Kenny for instance) as he grew into a teenager, even though much of Levi’s outlook and behaviors come from him (ch57).

The more pertinent question is how extreme violence, reinforcement of the idea that that violence is power, and Kenny’s total (or most likely total) lack of communicated emotional connection affected him.

Levi would still desperately want that connection deep down, especially with his mother gone. This is a major reason why Levi sought to get stronger to please Kenny. For chronically abandoned people, that continues into adulthood and even beyond. A hole inside which can't be filled.

AOT ch69

Chronic loneliness—like I explained before—basically explains his aloof nature and awkward disposition. It’s not that Levi feels as detached as he looks, but he doesn’t know how to express himself or open up. He wouldn’t learn how to process his emotions, let alone talk about them. He’s basically emotionally stunted and immature in impersonal relationships (between friends and especially in regards to intimacy).

The Underground’s environment also makes him socially awkward, rude, of course stoic/not very expressive, and blunt. Levi was forced to become extremely observant of people to suss out their intentions, remaining vigilant of his surroundings at all times.

Levi doesn’t even get affection in any sense anymore. He doesn’t get a hug or a pat on the back, and he certainly doesn’t get a shoulder to cry on.

If anything, Kenny would punish him for showing weakness. Vulnerability is weakness; weakness is death.

What results is a continuous and boundless sense of emptiness inside that can’t be filled. He’s plagued by a chronic sense of unbelonging and loneliness. There’s no time or opportunity to develop “normally” as an adolescent. Socialization is limited at best; thinking of his place in the world is irrelevant when his one and only most pressing goal is survival; he doesn’t get to explore hobbies or interests.

OCD Propensity

One “interest” Levi is passionate about is cleaning, at least. Disease is what caused his mother to die. The easiest cause to point to would be their disgusting surroundings (although, Kuchel was infected by a customer). It is canon that Levi’s love of cleaning comes from "his personal experiences". In that interview, Levi first specifically references the important of fighting disease.

In other words, his "clean freak" nature comes, primarily, from the death of his mother: Filth -> disease -> death, and abandonment by extension.

His mother would’ve encouraged him to keep their room clean. There were times he or she had to have come down with something and dirtiness was the cause. On top of Kenny’s enforcement to keep up “clean” appearances to garner respect from everyone else in the Underground. 

This in particular is extremely relevant to his mental health. When someone feels out of control of what is happening to them, especially in a recurring way, and especially as a child who doesn't yet know how to feel stable in an unstable environment, they look for something to control. It can be weight, bodily functions (blinking, breathing, etc), dominance over others, or cleaning, for instance.

Fear of disease, the urgent need to have control, and the basic need for stability makes it obvious that Levi would become obsessed with cleaning. And moreover, developing OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). I’ll go deeper into this diagnosis later.

Lack of Self Worth

Despite the acknowledgment throughout canon that he trusts in his own strength, it wasn’t always that way.

Canonically, Levi sought praise from Kenny by showing his strength because that was the only thing he received praise for. The conclusion Levi came to once Kenny left him was that he wasn’t strong enough (wasn’t good enough) to warrant staying with him.

In conjunction, Levi’s first conclusion was that he did something wrong, not that Kenny possibly had some obligation that forced him to leave the Underground, pointing again to his own lack of self-worth.

This scenario created a complex in him, the very root cause of Levi’s pain, the very foundation of what Levi would go on to prioritize in adulthood. If he isn’t useful to those he wants not to abandon him, he’s worthless. He’s only useful when he shows his strength. Every other aspect of him like his interests is either irrelevant or bland by default in his eyes.

He would go on to make it his mission to try his best to be good enough in order to save and protect the lives of others, but foremost those he cares about.

Young Adulthood

Our first exposure to Levi as an adult is in A Choice with No Regrets, his OVA/backstory.

(By the way, I’ll be basing this analysis off a mix of the manga and the OVA.)

Emotional Immaturity/Affective Dysregulation

Generally, Levi’s defining negative character trait as a young adult is his emotional immaturity/anti-social behavior. Yes he’s grumpy and rude which is always indicative of him, but he’s very quick to anger, too. He cursed at the Squad Leader who offended him (by assuming that because he, Isabel, and Farlan are from the Underground, they’d be dirty), and argued furiously with Farlan that he would kill Erwin—not because it was required for the job, but because he disrespected him—for a few examples. 

ACWNR ch2

He tended to be arrogant, too. Such as when he ultimately called a Scout who had experience with the Titans stupid for telling Levi to hold his swords in a certain way. He spoke to every officer the same as he would anyone on the street, having a remarkable lack of basic respect for authority. He was insistent on distancing himself from the entire setting and structure of the Scouts as much as possible, both to not get attached, and he found their mission childish/foolish. 

He’s rather selfish. There is nothing Levi cares about genuinely more than Isabel’s and Farlan’s lives and the job that will set them up with a good future. Farlan’s advice is the only one’s he takes and the only judgment outside himself that he considers, such as when Farlan asks him to not cause trouble with authority to keep a low profile, but even then he acts stubborn. Levi trusts nobody wholeheartedly except himself (until later in ACWNR).

There’s a cognitive dissonance in him. Growing up, and still as a young adult, Levi’s headspace is marked by fear and uncertainty, with his power as his source of confidence. The first time he kills a Titan (with Isabel and Farlan), he uses too much gas because he refuses to potentially risk his friends’ lives; when the expedition is upcoming, he abruptly tells Farlan and Isabel to find a reason to stay back, and that he’ll complete the dangerous part of the job on his own. 

Levi is full of repressed fear and uncertainty. He hides and/or buries all of it for the sake of self-preservation both emotionally and physically.

Antisocial Personality…?

It’s extremely interesting how a character as selfless, heroic, and empathetic as Levi exhibits antisocial symptoms. I’d even argue that if his childhood was spent entirely without his mother figure, then he might be a dictionary definition of ASPD (Antisocial Personality Disorder).

People with this disorder live day-to-day under the constant assumption that whoever is around them is “out to get them”/searching for a weakness to exploit. Humanity is made up of only prey and predators; morals are completely subjective, perpetuated by the society that surrounds them. This constant need to defend oneself, the effect of the exact trauma the potential sociopath experienced, combined with a muted emotional spectrum, results in a complete disregard of everything, including people outside of themself. They might believe they’re entitled to comfort or admiration, but overall, they’re intensely self-serving, often aggressive, and ruthless. 

Because Levi for instance learned to rely on violence both for “love” and survival, then he might fall on violence to manipulate a person or situation into serving himself. I see reason to believe that Levi could have grown into worse than Kenny’s image if it weren’t for his mother’s influence.

However, the greatest cause for deniability is Levi’s wide emotional spectrum (especially including empathy and shame), while a lack of shame is the most significant marker of ASPD . (It is arguably one of many testaments to his strength that a victim of so much suffering, violence, and cruelty could become a man as empathetic as him.) 

However, these tendencies may still be relevant: A sense of arrogance—both to the way Levi thinks of some who he perceives as weak and live without good morals—lacking issue with using deceit or violence to attain a goal, and living outside the rule of authority.

I go into more detail about this idea here.

Conclusion

As is true in general, there’s very little to say of mental development once someone has reached their early–mid-twenties. What we know of Levi’s young adulthood does reinforce his fear of abandonment, but he finds a cause where his strength and compassion can be “put to good use” and give to him a life that is worth living.

Conclusion: the ‘Present’/Diagnoses Overview

C-PTSD (Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder)

Levi’s emotional dysregulation (i.e., inability to sit with and process negative emotions), his difficulties in relationships, insomnia, negative worldview, absent sense of self, and finally, his persistent sense of unworthiness/worthlessness are all indicative of C-PTSD. It’s distinct from PTSD in that he didn’t endure one short-term traumatizing event, but he grew up surrounded by trauma and saw it as normal (e.g., gang violence, extreme poverty, death of a parent, (more presumably) physically and emotionally abusive parental figure). Levi as a child developed no understanding of a nurturing, secure environment. 

Negative/Absent Sense of Self

I’ve talked about this at length already, but it’s worth noting how Levi’s perception of himself must have changed when it was revealed that he is extremely strong physically not from his own efforts as much, but because he’s an Ackerman. 

His self-confidence and self-worth have always been built on the foundation of his strength. He’s useful if he’s strong, so he’s worthy if he’s strong. Along with the extreme high pressure his goal to kill Zeke put on him in season four, he might have gone to extreme measures to compensate for his strength he might have felt was “unearned” (such as excessive exercise for example). This is an aside, but it was a blow to him for sure.

Emotional Dysregulation

The causes of emotional dysregulation generally which he experienced are as follows: early childhood trauma, feelings ignored, judged, or invalidated at a young age, and physical and emotional child neglect. Beyond his first four years of life with his mother, Levi experienced all these things (early exposure to sex and likely exposure to domestic violence aside). 

It’s important to focus on emotional neglect specifically, when any and all perceived “weakness”, no matter how small, is unacceptable to Levi. He will never ask for help (being independent to a fault), he can’t define or process his emotions, and it doesn’t occur to him—and it could be a shock—when he learns that his friends care about him, not him insofar as how useful he is. 

As an adult, Levi appears to be emotionally mature, but I argue that this isn’t the case. It’s more accurate to say that he has better control over his emotions (in that he buries them or ignores them) with a mature outlook because of all his experiences with suffering.

Similarly, he’s not outwardly emotional not because he’s antisocial (as related to ASPD, not introversion), but because he’s so “emotionally constipated” that he’s numbed the vast majority of the time.

Relationship Issues + Fear of Abandonment

Because of his fear of abandonment and impaired emotional intelligence in close relational conflict, he’s extremely passive and/or passive aggressive. In order to avoid potential abandonment, he doesn’t go out of his way to win major arguments—such as threatening to break Erwin’s legs if he didn’t stay away from the expedition in season three, but ultimately giving in. He’s also more likely to sneak petty insults into arguments, give “silent treatment”, slam doors, etc. His kindness and exceptional empathy shouldn’t let him be physically or overly violent.

These are likely additions to why Levi doesn’t foster many close relationships.

Fittingly, as a child I thought that Levi might have had an anxious attachment style (clingy, excessive need for security), but as this possibility for security was removed entirely, and he was taught to not rely on others, he would develop more of an overt avoidant attachment in adulthood in combination (fearful-avoidant): making very few emotional demands—even though he has needs—withdrawing when there’s conflict, acting aloof yet fearing abandonment, having difficulty expressing emotions he feels intensely, and fear of depending on someone else.

Anxiety

His cool-headedness even in the heat of battle/war (other factors like experience aside) is exactly what you would expect from someone diagnosed with C-PTSD; he’s accustomed to chronic high-stress. But small stressors (i.e., a change of plans) are overwhelming and make him quick to anger/excessive annoyance.

OCD

Emotional dysregulation is also closely associated with OCD.

OCD is much much more than being concerned with keeping clean or organized. OCD is an anxiety disorder composed of anxiety-related obsessions and compulsions, such as frequent and disturbing thoughts or images (intrusive thoughts). These attempt to be managed through rituals (i.e., handwashing, counting in patterns). Although symptoms will fluctuate with anxiety, OCD at its baseline is a distressing disorder.

Since he was young, Levi should have had an incessant need to be in control at all times. A shining example of this is his mother’s death, an incident he couldn’t control but included dirtiness/disease as a cause he could pinpoint, so this anxiety with dirtiness becomes a major obsession, and the compulsion is cleaning. (Putting aside the fact that Levi enjoys cleaning by itself too.)

It’s a widely-held belief that if Levi has OCD, it’s contamination OCD, as it specifically has to do with an obsession with dirtiness and a compulsion in cleaning (i.e., damaging handwashing, ritualized bathing that may take hours). However, based on the multitude of times Levi was covered in blood and remained unbothered by it (Titan and human), and in fact the obsession’s lack of relevance entirely during urgent missions/situations, contamination OCD is simply not plausible. Instead, it’s general OCD.

There’s no way to know for sure, but I don’t see his OCD as mild or severe. Levi is an extremely orderly and balanced person, so it can be concluded he must have things done a certain way, routinely, organizational, or planned; when the dirtiness is “negative” (i.e., Titan blood, blood on a knife he used to kill Isabel’s attackers), he is never more rigid with cleanliness; it’s probable he suffers intrusive thoughts (likely of the violent nature), a fear of contamination, and/or counting ritualistically, but the most obvious compulsion is cleaning. He might have sensory issues, such as disgust if he happens to brush shoulders with a stranger; aversion to particularly bright lights, irrational rage towards “mouth sounds” (i.e., chewing, coughing, swallowing), etc.

EDNOS (Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified)

Levi should have a complicated relationship with food to say the least. 

In the realm of eating disorders, EDNOS is sort of a catch-all term when an individual doesn’t qualify for the diagnostic criteria of anorexia or bulimia, and it encompasses lesser-known eating disorders like Pica. It’s the most common diagnosis for clinical eating disorders.

I already covered how integral the early years of life are, and beginning at a young age, if children aren’t given a basic need like food, and they must seek out food on their own, it becomes an anxiety deeply rooted in the brain regardless of how well-fed they are when they’re older. There will always be an urge to have food available. Levi’s years in the Underground were spent either actively starving, or going about every single day having acquiring food as top priority. He was a young adult when he left, so it’s impossible to unlearn this (without extensive therapy, which Levi doesn’t seek). It’s similar to compulsions found in OCD: even though he logically knows that there will be a dinner after lunch, it’s impossible to put aside this worry. 

That may mean always having food stashed, eating too much—especially in his early years Aboveground when he’d eat as much food in a day than he’d eat in a week Underground— stealing food, or eating way too quickly (as someone who lived in a place where food was considered something of a luxury resource and threatened being stolen at any time).

The latter factor contributes to Levi’s suggested preference to only eat alone—joining the fact that Levi only eats with Erwin after expeditions. Eating in front of others should be considered a weakness to him.

As time passes with this easy access to food, combined with his extremely narrow sense of what makes him “good enough”, his relationship with eating may become toxic. Especially when the stakes of his worthiness are so high—literally life and death. He may think that he’s privileged to eat at all, and when he feels worthless, he restricts himself from that “privilege”. 

He may be so accustomed to the feeling of hunger, that it doesn’t immediately register with his mind when he is hungry.

Lastly, he may have a generally low appetite. This is often associated with depression, but depression is comorbid with C-PTSD.

Misc.

Some tangents/miscellaneous speculation about Levi’s psychology:

Queer?

Sexuality is formed and shifts due to a wide variety of factors, which most if not all are terribly understudied: genetics, hormones, and your environment/experiences. So again, my speculation.

With his fear of close relationships and negative experiences with sex, I think he should land somewhere on the queer spectrum, specifically under the asexual or aromantic umbrella (i.e., pansexuality/being panromantic (attraction to personality) and demisexuality/being demiromantic (attraction only to those he has an emotional connection to)).

MDD

The odds of Levi having MDD (major depressive disorder/clinical depression) are iffy. Most if not all of the symptoms are comorbid with childhood trauma and C-PTSD: Such as persistent apathy, guilt, and/or discontent; sleeping too much or too little; lack of energy; reduced or heightened appetite; irritability. 

Oftentimes, depression, C-/PTSD, and related mental illnesses cause unexplained physical pain, such as back pain and occasional tension headaches. “Stress hormones” like adrenaline are built-up in the body, and usually persist without physical therapy and-or medication (Disclaimer this mention is based on nothing more than Levi always standing with at least one hand on his hip).

Body Language

Similar can be said of his body language from a cognitive perspective. The vast majority of the time, Levi has himself closed-off in some way, usually by crossing his arms to protect his chest; a subconscious barrier between oneself and another person.

Also see this official art of Levi asleep.

Afterword

We’ve known it’s not just Levi’s physical strength and skill that makes him the strongest, right? It should take immense mental strength to make it day-by-day dealing with the trauma and issues that he does, but not only has he survived and continues to, but he lives heroically, selflessly, with the wellbeing of everyone around him as a top priority. He buries all of his pain by moving forward always and without exception regardless of how painful the present is. Living with “no regrets” should in mental respects be a guise for pushing his trauma down, too; there’s just no words that can properly do Levi’s resilience justice.

Part of me wants to go into detail about his later adulthood, but given how very little we know (right now), I think it’d be too speculative.

However, based on what we have seen at the ending of AOT, it’s comforting to know and plain to see that Levi wasn’t defeated when he “lost” the reason to be so strong, and even his strength itself; he didn’t lose his love for his friends nor of life. 

In middle age, based on Erikson’s psychosocial stages, the conflict that should enter Levi’s life is the idea of generativity versus stagnation. He seems satisfied with his life despite the negative effects of all he went through—grief, physical disability, inevitable mental scarring—and he’s still concerned with helping others, especially the younger generation in a world after the overwhelming devastation that was the Rumbling.

My speculated psychopathologies/diagnoses of Levi:

C-PTSD (insomnia prevalent)

OCD (contamination obsessions)

EDNOS

#levi aot #snk levi #levi ackerman #levi attack on titan #captain levi #captain levi ackerman #aot levi #aot levi ackerman #attack on titan levi #aot meta #levi heichou #rivaille heichou #levi rivaille #rivaille ackerman #lance corporal rivaille #levi snk #levi.thoughts #aot #attack on titan

[darlingbabyboo]

Can you make a part 2 to the tr x bimbo girlfriend with maybe izana mikey and kazutora if you dont write for them or dont want to its okay have a good day/night<3

I hope you also have a good day/night ૮꒰⸝⸝> ̫ <⸝⸝꒱ა

"Honey, you're my slut!"

♡ More Tokyo Revengers Characters and their bimbo girlfriends ♡

Kazutora Hanemiya

He loves you so much!

Your cute little aesthetic

Your adorable mannerisms

Just everything about you is just so amazing he can't control how much he feels for you

Though that's also the problem...

He just really doesn't get why you're with someone like him

You're just so amazing and he has a lot of insecurities and baggage and you're this pure beacon of light

How could you be with someone like him?

But you make sure to erase any and every negative thought he has

He won't deny that he loves the pampering

"What's that?" Is the question that's he's been asking all afternoon, but it can't be helped, he's just pretty clueless when it comes to the makeup world. He's eager to learn though, especially when you're the one teaching him.

You're focused on your craft, for once, the smarter one in a situation. "It's just mascara, supposed to really make your eyes pop-not that you need it, honestly." You cup his cheek with your hand. "Every part of you is just so beautiful!"

He squirms at your unfiltered praise. "That's not true. I-" You give him a deep kiss, stopping him from spewing any self-hatred.

He knows your lipstick will stain against his lips and he finds that he enjoys the thought of that, being marked by you. He relaxes into the kiss, you make him feel worthy of love.

Manjiro Sano (Bonten Mikey)

Mikey's life is practically defined by how much he's lost

His entire life is filled with grieving for the people that have left him or have passed away

His heart has hardened, and he cares for very little in his life

And you're one of the rare few

Mikey enjoys being with you so much because you just love him unconditionally

He doesn't have to pretend to be someone else or put on a light facade

He can talk about some really dark stuff and you won't be scared of it, no matter how much you probably should be

He also just likes how airy you can be

He finds it endearing, and even if the things you say can be a bit stupid, he always gets a good laugh out of it

You're just his special girl ᰔ☆(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*ᰔ

And god forbid anyone talk about your outfit

He'll destroy them

He always got his girls back

It's one of the few days of relaxation that Mikey gets and he's decided to spend it with you, just cuddled together at home. Due to the nature of his job, you two don't spend a lot of time together, but he cherishes the moments you do get. Right now you're on his lap, perfectly manicured hands typing away at your phone.

"Baby, I want this." He focuses on what you've added to your cart and finds a necklace similar to his tattoo. His lips curl into a smile.

"For me?" You nod your head eagerly and wrap your arms around his neck.

"So when you're off doing all your work, we're still connected."

You look at him with so much love in your eyes, like the 'work' you're brushing off is simply an office job and not committing multiple crimes. He doesn't know what he's done to deserve it, but he knows that you're one of the few good things left in his life. He presses his lips against yours, he's never letting you go.

Izana Kurokawa

He loves you so much okay

Like, his heart is overfilling with how much love he has for you

You're perfect in his eyes

It's amazing how he could be blessed with someone like you

He thinks that you're one of the best things that has ever happened in his life

And for the person that he views as an angel, he doesn't want the rotten world corrupting you

He knows how bad the world can get (first hand experience is a bitch) and he doesn't want that for you

He has a smile on his face for every one of the silly things you say

He throws money at you like it's nothing

Is your biggest hypeman

Only wants the best for his queen ❤

"Pretty I was looking for you!" He hears the click clacking of your heels before he sees you. Instinctively, he opens his arms so that you can catapult inside of them. As you bury your nose in his neck, he restrains the urge to laugh at your pet name. Him, pretty. No one else would dare call the leader of Tenjiku that. But you're... different.

"How was your day princess" Brushing his thumb against your cheek.

"It was fine, but," you jut out your bottom lip, "I really missed you-why haven't I seen you all day! "

"You don't remember? " You furrow your brows at the comment, as you try to recall what he's talking about.

He laughs, a light laugh that doesn't fit what he's saying. "You told me some guys were talking shit about your gorgeous outfit, I dealt with them."

You pull away from him and see that his fists are dripping with blood. You gasp, and he wonders if you're mad at him. If, finally, you're going to leave him like everyone else. But, you've seen his darker side before, surely you won't leave him for something like this.

Proving him right, you clasp your hands around one of his and start to gently kiss each knuckle. "Thank you pretty, you shouldn't have." Your kisses leave behind some lipstick residue but Izana doesn't mind, he watches you in complete awe. He brings up his other hand and cups the side of your face gently. "Anything for you, my queen."

#tokyo revengers fluff #tokyo revengers scenarios #tokyo revengers headcanons #tokyo revengers x reader #kazutora x reader #kazutora fluff #mikey x reader #manjiro x reader #manjiro fluff #mikey fluff #izana x reader #izana fluff #accidentally made myself fall for Izana #tokyo revengers imagines

[cattonicdragon]

Hey I was hoping you could do kintoru,Susie Campbell, mommy long legs,fenghuang and daki with a living voodoo doll reader that can transfer an pain the feel and is extremely hard to kill.Please :)

Kintoru/sama,susie campbell/malice,mommy long legs and daki with a living voodoo doll G/N reader

I literally simp for like half these character r u stalking me or smth💀/j

Unfortunately I havnt watched legends of awesomeness so I dont know how to write fenghuang but I'm going go to watch it when I can if it's on Netflix,I'll update this post once I've done or think I can get her character down :)

Anyways of course!

Not proof read,this took so long my tumblr is lagging and my thumb is aching 💀👍

Kintoru/sama

She is initially shocked apon finding you

A living voodoo doll that is able to transfer someones pain,it sounds like a story you tell kids to scare them honestly.

Not only that but you are insanely hard to kill,every time she has her claws on you,you suddenly evade her and run away.

She finds the situation both amusing and annoying.

She eventually gets to the point where she realises you just wont die

So instead she corners you and questions you

Apon finding out that your not entirely sure how you are what you are she feels almost a sense of familiarity,given the fact that she was created by an eldritch God.

Now you may be wondering,how did kintoru find out you can transfer pain?,you transferred your pain to her when she sliced you.boom.

For some reason,you get stuck in her realm,she literally cant get rid of,she tries multiple times before just accepting your there.

She eventually grows to enjoy your presence and you enjoy hers eventually to.

She loves to just pick you up and hold you close to her.

She refuses to admit that shes cuddling you

So she says holding you

She feels relief knowing that you wont die of old age in all honesty

Kintoru will never admit it but she loves you unconditionally

Should yasu EVER try to take you away she will have zero chill, legit hes standing one second dead the next,she will not loose you.

Unless shes sure you can,she probally wont involve you with the whole cursing an entire family tree thing

She let's you put on her hat if you want to,mainly cause she gets to see the large hat on your head and she finds it amusing.

Susie campbell/malice

She to is shocked at learning about you.

Shed definatly try to pursue you after finding out about your capabilities.

It's rare for someone to not be ink-ified so seeing you only dirty and inky is a shocker,her initial thought was that it was the ink that had turned you into the doll.

The first time she learns about your ability is when she saw you get attacked by one of the ink creatures,one slashes you on the stomach before you quickly transferred the injury back to the culprit and fled.

She definatly took notes.

I can see her attempting to appeal good and maybe even flirting to gain your trust

It isnt until you both unexpectedly get put into a fight with eachother that she learns about how much of a pain you are to kill.

After that encounter she thinks more leisurely now,she dosnt like the fact that you can last longer than practically any of the ink creatures down there -bendy/the ink demon

This somehow transcends into your relationship becoming frenemys

Whenever you cross pass it's a short fight with snarky remarks and offhanded insults being thrown back and forth until one just walks away

You both eventually just sit down with eachother and talk,how does this happen? Idk it just does

She talks about her former life before she became and ink creature whilst sadly looking at herself.

Once the questions are diverted to her and she questions your existence,you reply you just simply dont know

She would question more but she dosnt even know how shes living as an ink creature so she cant talk.

After this I can see her warming up to you and letting you around her area of the studio.

Surprisly she likes pda

She would be ecstatic if you would want to help her become beautiful and gets abit upset if you dont but otherwise understands.

She let's you touch her horns and halo,shes very over protective over you

She keeps you away from the ink demon at any and all costs

She wont let him take you away from her.

If you cant defend yourself she will teach you.

Drawing sessions if you like drawing

Mommy long legs

Due to the fact that she is in a factory that literally makes dolls and toys live she wouldnt find it a huge shocker

She seriously dislikes the fact that you can transfer pain,it makes it harder to hunt you down.

Now how did MLL find out about your pain exchange?

Mommy had caught you in a dead ended hallway and was squeezing the life out of you with her elastic plasticky arms,that's when she felt searing pain around her body,it felt like the plastic was squeezing itself and restricting her,

She ended up dropping you as you immediately bolted away from her

She had never taken a chase more seriously

This is also where she learns that your a pain to kill.

You kept ducking in and under pipes and wires as mommy got stuck and tangled,

Not only that but you wernt afraid to take risks as you could pass the pain onto mommy.

This chase probally went on for days before she finally stopped

She would not let go of the fact that you escaped her though,oh.no she wouldnt

She would continuously try and kill you,eachtime another dent,scratch or skudmark appeared on her pink body

It got to the point she literally just broke down,ripping pipes off the wall until you stood against a wall looking at her with bored eyes

She asked what in the world you were and how you could even keep up.

After getting her unsavory answer she ended up just dragging herself further into the factory to calm down,

However you didnt want to leave her alone,and followed her.

Your relationship takes quite abit to bloom since mommy is always shooing you off or holding a rabid wuggy by their cut string above you

After awhile mommy just accepts the fact your staying.

Your relationship once she accepts you not going anywhere improves and you eventually manage to get along

Best cuddles

I'm pretty sure that mommy is one of the more feared toys in the factory so you dont have much to worry about

Mommy scares the other toys into playing nice with you.

I headcanon that boxy is mommy's favorite,because I can,so you get amazing cuddle from an elastic toy and a fluffy box

Sweet with you and murderous with others,couple goals

Once player enters the factory I dnt think mommy would care,shed take poppy have abit of fun.

But,if the player shows succession shed kill him instantly

She finally has someone who loves her and shes not gonna let some old employee ruin it

As for poppy it's just more company for you.

The minute poppy starts to try get you to leave though.

You may find a partially toy absent

Daki

Shes really shocked,alot of things can happen when you change into a demon,but your not a demon?

She emidatly tries to get rid of you

She dosnt want someone one upping her place as upper6

She finds out pretty quickly that you can transfer pain and that your not easily kill-able

It's not until she feels as if her obis have slashed her torso that she kneels over slightly,she checks and her eyes widen as she sees deep cuts in the same positions that she had aimed on your body,mirrored onto her.

After seeing that you no longer had any cuts she came to the conclusion that you could transfer pain,once coming across this discovery she fled

She didnt want to be seen as weak but she didnt want to be killed of by someone who isnt even a demon slayer

She starts to think that your actually a hashira until she feels your aura again,your not your literally not even a demon slayer

She wonders how on earth your alive

She has so many unanswered questions

This list only piles up the more she thinks about it

She eventually traps you in her obi,asking questions and demanding answers

She gets extremely confused and rather angry when you tell her you have no idea how the fuck your even alive

She decides to make a deal with you,she brings you back to the red light district as her "apprentice" and you live,if you decline you die.

Although you know she probally wouldnt be able to kill you,you humor her and decide to go.

This is how you both start to bond

Snarky remarks are often when the two of you are in the same room

Her obi is actually really soft and nice to cuddle with,when your not trapped or being sliced with it

She let's you trace the patterns on it if you wish to.

If you want to do so with the cracks and flowers aswell she'll let you

She loves to do makeup on you or dress up etc

She actually likes giving you personalized gifts aswell as recovering them.

She very affectionate in private,in public shes alright with affection but not as much as in private

Due to the fact you keep daki busy muzan gives you his cursed blessing,he has made it very clear that no harm is to come to you whilst you are in a relationship with her.

Gyuutaro comes in the package with daki

Gyuutaro is rather easy to handle,tell him something positive about his appearance,give him a personalized gift or a slice of affection and that's all he needs

#cattonic writes #kintoru #sama #the mimic roblox #kintoru x reader #sama x reader #the mimic x reader #susie campbell #susie campbell x reader #alice angel #alice angel x reader #poppy playtime #poppy playtime x reader #mommy long legs x reader #mommy long legs #daki #demon slayer fluff #daki x reader #x reader

[eunkitarot]

Sunghoon As a boyfriend tarot read by Eunki Tarot .

Judgement: As a bf , Sunghoon would be someone that is very insightful. So for example he can sense if something is off with you. Even if you say you are okay but you are actually not . He knows. You can't lie to him. He also is the kind that spends a lot of time thinking abt the relationship. Thinking about how he can make adjustments in the relationship to make it work for the both of you. Constantly trying to find ways to improve the relationship, whether it being in terms of communication or in terms of time spent together. He would find the flaws and try to work on it.

3 of wands:with this card, the person that sunghoon chooses to be with , he knows is someone that he could be confident in. So now that he is together with them, he looks forward to a future together. As a bf he is future-oriented and likes to have a plan. So Sunghoon would fit you within his life plan, and would want to create a future together with you. He is excited to bring it to the next level. Possibily a higher commitment like engagement or marriage. He don't delay once he thinks he found the one. He will put the ring on it. He is a very traditional person. So marriage is up his alley.

Knight of wands: as a bf even though sunghoon seems so logical, or serious at times. He would be very passionate as a lover. Sometimes it feels almost like obsession because of how passionate he can be. With the knight of wands, he sees himself as your knight in shining armor, and he will do anything to protect you and your honor. However, this also means that Sunghoon can be impulsive at times. His recklessness and rash nature can cause issues in the relationship. This is something he needs to work on. Im sensing jealousy and possesiveness, he gets jealous and possessive very easily. 'Its my person, why are you getting close to them?' Something along this line. Also with this energy, its very volatile and extreme. He can be extremely passionate and suddenly become extremely detached.

The Hermit: as a bf, Sunghoon's me time is very important to him. He needs time to be able to recharge. As an introvert, i can relate. He can't keep on going without having this solo breaks. Where he can chill alone with himself. He needs a a lot of space, if he don't get this, he would feel very suffocated and overwhelmed. He dont hate his partner or anything, this is him personally. On the downside, this card may be intreprated that even though he wants a deep connection with his partner, there is a side of him that is also scared because he don’t want to feel vulnerable. However he has to know, that in a relationship, it is important that he learns to open up and let his gaurd down. That it is okay to show you weaknesses to your partner.

Overall Energy/ Bottom of Deck: The Empress. Overall As a bf he would be someone that cares about you deeply and loves you unconditionally. He would be down for commitment. Even though this card is feminine energy, i think it suits Sunghoon so much bcs is he is someone that is graceful and elegant. Someone that is loving and loyal to the people he loves. The empress is also someone that not only desires their partner in a familial sense it could also be in terms of eros. In terms of sexual needs. I can see him as someone that wants to have lineage.

As you can see we go from a boyfriend reading to husband reading😭. Bcs thats just how Sunghoon is. He would love to be husband material than bf material. Even the pov change😭

Anyways i hope u enjoy my read. Dont forget to like and share my page 💗🫶

#enhypen #enhypen tarot #kpop tarot #enhypen sunghoon #enhypen ideal type

[qprsmackdown]

c!Emerald duo propaganda:

Let me tell you. We've got two guys. They live together. They live miles away from everyone else but they live in a little cabin in the snow together. They would die for each other. One HAS died for the other. One is in a monogamous relationship with the personification of death and the other is one of the most widely headcanoned aroace characters and it in no way ever devalues what is considered as one of the most unshakable relationships in the story

"For you the world" — Technoblade to Philza. They are so loyal to each other, legit the healthiest and strongest relationship in the fandom

"For you, the world, Phil." -Technoblade "Sometimes one friend is all you need." -Technoblade “I’m following Techno to the gates of hell... and if he wants to take over the world, god dammit I’m gonna help this man.” - Philza “I followed him to the ends of the earth, through fire and flames.“ - Philza (about Technoblade)

They live together. They kill together. They're raising a polar bear and a very anxious enderman hybrid. They committed so many war crimes and looked good doing it<3 "For you, the world" quote my beloved. Anarchism swag😎

Silly guys of all time! They took over the entire world together once <3 (pre-dsmp but still canon to dsmp) they blew up a country together <3 gotta love 2 guys who commit Literal Actual warcrimes. Also the way they trust eachother just unconditionally is just soo ouuuugggghghhhh i love them. iirc I remember a part where techno was basically just talking about how he'll basically never trust anyone again. TO Phil. Who was very obviously an unspoken exception to the "never trusting anyone" thing. It's been a while so idk if I remember it right but aaaouuuugggg their relationship was so good. Also "for you the world phil" AAAAAUUUUUUU (although the context of that line is much sillier than people usually remember but they are silly guys <3). Ooouugghhh I have so much I could talk about but it's late so I can't think of it right now but they are sooooooo important they are everything to me. This is kinda bad propaganda bc I don't know if I'm even remembering things right and am vaguely incorrect but AUGH. EMERALDDUO

Consider: the fanon immortals being very old friends thing which is a trope i will never not love, and also taking over the world with your qpp is so pogchamp of them

Two anarchist immortals who have been besties for an indeterminable amount of time, but at least for hundreds of years. Took over the Earth once just to show that they can. Back-To-Back Badasses. Each other's consciences and also enablers. Lived together in the middle of nowhere tundra biome, in connected little cottages with their bazillion pets.

THOSE BITCHES WERE LIVING IN THE ARCTIC TOGETHER IN THEIR GAY LITTLE COTTAGE WITH LIKE 100 ANIMALS!!!! They’d both often talk about how they’d kill and die for one another, they’ve been together for centuries despite Techno being all but confirmed Aroace and Philza being married to someone else!! I think they definitely had a QPR going on because like. The person you’re closest to and have lived alongside for god knows how long u gotta at least have SOMETHING going on there imo.

They are both imortal livelong best friends who have been there for each other through war and and other personal hardships They are partners in crime, both arnarchists who took down a nation together and both live in retirement together They only trust each other wholeheartedly (aka they both belive the other wont betray them) and Phil is the only person Techno feels he can be himself around (aka be soft around).

Apparently their qpr had drama in the past bc of this one fic but tbh i dont really get why These two are literally just. The best. There's absolutely no romance between them, but they're the closest of friends, and they care about each other so so much. And they deserve all the things. They live together in a house in the arctic in a commune for anarchists. Basically everyone in the Syndicate are their adopted children. 'For you, the world, Phil' -Technoblade (Just like to say this too, Techno is not Phil's son in the DSMP universe. It's been canonically confirmed.)

They’re two dudes who spend all their time together, built their houses next to each other (and connected it w a bridge), started a commune together, took over the world together, have FRIENDSHIP EMERALDS, and are genuinely such good friends (these are the characters but the irl guys were really good friends until techno died too)

Just a bird and his pig chilling as kings

"for you phil, the world" is treated like this big dramatic line as they take over smpearth but in context its bc they were arguing over something silly and techno laughed and conceded to him and like... just look at then they're ride or die besties emerald duo ftw (on a sadder note i constantly see philza wearing techno's merch on streams and videos and just... man i miss seeing them together)

immortal warriors who have promised to follow each other to the ends of the earth, through fire and flames. they are each others most trusted person without a doubt. when trying to retire from the wars that plagued the server, they both retired in an arctic tundra where they lived together.

These guys cant be seperate from each other anymore than like three days. Like, on top of also doing the antarctic empire together in earthSMP, they just moved to the arctic together to just enjoy life and retirement together. They understand each other like no other bc they've known each other forever. Also bc if we take the titles of bloodgod and angel of death literally you get something something being willing to spend eternity with the other because you care abt them. These two are fine being isolated from everybody else and chilling on their own bc thats all they need

Their relationship is defined by a connection that has lasted for centuries. Despite everything, they always go back to each other. They live together in a cabin in the arctic. They also like murdering together a little too much.

old men committed terrorism and then they settled down :)

For you Phil, the world Immortal best friends spend thousands of years together, conquer the world, found a empire. Phil has a kid with his goddess wife, Techno wind up joining the kids rebellion against the country he founded. When that goes wrong they start a commune called the Syndicate. They are so ride or die. I love them

please they live together theyre best friends theyre immortal together they love each other and phil is married to a god PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

#propaganda #c!emerald propaganda #they have also done really well in the retirement home poll i know that

[hangeslefteye]

Sugar Daddy HC's for Zeke and Reiner (MİNORS CAUTİON)

I can't believe I'm simping over blond men I have always been a brunet person but this duo is just.. uffff <3 I got sugar daddy headcanons for ZEKE and REİNER because in a MODERN!au where they have money they are most likely to look for a sugar baby :D

Zeke: (Emotionally unstable daddy)

Most likely to met with his sugar baby in a insider event such as a private life club meeting etc.Fast to get to point of what he wants: Your companionship.He just wants a companion to ease his loneliness and someone to show around hooked onto his arm <3 Quite generous, at this point you can get whatever you want.Dresses?Shoes?Bags?Makeup? You can have it all from the best brands all you need to do is to ask for.He just wants to spoil you rotten <3 Just make sure to thank him properly like a good girl does and be reactive.

He loves the thrill of seeing you suprised and cherished.But be careful because he isn't afraid to call you out if you get too greedy too soon.'Tck tck tck... somebody is being a little ungrateful lately,is this what a good girl does?' DONT EVER EXPECT to get into his head to make him spend more than he's willing to.He's still very smart and can sense your manipulation from a mile away.And good things does not happen when he does.Women simply does not break his into his brain.Don't take advantage of his kind intentions and be a good girl for your already very generous daddy.

Only down side of his is that he's İNCREDİBLY secretive.You might even don't know what he does to get this filty rich which worries you crazy even his friends just...feels wrong?He'll just shush you gently if you try to ask.You often see him lost in thoughts.Are they about job?Is he okay?What is he even thinking??You simply don't get to take a peek of his inner world so better be grateful for the soft exterior he wants to show you and don't shove your nose into daddy's business.

Zeke doesn't necessarily expect sex,it isn't included in the deal package but %100 will tease you just for his own enjoyment.If you were to play along he's very cherished <3 Yet this doesn't mean he'll give you whatever you want, whenever you want.His sexual spoilings does not come unconditionally like anything fancy you own.You have to DESERVE it.You can start with kindly asking your daddy and use your big girl words when you do so.Even then he wants to hear more of your pleas 'Are you sure sweetie?Is this where you want it?Were you a good girl today?Use your words with me.'If lately you behaved like he wants you to, you can have your DESERVED orgasm.Make sure to thank your considerate daddy to not to misbehave.Yet he must punish you if you were to do so.His favorite punishment is edging and orgasm control.Which can last HOURS if he's not convinced that you regret your misbehaviour.'You think you can fool me with your crocidile tears?I'm not that stupid dear.Yeah,yeah you are sincere...sure.'He can go anywhere from making you use his thigh to his shoes or maybe just USE YOU as a cock warmer only to edge you for hours with no orgasm.At such times you simply can't believe the control he has both over you and himself.If you piss him off enough he might slap you gently but chokes are for good girls.

His aftercare is all about his mood swings.He can simply just cuddle with you to kiss away your tears 'You are such a good girl for daddy.Well done, sweetie' Or he can just get dressed and walk away to leave you all by yourself which would make anyone feel degraded and vulnerable.It will take some time until you understand his sudden cold attitude and swings.

Reiner: (Depressed Daddy)

He's most likely to met his sugar baby on a safe distance where he can adore them but they can't come close.His baby can be a singer or a performer he saw at a low end cabaret.He'll come to see them every.single.night when they perform and he gets lost at the image of them high key transfixed.He tries to hold himself back from making a move but ends up with sending real fancy gifts to your backstage.Flowers,hand made jeweleries,anything designer and expensive, with no name on it?Who wouldn't wonder such a mysterious fan??Yet It's hard to unsee a 190 brute looking at you like you are the very first woman his hazel eyes ever seen.Even when the first move comes from his dear baby he's astonished.He would do his hardest to stay away because he does not deserve you yet he took a taste of your sweet words and can't let you go now.He knows it's selfish but he wants you all to himself so impossibly no one close to him ever knows about you, let alone him showing you off.You are super secretive like anything about him.

In the mean time he'll do everything to be worthy enough for his sugar baby.He'll spoil you rotten not only with riches but with meaningful gifts aswell such as photo albums,flowers,your favorite drinks,foods etc.He keeps them all in his mind.Thinks very hard on what pleases you.Overall VERY thoughtful and caring.İf you decide to misbehave %100 can see through your greedines but he will stay silent just to have you by his side.After all you deserve a better daddy anyways.You won't understant whats pulling him down so far.

Because he lies to you about his job.Maybe by telling he has a real estate agency or so.But you never met with his coworkers?Is it really what he does?Does all the riches come from there??You don't get to have a peek into your daddy's life by any meanings.He is super secretive and you don't even get to ask him.He'll shush you in a cold manner you are not used to.'Don't ask questions you can't handle the answers of' and this could be the end of your inquires.İf you insist he will break your heart on purpose to pull himself back.Things shouldn't have gotten here anyways.He must keep his baby safe from the guilt trap he fell no matter what.

Things get steamy and passionate fast with his princess YET due to 'not worthy enough' feeling he keeps himself away from having sex or anything too intimate.He always pulls back just when you are almost hurt with needines you two share.All because he's sure you wouldn't stick by his side if you knew more.He doesn't want you to regret later or get more emotionally attached.But this doesn't change the fact that he's TOUCH STARVED and if you can find the right moment of his barriers crackling, you can make it into his brain which will make him fall apart.But he has his methods.

Such as secretly masturbating to your sleeping form.Which worked well for him until one night he's edged enough to get his brains fried and can't think anymore.He gently woke you up with his gruff voice.'Wake up princess.Daddy has one last gift for you.'Next thing you knew is his mouth over your pussy as his hands held your thighs open.He takes his sweet sweet time to be gentle which drives you crazy,also won't let you be hasty with your own movements.Always keeps his hands on your hips to control the pace.'Keep it slow princess.You will hurt yourself' Reason of his overwhelming control could be to make himself last aswell.He just wants to savor it as much as he can.

As for aftercare it's him that needs one.Especially after the very first time he's just broken down in tears and admitting all of his secrets that's been eating him out.If you were to accept him for who he is and agree to be his 7/24 dedicated therapist you will get the kindest,most generous and the most playful daddy ever <3

Afternotes:Reiner is criying again I'm so sorry xD I love him so much but after sex he would literally admit that he's the armored titan and Berthold the colossal IN TEARS XD And Zeke can be a cold bitch when he feels like being one but do I love him for that???????

#attack on titan headcanons #attack on titan imagine #attack on titan scenarios #attack on titan x you #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #shingeki no kyoujin x reader #shingeki no kyoujin headcanons #zeke x reader #zeke yeager #zeke jaeger #zeke jeager smut #zeke jeager x reader #reiner brainrot #reiner braun #reiner x reader #reiner aot #reiner x y/n #attack on titan reiner #reiner smut

[suffarustuffaru]

How do you think Subaru and Otto could actually work out like long term relationship work out

INTERESTING QUESTION ANON i think it depends on whats going on with the situations they get into or whats happening in the timeline theyre in but i think ottosuba in any sort of longer term relationship (as friends or romantic partners) would work out in one of several possibilities:

good ending!! they stay good friends for the rest of their lives, resolve all differences, recover a bit from their respective insecurities and traumas over time, and stay close :) otto may or may not get hung up on subaru a bit in the back of his mind (bc he probably wants subaru carnally judging off of the Details that rezero staff keep adding into otto side content) but he’d do his best to move on 👍 and ultimately theyd be happy!! yay happy ending!! this is the best case scenario.

their relationship tragically explodes in their faces due to Too Much Conflict and it may or may not end in some death

Somehow. Against All Odds. In Some Sort of Alternate Universe…. subaru and otto are dating romantically and they always need each other anyway in any universe so im just gonna assume theyd probably get married and be attached at the hip (good ending) or be. you know. their typical codependent selves and make each other simultaneously worse and better.

but either way metaphorically i think theyre basically married regardless of how they define their relationship bc they Do need each other. they are staying by each others sides forever if they can help it.

i think in general though if we’re talking more of that main route complicated friendship, imo i think realistically on ottos end there could be somee sort of unrequited romance there (too many little details about ottos attachment to subaru that add up and heavily remind me of rems attachment to subaru). subaru isnt privy to it and neither of them fully know about each other, as much as they do still Know a good amount of things about each other. i think that their current main route dynamic is like i said either gonna end in tragedy or itll be rocky for a while and then eventually end happier.

i dont think theyd get into a romantic relationship ever as they are now in main route unless you mess around with the timeline a bit. ottos otto with his avoidant tendencies and his desire to help subaru as much as possible so of course hes gonna be the type to stand by and be happy for subaru at his wedding or whatever but be dying inside a little knowing itd never be otto there. and subaru shows far more romantic interest in emilia and previously rem obviously, but julius is way up there of course. otto is a best friend but not a lover.

otto fully admits to subarus face that he cant date a woman as he is now bc she wouldnt be his priority. the most important thing to him. bc otto is otto he probably means his career goals (being the emilia camp internal affairs minister and getting his own store) but the line is so open ended it makes total sense imo if he also meant prioritizing the emilia camp in general—especially subaru.

i think otto is currently at that level of clinginess that even if he went to eventually date or marry someone who isnt subaru, he’d still think of subaru. and its not that subaru doesnt want and need and love otto or see him as lesser than subarus other loved ones, bc subaru really really cares about otto and loves him unconditionally, but when you think of who subaru thinks of and turns to first, naturally youre probably thinking of beatrice or emilia or rem or julius. of course every dynamic subaru has with different loved ones of his is special in their own ways, otto included, but otto continually seems to be shadowed when it comes to subaru.

and otto of course knows that. hes not the First to be there for subaru. he knows this the moment he starts interacting with subaru more in arc 3 and 4 and witnesses subaru do so much for emilia. when otto also witnesses emilia caring so much for subaru, excitedly rambling about him to frederica while otto watches quietly and wonders why hes jealous of emisuba’s closeness. otto watches emisuba quietly again and realizes why they care so much for each other, why subaru fights so hard for emilia. otto is bitter when subaru doesnt ask him for help bc otto was there always following in subarus footsteps. otto goes out and risks his life while emisuba argue and then eventually kiss in the tomb. otto watches again as julius’s existence further threatens otto’s insecurity of being useless to his loved ones and julius fits in with emisuba while otto cant.

i do think its interesting to note though that otto of course steps back because he wants subaru happy, and bc he also cares about emilia too—but otto gets defensive with julius for all sorts of reasons. my personal theory is that theres also a sense of loyalty here bc in ottos head, sure hes not gonna be like subaru’s Lady. but ottos the Closest Man in subarus life, right? (until julius comes along after otto spends a year living with and serving subaru.)

its also interesting to think about how this compares to otto if, where the dynamics with ottosuba are slightly reversed all bc otto IS the first person to be close to subaru. otto isnt a dog following at subarus heels in the same way anymore, hes not a shadow—theyre both in the light instead as equals, and instead of otto supporting subarus dream, its subaru supporting ottos dream (of opening a store and running a successful business!! which they kinda did bc they got their own market stand!!). inadvertently theyre also supporting each others Implied dreams: curing their loneliness and having someone at their side who truly cares for them and spends all this time with them. main route ottosuba also support each other of course but theres far more cost with all the trauma theyre going through and the conflicts rising between them that theyre not fully aware of (rbd and both otto and subaru hiding info/parts of themselves away).

in a general long term, ottosuba would have to put everything out in the open and be fully honest with themselves and each other to the best of their ability if they want to still have their friendship by the end of all of this bc all the lies and insecurity is tearing them apart :((

otto and subaru are people who need to be needed. they kind of try to secure love towards them at times by becoming indispensable to other people, they submit to other people with their own insane devotion and theyd go to any lengths.

with ottosuba specifically, otto is the first to die for subaru and reach out to subaru first, even in the white whale loop bc otto goes back for subaru after regretting pushing subaru out of the wagon. subaru knows otto is willing to die for him. subaru in arc 8 thinks about how he needs otto and how it would suck for otto to die, and in general, otto is a source of safety and dependability for him. otto is smart and capable and loyal, he can solve problems that i cant figure out by myself, and i can count on him and tease him. that sort of sentiment. subaru to otto is the first person to actually want otto, the first person to Literally claim otto as his (arc 4 wn subaru joking about otto being “his side toy”, but also the otto’s diary episode where ram calls otto subarus accessory and otto admits he likes it), the first person to actually want otto to stay to the point of hiring otto without his consent, the first person to—like otto with subaru—search for otto first by sending ricardo to save otto from the witch cult.

ottosuba get into a feedback loop where they need to be needed, and they need each other and acknowledge the other has things they dont have (otto’s calculating nature, subaru’s idealism and determination). otto is also different for subaru bc hes someone he can pull along in a way subaru cant with other people his age in his life—otto has to be teased and poked and prodded and pushed and normally subaru doesnt get this sort of role, and otto needs someone who can be pushy like that so he can actually be pushed to admit he Wants Connection. at the same time though, otto leads subaru by the ear, instructing and helping subaru with strategy and demanding subaru turn to him for help, pushing subaru to accept it for once. its a true feedback loop for sure !!

hypothetically speaking if they were in a romantic relationship itd just be like their usual dynamic as friends but with extra steps. theyre as clingy as ever, but either way…. they have issues to get past. and i think itd have to start with otto, bc due to rbd subaru is Incapable Of Talking all that much about that anyway. ;-;; ottos the one whos literally holding back, and he needs to be honest about his general insecurities and try to communicate and admit stuff like “im scared we’re all going to get hurt so i keep wanting to do anything to stop that from happening” or “i feel horrible just not being able to do anything while the rest of you are out risking your lives bc i dont want anything bad to happen to you and i Need to do something to help” or “maybe i just need you to keep needing me so that i know you wont leave me behind again” or “i thought that the only thing i was good for was literally staying in your shadow and doing all the shitty stuff that you cant” (hahaha otto does not know about subarus bad case of stockholm syndrome and dying and being tortured sooo very much ;-;;;;;).

i think itd take a lot of work to get past the current hurdles in their dynamic, especially with rbd making it more messy, especially with subaru not being able to talk about it, especially with ottos Shit probably is gonna hit home for subaru bc hes felt Similar, especially when ottosuba as a dynamic mirrors other ships like emisuba (otto is the subaru, subaru is emilia) and remsuba (codependency and sacrificial tendencies :,) ). so this is all gonna be uncomfortably close to home over and over for subaru, otto is allergic to vulnerability too, and otto is once again in the shadow of everything subaru is so. if they want a healthier dynamic everythings gotta be in the light <33333333333 </33333333

anyway and i think in long term either they fix all their shit or they sort of fix it by being Unhealthily Attached At The Hip At All Times. the latter would just be Extra Codependency Speedrun Any % where its like otto if where they live together and spend time together all the time except if they get separated for two seconds the abandonment issues start showing (that subarus had for a long while but ottos been slowcooking since his backstory). they hear the other needs them for something (this happens often) and immediately drops what theyre doing to run over there. they either fight to sacrifice for each other in weird little cold wars or theyre working scarily in sync bc if one person goes the other Always Follows like a damn guard dog. theyre not a duo, theyre one and the same. ottos control freak ass gets to pull subaru around and Protect him. subaru keeps a close eye on otto and Protects him, but lets otto lead him around as much as subaru likes to push otto’s buttons a bit. its kinda like their pre-arc 6 dynamics but dialled alllllllllll the way up. theyd be like the remsuba sort of sweetness where its unhinged af and most definitely not the healthiest thing in the world but if it works it works right ahahahahahahh…..

i also think in general a romance between ottosuba would be highly domestic yeah but in the old married couple way. very similar to how their friendship is anyway. being simultaneously hopelessly helplessly fond but also so very annoyed but also i see you everyday, so of course im annoyed (i love you). stop drooling on the pillows when you sleep >:<<<< dont stay out of the house for too long. dumbass. idiot. and i think on subarus end for ottosuba romance to start he’d have to 1. recognize ottos feelings are Probably Not Entirely Platonic and 2. i think if subaru did ever gain more Romantic feelings for otto itd be more subtle for him? ottos the one who falls head over heels like hes gonna give himself a concussion, subarus the one who has otto there as this nice constant until subaru realizes one day that he erm Needs and Wants Otto So Very Much. waiiittt a goddamn minute you Like Liked me this whole time????? thats INSANE…. (has never been wanted carnally by another guy before).

anyway i hope that makes sense anon 👍👍 ty for the ask :3 sorry if i answered it a little off bc i misread ur ask or smth ;-; but i hope you enjoyed reading this regardless 👍 anyway have some posts that remind me of them ;-;;;;;; —

#ask #rezero #re:zero #natsuki subaru #otto suwen #a suffaru analysis ask thats a Little shorter than usual? no way akdndn #everyday subaru is an intrinsic part of ottos character and constantly appears in ottos life. Do Not Separate :< #i remember deafknell reading otto side content and telling me that i was onto smth with ottos feelings abt subaru and i rejoiced. now i Know #im not entirely tweaking 👍

[mostlymaudlin]

ooooooh ok juicy sfc posts happening !! i rly honestly truly love to see it. here's my unasked for two cents, as someone who did find the story really hopeful. im posting this not to like, discourse or disagree or discount what im seeing, but to just maybe offer a different pov for ppl who might be trying to file this story away in a less devastating way.

i, of course, think baz deserves better than what he gets from his family. we all deserve to have families that love us unconditionally, and so many of us DONT have that -- including baz. that hurts !! i also think simon didn't deserve to lose his magic, and penny didn't deserve to take on the sole responsibility for keeping simon safe, and agatha didnt deserve to be shoved into every princess/damsel role ppl cast on her, etc etc. 

what i like so much abt this series is that ppl dont get what they deserve, but theyre still okay. its why i also love the end of awtwb -- simons LICH ER ALL Y crying lol. he got a whole mega-bucket of extra trauma dumped on his plate that he hasnt even started to process. but its still so clear that he's got the support he needs to live a good life alongside this terrible knowledge. the mage fucked him over even more than he knew, but he doesnt have to define himself by these terms anymore -- we've seen his growth in this regard.

bazs main arc in the series is about how he sees himself -- in crudely simple terms, he rly wants to be a Good Guy (you know, not a vampire, straight, a good pitch etc etc) but sees himself as cursed with that impossibility. this continues as his idealized Good Guy self develops over the course of the books into something that actually feels more achievable to him and is less reliant on the shit his family put on him growing up. 

the cool thing about snow for christmas is that -- just like when simon finds out abt the mage at the end of awtwb -- we get to see baz's new sense of self tested. we get to see what he's using to draw the lines of morality. and we get to see that while of course he still cares about what his family thinks, and it still causes him anxiety and trauma and all the shitty things that he doesnt deserve -- he has grown from that place where their value system can make him hate himself.

and moreso on the hope part -- the grimms value, above all, the ability to fit into the roles they think theyre supposed to hold. its bullshit, and they've both caused themselves problems and absolutely are fucking up their children. daphne fully had to be saved by a cult bc of it and shes still not over that mindset -- these ppl need therapy lol. so it's def sick n twisted that they're celebrating baz being able to hide better rather than celebrating who baz is, but is this not the utmost sign of love that they're capable of? baz gets to fit in better -- that's all they've ever wanted for him, whether we agree with that or not. baz seems to recognize the balance of this in the story. he narrates the rest of the dinner with a sort of dry, relieved, disbelieving tone. it’s like hes huffing a laugh, shaking his head, thinking, “did i really used to pin so much of myself on this stuff? how silly.” he is not distressed bc he understands his parents, and he has, again, divorced his sense of self from their expectations. so much so tht he says fuck it and gives simon the lil kissy at the end, because THIS is his new value system: he ALWAYS kisses simon goodbye!

so, is this a step forward for the grimms being more supportive parents? yeah, maybe not. maybe it never gets better than baz hiding his fangs at dinner and everyone doing the bare minimum to accept simon's role in baz’s life. that's not what baz and simon deserve. but it could be enough, because simon and baz have different ways that they measure their happiness by. they have each other and penny and shep and ruth and agatha and niamh and every other person they'll meet in the many, many years ahead of them whose opinions they can choose to make important to them, or reject. i love this for them! the true queer hope story imo. thats what i want for myself and for the people i love. 

to be clear: this story made me sob so hard i scared my cats. (im not rly a crier, they did not know what to do). i had to put it down in the middle because i couldnt see the page. any queer person who has Family Shit is bound to get whammied lol. but! i personally find comfort in the idea that we can coexist with people who are important to us but also very difficult to be around, even if its not totally what we deserve. its a very quiet, somber hope -- but that only makes it feel more real to me. 

#snow for christmas #snow for christmas spoilers #idk if we're still doing that hahahha #sfc #ss #a #<my ol simon snow analysis tag LOL been a while

[fleshweavers]

im high and having a fucking. niche embarassing fetish moment. t4t plushie tf ramble under the cut.

i literally cant stop thinking abt being a stuffed animal for my girlfriend. limp, inanimate, soft and warm and while technically non-responsive, you can still look at a plushie and know how much it loves you. i want her to know how much i love her. that she is the center of my world and always at the forefront of my thoughts. i want to belong to her. be there to be held by her, keep her company, make her feel safe.

but also that im her possession. completely at her mercy, she could ignore me completely and leave me in a box somewhere if she wanted to but of course she doesnt. she loves me all the same, im her toy, her little comfort friend, her favorite thing. And she'll bring me almost everywhere because im small enough to fit in any bag. She'll always check that she hasnt forgotten me, make sure to fix me if a seam pops or clean me if i get dirty.

And I would be held so much. I would have patches on me of spots worn thin on my paws by her rubbing my soft fur to stim. She would squeeze and grope me randomly to relieve stress. sit me in her lap when she's playing video games at home. I'd probably smell like her all the time from cuddling while she sleeps.

and i mean. dont let it be subtext. she fucks the plushie. she's as much of a weird autistic furry as i am, of course she fucks the plushie. If I didnt come with a penetrable hole she would add one by sewing a pocket under my tail and shoving a fleshlight in there. She fucks it because it gets her off to use someone something she has absolute power over. something so much smaller than her that loves her unconditionally no matter how brutally she uses it. that only cares about making her feel safe and warm and good. sometimes she fucks it while looking at porn, pumping load after load into its swollen stomach, moaning under her breath about how good it feels. sometimes she lets it cockwarm her while it's in her lap and she's doing something else. often she fucks it under blankets, just letting herself relax after a long day, cumming in her toy and then drifting off to sleep with it in her arms.

#bark bark #t4t nsft #tf #plush tf #furry tf

[angrycowboydreamland]

"I think...I can love you."

Villan paused, eyebrows knitted together.

"What do you mean you can?"

Hero looked across the city's skyline. The sun's rays reflected yellow, pinks, and orange tones across the buildings. Hero smiled, taking in the view. He raised a hand to shield his eyes from the light.

"What I mean is that I see what you dont." Hero said.

He turned back to Villan. His smile deepened.

"I see a partner, someone who understands me." Hero explained. "Someone who understands what my life is truly like."

Villan opened his mouth to speak and then stopped.

"I see a friend," Hero explained. "And as something potential."

"You view me as a project." Villans voice was low and gruff.

"No," Hero shook his head. "I see you as my friend. You've been there for me since forever. You mean more to me than you'll ever know."

Hero studied Villans face. He gazed over every detail. How Villan eyes were full of so much emotion, but his face remained cool. Hero saw the conflict with wanting to believe his words and the fear of Hero living. Hero wished he could do something to soothe Villan to make Villan understand that Hero did care.

"I don't agree with your work or what you do," Hero said.

Villan looked away.

"But I still care for you unconditionally."

"I like how you like sugar in your coffee, I like how you are nice to service workers. I like it when you are sick and watch rom com movies with me, despite believing thier bullshit. I enjoyed it when you did my laundry when I'm injured even when I didn't ask you to. I see how you always give me the best parts of dishes without taking food first for yourself." Hero continued.

Hero swallowed. "I see how kind you are when children talk to you. I know that your favorite color is yellow because it gives you hope. I know that you hate it when it rains because you don't like getting wet. I-"

Hero looked away, his sentence trailing off.

"And I want to get to know you more." He said.

When he looked back up, Villan was staring up at him eyes wide.

"I... didn't realize you knew that much about me." Villan said.

"Do you really want to know me more? How could you love me?" Villan asked.

"Villan," Hero said. "If only you knew how much I want to."

#hero villain prompt #hero x villain #writing #hero and villain #hero #heroes and villains #heroxvillain prompt #prompt #villain #creative writing

[mbat]

i really wanted to try and write like, a thing explaining how i think steven universe future is one of the best portrayals (and my personal favorite) of mental illness in media, and how i think people misinterpreted it (me included at first, cause my experience over time has given me new perspectives) but i. AAA i literally dont even know if its necessary cause i dont know if people still think it was bad or a bad way to write steven (it wasnt!!) or like any of that, mostly cause. holy shit its just so obvious to me?

like i watch that show and i relate to him so much that i just understand it all and its so obvious to me and i dont know if other people find it. not obvious. like everything is right there in the text laid out i think

the main thing that i saw get misinterpreted when it aired was the second to last episode where steven turns into a fucking kaiju and everyone, again me included, thought that it felt rushed, but everytime i rewatch it i think... no it wasnt, actually. because we see it expecting a big fight or thinking it needs a whole lot to fix, but it doesnt. its not a fight, its someone having a mental breakdown and thinking theyre purely unlovable and evil, but being made to see that they are still lovable and arent evil even after all the bad theyve done, theyre loved unconditionally, and that other stuff mostly really doesnt matter (and hey, it can be fixed/dealt with later, its fine!)

its just my favorite show ever, specifically future! and i really wish other people would see what i see, but do i even need to try..? i didnt really write it very well anyway, but drafts exist for a reason. idk ive just been thinking about it a lot

TL;DR: i adore steven universe future and im wondering if anyone thinks its even necessary for it to be analyzed for people to maybe better understand it/do you think that there are enough people misunderstanding it that it needs a perspective to maybe help be more understood

#genuinely i relate so deeply to him in future #its such a comfort show to me when im having a bad time cause like #he goes through so much and does so much. but everyone still loves him and he gets a therapist and a happily ever after #and it gives me hope. yknow? #i just keep thinking about athena p saying she didnt like steven universe future and im like. GIRL YOUR OPINIONS ARE USUALLY GOOD WHAT #WHY NOT. WHAT IS THERE TO DISLIKE :[ #steven universe #su #steven universe future #steven quartz universe #steven quartz demayo #su steven #steven universe steven #suf #my post #im mostly asking this cause it would be a lot of effort to finish it #ive got a first draft written but its very long #and im planning on turning it into a youtube video. not just posting a long ass essay on tumblr lol #so it would take me writing a second draft. maybe even more until im satisfied- #then id have to read it all out loud. and then make a drawing for the background video cause i #PHONE ISTG #cause thats just what i have in mind #then id have to edit it all sjfhsjf #its like. i want to. but im so demotivated about it. cause would it even matter #I MEANT FOR THE POLL TO BE LONGER I FORGOT TO CHANGE IT NOOOOO

[prosciuttulipa]

RAAAAAAH i want a match ngl LMAO

Jjk match because Im a fucking simp, and a guy bcs I am in fact a straight woman thanks

I'm a big nerd. Like, a very big nerd. I do math for fun and I am not ashamed at all when I interrupt someone to correct them (I have autism and ADHD, how could you tell?)

I'm relatively closed off, and most of the time, insecure. I'm shy and I barely ever make the first move (unless I've had a couple of drinks or a lot of eyeliner). I think what people most define me as is the "old soul, young body). I'm like the mom of the group, though I am absolutely reckless when there's another mom in the group, since it takes the responsibility away from me.

I hate going out, and it's really hard to get me to go to the beach, for example. I think my best quality personality-wise is that I'm down to earth and realistic about my goals. A problem is probably how much self-doubt I have, since people constantly tell me I am capable of achieving more than I think I can. I don't settle for seconds, but I'm not too excited when I rech first, because there's always a new competition.

Oh yeah, I'm competitive. Very.

I'm a pessimist, though I like to say it's realism, because why be positive, hype myself up, only for it to go wrong and the disappointment hurt me? As I said, emotionally closed off.

My personality is the infamous black cat, and I think (though I'm not sure), that a golden retriever boy is what would fit me best. (even though I simp for other black cat guys)

For hobbies, I'm boring, though I do have many. I play the guitar, do martial arts (krav maga), draw, sing, write absolutely filthy smut, and, most important of all: do math and study. Yeah, my main hobby is studying.

I'm not sure how I show my love? I don't, usually. I can love someone unconditionally and be absolutely lovesick, but only after a very heavy emotional session, may it be a fight or drinks, will I tell soemone how much they mean to me. I spent the last four years with my best friend, and only after a day's worth of drinking and crying did I tell her how much she meant to me.

I'm a bit icky with physical touch, but if I trust them, I'll let them cling to me. Initially push people away and only after knowing them do I let them hug me, kiss me, cuddle me. I am awful when dealing with compliments, and I cannot take a gift. So probably quality time is my love-receiving language when generally speaking. A boyfriend/husband would probably work with physical touch and words of affirmation, though.

I dont think there's any big turn-off or turn-on in relationships? Maybe not giving me enough attention and helping me emotionally, because I'm easily falling into insecurity, feeling like I'm not enough.

I have like medium curly dark hair and dark eyes. Eyebags, and a lot of moles all over my face. My body is relatively fit? I have a bit of fat ngl but I also have muscles. A bit of a tummy and thicc thighs (they do, in fact, save lives) that double the size when I sit (insecurity alert!) I'm pale, though I am a mixed baby. I dress in all-black most of the time, and all the color variations are like red or dark blue. (I AM NOT EMO). I wear eyeliner from the moment I wake to the moment I sleep and I have pierced ears. I also plan on getting nip piercings and plan on getting

I think i need more songs to listen to, so I'm going with the three songs he associates wit me.

Congratulations! You have been matched with...

Choso Kamo

When people see you and Choso together, they immediately assume that you're just another average emo couple, quick to place stereotypes. But under the heavy eyeliner and dark clothes, are two people who are just trying to figure out life in their own way.

Choso is fascinated by your contradictions: insecure yet quick to correct others, pessimistic but burning with a competitive drive for more. Where some people may see indecision, he sees something much more real and human in comparison to the single-minded characters he's met during his time alive. Living is hard, has experienced it for himself, so he doesn't shun you for your contrasting perspectives. Instead, he wants to learn about the world alongside you, unpicking the way you think, wondering about your insecurities. Although he's been through a lot, there's something inherently innocent and simplistic in the way Choso sees the world. If you're an old soul in a young body, then he's a young soul in an old one. Perhaps by meeting somewhere in the middle, the two of you will get closer to unravelling the mystery that is life.

Choso doesn't mind that you don't like going out, but you often find yourself tagging along as he explores the world in small ways. A trip to the convenience store may as well be a museum visit, with the way he asks you about the products, eyeing them with confusion. He also admires the fact that you study math—to dedicate yourself to understanding anything in such depth is no small feat—and he's happy to sit next to you while you work, occasionally asking questions about your interest in the subject. His most common form of affection is just leaning his head against your shoulder, watching silently as you work.

Dates with Choso are pretty laid back, since he's happy to take the lead on whatever makes you comfortable. It doesn't matter to him where you two are. For him, understanding your mind (and falling in love with the way you think, the way you are) is what matters to him the most.

The Matchmaker's Gift:

Contrary to popular belief, Choso's music taste is rather soft. This song reminds him of the inherent dependence that comes with being connected.

Offering you this song with a curious tilt of his head, Choso asks you if this is how your pessimism feels like.

This is the song Choso uses to confess to you. His feelings are one of the few things he has to his name, and he wants to share them with you.

#—playing matchmaker! #—prosciuttulipa events. #jjk #jujtusu kaisen #jjk matchup #jjk matchups

[uriekukistan]

mutsurie…… and my boy aura……..

for mutsurie :3

when i started shipping it: literally on my first watch during the auction…it makes so much sense idk

my thoughts: when the two emotionally damaged characters who dont trust anyone enough to get close to them trust each other enough to get close 😖 also the fact that urie recognized that mutsuki was afab during the auction and he literally never said anything about it he was just kinda “oh okay” and never treated mutsuki any differently…it’s interesting because mutsuki really idolized sasaki for that same thing but never realized urie did the same thing for him…idk much to think about with that one

what makes me happy about them: see past comment, also they both care for each other unconditionally and i think they both need that because they both kinda care for themselves conditionally if that makes sense.

what makes me sad about them: okay maybe im too angsty rn but i dont think they have a happy ending together, or at least not for a while. like i said, they care for each other unconditionally but care for themselves conditionally, and i think before they can truly be happy together they need time apart to care for themselves…

things done in fanfic that annoys me: when they make mutsuki super emotionally and physically weak so he relies on big strong man in control of his emotions urie to put him back together…like it sometimes feels like its putting mutsuki in this traditionally feminine damsel in distress position and thats kinda ehhhh…also bold of you to assume urie is in control of his emotions or that mutsuki isnt strong or capable.

things i look for in a fanfic: im starving for content so the bar is pretty low….good spelling and grammar is nice :D

who i’d be comfortable with them ending up with, if not each other: i think they’d be better alone if not together…i’ve seem mutsaura floating around recently and while im intrigued i do think it has toxic potential which is interesting to read and think about, but i just want them to be happy 😞 healthy relationships only for my pookies

my happily ever after: they take some time apart like at the end of re where mutsuki is not even in tokyo and they learn their own value as individuals (ideally separate from their jobs) and then they reconnect after that…not that i’m saying you “have to love yourself to love someone else” and i dont think in their time apart they wouldnt still love each other, i just want them to have a happy healthy relationship 😞

who is the big spoon/little spoon: at the beginning urie is definitely big spoon and mutsuki is little spoon, but when they get more comfortable, they switch around sometimes. i think urie really likes being the little spoon…not that he would admit it

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: parallel play, like just comfortable silence and mutsuki’s reading while urie’s painting or something

tbh i dont think that much abt aura so i’ll try my best 😭🙏

how i feel about this character: i like how much i…don’t like him if that makes sense? his decisions irritate me but also they are indicative of how complex he is. interesting guy.

all the people i ship romantically with this character: as aforementioned i have seen mutsaura floating around and i have definitely found it intriguing…may i also propose him with higemaru? they kinda give that opposites black cat golden retriever couple vibe idk maybe im crazy

my non-romantic otp for this character: from the scene where he and mutsuki are trying to intercept touka and miza from extracting kaneki from the dragon, i really liked his interactions with higemaru and hsiao so i like the idea of them as like a besties group idk

my unpopular opinion about this character: im not sure i have one? idk

one thing i wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon: for him to get closure from his aunt that she was okay with working with the ghouls for peace. i know he was told about it by…hsiao i think maybe it was higemaru, but it would have been nice to see him hear it from his aunt. i think he kinda needed it.

my otp: i dont think i really have one 😞

my crossover ship: again i dont really have one, but i can definitely draw parallels between him and geto from jjk…in that they both were so bothered by some tragedy that they both started to walk a very dark path. the difference being that aura’s friends were there to turn him around and (idk if you have or are planning to watch/read jjk but spoiler warning for s2 ep1-6 and jjk0) geto’s friends trusted him so much that when he said he was okay, they believed him and yeah…cutting myself off before i get too far

^could also be the long dark hair and emo vibes that makes me associate aura with geto

a headcanon fact: aura the type of guy to give scary vibes but talk to stray cats in a baby voice on the street…you see a scary man in the alley and you’re about to run away but then you hear “who’s a good kitty? you are! yes you are aweee what a cute baby” that’s him

#tokyo ghoul #tokyo ghoul :re #tgre #quinx squad #urie kuki #tooru mutsuki #shinsanpei aura

[mrs-monaghan]

Thank you for not shying away from discussing Jikook like normal adults or deleting asks or being a coward. You don't hold back and for that you have earned my complete respect. A lot of Jikookers lately can't take the heat. You out here not giving a shit and speaking your mind. Jikook deserve 100% support, even when the hate roles in and the heat gets turned up and you still here. You the real MVP.

This is what I am sick to death of. I am tired of someone posting something Jikook related and so called JKK telling them to delete it because it sets JM up for hate. First of all, fuck you for being a coward. 2nd of all, that is exactly what TKK and Jimin antis and Jikook antis want. They want you not to post stuff related to them. For example, JK brother allowing the photo of Bam and Jikook on his tag. What happened? Cult got mad, started harassing the person, until she deleted the tag. Again, fuck you for being a coward & worrying about being cancelled, instead of proudly standing up for jikook. His brother allowed it. There should not have been any other discussion about it from Jikookers side. Encouraging her to delete it, because it brings hate on JM. Wake the fuck up. Jimin is gonna get hate regardless and so is JIkook. Maybe stand up for him for once and stand up to antis. Setting them up for hate? For what, discussing real moments? real translations? Eat my ass, I will talk about Jikook openly and proudly, because I know even if I don't, they're still gonna get hate and not doing it, gives haters power and I ain't about that life. Jikook doesn't need your fake ass support and coward and run away, the minute you get hate and can't take the heat. You either support them fully and don't back down or get to stepping, they don't need you and we don't either. Weak ass bitches. And no I do not mean posting private stuff and being asked to remove it and you do. That is different. I mean something simple, like take Polyc picture & Jikook on the phonecase. I keep seeing posts today, OMG, delete, delete, Jimin will get hate. You are out of your rabid ass mind if you think I'm gonna put a sticker of Jikook and show it off proudly and you guilt me into deleting. Slap yourself as hard as you can in the face for me, please. You don't fuck me, you don't pay my rent, you are not my mom or my dad. I will do what I want and loving and supporting Jikook unconditionally is what I do. If Jikook still jikook and are unbothered, then I am going to be too and if you are bothered, you are here for you and the clout you receive off supporting Jikook only, esp if you delete cause TKK come after you. Own who you ship or don't call yourself a supporter, its as simple as that. Being a Jikooker is not for the weak or faint of heart. This life isn't cut out for most of you and it shows.

Lack of balls is what makes the vermin run rampant all over twitter. I've noticed Tiktok Jikookers are not scared of them. I've seen a comment with like 50 replies coz a tkkr thought to insert themselves under a Jikook video. YouTube too, Jikookers on YT comments dont seem to be scared of them. Its people on twitter who are so so scared of these people. And now look where we are.

That being said, a Jimin report page recently had to to give up their account because all the Jimin hate was beginning to affect her mentally. So I understand not everyone is as strong. Not everyone can handle confrontation. I totally get that..

But I do feel like if we back eo up, people would feel more confident in not deleting their shit or running into hiding. But we don't fight these people back and so they have gotten over confident. Jikookers need to unite more. Defend more. Like anon, this is how I feel. Tkkrs basically control twitter fandom rn. The few REAL ot7 accounts left that are not undercover tkkrs are terrified of these people. Absolutely terrified. Some translation accounts won't even translate when JK says something about Jimin. That's how bad it is.

Silence is really not the solution here people. I'm afraid its really not.

I am happy though to see them going mental because V is being accused of FS to feed them. They have accused this of Jimin for years but now suddenly they can't take it when its happening to them???

I love it. Get a taste of your own medicine assholes!

#ask shaz #bts ask #the vermin

[peterokii]

Hello 👋!I love ur content(Seroroki is just❤️‍🔥😩) and i hope ur doing well.Jesus bless you❤️🧡💛💚💙🩵💜💅🏾!I see a lot of ur Serorki fanart on Google but I never know that u Tumblr so I create an account just for u,lucky boy😁!And just saying I sont understand ppl that are LGBTQphobic like,it's their choice but pls,show at least some respect.Im very sorry that ur going through this and and some ppl disagree ur choice.We need to respect everyone and their choices in this world bc we have on one life to live.And don't worry about I,pls.I luv u and ur artstyle it just so unique ♡.Stay urself and never change for the other.Ur strong,unique and yourself.And I loooove ur name i wish I had it(I'm a girl but it's okay,I think..?)You just encourage me to draw Seroroki but I'm so lazy and bad😩💀.And dont forget to smile and ur subs will always support you unconditionally.]UR PERFECT AS U ARE REAPEAT W/ ME UR PERFERT AS U AREI hope u read this bye👋♥ (I think I forgot smt,but I don't know!)(thinking)(Oh yeah!kiss kiss <3<3<3)Ppl hate lgbtq are just🥶🤓.AND I KNOW,ITS NOT A QUESTION BUT ANYWAYS

thats nice but.... being trans is not a choice? it's anything but a choice also, people don't get to disagree with my identity. you don't get to disagree with who someone is, it's not "their choice", it's discrimination and hate speech.

your message is well meaning, i can see it, but i hope you'll reconsider these kind of views. hating is not a "oh it's their choice" situation, it affects people for real. it's not a "agree to disagree" matter. it's a "i cant go out without thinking someone is going to see who i am and be agressive based on that". it's a begging everything the cashier doesnt say "maam". it's a "i hope the pharmacist doesnt give me a weird look today".

being trans, or gay, or anything under the LGBTQIA+ umbrella is not a choice. you're right that we deserve respect, but hating us is not a point of view we need to respect in return. it's hate, plain and simple. and hating individuals based on their identity is, once again, not okay. it will never be.

i'm glad you enjoy my work, i truely do. and i dont think you have any bad intentions, but i hope i can explain in the nicest way possible that the matters of LGBTQIA+-phobia is a lot more that just a difference of point of views.

much love.

#ask #lgbtqia #lgbt #trans #transgender