#i don't mind if you take long on your writing it's gonna be epic either way!!!

[rainbowangel110]

Since I’m taking forever on that fic 😩

*dies* AAAADGHJKHCXX THANK YOUUUU 😭 I LOVE IT I LOVE IT I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAA YOU'RE SO AMAZING I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!! 💖💖💖💖

#yooooo I wasn't expecting this !!!!!!!!! Holy crappppppppp #AAAAAAAAAAAAA SHE'S PERFECT 😭 💖 #I LOVE YOU SO MUCH #*gently holds close to my heart* #WHERE ARE THOSE REACTION IMAGES I ALWAYS SEE HERE?! #I NEED ONE 😭 #Just so you know as soon as I saw this in my inbox I immediately ran around the house #flapping my arms and running in place doing a little dance #oh my gosh I love thissssssssssaaa #you really didn't have to #i don't mind if you take long on your writing it's gonna be epic either way!!! #ask #hnnnng I love ittttttttttt #even now I'm still fidgeting around bouncing my feet and hands #not my art #how do you draw so good 😭 #💖💖💖💖 #you're literally the best person ever

[arijensineink]

I have a writer friend discouraged about querying, they're totally inconsolable.

So I thought I'd take this moment to talk about querying and publishing.

While I am not traditionally published (querying Wolfena in 2023, please root for me!) I've been to a couple Futurescapes workshops and therefore have some experience, hands-on, with agents, authors, and editors who gave me some amazing insight into the industry. My long-time writer friend Emily Randolph-Epstein has also spent a lot of time querying, as well as having published a few short stories I workshopped for them. They have also offered me some amazing insights into the industry.

Let's start with the ultimate truth:

QUERYING IS THE LITERAL HARDEST THING YOU WILL EVER DO AS A WRITER

I'm serious. No other aspect of the writing process involves every single facet of who you are as a writer and person as much as querying does.

All the years, money, and energy you spent learning to write, all the hours, tears, and time you spend on that manuscript... now you're going to send that to 50 people, and probably all 50 of them are going to reject your heart-story.

Everyone, you HAVE to go into querying with the right mindset or it WILL destroy you.

Not only do you need to find agents you think might resonate with your book, the agents at Futurescapes emphasized to us that the amount of luck involved is actually insane.

I'm serious. Your manuscript could land on your perfect agent's desk, but maybe the first page includes a huge emotional trigger for them.

Maybe the agent just picked up a manuscript similar to yours yesterday.

Maybe they were just in a bad mood when they read your query letter.

Maybe you forgot to capitalize their name.

It's so hard, you guys. I know a lot of us writers in the 23-33 age bracket are seeing a lot of our peers get picked up by agents and even going all the way to publishing.

But this process is not linear, and I want to emphasize how incredibly, ridiculously, insanely, unbelievably rare it is to publish a successful novel before the age of 30. Please don't think you're running out of time or that your book isn't good enough.

Focus on becoming a better storyteller--that's all you can do. And querying is 100% about storytelling in both the macro and micro, not so much writing. We've all been sucked in to an amazing story with sub-par writing, haven't we? Bad writing can always be corrected, but being the best storyteller you can be is the only path to getting picked up by a literary agent.

My plan is to query The Wolfena for a couple of years and if things are looking dismal, move towards self publishing. And they very well may be dismal. I'm not going to start querying expecting either acceptance or rejection, but rather with a pure neutrality.

Also, keep in mind, the publishing industry is historically sexist, racist, homophobic, and xenophobic. At times I question why we're all so desperate for this approval, anyway (aside from the obvious financial and marketing benefits, but a lot of published authors never make decent income off their books!).

Listen, the moral of this story is: focus on becoming the best writer and storyteller you can be, and don't expect querying to be an epic, grand adventure like the one you just penned. It's gonna hurt, it's gonna suck, but how you deal with it is totally up to you.

My story, your story, it'll get to the people it needs to. Somehow, some way. I promise you that.

K, now go write!!!!!!

#writeblr #writing community #writers of tumblr #queer authors #fantasy authors #queer writers #creative writing #publishing #self publishing #book publishing #writing advice #writing tips #writing motivation

[not-so-mundane-after-all]

Fandom: DC Titans

Title: Acrida

Pairings/Relationships: Dick Grayson & Rachel Roth, Dick Grayson & Donna Troy, Graysonfam, Dickkory

Summary:

The Acrida Protocol, a plan created by the Justice League, required its members to provide immediate aid to those superheroes who would call upon it, especially in the case of time travel.

After a mission gone wrong, Dick and Donna find themselves stranded in 2005. They've been trained for this scenario, they know what to do, they just need to find someone who will fix their time-travel devices and help them get home.

But not before they help a young nurse and a special baby escape a demonic cult chasing them and get to the sanctuary of a convent in Ohio.

This note is long so bear with me

Throughout the process of writing this story, I've had (still have) many complicated, conflicted feelings. And with the show coming to an end, I'll be honest with you. This fic... I almost didn't release it. In fact, there were a couple of times when I almost deleted the whole thing - I'm glad I didn't but I was pretty damn close. Because every time in the recent months when I sat down to write it, I heard this intrusive voice in my head saying "Why the fuck do you even bother? This is not Dickkory, no one's gonna give a shit. Don't waste your time." So I'd close the blank page and let it lay dormant for months until that miniscule spark of hope would tell me it's actually worth it to finish it.

There's a saying about fanfiction that you write it for yourself. For the things you love. And that's true - but there's much more to it. You write it so you can reach others who love the same thing you do, whether it'd be one person or a thousand. But when you see how slowly, that one or a thousand dissipates, already one foot out the door with their focus elsewhere, when the weight on your shoulders gets heavier because you create create create without the ability to for once consume because you come to a pretty scary realization that if it wasn't for you creating, there would be no new fan content for this thing to consume - because no one else is creating, the ao3 tag is dry as hell because no one else but you is writing for this thing anymore, no one else seems to care enough to do so. The whole experience was and still is really alienating and it took me some time to process it, took spilling my guts to the closest people I have within this fandom to actually come to terms with it and start letting it go.

So, this one is for me. A self pat on the back. You did good, you gave your heart and soul to it, it's time to go now. It's me quietly leaving the room full of people turned the other way, busy shouting profanities at a show they love so much because they didn't quite get what they wanted. That's fine. Valid. My heart breaks for you, truly and I wish I could do something about it but unfortunately, I can't. And I understand the frustration, I didn't quite get what I wanted either. A month or two ago I would've been shouting profanities and throwing tomatoes as well. But a wise woman and a dear friend once told me: you gotta remember what house you're in. So, I'm taking what I got and take my leave. Leaving this behind in hopes that maybe, if you decide to read it, it will at the very least help you get your mind off the swirl of emotion in your heart, even if just for a moment.

I'm not going to pretend it's some epic, amazing story. It's an idea that got rooted in my brain right after season 1 (so it's been growing there for 4 years), a tiny seed with nothing but a blurry concept and no details. I tried to commit to it, give it a good plot and I can say that what I came up with isn't that bad. But it's not elaborate, it's just one giant excuse for me to give Dick Grayson a chance to get to know his adopted daughter when she was just a tiny baby, to get to hold her and care for her and play with her, and have a myriad of complicated feelings about the whole experience.

Maybe it's my last Titans fic, maybe it isn't. Time will tell. There's still one Titans-related project I am actually, truly excited about, the sequel we promised and I know it will happen because the story is too precious to me, to us, to not see it through. But other than that... you can catch me over at The Last of Us side of AO3 from now on. Here, I guess it's lights out.

Chapters dropping whenever. I'll try to do it weekly, I have 4 chapters done, probably out of 5 or 6, but I'm still writing and at first I planned to not post anything until the story is finished but tbh I need to get it out of my system. Release it for the world to claim it. There was an option to wait until it's done and just drop the whole thing at once but... fuck it. It's out when it's out. I know I must sound defeated to you, and to some degree I am. But I'm also letting go of all these negative emotions by starting to release this story so I can enjoy the series finale with no heavy weight on my heart, shed some tears of joy instead of sadness or frustration as I say goodbye to my favorite fictional family and go celebrate an incredible run of an incredible show with my closest fandom friends. And I do love this story, I actually wrote some things today that I'm really happy about and excited to share, and I hope that you, if you decide to read it, will love it as well.

I'm not tagging anyone, here at least. I'll share it separately with the people I care about and let them decide what to do with it. If you find it, you decide to read it - great, good to see you, take a seat and enjoy the ride. Hit that subscribe button on AO3 if you want to follow or if you really want to be tagged here, let me know so I can start from chapter 2. If not, well, let's just let it get buried, maybe someone will find it someday.

All that's left for me to do is write a little bit more to finish this story and properly catch up on the fics from my friends, which is a slow process, I know, but I'm getting there.

As always, enjoy.

#dc titans #titans #tv: titans #dcu titans #titans fic #titans s4 #titans season 4 #dick grayson #kory anders #rachel roth #garfield logan #donna troy #graysonfam #dickkory

[atanx]

okay I NEED you to elaborate on your headcanon about kuze being mana’s uncle because I absolutely can see it but I wanna know your context specifically (im @designernishiki btw)

Hi! Thamks for the ask! :3

Okay so admittedly I didnt come up with it myself, but I read it in this and thought yo why the heck not that shits epic?? Just the idea of Kuze having a niece and being a pretty good uncle?? Good shit right there!

I even started writing a little bit, dunno if I'll ever continue it but here:

It starts with his sister. His sweet, shy sister he never really knew, he never really talked to not because they didn't like each other but because she was five years younger and they had virtually nothing in common.

Throughout the years, they'd lost contact, yet, as Kuze's boxing career is falling apart, a letter arrives. Where Akira got his address from, he doesn't have a clue, but he remembers her handwriting.

They meet at Cafe Alps to catch up. He doesn't recognise her in the beginning, but she recognises him.

"Hold her for a second, would you?", Akira shoves her baby into his arms.

"-Oi!", Daisaku complains, mostly because his hands are made for boxing, for hurting, and he most definitely does not know how to take care of a baby.

But Akira leaves to go to the bathroom before he can get another word in.

Daisaku looks down at the potato. Babies are so ugly. They're deformed, weak and disgusting with drool and snot and even less pleasant bodily secretions everywhere. They scream and they're annoying, but - this isn't his baby. This is Akira's baby. He doesn't have the responsibility of having to do everything right. He won't have to suffer through the majority of the baby's tantrums.

The baby's big eyes follow his finger as he boops its little nose. It scrunches up its face in a way he must admit it decently adorable.

"Oh, you got an attitude.", he remarks with amusement. "That's a good thing. I like you."

The baby stretches out its tiny, tiny hand to play with his finger and he lets it.

Daisaku is overcome by wonder. It's so small, so weak and helpless, yet this is a human. This will one day grow up into an adult. What he is holding in his arms is a life. A pure, young, innocent life.

"I see you've become acquainted!", Akira teases him as she sits down, not making a move to take the baby back.

"Aa. It's got spunk."

His sister chuckles.

"What's it's name?", Daisaku asks.

"Kuze Mana.", Akira responds, looking at the baby with a lot of fondness. The little shit starts gnawing on his finger. He lets her.

"Eh? You're not hitched?"

"Nah, she was an accident, but I wanted to keep her."

"Huh."

"So, Daisaku... How have you been holding up?", Akira asks him, tone becoming a tad bit gentler. "I heard about what's happening with your boxing career."

Kuze clicks his tongue. "Don't believe everything you hear. Reason why things are going downhill is that I did something the Championship doesn't like so they're forcing me to lose. Bunch of fuckers."

Akira hums. "And what, you're just going to let them walk all over you?"

"Pf. As if. The reason I started up boxing is because I wanted to fight people stronger than me, not get tossed around by losers I could defeat in my sleep. I could tough it out, but... This isn't about strength or perseverance. Getting back in the bosses' good graces is gonna take a long time and then it's one wrong move and I'm in the doghouse again.", Kuze snorts derisively. "This is more showbiz than boxing. No, I think I'm done with it. Only question is what happens after."

"Do you have a job in mind yet?"

"No. That's most of the problem.", Kuze admits. "Like hell I'm gonna start an office job or anything like that. Don't exactly have qualifications either."

Akira looks him over critically. "I guess so."

"I have received an offer.", Kuze states, staring at the table. "He said my strength and potential was wasted there."

"Eh? Is it the Yakuza?"

Kuze looks up in shock. "How did you know?"

Akira smiles. "I've had a couple of friends who were in there."

"I see.", he states, still uncertain of what she thinks of it.

#sorry for just throwing 600 words of fanfic at you but i just had to share lol #kuze daisaku #yakuza 0 mana #yakuza 0 #I just really like kuze and think he deserves to be in more XD like it would be so funny #also if i remember correctly kuze has canonically interacted with ichiban and ryuji! #So yeah i basically just think it would be very funny (and the FIX IT potential because im always craving fix its) #Id also thought of a fanfic idea where kuze gets out of jail after 8 years and joins the nishikiyama family to get back into #thw yakuza and helps nishiki gets his shit together! And then kiryu gets out of prison and bam! #Majima AND kuze everywhere! Juze gets hit by yet another car!!

[yami-kada]

Mission 2

Recently I read a fanfic on AO3 called Interlude - Class 1-A by @itslivybear and was inspired a bit to write a fic based on that! Well really I got inspiration for a single line (you'll know it when you see it) and then had to write a whole thing to be able to share that one line, but oh well. This is my first time writing a chatfic or even any BNHA content at all, so I hope it doesn't suck! Thanks to @shadesofflame for being an awesome beta!

(Quick FYI in this AU M*neta and Bakugou are replaced with Shinsou and Monoma, sorry for any confusion. Also a name guide can be found at the bottom.)

RockSolid: Um, so.

RockSolid: Remember the missions during the Sports Festival?

PurpleGrape: Oh hell yeah.

PurpleGrape: Still cherish the look on that bastard's face.

Spoderman: jehxgjc Kiri I got it on video!!!

JazzHands: You've had video of the capture of the bounty this whole time and never showed us???

LSD: I thought we were friends Sero!

Spoderman: omg no not that I totally would have shared earlier if i did

Spoderman: im talking about That.

RockSolid: no Sero don't tell them!

RockSolid: it's embarrassing!

PikaCHU: Tell us, tell us!

NYOOM: Kaminari-kun! If Kirishima-kun wishes to keep his privacy, then it is our duty as his classmates to respect that!

Spoderman: ok but consider: he already gave them a major hint and they are about to POUNCE

BreadIsPain: As a witness as well, I must say that Kirishima was si attirant que j'ai failli m'évanouir~*

RockSolid: thanks, I think?

MOMo: To paraphrase Aoyama, he is essentially saying you were very manly, Kirishima!

RockSolid: aw thanks bro!! Don't believe you but thanks!

Spoderman: you take that lack of confidence back I have evidence right here that says you are super fucking manly!

LSD: ok please now we have to know so that we can show Kiri how great he is!!!

MOMo: I must admit that the commentary seen thus far has me rather curious as well.

RockSolid: You guys…

RockSolid: alright then, I'll tell you!

Spoderman: sweet ill pull it up!

RockSolid: bro don't you dare! my story, I get to tell it!

Spoderman: oh yeah of course bro!!

Spoderman: but if after you wanna show it then i am READY.

JazzHands: This is very sweet and all but I am very thirsty for this TEA.

RockSolid: on it!

Kirby: Kiri you've been typing for so long that I'm getting Izuku vibes here.

GreenGrape: Hey!

RockSolid: sorry! this is harder than I thought!

Spoderman: want me to start it off?

RockSolid: you know what, sure.

Spoderman: aight so,

Spoderman: Council, what qualifies as capturing the bounty?

GreenGrape: Guys no the bounty is over please no more bounty-hunting Kacchan.

MOMo: Your objection is noted and overruled, Izuku.

MOMo: For your question, Sero, I do not believe we ever set specific limitations on what qualified, but I was under the impression that it was limited to the Sports Festival. Why do you ask?

Spoderman: just double checking

Spoderman: because my bro here just totally shot both missions out of the park!!!

LSD: gaSP!!!

JazzHands: bOTH?!

RockSolid: no not both!! we have no confirmation for either, technically!

Kirby: Technically? What do you mean by that?

RockSolid: ahhhh ok so Sero and I were eating lunch in the courtyard because it was nice out, right?!

RockSolid: and we were chillin, being bros, birds were singing, all was good.

RockSolid: and then we heard a small explosion before the bounty walked in at the other end of the courtyard and started kicking at the wall.

PikaCHU: omg so angy.

RockSolid: and like fine, we can tune him out, just try to act like he's not there, you know?

RockSolid: But then he started yelling at random people in the courtyard, just acting pissed as hell.

PikaCHU: oMG so ANGY.

RockSolid: and that's just not manly at all, you know? going off on people like that just because you're in a bad mood.

GreenGrape: Yeah… that's Kacchan for you.

RockSolid: so he's making his way around the courtyard now, like everyone needs their daily dose of asshole for him to be happy, and the closer he got the more annoyed I got.

Spoderman: here it comes!

RockSolid: and eventually I get up, because I have had just about enough, and walk right up to him.

RockSolid: he doesn't see me coming, because he was too busy yelling at some girl, and I get right up behind him.

RockSolid: and then I just called out to get his attention, and spun him to face me while making sure I end up between him and the girl.

RockSolid: and well I told him off a little bit and got him to back off then left in a hurry.

RockSolid: and that's it!

Spoderman: oh no you don't

BreadIsPain: Oui! Monsieur Kirishima, you must tell the climax with just as much zest as the build-up!

Spoderman: what he said! no skipping out on the best part!

RockSolid: but!!!

Jacked: No buts, mister. We're all way too invested now for you to back down.

RockSolid: :(

RockSolid: fine! you win!

RockSolid: so uh when I got his attention, I also got my hand onto his shoulder, and used his surprise to knock his feet a bit off balance and pulled him back, but then I ended up with him in my arms and could tell he was about to start yelling so I just…

RockSolid: you know…

RockSolid: flirted?

LSD: oh my GoD this is great!!!

PikaCHU: Hell yeah Kiri! Go get yourself a manz!

RockSolid: I'm not getting a man! He's probably going to kill me the next time he sees me!

Spoderman: i dunno, it took him a good long while to reboot after what you said there

Spoderman: you might have a shot

PurpleGrape: Well if you're not going to get a man out of this, mind telling us what you said so I can bait him next time he tries to be an ass?

RockSolid: uhhh…

RockSolid: I'm nervous.

BreadIsPain: If you will allow me, I shall finish your tale off dazzlingly!

RockSolid: Thanks Aoyama.

BreadIsPain: Bien entendu!

BreadIsPain: While holding him in his arms tightly in a dip, faces inches apart, Monsieur Kirishima leaned impossibly closer to emphasize his point.

RockSolid: oh god I regret everything.

LSD: Hush, it's getting good!

BreadIsPain: With a growl to his voice and his eyes burning above a smirk, he said "You know, you're damn cute when you're angry, but you'd be downright sexy if you shut the fuck up." Then he straightened up to fling the lost soul to the side, and saunter off like the devil was guarding his back, leaving the bounty terribly confused in his wake.

PurpleGrape: Whoa.

PikaCHU: Holy shit?!

RockSolid: what is that description?!?!?!

JazzHands: Kiri that was PERFECT oh my god?!

LSD: It's ART is what it is!

Spoderman: don't forget how red the guy was! Kiri was cool as a cucumber but the other guy couldn't stop blushing after seeing his face!!!

MOMo pinned a message

RockSolid: Yaomomo!!!

MOMo: My apologies, Kirishima, but I felt it only right to ensure easy access to your most manly moment.

LSD: Yeah Kiri! Then one day we can all look back on this and celebrate how everything started!!

RockSolid: How what started???

LSD: E v e r y t h i n g

RockSolid: @Spoderman bro hide me I’m scared.

Spoderman: hey guys, wanna see a GREAT video?

Spoderman: the stars are our main man, Kiri, and the bounty!

PikaCHU: hell yeah!!!

Jacked: Lay it on me.

PurpleGrape: Sure.

JazzHands: Do you really have to ask????

RockSolid: but I already told you what happened!

RockSolid: why do you want to see me being so embarrassing?

PikaCHU: bro we all appreciate you so much of course we want to see you being manly!

LSD: Just from what you all said there is no way you don’t look great in that vid, Kiri!

PikaCHU: gotta give support where support is due!!

PurpleGrape: They’ll all bully Sero into showing them one way or another anyways, might as well give in now.

RockSolid: but...

BreadIsPain: Nous devons vous montrer à quel point vous brillez et dissiper ces pensées douteuses!**

MOMo: I could not have said it better myself, Aoyama!

RockSolid: I don’t even know what he said though?!?!?!?!?!?!

Spoderman: Kiri.

Spoderman: Bro.

Jacked: Well shoot he’s using proper grammar and everything.

Spoderman: Rude.

Spoderman: Anyways Bro.

RockSolid: yeah?

Spoderman: You are epic. This video shows you being epic. And putting an asshole in their place.

Spoderman: You have nothing to be ashamed of, and every reason to be proud. So please let me show the video so that everyone can appreciate you like you deserve bro.

RockSolid: bro…

Spoderman: Bro.

RockSolid: bro -

Spoderman: Bro?

RockSolid: bro!

Spoderman: aight everyone down to the common room its up on the big screen

Spoderman: i have popcorn too

Jacked: Not even gonna question that.

LSD: Finally!!!

JazzHands: Yuss!!!

BreadIsPain: Je vais regarder avec enthousiasme!***

MOMo: As will all of us I’m sure, Aoyama!

RockSolid: Thanks guys!

RockSolid: Now get down here and watch me maybe get a man!

Translations:

*so attractive that I almost swooned.

**We must show you how much you shine, and dispel those self-doubting thoughts!

***I shall excitedly watch!

Guide to names:

GreenGrape - Izuku

PurpleGrape - Hitoshi

CopyCat - Monoma Neito

MOMo - Yaoyorozu Momo

datBoi - Asui Tsuyu

JazzHands - Hagakure Toru

NYOOM - Iida Tenya

SnowWhite - Kouda Kouji

LifeIsPain - Tokoyami Fumikage

BreadIsPain - Aoyama Yuga

Kirby - Uraraka Ochaco

LSD - Ashido Mina

PikaCHU - Kaminari Denki

RockSolid - Kirishima Eijiro

RipHarambe - Ojiro Mashirao

IcyHot - Todoroki Shoto

MuffinMan - Sato Rikido

Octodad - Shouji Mezou

Jacked - Jirou Kyoka

Spoderman - Sero Hanta

#my writing #boku no hero academia #BNHA #fanfic #humor #kiribaku #chat fic #inspired by fanfiction #my hero academia au #my hero academia #crack fic #just slightly #had to redo the formatting because Tumblr removed it :/ #probably ooc but oh well I tried and had fun

[dangoarts]

pinned post for organizational purposes

ugh looks like i'm actually using this account ok cool

hello, am arya/mochi (she/they)

am Adult(tm) (not willingly)

i draw (lots) and write (sometimes)

am violently aroace (sex repulsed)

going to college for game design, gonna become the true epic gamer

socially awkward, may or may not respond if you message me sorri :') (depends on the thing sent and if i panic)

interacts primarily with reblogs, too dumb to like stuff like a normal person /j

only gonna have this one blog, no side accounts because i will forget about their existence, so Everything Will Be On Here

tags and comfort under cut

me things

if you're interested in my all my art stuff, check out #art stuff

if you wanna see just the doodles, check out #dumb doodles

if you wanna see the stuff i tried on, check out #actual good art

if you wanna see me lose my mind, check out #just a ramble

if you wanna see me attempt to be coherent with people, check out #answered rambles

if you wanna see other people's cool stuff, #i will think about this later -> additionally: #art tutorial

if you wanna see my writing, check out #writing stuff

this is my one brain cell described in a video

go check out my fren @currently-simping!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they are rad and is the reason behind half of my ideas

fandom things

will switch between the mountain of fixations i have on a dime (ill)

things i posted a lot in are #deltarune, #batim/#batdr, #pokemon, and #mario tags

i posted a bit in the #cuphead, #a hat in time, #fnaf (security breach exclusive), #kirby, #pizza tower, #lethal company and #minecraft tags

#tron and #epic mickey live in my head rent free and have been since like 2010 (ill)

making #victory au for deltarune (on permanent hiatus because motivation!!!!!!!!!!! bad)

making #blotted au and #golden fins for batim (let's see how far my motivation lets me go) -> blotted au masterpost -> golden fins introductory post

made goofy ahh oc that i love dearly, check out #venposting -> his toyhouse page

since i KEEP LOSING IT, lethal company creature hcs

comfort things

i am ok with most things! am very chill and i do not care as long as it's not drama

fanart/fanworks of my characters/interpretations are one of the best things to ever happen honestly and you'll become my most favorite person if that happens, EXCEPT if it's 18+ (see sex repulsed above)

as with every other artist ever please don't repost my art and claim it as your own or use it for whatever ass backwards thing blockchains are fabricating nowadays, ik it's a cry on deaf ears for people who don't care about the ramifications of taking someone's work they put hours of their life into and yeah i'm aware of the risk i'm taking by sharing art on the internet, but this is something that i made with my own hands so i'd appreciate at least the bare bones amount of credit

i'm dogshit at replying unless it's about something specific, so a lot of messages that just say "hello" or smth one worded end up getting ignored. if it's a question like "omg did you see this thing" or prompts like "hey i also like this" end up getting responses. there's also a good chance i read the message and either forget about its existence or panic and never respond anyway

only two things that make me disintegrate into atoms is nsfw/18+ content and needles. eye contact is uncomfy but not really phobia-levels. i'm semi-ok with horror stuff, but it's a limit i'm still testing out. and ya i ship characters but i really only stick to platonic and romantic fluff stuff and i'm not gonna engage in any ship discourse if u don't like it just block it's not that hard

things i did

sketch requests, is closed atm

thas about it

#ya!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #long post

[lilikags]

Hello hello, hope you're doing well, may I request a matchup please?(hopefully im not late lmao)

Fandom: epic seven

Preference: males

My type : (kayron is my type lmao) harsh on outside mushy as molten chocolate on the inside

Hobbies: art, writing (barely), baking.

Habits:

Drinking too much coffee

I tend to be a bit pushy sometimes

Two moods: do everything way ahead of schedule or do it last minute

Sometimes I'm busy so I'm just like : my medicine sure can wait another hour

I shower with cold water during the winter and when I catch a cold I always go surprised pikachu face like I seriously wasn't the reason

Step 1: go to fridge for snack, step 2: open fridge, step 3: no snack, step 4: go to room, step 5: let 3 minutes pass then do it again as if the fridge is gonna give birth to food

"I'll just draw for 15 minutes then I sleep" proceeds to stay up till 5 am then raise my head up and realise I got a neck cramp from staying in awkward position for too long

Getting a new food bowl for my dog randomly and seeing her question what new entity it is and if it is hostile or not (its funny af to watch sometimes I wake up at 2 am to her barking at a bowl and I start laughing I dont even need to change it I just do it cause her reaction is soo adorable

Its either I sleep with jeans or im a weakling, I'm not a weakling

I always have that one sketch book that I keep locking in a drawer just in case a friend stumbles on it and finds it, in case you are wondering why, its that sketch you don't want anyone to see for very obvious reasons

Thanks as always, take care and enjoy he rest of your day ♡

I match you with...

okay hear me out this is more of a discussion- BUT- he and kayron are the same type of person except this one is has such loyalty to schniel that- anyways, he is like kayron but less violent. yes, that is the main point here. this man understands (logically) why you drink so much coffee but also does not understand (emotionally). he just is always on that schedule. does not mind if you're pushy or anything he's dealt with idiots that almost get themselves badly injured unnecessarily more times than someone just being pushy. he has the patience of like, a dead dinosaur (aka a lot of patience)- unless someone is dying then uh, he'll be rushing to save them. he doesn't understand procrastination. he just does work as it is done and when he is done he moves onto something else there's always something to do. it's a topic to ponder upon (when you procrastinate) he also ponders upon the dog and her new items. it's simply amusing

this man also just like, is a decent cook and will cook when there is no food. he learned decently and didn't find much joy in it but he'd enjoy making it for you. he food he makes does taste good though ngl. if he sees you up late he'll literally shut off your light and say that it's time to sleep. literally, this man makes the decision that it is too late to be awake and simply acts on it. ... no comment on the jeans

ah. yes. that one. tywin pretends it doesnt exist <3

#epic seven #epic 7 #e7

[etherealluminescence]

Hellllloooo!!! Your work is really goood! May I request a little headcanon? I'm an My Hero Academia fan and this concept kind of humored me, I don't know if I should consider this an AU but how would the brothers react to an MC who is a hero in training student with a flashy quirk! You can choose what quirk she gets and feel free to choose any gender, Thank You!

Hey anon! I’m fine with AUs so don’t worry. I’m a major BNHA fan myself, having been a fan for around three years. This kind of excited me because I got to write about the two fandoms I really like together. I’m just gonna do GN! Sorry if the explaination to the quirk is a bit long;;

Retagging because it removed the tags for me**

| MHA!AU | Brothers react to a flashy quirk GN!MC

The quirk is one I’m using for my OC which is a pretty flashy one I would say!! I hope you don’t mind I reference my own OC’s quirk. But it’s :

Gale attraction

A subdivision of air manipulation. The user can suck air towards them, break it apart, send it forwards, all in small or large consistencies, but they have to have something as the center of gravitation, that makes the air get suck towards it, or apart from it. My OC uses a long sword that can curl and compact, and straighten out to become long, so that’s why I consider this quirk flashy, since he slams a large sword at people’s directions and suddenly sends them flying. The MC in here does the same. Ex of how it works : The user uses slams their sword forward facing the opponent, and sucks in the air around them by using the sword as the center of gravitation, and lets it out in one go forward, causing a large blast. It all happens in the span of a few seconds, so it’s hard to see.

Lucifer

Lucifer knew that you had a pretty powerful quirk since you attended UA, you were a third year in class A, according to his documents when he was picking a student. However he couldn’t tell what exactly was your quirk because Diavolo just said to pick your paper and Lucifer couldn’t be bothered anymore.

When you arrived in the devildom you were immediately confused. You thought it was a villain’s quirk, since you were just in a battle, and you began to use your quirk.

Why did the villain’s partner suddenly your their quirk? Did they want to run now? Where are the other heroes who were with you, or did they have other illusions?

You didn’t know who these people were in front of you, but you assumed it was an illusion so you kind of attacked Lucifer with your quirk.

The strong wind expelled out your blade at the speed of light as you swung in his direction. Lucifer managed to transform into his form and stop your quirk from doing damage to him with his wings, but it was just a barely able to.

He didn’t have much time to think, but he thought that you were going to be difficult, and your quirk was actually strong enough to cause him to be pushed back a few centimetres. Wow.

He tried not to be impressed with you, because you cannot act like that in devildom. You were lectured like crazy and Diavolo laughed it all off.

After a few hours Lucifer gave you a simple compliment of “You have a strong quirk, don’t disappoint.” And you were actually feeling pretty proud from that.

Lucifer actually acknowledged you, and told you that he did. He told you that you were strong, even thought he looked like he was going to murder you all day and throughout the meeting.

Mammon

Even though Mammon was your guide, he had no clue you were a quirk user. When he finally hears you say you wish to train your quirk he’s just like?? You have one?

After assuring him you do, he asks to see it. You say your quirk isn’t a toy you can fool around with, and can cause some serious damage.

He thinks about it during the night and finds a way to make money off of it. You want to train... and he can place bets.. he can register you in a tournament where demons fight each other using their power or weapons if that’s their style... and well you could well lose and he takes the money from betting on the demons!!

Mammon explained to you his idea, but left out which side he was betting on. He had zero faith in you since he didn’t know you attended UA, and didn’t know how strong your quirk actually was.

You happily agreed since you figured you could go all out against a demon, since they are tough.

When the first round came, the majority of people bet in the demon’s favor, rather than your’s. You couldn’t care less since you really wanted a good workout.

As soon as the “one” came out of the referee’s mouth, you pulled out your sword and twirled it straight in a matter of seconds, and immediately sent a blast towards the demon’s direction.

The demon formed an “X” shape with his hands and dug his heels into the ground thinking you couldn’t blast him too far if you were just hitting the ground. Maybe your quirk was making the ground shake or something weak.

But what he didn’t see was the giant gust approaching him till it was too late. His eyes were glued shut from the strong blast affect and he was sent flying. He was far out of the rings, and looked like he was bleeding.

Whoops-you-did-not-think-a-demon-would-injure-so-easily

You tried to play it off cool but it was obvious you were frantically worrying about the demon.

At that moment, Mammon was convince to always bet on you. He immediately yelled allowed “That’s my human!” despite not even betting on you at first.

He is overly proud especially when you win since no one can tell what exactly your quirk was, you working way too fast.

He’s always clinging to you now and if someone harasses him he will be like “My human can kick your ass!! Fight me (them) if you want to taste dirt.”

Leviathan

Oh my goodness oh my goodness oh my goodness is this happening.

Levi is internally freaking out when he firsts meets you because you’re a hero in training!! Heroes are literally so cool and you’re a person not only with a quirk but attending THE U.A. high.

He wants to immediately know your quirk and how it works so he can replicate any scenes and do cosplay stuff, or say he knew a pro hero before they were famous and people made merch of them.

As soon as you two were alone, curtesy of Mammon not wanting to pay his debt back, Levi told you to come with him.

He took you to his room and nervously asked you to show him your quirk, he was super excited and was nervous at the same time and tried not to show either of the emotions.

You happily agreed because you love showing your quirk to friends, family, and fans.

You proceeded to take off your large jacket, and he saw a sword on your belt’s side. He immediately thought it would be powerful because you had a weapon.

You tell him to enjoy and watch the show. You twist your blade and it goes from curly to a long straight and thin blade. He’s sort of in awe at what a cool concept it was for a weapon to hide and yet easily open.

The fun had only begun, you concentrated, closing your eyes, with the quiet surrounding you, you proceed to swing your blade forward, aimed towards one of his less filled up walls, and blast an air strike.

You open it up to see you damaged and broke the wall, and the furniture in the next room over from the amount of air you gathered and blasted. But Levi didn’t care about his broken room, he was gushing at how cool you were.

You run a hand through your hair and give him a smile, telling him that it’s your job. “A hero should always go all out for their fans.”

Levi now wants merchandise of you asap and will be your first fan in the club and will become the president of it because of how epic that was, and if that was just you showing him your quirk just how awesome would you be in an actual fight?

Needless to say Levi clung to you for your entire trip in devildom.

Satan

Satan had read about how humanity has slowly gained quirks, or strong powers. They were all unique, with some common ones, and they had all sorts of uses. Sometimes the human could even look non human or become a different state of matter.

He was a little bit interested in seeing your quirk, he wasn’t going to lie. During the council meeting they were told that you are a UA student, but never mentioned your quirk, so he could only think of what it could be in his head.

When you finally came, he tried to be discreet about watching you from afar to see if you would use your quirk.

You didn’t want to just randomly cause havoc, so you didn’t use your quirk at all for the first few days. If people asked you what it was you’d just reply with “Something flashy, I guess?”

What was that supposed to mean? Even detective Satan couldn’t figure it out considering the vast quantities of quirks there are in the world.

Finally, he approached you after school his curiosity getting the better of him. He asked you to show him your quirk, and he was pretty polite. He told you he was interested in how human bodies work these days after reading so much about quirks.

You obliged, but tell him you’ll have to go to your room to do it since you left your sword there, not wanting to destroy school property.

This led Satan to believe your quirk is sword based, and you can use the weapon to slice through anything. He felt pretty proud with that conclusion.

Boy was he wrong, standing in the aftermath of what you just did. You both went into your room and there, you picked up your sword and straightened it out, aiming at a wall, you slammed it down, bursting the air forward and broke the wall with it.

You were mentally cursing as you casually fixed your sword’s state, and brushed off your shirt, as if there were dust on it. You didn’t mean to break the wall, but it just happened. What on earth did you expect?

Satan was stunned, these walls were pretty sturdy, so he thought. Not only that, but his hypothesis was completely wrong. Your quirk wasn’t the sword, was it?

Satan’s ultimate reaction to it was that he’s curious to know what exactly your quirk is, and how it works.

He questions you all the night about how it affects your body, like do you have to concentrate energy to your fingertips to control what is your center of gravitation? Could you use yourself as a center of gravitation? Would it hurt if you did? Where did you get that sword? Could you-

The questions kept coming at you that the two of you spoke until dinner. No one could find you and Satan in any other rooms, so Lucifer checked your’s. He immediately noted you and Satan are together but WHY is there a broken wall.

Oh you forgot about that.

Not to worry, Satan takes the blame. He says his anger got the best of him and that you were calming him down. You have a friend in Satan.

Lucifer could tell it was you since you had a very long sword in your hands, and that it probably had something to do with your quirk, but let it slide since Satan insisted of taking the blame.

Asmodeous

Asmo had finally convinced you to come to a club with him. In insisted he would take care of you if you couldn’t take care of yourself, bugged you for days.

He really wanted to boost his popularity being with the first quirk user in devildom, while bragging about your achievements, it’s his way of saying he is fond of you.

After going to the club, you and Asmo seperate a bit because he got dragged off by succubi, so you ended staying in the corner.

Of course you can’t do that in a club, someone will always approach you. A tall demon tried to get you to dance with them. No matter how many times you rejected, they kept going.

They were probably thinking they could intimidate you into dancing at least and then try something, but you were not a pushover. Asmo finally spots you and is worried and tries to rush over through the dancing crowd.

After the demon tries to grab your wrist you reached behind your belt and pulled out a small curly sword.

The demon was laughing since he thought you were going to attack him with a small sword. That wouldn’t even leave a minor injury. Instead, you step to the side so he’s not directly in front of you, and slam the sword to the side.

As it straightened, you collected air towards it and slided it up then down in it’s direction. You released the air collected as you slammed and a strong gust of wind exploded.

Even the demon was sent flying, crashing into a now-damaged pillar. Sighing, you twisted your sword into it’s curly state again, and put it away.

Asmo was rushing to you in awe. You just defeated a tall and scary demon by yourself!! He knew you had a strong quirk, but not enough to take down a giant demon.

When he finally made it, he took your hands in his and asked the basic questions, like “What’s your quirk? How did you do that? Can I post a selfie of us on devilgram while you use your quirk right now?” And it progressively got to

“Are you wrists okay? Are they still beautiful? Do you want me to apply lotion?”

The entire club was also in awe and staring, but you couldn’t really tell over how dramatic Asmo was being. It was an everyday occurrence to swing your blade at someone, but maybe the demons don’t have epic fights like you thought.

Needless to say Asmo is impressed and wants to brag about you and your amazing quirk to the world and how you two are closer than best friends.

Beelzebub

“Ah, Your name was Beel, right? Would you minded if I trained with you?”

You were the one to approach him first. You really wanted to keep up your training schedule while in the devildom, and hoped that the gym he went was similar to humans, or at least had a practice space.

He was ecstatic to have a training buddy, so of course you can come. You asked him if the gym had a room with training dummies or something similar, and he said there’s a free practice room with dummies you can break if you want.

You were super excited to use the dummies especially if you can break them because you might have to stop after two or three blasts if you couldn’t break them.

While at the gym you two did regular things at first, benchpress, whatever fit people do. Then you came into the training room.

You were tiny compared to Beel so he didn’t think you could do that much damage. But oh buddy. He was wrong.

You brought out your sword and twisted it straight, and stood at a very far distance. Beel was confused to why, but watched regardless.

As you swung your sword down, you collected air and then released it forward, splitting the air into two different sides for a double blast, a new technique to dispel air you’ve gathered you’ve been working on.

Beel could only see it for a matter of seconds as the wind flew past him in milliseconds, before it reached the training dummies in around five to six seconds total.

He was amazed because the training dummies were broken. The one on the left and right, which you were aiming for.

You didn’t expect them to break easily, so you turn to Beel as if saying what now with your eyes. He’s immediately patting your head and telling you that you’re amazing, and keep going.

Such a tiny person can have so much power because of their training;; such amazement and respect for you.

Afterwards he treats you to a meal and you take become close friends and gym buddies, encouraging each other not to give up on your workouts or training.

Belphegor

Belphie had never once seen your quirk, even if he tried to kill you once. You didn’t have your weapon on you at that time and couldn’t do anything.

He also didn’t attend classes often, being asleep at home. But today was a rare day he attended, and he stuck to you like glue, claiming he needed to spend time with you since his brothers hog you.

It was all going well until a demon you knew approached you. He wanted a rematch for last time and claimed he was stronger now, after two months.

Belphie was confused and you explained that while you were at school here, you’ve been challenging the top demon delinquents to get the title of strongest.

He’s just like “wowww. you really don’t have a sense of danger, do you?” The answer is you don’t. You were fairly confident in your abilities.

He stops leaning and hugging you to lean against the wall as he watches the two of you fight. If anything happens to you, he will kill the demon.

He figures it’s gonna be long and drawn out since you’re just a small human, but was he wrong.

Before the demon could move, it was over in seconds. You swung your blade down and as it expanded, you collected the air around and then sliced it sideways in the demon’s direction, giving a horizontal blast of air that he couldn’t dodge.

You called yourself the champion and pat yourself on the back as Belphie is stunned. You really just defeated a delinquent demon with your quirk in seconds, huh?

Belphie tells you you’re alright for a human and rather than pry into what it is, asks if you can prank Lucifer with it.

He’s pretty nonchalant but knows that you can take care of yourself now, and feels a little better with that knowledge since he can’t be with you 24/7.

You’re both going to trip Lucifer on small bits of air occasionally when he’s super tired just to see him lose it.

#obey me #obey me hc #obey me shall we date #obey me swd

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: [AM of last day, after getting bollocked by Mr. Lucas for all the shenanigans they pulled in his room on his tings, 'cos he probably would've separated them, put them on different jobs or whatever] Janis: This is what we get for trying to help him with his fashion choices Jimmy: ungrateful knobhead, him Jimmy: soz you don't look 🥇 in green, sir Jimmy: get your own fake missus Janis: worked out so well the first time... 💍💔 Jimmy: 💰 on there being loads of Russian virgins in his area who wanna 🗨 Janis: when he's done 🤤💦 on his keyboard, Gracie can scalp them and make a new weave Janis: we all win Janis: personally 🥳 to spend that much time with him, like Jimmy: 👏🏆 Jimmy: me an' all, you I can take or leave, obvs Janis: I can epically dump you in front of his own 👀 Janis: win him back and all, bloody love that Jimmy: then when he rings my dad to relay this bollocking and owt else that takes his fancy they can get a bromance going and go for a 🍻 to slag me off Jimmy: chuffed to bits Jimmy: I'll have loads of time to crack onto them virgins myself Janis: LOVE that for them Janis: less about you being that sort of boy tbh, but we can try to work it into the storyline Jimmy: we can keep it between us, it's alright Janis: keep it between you and the Russian virgins, weirdo Jimmy: there ain't gonna be nowt between me and them Jimmy: no need to 💍💔 like our BFF Janis: not even a hymen Janis: romantic that Janis: put it in 🎶🎨📸🖋 boy Jimmy: no can do Jimmy: only got the one muse Janis: s'a insta caption if I ever heard one 💘 Jimmy: keep it in my back pocket for the next 🌧 day then Janis: yeah Janis: if we still need it then, plenty of time to 🗭 when you're meant to be writing lines instead, like Jimmy: where do you 🗭 you live, girl? It'll probably be 🌧 before we even get back Janis: always look on the ⛅ me Janis: just the positive person I am Jimmy: said before you're my ray of ☀ Janis: if I realized there would be a test, I would've studied, babe Janis: love a 🤓 moment, you Jimmy: piss off do I Jimmy: love nerd flirting with me, you Janis: maybe Janis: only 'cos it 😤 😠 😡 🤬 Mia so much Jimmy: wonder how that lad's feeling, if he can feel owt Janis: if it's anything like itchiness and stinging when he pisses, better get him home sooner rather than later Jimmy: really restored my faith in romance, that Jimmy: might have to try and 🎨📸🖋 any road Janis: not a subtle hint either, by the way Jimmy: what? Janis: never mind Jimmy: go on Janis: just saying not telling you you need to go get your dick swabbed, or whatever Janis: joking, obvs Jimmy: funny Janis: yeah yeah Jimmy: not riddled with owt either in case you were waiting for that punchline an' all Janis: 👍 Janis: weren't, but always good to know these things Jimmy: there you go then Janis: genuinely ain't seen him today though so Janis: welfare check ain't far from the truth Jimmy: She'll have got 💀#2 and the rest to help her hide the body by now Janis: be hell to pay if they've messed up the turf here Janis: not taking the blame for that one, like Janis: got a 😇 rep to protect Jimmy: Oi, do it for the reconciliation with your true love Jimmy: full term ain't gonna be enough when it's that #deepandmeaningful Janis: I can think of plenty of ways to stay in trouble and he can think of even more punishments Janis: just that 😍😍 Jimmy: I get that you're fated, don't need to rub it in Jimmy: here I were reckoning we were the starcrossed ones but its been you and him all along Jimmy: 😭🎻💔 Janis: be such a good plotline if he were actually fit Janis: make the best of it but 🤢🤢 Jimmy: soz mate I can't talk to you for a bit Jimmy: that gutted I am Janis: piss poor excuse but alright Jimmy: how is our 💕 being a sham a piss poor excuse? bit rude Janis: you should be over the 🌙 Janis: what it's meant to be, we're #killingit Jimmy: you're killing me Janis: you 💘 that too Janis: so good to you Jimmy: that'll be why I wanna keep hold of you Jimmy: but alright, you can stop begging I'll fight him Janis: he's spoiling for it, like Janis: thought he might actually bust a blood vessel earlier Jimmy: ⚔️ Jimmy: Bill's 👻 will be dead proud Janis: make two of us #boydonegood Jimmy: you were rooting for him a bit ago Jimmy: #fakefan Janis: keep you on your toes Janis: or him Janis: adds to the mystique, yeah Jimmy: I'm 🥇🥊 and you're well fit and mysterious, save it Janis: 😏🤔 hang on Jimmy: ? Janis: not sure if we're yet at that #goals level of co-dependent where our personalities are interchangeable Jimmy: better hang about for a bit then Janis: gotta go home Janis: 😭🎻💔😭🎻💔 Jimmy: we've got all day that's loads of time Jimmy: chin up ☀ Janis: true Janis: gotta go out with a 💥 Jimmy: Started already with how optimistic I were there Jimmy: we'll do it piss easy Jimmy: no dickhead'll know who's who and who 🗭 what Janis: we LOVE morphing into one person! Jimmy: that's the spirit Jimmy: 👻 girl Janis: vampire boy Jimmy: fuck me, that ain't the one Jimmy: been pissed all over Janis: just can't let being 😎 go, can you Jimmy: you can't let me either, babe, it's #ultimategoals Janis: think of a new, better nickname then, brb Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [some kind of generator moment] Janis: what's grabbing ya? Jimmy: What kind of grab is it meant to be? Janis: something that screams YOU Janis: and #ultimategoals naturally Jimmy: 😏🤔 Janis: UGH, BABE Janis: so picky, omg 🤭 Jimmy: Baby, I'm sorry Jimmy: I just want it to be perfect Janis: YOU'RE perfect Jimmy: You Janis: think they'll let us work together today Jimmy: can't stop us, your ankle ain't healed itself in the night Janis: and what is a top boyfriend if not a glorified crutch Jimmy: when he's as 💪🏆 as me it ain't even a job, just comes that natural Janis: write that on the review Jimmy: Alright Janis: might count as a reference Janis: wouldn't you just LOVE to work here Jimmy: 🚫☕😱😱 Jimmy: #whoamI? Janis: it's like your whole personality is just...gone?? Janis: 😬 Jimmy: that apron is my WHOLE identity Jimmy: can't even 👀 me now 👻💔 Janis: 🤚 💘 ✋ Jimmy: you need to come here I'm FREAKING OUT!! Janis: alright Janis: hold tight Jimmy: can't, I'm just a floating pair of shades Janis: float towards me then Jimmy: [does, soz not soz Mr Lucas] Janis: [being extra checking he's still here] Jimmy: [being extra too like can you feel this] Janis: [😳 to make it clear you do] Jimmy: [taking the deepest breath ever like oh I'm so relieved but really we just gotta calm down whenever we see the bae] Janis: [when you slept together and slept together before being rudely awoken by Mr Lucas so we all need moments] Jimmy: [how dare you sir, but we just holding her like I gotta so I don't float away and disappear so you can't ruin it bye] Janis: [snuggling him like I got you] Jimmy: [brb having emotions me and Jimothy both because he's just thinking this will be over after today hence not letting go] Janis: [we're all gutted and tryna pretend we ain't] Jimmy: [don't cry though boy there's no styling that out] Janis: [I think that some popular kid should invite them to a party that's like, soon as they get back today or whatever so it's like prolonging this day but they still think that'll be it but then they slay that party obvs so then they end up doing all they do in the hols] Jimmy: [I love that and it makes perfect sense] Janis: 😎😎 #confirmed Jimmy: THANK GOD Jimmy: touch and go for a bit there, weren't it? Janis: 🥣 Janis: juuuuuuust right, goldilocks Jimmy: Oi it's daddy 🐻 or nowt Janis: [😂] Janis: not 💀👑 Janis: can't sign off on that Jimmy: [IRL pout] Jimmy: 💔 Janis: what about baby 🐻 Janis: compromise Jimmy: [🖋 in the air like he's signing off on it] Janis: [👍] Jimmy: have we earned a fucking break yet or what? Jimmy: takes the piss, this Janis: 🚬🚬 Janis: reckon so Janis: [getting up even if we gotta lie about a pissbreak or whatever] Jimmy: [likewise because no fucks given at this point or ever like I gotta give her a hand she can't walk if anyone cares] Janis: [big sigh like thank god] Jimmy: [we outta here for however long we can get away with suck it sir] Janis: [take that break lads] Jimmy: [gotta sit down purely so he can put her ankle up on his leg cos gotta elevate that] Janis: ['how's it looking, less fat?'] Jimmy: [little lol but 👀ing at it 'how's it feel, any less of a ball ache?'] Janis: [nods 'like it never happened' not quite but you know] Jimmy: ['I can finally sign off of nursing you back to health then' when you keep thinking about the end of this but emphasis on finally like thank fuck] Janis: ['mission accomplished' like everyone is so 😍 for it and that's the only reason you did] Jimmy: ['post us my award when you get chance, nowt to rush over' with a shrug] Janis: ['got to make it first'] Jimmy: [gives her a look like there we are merging again cos he's an art hoe] Janis: [little 😏 'wait 'til you see it, like'] Jimmy: ['can't' cos so excited clearly] Janis: [shakes her head like oh you Jimmy: [😏] Janis: ['what are you gonna do when you get out then?' taking a drag on that 🚬] Jimmy: ['the question were meant to be what are you in for' and likewise] Janis: [look like, if you feel like answering that, go ahead] Jimmy: [a look in the direction of wherever they saw Mr Lucas last like there's that answer] Janis: [rolls eyes in said direction 'same'] Jimmy: [an exaggerated what can you do? gesture] Janis: [finger gun in her mouth like pow] Jimmy: [😍 and 💔 mime before doing his own finger gun against his head] Janis: [miming waking up miraculously like whoopsie] Jimmy: [playing dead dramatically] Janis: [moving closer to shake him like noooooo] Jimmy: [playing even deader give him an oscar tbh] Janis: [fake slapping him across the face in that dramatic way they do] Jimmy: ['I get it, you're going for the oscar' but said as he still lies in his dead position] Janis: ['nah, just really wanna slap ya' but we're cradling his head in our lap] Jimmy: [looking up at her 'go on then'] Janis: [pushes his face away like no] Jimmy: [gets up like alright, suit yourself] Janis: [awkward silence] Jimmy: [we just 🚬] Janis: [checking the DMs etc] Jimmy: [checking in with Cass and to see if Ian's kicking off yet] Janis: [hold on sir, they back soon] Jimmy: [thank god they're going straight to that party] Janis: [lol soz about it] Jimmy: [lol not soz about it] Janis: [can potentially skip to bus home it's up to you/if you have any ideas for before they leave?] Jimmy: [I feel like we should do a final activity they can slay as a team/duo because haven't been able to since day 1 and that's rude] Janis: [I vibe, potentially should have a flat white on the team too though] Jimmy: [let's have Ella because she'd be devastated] Janis: [so much deadweight on this team, have to actually swag it despite your real injury] Jimmy: [that was my thought, cos maybe another random girl who's also useless for different reasons] Janis: [pop off lads carry team to undeserved victory] Jimmy: [love that for you, happy nerds] Janis: [now go pack your things] Jimmy: 🏆🥇💪💕 Jimmy: well impressive, you Janis: 🤤😍 genuine ✔ Jimmy: Oi, take my genuine compliment, dickhead Janis: let me be genuinely grateful how I wanna be, boy Janis: maybe I got you a prize for being 🏆🥇💪 yourself Jimmy: Soz girl, didn't realise you had Ben in there helping you pack Jimmy: come find me for the #🎁reveal in a bit Jimmy: 🤞 he ain't it Janis: well, rude and ungrateful Janis: poor Ben just wants a fond sexual experience to look back on to avoid the PTSD Jimmy: him and that lad Mia killed, they'll have to couple up Janis: in therapy, maybe Janis: have to wait 'til the bus now Janis: back to the drawing board 😤 Jimmy: I said soz Janis: 😏 Janis: sincere Jimmy: I know Jimmy: right from my 💘 that Janis: as is my gift Jimmy: 👍 Janis: better react more than that Jimmy: make me, Juliet Janis: not giving you a fake handjob under the hoodie Janis: classier than that, ty Jimmy: don't sound goals enough Jimmy: it were you who said go out with a 💥 not a 💦 Janis: exactly Janis: 🤯 Jimmy: be alright, no need to impress me, just the #fans Jimmy: piss easy that Janis: no need maybe Janis: want, obviously Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Janis: so real Jimmy: as real as you want Janis: depends Jimmy: on what? Janis: you seen 💀👑 & #2 leave their room yet? Jimmy: haven't been 👀 Janis: we could say goodbye to their room, like Janis: if they have Jimmy: hang on Janis: 👍 Jimmy: they're in Asia's, should've guessed she can't pack by herself Jimmy: be like getting a hyper kid to do it Janis: can't have her leaving behind her toothbrush Janis: essential in every way Janis: you wanna then? Jimmy: do you wanna? Janis: was my idea Jimmy: so come on Janis: [meet there kids] Jimmy: [what a good idea and a #mood boo] Janis: [when it's not even the place you are first meant to have hooked up, but the actual, so we all know what you're saying there gal] Jimmy: [checking under Mia's pillow to see if those pills are still there in case the bae needs them] Janis: ['toothfairy?' 😏 'probably fit to crumble out soon'] Jimmy: [exaggerated shudder that's not that exaggerated because Mia is that gross and we're tucking the pills back in her pocket for that intimate moment ™] Janis: [just looking down at said pocket] Jimmy: [looking at her like ? cos you think she doesn't want them/is offended] Janis: [shaking her head like never mind] Jimmy: ['what?' cos we're not letting it drop] Janis: [shushing him and hopping on that bed like, what we're here for] Jimmy: [getting on the bed too but still lowkey like are you mad at me thoooooo] Janis: [waiting for him to make the first move, 'cos he's either gonna just do it or 📸 out] Jimmy: [does not get his 📸 out and kisses her anyway] Janis: [live your best life lads, though you should be stopped by one of them coming back 'cos forgot something] Jimmy: [1000000000% agree] Janis: [we know either would make sufficient fuss that everyone knows yet again how #goals and #inlove you're being so mission accomplished but you still mad you been cockblocked we know] Jimmy: [especially because you think that was your last chance cos for real not gonna hook up on the coach however much you wanna] Janis: [mhmmmm] Jimmy: [at least you're allowed to be 😒 as both Mia and Ella would be so annoying about it] Janis: [at least you know that calling Pablo is not goals this time 'round bitch] Jimmy: [spare us and also at least Grace can be sitting on her own again because she's on the shit list after this trip so don't have to deal with any of y'all] Janis: [we all know you cheated sloog] Jimmy: [anyway a girl flirting with Jimothy by inviting him to her party as they are waiting to get on this coach, how rude madam, Janis is right there] Janis: [😒 on this bus] Jimmy: [nudging her cos you know they sitting next to each other] Janis: [just getting your phone out and doing that thing where you raise your head but not your eyes like so non-commital can I help you?] Jimmy: ? Janis: what? Jimmy: What? Janis: you capitalizing at me? Jimmy: I did do Janis: still doesn't make your point any clearer though Jimmy: don't take the piss Janis: [looks up like whatttttt] Jimmy: [whispers 'what's wrong?' in her ear so that they don't get outted for casually having a domestic and also because it's a saucy thing to do] Janis: ['nothing' but taking the trouble to whisper back] Jimmy: [leaning in like he's gonna whisper again but moving her hair out of the way and playing with it as we do obvs and drawing a ? on the skin that he uncovers cos he don't believe you gal] Janis: [acting like that tickled well more than it possibly could to get out of answering, like omg stop it] Jimmy: [actually does tickle her then like tell me] Janis: [loling and kicking like watch out] Jimmy: [just making sure her ankle is okay like steady on] Janis: [🙄 but with that fake affection like this boy] Jimmy: [snuggling into her like yeah I know I'm so extra but it's only because I'm so 😍 but really we are hiding that we're annoyed she won't tell him what's wrong] Janis: [patting his head which is such blatant there there vibes we know] Jimmy: [hidden 😒] Janis: you gonna go then? Jimmy: fancy it? Janis: I weren't invited Jimmy: I just invited you Janis: not your party to be inviting people to Jimmy: you don't wanna come then? Janis: not what I said Jimmy: what you said sounded like some health and safety bollocks though so Jimmy: no need to run the numbers, mate Janis: if I was wanted, she'd have asked herself, sat right here weren't I Jimmy: if I want you, will you stop sitting there with a face on? Janis: not the point, is it Janis: [but looks up like ?] Jimmy: isn't it? Janis: do you want to go? Jimmy: where's your answer? Janis: ♟ Jimmy: [another nudge] Janis: [nudges him back with her bad foot like try me] Jimmy: [looks down at it with a furrowed brow] Jimmy: I get it, you're 💔 you can't dance Jimmy: should've said Janis: fuck off am I Janis: sure you're well 😎 on the dancefloor Jimmy: [😏 even though we know he can't dance she doesn't yet so] Jimmy: Alright, you like to watch #kinkunlocked Janis: 😒 Janis: no, and you can tell your mate that and all Jimmy: I don't reckon Bill's 👻 is that fussed, Jules Jimmy: tends to give the directions, him Janis: 🐻 Jimmy: 👋 Janis: oh no, the bear has eaten your face off Jimmy: @ Mia's dad Jimmy: gonna need compensation Janis: it is your only 💰 maker Jimmy: bit rude Janis: blame the 🐻 for being a bear, alright Jimmy: blame you for bringing him about, more like Janis: it's your dad Janis: baby 🐻 Jimmy: @iantaylor8 Jimmy: he's got competition for being the biggest dickhead of a dad 🎻 Janis: a competition most dads 'round here could go in for Jimmy: 🤞 Mia's wins Janis: what's the prize? Jimmy: golf clubs Jimmy: you can 💀💀💀 'em when you've had enough Janis: fun for all the family Janis: won at life so sure he will again Jimmy: 👍 Janis: don't be 💔 Jimmy: I ain't my 2 dads are Janis: Lucas will take 'em for a pint Jimmy: he got any kids? could enter an' all Janis: dunno Janis: be like older than my mum if they are Janis: 'less he's having loads on the sly Jimmy: all them poor Russian virgins 🤰👶 Jimmy: like a factory Janis: ain't sending 'em no rubles Jimmy: real 💔 that Janis: mhmm Janis: you wanna add to their woes by trying to flirt with them Janis: shameful Jimmy: I don't flirt with no lass, they crack onto me Janis: oh god Jimmy: deny it Jimmy: [shows her all the DMs like see] Janis: that's girls who are ⬇ you Janis: not girls you're interested in Jimmy: not actually interested in any Russian virgins, soz to burst your bubble, dickhead Janis: more fool you Jimmy: fill your own boots, like Jimmy: loads in the area if the ads are owt to go by Janis: 🖕🖕 Janis: need neither your leftovers nor your permission, tah Jimmy: you're alright, I weren't offering neither Janis: fill your own boots, like Janis: case and point Jimmy: calm down Jimmy: you sound like 💀👑 Jimmy: you can have my permission to go to law school if you're gonna keep being a twat Janis: piss off Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: 👋 Janis: [like we ain't sat together Jimmy: give me a bell when you've graduated harvard or wherever Jimmy: might come in handy Janis: sounds about right Jimmy: meaning what? Janis: meaning if I went off and got a law degree, I don't reckon I'd have time to fake date you Jimmy: never said that you'd have to Janis: whatever favour you need then then Jimmy: forget it, I'll use the free time I'll have when you've done one to win over Mia's dad Janis: 💡 Jimmy: 🥇 as per, me Jimmy: no need to go on about it, babe Janis: keep dreaming, new boy Jimmy: [puts his head on her shoulder and closes his eyes like okay then] Janis: [sigh like it's contented] Jimmy: [staying put stubbornly even though he obviously isn't going to sleep lol] Janis: [leaving this for a bit but then] Janis: we probably should Janis: if you're going, I mean Janis: should go together Jimmy: weren't planning to Jimmy: but if you wanna Janis: not hugely but Janis: if we didn't, we'd have to think up something more goals to be doing instead of or they'd fill in the blank of it Janis: this is the easiest option Jimmy: right Jimmy: and she don't want you there, so you should be Janis: bit petty but Jimmy: is it? Jimmy: you said it, you were there when she asked me Janis: yeah Janis: don't care if she wants to suck you off though, do I Jimmy: don't you? Janis: suppose in theory I have to Jimmy: just fake the 😒 face you had on a bit ago, that'll do Janis: I'd rather smack her Janis: but I know how to do it, been here the whole time, like Jimmy: go on, long as you don't fuck up your decent ankle there's no need for me to hold you back or up Janis: not the kind of fake girlfriend I am Jimmy: suit yourself Janis: it'd make you look good, and me like a dick Jimmy: didn't say you had to do it with an audience Janis: don't matter Janis: not gonna tell everyone she tripped, is she Jimmy: Dunno, don't know her Janis: girls aren't like that Janis: a lad has pride and will keep their mouth shut Jimmy: leave it out with her then Jimmy: like you said, what do you care? all just bollocks Janis: like I said, you come out fine, she treated me like a twat, that's why Janis: she don't know I don't care, that's the point Jimmy: Alright, let's make her look a bigger twat Jimmy: how? Janis: Good question Jimmy: 🗭💡🥇 Jimmy: What'd get to a lass like her? 🤔 Janis: if her party was a flop Jimmy: we could do that Janis: can we do that without everyone else knowing it's us doing that though Janis: that's the trick Jimmy: we got caught doing all that bollocks 'cause we wanted to Janis: 'course Jimmy: challenge accepted then Jimmy: but it won't be Janis: naturally she'll be well devastated when you don't shag her Jimmy: She'll live Janis: 😢 but aiming for 😭 so we need the rest Jimmy: every dickhead knows I only want you by now Jimmy: she's taking the piss Janis: yeah Jimmy: you'll live an' all Janis: don't be telling me what to do Janis: 😏 Jimmy: wouldn't be very #goals that Janis: you're telling me Janis: though they'd like it Jimmy: hang on, I'll @ you my instructions Jimmy: they can give it a like Janis: 🤮🤮🤮 Janis: some things work better as a DM, babe Jimmy: [DM's her but it just says hey] Janis: 😂 Janis: don't quit your day job to become a master, like Jimmy: don't need your permission either, Judith Janis: you'll need loads of training Jimmy: piss off will I Janis: 👌👌 Janis: calm down Janis: not given me nothing to go on there Jimmy: [gives her something 🔥🔥 to go on cos challenge accepted] Janis: no need for that Jimmy: you said I hadn't given you nowt Jimmy: there you go Jimmy: 🎁💕 Janis: [a LOOK] Janis: just Janis: rude Jimmy: [a LOOK back cos always] Jimmy: you gonna give me the one you owe me at this party or what? Janis: nah, have it now, hold on Janis: [my idea was something she stole from someone's room that she didn't put in the collective kitty but I can't fully think what yet] Jimmy: [I'll let you off cos I've been there and whatever it is he's gonna be shooketh in a good way so] Janis: [hmm, maybe a screw off Mia's bed, something like that, like no reason to but for the mems] Jimmy: [when you can just kiss her because there's a coach full of people about to use as the excuse we're past needing] Janis: [enjoy that as you fully got cockblocked earlier lads and you aren't over it] Jimmy: [even if some idiot cheers you won't care] Janis: [didn't even when it was fully 'fake' so not caring now you actually wanna] Jimmy: [exactly and likewise what is Mr Lucas gonna do, you're already in detention forever] Janis: [nearly home just leave 'em alone for a hot sec sir] Jimmy: [you'll regret it if you don't sir because they'd be fuming] Janis: [already tieless so watch out] Jimmy: [I doubt they're the only couple on this entire trip so calm down] Janis: [even if most people would have a shade more decorum 'cos not tryna be THE couple, still lol] Jimmy: [at least Pablo didn't come on the trip because he and Mia are the anti couple] Janis: [thank god he's in the year above if we stick to when he was born before] Jimmy: [might as well tbh] Janis: [we know the twins were the biggest mistake of all soz ladies] Jimmy: [not forgiving Caleb for treating Ali like that in her grief] Janis: [yeah that was fucked hence no one can grieve you properly, along with the rest] Jimmy: [anyways he should teach her some more sign language insults because people on this coach are annoying af] Janis: [doing it at this girl] Jimmy: [he'd be so amused] Janis: [so jealous] Jimmy: [she's so brazen like they are the talk of this trip gal what do you think you're doing] Janis: [when you think you that bad, I think not honey] Jimmy: [egg on your face when he brings her to your party and they make sure you're a flop] Janis: [makes your party all about them, like have you been here on this trip or] Jimmy: [love it, it's what you deserve for trying to make Janis look a fool/steal her man] Janis: [tbh] Jimmy: [is there any other coach moments/convos we wanna have?] Janis: [we probably got the jealousy across well, and it's bound to be more of the shameless kissing 'cos you can vibe? so we can probably skip to when they've had to go home for the hottest of secs before this party?] Jimmy: [I'm fine with that cos you know he gotta go sort his siblings out and have a fight with Ian if he's there or steal his stash again if he's not on top of putting on a #lewk for this party] Janis: [exactly, likewise you do have to see your mum for a hot sec and slay on this hoe now obvs] Jimmy: [sends her a ridiculous outfit selfie of something he's absolutely not gonna wear to this party cos he's a nerd] Jimmy: 👍? Janis: so torn between telling you it's perfect and the fact I will have to pretend I'm 😍 to see you Jimmy: you have to pretend you're 😍 to see me any road Janis: yeah Janis: sadly only think it's funny if it makes your life harder though, not mine so Jimmy: back to the drawing board Janis: 😱 the 😎 isn't effortless?! Janis: 💔 Jimmy: not trying to please myself, just you Jimmy: nowt effortless about that Janis: you calling me high-maintenance? Jimmy: if the 😒 fits, Julie Janis: not gonna apologize for having standards, new boy Jimmy: weren't asking you to Janis: wouldn't be wise Janis: that outfit come with a 🤐? Jimmy: [sends her a selfie of him with his hoodie zipped over his head like this one does] Janis: much better Janis: some would say 👍 Jimmy: *🥇 Jimmy: Good job I've got 2 then Janis: s'alright, not gonna keep it for the mems Janis: took 2 🔩s Jimmy: I thought you were gonna say it were alright 'cause you took Helena's meds out the pocket Janis: that goes without saying Janis: who am I Jimmy: exactly why it threw me for a sec, mate Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: What you rolling your eyes at me for? Janis: not a druggie, tah very much Jimmy: never said you necked 'em, did I? Janis: whatever Jimmy: don't get another strop on Janis: don't you start Janis: leave it, alright Janis: meet you outside hers Jimmy: Alright Janis: are all that lot invited too? Jimmy: Dunno Janis: not gonna hope but Jimmy: 🤞 they are or ain't? Janis: had enough of 'em for a lifetime Janis: but 🐓 🦃 🦚 🦜 🦢 🦩 one stone Jimmy: could 📌 it on 'em why the party was shite Janis: not a stretch at all, yeah Janis: my sister's parties are famously shit and they all get wasted after a drink Jimmy: 🤞 they got their golden tickets an' all then Janis: 💀👑 the type to invite herself regardless Jimmy: 💰💰💰 Janis: shameless Janis: got that in common with the hostess anyway Jimmy: she another rich girl? Janis: no idea Jimmy: you know owt about her? Janis: nothing we can use, I don't reckon Janis: barely know who she is, if I'm honest Jimmy: be alright, crap parties are a piece of piss compared to 😎🚬 ones Janis: standard, you mean an' all Jimmy: goes without saying Janis: you been a party here yet? Jimmy: don't need to have to stand by what I said Janis: same wherever you end up, yeah Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: people are predictable Jimmy: weren't hoping any of these knobheads would impress me, don't worry Janis: not a rep to make sure you're having an AMAZING time Jimmy: only with you, that's why it's #goals Janis: naturally Janis: #notlikeothergirls is the branding to go for Jimmy: no ❄ though, that's Mia's dad's Janis: gonna stop pushing now, are you Janis: good to know Jimmy: piss off Janis: no need to be aggy Jimmy: but there's every need for you to have a go, is there? Janis: who said I was having a go Janis: joke, relax new boy Jimmy: 👌 Janis: don't be moody Jimmy: stop doing my head in Janis: fine Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 🖕👋 Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: not okay to use my own move against me Jimmy: go on then, tell me my every move Janis: not 💀👑 Jimmy: could use the same 🥺😢😭😤😠😡🤬🤯 scale still Janis: go on then Janis: where are you Jimmy: 🥺 obvs Janis: if anyone asks, same Jimmy: I am asking, dickhead Janis: we're telling the truth now? Jimmy: Why not? Janis: why are you 🥺 then? Jimmy: you ain't answered where you are Janis: solid 😤 Jimmy: There you go, that'll be why I'm 🥺 Janis: yeah, I'm that easily deterred Janis: what's up Jimmy: What's up with you? Janis: is there a punchline or? Jimmy: 🤡🥊 Janis: 😤 is my 😒 Jimmy: so you're alright? Janis: yeah, I'll survive Janis: your turn Jimmy: What? Janis: to answer Jimmy: I did do Janis: properly Jimmy: you heard me, it's your fault ☀ Janis: it ain't Jimmy: Why do you want me to move across to 😭? Jimmy: bit rude Janis: ugh Janis: be like that Jimmy: UGH yourself babes Janis: just trying to entertain myself on this bus Janis: you're NO help Jimmy: what kind of help are you after? Janis: 🤡🤡🤡 Jimmy: [sends her whatever DM the girl who invited him to this party has sent him since said invite] Janis: cringe Jimmy: You wanna reply to it? Janis: as me or you? Jimmy: whichever one suits you, babe Janis: [writes something from him about really looking forward to the party so she thinks she's in/more sting when it flops] Janis: send that then Jimmy: [does and shows her that it's sent] Janis: 👍👍 Janis: might need to mute her 'til we get there now though Jimmy: are you gonna be my mate again now? Janis: depends Jimmy: ? Janis: what are the perks like? Jimmy: that the kind of mate you are? Janis: just saying, if my deal is better being your fake girlfriend Janis: got to consider these things Jimmy: if you can't handle being both Jimmy: not very 🥇 of you but alright Janis: you just can't get enough of me Jimmy: I get it, you can't 🤹 Jimmy: have to leg it off to the 🎪 on my own 🎻💔 Janis: 🦁 tamer Janis: you're already the 🤡 and I can't grow a beard either so Jimmy: can't be a 🤡 and a 🐻!!!!!!!!! Jimmy: #whoamI? Janis: omg babes Janis: existential crisis o'clock! Jimmy: 😱😱😱😱😱 Janis: drag me for trying to pick between 💘 or 🤗 Janis: you're SUCH a mess, no offense Jimmy: none taken obvs Janis: fine, friendzone me Jimmy: can't win with you today Janis: bit rude Janis: if you wanna do party girl, then just let me dump you Jimmy: if I wanted to I just wouldn't have invited you Janis: no, because that's not the deal Janis: we both agreed already Jimmy: I know what the deal is, tah very much Janis: it's a compliment Janis: i'm saying you ain't a complete 🐍 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: yeah Janis: that's the plan Jimmy: What time do you want me to meet you in the 🦁 den then? Janis: there's a bus stop like five minutes from hers Janis: meet me there at Janis: do we wanna be fashionably late for the 😎 or on time ish to sabotage some more? 🤔 Jimmy: I got nowt else on Janis: alright so [the earlier side of a party starting] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: asked Grace, they are going Janis: made a big Thing™ of getting ready all of 'em without her so Jimmy: charming Janis: yeah well she knows what she did, like 🔪🔪🔪 Jimmy: I get it 🩸🩸🩸 on her own hands not coming out our 💘s Janis: now she's not gonna throw herself at you for Mia's amusement, sorta served her purpose Janis: 'til the next one, obvs Jimmy: I should've made better ☕ my bad, Gracie Janis: 🙄 Janis: obvs Jimmy: what's obvs is that she don't order a latte to support my 🎨 Jimmy: Mia should've known it'd never be a goer Janis: weird, beige is right up her alley Jimmy: her order don't come out purple or owt, don't worry Janis: even I could gather that Jimmy: I can't give you a 🏆 but Janis: could if you put some coffee in it Jimmy: rather put 🥃 in there but alright Janis: when you're off the 🕥 Jimmy: I didn't realise your plan to fuck this party up was that I serve ☕ Jimmy: 🥇💡 Jimmy: get traced right back to 💀👑 Janis: never work Janis: it's your 2nd biggest 😍 pull Jimmy: good job the only 🕥 I'm on is yours then Janis: safe to say the way you froth does not have me doing the same Jimmy: such a way with words, you Jimmy: SO romantic Janis: has been said Jimmy: TOTALLY won't be 💭💕😍 when I am at work tomorrow, tah Janis: you're welcome for the distraction and the third degree burns Jimmy: how #goals Janis: get to get my own back and nurse you SO HARD Jimmy: you're welcome that I'll be a well easier patient than you Janis: what I'm hearing is lazy Jimmy: you sound like a Tory, I'll go if you've got Mia's dad in another 🗨 like Janis: who could compete Janis: I understand 🥉 Jimmy: 👋 Janis: Can't believe he's so ugly Janis: if you're gonna risk incest, like Jimmy: What 'cause she's so fit it's a massive shock? Janis: 🙄 yeah, you worked that out Jimmy: I know it'll be a struggle but don't dump me for her Janis: shut up Janis: if I was gay, I'd have taste Jimmy: at least 🥉 Jimmy: she ain't on the podium Janis: thanks for your professional opinion Janis: I'm not gonna get someone else involved in this charade Jimmy: but I'm lazy? Alright 😏 Janis: gotta break the ⛓ Janis: tah Jimmy: 💔 that your 🏆💪 were just some bollocks rumour Janis: not carrying you around either Janis: 💀 from 💔 Jimmy: I heard you, wanting me to lie down and 💀💀💀 in the dirt, weren't it? Jimmy: ✔💕 Janis: 🥺🙏 Jimmy: I'll let your bus roll over me Jimmy: job done Janis: be waiting a while Jimmy: #kinkunlocked Janis: slowburn? Jimmy: love a bit of a waiting game, me Jimmy: 🏆 best dad ever 🏆 for pissing about with this will we, won't we fuck off out of here Jimmy: if you're gonna risk incest Janis: how sweet of him Jimmy: right Janis: gutted my ma got that all out of her system when I was 👶 Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: mhmm Janis: but alright with not having to have them tag along Jimmy: 🍻 to that Janis: how's your brother Jimmy: did you get an SOS 🦇 girl? Janis: nah Janis: just asking Jimmy: [sends her sign language stuff on how to ask how someone is so she could ask if she wanted to] Janis: alright, alright Janis: 🖕👋 would suffice Jimmy: it were you who said you wanted something to do 🥱🚍 Jimmy: have a go Janis: what if one of these old bags knows it too then I'm stuck in a conversation Jimmy: call me, I'll sort it out Jimmy: but 🖕👋 would probably suffice there an' all Janis: 😱 Janis: shocking behaviour Janis: I would NEVER Jimmy: if you get it right you can ask that lass how's she's doing when her party goes tits up Jimmy: so crack on Janis: 😒 hmm Janis: manipulative but alright Jimmy: are you gonna be mardy about her all night? Janis: obviously not Janis: how would that make me look Jimmy: I meant here 🗨 @ me Janis: I'm not being mardy Jimmy: 😒 you Janis: you all the time Janis: not taking it personally, am I Jimmy: told you before, I ain't a mind reader Janis: I'm not mardy at you Jimmy: Okay Janis: It's her, I told you Jimmy: Yeah Janis: dunno what her problem with me is Jimmy: she don't look as good in green as Mr Lucas, massive problem, that Janis: she can see him after class and take it up with him, like Jimmy: long as he don't stick her in detention with us Janis: then I will be 😒 with you Jimmy: baby 🥺 Janis: wanna be alone with you and Mr Lucas, obvs Jimmy: duh, you'll have gone 3 weeks without him by then Jimmy: near torture Janis: don't remind me 💔 Jimmy: I'll have to send him a 💌 when I go Janis: we're not sharing Jimmy: you're alright, I don't reckon he'll be about having a LDR with me Jimmy: he's very physical Janis: not 🥈 Janis: just 'cos you've pissed off Jimmy: you're 🥈 with me here Janis: fuck right off Jimmy: There she is, my 🦘🥊 Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Janis: 😍😍😍 look better with bruises Jimmy: your blatant kink, that Jimmy: 🔓 Janis: just true Janis: the less you look like you the better, DUH Jimmy: any excuse to wear my 😎 suits me Janis: true 💘 Jimmy: 😘 Janis: did you go for the hoodie then? Jimmy: is it a dealbreaker? Janis: could be Jimmy: I could grab it then Janis: what are you wearing Jimmy: Don't you wanna wait and see? Janis: I'll still be able to fake my 😍 without the surprise Jimmy: [a selfie of whatever lewk he's serving] Janis: yeah Janis: good job 👍 Jimmy: Tah Janis: don't you wanna make sure I look okay? Jimmy: don't need to Janis: I could totally shame you Jimmy: you couldn't Janis: trust 💪🏆 Jimmy: I don't care what you've got on, not a mean lass Janis: just getting it off, gotcha Jimmy: just leave out spending it about, not very #goals of me Janis: couldn't be non-goals if we tried Janis: bar's that low tonight Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt baby Janis: mhmm Jimmy: show me then Janis: [going relatively hard here we can presume because these basics ALWAYS do so you need to do it but better] Jimmy: [I likewise think he's gone harder than he would so I vibe it] Janis: [we out here] Jimmy: [pinterest has cockblocked me as usual] Janis: [I've not looked yet but we know the vibes] Jimmy: Oi Janis: what you oi'ing at? Jimmy: you can't be saying the bar's that low and giving me that Janis: what do you mean Jimmy: I mean you know what you're doing wearing something so 🏆 worthy Janis: yeah, I do know what I'm doing Janis: you can trust in that Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 😏 Janis: you can say I look fuckable, it's the point Jimmy: and you reckoned it were me displaying shocking behaviour a bit ago Jimmy: 🧼👄 Janis: must've been wishful thinking then 😇🤓 Jimmy: I get it, your SO 🥱🚍 you've gotta take the piss now Jimmy: stop thinking about me, girl Janis: guilty Jimmy: 👮🚔 Jimmy: you just wanna be back in chains of any sort, well predictable you Janis: gotta practice having this shit on 🔒 Janis: lads don't even wanna claim 'em after, never mind hold 'em down Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: chuffed to be your lab 🐀 Joan Janis: never poured acid in your 👀s Janis: lucky little 🐀 boy Jimmy: Tah for not doing owt to the 👂 growing out my back an' all Jimmy: know what you're like, lucky it's still attached Janis: gives you character Janis: pick you out of a lineup with your fellow whiteboys Jimmy: #newschoolnewme Janis: wait 'til I make a little maze for you, buzzing, you'll be Jimmy: 🎨🏆🥇 Janis: and 💪 Janis: combination of our 💘s #SUCHgoals Jimmy: we did it, we merged!! 👏👏 Janis: 5 WHOLE 👂S!!!! Jimmy: can't top that, might as well turn that bus around and go home, mate Janis: Okay Keanu Jimmy: no dickhead can deny that outfit could stop traffic Janis: smooth Jimmy: til you 🤮 Janis: not gonna get that wasted, even if I look like 'em Jimmy: Duh pisshead, I meant from the hard braking Jimmy: and you don't look like them Janis: I'm 💪 Jimmy: SUCH an athlete, yeah, I've heard Jimmy: it were bollocks though, don't rub that in again, tah Janis: the 1994 film or my athleticism? Janis: either way, how DARE you Jimmy: Both obvs Jimmy: I'll dry your eyes if you do mine Janis: not hot Janis: 👎 Jimmy: weren't what I were going for Jimmy: you're on one, not me Janis: you're trying to get me to 🤬 Janis: but I've got Helena's 💊s so you can't bring me ⬇ Jimmy: say that again when I'm carrying you down them bus steps Janis: that won't look kidnappy at all Jimmy: is that you trying to put me off? Jimmy: have another go Janis: 👠 are great weapons Jimmy: nowt I don't already know Jimmy: had a girlfriend before Janis: sure she couldn't kick as well as me Janis: whatever you reckon Jimmy: no need, just chucked 'em at me instead Janis: under or over? Jimmy: @ her if you want tips Janis: no tah Janis: not that bitch that stalks all your exes to make sure they're fatter than me Jimmy: only got the one, wouldn't take you long Janis: yeah? Janis: still Janis: sounds delightful and my inbox is full enough Jimmy: mine an' all Jimmy: delighted for us, she is Janis: you probably can't tell her it's fake, yeah Janis: usually wouldn't be an issue with her being miles away but love to break that scandal by the sounds of Janis: 😬 Jimmy: weren't planning to tell her nowt Janis: if it gets her to 😶 Jimmy: less than nowt would do Janis: fairplay Janis: know the sort Jimmy: 💔🎻😭 is her sort Jimmy: why we were such a #goals match Janis: only like magnets Janis: you attract 💔🎻😭 Janis: clearly Jimmy: what I get for being SUCH a 😒🌧 lad Jimmy: just that northern Janis: teach you how to be ☀ obvs Jimmy: reckon you've got enough time, do you? Janis: reckon I'm that good Jimmy: it don't matter what you reckon, bighead Janis: rude Jimmy: you can't give yourself the 🏆 Janis: I'm the only one who's opinion I trust so Janis: seems fake Jimmy: that's me out of a job then and your Tory heart 💔 Janis: well I'm sure it'd be top goals to change my mind Jimmy: I wouldn't put any 💰 on it if I were you Jimmy: unless Mia's dad is paying Janis: probably LOVES gambling on poor kids Jimmy: goes without saying Janis: wonder if any of our other pals are gonna show Jimmy: Depends how selective she were with the invites Jimmy: be quality if she's betting on it just being me and her Janis: oh Christ, don't Jimmy: it's alright, I ain't worried about chucking her out of her own house Janis: that's easy regardless Janis: slightly smaller scale Janis: gotta secure her room asap, also goes without saying Jimmy: but you still said it Janis: it was thick, nor Northern, right? Jimmy: I know what I'm doing an' all Janis: I know Janis: I said you looked good too Jimmy: I heard what you said and I weren't 🎣 Janis: 🤏 Janis: but since you washed my mouth out I can't be any more descriptive than that o Janis: so* Jimmy: if I wanted you to say owt you'd know about it Janis: 👍 Jimmy: how far away are you? Janis: [when ages isn't even a pisstake] Jimmy: [oh that bus journey such good times to come] Janis: weren't exaggerating Jimmy: never said you were Jimmy: I just wanna know where to be Jimmy: ain't far to hers from mine, must be why she likes me Janis: if she knows where you live that's the least of your worries, no? Jimmy: 💀👑 bound to have told everybody by now Jimmy: been stalking me for ages, her Janis: least she's never been in your gaff Janis: far as you know Jimmy: I'd have found strands of hair or 🦷🦷 all about Janis: exactly Janis: clean-up is no joke Jimmy: unless the 🐕 ate 'em Jimmy: find me 💀💀💀 then Janis: not before me she won't Jimmy: I'll try and hang on for you, Jules Janis: least you could do Jimmy: my stamina being what it is, might take a lot Janis: ⬇side of having a 👴 fake boyfriend Jimmy: brb gotta screenshot that to sir so he knows his place Janis: cucked again Jimmy: #kinkfulfilled 💕 he's welcome Janis: your generosity is known, above and beyond, you Jimmy: it's been said before, your originality needs work Janis: you're the one censoring me Jimmy: only so you don't put words in my mouth Jimmy: when I wanna give you a compliment, there's loads on the tip of my 👅 Janis: conveniently you never do so how do I know that? Janis: 🧠📖? Jimmy: You never wanna take 'em more like Janis: Psh Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: 🥺 😢 😭 😤 😠 😡 🤬 🤯 only please and thanks Jimmy: *😭 Jimmy: as per Janis: Baby Jimmy: 🐻 Janis: that's why I'm trying to get you 😠 Jimmy: soon as we get there ✔ Janis: you make a handy pillow, say that Jimmy: and you wonder why I'm censoring you Janis: I'm well serious Janis: how am I meant to take a nap now Jimmy: poor baby Janis: 🥺 now Jimmy: I'll @ Helena see if she's got any uppers an' all Janis: fine Janis: scout the shoulder talent on this bus whilst you're at it Jimmy: not your pimp, remember Janis: delete the creeper shots then, shall I Janis: UGH Jimmy: do what you like, my dear Janis: naturally Jimmy: you've made me tired now, tah for that Janis: how weren't you anyway Jimmy: didn't have chance Janis: being 'round our peers is exhausting Janis: can't wait for this holiday to actually begin Jimmy: it's alright for you, I'll have to be around 'em more when it does Janis: yeah, that's shit Janis: only see the ones that cba to walk their dogs, and the gals, obvs Jimmy: least you won't have to see me walking ours Jimmy: if my sister don't do it, don't get done Janis: yeah, right silver-lining that Janis: 'cos I don't drink the shit you serve either Jimmy: soz I'm not a paid barman Janis: 💔 Jimmy: have to crack on with stealing Ian's 🥃 for a bit longer Jimmy: gutted though I am Janis: works for me Janis: I'll get on it with pulling my weight on that front Janis: know someone nearby, stop there first Jimmy: there won't be nowt left for you if you don't hurry up driving that bus, Sandra Jimmy: be a good shout Janis: Keanu would never Jimmy: @ him to take you to this party, don't bother me Janis: the ONE boy not in my DMs, would you believe 🤷 Jimmy: he'd never make a move either so I can, yeah Janis: what you saying, that I think you > keanu? Jimmy: I'm saying it don't matter how big your head is, he's too sad Jimmy: no ☀ for him Janis: 😭 on your level now Jimmy: soz that's your type, gotta be hard going Janis: he might be an outlier, all you know Jimmy: What's the fuck is that? Janis: like, he's an anomaly, one-of-a-kind-one-off and the rest of my 'type' is 👌 Jimmy: Like you said, for all I know Janis: as you said, not my pimp, so you don't need to know one way or the other Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: still weren't 🎣 you can calm down Jimmy: my rod is well away Janis: you're at home, yeah? Janis: so that is your business and your prerogative Janis: ⏲ not started Jimmy: very generous of you Janis: not 💭 about it or nothing Janis: 😇 Jimmy: you're far too tired, I know Janis: cheek of you Janis: you're the 👴 with NO stamina Jimmy: you're the one that were going on and ON about it Jimmy: giving it all that 🥺🥺🥺 Jimmy: which is a bit rude when there's nowt I can do to help Janis: would I set you up to fail? Janis: sounds fake Janis: you could entertain me Jimmy: Go on, how do you want me to wake you up? Janis: how do you reckon Jimmy: I reckon you should tell me Janis: even though you already know? Jimmy: if you reckon I do then there's no challenge saying it, is there? Janis: depends Jimmy: on what? Janis: if you reckon there's challenge in hearing it Jimmy: You reckon I wouldn't accept it if there were? Janis: Have to think on that Jimmy: til you fall asleep at any rate Janis: stop questioning my stamina! 😏 Jimmy: I ain't done once Jimmy: you said it Janis: I know Jimmy: I ain't trying to trick you into a Q&A or owt Jimmy: no questions Janis: damn, I LOVE talking about myself Jimmy: loads of better games if that's what you're after to stay awake though Janis: go on Jimmy: I dunno which of 'em if any are 🚍 appropriate Jimmy: unless you paddys play by different rules Janis: I'm sure I'm obligated to tell you our rules would only make it more inappropriate Janis: we can play at the party? Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: but we better keep it between me and you, no other dickhead's supposed to be threatened with a good time Janis: 'course Janis: know any 2-player games? Jimmy: I'll 💭 while you think on how I've never backed down from any challenge I heard yet Janis: dangerously close to a promise that you won't ever Jimmy: Why would I? Janis: Promise? Janis: Yeah, fuck knows Jimmy: or ever back down Janis: can't answer that, like Jimmy: you could Jimmy: don't sound like me, for a start Janis: alright Jimmy: say it like you fake mean it, babe Janis: I do mean it, dickhead Jimmy: that's better Janis: you've picked now to be hot about it Jimmy: you wanted entertaining Janis: I did Janis: not complaining Jimmy: aren't you? Jimmy: don't sound like you, that Jimmy: if this is the REAL bus driver, focus on the job at hand, dickhead Janis: he's well distracted tbh Janis: you know when they have their mate on for a chat? Janis: can't do that at any other job Jimmy: could chat to you when I'm serving ☕ if I wanted Janis: alright, smartarse Janis: only if I ordered, or your manager would be up in your face for slacking Jimmy: Yeah, I get it what you're on about, I'm not meant to, would be a decent reason to bother Janis: for you, definitely Jimmy: Oi Janis: what am I getting out of it Janis: beyond your delightful company Jimmy: What do you want? Janis: not a latte 💔 Janis: soz, your 🎨 like Jimmy: you don't need to support it, you inspire it Janis: 💘💘💘 Janis: could be worth coming in when 💀👑 squad is about Janis: not every time but, you know, at least a few Jimmy: lunch time is a good shout, they hang about for ages then Janis: yeah, alright, I'll find a day I can do that then Jimmy: 👍 Janis: not ideal if I have to stand outside with the 🐕s obvs Jimmy: we can make it work Jimmy: there's massive windows they can 👀 us from Janis: goldfish bowl Janis: I know the vibe Janis: even if I'm anti it Jimmy: you won't have to say nowt nice to me, what more do you want? Janis: I'm always nice Jimmy: you won't have to say owt #goals to me then Jimmy: you know what I mean Janis: Yeah, I do Janis: already agreed and all, no need to work any harder, like Jimmy: ain't hard work and even if it were, not the lazy git you keep saying Janis: now you're 🎣 Jimmy: bollocks Jimmy: not letting you slag me off ain't the same as being after a compliment Janis: what I reckon don't matter anyway, apparently Jimmy: only when it comes to 🏆 Jimmy: I give 'em, you get 'em Jimmy: that were all I said Janis: 👍 Jimmy: don't be a dickhead about it Janis: I'm not Janis: focusing on driving Jimmy: I get it 💣 weren't your top 💀💀💀 Janis: always you, babes Jimmy: I'll keep it more personal 💕 I remember that's how you wanted it Janis: how much do you remember, exactly? 🤔 Jimmy: 🔪 'cause it were more personal, that were it Janis: 💣 for one person is just overkill Jimmy: it'd do the whole 🚍 don't worry Janis: boy, you're special Janis: not going 'round 💀💀💀 everyone willy nilly Jimmy: Alright, that were a nice thing to say, I'll give you that Janis: romantic, you said Jimmy: Yeah Janis: you care what you drink or what? Jimmy: or what Janis: ✔ answer Jimmy: weren't a real question, you saw me drink Ms Burke's Janis: can afford to be a bit more selective, is why I asked Janis: but can't get more than a bottle so Jimmy: we'll rinse this lass when we get there Janis: standard Janis: if she were just expecting you, might be champagne Jimmy: who does she think I am? Janis: someone to treat right, OBVS Janis: long as she's done the chocolate covered strawberries too, might go a bit easier on her Jimmy: you can have them, I'll say I'm allergic Janis: you're adorable Jimmy: might be, we don't have 🍓 in the north Janis: leave the 🎻 story at the door though Janis: trying be less likable, remember Jimmy: long as I've got you to keep on reminding me, be alright Janis: ha, funny 🖕 Jimmy: I'm well serious, I need your help Janis: 'cos I'm such a dick, yeah, I know Jimmy: 'cause she is and you've got 🥇💡 Janis: got vodka Janis: safest bet Janis: be at that bus stop in under 10 Jimmy: Already there Janis: 😇 Jimmy: *😎🚬 Janis: 😇🚬 I'll allow Jimmy: *😈🚬 Janis: Prove it Jimmy: Alright Janis: alright Jimmy: in under 10 Jimmy: however you want Janis: however? Jimmy: you heard Janis: [show up and do a dramatic run (careful) off this bus to even more dramatically kiss him, like clearly this party is quite central so MAYBE someone is walking past, who can be sure, but lbr the excuse is only an afterthought if he asks at this point lol] Jimmy: [sitting her at this bus stop because do be careful babe because we're on a 'mission' before we get there and it's to add any lovebites where there aren't in any skin you can see when she's wearing that lewk but of course that's not extra enough so he has to go over her others too starting at her neck and being very thorough obvs but they've had like no time to fade at all so he's just kissing her shamelessly, we all know it] Janis: [such extra but real reactions as if it hasn't been the hottest of secs since you saw each other, grant you you did get interrupted but maybe not your brightest idea to start this in public when you got places to be, love it] Jimmy: [you two are the best] Janis: [we could always have someone from school go by, a lad like wheyyyyy, but letting you have this for now] Jimmy: [give you a minute but not long enough for this to get out of hand] Janis: [we know we're immediately moving to sit on him instead] Jimmy: [I fully support that even if it means it's easier for you two to go too hard in public lol] Janis: [start as you mean to go on lowkey] Jimmy: [we ain't even gonna make it to this club energy again, we know where your daughter gets it from in the future lads] Janis: [mhmm, blame your lack of chill on them girl, it's valid] Jimmy: [none of your kids have any chill romantically and we all know it] Janis: [the trouble they get in 'cos of...damn you and your romcom romance JJ] Jimmy: [it makes me die cos they are the two characters least likely to start in a romcom] Janis: [we did that boo] Jimmy: [anyway get out of this bus stop before you give some old lady a heart attack, gotta dramatically carry her into this party like she's your bride, sucks to suck gal whose it is] Janis: [not invited, turns up like cleopatra lmao] Jimmy: [also drink some of your vodka on the way babe you've gotta catch up to him cos he's been dipping into Ian's stash] Janis: [bleurgh straight vodka but yes, kill those tastebuds] Jimmy: [I literally could not but you two are not me thankfully] Janis: [shoutout to fearghal for giving you a bottle for free 'cos that's the kind of granddad he is, just the one though] Jimmy: [he's a soft touch but not a mug and we stan] Janis: [just discussing the plan here but being saucy snuggly in-between 'we're gonna have to be social, I reckon, to properly make sure it all goes to shit' sad face like ugh] Jimmy: [such a dramatic ugh reaction of his own that isn't even fake cos he's antisocial af but nods because she's right] Janis: ['we'll find time...still need breaks, right' going for his pocket so you can get a 🚬 to pass back and forth 'cos no sense not sharing when you are this close rn] Jimmy: ['how long have you been lying to me then?' cos she was a mind reader there] Janis: ['just so cool, it's known' 🙄😏] Jimmy: [😏] Janis: ['unless you're talking about all the other lies, then-' does a 😬 and puts a finger to his lips like shh] Jimmy: [being saucy with that finger cos you walked into that one gal] Janis: ['don't drop me' as if he's the one being affected rn] Jimmy: [holds her tighter like I won't but also just because] Janis: [giving him such a LOOK 'cos we out here looking good feeling better] Jimmy: [forever giving her a LOOK back because likewise and also that selfie did not do justice to how either of them look IRL] Janis: [lord knows I probably don't have one so fully use your imagination here lol] Jimmy: [we know they are both serving that's all that matters] Janis: [as if you don't show up everyone else without trying] Jimmy: [that's the tea, better have you show up cos it's probably not far] Janis: [just being like omg hi and so friendly 'cos can't know it's you two, even though you literally wanna murder this girl for shading you] Jimmy: [using all your barista charm because if you can do it for the Mia's of the world you can do it for anyone and holding onto her still even when you put her down l like I got you gal cos you're a team and you know she's fuming] Janis: [you really thought he was gonna ditch her the second he got off the bus for you like??? ok miss deluded] Jimmy: [some people really love themselves and think they're the shit] Janis: [tea, @Mia 'cos she's lowkey so average looking no offense to the actress lol] Jimmy: [and lbr you also thought he just wanted to hook up with her and then he'd be onto the next like how rude on so many levels] Janis: [we know that is how most teen boys operate but they were going in for the 💘 ting] Jimmy: [my soft boy would never] Janis: [the cheek, so, what's the first step into making this party shit I wonder] Jimmy: [well if there was hardly any booze/it ran out too soon that'd ruin it but they can't single handedly drink it all so they might have to hide it or something lol] Janis: [that's a good idea, or tip it if we being really shamelessly shady] Jimmy: [hide the stuff you want in a bush or something to grab later and pour the shit you don't down the sink] Janis: [good plan, leave the really basic wine coolers and shit beers] Jimmy: [mhmm, no loss there, and obvs you can drink plenty of the good shit too but no need to give yourselves alcohol poisoning on what you think is your last night together potentially] Janis: [just acting like that's all she's supplied like idk what to tell you lads, and being generous with your bottle that is somehow not going down lol lol] Jimmy: [god bless, I'm trying to think how else they could mess shit up without it being obvious hmmm] Janis: [shit tunes shit tunes, even shit by other people's standards that mysteriously keep getting put on] Jimmy: [gotta be a sneaky 👻 Jimothy, great idea babe, also keep getting turned up so loud the neighbours will be fuming even when the hostess turns them down] Janis: [100%, also easy to trash this gaff sneakily without anyone else having the fun of actually doing it 'cos no one is wasted or vibing] Jimmy: [wonderful throwback mems to when they were trashing Mia's room on the trip pre-hook up so I approve] Janis: [think about that, lads, allowed to get distracted momentarily] Jimmy: [proud of you for not getting distracted sooner tbh, shows how much this gal offended you] Janis: [guess you've not been allowed to dance or be alone 'cos setting the shit awkward mood of this party but still, well done] Jimmy: [I have a glorious mental image of peeps leaving like well this is shit] Janis: [damage you done to your rep just by being a rude hoe, think on] Jimmy: [Mia and Pablo have to rock up though cos a shit party is what you deserve] Janis: [ugh couple of the year alert lmao, Pablo is so rude he'll be over it the minute he arrives] Jimmy: [at least Janis won't have to deal with him long] Janis: [pretending to be nice to him is something we're not doing] Jimmy: [that's too far and we all know it, likewise Grace is ignoring you assuming she's there too boy] Janis: [she could be, we just said the flat whites weren't letting her get ready with them but she coulda still showed] Jimmy: [shown up with some boy that Mia didn't sanction to annoy her most likely haha] Janis: [what a party this has been for all] Jimmy: [Jimothy just like this might be the last fake dating moment we have and this is what we're doing ffs] Janis: [not going out with a bang here] Jimmy: [not even close] Janis: so 🥱 I'm on my phone Janis: ✔ Jimmy: bit rude that I'm your last resort Janis: that is partially your fault Jimmy: What have I done? Janis: made this party so 🥱 Janis: duh Jimmy: that were her Jimmy: nowt to do with me Janis: 😏 right, 'course Jimmy: Gotta be a room you can get some 💤 in, we ain't trashed the place floor to ceiling Janis: wanna go look? Janis: can't bear having 👀s on my siblings any longer Jimmy: [picks her up like come on gal let's go] Janis: ['didn't do her sister's room'] Jimmy: [heading in what he assumes is the right direction, but we know what his sense of direction is like] Janis: [pointing with your hands like indicators loling] Jimmy: [thanks for directing us bae] Janis: [like to think her sister is younger/not as much of a dick, hence we didn't trash her room] Jimmy: [agreed, we've got nothing against you hun, putting her down on this bed] Janis: ['you're sleepy too' we telling not asking okay] Jimmy: [a little lol but we're getting into a sleeping position like okay babe] Janis: [bringing up the bottle between you like a baby clove and taking a drink before offering him some] Jimmy: [taking a drink cos why not] Janis: ['you'll sleep well now' and closing his eyes like there there] Jimmy: [snuggling her like now I shall] Janis: [getting comfy 'Bill is gonna be fuming, like'] Jimmy: ['He's dramatic, there's always something with him'] Janis: ['far as endings go though...' trailing off 'well, no one's dead, are they'] Jimmy: ['not the end yet though, is it?' Thank god his eyes are still closed cos we all know where he's going with that question 'and this lass might do herself in when it is'] Janis: ['just prefer putting it out of it's misery' but that doesn't align with the plan so you can't, shamelessly looking at him in the meantime] Jimmy: [opens his eyes 'I know' because you do get it] Janis: [lowkey jumping when he does, then pushing him away playfully before he can even take the piss] Jimmy: [chucks a cushion at her cos I imagine this girl has loads] Janis: ['oi!' and using it as a weapon] Jimmy: ['Oi yourself' we just playfighting now as per] Janis: ['if you want it to look like you've messed up my hair, do it properly'] Jimmy: [pulls her hair in that meant to be pisstakey but actually really saucy way he has before on the trip] Janis: [when the reaction you have betrays you before you've even replied 'I mean, if that's the best you can do'] Jimmy: [goes harder because of the reaction more than the challenge of what she said but we can pretend that's why] Janis: [biting our lip so hard, probably bright red] Jimmy: [running his thumb over her bottom lip like don't cos you shamelessly wanna hear her even though you can't pretend anyone else would be able to, however shit this party is] Janis: ['you're- you aren't terrible at this, you know'] Jimmy: ['you're alright an' all' but we're saying it with more feeling than the words suggest] Janis: ['then let's do it some more' not clear if you mean like, right now, or let's keep doing this whole thing but you know] Jimmy: [when you just nod cos either way you're like yeah] Janis: [we kissing him] Jimmy: [pulling her into you via a hair pull to keep that going and making out for a while which gives you an idea and telling her you've thought of a 2 person game like she wanted and it's that one where you have to keep kissing without stopping but you're not allowed to touch and the first person who does loses] Janis: [groaning like that will be so hard but nodding 'cos duh challenge accepted] Jimmy: [the real question being who do we want to give in first? haha] Janis: [hmm, she did fall off the assault course last so give it to him this time I reckon] Jimmy: [fair that was very shaming for her, you can survive this a lot easier boy] Janis: [we all know this is not a real loss either way lol] Jimmy: [exactly so you can't pout for long] Janis: [esp when she tells you what she wants for winning] Jimmy: [saucy behaviour is afoot] Janis: [not gonna be rood and cockblock you twice in such a space of time] Jimmy: [yeah we won't be that rude] Janis: [as you have to see this party out to the bitter end, even if that's sooner than usual] Jimmy: [and LORD what fun that will be] Janis: [gonna say Pablo has fucked off so Mia is raging/fake crying somewhere now] Jimmy: [I support that wholeheartedly, would also love if Grace has left with whatever lad she came with because Mia will hate that and also it means she don't have to deal] Janis: [we know everyone is jumping ship here[ Jimmy: [it's gonna be jj and this girl soon lol] Janis: [lordt] Jimmy: [not having a 3way with you hun] Janis: [when you probably pretending it was such a casual everyone was invited mood now 'cos you being ignored lowkey] Jimmy: [that's what you get for being a dick] Janis: 👻👻👻 Jimmy: Tah for your permission to properly ghost her Jimmy: she's 👀 at me still Janis: just don't leave without me Janis: not after that bonding moment Jimmy: I carried you in, gotta carry you out an' all Janis: 👶💀 Jimmy: What kind of insult are you trying to chuck at me there? Janis: from the womb to the tomb is what that sounded like Janis: v poetic Jimmy: we'd have to do loads more bollocks Q&A's before we can make any of these dickheads believe I've known you that long Jimmy: but if you want a poem, piss easy that Janis: not looking to do or make you do that crash course Janis: know you love being artsy though so go ahead with that, like Jimmy: you've pissed on the flashcards summing up my 🎻🎻 life in a line or a drawing Jimmy: 💔 poem coming up Janis: Poor boy Janis: upload the draw my life for more views more appreciation Jimmy: ain't #goals or #dramatic enough before you got involved, girl Jimmy: no need Janis: how rude Jimmy: it's LITERALLY a compliment Janis: half a fake compliment, maybe Jimmy: I'll give you a real one if you know how to fuck with her speakers, no music would be the final ⚰🔨 Janis: easy Janis: just be distracting to 👀 at Jimmy: easier Jimmy: [I like to imagine he's like hey everyone who's still here come and play some random drinking game rn] Janis: [and you will know how to take apart electronics in a way that she won't be able to work out what's happened so have at it] Janis: [if that's in the lounge, going out that window then in the backdoor if they're in the kitchen say like just been smoking what's good] Jimmy: [team effort because he's blatantly pretending this drinking game is so northern he has to explain the rules but really he's just making it up on the spot and then as he goes along] Janis: [just watching like 😏] Jimmy: [just loving life cos he can make people do whatever he wants lowkey, what a fun way to get back at that girl by making her drink something gross and then being like ?? when the music stops #givehimanoscar] Janis: [the power, we're never as thrilled to be at a party than when we're fucking it up] Jimmy: can we go now then or what? Janis: I reckon Janis: 🙌 Jimmy: [picks her up cos he weren't joking about carrying her out] Janis: [toodle-o, hoe] Jimmy: [get those bottles and give them to the bae to hold while you carry her far far away from this shit show] Janis: [do not fall now or you'll both be dead lol] Jimmy: [we should say there are other people from the party at the park cos we said it wasn't far from his house to hers and it'll give them an excuse to be extra] Janis: [ahh teens hanging in parks, a standard] Jimmy: [sit on a swing together lads] Janis: [have some more booze now you can without looking suspish] Jimmy: [yeah you probably haven't had that much cos too busy being sneaky and ruining things] Jimmy: 👍? Janis: better than 🍾 Janis: you? Jimmy: [shows her all the shade that everyone is throwing about this party so she'll be happy] Janis: [loling and scrolling 'good'] Jimmy: [a genuine smile cos she's buzzing and he's glad and genuine 😍 for the laugh] Janis: ['gutted can't stalk Mia's bloke for the reverse revenge pics' just swinging and passing his phone back] Jimmy: ['which one?' because honestly] Janis: [rolls eyes but @ her 'true' adding 'not her dad though, that shit is well easy to find' 'cos a shameless cheat] Jimmy: [taking a big drink and lighting a 🚬 like that's so gross I need both of these things but we just living our best lives tbh] Janis: ['always a party with you, is it' so not a question but realizing how gay that sounds as a statement lol] Jimmy: [blows smoke rings at her sassily like yes it is] Janis: [😏 and taking his bottle, even if you have your own] Jimmy: [allowing it because there are peeps around but allowing it really because he is #whipped] Jimmy: bit rude Janis: bit thirsty Janis: [big swig like see] Jimmy: [😏] Janis: shut up Jimmy: I didn't say owt, it were you Janis: [pushing him but in a playful way 'cos 1. we not mad 2. we don't wanna fall 3. peeps be here] Janis: you knew what I meant Jimmy: [pulls her hair playfully cos throwback to earlier and also pisstake that he thinks she did mean it in a saucy way] Janis: [we are 😳] Janis: oi Jimmy: [looking at her so innocently like ? but boy you know] Janis: [pulling his hair like how do you like it like probably a lot okay then] Jimmy: [we kissing her before any sounds can escape like that will keep it such a mystery, Jimothy I think she still knows you're about it] Janis: [subtly putting her hands up for that mem like, still winning] Jimmy: [little lol because she's funny and we can't be mad] Janis: [return them 😍] Jimmy: [just looking at her because she's so beautiful it's rude] Janis: what? Jimmy: what? Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: ? Janis: ❓ Janis: never mind Jimmy: never mind what? Janis: [exasperated half-lol thing 'stop it'] Jimmy: [writes stop what? on her skin with a fingertip] Janis: [pretends it tickled loads as an excuse to wriggle and generally be distracting] Jimmy: [now we're LOOKING at her and it's a very different #mood] Janis: ['that's what'] Jimmy: [drawing so many ? all over her but really softly so it will actually tickle this time] Janis: [dying like 'alright, alright!'] Jimmy: [holding onto her under the pretence that we don't want her to fall which we don't but also just that bitch™] Janis: ['you're such a dickhead, you know' but softly] Jimmy: ['you're-' so soft it's like did you even say anything sir] Janis: ['well, don't start this again' like we've only just stopped ???ing boy] Jimmy: ['but you're just-' like I can't help it gal cos lbr he can't] Janis: ['you're taking the piss'] Jimmy: [shrugs because probably but again we can't overstate how much he is not trying to and doesn't mean to but also how hard it is to use words] Janis: [fake punches his jaw like oh you, 'cos gonna ignore it either way] Jimmy: [playfully pushes her but very soft] Janis: ['push me on this swing and make yourself useful'] Jimmy: [does obviously] Janis: [living your best life] Jimmy: [so much so we know y'all are gonna stay even when these peeps fuck off cos you don't wanna go home ever anyways] Janis: [definitely, we all know you weren't just here like carrying on the show, duh] Jimmy: [I vote for rain for those Jimmy: mems] Janis: [not out of the question is it, and remember when they got under the jungle gym moment and did drawings, that, ty] Jimmy: [yeah cos it's literally april so and 100% because that was iconic and we need it] Janis: [run babies run but not really 'cos who cares, you aren't going to freeze, even if your lewk is probably skimpy gal, so frolic in the rain for a bit] Jimmy: [we all know it's a #mood and he will keep you warm if needed gal] Janis: [grabbing the stash and taking it under this climbing frame when you finally do take shelter 'cos #priorities] Jimmy: [giving her whatever jacket you have on because that's the kind of fake boyfriend you are] Janis: [searching the pockets like you're looking for 💊s and then miming 💔] Jimmy: [🎻 mime] Janis: ['letdown' but snuggling into the jacket] Jimmy: [starting the doodle sesh by doing the JJ love heart without even really thinking about it] Janis: [writes some shade that that girl or the flat whites would write underneath] Jimmy: [writes the kind of reply he would write if it was a post on socials] Janis: [a realistic looking 💔 with a 🔪 in it] Jimmy: [we just drinking and nodding appreciatively at her 🎨 but then we're drawing Bill's ghost] Janis: [😏 and taking our share as we ponder our 🎨 reply, drawing some 💀s under his feet with flatwhite identifiers, like Grace's weave etc] Jimmy: [draws a 💭 for him and writes 'far as endings go....' like she said earlier and then draws a Janis hanging off the end of the bubble ready to put anyone out of their misery who isn't dead] Janis: [genuine smile, draws a cartoon him peeping over said 💭 with a pen and paper like he's copying Bill's #poetry] Jimmy: [draws a ghost version of himself floating  and crosses out the word endings because still doesn't want any of this to] Janis: [draws an arrow to the book in his cartoon hands and writes 'once upon a time...'] Jimmy: [draws it raining Helena's pills but writes 'letdown' on each pill and puts an umbrella over what she's just written like gotta protect the 🎨 but not over the cartoon JJ or ghost him cos they tough] Janis: [draws a very over-exaggerated Helena 'cos probably not that memorable or noticeable with her mouth open like gimme] Jimmy: [draws a skeleton hand coming up like Mia's gonna snatch them all] Janis: [draws herself jumping down to stamp on said skelly hand] Jimmy: [😏 and then chewing on this pen looking cute doing it obvs but then draws a phone in Mia's hand with a speech bubble coming out like it's her dad talking and threatening to sue etc] Janis: [#distracted af for a hot sec, finally drawing a bored af looking uber booby stickwoman on the other end of the phone like it's a sexline] Jimmy: [we just loling soz to be more distracting gal] Janis: [just adding tears to all the Mia's up here rn] Jimmy: [drawing Mia's dad creepily crawling down the length of this drawing area like he's gotta get to her but there's loads of heartbroken secretaries holding onto his legs and climbing over each other and fighting] Janis: [shudders but also proper lols 'too real' and then sketches out various hunger games ways they can kill each other off to be the winner] Jimmy: [adds his dad peeping like he's gonna snatch the winner and you know it's him because he looks lowkey like Jimothy and he's wearing a t-shirt that says @iantaylor8 on it] Janis: [draws a new Mia 👀 like any dad will do] Jimmy: [does his own shudder and takes a big drink but gives this Mia a crown and a sash that says like world's greatest step mum on it or something like that] Janis: [draws him but like a baby version in various situations with her being the Worst ever, like dropping him on his head etc] Jimmy: [when you start thinking about your mum so you're just having a moment ™] Jimmy: [casually downing so much of this booze suddenly] Janis: [not not noticing but we're not doing anything or saying anything either] Jimmy: [going to 🚬 whether it's stopped raining or not like gotta gooooooo] Janis: [when you're outside so you simply do not boy but pop off, just like wtafffffff over here] Jimmy: [soz gal we gotta moodily sit on this swing and be in our emotions and I'm 100% saying it's still raining so its even more like wtf boy] Janis: are you alright? Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Janis: would you prefer I ask what's wrong? Jimmy: how is that any different? Janis: you can yes or no the first Jimmy: don't be a dickhead Janis: I'm not Jimmy: I'm not doing a Q&A with you at the minute Janis: Alright Jimmy: just leave it out Janis: I said, okay Janis: [getting up like I'll be off then and gathering whatever shit you have] Jimmy: [just looking at her because you don't want her to go but you can't be like DON'T so it's v awkward] Janis: [shaking your head 'cos no more ?s] Jimmy: [passing her your 🚬 that you haven't even lit yet like that'll fix everything] Janis: [looking at it like what even but not going 'cos you can also be a headfuck, we aren't pretending otherwise] Jimmy: [shivering because she has your jacket on so you're just out here in a t-shirt like but not moving because we're very closed off rn] Janis: [chucking it at him and going back to your little den moment like you forget something, but just sitting there on your phone like okay] Jimmy: as endings go Jimmy: I'm not having that one Jimmy: makes me look like a right twat, don't you think? Janis: could do better Janis: probably be the note, yeah Jimmy: ✔ Jimmy: [comes back in and chucks her the jacket back like you'll need this if you're going but we know he just is soz] Janis: you're cold, don't be an idiot Jimmy: you might be an' all, I still don't read minds Janis: wouldn't have given it to you if I were Janis: not that nice, or at all Janis: [throwing it vaguely in his direction] Jimmy: [puts it back on her 'just that stubborn' because he is likewise that stubborn obvs lol but his voice is soft and so are his 👀] Janis: [just looking back at him 'finished having your strop now?' but as a genuine question and as soft 'cos like, no idea what that was] Jimmy: [pulling her hair out of the hood or collar of this jacket whichever it has as softly 'I don't care if I freeze to death' the unspoken implication being that he cares if she does BYE 'but if you don't rate it, we can do something else'] Janis: [just being the most still whilst this is happening, biting your lip 'cos softness, what 'go on'] Jimmy: ['I could tell you about how I didn't mean to be such a dickhead there or I could show you, it's up to you, that' the eye contact be like] Janis: [shrugs like you're so unphased either way but not breaking that eye contact 'you aren't much of a talker'] Jimmy: [kissing her on every lovebite like he did at the bus stop but a lot more indecently than you can do when you're in public, taking his time, playing particular attention to anywhere saucy af because why not eventually go down on a girl for the first time in a playground at night in the rain when you're trying to say sorry and give her something to remember you by #peakromance] Janis: [just saying his name like you literally never have, then after, saying 'I've never done that before' 'cos that #shook but he could take that to mean a number of things so you're fine lol] Jimmy: ['me either' with a shrug like it's really casual because true, you can have that first time gal] Janis: ['in a park, like' and pushing a swing like you've only just remembered where you are, low-key looking around like those people are definitely gone] Jimmy: [sits on said swing like push me then] Janis: [does, 'cos his turn] Jimmy: [looks over his shoulder at her ankle like don't hurt yourself] Janis: [rolls her eyes like, weren't worried about that five seconds ago boy] Jimmy: [rolls his own back at her but with 😏] Janis: [pushing him extra high 'jump off and you can join me'] Jimmy: [does jump off because challenge accepted but thankfully doesn't hurt himself because don't need to be #matching] Janis: [fussing after him like he has] Jimmy: [just having a drink like he's so tough and not at all a soft boy] Janis: [looking through your phone then grinning at something on socials 'I've got a surprise for you'] Jimmy: [just looking at her like ?] Janis: [showing him a snap from the girl to her story about her parents coming home and freaking out 'cos trashed 'text 'em, when I was doing the music' more of a surprise for you gal 'cos you're buzzing but sure] Jimmy: [SUCH a genuinely happy grin, we're falling in love again over here, cos the bae is so impressive] Janis: ['literally no chance of her hitting you up for a solo party now, even if she had no shame, like' grinning back 'cos he's so cute] Jimmy: ['as fake girlfriend's go, you were a top first pick' because as close as we can get rn to saying you like her 'tah for that'] Janis: ['who was your second?'] Jimmy: [shakes his head because he didn't have one and first place or nowt is forever the motto] Janis: [😏] Jimmy: [nudges her 'alright bighead, shut up' even though she didn't say anything] Janis: 'seen not heard?' raises a brow 'very retro'] Jimmy: ['I'm not my dad' shrugs as if that's not vitally important to him] Janis: ['mores the pity, I'm sure' and going to climb the climbing frame now] Jimmy: [follows her in case she needs a hand/falls off cos it's wet and he knows it'll annoy her and that's the excuse we're sticking with] Janis: ['not closing my eyes this time, you're alright' inspecting other people's graffiti efforts with disdain] Jimmy: [chucks her the pen] Janis: [correcting spelling and crossing out the slander you don't fuck with and writing more that you do like that's better 'Lucas would be so proud'] Jimmy: [takes a picture to send to him 'what were his @ again?'] Janis: [genuine 🤔 'something about virgin schoolgirls, can't quite remember'] Jimmy: [exaggerated sigh like ugh fuck's sake 'there's loads of them' but then shrugs 'you'll have to show him'] Janis: ['got a date for 3 weeks time, ain't we' shrugs back] Jimmy: ['you have' cos we're not expecting to be here] Janis: ['he wishes it were solo'] Jimmy: ['you can keep Bill's ghost for a chaperone'] Janis: ['well helpful, him' shakes her head 'end up a ghost before the first session is out myself'] Jimmy: ['what's the matter with that?'] Janis: [little laugh, 'no offense, ghost boy'] Jimmy: ['I get it, reckon undead is better than dead dead, do you?' like that's the kind of snobby vampire she is] Janis: ['don't you?' and LOOKS pointedly at all the lovebites she's done] Jimmy: [looks at her like you have your moments but then LOOKS at her and where they were in their little den like so do I] Janis: [nudges him 'shut up'] Jimmy: [🤐 mime] Janis: [looks down at the den 'don't be hasty...' and mimes unzipping his lips but climbing down like you got somewhere to be] Jimmy: [follows her being deliberately quiet about it lol] Janis: [turns 'round like 'scuse me but when we put out our hand to stop him, we leave it resting on his chest 'where you going now?'] Jimmy: [just looking at her hand and back up at her and then at her lips but we all know he isn't reading them] Janis: [moving a bit closer, putting our other arm 'round his shoulders, 'it was annoying, having to ignore you and talk to other people-' moving closer still, 'til your face is right up in his '-when I'd rather be not talking with you'] Jimmy: [doing that thing he always does where he pulls her closer somehow whenever you think they're as close as they can get] Janis: [whispering even though there's no need bar proximity rn 'I've stayed here before, it's alright, like' saying it like not a suggestion but not not a suggestion too] Jimmy: [when you can't stop yourself from looking in the direction of your house because it's literally over the road even though it's the last place you ever wanna be and then looking back at her as if you'd never looked away and nodding] Janis: [shrugs like it's really casual 'no bus back my way now anyway, so I weren't going home'] Jimmy: [takes her hand and leads her back to their little den and around it like he's doing a house tour because he's a nerd] Janis: ['snug, but well decorated' and smiles '3 out of 5 stars'] Jimmy: [draws those 3 out of 5 stars and writes her review out underneath with her name deliberately wrong and ❌ out loads of times] Janis: [writes her @ and rolls her eyes like honestly 'kill you to give me some promo?'] Jimmy: [📷 mime like he's doing a photoshoot] Janis: [🖕 at him 'cos classy] Jimmy: [takes a real photo of her because amused] Janis: ['oi' 'cos it is dark and we all know flash is a one, as if you won't still look good] Jimmy: [posts it because she does look great and tags that girl in it because he's rude] Janis: ['took a lot more photos when it last rained' we all remembering here] Jimmy: [looks at his imaginary watch and up at the sky like we've got loads of time] Janis: ['shows no sign of stopping' as if you're the kind of person who makes small talk about the weather] Jimmy: [breaks his silence to tell her to 'come here' because such a him thing to do] Janis: [crawling over so she's resting between his legs 'yeah?'] Jimmy: [takes some more pics of her like the art hoe he is so we can all pretend the lip bite is purely in concentration] Janis: ['can't say you aren't dedicated' purposefully doing the most] Jimmy: ['or that you're not inspiring' we can all imagine how his voice sounds] Janis: ['just my job' when likewise the tone is saying everything but] Jimmy: ['someone's gotta do it' but looking at her cos we all know he's glad it's her] Janis: [puts ☝️ up like, you said, first choice] Jimmy: ['you were' because it's true and obvious anyway by this point] Janis: ['let me show you why'] Jimmy: [casually stop breathing because she's the hottest person ever and makes you die] Janis: [return that favour gal] Jimmy: [say 'fuck' for that throwback] Janis: ['never done that, either'] Jimmy: ['I'll knock you a trophy up if you give me a bit of time' when you're not even taking the piss it was just that 🔥] Janis: [cuddles into him like, I can wait] Jimmy: [holding onto her really tightly because you don't wanna let go ever but you still think you've gotta] Janis: ['you cold?' 'cos you do have a hoodie between you 'so, again, somehow getting closer] Jimmy: [we taking the shameless excuse to snuggle and running with it] Janis: [can probably leave this night here?] Jimmy: [we've covered a lot of ground and it'll probably be long cos has the last bit of the school trip on it too so yeah] Janis: [can fall asleep here for a bit, no need for any further drama] Jimmy: [until he wakes up and she's already gone anyway lol lol lol] Janis: [that's the next convo baby]

[janiedean]

i don't get why Jon is considered a threat to Dany's throne when they could just get married? obvs they like each other, and they have targ blood to excuse the close relation

... it’s not that he’s considered, it’s that he is just by existing and that is set up to be the main conflict in the ‘good guys’ side - how it’s resolved is another issue, but like... it’s not that they like each other or not, it’s a question of plot elements and setting.

meaning (guys I wanna be objective here, don’t take this as me hating on d/any or anything because I’m not this is just how I feel they shaped up the narrative):

all of dany’s storyline relies heavily on a few key elements both in book and show, as in: a) she’s the last surviving targaryen and no other, b) she feels that the iron throne is her birth legacy as the rebellion wasn’t legitimate/the targs were the legitimate rulers, c) her entire claim on the iron throne relies on recognizing the targs as legit rulers and on the fact that *she* is the last targaryen left;

and as she put it herself in S7, she has bled and suffered for it - now, dany’s character development in S7 (development) was realizing that she actually cared about fighting the white walkers and helping her allies more than her throne for now at least, which is why jon kneeled when she didn’t ask for it (and I’d like to put forward that I actually get that and I don’t think he did something abysmally stupid from his POV) and that was when they tried to sell us the romance angle (which imvho is very badly written and had endless pacing issues but never mind, I’m not going to question jon/erys’s status - it happened, I’m accepting it);

now, as goddamned fucking stupid was the whole ‘JON’S REAL TARG NAME IS AEGON’ writing decision - because that was fucking stupid, even if the show cut off the aegon+joncon storyline aegon still existed within canon, he’s just dead, so rhaegar naming both his male heirs with the same name is dumb as fuck and makes no sense but never mind that -, it should give you red flags that they mean for jon to take on some of the original aegon vi’s storyline in the book because ofc they couldn’t have two possible targaryens alive but nvm;

now: aegon vi book-wise is a legitimate threat to dany’s claim unless he marries her, since he’s rhaegar’s trueborn male heir which immediately makes his claim better than dany’s and when he realized he didn’t want to wait around for her he went to take westeros for himself or tried to - and okay, dany’s about unaware of that rn because she has more pressing concerns, but the existence of a male targaryen heir who is legitimate automatically puts a dent in *her* claim to the throne;

now, do I have to believe that they renamed jon aegon for nothing and gone through the pains of making us know for sure that rhaegar married lyanna and that he’s *trueborn* (ngl I think it’s also book canon except that I don’t think rhaegar disinherited elia’s children, he prob. just married lyanna without divorcing elia) for it to end up in nothing especially when they already set it up in s5 with that speech to theon about being both stark and greyjoy which was obviously foreshadowing for his future conflict about being both stark and targaryen?

I don’t think so.

now, what I want to get at with my theorizing is (VAGUE SPOILERS THAT I KNOW OF ARE MENTIONED BUT IT’S VAGUE AND I DIDN’T VERIFY):

this season they have six episodes - long ones, but still six. given that the last one is gonna be mostly epic battle/finale stuff and from the five spoilers I know there’s another one towards the middle. This means there’s roughly four episodes of Other Stuff Left and honestly, there has to be a conflict somewhere or the narrative doesn’t go on;

last season tied up the house stark stuff in the sense that as badly written as it was, LF is out of the way, sansa/arya/bran are on the same side again (regardless of how shitty bran’s written but nvm) and pretty much signed off cersei’s political suicide because she has tied her survival to euron bringing her the golden company but theon is obviously offing euron to get back his sister and taking that from her and that’s gonna happen early on, so like.... she’s basically dragging dead narrative weight while going around king’s landing and I seriously doubt she’s surviving midseason, and on top of that there’s no conflict to be had in KL with the fact that she’s the only valuable main player still there, everyone else has left;

we of course have the question of WHAT WILL JAIME DO but that spoiler pic pretty much solved it - he’s going around wearing robb’s old armor or an armor that looks like robb’s, everything points to a confrontation with bran + resolution of issues that brings to him pledging with the starks - the starks, not dany;

at that point there’s literally no other major - major - conflict left to explore that doesn’t touch the question of Who Is Getting That Throne And How It Fits With The Current Situation;

now: taking for granted that jon/erys like each other and they’re most likely in honeymoon phase when they get to WF, the point is that a) they don’t know they’re related, b) he thinks she’s a trueborn queen and he’s only there because people elected him and she thinks he’s an illegitimate son with good skills and good morals. now, while she probably wouldn’t give two fucks about bedding a relative if she thought she’d marry viserys growing up and IT’S TARGARYENS, he might find it a tad more objectionable since he was not brought up with the idea that marrying your relatives was acceptable outside of targaryens (guys incest is a taboo in westeros too) and telling him he’s r’s son won’t magically change his attitude in that sense, so that is one conflict in itself...

guys: jon’s mere existence is a threat to dany’s claim. even if he doesn’t do anything about it and he assures her he can’t care less, he’s still her brother’s trueborn legitimate MALE offspring who not only has targ blood on one side, but has *stark* blood on the other side, and given that the north has tried to secede for the entire series and that he has both stark and targ heritage (guys...... again, a song of ice and fire = a song of jon snow), even if he doesn’t care, other people could see him as a better option than daenerys because he’s from westeros, he knows the customs, he has good military experience that doesn’t rely on dragons to win battles and they’d trust him way more than an outsider who has never been to westeros and comes back reclaiming it because it’s her birthright and who doesn’t abide by westerosi customs - and mind that the tarlys being burned alive when they could have gone to the wall was exactly to make that point. like, it’s the same issue catelyn had with him - regardless of whether he would have wanted to usurp his siblings (we know he wouldn’t have, she didn’t), ned having a supposed *male* son who looked like him and was robb’s age while all her male children looked like her and not like ned was in itself a threat to her children and their inheritance, which is 60% of the reasons why cat hated jon (the other 40% being that she thought ned betrayed her not even a year after they married);

like, that’s an issue that would only get solved if they marry and have children and she chooses to trust him to not make a coup, but even with that... a jon/erys marriage as things are now (with jon being kitn and ned’s bastard son as far as people know) would make her the most important part of it and he’d be more of a consort than king, but with jon being rhaegar’s, either he has the title or they share it equally;

now: dany has to have character development. everyone has to or shit doesn’t happen. jon’s main issue is gonna be reconciling stark and targ heritage (and tbqh I don’t see jon embracing the targ part so readily - guys he’s wanted to be a stark all his life and he grew up with them, let’s be real). dany is obviously going to revolve around the following points at least imvho:a) how is she going to react finding out that she’s not the last targaryen left?b) how is she going to react finding out that the other targaryen around has a better claim than her/has her same birthright?c) can she get used to westeros’s culture/customs and learn them if she has to be queen?d) can she bend her own principles and compromise enough to realize that she can’t rule just through dragons because you might *conquer* with them but you can’t *rule* with them as we’ve seen with the tarlys?now, all of that is obv. up in the air and I have no issues whether it goes left or right - honestly it’s so far in my scale of ‘stuff I care for in this show’ that as long as I see jaime in robb’s armor all the time I’ll be fine, but...

tldr: if the answer to those questions is, in order, ‘she’ll take it well, she’ll vouch for sharing power and it won’t impact on their relationship, yes and yes’ then congrats, we have positive character development and most likely canon targ restoration with jon/erys as endgame. if the answer is ‘she’ll take it badly, she’ll see jon as a potential threat regardless and demand that he renounce it or smth, no and no’, then congratulations, we have negative character development and the conflict turns from dany + starks allied against the white walkers and cersei to a dynasty conflict during which people will have to take sides and in that context tyrion would be caught in the middle because he’s dany’s advisor but on the other side there’s people he genuinely likes/he’s friendly with, the whole question of his marriage to sansa and his damned brother, so he’d have to pick sides in that sense; 

now, it could also be that the answer is no but then she changes her mind and we still have positive character development after the negative - possibly, she’s a main so she’ll get screentime same as jon - but like, that is imo the most obvious and glaring plot conflict that has to come out of what they wrote until now regardless of whether it’s good or bad writing. and fine, it’s been bad lately, but nvm that, the outcome has to be one regardless of how they get there.

like: I don’t doubt that there can be a positive resolution, but there has to be conflict or nothing happens this season if the jon parentage reveal ends in ‘ah well we can just get married in episode two’, and given dany’s in-text character faults that she has same as everyone else (more or less, given how the show’s written), this one plot point is going to have weight and it’s going to create conflict for her because it basically dismantles the entirety of her claim on the throne that she’s brought on since the end of S1 and it’s too narratively important to dismiss it on account of ‘they like each other and they can just get married’. they can, but at the end, not at the beginning, and she has to fully confront it and come out stronger for it if you want a positive development and not further stagnation.

thanks for coming to my speculation ted talk *shrug* XD

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[joannalannister]

Hi there! I've been meaning to ask this for awhile now, but I was just wondering what you think Jon's reaction to finding out Daenerys is his aunt will be? I mean, in my mind, it *could* go either way ... he could just not care bc of the whole Targaryens wedding family all the time, but I'm not entirely sure. I've been waiting SO LONG for my ship to sail, and tbh, I really don't care that they're nephew/aunt, but yeah. I just wanted to get your take on it!

In the books, I think that Jon is going to find out about Rhaegar and Lyanna in TWOW, before he meets Daenerys. So I don’t think “Daenerys is my aunt” is the familial relationship he’s immediately going to focus on, although I’m sure he’ll figure that out eventually. I think Jon has to grapple with the fact that Ned isn’t his biological father, along with the fact that his biological father Rhaegar disappeared with his mother Lyanna, who was underage at the time of her disappearance. And then this disappearance ignited a chain of events that caused Jon’s Uncle Brandon’s and his grandfather Rickard’s deaths. Not to mention a war. 

Quotin myself:

idk if I would be so quick to dismiss Jon’s feelings. I think the emotional impact is kind of the whole point of the story. GRRM says he’s writing about “the human heart in conflict with itself”. It’s the emotional struggle that we relate to, more so than wielding a magical sword and slaying ice zombies. It’s R+L=J that is going to play a significant part in Jon Refusing the Hero’s Call. Jon has created a fantasy about Ned and his mother, and the pain of having that fantasy ripped away, of finding out he was Rhaegar’s design, a piece of Rhaegar’s prophecy, is gonna be a really big deal to him. Jon has to work through these feelings, and decide to save the world because he chooses to, and not because it’s something on Rhaegar’s survivalist checklist. Rhaegar was doing things because he thought it was required (”it seems i must be a warrior”), because some dusty prophecy said so. Jon’ll do it because it’s right and it’s what he chooses, and his emotional journey is gonna be the whole point of twow/ados.

See also. Also also: #r plus l equals j

So that’s. A lot of stuff for Jon to work through in TWOW.

And I don’t actually think that Dany is arriving in Westeros until near the end of TWOW, and I think that she’s going to be in the King’s Landing / Dragonstone area. 

Perhaps Jon will meet her there idk, perhaps not. I personally like the idea of Jon going south trying to find the Tower of Joy and spending 40 days and 40 nights wandering the Dornish desert (I would like to learn more about Dorne), but instead GRRM will probably opt for a metaphorical desert of the heart. Regardless of whether it’s a physical desert or a metaphorical one tho, I think the problem remains the same: the rejection of evil. Instead of Satan appearing to Jesus Jon, it’s indifference and despair that Jon must reject. 

To quote Elie Wiesel, 

The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it’s indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it’s indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it’s indifference. Because of indifference, one dies before one actually dies.

Indifference, to me, is the epitome of evil.

What hurts the victim most is not the cruelty of the oppressor but the silence of the bystander.

This is what I think ASOIAF is all about - having the courage to speak out and oppose what is wrong in the world. (This is why that theory about Tyrion losing his tongue is so heinous.) We see people speaking out when Tyrion stands up for one little girl, in Jon saving wildlings and letting them through the Wall in spite of the bigotry that will get him killed, in Dany freeing slaves, in Sansa speaking on Dontos’s behalf, and the stuff all the other heroes do. 

And we see a lot of evil happen in ASOIAF when people stand by and look the other way and do nothing - like the Kingsguard. 

(Remember Rhaella. Remember the men of the kingsguard who looked away. Remember Daenerys, who “dare not look away” when people are being raped or mutilated or murdered.)

“All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.”

Remember the call: “ARE THERE NO TRUE KNIGHTS AMONG YOU?”

“Only silence answered.”

That’s really what I think Jon is going to be dealing with in TWOW - the temptation to sit it out and do nothing as the War of the Five Kings resumes and the Wall falls, and the ice zombies invade. 

The temptation to answer all this with silence. 

(Like, if you asked me to describe how I think TWOW’s going to be like … I think it’s going to be like that moment in a movie when you’re holding your breath in anticipation and horror.)

I have a tendency to resort to Wheel of Time quotes when I run out of ASOIAF quotes, but I honestly think of these two series as sisters in the epic fantasy genre so anyways. In WOT there’s this prophecy related to the salvation of the world, “The grave is no bar to my call.” 

When ADOS asks, “ARE THERE NO TRUE KNIGHTS AMONG YOU?” Zombie!Jon has to choose to answer the call, despite his death, despite everything that happened to him. 

So anyways … The temptation to answer all this with silence … while I think Dany’s story is going to parallel Jon’s throughout TWOW, I think the very earliest they’re going to meet is at the very end of TWOW, and maybe not until ADOS. 

So by the time Jon actually meets Dany, I think he knows full well who she is, and who he is.

Sidenote - I do not think that Rhaegar and Lyanna got married in the books because 

I believe Jon’s story is about coming to terms with who he is, and that includes being a bastard - just not Ned’s bastard. 

I do not think GRRM would undermine and sideline Dany’s claim to the Iron Throne like that, when Dany’s story centers around a choice between her people vs her throne. It would make her final sacrifice at the end that much bigger, if it includes the throne that she must give up.

So when Jon and Dany finally meet … I think it’s all going to be very chaotic and desperate. 

Also. Jon will be an undead fire zombie in the books, so let’s. 

Let’s not forget that. 

Because I think that is going to be Very Important. 

I would say that death … or zombification … or whatever word you would like to use for the experience of being murdered and resurrected … is going to be a much bigger issue for Jon and Dany’s relationship than simple incest.

I think throughout GRRM’s body of work – not just ASOIAF, but everything – there’s this theme about … about … the boundaries of love, but more importantly, the breakdown of those boundaries that stop us from loving each other. It’s A Song for Lya. It’s the spider loving a human woman in Tower of Ashes. It’s Vincent in Beauty and the Beast. 

It’s GRRM saying that love is boundless. 

So with Jon and Dany … I’m hesitant to speak here because GRRM has so much left to write … I think that Jon has to realize, with Dany’s help, that death doesn’t stop you from loving. 

Think about what Jon’s been through. 

He was murdered. Betrayed by his own men. 

Murdered because he wouldn’t leave the wildlings to die on the other side of the Wall. Because he let them in, in his love and his compassion for humanity. Murdered because he loved a wildling girl. Murdered because he loved his sister, and he wanted to go save the girl he thought was Arya. 

Like, you can get into all the political reasons behind Jon’s assassination, but in the end? I think it was about love. Bigots like Bowen Marsh lack that kind of love. 

And Jon died for it. 

I think Bran’s AGOT vision is a metaphor for Jon in TWOW: “Jon sleeping alone in a cold bed, his skin growing pale and hard as the memory of all warmth fled from him.”

Warmth is love. 

Remember, “The real enemy is the cold.” The cold is slavery, abuse, murder, cruelty. The cold is all the ways that people hurt each other. The cold is indifference, despair. The cold is the absence of hope. The cold is death, dehumanization. 

So in TWOW, I think Jon’s going to have a lot of problems letting people in. 

I think Undead Jon rejects love. I don’t think he’ll remember what it is, and that’s what will make him initially reject his savior role. That’s why he’ll initially be indifferent to humanity’s fate. Zombie!Jon just can’t find it in him to care anymore imo. 

You can’t step up and save humanity if you don’t love humanity. 

I think Dany has to warm Jon up, so to speak. 

Because humanity is fire (life) and the Others and their army of the Undead are ice, and the song of ice and fire is the war between humanity and the Others. With Jon zombified and, worse, indifferent … refusing the call … he’s an (unwitting) agent of the Others, and Dany has to save him. I mean, Dany has to save everyone, but she has to save Jon first. She has to make him remember what it means to be human.** 

Like, Mel is going to bring Jon back pretty quickly imo, but … what is life worth, “when all the rest is gone?” Being back isn’t enough. Dany’s going to make Jon live again, as she never could for Drogo. (That’s gonna be a nice bookend, @GRRM, if we ever get to read it.) 

Like, ASOIAF is about second chances. Samwell failed to release the ravens on time in ACOK, but you can bet he’s gonna release them on time when it really counts. Dany couldn’t make her Sun and Stars live again in his undead state … but you can bet your ass she’s gonna make Jon Snow live again.

I don’t know exactly how that’s going to happen, but I really, really, really don’t think Jon and Dany bang until they’re beyond the curtain of light, in the Other World Faerie Realm Lovecraftian Parallel Universe of Nightmare and Death. 

If Westeros has a version of Adam and Eve, two people alone and in love at the birth of the world … well, I imagine Jon and Dany as the inverse, two people alone “at the end of all things”. 

Imagine Belle’s magic mirror, Galadriel’s basin of water, Saruman’s palantir … the Sony JumboTron … whatever far-seeing device the Others can use to demoralize Our Heroes … imagine Jon and Dany watching all the dead and dying as Winterfell’s outer curtainwall falls. Imagine them watching when … I don’t know … someone in a critical defensive position betrays them. Imagine Grey Worm dying. Imagine idk horrible things. Disheartening things. Imagine Our Heroes losing heart. (The human heart in conflict with itself!) 

(I think the Others are smart and I think they understand psychological warfare. Look how they play with people.)

Jon: “I am glad you are here with me, Dany. Here at the end of all things.”

Not a happy conversation, maybe, but a human one. Both of us needed someone, and we reached out. […I] made love to her as fiercely as I could. Then, the darkness softened, we held each other and [pushed] away the night.

–Dreamsongs

Did it matter to Adam, that Eve was born of his rib? That’s why this issue with incest is so irrelevant to me when it comes to Jon and Dany - I think the circumstances are going to be so weird, so wild, they’ll make that fish-fucking movie look normal. 

Jon is a zombie. They’re going to be in a Lovecraftian Universe. It’s the end of the world. Dany and Jon being related is not going to matter. 

In this Other World, this alien Lovecraftian dimension, I think Jon and Dany are the only two humans in this whole Other universe (with the possible exception of Tyrion, but Tyrion’s really a wildcard, more morally ambiguous than either Jon or Dany imo and therefore much more difficult to predict). 

And so Jon and Dany reach out to each other – they have sex – as a celebration of their humanity, an act of defiance against an alien species that wants to destroy humanity. 

And this act revitalizes them, gives them their second wind … and they can go do … whatever it is they need to do … to defeat the Others. 

Love, life, salvation … there’s so much bigger stuff at stake here than “She’s my aunt”.

So no, I don’t think it will matter to Jon.

I have more Jon/Dany thoughts here, if you like: #jdmeta

-

**When Aemon gives Jon that “Kill the boy” speech, I think the mistake Jon makes is that he thinks he must kill his humanity. He pushes his friends away, he becomes isolated, he heartlessly steals Gilly’s baby. It’s cold and cruel … almost Tywin-esque. And I joke about Tywin being a golden cyborg, but that’s what toxic masculinity is … it’s a denial of humanity. I think Dany will have to help Jon remember what it’s like to be human. 

#asoiaf #a song of ice and fire #princesspudding #replies #lannister thoughts #jon snow #jon x dany #dany x jon #jdmeta #endgame #asoiaf themes #the meaning of asoiaf #daenerys targaryen